#letters to sophie

[letters-to-sophie]

I’m currently writing the follow-up that this blog was meant to prevent. I may or may not ever send it, I don’t know, but just writing it is making me feel lighter, so I think it’s what I should be doing.

Anyway, in the current version of said follow-up message, I mention thinking about things that I don’t know whether or not you remember. They’re mostly good, and while I would love to list them out in the actual message, it’s already entirely too long, so I figured I’d do it here. Because that’s what this blog is for: writing things to you without sending them to you.

So, in no particular order:

When you called me on Valentine’s Day and we spent over an hour on the phone. Yes you were with other people, but you called me. I dropped everything just to be on the other end of that call.

The night you called my legs… something. I can’t even remember what the word was anymore, but I think it was “magnificent.” My head was too fuzzy to focus and my heart was beating in my ears because you ran your hand over my legs. You’d never done that before. I really, really wanted you to do it again, but I was afraid to say it, let alone ask you for it. I think about this a lot, and I wish that night had gone… a little differently.

When you told me I made you want to be a better person.

The summer class in high school when you “spiraled” a football by turning it over in your hands as you walked it over to me. We hadn’t spoken for a few months at that point and I dreaded having to look at you every day, but you seemed to want me back in your life.

A dream I had not long after someone told me you changed your Facebook name to Sophie. We were sort of dancing around the idea of being together, and one of the things you were concerned about was that you weren’t comfortable with your body, so you didn’t want to be physically intimate. I said that that was okay, that I wanted you to be comfortable and that we could take it slow. Eventually, you said “okay, let’s do it, let’s be together” and I was elated.

The night I sort of half-dared you to find my personal Tumblr page (not this one).

Planning our future together. Namely that, on multiple occasions, you mentioned wanting to have several (I think we landed on seven) kids so that we could have someone to pass things onto when we took over the world. I realize that that was probably in jest, but on the other hand, there were absolutely times when I felt like I could conquer the world if I did it with you.

Honestly, the other main reason I didn’t want to include any of this in my message proper is that I’m also genuinely terrified that you’d react like some other people have to memories of things I know happened by going “I never did that and I would never do that, you’re crazy.” We probably both know at this point that I’m a little crazy—most people are—and my memory isn’t always especially strong, but I remember when it matters. And these things… they mattered to me.

If I ever feel the need to in the future, I might add to this list or go into more detail, but those are definitely the highlights.

I’m still hoping for an Anne/Wentworth thing, even if I know that in reality it’s unlikely to happen. There are a couple years left before it’s past the ten year mark that Anne and Wentworth experienced, but we were also a little older than they were when we stopped talking. Not that it couldn’t happen after ten years, but I’m a literature person, so the parallel would be super cool.

Anyway, I hope you think about the good things, too. Regardless of what happens, know that things were always more positive for me than they were negative, even when we hurt each other with words or deeds. I don’t think spending the rest of my life with you would always be easy, but I do think it would always be worth it.

- A

[poirott]

Benedict Cumberbatch and Sophie Hunter dancing at Letters Live → November 7 2024

Source: lisasbeauty_spot Instagram Stories (Thank You!)

[onscreenkisses]

LETTERS TO JULIET, dir. Gary Winick (2010)

requested by anon

[illustratus]

Elaine, the Lily Maid of Astolat by Sophie Gengembre Anderson

[clarissaweasley-10]

Need the Councilors to wear t-shirts (or tunics, whatever..) that says "Elves are human too, we make mistakes."

[elennemigo]

Benedict and Sophie dancing on the stage! 💃🕺 (Letters Live special event for The KOKO Foundation)

"Benedict Cumberbatch and Sophie Hunter were dancing together initially , and then, Sophie went back behind the curtain, but when a partner was called for, B went to get her again. Very sweet." (From leeannrvn on Twitter. Thank you!🙏 )

[otmaaromanovas]

Hi, it would be awesome if you could give us an idea about alexei's personality described by people in his close circle

Hello! Sorry for the late reply. Here are some quotes about Alexei from the people closest to him, and some extracts from his letters and diaries that show his personality.

Alexei's personality

"The Heir ran along the shore and loudly expressed his joy with every surge of water. In general, how much noise and fun there was! I still remember this time with pleasure. Water splashed, flushed and cheerful children returned home." - Sofia Ivanovna Tyutcheva, nurse/nanny, A Few Years Before the Catastrophe

"Alexei, the only son of the Emperor and Empress, a more tragic child than the last Dauphin of France, indeed one of the most tragic figures in history, was, apart from his terrible affliction, the loveliest and most attractive of the whole family. Because of his delicate health Alexei began life as a rather spoiled child." - Anna Vyrubova, close family friend, Memories of the Russian Court

"The more the boy opened his heart to me the better I realised the treasures of his nature, and I gradually began to feel certain that with so many precious gifts it would be unjust to give up hope. Alexis Nicolaievitch was then nine and a half, and rather tall for his age. He had a long, finely-chiselled face, delicate features, auburn hair with a coppery glint in it, and large blue-grey eyes like his mother's. He thoroughly enjoyed life — when it let him — and was a happy, romping boy. Very simple in his tastes, he extracted no false satisfaction from the fact that he was the Heir — there was nothing he thought about less — and his greatest delight was to play with the two sons of his sailor Derevenko, both of them a little younger than he. He had very quick wits and a keen and penetrating mind. He sometimes surprised me with questions beyond his years which bore witness to a delicate and intuitive spirit. I had no difficulty in believing that those who were not forced, as I was, to teach him habits of discipline, but could unreservedly enjoy his charm, easily fell under its spell. Under the capricious little creature I had known at first I discovered a child of a naturally affectionate disposition, sensitive to suffering in others just because he had already suffered so much himself." - Pierre Gilliard, Alexei's tutor, Thirteen Years at the Russian Court

"Spring 1915 …Yesterday he [Alexei] gorged on black crackers and in the evening, he was sent directly to [Dr.] Derevenko." - Letter from Maria to Nicholas II, Maria Romanov: Third Daughter of the Last Tsar, Diaries and Letters

"18 March [1912] - Pavlovsk… Recently, on the 14th, my wife had lunch with their Majesties, and was embarrassed by the behaviour with the Heir, who is almost two years older than Vera. He wouldn’t sit up, ate badly, licked his plate and teased the others. The Emperor turned away, perhaps to avoid having to say anything, while the Empress rebuked her elder daughter Olga, who was next to her brother, for not restraining him. But Olga cannot deal with him." - 1912 Diary of Grand Duke Konstantin Konstantinovich

"In appearance he resembled his sister Tatiana : he had the same fine features, and her beautiful blue eyes ; he loved his sisters, and they adored him, and patiently submitted to his teasing. The Tsarevitch was a lively, amusing boy, with a wonderful ear for music, and he played well on the balalika : like Tatiana he was shy, but, once he knew and liked anyone, this shyness vanished. The Empress insisted upon her son being brought up, like his sisters, in a perfectly natural way. There was no ceremonial in the daily life of the Tsarevitch : he was merely a son, and a brother to his family, although it was sometimes quaint to see him assume '' grown up " airs. One day, when he was indulging in a romp with the Grand Duchesses, he was told that some officers of his regiment had arrived at the Palace and begged permission to be received by him. The Tsarevitch instantly ceased his game, and, calling his sisters, he said very gravely : *' Now, girls, run away. I am busy. Someone has just called to see me on business." - Lili Dehn, close family friend, The Real Tsaritsa

"Sunday 13th August 1906 …we were all invited to have tea with Their Majesties. All four daughters came to the dinging room, and also, the the great joy of our children, the two-year-old Tsesarevich. He went around the tea table and after greeting everyone, climbed onto his mother’s lap. Igor was sitting beside her, and the little Heir happily moved onto his lap and called him “New” as he was someone unfamiliar. After that, my boys and the Tsar’s girls played with him merrily on the floor…We were all delighted." - Diary of Grand Duke Konstantin Konstantinovich

The following are all from the diary of Sidney Gibbes, English tutor:

"25 January: [Alexei is] On sofa: foot tied up. Talked about the dog and then showed him new picture-book. Afterwards made a paper hat each, which turned out badly, and then began paper boxes; I showed him one complete. He spoke more English in making the box and asked the questions relative to it in English."

"3 February: We drew things on the blackboard with eyes shut. Added tails to pigs, and his manner lost much of its shyness."

"8 February: During this lesson we played on the floor, and I made him flags out of paper by drawing it and colouring. He coloured one and I the other. Flagstaff was also rolled out of paper and tied with wire."

"3 March …Began the story of ‘The Fisherman of York’. He understood very little. A[nastasia] N[ikolaevna] came in from Music [lesson] and explained in Russian." - Printed in Tutor to the Tsarevich

"The Tsarevich lay all day, while we tried to amuse him as best we could. The poor little man longed for Monsieur Gilliard's company. He knew so well how to entertain him and make him forget how ill and weak he still felt" - Sophie Buxhoeveden recalling Alexei's attachment to tutor Pierre Gilliard during imprisonment, Left Behind: Fourteen Months in Siberia During the Revolution

"If the Tsarevitch had any peculiarities, I think the most striking was a decided penchant for hoarding. Many descendants of the Coburgs have been unusually thrifty, and perhaps the Tsarevitch inherited this trait. While thrifty he was really a most generous child, although he hoarded his things to such an extent that the Emperor often teased him unmercifully. During the sugar shortage he saved his allowance of sugar, which he gravely distributed among his friends." - Lili Dehn, close family friend, The Real Tsaritsa

"This unusual and exciting night seemed to fill the Czar’s young son with mischief. As I sat in the room near the Emperor’s study, giving the final orders and' awaiting news of the arrival of the train, I could hear the youngster running about noisily, trying to get across the corridor to where I was, to see what was going on there" - Alexander Kerensky, head of the Provisional Government describing the night the Romanov's waited to be moved from the Alexander Palace, The Catastrophe

"Suffering and self-denial had their effect on the character of Alexei. Knowing what pain and sacrifice meant, he was extraordinarily sympathetic towards other sick people. His thoughtfulness of others was shown in his beautiful courtesy to women and girls and to his elders, and in his interest in the troubles of servants and dependents." - Anna Vyrubova, close family friend, Memories of the Russian Court

Alexei was "elegant, intelligent, and had unusual presence of mind. He possessed, moreover, other winning qualities: a warm, happy disposition, and a generous nature which made him eager to be of help and enabled him quickly to establish rapport with others." - General Count Alexander Grabbe, Major-General of the Tsar's convoy, The Private World of the last Tsar

"in the periods of what may be called his good health, he had all the spirits and mischief of any ordinary boy of his age… As time went on and his first shyness wore off, he treated us as friends and… had always some fun with us. With me it was to make sure that each button on my coat was properly buttoned, a habit which naturally made me take great care to have one or two unbuttoned, in which case he used at once to stop and tell me I was 'untidy again'" - General Sir John Hanbury-Williams, British ambassador in Mogilev, The Emperor Nicholas II, as I Knew Him

""He had a kind heart and was very fond of animals. He could be influenced only by his feelings, and would not yield to authority. He submitted only to the emperor. He was a clever boy but was not fond of books. His mother loved him passionately. She tried, but could not be strict with him, and most of his desires were obtained through his mother. Disagreeable things he bore silently and without grumbling. He was kind-hearted and during the last period of his life he was the only one who liked to give things away. In Tobolsk he had some odd fancies -- for example, he liked collecting old nails, saying: "They may be useful."" - Testimony of Sidney Gibbes to the Sokolov Report, The Last Days of the Romanovs (1920)

"Alexis Nicholaevitch, being a very playful and mischievous boy, on one occasion peeped through the fence. After this was learned by Nikolsky [deputy guard at Tobolsk] he came and made a huge fuss about it. He reprimanded the soldier who was on duty and spoke in a very sharp tone to the czarevitch. The boy got offended and protested to me that Nikolsky was shouting at him." - Testimony of Evgeny Kobylinsky to the Sokolov Report, The Last Days of the Romanovs (1920). To find more about Kobylinsky's unique relationship to the family, see this post.

Alexei's relationship with his sisters

"We all kissed the Empress' hand and that of the Grand Duchesses. That year, we kissed the Tsarevitch's little hand, too; but afterwards, that custom was stopped, since the Tsarevitch didn't miss his chance to boast about it and give himself airs in front of his sisters." - General Alexander Spiridovich, Chief of Security, Last Years at Tsarskoe Selo, Volume 1

"10 January. Aleksei and Anastasia are both moving their beds into the playroom, where they lie next to each other all day. During the day we all have tea up there." - Extract from Tatiana's 1917 diary, Tatiana Romanov, Daughter of the Last Tsar: Diaries and Letters

"Aleksei, my little soul, darling little one. It is so boring here without you and Papa… I was just at the Grand Palace with Maria and Shvybz [Anastasia]… I squeeze you in my mind and love you very very much." - undated letter from Tatiana to Alexei, circa 1916, Russia’s Last Romanovs: In Their Own Words 

"As for poor Alexei Nikolaevich, he was as if rooted to the armchair the whole time [unwell]. It was touching to see his sister, Tatiana Nicholaievna, lavishing attention on him before the luncheon." - General Alexander Spiridovich, Chief of Security, Last Years at Tsarskoe Selo, Volume 2

"Sweet Piggy! Sleep well and wake up in the morning with a belly full of milk! Alexei 1914" - letter from Alexei to Anastasia, Alexei: Russia's Last Tsesarevich - Letters, diaries and writings (Volume 1)

"...Don’t tease Maria" - Letter from Alexandra to Alexei, 1 December 1914, Alexei: Russia's Last Tsesarevich - Letters, diaries and writings (Volume 1)

"28 January Tuesday …Too lazy to write this by himself, so Olga is writing it!" - Alexei's 1916 diary, Alexei: Russia's Last Tsesarevich - Letters, diaries and writings (Volume 2)

Alexei's haemophilia

"Everything possible, everything known to medical science, was done for the child Alexei. The Empress nursed him herself, as indeed, with the assistance of professional women, she had nursed all her children. Three trained Russian nurses were in attendance, with the Empress always superintending. She bathed the babe herself, and was with him so much that the Court, ever censorious of her, complained that she was more of a nurse than an Empress." - Anna Vyrubova, close family friend, Memories of the Russian Court

"Livadia. 30 August 1913 …Alexei is well. He has already had 4 mud baths. I took a photo of him when he was being treated in the mud and will glue in an album for you. Alexei’s leg stretched 175 degrees and the leg is almost straight" - letter from Maria to former nanny/nurse Maria Ivanovna Vishnyakova. Maria Ivanovna Vishnyakova was Alexei’s nanny, though was dismissed by Alexandra following disagreements and allegations against Rasputin. I find it intriguing that the girls stayed in touch with her and kept her informed of Alexei's health.

I have slightly less information/quotes on Alexei saved as my research is largely about his sisters, but I hope that this was insightful nonetheless. Thank you for your question!

[thelostsmiles]

Benedict Cumberbatch was at Wilderness Festival this year for Letters Live. He took the opportunity to make a hbd video for his mother, Wanda Ventham, who turned 88. Before that, he did mention two others:

"I'm going to abuse my position of power of having a microphone in front of a lot of people and say, Sophie Hunter, I love you." "Can Lucy Forbes come backstage afterwards if she's here? You're amazing."

He's the sweetest.

[archduchessofnowhere]

Archduchess Sophie in Die Kaiserin: *orders public executions, reigns from the shadows, tries to force FJ to marry someone he doesn't want, tries to emotionally break Elisabeth into submission, doesn't love Max, cheats on her husband*

Archduchess Sophie in her letters: My beloved son❤️ I hope you're doing well💪 Yesterday Papa👨 and I had tea🍵 with Ludwig👦, Grandmama👵 and Uncle Ludwig👴. Sisi👸 looked so beautiful at the ball💃 in her new gown👗, she has such great style!! I'm going to order a dress for me just like hers❤️ The current situation in Italy is stressing me so much😞 but Franzi👑💕 will surely prevail!! All my love, mama❤️💕 

[dumvixerum]

i loved this game ughhugh

[letters-to-sophie]

Dear Sophie,

Happy Pride. You’ve always been beautiful to me.

- A ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

[sophiethewitch1]

Its currently may 18, my birthday!

So what better way to celebrate than draw WWWreader experiencing the worst birthdays of her life two times LMAO

omg dude happy birthday!!! i hope you have (had maybe) an absolutely fantastic day!!!!! ALSO URGHKDJSGBNKSDGBSDGHKJB CELEBRATING.... AND YET I'M BEING GIFTED SUCH AMAZING ART.... nnnnnnnghhh thank you once again!!! also yeah the fact that she had to go through this twice lmao get fucked <3

[roses-of-the-romanovs]

"Tatiana Nicolaevna was to my mind prettier than her sisters. She was taller even than the Empress, but she was so slight and well–proportioned that her great height was not remarkable. She had fine, regular features, recalling pictures of ancestresses who had been famous beauties. She had dark hair, a rather pale complexion, and wide-apart, light-brown eyes that gave her a poetic far-away look not quite in keeping with her character. This was a mixture of exactness, thoroughness and perseverance, with leanings towards poetic and abstract ideas. She was closest in sympathy to her mother, and was the definite favorite of both her parents. She was completely unselfish, always ready to give up her own plans to go for a walk with her father, to read to her mother, to do anything that was wanted. It was Tatiana Nicolaevna who took care of the little ones, and who was a constant help to the Household, always willing to help them in arranging that their official duties should not clash with their private engagements. She had the Empress’s practical mind and love of detail. She planned and arranged everything in the ‘Children’s Quarters’ as it was called. She had a less strong character than Olga Nicolaevna, whose lead she would always follow, but she could make up her mind in an emergency quicker than her elder sister, and never lost her head.

"When her brother was ill, Tatiana Nicolaevna could take her mother’s place, following the doctor’s directions and playing with the sick boy for hours. Out of a sense of public duty, she took more than her share of public appearances. She was shy, like all her sisters, but her natural friendliness made her want to say friendly things to other people. She became much better known than her cleverer elder sister, as she took more trouble about the people she met.

"Tatiana Nikolaevna loved dress. Any frock, no matter how old, looked well on her. She knew how to put on her clothes, was admired and liked admiration. She was sociable, and friends would have been welcome, but no young girls were ever asked to the Palace."

—Sophie Buxhoeveden

[artnerdsrule]

What was more culturally significant,

the Renaissance or Keefe's letter in unlocked???

[baeshijima]

SOPHIE PLEASEEE HEAR ME OUT...

in light of blade canonically having a drivers license, designated driver!blade

he drives you home when you're drunk (he acts annoyed but he's turning on the heater in his car and putting his jacket over you like tucking you under a blanket and putting the cat neck pillow you left in his car on you and changing the radio station to one that's playing soft tunes and turning the volume down)

he picks you up from failed dates (not knowing if he should be relieved that it failed or be sad because you look sad + he threatens to hunt down your date and beat them up if you share that they said smth rude)

he magically appears with his car when you're stranded in the rain despite not telling him about your situation (consensually having each other's locations on and him noticing that there's heavy rain where you are and immediately hops into his car to get to where you are before kafka can even finish her quip about how he would never have That level of urgency if the rest of them were stuck in the rain)

NONNIE YES YES YES TO ALL OF THIS MY EARS ARE WIDE OPEN HELLO 😩

designated driver!blade who, whenever you offhandedly mention going somewhere, will always check his phone for the distance and predicted weather in that area. past a five minute walking distance? already grabbing his keys for the car to drive you there before you can even stand up. oh, there's at least a 10% chance for rain? don't worry! he already grabbed an umbrella and is now on his way to make sure the car roof is up and that the wipers actually work! you're running late for something and need to be there asap? well, what's a few speed limits against his indomitable will to see you happy?

resistance is futile, you realised during the early days when he started this habit. even if you were to protest and make the rational argument of "it's literally around the corner" or "public transport exists for a reason", he will merely give you a withering, deadpan stare before continuing his way to the car knowing you don't have the heart to leave him waiting there despite all your protests. it's come to a point where you don't even have to announce you're going somewhere for him to know, merely getting the keys and following you out as you resign to your fate of having blade as your personal chauffeur.

(though you have to admit, his song choices are pretty banger, and he has definitely saved you from some tough situations more times than you can count with his rather impeccable timing.)

[sailforvalinor]

Cheers to Leverage for abiding by the classic five-man-band rule that the group goes to pieces when the heart leaves