#let me see your organs boy where's your uterus

[infectiouspiss]

guy who reads omegaverse fics not for the sex but because he's interested in fictional biology

[star-dust-stuf]

Dead Poets x fem!reader

title: love, to come into me

warnings: body insecurities

a/n: here I am with another dps fic because they're so cute and make me happy and I want others to be happy too! sorry it's so short and sorry for typos, with love.

-

I was back stage with Neil, he wanted me to do this play with him, it was in the beginning of August and he really was determined to do this play after the boys and me begged his father. 

He wanted me to be on stage with him because he knew I was always one to be left out. He was sweet like that, and though I had my stage fright, I knew Keating and the boys would be up front guarding me from all those other people. 

I was looking at myself in the mirror, the outfit was absolutely beautiful, but it was tight around my waist, and I had a lower belly bump. 

I knew that it was normal but it still made me feel I was throwing off the outfit, how beautiful it was and I made it look ugly. I glided my fingers over the little lump and wished it would go away. 

Neil peeked from the other side of the mirror and saw what I was doing, it took him a minute to realize what was wrong, seeing the sad look on my face and the his sweet brown eyes on me. He stepped towards me. 

"Y/n?" 

I look from my stomach to him, "oh. Hey Neil." 

He looked at my stomach where I was rubbing. "It's normal to be nervous you know." 

I shake my head, "no. It's not that." 

Neil tilted his head, "then what's the matter?" He sounded so concerned.

I sigh, looking at my little bump finally losing my patience with it. "I mean, look at it!" 

He looked at my stomach again. "What, that?" He pointed and I nod. "Y/n, that's-." 

He got cut off by the boys entering, all ruffling his hair and some of them shouting YAWP in which I couldn't help but giggle at. "Ready for the biggest performance of your life!?" Knox said to me and Todd ended up putting his elbow in his rib. 

"Knox, shes scared out of her mind." 

Neil shook his head, "no guys, shes..." He looked at me wanting to know if he should tell the others and gave him a signal letting him know it was okay. "She's just insecure." 

Pitts, Meeks, Cameron, Todd, Knox, and Charlie looked to me, Charlie stepped in. "Hey, what about? You look gorgeous in the dress." 

I smile a little looking to my feet, "its... It's my stomach." I put my fingers over the little bump, they all nodded as they realized. 

"You can't control that you know." Cameron said. 

"Yeah, all those extra organs if you know what I mean-." Meeks said.

I blushed, looking down and Neil smacked the back of Meeks' head. "Look what you did idiot!" 

Todd laughed with the others but then he looked to me. "You know what he means, it's okay y/n, you're a girl and that comes with some  things you see as flaws but it's not." 

I smile and nod a little, "thanks, I expect Meeks to know so much." I tease him.

Meeks laughed a little as Charlie smirked, "i'd take your uterus for one night but I wouldn't servive." 

I smiled and kissed Charlie's cheek, "I know you would." 

They all gave me a hug, and throughout the play Neil had his eyes on me along with the boys in the front row. It was amazing to have such supportive friends that I love and I could see every day at school, that I can be myself around and explain how I feel. They knew they could do the same. 

[basiccortez]

Defective- SFK

synopsis: you thought you were getting everything you wanted, but sadly it wasn't your time yet. moodboard by: @greta-van-yeet

warnings: ANGST, cursing, mentions of infertility, IVF, miscarriages, fighting. 18+ strongly advised

disclaimer: I do not personally know Samuel F Kiszka or any of the boys in the band Greta Van Fleet. this is simply a work of fiction.

note: thank you to the wonderful and amazing, Abbey (@greta-van-yeet) for listening to my rambling nonsense and helping me write this fic!!! I can't wait for you guys to see what she has been working on! it's amazing.

You wanted to cry. The hot tears behind your eyes held both the excitement and fear you had been holding in for the past three minutes. You tried your best to not look at the ticking black dots on the small screens as you waited. It was only driving you crazier, but you couldn’t look away either. Everything that you had been waiting and praying for was about to be determined in a matter of seconds.

It had been three years of being treated like a human science experiment. Three years of being told your chances of conceiving were slim to none. Three years of doctors appointments, spreading your legs so some kind doctor could take a swab of your uterus to test the thickness of the lining. You didn’t even know that was something that had to be done. The lining of your interior organ was too thin apparently, not suitable for an embryo to latch itself on to. Three years of being treated like a pincushion, dropping your pants for Sam to inject you at the same time, in the same spot, every day. Three years of tears and failed transfers because your body decided to not do the one thing you were put on this planet to do.

Sam never blamed you. He had supported you, holding your hand through all the procedures and tears shed. He was right by your side, making sure you took your meds, that you were mentally okay, and injecting your thigh with hormones. Sam was your rock, always staying strong as you were broken after every “failed” appointment.

But your most recent transfer had been a success. Your lining was thick enough and your doctor went ahead with the transfer, transferring the six fertilized eggs you had. Sam held your hand tightly, watching the screen as the doctor implanted the eggs into you. He had stayed up for hours, talking to your belly, encouraging them to grow, as if they could hear him, or if they had even stuck. It had been over two months since the transfer when you had started noticing the small changes. The constant headaches, the nausea, the achy breasts, all signs you normally got but the one that stood out to you, was the lack of a menstrual cycle. You had sprinted to the drug store, buying a 3 pack of clearblue pregnancy tests and a bottle of water.

The small screens were haunting you as the words read back. The wording ingraining into your eyes: POSITIVE. All you could do was grab on to the sink to stop you from collapsing. They had never said that before, they were always negative. Not once did you ever get back a positive pregnancy test. You let out a squeal of excitement, covering your mouth as you cried.

The sound of a car door slamming shut, had you turning your head to the closed bathroom door. You could hear Sam greet your dogs: Rosie and Bosco as he came in. You quickly grabbed all three pregnancy tests and ran down the hall. Sam smiled as he kneeling down to pet his dogs and noticed your frantic running down the stairs.

“Whoa babe where’s the. . . “ All you could do was hold the pregnancy tests up, as Sam’s eyes did his best to read them, “. . . fire. Are those positive?”

“They’re positive!” You smiled big. Sam stood up from the ground and ran over to you on the stairs, taking all three in his hand.

“Oh my god. . . oh my god! They’re positive! Oh my god!” Sam yelled and threw his arms around your middle hugging you tightly. He kissed your cheek and nuzzled his head into your neck, letting his own tears fall down his face.

He had been waiting for this moment just as much as you had. He had never shown you his emotions throughout this process, to him, it was important he was the strong one. He wasn’t the one who was being injected and examined and their body was failing them constantly. Sam hid his emotions well, locking himself in the bathroom at night while you were sleeping, putting a towel underneath the door jam, and breaking down. Silent sobs would leave his mouth and he prayed that you wouldn’t wake up and hear him. He cried almost every night, feeling like a failure too. He didn’t understand, it was so easy for the people around him to get pregnant without trying, but for some reason, it was mission impossible for you guys.

Sam let you go, setting you back down on the step carefully. He leaned his forehead against yours, cradling your face in his hands, “I love you, so fucking much.” He whispered against your lips.

“I love you too, Sammy,” You whispered back, your hands finding their way to his face. You two stood there in silence, in each other’s embrace, soaking in the moment. The moment that you had wanted since day one. Sam always wanted to be a dad, and you always wanted to be a mom.

------------------------

You and Sam had been cloud nine for a week after finding out you were pregnant. Sam had told the other three boys the very next day. The boys had known about your guys fertility issues, they had also been a rock to help you and Sam stand tall after failures. Sam had confided in each of them, Danny more than his own brothers. Danny was his twin flame, he could read Sam like an open book. The boys were beyond ecstatic that you and Sam were pregnant. They all had their own little families, and could see the painful looks on your guys' faces anytime they would come visit. Mackenzi, Jita, and Josh’s wife did their best to give you time with their babies, but you had started to gently decline, your own pain becoming too much to bear, and didn’t want their pity.

Sam held your hand tightly as his knee was bouncing quickly. You guys were at your first doctor's appointment, the first time you will be able to see your baby. Sam’s hands were shaking and your heart was pounding in your chest. Usually these appointments were disappointing, telling you guys that the transfer process was being halted or had failed because of you. But for once you were optimistic. The hardest part was over, and now you just wanted to see your growing little baby.

“Knock, knock,” The doctor said, poking her head inside the exam room. You smiled up at her as she walked in, “Y/N, Sam, let’s take a look at that baby, shall we?”

“Oh fuck yeah,” Sam breathed out. You smiled at him as he kissed your hand. He stood up from the chair he was sitting in, standing by your head, his eyes trained on the ultrasound machine screen.

“This is going to be cold,” The doctor said, picking up the gel and squirting it on your belly. You were used to the feeling by now, once a month you had an ultrasound to get lining measurements.

The doctor placed the transducer on your belly, and moved it around, getting the view of the inside of your body. You looked up at Sam with a smile, who shot one back down at you, before his coffee colored eyes went back to the screen. Your eyes went to the doctor, who had a puzzled look on her face. She clicked on several keys on the keyboard, while moving the transducer around to get a better look. She moved it around several times, pressing harder as she moved along. She glanced over at you, a grimm look on her face as she took a picture of the inside of your uterus, and put the transducer down.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, Sam, but I’m not seeing anything,” She said softly.

“What?” You asked, your voice light and confused, “B-But I’m pregnant. I took three fucking tests and they were all positive.”

“I’m sorry, it was a false positive. Your blood work sent up a flag, but there’s nothing on the ultrasound. I’m afraid you're not pregnant,” The doctor said. You bit your lip and shook your head, not wanting to believe anything she was saying. Sam’s grip on your hand loosened as he was absorbing the words the doctor had just said.

“T-this doesn’t make fucking sense!” Sam yelled and you flinched at the sound of his voice, “H-How can three fucking tests be wrong!?”

“I don’t know,” The doctor answered honestly, “But I do see some good signs, your lining looks within good measurements, your hormone levels do too. I know this transfer had failed, but things look optimistic for the next one.”

You nodded and looked away from her. She handed you a cloth to wipe up your belly, and you took it, mumbling a thanks. She apologized once again before leaving you and Sam alone in the room. The feeling of dread falling over the both of you. You were back to the beginning. The feeling of heartbreak and misery filling the room. Neither of you two spoke as you walked out of the room and back into the main waiting room, which was filled with expecting mothers. You felt like they were all mocking you with their protruding stomachs and bright smiles on their faces.

You two also didn’t say a word as you drove home. You didn’t even touch each other, being as far away in his car as you could possibly get. Sam pushed past the dogs, not greeting them like he usually would as he walked into the kitchen, grabbing the kettle and filling it up. You greeted the dogs and slowly walked into the kitchen as Sam had his back to you, looking out into the backyard. You sat at the kitchen island and put your head in your hands.

“At Least there was some good out of that,” You sighed. Sam scoffed, still looking out the window, “My lining is still thick and my hormone levels are good. That’s something is positive.”

Sam pushed off from his spot as the kettle started to whistle, opening up the cupboard and slamming it shut, mumbling something under his breath. You squinted at him, feeling the anger rolling off his body.

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you.”

“It’s nothing,” Sam grumbled. He still had his back to you as he poured water into two mugs, placing tea bags in both.

“No, what is it.” You demanded from him.

He sighed and finally turned around to face you, “I can’t keep doing this. The false positives, the tears, the appointments, the ounce of fucking happiness for it to get stripped away in a matter of seconds.”

You stood up from your spot, and walked over to him, placing a hand on his bicep, rubbing your hand up and down it slowly, “I’m sorry. But when it’s our time, it’ll be our time. We still have frozen eggs and you heard the doctor, things are looking really good right now.”

Sam looked you in the eye, his face unreadable, as he shoved past you, “Your optimism makes me sick.”

Your jaw dropped. He had never said anything like this to you before. Usually Sam was the one picking up the pieces after disappointing appointments like todays. You followed Sam into the living room, as he set his mug down on the mantle, and ran his hands through his hair. His body language looked like he was ready for an argument, but his head and heart were telling him to just let it go.

“What the fuck!” You sneered, “Why would you say something like that?”

“Because you don’t realize this shit is fucking with me too!” Sam’s voice cracked as he yelled, turning around to face you. Tears were running down his face, leaving red streaks down his cheeks, “I am here too! I go through this pain too! I lost a child too!”

“I’m not saying you fucking didn’t, Sam! Or you’re not in pain too!”

“You don’t fucking acknowledge it!” Sam yelled, and stepped back, running a hand over his face, “I told my brothers and my best friend. I told my mother. Now I’m supposed to say ‘sike! It was all a lie! Y/N’s still not pregnant, again.'”

“You’re not the one who’s walking around like a constant fucking failure!” You screamed, “You’re not the one who is constantly getting asked when we are having kids! Everyone around me has kids and everyone looks at me like I’m fucking broken!”

“That’s not my fucking fault,” Sam said back, shaking his head and pointing to himself, “I have done everything I can to help you, Y/N!”

“I never said it fucking was, Sam!”

“You’re fucking acting like it!”

You screamed and stormed back into the kitchen. Sam hot on your heels. You two had never fought like this before. You both had a mutual understanding that this was hard on both of you. It took two to make a baby, no matter how that baby was made. Sam had felt just as guilty and sad about the failures along the way as you did. Sam had promised you time and time again that he never blamed you for what couldn’t happen.

“Real fucking mature, Y/N! Throw a fucking tantrum!” Sam yelled, as you gripped the counter, your back to him to hide the tears running down your face now too.

“I’m immature!?” You yelled turning around, “You’re fucking immature Sam!”

“It’s not my fucking fault your body can’t do the one thing it’s supposed to fucking do! I’m not the fucking defective one!”

As soon as the words left his mouth he regretted it. The look in your eyes said everything you were feeling. Sam had felt like he had just punched you in the chest, and that’s what it felt like. You covered your mouth as you let out a sob. Sam said what you had been feeling all along, defective. From the moment the doctor had told you about your fertility issues you had internally labeled yourself as defective. You had even broken down to Sam, calling yourself out loud defective and broken. Sam assured you that you were neither of those things and that your time to be a mother would come one way or another.

You shook your head, digging deep to find your voice, “If I’m so fucking defective, how about you just leave.”

“Fine,” Sam scoffed, “I will.” Sam turned on his heel and walked out of the kitchen to the front door.

“If you walk out that door. . . don’t plan on ever coming back.”

Sam froze, his hand on the knob. His mind couldn’t even think clearly, as he pulled the door open and walked out, letting it slam shut. The only sound in the house was the sound of your sobs as you fell to the kitchen floor in tears.

------------------

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[mythicalninjas]

Bloody Season

Donnie and Leo X Fem!Reader

This is a serie of three chapters about Donnie explaining to his brothers about menstruation. His such knowledge was given by reader through a doubt he had during her period, and from deep researches.

Warnings: SFW, blood mention.

Leonardo was in the kitchen drinking some water before prepare himself for another training round, as he always do—a glass of fresh water soothe his nerves, relaxing his tensed muscles. You were caught off guard by his deep voice calling you, who was staring at his toned muscles (damn, it might had made Leo think you were flirting or something).

"Oh, hi Leo" You hide your embarassement with a forced smile.

Leo tilted his head sightly, a pair of blue eyes studying you.

"Is everything okay? You seem far away" the leader commented as walks past you towards dojo.

"Oh uh, yeah, I'm fine..."

"You sure?".

"Yep, of course" Another dork smile curled over your lips, making Leonardo shake his head and following his way to another side of the big space of the Lair.

"Oh, Y/N-" He called, turning to face you again "Wanna join me for training?".

You gulped by concern. Of course, you have always accept his invitation to spend some time in dojo—not to execute heavy ninjutsu, but for a basic self defense session, yoga, or meditation. It is, mostly, physical effort; and today you sorta "forbidden" of require from it.

"I appreciate it, Leo, but... I... can't..."

"Why you can't?" He simply asked, confused. You have never refused his invite for training, but today he noticed you were quieter than before.

You trembled a bit "Uh... You wouldn't understand..." your shoulders shrugged, making your form smaller than normal. Moving his nimble legs, he made his way to you. He had never seen you acting like this before: quieter than as you used to be, staying in your own personal space during the much time of the day, tired and sad eyes expressed over your gently face. He knew you were not okay.

"Y/N, are you sure you're okay?" He asked, landing his massive hand softly on your shoulder.

"Yes, Leo" You assured "I'm not in those mood days, ya know..." You looked up at him, watching carefully his worry face staring down at you.

"You're not okay. Don't lie to me". You felt the concern and authority in his voice. The urge of explain your fragile situation is big, but would Leonardo understand? You do not feel comfortable to talk about it; you're not ready yet.

"I..." You sighed deeply "I'm on my period".

Now who was caught off guard was Leo. The poor fearless froze with his hand still touching you, his mind far away from reality. What is he thinking, you thought, trying to not laugh at his confused face.

"Leo?"

His eyes twinkled, his attention back to you "I-uh, of course. Period?" He murmmured the last word to himself "And how are you feeling now? I mean!-" Poor man, he is so lost "I will- I'll train. Call me if you need some help" he smiled timidly, leaving you alone in the main space.

You couldn't help but let out a chuckle, walking towards a couch near you. You have no idea what Leo was thinking back there, and you would pay for know that.

Leonardo, in quick steps, head to dojo; his mind still lost in an infinity of questions, hipotheses, weird stuff. Why can't you do your stuff during your period? So many doubts fills his head. Leo stops a step away from the door of the dojo, face down and eyes locked on the ground. He doesn't accept being struggled by such of curiosity, and he doesn't dare ask you about it.

"Donatello" Leo called as enters in the computer station where his young nerdy brother was working on something which Leo didn't lose time to think about.

"Leo! You scared me!" Donnie protested, placing his hand above his upper chest "What happened?".

"Listen up. There's something wrong with Y/N. She has been acting weirdly in the last few days and it doesn't smell good and I'm not liking that. She didn't agreed in join me in training today and-".

"Whoa, whoa Leo. Chill out!" Donnie interrupted "What are you talking about?".

"She said she's on her period or something."

Donnie's cheeks swallowed, then the boy broke in laughs, making Leo blush a bit "Why are you laughing?".

"Leo, there's nothing wrong with Y/N. As she said, she is on her period. It's normal".

The leader eyes focused on a random spot in the lab, thinking, then at Donnie again "What do you mean?".

Donnie composed himself, leaning back on his skateboard chair, hands above his both thighs "Well" he lets out a heavy breathe "Do you really wanna know what is going on with her?".

Leo nodded affirmatively, stteping closely towards Donnie while picks a random chair near him and positioning it between his legs as lands his elbows above the back of the chair. It's the first time that Donnie sees his older brother's attention locked on him, which surprised the genius.

"Okay, I'll say. But you have to pay attention carefully".

Leo nodded again, Donnie's eyes moving over a screen next to him, its light illuminating half of his face "Once a month women undergo a natural process called period or menstruation". Leo nodded softly as listen carefully each word pronounced by his young brother "As we—everybody—knows, it happens within an organ named Uterus, or womb".

"Yes, yes" Leo agreed.

"The uterus prepares itself for pregnancy every single month, if the woman does not get pregnant, the uterus expels all its hard work which it has done throughout the month. That's why women bleed during this time".

"Wait, bleed? You mean blood runs out of their body?".

"Yep, blood runs out of their body... Well, what more... Oh, have you noticed Y/N's behavior before and during the menstruation? Women have syntoms of it. They feel cramps, lack of humor, tiredness, nausea, loss of appetite, and etc.".

"Oh..." Leonardo uttered, looking down.

"Of course, not every women feels all the syntoms. But they suffer from it. There are some women who faints by rough cramps".

"Geez, they suffer a lot...".

"Yeah, they do... But what can we complain on? Is their natural process. Y/N is one who keeps herself in her own personal space without interact too much. It's her way to be comfortable. She doesn't feel that up in doing daily stuff".

"I noticed that. Now I get why she didn't want to join me. And me thinking that she was bothered with something instead of... that" Leo giggled, running his hand over his bald head and behind neck "So... recaptulating all our conversation, m-menstrual...

"Menstrual cycle".

"Right. Um... menstrual cycle is when woman's body makes her go through a torture for not have a baby?" the leader lets out a nervous small giggle while rub behind his neck.

Donnie giggled as well "Yeah, something like this".

"That's cruel...".

There was a moment of pause, both mutant turtles looking around rether themselves. Is not comum two men have a debate of feminine stuff like what they just had, but at least Leo knows what is going on with you.

''Thanks, Donnie.'' Leo smiled, getting up, placing the chair back where it was, and heading out of the computer station. Of course, he is still with his cheeks burning for known something intimate about women, but he thanks his nerdy brother for open his eyes about something normal and obvious.

''Happy for help'' Donnie smiled back, turning back to his work.

''Hey, Y/N'' you jumped a bit as Leo's voice calls you again. The leader chuckled by your reaction ''Sorry for scare you. I know you do not have conditions to push your body to its limit today, but... Would you want to watch me training?''.

That makes you blush.

You grinned ''I'd love.''

[whatareyousearchingfordean]

A Period Drama

Summary: When that time of the month hits, Y/n wants nothing more than to curl up in bed and forget about the world. Lucky for her, Dean has other plans. 

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 2.1K+

Warnings: Language, discussion of menstrual cycle 

Author’s Note: I guess I'm emotional this cycle, who knew? Anyway, I wrote this because I wanted to die the other day, and imagining Dean's cuddles was the only way for me to get through it. This is a work of self-indulgence and therefore the Reader is a little less non-descript than I usually try to write, but that's what these things are for! Hope this helps my fellow menstruating people lie it did me xoxo Alex

Check out Alexandra’s Library for more works by yours truly!

A nagging sensation tugged on her strings of consciousness, bringing the sleeping huntress back to the world of the living. Her mind fought against waking, knowing not nearly enough time had passed since she had retreated to her room the previous evening. As the ache deep in her abdomen became more obvious, she stopped fighting and opened her eyes to the darkness of her room. 

“Fuck,” she groaned as she tossed the covers from her body, instantly missing the heat they provided in the recess of the bunker. Y/n rolled from the bed and stood, the action occurring too quickly and the huntress felt the familiar rush between her legs. She cursed herself as she bounded off to the bathroom on the opposite end of the hallway. The socks on her feet muffled her hurried steps as she passed the boys’ rooms. 

Once inside, she went straight for the showers and turned the hot water all the way up. Steam enveloped the space as she stripped her soiled panties and old t-shirt from her body. She let the bathroom turn into a makeshift sauna as she rinsed the blood from her undergarments before finally stepping into the boiling shower. 

It was unclear how long she stood under the water, searing her flesh and scrubbing away the metaphorical grime, all she knew was the relentless heat was managing to ease the ache from her angry uterus. The tentative knock on the bathroom door snapped her back from the silent reverie she had been indulging in, and Y/n noted how the water had gone almost cold. It was likely she had been in there long enough for Sam to have taken his morning run and if her own body wasn’t attacking itself, she might have felt guilty about using up all the bunker’s hot water. 

When she walked out in just a towel, her dirty pajamas rolled into a ball in her arms, she was met with a confused younger Winchester. All she could mutter was a weak ‘sorry’ before she breezed past him and back to her room. The huntress wrapped herself into a pair of sweats and a clean tee, braided her hair out of her face, swallowed a few pain killers, and crawled back under her covers. She thanked whatever higher power had made sure they were hunt-free for the foreseeable future so she could spend the day curled up in a ball. The pills kicked in quick enough to allow her to easily slip back into a blissful sleep.

****

It was nearing one in the afternoon when Dean made his way back inside the bunker, his hands covered in grease and oil from his work tuning up the Impala. He was wiping his hands on an equally dirty towel as he walked into the kitchen to find his little brother making himself a lunch. 

“Please tell me that is not your veggie bacon?” Dean wrinkled his nose as he watched Sam putting together a BLT, the various ingredients strewn about the island. 

“Fine, then I won’t tell you,” Sam didn’t bother to look up from his task to answer his brother. The look of disgust only depended on Dean’s face as he moved around his sibling to wash his hands in the sink. 

The older hunter glanced over his shoulder as the sound of shuffling footsteps grew louder, his gaze landing on a disheveled Y/n. The sweats that hung from her body were wrinkled and she had a blanket wrapped around her shoulders. There were lines across the left side of her face, indicating she had been sleeping recently. Worry instantly flooded his system as it was unlike their hunting partner to sleep this late unless she was ill. 

“Sam, what did you do with my heating pad?” her voice was coarse as she didn’t even bother with pleasantries. No ‘hello’, no ‘ how are you’, just straight to whatever business she had in with the younger Winchester. 

“Uh, I’m pretty sure it’s in the linen closet in the bathroom?” Sam answered, completely unperturbed by her callousness.

“So you put my heating pad in the bathroom,” Y/n rolled her eyes and Sam could only offer her a bewildered nod. “What is with you guys and not being able to put shit back where you found it?” The huntress turned on her heel, not waiting for a response before heading to retrieve the item she was seeking. 

Sam looked over his shoulder at his older brother, his brows knit together in the middle of his forehead. “What the hell was that?” 

“What’s the one thing Y/n uses her heating pad for?” Dean’s lips cured up on one side as he watched the look of realization flash across his brother’s features. The oldest Winchester dried his hands before peeking in the fridge and a few cupboards. “Looks like she could use a supply run. You need anything?” 

“Nah, I’m just going to retreat to my room and pretend like I don’t exist for the rest of the day,” Sam picked up the plate that held his lunch and scurried off, leaving a chuckling Dean behind. 

****

The only light filling her room came from the laptop that was perched in her lap, playing some television show she had stopped paying attention to a while ago, and the filtered light from the hall through the slats in her door. The huntress was still curled into a ball under her covers, attempting to use what little bit of heat from her computer she could muster as she had been unsuccessful in located her heating pad. She felt bad for ripping into Sam about it, but the truth was he had misplaced her belongings, something that she found happened often around the Winchesters, and she was over it today. Pain tended to make her grumpy, as it did most people, and she wasn’t going to apologize for being pissed at their carelessness. 

A soft rapping against her door had her pausing the show as she shoved the device aside. The guest didn’t wait for a response before they pushed the door open, bringing with them a flood of light. Y/n cringed at the sudden change, hiding her face behind her hand. 

“Sorry, sweetheart,” Dean’s familiar chuckle sounded before the click of the latch indicated he had closed the door behind him. “I come bearing gifts.” 

“What?” she was confused by his words as she dropped her hand and allowed her eyes to adjust back to the relative darkness. 

“Your water bottle, half ice, half water,” he set the green canteen on her bedside table. “The heating pad Sammy somehow managed to lose behind the washing machine,” Dean handed her the light green pad folded neatly with the cord sitting on top. Y/n sighed a breath of relief as the eldest Winchester continued. “And a sharable size bag of dark chocolate peanut M&M’s.”

“Dean,” Y/n caught the purple bag as he tossed it her way, biting back a gleeful moan. “I fucking love you.” She unceremoniously tore into the bag and popped a couple of the chocolate candies into her mouth, missing the rush of blood on the Winchester’s cheeks. 

“And finally,” he mimicked a drum roll with his mouth and procured a box from his arms, placing it on her bedside table. The woman frowned, unable to make out the object at first in the darkness. 

“You bought me tampons? How,” she trailed off, not only awestruck by the hunter’s gesture but amazed at his attention to detail as she read the label. 

“There is only one thing you need your heating pad for,” he remarked as he took the referenced object back to plug it into an outlet for her. “Also, you never snap at Sammy.”

“But how did you know what kind to buy?” 

“Kind of hard not to when you have a box of them stashed away in Baby’s trunk,” Dean countered as he perched himself on the edge of her bed. 

“Hey, those are for emergencies. Besides, I’m sure Baby understands.”

“I’m sure she does.” 

Y/n chewed on the inside of her cheek as she fiddled with the bag of candy in her lap, the kindness shown by Dean throwing her off. She offered the open bag to her hunting partner, who snatched a handful for himself with a grin. 

“Thank you, Dean, seriously. This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me,” her voice was low as the admittance slipped past her lips. “Want to watch some Scooby-Doo with me? You know, if you aren’t busy or anything?”

“I’d love to, sweetheart,” Dean winked at her, that shit-eating grin never leaving his face even as he stood and shucked off his jacket and boots so he could climb into the bed next to her. “Who could pass up Daphne?”

The huntress sat back against the headboard with a roll of her eyes and switched the streaming show on her laptop before unfolding her already warmed heating pad and laid it across her lower abdomen. She moved the laptop at the end of the bed so they could both see it and set the bag of M&M’s between her and Dean to share. 

The two settled into the cartoon, laughing in unison at the ridiculous parts and commenting on how the Scooby gang couldn’t have handled that monster had it been real. Three episodes passed by before a shredding cramp ripped through her stomach, the shock of it enough that she was unable to hide the groan as she had been so far. 

“You okay?” Dean shifted in his spot next to her, his head turning from the kids’ show to his friend beside him.

“No, I’m not okay. It feels like my internal organs are attempting to exit my body,” she snapped, instantly regretting it when Dean subtly recoiled. “Shit, I’m sorry. I--I didn’t mean…” Y/n was cut off as the pain returned just as intense as it had been moments ago, causing her to roll onto her side and into a ball, clutching the heat of the pad against her body like a lifeline. 

“Alright,” Dean huffed before moving the candy and laptop from the bed. Y/n could hear the hunter shift behind her, but her eyes were clamped shut as she tried to breathe through the pain like she was experiencing the contractions of labor of something. She felt the hard lines of his body lock around the curves of her own and his arm snake around her abdomen. His hand rested over hers as he pulled her tight against him, putting more pressure than she had been able to muster against her lower belly. “I’ve got you.”

The heat of his body on one side and the pad against her stomach, combined with the force he was exerting on her uterus, finally allowed her to relax fully for the first time since she had awoken that morning. She never wanted to leave this moment, utterly content in the peace that his presence in her bed brought her. The idea scared her a little, but she figured that was a problem for another day. Now she chose to just live in this moment for as long as he would let her. 

“Why?” she muttered into the dark space after she was sure he had fallen asleep as his grip had relented a touch and his breathing evened out, hoping he wouldn’t answer but knowing she had to ask. 

“Cause I wanted to,” his voice was gruff, indicating he had probably been on the cusp of falling asleep when she spoke up. “I hate seeing you like this. Figured it was the least I could do.”

“Dean Winchester, are you going soft on me?” she quirked up one corner of her lips, unable to fight the giddiness his words instilled in her chest. 

“Sweetheart, there is nothing soft about me when I’m around you,” he chuckled, earning himself an elbow to the gut. He grunted and the two of them fell into a fit of laughter. 

“I’m serious.”

“So am I.” The hunter was ready for her arm this time, his hand moving to wrap around her forearm and pull it into him so as to trap her even tighter than before in his embrace. Y/n struggled against his hold, giggling like an idiot as the two wrestled in the bed a moment before she relented that he was much stronger than she. 

“Honestly,” Dean placed a gentle kiss to her shoulder once she had settled, only encouraging her to melt further into his arms. “I’d do anything to make you smile, Y/n.”

“Well, then mission accomplished, Winchester,” she turned her head to flash him a genuine smile to which he reciprocated before planting his pillow-soft lips against hers.

P.S. I didn't even try on this title because this is just a little therapy piece and therefore no one should judge me. 

Forevers: @22sarah08​ @440mxs-wife​ @akshi8278​ @anathewierdo​ @asgoodasdancingqueen @atc74​ @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​​ @briagallen​ @callmekda​ @dawnie1988​ @deandreamernp​ @deangirl93​ @deanwanddamons​ @ellewritesfix05​ @emoryhemsworth​ @foxyjwls007​ @hobby27​ @janicho88​ @jbsgirl4ever11​ @jensengirl83​ @lunarmoon8​ @lyarr24​ @mishacollins4evah @miss-nerd95​ @mrsjenniferwinchester​ @msmarvelouswinchester​ @polina-93​​ @sleepylunarwolf​ @squirrelnotsam​ @stiles-stilinski-24-dylan​ @suckmyapplejacks​ @supraveng​ @tatted-trina6​ @thoughts-and-funnies​ @traceyaudette​ @tranquility-or-chaos​​ @waywardbeanie​ @winchest09​ 

[cupcakesandtv]

Five to Seven Years Early or Two Weeks Late Part 2

Read it here on ao3 Read part one on ao3 or tumblr This one is especially for @justmissg

Devi rolled over but Paxton wasn’t next to her. What was the point of staying at his apartment if he wasn’t going to be there when she woke up? Oh god, her mom probably called about ten times. What time was it? She opened her eyes slowly and noticed the sunlight shining in through the curtains. Devi lifted her arms above her head and stretched from fingertips to toes, all wrapped up in Paxton’s crisp sheets. 

(She did not spend the night just anywhere. Having dated Paxton most of high school, she was spoiled because though they had a lot of sex in his garage, if they had it in his bed, the bedding was always clean and well cared for. Her freshman year at Princeton she ended up in some frat boy’s dorm who was using a mattress pad as a sheet and that’s when Devi set the personal rule that if she spent the night somewhere the sheets needed to be clean and there needed to be a top sheet and a bottom sheet. She had standards.)

As if on cue, her phone started to vibrate and she knew without looking it would be her mom. 

“I know you two are getting married but I was supposed to get groceries this morning and you have my car,” Nalini said, skipping any version of hello or good morning. 

“It’s 8AM. Are grocery stores even open at 8AM?” Devi asked, sure that people did not go grocery shopping this early in the morning. 

“Yes, they are. Please bring my car back.” 

Devi groaned and started to sit up, but a wave of nausea overtook her and she laid right back down. “Yeah, I’m coming, gimme 10 minutes.” 

“Get some crackers.” “For what?” she asked, annoyed. “You don’t want me to go to the store for you, do you? I can’t do that today, I’ve got about 18 things on my list.” 

“For your nausea, kanna, I heard you whine. Get some crackers and you’ll feel better in a minute, but don’t take too long. If I don’t get there before 9, all the good produce is gone and all that’s left is organic. The chemicals on apples don’t hurt you, they just want me to pay more!”

“Okay, okay, I’ll be home in a few,” Devi said with a heavy sigh.  

The shower started in the bathroom and oh, that’s where Paxton was. Why he was up so early she didn’t know but at least he hadn’t abandoned her. She considered getting up but another attempt and her stomach roiling put a stop to that. It was a crime that women’s bodies had to do all the work of growing a baby and it was a constant hell of symptoms. She spent the better part of the last 10 years with a monthly period bad enough to knock her out if she missed her dose of acetaminophen and now, when her uterus was doing that thing it was designed for, she got to be nauseous. 

She checked her phone, Fabiola was shouting at Eleanor for some unknown reason. Just texting her name in all caps three or four times and Eleanor hadn’t responded. They all came home for Christmas but Fabiola left two days ago to go back to Stanford. Devi opened instagram and saw a story at the top of the feed from Eleanor that was the obvious reason for Fabiola screaming. She clicked on it and saw Trent and Eleanor spraying champagne at each other with some animated text over top that said “practicing for New Year’s.” Eleanor’s shirt was see through and this was not a story for close friends. It was out there for the whole world to see. Definitely reason for Fab to be shouting. 

Instead of going the Fab route, Devi called Eleanor. 

“Hello?” a groggy Eleanor spoke into the phone. “It’s too early, Devi, this better be important.” 

“We can see your titties on your insta story, babe.” “What?”

“It’s not on close friends, El, your dad and Sharon are gonna see that, but more importantly, so is the cute RA you’re into, He might get the wrong idea about you and Trent.” Devi waited for Eleanor to process. “Not that there’s anything wrong with you and Trent I’m just saying.” 

“Goddamit. I don’t even remember putting this up.” Devi could hear Eleanor roll over and smack Trent. “Why’d you let me put this up?” “You looked hot! People should see that!” Trent’s voice was just as sleepy.

“Bye, Eleanor,” Devi said before hanging up the phone. She sent a text to the group chat letting Fabiola know she’d let Eleanor know what was up on insta. 

Paxton walked into the room, a towel slung low on his hips and his chest just...looking like that. Toned, defined, like a guy who went to college on a swimming scholarship and you know what? No wonder she’d irresponsibly fucked him on his kitchen counter on Thanksgiving Eve. She was only human! Who could resist him? Not her. 

“Hey, baby mama,” he said, a warm smile on his face. 

“Veto on that nickname.” She gave him the finger and frowned. “Remember how hungover you were after Trent’s birthday, the year you and Marcus and Trent broke his trampoline?” Paxton shivered. “Yeah, I remember.” “That’s how I feel, right now, because somebody knocked me up.” 

Paxton’s eyes lit up and he sat down on the bed perpendicular to her. “Oh, oh! That was me. I did that.” 

“Stop being so excited. I feel like shit,” Devi added. 

He immediately schooled his face. “I’m sorry, I thought we were excited? Did you change your mind? I support you in-”

Devi put a hand on his mouth. “Shut up. I didn’t change my mind, I just need a minute to sit up and not feel sick.” 

Paxton snapped and stood up, almost losing his towel in the process and if she wasn’t so sick, she’d have thought about fucking him again, but her stomach wasn’t up for it and her mom was expecting her. The universe was stacked against Devi at this moment. 

He came back quickly enough with a sleeve of crackers and a soda. 

“I was reading last night and apparently you need crackers and some sugar first thing in the morning. Probably juice but I don’t have any so instead, I brought you a soda.” 

Devi gulped. “You were reading? About pregnancy?”

Paxton nodded, quickly. “Yeah, I mean, if you wanna back out, we’ve got a little time for you to decide because it doesn’t exactly sound like a walk in the park.” 

He was so sincere and concerned and Devi felt tears well in her eyes. She cleared her throat and took a cracker from the sleeve he was offering to cover for her sudden outburst of emotions. 

“I already called the airline and got on your flight. I figured I’ll go back with you today and then come home in two weeks, pack up this place, and put my shit in my parents’ garage until we decide what to do.” 

“You bought a same day airline ticket? Didn’t that cost a fortune?” she asked, the cracker hitting her throat and feeling funny so she grabbed the soda from his hand and took a swig. “Shouldn’t we be like...saving money for baby shit?”

“I had points.” He stood up and went towards the dresser, grabbing pants out of the drawer. Not looking at her as he spoke again, “Did you...not want me to come back with you? I thought…”

“No!” Devi said, trying to sit up again, feeling slightly less like she might puke from the motion. “I’m glad you did that. Thank you.” 

He turned around and smiled at her, tugging a shirt over his head, before sitting down next to her again. He leaned down, pressing a kiss to her forehead, softly. “I’d like to do more than that but you’re probably not up to it with your stomach being gross, huh?”

Devi closed her eyes and nodded, tasting the barest hint of acid, but swallowing and taking another drink of the soda. 

“I already packed. I can follow you over to your mom’s and we can hang out. If you say, wanted to come with me to talk to my parents or if not, I need to get a haircut too, you probably don’t want to hang out with me for that.” “Don’t cut your hair,” Devi said with a pout. Paxton laughed. 

“Uh, it’s too long and I don’t have anyone to cut it in New Jersey so,” he replied. Devi pressed her hand into his hair and scratched at his scalp. “Fine, but I like it like this,” she said. He shook his head and Devi pulled her hand out of his hair, looking behind him to see his suitcase all packed and ready. “Sure you don’t need to tell the other girls that you’re going out of town?

“Other girls? I thought we covered this last night when I was embarrassingly pathetic.” Paxton tossed her the top she came over in and her panties. “It’s just you.” 

Devi blushed, she tried to hide her face by putting her shirt on at that moment. 

“I suppose you probably have a bunch of texts to send, letting everyone know you’re off the market?” Paxton had this goofy kind of smile on his face and Devi’s heart flipped. 

But before she could respond, her phone vibrated again. Devi rolled her eyes and left it. 

“Let’s go before my mom decides she’s gonna kill both of us.” 

--

The brief encounter with Nalini was better than Paxton could have hoped. She took the keys from Devi, put her shoes on and then doubled back. She put her hand on his shoulder, gave him a tight smile, and said, “Congratulations.” And then left for the store shouting something about stone fruit being too expensive in a state that never gets cold. 

So having lunch with his parents that he hastily arranged seemed like it would be a walk in the park. Nalini Vishwakumar congratulated him! They’d announce the pregnancy and marriage to his parents and then they’d be out of there in time for Paxton to get a haircut before they needed to be at the airport. 

Or. 

That’s how it should have gone. 

“Grampax! I didn’t know you’d be here!” Devi hugged Paxton’s grandpa. 

“Don’t call him that,” Paxton added, taking his turn to hug his grandpa. 

“But I love it! Is it cool with you, sir?” Devi asked. Ted nodded. “Please! It’s my favorite.” 

“Yeah, it’s on his license plate, Paxton. You don’t put shit on your license plate that you don’t want people to call you.” Devi gave Paxton a knowing look. 

“Ojichan, please don’t encourage her.” But Paxton shook his head knowing he was losing this one. 

“I didn’t know you were in town, Devi! I didn’t know you two were hanging out again,” Ted said, putting his arm around Devi and walking her into the kitchen. 

“Just home for Christmas,” Devi explained and then looked at Paxton over her shoulder. “You didn’t tell anybody we’d been hanging out?” Her smile fell and she leaned over to him. “Am I about to look like a whore because your family didn’t know we’d been…..seeing each other at all?”

“No,” Paxton tried. “My mom just loves you so much if I mentioned it, I knew she’d get her hopes up and it’d be a whole thing and-” “And now it’s a whole thing and I look slutty. Okay, cool,” Devi whispered back, looking much more nervous than when she was chumming it up with Ted. “I need to use the ladies room,” Devi excused herself. “What happened, you knock her up or something?” Paxton’s grandpa joked. Paxton cringed and Ted’s eyes got wide as he whispered, “Shit.” 

“She’s probably puking in the bathroom,” he said without thought. Keeping secrets had never been his strong suit. 

“We love Devi so if this is what it took to get you two to stop dancing around each other, God works in mysterious ways, and all that.” He gave Paxton a pat on the back. 

“Let’s not saddle God with my moment of poor preparation when I was out of condoms, Ojichan.” Paxton shrugged. “Anyways, we’re very excited but please wing man me into a good segue to tell my parents?”

“I’d leave that bit about the condoms out,” Ted said, laughing to himself. “Yeah, good call.” 

“Paxton,” a concerned June Hall-Yoshida started as she came into the kitchen. “Is Devi puking in our downstairs bathroom?” “Probably,” Paxton said, giving a tight smile. 

“You know I have a delicate immune system in the winter, she’s not going to get me sick, is she? Maybe I’ll go get my mask.” June started digging through a kitchen drawer looking for a face mask. 

“You can’t catch what she has, Mom, you’re fine.” 

“We hope,” Ted said under his breath, causing Paxton to elbow his grandpa. 

“She’s not sick,” Paxton added.

“Did you take that poor girl out last night and let her drink too much?” June asked, a tone of judgement directed at Paxton. “No,” he said. “She’s-” “Here, I’m here!” Devi said, coming in and sitting down at the table next to where Paxton was standing. “Sorry about that.” 

“Was Devi puking in the-” Paxton’s dad came in and stopped when he saw Devi. 

“I’m okay! We should eat,” she said, gesturing to the spread on the table. “This looks great.” 

--

“You graduate soon, don’t you, Devi?” Paxton’s dad asked in between scooping himself some veggies and passing the bowl to his wife. 

“Yes, in May. Now I need to decide which law school I’m going to and then of course, my to-do list is constantly growing.”

“Among other things,” Ted muttered with a laugh and Paxton gave him a withering look. He was not helping. 

“Speaking of,” Paxton started. He wasn’t getting any further in this conversation without breaking the news. He thought it would be easy but he was finding himself more and more anxious about it. Devi put a hand on his knee though and very slightly shook her head. “I’m going to go out to New Jersey with Devi.” 

“Oh!” June exclaimed, her hands covering her smile quickly. “That’s exciting. Take a little vacation before school starts up for her again? Did you get into a physical therapy program out there that you are announcing? Is that why we’re all here? Did you decide to go there for-”

“No,” Paxton interrupted. 

“Good, New Jersey? Too far,” Paxton’s dad added.  

“Well,” Paxton held up his hand. “I am going to New Jersey for a while. Until Devi graduates.” 

Kevin’s fork stopped midair and he turned his full attention to Paxton. “You’re barely here and you live across town. Now you’re moving to New Jersey? With your ex-girlfriend?”

“I’m pregnant,” Devi blurted out, a big smile that quickly faltered as Kevin Hall-Yoshida turned his glare to her. Devi turned to Paxton. “You said they were going to be excited?”

“I thought they would,” Paxton replied, looking at Devi for a moment, giving her a stilted smile and then looking back at his dad. He tried to save the situation with more information. “She’s pregnant and we’re happy and getting married.” 

Ted smiled, June smiled. Kevin’s face didn’t change at all. He finally put his fork down and looked at his wife. June schooled her face and Ted stood up quickly. “Devi, you wanna see where we buried the cat in the backyard?”

“Why?” Devi asked Ted, confused. “You wanna get out of here or not?” he whispered. Devi caught on before nodding and standing up to follow Ted out of the room. She got three steps away before she turned back to Paxton, kissed his cheek, and then left again. 

Paxton appreciated the small gesture, it felt like Devi was metaphorically behind him but he was glad she wasn’t in the room anymore. Whatever his dad’s problem was, he didn’t think Devi needed to hear the riot act from him. This wasn’t her fault. Well. Not hers alone. 

“Okay well, right off the bat I’d like to remind you that I’m an adult, I’ve graduated from college, I’m going to physical therapy school and pay my own bills so, telling you about Devi and I having a baby is obviously a courtesy. I don’t need anything from you two. Devi and I have got it. We’re not kids anymore.” 

It felt weird to have to defend himself from his parents but it was apparently necessary. 

“I don’t think your father is-” Paxton’s mom tried but his dad shook his head, causing his mom to stop. 

“You know, Ojichan isn’t getting any younger, as is, we’ll probably move him into the house in the next couple of years. And you’re never here. We never see you.” 

“He’s thrilled for us. Why are you bringing him up?” Paxton replied, very confused. 

“Thrilled? That you’re moving cross country for who knows how long? That you never come around?” Paxton’s dad sighed. 

“I don’t think we’re fighting about the same thing, Dad.” Paxton looked at his mom, trying to pick up any clue he could about what was bothering his dad. 

“He could get sick at any moment! And you’ll be in another state! Hell, he likes you more than he likes me and you’re gonna leave him?”

“I’m not leaving anybody, I’m going to New Jersey for six months with my pregnant fiancé so I can support her in her last semester at school.” Paxton leaned back in his chair and folded his arms. 

“Maybe your dad is feeling a little surprised and betrayed by your-” 

“Don’t speak for me, June,” his dad interrupted again. “I can speak for myself!” “You’re doing a terrible job at it,” June snapped back, then looked at Paxton. “Your dad has been feeling a little neglected lately. He can’t possibly say it’s because he misses you so he’s using your grandfather as an excuse.” 

Kevin huffed. “You told me we were going to refinish the pergola in the backyard six months ago and you have barely come by except when it’s a holiday. I was hoping we’d start to see you more in the new year, not less.” Paxton loosened his stance, putting his hands on his knees now. 

“I’m sorry about that, I did say that and then I got busy with grad school applications and the holidays and you’re right, I said I’d help. I’m going to New Jersey for two weeks, then the plan was for me to come home, pack up my apartment since my lease is up in February, and then head back. In that time, I can definitely help with the pergola.”

“Devi barely comes home so now you’ll barely come home,” Kevin said, not happy with Paxton’s solution. 

“She’s come home almost every three day weekend this year, actually,” Paxton explained. “It’s why we even had time to…”

“What about your job?” his Dad countered. Except instead of concern it felt like judgement. Paxton worked for a small swimwear company that made professional suits for athletes. He already worked from home because the company didn’t have a physical office yet so he wasn’t at all worried about his job. He’d just keep doing it in New Jersey. 

“I’m going to keep working. They’ll be fine with me relocating. They knew I was going to grad school soon anyway so it’s not going to be a huge blow for them.” “Do you have to go with her? It’s not like she’s having the baby tomorrow. You could stay here until she finishes school.” Paxton’s dad was really grasping at straws. Knowing it was because his dad missed him made it less contentious and more heartwarming though. 

“I want to be with her for all the appointments and stuff. And I want to help where I can. She didn’t do this on her own.” Paxton shrugged. “And I just want to be there. I love her and I miss being near her.” 

The statement softened Kevin’s stern look finally. 

“It would have been nice to hear you were dating before this announcement,” June said, a knowing smile on her face. “But I am very excited.” 

“I’ll make an effort to be home more,” Paxton said. “But also if you could just directly let me know that’s a problem instead of glaring at Devi and I, that would be very helpful, Dad.” Kevin cleared his throat and looked down, embarrassed. “Fair.” 

--

One more quick stop at the Vishwakumar house to get Devi’s bags and hug her mother and grandmother (who was absolutely bowled over with the news of Devi’s impending pregnancy. She actually looked like she might cry.) And then Paxton and Devi were on the plane. 

“Been a wild couple of days,” Paxton said, stowing their bags in the compartment above their row of seats. 

“You can always back out,” Devi said as he sat down next to her. “There’s still time for us both to change our minds.” Devi didn’t want to change her mind. She absolutely wanted to have this baby, even if pregnancy symptoms already had her exhausted. But she didn’t want Paxton to feel obligated and she didn’t want to do it without him. 

“Nope, not changing my mind.” He didn’t hesitate until she leaned her head on his shoulder. “Unless you are having second thoughts?”

“Paxton Hall-Yoshida,” she said, her voice already tired. “I’ve loved you since the third grade, the only way I’m changing my mind is if you don’t want to do this with me.” 

She didn’t move to look at him and she might have already fallen asleep but Paxton looked to the side, trying to see her face. 

“I love you, too,” he said before pressing a kiss to her head. 

[robbieisabel]

June has been Hell. June was probably one of the worst months I’ve had in a long time, and I know others’ must have been worse.

It seems stupid and trivial to post something like a monthly reading. But I spend the beginning half of June struggling to find joy, happiness, peace in anything. Funnily enough, hearing a ridiculous, wild, borderline insane story about Den of Vipers made me be like you know what? Let’s try it. And this crazy fucking book gave me ability to read again. It broke me out of that slump, where I was really struggling. And I got some really good books out of it.

So, here’s my few books I read this month. I normally read at least 9 usually more, but like I said, shitty fucking month. I thought maybe me telling you all that I let myself find some peace and joy in reading again during this time it could help someone else. Even if it gave them to power to give themselves some self care.

Now, I have a hard time picking my #1 of the month (it is NOT Den of Vipers even if it was very entertaining”. The Twisted series I’ve read so far was SOOO good, and I really loved Ronan and the story of The Darkest Temptation.

I’d probably pick Twisted Love as my number one with Twisted Games and The Darkest Temptation RIGHT behind it. I loved Ava and Alex the most out of all the characters, even if the story line was the most, ….predictable? Sometimes cheesy but nonetheless enjoyable. But I loved all the men of this series, even the Den of Vipers (Diesel scares the shit outta me tho).

So, I do recommend the Twisted Series, and the Made series. I’ve read all but the first one with Nico, for the life of me I just don’t care too 😂

I’m currently reading the Priory of the Orange Tree, I’m almost halfway through and boy oh boy is it awesome and entertaining and yes very confusing at times because a lot of going on. I can’t wait to see where it goes!

Also, women’s’ rights are reproductive rights are human rights. Anyone with a uterus is really struggling right now, and America is systematically trying to criminalize everyone who can get pregnant. The Supreme Court is starting a coup against the American government. If you can please consider donating to orgs like Planned Parenthood, Abortion Funds, ACLU, and local organizations that help our POC communities & start / organize rallies and protests. If you can, please consider finding a local protest, or demonstration near you. I hope you all are doing the best you can in times like these.

I will aid and abet abortion.

Abortion is healthcare.

Medical privacy is being attacked.

Please be there for your neighbors.

With love ♥️

[r00m203]

after birth

i’ve always been mad that we never got to see what happened when mulder went in to bring scully to the hospital after she gave birth to wiliam, so this is that scene. 

big big thanks to my favorite ladies @absolutetosh @scintillatingbluefishies and @stellaxxgibson for the beta and love. 

also i’m on ao3 now. https://archiveofourown.org/users/R00M203

_____________

He rushes in. The sounds of screeching tires and car horns are thick and muffled in his pounding ears. 

“Scully! Scully!! Where is she?!”

He isn’t  sure if he is  actually speaking; his senses overwhelmed by swirling dust, helicopter roar, moving cars, and complete, utter panic. 

Peering through moving windows at lifeless eyes, he screams her name for what feels like hours.

Through the polluted air he sees a familiar face. The surrounding erratic movement makes him dizzy, but he walks towards the face, struggling to move quickly, feeling as if his body is submerged in molasses. 

Monica. 

“Mulder!” She calls, finally spotting him through the smokey lights. 

He tries to analyze her expression, but can’t discern if her apparent  lack of panic is real or just what he is trying so desperately to see. 

“How is she?” he yells, finally picking up speed towards her. The ground beneath his feet feels like beach sand, seemingly requiring every muscle to move forward. 

“She’s inside!”  

As if breaking through a barrier, he pushes past her through the splintered wooden doorway. Monica catches his arm. 

“She needs to get to the hospital.” 

He nods, pausing for the first time in what seems like days to prepare himself for what he’s about to see. He breathes in, and enters. 

Scully is laying on a small metal framed bed, in a grey t-shirt he’s never seen. She’s underneath what he guesses used to be white sheets, but are now stained red. Red, he takes note, that is still pooling between her legs. She glows in the candle light, wet hair stuck to her skin, face glistening in a mixture of tears and sweat. Her eyes flutter inconsistently. She cradles a bundle on her chest. 

“Scully,” he exhales, a breath that seemingly propels his stuck feet toward her. 

Her drooping eyes snap as he reaches her. She turns, using the last of her strength to shield the bundle beneath her.

“MONICA,” she screams. 

He feels the pulsing in his chest quicken. He’s never heard such piercing panic in her voice. Not in all of the kidnappings, attacks, or abductions had he heard such penetrating fear erupt from her. She always seemed eerily calm when her life was threatened. His stomach churns at the realization that this time it wasn’t her life she was fighting for. 

“Scully, it’s me. I’m here. Are you okay? Is the baby okay?” 

“Get away from me!” She spits, her head still turned away from him, her spine curving protectively over the now crying bundle. “Don’t touch my baby.” 

Her breath begins to quicken. She groans quietly under her breath. 

She needs to get to the hospital. 

Just as he remembers Monica’s words, he hears her voice. 

“Dana, it’s okay, it’s just Mulder,” she soothes, rushing to the other side of the bed. 

“How do you know?! They can look like ANYONE,” she gasps. “He’s normal …. he’s not what you thought …. please …. leave my baby alone.” She pants into the bundle, her voice getting weaker the longer she talks. She’s struggling for air. 

“It’s a boy,” Mulder whispers, his heart suddenly in his throat. At the sight of blood still pooling between her legs, he suddenly snaps into gear. 

“Scully, it’s me! Look!” He gestures to Monica who helps tilt her face towards him. He turns around, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“Oh my god, Mulder,” she exhales, a breath that quickly transforms into an exhausted sob. “How did you find us?” 

“She’s losing too much blood,” Monica warns. “We need to get her to the helicopter now.” 

“No– NO,” Scully suddenly spouts in another adrenaline filled burst. “You can’t move me until the umbilical cord is cut, and he needs at least another 3 minutes.” 

“Scully,” Mulder starts, kneeling down to her, “You’re losing a lot of blood. We need to get you to a hos-” 

“I know I’m losing blood,” she shakes her head back and forth, “I’ve been losing blood. But he isn’t … My vitals are low so it’s taking longer … for him to get the nutrients he needs.” She pants, out of breath, “Please … a few more minutes.” 

She adjusts the baby on her chest, the shirt stretched down and over him so his skin is against hers. Mulder sees the top of his head– wet and red. Normal. 

The baby turns his little face to see what all the commotion is about. As Mulder watches the small blue eyes darting about the room and the tiny hands clutching at Scully’s collar bone, he feels a tightness spread across his chest. Tears flood his eyes. He reaches out to touch him gently, then her. Scully closes her eyes and releases the weight of her head against his hand. 

“Scully, you’re freezing,” he whispers. 

“I’m going into shock,” she says plainly. “I’m hemorrhaging … not enough blood is getting to my organs … so my body is … shutting down.” She shakes her head and gulps in an attempt to control her breath. “It could be because my… uterus didn’t contract enough … after he was born … or there could be a tear …or–”  

“Scully, we need to go,” Monica starts. 

“One more minute,” she commands in a voice so powerful they both know there is no way to refuse. 

Feeling unbearably helpless, Mulder tucks a strand of drenched hair behind her ear. She smiles slightly. 

“Monica, I need you … to massage my lower stomach … it stimulates contractions which …   slows the shock,” she chokes out, her voice getting smaller with each word. 

Monica jumps to her feet and presses into her abdomen. Scully cries out involuntarily and Monica freezes. 

“No … that’s right … keep going,” she grimaces and lets out a sharp exhale. Mulder squeezes her clammy hand. 

“Listen to me, Mulder,” she starts, looking into his flooding eyes intently. “In thirty seconds … you need to cut …the umbilical cord. Then…you both are going to… fuck,” she closes her eyes in frustration and inhales as slowly as she can, “pull out my placenta.” She exhales, exhausted, clearly using all the strength in her body to continue talking. 

He nods as she continues. “I don’t know …if I can stay awake…. to talk you through it.” Tears flood her eyes and he moves a hand to wipe the escaped ones away, ignoring the wetness scattering across his own hot cheeks.

“Once the umbilical cord…. is cut…. one of you needs to press on my stomach…. like,” she gestures to Monica’s current motion, “and the other needs to grab the cord…. and pull gently.” 

He nods eagerly, fear evidently plastered across his face. She winces but continues to talk, her voice noticeably straining. 

“Now….when it’s out…. ah…. there’s going to be even more blood,” she gulps and takes as deep a breath as she can muster, “Mulder–” 

He cradles her head in his hands and listens more intently than he ever has in his entire life. 

“Everything you need for him…. is in my apartment…”

“Scully, what are you–”

“Don’t buy storebrand formula…. it's not good for him… my mom will tell you what kind to buy…. since I won’t be able to–”

“Scully, stop.”

“And hold him against your skin…. when you feed him….it’s bonding… for both of you.” 

“Scully you don’t–” 

“And sing to him …. when you put him to sleep.” Her chest rises and falls quickly. She lays her head back. “I know you hate your voice but–”

“Scully, listen to me,” he takes her face in his hands. “You don’t need to tell me these things because you’re going to do them. We’re going to get both of you out of here. Safely. Okay?” 

She looks at him dreamily, her eyes beginning to gloss over. She’s not reacting to the pain anymore. 

“Scully— Scully, I can’t do this without you. You have to stay with me. Please–” his voice catches as his throat constricts. He gulps down a rising sob.

“Kiss me,” she whispers. 

Holding the back of her damp neck, he presses his lips to hers with more fear and love and pain than he thought was possible. They inhale together. He pulls back and looks into her closing eyes.

“I love you,” she breathes into his parted lips. 

He kisses her again, but this time she doesn’t inhale with him. He feels her suddenly limp in his hands, beneath his lips. He pulls away. 

“Scully? Scully!” He yells, lifting her face up, trying to shake her awake. 

“I’m cutting it now,” he announces to Monica, who’s already handing him scissors. 

“Press here,” Monica orders, moving to the red space between her legs as he replaces her hands with his. 

He does, and as she pulls, he feels movement beneath his hands, beneath her cold skin. Monica gasps as she successfully removes the placenta and the increased amount of blood Scully warned of spills from her too.  

“I’ll carry her. Tell the pilot we’re coming,” Mulder shouts, already drenched in red as he hooks his arms under her legs. 

“I’ll grab the baby,” Monica starts but Mulder quickly interrupts. 

“No, leave him,” he pants, “I have them both.” 

Not about to waste any time arguing, Monica runs out of the little wooden house into the dust storm that is now outside. 

Mulder scoops up Scully, making sure the baby is still perfectly nestled in her arms. The baby begins to squirm, letting out a quiet cry. 

“It’s okay little one, you’re safe. Everything’s gonna be okay.” He repeats the last thought again, more to himself than to his son. 

Her head bobs as he runs, as quickly as he can, to the helicopter. He tries to shield their faces from the swirling dust. Unconscious, she still cradles the baby perfectly against her chest. 

It takes Mulder, Monica, and the Pilot to get her limp body into the helicopter safely. Mulder follows. He cradles her and their child in his lap, forgetting the blood, forgetting the super soldiers, forgetting everything. He rocks back and forth, whispering the closest thing he’s ever said to a prayer against her cold, soft hair curling against his lips.  

_____________

thank you for reading and indulging in the ~drama~ 

tagging the women who inspire me as usual @scintillatingbluefishies @stellaxxgibson @absolutetosh @storybycorey @today-in-fic @baronessblixen @sarie-fairy @gaycrouton

[redstarwriting]

Period Pain (2nd Edition)

Avengers x Reader(s)

Request: “This is a specific request but could I have a story where the reader has their period (A bad one, heavy and painful) and the Avengers (Anyones you want) take care of them. Please make it extra fluffy.”

Word Count: 2,759

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: swearing, period, mention of Ibuprofen

A/N: The first one of these did Really Well so I decided to write for the rest of the people I didn’t write about. I still have to do the Guardians, Loki, Valkyrie, and Carol, so keep your eyes out for those ones, too! I hope you enjoy this one!

───────────────────────────────────

Mother Nature must really hate you. You can’t move, your cramps are restricting you from functioning like a normal human being. The only time you got up today was to go to the bathroom to make sure you didn’t ruin your clothes and the sheets. You’ve been curled up in a ball for the past many hours, and even snapped at your significant other earlier. You feel bad deep down inside, but the pain you’re feeling overrides your remorse right now. You’re in the middle of your self loathing and hating being a female when in walks…

…Rhodey.

He walks slowly and quietly, making his way over to your bathroom. “Why the fuck are you walking like I’m a feral animal that will literally leap up and maul you to death if you make a sudden movement you fucking weird ass?” you say, louder than intended. He freezes, looking at you. “Did you not hear what you just said? How you just said it?”

“I did. Your point?”

“I just proved my-”

“What are you doing, James?” you look at him, your expression completely unamused. He’s actually quite scared and begins rethinking the idea he had. But he clears his throat and straightens his back. “I was just going to run you a bath so you can relax a little. I heard heat helps with the… girl pains?” You stare at him, raising your eyebrows. “They’re called cramps,” you say, and he smiles apologetically. “I heard heat helps with the cramps,” he repeats, and to his surprise, you smile. “You’re the sweetest, you know that?” He gapes at you, amazed at how your mood went from bloodthirsty to loving that quickly. “I try my hardest?” he replies, obviously very confused. “Let me know when everything’s ready, okay?” You sound very excited and happy and he smiles at you, “Of course.”

…Pietro.

Well, it’s more like you see a flash of blue, then have a weighted blanket covering you, then nothing. About two minutes pass before you see the flash again, and a heating pad is next to you on your bed. Then after another two minutes, some chocolate and your favorite food gets plopped down on your nightstand. You appreciate everything your dear loving boyfriend is doing, but goddamnit. Can he stay still? You just want him to hug you and stop. Moving. For. Once.

Before you know it, he’s sprinting in the room again, and you announce his name loudly, and it is quite possibly the fastest you ever said anything in your life. Much to your surprise and happiness he stops dead in his tracks. You can’t help but laugh at the expression on his face and the four bottles of water with a container of Ibuprofen in his hands. “Why are you running around like that?”

“Well, uh… you see…” he begins, slowly setting the things in his hands down next to the food he brought. “I know you are on your period right now and having a sister I know what that can entail,” he starts, and you stare at him with an amused expression. “Uh-huh…”

“And, well, I know what helps Wanda, but I do not know what helps you. So… I asked Wanda what I should do and now I am… doing all of what she suggested along with a google search. But I did not own all of the things I wanted to get for you, so I have been running back and forth from the store this whole time. Also, you are scary when you are mad. Especially when you are mad at me,” he finishes, and you burst into laughter. “Pietro, that’s adorable. Also, I was only mad at you because you gave me a reason to be mad at you. So, don’t give me another reason,” you say, and he smiles. His smile, however, turns quickly to a scared expression as he hears you say, “Now if you don’t get into this bed and cuddle with me and don’t leave, then I’ll be pissed!”

He has your favorite cookies baking in the oven. What is he supposed to do now?

…Stephen.

“I brought you some more Ibuprofen,” he says, walking over and setting it down next to you. “I hope it helps.” You glare at the back of his head as he leaves the room again. Dealing with this with medicine and heating pads works, yes, but you’d much rather have the warmth radiating off of Stephen’s body to make you feel better. Sadly, it doesn’t look like that’s about to happen.

He may be book smart as all hell, but boy is he dumb when it comes to dealing with literally anything else. He of course tries, but he is so clueless sometimes. This is one of those times. He knows that certain over the counter medicines will lessen your cramps, and that typically applying heat also helps with the pain that accompanies one of your organs genuinely attempting suicide inside of your body, but he really doesn’t know what to do to actually comfort you. He of course thought of laying down with you, holding you until you felt better. However, that wouldn’t be very efficient for him. He needs to make sure the universe doesn’t implode, after all. He can tell, though, that all you want is for him to be around because of the way you’ve been snapping at him all day. Luckily, he thought of another plan that he hoped would work.

You sigh into your pillow, the pain nowhere near stopping when suddenly you feel quite the cozy sensation. You turn your head, curious as to what just wrapped around your body, when you get a big whiff of your boyfriend. You giggle, realizing that the Cloak of Levitation has just wrapped you up in a little burrito. “Cloak, what are you doing?” you say, amused. That’s when a note appears next to you, and you pick it up. “Dear (Y/N), I really do wish I could keep you company right now and make you feel better, but I have quite the workload right now. Instead, I sent Cloak. I hope that’s okay for now, if I get any free time I’ll be there. I love you, Stephen.”

You smile to yourself. As much as you wanted to be mad at him, you couldn’t be. He was really busy after all, and the fact that he did think about how you felt was enough for you to know that he wasn’t as stupid as he seemed. Oh, and he did get some free time, but he didn’t want to interrupt yours and Cloak’s little nap. He just took a lot of pictures.

…Scott.

“I was thinking, maybe I can shrink up and go inside of you and see just how bad this uterus is acting and then give it a stern talking to,” he says, trying to lighten your mood by joking around. You think. He’s not serious right? “You’re not serious, right?” you ask, just to be positive that he wasn’t being a dumbass this time. “Oh no, your brain must be suffering from blood loss. Your humor is fading! Whatever shall I do?! Oh, what a cruel, cruel world,” he drops down to his knees, beginning to fake cry which causes you to giggle at him. “Calm down, Scott, my humor isn’t going anywhere. I just honestly never know when you’re being serious,” you tell him, and he gives you a grin. “Well, I can’t blame you there. I do have something that will cheer you up though.”

You give him a questioning look when all of a sudden Cassie runs into the room, hopping up next to you in bed. You smile as she snuggles into your side, giggling the whole time. “Hey there sweetie,” you say as Scot takes a seat on the bed next to Cassie, sandwiching her in between you two. “She’s been asking for hours to watch a movie, I kinda figured it would be better if all three of us watched it instead of just me and her.”

“You’re absolutely right,” you say and hear Cassie shout a “yeah” in agreement. You and Scott chuckle at her reaction before he picks up the remote to the TV in your room, scrolling through Disney+ to find the right movie.

…Peter.

Well it’s more like he came through your window. “Karen said that I should get you these things,” he starts saying as soon as he touches down in your room. You glance over to his right arm full of medicine, a heating pad, lots of chocolate, and various feminine hygiene products. “I didn’t know which… things… you used so I bought all of the ones that I could carry, I hope that’s okay. Oh, and uh… I brought a lot of chocolate! I don’t really know why Karen said it might help, do you know why it helps? I mean, I obviously wasn’t like, ’No Karen, I don’t see how chocolate could help anyone in this situation,’ because I mean I don’t really know anything when it comes to this stuff but Karen’s a computer, so obviously she would know. Oh yeah, I brought a heating pad! Heat helps right? Or is this one of those things hear heat helps sometimes but the cold helps other times, oh crap, should I have gotten Icy Hot instead? I was right there next to it when I got all this other medicine… God I’m so stup-”

“Peter!” you make him stop rambling and one of the medicine bottles he’s holding falls out of his grip, and when he tries to save it, the rest fall. You laugh at his floundering to pick everything he just dropped back up. He rips off his mask and sighs. “I was just trying to help, you know. A now it’s all on the ground and-“

“Pete, just because you dropped it doesn’t mean it’s all useless.”

“I know, I know, I was just supposed to come in here all heroic and be like, ‘I’ve brought you what you need to feel better!’ and now it’s just…. it’s on the floor,” he says, and the disappointment in his voice is only the more endearing. “C’mere, Pete,” you say, opening. your arms so he can come hug you. “I’m all sweaty, (Y/N/N),” he mumbles, and you roll your eyes. “I need to take a shower anyways Peter, right now I just want cuddles,” you say, and lay on the puppy dog eyes. Those make him ridiculously weak to you. He just grins and jumps into bed next to you. You used the things he got you, but only after Peter himself made you feel exponentially better.

…Miles.

“Knock knock,” he says, walking into your room holding a stack of comic books. “Miles, why do you have so many comics?” you ask, turning to look at him. “Well, I know you have all the things you need to feel better with this whole… bleeding… thing?”

“This is true, I am prepared.”

“I know, but I figured the one thing you don’t have that you’d want is some good ‘ol Mile Morales loving. I also know that you kinda like the sound of my voice, even when you yell at me, so I decided I’d bring these comics and read them out loud. Oh, we can also play a little game where I describe the picture to you and you can tell me if it’s any good or not, I thought that might, y’know, take your mind off the pain,” he says, walking over to you and plopping down on the bed. “Miles I don’t think this bed is big enough for the two of us,” you say, but before you can even attempt to tell him to use your computer chair, he picks you up and moves you so you’re lying on top of him in a very comfortable position. The warmth radiating off of his body also makes you feel a little bit better. “Oh, okay, well this works perfectly,” you mumble nuzzling your face in his chest. You can feel the vibrations through his body as he laughs at you.

“Sorry for snapping at you earlier,” you say, and he just smiles. “It’s okay, I know how unbearable I can be at times,” he jokes, and you grin. “Now, how about I start with… well uh… I have a lot so…” he trails off, holding up all the comics he brought so you can see them. “which one of these is your favorite…?”

…Gwen.

“Do you wanna bang on my drums? Banging on my drums helps me,” she says, leaning against your door frame. You roll your eyes and throw a pillow at her to which she catches in one hand and tosses back. “I think you should bang on my drums,” she says again, and you sigh. “Gwen, baby, even if I wanted to do that, I can’t move. My uterus is really trying to end itself right now, and I swear if it doesn’t succeed, I will end its life for it by ending my own.”

“I thought I was supposed to be the edgy one in this relationship. Are you coming for my brand right now?” she asks, walking over to you. You narrow your eyes at her, causing her to grin and sit at the foot of your bed. “Okay, well, how about this. The newest season of that true crime show came out today…”

“No fucking way, I thought it was supposed to come out Friday?”

“It was, but then they said, ‘fuck it, let’s release it early.’ And I got all of my homework done. So, I’m totally free to sit back, rub your stomach, and get my fill of murderers and how corrupt bad police officers are. What do you say?” she gives you a sincere smile, which causes one to break out across your face as well. “Come here, woman.”

…T’Challa.

“Can I just say I have fought many a warrior, but you are the most ferocious person I have ever met,” he says, and you raise an eyebrow at him. “Is this because you were being annoying earlier and I let you know that you were being annoying earlier?” you snap again, and he points at you. “There it was. Terrifying.” You roll your eyes and turn away from him. The truth is he wasn’t doing anything annoying at all. You just really wanted him to stay with you for an hour or two and make you feel better with his presence, but he had some “Kingly duties” he had to attend to, so you’ve been alone. Dying.

“I have finished what I had to do today, you know,” he says, and you roll back over to face him again. “Oh really?” He chuckles at your immediate response and nods, walking into your shared room. “Yes, it seems I am completely free for the rest of the day. I have no idea what to do, honestly. I guess I’ll just-”

“Just stay here in bed with me? Yeah, damn right you will. Get over here yOuR hIgHnEsS,” you say, quite obviously laying the sarcasm on your highness to which he smiles at. The rest of the day was spent with the two of you just talking and you eventually falling asleep in his arms as he told you stories about when he was younger.

…Shuri.

“Even though you can be a bitch on your period I invented a new kind of heating pad for you because you are a spoiled brat, you know that right?” she says, walking over to you and dropping down the heating pad next to you. You give her a cheesy smile before thanking her and picking up this new heating pad. “The way it works is that it adjusts to your cramp pain. I’ve put a censor in it that can detect how severe the cramps are and then it administers heat accordingly. Also, you don’t have to worry about it catching on fire or anything, if it begins overheating it automatically turns off.”

“How did I end up with the best and brightest girlfriend of all time?” you ask, placing the pad on your stomach and letting your girlfriend’s technology take it from there. “Because she took pity on you,” she responds, and you laugh. She rolls her eyes, but a smile appears on her face none-the-less and she begins walking out of the room again. “Excuse me, but where do you think you are going?” you ask her and she turns to you, raising her eyebrows. “I am going to get us some ice cream so we can relax for a little bit. Is this a problem, princess?”

“Hey now, you’re the princess, I’m just your girlfriend. And no, carry on. Me and your dope ass heating pad will be waiting for you when you get back.”

“Mhm,” she says, and walks out of the room mumbling something about how you’re too spoiled, when in reality, you’re just the luckiest person in the world.

[ikeservant]

girrrllll can I please have some hc for mitsuhide, kenshin, masamune, and hideyoshi with PMSing mc? I’m dying inside help plz🙏thank you very much have a great day

Big mood right here! I’m in my PMS stage and I hate it >:(. At least I could imagine beautiful warlords doting on me to ease my woes lol >//< I hope you enjoy!

Mitsuhide- Mc walked down the hallway, putting her hand on her gut bc girl was in some menstrual discomfort. Mitsuhide, noticing the troubled look on mc’s face, walked up to her, asking “Is walking tiring you already, little mouse?” Mc replied with a snippy “No, I’m fine.”, right after getting a bad cramp and holding in a cry while putting her arms in front of her abdomen. Able to deduce that this was a part of mc’s PMS but didn’t say anything besides giving her a kiss on the forehead and saying “Well at least you have a short work day.” “Wait no I don’t.” but Mitsuhide was already walking away. Shortly afterward she was asked to go to Nobunaga’s tenshu. “It occurred to me that you were scheduled to take a break today. Under my direct order you are not allowed to carry on any tasks today and will be under the care of- “ “Don’t tell me Mitsuhide set this up. I’m telling you I’m fi-nnneee��mc, being interrupted by another wave of cramps. “I’ve just seen enough evidence that you are not allowed to work for the rest of the day. Mitsuhide is waiting for you and will care for you.” Annoyed that now her boss knows she’s PMSing, she threw open the door to Mitsuhide’s room ready to give him a piece of her mind but was met with a relaxation resort. Futon laid out, a hot cloth to be a heating pad, and incense making the room its own safe haven. Mc started to tear up before Mitsuhide pulled her in the room, insisting for her to relax and let him take care of her. Be prepared to fall asleep as he plays with your hair.

Kenshin- Avoided women like the plague most of his life until he fell for mc and got together, so he keeps freaking out every month until he realizing PMS does not equal medical emergency.Takes it back that women are weak and fragile when he learns that every month their organ goes on a crazy rampage and they’re just considered natural and put up with it until they get old. Asks if there’s a cure in the future but learns there’s only meds to help decrease discomfort. “Sasuke make a PMS medicine or I’ll kill you.” “Aye aye captain.” (only was able to make pain relievers so overall success). Still doesn’t have tact when asking “Are you on your PMS/period stage?” when mc is irritated, crying, or in discomfort (he’s just genuinely asking so he can help do not hit him). Keeps a mental note of mc’s comfort foods so he can bring them to her and makes her take a break from work because one time mc got a cramp while carrying a vase and hunched over tearing up and that was the breaking point for mandatory no heavy/physically stressful activities. Good at massages and will make mc’s back and tummy feel so much better. Bunnies are definitely the best heating pads and destressers for mc.

Masamune- Probably that one guy that goes “We’re in this together! UterUS!”. He’s a master of  comfort food of course. After describing chocolate and other sweets from the future, he’s gotten good at recreating sweet warm comfy foods for mc to consume. Thinks mc is a brave trooper for having to deal with a painful, uncomfy organ for a week every month and will assist his brave kitten with whatever tasks. Will rub her tummy when it feels bad, joking that he didn’t know that he had another Shogetsu. Good at making her laugh and relieving her irritability by being his usual entertaining self and reassuring her that it’ll be over soon. If she starts feeling bad while walking he’ll just scoop her up with a toothy grin and rush her to where they need to be, even if it’s to the war council with no shame both to keep her from cramping up too hard and to distract her from the pain while making her laugh. Would probably “innocently” suggest a hot makeout session to distract her and make her feel better (no harm in givin it a try ��).

Hideyoshi- Not very shocking that he’d be ultimate caregiver. As soon as mc shows the very first sign of PMS he will just go “Okay you’re off for the rest of the day.” and will not budge on that claim. He will be damned if he sees mc get hurt by working too hard with a beast of a uterus. Will make the most warm, filling food that puts mc’s gut at ease. Will literally try to do all mc’s work bc he knows she gets more irritated and stressed during PMS but will be sneaky about it so she doesn’t feel bad. Will allow mc to have SOME konpeito to eat through the day to comfort her soul. Will give heavenly massages that will make mc almost cry bc of how relieving it is. Will give mc a warm cloth and change it out frequently so mc has a constant heat source over her murderous organ. Will fret over everything as though mc hasn’t been through this before. “Are you sure you’ll be able to do that?” “I don’t want you to overexert yourself mentally or physically.” Is normally met with mc saying that if she’s been able to deal with school and work since she was a young teen she will be able to manage and knows how to deal w/ it. Boi is just tryna help and is a total worrier but he trusts mc’s judgement while also just watching cautiously with some good herbal tea to soothe mc.

[janicho88]

In This Together

                                             Pic originally posted by jrackles                               

Pairing- Dean x Wife!Reader

Word count-9825

Summary-The reader hasn’t been feeling well and is afraid to go to a doctor, because of her medical history.  One thing seems to lead to another, but she has her husband Dean to lean on. This is AU

Warnings- Sick reader, Little bit of language, A little angst, and maybe a little fluff, slight implied smut. Possible triggers talks of multiple surgeries some are a little descriptive, talk of possible loss of fertility, female problems.

 A/N This is my first fic I have finished.  I have had some things going on, I needed someone like Dean, this was the closest I could get to having him. It is unbeta’d all mistakes are mine.  @winchest09 and @katehuntington​ you two are absolutely amazing!! Without you two, your virtual lockdowns and the people I met because of them, I never would have had the confidence to finish this let alone post it. Thank you! 

You sighed as you rolled over in bed, time to get up and start another day.  Although you were hoping today was different. You were hoping the pain you had been having which couldn’t decide whether or not it wanted to be in your side or abdomen would actually be gone.  Something that had just been in your head.   You had felt a kind of off for the last 2 weeks but had kept that to yourself.

“Morning Sweetheart,” came from your husband of four years, as Dean walked back in your room fresh from the shower. A quick kiss good morning before he finished getting dressed and you headed to get yourself ready in the bathroom.  Soon you were both out the door and off to work.  Dean was a partner in his father’s mechanic business. It was doing well for him; he’d even added on auto parts store next door.  You were running your family’s restaurants, your parents slowly cutting back on their day to day involvement, but not leaving entirely yet because you were going to need their help in the new year.

You enjoyed your mornings at work, for the first few hours it was just you preparing things for the day, your radio playing softly your only companion. It wasn’t long before your daytime employees came in and the lunch rush began you all working as a team everything going smoothly today. It was while working on clean up and the dinner prep, one of your workers, and your friend, Donna found you in a back corner with your hands on your right side. When she asked what was going on, you told her you were fine and went to finish the task you were working on. Before she left Donna passed by your office where she saw you inside with a look of pain on your face again, your ringing phone interrupted her from saying anything to you then.

Dean beat you home from work and was preparing hamburgers to grill when you walked in.  You set your things down and met him in the kitchen for a kiss, “Hey Babe, how was your day?”

“Good.  The new guy, Gabe, I was telling you about should work out well, might be a little bit of a smart ass.  Benny seems to have taken him under his wing to show him the ropes. Those two will be interesting together.  How were things at the restaurant today?”

“That’s great! I know with your Dad, and Bobby cutting back their time there you wanted at least one more person in.  Work was fine, late lunch and steady afternoon which is why I’m later getting home.”

“How’s the foot doing? You’ve been on it more with working longer hours lately.”

“Okay, as good as it’s going to be for now.”

You two enjoyed a quiet dinner, then curled up on the couch to watch a movie before heading to bed. Dean noticed you didn’t eat much of your dinner, but he figured you were either tired or grabbed a snack at the restaurant.  

Your next morning started off about the same both of you on your separate ways to work. It was afternoon when Donna saw you again with a grimace on your face and a hand on your side. A little while later she saw your running to the restroom where you threw up.

“Alright, spill Y/N. What is going on, you’ve been a little off lately?”

“Donna, I’m fine.”

“Bull, lady.  Do I need to call Dean and ask him?”

“NO!” Your head went back, and your eyes closed as you thought about what you were going to say. You went with the truth, maybe she would tell you what you were hoping, it was nothing.  “I’ve been having a sharp pain in my right side, sometimes it moves to the front and is in my abdomen.  Every once in while it might go lower.  It’s probably just a sore muscle or maybe the ulcer is coming back”  

“And the upset stomach?”

“That’s new-ish. This is nothing, I’m fine.  It can’t be anything.” You almost whispered.

“You should probably talk to your Dr.  Maybe your OB first, given your history.  That’s what your worried about right?”

With tears in your eyes you gave a soft yes.

“Call them, and then talk to Dean.  Knowing you, you haven’t said anything to him, and were going to keep pretending nothing was happening.”

You walked away to call for an appointment.  Donna was right, you were scared, and you hadn’t told Dean.  You didn’t want to go through this again.  Around year and half ago you were at a girls day out when you just didn’t feel right.  You attributed it to worry you had about something at work.  It didn’t go away and over the next two weeks things got worse. You weren’t hungry, you had a sharp pain in your side, had started burping and not been able to stop it.  That one bothered you the most.   Then you started getting sick.  Overall, you just didn’t feel well.  You figured it was early February now, you just had a good old-fashioned winter cold. When you suddenly had trouble drawing a deep breath and it hurt to breathe, you had gone to a walk-in-clinic.  They thought it was your appendix or gallbladder and sent you to your primary Doctor the next day.  They agreed and sent you to a CT Scan the next day.  Dean went with that morning and waited while you went back for the test. You were told your doctor would have to results in a few days while they were getting the test started.  When they finished the scan, they told you to stay on the table they had a radiologist coming to read the scan right then.  That hadn’t done much for your nerves.  They told you something about a mass on your ovary and kids still being possible, but you needed to see your OB asap.  You had walked back out to Dean in the waiting room in shock, not 100% sure what had happened in the last few minutes.  You had ended up having a cyst on an ovary, which had destroyed that ovary and continued to grow into what your doctor called a giant mass. It had gotten so big it was pushing on your other organs.  They had to go in and take it out.  You were getting to the point you were okay with that part, but the doctor kept talking, and you kept squeezing Dean’s hand harder.  They couldn’t see the uterus around the mass and didn’t know if it had damage or the other ovary, and there was a possibility it was cancerous.  Suddenly the kids you and Dean had been talking about and picturing, might only ever be that, talk.  You had been a wreck the morning of surgery, but Dean was in pre-op with you as long as he could be holding your hand telling you everything was going to be fine. It didn’t matter what happened with the surgery.  If it was just the two of you, or if you ended up adopting. You were in this together. He loved you and the two of you would be just fine.  The surgery had gone well.  They only had to take the mass out and the tests came back cancer free.  

Things between you and Dean were good.  The last year and half had been crazy, no kids yet, although that wasn’t due to lack of trying in the beginning.  The December after your surgery you had ended up with a stomach ulcer and they found a fibroid on your uterus.  You really couldn’t catch a break.  Your doctor had wanted to put you on birth control to slow down the growth for now.  Here you were, once again worried that you wouldn’t be able to give Dean the baby you knew he wanted. His brother Sam, and his wife Jess had had their first child a few months prior and Dean was the loving uncle.  Holding little Jake, he could calm him down faster than anyone but Jess. He spent a bit of time telling him all about Baby, and the things he would teach him when he was older.  You were fairly certain he might get that boy in trouble with a few things, but that could be dealt with in a few years.  You knew Dean was hoping for the day he would be holding his own baby, and teaching them, you were afraid you were never going to be able to give him that.  

You were sitting on the couch when Dean came home from work.

“Hey Sweetheart, how was your day?”

“Fine, how were things at the shop?”

“Good, busy. Dinner smells great.”

“Thanks, it’s got about a half hour till it’s done.  I know you want to shower, but can I talk to you first?”

“Always.”

Dean joined you on the couch as you started explaining.  “So I’ve been feeling kind of off lately, not quite right.  Pain in my side and abdomen.  The last few days throwing up if I ate and drank much.  It’s a bit like before.”

Dean moved closer and held you as he asked, “Are you thinking you have another mass, the fibroid, or something else?”

“I don’t know, and that scares me.  I want it to be nothing, but we both know my luck isn’t that good.  I have an appointment next Wednesday with my OB/GYN. I figured it would cut some of the middle wait time out.”

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“Thanks, but I think I will be ok alone with this first visit.”

“Wait, don’t you have your foot appointment that day?”

“Yes, but it’s in the morning.”

Wednesday your appointments finally arrived.  You had been having trouble with your foot for a few years now, it had gotten so bad you couldn’t even wear a tennis shoe anymore.  You actually were supposed to have surgery on it a few years ago, the same year you had found the mass and had to have that removed instead.  It was a pretty simple appointment; they did updated x-rays since you hadn’t had any in over a year and talked again with the surgeon about what surgery would entail.  He was a foot and ankle specialist at the University hospital.  This was going to be your third foot/ankle related surgery but the first on your right foot.  You had had different doctors each time, and you like this one the best.  He was extremely knowledgeable and easy to talk to.  You may have been nervous for this surgery, but that was because of everything it was going to involve.  You were born with as the doctors called them extremely high arches.  It had caused you a number of problems over the years, sprained ankles, multiply breaks, and your two other surgeries.  They were going to go in and break your fifth metatarsal and put a plate in there and realign it, cut the Achilles tendon and lengthen it, you had tears in the Peroneal tendon which had to be fixed and then attached to the Brevis tendon to strengthen it, ligaments on the inside and outside of the foot needed to be tightened or loosened depending on the side.  You had had all of that done nine years ago on your other foot, but because of problems you had with that first surgery they were taking it a step further. They were going to cut the bones in your heel and realign them.  That part was making you the most nervous.  You would be spending the 3 months following surgery on crutches, possibly longer.  You had spent enough time on them over the years, you were pretty good on them at least. You had been planning on the surgery happening in January, you couldn’t put it off any longer.

The worst part of all this has been the not knowing because your mind is great at making up worst case scenarios, you were a bit worked up for your afternoon OB appointment.  You and your doctor talked and going over your symptoms he was sending you for a CT scan the following week because he thought you might have a kidney stone based on some of your symptoms. He also ordered an ultrasound to check on the fibroid. They don’t do anything with fibroids until they are over 4 cm and causing problems.  When yours was found it was at 3.3 cm, so they had just put you on birth control.  The doctor talked about what could happen if it was the fibroid.  You might need surgery to remove it, if it was to big, they might have to take the uterus out or there were shots out that put you in menopause for a while.  You were due back in his office in two and half weeks to go over the tests.  More waiting, just great.

Dean had dinner waiting for you when you got home. You explained the tests the doctor wanted and what he told you he was thinking.  You never thought you would be in a spot where kidney stones were an option you were hoping for. You two spent the evening on the couch watching movies compromising on your choices. Since Halloween was coming soon Dean wanted a horror movie, you agreed if you watched that one first and ended your night with The Proposal.  That way your mind wasn’t on a horror movie just before bed.

The next week went fairly quickly and your tests were done you were just waiting on follow up. You and Dean both busy at work during the days.  You had lost a manager, you mom had been taking on a lot of caterings which kept her out of the store, and Donna couldn’t pick up more hours because she was taking care of her sister, Jody’s daughters at night.  All this meant you were working open to close three to four days a week and at least 8 hours the other days.  You would get home at night and not want to move from your couch.  Friday morning you were doing your prep work when you received a call from your doctor’s office.  They had both of your results in. They didn’t find kidney stones; the fibroid had doubled in size and there was a mass on your remaining ovary.  Your follow-up appointment with them was 10 days away, but they wanted to see you as soon as you could come in the next day they were open, which was Tuesday.  The last surgery you needed was like that, everything done asap.  You had found out about the mass and a week later you were in surgery.

You hung up with them and called Dean in tears.  Your mind automatically going through worse case scenarios.  He did his best to calm you down and tell you everything would be okay. You two were going to be alright. You called your mom when you hung up from Dean and filled her in on your results. Making yourself get back to work.

Being a Friday, you had a busy lunch rush and had a bit of clean up and more prep work to get ready for the dinner rush.  You were working in the back when the door buzzer went off notifying you of someone coming in.  Donna called you to the front saying a customer needed your help.  The first genuine smile you had all day coming to your face as you took in Dean standing there with a bunch of colorful flowers.  

“Oh Dean, they’re beautiful! Thank you!”

“Not half as beautiful as you Y/N, how are you holding up sweetheart?”    

“I’ve been better. It’s going to be a long weekend waiting to see what he has to say.  My mom talked to my cousin who does some work at the hospital, a friend of hers works for an OB/GYN who has been around awhile and is the only one in town who does this surgery robotically.  I have an appointment with him next week also for his opinion.”

“It’s all going to work out, no matter what it’s you and me together.  I have to get back to work and I know you do to, I just wanted to stop in and see how you were doing.”

“Thank you, Baby, I appreciate it so much.  I love you.”

“Love you too Sweetheart.  I will see you at home tonight”

When you weren’t at work, you and Dean hung out at home over the weekend.  He did his best to take his mind off of your upcoming appointment.  You greatly appreciated his effort.  Before you knew it, Tuesday afternoon rolled around.  This time dean accompanied you to the appointment.  The doctor explained that the fibroid was now at 6.7cm and was what was causing your problems.  He was really pushing these shots you take once a month that put you in menopause for six months. He told you that it would shrink the fibroid, and that would be best to start with.  The other options he was giving you were waiting and getting another ultrasound end of December/early January and coming back then or go in and do surgery sometime. You weren’t sure how you felt about either of those options but were glad he wasn’t going in right away to take out the uterus.  What did frustrate you the most, was how the call on Friday made it sound like things were worse and you needed to come in asap for something to be done, and the doctor wasn’t doing anything right now.

You and Dean both felt a little calmer when you left the office.  “What are you thinking about your options, Darling?”

“Honestly, I’m not so sure about those shots, I would need a lot more information on them first. The whole being put into menopause has me nervous.  That’s not something I ever thought I would be thinking about at 31.  When I talked to the nurse on the phone Friday she made this seem so much worse, and he’s not doing anything other than the shots now. I guess we’ll see what the other doctor says tomorrow.”

The next morning you and Dean were at the other doctor’s office.  New patient paperwork all filled out and you were waiting to go back. Your cousin’s friend called your name and took you back.  She had been talking to your mom, so she knew what was going on and had shared it with the doctor.  You asked her opinion on the shots, and she just shook her head.  She told you there wasn’t any guarantee it would even work, and there was a lot of risk with what going into menopause could do to you and your chance of having a child.  You would have to sign a number of documents that said you didn’t hold that company responsible for any of the large number of side effects.

“I wasn’t sold on them before, I’m really not know” you told her and Dean.

The doctor came in shortly after and did quick exam.  You had asked his opinion on what to do, he said taking it out would be the best thing to try and preserve the uterus and a chance for you to have children in the future. Yes, you could have a child with a fibroid on the uterus, but as big as it was it could cause problems. It didn’t end up being a long appointment because he was called away for a birth. He did order 2 tests and you set those up before leaving.  One was another ultrasound to check where the fibroid was and if that would cause any problems itself. The other was to check the uterus for any cancer spots, they did warn you that one could be painful, and you weren’t going to want to do much after the test was done. You had those both scheduled for the following Tuesday and Wednesday.

As you walked out to your cars you asked Dean “What did you think of him, and everything said?”

“They are both pretty against the shots, and I know you didn’t really like the idea of them either. You cousin said he has more experience, right?”

“Yes, he does. I’ve talked to a few others that know him, and they all like him.  Donna’s aunt was an OB and she referred patients to him if it was something she couldn’t do.”

“Ultimately Y/N, it comes down to what you think, and what you want to do.  We can talk more at home on your thoughts and see what these tests say.  I will support your decision no matter what.”

“Thank you, Babe. I love you.  Have a great day at work.”

“I love you too. I hope you have a great one as well.”

You were talking to Donna at work about everything that you had found out.  She had spent a little time working in her aunt’s office and at one point had been premed in school, you valued her opinion.

“You need to get it taken out girly, it’s already grown a lot on you.  I know how much you and Dean want kids.  If you wait too long you run the risk of losing that chance.”

“Part of me knows that, but the other part of me is worried about what is going to happen during surgery.”

“That’s understandable, any surgery there is a risk.  This doctor has done thousands of these, you’ll be fine, most importantly you’ll be better. Don’t ignore this, Dean and you can adopt if you can’t have kids, Dean won’t be fine if he loses you.  Don’t do those shots, there is a lot of risk with those, and you could run into even more problems.”

“Those shots are pretty much off the table, I really don’t like the idea of them.  I know your right, a part of me just really doesn’t want more surgery.  The last week the pain has gotten worse so I don’t know that I can put this off.”

“I know Sweetie, surgery makes anyone nervous.  This will all work out.”

“Thanks, Donna, you are an amazing friend.”

After dinner that night you and Dean were sitting in the living room and you decided you weren’t going to think about any medical issues.  While he had the game on you grabbed your computer and recipe binder. Settling next to Dean on the couch you pulled up Pinterest and Christmas recipe ideas. You had been scrolling for a few minutes when Dean looked over at your screen.

“What are you looking up Christmas for?”

“Mom and Dad’s Christmas party is a month from tomorrow, and I need to get my baking list around.”

“What do you mean a month away, that’s before Thanksgiving?”

“With Thanksgiving being so late this year, they are doing it the Saturday before.  That way it has less chance running into other Holiday parties.  You don’t want to do it Thanksgiving weekend, and then there are only three other weekends before Christmas and there will be a bit going on.  So I need to figure out what’s on my baking list this year, what’s staying, what I’m adding.”

“It’s too early to talk Christmas.”

“Hallmark starts Christmas movies this weekend, Saturday has some of my favorites we can watch after work!”    

“It’s not even Halloween Y/N, I’m not watching Christmas movies!” Dean threw his head back against the couch turning slightly to glare at you.

“You say that now, we’ll see what happens when I get that remote,” you smirked.  “I could happily watch them year-round.”

“Ehh, your getting better with that.  You used to be into Christmas songs and movies 361, the couple days leading up to Christmas Eve and sometimes that morning you were a little bah humbug saying you were done with all of it.  Then the day after Christmas you start singing Frosty again.”

You just glared at him for a minute, “It was the stress, and trying to get everything just right and make everyone happy.  My shopping will be done, before 2 days before Christmas this year.  I’m going to enjoy it, no stress.”

“Sure thing, Sweetheart, whatever you say.  We’ll see how you are on December 23rd.”

“Going back to the Holiday of the month we are actually in, Sam wanted to know if we wanted to come over Thursday night.  See Jake in his first Halloween costume, hand out candy to the Trick-or-Treaters.  Mom and dad are going to be there too.”

“Sure I’m in. It’s usually a busy night for us so I will be over after I can leave work.”

“Okay so we have my usual baking items: Sugar cookies I  think I’m going to keep it simple and just do drop cookies instead of cut outs, buckeyes, peanut butter blossoms, no bakes, petit-fours, truffles, cranberry bars and the varieties of chocolates those I’ll make with mom. Now I need to figure out some new ones. Hey what do you think about, hey, where are you going?”

“I need a beer if we are going to talk about your crazy Christmas baking list.”

You waited for Dean to settle back next to you to show him your finds.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/174584923042596801/

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/174584923042596805/

“You’re on a Grinch kick this year aren’t you? You mentioned a few weeks ago you wanted a Grinch sweatshirt this year.”

“Maybe, part of me is. Anyways thoughts? What about these?” https://www.pinterest.com/pin/174584923042556919/

“Ooohhhh, Do you think I could make these?” https://www.pinterest.com/pin/174584923040748115/

“We aren’t going to be using our kitchen to make actual food anytime soon are we?  I love you and you are very talented when it comes to your baking but I don’t know if you have the patience for those cupcakes.”

“You’re probably right, it does tend to run thinner when I’m trying to get all this stuff done. Look on the bright side, the party is early this year so I will have the kitchen back to normal sooner.”

“Sureee you will.”

You weren’t going to admit it to Dean right now, but you were trying to force yourself into the Holiday spirit. With everything going on you weren’t sure you were going to be in the celebrating mood this year.  You knew how much he loved the Holiday, and the time with family together. You would put on a happy face for him.

Dean took you to your appointment Tuesday afternoon, because they didn’t recommend driving after since you were going to be in a bit of pain.  It wasn’t even a five minute test to go take a swab of the uterus lining to send in to check for abnormal or cancer cells. They were right though, you definitely hurt after.  You and Dean picked up food on the way home so neither of you would have to cook or clean up. He got you situated on the couch with a heating pad after you got home. You two spent another quiet night in.  The next afternoon you took yourself to your ultrasound.  The results for both tests would be back in time for your appointment the following Tuesday.  

Thursday was Halloween, and you were short handed at work again, but not as busy as you were expecting to be.  You left around 7 and headed over to Sam and Jess’ house.  5-month-old Jake was dressed up in a cute duck onesie.  After saying hi to the couple, your husband, and his parents you grabbed some food and settled down with Jake.  You were told you just missed Cas, his wife Kelly, and their son Jack. The one year old getting cranky and ready for bed.  Jess and Mary joined you shortly.  The guys were watching one of the All Saint’s Day movies.  Apparently having a little one to get excited about put Sam in a better Halloween mood then he usually was in.  Mary asked how you were doing; Dean had apparently told her a few days before and Jess had just found out tonight.

“I’m alright, it’s been going on over a month and I think at this point I want a plan.  I want to know what’s going to happen.  But I want to make sure that we decide on the right course of action too.”

Both ladies assured you they thought you would be fine, and that everything would work out for you. Your attention turning to the little boy on the floor in front of you.

You spent your weekend working and had started some grocery shopping for you baking supplies.  Those supplies then found a home on your kitchen counter.  So Dean was right, he was slowing losing the kitchen for a little while.

Tuesday afternoon saw you and Dean back in your new doctor’s office waiting to be called back.  It wasn’t a long wait and you headed back. Thankful your tests had come back normal and the new ultrasound didn’t show any new problems.  Because of the last surgery you had there was to much scar tissue in your abdomen for the surgery to be done robotically, and the fibroid was too big.  You did have the option for another procedure, he described it as resetting your uterus.  He did tell you it wouldn’t do anything for the fibroid, but it could get your periods back under control and might lesson some pain, you would need a few days off work. The best chance you had if you wanted to get pregnant sometime was to have the fibroid removed.  Now you just needed to make a decision on what you were going to do.  You were leaning toward surgery and when you didn’t make a definitive decision the doctor told you to come back in 2 weeks.  When you were checking out and scheduling the next appointment you asked how far out the wait for surgery was. His calendar was filling up and he only had December 9th and 23rd open.

On your way home you and Dean talked about what you both were thinking.  You told him you were leaning toward surgery, and he also thought that would be your best choice.  Now you just weren’t sure you really wanted to wait.  If you called your first doctor, he could do the surgery in two weeks, he just had to wait for insurance purposes.  Honestly, he was never busy. That put you the day before your parents Christmas party or waiting till the next weekend which was the day after Thanksgiving.  Another problem you had was making sure you had help at work. Right now, you didn’t have the help to do it.  If you pushed it too far into December it was going to be a problem with your foot surgery.  They had said with your stomach because they were cutting it open you would need to be careful not to tear your stitches for a few weeks and be limited for 6 weeks with what you could do. Crutches weren’t going to be a good thing to mix in.  

Your parents, you and Dean all talked.  You didn’t have the help to do the surgery in November, December wasn’t a good idea because of your next surgery.  You decided if the doctor thought you could wait you would do the foot surgery in January and then six weeks later when you should be able to start putting some pressure on your foot you would have the other.  That way the six weeks you needed to be careful with the second surgery would be ending in time for therapy in May.  Work was going to be getting better help wise because you were selling on of your locations.  The gas station next door to one of them wanted to expand and the only way they could was if they bought your property.  That deal was supposed to close first of January. Your foot surgery was scheduled for the 16th.  Things seemed to fall in to place for that all to work out.

You still weren’t feeling the best, but you were glad to have noticed you didn’t have the pain in your side and stomach every day anymore.  It had turned into just having really bad periods every few weeks.

When you went to your appointment two weeks later you went alone and talked to the doctor about your thoughts and timeline. He didn’t think that would be a problem, telling you before he left that removing it was your best option.  They weren’t’ scheduling yet for February or March so they would call you when those books opened.

If you were honest, you were feeling better with what you had decided on.  Also, the fact that no one was worried enough to say you had to get in right now for surgery.  You were still going to worry between now and surgery it was just who you were.  

It was the third week of November, your new focus on the upcoming Holidays.  You had already started your baking, freezing everything once it was made cooled and put in an airtight container. The list was still shorter this year it only had about 15 things on it.  You didn’t get the Grinch recipes made, or the snow globe cupcakes, but you did make the thumb print snowmen. Next year.  Two days before the party you moved on from baking to getting the food you were doing around.  In between all this also trying to help your mom decorate their house and putting decorations up at yours.  You didn’t end up doing as much to your house as you usually would, but just less to take down after and you knew things would be crazy then.  

The day of the party both you and your mom ended up being stuck at work longer than you were supposed to be.  This meant you had to work quicker when you got home.  Dean went to your parents with you to help with the last minute set up. It was nice living on the same street as them, so you didn’t have far to go.  With the final cleaning finished you were in the kitchen with Dean starting to get food around while your mom ran upstairs to shower.  Your brother and his girlfriend coming shortly after.  They had been dating for almost a year, but she didn’t come around much, so you didn’t know her well.  Trying to ask her questions about herself didn’t get you very far because she only gave one-word answers.  You looked to Dean and he just shrugged his shoulders, not knowing how to get much out of her either.  When your mom came back down, and the food was in good shape you and dean went home to get ready and get the desserts.

You always enjoyed this party it was family from both of your parent’s sides, Dean’s family started coming when you two were dating. A variety of your parent’s friends along with your brother’s and yours. You were surprised to see more cars in the driveway when you returned. Cas, Benny and Kelly were in the kitchen talking to your dad and brother, along with one of his old friends from school. It didn’t take long for the house to fill up with people and the sounds of laughter.  It was close to one by the time you and Dean went home after helping to clean up.  You were beat and ready to fall into bed, Dean not far behind.

The restaurant you were selling, was the store you spent every day at, it had been your baby over the last 8 years.  Since you were going to be closing it soon you had cut back on the Sunday hours which meant you and Dean could enjoy a lazy morning after the party. It was nice not to get up and go, you had missed the relaxing mornings you two used to enjoy. When you finally dragged yourselves from bed it was to the kitchen to make a late breakfast of eggs, bacon and toast. You would have to head in to work after lunch, but that didn’t mean you had to be in a hurry to get ready.  After cleaning up the kitchen Dean dragged you back to the bedroom where you spent a little more time catching up.

That week was Thanksgiving which meant a shorter work week for you both.  Thursday morning started off much like Sunday’s had, although you both had to be out the door by noon and have your food and deserts ready. A late lunch with your family at your grandmother’s house was first.  The Y/L/N could be a rowdy group, so it was usually a good time as long as you could avoid any family arguments.  After cleaning up there you would head to Dean’s parents where they had an early dinner. You tried not to eat too much at either place for two reasons, one you wanted to be able to move later and two you were trying to avoid being sick.  It didn’t hit you as much as before, but you never knew when it would.  After the guys collapsed in front of the football game on tv, Mary and Jess hit the adds. You left to go pick up your mom.  The last two years you to had done some Thursday evening shopping because you both worked on Friday, and it gave you time just he two of you.  You hit the mall and a few stores trying to start on your shopping list.  You meant it when you told Dean that everything was going to be done early this year. You were going to enjoy the Holiday season.  When you finished you dropped her back at home before going back to your in-laws. A short time later you and Dean headed home.

Much like it does every year December flies by.  You hadn’t finished your shopping as early as you wanted, but you weren’t as stressed about it this year.  You enjoyed nights with Dean curled up on the couch.  You had seen the Grinch more times than you could count this year, I guess you were having a Grinchy year.  Before you knew it, Christmas Eve was here.  Both you and Dean worked that morning before meeting your families at church for the 4 o’clock service.  You had to go early if you wanted a park, and a seat.  It was always so beautifully decorated for Christmas, you enjoyed taking it all in waiting for Mass to start. One of your favorite parts of this service was when Father would call any little kids up that wanted to and ask them questions about the religious aspects of the holiday. Where was Jesus born?  Your favorite answer this year was Baltimore. What gifts did the baby receive? Cake and ice cream.  The answers they came up with were always a laugh.  You hoped you would be sending your own child up there someday.

Everyone headed to your parents’ house after, some other family and friends would be joining you. You had dinner and then played games. As you and your cousins had grown so had the games.  Jake was the only child present and he wasn’t old enough to understand what was going on. With all the adults playing it could get a little rowdy especially between Sam and Dean.  One of your aunts had done that gifts wrapped in a saran wrap ball and it seemed like only those two could make much progress.  So of course, when one of them was trying to unwrap the other would give a little trash talk.  You had been feeling a little off and would disappear from the room.  When the ball was unwrapped, and Dean saw you left again he came to find you.  He found you sitting on the steps just outside your parents’ upstairs bathroom.

“Everything all right, Sweetheart?”

“Not really, my stomach is hurting me a bit and if I try to eat or drink I’m running to the restroom because it’s going to make a reappearance.”

“Anything I can do to make it better?”

“Thank you, but no I just need to tough it out.”

“Soon Y/N this is all going to be behind you honey.”

“I cannot wait.”

He held you close as you both sat on the steps for a few minutes softly kissing the top of your head.  When you rejoined your family, they were on to a different game.  The two of you hanging back to watch.  When the time came to leave you were more than ready to head home just so Dean could hold you in bed.  You fell into a fitful sleep that night, not feeling all that much better when you awoke.

The two of you were spending the morning at your mom and dad’s and then going to John and Mary’s in the afternoon. Your dad’s mom and siblings joined you for breakfast and afterwards you exchanged gifts.  Luckily, you only had to leave the room once.  Dean knew you weren’t feeling well so the two of you left shortly after to go home before heading to his parent’s house. When you arrived, you headed to the kitchen to help Mary.  The two of you got along really well, you often considered yourself luck in that way. A few of your friends didn’t have the best relationship with their in-laws. By the time Sam and Jess arrived dinner was ready, and you all gathered round the table to enjoy. It was a great night spent with them.

The end of December was quickly approaching, and you hadn’t heard anything from the company buying your story, communication had just stopped.  After you talked to your dad, he started making phone calls to the company again to see what was going on.  Their plans for the property and been pushed back a few months so they were no longer in a hurry to close. You ended up pushing your foot surgery back there weeks till the 6th of February.  Your dad finally got a date out of them you were closing on Monday the 3rd of February, that would also be the last day open.  You would spend the next two days moving everything out. The New Year wasn’t even here yet and you knew it was going to be going fast.  

Things were going to get busy for you in January, so you and Dean decided you just wanted a quiet night in for New Year’s.  At the store you picked up a bottle of Sparkling Cider to toast with, neither one of you big Champagne drinkers, along with a few different appetizers to make.  The evening was spent curled up on the couch watching movies, until you switched over to watch the ball drop. Sharing a sweet kiss with Dean when midnight arrived.  This was going to be your year.  The surgeries would be done soon, you and Dean could move on with the rest of your lives, it was all going to work out and be fine.

You had been right when you told Dean January would be crazy.  You spent the month working on cleaning out things at work.  The office took a bit of time, dividing up what was going home and what you were sending to your new office.   Cleaning out things you didn’t use any more, what you were selling and what was moving to the other location.  On top of all that you were trying to keep a relatively clean house and not let everything there fall on Dean’s shoulders. Everyday it seemed like a little bit more left the store and the shelves were slowly becoming bare.

Sunday through Wednesday of closing week was going to be extremely chaotic for you all, so you wanted things at home that needed to be done before surgery finished by Saturday. You cleaned the house top to bottom, rearranged the living room furniture so it would be easier to navigate on crutches, got the crutches ready,  finished laundry and tried to stock up on non-perishable groceries so Dean wouldn’t have to go out as much.  

The last two days you were open were particularly emotional for you.  This location had been your baby and second home for the last 8 years, you had helped with the cleaning, gutting, and remodeling of the building when you bought it.  Everything was set up just how you wanted it.  When you went back to work in a few months at the other location it was going to be vastly different.  Sitting at the closing you were trying to hold back the tears as you signed the papers, part of you wished Dean was there to give you some of his strength but he had to be at the shop that day since he was taking the next 3 days off.  Leaving the closing you went to work to open for the last time.  That day was extremely busy for your and Donna so many of your loyal customers coming in one last time.  Dean came in for a late lunch giving you a much-needed hug, he left after promising to be back before closing.  Dean along with your parents came back before closing helping you to clean up and finish making orders.  When you turned the open sign off one last time Dean pulled you into his arms and held you while you cried.

“It’s okay Sweetheart. It’s the start of a new chapter, you have a lot of memories to take with you.”

“Thanks, Dean. I know, I just hate goodbyes, and change.”

“I know you do, but it’s a good one.  Keep telling yourself that.  Closing this story is going to help greatly relieve some stress.”

“You’re right, Babe.”

“Hey! I’m always right. We should probably head home; we have an early busy day tomorrow.”

It was six am when you and Dean pulled back into the parking lot the next day.  You had wanted a few minutes without the others around to take care of some of your stuff.  By 6:30 someone was there to disconnect the water lines so the pop dispenser and ice machine could be moved.  Your parents arrived at 7 and you started loading both of their trucks and the trailer with items going to the other store.  Sam arrived and went with Dean in one of the trucks following your mom to go unload. Electricians, and others arrived to get the oven and its components unhooked.  You had gone around the day before and put a note on everything stating where it was going, whether the other store, your or your parents’ house for storage, staying in the building or going somewhere and you just didn’t know where yet.  The movers were the last to arrive taking some of the bigger equipment for you, this way you guys didn’t have to figure out how to get it on and off a trailer.  Dean and Sam arrived back to help load the truck and your SUV. At one-point Dean took one of the “going somewhere” notes and tapped it to your back.  It was awhile and two stops later before anyone told you. It was 6 o’clock that night when you put the last load in your car to leave for the day, heading home to unload one more time.  By the time it was unloaded your foot hurt so bad you could barely walk, both you and Dean collapsing on the couch not moving till you went to bed.

The next day you had a few more things to get out of the store and had to meet the pop company to pick up their equipment since they couldn’t come the previous day.  You left the store that afternoon for the final time. Your OB and scheduled one last ultrasound you had to run and get that done, thankfully the fibroid had not changed from your last one in December. One more grocery store run to stock up for a bit, then home to vacuum and make sure you were all packed for the hospital.  

Both your mom and Dean were going with you for surgery, but Dean had an early morning meeting the next day he couldn’t reschedule so your mom was staying the night in the hospital and bringing you home the next day.  It was an hour drive and you had to be there at 6:30 for an 8:30 surgery. You went through all your pre-op things and your mom and Dean joined you back there waiting for you to go.  Several people were in and out of your little curtain room, the surgeon, anesthesiologist, nurses, and med students.  It was finally time to wheel you back after getting one last hug and kiss from Dean and him telling you everything would be fine.  A few hours later you woke up in recovery which is where you saw Dean and your mom again.  It is also where you found out they didn’t have a room for you, and you were staying in a short-term patient ward.  It was almost like a pre-op room, one giant room with 15 curtained off rooms.  Actually, the pre-op room was bigger.  There was a bed a chair and one of the old hospital TVs that moved.  The back of your foot where they did the heal work was bleeding through your after surgery splint and they said it would take a few hours to stop so they propped it up and told you, you couldn’t get out of bed. It only took a few hours for you to be tired of sitting in one spot, as someone who spent all day on her feet this was a struggle.  Sleeping in a hospital had never come easy for you with your previous surgeries and adding all the extra noise with so many people around that wasn’t happening either.  It was later in the afternoon when you told Dean he should go.

“Babe, you might as well head home, you have an hour drive and there isn’t anything you can do here. Plus, there really isn’t any room in here.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to leave if you need me.”

“We will be fine, I’m not moving, and mom will be here if I need something.  Go home get some rest it’s been a long week.  I love you I’ll see you at home tomorrow.”

“Love you too, I’ll call you later. Take care Sweetheart. Y/M/N, call me if you need something or anything.” He gave you a kiss and hugged your mom before leaving.

The rest of the evening and night dragged on, when you finally fell asleep that night you woke up almost every half and hour. The nurses were in every hour, and around 2am one of the other patients started screaming because he pulled something out he shouldn’t have.  By 5 am you gave up on sleep.  One of the doctors came in later in the morning to wrap another layer of gauze around your splint to cover up the blood, and by noon they let you go home.  

The next two weeks went fairly quickly, Dean made a good nurse when he was home at night getting you whatever you needed so you didn’t have to get up or try and carry anything while using the crutches.  You had practiced on the crutches before surgery, but it is still a little different when you have to be using them.  As your family knew well, you were also accident prone and managed to slip and slam your foot down a handful of times.  Both your parents, and his would stop over during the day to see if you needed anything or to bring you lunch.   The stitches and staples came out at the two-week mark, that wasn’t a fun experience you had never had it hurt as much as it did this time.  The doctor wasn’t putting you in a cast, he was going to let you leave in a boot which you would be able to take off if you were sitting with it up or to shower.  Thank you for small miracles!  The next appointment was four weeks away, the Friday before your Monday surgery.

The next month went fine for you, just very long.  You were still stuck at home so things did get a bit boring, a number of new games could be found on your phone and you found a website with fanfiction from your favorite show you started reading.  While fine for you, things were going nuts in the outside world, something called Covid-19 was making a lot of people extremely sick, overseas countries shut down and in the U.S., many states were doing the same thing.  Your follow up appointment was cancelled and moved to a video chat, then days before it was scheduled your next surgery was cancelled.  Stay at home orders were put in place and masks were required for those who had to leave the house.  

It was definitely a crazy time and it went on for a few months.  6 weeks after you last video appointment,  during the first full week of May, you had another and this one sent you to therapy if you could find someone open.  You could also lose the boot and work on losing the crutches. The place you had gone for past surgeries was open and you started back there.  This surgery was the hardest time you had to start walking again.  There was a bit of pain if your heel hit the ground, so you couldn’t completely get rid of the crutches like you wanted to.  The therapist you were working with said with the type of surgery done to your heel, the pain you had with it would determine what you could do and how fast you would get there.  

You got a call from your OB’s office, they were given the clear to start surgeries again and yours was scheduled for June 1st, which was two weeks away.  You had had a few problems over the last couple of months and just hoped nothing had changed and they would be able to just go in and take the fibroid out no problem.  The closer the date got the more worried you became.  Dean tried to tell you everything was going to be fine, and not to worry, but you aren’t the best listener.  Because of things going on with Covid, you needed to be home the week before surgery as much as possible only going to therapy twice and the grocery store once early in the week to get a few things you wanted.  For the last three months Dean had done the shopping, and you were thankful, but there were a few things you wanted to get yourself.  Saturday you were going to have to get a Covid test and then had to self-isolate until you left for the hospital on Monday morning.  The hardest part of that was going to be sleeping in a different room from Dean, you were even supposed to wear a mask when he was in the same room as you.  You had spent the week before rearranging the living room again, then cleaning the house best you could as you hobbled around. Friday night you spent the evening with Dean curled up in your spots on the couch.  The closer you got to surgery the more nervous you became.      

“Sweetheart, everything is going to go just fine.  There is nothing for you to worry about, and no matter how much you worry it isn’t going to change anything.”

“I know, I’m just, I can’t help it.  You know how my mind works I’m great at going to the worse case possible. I’ve always wanted kids, and I know you did too, I’m afraid I’m not going to be able to give that to you.”

“Hey, it’s you and me no matter what happens.  If we can have kids one day awesome, if not we will look into adopting.  What’s not changing is you and me, we are in this together, always.”

“I love you.  Thanks for being so amazing, especially during these last crazy months when I couldn’t do much on my own.”

“I love you, too. That’s what I’m here for, you would do the same thing for me.  You always take care of me when I’m sick.  I will always be here for you.”

“I will always be here for you too.”

Saturday morning you did a few more things around the house before giving Dean a kiss and leaving for your test.  It went fairly quick your doctor’s office scheduled you an appointment and you preregistered. You headed home to work on laundry and make sure you bag was packed. That evening you and Dean were watching movies in the living room, although unlike usual you weren’t sitting together on the couch.  Sunday was a warm sunny day, so you enjoyed it outside. Monday morning Dean took you to the hospital, you went through check in and then through the routine in pre-op.  Just before they took you back you snuck in a quick hug and kiss from Dean.  

“I love you, Baby, everything is going to be just fine.  I will talk to you after surgery.”

“I love you too, thank you for everything.”

“You don’t have to thank me for anything.  We are in this together.  Love you Sweetheart.”

Dean was able to stay at the hospital during surgery, but he had to leave after. They weren’t allowing visitors into the hospital, so you were going to be on your own in the hospital for the next three days. Dean headed to the waiting room and they came to wheel you back to surgery.  Well, here goes nothing. 

Part 2

[stuckonvenus]

𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 » Ellie & Becca

 Ｊｕｌｙ ３１ｓｔ， １９９８

The saying goes as such: the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb... or whatever. Honestly I have only ever applied this proverb to my relationship with my sister whenever we weren’t in mortal peril. While I have plenty of friends and acquaintances who I’ve shared battlefields with (i.e. the morning after a party), that never made me any closer to them in a real crisis. I would say about seventy-five percent of the time that the blood is thicker than the water, and the remaining twenty-five percent is when the water isn’t necessarily thicker, but more pressurized. That’s the only time in our lives when we’ve ever come together as sisters.

Well, this is the twenty five percent, and never has the feeling of being sucked and trapped against a fissure at the bottom of the Challenger Deep been more realized than now. It doesn’t help that my bladder is about to implode and leak the citrus-flavored toxic waste I’ve consumed in rapid succession over the past half hour into my visceral fat and contaminate all my vital organs. 

I waddle awkwardly through the narrow doorway of Page One and slam my tiny palm onto the countertop. A bookkeeper who I can recognize as my lab partner from sophomore year chemistry pokes his nose out from the novel he’s immersed in. Moby Dick. Jesus, who reads school assigned books after graduation?

“Hey, Drew-Drew,” I greet him, a lopsided grin fitted on my lips as he brushes his hair out of his eyes and offers me a smile in return. He has a lot more charisma than I remember. I think his eyes have gotten bigger and bluer, too. It reminds me of the water’s surface I’m staring up at from the very bottom of the ocean. “Where’s Becky at?”

Drew dog-ears his page — which is kind of disgusting to me, do they not sell bookmarks in this busted ass joint? — and he points toward the graphic novel section. “Over there, we just got Spider-Man #76, she’s stocking up.”

“... Didn’t #76 come out in January? Of last year?” I ask him. He opens his mouth so he can answer but I stop him with a raised hand. “No time. You’re lookin’ good, Drew-Drew, considerably less like a delicious pepperoni pizza. Keep it up with the Oxy Pads.” I say before pushing away from the counter and venturing off to my destination.

Indeed, my older sister is crouched down and rustling with a display, slightly disgruntled by the symmetry of the copies of Spider-Man she’s stocking. I don’t really have any witty remarks as a smooth enough introduction, so I settle with, “Need help?”

She whips around and I can almost hear the crack in her spinal cord from the velocity. “Lily?” she half-whispers. I forget that I haven’t seen her since late May, and also that I swore I’d never see her again.

“In the flesh,” I confirm and do a curtsey, which threatens my full bladder. I really need to piss soon or else I’ll die a terribly death in the shittiest bookstore on the eastern seaboard. “Do you have a sec? It’s 9-1-1.”

Becca’s expression shifts from awe and minor annoyance to something resembling concern as she pushes herself off her knees. “What is it?” she asks me, crossing her arms over her chest as a last resort defense mechanism. 

I don’t hesitate to hold up the plastic Walgreens bag I’ve carted with me for two blocks. She recognizes the items inside and her eyes go all moony and her jaw slacks a bit. I jerk my brows up expectantly and she assumes the position of utter bewilderment.

“Do you have a place I can empty the biohazardous contents of my bladder? It’s about to necrotize,” I hiss at her. She reaches down, digs in her pocket, unearths a bronze key and walks ahead of me at full speed. I have to waddle after her like a newly hatched penguin chick. It would be more humiliating if over half the population of Eden were literate, but alas...

Becca jams the keys into the lock and just about bodychecks the door so we can enter the rectangular bathroom. It’s cramped and the lighting resembles something out of a Hitchcock film, but who the fuck am I to be picky about where I take the most important whizz of my life?

I place the bag on the counter and take out the three empty full-sized cans of Surge I used to fuel my bladder before picking up the grossest thing I have ever held: a pregnancy test. I keep it in my grasp for a few passing beats, nearly crushing the box underneath my iron-tight grip before man-handling it open and tearing out the plastic stick that will determine my fate.

“This is by far the most unholy fortune telling experience ever,” I decide to joke as I witness my sister cower in the corner. You’d think by the looks of it she were the one whose life was about to change forever. “You think if I shake it a genie will come out and grant me three wishes?”

“... Only if it’s negative, as a gift,” Becca chimes in at last. “Otherwise not even God can save you.”

I let out an involuntary snort, because while my reflexes register this as a funny joke, I am actually scared shitless.

I stare at the porcelain toilet bowl. I feel sicker now looking at it than when I’ve genuinely been at risk for vomiting up my lunch. I could still do that, I’ve been puking like a bulimic for weeks now. The thought is almost comforting. Almost. I bite the bullet instead and yank my pants down, my boy pants, which I normally wear as a boy when I’ve got slightly wider hips and more junk to hide and taller legs to protect with denim fabric. Fuck me.

“I just... Hold it and piss, right?” I ask her, as if she’s gone through this before. I know for a fact she hasn’t, or else this wouldn’t be our first time. I’m surprised it’s our first time, actually, thinking that karma would’ve caught up with me a long time ago. 

“Just don’t get any on your hand.” Becca replies. Very helpful, I think, but rather than respond verbally I give a sigh of defeat and do what needs to be done. When my bladder is emptied an eternity later, I pull up my oversized pants and briefly grieve my dick before I place the test on the counter.

I glance over my shoulder at Becca, “It’s seasoned. Just gotta let it marinate.”

“Gross.” she says with a scrunched up nose.

I turn around and slide down the wall, an action she mimics a couple seconds later. I stare ahead, up at the light that’s screwed into a 70s pendant-shaped fixture, and pass the silence by making them flicker. I do this as a distraction from the materializing tension between us. Normally, this doesn’t happen, but then again our peril has only involved either extreme intoxication, pedos on AOL (during high school), or something about her and Gabriel’s arguments, which felt like walking through Reactor 4 in Chernobyl.

She’s the first one to say something.

“Whose is it? ... If it’s a thing,” she wonders, and as I look over at her I notice that her eyebrows are knitted together and her mouth is fixed downward. “... Please don’t tell me Topher’s.”

I chuckle at the idea. “I think if it were a thing and Topher’s, it’d have grown like a xenomorph baby and ripped itself out of my stomach by now,” I tell her. “I’d deserve that kind of karma for getting knocked up by him.”

“Xenomorph?” she says, and I open my mouth to offer an explanation before she finishes, “Alien. Right.”

“... Yeah, exactly,” I nod along. How in the hell did she remember that? We only ever sat through Alien and Aliens once, and I could’ve sworn she was too preoccupied reading a magazine to actually notice what was happening on screen. 

I also notice that she’s wearing my favorite striped turtleneck. Stone cold bitch.

Some things never change, huh?

Shit, I think I might cry.

This is why we’re siblings, I think, so I can hate her for wearing my favorite turtleneck while sitting by her side as we await Satan’s final decision on the state of my cursed uterus.

Tears prickle my vision but I blink them away. 

“Whose is it, then?” she wonders again. I visibly tense. This is probably where our unspoken, once-in-a-blue-moon loyalties end. How do you tell your sister that her ex-boyfriend is the reason you’re sitting in the dingy bathroom of her workplace with a piss-riddled stick inches away?

In the end, I don’t have to say anything at all. We look at each other simultaneously and she reads my expression with ease. Her features soften and I can see a glint of hurt in her eyes, and I expect ripples of betrayal to make themselves known across the rest of her body soon enough. But those ripples never come. The water I thought was loosening from around me doesn’t make a goddamn move. 

I’m still at the bottom of the Deep, but she’s with me now.

Her hand grips mine. Tight. I can feel our pulses match up in our paralleling wrists.

“I think it’s been enough time.” I say eventually. She doesn’t release my hand. Our shared warmth creates a comfortable friction between us. “... Will you hate me after this?”

Becca squeezes my hand. A heart beat jumps out from her touch to mine. “I think I’ve hated you enough for one summer.”

A smile flickers on the corner of my lips and I slowly depart my hand from hers. My palm is slick with sweat but I don’t mind. I stand up and feel my equilibrium struggle to steady itself before I’m ready to approach the counter. The test is still there, so I know this wasn’t an abstract fever dream I’ve had after discovering so much eerily similar history.

I’m not a fucking coward. I’m looking this shit straight on, no matter what. Do you think I’m afraid of a sign? Totally not. I lean over and stare down, my gaze idling at the base before finally fixating on the panel.

+

Holy shitstickers.

“... Becca?” I call out, my voice half gone from unknown forces. She perks up and I see her reflection in the mirror with widened eyes. “Do you have five bucks? I’m gonna need more Surge.”

[renee-writer]

Son of a Preacher Chapter 12 First GYN Appointment

AO3

She scans through a magazine, not seeing it. Yes, she wants this. Yes, it is needed. Yes, it is the responsible adult thing to do. But, she is glad her mum sits besides her. Julia looks over at her daughter. She was as nervous as she was. It is a big step from childhood to adulthood, this first GYN appointment.

 

“Claire Beauchamp?” Her eyes dart to her mum.

 

“I am right here baby. Come on.” They follow the nurse out. First is the familiar things. Weight, height, vitals.  They are then directed to an exam room where Claire is asked to strip down from the waist down and offered a paper sheet to cover with.

 

“Is this supposed to cover me?” she asked Julia as she tries to wrap herself up in it. Her mum laughs

 

“No, it just offers the illusion of a cover.”

 

“It will get worse before it gets better, won’t it?” Her mum has time to nod before the doctor walks in.

 

“Miss Claire, I see this is your first exam?”

 

“Yes ma’am. I wish to be put on birth control and…”

 

“A smart responsible lass. I have a few questions.”

 

“Yes ma’am.” She squirms, trying to get the paper sheet to cover more of her.

 

“Horrid things, aren’t they?” she nods to the sheet. Claire nods back with a smile. “Claire are still a virgin?”

 

A blush raises across her face. “Yes. We are waiting until I am fully covered, oh, and we will still use condoms.”

 

“I am impressed Claire. Quite impressed. Brilliant plan. Okay. I need to exam you to make sure all is healthy. As you will be sexually active.” Her blush raises higher. “I will need to see you once a year for this same exam. I will be checking the end of your vagina, your cervix. To get access to it, I will be opening you up with this.” She holds up the speculum. “It will be warm and I will use some lubricant to make it as comfortable as possible. I will take a sample of your cervix to check for signs of cervical cancer, not that I expect to find any. It is called a pap smear and we will do it at every visit.” She takes a breath.

 

“I will also feel you uterus from the inside. I need to know if you want your hymen cut. I can avoid it if you want to remain a technical virgin.”

 

“I think I want the whole experience. So, can we leave it?”

 

“We can.” She looks to Julia. The mum nods. “Is this to prove to the boy that you’re a virgin?”

 

“No, he is too. We will be each other’s first. This is because he is the only one I will ever want and he should be the one that makes me not a virgin, in everyway.” The doctor starts to say something but her mum is shaking her head. Okay then.

 

“Alright. Are you ready?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Okay, bring your bum down to me.” She guides her feet into the stirrups.  “a bit more. Good. Now, I am going to open you up.” She reaches out and Julia takes her hand. It reminds her of the time she first got stitches at five. She had done the same, reached for her mum. Now… no she wasn’t to cry. Not yet. Claire needs her.

 

“A bit of pressure.”  Claire closes her eyes and breathes out as the speculum is inserted.  “A small pinch.” She jumps a bit as her first pap smear sample is collected. Her mum sooths her hand.

 

“Hold steady now luv.” She squeezes her hand.

 

“Going to check your uterus now.”  A bit more pressure as her fingers enter as her other hand presses on the top of it.

 

“Owe!”

 

“Sorry. All done now.” She moves her fingers out. “Your uterus is where it should be, the right size. All looks good. Get dressed and I will come back in and discuss what you can expect with the Pill.”

 

She happily slips her pants back on. “That wasn’t to bad.” She tells her mum.

 

“It gets easier.”

 

The doctor knocks and walks back in. “Alright Miss Claire, let’s discuss a few things. The Pill stops ovulation by tricking the body into thinking it is pregnant. Because of this, you may experience weight gain, sore breasts, maybe headaches, at first. This should ease after the first month or so. You must take it every day at the same time. That is very important, as the hormone level must stay the same. If you are placed on antibiotics, you must use a backup form of birth control. Your periods should get lighter and may stop. That is normal. Any questions?”

 

She is blushing again. “Not about the pill. I know it takes a month to be active and we are waiting until.. ah, anyway.” She fiddles with her fingers. “It is about then. The first time. He is, ah, oh God, bigger then your fingers. I fear…”

 

“Claire, look at me.” She does lifting her soft brown eyes up. “Must have the same fear. Have you and him did things to make you climax?”

 

“Yes,” her eyes darken at the memories. “he makes me feel really good.” From beside her, her mum makes a noise of shock. “Oh, sorry mum.”

 

“No luv. You just answer the doctor’s questions.”

 

“That is good. It is your body’s way of preparing for him. The more pleasure he gives you before, the easier it will be. The first time will still be difficult but, if he does that, it shouldn’t be to painful.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Start on this today. Take them even when you are on your cycle. At the same time each day.”

 

“I will.”

 

“You will do great Claire. In all honesty, most girls I see at your age is for signs of VD’s or pregnancy. Your mum raised you right.”

 

“Thank you.” They both tell her. Claire leaves with a oblong case of birth control and the knowledge she needs. Julia leaves with the knowledge that her little girl is now a responsible woman. It is a bittersweet revelation.

[leowenila]

Going for The Goal

Hello! The other day while listening to one of my favorite playlists for writing and appreciating the beautiful weather outside; this spontaneous idea at complete random appeared in my mind and I knew that I needed to expand on it, instantly. Highly unlikely that this will have a second part primarily because I almost never finish second parts, which causes me to have several already started multi-fics in the making; but I would definitely be willing to write another part if it is requested. Here is “Going for The Goal,” please enjoy!

Long vibrant strands of fresh grass waved in a repetitive motion as a calming wind passed through the suburban area of lower Seattle, on the perfect and early spring day. Homes across the picturesque neighborhood remained quiet as various residents continued to sleep including the larger home hidden beneath a cluster of trees. Inside the man-made home was Owen and Amelia as they peacefully laid in one another’s arms while their three young children slept in different rooms opposite the master, towards the back of the home. The male trauma surgeon’s rounded muscular hand naturally rested on Amelia’s growing stomach causing him to feel every rise and fall of her chest through her abdomen along with small but noticeable movements from their already active baby girl.

Slowly the bright sun welcomed its presence throughout the shaded home into the windows indicating the dreadful morning hours. With her beautiful eyes remained shut, the pregnant neurosurgeon grasped onto Owen’s hand making her tired muscles relax. Amelia groaned after noticing the brightness.

“How are you feeling this morning?” Owen lethargically inquired of Amelia once he had noticed her carefully shift in his arms seconds before she exhaustively yawned.

“Besides growing another small human inside of me and vomiting all my guts out last night, which caused me to almost faint? Better. I think my stomach muscles are still aching from it and the baby growing doesn’t help.” Amelia confessed honestly to her husband who seemed worried but instead he nodded in agreement.

“Leo has his first soccer game today; are you sure that you will feel up to it. I’m sure Maggie will film the entire thing.” The male trauma surgeon observed from the situation of his wife rubbing her swollen abdomen wearily, he patiently awaited her response in attempts to make sure she was okay.

Finally Amelia opened her tired eyes and matched her bright blue irises with his darker blues before adjusting her delicate hands from her stomach to the middle of Owen’s broad chest muscles then smiled at him, seconds before offering her statement.

“I love you; Owen.” The brunette reassured her husband which allowed him to acknowledge and understand how she was feeling. Being her soulmate; Owen knew exactly what she was feeling; although she was in a state of discomfort, her motherly instinct would sacrifice any amount of pain to witness and experience the joy of her children. Once hearing what she had to say and silently taking a note of how he can make her day brighter; Owen kissed Amelia with passion before he turned his head after hearing three small children at the tall door.

“Hi Daddy! Hi Mama!” Their youngest son, Cortland announced as his two older brothers stood on either side of him. Once more the male trauma surgeon kissed the brunette before removing himself from the thick comforter and bent his knees to the children’s eye-level.

“Alright soldiers. One of you decided that it was a good idea to get the others up after he decided to wake up himself. Who that is; is a mystery but don’t think that for a second that will trick, Major. Hunt.” The father teased with each son as the brunette continued peacefully resting in the bed, to watch her boys joke with one another. The man scanned into each pair of bright blue eyes carefully while they attempted to maintain straight faces that their father taught them at an early age.

“Mr. Leo is a soccer star as of today, so it could be him. Or maybe it’s Mr. Thomas who has his mama’s eyes but yet it could be Mr. Cortland but he’s my favorite. So it can’t be him? Mama? Who do you think our contestant is?” Owen proposed to Amelia who couldn’t contain her smile or laughter at the antics or each boy with their arms crossed over their small chests.

“My bets are totally on my little man.”

“Leo; it is!” Owen proclaimed aloud seconds before he lifted his six year old into his arms followed by lifting the two others above him until he landed them safely on the giant bed out of his muscular arms, where Amelia sat with her soft hands onto her stomach to feel the early morning kicks herself.

Once all the family was relaxing on the bed; the male trauma surgeon held Cortland in his arms and covered everyone with the thick blanket. Unprepared for what her oldest son was about to do Amelia flitched slightly once seeing his small arm come towards her stomach but was surprised the moment Leo rested his small hands in the middle of his mother’s growing and sore pregnant belly.

“Is my baby sister okay, mama? Does she not feel good when you don’t feel good?” Hearing Leo’s question; Amelia’s eyes immediately filled with small tears along with curiosity how he knew that she was not feeling well but knew already that someday he will care as much as his father does for the women he loves.

“Baby sister is wonderful, my little lion.” The neurosurgeon tearfully vocalized to her adopted son and the first one who made her become a mother for more than forty three minutes, while she played with his naturally curled hair he inherited from Betty. Owen and Amelia shared glances with one another ahead of mouthing their three favorite words.

Hours had come and gone, and the morning became an even more perfect afternoon when there was only an hour until Leo’s soccer game. In the rather large kitchen was the brunette as she placed healthy and organic snacks until plastic containers for the game while Owen remained occupied in his oldest son’s room to help him get in his uniform.

“Let’s go show mama!” Owen cheerfully directed to Leo who he walked behind as they made their way out of his bedroom, towards the kitchen. From afar the male trauma surgeon coughed to signal the neurosurgeon, she glanced up and saw the bright blue jersey along with shorts.

“Leo! You look amazing, what do you think?!” Amelia declared to Leo as he began to cheer for himself and the reaction he had been wanting of his mother’s approval.

Once they had arrived at the giant sports field; the male trauma surgeon parked in the parking space and shut off the minivan’s engine, Leo impatiently unbuckled his seatbelt before either one of his parents could exit the vehicle but remained sitting until his brothers were unlatched. Owen lifted Cortland into his arms before retrieving the lunch bag filled with several snacks beside him while Amelia helped Thomas step down off of the van’s platform then clasped onto his small hand and Leo followed.

“Drake!” Leo shouted to his teammate and cousin upon seeing him from afar sitting with his parents who patiently waited for the game to begin, in their lounge chairs and sunglasses covering their eyes to block out the bright sunlight.

“Leo!” Drake exclaimed back to his cousin before asking his mother for permission to run in the other boy’s direction. His mother approved and returned to reading her thick book. Both five year olds grew close over their years because their mothers shared a never ending bond as sisters as well as being two of the most successful surgeons at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital.

“I’m so happy to see you; sister. I didn’t think you were coming!” Maggie cheerfully told her sister as she hugged her tightly mere moments before adjusting her hands down to Amelia’s growing abdomen.

“Hello baby girl; this is your Auntie Maggie. Don’t ever forget that.” The female cardiothoracic surgeon directed to her niece still inside the uterus while Andrew DeLuca greeted his brother in law and colleague once he removed himself from the lounge chair. Both men set up the extra lawn chairs for the rest of the family beside Andrew and Maggie’s other kids.

Twenty five minutes into the game as the third quarter was just seconds away, one of Leo’s teammates dribbled the ball towards him and passed it to him from being instructed by their coach; adrenaline was high and cheers soared for the home team although it wasn’t labeled as a competition all the parents made sure to cheer for their child. Getting ready to kick the ball towards the net, a slightly taller boy from the away team pushed Leo onto the ground with force. Before the small boy hit the ground the brunette ran as fast as her six month pregnant body could allow followed by the male trauma surgeon to reach their son. Favoring his mother’s tough will; Leo refused to cry despite the tears that were in his eyes, Amelia started to tear up at the site of seeing her son injured and felt paralyzed at what to do until Owen’s steady and calming nature took over, and reassured the both of them before he lifted Leo into his arms to walk back to the minivan. As they walked back Maggie nodded her head in Amelia’s direction, signaling that her and Andrew were able to take care of their nephews.

Once arriving at the hospital; Owen put the vehicle in park and turned off the engine to have it rest in one of the employee parking spots, he retrieved his son from the back seat in which his wrist hung down. The male trauma surgeon walked in the emergency department with Amelia behind him and was greeted with Meredith following.

“Hey; how was the game?” The older general surgeon asked her sister who was visually distraught and in pain, the brunette did not say a word but just stood in the doorway of the trauma room where she watched her husband and son who started sobbing in pain just minutes before, while a wave of pain shot through his arm. Although Amelia knew it was only an arm injury, the sympathy pain she felt was unimaginable. Meredith glanced back and forth between Owen and Amelia.

“Leo got pushed to the ground and his arm is broken. Either get an orthopedic surgeon down here or allow me to fix this.” Owen requested of Meredith who snapped on her gloves to take a glance at the laceration on her nephew’s head.

The general surgeon informed her intern to page an available orthopedic surgeon before the male trauma surgeon got angry, once the brunette heard Meredith’s request of the intern, she finally sat on the other side of Leo and took his hand.

“Ah, okay. Hey little guy!” The familiar voice boasted as he walked into the local trauma room causing both Owen and Amelia to glance up from where their eyes rested on each other.

“You paged Dr. Lincoln out of all the surgeons in this hospital?” Owen stressed to the clueless intern who looked helpless but sprinted out of the trauma room. Before Link started to snap the surgical gloves onto his hand, Leo stopped him.

“You got in Daddy’s way when I was a baby, don’t even dare touching my arm. Mommy don't even liked you!” Leo’s small but powerful voice ordered the blonde orthopedic surgeon before the man backed up in his standing position. Amelia and Owen attempted to remain a similar straight face to the ones that mirrored their sons’ earlier that day.

Once Link left the room the brunette bursted into laughter causing Owen to join in, causing the little boy to accompany his parents laughter knowing that he said something funny. The male trauma surgeon held out his hand for Leo to slap it with his non-injured hand.

“I think Leo just shot his first goal.” Owen proudly told Amelia who nodded her head in agreement after appreciating what type of life she happily had after deciding to shoot her own goal four years prior and returning back to her soulmate’s arms. 

Thank you so much for reading!

[askadvicetozy]

My own blog/diary  Chapter7

In many species, sexual arousal is closely tied to variations in hormonal level. In humans, however hormones play less of a role. Reproductive system is a system of sex organs that is design for reproduction and sexual function like sexual activity and sexual intercourse of an opposite gender. In one sense the brain is where sexual desires are form or originate and it is where sexual behavior are controlled. Sexual fantasies play a significant role in our sexual arousal, sexual fantasies include imagining a person that is naked and imagining the person you like in a sexual way.

Adolescence is a transitional stage of physical and psychological development that generally occurs during the period from puberty to legal adulthood. In the beginning of adolescence is marked by a rapid physical change, including maturation of both girl and boy reproductive system and the development of primary and secondary sex characteristic. The primary sex characteristics are the physical characteristics that can differ the male and female from each other. For the male it is their penis, testes or testicles scrotum and prostate gland. For the female it is our vagina, ovary and uterus. The secondary sex characteristics will be developed during in the stage of puberty in the age of 10-12 years old for female and 12-15 years old for male. For the female the first sign of puberty is the enlargement of the breast and next is the growing of pubic hairs in the vagina and in the armpit, enlargement of hips and making shape of the body and the last puberty that a female will get is the menstruation stage which means that they will start to produce fertile eggs in their uterus. In the female puberty the female body will start to produce progesterone which promotes growth of reproductive organs and prepare for pregnancy. For the male the first sign of puberty is the enlargement of their penis and their voice will start to deepens as their grow and they will also grow a pubic hair near their penis and in their armpit, they will also grow a hair around their face which is called mustache and beard. The later puberty that a male will experience is that they will sweat more and sooner or later while in their sleep they will experience the called wet dreams.

The female reproductive system is composed of the clitoris, vagina, uterus, fallopian tubes and two ovaries. The clitoris is the one that will get hard when a female is sexually aroused. The vagina is a muscular tube where the penis of a male will enter when a female and male want to do intercourse, the vagina is also the passage way of a child during giving birth. The two ovaries are the one that produces egg cell and release the egg cells during ovulation. The uterus where the egg and sperm go when one female gets pregnant and it is where the fetus will live for 9 months before coming out in this world. The fallopian tube is the one who will carry the fertilized egg from the ovary to the uterus.

The male reproductive system is the penis, the urethra, the scrotum, the testes, the epididymis, urinary bladder, and the seminal vesicle. The penis is where the male urine will come out and the passage way of the sperm cells to go to the vagina of the female. The penis will erect when the male is sexually attracted. The urethra connects the to the ductus deferens in males, for the ejaculation of sperm. The scrotum is the bag of skin that holds and helps to protect the testicles. The testes are the one that makes the sperm cells, the testes are also are a pair of sperm-producing organs that maintain the health of the male reproductive system. The urinary bladder is the one where the urine is stored, allowing urination to be infrequent and controlled. And lastly is the seminal vesicle, the seminal vesicle are two small glands that store and produce the majority of the fluid that makes up semen.

Many people have a question that “what does turns people on?” there are a lot of thing that a person can turn them on like when a guy sees a legs, that legs might turns him on, every person has a different personality and every person have a different things that can turns them on. Sexual arousal is said that it is the momentary level of sexual excitement. The erogenous zone is the area of the body that is highly sensitive and produce sexual response when stimulated, it is like for a guy, their sensitive part is their penis, when a girl accidentally touches their penis then their penis will automatically erect. Many people said that when you compare a woman to men, men think about sex more than woman think of it because men think more of sex and men think more frequent sex fantasies and more frequent feeling of sexual desires. women tend to place more emphasis on emotional closeness with a lover than men do. Men and woman are equal when it come to sexual arousal because both men and woman are getting arouse in their life.

There are a phases in sexual response which is the excitement, plateau, orgasm and the resolution. The excitement stage is the base stage which is where the man and the woman are still at the beginning of the arousal stage, the man and woman can feel in this stage that their heart are beating too fast and their breathing weakens, this stage usually last at least 1-3 minutes. This stage the man reproductive system which is the penis will start to erect or to get hard and the reproductive system of a woman will start to produce liquid and that is called the wet of a woman, the clitoris will swells and the lips of the vagina will start to open. The plateau phase is not so different in the first phase, the man penis will erect more and will get more bigger than the usual, in woman the outer part of the vagina will swell and the upper lips of the vagina will get red. The orgasm phase is the climax of the sexual intercourse of a woman and man, in this phase the man will produce sperm cell from his penis and for the woman the muscle of the vagina will contract. The last phase is the resolution phase, this phase is where everything will get back to the normal state of the body of a person, the penis is no longer erected, and the vagina is in normal stage now.

As a person grow up and mature, they usually make new pattern of relationship and commitment with other people. During adolescence, dating and courtship are said to be increasingly important. Puberty is really an important stage of development, a girl and boy started to experience their first sexual attraction from their opposite sex. Physical attractiveness is when a person is attracted in the beauty of another person and getting pleased by their beauty. Social exchange theory is that as the relationship develops, the sharing of a couple will get deeper and deeper, that is when they’ll know each other more and more, and more information contributes to increased attraction, liking, trust, and love. The romantic love is a complex combination of different emotions which are the fear of losing you partner, anger of something they did, sexual desire towards your partner, happiness when you are with them, and jealousy. Some of these emotions can be very uncomfortable because even if you don’t want to feel that emotion, it will automatically make you feel what you need to feel. It is like when I am mad at my boyfriend, I can’t really hide it from him because he will notice it when we talk and another example is when I am jealous of some girl and I don’t want to tell him because I think I am just being dramatic and insecure, but I surely can’t stop being jealous even if I want to stop. Feelings are letting us feel what we should really feel, and we can’t do something about it even if we wanted to stop feeling that way.

Psychologist Robert Sternberg said that there are 3 component of love which are the intimacy, passion, and commitment. The intimacy is the feeling of the connectedness to your partner and the closeness of the both of you and the bonding that you share together. It is like for example me and my boyfriend’s bonding is by playing Call of duty and watching movies together even when we are so far away from each other and sometimes when we are busy we will still make time to play at least 2-3 games just so that we’ll be more close to each other and have bonding in LDR. The passion is the component that will drive a person to romance, physical attraction and sexual consumption, like attempting to have sex with your partner. The commitment component is the decision of a person to love and to stay inlove in their partner and the decision to maintain inlove. Like when a couple is struggling to fix something in their relationship but they still choose to stay in each other’s lives then that is the commitment, they are maintaining the love that they have in each other and not just giving up their relationship. Helen Fisher said that the important ingredient of love is lust, attraction, and attachment. The important of lust in love is that the lust makes the spice in the relationship and it makes everything fun while you are in a relationship. The attraction is also important too because it is the one that will associate with sexual attraction. The attachment is very important because it is the desire of a person to be attach in the person they love.

Sex orientation refers to a person's sexual identity anchored on what gender they are attracted to. The most common sexual orientation in which one is sexually attracted to members of the opposite sex is heterosexuality. Bisexual is the person that is attracted to both sex male and female. STD (Sexual transmitted disease) are can be passed by doing sexual intercourse and by doing oral like eating vagina or eating penis and it can also be transmitted by doing the anal intercourse. Not having sex is the safest method to avoid all forms of STI (sexual transmitted infection) and STD, not having sex is also the safest method to not to get pregnant at an early age.

Using contraceptive can help to avoid early pregnant. The example of contraceptive is condom, it is for the man to use so that their sperm will not inter the woman’s vagina. IUD is another contraceptive that is inserted in the woman’s vagina and to block the sperms in woman’s uterus from entering to the ovaries. The birth control is just another form of contraceptive that is for woman to take just like medicine, but birth controls have the side effects like changing mood and being easily irritated. Some of my friend who are doing intercourse with their boyfriend are using contraceptive birth control and I can see that they often have mood swings when we are hanging out together.

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

Episode 3 of The Witcher now!!

I expect this episode to delve a bit deeper in Geralt’s character and forward the plot a bit less than the previous one, or maybe not. Let’s see.

Oh poor boy got a grisly fate. I like the way they used the boy’s shock and terror to deliver the exposition in a way that doesn’t feel too much like charactersplaining, which is something fantasy can suffer from. Also the monster origin story is cool.

The slaughterhouse scene is so creepy, well done XD

Geralt is taking a little vacation which, good for him. I appreciate this is the kind of production where the sight of a woman’s nipples is banned even when i doesn’t make sense for her to be covering her breast. (*American gasp of horror*)

Meanwhile in the monster-afflicted town, workers are deciding to unionize and make a revolution, but Geralt points out that that’s unrealistic. Good idea, since a whole bunch of fully armed soldiers gets there in fancy organized fashion. Still, I feel you guys.

The plot thickens! The king’s sorceress wants to save the creature. I wonder if it’s something about the dead girl the monster supposedly originates from...? Like something about women.

It is! The girl was the king’s sister and the child the heir to the throne. Uh-oh.

Ah-ha, female monster. I knew it would be about women. Nothing to do with wolves but a curse...

Oh my god, that’s so awkward. Why are you having sex like that.

Yennefer gets nominated for Queer Eye and gets a new wardrobe to start a new chapter of her life feeling confident! But I’m thinking the makeover will come at a price that’s not five gay friends and happy feels.

She is already stunning but okay! Girl just brush your hair and idk apply bright red lipstick and you’re ready! But hey.

Oh my god. So what happened to the cursed girl is-- yikes.

Alright, I’m officially not following the timeline of this show. Yennefer’s plot is happening when Cirilla’s grandmother was young? When is Geralt’s happening? Well I guess I’ll find out.

So Yennefer gets assigned to Shitty Sexual Harasser King as a mage advisor because she is part elf, because her boyfriend passed the information on Misogynistic Mage? Boo.

Those pants are so tight.

Oh, more yikes in cursed girl storyline.

I’m sorry Yennefer and her boyfriend broke up but also yay character development and stuff.

Alright, the incest siblings are kids during Yennefer’s plot so Geralt’s is happening later. Well this episode explains the ?? moments I had before that I dismissed at me being dumb. Well, good to know it wasn’t me...

Yennefer decides to have magic plastic surgery without anesthesia. Whoa.

Geralt is Done(TM).

Well, the king turns out to be not as shitty as expected. The relationship with his sister was consensual, and the guy kinda just found himself in a shitty situation.

“I envy you. To live and never have to fall in love” ahahaaaahshajak sure

The price for magic plastic surgery is the inability to bear children. Or, better, to have your literal uterus carved out... Interesting, considering there’s a subplot here about a child born by a dead mother, who ripped her way out of the womb once it matured. The shrieks of the shriga are paralleled to Yennefer’s screams as the surgeon operates. Two monsters, born from opposite directions. Geralt said that the princess only knew rage and hunger all her life, and that’s the same for Yennefer, hunger for validation and appreciation and love.

Yennefer basically gives birth to her new self, the scene is filmed like a childbirth, with her sitting like a woman about to give birth and then screaming and clutching the chair, and eventually screaming as she symbolically comes out of her own skin painted with her burned uterus.

Geralt prevents the shriga from going back into the tomb by sealing himself in it... the tomb being a metaphor for a mother’s womb, since it’s the tomb of the shriga’s mother, from whose womb the shriga came out of.

When Geralt comes out of the tomb, it’s re-birth from a mother’s womb, just like the shriga is reborn as a human girl and Yennefer is reborn in her new self.

He almost dies but is healed by the sorceress, basically acting as the midwife that delivers him to life safely (and gives him some wise words).

Meanwhile Yennefer shows up and everyone is Shook but also this isn’t boding well. Also I need to warm up to her new appearance

And meanwhile (well, not really ‘meanwhile’ since this damned show is playing with timelines, but you get what I mean) Ciri hears strange voices and poor Rat Boy dies :’(

The girl is in the woods now... yet something tells me that Ciri’s and Geralt’s plots are not happening at the same time, because that would be not complicated enough.

So I really enjoyed this episode! It was pretty heavy, and I love birth imagery as you might have guessed from my Supernatural stuff, so this is some nice material for me. I’m looking forward to see more!