#let all the matrix puns begin | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

inventors-fair · 5 years ago

Text

Pop Culture Commentary

Thank you all for your contributions this week! I’m really proud with the way that people took from a variety of shows, books, movies and video games. Fun contests like this are interesting because I gotta let my guard down and not take things so seriously.

With that in mind, here we go!

@ace-hobo — Rouse the Oathbreakers

Great rare tribal card. I like how it’s fairly low-cost and is a flavor win plus a really fun niche tribal build-around. When you’re reanimating, use “return,” see Angel of Glory’s Rise. Additionally, if you’re using MSE, shift+enter will allow you to put the attribution underneath the quote.

@cas-420 — Left for Dead

As a spell by itself, I like how powerful it is. However, I’m not sure I understand the name as it relates to the card; I know you wanted a connection with the game, but I feel that the connection is tentative. “Last Stand” or something would have been more appropriate. I don’t think you need “All” in that second ability, and you can just steal Angel’s Grace wording for the other part. Fun Orzhov card!

@dabudder — The Heart of Etheria

I love this card. It tells a story about legendary creatures, it tells a story about sacrifice, and it’s, no pun intended, heartbreaking. “Heart” in “Heart counters” doesn’t need to be capitalized, but “return” does. I feel that for storytelling it could also work better if the trigger happened at the beginning of your end step.

@dimestoretajic — Shepard’s Charm

This is a weird build-around-me. I think that despite the gameplay being a little weird to say the least, you use colorless mana effectively to show artifacts as machines of their own in this world. You were right about missing “token.” It happens, no biggie. I have the feeling that running multiple copies of this is a bit much, considering the strength of “gain control of all permanents” that would eventually happen. Oh, God, copying this...

@donutwraith — Unorthodox Summon

I’m afraid without context, I don’t understand this card at all. What is “sem?” What clearance? Also, why “Gentle Giant?” I know it makes sense flavorfully, perhaps, but it’s weird as an actual card type. Zero mana flash enchantments are... Dangerous, mechanically. I can’t think of any ways that it would be broken off the top of my head, but I can think of several players who’d be chomping at the bit to play it.

@emmypupcake — Louisoix’s Final Sealing

Great flavor. Cool moment. Very overcosted. Six mana for a narrow removal spell like this... Well, I’d rather run a board-wipe or simply a two-mana card that does the exact same thing. For such a high cost and with the legendary restriction, in the future consider other cards and their impact that they have for that mana, then see what other powerful effect you could add.

@fractured-infinity — Preservation // Ruin // Harmony

Are these the names of actual characters and events in the book? Not sure how to feel about that. I like how Harmony can be “destroyed” by your opponents chipping away at their own resources. Watch out for run-on sentences in “Ruin” with that first ability. Without the book context, I think the names are kinda banal, but that’s just me being a pretentious douche canoe. I’m sure that the books make them more effective.

Genex-P — Soylent Green is People

Great flavor connection! Remember that the quote attribution needs to go on a different line, and that when making Food tokens they have reminder text instead of rules text, see Bake into a Pie. Also, remember, a COMMA after the G, and exile a human CARD. Gotta be specific about these things!

@ghost31415926535 — Siege of the White Lotus

Really interesting enchantment! I love how it rewards multicolor strategies and turns all your stuff into the Avatar in their own special way. Flavorfully, it’s been a while since I’ve watched AtlA but there are other people who can tell me whether or not this checks out. I’m a fan of the card in general. Just remember proper capitalization and punctuation. There may be an easier way of wording this all too, but I like how it reads.

@gollumni — Imperfect Clone

Darnit, Brian. Bryan? Whatevers. I love this flavor, especially in context. I’m thinking of different ways to word it. “Until end of turn, target creature you control has the same base power and toughness as target creature you don’t control.” IDK, this card’s fun.

@greensunzenith — The Culling of Straholme

I love this card, and the only thing that bugs me, the ONLY thing, is that I didn’t know if that first ability “works.” Aether Storm shows that it does, and I should have done more research. Call this one an honorary runner-up. It tells a fantastic story about the option of destruction followed by the inevitable turning. Man, yeah, whoever’s reading this, this card’s getting added to the runner’s up. It was a really tough series of choices this week.

@haru-n-harkel — Passing of the Matrix

What an interesting card! I’m not sure what the Matrix is, but this card lets me show that it’s a mark of leadership, that it makes a creature legendary flavorfully, and that it’s not resigned to one generation. Not bad! You don’t need “target” in the first line, and don’t forget that when you do a quote, the name goes on a separate line.

@hypexion — The Turning

Pretty sure there should be an emdash between 8 and WW, but I forget. Anyway, funky little card you got here. I’m not sure why it doesn’t have a mana cost flavorfully, but I get how it works mechanically. Good on you for the wording of the activated ability. I’m not sure how something “turning” begets the flavor of destruction, though? Also, yadda yadda quoter second line, you’ve heard me say it thrice up there.

@ignorantturtlegaming — Yoshi’s Adventure

Well if this ain’t a flavor win if I ever saw one! Dinos, eggs, and humans. Really funky stuff. Three wording things. One: The second ability should be something more like “Whenever a Human you control dies, sacrifice ~.” Two: You don’t need to “Sacrifice an Egg you control,” just “Sacrifice an Egg.” Three: It should be “”This creature deals 2 damage to any target.”” instead of just “deal.” Other than that, great first submission.

@illharg-the-rave-boar — Shutdown

Ah, sci-fi. One day we’ll get there in Magic. Anyway, this card! I think that you could have stapled the “End the turn” line to the previous one, but aside from that, I think this card is super cool, a good mythic for this day and age. Pretty fun in a midrange-control build. I know nothing about the game, but I like the feeling of a forced shutdown that you present. Probably the best example of the genre we could ask for.

@juggernaut-is-a-metalhead — Blood and Thunder

This is a weird heckin’ card. The name and flavor text feel really disconnected from the abilities, though, which is a shame because mechanically this is an insane card that could be very fun in the right deck. The flavor the abilities present of “the world is breaking around me but with enough power I turn into a leviathan” is really awesome.

@kavinika — Sadeas’s Betrayal

Let’s look at the card Sudden Disappearance. With that, I believe this spell could read “Exile all creatures you control. Return the exiled cards to the battlefield under their owner's control at the beginning of the next end step. Then, destroy all creatures attacking a player or permanent other than you.” You don’t necessarily need the combat clause, but I understand how it could be useful to prevent just blinking. Maybe if it destroyed any number of target attacking creatures?

@koth-of-the-hammerpants — Holistic Assassination

9/10, but 1. Enchantments don’t tap, and 2. This feels like it would be very easy to abuse without a higher cost for returning it. Flavor’s interesting, card plays great, it’s a pain in the butt. Very fun.

@mistershinyobject — Zulf’s Fate

Once again, you return creature cards from the graveyard to the battlefield. Wording aside, I really like the dichotomy of this card. It’s a gristly fate that you presented quite well. There’s not a lot to say because the card speaks for itself, and that’s a strength.

@misterstingyjack — Shared Demise

I don’t really like the wording on this, as interesting as the concept is. I feel like it’s a bit much for one chunk of text. Maybe “fate counters” could work here? Like, when ~ enters the battlefield, put a fate counter on target creature, whenever a creature with a fate counter leaves the battlefield sacrifice enchanted creature, and when enchanted creature leaves the battlefield the fate counter creatures are sacrificed? I hope that makes sense. It’s hard to feel “clean” with the wording you have here.

@nine-effing-hells — Hydraulic Salvation

Neat little name! I don’t think you need to add “if you do” to that second mode. And on a card like this, I wouldn’t add the flavor text. I really don’t think it’s strong enough to add anything to this card. Flavorful use of Miracle, though.

@piecesofliquid — Tragic Reunion

This is a really cool card. Wording seems a little off, but you used flavor effectively to bring back two dueling characters. “You and target opponent each return up to one creature card from your graveyards to the battlefield. Those creatures gain vigilance, haste, and “etc.”” Great use of dual flavor text, even though I can’t quite tell who’s saying what. I don’t watch the show, thpt.

@shakeszx — I Am Iron Man

I really like how we got two Iron Man submissions next to each other, lol. Two things: It should be “tap an UNTAPPED non-Legendary creature you control,” and you need a shuffle clause at the end of the whole thing. Great idea, funky flavor. Feels more like citizens summoning a legend, but I like the notion anyway. It’s very marvel. Could be RW.

@shootingstarhunter — Inevitable Ultimatum

Having watched the movie, this card would have made more sense if it was an additional cost to sacrifice the legendary creature and it just destroyed all nonland permanents you didn’t control. Also, the flavor text should be in quotes. Aside from that, I really love this card. It’s an ultimatum that feels like an ultimatum. It’s appropriately costed and at the right rarity. So there we go!

@snugz — Good King Moggle Mog XII

What a name. This is a frustrating and flavorfully annoying boss card that I can imagine an AI playing as kind of an Arena boss fight. Fourteen power for eight mana is... Well, it’s not the craziest thing Magic’s done in the past, but the fact that it repeats, man. 10/10 for cute and game capture feel.

@sorustyitshines — The World Eater’s Ascent

I get that it’s an epic card, but “can’t be countered” isn’t really in the BW pie. Regardless, it’s a powerful boardwipe that, uh, doesn’t destroy enchantments for some reason? Not sure why, maybe it’s an in-game thing. Anyway, fine Commander card, good Evil Rise kinda thing. Overall interesting, but not my favorite in terms of execution.

@starch255 — Enter Star Wolf

“For each of them, create a token that’s a copy of that card, except...” I think is the right wording. At least that’s how I grok it. Funky little card! I love how you used black Vehicles to create the evil spaceship feel. It’s a good sci-fi trope to have vehicles. The “four” is also a nice touch.

@teaxch — Claudius’s Plan

Now ain’t this tragic. Interesting card! I like how it only lasts for a turn, giving your opponent one turn to have the deathtouch brigade. Not sure exactly how a poisoned chalice gives EVERYTHING deathtouch, but what the hell, it’s Shakespearian, everything’s tragic, right? I think this card is pretty cool, would make limited fun.

@thegreateyebrows — Khert Fire

Hm, that might have to be a replacement ability. “If a spell or ability would target a permanent or player, that spell targets a permanent or player chosen at random instead.” “Whenever a player casts a spell, if that spell has no target, Khert Fire deals 2 damage to that player.” It doesn’t really need vanishing. If there are any rules people out there, tell me if my wording is off.

@tmstage — Cage the Traveler

This probably should be a rare for how niche the hate is, like Blood Moon, but the ability certainly feels mythic. I like this card a lot. I’ve never played destiny, but this card gives me stakes. There’s a “traveler,” akin to a planeswalker, and there’s something sapping them of their power, a primary antagonist with a goal and a mysterious identity. Bam, established. Not a bad job.

Thank you all for your entries! New contest tomorrow.

#mtg #magic the gathering #custom magic card #pop culture moment #contest #commentary #inventor's fair

18 notes · View notes

explodingcrenelation · 6 years ago

Text

Tony Stark and the Messianic Archetype in Avengers: Endgame

* * * * * S P O I L E R S ahead for Avengers: Endgame * * * * *

From a purely analytical standpoint, I don’t have anything against Tony’s character arc in Endgame culminating with his death. His last moments in the heat of battle weren’t rushed, poorly written, or unearned. If Tony Stark was going to die on screen, of course he’d do it like a goddamn badass—and he did.

At this point Marvel is telling a single story to millions upon millions of people and there’s no way they can craft a narrative to suit every single person. When I say Tony's death didn’t work for me, I do so knowing that Marvel wasn’t writing the story for me anyway. And I'm not trying to disparage the creative team's efforts and storytelling choices. They made a call. I don’t agree it was the right one.

For me, Tony’s death traps him inside a Messianic Archetype that doesn’t elevate his character in a wholly satisfying way and doesn’t fit the themes of the established, team-centric universe. In this essay I will…

…actually write a fucking 4000-word essay, so buckle up and read on if you’re in for the ride.

What Is the Messianic Archetype?

The Messianic Archetype is a messiah trope. It’s exactly what it sounds like—one person (usually (but not always) white, usually (but not always) male) who sacrifices themselves for the greater good.

Here’s how TV Tropes puts it:

In media, the Messianic Archetype is a character whose role in the story (but not necessarily personality) echoes that of Christ. They are portrayed as a savior, whether the thing they are saving is a person, a lot of people or the whole of humanity. They endure a sizable sacrifice as the means of bringing that salvation about for others, a fate they do not deserve up to and including death or a Fate Worse than Death. Other elements may be mixed and matched as required but the Messianic Archetype will include one or more of the following:

- The Chosen One. - True Companions who follow him. - Betrayal by one of those followers. - Persecution by nonbelievers. - Crucified Hero Shot (or other parallels to the Passion Play). - Figurative or literal resurrection. - A Second Coming. - The initials JC.

Some examples of Messianic Archetypes in popular narratives are: Gandalf in Lord of the Rings, Spock in Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan (or Kirk in Star Trek: Into Darkness), Harry Potter in The Deathly Hallows, Superman in Batman vs Superman, or Neo in the Matrix trilogy. The Doctor in Doctor Who is frequently and repeatedly presented as a messiah figure. Multiple incarnations of Sherlock also follow suit in multiple imaginings of the the Reichenbach Falls scenario. (I won’t go into details with any of these characters. I trust the Messianic Archetypes here are obvious to anyone familiar with these stories.)

In the Marvel Cinematic Universe itself, we see Messianic Archetypes popping up all over the place—like daisies! Steve plays this part when he sacrifices himself in The First Avenger to stop Red Skull's plan to bomb several major American cities. His time in the ice is a kind of death from which he is subsequently “resurrected” in modern day New York. To a lesser extent, he also offers himself up as a sacrifice to save Bucky in The Winter Soldier.

T’Challa follows this pattern in Black Panther when he’s betrayed by W’Kabi, defeated by Killmonger, and subsequently resurrected within the safety of M’Baku’s tribe.

In the first Thor movie, Thor is betrayed by Loki, sacrifices himself to the Destroyer to protect his human friends, and he comes back from near-death with the return of Mjölnir, having proven himself worthy of the hammer.

Carol Danvers destroys Mar-Vell’s engine in Captain Marvel to keep enemies from getting their hands on tech that could harm millions of innocent people. Her human life symbolically ends in the subsequent explosion, and she’s effectively reborn with superpowers.

Pepper Potts is betrayed by her former colleague Killian in Iron Man 3, selected as his “chosen one” for the Extremis injection, and she dies and is reborn from fire.

Yondu in Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2—

Well, I could go on for a long time, but... you get the idea.

The Messianic Archetype isn’t particularly new to popular media, let alone the MCU.

This trope is deeply, almost subconsciously, woven into the fabric of popular western storytelling. There's nothing inherently wrong with that. Tropes are tropes for a reason—they speak to us on a cultural and instinctual level. We want to hear these stories over and over, replay them in new ways and look at them from different angles precisely because there is something meaningful in the narrative.

And Tony Stark's narrative is no exception. His repeated acts of self-sacrifice fit into the Messianic Archetype very, very well.

Proof That Tony Stark Has a Heart

The MCU kicked off in 2008 with the first Iron Man movie and Tony Stark has ostensibly been the main character of the franchise from the beginning.

The Iron Man movies establish early on that Tony has a savior complex to match the size of his ego. Our genius playboy billionaire philanthropist is a deeply flawed hero who started out his career as a maker of WMDs. He was widely known as “The Merchant of Death” before he saw the error of his ways. Tony understands he has done many Bad Things and he must atone for those Bad Things—with his life, if necessary.

“I shouldn’t be alive, unless it was for a reason. ... I finally know what I have to do and I know in my heart that it’s right.” —Tony Stark, Iron Man

The first Iron Man movie climaxes with Tony ordering Pepper to blow the Arc Reactor to stop Stane’s rampage, even though Tony might perish in the process. In Iron Man 2, Tony is actively dying from palladium poisoning, but he faces down Vanko (sans Iron Man suit) on the speedway of the Monaco Historic Grand Prix. In the first Avengers movie, we see Tony put his life on the line to get a nuclear weapon out of New York.

This is a repeated pattern for Tony, and like an addict, it’s one he struggles to break. Over and over Tony flings himself into the fray, believing he’s the one who makes the difference—he’s the willing sacrifice whose blood saves the world.

Tony selects himself to be “the chosen one” because he sees himself as the one at fault for bringing evil into the world.

“We create our own demons. Who said that? What does that even mean? Doesn’t matter, I said it cause he said it. ...So why am I telling you this? Because I had just created demons, and I didn’t even know it.” —Tony Stark, Iron Man 3

Iron Man 3 shows us just how deeply responsible Tony feels for the wrongs of the world. Because he made naive (and selfish) mistakes when he was young, Tony blames himself for creating villains that plague the earth now.

We see this best in the aftermath of the destruction of Tony’s mansion in Malibu.

“Pepper, it’s me. I’ve got a lot of apologies to make and not a lot of time. So first off, I’m so sorry I put you in harm’s way. That was selfish and stupid and it won’t happen again. ...And I’m sorry in advance because I can’t come home yet. I need to find this guy. You got to stay safe. That’s all I know.” —Tony Stark, Iron Man 3

Yes, Tony absolutely provoked the Mandarin, a known terrorist, and the result is the complete annihilation of Tony’s home. Tony accepts responsibility for the destruction as though he was the one who shot the missiles himself. He goes so far as to volunteer himself for a solo mission to find the Mandarin without even bothering to contact SHIELD or the Avengers for help. He made this mess, he’s going to clean it up. All the while he suffers through crippling anxiety and panic attacks, demonstrating that the burden he’s put on his own shoulders is, in fact, too much for him to handle by himself. Still, Tony denies himself the comforts of home and family until he can atone for his wrongdoings.

Miraculously, Iron Man 3 gives Tony a respite when the tables are turned and, for once, Tony is the one ultimately saved by Pepper. After her rescue (pun intended), Tony gives up the armor, commits to having the shrapnel taken out of his chest, and he starts rebuilding the literal ruins of his life—both physical and metaphorical.

The respite doesn’t last, of course, because recovery doesn’t go in a straight line—oh, and also the franchise isn’t over and the MCU kinda needs Iron Man. And so Tony slides back into familiar, self-destructive patterns.

"Few years ago, I almost lost [Pepper], so I trashed all my suits. Then, we had to muck up Hydra. And then Ultron. My fault. And then, and then, and then. I never stopped. 'Cause the truth is, I don't wanna stop.” —Tony Stark, Civil War

Tony taking on the mantle of the Messianic Archetype once more in Endgame falls perfectly in line with his established need to compulsively and perpetually atone for his sins. As a perfectionist who needs to assuage his guilt for his ongoing (and perceived) failures, Tony simply can’t stop himself from offering up his life in penance. Statistically it was bound to catch up with him, and in Endgame it does.

And not only does Tony give his life in true Messianic fashion, we are “treated” to a hyper-realistic and painfully extended sequence where his life drains out of him as his loved ones gather to witness him gasping out his last breath. (Thanks for that, by the way, Marvel. I’ll put this scene with the dead baby bunnies my childhood cat used to bring home as gifts. How thoughtful.)

Maybe the reason for the intensity of Tony’s death scene is to make the audience believe his death is the Real Thing, not some comic-book-superhero-movie trickery that he’ll be back from in a few minutes’ time. Perhaps it’s the only way to ensure we commit to the emotional depth of the moment. Perhaps the filmmakers see it as an homage to RDJ’s acting talent and commitment to the role. Regardless of the rationale behind the camera’s unflinching gaze, Tony’s excruciating death hammers home the brutal and lonely reality of the Messianic Archetype: it’s cruel to put the fate of the world on one person’s shoulders.

But Tony embraces that end. He throws himself into the machinery of fate, convinced he’s the cog that will make it all work.

And he does make it work.

So why is that a problem?

The Team-Oriented Universe

The problem with Tony doubling (tripling? quadrupling?) down on the Messianic Archetype at the apex of the franchise is that the MCU is an ensemble, team-oriented universe.

“You think you're the only superhero in the world? Mr. Stark, you've become part of a bigger universe, you just don't know it yet." —Nick Fury, Iron Man

Fury tells us from the get-go that Tony isn’t the be-all-end-all of the MCU. It’s possible for Tony—for them all—to become something greater than the sum of their parts.

“There was an idea, Stark knows this, called the Avengers Initiative. The idea was to bring together a group of remarkable people, see if they could become something more.” —Nick Fury, Avengers

The entire first Avengers movie is dedicated to establishing this premise, to getting these knuckleheads to work together because, alone, they’re too wrapped up in their own bullshit to adequately deal with the forces that threaten the planet. Things don’t start to go right for them until they set aside their personal issues and act as a unit.

As we all know, our team passes the test and they establish an important principle of the MCU: teamwork is powerful and it’s more effective than working solo.

True, Tony’s self-sacrifice in the context of the Battle of New York helps save the day; but it’s only one part of a coordinated effort. Tony chucking the nuke into space would have been pointless without the added efforts of Steve to coordinate civilian safety, Hawkeye to relay enemy movements, Thor to separate Loki from the scepter, Natasha to close the portal, and Hulk to subdue Loki and ultimately catch Tony as he fell from the wormhole. The team achieved a better outcome together than they each could have achieved separately.

But even in the shared afterglow of winning the Battle of New York, the individual members of the team struggle to perfect their dynamic. New challenges present themselves. There’s always room for the team to grow and become stronger together as the franchise progresses. That’s the whole point.

Tony, for his part, waffles back and forth between his desire to be the savior mechanic (to fix everything by himself) and his desire to work cooperatively with his found-family of superheroes for the common good. This internal conflict plays out over the course of the franchise as Tony takes on the Mandarin by himself in Iron Man 3. The issue then escalates in Age of Ultron when Tony convinces Bruce to help him create Ultron, unbeknownst to the rest of the team. Murder-bot problems and team drama ensue. Tony’s cycle of guilt perpetuates itself in the wake of the disaster in Sokovia, which prompts Tony to adopt the Sokovia Accords. He submits himself and the team to UN governance in Civil War. More team drama ensues.

The logical progression of this escalating team conflict should have involved Tony confronting his deep-seated compulsion to destroy himself for the sake of others. This is exactly the problem Pepper keeps trying to point out to him—his Messianic tendencies have started to cause more problems than they solve.

“There is nothing except this. ... There's the next mission, and nothing else.” —Tony Stark, Iron Man

Tony has struggled from the beginning to find the right balance between personal sacrifice and sharing team effort.

Pepper frequently tries to remind Tony that he doesn’t live alone in the world, he can’t do it all by himself. And there are people who want him to live.

“You’re all I have, too, you know.” —Pepper Potts, Iron Man

Imagine how emotionally satisfying it would have been to see Tony outgrow his need for sacrificial penance and internalize a better lesson: that the savior can be saved, the burden can be shared, and life can go on.

A Better Ending for Tony

The MCU had the perfect opportunity to give us an ending that would be happier for Tony and a better fit for a team-centric universe.

In Guardians of the Galaxy we see Peter Quill and his team survive the power of an Infinity Stone by working together to share the burden of its energy.

Peter Quill is the son of a Celestial—he’s basically immortal up until the end of Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2. That’s why he and his team could hold the stone without any ill effects.

Also, they only had to channel the power of one stone. Not six.

That’s a fair point.

But by the time Tony had all of the Infinity Stones in Endgame, the battlefield was chock full of all kinds of superheroes. Wanda and Carol by themselves are embodiments of two of the Infinity Stones. Hulk had managed to bear all of the stones by himself earlier in the movie. Steve, T’challa, and Bucky are enhanced super soldiers. Thor, Valkyrie, and the other Asgardians might not be Celestials, but they are gods—and there were a lot of them on that field.

And we’re supposed to believe none of these characters could offer any help to Tony whatsoever? None of them could hold Tony’s hand for a single minute to save his life?

There are plenty of arguments that could be made: Tony was too fast, no one knew what was happening, or everyone else was occupied in battle. But at the end of the day, it’s a choice the creative team made. Tony died because they wanted him to die.

And not much would have to change to save his life.

Imagine this: Tony gets the stones from Thanos and, in true Messianic Archetype fashion, he commits to making the snap, fully expecting it means his death—but then Pepper is there and Pepper has always been the one asking Tony to stop offering up his life to pay for some imaginary debt he thinks he owes. He hesitates, and it’s just long enough for Carol and Wanda swoop in, putting their hands on him and taking the brunt of the energy. Thor and Steve and Bruce and Clint pile on. Peter Parker links up, too, and on and on until the entire rest of the team, all across the battlefield, are in contact with each other and alight with power, channeling the energy of the six stones, keeping Thanos and his monsters at bay.

Tony can still have his ultra-badass “I am Iron Man” moment as he stands at the center of this surging and fluxing cosmic energy—but this time he does it with support. There are people who care about him (and each other) on all sides. And there are so many of them. Tony isn’t the only one who matters, he’s just the lynch pin that holds it all together.

Tony is Iron Man.

More importantly? Together they’re all the Avengers.

*SNAP*

The universe is set right.

Maybe Tony doesn’t escape entirely unscathed. Maybe he loses his arm as suggested by this post. Maybe the others all leave with their own scars, too. But Tony’s alive and he’s finally, deeply aware of what it means to transcend the limits of personal sacrifice and share the hero’s burden with others.

He knows now exactly what the Avengers are capable of. Oh, and by the way? That protective shield he wanted around the world in Age of Ultron? Here they all are. All these wonderful, powerful people are going to protect the Earth. And you know what? They don’t need Tony Stark’s myopic self-sacrifice to do it.

Tony finally feels like he’s done enough—and maybe now he believes there are other heroes out there who can do better than he can. Anyway, he gets to go home to Morgan and Pepper and he finds that it’s not so hard for him to let the new kids do the tough jobs now. He happily goes back to his role as “consultant” for the Avengers, he’s a mad inventor helping change the world for the better, and he also gets to have the long adventure of being a husband and a dad. He doesn’t have to choose one identity over the other—he’s Iron Man. He can redefine what the job means whenever he wants to.

(Also, he finds a way to rescue Nat because she didn’t deserve to be fridged like that. Just saying.)

This ending, or any number of variations like it, would have allowed Tony to finally show real growth at the end of his character arc, instead of succumbing to the same old self-destructive pattern we've seen from him time and time again. And it would have reinforced the theme of teamwork and its power to elevate all those who participate.

Maybe it’s cheesy, but you know what? It’s the ending I wanted. I know I’m not alone.

Tony’s Not Really Dead, You Say?

“There’s no need to be upset about Tony’s death,” some might say. “Tony’s gonna come back!”

Resurrection is a huge part of the Messianic Archetype—and it might be that the filmmakers do intend to bring Tony back in some later movie. It might be they simply want Tony’s death in Endgame to sit a little while longer so it has a greater impact. (Gotta push for that best picture Oscar, right? The Oscars hate superhero movies, but they do love a sad ending.)

While I’m wishing for things, maybe Marvel will also release the multiple alternate endings they filmed for Endgame, essentially creating a “choose your own adventure.” Maybe we’ll all be able to pick the ending we like best and forget the rest exist.

But I can’t make a judgement based on what might be, I can only say how I feel based on what we were given in the theater—for all intents and purposes, that’s the official story Marvel wants to share.

The Endgame narrative insists there’s only one possible path to victory against Thanos. The “one possible path” is basically the equivalent of the creative team saying, “Don’t @ me.” There certainly must have been an impossible number of endings they could have put on film. Tony’s death is the one they picked.

So, sorry for @ing you, Marvel, I guess, but there’s just one more point I want to make...

A Personal Note

RDJ acted the hell out of Tony's final scene. He acted the hell out of the whole franchise. Tony's death was powerful and intensely moving. I wanted to ugly cry in the lobby after the movie was over, and I was upset for days after.

So. Good job, Marvel. You got in some surprises and you wrung out some feelings from viewers like me. Now that the movie’s taken the world by storm, the surprises will play themselves out. So, I guess the big question is: Will audiences want to revisit this adventure and the feelings you ultimately left them with?

For me? My reluctant answer is: no. I don’t want to see Infinity War or Endgame again. Not really. Not in their entirety. I didn’t mind the slog through Infinity War in 2018 because I thought, Hey, maybe this is leading to an ultimately happy and satisfying conclusion for these characters I care about so much. And, to be fair—right up until the last 15 minutes of Endgame, I was ready to say, “All’s forgiven.”

There’s this thing in storytelling called “payoff.” It’s when you deliver a satisfying resolution or fulfillment to your audience after they commit to your narrative journey. Payoff can be extraordinarily subjective, so, again, I acknowledge that there’s no way to please everyone.

For me, there’s no reward in the resolution of Endgame that makes the slog to its conclusion worth it. Tony’s ending is so needlessly sacrificial, so unnecessarily brutal, that it erases much of the enjoyment I otherwise had in watching the entire rest of the film.

Don’t get me wrong. I like sad movies and scary movies in their own context. I like them when I can choose them and know that’s what I'm getting myself into. Sometimes I want the catharsis of being utterly terrified or brought to tears. Sometimes we need stories to give us the chance to feel deep and scary emotions in a safe environment. That’s an important function of creative work.

And, I mean, truly, Endgame gave us some great acting, great effects. Amazing talent. Really fun and creative moments. I’m not trying to disparage all the work that went into its making.

But I feel like someone took me in a limo to a high-class restaurant to eat caviar and watch sad arthouse theater when all I really wanted was to go into town with my friends for some ice cream and a fun movie.

I didn’t need rainbow-colored sprinkles on my ending, but something a bit sweeter would have been nice. So, well done, Marvel. But also—no, thank you.

As it stands, Endgame was too bitter for my taste.

#avengers #endgame #spoilers #negativity #long post #meta #my rambling #tony stark #iron man

68 notes · View notes

journeyintotheshelves · 6 years ago

Text

Back in April I took part in the O.W.L.s Magical Read-a-thon hosted by Book Roast on YouTube. Out of the twelve “exams,” I passed eight of them: Arithmancy, Care of Magical Creatures, Charms, Defense Against the Dark Arts, History of Magic, Muggle Studies, Potions, and Transfiguration. Which set me up perfectly for this month’s read-a-thon: the N.E.W.T.s! This was my favorite read-a-thon to participate in last year, and G has just made it bigger and better than ever, and I am so glad I can participate in it again this year.

The career framework that I’m using for the N.E.W.T.s is different from the one I used for the O.W.L.s back in April. Though I could still go for a Charms professor at Hogwarts, I’m actually planning on following the criteria path for a Ministry Worker, specifically for the Department of International Magic Cooperation. Which means I only need to get an Outstanding in one subject — History of Magic — and acceptable in five others: Muggle Studies, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Potions, Transfiguration, and Charms.

Since I have a bunch of ARCs that I want to get to over the next few months and start posting reviews again, I’m hoping to combine the N.E.W.T.s with ARC August to see just how much of my ARC backlog I can get through. I’m ridiculously excited for all of the books I want to read this month, so hopefully I can get to most, if not all of them (in a perfect world). I am going to the beach for a week at the end of the month, which means prime reading time. Last year, I read four books while I was on vacation, so hopefully I can repeat that this year.

History of Magic

Out of all of my exams for this round of the N.E.W.T.s, History of Magic is the only one that I have to achieve an “Outstanding” to complete my career path. So did I choose easy books to complete it? Of course not! Why would I be kind to myself like that? However, I’m fairly certain that each of these books are going to be five stars, so I’m not too worried.

ACCEPTABLE: Read a fantasy

A Darker Shade of Magic (Shades of Magic: 1): V.E. Schwab

Despite the fact that I own a bunch of V.E. (Victoria) Schwab books, I haven’t read a single one. A Darker Shade of Magic is one of my Top 10 Books to Read in 2019, and I think it’s finally time to dive into some of Schwab’s work.

EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS: Read a book that includes a map

Darkdawn (The Nevernight Chronicle: 3): Jay Kristoff Publication date: September 3rd

I’m currently in the middle of reading Godsgrave right now and am falling more in love with this story as I read every page. I cannot believe that I’m lucky enough to have an ARC of this highly anticipated finale, and I can’t wait to read it as soon as I can.

OUTSTANDING: Tom Riddle’s Diary: fond memory — reread a favorite (or a classic)

Wuthering Heights: Emily Brontë

I read Wuthering Heights for the first (and only) time back when I was a sophomore in high school and fell in love with the story. I’ve been meaning to reread this story for ages, especially since so many people I’ve talked to hate this book. I’m interested to see if I still feel the same about the story of Heathcliff and Catherine all these years later.

Muggle Studies

For my chosen career path, I only have to read the book for an acceptable grade for this exam. But I’m a bit extra motivated to get an “Outstanding” in Muggle Studies since one of these books was on my N.E.W.T.s TBR last year and didn’t get it to then, so it must happen this year.

ACCEPTABLE: Cover that includes an actual photo element

The Girl the Sea Gave Back: Adrienne Young Publication date: September 3rd

This one is a complete surprise addition to my TBR this month. But the Netgalley fairies (and the ones at St. Martin’s Press) granted my wish and I can read it early! I’m a sucker for books with a big mythology aspect, so I cannot wait to dive into this one (pun fully intended).

EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS: Book set in our real world

Permanent Record: Mary H.K. Choi Publication date: September 3rd

The world needs more books about college-aged people that aren’t set at a college, so I’m so excited that I get the chance to read Permanent Record. I’ve heard nothing but great things about Mary H.K. Choi’s last novel, Emergency Contact, so I’m intrigued to see how I like her newest novel.

OUTSTANDING: Book written by a person of color

A Very Large Expanse of Sea: Tahereh Mafi

If you’re having déjà vu reading this, trust me you’re not alone. This isn’t the first TBR that I’ve included A Very Large Expanse of Sea, but I definitely want it to be the last. I saw Tahereh Mafi at Epic Reads Day in July, and hearing her speak about this book and what it meant to her made me want to read it that much more.

Defense Against the Dark Arts

Like with Muggle Studies, I only have to read the book I chose for an “Acceptable” grade to complete the requirements for my chosen career path. However, all three books I’ve chosen for these prompts have been on my TBR for waaaay too long, and I think it’s time to change that.

ACCEPTABLE: Book that’s black under the dust jacket (only one necessary for my chosen career)

Legend (Legend: 1): Marie Lu

Why finish a Marie Lu series when I can keep starting them? Even though I do really want to finish her Warcross and Young Elites series, I do want to try and read her debut series; especially since Rebel, the continuation of this series, comes out in October.

EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS: Gilderoy’s memory charm — first book you remembered from your TBR

Heretics Anonymous: Katie Henry

I’ve been dying to read this book since it came out last year. I love books that deal with philosophy and religion, especially if they’re done in a humorous way.

OUTSTANDING: Cornish pixie! Swat it away with a book written by an English author or set in England

Heartstopper, Volume 1: Alice Oseman

So, technically this is a reread for me since I’ve been reading Heartstopper as a webcomic since the beginning. But, I do love this story and Nick and Charlie are just so unbelievably adorable. This will be the perfect book to squeeze between some of my darker fantasies that I hope to read this month to lighten the mood.

Potions

Potions is going to my hardest N.E.W.T. to pass with an “Outstanding” grade. All three books are fantasy over 400 pages each. But, I won’t let that deter me and sometimes a fantasy is just the perfect beach read.

ACCEPTABLE: Polyjuice potion — read your friend’s favorite book

The Princess Bride: William Goldman

Asking my friend Nicole for her favorite book was absolutely terrible. Like most bookworms, she gave me a list of about ten books about twenty minutes after I asked her. Fortunately, I read most of the books that she suggested, with the exception of The Princess Bride. I have seen the movie once and liked it, so I’m interested to see how the book and movie differ. Hopefully it has the same humor as the movie does because that was just pure gold.

EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS: House ingredient –– book with a cover in your Hogwarts house colors (Hufflepuff — yellow & black)

Serpent & Dove (Serpent & Dove: 1): Shelby Mahurin Publication date: September 3rd

I’ve been in love with this book ever since I saw the cover reveal a couple of months ago. And then I heard Shelby Mahurin speak about the story and fell in love even more. Give me all of the books with a fake dating — in this case a fake marriage — trope.

OUTSTANDING: Book that starts with a prologue

The Chosen (Contender: 1): Taran Matharu

I haven’t read any Taran Matharu before, but this one sounds like a great sci-fi/fantasy book. From the synopsis, I’m getting Matrix vibes and I cannot wait to see how this story unfolds.

Transfiguration

Just like for Potions, in order to complete the tests for my chosen career path, I only have to achieve an “Acceptable.” Also like Potions, the books I chose for these prompts are all dense fantasy; but they’re all stories I’m excited to read.

ACCEPTABLE: Read a book with LGBTQIA+ representation

Girls of Paper and Fire (Girls of Paper and Fire: 1): Natasha Ngan

Just like A Very Large Expanse of Sea, Girls of Paper and Fire has been on multiple previous TBRs. Hopefully, that streak comes to an end this month. I’ve heard nothing but fantastic things about this novel, so I really hope I can join in on this bandwagon ASAP.

EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS: Read a book that’s not a first in the series

Blue Lily, Lily Blue (The Raven Cycle: 3): Maggie Stiefvater

Over the past few years, I’ve been slowly getting through Maggie Stiefvater’s The Raven Cycle. I’ve loved the first two books in the series, so I’ve been taking my time and savoring every moment. But, since her latest novel, Call Down the Hawk is related to this series (but not a direct sequel), I really want to catch up on this series before November.

OUTSTANDING: McGonagall doesn’t mess around! — Read a book over 500 pages

Angel Mage: Garth Nix Publication date: October 1st

Despite being a huge YA fantasy name, I have yet to read a single Garth Nix book. I am more than ready to finally read something by him, and I think that, since this is a standalone, this is the perfect place to start.

Charms

Out of all of my “exams,” Charms is the only one that I’m pretty confident that I can complete this month. With a graphic novel, a manga, and a short story collection that I need to read and review for a post next month, these books are more likely to happen than any of the others on this entire list.

ACCEPTABLE: A book with a gorgeous cover

His Hideous Heart: 13 of Edgar Allan Poe’s Most Unsettling Tales Reimagined: Dahlia Adler [Editor] Publication date: September 10th

I’m not a big anthology fan, but I’m ridiculously excited for this one. Edgar Allan Poe is one of my favorite authors of all time, so I cannot wait to see how his stories and themes are reimagined and interpreted.

EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS: Read a comic/graphic novel/manga (or a book under 150 pages)

Dreamin’ Sun, Vol. 9: Ichigo Takano

I don’t read much manga, but when I do it’s one of three series. There are only two volumes of Dreamin’ Sun left and I’m so sad to see this series end.

OUTSTANDING: Spongify (softening charm) — Read a paperback book

Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up with Me: Mariko Tamaki & Rosemary Valero-O’Connell

Just from flipping through this book, I know I’m going to love it in part just because the art is stunning. Stories about difficult relationships, especially in YA fiction, are always something I’m looking for, so I can’t wait to read this one.

Because I’m an overachiever, I hope to “pass” the other N.E.W.T.s that I can sit this year — Charms, Arithmancy, and Care of Magical Creatures. I make no promises, but after the past few decent reading months, I’m having a good feeling about August.

Arithmancy

ACCEPTABLE: Book that ends on an even page number

Frankly in Love: David Yoon Publication date: September 10th

I will say this every time, but I LOVE FAKE DATING TROPES AND I WILL ALWAYS READ THEM.

EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS: Read a standalone

Jackpot: Nic Stone Publication date: October 15th

I am so so so glad that I have an ARC of this book. I loved Nic Stone’s Dear Martin, and she’s such a fantastic person. I love her voice, and I cannot wait to read another one of her stories.

OUTSTANDING: Book that’s longer than 350 pages

The Beautiful (The Beautiful: 1): Renée Ahdieh Publication date: October 8th

Vampires are back in YA literature; we are thriving in 2019, ladies and gentlemen. I’ve only read one of Renée Ahdieh’s books before, but I loved her writing style and structure, so I can’t wait to see how that translates to vampiric 1870s New Orleans.

Care of Magical Creatures

ACCEPTABLE: Follow the spiders! — Book title that starts with the letter ‘A’ for Aragog!

Ash: Malinda Lo

I literally scoured my shelves, and this is the only book that I have that starts with ‘A’ that I haven’t read already. I only picked this up a few months ago, but I’m always game for a fairytale retelling, especially when it’s a LGBTQIA+ retelling.

EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS: Book under 300 pages

Girls on the Verge: Sharon Briggs Waller

Ever since I watched Chelsea from chelseadolling reads on YouTube rave about this book months ago, I’ve wanted to read this book. Even though it’s a short book, I have a feeling this is going to be a difficult read, but so very worth it.

OUTSTANDING: Grab onto Fawkes’ tail! — Read a book with a bird on the cover

Black Wings Beating (Skybound: 1): Alex London

I don’t know much about this book other than it’s a LGBTQIA+ fantasy. But, I’ve also heard nothing but good things about this book from those who have read it. Since the sequel is coming out soon, hopefully I can jump on this train quickly and pick up the sequel, too.

It's August, so you know what that means....time for the N.E.W.T.s! I'm so pumped for all the books on my TBR this month. With luck, I'll pass all my exams needed to be a Ministry Worker! Check out my #NEWTSReadathon2019 TBR here: Back in April I took part in the O.W.L.s Magical Read-a-thon hosted by Book Roast on YouTube…

#books #N.E.W.T.s Magical Read-a-thon #Read-a-thon #TBR

5 notes · View notes

filmcave · 6 years ago

Text

Not the Same

There is an unusual battle going on right now in the world of cinema. But it also acts as a microcosm and sort of shard of a hologram for other battles happening.

Like every battle there plusses and minuses to each side and naturally the other side sees each other as a kind of threat.

At its core is a philosophical question: Does size matter? The Sophomoric and silly undertones of sexual innuendo aside in this question, it is entirely genuine.

When Louis and Auguste Lumiere screened the first public movie ever in 1895, at the Grand Cafe in Paris, certainly the size of the screen was not the fascination. How could it be? The magic of the moment was seeing flickering light and shadow images dancing on a plain surface transporting the audience to another place and time.

Employees leaving the Factory (in Lyon)

What an incredible moment and experience this mst have been for this audience. Even if they could not have sensed the economic and cultural impact, they were seeing something no one had publicly seen before.

The “moving pictures” were the attraction. The fascination, fear and amazement they felt must have been palpable. This was not an innovation in cinema, it was the creation of it!

From that point forward changes in the production, distribution, performance and experience of cinema are all that was left.

And we know that those changes have proliferated and in many cases advanced film. With the exception of one area - film analysis and discussion. This area has languished in the scrap heap of literary criticism. This is not to say people don’t have or choose not to 'advertise their opinions (far from it). As a conglomerate of disciples of film critics commentary has de-evolved and been reduced to a range of thoughts that can be best described as the binary “I liked it” / “I didn’t like it” dialectic. Yawn, how uninteresting.

When this is typically combined with a lack of understanding of that “that on the screen” came to be the discussion becomes an exercise in auto asphyxiation. Straining and stressing under the weight of its own limitations.

If we begin to look at the individual components of “how its made” we can chart a path towards understanding better the purpose and mission of the film. Most people depart the cinema soon after the final shot of the story. But even as they leave they are well aware there is a very long line of credits. In so e simple sense they probably understand that each one of those people played a role in the creation of that film. But a movie is Spam in a can, if it never gets shown.

This is the point where the evil genius of Netflix enters. Over the 120+ years that cinema has been made public. Many advancements in the movie going experience (and dubious ones) have been cauterized by a single ethic of the social contract. A movie goer needed to get off their fat ass and find their way to an actual physical theatre, buy a ticket and watch the movie in the temporary co-habitation with strangers.

At one point in time the cinemas who screened these films figuratively had a captive audience. There was one or two cinemas in town. They showed one movie for an entire week and then it was gone. Limited supply (number of seats, days and films) made for high demand. People dressed up and went in droves. The film studios owned the theaters, production equipment and the actors were “under contract”. It was an oligarchy of the wealthy. They had immense power and influence.

This power began to fade as independent distributors and cinemas began to crop up. Like in professional athletics actors became free agents where they could take their skills and reputations where they wished. Unions formed and the power dissipated. The website statista estimates the global film industry will be $50 billion dollars in 2020. Thats a pie a lot of people would like to stick their snout into.

Enter Netflix et al. Otherwise known as the Satans of Silicon Valley. Before I pontificate on SVS it might be helpful to philosophize on the question of what kind of value they bring to this world to begin with.

To begin with they are a society. An insulated, top down culture presided over by people with certain kinds of brilliant intellect and intelligence around a few extremely limited things. On top of this there is a self perception that is also pointed outwards as a marketing message cum “social good”. For them to see themselves as valuable parts of society at large they must perpetuate and proselytize this ethic/message. It is a nearly completely corrupt mentality especially devoid of emotional intelligence and a genuine sense of greater good. For many of the FANG stocks (a prescient acronym for Facebook, Apple (Amazon), Netflix, Google) the trick is to write some code, give it to a “user” for free and then have that user do all the work to build a successful revenue generating business. Its genius and entirely immoral. The users are the product, they develop and refine the product, allow a given company to take or steal their information which that company can then use to sell shit right back to them In the words of Karl Marx, the workers are the means of production AND the product.

Allthe company needs to do is continue to convince the users they need to keep working. They fo this by “engaging them” in things that touch in fears, dreams, hopes and deficiencies.

Ok, so a bit of a deviation here but the core point, relative to our topic of screen size, is to examine what value (if any) Netflix is bringing to the movie game.

Lets start with their motivation. First, middle and last Netflix is a growth and consumption machine. But if we look at the content they “recommend” it is created, design and directed to appeal to YOU. Their business wet dream is to have you intravenously fed chemically and neurologically customized euphoric content. Like the masses in The Matrix they need you to have a stable income and an all you can eat mentality. Why else would they continue to push new movies and episodes having them start before the last has finished.

So, how about the quality of said content. Well, financially speaking, they are agnostic on that. However, to steal your attention away from other content (including real life) they need to convince you its better.

This is where awards come to play. Any kind of award will do but of course when you’re talking about insatiable appetites, you’re talking the big awards. Golden Globes, Grammy’s, Oscars. And winners from the elite festivals. And when you’re taking in obscene amounts of cash, there’s lots to spend..and spend they do. For many years Amazon was a money losing venture. Not any more.

According to Statista Amazons Q4 revenue in 2018 was $72.38 billion

Apple - $62.9 B in the same period

Netflix - $4.19 B

Google - $33.7 B (reported for Q3 as parent company Alphabet)

Those four quarterly revenue streams combined (over $173 billionj is more than the annual GDP in Rhode Island, Vermont and New Hampshire.

So, yeah...its all about the Benjamins

Right. So no surprise there. Its not illegal to make money.

But this is the kernal of the issue for chain cinemas. Netflix is taking revenue from them.

Lets look at the core matter regarding quality of work. At this point the poster chold for this is the astounding and impressive film: Roma.

Its is the brainchild of Alfonso Cuarón and it is making waves (if you’ve seen it this is a pun) because of the awards and recognition is has garnered but also by the way Netflix has accomplished it. They have a brilliant beautiful film on their hands the credit to which needs to firmly given to them. They are exploiting the opportunity to attract filmmakers by giving them broad artistic license and backing movies studios shy away from or don’t support due to a personal beef with the artists.

So far as this empowerment to the creators I say “good for you Netflix”. It is certainly their right to distribute it in whichever wsy and to the degree they wish. Its their toy. Obviously it gives them a monopoly in who sees it when its not in cinemas - their customers. This cultural shift might be upsetting or off putting to many for many reasons. But the notion of adopting technologies that already exist comes to mind.

Some credit does need to be accorded to Netflix. They fully funded the vision and sensibility of a Director, cast and crew and single handedly provided access to an extraordinary mvie to millions of people who might not otherwise have access to see it. Kudos.

However...

I first saw Roma on my large screen TV and loved it. I begrudgingly gave credit to Netflix for this coup. But...it haunted me and got me to thinking. The “what about” questions began to creep to my consciousness. It was too good and I wanted more. But the “tiny” 45” screen and schmaltzy TV speakers were incapable of delivering the full, Director intended experience.

But I was stuck. Netflix had cleverly rigged the game. To qualify for the Oscars, the film needed to be shown on a movie house screen in a minimum number of locations. Netflix complied - but barely.. And so, under carefully controlled limited release it was made available. But if you have the misfortune of not being close enough to a legitimate movie screen, you were out of luck. Nay, this lack of good fortune extended further when I learned there were a few 70 mm high definition sound copies out there.

For a cinephile, large screen format is nirvana. Seeing a movie conceived, shot and meant for a large screen is an experience irreplaceable. It can’t be recreated anywhere else.

So sticking this instant classic into a small screen is like telling a great writer they can only use half the alphabet. A musician half the notes. Or a chef food but no spices. Whats the point of trying?

If Netflix wishes to keep its toys to itself, so be it. But really how much farther do they think they have advanced cinema beyond Employees leaving the Factory. Not very far to me.

And watching an epic film like Roma on anything other screen than a large cinema screen, with stereo sound...not the same.

2 notes · View notes

skyler-bane · 3 years ago

Note

1, 2, 6, 7, 9- warrioroflondonbelow 💕

Interesting Questions for Muns

1. Would you say that ever since you started writing for your muse you have become more similar to your muse? In what ways?

There’s no way he’ll ever teach me how to ignore/give people what they deserve every time I clearly should, I’ll always make exceptions when it’s someone I care about, but I’ve adopted this “eye for an eye but no hard feelings, darling” attitude. I’ve got more confidence, in the sense that I care less about “what ifs” and more about what I want/like/etc. And, I’m sorry, but I’m sure my friends hear more puns now...

2. Do you self-project yourself into your muse? If so, then how?

Ouch, do I? Because I truly don’t know... Not really? Would that even be on purpose? Everything sounds far-fetched to me, so I guess the answer is no.

6. If your muse came to life, do you think you would get along with them?

Yes because we’d finally have company for The Matrix trilogy rewatch evening every week 😂

I really hope that the answer is yes because he’s a FUN guy. I’m sure I’d say yes to all the crazy ideas because he’s always got a backup plan and getting into trouble with him is safe. xD Then again, he’s a tiny bit too cute for a friend, so, as you can see, this question is a definition of thin ice </3 Stay right there, Skyler. Stay right there.

7. Would you say that your attitude changes when you get 'into the zone' of writing your muse? (ex: when you write for your muse do you begin to sort of talk like them? do you find yourself feeling grumpy after? etc)

YES, I swear more 😂 and get that grumpy ‘everybody fuck off’ attitude or the opposite – don’t be serious because life isn’t serious – after fun replies. I’m surprised that sometimes, I also end up with this very analytical way of thinking, a What Would Skyler Do kind of troubleshooting mode and, let me tell you, those plans are always genius lol

9. Has your muse taught you anything about yourself and/or the world?

That no matter how wonderful people you might have around you, everything in your life depends on you you & YOU. It’s always you vs the world and no one can live your life for you, so just say fuck it (”No, but you gotta say it.”) and do your thing (I’d add sth like “as long as you don’t hurt other people” but Skyler yelled NONSENSE!). Oh, and that it’s good to be a little bit selfish because if you count on other people’s good hearts you get your ass whipped and you can only be mad at yourself.

#//i'd die for a real like Skyler because this guy is chaos on two legs #real life - too lazy to go there and fix that typo #skyler would but i won't nope

0 notes

fictionerd · 7 years ago

Text

Good to see you, friends!

“WHAT’S THIS!? This isn’t Uma Musume! Fictionerd! Explain yourself!”

Well. I watched this week’s Uma Musume and as I did I had this sinking sensation. The episode didn’t really move me to dig in depth into it the way I have my other long-form posts. So I instead went to watch this week’s episode of Caligula and scrape my scales and call me Seath if it wasn’t about a thousand times better. So let’s all take a deep dive into Episode six of Caligula.

WARNING! I ENGAGE IN A LOT OF SPECULATION THAT MAY BE OFF THE MARK. I REPEAT A COUPLE TIMES IN THE POST BELOW, BUT LET’S GO AHEAD AND GET IT RIGHT OUT FRONT! PLEASE NO SPOILERS FOR THE STORY MOVING FORWARD FROM THOSE WHO’VE PLAYED THE GAME(S). THANK YOU.

We open on Mu preparing the first song of the night aimed at activating the digi-heads and allowing the Musicians to combat the rogues. We get an inkling of how she’s being manipulated by this Thorn character. Her Utopia has been hijacked by the musicians who seem intent upon living within their own delusions for all eternity.

We then get a series of quick establishing scenes showing the various characters and the situations they open in. Ritsu, Kotaro, and Kotono are still at the weird water-world place facing down Dom lady. Mifue and Naruko are where we left them last episode: with the first fake mom Mifue had in Mobius. Suzuna has run into newcomer Izuru and together they are cornered by another of the Musicians who has watched too many action movies and dual-wields massive sub-machine guns. Shogo just barely escapes the digi-heads by ducking into an elevator. We get a brief flash of what appears to be a girl jumping off a building before the elevator stops to reveal the white-haired speaker kid from the first episode. It seems like everyone who’s noticed the world is the matrix is in deep trouble.

After the OP we jump right back into the action with Kotono using her Catharsis effect to fight Dom Lady. The results are lack-luster with Dom flat-out batting away every arrow Kotono throws at her, even when she throws up to four at a time. They take a break from fighting to compare Mobius to an aquarium. Kotono’s all like, “This whole place is fake. I want my real crappy life back!” Dom lady snorts and says, “You’re a moron. Why would you want that sucky real world where you have to work for stuff when you could just stay here and let Mu brainwash you into thinking everything is absolutely perfect?”

I don’t know about Kotono, but my immediate response would be something along the lines of: “Because living in a world where everything is just handed to you is completely asinine, and would lead to the sort of stagnation you normally only get from full-on clinical depression.”

Enough of that scene, though, let’s catch up with Mifue and Naruko. They try calling Shogo to no avail. Sorry, ladies, he’s found himself in a situation he can’t just “cut” out of. You know how it is. You run into an acquaintance from school and they just demand you “Shoot the shit” with them. (I brought up his scene early just to make those puns and I’m not sorry).

Crazy, Pixie Dude shows up and is all like, “Hey you two. Since you know my secret identity I’m going to shame you for your own petty sorrows. Glasses-chick wants to be internet-famous and blandy hates fat people, right? Ooh I do love touching nerves. What you mad? Too bad you can do jack all about it!”

I have serious concerns about the directions they might take this guy in because of the whole “overweight dude living as a cute girl thing”. That’s one fucking minefield of a subject matter that I’d prefer to avoid until and unless we learn more about why he went with that. Depending on how it shakes out there could be some serious problems there. (Oh who am I kidding? There’s going to be serious problems with that character regardless.)

Once more I feel the need to alert those who’ve played the games ahead of time: NO SPOILERS PLEASE. I don’t CARE how the game handled it, because I’m watching the anime.

Okay! Enough of that aside: Back to the fight between Kotono and Dom. They basically continue their conversation from before and Kotono’s ranged attacks continue to be largely ineffectual. I’ve gotta say she seems to have gotten the “Shaft” on this particular matchup. (Jesus why am I doing this?)

Kotaro tries to get Aria to Cathars him up some beatin sticks, but she’s all like. “Sorry, bro, you’ve not got enough edge to work with.” Ritsu, realizing that they’re basically dead weight advises him to run and he’s all like, “But why?”

“Because they keep damaging those tanks and I don’t want to drown, That’s Why!” So they do and then we cut to the source of my puns from before where Crazy-eyes White-hair is trying to make several points to Shogo all at once with what appears to less be a sword and more a collection of random serrations. Fortunately Shogo’s Dirty Harry special is a functional parrying weapon, but his stance is basically shit so he keeps getting thrown around.

I’m seriously confused as to why he’s suddenly at such a disadvantage. Isn’t he somewhat experienced at this? Shouldn’t he at least be able to keep his footing?

Whatever, We jump back to Thorn and Mu who kinda snaps out of a trance.

“Girl whose name is not at all suspicious, why does it feel like the people I brought to my stately pleasure dome are all in pain and anguish?” “We call it tough love.” “Okay then, if you say so.”

And we move on. Wannabe Action Star has cornered Suzuna and Izuru and tries to be all intimidating just to strike out horribly and make Izuru look badass for just staring the punk down as a bullet grazes his cheek. (I’m assuming he got better build up to his introduction in the game. That or I just didn’t notice him in the insanity that were the opening episodes of the series.

At this point the various scenes from around Mobius start to converge in their tone. It’s essentially -

Musicians: This world is perfect! We don’t have to worry about things being hard or frustrating ever again! Rogues: That’s just running away. Sure I may regret this decision later, but I’d rather take a chance at having something real than play pretend forever! Musicians: It’s not pretend so long as we stay here it’s all real! RAAAR

The reason we see the scenes basically bleed together is because Aria is suddenly getting a serious mainline of feels from all the protagonists. She hovers up into the air and begins to glow with an awesome power. “I can feel it! Everyone’s Existential Angst is flowing into me. OH NO!”

And she gets pwned by the shockwave off Dom-lady’s mace. Kotaro runs over to her. We see Mu realizing her friend is still around, but that’s over fast. Then Kotaro picks Aria up and gets teary-eyed, Presumably out of fear that he’ll never get to see what she looks like as a human-proportioned Vocaloid rather than a chibi. Dom calls him a weakling and he’s like, “No I’m not [emphatic pause] Yes I am.” [Sob] Then a few not-so-manly tears fall down his cheeks and splash onto Aria who’s all like, “NOW THAT’S WHAT I CALL EDGE!”

She turns into an orange star of “Battle Them” and everyone follows the light while internally screaming in anguish. Aria bundles up all those Feels and everyone but Ritsu undergoes the Catharsis transformation at once. The sudden realization that so many people didn’t like playing in her doll house makes Mu’s record skip before she, too, gives in to the edge. With ten minutes left in the episode we get our title card and all the protags are like, “Sweet threads! Thanks, Aria, now we can whoop some ass.”

And that’s exactly what they do. Maybe I’m just spoiled from watching Megalo Box last night, but up until this point I didn’t think the fighting in this had been much to write home about, but the big battle at the end between the Rogues and the Musicians was pretty cool. I sort of want to skip to the end at this point, but there’s something I need to touch on first. Remember when I mentioned Shogo’s Elevator flashback? The main reason I remember it is because when he’s asked why he wants to go back to the real world so bad he says “Because I’m a Murderer.”

Again No Spoilers! but I can’t help suspecting that he’s blaming himself for something he didn’t have much power to stop. Okay, subject addressed back to the fight.

Ritsu’s the only one who hasn’t impaled himself on his feels, and he’s struggling with this whole “Determination to keep fighting” thing. Everyone around him doesn’t just want to go home, they’re fighting for it. Just as he’s wondering what exactly he is and what he could have to fight for Mu descends from the heavens. She’s basically having a mental breakdown because she doesn’t understand why everyone won’t just let her make them happy. She’s taken all their pain and suffering and made them her problem. That sort of Empathy and desire to help others is admirable, but she’s handling it in the absolute wrong way. She’s trying to help them forget about their pains rather than face them. She’s basically gotten to the point where she’s angry at them for not being grateful for what she’s done. She doesn’t realize that she’s ultimately done more harm than good.

When she just LOSES IT! Words don’t suffice. It needs to be WATCHED.

So she starts overflowing with all the negative emotions she’s been taking from everyone and bottling up inside herself. She can’t hold back and has to lash out. Ritsu sees this, but not I think as the threat everyone else might see it as. He sees the pain that Mu’s in. He sees how misguided and delusional her quest is, and this gives him his motivation. He’s going to stand against Mobius, not for himself, but for her sake. Maintaining Mobius is obviously doing just as much harm to Mu as it is to everyone she’s keeping brainwashed.

So Ritsu fires a massive FEELS BEAM at the giant ball of EDGE Mu has accumulated and seemingly dissipates it. As Thorn flies(?) off with Mu in her arms Mu calls Ritsu a Jerk.

Post-credits scene all the Rogues decide to team up and officially name themselves the “Go-Home Club”. (Which honestly is probably the best and worst pun of them all).

Question! How the heck are you supposed to use club activities to “hide” what you’re doing? The Musicians know who you all are already! What are you worried about sucking other people in? Why?

Ugh, I guess I’ll find out as things go on. Now, if you’ll excuse me, this post may be late getting to bed, but so am I. Hopefully the next two days of playing catch-up will go smoother than this.

Until next post, keep talking fiction, friends! I’ll see you soon.

#Anime #Caligula #Episode 6 #Fictionerd #Let's Talk Anime

5 notes · View notes

neuxue · 7 years ago

Text

Wheel of Time liveblogging: The Gathering Storm ch 21

All in all a mixed bag of a chapter, in which Perrin reaches some decisions and Faile remembers, I still dislike Rolan, and Borderland sayings are A Problem for me

Chapter 21: Embers and Ash

Last weekend, I went to my favourite bookstore and bought an actual, physical, hardcover book for the first time in years. That book was The Book Of Dust Volume One: La Belle Sauvage by Philip Pullman. The first book of the companion series to His Dark Materials, the final book of which I queued for (and then promptly devoured) at a different bookstore, seventeen long years ago. Some of you may know the extent to which my love for this series is deep and abiding; the rest of you need only know that it was my Hogwarts letter and my magic wardrobe and my invitation to the world of magic and fantasy and wonder all rolled into one, and my love for it is deep and abiding.

I was never, until around this time last year, sure that we would ever be getting The Book of Dust. (In honesty, there have been times where I was unsure whether I wanted it; I’ve always been a bit skeptical of post-facto additions to canon). But now suddenly it’s here¸and I have it in my hand, and after a week of it taunting me from the bookshelf I finally have a few hours in which I can sit down and get some reading done.

Why am I telling you this story? So you will understand the LEVEL OF COMMITMENT I AM MAKING when I say that I have decided I’m not allowed to read La Belle Sauvage until I get at least through chapter 22 of The Gathering Storm. Which means I may never get to read La Belle Sauvage, because Chapter 22 is the one you all keep telling me will kill me.

But THIS IS MY PROMISE, AND I WILL KEEP TO IT, BY MY HOPE OF SALVATION AND REBIRTH.

So here we are. Chapter 21: Embers and Ash. And I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t point out that that’s a lovely chapter title. I’m not usually one for ranking favourites of things because usually I fail miserably, but once I’ve finished the series I might have to go through and rank all the chapter titles in order of awesome.

Perrin opened his eyes and found himself hanging in the air.

Oh great, we’ve moved beyond even cliffs and garden walls. Levelling up and NOT IN A GOOD WAY. LEVEL DOWN. ABORT. ABORT.

He felt a spike of terror, floundering in the sky.

I’d say ‘at least his survival instinct is intact’ but the past…oh…ten books or so have proved that to be utterly false.

(I say this as someone whose frequent activities include rock-climbing and flying trapeze, and whose recent google searches include ‘bungee jumping near London’ and ‘skydiving prices London’ so it’s possible I’m a hypocrite).

He waved his arms reflexively, as if to swim

Yeah I know swimming is my first instinct when suspended in midair as well, Perrin. Seriously, what the fuck? Also the more I think about it, the more hilarious this whole image is to me. Someone skilled at art and/or gif-making, please make some kind of visual representation of Perrin doggy-paddling in midair. In his pyjamas.

Well what do you know, we’re in the wolf dream. And after Perrin’s last chapter I’m optimistic that maybe he’ll finally commit to it properly. He’s danced on the edge of learning to use Tel’aran’rhiod since TDR and it’s about time for him to enroll in an actual crash course.

Pun only somewhat intended.

He took a deep breath, then closed his eyes and imagined himself jumping.

It’s okay, everybody falls the first time.

Nope, not Perrin. Perrin wins the Matrix Tel’aran’rhiod and sticks his landing perfectly.

This time, those dark storm clouds remained. They boiled, spun, and shot lines of lightning between different thunderheads.

The true difference between Sanderson and Jordan: Sanderson capitalises everything and Jordan pluralises ‘lightning’.

But the storm is not transient, not even here in Tel’aran’rhiod.

Actually, the interesting thing is that it’s not transient in Tel’aran’rhiod, where most things are, but it is mercurial and unpredictable in the real world. Those black and silver clouds from the prologue that hovered in the distance, then appeared instantaneously overhead, then vanished again…it’s a perfect reversal of how things are supposed to be. A storm whose reflection in the World of Dreams shows its gravity and permanence, while in the real world it is terrifying in part for its caprice. But even in the real world, it is not fading or vanishing or blowing over easily. The storm is gathering and everything is darkening and lightning hovers on the horizon, as it does here as a now-permanent feature in the skies of dreams.

It comes, Hopper agreed. If Shadowkiller falls to the storm, all will sleep forever.

If he falls to the storm. “I am the storm.” It’s not so much a question of whether Rand will be hit by the storm when it breaks as it is a question of whether he will be consumed by it, inside and out. “There is a rage in him fit to burn the world, and he holds it by a hair.” There is so little holding him back now, and so much power and anger within him. Master of the lightnings, rider on the storm. I’ve always linked Rand to the wind from the beginning of each book, for some reason (well, I know why I’ve made the link in my head; whether it was intended by Jordan is a different question but I’m inclined to think so), but now even that wind has become a tempest, and this time there was something wrong with the wind, and there is a storm gathering and Rand stands at the centre of it, and walks a razor’s edge between commanding it and being consumed by it, destroyed from the inside.

Perrin’s confused. It’s okay, Perrin. When you get home from dreamworld, just google ‘pathetic fallacy’ and also maybe ‘fisher king’ and things will start to make sense.

Or just when in doubt apocalypse.

Two legs, Young Bull? Two legs are slow!

Excuse you, ~legs are required for jumping, dancing, strolling along on those…what’s that word again? streets……~

“I have to keep control, Hopper,” he said. “When I let the wolf take control…well, I do dangerous things.”

Ah yes, this again.

Although, having said that, this actually isn’t a trope I get tired of, for the most part. This question of control, and the fear of losing it balanced against the knowledge of or desire for the power that such a surrender could bring; the fear of what lies beneath the surface, of what hides beneath who you want to be and curls itself around who you are; the navigation of lines and boundaries and balance.

Perrin wants control, but what he needs is something closer to balance, and understanding. And the desire for control, and the almost instinctive reaching for it feels more like a kind of denial. There is something within him that he fears, something within him that clashes with who he wants to be or thinks he needs to be, and so instead of allowing himself to explore and understand it, he suppresses it, denies that part of himself, and calls this control. And it feels like control, on the surface. But it isn’t; true control can’t be gained by simply suppressing. It comes more from knowing and accepting and understanding, from the ability to balance.

It’s not unlike Nynaeve and her block. She was, on some level, afraid of the power she had, and so she shut it away from herself, so that she could only access it when anger eroded those barriers. She could only access it when she ‘lost control’. But it wasn’t until she learned to surrender and accept that she was able to learn true control. To embrace the Power as a part of herself, and guide it as she willed.

That’s the difference, it seems to me. You can suppress something, and refuse to look at it, and hold it at bay with as much willpower as you can muster, and if you’re lucky it might not break through the barriers you’ve built and wreak havoc. (It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy, in that way. If ‘losing control’ means letting this thing run rampant, unable to do anything to guide it or mitigate it because you’ve spent all your time and energy trying to push it away, then losing control is indeed something to fear). Or, you can do the much more difficult thing, and look it in the eyes and know what it is and learn how to use it, or how to accept it as a part of yourself, which is a very different (but arguably more effective) kind of control. It’s a control that comes from balance, rather than its absence.

But that’s what I see as Perrin’s issue. He’s always been afraid of losing control to the wolf, and because of that fear he’s never allowed himself to actually explore the wolf aspect of himself. So he doesn’t fully understand it, and yet he can’t rid himself of it, so he ends up in this ongoing situation where he tries to hold it at bay but invariably can’t do that permanently, which leads to these moments of ‘losing control’, which only serves to exacerbate the fear, which…oh hey there vicious circle.

Hopper, meanwhile, is attempting to convey either ‘please find some chill’ or ‘I have no idea what you’re talking about’ with a single expression.

There were wonderful things about what had happened to him since leaving the Two Rivers.

But he couldn’t continue to lose control. He had to find a balance.

Yeah, pretty much. Well done for articulating that to yourself, Perrin. And I think finding that balance will go a long way towards solving the issue of control. But we shall see.

Throwing away the axe had made a difference. The axe and the hammer were different weapons –one could be used only for killing, while the other gave him a choice.

I think I liked this better when it was just implied, rather than stated outright. There have been a few times, now, where I’ve felt this way in this book. I think in part it’s a Sanderson thing, because it feels very like how he handles some of this in his own books. Only there, it’s consistent with the overall storytelling method, and characters, and modes of characterisation, so I don’t particularly mind it. My personal preference is for things to be left a bit more open, and for authors to leave more to the reader, but I think in his own works Sanderson is certainly able to leave enough unsaid that the things he does explain clearly – usually pertaining more to characters’ states of mind or personal journeys and conflicts – don’t feel like clumsy storytelling, at least to me. It works, because it’s how he writes. The thing is, it’s not quite how Jordan writes. Jordan does give the reader a fair amount of explanation sometimes, but through slightly different methods – most of which are informative but slightly less direct. So in that context, statements like this, that just hand the situation to you, feel…clunky. Like they were pulled unaltered from an outline, or else like Sanderson felt clarification was needed, but relied – understandably – on his own methods to do so.

But this is also one of the things I actually expected of the authorial transition, just from having read Sanderson’s books. It’s one of the ways in which he and Jordan are very different as writers, and it’s definitely something that was on my mind as I started reading TGS. Which means there could absolutely be an element of confirmation bias at play here, but it also means I’m not overly surprised and therefore not all that disappointed by it at the end of the day.

“But I need to know this place, Hopper. I need to learn how to use it, control it.”

Men, Hopper thought, Sending the smells of dismissiveness and anger. Control. Always control.

Hopper definitely has a point there. I suppose it makes sense, given that each of us is the only constant in our own lives, and even that is up for debate, as I’m not sure anyone is truly immutable. So from that perspective the need for control makes sense, because especially if everything else is changing, it seems only natural to desire some kind of anchor. Maybe you have to be able either to trust in yourself or trust in your surroundings, and if we can’t have one we seek to impose the other. Maybe I’m just talking out my arse. But hey, that’s the whole point of this, isn’t it?

Perrin does his usual trick of pulling himself here too strongly because Perrin has no chill, Hopper tells him to leave and maybe find some chill, Perrin gets kicked out of dreamschool. Damn it, I was hoping for a little more progress but I suppose the very fact that Perrin’s actively trying to learn is a good start. Still, KIND OF UP AGAINST A DEADLINE HERE.

Oh man can I tell you how glad I am to see Faile out of that fucking Malden storyline?

Though there was that odd edge to his eyes. Not a dangerous edge, just a sorrowful one. He had grown haunted while they were apart. She could understand that. She had a few ghosts of her own. One could not expect everything to remain the same, and she could tell that he still loved her – loved her fiercely. That was enough, and so she didn’t worry on it further.

And Perrin for his part seems able to see that Faile does have some ghosts of her own, and also accepts it. Malden was a shitshow but at least we’re getting some character growth and maturity out of it. Not that you can’t get those through other ways, but look, at this point, I’ll take what I can salvage from that whole…deal.

One of the things I genuinely like about how Perrin and Faile are handling the aftermath is that they both truly seem to understand. They understand that the other has been through some shit, and that they’ve been hurt in ways that may not be immediately obvious, and even that there are some things they don’t understand. But neither blames the other for that. Perrin doesn’t blame Faile for whatever happened in Malden and for whatever she had to do, even though he has no idea what exactly that might be. He may assume the worst – whatever the worst is, in his mind – but he makes it very clear that he isn’t holding that against her. And Faile, for her part, understands that Perrin has also probably dealt with some things that she doesn’t know the details of, but where that once may have incited insecurity or jealousy, now it’s just…part of the way things are, and she loves him and knows he loves her and that’s enough.

“I didn’t sleep with Berelain,” he said, voice gruff. “No matter what the rumours say.”

Dear, sweet, blunt Perrin. “I know you didn’t,” she said consolingly.

Honesty! Communication! Conversations in which characters just get straight to the point and state something clearly! Relationships that include a stronger and stronger element of trust!

You know, maybe it’s not actually all that suprising that, given this is the Wheel of Time (and Absolutely No Communication), it took a two-month slavery interlude, four books, and a battle to achieve something like that.

Snark aside, it is genuinely nice to see.

“Perrin, haven’t I explained this? A husband needs to know his wife is jealous, otherwise he won’t realise how much she cares for him. you guard that which you find the most precious. Honestly, if you keep making me spell things out like this, then I won’t have any secrets left!”

That makes absolutely no sense whatsoever to me and I’m not sure how much sense it makes to Perrin, but the important thing here is that she’s explaining her thought process and behaviour rather than assuming he will know what she’s doing and why. They both seem to have come a long way in that regard – mostly, I think, by realising that the other person just doesn’t know. They’re more aware of the fact that they’re coming from two very different places and sets of expectations and cultural norms and perceptive filters, and where that was once a source of tension and unintentional hurt on both sides, they’re now making an effort to be more honest and open and understanding, and to trust that, at the end of the day, they love each other.

It was as if she hadn’t quite understood what it was to be a lady until Malden. Oh, she’d had her share of victories. Cha Faile, the people of the Two Rivers, Alliandre and Perrin’s camp members. She’d put her training to use, helping Perrin learn to be a leader. All of this had been important, had required her to use what her mother and father had trained her to be.

But Malden had opened her eyes. […] She had been humiliated, beaten, and nearly killed. And that had given her a true understanding of what it was to be a liege lady.

I have two problems with this. The first, and lesser, is that it feels like Sanderson again explaining a little bit too much – telling rather than showing. A little annoying, but I can deal with it; I think what irks me about it is more that it’s trying to paint Faile’s section of the Malden storyline as necessary and All About Her Character Development rather than…Damsel in Distress who is blocked at every turn from doing anything at all to rescue herself, is forced to rely on a man who may or may not ask a price for that safety, and in the end is rescued by the man who is placed at the centre of this storyline because we all know that the best way to hurt a male character is to kidnap, rape, or kill his female love interest. It’s not about her; it’s about him. At least have the decency to own up to it.

(The fact that Perrin as a character chooses to reject this notion, and acknowledges that Faile suffered and her pain is her own and he has no right to usurp it or hold her responsible for his own suffering by extension is a huge credit to him and to the way he’s written, and I appreciate it to almost an absurd extent, but it doesn’t solve the rest of the problem).

This brings me to the second thing about this that bothers me: She had been humiliated, beaten, and nearly killed. And that had given her a true understanding if what it was to be a liege lady.

Discovering strength in times of adversity is a trope for a reason, and that’s not what I have a problem with, because I think there’s a great deal of truth to it, and it can make for some excellent stories. No, my issue lies more in the specific kinds of adversity typically given to female characters, as well as the fact that this once again feels almost like retconning Faile’s storyline for the past few books to make it seem more palatable and more necessary and less All About Perrin.

Why is it that female characters must so often discover their strength only when they are humiliated and degraded, while male characters get to at least bear their pain with dignity as their arcs unfold?

I should clarify that this is an issue I see more in the genre as a whole than in Wheel of Time specifically. This series is definitely better than some at providing equal-opportunities Pain And Suffering For Everyone. The (male) protagonist is locked in a box and beaten (though even then, the humiliation aspect is far more subdued; the focus is agony), one of the (male) secondary protagonists is raped and humiliated for an extended period of time, and a (female) major character faces daily beatings with her head held high and is forging a remade Tower around her in the process.

But.

There’s still an imbalance there, if you stack it all on the scales. And without the rest of the genre exacerbating the issue, this might not be as much of a problem. Unfortunately, though, it’s one of those things that has become frustrating for all the times it’s occurred elsewhere, so now every time it shows up it’s just nails on the damn chalkboard.

Perrin learns leadership by having it thrust upon him in times of emergency. Lives are lost and he holds himself to blame, but he isn’t torn down before he’s allowed to grow. Faile, meanwhile, apparently doesn’t truly learn leadership until she’s enslaved.

Rand is captured and beaten. Egwene is captured and spanked. There’s a difference, much as I still love Egwene’s current storyline.

And then you get the genre as a whole, where the easiest way to generate a tragic backstory for a female character is to rape her. The easiest way to generate a tragic backstory for a male character? Hurt his wife and children. Hang on a second. (Oh, and then there’s the part where said male character is justified in having a vengeance-driven plotline, while the female character who is herself violated is usually punished in some way by the narrative for wanting that, and instead has to learn to love, or to forgive and move on).

Plus there’s the fact that male characters tend to have a much more diverse range of tragic backstories –and sometimes they don’t have a tragic backstory at all. They’ll face challenges and difficulties, but a male hero can make it through a story without degradation, without being actually knocked down himself. Whereas if a female character is written that way, the most common criticisms are that she’s ‘unrealistic’ or ‘too powerful’ or ‘hasn’t earned her ending’. Check out what people have to say about Rey, who is probably the best recent example I can think of of a heroine who gets to just be a hero.

Where are the female heroes who dedicate their lives to vengeance and justice for the ones who murdered their husbands? Where are the female heroes who are unjustly exiled and become noble stoic wandering badasses? Where are the female chosen ones for whom the weight of prophecy and saving the world is pain enough? Where are the female Aragorns, the female Jon Snows, the female Asriels, the female Han Solos? There are entire archetypes that are virtually nonexistent for female characters.

It gets tiring to only see certain roles ever given to male characters (and derided when someone tries to give them to a woman), and it gets tiring to see female characters robbed of agency and dignity in order to progress, while male characters get to hold on to a great deal more of these attributes. Wheel of Time is a lot better than some – in large part due simply to the fact that there are so many women – but it’s not exempt.

All of which is to say, the notion that Faile only discovered what it truly means to be a liege lady while she is enslaved and humiliated and slapped by the narrative every time she tries to reclaim some semblance of agency is…irritating.

Being a noblewoman meant going first. It meant being beaten so others were not. It meant sacrificing, risking death, to protect those who depended upon you.

Okay…and what part of that requires slavery and constant threat of sexual assault and routine humiliation and dependence on a man to rescue and protect you?

Remind me why she can’t learn these same things by braving Trollocs and Whitecloaks to go recruit an army that she leads back to the Two Rivers? Or by co-leading her and Perrin’s people as they take on the twin threats of Masema and the Shaido? Or maybe by being the one to secure that tenuous alliance with the Seanchan, at great risk? Or any number of other options that don’t involve being tied up naked on a table. For instance.

“I don’t care what happened to you,” he said.

She sighed. No, not asleep. “What happened to me?” she asked with confusion.

He opened his eyes, staring up at the tent. “The Shaido, the man who was with you when I saved you. Whatever he did…whatever you did to survive. It’s all right.”

This is the part I like. This absolute understanding that whatever happened and whatever she did, it’s not for him to judge or claim or even ask her about. And he goes out of his way to make that point – not because he wants an explanation or because some part of him is holding it against her, but because he wants to make it clear to her that his silence isn’t in any way a condemnation. It’s okay; it’s not about him; he understands. I am absurdly grateful that this is included – multiple times – in this aftermath, especially because so much else about the whole thing frustrates me.

When the gai’shain women had started to be in danger, the Brotherless had chosen and protected those they could.

Those they wanted to have sex with, you mean.

They hadn’t asked anything for their efforts.

Bullshit.

Well…that wasn’t true. They had asked for much, but had demanded nothing.

If only it were that simple.

It bothers me, this massive oversimplification that’s apparently supposed to make us think it’s all okay. He didn’t outright demand anything, so it’s all fine.

But coercion’s a lot more complicated than that, and this explanation entirely fails to recognise the huge power differential in the situation. Did Rolan force her? No. Did he allow her to believe – without saying or doing anything to reassure her to the contrary – that her continued protection could well depend on his continued interest in her? Absolutely. Faile thinks at various points of how to balance maintaining his interest, of what she might have to do, of what it might come to.

And that is fucked up. “Hey, I can keep you from being raped by these other guys, but only while I think I have a chance of sleeping with you myself.” And even if he would have continued to protect her anyway, he doesn’t tell her that. So while the constant threat of rape may have decreased for her, there’s absolutely still an implicit threat hanging over her head that he does ABSOLUTELY FUCK-ALL TO MITIGATE.

He didn’t demand anything, so it’s fine. He just kept her in a situation where at any moment he could have demanded whatever he wanted and she’d have been hard-pressed to say no, because that might mean foregoing his protection. He let her live with that hanging over her head, this sense that at any moment it could escalate beyond her control and there would be nothing she could do about it. Accede to him or take her luck with the rest. At that point, it may be a ‘yes’ but it sure as hell isn’t freely given consent.

If you feel like your safety depends on someone’s sexual interest in you, it doesn’t really matter whether they’ve made demands or requests. And I hate, hate, the way this reduces it to a simplistic black-and-white ‘he didn’t rape her so everything is fine’.

I may have mentioned I’m not a fan of Rolan.

She had never so much as kissed Rolan, but she had used his desire for her as an advantage. And she suspected that he’d known what she was doing.

Wait, really? We’re really doing this? She was a slave and reliant on his protection, and he continued to pursue her despite her refusing him, but we’re going the temptress/seductress route here? Because it wasn’t his fault,it was really her, she was using her wily feminine wiles and he couldn’t possibly be held responsible for his actions in the face of wily feminine wiles and so really she was the one taking advantage of him, the poor guy. Power imbalance? Slavery? Coercion and a sense of entirely conditional safety? Nah, she led him on and used him and he was powerless to resist her. Of course. So really he’s the victim here.

Fuck that whole narrative and the horse it rode in on with an unlubricated chainsaw.

Of course he knew what she was doing, because he created the entire damn situation in which she felt as if she needed to do it, and still did absolutely nothing to give her any indication to the contrary.

[Perrin] had changed during these two months, perhaps as much as she had. That was good. In the Borderlands, her people had a saying: “Only the Dark One stays the same.” Men grew and progressed; the Shadow just remained as it was.

This, I like. The Wheel of Time turns…and ending that, ending change, is just another kind of annihilation that masquerades as eternity.

Also, character development! Self awareness!

“Has anyone discovered what happened to Masema?”

‘I don’t know; has anyone discovered what happened to that knife I…misplaced? Seen it anywhere? Shame, I liked that knife.’

“Blasted colours…I don’t want to watch you sleeping, Rand.”

I don’t know, I’d be grateful Rand is getting any sleep at all, really. Also, just talk to Mat. You could be getting a much more awkward display. Take what you can get.

“What happened to your hand? Light-blinded fool, take better care of yourself…You’re all we have…”

Ah, this is…there’s something almost achingly soft and gentle about this, about the unfiltered moment here where Perrin’s barely even aware of what he’s saying but this is what he says. Where you see Rand’s pain not even through another’s eyes, but a step removed from that, and it serves as a lovely sad reminder of how very human Rand is.

And it’s striking, because when you actually see Rand in the story, either through his own eyes or someone else’s, that’s…not really how he comes across at this point. Especially to other characters, but even to the reader his pain has become something of a constant, a part of the status quo. And his humanity is slipping. He can’t let himself feel any of this, and those immediately around him can’t see it, and so you just…don’t. It takes a moment like this to evoke the memory of the Rand from the beginning, of the boy who was Perrin’s friend, of the fact that all their hopes rest on this young man who has been pushed far too far, beyond all reasonable endurance, who is coming apart and yet can’t let go. He’s all they have, but there’s a fondness that comes through here, a gentleness, that says not ‘saviour’ but ‘friend’.

Faile’s off on some midnight errand; what else is new.

Chiad smiled back. “He did not expect that one of the men he killed would turn out to be the one to whom Bain was gai’shain. I do not think Gaul is happy to have both of us serving him.”

I do not think I’m happy to have both of them serving Gaul. How come he gets to carry his spear to the Last Battle but they don’t? Why do we have to resolve this love triangle by making both fighting women put aside their spears to serve the man? I mean, this is not the hill I’m going to die on, but…sigh.

Faile unwrapped the bundle. The contents weren’t anything extraordinary. A small handkerchief of yellow silk. A belt of worked leather which had a pattern of bird feathers pressed into its sides. A black veil. And a thin leather band with a stone tied at the centre.

Ah. That’s what Faile’s midnight errand is. They’re holding a funeral.

“Four people are dead,” Faile said, mouth suddenly dry. She spoke formally, for that was the best way to keep the emotion from her voice. “They protected us, even cared for us. Though they were the enemy, we mourn them. Remember, though, that they were Aiel. For an Aiel, there are far worse ends than death in combat.”

I…this is lovely and on one hand I absolutely understand why it’s here, but on the other hand I’m really, really not here for the redemption of Rolan. Or rather, for the narrative insistence that there was nothing that needed redeeming. I do not come to mourn Rolan, I come to bury him.

Faile had distracted Rolan at just the right moment, making him hesitate. He’d done so out of concern for her, but that pause had allowed Perrin to kill him.

Had Faile done so intentionally? She still didn’t know. So much had been going through her mind, so many emotions at seeing Perrin. She’d cried out, and…she could not decide if she’d been trying to distract Rolan to let him die by Perrin’s hand.

This part works for me, far better than much of the rest of the scene so far. Faile replaying the scene over and over in her head, still not sure of her own motives in that single instant where there was no time to think, only to react. Knowing that this resulted in Rolan’s death, and just trying to work through it. It’s not even a mourning so much as a processing, and it feels raw and honest and it’s one of those questions she’ll probably never have an answer to.

And here, I find that it doesn’t matter so much that I personally cheered when Rolan was killed, because this is entirely about Faile. It’s not about who exactly Rolan was, or whether he’s someone we should like or feel sorry for; it’s just about…those split-seconds in which everything changes and someone is dead and there’s blood on her hands, and friend or enemy he was known to her, and she’s human. There was nothing else that could have been done […] But that made it more tragic. Faile steeled herself to keep her eyes from tearing up like Lacile’s. She hadn’t loved Rolan, and she was glad that Perrin was the one who had survived the conflict. But Rolan had been an honourable man, and she felt…dirtied, somehow, that his death had been her fault.

…No. Sorry, this is where the scene has lost me again. Rolan is not what I would call an honourable man, for all the reasons I’ve gone into at length above. And this notion that Faile feels dirty, feels like she is at fault…it makes me sad, actually. Because we see her feeling shame or guilt, and we see this polished version of him in retrospect that paints him as honourable and his death as a tragedy, and so once again it’s as if the whole thing has been flipped on its head to make him the victim. When there’s never really an honest examination of what he did. I’m not trying to say he deserved to die for it, necessarily, but the lens through which this whole thing has been shown treats him as virtually blameless, and leaves Faile with this feeling of guilt and shame and sorrow. We don’t need more of that. We’re already far too proficient at seeing the Rolans of the world as paragons of honour and pitying them their suffering at the hands of women they’ve wronged.

This shouldn’t have had to be. But it was. Her father had often spoken of situations like this, when you had to kill people you liked just because you met them on the wrong side of the battlefield.

I may have mentioned this one or two hundred times, but I will eat this particular trope up with a spoon. Enemies-by-circumstance, betrayal-by-necessity, enemies-to-friends, friends-to-enemies, the whole notion of ‘the wrong side of the battlefield’. Love it.

But that’s not what this feels like to me. I can’t see Rolan in that light; I don’t see him as one who was a friend, but as one who was simply a different kind of threat. I can’t put him in that tragic role because I hate him for the choices he made and the things he did to Faile, for the position he put her in.

And this whole concept – when you had to kill people you liked just because you met them on the wrong side of the battlefield – could be show so much more powerfully through so many other characters. You have Tylee and Perrin, who have already laid the foundations for this, if one were so inclined. You have Mat and Tuon and “You are not my enemy, but your Empire is.” You have Gawyn, who has fought and killed men he liked and respected, and whose choices have torn him apart. Hell, you have that lovely scene with Ituralde and General Turan. The Seanchan as a whole are a ready-made device to set up all kinds of these small tragedies, if you want to use them. You have a Black Tower of divided loyalties, and no doubt plenty of Soldiers and Dedicated whose chosen ‘side’ is little more than an accident of circumstance. There’s not exactly a shortage of options here, and the fact that this is the one highlighted is…odd to me, and weirdly disappointing.

If she had to go back and do it again, she would take the very same actions. She wouldn’t be able to risk Perrin. Rolan had to die.

But the world seemed a sadder place to her for the necessity of it.

Once again, I am wholeheartedly on board with the overall sentiment being conveyed here, in the abstract, but I so strongly disagree with the way it’s applied in the specific.

Maeric’s death felt like a tragedy. Singing, the Moshaine Shaido ran to dance their deaths felt like a tragedy. The existence of the Brotherless feels like a tragedy. Even the deterioration of the Shaido, and the loss of their identity as Aiel, and the way it has slowly destroyed them from the inside, feels like a tragedy.

If you want to play with the tragedy of circumstance and inevitability and situations in which there are no good choices, in the context of the Aiel, you already have the Rhuidean sequence and everything that follows on from it. You have the Shaido as the continuation – yet another change, from what they once were to something unrecognisable, while all the while fighting to hold to that core of I am Aiel! You have the Aiel leaving the Three-Fold Land and not knowing if they will return; you have their questions of identity and what comes next; you have those who cannot accept the knowledge of who they were and so instead must betray who they are, by breaking bonds of clan or society. You have the deaths of so many Shaido at Dumai’s Wells, in a battle that definitely makes the world seem a sadder place for the necessity of it. You have all of this; you don’t need to glorify a sexual predator.

“Dead by our hand,” Faile said, “or simply dead from battle, these four showed us honour. As the Aiel would say, we have great toh to them. I don’t’ think it can be repaid.”

You. Owe. Them. Nothing.

That’s the whole damn point. That’s where the whole coercion aspect comes in; in creating a sense of guilt for not repaying, in creating a feeling of obligation or necessity or debt, the coin of which is made very clear even if it is not demanded.

“But we can remember them. The Brotherless and one Maiden showed us kindness when they didn’t need to. They kept their honour when others had abandoned it. If there is a redemption to be found for them, and for us, this will be it.”

This whole scene, just taken as itself and without everything that’s attached to it, is beautifully done, and strikes such a lovely tone.

I just can’t appreciate it because I so fundamentally hate so much of the message it buys into and conveys, and it frustrates me that there’s absolutely no acknowledgement of that.

“Kinhuin had only just started looking out for me,” Alliandre said. “I know what he wished for, but he never demanded it. […] Even if I turned him down, he would have helped us.”

That last bit would go some way towards making this a little bit better if I had any faith at all that it was true. And we didn’t see much of Kinhuin, so maybe he really was a decent guy. But what we did see, of Rolan, did not…really match that. He didn’t say he wouldn’t help Faile if she turned him down, but he sure as hell did not say he would, and he made his interest in her and his…courting…of her so much a part and parcel of his protection of her that it would absolutely have been a risk to trust that he’d continue to protect her anyway.

Also there’s the fact that he didn’t stop asking her and pressuring her even when she did say no, which is bad enough when there isn’t the whole slavery issue thrown into the mix, but as it was she had no way to get away from him and he showed that ‘no’ didn’t mean a whole lot to him.

So in conclusion, nice try but I’m not really buying it. At least, not as a blanket statement for all of them.

“Maretha hated what the other Shaido did,” Arrela said. “But she stayed with them for her clan. She died for that loyalty. There are worse things to die for.”

That, there, is much closer to what I do actually find sad about the Shaido and the whole situation of those caught up in this. That’s the tragedy. Just…remove the part where Rolan and the others kept asking for sex and this whole thing would be SO MUCH BETTER. Agh.

The past was a field of embers and ash, an old Saldaean proverb said, the remnants of the fire that was the present.

That is beautiful.

And maybe it’s only a Saldaean proverb, rather than a Borderland one, but it reminds me so strongly of:

“Burning your future? It will sorrow a great many, I think, when you die in the Blight.”

“Burning my past,” [Lan] said, rising. “Burning memories. A nation. The Golden Crane will fly no more.”

[…]

“You said you burned your past. Let the past have its ashes.”

So…there’s that. I’m not sure I even have a point to make here except that this scene in New Spring destroyed me and that thought from Faile brought it immediately to mind and I’m fine, everything’s fine, this is completely 100% okay, I have no problems at all being reminded of Lan burning his past and not believing he has any right to a future because his life is tied to that fire.

(The past is a field of embers and ash, but the Golden Crane flies for Tarmon Gai’don).

Anyway. Back to Perrin.

He stared up in the darkness, trying to make sense of Hopper and the wolf dream. The more he thought about it, the more determined he grew.He would march to the Last Battle – and when he did, he wanted to be able to control the wolf inside of him. […] He had some decisions to make. They wouldn’t be easy, but he’d make them.

And so Perrin at last is taking his final steps on the road that will lead him to the finale. He isn’t lost anymore; he still has decisions to make and things to learn, but he knows now what those are. He knows what he needs to do and he’s not running from it anymore, or pushing it away. He’ll face what comes and he’ll face it on his feet.

He was going to have to let Faile ride into danger, perhaps risk her again.

Yes. And given the storyline of the past few books, that’s…an impressive realisation for him to come to. Not an easy one for him to accept, but once again, at least he knows it now. Besides, those are her choices to make.

The decision to face his problems brought him a measure of peace

Yes. That’s the real closure of this previous arc, here. The decision to finally face, head-on, what comes next. To acknowledge what that will require from him. Now he can move forward.

Next (TGS ch 22) Previous (TGS ch 20)

#this was actually a lovely chapter #despite my issues with some of it #Wheel of Time #neuxue liveblogs WoT #The Gathering Storm

38 notes · View notes

rebrobindoesmath · 8 years ago

Text

How I Attempted To Mathematically Model the Spread of Memes on the Internet, pt 1.

This is my first ever /actual/ Tumblr post, so first of all, let’s hope I’m doing this right.

I’ll make my introduction fairly brief as to get to the mathematics ASAP. This was part of my senior project for my mathematics B.S. (which I am very close to completing!). I presented parts of this research at the Michigan MAA Section Meeting in April of 2017. And I am really excited to share what I found in a more casual setting (rather than in a formal paper for my class or a conference presentation).

So let’s get to it, eh?

For the first installment of this series, I want to touch on two main things:

Why Did I Decide To Do This?

Things You Need To Know Before We Can Get To The Cool Stuff (I Know, I Know, But You Need To Know These Things)

Why Did I Decide To Do This?

My senior mathematics capstone course was on the topic of Markov chains. The main purpose of this class was for each student to complete an individual research project. I struggled for quite some time to determine what I wanted to do my project on. I eventually settled on disease modeling, but found myself disinterested with the material. I credit one visit to my advisor’s office for what sparked in me the most academic drive and passion for a project I’ve ever had.

I walked in, planning on just talking about my ideas for my disease modeling project. My advisor suggested that I could use this sort of model to work with other things, and me, being the Internet-addicted smart ass that I am, asked, “Like memes?”

So here we are.

Things You Need To Know Before We Can Get To The Cool Stuff

First, I’m assuming that you are familiar with the following concepts from linear algebra:

Matrix algebra

Eigenvalues and eigenvectors

Diagonalizing matrices

For the sake of time and length, I leave reviewing those as an exercise to the reader. Ha, I’ve always wanted to say that.

So I’ll begin with Markov chains.

A Markov chain is a stochastic process where the probability of being in the current state is dependent solely on the previous state you were in.

What’s an example of this?

Suppose you are playing a game on a rectangular board of 7 squares. Your piece starts on the center square. For each move, you have a probability of 1/3 of moving to the left (which I'll denote L) and a probability of 2/3 of moving to the right (which I'll denote R). If you get all the way to the right, you win! However, if you get all the way to the left, you lose (*sadface*). Once you reach either the leftmost square or the rightmost square, you can’t move out of them. We’ll talk about this in more detail later, but these are what we call absorbing states.

See below for the starting position.

Say your first four moves are R, L, R, R.

Your probability of moving to the right is still 2/3 and your probability of moving to the left is still 1/3. Much like the honey badger, the probabilities don’t care that you moved R, L, R, R already; they are still the same as before. Examining this as a Markov chain is nice because it allows us to answer two important and interesting questions:

What is the probability of winning after a certain number of moves?

What is the average number of moves it takes until I win?

I’ll attempt to answer question 1, and I’ll leave question 2 as an exercise.

In order to find the probability, we must first create a transition matrix. The transition matrix, $T$, is a matrix where $T_{i,j}$ is the probability of getting to the $i^{th}$ state from the $j^{th}$ state. In this example, each state is a square on our board. Our transition matrix looks something like this:

Let’s discuss!

We note that every column sums to 1. This makes sense! We have to move every turn, so the sum of the different probabilities of leaving each state should equate to exactly 1. We also note that $T_{1,1}$ and $T_{7,7}$ are both equal to 1. These are our absorbing states! Absorbing states are those states where the probability of returning to itself is exactly 1. So, you’re essentially trapped (mwa-ha-ha) in these absorbing states.

How does this help us find the probability of winning?

Excellent question! If we want to find the probability of being in the $i^{th}$ state after starting in the $j^{th}$ state after n moves, we simply find $T^n_{i,j}$. This can be done using your favorite computing software (I personally opt for SageMath), or if you’re feeling particularly ambitious, you can do it by hand (but I don’t recommend this, for the sake of your health).

So if I want to find the probability of winning the game in at most, say, 10 moves, I would look at $T^{10}_{7,4}$, as this entry shows the probability of ending in the 7th state (win!) from the 4th state. Additionally, I could also find the probability of losing after at most 10 moves by looking at $T^{10}_{1,4}$.

Here’s $T^{10}$ as outputted by SageMath:

Our $T_{7,4}$ entry is $\approx$ 0.7133, giving us a nice 71.33% chance of winning the game in at most 10 moves!

We can continue to raise $T$ to higher and higher powers and see if we can find the values that the probabilities approach, but there’s an easier way! We can find the steady state distribution of our transition matrix.

The steady state distribution is the vector that when we multiply $T$ by this vector, we just obtain the same vector. In other words, it’s a vector $v$ of probabilities such that $vT = v$. Also, this vector $v$ is actually the eigenvector associated with the eigenvalue of 1!

For the sake of time, and since I’m assuming you’re comfortable with matrix algebra, I’ll leave the solution to you.

After finding the steady state distribution, we can determine that the overall probability of winning is 8/9 and the overall probability of losing is 1/9. Good odds!

How does this fit into my research? / Preview for the next post!

I’ll talk more in the next post about how I viewed the spread of memes as a Markov chain, but in general, I worked sort of backwards from how I solved this example. In my research, I don’t know my probabilities, and my goal is to try to find them! So I use these ideas to create some ~pretty dope~ equations involving these unknown probabilities and try to match these equations to data sets I obtain from Google Trends. Of course, this will make more sense with my future posts!

Hope you enjoyed! Any questions/comments/concerns, feel free to send me an ask.

Best wishes and stay positive!

(I promise that wasn’t a math pun)

(Okay, maybe it was)

Update: Here’s Part 2 of this series.

#mathblr #memes #studyblr #math #mathematics #stochastic process #researchblr #markov chain #i had a picture of dat boi in my conference presentation and i'm not even ashamed

242 notes · View notes

geekade · 8 years ago

Text

Some Thoughts About Suicide Squad

Hi Geekade readers! I’m not taking to coding as quickly as I’d hoped, and find myself making the hard decision between using my Pi to learn and code or to install Retropie and play games, so I thought I’d take a brief departure from my normal tech talk to discuss another passion of mine: Harley Quinn.

She’s possibly one of the best, most tragic female characters in literature. There’s no one on earth in a better position to be fully lucid while they go insane than she is, nobody who consistently and knowingly chooses her own imprisonment and torture more frequently. It’s like if Jack Sparrow had a law enforcement degree and still made all the same decisions while pirate hunters repeatedly and desperately offered him help and companionship. I could go on, but I have an actual point, so I’ll spare you. As you can imagine, I was both fearful and thrilled as I awaited the Suicide Squad release, rightly imagining Margot Robbie to be absolutely perfect for the part, and wholly unconcerned with the building, meme-fied humiliation of Jared Leto’s Joker. (The Joker, arguably, is inessential to Harley’s transformation‑PLEASE ask me about this, I’d love to tell you.)

Suicide Squad was fine. It was nowhere near the let-down of Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland (which I’d awaited for 4 years by the time it was regrettably released in theaters instead of burned in the dead of night in ditches somewhere), but nowhere close to as satisfying and funny-while-successfully-introducing-otherwise-unknown-characters-to-mainstream-audiences as Guardians of the Galaxy had been. However, if you’d like to watch Suicide Squad, but also would kind of like to watch a good movie, I’ve got news for you.

Suicide Squad is essentially a DCCU remake of the DCU movie Assault on Arkham, which was released a few years beforehand. It’s, honest to goodness, basically the same movie but instead of being potentially a waste of $9-14 dollars, it’s GREAT and a totally appropriate use of maybe $4 to rent on Amazon Prime. (I know, no smarthome stuff and I still manage to be a shill for Amazon. They’re not even paying me.)

Assault on Arkham is a part of a set of movies and shows that I don’t feel could possibly get enough attention - the Batman Animated Universe, encompassing everything from Batman: The Animated Series (arguably the definitive Batman) to the more recent The Killing Joke, and the upcoming Batman and Harley Quinn (which, AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH). In Assault on Arkham, Mark Hamill returns as the voice of the Joker facing Kevin Conroy as Batman, and Hynden Walch as Harley (Princess Bubblegum/Starfire/Penny from Chalkzone.)

I highly suggest that you go watch Assault on Arkham, but just a warning, there are spoilers ahead.

Assault on Arkham takes place at a time after the Suicide Squad had already been formed, so it saves us the trouble of a full origin tale, but it also begins with a bit of a changeup in the team - both from the Suicide Squad movie gang, and from the formation of the squad in the animated universe. We’re treated to the more characterized and strangely sympathetic King Shark in place of Killer Croc, who in the Suicide Squad movie is bold and violent, but not much else. We’re also introduced to Killer Frost, who is an icy villainess a-la Livewire from B:TAS. She’s sassy and has what appear to be magical ice powers; like Elsa, but mean. Black Spider, a bloodthirsty, crime-hating vigilante also joins the team, apparently only grudgingly in the company of everyone else. We keep Captain Boomerang, Deadshot, and Harley Quinn herself, but the dynamics of the team are the same. One hulk, one killer-killer, one elemental, one nutty Australian robber, one entrepreneurial dad, and one crazy former therapist.

Oh - and one sacrificial lamb. Both movies kick off with a “proof of concept”‑someone nobody particularly cares about to prove that Waller will actually blow their heads off. In Assault on Arkham, it’s a raging Red bull called “The KGBeast” who nobody would ever mourn, and in Suicide Squad, it’s “Slipknot,” the man who can climb anything. This proves for us how cruel Waller really is‑and in both movies, Waller gets called out as the devil. This is a reference to the comics, as well as simply a fact. Waller is probably actually Satan.

See‑in each movie‑not only is Task Force X Waller’s vanity project (which is entirely unnecessary and completely inhumane, not to mention a complete violation of the constitutional rights of the prisoners involved), but the main conflict faced by our hostage heroes is a mishap of Waller’s own making. In Assault on Arkham, Waller had slipped a Suicide Seed into the Riddler’s neck to test her prototype, and he figured out how to disarm it, so, she created a fistfull more, stuffed them into some other criminals, and sent them to murder the Riddler. And also, the Joker has supposedly hidden a dirty bomb somewhere in Gotham and Batman is tearing the city apart to find it. (SEE DC? You still could have shoehorned Batman into this movie too.)

But all the plot-relevant stuff aside, the meat of Assault on Arkham is Harley and the Joker. They start the movie out broken up, which, if you follow their relationship as obsessively as I do, you’ll know is not actually an uncommon thing for them. Harley and Mister J are currently canonically canned. She’s even been out with Bruce Wayne on a legitimate and mutually enjoyable date. Heck, she only lives about 40 minutes from me, in Coney Island in a shabby apartment with her pets and pals and her primary non-monogamous partner, Pamela Isley (Ivy). But in Assault on Arkham, Ivy is is still incarcerated, and H&J are on the rocks.

It’s heavily implied, in Assault on Arkham, that Joker had thrown Harley out of a moving car and left her for dead, which might sound familiar because it’s almost exactly what they did in Suicide Squad‑but that’s hardly the only thing he’s done to her, and it’s hard to tell if Dr. Quinzel’s rage in the confrontation in Arkham comes from that particular assault or from his complete and utter destruction of her legitimate career, social abilities, criminal record, and sanity. Let’s say both. Harley starts Assault on Arkham out confidently and unconvincingly unattached and reinforces her apparent split by banging Deadshot.

Ok this part, I see why they didn’t snag for Suicide Squad. Will Smith is 48, and Margot Robbie is 26, and while she’s “Daddy’s Little Monster,” I personally don’t want to see her have a fling with someone who was already on Season 3 of Fresh Prince the year she was born. (Yes, Jared Leto is 45 and no, I don’t want to see her with him either.)

When, in Assault on Arkham, Harley (spoiler) breaks into Arkham with Deadshot, she (spoiler) runs into the Joker in his bulletproof cell and (spoiler): it doesn’t go well. He taunts her as only Mark Hamill’s Joker can, in the seductive and deranged varying pitch of a madman, and she is...triggered. (I got puns.)

She manages to keep it together while firing to help Deadshot with the task they’re there for; planting a small hacking device‑Batman-y technology that allows everyone else to sneak in past security, and here is where I pause to rant about Harley Quinn some more.

She knows that his cell is bulletproof and fires at it anyway. This convinces all of the onlooking guards that she’s currently deranged, and convinces Deadshot that she’s (oh, spoiler) not thrilled with the Joker. Her rampage allows Deadshot to complete their first mission, but it also helps the Joker to escape.

It takes Joker what seems like an hour to realize what she’s done for him, what she later confirms she did on purpose for him. This is one of my favorite pieces of evidence that Harley Quinn is the real criminal mastermind behind Joker’s modern accomplishments. For the other, watch “Mad Love,” Season 4 Episode 21 of Batman: The Animated Series, which Suicide Squad also clipped a bit, free on Amazon Prime. Harley has full knowledge of the entire schematics of Arkham Asylum, because, you know, she worked there, and throughout the movie uses passcodes and shortcuts that move the whole team forward, and she chooses to let her puddin loose in the halls, so she can catch up later. Yes, spoiler, she was faking the whole time, and is more than happy to be daddy’s little monster again. She’s even been hiding the dirty bomb.

Ask me what she gets for it.

So, you might at this point be thinking: Gabbie, you’re bizarrely passionate about this clearly unhealthy couple, but also, this movie sounds nothing like Suicide Squad.

Well, you’re wrong. About the second part, at least. Let me take you through it.

Amanda Waller wakes up one morning and decides to randomly create a huge problem‑murdering the Riddler (or releasing the Enchantress, in Suicide Squad). Granted, nerdy Nigma isn’t nearly as frightening as Cara Delevigne slowly building one of the mechanical space worms from Avengers in downtown Chicago, but both are problematic, and both are entirely Waller’s fault.

She pulls together her team of criminals, puts them through a suit-up montage, kills one of them, then drops their helicopter literally out of the sky into a situation that she does not explain to them fully. The Joker and Harley have some sort of private understanding between one another, as could probably have been expected. In both movies, Harley has a camaraderie with Deadshot. Harley also notably does a Matrix” lean in both movies for no discernable reason.

Inevitably, our villain-heroes are actually the patsies. Also inevitably, both the elemental and the tank are killed in explosions of the neck-bomb or fiery variety. And in both movies, the Joker appears to die in a helicopter crash, though in Suicide Squad, we actually get to see the happy couple reunited, whereas in Assault on Arkham, we’re merely told the body wasn’t found, which, for the Joker, is as good as proof that he’s alive.

To be totally honest with you, my main conclusion is that I’d have killed to see Margot Robbie’s Harley Quinn in this Suicide Squad movie instead of the one that we got. She was the one part of Suicide Squad that makes watching it worth it, and while Princess Bubblegum did an amazing job in Assault on Arkham, I’d really like to see a live-action portrayal of Harley having her own hidden agenda, but giving us a full range of emotions and a tiny taste of her‑hate?‑for the Joker.

The Suicide Squad Harleen transformation was painfully unfulfilling, but the canonical story of their mad love is actually very interesting. While Suicide Squad paints Quinn as the Joker’s dupe‑tortured to madness and turned to a crime queen‑the older story is a little more compelling. Over multiple sessions, Harleen realizes that the Joker is able to make her laugh again after years of unwavering, humorless professionalism and ambition. Their sessions become discussions, and she falls in love. This not only makes the Joker seem more dangerous, capable of corrupting a psychiatrist with only his words like a genial, gentlemanly, green-haired Charles Manson, but tells us a lot about the good doctor. And it really makes Harley’s blow-up in Assault on Arkham an incredible moment, especially considering that it’s a dupe. How self-aware is Harley? How actively, and independently, is she choosing the Joker again and again? I for one would have enjoyed seeing that explored in Suicide Squad, just a bit more than I enjoyed the pin-up show we got instead.

I hope I’ve convinced you to check out Assault on Arkham. It’s really an amazing movie. And I hope I get a little bit better at Python, so that next month I can get back to writing about technology instead of rambling justifications of clown-on-criminal romance.

#Movies #Comics #articles

7 notes · View notes

doro7winchester · 8 years ago

Text

Heathers "do it like dean" challenge" #500Doitlikedeanchallenge "FIGHT THE FARIES" @jalove-wecallhimdean there is a tad bit of cussing but other than that yall are good.

Once again you were running late, it felt like that’s all you did lately, was run late. But you had to get to class on time this rime or professor langar was going to lock you out@, and you couldn’t afford to miss this lab. So you were in a full on sprint across the campus and you looked down for like a second and then, *SMACK*, you slammed into someone, and someone hard.

"ah shit I'm sorry, I'm late as fuck I have to be in lab. Or I would have payed more attention." You say rushed, but then you see him.

"Um do you go here?" you ask forgetting about your lab completely.

"No sweet heart, I'm working, but can I walk you to your lab? You know all the robberies on campus, can't be too careful." He said trying to be casual, but he didn’t seem casual on campus at all.

"How do I know you're not the one doing them?" you say in an attempt to flirt, but then you remember your lab, and the fact that you're going to be late. "ah shit walk me or not I have to be in lab in 9 minutes, and I can't be late, so please lets go." You say as you go to run around him, and you realize he's fallowing you.

"Can I come to lab with you?" he asks while you're almost jogging. All you can think is why are you jogging and talking.

"Uhhh if there is space he will let you sit in." you say in between breaths. "But you can't actually do the lab, just watch." You reply very out of breath. "Damn stairs, up we go…what's your name dude?"

"Dean, woah there sweet heart." He says as he catches you from falling right down the stairs.

"Shit, thank you Dean, nice name, I'm Y/N."

You walk into class with Dean on your heels, and take your normal seat, and he just sits there with you.

Your professor walks over and looks at him, "hello, and who are you?"

"Dean, Winchester, just wanted to sit in on the lab, make sure I want to take it next year." He says.

"Ok, were missing quite a few students tonight your welcome to stay, Y/N, make sure he doesn’t break anything." You blush but you're not even quite sure why.

The two of you go through a very simple lab of identifying tissues under a compound microscope, all the while he helps you remember the different categories and sub categories with wonderfully awful puns. Such as cartilage is definable by its matrix because its "cart-al-idge' so it's got to have a something to 'cart' around in.

While his understanding of tissues was a tad silly he was very funny, and oh so hot. So you being the cocky person that you are decide you're going to go for it.

'So Dean, labs all over, you wanna go grab pizza and beer with me? Or do you need to get back to your "case"." You say the last word with air quotes convinced he made that up to talk to you.

"Well sweet heart, my brother is going to be looking for me, especially since I just ignored all of his calls for the last three hours to look at "tissue" through a thingy." He says tissue in air quotes as you had done case because he kept saying that all he could think of when someone said tissue, was the kind you use to blow your nose.

"Your brother?" you say questioningly.

"uh, ya, we work together, we are investigating the women being taken from campus." He says as he shows you and F.B.I. badge you're sure looks funny. "Hu, ok so you weren’t just trying to pick me up, you were actually being nice and walking me to my lab. Why did you stay?" you ask, hoping he doesn’t sense your insecurity.

"That was to pick you up." He says with a wink, "And because you seemed fun, and I was right. No one could have kept me entertained in that class for darn near three hours like you just did." He says as he replies to a text you assume is his brother.

"Hey wait you're not like married are you? Using your brother as a cover?" you question.

"No no, but I am starving, still want pizza and beer?" he asks as he starts to look past you in an odd way.

"Uhh is my hair on fire or something?" you ask sarcastically.

"Um no, but does that light over there seem odd to you? Or am I going crazy?'

You turn around and you see a teal like light emulating from the top of the health sciences building you two were just in. "Yes actually that does seem odd, I don’t know of any chem classes going on right now, and certainly not on the roof like that." You say in astonishment.

"Well sweet heart we may have to settle for a rain check on that pizza." He says as he takes his phone back out.

"Sam, get your but over here I think I found where they were summoned."

He says as he begins to walk towards the building, with you fallowing.

"Hey sweet heart, you should let me and my brother handle this, I wouldn’t want you getting hurt." He says, and you can hear he is being sincere but it triggers a nerve you have from years of being teased by both older and younger brothers, seeing as you were the only girl and smack in the middle of 5 kids.

"Get hurt? What am I some porcelain doll, am I going to just shatter?!" you almost yell at him and you catch yourself.

"I'm coming to help you. I live in that building, and your brother cant teleport so you won't have to be alone, k? And besides if I have to ill run for the hills and find your brother and let him know you didn’t wanna wait for your back up." You say the last part with a wink.

He lets out a heavy sigh as he runs his hand down the back of his neck before he speaks to you, "ok, but here, take this and call Sam if anything happens to me. And you better actually run for the hills if I tell you too ok?" he says with a stern look on his face.

You raise your hand to your eye and say, "cross my heart, or stab my eye." To which he chuckles.

"Don’t think that’s how it goes but ok. Come on." He begins to walk towards the building.

"If we go over here there is an odd stair case I have never gone up, pretty sure it’s the roof access." You say pointing to the left of the direction Dean was walking in. "Y/N, why do you think it's the roof access?"

You knew it was because you were a janitor at the school but admitting that to this man made you feel so small. "Well I actually work here too, not just go here. I um…I clean. You know take out the trash vacuum the floors and what not." You say blushing.

"Well that’s convenient, and working where you go to schools gotta have perks right?" he asks while climbing stairs, with his amazing ass in your face you forget to reply. He looks back at you and catches you staring, so he wiggles his hips making you smile and want to grab it at the same time.

"There, to the left, that’s where most of my studying is done." You say pointing to an odd sitting stoop near a flight of stairs that lead to a door you have never seen open before.

"Hu, odd place to put this." He says as he walks up to it.

His phone goes off in your hands so you show it to him by shaking it at him.

"Answer it and give him directions here, you would be able to do it better than I could."

So you tell the man on the other end how to get to the H.S. building and how to get to the stairs you're on once he's in the building. He thanks you and asks you to try and keep an eye on his brother while he gets to you.

You laugh and tell him that you have no problem keeping an eye on his brother from this angle and he doesn’t reply, probably because he doesn’t understand your reference. Next thing you know Deans got the door open and you yell at him, "Wait your brothers almost here!"

But he's already on his way up the stairs through the door and you don’t know what to do. So you flip his phone. Screen up go with Dean, screen down wait for his brother, and it lands. Screen up, you swallow hard and begin walking. Just as you do you hear a voice, "Dean?? Person who gave me directions?" he says and you laugh realizing you never gave him your name.

"Here!" you yell in his direction as you begin to wave. "I told him to wait for you but he wouldn't, and I was going to go with him but I heard you." You tell him as the two of you hear screaming from Dean.

You both run up the stairs, Sam right under you because of his size, and you wish you had let him lead.

As the two of you reach the roof you can't help but laugh at the site before you, and his brother does as well. You see Dean, the amazingly hot man you had just been with for three hours in a darn dress, not just a dress but a ball gown covered in deep blue sequins, and he's dancing with a see through figure.

"Come on guys! I need your help, I can't fight these fairies by myself, I'm stuck in some kind of farie like dance glue. It dresses you and then this happens." He says as he motions with his head to the dancing he is doing with the see through figure.

"Faries, you're telling me that’s what has done this? That’s what's kidnapping women?" you ask completely ok with this explanation given your religion in some parts worships them.

"Yes, um what's your name?" Sam asks as he look at you in response to your question.

"Y/N, and how exactly do we fight faires, from what I understand there aren’t just fairy fighting weapons lying around in stores."

"Well we are going to start with this." Sam says as he opens the top of a glass container full of what looks like salt. He then dumps the entirety of it at your feet.

Then you see an old women come running over from behind a part of the building, she is yelling at Sam and kneels at your feet.

"Sorry had to make sure it wasn’t you." Sam says as he gently moves you around the pile of salt. You hear her still yelling at Sam about how much was on the floor and how she would be there forever counting all of it.

"Guys! Make this stop please!" Dean yells at the two of you, and Sam goes into action with a book in his hand, and you run over to Dean.

You pull off your protection charm from under your shirt and wrap it around Deans hand, not knowing if your energy is any match for a faire spell, you take Deans hand to channel him as well and begin your meditation. "Chant with me, and do not let go or ill end up dancing too."

He just nods at you and begins the same chant, you are saying, "Our energies combine to break your binds." And before you know it he's free, but still in the dress.

"Really, your mojo couldn’t get rid of the darn dress?"

"Hey I think you look good in it." You say with a wink.

Sam is walking towards you two with a smile in his face.

"Thanks for getting him out of that dance, I wasn’t sure how to do that. And thank you for keeping him in the dress!" Sam says as he bursts out laughing and shaking his head.

"ok ok, enough fun at my expense, can you get me out of this?" he looks at you.

You point at yourself and rely, "No, I'm Wiccan, not some crazy dark witch who can contest with freking fairy magic at full blast. I wasn’t even sure that was going to get you out of the dance, I just was worried it would hurt you if your brother banished it before you were free so I had to try."

"Great so I have to walk all the way to the car in this!" Dean motions to his body.

"No no, here, switch me. The pants won't fit like at all I've got to be 7 inches shorter than you, but high water pants or a dress you can pick." You smile at him, as you walk towards him taking off your clothes.

Both boys gasp, and hard. "What, you two gonna tell me your shy about seeing a girl in her bra and panties?"

As you two swap clothes Sam walks back down the stairs to give the two of you some privacy, which you hadn’t asked for. Seeing Dean in his boxers, and your small t-shirt was almost painful because you wanted to take it right back off of him. And he noticed you staring.

"Like what you see?" he asked looking at you also almost naked.

"Well handsome I don’t know when the last time you looked in a mirror was, but you look like a damn model. And I would have no issue with you letting me take all of your clothes on up here on the roof."

As the words left your mouth your brain registered that you had actually said that out loud, and not in your head. He walked towards you as your brain was freking out waiting for a response, and before you knew it he was kissing you.

You kissed him back, in all truth you had wanted to do this since the first time he made you forget about your lab.

But then Sam cleared his throat and you both looked at him, you blushing and Dean smiling.

"Can we go get pizza and beer now please? I'll even get a separate hotel room for the night, I'm starving."

Neither of you could deny you were hungry and Dean got tense when he mentioned a separate hotel room so to ease his concerns you got up on your tip toes and spoke as close to his ear as you could, "Hey can I make you put my shirt back on later in that room please?"

He replied by pulling you into another kiss, then he spoke in your ear as you had done to him, "as long as I can take that dress off of you, you can make me where whatever you'd like princess." Blushing you just smiled and saw Sam looking like he didn’t know what to do.

"Deal, now let's go eat, you two have a hell of a lot of explaining to do."

tagging some peeps

@jalove-wecallhimdean @deanxfuckingadorablexwinchester @riversong-sam

@lordelrondtheconsultingdetective @impalaimagining @supernaturalmarvelgirl

@wheresthekillswitch @goldenangelbloodcastiel @notnaturalanahi @dreamingintheimpalawithdean @sleepywinchester @just-a-touch-of-sass-and-fandoms @shawn-thegunslinger

#@jalove-wecallhimdean @deanxfuckingxadorablexwinchester

20 notes · View notes

tpaone-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Vector and Raster Images 101

Many clients often come to us for illustrations to meet their technical, marketing, and other various documentation needs. Unless they have an extensive exposure to the graphic and printing industry, many do not understand the difference between vector and raster images, after all that's why they are seeking out the services of a professional graphic designer or illustrator. We’ve decided to write up this brief article to help shed a bit of light on the differences between vector and raster images to better help clients to understand and be able to make more informed decisions for their artwork needs.

Our first task, is to define vector and raster illustrations? The simple answer is a vector illustration is made up interconnected lines and geometric shapes whereas a raster illustration is made from dots or pixels placed in a square grid pattern.

Vector illustrations are created using mathematical formulas and geometric shapes such as polygons, lines, curves, and points. Specialized programs such as Adobe Illustrator or Corel Draw are used to create vector-based illustrations with file formats such as EPS, AI, PDF, and SVG.

If an illustration is not vector-based then it's a raster or bitmap image which uses a dot-matrix structure made from a rectangular grid of pixels or points of color. Raster images are created with programs such as Adobe Photoshop, Corel PaintShop, or Corel Painter with file formats such as TIF, JPG, GIF, and PNG.

In some applications you cannot tell the difference between a vector and a raster image. Take this smiley face for example. The smiley on the left is a vector based illustration, while the smiley on the right is a raster illustration.

From a distance they both look very similar, however, as the images are magnified the raster image begins to appear slightly out of focus and jagged around the edges. Vector images will maintain a very crisp almost Hi-Def appearance no matter how big they are enlarged.

The final use or destination of the artwork is usually what drives the format used in its creation.

Now let's look at this old Chevy truck.

This illustration will dramatically illustrate the difference between vector and raster images. You will clearly see where the rubber meets the road; pun intended. Using a vector format will allow you to size this image on anything from a postage stamp to a billboard and still retain the crisp, clean, Hi-Def appearance.

If we create a raster image to print on a postage stamp and then want to enlarge it you can see how the image gets very grainy, and you actually see its dot-matrix structure.

Whenever you create images that will be used with multiple applications like technical manuals and then also for advertisement purposes it's easy to see that the vector illustration will consistently provide a more professional appearance.

We hope you have found this brief article to be helpful, as time permits, we will post more material to help with a deeper understanding into the world of illustrators and graphic designers.

#vector vs raster #vector #raster

0 notes

charmscale · 6 years ago

Text

Songbird: The Awakening Chapter 4

I stared in shocked horror at where the shadow spirit had been. More that a few people went limp as they chased it in the astral, and I saw Alpha’s eyes glow, which, I remembered, meant she was astrally perceiving. I remembered that I could do the same thing. Blinking, I peered into the astral.

The bar was an emotional maelstrom of shock and panic, with more than a little bit of rage mixed in. Lucky, I remembered, had lost his girlfriend to a shadow spirit. He’d left town on a job and come back to find a skeletal husk, so obsessed with her painting that she’d forgotten to eat and sleep.

She’d died in the hospital a few days later. That had been a muse spirit. There were other types. Nastier ones. As I looked around for the shadow spirit, I wondered what type this one was.

Whatever it was, it was gone now, at least to my eyes. I blinked, and my spirit settled back into my body, allowing me to see the mundane, material world again.

Shakily, I left the stage. Ember took me by the arm and led me back to my seat. The other spirits appeared to have dematerialized, including Paw. I wondered how many were still hanging out in the astral. Probably most of them. The only spirits with a reason to be in this bar were ones bound by the mages currently hanging out here, and bound spirits liked to stay with their summoners.

I looked at Alpha, whose eyes were no longer glowing. “See anything?” I asked.

She shook her head. “It must have left immediately after it dematerialized.” She frowned. “I wonder why it decided to materialize here. Shadow spirits normally go after weak, undefended targets, not bars full of armed runners.”

Ember shifted uncomfortably. “It, umm, may not have had a choice. I know I wasn’t intending to materialize. But so little of the song filters into the astral. I just had to hear better…” He shivered. “So beautiful…”

I looked at the rapt expression on his face and swallowed. “I really didn’t intend…” I trailed off, shrugging helplessly. The way Ember was looking at me gave me an odd sense of power, and I didn’t like it.

As more and more mages returned to their bodies, Alpha stood. “This is not the place to talk about this.” Gesturing for Jazz and Shark to follow, she hustled me out of the room.

Tiger fell in behind her. “Alpha, we need to talk about what just happened.”

Alpha didn’t stop. “This is team business, which means that it is none of yours.”

Tiger darted around to block her. “This doesn’t just involve your team. It’s-”

He froze as Alpha’s combat knife poked him in the gut. Alpha’s voice was low. “Tiger, I like you, I really do. But if you don’t get out of my way, I will gut you like a fish. Scan?”

Swallowing, he nodded, and stepped aside. The four of us, Ember having vanished into the astral, piled into the van. Before I could even buckle my seatbelt, Alpha roared out of the parking lot.

Eyes on the road, she asked me, “Song, did you know you could force spirits to materialize?”

Ember materialized on the floor of the van. “I wouldn’t say force. Coax or seduce, yes. Maybe even compel. But not force.”

Alpha snarled as she wove in and out of traffic. “Whatever you call it, you just caused every spirit in the bar to materialize. Did you know you could do that?”

I shook my head. “No. I had no idea.”

“I did tell you that your singing was magical,” Ember reminded me.

I shrugged helplessly. “I thought you were overreacting!”

Alpha growled. “Song, you should have realized he was serious. Ember, you should have come to me with these suspicions. What happened just now, that drew attention to the entire team, and we can’t afford to draw attention!”

I nodded. “Because of my… Family situation.”

“It’s not just about you!” Jazz snapped. “I’m a technomancer. Because of that, I have a corp bounty on me. A bounty I’m sure a lot of people would love to collect. And then I’d end up in some fragging corp lab, and I really don’t want to go through that again!”

I looked at her, startled. “Again?”

“We all had lives before Handel hired us to guard you,” Alpha snapped. “And some aspects of those lives make attention dangerous.” Stopping at a light, Alpha turned to look at me. “Song, I consider you a part of the team. However, if you routinely put the rest of the team in danger, that could change.”

“Calm down,” Shark rumbled. “Alpha, she’s just a kid.”

“She can’t be a kid,” snapped Alpha. “Not anymore. Shark, you know as well as I do that kid runners die young.”

“This kid runner recently saved all our lives,” rumbled Shark. “Or had you forgotten?”

Alpha visibly calmed. “Right. Of course.” She looked at me. “I’m sorry, Song. I was… startled by what happened in there.” As the light turned green, she sighed. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”

“Yes, you should have!” snapped Jazz. “Another big show like that, and-”

“And we’ll just have to make sure that doesn’t happen,” Alpha cut her off smoothly. “Song, no more singing in public, and if you develop any more weird powers, please let me know.” She sighed. “I suppose I was the one who pushed you up on stage.”

“You were,” Ember agreed, his narrowed gaze fixed on Jazz.

“I’m sorry about that, then,” Alpha sighed. “I suppose that makes this fiasco my fault.”

“You didn’t know,” Shark rumbled. “Not your fault. Not anyone’s, really.”

Jazz snorted. “I still blame-”

Shark cut her off. “Not Song’s fault, either.”

Jazz glared. “I was going to say Ember.”

Alpha sighed. “Of course you were.” The car pulled to a stop in front of a familiar dilapidated apartment complex. “We’re home.”

As we unloaded ourselves from the van, Alpha told us, “Get some sleep. We’re going after those last three hellcows tomorrow.”

It turned out there were only two hellcows. The two that had been hanging out together had, as I predicted, attacked each other. One was dead. The other was seriously injured, and was easily dispatched. The uninjured hellcow wasn’t much more difficult. And there were no more unexpected surprises.

We returned to the apartment, where Alpha reminded us of the three other jobs on our roster. “Ok, we finished the hellcow run. We still have the one that involves exploding a warehouse. We’ll have to hire another runner for that- Unless one of you has demolitions skills I don’t know about?”

Jazz, Shark, and I shook our heads, but Ember said, “I could burn it down.”

Alpha shook her head. “The Mr. Johnson specified an explosion. Says he wants to ‘send a message.’” She shrugged. “The other two shouldn’t require extra help. Remember, there’s the unspecified job from Stan, and one involving the pickpocket.” She looked around. “Jazz, have you done any searches about info on pickpockets?”

Jazz shrugged. “The casefiles for the local Lone Star aren’t connected to the matrix anymore, remember? Direct plug in only. Very retro.”

“Also very secure,” rumbled Shark.

Alpha sighed. “So, to get any info on local pickpocketing, we’ll need to break into a Lone Star station. Fragging great.”

Jazz shrugged. “Without that data, we won’t know where to start.”

“We could try to get the pickpocket to target us,” Shark suggested. “We know roughly were the original theft was.”

“Roughly,” Alpha agreed. “But that plan will go better if we have an idea of where the pickpocket is usually active, so we can go straight through the middle of their territory.” She chewed her lip, thinking. “Song, did you pick up that invisibility spell formulae I suggested? The one that also fools cameras?”

I nodded. “I picked it up, but I haven’t had time to study it yet.” I made a face. “It’ll probably take 4 or 5 days to learn it.”

Alpha nodded. “I have an idea on how to get into the station, but to get the data tap in place, we’ll need someone invisible. Song, you get to work learning the spell. In the meantime, we can do the demolitions run. It’ll take a few days to line up a runner who can do what we need, anyways. I’ll talk to Lucky. If he can’t do it, he’ll be able to find someone who can.”

I blinked. “Lucky does demolitions?” From what I’d seen of him, he was a bit… cavalier to be a successful explosives expert.

Shark sniggered. “Yeah, I know what you mean. He hasn’t blown himself up yet, though.”

Jazz snorted. “He’s gotten lucky. No pun intended.”

Alpha shrugged. “Whether through luck or skill, he’s good at what he does. And that’s what we need.”

Discussion over, I headed to my room to begin studying, with Ember following close behind.

Three days later, I was almost done. If I studied late into the night, I’d be able to finish tomorrow. And then we could get started planning the lone star run. Unfortunately, tonight was the night of the explosives run.

Alpha stood in the doorway of my room. Today she was a short, asian woman with a crew cut. “You need to sit this one out, Song.”

I frowned. “Can’t you delay the run for a few days?”

Alpha shook her head. “No. After this, Lucky isn’t available for another month.” She sighed. “Don’t ask me why. He won’t say.”

“Probably going to be out of town,” rumbled Shark behind her.

Alpha shrugged. “Probably. We’ll be fine, Song. I trust Lucky to have our back. He’s a bit secretive, but he’s solid when it counts.”

I nodded unhappily. “When should I expect you back?”

“We’ll be in before 3 am,” Alpha told me. “Is Ember back yet?”

I shook my head. “Nope.”

Alpha sighed. “I wish he’d told us where he was going. Or when he’d be back. Or, well, anything about this little errand of his.”

I shrugged. “Technically he’s a free spirit. I can’t control him. He just likes me enough to do as I ask him. Sometimes.”

Alpha frowned. “I don’t like leaving you alone like this.”

I shrugged. “I’ve got Paw, and, if I need to, I can summon another spirit.”

Alpha nodded. “Still, stay in the apartment, if at all possible. The security Jazz set up isn’t ideal, but it’s better than nothing.” She turned toward the door. “See you later, Song.”

Shark turned as well, but looked back at me over his shoulder. “Be safe.”

I nodded. “You too, guys. Be safe.”

I turned back to my studies, worry twisting into a knot in my gut.

Four in the morning. The others weren’t back, and I was worried. I paced in my room as Paw watched anxiously from a corner. “Can you sense Ember at all?” I asked Paw.

It shook its head. “No.”

I dialed Alpha on my commlink again. It went straight to voicemail, again. So did Jazz’s and Sharks. I swore. Alpha and Jazz might have turned theirs off so the noise wouldn’t give away their position, but Shark’s commlink was implanted. With no ring or vibration to worry about, he never turned his off. He didn’t always answer, but he never turned it off.

Whatever had happened, it was likely over already. But I still had to know. I turned to Paw. “Find Alpha, Jazz, and Shark. If they need help, help them. Then come back and tell me if they’re ok.”

Paw hesitated. “Do I have to? I don’t want to leave you alone.”

I rolled my eyes. “I’ll be fine. Go.”

As my bound spirit, Paw had no choice but to obey. With one final lingering look at me, it dematerialized.

I sighed, and began to pace again. What if Alpha, Jazz, and Shark were dead? I swiped away a tear, but could do nothing about the pain and terror that spiked through me. It wasn’t just the fear of losing three close friends, though that in itself was bad enough. It was the fear of losing the safety they represented.

No one besides them had a reason to give a drek about my life. That was the chip truth. My mother was dead, likely murdered. Handel was dead as well, definitely murdered. My father had died long ago. No one cared about me, and many had reasons to want me dead.

Unreasoning terror spiked through me. If they were gone, what would I do? Where would I go? What if someone figured out who I really was? What if-?

I broke through the terror. Something was wrong. I’d spiraled into unreasoning fear way, way too quickly for it to be natural. “I know you’re there,” I said, trying to sound confident even though I was still shaking in fear. “You’ve got 5 seconds to scram, and then I summon something powerful and come after you on the astral.”

A shape materialized. A robed figure. The shadow spirit from the bar. I raise my hands, ready to cast a spell. “I said scram!”

The figure laughed. “You don’t scare me, little mage. You are weak, and so very, very alone.”

Fear rose to choke me. I backed towards the door. I couldn’t seem to look away from the spirit, caught, like a deer in headlights, in the gaze of two glowing green eyes. I could feel the spirit pulling at something inside me, drawing energy from the core of my being. I shook. Tears streamed down my cheeks. I had to do something… I had to… I…

My trembling fingers couldn’t seem to work the latch on the door. I couldn’t get it open. I was trapped. Trapped in a room with a nightmare.

The nightmare glided towards me. Closer… Closer… I wailed in terror.

The shadow spirit froze, trembling. The terror that imprisoned me eased. My trembling lessened, and I remembered I was a mage. A mage. I could fight back.

I closed my eyes and opened my mind. I needed a protector. A guardian. A powerful one…

With a hollow boom, my summoned spirit appeared between me and the nightmare. It looked like an enormous suit of medieval armor, so tall it had to crouch slightly to avoid touching the ceiling. Its visor was down. Nothing was visible of whoever, or whatever, wore the armor.

It casually backhanded the shadow spirit, sending it crashing into the wall. Then it turned to me. “What is thy bidding, my lady?” Its voice was deep, and had a slight metallic echo.

I blinked, still dizzy from drain, and wiped my nosebleed with my sleeve. “Ummm…”

“I presume you wish me to deal with this ruffian?” It gestured toward the shadow spirit, which rose, hissing, from the floor.

I just stared, shaking, as the shadow spirit glided towards me once more.

“There is little I can do without your command,” the guardian spirit reminded me. “Do you wish me to deal with the nightmare? A simple yes will suffice.”

I took a deep breath. “Y-yes!”

Without another word the guardian spirit thrust a fist into the shadow spirit’s robed form. It dematerialized. Seconds later, the guardian spirit vanished as well.

I leaned against the doorway, panting and trembling. I knew that, on the astral plane, my summoned spirit fought the nightmare. I tried to plan what I would do if my spirit lost. Should I summon another? If I did, I might end up passing out. That would not be good.

The guardian spirit reappeared. I breathed a sigh of relief. “You won?”

“In a manner of speaking, my lady,” the spirit told me in its deep voice. “The shadow spirit surrendered. She wishes to make recompense.”

I blinked. “Make recompense?”

The shadow spirit rematerialized. I squeaked, and she winced. “I’m sorry. I promise, this time I did not mean to frighten you.”

I blinked. “Ok.”

She looked away. “I… I heard you sing the night I… Well, you remember. I’ve been following you ever since. And tonight you were alone, and already frightened…” She looked down. “I thought you would be delicious.” Then she met my gaze, green eyes bright with malice. “And you were.” She laughed.

The guardian spirit cleared his throat. The shadow spirit looked away again. “I won’t do it again. And not because this hulk beat me. Though he did. When you cried out…” She trembled. “It touched me. Deep inside. Like your singing, except… Except it hurt. I could feel your terror. Your pain.” She shivered. “I want to make it up to you. To help you.” She reached out to me with a skeletal hand.

I drew away, shaking.

The spirit sighed, and dropped her hand. “You’ll drive me away, won’t you. If you can. I’m frightening. I’m dangerous.” She looked at me thoughtfully. “But what if you had a way to control me? Would you drive me away then?”

I swallowed. “What are you talking about? Control you?”

The nightmare met my gaze. “I’m talking about binding.”

I blinked. “Shadow spirits can’t be bound.”

I couldn’t see her smug smile, but I could feel it. “That’s because, if you didn’t summon a spirit, you need its name to bind it. With normal spirits, like this big guy, there are ways to find out. However, a shadow spirit’s name must be freely given.”

“And you’ll give me your name? Just like that?” I asked.

Her green eyes pierced me. “No. Not just like that. You must promise me you will never, ever share my name. With anyone. For any reason. I won’t serve just any meatperson. I’d rather die. But you’re different. I’ll serve you.”

“How sweet,” a voice said from the opposite corner. I whirled. There was Ember. His eyes met mine. They blazed. “Songbird. Where is Paw? Why wasn’t he here to protect you? Or to fetch me?”

I blinked. “The others were late. I sent Paw to find out if they were alright.”

Ember’s voice was cold. “You should have sent him to fetch me first.”

I sighed. “I didn’t want to bother you.”

“And I don’t want you to die!” Ember snapped. “I will admit, this little disaster worked out just fine without me. But what if it hadn’t? You’re vulnerable, Songbird.”

“The fire spirit has a point,” boomed the suit of armor. “You are delicate. You must be protected.”

I glared at them both. “I protected myself just fine for years before I summoned either of you.”

“I’m not sure how,” snapped Ember. “It’s a dangerous world out there, Song, and you don’t seem to realize that.”

“Ummm…” This voice came from the direction of my bed. “It’s kind of crowded in here, so I materialized on the bed. I hope that’s alright.”

That was Paw! I turned to face him. “Are Alpha, Shark, and Jazz ok?”

Paw shook his head. “Not really? They sent me to ask you for more help.”

I turned to the guardian spirit. “Go with Paw. Help Alpha, Shark, and Jazz however you can.” He vanished.

I turned to the shadow spirit. “If you’re so serious about helping me, you should go with them and help.” She dematerialized. A second later, so did Paw.

I turned to Ember. His expression was mullish. “I’m not going anywhere.”

I sighed. “Fine.” A shadow spirit, a guardian spirit, and a beast spirit were probably more than enough anyways. I settled down on my bed to wait.

Ember settled down beside me. “Are you wondering where I was?”

I shook my head. “Not really. That’s your business.”

Ember sighed. “It’s actually kind of your business too, Song.”

I looked at him. “Can we talk about this later? I’m worried.”

Reluctantly, Ember nodded. “Of course.” He paused. “Can you sing to me?”

I nodded. “What should I sing?”

He shrugged. “I don’t care.”

I took a deep breath.

“Shadows and moonlight,

Bargaining with the night.

Sold and bought

Devil’s delight.

“The deal that I made,

On the edge of a blade.

Run and fight

Seduce, persuade.

“The guns and the knives,

Then we run for our lives.

Pray and dream

That hope survives.

“Sold and bought,

Run and fight,

Pray and dream,

This is my life.

As I finished, Ember sighed. “That was beautiful.”

I smiled. “Thank you.” Looking down shyly, I added, “I wrote it myself.”

Ember leaned against my shoulder. “Sing to me more.”

I complied.

0 notes

reviewape-blog · 6 years ago

Text

Revolutionary Breathing Technique Relieves Stress and Helps Relax - The Ocean Breath

https://www.reviewape.com/?p=18176 Revolutionary Breathing Technique Relieves Stress and Helps Relax - The Ocean Breath - Product Name: Revolutionary Breathing Technique Relieves Stress and Helps Relax – The Ocean Breath Click here to get Revolutionary Breathing Technique Relieves Stress and Helps Relax – The Ocean Breath at discounted price while it’s still available… All orders are protected by SSL encryption – the highest industry standard for online security from trusted vendors. Revolutionary Breathing Technique Relieves Stress and Helps Relax – The Ocean Breath is backed with a 60 Day No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee. If within the first 60 days of receipt you are not satisfied with Wake Up Lean™, you can request a refund by sending an email to the address given inside the product and we will immediately refund your entire purchase price, with no questions asked. (function ($) { var $self = $('.adace-loader-5c3661307947d'); var $wrapper = $self.closest('.adace-slot-wrapper'); "use strict"; var adace_load_5c3661307947d = function(){ var viewport = $(window).width(); var tabletStart = 601; var landscapeStart = 801; var tabletEnd = 961; var content = ''; var unpack = true; if(viewport=tabletStart && viewport=landscapeStart && viewport=tabletStart && viewport=tabletEnd){ if ($wrapper.hasClass('.adace-hide-on-desktop')){ $wrapper.remove(); } } if(unpack) { $self.replaceWith(decodeURIComponent(content)); } } if($wrapper.css('visibility') === 'visible' ) { adace_load_5c3661307947d(); } else { //fire when visible. var refreshIntervalId = setInterval(function(){ if($wrapper.css('visibility') === 'visible' ) { adace_load_5c3661307947d(); clearInterval(refreshIntervalId); } }, 999); } })(jQuery); Description: This is a no pun intended breath taking book. Its easy reading, simple, and yet profound. It holds the secret to health, well being and personal transformation. And to think its as easy as breathing in a certain way! Beautiful! Dr. Joe Vitale, author of Zero Limits and star in the movie The Secret www.MrFire.com Air is free. We don’t rent it, pay for it, get it bottled, or even think about it that much. And yet, if we lose the air in our lungs, we die. We can survive without water for up to 4 days. We can survive without food for 3 weeks, but without air, we die within minutes. Would you pay more attention to your breath if you knew it was more important than food? And yet the air is so much more than survival. The Ocean Breath a method I am abut to explain, does so much more. The Seven Benefits of The Ocean Breath: “This inspired book reveals with simple clarity the power of The Ocean Breath both to calm you if you are stressed or anxious and to awaken you to higher levels of consciousness in a matter of a few conscious breaths. It brings you directly to the safety of the moment where your humanness and your divinity merge. Like the ocean itself, it is calming and invigorating depending of what you need.” David Riklan Founder – SelfGrowth.com, the # 1 Self Improvement Website on the Internet The list of benefits goes on… The Ocean Breath expands your ability to open your heart and: My book The Secrets of the Ocean Breath is a result of over 40 years of observation, experimentation, and teaching. The Ocean Breath is the breath Nature intended us to take but by the time weve reached our teens, most of us have completely forgotten it. This is what my client, David, wrote after just 3 sessions: “Thank you, Carla for such a gift! After seeing you my orgasms which were kind of weak and not really satisfying became more powerful. Just before writing you I had an intense orgasm that was mind blowing. I can now relax enough to really feel all the sensations I was missing when I was preoccupied with my performance. My lover is now ecstatic and wants me to teach her the Ocean Breath” – David “I notice that when I breathe with my nose into my upper chest I am thinking instead of feeling. There are times when thinking is essential, but not when I need to check in with myself about what I really want and need. When I make love I’m so glad that I can stay connected with my core and allow myself to surrender to my sensations. I’m now using the Ocean Breath anytime I don’t have to work and my life is much more expanded and fulfilling. Thank you for teaching me this magic Breath.” – Maggie “I have never experienced a vaginal orgasm. I used to force myself into having clitoral orgasms, but they were short and not very fulfilling. After you showed me how to use the Ocean Breath I can have not one but many satisfying vaginal orgasms. I can now fully surrender to the many mind blowing sensations and let the orgasm happen. My husband was getting frustrated with our sex life and now we are both feeling excitement similar to what we had at the beginning of our relationship. Thanks” – Louise I can tell you many stories of how the Ocean Breath enriched the life of people I worked with. Here is another one: “Carla, I’m sure you remember how full of self doubts and guilt I was about my sexuality. Thank you so much for teaching me the Ocean Breath. I’ve been practicing now 20 minutes every day before I go to work and during the day I remember to do some Ocean Breaths whenever I have a chance. It really helps me to decompress from stressful situations both at work and at home.” – Angie “I feel much better about myself. I’ve noticed something very amazing: I regained my ability to be spontaneous. Sometimes I’m stunned of how much I enjoy discovering new things and noticing details I never paid attention to when I was busy judging and criticizing either myself or others for not fitting into the picture of perfection I created. I can now experience and celebrate the sense of discovering. I now feel the enjoyment of my body and have a real connection with my lover. No room for guilt. I also feel healthier and stronger.” – John “I used to believe that life was a struggle. And in fact my life was a struggle after another: my work, my health, my relationship, and even my breathing. It was hard to get enough air in to move as I wanted, and I was feeling old. After about 20 minutes of Ocean Breath with you I was calm enough to see clearly what had happened in my life. I had started this struggle pattern watching my mother representing herself as the greatest victim that ever existed. Well, I would not have believed how fast the Ocean Breath took me to see how that belief I had absorbed from my mother was controlling me. With your encouragement I reclaimed my power to be at cause in my life, not at the effect of it. I recover my own inner power. When I went home I started changing one thing after another. I still practice the breath and after reaching the peaceful place within I always reconfirm my newly gained power. Thank you so much Carla. Many blessings to you for sharing such deep wisdom.” Does it sound too good to be true? How much would you pay for a product that gives you so many advantages and is guaranteed for life? Well, this product is free. It is a gift from God. Companies dont advertise about breath because they dont make any money. They cannot make a profit if you breathe more air. Air is not for sale! Actually doctors would probably have fewer clients if everyone would breathe the deep Ocean Breath. Their patients would recover faster and avoid possible further complications that would create more pain and further expensive. Luckily for us, the most important element in life is still free. The air we breathe. Knowing how important water and food are Im sure you do research on how to get the bet water and the best food for greater health and vitality. In real estate a worth of a house is determined by comparing the value with other similar houses in the same location. We know that we can live 3 weeks without food and only 2 minutes without air, but this does not usually paint the picture of the enormous difference in the value of air. Lets try it with some math: In 3 weeks there are 30,250 minutes. Most people who did not train to breathe slower usually breathe faster than 8 breaths a minute. If they breathed 8 times a minute they would need 242,000 breaths in three weeks. If you eat 3 meals a day in three weeks you would eaten only 63 meals! Smart people who are aware of the importance of their breath want to learn to use it to their maximum advantage. Wouldnt you pay more attention to the breath if you remembered how important it is for your life? Yes, you might say, I dont have to think of breathing. The mechanism of breath works all by itself. Well yes, if you did not have any limitation on your breathing that you might have picked up from your parents growing up. We copy our parents when we are children and you did not have any trauma that changed the way you breathe. Notice how your breath changes when you are tense or when you are afraid. That is a learned reaction that we can unlearn by consciously using Ocean Breath. How much would you pay for the knowledge to get greater quantities of this precious substance? To learn how to use this special gift? You can have all the benefits above and more (the list of benefits continues below) when you have learned to use this totally natural substance well and consistently at least during part of your day. How would your health increase if you were you give yourself the deserved relaxation after work in an atmosphere were love can bloom. This breathing is your connection to your life force, to the matrix of life. In this essential How to Book you will learn how to regain the ability to breathe the way God meant us to breathe when we want to restore the connection with life inside of us and connect with the life in others. You can unlearn bad habits of breathing that keep you filling up mainly the top of the lungs that is the smallest part of the lungs — instead of allowing the natural process that we are born with to invigorate you more fully. We all knew how to use the Ocean Breath when we were babies. Have you ever watched a baby breathe? Did you notice how their bellies move when they breathe? Can you remind yourself of the kind of energy babies have? I remember my kids were still up and running when I was pooped and ready to go to bed. Babies learn so much during those 4 years or so before their breathing mechanism is corrected by grownups and teachers in order to socialize them. They tell them that a deep breath is a breath that they have to pull in to the top of the lungs, not paying any attention to the fact that the lower part of the lungs is the bigger part of the lungs. Babies learn how to speak, how to walk, how to interact with others, how to get what they want, to learn as many languages as grown-ups speak almost effortlessly, and much more. Learning just one from the above list would take us much longer and lots of effort. The high shallow breath which teachers call deep definitely keeps kids more calm in school because they have less energy to run around and are more inclined to listen to the teachers. If they continued to breathe the Ocean Breath, they might become aware of the discomfort their bodies experience sitting for long hours and they would become restless. And, sadly, by school age, some children might have already had some shocking experience that negatively impacted them and compromised their breathing mechanism. Some children come to school with their breathing mechanism almost shut down. Those are usually the very quiet kids. You might have observed that people who witness an accident pull in a fast and high, but shallow breath and literally suspend their breathing – leaving the experience of having witnessed an accident in the body undigested and unfelt. The undigested” shock is stored somewhere in the body. They did not bring full awareness to the shocking event and suspended their breath – probably in order not to feel the emotional impact of the incident. Now this undigested stuff is in their body causing energy blocks. If they breathed deeply, they would feel the full impact of the acciden,t and holding the breath will suppress it so they can get on with their lives. If you dont breathe fully, you dont feel fully. Bringing lots of breath to the place where a shock was stored will help unblock the tight space where the suppression hides. In order to feel anything you need to breathe. The Ocean Breath is the best breath to use to integrate any experience. “It’s hard to believe that just by breathing a simple breath like the Ocean Breath so much can happen. I was following your instructions to get the most relaxed Ocean Breath I could get and I was not thinking on anything else. Suddenly I felt a discomfort in my stomach and I wanted to stop breathing. You said that it was a good thing and it was important to keep breathing. So I continued and shortly after I felt great rage burning me up in my guts. I did not realize how angry I was at my father for telling me I would never amount to anything. I must have been 6 or 7 years old! I felt like pushing him away, like telling him “shut your mouth,” but I was afraid of him and I swallowed his poisonous comment. With your encouragement I could actually feel enough power to stand up to him in my imagination, and I started recovering my personal power. My sexual energy has also increased after our session. Thanks, Chris “ Another way the Ocean Breath can help: “I can’t believe how nervous I was when we started the session. I felt fear locking me up. When you touched my hands I remember your hands felt hot compared to mine. I was afraid that I would just waste more time and money and get nothing. You were very sensitive to my fears and somehow I became more comfortable in my body. With what felt to me infinite patience and kindness you taught me the Ocean Breath. After 1/2 hour I felt the ice in my body starting to melt, and soon after I felt tingling sensations in my face. You told me to look at myself in the mirror. I looked like another person! No, I did not need years of therapy or primal scream: just this gentle breathing. Thank you!” – Elbie I have worked with a few people who had asthma. They kept themselves alive by breathing fast and high breaths. They agreed that is an exhausting way to breathe. I taught them the Ocean Breath. After they understood its importance, they started to approximate it as much as their lungs allowed. Through continuous practice, some already after a month, some after 2 or latest 3 months noticed their asthma had greatly diminished. Some of my clients were feeling so well they asked their doctors if they could go off the medicine they were taking. Of course, I always tell them to continue until the doctor gives them permission to discontinue or cut down on the medicine. Always follow the advice of your doctor or medical practitioner when doing The Ocean Breath or any kind of physical exercise. However, there was a remarkable difference in the ability to breath more deeply between the time they were taking medicine alone and when they were taking the same medicine in conjunction with using the Ocean Breath. I wish doctors would add this technique to the medicine they teach in medical school. “The Ocean Breath program is truly a marvel in what it accomplishes within a relatively short period of time. It has been known to give quick relief from general stress and panic attacks. I strongly recommend it.” Joseph Sugarman, Chairman, Blublocker Corporation Phil Evans – Master in Personal Development and Empowerment told the following story: A few years ago a giant ship engine failed. The ship’s owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure out how to fix the engine. Then they eventually found a very experienced man who had been fixing ships since he was a youngster. He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work. He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom. After looking things over, the man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer. He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life. He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed! “What?!” the owners exclaimed. “He hardly did anything!” So they wrote the man a note saying, “Please send us an itemized bill.” Immediately after ordering, you will be taken directly to our Confirmation Page, where you can download the 50-page ebook PDF, or choose to have us send the ebook directly to your email. © 2012 Carla Tara. | Home | Privacy Policy | Contact Us Click here to get Revolutionary Breathing Technique Relieves Stress and Helps Relax – The Ocean Breath at discounted price while it’s still available… All orders are protected by SSL encryption – the highest industry standard for online security from trusted vendors. Revolutionary Breathing Technique Relieves Stress and Helps Relax – The Ocean Breath is backed with a 60 Day No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee. If within the first 60 days of receipt you are not satisfied with Wake Up Lean™, you can request a refund by sending an email to the address given inside the product and we will immediately refund your entire purchase price, with no questions asked. - ReviewApe - https://www.reviewape.com/?p=18176

0 notes