#learningtolove

[l-archiduchesse]

When journalists ask Harry how is Tom in the privacy of their home, how someone as sweet as him can match with someone as cold and hard as Tom, Harry usually doesn't answer and go on with his life. But the few times he actually answers, he tells them Tom is all soft and lovey and warm. And nobody believe him.

Harry doesn't care if they don't believe him because he knows it's the truth. He has no doubt about it as he sits in the middle of the stairs in their new house. Tom talks about things Harry doesn't care about but he still listens because he loves him, his voice, his passionate tone and his soft smile when he looks at his mate. They just came back from a gala and they have to get ready to go to bed, even if the first sunrays of the day pour down the stairs and warm their shoulders. But Harry is stuck there, listening to Tom and he feels warm and loved. So he stays, even if he is tired.

I really like this drawing, even though there is some problem of proportion, mainly on Tom. I noticed them a bit late so I kind of carried on with it since I was almost finished by the time... I still like a lot the atmosphere, how Tom looks at Harry, how they look cosy and intimate. So I thought to share. Hope you like it !

L'archiduchesse

[belovedantonia]

#learningtolove

Types of relationships that look like love but are not:

Infatuation: This is an intense emotional or sexual attraction to someone that can give the illusion of love. However, infatuation is often based on idealized perceptions rather than a deep emotional connection.

Codependency: Codependent relationships involve one person excessively relying on another for emotional or physical needs. This dependency can mimic love, but it is rooted in the need for validation, control, or a sense of purpose.

Unrequited love: This refers to a situation where one person has romantic feelings for another, but those feelings are not reciprocated. It may involve one-sided affection, longing, or an obsession with someone who does not feel the same way.

Limerence: Limerence is an intense and obsessive form of attraction characterized by intrusive thoughts, longing for reciprocation, and an idealized image of the other person. It can feel like love, but it often lacks a genuine emotional connection.

Conditional love: In relationships based on conditional love, affection and care are only given when certain conditions or expectations are met. This type of relationship lacks unconditional acceptance and can be manipulative or controlling.

Trauma bond: A trauma bond forms when two individuals share intense emotional experiences, often negative or abusive. Despite the harmful dynamics, there may be a strong attachment due to the shared trauma, leading to a mistaken perception of love.

Transactional relationships: These relationships are based on mutual benefit or convenience rather than genuine emotional connection. Partners may stay together for financial security, social status, or other practical reasons, rather than genuine love and affection.

Manipulative relationships: Manipulative relationships involve one person exerting control and power over the other through emotional manipulation, coercion, or gaslighting. The manipulator may feign love and affection to gain control or exploit their partner's vulnerabilities.

Fantasy relationships: In fantasy relationships, one or both partners create an idealized version of the other person, often based on unrealistic expectations or fantasies. The relationship may lack a true emotional connection, as it is based on the person's fantasy rather than the reality of who their partner is.

One-sided relationships: These relationships are characterized by an imbalance of effort, care, or emotional investment. One person may consistently give more while the other takes without reciprocation. It can create an illusion of love, but it lacks equality and mutual respect.

Love addiction: Love addiction refers to a compulsive or obsessive pattern of seeking out relationships and being dependent on the euphoric feeling of being in love. It can lead to a cycle of unhealthy relationships, as the person seeks constant validation and excitement without addressing underlying emotional issues.

[thewayhometosource]

This free course I designed is a starting gateway on how ANYONE WILLING TO TRY the methods given in this course can start healing techniques that are proven to work for any human on Earth. How do I know this? It's because I've been involved in activities like this in my own journey, and love them all. I am a living testament to represent the given modalities in this course that really work, and can help anyone no matter the circumstances or what they have been through. With Love and light! Blessed Be 🪞🔮🕯️🪽🌕

https://coassemble.com/learn/7IM9K11N

#freehealing

#divineconnection

#holistichealth

#holistictherapy

#LearningtoLove

[animeloverskylarmoon]

Byakuya Kuchiki (Bleach) - Extra 2

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!”

Rangiku’s yell startles you.

“Why didn’t you say anything (Y/N)-chan!”

She grabs you and you’re immediately pulled into a hug. Toshiro shows disinterest as he watches you currently getting somewhat suffocated in Rangiku’s unnatural bust.

“Matsumoto, if you don’t release her she may not make it.” She lets go immediately and you back up.

“S-Stop doing that!!"

“Sorry.”

She says with a little laugh.

“What are you even going on about?” You grumble.

She’s wearing a smirk.

“Don’t be so modest, everyone knows that you and Kuchiki-taicho have a little thing going on.”

“W-What!!”

How did they find out?!

“Who told you that?”

“Ichigo did.”

You sweatdrop.

“It’s obvious he’s trying to get revenge.”

The last couple times his encounters with Byakuya haven’t exactly been great.

“What a hassle.” You mutter.

“Your babies will be so cute!!” Your blush darkens, and Toshiro snaps his pen.

“Quit your gossiping and get your paperwork done Matsumoto!!”

~

After Toshiro’s little outburst, you didn’t stick around very long. Walking through the barracks, you feel a bit annoyed. You only pause at the presence you feel.

“Are you going to keep hiding?”

You place your hand on the hilt of the sword, and you turn at the many bodies that appear.

“We’d like you to follow us (Y/N)-san.”

You recognize them immediately. They worked for the Kuchiki clan. The dark suits are a dead give away.

“I have no intention of being brought into idle talk with nobles. I have no business with you.”

Byakuya had warned you about this. Members of the Kuchiki clan didn’t take well to outsiders. Everyone knew of the way they’d shun his late wife Hisana.

“You seem to think it’s a request, quite bold of you.” Someone else steps out. The robes, dark hair and those eyes. They bear a remarkable resemblance to Byakuya. He exudes superiority, or possible arrogance.

“Surely you know who I am.”

“Of course.” You kneel.

“It’s a pleasure to meet your acquaintance Jun Kuchiki.”

He smirks.

“So you do have manners, I’m impressed. Byakuya may not know how to choose valuable partners, but at least he trains them. “ You stand, not reacting at all to his statement.

“May I ask what brings you all the way out here, Kuchiki-sama. Surely someone of your esteemed status has better things to do than wander around the squad barracks.”

“Sever your ties with Byakuya.”

It’s said so coldly.

“He’s already tarnished his image once. At this point I merely feel sorry for him. It’s clear that he’s seeking a replacement for that tramp Hisana.” You clench your fist, but stand firm.

“It is disrespectful to speak ill of the dead. Please watch the manner in which you speak.”

“Who are you to give me orders, you are no more than a rat from the streets of the Rukon District. You should be honored that we’re even standing in the same space right now."

His entire demeanor pisses you off. You want nothing more than to slam his face into a wall.

“Hisana Kuchiki may not have been of noble blood, but she was the wife of Byakuya Kuchiki, you will address her with the same respect as any other noble. If not..” You draw your sword slowly, and you can see the surprise in his eyes.

“Then I will ensure that you are unable to utter another word from those venomous lips."

The slight rise in reiatsu makes them all stumble slightly.

“Y-You dare threaten a noble!!!” He looks enraged.

You drop your sword at your side, and when you disappear, he flinches. Your body reappears directly behind him, not even his little foot soldiers have a chance to react. You raise your hand, and blood splatters onto the floor. Jun stares in utter shock at the hollow above. Its teeth have sunk right into your forearm. He falls back unto his butt, terrified.

“I apologize, I should have picked up on it sooner. Nobles such as yourself give off a more significant spiritual pressure. You should be careful venturing out so recklessly Kuchiki-sama.”

Your tone is mocking, and he clenches his teeth.

“Why are you idiots standing around!!”

It’s clear they hadn’t anticipated the threat.

You open your palm.

“Bakudo 63, Sajo Sabaku.”

The yellow brightened rope lengthens as it wraps around the hollows form. It drops to the floor with a yell, and you just whip the blood off your arm. Taking slow steps, you pick up your sword, walking over to the hollow in a relaxed manner. It’s still fighting against the hold, and Jun’s eyes are shaking.

“I’d like to inform you that I admired Hisana. She may not have been strong physically, but she loved wholeheartedly till the very end. “ You lift your sword above the hollow’s head.

“However, I have no intention of trying to be reasonable with people I view as enemies. Anyone who thinks they can challenge my integrity with foolish words will be cut down.”

You bring the blade down, cutting it straight through its mask easily. The body fades in a matter of seconds, and Jun is being picked up off the floor by his workers.

You spare him a glance.

“Tread lightly.”

A chill runs through his body, and his jaw is clenched tightly. He yells at the men to take him back, and they all move frantically to get out of there. When their bodies disappear, you look down at your bruised arm. Your eyes only move when you hear the flapping of a coat. Someone lands in front of you.

“Taicho..”

“I felt your reiatsu spike, are you alright?” His eyes immediately track your bloodied hand.

“Just a hollow, I was reckless.”

It’s possible that he knows who was just here. There’s no way he would have missed the reiatsu of another noble, especially one from his clan. He doesn’t say anything though, so you assume he doesn’t want to pry. You sheath your sword.

“I’ll head to the fourth squad immediately sir.”

“I will join you.”

For a moment you just look at him.

“Even after all he’s faced, how does he continue to have such faith in love?”

You’ve never truly been in love, so you can’t imagine what he’s gone through. But somehow your respect for him has grown that much more. He knew the moment he decided to pursue you that it would not go over with his family very well. But he still decided to go after it, because apparently he was better at following his heart, regardless of what others had to say about it.

“Hisana-sama, I’ll do my best to become someone worthy of this love.”

You’ve already decided.

[ririretry]

The Journey Begins?

Day 1 of trying to love myself:

I am nervous (I learned how to say that in Spanish: Estoy nervioso) because I am highly encouraged - forced - to start loving myself. I guess I have tried to embark on this journey before. Still, they were all short-lived because I had other things to do - school, social life (or lack thereof), dealing with extracurriculars, another myriad of excuses that I thought of to avoid this.

I knew from the beginning that this is going to be complicated because a part of me enjoys the chaos, and that is because I feel like people like disturbed or vulnerable people. I do not know why; I suppose I appreciate the attention and feeling like people want to fix me or something. There definitely is some psychological thing related to that. I guess I felt like that people did not want to be around confident people because there is nothing to fix about them. Are we drawn to people we want to repair or confident people? I think to some, I exude false confidence, which is fine, but it is easier to be harsher on people that have themselves figured out because I think people either love or dislike confident people. Just as happiness is a choice, unhappiness is a choice as well, and I feel that I am just so used to hating myself and finding flaws that I have accepted it as my norm. That is bad! It is all a habit anyway. Just have to make a new one, I suppose.

My thoughts are very much over the place as I reflect. I am aware of my own sadness and lack of self-love and maybe why I do it. I never know the right way to begin. I am very much the sort of person that needs directions and steps to do something. I know I can research and look up hundreds of sources online, but that is overwhelming.

What if I love myself wrong?

Which part of me should I start at?

What do I need to fix first?

I gather that my lack of starting relates to my lack of self-confidence and assurance that I can do it. I am very open to change - physical change that is; mental and emotional change scares me. I am so terrified to change. :(

Weirdly enough, though, I think I am in tune with my emotions. I am not afraid to let them occur naturally, i.e., allowing myself to cry in every movie I watch because it is emotional. That's a plus, maybe.

I have to go to class now.

- Riri

[laurafrayz]

Tonight I have finally solidified an important revelation.

"He's a great man" and

"He's a great boyfriend"

Are two completely separate statements. I have known good men in daily life, respected them, admired them, adored them as friends. But then knew only pain when I tried to date them and found their manipulative, possessive, emotionally unavailable sides. There I was, excited I had finally found a good man, but then bewildered when he wasn't as good at love. Because even good men don't automatically know how to be in a relationship. Even good men might carry trauma that keeps love away, or difficult, and painful.

I was so relieved I was finally being treated well. I took a while to notice that in the end, I was still just in love with someone who would never love me back.

[theoldschoolwife]

I’m not sure but I’m figuring it out

I still wrestle with why I even started to try and maintain a blog. Especially since I’m not that pretty. I have a nice camera but I’m lazy and rather sit on my couch. I aspire to be a Christian wife, but in a major fight between me and my husband in the dark moments I turn to google on how to get a quick divorce as if that would be the solution to the problem. I know I started this so that maybe I could possibly become famous like those other Instagram and Tumblr writers. But now after so long since my last post I wonder if God simply called me to write again so I could work through everything fighting in my mind. 

- Being a Christian Woman in a day where rebellion seems so much better

[awakenyourfire-blog]

We all need a touch or word of comfort now and then, so it's equally important that we learn how to show support to our loved ones in the unique way they might need it, and realize our own needs so that our friends and family can pour down that love in a helpful manner ♡

[whisperingwillowssds]

Nacho was running straight at me full speed! He was coming in for hugs and love! He has such a light hearted personality! Such a sweet guy! 💙 * ignore Daisy in the background 😂 #rhodesiandobermanmix #12yrsold #seniordogs #learningtolove #notsoferalanymore #playtime #packlife (at Whispering Willows Senior Dog Sanctuary, Inc.) https://www.instagram.com/p/BwVmNAjJFvz/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1rsp8gwgx55y5

[kwackdoctor]

Progress Note #2: How to love yourself

Today, for the nth time, I have googled “how to love myself”. It’s that time of the month, I think, that I get depressive thoughts, suicidical really, but I still try to fight for myself and try to save me. Just a little background, when I was in high school, I had suicidal notes – plans to kill myself, notes of goodbyes to my parents. To this day, I still remember the look of hurt of my mother when she read it. She was hurt, betrayed and scared at the same time. Right there I realized that my problems wont go away along with me, it will stay with the people left behind. So at that moment, I promised whenever these thoughts visit, and they often do, that I will fight for myself. A bit ironic, isn’t it? Negating the thoughts of killing myself. But it really happens, you really cant control these thoughts. I have thought about getting professional help, but I think im not ready to scare my parents again. So im doing a “self-help”. So while I was researching, I came about a website by marc and angel and they list down a few tips on how to love yourself. So today, I will try to do that.

“because the greatest struggle in life is the struggle to accept, embrace, and love ourselves, with all of our imperfections”

it seem so easy. I mean, I love myself. But do I really KNOW myself for me to love it?

I was making plans with my best friend, telling him our plans of travelling together when this academic thing is over. I was telling him of not getting married early because I was scared of being alone. When his replied shocked me, he said, “Learn to love your company, be your own bestfriend”. GUYS. My own bestfriend, telling me to be my own bestfriend. Was he trying to break up with me? But it hit me hard. I SHOULD REALLY LOVE MYSELF. But how?

“We have to learn to be our own best friends beciase sometimes we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies. We love the idea of others loving us, and we forget to love ourselves.”

Start telling yourself what you love about yourself.

Well, this is hard. You know what’s easy? Telling myself what I hate about myself. But let’s try this exercise. I have watched a series wherein they also did this but they only listed 5 things, so I will try that.

I love my height

I love my cheerful and optimistic side (even though it is tiring sometimes)

I love how I can make people laugh

I love my kilay

I love my dimples

Be one with what is

It says in the website, “ giving up on being perfect and beginning the journey of becoming your true self”. Well, that’s easy. I am not perfect. I know that. Again, I can list all of my imperfections in 10 minutes unlike exercise 1 which took my 30 minutes to list 5 things. face palm

but being one with what is, it’s kind of difficult to understand. Being okay with yourself. Isn’t that settling? Isn’t that going below average? But maybe I am the average and being myself is okay. Well, we will update on this because I am also confused on the matter HAHA

Focus less on winning the approval of others

Okay, this is difficult. We live in a world where every aspect of your life is posted on social media. Every event in your daily, mundane life is recorded. How the hell do you stop trying to get approval of others? Whenever I post something, someone is always there to comment – be it bad or good. Maybe I should get a social media hiatus, right?

“Your time on this planet is precious:

“What you do today is important, because you are exchanging a day of your life for it”

“Don’t wait around for someone else to give you permission to live”

Sooooo, if I sleep all day, what does that make me? Still important. I think I shouldn’t be bothered by what people think about my itinerary. I will do whatever makes me happy. #sleepislife

Distance yourself from those who bring you down

Wait, what if I don’t know those people? Should I know them?

“Being in a relationship is better than being in a wrong one” – OH SNAP, that hit me. I have been with this guy for a long time now (hello 7 years), and I still don’t see any progress with our relationship. Should I see progress? But I still don’t have the guts to let him go. I still love him. But in most times, we just aren’t in sync. I don’t know what to do with it, though.

“Know your worth” – still trying, I am so sorry.

“Quality over quantity” – ah, this I have done right. I think. But sometimes, I still feel like I was choosen last. You know those scenes in the movie, where the captain chooses their team mate? I always feel like I was the last one choosen. Maybe because they have been together longest? Or maybe because I don’t speak the language? Or maybe because of who I am as a person. But I don’t really blame them, I guess it’s my fault.

Forgive your past self.

I’m not so sure about this. I don’t really have a past to forgive on. Or do i?

(I just realized how long this list is, so I will try to be more concise)

Start making the changes you know you need to make

WHAT CHANGES?

“Just because something made you happy in the past doesn’t mean you have to keep it forever” – this is him again. I think. But but but, he still makes me happy. Sometimes. Yea, im stupid that way.

Embrace the mistakes you haven’t even made yet

This looks fun. “Don’t let the fear of making the wrong decision prevent you from making any decision at all”

Well, the thing is, I keep making the wrong decisions.

Show gratitude for who you are and what you have right now.

I am very grateful with what I have right now. I know there are a lot of people less fortunate that I am, and I am very much grateful for what I have. But sometimes, I really can’t control my jealous type. They have like this, they go to this, and whatever. But I keep telling myself that what I have now is more than enough and I shouldn’t feel bad about it. It’s an everyday struggle, but I know what I have.

I have always thought that I could get anything I want as long as I put my mind to it. But there are things that I really can’t have. That makes me angry and want to throw a tantrum but I realize that I am too old for that sht. I have to learn to accept these things, however hard it seems.

“There are lots of people who will never have what you have right now. So use pain, frustration and inconvenience to motivate you rather than annoy you. You are in conttol of the way you look at life.”

I will accept these things.

No matter how hard it is.

It’s a hard pill to swallow, so man up, self!

Do something every day that makes you happy

What if nothing makes me happy anymore?

“Life is short”

“Invest in the activities you deeply care about”

“You have to experience life on your terms before you can be life-giving to others”

I really need to get a hobby. Any suggestions?

Give yourself a fair chance to explore new ideas and opportunites

But how?

Hobbies. Interests. What.

Listen to your intuition and be honest with yourself about everything

Now, this is what this blog is all about. Being honest with myself. You see, I haven’t been honest with a lot of people in my life. I told lies to be interesting. I had to keep up with it. But then I realized, I don’t really have to do that. Fuck what people say, this is me. If you don’t love me, then leave. (I hope I am this confident in real life).

“Confidence comes from knowing that what youre doing is right, and that what you’re doing is right for YOU”

Believe in your abilities.

Focus in writing your story, instead of reading, watching, and hearing about everyone else’s

I feel like I have been doing this at some point of my life. I guess, my life was so boring I had to make it a bit interesting by watching others. But I realized again, that this was wrong.

Pay close attention to your life as you’re living it

This is what I am also practicing. Being in the present. Maybe because of my work that I have missed a lot of stuff happening in my loved one’s lives, but now I will try to be there. To be present. I used to ask myself whenever someone invites me, “what will I do there”. Today, I will answer myself with “Just be there, be present.”

Loosen up and be a little less serious about it all

I guess what’s good about me is that I don’t take it all seriously. Most of my friends can attest that. But I guess there are certain aspect in life that you should take seriously. Differentiating them is the lesson life gives you.

“people with good sense of humor have a better sense of life” REALLY NOW

Lastly, (thank God), Go out of your way to be loving and kind to others too

Heh, this is hard. I have been known to be maldita and judgemental. How do I stop?

“people who love themselves come across as very caring, generous, and kind to others too”

so today, I will try to be loving and caring. It is hard. But I will really try to go out of my way to do this. I hope everyone does, to make this life a better place.

Parting thoughts: Start looking at yourself more. Notice yourself more. Eventually, you’ll realize you love yourself more. You have nothing else, but yourself, so you really don’t have a choice. I know I will do the same. This will be my self-help blog for loving myself. I will keep you posted on my “progress”, if there’s any.

Cheerios.

[shawnaerv]

If you never know love,

Then you never know truth.

[yogayoulove-blog]

Yes those are my knuckles setting the scene…lolll #morningview #learningtolove #whereilive #naturescene (at Bayshore Gardens, Florida) https://www.instagram.com/p/ChXQ_YsLd1y/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[gildenshamanandoccultsupply]

Learning to stop comparing yourself is hard, this is our look into inadequacy and affirmations to help reprogram this thought pattern. https://gildenshamanandoccultsupply.com/the-blog/f/inadequacy #inadequacy #ThisMoment #Focused #Goals #Universe #Experiances #Talent #Potential #Love #Journey #TheJourney #MyOwnPace #ReleasePain #Motivation #Affirmations #learningtolove #unique #talents #selffulfuilled https://www.instagram.com/p/BrVEh4BAOnw/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=utopjxxg1mze

[darkside72388]

Continued

Part 2

We tried, I tried. It was working for a bit, we got away and went on vacation. Thinking maybe Harry Potter had some magic to bring us closer. Success was temporary, i was committed however i was treated as a roommate. I asked and asked for attention, some sort of affection. Same request and same response. Nothing changed. As weird as it sound, I just wanted to be held . To be loved. So I started to love myself more.

New work , new opportunities to grow. In the midst of this a smile caught my attention. Simple conversations had meaning, the way she looked at me. It was all new to me. She listened and brought out a happy me.

I decided, difficult decision and one that would change it all. I was honest, upfront. I ended my 12 year relationship. It was brutal. So much hurt thrown around , tear filled arguments. I lost my love and my best friend. My only friend. I destroyed someone who was by my side for so long. We destroyed each other, enough was enough. We outgrew each other. Simple but heartbreaking. My heart sank completely.

The smile that caught my attention. Late hours talking about it all. Past , present and what we look forward in the future. Deep into the night we spent time together and got to know each other. I felt connected.

A last minute left turn. A bowling alley. A 12pk of Michelob Ultra and 4 hours of conversation. Who would've thought. Simple yet important. A new friend , I broke her heart before we even started. I could see the pain in her eyes when I told her I was choosing someone else.

M n J for 3 months, it was great. A connection like no other. She brought out all the emotions I never knew I had Met the I In laws , I spent Christmas and Thanksgiving there. I fell hard. A few days later it was over. It was painful.

Loss ,over time I understood that regardless of what's going on, loss will be consistent. The tattoo is a reminder that I will always feel that heart sinking feeling. Yet I continue to live. No matter how hard the hit , I always have to keep moving forward.

[davidwfloydart]

“The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love, and be loved, in return.” – Moulin Rouge #loveislove #greatestthing #tolove #moulinrouge #justtolove #lifelessons #learningeveryday #learningtolovemyself #learningtolove (at Catalina Foothills, Arizona) https://www.instagram.com/p/CNDpzaKLoUlSbVVBGA9JWFi2s4gxjKHjPcHFzc0/?igshid=12kccfyj49rp3

[stayygood]

This shits cool