#laziest post i ever made
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if you squint harder it's gerita.
context: lovino is drunk as shit
original
#hetalia#hetalia world stars#hws#its 1am and im dying#hetalia shitpost#might be ooc but fuck it we ballin#hetalia germany#hetalia romano#hws germany#hws romano#aph germany#aph romano#laziest post i ever made#ludwig beilschmidt#lovino vargas#aaadjfj#wxxderbxrr :: draw
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looks at you with my traumatized eyes
#omori#omori game#omori fanart#omori sunny#omori meme#this is the laziest post i ever made and will ever make but im so tired gn
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I did many many things today and now I have a treat :)
#cookie squares#congo bars#i made this#mod post#baking#this is the laziest food styling ever but i am tired as fuck so#🤷♀️
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(taken from a post about AI)
speaking as someone who has had to grade virtually every kind of undergraduate assignment you can think of for the past six years (essays, labs, multiple choice tests, oral presentations, class participation, quizzes, field work assignments, etc), it is wild how out-of-touch-with-reality people’s perceptions of university grading schemes are. they are a mass standardised measurement used to prove the legitimacy of your degree, not how much you’ve learned. Those things aren’t completely unrelated to one another of course, but they are very different targets to meet. It is standard practice for professors to have a very clear idea of what the grade distribution for their classes are before each semester begins, and tenure-track assessments (at least some of the ones I’ve seen) are partially judged on a professors classes’ grade distributions - handing out too many A’s is considered a bad thing because it inflates student GPAs relative to other departments, faculties, and universities, and makes classes “too easy,” ie, reduces the legitimate of the degree they earn. I have been instructed many times by professors to grade easier or harder throughout the term to meet those target averages, because those targets are the expected distribution of grades in a standardised educational setting. It is standard practice for teaching assistants to report their grade averages to one another to make sure grade distributions are consistent. there’s a reason profs sometimes curve grades if the class tanks an assignment or test, and it’s generally not because they’re being nice!
this is why AI and chatgpt so quickly expanded into academia - it’s not because this new generation is the laziest, stupidest, most illiterate batch of teenagers the world has ever seen (what an original observation you’ve made there!), it’s because education has a mass standard data format that is very easily replicable by programs trained on, yanno, large volumes of data. And sure the essays generated by chatgpt are vacuous, uncompelling, and full of factual errors, but again, speaking as someone who has graded thousands of essays written by undergrads, that’s not exactly a new phenomenon lol
I think if you want to be productively angry at ChatGPT/AI usage in academia (I saw a recent post complaining that people were using it to write emails of all things, as if emails are some sacred form of communication), your anger needs to be directed at how easily automated many undergraduate assignments are. Or maybe your professors calculating in advance that the class average will be 72% is the single best way to run a university! Who knows. But part of the emotional stakes in this that I think are hard for people to admit to, much less let go of, is that AI reveals how rote, meaningless, and silly a lot of university education is - you are not a special little genius who is better than everyone else for having a Bachelor’s degree, you have succeeded in moving through standardised post-secondary education. This is part of the reason why disabled people are systematically barred from education, because disability accommodations require a break from this standardised format, and that means disabled people are framed as lazy cheaters who “get more time and help than everyone else.” If an AI can spit out a C+ undergraduate essay, that of course threatens your sense of superiority, and we can’t have that, can we?
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friend's best friend | george clarke
this was a rec! smau where george meets max's best friend (and maybe simps a little)
liked by georgeclarkeey, andrew_spanndy and 3,496 others
yourusername: he told me we were going out for a walk and a coffee, ended up in the pub at 3pm
max_balegde: you were literally the one that said it was pint weather
↳ yourusername: all weather is pint weather with the right mindset
andrew_spanndy: getting a drunk call from max at 5pm was not what i had expected x
↳ yourusername: i told you that he has to be kept on a leash :/
liked by yourusername, andrew_spanndy and 8,839 others. tagged yourusername
max_balegde: she forced me to go outside and experience nature
yourusername: you're the laziest person i know i had to force you outside somehow
↳ max_balegde: untrue and rude
↳ yourusername: you literally had to be set a fitness challenge to start going outside
georgeclarkeey: not another thirty minute walk max
↳ yourusername: to be fair it was a couple hours long
↳ georgeclarkeey: please don't enable him
liked by georgeclarkeey, arthurtv and 4,857 others
yourusername: not going to tell you guys what i did today but i can indeed say it was very useless ;)
username: omg are we finally getting y/n on useless hotline ???
max_balegde: never talking to you again after today x
↳ yourusername: you're just salty i told the stories andrew was too scared to x
↳ andrew_spanndy: did you tell the spain story??
↳ yourusername: you already know i had to tell the spain story x
liked by yourusername, georgeclarkeey and 17,830 others. tagged yourusername
theuselesshotlinepod: Max's Best Friend Y/N talks Max's Embarrassing Moments, Dating and More in This Weeks Episode! (Dressed as 1920s Reporters, for some reason)
yourusername: still very confused as to why you made me dress up, but thanks for having me on!
↳ max_baledge: we honestly thought it would be funnier then it was
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liked by georgeclarkeey, arthurtv and 4,279 others
yourusername: when max promises me that we will have a quiet one and i end up plastered and dragged to the kebab shop with arthur and george
georgeclarkeey: you're lucky i shared my chips
↳ yourusername: you literally dragged me there what do u MEAN lucky ??
↳ georgeclarkeey: next time buy your own then x
arthurtv: to be fair it was mostly george that insisted you join at the kebab shop
↳ yourusername: true true but you played a part in the peer pressure
max_balegde: so this is where george dragged u when he made you leave ??
↳ arthurhfhill: i honestly thought they were leaving to do something else
↳ yourusername: @/arthurhfhill please never comment on my instagram again
liked by georgeclarkeey, max_balegde and 5,739 others
yourusername: george thought it would be funny to mock me
georgeclarkeey: it is a little funny to mock you
georgeclarkeey: plus, i did pay so i'm allowed to mock you
↳ yourusername: since when are they the rules?
↳ georgeclarkeey: since i paid and i wanted to mock you
usernameone: they went out alone and he paid ??
max_balegde: when i literally get excluded from my only two friends going out together
↳ yourusername: sorry next time i promise u can come on a date we will be a great throuple x
↳ usernametwo: THEY'RE ON A DATE????
liked by georgeclarkeey, max_balegde and 7,730 others
yourusername: guess who finally got a girlfriend (spoiler, it's this prick)
georgeclarkeey: i have never looked more attractive
↳ yourusername: i think the bloody cheerleeder fit and no eyebrow must have topped this x
↳ georgeclarkeey: brb about to post the worst photos of you ever x
↳ yourusername: okay you go do that then x
↳ georgeclarkeey: okay there aren't any bad photos of you i lied
arthurtv: jeeez whose that fine fella
↳ yourusername: no clue i found him on the street, he's free to a good home
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For send a character ask: Radahn!
ahh, Radahn… forever an enigma
• favorite thing about them
who he is as a person — his family background, his beliefs, and who he ultimately chooses to be — is so endlessly interesting to me. being a child of both the Erdtree and the Moon, growing up idolizing the Erdtree’s champions like his father and Godfrey, but being a talented sorcerer in his own right like his mother, was he conflicted when Radagon betrayed Rennala? did he ever come to resent his father, both for breaking his mother’s heart and for replacing his greatest idol, Godfrey? there’s something so significant to me about Radagon despising his red hair, and Radahn embracing that same hair he inherited as the mark of a champion. did this affect his relationship with Radagon? on the other hand, did he know that challenging the stars was also halting his Carian family’s fate? did he care? there’s such a fascinating back-and-forth between Radahn and both sides of his family!
• least favorite thing about them
his writing in the dlc… will never get over how botched it feels. and I’m not talking about the actual plot points, I’m talking about how those plot points were revealed to us in the story! the reason why everyone felt like him showing up was an asspull plot twist was because there’s no hint whatsoever in the base game that Miquella and Radahn ever had a relationship at all. as a result, I think the writers had to speedrun a Radahn-Miquella reveal plotline with Freyja and Ansbach, while cramming references to Radahn into the dlc (like the Red Bear npc, and his relationship to Gaius and Messmer) to make him seem less out of nowhere… but to me it just comes across as a rushed plotline with extremely clumsy foreshadowing. I guess they didn’t know they would get to make a dlc when they made the game so they didn’t include anything about him and Miquella in the base game so there wouldn’t be random plot threads that go nowhere, or they originally planned something slightly different that didn’t pan out so they had to rework it but were only able to do so in the dlc. either way extremely disappointing. also his promised consort remembrance weapons are the laziest excuse for a remembrance of all time they’re just the starscourge greatswords again but different. is this some kind of sick joke
• favorite line
[footage not found]
just kidding he does have a few quotes: I’ve always liked “I was born a champion’s cub. Now I am the Lord of the Battlefield’s lion.” because of what it says about how he sees Radagon and Godfrey!
• brOTP
Rykard :33 his painting of Radahn means so much to me, it’s such a fond gesture… and the abductor virgins in Caelid seem like Rykard was really looking out for him! it makes me sad to think that they might’ve once been really close but drifted apart because of the war and their own priorities, but also still cared about each other
• ОТР
I don’t actively ship him with anyone tbh nothing has especially caught my interest
• nОТР
I resent Radahn/Miquella ONLY because their relationship has no buildup whatsoever and completely breaks the “show don’t tell” rule of storytelling. we’re told Miquella admired Radahn, but we never see this until he shows up as the final boss! I definitely wouldn’t dislike this ship if they had handled this storyline better but unfortunately with how things went it’s just embarrassing to me
• random headcanon
loves the outdoors… camping, hiking, riding, hunting, any physical activity where he gets to be outside. Rykard is the opposite. Radahn used to bring him on trips and he’d complain the whole way through
• unpopular opinion
I wrote a post about this already, but I think people are too quick to assume that he’s a Golden Order loyalist who wants to preserve the world in its current state. you could go on and on listing reasons why he would actually oppose the current Order… and in fact I did go on and on about it here. I think the most crucial thing to note is that Radahn has always made idolizing Godfrey his entire personality, and Godfrey was literally banished… the Order is very different now from what it once was!
• song i associate with them
again I only listen to instrumental music so I don’t really have thoughts on this sorry 🥹
• favorite picture of them
the Rykard painting <3
I really like how he’s depicted here… he’s got like a mature, lined face, and the way the painting is displayed (in a nicely furnished drawing room above the fireplace) feels like a very public declaration of respect and admiration? I think it says something about Radahn’s character that his brother who despises the Golden Order still seems to look up to him and care for him!
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Summary: You've had a long night, and it's about to get even longer. Showing up at your friends Halloween party, you think your in for a night of being the local wallflower. However, after catching the eye of a certain creature of the night, your about to find that there is much more that can happen in a few short hours then drinking, dancing and having a good.
There is so much blood to spill and so little time.
Word Count: 5.9K
Pairing(s): Dwayne X GN!Reader
Characters: Dwayne, Reader, David, Marko, Paul, Michael Emerson, Star, Laddie Thompson
RATING: PG
��️ Warnings!: Vampire!Michael, mild violence, sexual themes, some stalking elements, non-consensual blood drinking, drugs and drinking
Note: I still need to do some more editing on this, I just was so excited to post that I had to do it now lmao 🤣
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It felt like walking into another world aglow with strobing lights from a cheap disco ball, heart beating to the tune of Rockwell and air thick with the musky smell of sweaty skin. You narrowly avoided a collision with two party-goers, heavily intoxicated and too busy necking to actually notice that other human beings existed and also needed to use the front door, whilst making your way inside.
Their commitment was admirable, not only to their costumes -peanut butter and jelly- but to each other. How people managed to be so attached to each other it seemed like not even the force of gravity and common sense could keep them apart was a mystery not even you felt god could solve.
The house was heaving with people.The halls were crammed with costumed people talking loudly over the music, drinking, and laughing loudly at jokes that were most likely only funny because of the aforementioned alcohol. You tried your best to squeeze through the masses of those hanging in the hall, slightly regretting your choice of costume. The wings were getting in the way more than you’d thought.
The costume of choice was a simple angel outfit made mostly out of spare materials you’d found lying around in your best friend's art studio. It was a simple white tank top, jeans, the wings themselves made out of wire, tinfoil and glittering fake plastic jewels. The halo was a headband with the halo attached to the top made also out of wire and tinfoil. It’s not like this dollar store outfit was that much different from anyone else’s
You’d already spotted a couple other party guests with equally low effort halloween costumes. One guy you saw in the living room passing the open double doors, was dressed in probably the laziest cookie monster outfit ever. A blue baseball cap with giant foam balls glued to them, the dark sharpie pupils pointing in different directions. The only reason the costume was even identifiable was that the guy was making stupid joke references to the kids show to one of the girls he was clearly trying to impress.
At least you could be comforted in the fact that you weren’t that sad. Although you were getting there.
The light at the end of the crowded hall beckoned you. Beyond would be the kitchen, and hopefully a beer which you could nurse for the rest of the night while hiding in a corner where no one would bother you.
The only reason you were here was as moral support for your best friend who had begged that you come out for once. “It’s Halloween,” they said. “Come out and socialize” for once, they said.
Yeah, some socializing you were gonna do. They weren’t even anywhere to be seen and the only other people to talk to were either too drunk to hold a sentence together, or their only interest was getting into each other's pants. No thank you.
Finally reaching the end of the hall, you squeezed your way past some party-goers who had decided that blocking the doorway was more important than having any kind of common decency.
“Watch yourself,” you had nearly knocked one of the guys drinks as you passed through the doorway. You didn’t even bother to stop or apologize, you didn’t want to talk to any of these people. It was rude, and you knew that, but you just weren’t in the mood for politeness.
Every surface of the kitchen was covered. Whether it was the gaudy red plastic solo cups, or the various chip bowls and pizza boxes, not a single surface was unoccupied. Thankfully it was much more empty in here for some reason, then in the rest of the house. Not by much though.
The light hurts your eyes with its oppressive white fluorescent glow, making you squint. The bare bulb flickers slightly as you make your way over to the island counter in the center of the kitchen. Gingerly you lifted one of the lids of the leaning tower of pizza boxes to see a couple slices of Hawaiian style pizza. Go figure that would be the only kind of pizza people hadn’t completely consumed.
Lucky for you, you weren’t that picky.
“Hey, you made it!” A familiar voice called out to you. Turning your head to the doorway you’d just passed through, you saw your friend standing there, having parted the sea of people blocking them much more easily then you had.
They were dressed in a much more elaborate costume then most of the people at the party you’d seen. A very TV show accurate Morticia Addams, complete with the nicely combed wig and curve-hugging black dress. She looked fantastic. You knew somewhere around had to be her boyfriend dressed as Gomez. They’d been planning the whole couple-costume thing for months. They’d changed their concept several times. First it was Bonnie and Clyde, then Mickey and Minnie, and finally settling on the current getup.
“Yeah, work let out a little earlier than expected and I thought I'd drop by and at least try to get a free meal,” Grinning, Y/F chuckled at your comment and made her way over to you, a beer clutched in her hand. “Well, I’m glad there is enough leftovers for you to make it a meal.”
You nod before taking a bite out of the slice you’ve procured. It tastes like cheap pizza always tastes. Greasy plasticy cheese, with the pineapple pieces being just a bit too sweet. The cut ham tastes more like something which is attempting to masquerade as meat rather than the real deal.
“Only the best quality pies here,” Y/F jokes as she sees the expression on your face.
“You don’t say,” you manage to reply between chewing, and swallowing the cardboard-masquerading-as-food before trying to place it down discreetly on one of the used paper plates.
“If you come outside we can get you a hotdog. We started grilling a new batch, and there’s apple bobbing. And ooh I almost forgot about the bonfire.” She was going to drag you outside, and as you looked over out the kitchen window, which showed the backyard, your stomach sank. There was no escaping the masses of people out back. However, now that Y/F had started mentioning all the things she’d set up, you knew you were going out back there whether you wanted to or not.
“Do I have a choice?” Your last ditch effort of asking was obviously in vain. She gave you a look which told you what you’d already known. At least there were hotdogs promised.
______________________________________________________________________________
Y/F’s backyard was massive. An open space of evenly cut grass which backed onto a forest which was even more massive. Her house was at the edge of town, isolated enough that the music and mayhem was not going to be overheard by neighbors.
The typically immaculate lawn was packed full of people. As you came out the back with your friend, you could hear now where the loud music was coming from. Someone had made sure to bring a massive stereo system outside onto the deck. A tall lanky kid you recognized from campus was DJing with a clunky looking remote.
Not far from the deck, in the center of the grassy lawn was a truly impressive bonfire burning in Y/F’s fire pit. You’d been over for a bonfire before with Y/F’s family to celebrate Guy Fawkes Night. Her father was English and made a point of making sure his kids participated in some traditions of his own youth.
Little did he know it would be used by a bunch of drunk uni students on Halloween to set the spooky chaotic atmosphere. Or in this case an atmosphere of drunken chaos where more people were attempting to mosh to the ghostbusters theme blasting from the speakers in low effort costumes, then scare each other. Unless your fear was getting thrown up on, or getting elbowed in the face.
“The grill isn’t far off from the bonfire. Come on,” before you could even respond or react, Y/F was already wading through the throng of people. You had no choice but to follow.
Avoiding most of the people messing around in the designated area for dancing -it couldn’t really be called a dance floor- people stepping out of the way as you went. Trying your best not to hit people with your wings was more of a challenge than expected. At least the way they glowed in the fire-light made you noticeable enough that those around you knew to let you through. No having to tap shoulders or push through. That was a small mercy.
“Cool costume,” one of the women you passed said.
You turned to thank her, and while turning back to your journey across the lawn you were met with the firm surface of someone’s back. The sudden contact caused the halo on your head, which was already precariously placed to get flung onto the ground.
Just what you needed. Mumbling apologies, you bent down to pick up your fallen costume piece. Before you could gather up your belongings an arm leather-clad comes into view, hand wrapping around the headband.
Looking up your vision tracing up the arm to the man who it was attached to. Immediately, your face started to heat up as you locked eyes with the man in front of you.
He was handsome in a dark and mysterious type of way you were sure lots of girls who were into bad boys would begin salivating over. You weren’t that kind of person, you had to remind yourself.
His hair was long and dark, but not as dark as his eyes. It was like looking into two dark pools of midnight, intense with how they held your gaze. Not to mention the face that held those piercing eyes was beautiful, with his strong jaw and sharp contours.
This is who you’d run into? Well… shit.
His outfit felt the most out of place weirdly. More like street clothes than an actual costume. Leather jacket with a leopard clawing its way up the arm which wasn’t currently holding onto your halo headband.
Your eyes briefly lingered on the man’s bare sculpted chest underneath the jacket. He clearly made physical activity a regular part of his routine.
The way the firelight played across his face only enhanced the intensity of the eye contact between the two of you. The shadows played off the features of his face in a way that was both sexy and sinister and you couldn’t decide which were making you feel these strange feelings which were cropping up.
He then smiled, breaking your reverie, holding out the halo to you.
“T-thanks,” you said, taking it back from him feeling self-conscious all of the sudden under his gaze. “I’m sorry for running straight into you.”
“No problem,” his voice was deep in a way that crawled up your spine and into your gut making your stomach flip. Damn…
Feeling awkward just standing there, you looked around to see where Y/F had gone. You were only met with strangers who had come up behind you, sizing you up in a way that made you feel less like a person and more like an item at a buffet table.
They were boys of varying stature, all dressed in similar punk streetwear to the man you’d just run into. Various shades of black with the exception of one man with a jacket covered in different coloured patches.
“Look what you found here, found a new friend for the night?” The man with the elaborate patch jacket said, giggling as he did and moving in way too close to you, causing you to take a step back.
He was a strange man, long hair which was dirty blonde, curly, in the mullet-esqu style which was popular among the more grungy youths. The shortest of the group, he sure made up for it with a presence that was large. It felt like witnessing the personification of bottled lightning.
“Marko, careful, you're scaring them. Calm down,” one of the other men stepped forward, placing his hand on the shoulder of the shorter man. “Sorry, he can be a lot.” Icy blue eyes held your gaze.
“Uh,” you didn’t know what to say. Friend for the night? What the heck was that supposed to mean? “It’s fine, I mean no problem.”
There was a pause in which it allowed you to take in the man who had addressed you. His bleach blonde hair, long heavy winter coat, not necessarily appropriate for the California weather, and the clear air he gave off of being the ringleader. His energy was infectious and his gaze able to pin you down and make you feel a twinge of fear mixed with an odd attraction.
“I’m David,” he stuck out his glove clad hand at me, a subtle smirk playing across his lips. You accepted the offer, feeling the strength he was holding back in his grip.
“This is Marko, and yes he’s always like this,” David broke eye contact to look over at Marko who was chewing on the thumb of his own riding gloves, promptly causing him to pull it from his mouth. “And this is Michael.”
The man he signaled to was the only one who’d remained completely out of this little exchange for the most part until his name was mentioned. He was the most sedate, preferring to eye up the crowd around the other men then to pay attention to what was going on, now he had his eyes back on the group, giving you a small sympathetic smile. At least you're sure he knew how you probably felt during this strange exchange.
“Um, I’m Y/N. It was nice meeting all of you, but I really need to find my friend.” Your attempt to extract yourself from this strange group of men must have seemed pretty blatant. It wasn’t that they were doing anything outwardly bad, just that something about them made you feel like a deer caught in the sightline of a predator. You needed to move, get away.
Awkwardly walking backwards, you ended up bumping shoulders with the man who you’d ran into earlier. “Sorry, sorry.”
He chuckled in response, moving to let you pass. His eyes were the most transfixing to you of all the men, causing your gaze to linger on his for a moment before you turned around. Making your way back into the throng of people you felt oddly relieved to be leaving that group behind.
You didn’t want to look back over your shoulder as you went, until you were sure that you’d gained some distance. Finally taking a moment to look around, you realized you had ended up roughly in the area of the grill. There were several cheap folding tables packed with beer, chips and dip. A large punch bowl filled with a dubious substance you knew you weren’t going to touch.
Making your way along the table, you could see Y/F’s boyfriend at the grill wearing an apron over the Gomez Addams classic pin-striped suit.
“Hey Y/N!” your friend called from not far behind the grill, holding two jumbo hotdogs in each hand. “I lost track of you. Where did you go?”
“Just got lost in the crowd, you're a really fast walker you know,” you joked, as Y/F handed you one of the dogs.
“Well, I do have a lot of people to entertain and long legs,” she responded, before taking a bite out of her food. “I didn’t know what you wanted on yours so I just left it plain. You can get condiments over there.”
You looked over, taking in a chaotic mess of a foldout table. Some slightly crusty looking condiments, sad crumbly napkins and a red solo cup which held only a couple of plastic knives and forks.
Picking up the ketchup gingerly, you went about preparing your meal. Moving about the table, your thoughts wandered to mundane things. How you weren’t excited to be going back to work Monday for a double shift at the diner, how Y/F was gonna enlist you in the morning to clean and hassle the hungover part-goers out of the house. Inevitably you would have to spend the rest of your morning before work helping scub puke out of the living room carpet. Just great.
Satisfied that you’d applied the amount of toppings to your liking, it was time to find a seat or at least somewhere out of the way to stand. The thought crossed your mind to just go back inside and hide from the party in Y/F’s father's study, which was strictly off limits. No one would be allowed in on pain of death except for the family. You had been in there once or twice when you'd been over for dinner, and Y/F had gotten permission to borrow her father's telescope. You would both hang in the dark of the office with the giant eye of the device looking out into the night. Y/F’s father would be there of course, pointing out where you should look in the sky to see the different constellations. You'd never been there without him and Y/F before though. For all you knew, her father probably locked the door. It was worth checking out if you could find time to slip away after a little while.
For now you settled for spending the next hour and a half with Y/F, some of her friends from work and her boyfriend. The conversation was good, if not a little stilted by the fact that a couple of them were pretty drunk. It was easy enough to pretend you knew what some of them were talking about with the excuse of eating so you didn't have to answer any questions or comments. Letting the comfort of familiar voices wash over you, allowing some of your composure to return. It was nice to have a moment of peace among good company for a while. It was easy to forget about your problems, but the exhaustion of social interaction did start to nag at you as the hour went on.
A few times your eyes swept over the crowd of guests. It was likely that half of them were people who Y/F knew, and the other was people who had invited friends, who had invited their friends. Strangers who had just decided to tag along for the free beer and company. The party was reaching its peak, with the yard heaving with sweaty bodies of everyone dancing, eating and socializing.
The small comforts of being surrounded by a few recognizable faces started to fade as strangers began joining the fray of conversation. At some point Y/F was pulled away to deal with something, abandoning you to entertain people you had never met before, who were too intoxicated to hold any meaningful conversation with. Now was your chance to take a break. Get some space between you and the throng.
You abandoned your used napkins on one of the fold-out tables as you began to work your way back through the crowd again. This time without bumping into any more strangers, though it seemed strange that you didn’t, considering the closely packed crowd.
As you maneuvered your way towards the house, your eyes were drawn to the people you passed by, almost like you were searching for someone. All you seemed to see were strangers in a variety of costumes mingling, none meeting your eye for longer than it took to politely acknowledge your presence or look away. Only when you reached the house and looked back before entering, did you realize it was the man from earlier you had been trying to pick out of the crowd. However, if he was somewhere out there among the others you didn’t notice. It wasn’t really worth lingering on if you wanted to go find somewhere to take a break.
If the backyard was crowded, then Y/F’s house was absolutely bursting at the seams with activity. The kitchen counters were overflowing with cups, food, and paper cutlery. As you made your way into the front hallway, avoiding the living room, you heard the sound of something fragile smash. This was followed by raucous hooting and laughter. Whatever it was that broke, you hoped it wasn't something Y/F’s parents were going to skewer her for.
The lighting in the hall was dim and murky with a smoky haze that made you cough. Someone, or a couple someone's, had decided that hotboxing the front hall was a great idea. Passing by you met the bloodshot eyes of a clearly stoned Han Solo, with his arm slung around an equally stoned Wonder Woman. Her cheap black party wig askew on her head. There were a couple others leaning around them, partially blocking the stairs. As you passed they moved, lethargic in their countenance. Nearly tripping over one of the stoners legs, you ascended into the upper floor.
It was much less crowded and noisy. Most of the people there were either waiting to use the bathroom, or having their own little huddled quiet conversations. As you passed the guest bedroom you heard the sound of giggling and low moan. Now you'd never be able to look at that room or those sheets again the same way. Gross. Another thing you would have to help wash in the morning.
You could see the door at the end of the upper hall, no one between you and your goal in sight. As you made your way, you noted that no one lingered close by, the door having a piece of paper taped to it saying that it was off limits for guests “on pain of death.” The sharpie all caps must have really hammered the point home, because as you opened the door the sweet sound of silence met you. The loudest thing which met your ears was the muffled base of music.
You shuffled around the room, trying desperately not to knock anything off one of the side tables by the door as you searched the wall for the lightswitch. It was blocked slightly by a picture frame which had tilted, causing you to try steadying it as you flicked on the light.
It was a small lamp which came on overhead, casting a tranquil orange glow across the office space. Your feet shuffled across the throw rug, as you admired the tall book shelves. Stacks of books on all manner of nonfiction topics, most of them academic in nature. There were a couple yellowed spy thriller paperbacks near the bottom of the shelf closest to the large window on the opposite side of the room. The shades were still drawn, the telescope standing before it, waiting for someone to look out into the night sky.
You felt the temptation, the draw towards it, but you knew it was probably a bad idea to open the curtains with the lights on. Y/F might come check, and you’d get a stern talking to for going in the office and trying to escape the party. Instead you opted to pull out the creaky rolling desk chair and sit down while fiddling with the flimsy elastic holding the wings to your back. They had really been chafing and you could see where they had started leaving a red irritated line against your shoulders.
Slipping the elastics off, one snapped, causing you to let out a frustrated sigh. Well, it was only a matter of time before these cheap things broke. At this point removing the halo felt necessary. Maybe you could fix the wings if you bothered looking in the desk for tape or stapler, but you really didn’t think you should touch anything. If you broke something you most likely wouldn’t be let back into the office ever again.
Laying the wings and halo down on the desk it was impressive how clean Y/F’s father kept his workspace. The desk held a glass paperweight that looked quite hefty and a wooden desk organizer filled with a couple folders. Nothing worth snooping through, not that you really felt like trying to bother looking through anything.
Stretching, you felt your neck crack, releasing some tension. It was good to have some time to yourself for a couple minutes. All you’d been doing all day was interacting with people. From customers, friends, and strangers, it had been a lot to process.
Your mind wandered back to that man you’d bumped into. His piercing gaze had made you feel both like a prey animal caught in the crosshairs of a hunter, and yet, at the same time there had been a thrill to it. Not often did you feel like anyone looked at you with a semblance of interest outside of a passing glance or a friendly smile. For once, having someone size you up was even a little flattering in a strange way. Though there was something strange about the others he had been with.
The way they had all surrounded you was a little disconcerting, and how one of them –Marko you thought– had joked about you being a friend for the night. It was almost like you weren’t even really a person, but a piece of meat. The thought of that curdled whatever sense of elation you got out of your little connection with the stranger you had bumped into. Guys like that were bound to be more trouble than they were worth, and the last thing you needed in your busy life was trouble.
As this thought crossed through your mind, it was like the Gods had heard your little inner monologue, and responded with the lights in the room going out, plunging the office into almost complete darkness. You sat up quickly, causing your head to spin, blood rushing through your ears.
There hadn’t been a sound of the light switch going off or of anyone entering the room.
Stumbling to your feet, you smashed your hip into the side of the desk, grunting, as you reached out and used the wall as a guide to try and find the light switch again. However, when you finally did, flicking it seemed to do nothing. Had the power gone out?
The only light in the room came from a crack within the heavy curtains. Their form letting in the smallest amount of glow from the fire pit outside. At first you could hear some commotion as people seemed to have realized that something was wrong, and there seemed to be some disgruntled booing.
You carefully made your way to the window, pulling the curtains open slightly to see what was happening. The yard was lit by the pit, the grill going strong and some music still coming from a portable radio. However, most of the guests seemed to be looking around wondering in their own little huddles, what was going on.
“Someone get the music working” a voice yelled from somewhere below you. Likely from one of the windows in the kitchen. Vaguely you could make out the heavily shadowed figure of Y/F striding across the yard, with another friend in town, politely mumbling apologies to guests as she passed.
Your eyes followed her progress as she got closer to the house. Before she entered was when the screaming started.
At first I thought it was someone messing around in the darkened first floor. However, that was short lived as people began to pour out of the back door, the first of the stampede knocking Y/F out of the way aggressively.
This only served to further plunge into chaos the already confused crowd of people outside. Most stood in place watching as others ran past, others started running away as well. Most likely in their drunk or high minds they thought it was a fight, the police or they just saw people running and didn't want to get caught just standing around if anything was really wrong.
As the first scream cut out though, more began to join it, along with yells of fear cut off as if severed violently. Among the shouts was also the sound of furniture being thrown, glass breaking. All of it from below you, as a few more people exited. One was a woman who appeared, from the distance to be soaked in something dark. She staggered a couple steps in a daze, before falling forward onto the grass.
The few people near her didn't even bother to check if she was okay, instead opting to turn and run as fast as they could in the opposite direction. The whole unfolding madness made your stomach drop, something cold worming its way into your gut.
The animal instinct the fear you were feeling was what kept you there, in the half light of a slightly pulled back curtain. What got you to move was when you heard the crashing off a window breaking. The thing thrown through it was a strange, almost unidentifiable mass of limbs. Two bodies entwined that fell heavily to the ground.
A man, familiar to you in the firelight. His face smeared with a dark redness, mouth pulled back into a snarl, like some kind of wild animal. Blonde hair wild, face distorted beyond anything human. Below him, the contorted and broken figure of… Y/F’s boyfriend.
His suit shredded along the chest, something looking like deep gashes, –clawmarks perhaps?-- along his skin. What got you to really step back, besides the shock, was the look on his face. A pure mix of confusion and horror, neck ripped to shreds so that it seemed his head was almost severed.
The curtains swished back into place, as you stepped away. The image already burned onto the inside of your eyelids. A permanent mental tattoo which no amount of mental coverup would hide.
Some small part of you hoped that what you'd just seen and the commotion you could still hear was all just a prank. A prank that had gone wrong, but one that was harmless.
Backing up more into the darkness, you felt almost suspended in a void between action and processing what you had just seen. More noise from below your feet, almost violent as more voices rise up. They are incomprehensible, but completely clear in how much terror was behind them. It felt like you were standing in place suspended in the darkness for hours, which in actuality was likely minutes. The hair on your arms raised, body still with only subtle tremors and jumps at any sound from below.
Slowly, painfully so, the noise began to die down, yelling faded. The sounds of breaking glass and ransacking quieted until it felt like you were standing in the deep dark belly of something dead. The only perceptible thing being the hammering of your racing heart-beat in your ears.
You hadn't noticed when the trembling had started in your legs until now. It had become full shakes, causing you to crumple onto the office carpet. Lacing your fingers behind your neck pressing your forehead to the soft fabric and taking in deep breaths.
You weren't going to panic, you had to keep it together. Whatever was going on couldn't be that bad. Or, at least if it was bad, it was over now.
The panic was sudden though, as if it was in reaction to something outside your perception. An animal fear which your subconscious had picked up on, but had yet to communicate to you in any tangible, logical way.
Until you heard it.
The smallest of shuffling, like fabric rubbing together softly. You almost wanted to dismiss it as something your mind had conjured up in the following silence, after so much chaos. The floor made a soft creaking sound, which made you perk up so you were looking into the almost pitch black gloom of a barely lit space in the office.
You could make out nothing but blackness in a space between two bookshelves where the sound had come from. For a moment all you could do was look and hope, maybe you were wrong about something being there.
There was movement in the black. As if resolving itself out of nothingness, a tall figure moved towards you. No clear features could be made out, but it didn't matter. The shiver that worked its way up your body was enough to awaken your flight response.
Up from your knees you quickly backed up away from the advancing form until you smashed into the back of a side-table. The lamp placed upon it came crashing to the ground. Back to the wall, hand scrabbling for the handle to the door you must have looked down for a second on instinct.
In that split second the figure was upon you. Up close you could smell musk and the faint acrid smell of smoke burning your nostrils. The force with which the arms of this person grabbed you were so aggressive you knew it was likely going to leave a bruise.
You let out a cry as you felt the nails of this stranger dig into your skin, drawing blood, body slammed onto the wall knocking the breath out of your lungs. They had crowded your personal space, leaning their body flush to yours, head burying into your exposed neck.
You pushed against this attacker, feeling the overwhelming heat of them against you, as if they were suffering from a high fever. Their hair brushed against your cheek, something scraping your neck. Stubble possibly?
For some reason in your messed up terrified brain found that it wanted to focus more on how much the scratching tickled then any other sensation.
“Get off me!” Your voice was lower in volume and cracked at the end with the bubbling terror in your gut. The scratching lead way to lips brushing your tender flesh, finding that sensitive spot, making you flinch away.
In response one of those talon-like hands moved, with inhuman swiftness from your arm to grasp your head. Tangled in your hair, you were forced still as your neck was wrenched to the side painfully to create easier access.
Tears prickled your eyes as you tried using your now free arm to push and scratch at the person holding you. But it was like trying to push against a stone statue, as if gravity had multiplied the weight of not just your attacker, but made your weight meaningless.
“Please,” was the last word you were able to work out of your lips in a strangled whisper before the scratching sensation began to overwhelm you again. Slowly it bloomed from an irritating tickle, to an itch, to finally a slow rising burn. As if a mosquito bite had evolved first to a bee sting and then a knife being driven down your throat.
The pain was radiant, stunning in its ability to dwarf any other feelings, almost euphoric. It was as if all your body had ever known or had been was this singular moment of sharp suffering. The feeling of something hot, and sticky touched your lips, working it's way into your mouth and on your tongue.
The taste, reminded you of the smell of oak burning and steel. The substance worked its way down your spasming throat. Your last thought before consciousness left you was how you wished you could scream.
To be concluded in part two…
#dwayne x reader#dwayne the lost boys#dwayne tlb#lost boys dwayne#dwayne lost boys#the lost boys dwayne#tlb dwayne#the lost boys#tlb#the lost boys 1987#tlb 1987#lost boys#tlb fanfic#the lost boys fic#lost boys 1987#lost boys fandom#billy wirth#reader insert#horror fandom#horror#david the lost boys#marko the lost boys#paul the lost boys#marko tlb#paul tlb#tlb paul#lost boys david#the lost boys david#the lost boys marko#trash gobby fics
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Posted this on insta, but here it is: the laziest thing I have ever made!
#gravity falls#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#gravityfalls#ford pines#animated#reel#gravity falls memes#gravity falls meme#skeletboi tag
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Awkward conversations and.. Fishes? (Steven Grant x GN!Reader)
Summary: Curiosity to learn more about a gorgeous store clerk of a pet shop leads Steven to buying his first pet ever. Warnings: Fluff ?? and just embarrassingly long silences Word count: 1.1k A/N: Okay please imagine that Gus wasn't Steven's pet already 🙏 Might make a part 2 if I get ideas. Also first post woohoo!! Made this account solely so I could make my ideas a reality. I'm a little rusty at writing as of right now, so bare with me </3 Requests are open for stuff!! (please talk to me)
"And this little guy here, He's a feisty one, but he means no harm." Lifting up a perched budgie on your finger, who seemed to have distrustful look on it's face, You smile widely at the latest client that had stumbled upon your small shop. You've always been a passionate soul when it came to animals; from the age 8 when you first wanted to be a veterinarian, which you quickly backed out from after slight consideration as you realized that you would have to constantly put down animals and see them in absolute pain. The next choice was arts, which you did took a degree in, before landing on the final prospect of being a caretaker to injured animals. From there, you found yourself reverting back into your obsession, eventually starting a small shelter/pet-shop where you took in abandoned and wounded animals, healed them and put them back to find new owners. It would be a lie if you said that you didn't miss any of the animals that were taken by other people, but it was also a joy to see them go to homes where they would be given full attention and loved. Therefore, you found yourself rambling about all your beloved pets to whoever stepped into your little abode with any interest— which is what was happening right now. A guy, with almost perfect curly black hair and tan-kissed skin had walked in and began to mindlessly wander, often catching your eyes while he did so. You eventually walked up to him and offered your help, to which he seemed ever so grateful for, even though it was odd that he didn't know what animal he wanted to adopt. This man was Steven Grant. and only if you knew the panic the poor guy was going through. With Jake relentlessly pushing Steven to interact with the employee he's been eyeing through the glass doors of the pet-shop, Steven found himself awkwardly cruising through the different animals, who looked up at him with expectant eyes. Clearly, He needed a plan before walking into the shop, especially when you approached him with a confused look on your face. "Uh.. I-I'm not particularly fond of birds, love." Steven gave you a weak smile, he seemed like he was scared of possibly disappointing you. "Maybe the fishes?" 'Or the cats.' Jake added from somewhere in the headspace, obviously enjoying the shit-show. "Ah." You say allowing the bird back onto the bird perch, your eyes shifting towards a small section of the shop where you tucked away a rectangular aquarium with exactly one fish inhabiting it. "Well, The options are very limited with fishes." Steven was digging himself a deeper hole each time he enquired about the animals like he was actually going to get one— but don't get him wrong, he was genuinely finding your rambles about every creature there interesting. So interesting in fact, that he couldn't possibly leave without getting something. So, the most laziest pet to have would be a fish, according to him at least. You eventually lead him to the front of the tank, where you lightly bend (which Steven also mimicked) to meet eye-to-eye with a goldfish. But this wasn't any goldfish, it was a goldfish with exactly one fin. "He's your only luck if you're looking for fishes." "Does.. Does he have a name?" Steven asked, trying to keep the conversation going. How exactly was he going to take care of a goldfish anyways? Especially a goldfish that only had one fin? What if it dies? It'll ruin his entire day. Maybe his entire week.
You tilt your head to think about it, before giving a soft shrug in response— which Steven admittedly found quite endearing. "Not really, He just came in like this I guess, Never thought to give him a name." 'A fish, Seriously?' "What about Gus?" Steven asked, turning a deaf ear to Jake's mocking comment. The goldfish paused for a second looking at the two observing it for a moment, before it continued to pace around again. It was almost like the little aquatic creature had approved of the name, but he wasn't planning on sounding like a total nutjob by expressing that out loud. "Hm, It surprisingly fits him." You say after a moment of silence. Though a second later, With a chuckle, You pick up conversation again. "You're pretty good at naming fishes, huh?"
"No! I just.. It came to me, I guess. Lil' fella looks like a Gus." "I agree."
After another moment of uncomfortable silence, Steven desperately tried to revive the exchange. "D'you know that Gus means Majestic? It fits 'cause it's quite amazing that he can swim with just a fin." 'Way to make them swoon, Steven. Buen trabajo.' Steven was truly getting sick of the unnecessary commentary from Jake, but he couldn't quite tell the wanker to piss off just yet. You, on the other hand, seemed to be intrigued by this rather sudden splurge of knowledge. Honestly, You didn't mind this at all, actually finding some amusement in how he suddenly geeked out. "Huh, I didn't know that." You said with a pleasant smile. "That's interesting now that you put it that way." "Yeah..." Steven's voice was small; the fear that he might have come off as weird subsided with your smile, which he reciprocated almost immediately. "I'll take him then." Your eyes lit up. For some odd reason, you didn't exactly expect him to actually get anything— Let alone a damn fish. Actually, Even Steven didn't know that he would end up being the owner of a fish, it just happened. He's technically already named the fish, it's only right that he takes it.
"Right, A moment." You nod, excusing yourself to go get the equipment needed to pack Gus away and off to settle in his new home. You come back a moment later as Steven stepped by the counter, Gus in a small plastic baggy as you balanced a small tank to put the little guy in as well as some food for the strangers convenience. Handing it off to him carefully, you nodded as you glanced at the only goldfish your store has seen be taken away. Who would've guessed. "I'll be off then, Thanks, love!" "You're welcome, Take care Gus!" You cheerfully wave them off, watching as your customer for the night took off. You sigh contently, feeling unnaturally happy about the whole interaction. Strange. — 'You bought a fish but you didn't ask for their name?' Gods, He totally forgot amidst everything. Steven had made it back home, his lip curling into a subtle frown as Marc bought forth a very valid point. The male couldn't help but sigh out loud, swiftly punishing himself with a face palm as he realized his error. Maybe Steven didn't manage to catch their name or learn more about them but as he laid in his bed, he found himself recalling how beautiful that store clerk looked when they smiled. And besides, he made a new friend— a companion he was starting to adore quite alot.
#steven grant x reader#steven grant x you#steven grant x y/n#steven grant x gender neutral reader#jake lockely x reader#marc spector x reader#moon knight x reader#oscar isaac x reader#oscar isaac x you#x reader#jake lockley x you#marc spector x you#marc spector x y/n#moonknight x reader#moon knight x you#moon knight x y/n#reader insert
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"But she ded tho" (a.k.a. the dumbest argument against Clerith) - A rant
To expand on my previous post, in which I posited the crazy, far-fetched theory that in a fantasy setting mayhap death is not the relationship brick wall that it would be in a more grounded, realistic one*, I just want to bring up a few points to further buttress this off-the-wall notion.
"Cloud can't be with Aerith. She's dead!"
We've all heard it a thousand times. It is the argument most commonly levelled against Clerith. It is also the worst (and laziest) one.
It's often delivered in a declamatory and glib fashion, as though it were some sort of obvious conversation ender. Q.E.D. End of debate. The ultimate gotcha. "Checkmate, Clerith fans!" the haters think to themselves, chortling and patting themselves on their backs for this profound insight. (Insert tasteless and juvenile comments about Aerith being "shish kebab-ed" by Sephiroth as desired.)
And all I can think is "That's it? That's your best argument? That's some weak tea, man."
Despite its myriad flaws, this idea continues to radiate throughout the fandom a good quarter century after the original title's release, as though it had never once been challenged. It is a feeble and untenable position, a house built on sand, and one that deserves to be thoroughly demolished. With Rebirth on the horizon, and all the shipping wars nonsense rising from the grave once more as a result, it is high time, if you'll forgive the expression, that we laid this cliché to rest once and for all.
(*Note: Even in a more "realistic" setting lacking any kind of fictional afterlife, this would still be a gross oversimplification of the story's themes of loss, regret, and yearning, as well as entirely ignoring the idea of love transcending death, but we'll set those concerns aside for the time being.)
Lastly, before we begin: This is not an anti-Zerith / CloTi screed. Those pairings both have an undeniable canonical basis. My aim here is simply to demonstrate that the notion that Cloud and Aerith are forever separated by death is rendered invalid by virtue of the type of setting that their story takes place in. (Something that, frankly, one would reasonably assume to be perfectly obvious. Alas, such is not the case. And so I find myself yet again pointing out the glaringly obvious.)
Now, without further ado, let's begin:
Part 1. Before (the Compilation) Crisis
In the beginning, there was the year 1997, and Squaresoft had just released their latest title. And lo, it was good. We spent days and weeks following our favorite polygon people around their embattled little globe. We fought, laughed, cried, and struggled up until the Meteor Crisis reached its crescendo, and the credits rolled. Gosh, what an ending! But what did it all mean? How did things REALLY turn out? Did we get a happy ending at all?
According to some, Cloud lived happily ever after with his childhood sweetheart, Tifa. According to others, he continued to roam the earth in search of his Promised Land to be reunited with his tragic lost love, Aerith. Yuffie swiped everyone's materia (again). Cid finally went to the moon. Red XIII opened a haberdashery in Costa del Sol, or something. No-one really knows for sure.
And so, the fandom began to spread to every corner of the internet in search of answers. Thus began the age of dissension. Opinions clashed across fanzines, blogs, and fanfic country alike. Wild fan theories abounded pertaining to special codes, methods, and blood rituals capable of bringing back our erstwhile flower girl. The fan-made media bubble surrounding the game turned into a lawless land of misinformation and vicious disagreement. None were spared.
A brief digression on why said rumours persisted for as long as they did (CAUTION: Massive spoilers for Chrono Trigger).
One side proposed a simple solution. A way to cut the proverbial Gordian Knot of our fandom. It was quite obvious, really. Just staring everyone in the face. The flower girl was dead, and that was that. Thus, there was only one possible conclusion to our narrative. Cloud's feelings on the matter were, of course, irrelevant. With Aerith out of the picture, the only logical choice left to him was to settle down with Tifa, and that was that. Never mind the themes of doomed, tragic love and the possibility, strongly hinted at throughout the game and outright confirmed during its ending, of existence after death.
Overall, direct evidence for said afterlife was scant, but not entirely absent from the story. As an example, at one point during her childhood, Aerith speaks to Elmyra, trying to comfort her, saying that the spirit of her husband wanted to come visit her, confirming that an afterlife presence did indeed exist. But for some, this simply wasn't evidence enough. And so the war raged on. Which brings us to…
Part 2. Advent Children: The smoking gun
Remember back when a certain portion of the fan base insisted that Gaia erased all the humans at the end of the story, on the flimsy basis that we don't see any during the game's brief post-credit scene? Well, that little theory was neatly undone by subsequent releases in the Compilation, showing regular ol' humans still roaming around Gaia in all their everyday human-ness. Hence, it is rarely brought up these days. Would that the pernicious notion of "but she ded tho" could follow in its footsteps, given that the same film roundly contradicts it in every way possible.
For starters, the film inexplicably bring two characters, Rufus and Tseng, hitherto assumed to be dead, back to life, probably in an effort by Square to shoehorn as many recognizable members of the cast into their animated feature as they could. But that's not all. Next we have three characters that everyone agreed were deader than doornails ALSO making appearances, first in flashbacks, and then directly influencing the world of the living. Zack speaks to and encourages Cloud during his struggle. Aerith reaches out to him (quite literally) from beyond the grave and assists him in defeating Bahamut. And of course Sephiroth pops back into existence just in time for his contractually-obligated boss fight near the end of the film. All three demonstrate quite clearly and definitively that death is not the impenetrable barrier to continuing interactions between the living and the dead in the world of Final Fantasy VII, as a certain segment of the fan base would have everyone believe it is.
To be blunt, I don't know what level of dense you'd have to be to keep up this so-called "argument" in light of this information. Advent Children reiterates what most of us already knew, that our story takes place in a fantasy setting* with a confirmed afterlife existence.
(*You'd think that the name of the series would clue people in.)
The notion that death represents, within the context of said setting, the ultimate end was already softly contradicted by the original game's narrative, and then (because that was apparently too subtle for some people) flat-out annihilated by the existence and events of Advent Children. It should have long since ended this nonsense. But somehow, it didn't. These revelations, obvious though they are, remain ignored for some reason. And so, the cycle of willful ignorance continues.
But we're not done yet. We now move on to more tangential, but still relevant arguments against this line of "reasoning".
Part 3. Stop Hitting Yourself: Why "but she ded tho" is insulting to everyone
And I do mean everyone. Let's examine this, shall we?
It's insulting to Cloud.
To suggest that he loses interest in Aerith the moment she sinks beneath the waters, or that he is obligated to move on simply because she is no longer among the living, with no mourning period, no time to work through his guilt and grief, is to portray him as shallow and uncaring, something that goes against virtually all the characterization that he's been given throughout the story. The line of thinking apparently goes "Well, she's gone. That sucks. She was cute, too. Better move on to the next available piece of meat."
Sounds pretty gross when you write the quiet part out loud, doesn't it?
It's insulting to Aerith.
"Didn't even toss the b@#h a Phoenix Down, just dumped'er in the water LAWL"
I'm sure you've all come across comments like that at some point, usually originating from some errant redditor or blogger. Thinking themselves fine fellows and enlightened, above-it-all gadflies, they provide us at length with this and other prime specimens of 14 year-old internet edgelord "humour" that carries about as much edge as a perfect sphere. Remarks like these serve little purpose beyond confirming my suspicion that our fandom is indeed plagued with illiterates who can't tell the difference between the terms "revive" and "resurrect", and insist on conflating game mechanics with storytelling. And you wonder why some people are confounded by words like "flammable" and "inflammable".
(All right, I'll put the salt down. For now.)
"The party's designated white mage dies, oh no, that's so sad, boo-hoo, life goes on," I hear you say.
But boiling Aerith's role down to one of merely that of a temporary party member who kicks the bucket halfway through the story, never to be heard from again, both cheapens her purpose within the larger narrative and denies the clear effect that she continues to exert, directly and indirectly, on it and the other characters after her passing.
Though Aerith may have departed the world of the living, the story makes it abundantly clear that her influence on it has not ended. There are hints here and there that she still tries to assist her friends from the afterlife. As an example, when the party rediscovers Cloud in Mideel after assuming that he might be lost for good, a villager sums it up best with the following remark: "That boy must have one hell of a guardian angel."
It's only mentioned as a vague hint in the original story, but it is clear that some beneficent force is acting on Cloud and Tifa's behalf, aiding them in their survival and uniting them in the Lifestream in order to help Cloud recover his memories. Later supplemental material confirms that to have been Aerith's doing. If that's not enough to convince you, though, the original game's ending leaves little room for ambiguity as to Aerith's continuing influence. When Holy sputters and fails, she coaxes the Lifestream itself to intervene, burning away the calamitous meteorite, helping her friends put an end to the planetary crisis long after her own demise. I suppose the lesson here for silver-haired godhead wannabe villains is this: Strike her down, and she shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.
So the idea that Aerith's participation in the story immediately comes grinding to a halt upon her death is both puerile and easily demonstrated to be false. But even if that were the case, downplaying her lingering influence on Cloud and the other characters in this manner would still be ignoring the creators' intent. Whether one interprets Cloud and Aerith's relationship as romantic or merely platonic, it is clear that her death, the loss of one of his closest allies, is something that wounds him deeply, and scars him forever. Two years on, he still pines for her company and desires her forgiveness for his perceived failures. She clearly occupies a special place in his heart, and her memory and legacy live on within him, spurring him on as he wanders the planet, searching for some way to meet her again, defying the impossible. (Which, as we all know, isn't going to happen. This is, after all, Final Gritty Reality we're talking about here.)
Ah, but all of this is a moot point, you say? Even if he did wish to be with her, preferring the company of the last Cetra over that of his childhood friend… well, too bad. That's no longer an option. We can spout all of this verbiage about "soul pain" this and "star-crossed lovers" that, but at the end of the day, Aerith is still dead, and that's that. At least, that's what ardent CloTi fans will insist, no matter what. So, what is Tifa to Cloud, then, by their own logic?
Which brings us to perhaps our most salient, and most overlooked point, at least as far as CloTi shippers are concerned. If all that wasn't enough for you, you may want to consider that it's deeply insulting to Tifa, as well. Grievously so, in fact. Quite possibly more so than any other character in this whole equation. And the reason why should be plain as day if you stop to think about it for a fraction of a second.
Here's the thing… if you can't articulate why you think Cloud would prefer to be with Tifa in spite of Aerith being alive, then you are essentially declaring her the "winner" by default on no other merits than the fact that she's still sucking down air. Stating "but she ded bro" means relegating Tifa to the role of a consolation prize. I don't think I could ever hurl such a staggering insult towards her as her biggest fans keep doing, without even realizing they're doing it.
Ask yourselves, is that really what you want for your supposed favourite character? To frame her as being doomed to eternally play second fiddle to her fallen friend? Cloud's "plan B"? The "side piece"? Someone who only stands a chance if her rival in love is literally six feet under? I'm sure she'd be thrilled by the high regard in which her own fans seem to hold her. (Hey, you said it, not me. It's not my fault if you don't take the time to actually consider the ramifications of what rolls off your keyboard. But by all means, keep insulting your own favorite character just to put down a ship you don't like.)
In closing, if we unearth the subtext and reframe it to highlight what people are, in essence, saying, it's this: "It's a good thing that she-who-shall-not-be-named bit the dust, because otherwise our beloved Best Girl Tifa (tm) wouldn't stand a chance."
It's a simple enough question: Why do you think that Cloud and Tifa belong together? What, in your mind, makes them a good fit for each other?
"Well, the competish is dead." ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Not exactly a ringing endorsement for your best girl, now is it?
Part 4. "Heads, I Win. Tails, You Lose": A brief word on hypocrisy
In fandom, it's often the loudest and most obnoxious voices who tend to drown out the more reasonable ones, those of fans who are just minding their own business and grooving on the thing that they like. Which, unfortunately, renders this next part a necessary component of the greater argument that I'm trying to make. Multishippers and sane, reasonable CloTi and Zerith fans may consider themselves exempted from the following harangue.
The rest of y'all, buckle up.
The too-oft repeated refrain of "but she ded tho" entails a twofold hypocrisy. The first part is:
Case of Tifa: Fan hypocrisy regarding death.
Strident anti-Clerith fans, with their usual level of maturity, will often bring up Aerith's demise in a gleeful, mocking tone that can best be summed up as "ding dong, the witch is dead!" And if the shoe were on the other foot? If their Best Girl Tifa (tm) were the one pushing up daisies instead of Miz Gainsborough? Would they be quite so cavalier in their attitudes?
Who wants to bet that these fans wouldn't be making this "argument" so loudly if it was their ship that was in question? Consider this scenario: Suppose that the remake trilogy does the unthinkable and has Tifa die in Aerith's place. What then? Would they accept that "but she ded tho" is, at best, a double-edged sword, one that applies equally to their own favourite ship were their fortunes to be reversed?
Something tells me that's not the case.
But if you think that's hypocritical, you ain't seen nothing yet. This first point pales in comparison to…
The Zerith Exemption: Fan hypocrisy regarding the afterlife.
You know what my favourite thing about this whole debacle is? When people inform me that because they are separated by death, Cloud and Aerith have no hope of ever being together again. They will then unironically pivot to shipping Zack and Aerith, two characters who are together in the MOTHERFUCKING AFTERLIFE.
It's wild. How do you even compress that much cognitive dissonance into one skull? We're talking about mind-melting, Olympic medal-worthy levels of mental gymnastics here.
Now, before someone accuses me of being morose, I'm not suggesting that Cloud hop off the nearest cliff just to be with his beloved (Aerith would not approve of him throwing his life away, for one), just that when he reaches the end of his natural life (which may not be too long, given the cells eating away at his body), he can finally be reunited with her in the afterlife.
Many ardent CloTi shippers see themselves as bound by law to uphold Zerith as a shield against the dreaded Clerith plague. But to proclaim, implicitly or explicitly, that the afterlife encompasses one but not the other is not an idea that can be taken seriously. It remains an utterly bizarre blind spot, one that beggars belief.
On a related note, there is the infamous misconception that is…
Part 5. The ZaCloud Fallacy
While this is not directly related to my main point, I nonetheless find myself compelled to address this issue. There is a long-standing confusion that bedevils our fandom, one that has its roots in the Shipping Wars (tm). I am, of course, referring to the ZaCloud Fallacy.
We owe this particular misapprehension to Crisis Core, a prequel/gaiden game that was released ten years after the original FFVII. Already, its existence can mess up the timeline, so to speak, as, strangely, people tend to treat it as a sequel rather than a prequel, and as though it were adding new and vital building blocks to the world of FFVII instead of merely distorting the original story while retreading it with a far less interesting cast of characters. It also retcons major elements of the original story that it shouldn't have (such as the events taking place in Nibelheim five years prior to the main narrative), lazily steals Clerith scenes only to rehash them with Zack and Aerith, and forces players to endure, at length, crimes against literature, courtesy of Genesis.
It's an odd prequel, to say the least, given how heavily it relies on the original story for context. Sequentially, it may take place before FFVII, but it can only be fully appreciated with the original in mind; it cannot be treated as a stand-alone story. The worst thing about Crisis Core existing is that playing it first can outright ruin people's perception of the original narrative by spoiling several major plot elements and even lessening them in the process. Crisis Core's writers are especially guilty of cheapening dramatic moments like Zack's last stand by transforming it from a quiet, tragic, harrowing scene about sacrifice to an utterly over-the-top and emotionally overwrought trainwreck. It all merely serves to add to the confusion, especially for gamers who started with this title instead of the original.
But if that were not enough, Crisis Core's reckless meddling with the story combined with the acrimonious and all-consuming nature of the shipping wars has resulted in one of the most nonsensical misconceptions in the entire fandom. During Crisis Core's ending, Zack implores Cloud to carry on his legacy, thus giving rise to the erroneous assumption that Cloud's behaviour in disc 1 is merely that of him "being Zack". Clerith-hating fans, in particular, pounced on this idea as a way to put a safe distance between him and Aerith, characterizing their interactions, whether platonic or romantic, as merely a case of Cloud utilizing Zack's memories and personality around her (Never mind that Zack and Cloud's personalities are as different as night and day).
It is a fundamental and willful misreading of the story, a gross oversimplification of a more complex and granular truth in service of a fan-originated meta-narrative, one that has been assembled in order to reach the conclusion that Cloud and Aerith's relationship is null and void, and that therefore the romance between him and Tifa remains unchallenged. (Never mind that the story is intended as more than just some playground tug-of-war romance). To maintain this lie is to do violence to the story by destroying Cloud's character arc and reducing him to a virtual non-entity until the very end of the game.
Having already been rebuked in regards to this pervasive delusion, certain fans have tried to hedge their bets by suggesting a second, more advanced version of this idea. ZaCloud Fallacy 2.0, if you will, which states that Cloud is only in Zack Mode (tm) when he's around Aerith. I don't even know what to say about that sort of nonsense. To paraphrase Charles Babbage, I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such an assertion.
I'd go into this in more detail, but YouTube creator LinkOnTheBrink has already covered this topic extensively in their superlative video essay "How Shipping Can Ruin a Narrative".
It may seem like I'm trashing Zack or Zerith here, but I'm really not. That was never my intent. So let me be clear about this: I like Zack. I just hate Crisis Core and what it's done to this fandom. If you prefer CloTi and Zerith to everything else, I don't much mind. Ultimately, this isn't about shipping wars nonsense, but protecting the narrative from such nonsense.
And that leads us to…
Part 6. I Against I: Where the fandom went wrong
We all know that the infamous FFVII Shipping Wars (tm) are as stupid as they are inescapable. Anyone who's spent any time at all within this fandom has inevitably run afoul of them and their detritus at some point, whether they've chosen to participate in them or abstain from the whole debacle. But there's a reason why this acrimonious dispute has raged on for as long as it has. Much like Blade Runner fans would argue until they were blue in the face about whether or not Deckard was a replicant, fans of this story have been squabbling about CloTi versus Clerith for ages for similar reasons. (Zerith got roped in as a "political wedge", I would argue, as much as a pairing in its own right.)
It's more than just a war over shipping, it's a war over canonization, over character motivation and psychology. Of how we ultimately interpret the story and its characters. Given the vagueness of the story's ending, one can't help but wonder and speculate as to how everyone ended up afterwards. (Advent Children and Dirge of Cerberus may have offered some answers, but they still largely sidestep these questions in a noncommittal, to-be-continued manner.)
The problem is that, for many fans, it isn't possible to simply say "It's my preference" and be done with the matter. Unlike most rarepairs and bananas pairings like Cait x Jenova, CloTi and Clerith remain hotly contested because they go beyond mere shipping, or even aesthetic preference, or which characters one most identifies with; they lie at the core of how we perceive the story and its inhabitants. In that sense, I don't consider it to be an entirely frivolous debate, just an unsolvable one.
So, what's the answer?
There's this long-standing piece of received wisdom about JRPGs vs. WRPGs, where the latter involves more freedom at the expense of focused storytelling, and vice versa. This idea might hold true to some extent, but it is not some iron law that must be obeyed without question. For a game like FFVII, choices that radically affect the narrative structure would be considered an aberration and not the norm. And yet, it might represent the only way out of this quagmire that doesn't involve throwing half the fandom under the bus in the process.
For me, Mass Effect and similar titles (e.g., Quest for Glory) have already presented an obvious solution: Let the players choose. (There is already some precedent in the form of the Gold Saucer scene, although it ultimately doesn't change the outcome of the story all that much.) It may not be a perfect solution, but I'd argue that it's far better than leaving one side out in the cold. At least this way, everyone gets something.
"Ah, but this is not feasible," I hear you respond. "Not for an Eastern-style RPG, at least. Only one of these pairings can be correct, and one must, above all, respect the creator's vision."
Yeah, look where that got us.
Part 7. As You Like It: Ship whatever you please (just stop this nonsense)
I realize that this little essay of mine has been digressive, rudimentary, rambling, extemporaneous, and scattershot. So let me try to reach some kind of meaningful conclusion here.
Much of this anti-Clerith rhetoric we've seen over the years seems to stem from a place of insecurity, whether it's murmuring "but she ded tho", claiming that Cloud was only ever Zack in disc 1, inventing a fictional sex scene underneath the Highwind from whole cloth, and so on… The thing is, there is no need for it. Clerith and CloTi both exist canonically. Even the game manual says as much, describing Cloud, Tifa, and Aerith's relationship as a love triangle. In other words, the love triangle is what's canon, and the rest is by and large up for interpretation. (Zerith also canonically exists, and we've known this since the OG.)
The true reason why this whole disagreement has gone on for eternity, I suspect, has less to do with any debate over canonicity alone than it does the sheer enmity and pettiness that it has continued to spark for so long. It has metastasized over the years, going from being a mere squabble over which pair is canon to an exercise in holding the other side in contempt. That endless cycle of disrespect and reprisals is undoubtedly where it all went wrong in the first place. (If I had a nickel for every time someone commented "but she ded tho" or "wHy iS zAcK bLoNd iN tHiS pIc?" when someone posts a piece of Clerith fan art, I'd have a pretty nice collection of coins by now.)
Obviously, we should all try to just click off when we encounter content that we dislike, but it's not always easy, especially when something we harbour a strong aversion to is so deeply enmeshed within something that we do enjoy. And so, our fight-or-flight instinct kicks in. Before you ask, yes, I'm as guilty of that as anyone else.
Still, I firmly believe that the occasional olive branch can go a long way. So let me simply say that I have the utmost respect for Tifa and Zack. They are worthy characters in their own right. So create and share all the CloTi/Zerith fan works your little hearts desire. Hire a fleet of skywriters to declare Zerith your favourite couple. Throw a giant CloTi parade through the middle of Times Square. We don't mind. Honestly.
As stated above, whether it's CloTi, Clerith, or Zerith, you can stop fretting over which one is canon; they all are. The other three permutations (Zakkura, Zifa, AerTi) don't get much in the way of canon acknowledgement, but they probably should at this point.
In the end, this is about saving the narrative from the shipping wars, as much as anything else. To say that you prefer CloTi or something else to Clerith is fine. To assert that Clerith doesn't exist in any form, however, is where I begin to take exception.
Ultimately, I say ship what you like. All I ask is that you retire this sort of narrative-wasting nonsense. It's time we threw it into the garbage can of gaming history where it belongs. As for questions of motives, character interpretation, canonization, and so forth… if we cannot reach an accord, then let us at least try for a more amicable disagreement.
As for my fellow Clerith supporters, the next time you see the withered old canard that is "but she ded tho" being bandied about in the wild, feel free to laugh and treat it with the derision and contempt that it so richly deserves.
#final fantasy vii#ffvii#ffvii rebirth#final fantasy vii rebirth#final fantasy 7 remake#clerith#cloud x aerith#rant#final gritty reality#but she ded tho#spoilers
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I have two minds to answer this, because part of me is going 'WE GOT EM!!! WE GOT EM!!' While the other part of me is like 'oh god how do I tell them. Who’s going to tell them.' The easiest way I can explain: Tom, Ben, and Harry are not in a minecraft series together, and the lore that I have for them is not based in any actual series. HOWEVER. DON’T LET THE TRAGIC TRUTH MAKE YOU CLICK AWAY /silly so I can explain properly LMAO
Here’s a TLDR for anyone who likes these guys and is a lil interested in them!!
Most of the lore for these three is based on an amalgamation of inside jokes, non-minecraft character trends, and general yogs minecraft world lore!
Tom was an editor (now has a YouTube channel, AngoryTom) and did behind-the-scenes minecraft prep for the Yogscast for so long that he was never really interested in any actual "main channel" series besides [Dig Site - 10 episodes] with Simon, Lewis, and Ben, and [Skyblock - 2 episodes] with Ben! Although he’s also played several npcs throughout various main channel series since he was helping run the show lol. My take on his character is that he’s a former yoglabs employee due to [YOGLABS CLASSIFIED INFORMATION] and now lives his laziest life ever in an undisclosed remote location. He’s also the demigod of death but he’ll never tell
Ben started doing main series mc content a few years ago, but hasn’t done anything mc with Tom and Harry until recently (see below)! His character is a Shark Hybrid due to [YOGLABS CLASSIFIED INFORMATION] who now lives with Tom at the same undisclosed remote location.
Harry has been an insane speedrunning minecraft legend for ages, but was never in any main series content bc he’s actually a graphic designer for the yogs. But he was part of Iskall’s twitch vault hunter event back in November, and he’s now in the [Vault Hunter Series - Ongoing] with Ben and Duncan on YouTube! <3 so there’s plenty of mc content of Harry and Ben, but not so much Tom. c!Harry has lived remote for as long as he can remember, locked in Hardcore, until…?
But again, I base their backstories on a bunch of kinda loosely connected lore dots that are half based on jokes <3
Below the read more includes: links to clips, compilations, and very brief lore explanations (though you can check my other lore drawings in Tom’s tag (#Angory Tom), Ben’s tag (#bedgar), Harry’s tag (#brryhrry) or posts that have any of them, which should be under the (#the outcast trio) tag)!
BEN AND TOM
I’ve been in love with Ben and Tom as a duo forever, since the TTT (modded Trouble in Terrorist Town) days, where Ben’s player model was Left Shark, and Tom’s model was Emperor Palpatine (yes from Star Wars. I can’t stand them). But Ben and Tom have been yogs editors and Behind The Scenes guys forever, so it wasn’t until more recently that they became known personalities in the main yogscast circle (4-5 years is pretty recent in the 10+ years of yogs content timeline LMAO).
Through Warhammer streams and behind the scenes stuff, I kinda fell in love with their chemistry and idiocy, and they worked so well with the “main cast” that I just had to put them in the yogs minecraft universe, somewhere. Turns out, Tom had actually done a majority of the "behind the scenes" work for the Yoglabs series (he built a majority of the main building, did mod research and testing, was present during recordings to make sure things went well, stuff like that) so it only made sense to have his character be the Right Hand Man/ Behind The Scenes Assistant to Xephos (Lewis), the Morally Questionable Head of Yoglabs.
For anyone who’s unfamiliar with Yoglabs, it’s one of the yogs’ more famous series featuring Simon (Honeydew) and Lewis (Xephos) where they tested mods! more info can be found here!
c!Tom also ended up as a Lumian (the fanon alien space species for the yogs fandom, vaguely inspired by Star Trek Vulcans) because of a one-off joke where one of the Yogs artists drew him as a star trek commander, and I really didn’t need any further reason to make him a weird little guy LDKFJG
As far as the “demigod of death” thing goes, it felt right to give him a lore thing that vaguely coordinated with the whole “Emporer Palpatine” vibe, since that’s kinda the mc skin he’s used most recently. There’s another reason there that I don’t think I’ve properly explained, so I’ll leave the rest of that be for now ;]
Ben, on the other hand, plays a shark character in pretty much every video game he ever participates in, so shark hybrid was a pretty obvious way to go. And of course, since the duo had to be in the same place… involving Ben’s shark Hybrid-ness with yoglabs experimentation made good sense and good angst. What can I say :]
Here are the bigger lore posts I’ve made so far (in the order i posted them i believe!), explaining in a little more detail plus art to go with! :] [x] [x] [x]
HARRY
Harry is kinda known as the yogscast’s token memelord? But in the ironic way. He somehow makes it genuinely hilarious idk man. His humor is very dry, witty, and sarcastic, but he’s a sweetheart and kind of a god at minecraft. I’ve been arguing since day one that this man should be in mcc but we won’t go there
There aren't many solo harry compilations, so here's a link to a Harry and Ben compilation hehe
Regarding his minecraft lore, pretty much all of it is based around the idea that he’s a god at speedrunning and hardcore Minecraft. A common consensus in yogscast minecraft lore is that respawning is actually a Yoglabs-based mechanic tied to clones and clone making. I thought it would be interesting if Harry could be tied to a hardcore element in the yogs lore purely by having Somehow slid under yoglabs’ radar. And since he was never in any main channel (aka modded) series, i usually associate him with Vanilla mechanics, and since i also view mods as a Yoglabs-related lore element, it made sense! So basically— no clones, no respawns, no mods!
except that he’s in a main channel series now. So I’ll need to find a new lore reason around that DTBJDFGHK
And his design, well… this man’s skin is straight up Mr Mime, and there’s only so much I can do with that /silly But he’s a HUGE Pokémon fan! He’s played a couple of Disaster Nuzlockes with Lydia from the yogs a year or so ago, if that’s something you’re interested in! Was a huge comfort series for me for the longest time and rly good background noise, theyre soooo good at Pokémon I promise <3
Harry does more twitch stuff (hrry on twitch) than youtube stuff, so twitch is the best place to check him out if you're interested in his solo content!
Last thing I'll say about him is that he designed and ran an original minecraft minigame called "Capture the Wool" and he and Martyn are the hosts for a few episodes i think! i dont think there's any way to explain how entertaining it is to listen to him announce the chaos of yogs members trying to play competitive minecraft LOL
Um, so. TLDR…2, These guys are basically my ocs and now I get Actual minecraft content from them which is crazy. I love them as content creators and cool guys so so much though, so! Definitely recommend listening to these idiots (affectionate) babble and ramble to each other, mc or not <3
#yogscast#bedgar#angory tom#BrryHrry#hrry#ben#tom#the outcast trio#art escapades#sorry that's so long but my love for them is showing hehe#i haven't completed decided if i want the “the outcast trio” tag to be for posts with ANY of them or just ALL of them so --#if you have a preference feel free to lmk <3#also feel free to lmk if you check them out :3 they are everything to the me!
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wait what is ur opinion on yung royals??
i really liked the first season!! a lot!! it was genuinely well done and i enjoyed it. i think they fucked up big time (quality wise) renewing it for more seasons and they just didnt know what to do with the character or how to move the plot forward. like oh my god season 2 had some of the laziest writing in the world….. throwing in a third love interest just to create a badly done love triangle ?? 😭 and this boy came from nowehere ?? out in the MIDDLE of nowhere ?? 😭 the first season was sooo carefully and beautifully done and then they just didnt know how to continue from there. it was just so lazy and very obvious that they didnt know how to keep things interesting so they just. opened the book of Tropes. as if a working class kid and the crown prince wasn’t interesting enough on its own….. ?? LIKE… ??
also…. if they had to continue with more seasons i personally think they shouldve dropped simon after s1. they should’ve focused on wilhelm and his story and turned it into a coming of age thing with maybe even some timeskips. <- ive thought about this a lot avdhfjsjd. wilhelm is genuinely such a well written character and he deserved more than to be stuck in y/a fanfiction tropey tv show. again, i loved s1. the first season is so different from the other seasons imo. but yeah. then it just turned into a y/a fanfic show, which made me a little sad:/ wilhelm deserved more than that…
speaking of wilhelm deserving more. simon is my nr 1 enemy oh my God. he could live a THOUSAND !! lifetimes and never ever deserve that boy. they should’ve broken up by the end and instead wilhelm ABDICATES ?? AT 17 ?? HELLO ? simon is constantly so disrespectful and childish when it comes to wilhelms upbringing and responsibilities like THAT BOY IS THE CROWN PRINCE !!! AND YOU KNOW THAT !! simon went into that relationship Knowing wilhelm was a prince. and then his brother dies and he becomes crown prince. and simon is like. wahh why do we have to live in secret 😔😔 why can’t i post whatever i want 😔😔 why this why that why bla bla bla 😔 and breaks up with wilhelm on his birthday. you do NOT deserve him. EVER !! and like yeah im anti monarchy too. which is why i wouldnt fucking date a princess and then complain about her being a princess and how woe is me. if simon has no haters im dead..
i wouldve loved a coming of age thing with timeskips and we got to follow wilhelms character through the years, his secret romances with other repressed aristocratic men, trying to cover up the years old photo of him and a classmate, his anxiety and panic attacks, taking over the role as heir, how it takes a toll on him slowly but surely, etc etc. so YEAH.
that’s my opinion on yr 🤍
#did not mean to write this whole essay but unfortunately im very passionate about how badly they fucked up with young royals..#anyway watch Evil (2003) <- what young royals shouldve tried a little harder to be….#could been SO good….#asks
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guys i am genuinely angry at snc right now lol
i need to vent about this bc i feel like i'm the only one not on crazy pills while everyone else is enjoying their time sksksk
snc have a constantly moving chat on xplrclub now. it has caused MULTIPLE issues within the couple weeks it has been up. prime example being that snc had to make RULES, one being NOT TO SEXUALIZE THEM. yes. that happened, within the first 72 hours of the chat being a thing. they had to tell ppl "hey, maybe don't talk about our dicks in a public chat we can see."
and many other things have happened too. some of which i can't even mention on here. and ppl on xplrclub have been asking snc to get mods or do something to help fix things.
and boy oh boy did snc make a choice lol
they made a post asking for fans to apply to become VOLUNTEER MODS. they said that those that get chosen will get perks and merch and shit like that for being a mod.
the amount of annoyance i have rn is astronomical. i literally have a headache from being so annoyed sksks
first and foremost THEY NEED TO HIRE PPL. snc make WAY TOO MUCH MONEY to be asking for volunteers. that's just the reality of the situation. they own two mansions, but are asking for volunteers on an app they CHARGE FOR? you have to be kidding me with that one lol
not to mention, you're asking for ppl to volunteer their free time on an app they are paying for to "make sure it's safe for everyone". yall got me ABSOLUTELY FUCKED UP if you think i'm gonna lose money basically burning my free time away just to mod a chat full of ppl i have blocked on twitter. PAY ME BITCH. life is expensive. how about you volunteer eating this ass lmao
secondly, whoever they end up picking is gonna have a complex. that's inevitable. even if they choose exclusively grandmas that aren't in fandom drama AT ALL, those fans would think "obviously snc love me so much and i am one of their favorites", and that's the best case scenario. reality is they are gonna pick ppl that will BRAG on other platforms and then get big headed bc they will have a direct line to snc. and then on top of that, you are gonna cause fans to feel bad for not getting chosen, or think that snc don't love them. that ALONE should be enough for snc to know "hey maybe we shouldn't do this bc it's gonna cause favoritism in this fandom that already has a MIRADE OF ISSUES".
not only is all of this an issue, but then on top of that fans are asking for MULTIPLE CHATS to exist, one being an 18+ chat. and look, i don't like talking to minors either (even tho i know i have probably gotten asks from quite a few on here over the years). that being said, i ALSO know how to keep things age appropriate when talking to someone that's a kid compared to my big ass age. and that's what chat SHOULD be for. an 18+ chat will just become a gross spot for fans to sexualize snc, or say weird shit and think they can get away with it just bc it's 18+. yall should be able to talk to ppl underage without it getting weird. they only thing yall have in common is liking snc. stick to that topic and it shouldn't go south fast. or you know, DON'T ENGAGE WITH MINORS???? it's that simple too lol
yall know i love snc. but this is the dumbest, greediest, laziest "solution" to a problem they have ever created. i am genuinely so upset at them. not only that, but some of the ppl that have said they already applied to be a mod……………… this is gonna go south so fast it's not funny.
i mean literally one person that applied i have blocked on everything bc she's fucking weird and constantly sexualizes colby and basically begs for him to dick her down, and another one that applied is TRANSPHOBIC. make it make sense yall.
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Maybe this is "chronically online" of me but I feel it's disrespectful, or at least tone deaf to be posting about films made in "israel". Maybe you could skip them at least for the time being, if not disregard them entirely? Given the ongoing genocide, it puts a bad taste in my mouth to see things they've made be put up without any sort of acknowledgement of it or anything. I don't believe it's a political statement or whatever (and this isn't meant to be a call-out) it just seems weird. Cheers for considering it if you do.
I'd like to first make a reminder, that this answer is exclusively written by mod Sus only, and should not be considered as entire blog's or other mods' (or its original mod's) collective opinion. They can make their own statement if wishing so, but I take the full responsibility for this answer.
I don't think you can make this kind of topic apolitical considering what it involves and touches. If you make a statement about something that involves something as heavy as war, it's going to be political.
It's not like the thought of "is this right thing to do?" hasn't ever occured my mind when I've seen these movies in queue and their country of origin is Israel. But I, personally, have been looking at this topic through the lenses of "separaring art from the artist." Movies are a form of art, and they are made by the groups of invidiuals with their own ideas and views. While I do understand the idea of not wanting to give an artist, group or in this case, a country, visibility and wanting to boycott them, I don't think it can't really be applied in art. Not if the said problematic target is not even the one who created it or benefiting from it. These israeli people who made these movies are not their goverment. These movies were made before the current political climate boom (the conflict itself has been going on for longer than some of us are old) by individual people because they wanted to create. The country or the people causing the fuckery are not benefiting from the visibility enough to make it matter.
That being said, I think trying to ignore or erase something that's not directly related to the problematic thing in attempt to not support it is the laziest from of activitism. It's "boycott everything russian" again. Us refusing to acknowledge these movies made by people who are not benefiting their country does not help people in need and facing horrible, awful things in their own home.
This is under no circumstances, in any form, meant to be taken as supporting the genocide, Israel or to erase the existence of the conflict and genocide going on. As much as here in the horror circles we love joking about violence and killing, causing deaths of any real life people is awful and one of the most unacceptable things there can be. We acknowledge there's horrible things going on in the world and don't want it to be not acknowledged. But this is not a place for that.
Art, that was not made to reflect and represent those awful times, should not be the victim of sins of someone who didn't create it. The artists should not be the victims of sins of their group. The movie creators and their creations shouldn't be blamed for awful acts their goverment makes. Blaming them does not help the people that are the real victims.
I'd like to imagine Tumblr, as a social media site, as a place of escapism. This might of course not be same for everyone, but when I come into Tumblr, that's when I want to leave all the real world news behind and just enjoy things I like without remembering world has awful things in it. This is a mere small, independent horror movie tumblr blog, where we encourage people to talk about movies and horror genre. I'd wish we could leave as much of these heavy real-life topics outside the blog and posts we make, even if they are good to be acknowledged. (Now if other mods of course want to be the ones to discuss these things, they can. I'm not taking part of them.)
Now, what you can do if you don't want to see movies that were made in Israel by israelis?
We tag movies by country of origin, using Wikipedia as source for these. You can block "israel" tag to avoid seeing them. You can not vote in the poll. If following a blog that allows Israeli movies to be published in it, you can unfollow us. Curate your own social media feed. If you see something you're uncomfortable with, erase that from your own exposure.
As the final statement, as a singular person in the Internet. You don't have to agree with me and in places like Tumblr or anything, I don't think we can agree with everything. But the kind of black-white thinking, where you think everything with any kind of connection to problematic thing is bad and people attached to it are bad, is not healthy. It will make you stay on your toes all the time, and it's not flexible way of thinking. You're not going to make it in the world if you see everything inside it only that way.
Focus on what matters. If you're going to fight, fight the actual enemy, not the gravel under its shadow.
#you must forgive mod sus' smooth brain trying its best to word everything but i really do wish whatever i say would not be taken wrong#it is likely some sentences make no sense but thats on me i proof read this twice#ask#mod sus#not a poll
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MvA: The M Files, take-a-peek, pt. 5
Chapter 6:
Dr C's origin story video was a 20-second one-take recording of his accident, so there's little to no room for any deviation from the movie. Still, may this NOT disappoint
Gotta love alliterations but carnage means "widespread murder". And I don't think this sort of kids' book would be willing to show a bloodbath
I just realized, where are the stairs leading to those massive doors?
A pin-up in the audience, wth? Even the guy to her left is saying the same thing
Genetic teleportation device. Makes sense cuz teleportation was the topic of scientific research & experimentation in both Fly movies but this time the bug mutation is intentional. The video game only talks about the genetic part: recombinant DNA (fact: this term wasn't coined until the 70s, so Dr C was ahead of his time). Thanks, M Files, for a better elaboration beyond just a scientific machine
Is it just me or have the illustrators eventually said, "heck with it! let's just get this done & over with!" and got lazy? Taking a look at the last two chapters/the last post, I'm beginning to wonder
Ok, we get a better visual of Dr C's hairstyle. I put this pic in a grayscale filter and his hair in the movie was definitely darker than this ash brown-blond color (I like to think it's dark brown)
That shirt & tie. So much for that turtleneck. But from what I've gathered, the illustrators for a number of kids' books about the movie were given art references (besides the concept art) from DW months before the movie came out. Dr C's swap from the tie to the turtleneck didn't happen until later in the making of the movie; pretty much all the concept art of him show a shirt & tie. I don't know about you but I wanna see that reference art, every piece of it! As a fan of this glorious franchise, may my prayers be answered!
Whozits. Lol
Srsly? Portable phones, or phones that didn't require a cord, were a thing of dreams in the 60s. And what kind of haircut are you guaranteed? A trim? A buzz cut? And chocolate tastes AWFUL after you brush your teeth, and the average adult doesn't drink hot chocolate on a regular basis. It's coffee, if anything. Or even more realistic in the early 60s: a phone that lights a cigarette. You ever watch mid-century period dramas like Mad Men or Call The Midwife? Every other person smoked back then--anytime, anywhere! But this is a kids' book, again. Smoking/tobacco use is nowadays a reason for something not to be rated G. Istg, my inner historian has been doubled over & screaming in pain since this chapter began! Ok, enough whining
The fat guy's constant *ahem* cracks me up tho
Was this presentations of scientific discoveries or a glorified science fair? Dr C had discovery in mind while the fat guy had fair in mind. Imo, that genetic teleportation device was way more practical than a phone with hygiene & hot chocolate powers, not just super scientific
Unsurprisingly, Doc had his own fanbase on a university campus
Say "they called me crazy but I'll show them" without saying "they called me crazy but I'll show them"
Ok, is it just me or did the color pallet change on this page?
Didn't think that the machine was red. Also, the shirt is now black
"Whoops! I made a mistake!" "Just keep going, Jim. We've got a deadline."
So, he's just going with it without actually testing it on something else? That IS mad
I wish we saw more of his face in this instead of the back of his head
Dr C foretold Neil Armstrong's famous landing-on-the-moon quote
O...m...g. You can tell the illustrators had the hardest (or laziest) time with this chapter. I can barely look
A PhD in dance, mind you. A PhD in anything doesn't make you a faultless god
Oh! And go back inside if you want peace & quiet. And if you must, lock the door
Now both the tie and shirt is a different color
Reclining in the trash can, lol
I'm honestly the university campus hasn't been entirely vacated at this point
Welp, if climate change doesn't work, we know where to go...wait this was the 60s. Never mind
So, you've got a washing machine, an oil barrel, two tires, a traffic cone, maybe a bike chain and...what else?
That day, the middle of September 1962, a distinguishable sound that would haunt a secret prison facility for generations to come was born. This lines up with my h/c that being partially human mentally on top of the trauma of the accident brought on some amount of insanity
That tie must be magic. It changed colors again
Omg! Just call that slipper out for what it is!
"Hey, Jim? What's that shoe thing people wear in the morning?" "I forget. In this panel, it's in a junkyard, so just call it an 'ugh'."
In the movie... "Ooh! An old ugh...I mean, slipper!"
That is one heck of a net for that tiny fishing pole
The antennae sticking out of the net
Ooh, Monger's a major now, but how'd he know about Dr C?
But srsly. Is this chapter perfect? No. But I like it for giving "human" Dr C a bit more time than just a 10-second camera footage of a hottie in a lab coat getting into a giant cylinder. I don't know about anyone else, but it gives me more of a comprehension that Dr C's a human being with a cockroach head and tendencies, not just a strange anthropomorphic bug person
Epilogue
The End! Oh, wait!
So the jetpack has a flamethrower? Hot dang...literally
Link lifting a weight with his tail, lol
Blue-eyed Dr C with a gold tie pulling out...what is that? A bra? The illustrators must hate his guts
Poor private Grime. And what are the monsters supposed to do with potatoes? I think B.O.B. & maybe Insecto are the only ones who would eat potatoes, and Dr C might try potato battery experiments. But why so many? Did Monger stop by local gleaners or a food bank/pantry? Was this a donation of charity? Did he accidentally go over the top with potato crops at his farm? I don't get it! But quoting Samwise Gamgee, "Po-Tay-Toes! Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew!" There's probably a thousand and one things you could make with potatoes. Like vodka--oh, wait! Kids' book
Grime must've been like one soldier online who said he could cook minute-rice in 58 seconds. Still, I feel bad for the guy. Do you know how hard peeling potatoes can be on your hands after a while? Ow, ow, owie...
Overall, not a bad book. Disappointing every now and then, but hey! Kids' book. It was kinda expected. The watered-down, non-violent breakaways from the movie had its ups and downs. Like providing some explanation of details of the origin stories in the movie, like why the tomato and dessert topping. Or the idea that luring a monster into a trap is the ultimate way to capture one, MUCH more scaled out and less violent than fighting them until you get the upper hand and force them into submission and/or tranquilizing them, like tranquilizing Susan and then tying her down when she became too drowsy to fight and eventually consciousness in the movie instead of luring her into a trap (like, how would you lure a confused, scared 50-foot bride into a trap when all she can think of was her fiance's safety and why people were wrapping a rope around her arm?). If you thought this book was a disappointment through and through, I read the graphic novelization, and it is a bigger disappointment than anything in this book. More watered down, the illustration was terrible, and some of the rewritten scenes didn't add up with the events of the movie, like wth. I think I threw it out
I hope you enjoyed this take-a-peek series as much as I did. And maybe I can share the second half of the entire book, a story called Brain Pain, a silly entertaining story about the four monsters (BOB, Dr C, Link, & Insecto) in the facility some time before Susan showed up. Maybe :)
Again, none of this belongs to me, as much as I wish it did
#monsters vs aliens#mva#dreamworks#general monger#general w r monger#childrensbooks#dr cockroach#dr cockroach phd#insectosaurus#doctor cockroach#the missing link monsters vs aliens#kidsbooks#bob mva#benzoate ostylezene bicarbonate
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6 + 25 + 75 - tetra
6. What’s the last line you wrote?
There’s no surprise when Brandon asks to come over after the game, a typical routine for them that they’ve settled into after games that Brandon fights in.
25. What’s your favorite part of the writing process (worldbuilding, brainstorming/outlining, writing, editing, etc)?
so. im gonnna be real. im the laziest person ever. i hardly ever do anything but just write. this stupidly long fic im working on is a complete outlier, the fact that i made a spreadsheet and filled in so much of it with outlining it and brainstorming instead of just going for it like i usually do. that all being said i think just writing is my favorite part, which doesnt seem right since ive been spending more time in this damn spreadsheet than i have writing some days but oh well. its writing, i just wanna write.
75. Is there a particular fic that readers gravitated towards that you didn’t expect?
oh. yea no yea uh so that prompt fill i did for d*ddy kink with flowerduhaime, something unexpected, took off and i was so not expecting that. honestly i was less embarrassed writing it but super embarrassed about posting it, though i think if i had gone with my original idea it wouldve been un-postable for me as far as embarrassment goes lmao. but it seems to be one of my most popular and im still confused about that, idk if its just cause its in a collection for the fest or if people actually like it but okay!
@tetrapod7
Fic writing asks
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