#laura isn’t the queen of voice acting for nothing

[jaythedagger]

laura bailey does not get enough credit for how brilliant her delivery was on “are you wearing my BACKPACK?” as abby. deserves an emmy on its own. the pure rage and horror. she wants her things back right this instant or she will commit heinous crimes. bonus: the disappointment in her voice after lev asks if literally anyone finds her jokes funny and she goes “…no” with the saddest tone i’ve ever heard

[macbetha]

So very excited to share this! It’s a playlist for my upcoming Free! fic, This Heart of Mine, the rewritten sequel to Eyes Wide Open All the Time. You can listen to the playlist on YouTube; this list simply helps define who or what a song represents to me. This list also includes some lyrics that you may want to pay special attention to. I recommend reading the lyrics by themselves before listening to the playlist. Mind you - some of these lyrics only act as symbolism. Some mean more. Some songs have connections. Some don’t. ;) *go girl give us nothing* List below! 

 THIS HEART OF MINE: PLAYLIST GUIDE 

Theme: Bring Me The Horizon feat. Halsey - In The Dark (MTLT / amo version) Oh so tall, it broke the fourth wall Guess our fairytale had a few plot holes Don’t you know you’ve lost control ↳ Honorable Mentions: ✧ grandson - Bury Me Facedown When I go into the ground I won’t go quietly I’m bringing my crown I won’t get tired Set the town on fire Thinking that they’ve won It’s only just begun  ✧ Lorde - Everybody Wants to Rule the World ✧ Ry X - YaYaYa ✧ Rihanna - Goodnight Gotham

CHARACTERS

✦ Haruka ✧ WDL - Monster vs Angel Got my own monster Nobody but me  Got my own angel  I would never call him enemy He’s the good god I need  But both of the sides Fight for me  ✧ Mumford and Sons - Broken Crown I’ll never be your chosen one In this twilight  How dare you speak of grace But in this twilight Our choices seal our fate I’ll crawl on my belly till the sun goes down I’ll never wear your broken crown  ✧ Lia Marie Johnson - DNA Dark as midnight 6 Pack Coors Light You don’t look the same Past my bedtime Blue and red lights come take you away I won’t be like you Fighting back, I’m fighting back the truth Eyes like yours Can’t look away But you can’t stop DNA 

✧ Cat Power - Sea of Love Come with me, my love To the sea, the sea of love ✧ Al Green - Love and Happiness (side note: this if my favorite song of all time) Love and happiness Something that can make you do wrong And make you do right 

✦ Makoto ✧ The Oh Hellos - Soldier, Poet, King There will come a soldier Who carries a mighty sword He will tear your city down Oh ley, oh lei, oh lord ✧ Labrynth - Still Don’t Know My Name I took your heart I did things to you only lovers would only do in the dark I made you a god Priests, popes and preachers would tell me I did wrong ✧ The Civil Wars - Devil’s Backbone Don’t care if he’s guilty Don’t care if he’s not He’s good and he’s bad and he’s all that I got Oh lord, I’m begging you, please Don’t take that sinner from me  ✧ Sleeping At Last - Make You Feel My Love (Cover) I could make you happy Make your dreams come true There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do Go to ends of the earth for you To make you feel my love  ✦ Sousuke ✧ Angel Haze - Detox You dance in a cage with some rats in it I’m about chemistry, you just react to me God might turn us to ash, baby I might just taste your last stars tonight  We were gods in a world that did nothing but doubt us But fuck it, I got us, from the dirt with the flowers Put in work in the shower ✧ Kaleo - No Good  You better start runnin’ When you hear the man coming It won’t do you no good Kiss your baby goodbye Come on love, it’s all right Heaven knows they wanna break you apart  ✧ The Oh Hellos - The Lament of Eustice Scrubb Brother, forgive me We both know I’m the one to blame When I touched the water They told me I could be set free ✦ Rin ✧ Halsey - Young God (Lullaby / Music Box Intro, Live from Webster Hall) Running, running, running And we’ll be running, running, running again ✧ SZA - Good Days Tell me I’m not my fears, my limitations I’ll disappear I gotta keep from losing the rest of me Chasing a fountain of youth that’s in the present I’ll await my armored fate with a smile Still wanna try, I still believe in good days ✧ Lola Blanc - Angry Too Does it get your blood boiling? Does it make you see red? Cause it gets my blood boiling It would eat you like poison if you knew what I knew I don’t wanna drink the venom they made me I don’t wanna be controlled by the past But boy, if you were me Could you really blame me?  ✧ Kendrick Lamar - u And if this bottle could talk: I cry myself to sleep, everything is your fault Because you shook as you knew confinement was needed I know your secrets Don’t let me tell them to world  About the shit you thinking  And the time that you - I’m ‘bout to hurl  I’m fucked up But I ain’t as fucked up as you ✧ Halsey - More Wooden floors, little feet Flower bud, concrete A little screen, a photograph Mine to take I still believe it won’t be like before I’ve loved you for all of my life ✦ Nao ✧ Johnny Hollow - Worse Things Anger grew like ecstasy And Leda threw the swan on me There are worse things, perverse things You should answer when the phone rings There are worse things I could do ✧ Young Heretics - Bones of a Rabbit You play with wolves But you sleep with the bones of the rabbit  You have conquered cities And torched the mighty sea You may keep yourself afloat But you cannot outswim me  ✧ Phantogram - Black Out Days (Future Islands Remix) Hide the sun  I will keep your face out of my mind  I’m hearing voices all the time And they’re not mine  Haunting my mind ✦ Natsuya ✧ Gang of Youths - Achilles, Come Down Remember your virtue  Redemption lies plainly in the truth Where you go, I’m going When you jump, I’m jumping There is no me without you  Today of all days See how the most dangerous thing is love ✧ Florence + The Machine - Cosmic Love The stars, the moon They have all been blown out You left me in the dark ✦ Ikuya ✧ Penelope Scott - Cigarette Ahegao So like, I guess I call it the sophomore slump Always crying and always drunk A few dead, more gone, the rest well on their way Thanks! I hate it Everyone that I love is stuck Because this, that, the other, and the state fucked up We covered it in a class that I’m about to fail  ✧ 100 gecs, Laura Les, Dylan Brady - Money Machine Tell me what's the deal, I've been trying to go to bed I've been up for days, I've been trying to get ahead Said it all before, and I'll say it once again I'm better off alone ✧ Halsey - Clementine  Through a breakdown or a blackout Would you make out with me Cause I don’t need anyone I just need everyone and then some ✦ Hiyori ✧ Florence + The Machine - Seven Devils Holy water cannot help you now A thousand armies couldn’t keep me out I don’t want your money I don’t want your crown See I’ve come to burn your kingdom down ✧ Michael Buble - Feeling Good (Cover) It’s a new life for me This old world is a new world And a bold world for me Freedom is mine And I know how I feel I’m feeling good ✦ Asahi ✧ Sam Henshaw - Broke If I wasn’t broke Would you spend more time with me Like you said you’d do Tell me what I’m supposed to do Cause the only thing I need Is to be loved by you  ✧ Mikky Ekko - Smile Smile, the worst is yet to come We’ll be lucky if we ever see the sun ✦ Aki ✧ Aly & AJ - Church I did bad things, can’t you see it on my face? I get caught in every lie I need redemption for sins I can’t mention For all the things I can’t reverse For all the places where it hurts ✧ ZZ Ward - Ghost Here the devil call out my name I’ve broken promises, burning flame God knows, darling God knows I gave Now the truth cuts like a knife ✦ Nii ✧ Of Mice and Men - My Understandings  Keep in mind that I’m a sore eye With blurry vision  ✧ Neoni - Outlaw They say that I’m wanted Hear the whispers in the street You better start running Cause nothing scares me  Faster, faster You’re the one I’m after  You built a fortress But I’ll never kiss the ring I’m my own king

✦ Gou ✧ Melanie Martinez - Lunchbox Friends We can be friends if you wanna be But only till the clock hits three I don’t want no lunchbox friends, no I want someone that binds the ends, no Come to my house, let’s die together Friendship that will last forever ✧ Maroon 5 - Come to the Water Come away little light Come away to the darkness Away from the life that you always knew Come away little lamb Come away to the water To the arms that are waiting only for you ✦ Isuzu ✧ Jessie Reyez - NO ONE’S IN THE ROOM  Spent my whole life being graded, being told I’m not enough Being told go find the one and sit and wait for death to come I don’t want to I need to talk to God There’s things I just don’t understand Like who am I when no one’s in the room EMI - Bad Friends Yeah, I got some bad friends No you cannot have them If you wanna talk to them  You talk to me, yeah We don’t fuck around with just anybody, yeah

✦ Takuya ✧ Imagine Dragons - Ready, Aim, Fire Off in the distance, there is resistance Bubbling up and festering Here in the casing Shaking and pacing This is the tunnel’s light Blood in the writing, stuck in the fighting Look through the rifle’s sight ✧ Billie Eilish - you should see me in a crown (acapella) Bite my tongue Bide my time Wait till the world is mine, ocean eyes Count my cards Watch them fall  Blood on a marble wall You should see me in a crown I’m gonna run this nothing town Watch me make ‘em bow One by one ✦ Kinjou ✧ Urban Country - Knife and Stone Tell me, have you ever seen a mirror Mirror in the middle of the forest Just waiting for the rain or the crown I’ve been up for thirty days Someone point to lost and found Ain’t no blood in the temple Just a knife and stone

✦ Mikhail ✧ Elsie Lovelock - Friends on the Other Side (Cover) The cards, the cards The cards will tell The past, the present, and the future as well I got voodoo, I got hoodoo I got things I ain’t even tried And I got friends on the other side I hope you’re satisfied, but if you ain’t Don’t blame me You can blame my friends on the other side ✦ Ryuuji ✧ elbow - Grounds for Divorce I’ve been working on a cocktail Called Grounds for Divorce Down comes him on sticks but then he kicks like a horse There's a hole in my neighborhood Down which of late I cannot help but fall ✧ Mumford and Sons - The Enemy I am not the enemy It isn’t me, the enemy I came and I was nothing So why did you choose to lean on A man you knew was falling? ✦ Nadia ✧ Halsey - Castle (Orchestral Version) They wanna make me their queen  There’s an old man  Sitting on the throne  Saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut I’m headed straight for the castle

THEMES: GROUPS

✦ FREEBIRD ✧ Kaleo - Way Down We Go Oh father, tell me Do we get what we deserve They will run you down Down till you fall They will run you down Down till you crawl Till you can’t crawl no more And way down we go ✦ ROUGH RABBIT ✧  Imagine Dragons - Who We Are Up on the mountain Down in the king's den  It's who we are Doesn't matter if we've gone too far Doesn't matter if it's not okay Doesn't matter if it's not our day ✦ DIAMONDBACK ✧ Florence + The Machine - Bedroom Hymns This is good a place to fall as any We’ll build our alter here  In the wine, the women, the bedroom hymns Such selfish prayers, I can’t get enough I’m not here looking for absolution Because I’ve found myself an old solution

✦ HONEYBLADE ✧ Megan Thee Stallion and Normani - Diamonds I love me this much My pear-shape all dripped up He want me to be a little more lady-like? Come through with my girls and beat your ass on ladies night ✦ BLOODHOUNDS ✧ Angel Haze - The Wolves Nothing left out there for me  I left my fucking heart out at the sea This shit sounds like the danger zone  I’m the big bad wolf  Gonna take the throne 

THEMES: PAIRINGS 

✦ Makoto + Haruka ✧ Phoebe Bridgers - Smoke Signals One of your eyes is always half shut Something happened when you were a kid I didn’t know you then and I’ll never understand why It feels like I did ✧ Radical Face - Welcome Home Peel the scars from off my back I don’t need them anymore I’ve come home ✧ The Track Team - Heart Chakra ✧ Blackmill - Redemption ✦ Sousuke + Rin ✧ Kaleo - Bang Bang (Cover) Seasons came and changed the times I grew up, I called him mine He would always laugh and say: “Remember how we used to play? Bang, bang.” ✧ Zayn - Good Guy I’m not a good guy But I know you’re mine (bang) I know you’re mine (bang, bang) ✧ L'Orchestra Cinématique - Crazy In Love (Instrumental Cover)

✦ Natsuya + Nao ✧ Cosmo Sheldrake - The Moss But have you heard the story Of the rabbit in the moon? Halsey - Colors Your little brother never tells you But he loves you so I hope you make it to the day you’re 28 years old 

✦ Hiyori + Ikuya ✧ Elvis Drew - Where Are You  I been trying to figure out where you from Is it the moon? Is it earth? Is it this place, where nothing is worse?  Nothing can compare to the life we had My dear just grab my hand and let me take you To my wonderland ✧ Swae Lee - Sunflower Some things you just can’t refuse I’m not tryna lose

✦ Isuzu + Gou ✧ Snow Patrol - The Golden Floor I’m a peasant in your princess arms Penniless with only charm

[spn-meanttobe]

Summaries Part One [1-50]

Claiming Info -- FAQs/Rules The first Claims post will be a separate post going up on Saturday, November 7th at 12 pm EST. The second Claims post will be a separate post going up on Sunday, November 8th at 12 pm EST.

1. A Cowboy's Touch Abigail Jones intends to spend just one summer in middle-of-nowhere Montana with her Aunt Lucy. Time away from her job is just what Abigail needs to reassess her life. The slow pace has her breathing deeply for the first time in years. And the majestic scenery encourages her to get reacquainted with herself... and God. What she didn't count on was the handsome widowed cowboy who owns the ranch where her aunt lives. When the rancher loses his daughter's nanny, Abigail decides to lend a hand for the summer. Wade Ryan can't help being attracted to Abigail. But he's given up everything to protect his daughter, and he's not about to risk it all on a pretty face. 2. A Different Kind of Man Emalea LeBlanc is a different kind of woman. Nicknamed "Doc" by the locals, she's a psychologist, a member of the volunteer search and rescue team and an avid motorcycle enthusiast. But she's haunted by memories of an abusive father and relationships with men who haven't been much better. What she needs is a different kind of man. Someone she can trust. Someone who won't hurt her. Jackson Cooper is the new investigator in Cypress Landing, and Emalea believes she knows his type – big, strong, overbearing. Dangerous. But Jackson has a tragic past of his own. And he's not exactly the kind of man he appears to be…. 3. A Forever Kind of Cowboy She wasn't the kind of woman who would spend the night with a stranger, yet runaway bride Lori Ashford shared one night and so much more with sexy Cord McVane. The innocent beauty had only come to Cord's isolated cabin seeking shelter, but when her rugged protector showed her a passion like no other, she was lost. For Lori had long dreamed of sharing her heart with a strong, honorable man – a man like Cord. And now that she was carrying his child, she hoped this brooding loner could forget his painful past and be her forever man. 4. A Little Christmas Romance There's no such thing as second chances, and Brooke would know. This Christmas will be spent alone and uncelebrated, same as the last. It doesn't matter that she's a disgruntled mall elf, standing next to a chimney-scented Santa with the most annoying co-worker ever. It doesn't make Christmas more magical. It's just another day to endure, and the holiday can't pass fast enough. That is, until her old flame, Chris, spots her. After taking a picture with Brooke in her elf costume, things take an unexpected turn. Maybe getting through the night won't be so difficult after all. 5. A Voice in the Dark No one knew what Noah Graydon looked like, but they'd all heard the rumors. How he'd been broken, even scarred, on his last case. How he never showed his face…until the day he took an overwhelming interest in one very special agent. Angel Carter would have been a serial killer's next victim if not for Noah. The rescue gave her a glimpse into his world of shadows – yet she dared to want more. To really know if the passion between them was real. They would have to come face-to-face if the killer was to be caught – and Noah could only conceal his body from Angel for so long... 6. Abby and the Bachelor Cop Bride-to-be Abigail Callahan has her life mapped out. Good career, wealthy fiancé – it's perfect... too perfect. Then sexy bad-boy-turned-cop Raff Finn reenters Abby's life, landing her with an adorable homeless dog called Kleppy and a whole lot of trouble... Raff's teenage recklessness once broke them apart, but he's not about to let his childhood sweetheart marry the wrong guy. With help from Kleppy and some Banksia Bay magic, Raff plans to reawaken the Abby he's always loved. 7. After Dark When a shocking scandal exposes southern secrets... As the blazing heat of summer gives way to sultry September, a shroud of suspicion settles over Noble's Crossing, a sleepy Alabama town. Nothing is as it seems--and never will be again. Lane Noble Graham stands accused of murdering her ex-husband. And the one man who can help, Johnny Mack Cahill, vowed never to return to the town that scorned him--or the woman whose love he knew he didn't deserve. ...No one is safe from cold-blooded murder. From the rusted-out trailers on the wrong side of the river to the stately pillared mansions along Magnolia Avenue, everybody has something to hide--but one secret could make Lane and Johnny Mack the next targets of a twisted killer, who's struck once and is bent on striking again... 8. Alena The wild heart of a warrior beat in the breast of Alena, daughter to a queen and mother to a king. A Celtic princess, she resolved never to bend to Roman rule. But how could she foresee that the iron fist of Rome would stoke her soul with the velvet glove of passion. Marcus Valerius, Prefect of the Seventh Legion, had proven himself many times over in combat. Now newly come to Britannia, he would ensure the peace – despite the wiles of a tall, tawny-haired barbarian goddess with witchcraft in her lips! 9. Bayou Whispers Plagued by nightmares and fractured memories, Laura Larame returns to her childhood home in the Louisiana bayou, where her mother vanished and she almost drowned. She searches for answers with the handsome Creole who saved her once before. A man who holds the dark magic that isn't finished with her yet. Since childhood, Drew Michel has seen death and the spirits who walk the halls of his family’s ancestral home, and they are warning him—Laura will die. Deep in the swamp, an ancient ritualistic clan is planning to claim her life. Can he defeat the evil that demands her blood and save the woman he has grown to love, or will the bayou claim them both in a demon’s ultimate sacrifice? 10. Big Girls Don't Cry Thanks to a devastating revelation about her husband, Reenie Holbrook's once-perfect marriage is over. For eleven years she had the life she wanted--and now it's gone. Reenie decides that the first step in recovering from her ordeal is to find work; after all, she has three young children to support. She's thrilled when she lands a job at Dundee High teaching history--until Isaac Russell, the man who triggered the unraveling of her marriage, accepts a temporary position teaching science. Then she's tempted to quit. Reenie doesn't care if the whole town admires Isaac... and she won't admit that, secretly, she admires him, too. She doesn't want to see him or his sister in "her" town. But a friendship with the most unlikely woman leads to a relationship with the most unlikely man.. 11. Boss Man The permanent temporary... Blake Kemp was a man who knew his own mind and was as stubborn as the day is long in Jacobsville, Texas. As the town's leading lawyer, he had a reputation to uphold, and he didn't want the tender ministrations of his assistant to get in his way -- even if he desperately needed her, since those big boots of his did have a tendency to step on toes... So, of course, the boss man blew up at pretty, gentle Violet, for having the nerve to, of all things, step on his toes, causing her to leave him in a cloud of Texas dust. But being a smart as well as hardheaded man, Blake could soon see that without his guiding light, his life would be in darkness. Only one thing to do -- hire her back and make sure that business didn't mess with matters of the heart...on or off the job! 12. Bound to the Sicilian's Bed Rocco's outrageous proposition: His estranged wife will spend one final weekend in his bed! When Rocco's runaway wife asks for a divorce, the Sicilian billionaire seizes his chance! They've never discussed their painful past, but this is the perfect opportunity to get Nicole out of his system for good. He offers her a deal: if Nicole wants to move on with her life, she will be his one last time! 13. Brothers Without Borders For Avery Grey, life wasn't easy. He was smaller than most guys and nerdy, a real prize winner. And, as if this wasn't enough, he was gay and in love with the one person he knew it was wrong to desire. Rather than deal with the heartbreak, he chose to dedicate himself to medical school. Hunter Grey, the tough guy athlete tried to focus on everything other than the one person who caused the ache inside his heart. For years, he had managed to keep his secret locked up inside him. Although some of his teammates didn't know he was gay, this was the least of his worries. His biggest secret haunted him and had him waking up in the middle of the night soaked to the bone in sweat. The guilt and disgust within him tore him apart each day. When secrets are exposed, how will an unconventional love between brothers change the lives of these two men? Can their bond and love for each other survive and flourish, or will it ultimately rip them apart? 14. Claimed by a Vampire Beautiful and independent, writer Yvonne Dupuis is used to taking care of herself. But when she moves into her new apartment and senses a demon watching her every move, stalking her at every turn, she has no choice but to put her life in the hands of a dangerously sexy vampire. From the first whiff of Yvonne's intoxicating scent, Investigator Creed Preston knows his client has something to fear. Under Creed's protection, she will be drawn irresistibly in by his secrets and experience the sheer force of immortal desire. And not a moment too soon. For the evil hunting her isn't acting alone – and he won't stop until he claims her for his very own…. 15. Closer Encounters To Drew "The Riever" McDowell, this seemed like a fairly straightforward assignment: track down Tracy Brandt and find out her connection to a top secret mission. But when Drew finds her, he realizes Tracy has a mission of her own – solving the sixty-year-old murder of Trixie Halston, a mysterious, mesmerizing singer of the 1940s. In fact, Tracy's obsession with Trixie goes beyond interest – at times she actually seems to become Trixie. She goes from demure but contemporary woman to the brazen big band singer on a dime. And the scary thing is – Drew is falling hard. For both of them… 16. Club Arcana: Operation Janus Beneath librarian Angus McAslan's respectable demeanor thrums the heart of an adventurer. He dreams of traversing the globe, exploring ancient ruins, and discovering amazing scientific breakthroughs. And unbeknownst to even his dear devoted mother, he's just put the finishing touches on his own epic novel about a swashbuckler on Venus-- complete with illustrations! But after inadvertently reciting a summoning spell, Angus finds himself thrust into an adventure beyond even his own wildest imaginings. Suddenly, demon-possessed pupils try to kill him. Half-human creatures stalk him. His mother reveals herself as a witch, and his wizard uncle proclaims it high time Angus joins the family business. Complicating matters: the exquisitely handsome young man--bearing an uncanny resemblance to the aforementioned Venusian swashbuckler--sent by his uncle to collect Angus, and the suave, aristocratic warlock who materializes with dire warnings of a resurrected Elder God called Janus. 17. Dark Descent For each, there could be only one. They came from the darkest places: secluded monasteries, the Carpathian mountains, galaxies under siege. They were men with the blackest pasts--warriors, vampire monks, leaders of armies--but whose passions burned like dying stars. They had one purpose: to find those women who fulfilled them, completed them, and made them rage with a fire both holy and profane. They sought soul mates whose touch consumed them with desire, yet whose kisses refreshed like the coolest rain. And each man knew that for him there was only one true love--and in finding her, he would find salvation. 18. Dark Temptation Had special-effects genius Jason McLain really murdered his wife, as the tabloids claimed? Valerie Wiggins approached his spooky old house, hoping to convince him to help make their Halloween charity event truly frightening. But when he opened the door, her heart raced not with fright but sizzling arousal. Jason feared caring for Val would put her in danger, but could helping him face his demons silence her own? 19. Deadly Gamble Mojo's got an uncanny knack for winning at slots, but her home sweet home is Bad-Ass Bert's Biker Saloon. She'd love to go undercover with an irresistibly hot cop, but he's got baggage as big as his biceps. Mojo survived a mysterious childhood tragedy, but she's never quite figured out who she really is or how to get on with her life. Now the wisecracking Mojo is seeing ghosts – the ectoplasmic kind – and turning up baffling clues to her real identity. And she'll need all her savvy and strange new talent to keep someone from burying her – and the truth – for keeps. 20. Decadent Club Casablanca – an exclusive gentlemen's club where exotic hostesses cater to the every need of high-stakes gamblers, politicians and big-business execs. No rules apply. And no unescorted women are allowed. Ever. But Ally Danner has to get in – to rescue her sister from the club's obsessive owner, Jason Aragon. And undercover FBI agent Sam Sinclair is just the man to help her. In return she'll use her inside knowledge to get Sam the evidence he needs to put Jason away. Only, once they get caught up in the club's hedonistic allure, the only favors they end up trading are sensual…. 21. Deception Cove In the world of Harmony, Rainshadow Island is home to a mysterious preserve, secrets that have been kept for centuries, and a treasure worth killing for... As a light-talent, Alice North has the rare ability to make things disappear, including herself--a gift that comes in handy during her magic act with her dust bunny Houdini. Business mogul Drake Sebastian is day-blind, since his sight was nearly destroyed in a lab accident. But he's the one man who can see Alice when she disappears--and he needs her. On Rainshadow Island, two dangerous Old World crystals are missing, igniting a paranormal storm. Drake thinks Alice is the key to finding them, and proposes they head there, but only after a Marriage of Convenience. Alice's honeymoon on Rainshadow is guaranteed to be memorable, as the island--and the passion between her and Drake--is about to explode... 22. Defender Dragon Lucas is a prince and a dragon shifter who left his country to become a bodyguard at Protection, Inc., an all-shifter private security company. Then his past caught up with him, forcing him home for an arranged marriage to a princess who isn't his mate. Neither of them wants the match, but they can't escape it… unless one of them finds their true mate first. Journey Jacobson is a free-spirited backpacker traveling the world. When she runs out of money, it looks like her adventuring days have come to an end. Then she attends a lavish ball to celebrate the upcoming engagement of Prince Lucas. Sparks fly between Lucas and Journey until she flees at midnight, leaving behind nothing but a shoe. Lucas sets out to find his mate, but that's just the beginning of his quest. Can he protect her from the mysterious assassins trying to kill her? And can restless Journey and lonely Lucas take the biggest risk of their adventurous lives, and open their wounded hearts to love? 23. Delicious Cal Buchanan needs a top-flight chef to take over his failing Seattle restaurant, The Waterfront. He can afford to hire the best in town – the only problem is that the best happens to be his ex-wife, Penny Jackson. Penny really needs this opportunity, but she doesn't need the distraction of working with her ex. She's sworn off romance – she's even having a baby on her own. But before she knows it, the heat is on…and the attraction between her and Cal moves from a low simmer to a full boil! The rest should be easy as pie, but a secret from Cal's past could spoil everything. Maybe it's true that too many cooks spoil the broth – or maybe two is enough to make it irresistible. 24. Double Jeopardy Ellie Landau couldn't pass up the invitation to a murder mystery weekend. It was even harder to pass up fellow player Jed Thorpe. Only Jed was the "killer," and Ellie wound up fighting for her life. Back in the real world, Ellie was the management consultant for Cludds Haberdashers, a simple enough job until she realized that something was terribly wrong there - and that Jed was intimately involved. Then someone tried to kill her for real. Ellie was in double jeopardy. Was she falling in love with the one man who could save her life - or end it? 25. Dream Man Detective Dane Hollister of the Orlando police department has never met anyone quite like Marlie Keen. While he has doubts about her supposed clairvoyant powers, she sees crimes as they're being committed, there is no doubt about how much he desires her. To Marlie, Dane is all heat and hard muscle, and he makes her body come alive as it never has before. But not even she can foresee that their passion will lead them on a dangerous journey into the twisted mind of a madman who will threaten their happiness and their lives. 26. Exposed Beautiful, sophisticated, and engaged to the son of a Senator, Evie Masterson has the perfect life. Except for one thing: it's all based on a lie. Five years ago, she created a new identity for herself and cut all ties to her criminal past. But she can't run forever, because something she witnessed years ago comes back to haunt her. And the only person there to help is the man she thought she left behind forever-the one man she's never been able to forget. Devastatingly gorgeous and just as ruthless, Riley Everett is the criminal for hire who once stole Evie's heart. Years have gone by, but he's never been able to forget her either. Now her life is in jeopardy, and even after all this time, he'd still do anything to protect her, even if that means breaking into her mansion and stealing her away. As they hide from the world, their long-lost passion reignites. But despite their undeniable chemistry, Evie can't give up the perfect life she's been working toward... and Riley has no part in it. 27. Fancy Pants They're caviar and beer. Kerosene on fire. They're going to fall in love. She was the most beautiful British bauble in Europe's jet-set playgrounds. Now she's broke, furious, and limping down a backwoods road in an ugly pink Southern Belle gown... He was tall, lean and All-American gorgeous. He liked his brews cold and women loved to keep him warm. Why in hell is he stopping his car for this woebegone, surly Scarlett? 28. Find Me Investigative reporter Sarah Newton debunks supernatural myths, and forces the truth to light whether people want to hear it or not. Now, with a popular teenager found tortured and murdered – and another girl missing – Sarah's out to prove it's not the work of an ancient curse, but a cold-blooded killer. She'll expose one Maine village's darkest secrets …while keeping the truth about her own past hidden from view. As Youngstown's newest councilman, Kale Conner's unofficial job is to minimize the bad publicity from Sarah's stories and, if possible, to keep her in line. But with time running out, and his own family at stake, Kale's finding his neighbors' terrible deeds might be too deadly to sweep under the rug…and he and Sarah are headed toward a heated endgame with only one shocking way out... 29. Groomed for Murder Brooke Palmer's exclusive doggie spa, Pawlish, is sued when a client's pampered champion gets a bad poodle cut. The client's lawyer is drop-dead gorgeous Drew Hudson, but Brooke won't be wooed by a corporate shark in a sharp suit. This frivolous lawsuit is Drew's chance to advance to partner, but things get complicated when he finds that the side he's rooting for isn't the side he's fighting for. 30. Her Favorite Rival A new meaning for office politics: Audrey Mathews has worked hard to get here. Now she's up for a promotion and nothing will stand in her way – including Zach Black. He's hot, smart and the competition. When they're assigned to the same project, she's shocked at how much she actually likes about him…and how much she misjudged him. Before long Audrey is seriously falling for Zach – and indulging in an affair that's against company policy. And the stakes rise when it's clear only one of them can get ahead. So where do they draw the line between competition and love? Especially when she doesn't want to lose either the promotion or the guy…. 31. Hero Special Forces soldier, Haze Welch, is military born and raised. Serving the country is what the Welch men do, and all Haze has ever wanted. But during an 18-month tour overseas, his world shatters in an instant. Haze gets injured and is not able to return to active duty. Unable to face the thought of spending the rest of his life behind a desk, he accepts a job offer as a personal bodyguard in Los Angeles for the flighty heiress Leighton Machus. After all, one spoiled little girl would be a piece of cake compared to everything else I've been through, right? Little does Haze Welch know, he's about to get a rude awakening. 32. Hissy Fit The night before her wedding, in the middle of an oh-so-smart rehearsal dinner, interior decorator Keeley Murdock chances upon her fiancé and maid of honor in flaming flagrante delicto. Keeley throws the hissy fit to end all hissy fits and storms out. The next day, though, she has to deal not only personally with a broken engagement but also with her business being shut out by folks in a town financially obligated to her ex. Rescue comes in the form of the new owner of the local bra plant. This guy is a hunk but he's also a teensy bit weird, since he hires Keeley to redo the broken-down antebellum mansion he's bought for the woman of his dreams. The trouble is, he's never met said woman. So Keeley dives in and finds that true love can come even to those who throw humdinger hissy fits. 33. Hold Your Breath Lou's new to the Rockies, intent on escaping her oh-so-controlling ex, and she's determined to make it on her own terms...no matter how tempting new ice dive captain Callum Cook may be. But when a routine training exercise unearths a body, Lou and Callum find themselves thrust into a game of cat and mouse with a killer who'll stop at nothing to silence Lou—and prove that not even her faithful Search and Rescue brotherhood can keep her safe forever. Lou is a hurricane. A walking disaster. Perfect chaos in every way. And with her, Callum's never felt more alive...even if keeping her safe may just kill him. 34. Home to Seaview Key Falling for a handsome stranger on the very morning they meet is hardly what recently divorced Abby Miller planned for her return to Seaview Key. Hoping to mend an old friendship and to give back to the community she loves, Abby's definitely not looking for love. For ex-soldier Seth Landry, Seaview Key seems like the perfect place to heal a broken heart…eventually. And when he rescues a beautiful woman on the beach, his nightmares about the past are eclipsed by daydreams about the future. Neither Abby nor Seth are looking for forever, but powerful love has its own timetable. And taking a chance on the future will test their courage in ways neither of them could possibly have anticipated. 35. How the Cowboy Was Won Ember Alzate is a fantastic matchmaker with one big problem: she can't find the perfect mate for herself! Alzate family legend says that when she kisses "the One" she'll hear a mysterious humming in her head. Well, Ember's kissed a lot of guys and she's never heard a thing. Now, instead of searching for herself, she vows to find her best friend, Ranger Lockhart, a bride. It's clear this smart, sexy man just needs to meet the right gal. Ranger's returned home to Cupid with marriage on his mind, but he's not interested in the parade of women Ember pushes under his nose. His thoughts keep returning to his best friend -- with her combustible combination of curves and sass. No one compares to Ember, but what's it going to take to convince her she's the woman for him? 36. How to Date an Alien High school senior Alex Bianchi's estranged father gets her an internship at Circe Operations Center to pad her college applications. But Circe isn't your typical military base. It's an alien-run operation center and not all of the aliens are friendly, especially the one that tries to kill Alex on her first day. When Ace, a dark-eyed Caltian, enters and saves the day, she can't help but be drawn to him. Can these star-crossed lovers survive when they're on the brink of intergalactic war? 37. How to Kill Your Boss When Tatum's daydreams of murder become a reality, all fingers point to her. In Tatum Wood's opinion, murdering her boss on a daily basis within the safety of her thoughts is better than therapy. Until he takes a swan dive off a building and all evidence points to her. Thank goodness she has Franklin Reed. Her mysterious, overprotective and drop-dead gorgeous coworker is all too eager to play hero. With two attacks in her building and her stalker with a penchant for roses, Franklin's injection into her life couldn't have come at a better time. As Tatum and Franklin scramble to discover who's behind the murder, secrets are unearthed that question his motives…as well as his identity. 38. How to Marry a Marquis She’s trying to follow the rules… When Elizabeth Hotchkiss stumbles upon a copy of How to Marry a Marquis in her employer’s library, she’s convinced someone is playing a cruel joke. With three younger siblings to support, she knows she has to marry for money, but who might have guessed how desperate she’s become? A guidebook to seduction might be just the thing she needs—and what harm could there be in taking a little peek? …But he’s making his own. James Sidwell, the Marquis of Riverdale, has been summoned to rescue his aunt from a blackmailer, a task that requires him to pose as the new estate manager, and his primary suspect is his aunt’s companion, Elizabeth. Intrigued by the alluring young woman with the curious little rulebook, he gallantly offers to help her find a husband… by practicing her wiles on him. But when practice becomes all too perfect, James decides that there is only one rule worth following—that Elizabeth marry her marquis. 39. Howling in the Darkness Danger! Undercover agent Jonah Ries couldn't explain to the stunning woman who'd mistaken him for her blind date exactly how he knew someone was trying to harm her. But evil stalked Moriah's Landing, and Katherine Ridgemont was its target. When she learned of Jonah's deep secret, Kat might not give him the time of day. Only that wouldn't stop Jonah from watching over the vulnerable beauty after dark. As the anniversary of Kat's mother's mysterious death approached, the instinct to protect became a fire in Jonah's blood. A fire matched by his determination to save the woman he loved from the unknown forces that haunted the night... 40. In the Groove She wouldn't know a NASCAR star if he hit her with his car... and he just did. Sarah was a kindergarten teacher until a sleazy ex-boyfriend got her fired. Now the only job she can find is driving the motor coach for racing star Lance Cooper. She doesn't know a thing about NASCAR – and she's off to a rocky start when she doesn't recognize her ultra-famous boss. Lance can't help but notice Sarah's sweet smile – and how seriously unimpressed she is with his fame. Her reaction piques his interest – and he's convinced she's a good-luck charm. But Sarah has no interest in Lance's jet-setting life; she'd rather deal with spitballs than one super-sexy race car driver. Too bad whenever he comes near her she turns hot as race fuel. Soon things begin to heat up on the track, and Sarah begins to wonder if she might be able to teach one famous race car driver a few lessons about love 41. Into the Night Sheltered in the shadows of the Smoky Mountains is the suspect who's summoned FBI agent Macey Night's fears to the surface. Every day that the "Profiler," a vigilante serial killer, escapes justice is another day she's reminded of what it is to be a ruthless predator's prey. Capturing him is a craving deeper than anything she's felt in a long time. But Agent Bowen Murphy, equal parts sexy and volatile, seems hell-bent on changing that. Working together—needing, living and breathing each other—they're entwined to distraction. Bowen's used to operating on impulse: act, don't feel. Now Macey and the controlled terror behind her beautiful eyes have him rethinking everything, including his rule to never get close to a colleague. He's willing to fight for a future with Macey, but the consequences of love could be deadly. 42. Killjoy Her razor-sharp mind and ability to decipher evidence have made Avery Delaney an expert crime analyst for the FBI. Now she will have to use every one of her skills on a case that hits painfully close to home. Avery's beloved aunt Carolyn was on her way to a posh spa in the Colorado mountains. But she never arrived. Now, with scant clues and fewer resources, Avery must track down Carolyn -- and outmaneuver a brilliant killer named Monk who is part of an elaborate plot of madness and lethal vengeance. 43. Lawless Five years ago, Judd Dunn, a hard-edged Texas Ranger, put Christabel Gaines's father behind bars – where he belonged. But Judd's involvement in Crissy's life was far from over. With their jointly owned ranch on the verge of bankruptcy, Judd wed her in name only, vowing to save their land, and vowing to ignore the sexual tension between them. Now, just when Judd decides to release Crissy from their sham of a marriage, he is blindsided by a bloodthirsty foe who is setting the stage for unspeakable evil by preying upon Judd's greatest weakness – his wife. No longer a starry-eyed schoolgirl, Crissy's a smart, fearless woman with unfulfilled desires. And she will do anything in the name of love – including taking a bullet for her husband. With their very lives at stake, Crissy and Judd must confront their darkest demons, their new rivals and their deepest desires – and face up to a mutual destiny they cannot outrun. 44. Lone Star Santa Kristen Zaleski is home for the holidays... indefinitely. Her acting career hasn't taken off -- in fact, it hasn't gone anywhere. So now she's spending her days helping out at her dad's P.I. office. Until Mitch Donner comes by and lights up her life. Sort of... Mitch is back at his parents' place, too. As a successful accountant who'd been set up to take the fall in a money-laundering scheme, Mitch isn't quite sure what to do. So he takes a job installing Christmas lights... and gets an early present when he runs into Kristen. Especially when she offers her newly acquired P.I. skills to help him get his life back. Working together, they plot an elaborate sting operation, one that will take a miracle to pull off. Then again, anything is possible at Christmas -- especially if it involves mistletoe! 45. Long, Hot Texas Summer A sassy redhead with an axe to grind… After catching her husband kissing another woman in the barn, Loretta Sullivan Bailey left Lonesome Canyon Ranch and swore she'd never come back. But when her daughter threatens to drop out of college to become a rancher's wife, Loretta refuses to let her baby make the same mistake she did. She returns to the ranch, determined to get her daughter back in school by the summer's end…and resolute on ignoring her feelings for her ex-husband. A bullheaded but oh so sexy cowboy… A cowboy from his hat to his boots, ruggedly handsome rancher Jackson Bailey is none too pleased that his feisty -- and gorgeous -- ex-wife has suddenly shown up seventeen years after their divorce. But despite all their fighting and fussing, the two stubborn former lovers soon discover that old flames burn the hottest. Can they finally put aside their differences and find happiness together…forever? 46. Looking for Laura Sally Driver is a widow trying to move on with her life when she finds a stack of perfume-scented love letters from her late husband, Paul, had received from a mysterious woman named Laura. Todd Sloane was Paul's best friend and he feels betrayed that his friend would keep such a secret from him. Together Sally and Todd go looking for Laura, but with luck on their side, they may just find something more meaningful along the way... 47. Making Him Sweat Round 1: In this corner is admittedly romantic Jenna Wilinski, who's inherited a rather seedy boxing gym from her estranged father. With it, she can realize her dream of launching an upscale matchmaking business…provided she can take on the very intimidating – and wickedly hot – boxer who stands in her way! Round 2: In the far corner is former pro boxer Mercer Rowley. He's the only one who can protect his "home" – even if it is a little run-down – from his determined and feisty little opponent. But man, once the gloves come off, his hands just want to touch her everywhere… Round 3: This matchup is too close to call. But no matter which contender comes out on top, the other is sure to enjoy every minute of it…. 48. Marry Me at Christmas To bridal boutique owner Madeline Krug, organizing a Christmas wedding sounds like a joy - until she finds out she'll be working closely with the gorgeous brother of the bride, movie star Jonny Blaze. How will a small-town girl like her keep from falling for the world's sexiest guy? Especially with mistletoe lurking around every corner! Jonny came to Fool's Gold looking for normal, not for love. Happily-ever-after only happens in the movies. Still, nothing about this quirky town is quite what he expected, and "ordinary" Madeline is the most extraordinary woman he's ever met. Refreshingly honest, disarmingly sweet. Achingly beautiful. Planning the perfect wedding leads to candlelit dinners and strolls through snow-covered streets. And Madeline finds Jonny in real life even more captivating than her celebrity crush. But will the action star be brave enough to risk his heart and step into the role of a lifetime? 49. Mischief Imogen Waterstone needed a man, and not just any man: one with an implacable will and nerves of iron. That's why she invited Matthias Marshall, the Earl of Colchester, to her home. For who better than the legendary explorer to help her lure a ruthless enemy to ruin. Yet when Imogen urges Matthias to masquerade as her spellbound suitor -- and let it be known that she possesses a priceless treasure map -- she never anticipates his electrifying response -- or her own. Suddenly, the unconventional lady is in the thrall of true passion... and vulnerable to a malevolent threat that emerges from the labyrinth of London society. 50. My Front Page Scandal Brooke Winfield is the devoted and dependable daughter of one of Boston's oldest families. So what is she doing on the back of a motorcycle in the middle of the night with sexy bad-boy ballplayer David Carrera? Elated by that recklessness, Brooke decides she's ready to take a Martini dare--and what a dare! Her performance at a posh strip club lands her back in David's arms for another unforgettable night... and in the tabloids the next morning.

[painandpleasure86]

My new neighbor it's my crush (Deazzello week 2020)

Author's note: Hi people! I'm participating of this ship week hosted by @roger-taylors-car ❤️ I took the prompt "Neighbors" and kinda the one "First time" from day 2. First fic of this ship that I post! (I have a drabble from Christmas that I never posted lol)

Summary: the Mazzellos are now neighbors of the Deacon. The life of some of them it's about to change.

Warning: none. Just Joey and John being cute.

Word count: +1.6k

Permanent taglist: @warriorteam1924 @toomuchlove-willkillyou (sorry if you aren't comfortable with this ship! You can ignore this fic without problems). If anyone wants to be in my permanent taglist, send me an ask or msg! Warning: I haven't a fic posting schedule :/ lol

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Next to John's house, will have some new neighbors soon. They're a family from USA. The man and his wife were planning to open a dance studio in UK, after the success of their ones in USA. They thought that Europe would be a great new horizon to explore. With the couple came one of their offspring, the young Joseph. He was just 21 years old and he helped to their parents in the studio, also he was trying to have an acting career. He had straight red hair, green eyes and a wide smile in his face. He wasn't so tall, but he was thin.  He could be the funniest one but also the most serious man when it's necessary.

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Was a strangely sunny Saturday in the south of London when the move truck came near to his house. Just for mere curiosity, was to see through his porch. Meanwhile he was smoking a cigarette, with the another hand in his pocket and watching all, came mister Joseph to greet him.

"Oh hello sir. I'm Joseph and we came with our family to live for a while in London" he greeted him, extending his left hand through the railings.

"I'm John. Nice to meet you sir" replied him shaking hands.

After a couple of minutes where the men were talking, the young Joseph came there and he exclaimed so happy "HI MISTER IM JOE!"

His happiness was contagious for John, he smiled, even laughed a little. Joseph was upset.

"Hi Joe, I'm John", he responded with a wide smile.

After that, recognized who were him. That eye crackling was special. That soothing voice too.

"DAD YOU KNOW WHO IS HE?!?! HE'S A ROCK STAR!"

John laughed, half being nice and half uncomfortable.

His father saw to his son pretty upset.

"Joseph, I know who is him! Now, go and help to the movers. Surely will have opportunity to you to chat with him… of course if he wants" ended watching to the bassist.

"Of course, one day you and your family can come for tea time!" he said kindly.

Ronnie was watching the scene and decided to approach to it.

She exclaimed "oh, you're the new neighbors. I'm Veronica, but you can call me Ronnie".

Joseph shaked hand with the mistress just smiling politely. When was Joe's turn, he said "nice to meet you Ronnie. I'm Joe! Oh, lemme tell ya, you're pretty!"

Ronnie blushed a little for the unexpected compliment.

Ending the hand shake, she added "you're so sweet Joe!" Watching to John, she said "we should invite to this men and the rest of their family one day!". Her husband nodded and she, watching to the another men, told "tomorrow at 5 o'clock suits fine to you?"

The American men nodded, Joe pretty excitedly. He loved to meet new people, and more if it's one of his music idols. 

When the Mazzello men came back to the move, Joe exclaimed "Dad why you didn't told me that we would be deaky's neighbors?!"

Joseph watched to his son very serious.

"Joe, really you ask that? You acted like a fan! That man it's also a person, he deserves more respect!"

Joe stayed in silence.

His father continued talking.

"Tomorrow, behave please. Act like an adult."

"If act like an adult it's always being boring, I prefer to be a teen forever!" said Joe pissed.

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After a long day, Joe could rest in his room. He puts his old Queen posters and one of John closer to his bed. He wanted to be in that tea thing, but more for the man that will be the host. That 40-ish old man, with white-ish hair and simple clothes still make things to him. Perhaps more than when he discovered that pics with the white jumpsuit. That pics with the I want to break free video and song were his sexual awake. He recognized that he wasn't a straight boy. 

"I really want to hug him at least… feel that arms around me would make me happy" he thought , watching to the roof. A deep sigh escaped of him. A wide smile in his face.

Imagining romantic scenarios with that man made him sleep deeply, despite the remaining jet lag. 

John was trying to sleep and that redhead boy came to his mind. "Deaks, not that again… you love your family. Indeed you have a son that's near to the age of that guy. Don't be impulsive. What would happen if that guy it's straight or he just was nice? Try to sleep please" he was thinking. He was having an internal debate and that was noticeable to the outside. Ronnie noticed that.

"John, are you okay?"

He couldn't be fully sincere, so he lied partially.

"I think that was pretty impulsive to let to that people come to our house… Isn't my style"

She watched to him "relax John, was so nice from you. Plus they look like a kind people".

John, trying to be funny, said "oh that's why the guy told a compliment to you, when you looks like a living disaster…" and smiled.

Ronnie didn't liked that joke and when she was about to respond, Cameron started to cry in the next room.

"Cam saved you this time John".

And he was alone with his own thoughts. 

"Better of that way…" he thought meanwhile his wife was to lull to their baby.

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Sunday Afternoon came and no one was lazing. Ronnie and John, meanwhile preparing the things for the tea time and care of their youngest children. Elder ones, were pissed for the visit. Except Laura. "A boy in the house that aren't my brothers, I hope that he looks cute" thought smiling the girl, meanwhile she was doing her outfit.

Her mom saw her and told to the girl "Laura, the guy haves like 20 years and you're only 14…"

"Don't care mum. Perhaps in some years we can be together…"

"Laura, you didn't saw him and you're already planning that kind of things… real life isn't like the movies"

"I SAID DON'T CARE MUM! LET ME BE HAPPY. YOU BETTER GO AND TAKE CARE OF LUKE AND CAM!" screamed the girl, really pissed.

"Behave Laura. You can't talk to me like that! One more of that and you will not have your new walkman to your next birthday!" and the woman was downstairs.

The little girl didn't suspected that also her father was interested in that guy. That chance never passed for her mind. Like her mom said, real life isn't like the movies shows. And was about to witness that, without knowing.

The Mazzellos were preparing their outfits. Joe one was a beautiful black shirt, denim jeans, white sneakers and wearing his favorite parfum. His mother saw him and told "Joey, why that parfum? That one it's for special occasions" 

"Mom, we will have tea time with him, that isn't enough reason?"

His mom smiled.

"Haha, I forgot how much you love that band and that man… as a musician of course. I hope you don't misunderstood me!" and leave to her son alone.

Meanwhile, he was putting in practice his acting lessons to rehearsal how to say his feelings to that man. His mirror was the witness. And he forgot the door slightly open...

His dad caught him saying "I really love you since a lot of time…" to the mirror and he hawked to make notorious his presence.

"Joe, practice your script for the audition in the night, now it's time for the tea with the neighbors".

"Yeah, script… was the script of my own life that I was practicing" thought the boy.

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The moment came. The tea time was there. 

Both families around the table of the living room, starting to have a nice time. Robert, Michael and Joshua were pretty upset. Laura was happy. "That guy looks so beautiful. It's so cute!" she thought meanwhile she greeted him. Same thing was thinking her dad…

In some moment of the tea time, Joe asked for the bathroom. Ronnie pointed the guest bathroom. Moments later, John get up of the couch with the excuse to bring more muffins.

Meanwhile Joe was going to the living, saw John in the kitchen. "It's now or never Joey" thought.

The redhead was in John's direction. 

"Mister… can I ask you something?"

Leaving the tray with muffins, John said "go ahead man" and smiled. That sweet smile that Joe always loved.

Joe blushed a little.

"Can I hug you?"

John was surprised for that question. But also kinda happy.

"Of course" and he extended his arms.

Both hugged. Joe embraced to the old man tight.

And remembering his acting classes to cover his fear, he whispered something to the ear of the man. "I like you. But not like a musician. Thank you for I want to break free, because I knew what really I want… a man like you".

John had his answer. And responded, kinda nervous, in Joe's ear "you're a cute boy. I wanna know you more".

They left the embrace and watched to the another one smiling. When Joey was about to give a kiss in the cheek of John, Laura came to the kitchen.

"What the fuck?!"

"I was about to hug your dad! He's my idol, y'know" Joe replied, winking an eye to the girl.

"Oh sorry!" she exclaimed, blushing a little. And watching now to her dad, she continued "Mum sent to me because you were delaying a lot, dad!".

The men had another hug, but this one was less tighter.

The three were going to the living. Laura in front of them. John watched mischievously to Joe for a moment and made that smirk. 

The three already in the living again. The men pretending like nothing unusual happened. But both of them knew that their lives changed since that moment. And they were prepared to live something that they really wanted…

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Guys, I hope that you like this!!! Reblogs are highly appreciated!!!

-Lily

[rogerina-deacon]

Just Give Me A Reason // Joe Mazzello x Fem!Reader

Pairing: Joe Mazzello x Reader Summary: Nightmares surrounding yours and Joe’s relationship have been haunting your dreams, and Joe’s sleep talking sent you over the emotional edge one particular night, driving you two to talk about your relationship. Warnings: Angst (there’s a happy ending I promise), drinking with allusions to it being a problem for the reader, fluff Word Count: 1380

(Gif via Pinterest)

A/N: This is for my lovely friend Laura’s (@littledarlingwellaway) birthday/1k celebration, and I hope you all like it!! It’s based on the song Just Give Me A Reason by P!nk ft. Nate Ruess. Also, just a reminder that feedback is heavily encouraged, no matter how small and simple it is!

Another night, another nightmare that you were all to happy to have just been a dream that finished as soon as you opened your eyes to reveal the dark view from your side of the bed. But soon enough, you were being reminded of what the nightmare was about by your boyfriend Joe, who lay asleep beside you, muttering something.

“No, no, I can’t do this anymore… I don’t love you, just go away…” He said, and your heart broke as you heard it. Your nightmares were the same as his, it seemed, and you couldn’t help but believe it meant something.

Tears welled as your eyes stung and throat began to ache as you willed yourself to get out of bed and slowly make your way to the kitchen down the hall, which was a trip filled with thinking too much and emotional daggers plunging into your heart as each and every negative thought flooded into your mind, wondering when he started feeling this way, if he had always felt like that, what you had done to warrant those nightmares combined with waking up to that. Reaching the kitchen, you poured yourself a glass of water, a quiet sob finally escaping your throat as the faucet turned on and you figured the sound of water rushing out into the glass would cover any sound you made. You had half contemplated pouring yourself a shot or two to numb everything, but you knew deep down that was a terrible coping mechanism, that it would just lead to you lashing out on him and breaking down emotionally, so you tried your best to stay away from the liquor cabinet, though there didn’t seem to be a seat at the table that fit that description. If you sat with it behind you, you’d surely just turn around and grab what you wanted. If you sat opposite the cabinet, it’d be like you were in a staring contest with it, its knobs tempting you more and more with every minute that passes by, almost teasing you.

“What are you doing up, babe?” You heard Joe ask from the archway, his voice sleepy as he tried to read your emotions in the dim room. Getting closer, he turned on the ceiling light, the brightness hurting both of you, and you two began rubbing your eyes as they failed to adjust.

“Couldn’t sleep.” You lied, your voice betraying you with a crack.

“Bullshit.” Joe countered, knowing all too well when you were upset, although it’s not like it was hard to tell. Your eyes were puffy, red, and seemingly lifeless, tear stains running down your cheek, a frown present on your lips.

“What’s going on, babe? I know you’ve been having bad dreams lately, and I want to help you get through them.” He said, his arm beginning to wrap around your shoulders, but you abruptly stood up from your seat and walked away from the table, not wanting to be touched by the man you thought loved you but was subconsciously saying otherwise.

“I doubt you can help them when they seem to be what you want.” You scoffed, and he looked at you dumbfounded, his dream from a few minutes ago already lost in his memory.

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” He scoffed right back, standing as he became more defensive of his emotions and role in the relationship.

“It means, you talk in your sleep, and just over five minutes ago you were saying something about not loving me anymore!” You exclaimed, hoping he’d finally get why you felt this way.

Just as you said that, his dream came back to him in small pieces and he vaguely remembered yelling at his ex girlfriend, who had, in his dream, came back, and his world was as if no one knew who you were, as if everything was how it was five years ago, and he was the only one who knew who you were.

“Oh shit, baby no, just let me explain the dream and I can assure you, it has nothing to do with me not loving you, it’s the opposite actually-” He started rambling, but remembering his dream left his vision blank and when he came back to reality, he saw you opening the liquor cabinet, the same one you tried to avoid earlier but now your emotions had gotten the better of you and decided you needed something to help, though it really wouldn’t.

“You’re pouring a drink? Really?” He accused, interrupting himself, watching as you emptied a bit of the bottle into the small shot glass.

“Well, at least I’m not holding it in!” You fired back before downing the sharp liquid, and Joe immediately rushed over and put away the bottle, throwing the shot glass into the sink, causing it to shatter on impact.

“I’m not holding anything in, okay, it isn’t as bad as it seems-” He started again, but you interrupted him.

“Then tell me. Give me a reason to stay when you don’t want me here.” You said, crossing your arms in front of you.

“What you heard me mumbling in my sleep? I was saying that to my ex in my dream, but really I’d call it a nightmare. I was in some alternate universe where you and I weren’t together, and I was still with her, but I knew who you were. I knew I loved you and that I didn’t want to be with her. Everyone was acting as if you just didn’t exist and I was so frustrated, all I wanted was to be with you, because I love you. I have always loved you, and I will always love you.” He concluded, and now you were close to crying again, but for the first time in days, it’s out of happiness.

“Oh fuck.” You said in disbelief, arms dropping to your side.

“Yeah.” He said, not sure of what else he should say.

“I’m sorry, Joe, I just…” You trailed off, unsure of what excuse to give, but luckily he nodded before he finally said something.

“I know, and honestly, I’m sure if I heard you saying the same shit in your sleep I’d get just as insecure. But I think we might have another problem to work through.” He confessed, and you dreaded the words you knew you’d hear in just a moment.

“You know drinking your problems away isn’t a good coping skill in the slightest, baby, I know you do.” He started, wrapping an arm around your shoulder, kissing the top of your head as you nodded meekly.

“I know, but it’s the easiest.” You confessed, and now it was his turn to nod in agreement as he led you both back to the bedroom.

“Yeah, but maybe we could, uh, work on finding something else that helps?” he suggested, and you nodded once again.

“Maybe, but I don’t think we’re really at the point where it’s a big problem yet.” You reasoned, not ready at all to quit.

“That may be, but I can see it becoming one. And I don’t want you to go through that. I’d stick with you through it, I can assure you that, but I know it’s hard. And if you could cut down before it gets bad, I’d be really proud of you.” He told you as you both climbed into bed, his arms wrapping around you once you laid down, cuddling into his side for the first night in a while.

“I’ll try, babe, but you’ll probably have to remind me.” You admitted, too tired to put up a fight. Between the lack of sleep and fighting, you were truly worn out, and wanted nothing more than to just fall asleep for what would hopefully be a peaceful night.

“Oh I will, this is important to me baby. But don’t worry about that right now, just get some sleep.” He assured, kissing the top of your head as he adjusted slightly, one of your arms lightly resting over his stomach as the other was bent at your side, slightly touching Joe’s side.

“G’night, Joe.” You mumbled as you slowly drifted off, eyelids becoming heavier and heavier as your breathing steadied, Joe’s familiar scent soothing you to sleep.

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[areiton]

coming home

Square: K5 Presumed Dead 

Summary: “They want to plan the funeral,” he says, after a while, and Harley smiles.

It’s not a happy smile. It’s the kind of smile he learned from Tony, the kind that is all sharp teeth and threat and it makes Peter shiver.

“Tony left plans for that,” he says. “Let them have their spectacle.”

 For @tonystarkbingo

AO3 Link (2.6k): https://archiveofourown.org/works/18130361

~*~ 

There’s a number in his phone he’s never called.

A number that has never called him.

He watches the TV, watches the news, and he doesn’t believe it, can’t believe it.

But he reaches for his phone and pulls it up.

“Peter,” the other voice says, his voice thick and choked.

He wants to hate him, for that. And can’t. Can’t, because he loved Tony before Peter knew him, can’t because Tony loved him.

“Harley,” he says, and his voice doesn’t sound like him. Sounds distant and strange and empty. “You should probably come over.”

“I’m already on my way.”

~*~

Harley came first, is the thing. This sassy snarky brilliant boy that Tony adored.

Peter hated him, the first time they met, hated the way they fell into each other’s orbit, the way Tony smiled at Harley with guilt free eyes, the way they laughed about things Peter didn’t know about.

Harley didn’t like him either, but he never bothered to explain it.

Then the War happened and Titan happened and he came back and Harley did, and Harley mattered, mattered in ways that Peter still didn’t like.

But he was the one in Tony’s bed, and in his labs, and the one at his side at gala’s and press conferences and on the team.

Harley was brought into SI--he’s brilliant, Pete, he’s gonna be even better than Pepper when he grows into it--and Peter didn’t like it, but they’d all lost too much for him to fight it.

Tony deserved all the family he could find.

They could hate each other, and fake it, for the man they both loved.

~*~

Harley walks in the way he always has--like he belongs here. Even if the penthouse is Peter’s and Tony’s--he always acted liked it was his home too.

Maybe because Tony always treated him like the son he didn’t have.

Maybe the reason Peter has never liked him.

He walks in and takes a look at Peter, curled on the couch in Tony’s favorite sweatshirt and a big blanket, and eyes glassy. “You,” he says, “need a drink.”

~*~

Harley pours him shitty vodka on ice because he can’t handle tequila--it’s the last thing he drank with Tony, the night before he left, mango margaritas that were tangy and sweet on his tongue and he could taste the bite of tequila on Tony’s mouth, after, when he rode him slow and easy in their big bed.

He drinks his vodka and watches the news, watches it scroll along the bottom, tears dripping slow down his cheeks and vodka cold in his belly.

He wonders if he’ll ever be warm, or if this is how life will be now.

“It’s not true,” he says, hours or minutes or days later.

Harley is close by, close enough that he feels the words brush against his skin, when he hears them, soft whispered, “I know it’s not.”

~*~

True or not--the news is there, and the wreckage, and the world has been through too much--SI has been--to not address it.

“We have to call a press conference,” Harley says, when dawn starts creeping over the horizon.

The vodka is almost gone, and his head is pleasantly fuzzy, but the grief looms hot and large and crushing.

“Peter,” he says, sharply and Peter shrugs. Curls into his blankets.

“I don’t care, Harley. It’s not true.”

Harley crouches in front of him, green eyes hard and determined and red-rimmed. “We have to take care of SI, Peter. Until he comes home, we have to.”

“He’s coming home,” Peter says, and Harley s eyes glint with tears, his mouth trembles, and it hits Peter suddenly--Harley is taking care of him, but he’s breaking too. This is just as hard for him, if for different reasons.

And as much as Peter dislikes Harley, as much as he doesn’t want to take care of him--

He sits up, let’s Harley pull him to his feet. “What do you need me to do?” he asks, his voice raspy and eyes burning.

~*~

They hold a press conference.

It’s as horrible as Peter expects, and after, he turns off their phones and orders FRIDAY to leave them undisturbed and lets Harley get very, very drunk.

“They want to plan the funeral,” he says, after a while, and Harley smiles.

It’s not a happy smile. It’s the kind of smile he learned from Tony, the kind that is all sharp teeth and threat and it makes Peter shiver.

“Tony left plans for that,” he says. “Let them have their spectacle.”

Peter shivers and Harley sighs, sitting next to him, and draping himself behind the younger man. It feels strange to have someone besides Tony wrapped around him, but it feels right, too--because no one in the world loved Tony the way did, no one understood them and the strange found family the way they could. Rhodey would try, if he were here instead of combing the south Pacific, but he was different, was closer to an equal.

Harley and Peter--they weren’t. They were kids that captivated Tony, and most days, Peter still didn’t know why.

“Did I tell you about the time Tony came to came to my science fair?” Harley murmurs, and Peter smiles.

~*~

It's hell. And as the word spreads, as people gather for the funeral, it gets, impossibly, worse.

The first time, Tony was missing for three months before he rose from the dead.

The second, it was six.

Peter hopes like hell it's less than that, this time.

~*~

After the funeral, he expects Harley to go home.

He has a life, a pretty wife and a dog, a corporation to run and he tolerates Peter at best.

But he doesn’t. He makes some calls, and Laura comes to the tower, settles into Harley's room, and it's...strange.

But not bad.

Once he looks at Harley, a night he doesn't get drunk, and asks, “Why are you still here?”

Harley shrugs. “We're family, Parker. He made us family. And family does this kind of shit together.”

~*~

A month after the Stark jet crashed into the south Pacific with Tony Stark and CEO Pepper Potts, the board meets to read the will.

Peter is there. So is Harley. They’re indisputably the future of SI, the heirs Tony had selected and both he and Pepper had groomed, and it had always seemed amusing and also like a distant nightmare, something he knew he’d have to deal with one day—but not now. Not any time soon.

He knew loving Tony, being with him, meant he’d lose Tony long before he was ready. It was a worry that loomed for the older man, and once, when Peter proposed, he’d said something about it.

He’d never let himself care.

He’d always looked at Tony and seen something eternal. Something that couldn’t die.

But it’s been a month and even Rhodey called. He got drunk, blackout drunk and sobbed himself to sleep in his big empty bed, and woke up held to Harley’s chest.

He can’t come back from this, kid. There’s nothing—there’s nothing to come back from.

“He’s coming home,” Peter whispered into Harley’s shirt, a childlike belief wearing thin, and Harley nodded against his hair, stubble tugging just a little.

Rhodey kept looking, and they—they kept doing what they had to.

And if he felt like he was drowning, well. Harley and Laura held him up during the worst of it.

But he stands next to Harley in the elevator, and he sees the other man’s hands tremble and he says, “You’re doing great.”

He says, “He would be so proud of you, Harls.”

He says, “I’m glad it’s you.”

Harley gives him a weak, watery smile, and he squeezes Peter’s shoulder once as the elevator slows. “He’s coming home.”

It feels like a call and refrain, like a chant that if they pray often enough, it might be true. Peter nods, and something tight and broken in Harley’s eyes eases, just a little, before he steps off the elevator.

~*~

They’re named his heirs. Oh, there is the money set aside for the September Foundation, for the Avengers and their mission, for the arts that Pepper loved so much—but that is a pittance, in the grand scheme of things. Peter and Harley are named the sole benefactors, with controlling interest of SI and all the rights and responsibilities that come with it. There’s more—the houses and cars and patents and so much more that Peter’s head spins with it—but it comes down to this: Tony Stark gave everything to him. A poor boy from Queens. And Harley. A poor boy from Tennessee.

After.

After—they go back to the penthouse, and Peter sits on the counter, his wrists itchy for the pressure of his webslingers and skin crawling with the urge to fly through the air.

“He left the suits to you,” Harley murmurs.

Peter looks at him.

Even now, all these years later, Spiderman remains a mystery, a well kept secret. But Harley isn’t the public or even the SI board. He’s one of Tony’s, someone the man loved, trusted. And he’s watching Peter, eyes patient and curious.

“Come on,” he says. “Lemme show you.”

~*~

“I hated you,” Harley says. It’s one of the days that are bad, one of the days Peter wakes up and can’t breathe through the crushing grief, can’t see through his tears. One of the days he curls in Tony’s old tshirt and hides from the world that wants so much from him, the world that would eat him whole.

It’s one of Harley’s bad days too, when he goes quiet and brooding, when he is withdrawn and reclusive, and Peter aches for him to reach out and comfort.

They don’t usually have bad days together.

Usually it works that Peter can grieve and Harley can coax him out of the worst of it, and Peter can do the same to Harley. On days like this, though—the grief is so pervasive and thick and isolating, he wonders if he’ll ever be free of it.

“I know,” Peter says.

“I saw you at his side on the TV and I felt like I’d been forgotten, left behind like when my Dad left us. I hated you for that.”

“I hated you,” Peter says, and Harley nods.

He fingers the suit that’s tossed on the end of Tony and Peter’s bed, the one he’d been unsurprised but quietly pleased to see. “I’m glad he had you. I can’t—this isn’t something I could share with him. I’m glad you could.”

Peter stares at him, and grasps for his hand.

~*~

Some days, he looks out the windows of the penthouse, searches the sky for a suit he doesn’t see and he thinks—maybe they were all right.

Maybe they won’t see Ironman in the skies over New York again.

Maybe—

“He’s coming home,” Harley says, softly and firmly and Peter swallows, convulsively, turns to curl in Harley’s comforting embrace.

It’s been five months.

“I know,” he whispers, and it tastes like a lie.

~*~

“I’m coming back,” Rhodey says. It’s been six months and Peter wants to hate him for that—but he can’t.

It’s been six months and the wreckage is gone, and Tony is gone.

Sometimes—sometimes Peter wonders if this is how Tony had felt, when Peter died, if the desperate clawing grief is what made him fight so hard to survive and even harder to undo everything Thanos had done.

He wishes he had asked.

~*~

Laura finds the recipe book. She digs it out and drags Peter and Harley into the kitchen, and they spend a messy night cooking chicken gnocchi and drinking cheap white wine and Peter laughs.

It hurts, later, when he’s in bed and Harley creeps in, curls around him and holds him, grounding as he sobs.

“It’s not fair,” he gasps. What right does he have to laugh, when Tony is dead? To be happy when the whole reason he exists is gone.

“None of this is fair,” Harley says.

~*~

Laura shyly announces that she’s pregnant the night they try to recreate eggplant Parmesan, and Harley stares at her, slack jawed and Peter smiles and it hurts, but he thinks—this is what Tony would have wanted.

He would have been so happy, so fucking proud of Harley.

He should be here.

~*~

Eight months tick by and Peter holds on to the words, the quiet promise.

He’s coming home.

“Do you still believe it?” he asks Harley one night while they’re going over more endless paperwork that seems to keep SI running.

Harley glances at him. “When I met Tony, he was dragging a defunct suit and had been declared dead and managed to survive attacks from genetically manipulated people who were on fire.”

Peter stares at him and Harley smiles gently. “I think it will take a helluva a lot more than a plane crash to keep Tony Stark from coming back to you, Peter.”

Peter looks away, tears burning in his eyes.

“He’d never miss the birth of your baby,” he whispers and Harley grins.

They sign a few more papers, and then, “Hey.”

Peter looks up, and Harley says, softly, a secret prayer. “He’s coming home.”

Peter nods. “He’s coming home.”

~*~

They make meatloaf on a quiet Thursday. Laura is sleeping on the couch and Harley is laughing at Peter’s story about the lab when a voice cuts through the room.

“If I’d known dying would get you two to get along, I’d have done it years ago.”

Peter drops the glass he’s holding.

Harley is grinning, his eyes shinning, staring past Peter like he’s seen a miracle.

Tony looks—he looks like hell, sunburnt and beat to hell and Pepper is clinging to him, red and too thin and shaking, and there’s a smile on her split chapped lips, and they’re—

They’re here.

They’re alive.

Pepper nudges Tony and it breaks the moment, and Peter throws himself into Tony’s open arms.

His arms come around him, tight enough Peter can’t breathe, and it’s ok, it’s perfect, it’s perfect.

Tony is home.

Tony is alive and here and Harley is laughing, disbelief and relief in his voice.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” Tony murmurs, and Peter draws back to kiss him, silencing the apology before it can turn into anything more. It’s gentle, mindful of Tony’s raw skin, fingers flitting anxious and eager over his jaw and down his sides, and Tony groans into it, drags him close and licks into his mouth.

It’s perfect. Dry and gritty with salt and sand and perfect.

He pulls back abruptly, remembering and almost shoves Tony at Harley.

“You look good, Pops,” Harley says, accepting the too tight, desperate hug, clinging back just as hard.

“You look like you moved in, Junior.”

“Someone needed to look after your boy toy,” Harley says, lightly.

There are questions. There’s a story here, and a mountain of paperwork to deal with, a media circus that is already giving Peter a headache, a thousands things that will need to be done. But that’s tomorrow. For now.

“Rhodey is bringing Bruce and Dr. Cho,” Peter says, and Harley nods, eyeing Tony and Pepper.

“FRIDAY, order—” he pauses, and glances at Tony, questioningly.

“A burger,” Pepper says, firmly and it strings a smile across Tony’s lips.

“Burgers,” Harley finishes, smiling, and Peter let’s go of the worries as Tony tugs him onto his lap, curling together on the couch.

There are a million things to think about, later, later, tomorrow.

For now, there is this. A boy who has somehow become his best friend, and the man he loves more than life, both exactly where they belong, and Peter tucked against Tony.

He catches Harley’s eyes and mouths the words.  He came home.

[olympivnshq]

congratulations laura !  MEGARA is a figure who beyond disney, has not been given much of a voice, nor appreciation. you gave her a real story, something to work towards, her unique way of thinking. your attention to detail in your app was incredible and adheres deeply to your character in a way that invigorates us for our own, so we’re pleased to welcome you with your first faceclaim choice: BENEDETTA GARGARI

☆ﾟ*・ﾟ  OOC INFO.

Hi I’m Laura, I’m 22 and live in GMT+10 timezone (Australia). Honestly there isn’t much more to tell.

☆ﾟ*・ﾟ  DEITY  —  GENDER. AGE RANGE.

Megara, Female, 20-25

☆ﾟ*・ﾟ MORTAL NAME. JOB/OCCUPATION. BOROUGH/NEIGHBORHOOD.

Megan Jones, Waitress (Former Student), Greenwich Village, Manhattan

☆ﾟ*・ HOW WOULD YOU PLAY THEM?

The climax of Megara’s life, the moment that forced her to face who she was, and who she had been, was the day she arrived in Hades. Everyone in Hades has a bag, a bag filled to the brim with words. Words you have said, words you have heard, words other people have said about you. Megara’s bag contained very little of herself, most of its contents concerned her husband – Heracles.

It was to such an extent that she wondered if she had existed before her husband.

More shocking than the contents of her own bag, her own life, was the thought of what her husbands would contain once he joined her… If he joined her. Would she be more than a footnote in his tale?

Who was Megara? Often even she does not know. She gave up everything, her identity, her independence, her choices, to ensure that she did right by the people she loved. The father who needed her, the husband she always wished needed her more, and the children she would inevitably fail.

The earlier you die the longer you have to reflect in Hades, to consider your choices, and your mistakes. To reflect on all of the potential that was stripped away.

Megara had never been good at looking back, she didn’t like to regret, and she certainly didn’t like to dwell on the things she could not change. Looking forwards, however, was her specialty, she knew how to dream, how to plan. She knew how to weigh the choices, and the possibilities, how to craft a path that would lead to the greatest outcome for all. It was why she sacrificed, and it was how she realised, in Hades, just how much she would have done, had she been given the choice.

Perhaps that was what she was. Wasted potential.  A thousand lifetimes unlived.

For Megan everything was different – and yet everything was very much the same. Some may say she grew up with a very different father to Creon. He certainly was not a wealthy King, yet when he was winning big, he acted like one. He was a man who indulged in all the opulence that he could not afford. For Megan he played the same role.  

Megan’s childhood was one of extremes. Her father gambled and gambled often with little regard for the consequences. One day he would win big, would be high on the grand scheme he had planned, a scheme that would set the family up for life, and make up for every mistake her father had made in the past. These times Megan would be showered in gifts, expensive toys, new furniture, and trips to all of her favourite places. Her father treated her like a princess, and her mother like a Queen.

Within a few weeks, however, the men her father had borrowed from would arrive. Stripping everything they had gained, and then some, to ensure her father paid his debts. From there the spiral would be unbearable, until, of course, her father won and the cycle started all over again.

During this time Megan lost herself in stories. Books were one of the few things unlikely to be taken from her, and she cherished them. She chose to live in the dreams her books provided, to protect herself from the reality that waited outside.

Megan became the opposite of her father in every way. Where he spent, she saved. Where he was selfish, she became sacrificing, where he was ruled by indulgence she was led, at all times, by her duty.

It was hard to keep any money or wealth from her father, but as a teenager she managed it, putting money away, little by little, in places he could not access it. A teacher who opened a secret bank account in her name and a hole in her wall where she hid the profits from the gifts she had sold, before the all too familiar loan sharks could do the same.

It was all towards one goal. To leave her hometown for a big city, the biggest city, where she could disappear amongst a mass of people to whom she owed nothing. New York University provided every opportunity she craved.

For a while everything was perfect. She had independence for the first time in her life. Her father knew she was studying at NYU but knew nothing more about her location. She was free to live her life however she saw fit.

She worked part time as a waitress, socialising with other like-minded students and losing herself in her English Literature studies.

She was stupid to think it would last.

It was on the last day of her exams that the men turned up at her door. She did not know them, had never met them before, but she knew the look of them. In a moment everything she had built was torn away from her.

Her choice was simple, give up everything she had to work of her father’s debt, or let her father suffer. It was never really a choice.

Now Megan works full time waitressing, most of the money she earns goes back to the thugs her father owes his life to. It’s never enough, it never will be enough, Megan now watches as every dream she had disappears into dust.

answer these questions:

would you like your character to be entering the roleplay at this stage in the plot, with or without their memories?

I would prefer she enters without her memories, as I think the realisation of who she is, and her place in the universe, will be fun to play with from the beginning.

are they more likely to stand with the pantheon or against it?  ( if you are choosing a god they may endeavour to dismantle it for whatever reason )

Megan would snort at this question. What would it matter?  She would think, behind her silent sneer. What good would my choice provide to either side?

It would be a hard choice. Duty rules her, duty to those she is affiliated. Now, however, Megan has led a whole life without the pantheon, a whole life in which she felt no loyalty to any of the people asking for her help. Who are the Gods to her? Why should she stand with them, when they would not stand with her if their roles were reversed?

Of course, all of this is just talk, a feeble attempt to regain agency after all she had lost. Megan can pretend all she wants that the pantheon is meaningless to her. Megan stands by her own, even if doing so means giving up everything she has ever wanted. In the end she will stand with the closest thing Megara has to family.

what is their stand on mortals?

I found as I answered this question I was writing from Megan’s perspective, so I have written it in the form of a sample.

“Mortals. Such a dismissive word” Megan wasn’t sure if she was going to laugh or cry. The way the question was asked, it was so typical of the Gods. One word, one turn of phrase, could reduce everything other than themselves to nothing. “What am I? In this thought experiment.” She picked her nails as she leant back, eyes caught somewhere in the distance, unable to meet the gaze of her companion. “Am I mortal? I am no God. I am not divine – nor am I special, I just…” She paused there, despite all the knowledge she had gained it still felt unnatural to consider herself and Megara the same person. “She just… Heracles was the special one. Not me.”

Finally, she was able to meet their gaze. The thread of assertiveness that had always lurked under the surface of her passivity rearing its head. “But when you talk of Mortals you don’t mean me do you? You mean all those we are surrounded by, real and free and so completely oblivious of the truth. You want to know my stand on mortals? I envy them.”

She envied the choices that lay ahead of them; she envied their lives, so self-centred, concerned only with the reality within their own heads. She envied their certainty in their own identity, and their absolute irrelevance to most of the Gods. How she craved that, to disappear amongst the crowd, to be just another mortal.

To be anything other than what she was, both relevant, and yet nothing at the same time.

Megan had studied English Literature. She knew the difference between a character and a plot device.

☆ﾟ*・ GIVE US A SAMPLE OF YOUR WRITING!

The rich black leather of her purse met the top of a corner table roughly, practically mimicking the way she fell into the booth behind it. Hers was a frustration that could not be confined by her form. Hell, she practically emanated it, changing the energy of the otherwise peaceful room. The little cup before her spilled a few drops on the table from such jostling, and she paid them no mind.

“I should become a psychiatrist,” she sneered to herself. “Everyone tells me their problems anyway. Might as well make a little extra money for it.”

—

Leave it alone, the little voice in Megan’s head, the little voice that had an all too annoying habit of being right, was screaming at her right now. Just leave it alone and get on with your work. She never had been good at listening to it, even when she knew she should.

The truth was Megan was bored. She was bored of her late-night shifts at the café. She was bored of the same faces, every day, of eyes that looked right through her, eyes that dismissed her, eyes that treated her as if she were nothing more than a simpleton. She thought she could feel her brains turning to mush the longer she stayed in this café.

So, the woman who had just entered, the woman who seemed to be carrying so much weight, who communicated so much simply in the way she fell into her seat, that was a woman with so much potential that Megan could not let her escape.

Rather than listening to her little voice, therefore, Megan instead found herself approaching the woman’s table, her pot of coffee ready in her hand, the perfect excuse for some form of engaging conversation.

“You might have some competition on that front.” Megan told her, a shy laugh upon her lips. “People seem to think waitresses are a lot like psychiatrists, except, of course, they don’t have to respect us. I’m pretty sure people have told me things they wouldn’t dream of telling their shrink.”

She filled up her coffee nervously, her weight shifting between her feet. Please, she thought, please just give me something interesting. “Of course, until we actually become psychiatrists, we’re under no obligation to keep their secrets. Terrifying thought for everyone else. Fun for us.”

[borisbubbles]

EUROVISION 2018 #5 & #4

05. SWITZERLAND ZiBBZ - “Stones” 32nd place

~*Wild Jokah On A Gole Froam*~

Yanking away the top NQ slot in this year’s ranking is, of course, everybody’s favourite Sibling alliance, ZiBZZ!! 

As you know, I looooooooove mental health awareness songs, and I particularly love those with approaches that work (*cough* NOT “Goodbye” *cough*). While most of these songs are doused in motherly, cloddlesome tones, “Stones” doesn’t beat around the bush and argues that one must confront their fears HEAD-ON. 

To transliterate the (ridic, amusing) lyrics into Common English: 

“People have always been shitbags and have treated others like crap for aeons and there’s nothing I can do about it because people won’t fucking change.. SO fucking WHAT? Why would let those assholes affect my present and future the same way they’ve influenced my past? Fuck that noise. It’s time to let the inner demons rest, grow as a person AND help others get out of the deep end while doing so.”. 

Holy fuck what an epic Truth BOMB, I can relate to all of that scalding hot tea. The best way to get around depression, anger and frustration *is* to 1) remove you from the toxic environment 2) find kindred spirits and support each other 3) find the courage to leave your past behind and build a future for yourself. Mental health is a BATTLEFIELD that HITS YOU with its best shots (did I just ref Pat Benatar twice? 🤭) while you’re struggling and “Stones” acklowedges this reality so hard. About fucking time someone lit the flares of ferocity to stand up against BULLYING and HATE. ALL HAIL COCO the ZiBB, FIRST OF HER NAME, THE UNDUN, MOTHER OF FLARES, KHALEESI OF THE DOWNTRODDEN, NON-THROWER OF STONES, BREAKER OF TABOOS, QUEEN OF THE HURT, TORMENTED AND BROWBEATEN. 

Ain’t the only one who don’t wanna throw stooooooooooones

But of course, message alone isn’t enough to get such a high ranking, but fortunately ZiBBZ delivered musically as well. “Stones” has the perfect type of melody for Eurovision: catchy,  repetitive and accessible, but never boring or tiresome because the arrangement was spot.fucking.on. The horns and tuba’s give the music so much gravitas, the backing AHEMs are excellent  and CoCo’s five-packs-a-day type of gravelly voice adds so much realness to the song. "Stones” as a whole is jarring and complex and succeeds at elliciting the emotional response it aims for. This is my favourite song of the 42, by no small margin. 

And then there’s the staging, which... I have mixed feelings about, not gonnal ie. It saddens me that even at this high a rank I must again resort to critique. I mean, the ACT was great. That motherfuckin’ flare is one of the few goosebump moments I got from this year, Coco is Minerva in a hipster body, Stee is a lovable goof, but... you have this amazing, dynamic song that is capable BLOWING EVERYONE AWAY and it  kinda... doesn’t? 

I would say that “Stones” was mostly hampered by its camerawork, which was mostly AWFUL. Which idiot [Hans Pancake 🙄] is responsible for framing such a powerful, uptempo song with slow, drawn-out shots?

I mean, shots such as this one:

(why didn’t they just focus on Stee??? or the audience?)

and that one:

(You can clearly see Coco throwing away a drumstick at the start of the preformance... Why the faraway shots?? Why no close-ups when she’s drumming happening???? NO ONE CARED ABOUT SANNA’S LIGHT CAGE SO WHY WOULD THEY START CARING NOW??? (seriously, fuck you Hans Culpepper))

This is the reason why “Stones” failed to ensnare the audience’s attention. Wrong people with the right to stage and ZiBBZ can’t do anything about it. I chose to not take it into account when I decided on their final ranking, but it’s sooooo frustrating to see Switzerland FINALLY strike the motherload and fall flat because of some moronic cinematographic decisions. Now watch Switz pick something mediocre and be overrated by the Basics/NQ once again (lol I say this without having listened to the Swiss songs, but can you blame me?). Oh well, ZiBBZ have since moved on to better things -

- and so should we :). Still praying they pull a Poli in five years or so. THE WORLD NEEDS IT

04. SLOVENIA Lea Sirk - “Hvala, ne!” 22nd place

Damn’ this is such a tough decision. Cutting entries loose at this point really hurts y’all.

So as you know, I really, REALLY fucking love Lea Sirk and even said that, in the unlikely event that she qualified, she’d WIN the ranking. However, while I am probably obliged by contract to grant her the first place, I can honestly say that... I like my top three more?  Lea could have easily won this ranking, had my opinions on Elina, DoReDos and Ieva stayed the same; but they didn’t (they went up obvi), so here we are. The above paragraph is just a disclaimer to explain why Slovenia don’t rank higher than they do, because holy fuck this "Hvala, ne!” was awesoooooooooome. Anti-establishmentarian trap-pop that was a shock qualifier and made a flashy gimmick work TWICE <3 There’s a reason why the Good Gays Fanbase (do I include myself in that? hmmm 🤔) have nicknamed it “Hvala Slay!”. 

But first, (-- Julie Chen-Moonves) let’s discuss the PHENOMENON that is Lea Sirk. My love for her predates this contest by several years, from the time when I only knew her as the botty cyborg sidekick to the heiress of the Ravenclaw Empire herself, Tinkara Kovac. 

“KEN U BEE-LIEF ET???”

who happens to be *my* fave of Outstanding Eurovision Year 2014 (Yes, over Conchita, go cry) and is a contender for fave entry of the decade. The Summer of 2014 was a fantastic experience, partly thanks to Lea and I will forever cherish her for that reason. So when this beautiful dubstep fae was selected to rep Slovenia, now sporting a lilac killer braid, a trashbag jumpsuit and a cabal of slut-dropping dance devas of destruction... like *instantly* fanning my proverbial clit right there. It only got better during Lea’s pre-show content, proving her not only cool chick onstage, but off the stage as well. Having a teenage girl crush on Waylon <3 (Confessing this IN FRONT OF A LIVE AUDIENCE WHICH INCLUDED BOTH WAYLON AND HER HUSBAND lmao bless <3). Impersonating Salvador on some Slovene version of the Soundmix Show <3 There’s no way Lea couldn’t deliver in Lisbon.

And “deliver” is underselling what Lea did, holy fucking hell that live was EVERYTHING. It’s hard to even name what the brightest shining star of their performance was, since Slovenia brought an entire fucking galaxy  of them. I’d say the best thing was probably the choreography, which managed to be spellbinding, professional and hilarious all at once.  Lea and her dancers-in-crime put on an amazing, electrifying show, aided by dynamic camerawork and lighting (Take note, Hans Pancake 🙄). 

My personal fave thing about “Hvala ne!” however was that it QUALIFIED BY A COMFORTABLE MARGIN AND WOULD HAVE UNDER ANY POINTS SYSTEM <345871 I love a deserving shock qualifier (see: Albania), but when it happens to a preshow fave of mine that I considered all but doomed (and a contender for last in the semi). . . There are no superlatives in my glossary that can describe the state of elation I felt when Lea was announced as a finalist. Netta might as well cede her trophy because the Eurogaes were the actual winners of this year 💗🧡💛💚💙💜 “Hvala, ne!” more like “HVALA motherfucking SLAYS HATERS” amirite???

Granted “Hvala, ne!” was the same in Lisbon as during the preshow, with only two marked exceptions. One was Lea had added a chorus in shabby Portuguese (”OBRIGADA NAO NAO!!!” <3) which was hilar, and the other was... the break!

Granted the semi break was kinda *blah* to me. “Zomg the music dies riiiiiiight before the bridge how coincidental”. Sure, Jan. Either way, I found it moderately funny, mostly because of the random extras that were clearly being paid by production to oversell it <3 

But the best thing was that it WORKED and brought Lea to the finale where she performed a SECOND break and this one was downright epic. The audience actually sang along with her <3 <3 <3 <3 Two different instances of the same gimmick and making it work BOTH times <3 When will YOUR faves???

I suppose that, at the end of the day, “Hvala, ne!” was an experimental song that you either love or hate. Why anyone would ever hate this radiant nymph is beyond me, but whatever. My ranking, my rules, ya shallow fools. I *loved* this bizarre mix of K-Pop and Hip-Hop, sung in Slovene and Portuguese, (which is the most unique combination of languages ever featured in a Eurovision entry, I’m sure <3), with badass self-referential lyrics that SLAM DOWN musical conformity in a year that was all about rewarding it. In other words PRECISELY WHAT THIS CONTEST NEEDED. You know, there are plenty of countries out there that have never scored a top five in Eurovision and probably never will until they find their monster runaway winner (Lordi, Salvador). I *hope* the next one is from Slovenia. Raiven performing a song by Maraaya, with Lea and BQL as the back-up singers. Come on y’all, let’s make Eurovision Great Again. Hvala, slay, slay, slay, slay

 RANKING SO FAR

04. Slovenia (Lea Sirk - “Hvala, ne!”)

05. Switzerland (ZiBBZ - “Stones”)

06. Germany (Michael Schulte - “You let me walk alone”)

07. Albania (Eugent Bushpepa - “Mall”)

08. France (Madame Monsieur - “Mercy”)

09. Hungary (AWS - “Viszlát nyár”)

10. Finland (Saara Aalto - “Monsters”)

11. Bulgaria (EQUINOX - “Bones”)

12. Denmark (Rasmussen - “Higher ground”)

13. Malta (Christabelle - “Taboo”)

14. Cyprus (Eleni Foureira - “Fuego”)

15. United Kingdom (SuRie - “Storm”)

16. Serbia (Balkanika - “Nova Deca”)

17. Portugal (Cláudia Pascoal - “O jardim”)

18. The Netherlands (Waylon - “Outlaw in ‘em”)

19. Ukraine (MÉLOVIN - “Under the ladder”)

20. Macedonia (Eye Cue - “Lost and Found”)

21. San Marino (Jessika ft. Jenifer Brening - “Who We Are”)

22. Sweden (Benjamin Ingrosso - “Dance You Off”)

23. Austria (Cesár Sampson - “Nobody but you”)

24. Latvia (Laura Rizzotto - “Funny girl”)

25. Azerbaijan (AISEL - “X my heart”)

26. Israel (Netta - “Toy”)

27. Norway (Alexander Rybak  - “That’s how you write a song”)

28. Montenegro (Vanja Radovanovic - “Inje”)

29. Armenia (Sevak Khanagyan - “Qami”)

30. Poland (Gromee ft. Lukas Meijer - “Light me up”)

31. Greece (Yianna Terzi - “Oniro mou”)

32. Georgia (Iriao - “For you”)

33. Belgium (Sennek - “A matter of time”)

34. Italy (Ermal Meta & Fabrizio Moro - “Non mi avete fatto niente”)

35. Romania (The Humans - “Goodbye”)

36. Ireland (Ryan O'Shaughnessy - “Together”)

37. Croatia (Franka - “Crazy”)

38. Belarus (ALEKSEEV - “Forever”)

39. Russia (Julia Samoylova - “I Won’t Break”)

40. Spain (Amaia & Alfred - “Tu canción”)

41. Iceland (Ari Ólafsson - “Our choice”)

42. Australia (Jessica Mauboy - “We got love”)

43. Czech Republic (Mikolas Jozef - “Lie to me”)

[starlessskies94]

Like Father, Like Daughter (Negan/BlakeAU) Chapter Four

I am really enjoying writing this story! This chapter is a little shorter than the last one but it’s all about papa Negan and I love it so I hope ya’ll like it too! 

Big thank you once again to @neganandblake for your support, advice and kindness lovely! You are awesome and wonderful Queen! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Chapter Four...

Negan stood with cold eyes, never once slowing on the trigger of his gun. Watching as the bodies of the dead toppled to the floor. A heap of tangled remains; littering the ground. The growls and snarls slowly dying into an eerie silence. The clip now empty as he threw the gun to the ground, hopping down from the truck; a victorious smug grin plastered across his face.

“And that Beansprout; is how you do it!” He bragged, but no reply followed. No voice from the young girl that minutes ago, had been stood firmly by his side.

He whipped around hastily, eyes frantically looking for his daughter. 

“Mia! Mia where are you?!” Still no reply. 

“Mia! This isn’t fuckin’ funny kiddo, get your ass out here!” When he still received no answer, his blood ran cold. Breath short, heart pounding in his chest. The tall Saviour marched with long strides through the sea of dead bodies; both his own men and walkers alike. As he reluctantly searched for a head of blonde hair. But nothing. He found nothing. 

There was no sign of her. And he was beginning to worry now. 

“Sir...” The Saviour started timidly as his leader turned to face him, grip on Lucille now tightening to the point of knuckles becoming white. “Some of the boys went after the horde when they headed towards the woods...and uh...well...Williams...he found this...I’m so sorry Negan.” 

Negan stood numb looking at the dark thin jacket. Mia’s jacket. Now torn and soaked in blood. But that wasn’t possible. She’d been with him, stayed with him. Why the fuck would she have headed towards the woods. She knew better than that. He’d taught her better than that.

With trembling hands; Negan took the jacket from the man as he took a respectful step back to rejoin the others. As their leader ran the ripped material through his fingers, anger bubbling in his chest. 

No. No his Mia. Not her! She wasn’t dead, he wouldn’t accept it. She was out there and he was going to find her and bring her home.

“Spread out, all of you. And don’t come back till you find something that gives us an idea where she went.” He ordered in a dark, gravelly voice.

But his men never moved. Instead all shuffling on unsteady feet, eyes cast towards the floor. Grief stricken, pitiful looks on their faces. But Negan didn’t want their fucking pity, he wanted them to act.

“DID I FUCKIN’ STUTTER?!” He bellowed, several men flinching at his booming voice. “I BELIEVE I GAVE YOU GODDAMN ORDER, SO YOU WILL DO YOUR FUCKIN’ JOBS AND FUCKIN’ MOVE!”

The men each backed away from their leader, not wanting to get caught in Negan’s wrath as he roared at them. The man truly terrifying; slamming his bat down on the hoods of one of the cars to emphasize his point; causing each man to stand to attention, all rushing off in different directions. Leaving him standing with a stone cold tightened jaw as he watched them scurry away like the little scared mice they were. 

Releasing a deep hard huff from his flared nostrils; he turned back towards the store windows. Taking a second before he wandered inside alone.

The place was deathly silent now. More undead slayed and laid out upon the grime covered titles. He stepped behind the counter, laying down Lucille carefully on its surface. His other hand bringing up the jacket to his face. 

His heart aching. He hadn’t even noticed Mia had disappeared. What kind of father was he, if he couldn’t even protect his own daughter? 

The thought of those monsters touching his little girl, tearing at her flesh. Her pains screams echoing as she cried for her dad to save her, but never appearing. He hadn’t been there. He’d failed her. 

Even if she was alive..he couldn’t imagine what state she would be in. Scared and alone. With no idea how to get home. They were miles away from the Sanctuary, at least a day and half drive. On foot with the surrounding dangers, she’d have no chance of making it back. 

His head was spinning, heart aching and tightening in his chest until it felt hard to breath. His baby girl...his Beansprout was gone. 

Knees buckled, blood still running cold til it consumed him. The tears coming fast and hard. As he finally let himself collapse, sliding down the wall. Clutching Mia’s blood soaked jacket like the child he’d lost. 

Who was he kidding? Raising a damn kid. Being a dad. Promising to protect her from a world that took the living every fucking day. It was a living lie. The whole idea...a damn lie. No one was safe. No one could promise absolutely that they were a hundred percent safe and would always remain so. He felt useless. 

And Blake...his Peaches...Fuck, she would never forgive him for this. He would never forgive himself for this. He’d lost their only baby.  And he’d broken the only promise he’d made to the love of his life.  

He wouldn’t blame her for hating him for it. Though in this moment, he didn’t think it was possible for anyone to hate Negan as much as he hated himself. 

Mia didn’t deserve this, she was just a kid. With a whole life to live. And he so desperately wanted to trade places with her. Why couldn’t it be him?! God let it be him instead. 

The moment came when his men eventually began to return from their searching, giving Negan a single second to compost himself before joining them. For there was no way in hell, he’d ever let them see him like this. Weak, soft and useless.

However, it was as challenge in itself, to not breakdown a second time when they informed him that they’d found no trace or sign of Mia’s whereabouts. Save for the discarded jacket. 

But something told him there was still some shred of hope. That she was still out there. He credited it to some ridiculous fatherly instincts that now; he was seriously beginning to question he ever had in the first place. 

But he knew if there was a chance to find her safe, he had to take it. 

So ordering the men back into the trucks; he climbed into the drivers seat. Pushing away the slight pang of hurt at the empty passenger seat Mia had once occupied. Revving the engine and hitting the gas, he slowly pulled away from the small town, once again left to the dead and the dying.

For now he only had one mission in mind. The only one that really mattered. He would search every inch of land, far and wide. No matter how long it took. He would brave whatever weather, whatever obstacles, whatever enemy that attempted to get in his way. 

He would find his baby girl. Alive and well and in one piece. And would bring his little Beansprout home. Because in the end, the wasn’t just a Saviour. He was a father and he would bring down the whole world if it dared to even harm a single hair on his daughter’s head.  

He would bring Mia home. Even if he had to walk through hell to do it. 

Tag List: @neganandblake @laura-clapton

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[mermaidsirennikita]

May 2018 Book Roundup

I don’t know when I got so into thrillers--but here we are.  Of course, I’m not as into the types of thrillers that are about a cop pursuing a killer.  It’s more the insidious types of domestic thrillers that catch my attention, about idle suburbanites who secretly harbor paranoid minds and little hatreds.  That’s probably why I enjoyed “A Simple Favor” by Darcey Bell and Liv Constantine’s “The Last Mrs. Parrish”, however much they polarized readers.  They both feature horrible women, stupid men, unreliable narrators, and endings that don’t neatly tie up loose ends.  In other words, they’re perfect summer reads.

The Defiant by Lesley Livingston.  3/5.  The second in a series, The Defiant returns to the world of female gladiators and in particular Fallon.  Now triumphant and happy in a ludus run by her sister, Sorcha, Fallon expects to have it easier.  However, her life is upturned when the women of the ludus are accused of rebelling, and Sorcha goes missing.  I rated The Valiant, the first book in this series, four stars so I must have enjoyed it, but I also don’t really remember it, aside from the basic plot and being interested in Sorcha and Fallon’s relationship.  I would still say that the sister relationship is the core focus of the plot, which is different (and distracts from a fairly shallow romance between Fallon and Cai, a Roman soldier; there’s an opportunity for something cooler, but the author bypasses that completely).  But I think I’m over this series; this book drove home that it skews too young for me to enjoy it.  The gladiatrix thing is cool, but there’s so much in this book about how the ludus is home, and like... hasn’t everyone been enslaved by Romans to some degree?  Taken from their homelands?  Forced into a blood sport to be entertainment?  It’s fun, and I won’t say that it isn’t without merits, but this is too shallow for what it takes on.

Fatal Throne by Candace Fleming et. al.  4/5.  A collaborative novel from the perspectives of all six of Henry VIII’s queens--and Henry himself.  What impressed me about this book was how it wasn’t really straightforward.  It seems like it might be at first; Catherine of Aragon’s section kicks it off by detailing the beginning of Catherine’s life in England, up until her marriage is collapsing.  Now, don’t think that this makes it a bad story; I quite liked it.  Catherine of Aragon is, in this version, for once more than a stereotypical zealot queen, though the author does that thing where a character whose native tongue is Spanish constantly throws random Spanish words into English sentences, which doesn’t feel real.  But anyway; many of the other stories are less traditional.  All revolve around the queens’ downfalls or deaths; for example, Anne (or Anna, as she’s called here) of Cleves has a story that really centers around her dying days, and the ghosts of her past.  There’s a weird, haunting creepiness to everything.  Though there are some rather shallow moments--including one bit in the Anne Boleyn story that seemed... pretty off--and there isn’t any reinventing of the wheel, it’s a sad retelling of the wives’ story, where the central villain is undeniably Henry VIII.

Ash Princess by Laura Sebastian.  2/5.  Theodosia was a child when she was forced to witness the murder of her mother, the queen of Astrea.  Since then she’s been beaten and terrorized in the submission by the conquering Kaiser, forced to live as Lady Thora, the Ash Princess.  The combination of being forced to commit a terrible act and the reappearance of a childhood friend wakes Thora to the reality of her people’s suffering, and spurs her to action.  She’s given a task: seduce the crown prince, and kill him.  So yeah, pretty typical fantasy stuff, but that doesn’t mean it has to be bad.  What makes it bad is Theo’s flip-flopping as a character and a truly dismal love triangle.  Neither romance feels real, and Theo’s constantly between dithering and acting like... Stormborn-lite.  Oh, yes.  The GoT influence is strong in this one.  I just wish it had been more interesting.

Love and Ruin by Paula McLain.  3/5.  The turbulent romance between Ernest Hemingway and his third wife, writer Martha Gellhorn, is told from Gellhorn’s perspective.  I remember really liking McLain’s version of Hemingway’s first marriage, “The Paris Wife”, but that was so long ago that I can’t remember much of it.  And for that matter, that marriage--which occurred during Hemingway’s years as part of the Lost Generation in Paris--was a very different animal from what he shared with Gellhorn.  You get the expected beats--Gellhorn and Hemingway meeting, her being initially starstruck while harboring her own ambitions, their work during the Spanish Civil War, the affair that led to a marriage, and that marriage’s destruction because Hemingway was incapable of holding a decent relationship and Gellhorn’s fierce independence kept her from being the idealized wife he wanted--but while the writing is pretty... the expectedness keeps the book from being more than exactly what it is.  And though obviously Gellhorn was a good bit younger than Hemingway and obviously her love for him and hero worship of him allowed to overlook shit long enough to up and marry the guy...  I just don’t really buy that Martha Gellhorn would speak and act the way McLain seems to think she did.  She’s so over the top as a young woman in love.  The book is fine, it’s just uninspired.

Trespassing by Brandi Reeds. 4/5.  Veronica is at her wit’s end, caring for a toddler while her husband is often gone for work as a pilot, while at the same time pumping herself full of hormones for her fertility treatments in order to have a second child.  Still traumatized by the miscarriage she suffered recently, she is shocked when her husband, Micah, doesn’t come home--on the same day that their daughter claims that “Daddy went to God Land”.  Swept up in a mess of emotions and falling under suspicion from the police, Veronica flees with her daughter to the Florida Keys, where her husband had a house in her name.  But the island life presents even more questions.  Who are the children in the photos she finds, and why is Micah with them?  This is a solid, engaging thriller that somehow is at its most disturbing when you consider the fact that Veronica’s mind is rattled in part because of what she’s put her body through via fertility treatments.  Veronica is sympathetic, and rather than stupidly accepting things like thriller protagonists often do, she’s paranoid, protective, never quite trusting anyone.  Why should she?  While I won’t say that the reveal in the end is one of the best I’ve read, the story as a whole is very interesting, and I appreciated the fact that Reeds really delved into the mind of a woman with a bit of feminine body horror--like, in a sensitive way.  It’s different.  The book is as much about Veronica’s identity as anything else.

The Last Mrs. Parrish by Liv Constantine.  4/5.  Amber envies the lives of glamorous trophy wives, none of them more than Daphne Parrish.  Daphne has it all: a handsome, doting, extraordinarily wealthy husband, two daughters, and all of the possessions she could desire.  So she begins her plan: befriend Daphne under the guise of a homely, Pollyanna type and steal her life.  But as Amber becomes closer to Daphne, she constantly has to look over her shoulder for ghosts from her past that could disrupt her plan.  Little does she know that the real danger could be closer than she thinks.  This book was kind of disturbing and definitely does not have the type of ending that will leave you.... feeling morally good.  But it’s juicy. It’s Big Little Lies kind of juicy, about vaguely psychotic women with rich and famous lives.  Frankly, I would have appreciated more development of the female characters aside from Amber and Daphne, but the two of them were great as is.  You spend about half the book in Amber’s mind, and she is HEINOUS.  But in an interesting, darkly funny way.  The book isn’t going to be for everyone, but I found it extremely entertaining.

Next Year in Havana by Chanel Cleeton.  2/5.  Marisol has never been to Cuba, the homeland her grandmother, Elisa, fled as a young woman.  She returns to scatter Elisa’s ashes after the death of Fidel Castro.  However, she didn’t expect to connect with Luis, a historian and dissenter in the current regime--nor did she expect to discover that her grandmother had an affair with a revolutionary.  This book has a lot to say about Cuban politics; and I value that.  But unfortunately, the political backdrop takes over the story, which is very paint by numbers.  Nothing surprising happens.  The characters are dry.  I wish I loved it, but I just didn’t.

From Twinkle, with Love by Sandhya Menon.  3/5.  Teenage Twinkle is an aspiring filmmaker, out of sorts as her relationship with her best friend Maddie--newly popular while Twinkle remains a bit of nerd--deteriorates.  She’s surprised when Sahil--the shy twin brother of her crush, Neil--asks her to collaborate on him on a gender-flipped version of Dracula, but it isn’t long before she’s starting to look at Sahil in a very different way.  At the same time, however, she’s corresponding via email with her secret admirer, N--who she very much suspects is Neil.  What is Twinkle to do?  I loved Menon’s debut, When Dimple Met Rishi, and I’m still very excited for the spinoff of that book.  It was a perfect little romcom.  This was not.  This book read much younger--and Twinkle and Sahil are a bit younger than Dimple and Rishi were.  But their voices were also VERY immature, and in general it just... missed the mark for me.  I think someone younger would love this book.  It did touch on several really great threads, especially with Twinkle’s family.  But I didn’t feel the same thing I felt with WDMR at all.

Furyborn by Claire Legrand.  4/5.  When her best friend Prince Audric finds his life endangered, Rielle saves him--exposing herself as capable of wielding all seven types of elemental magic.  There are two people foretold to have this gift; one will be a queen who brings light and salvation, while the other holds blood and destruction.  Put to the test in a series of trials, Rielle must prove exactly which one she is.  A thousand years later, bounty hunter Eliana is shocked to find her mother kidnapped, with the only person who can help find her being a rebel leader.  In joining up with him, Eliana defies the empire she’s worked for--and puts herself in terrible danger.  This book is an interesting one; the two narratives you’re following are focused heavily on their respective leads, and neither woman is traditionally “good”.  Eliana has the charm of being a tortured rogue, at least--Rielle is more complex, obsessed with adulation and self-centered to the point of callousness.  But I enjoyed both of them, with Eliana’s story picking up a few points over Rielle’s towards the end... which was a pleasant surprise, as at first I wasn’t sure if Eliana’s side of things would measure up to Rielle’s.  There is a lot amgoing on, so things can get a bit confusing--and this makes the middle drag a bit.  But the ending left me dying for more, with the only other complaint I can make being that Legrand could work on her sex scenes a tad.  But if you’re looking for a female-centered story with a few guys who are all about that undying devotion thing, plus a sexy villain and moral ambiguity, I recommend this one highly.

One Match Fire by Lissa Linden.  2/5.  Twelve years ago, Paul and Amy were camp counselors--and he broke her heart.  Now Amy is back to run the camp after Paul quits, though they don’t realize that they’ll be meeting up again until she’s at his door, physically different but emotionally still affected by what happened between them during their teen years.  Both frustrated and with few other options, they make a deal: until Paul leaves, they’ll have a purely sexual relationship.  But Paul wants to know what really has Amy rattled--and he doesn’t want to leave anymore.  I like romance, I like erotica--I wasn’t sure how to categorize this book, as most of it is graphic sex but I don’t know, the erotica bells weren’t quite ringing for me--but I still need stakes.  They don’t need to be fantasy stakes.  They don’t need to be thriller stakes.  It could be that the family business is about to go under; it could be that the leads are dueling lawyers.  STAKES.  This book has no stakes.  I thought that Paul did something super shitty when these (28 year old) people were kids, but like... it was a bit douchey, but tons of people were dicks to me in high school, I was a dick back, and I don’t remember much of it.  Certainly, I found Amy’s reaction a bit over the top.  At the same time, Paul was--very shortly into this sexual relationship--being like “give yourself to me emotionally Amy” and I was like lmao dude why y’all haven’t spoken there is no reason for you to be so invested in this woman.  He was so pushy, it really irked me.  The sex scenes were okay.  “Will these two people run a camp together” just wasn’t a big enough question to keep me interested.

A Simple Favor by Darcey Bell.  4/5.  Widowed, neurotic mommy blogger Stephanie has found the best friend of her dreams in Emily Nelson, a wealthy publicity exec with a handsome husband and beloved son Nicky, who happens to be the best friend of Stephanie’s son Miles.  So when Emily asks Stephanie for a “simple favor”--to watch Nicky for a few hours after school--Stephanie doesn’t hesitate to do so.  But when Emily doesn’t show to pick Nicky up--when she isn’t even home by the time her husband Sean returns from a business trip--Stephanie goes on red alert.  It isn’t long before the police find Emily’s body; and it also isn’t long before Stephanie begins taking her place.  As Stephanie begins receiving odd messages, the question is impossible to avoid: what really happened to Emily Nelson?  Alternating between Stephanie’s blog posts and the characters’ perspectives, “A Simple Favor” is one of those thrillers that is kind of balls to the wall insane.  You can expect to find that Emily wasn’t all that she appeared to be.  But Stephanie’s secrets are just as great, if not greater.  I’ve seen a common complaint regarding this book regarding the fact that none of the characters are good people.  For me, that just made it more delicious.  Emily is this enigmatic, alluring figure luring over the entire story, and you just can’t shake her appeal.

[fuckyeahevanrwood]

The Road Less Traveled: Westworld’s Evan Rachel Wood does nothing by the book

Evan Rachel Wood can ride a horse and shoot a rifle at the same time. She can’t tell you why she knows how to do that—while wearing a prairie dress, playing a character that is a robot, and galloping through the Utah desert for the HBO series Westworld, now in its second season. She just does it.

It’s the same with acting, in general, which the 30-year-old has been doing since she was 5. She can’t explain it. She does it.

“It’s an energetic thing, I don’t know. My senses are different,” Wood says over a lunch of scrambled eggs at a bar in Silver Lake. “I have terrible fine motor skills, but I can shoot a scene on a horse with a gun in one take. I have synesthesia, which means that I can hear color and feel sound. I thought everyone experienced the world that way. I’m fascinated by the way our brains work, and I was reading about psychology and learned about what synesthesia was, and I thought, ‘Wait. Other people don’t feel that?’”

Even if you haven’t seen her eerie performance as Westworld’s Dolores (which earned her both Golden Globe and Emmy nods), living a preprogrammed life in a sort of alternate-reality game where wealthy players get to act out twisted Old West fantasies among androids, chances are Wood has left a lasting impression on you from a different role. Starting with a few dramas on television (among them Once and Againand the original American Gothic) and her breakout role as a troubled teen in Catherine Hardwicke’s 2003 film Thirteen, Wood has had an intense, often smoldering and mature on-screen presence for two decades. She played Mickey Rourke’s daughter in The Wrestler, a promiscuous intern in George Clooney’s The Ides of March and the vampire queen of Louisiana in True Blood. In person, Wood does not present as a boldly provocative movie star. Wearing wide-leg faded jeans, a striped T-shirt, tortoiseshell glasses and Vans, her hair in a reddish bob, you might guess that she is a manager at Urban Outfitters. She looks younger than she is, which she credits to sunscreen (La Roche-Posay). And though she spent her adolescent years living and attending acting classes in the San Fernando Valley, she now prefers the vibe on the east side of Los Angeles, where she spends time with her friends, mostly fellow musicians (she’s a singer) and actors. And when she isn’t working here in town, or on the Westworld set near Moab, she calls Nashville, Tenn., home.

“Los Angeles can be too intense for me,” she says, explaining that she wants her son, who is 4 (his father is Wood’s ex, actor Jamie Bell), to have some space to be a kid, both literally and figuratively. “I feel like I’m always working here, even just walking down the street. Nashville is great because there are so many creative people there who are working and doing cool things, but nobody cares what you do. Or if they do, they’re lovely about it. I didn’t buy a farm or anything, but I have a yard and a guesthouse. There’s nature and a community. I wanted all of that for my son. I was just a couple of years older than he is when [my career] really started. And it’s weird to think about how short his life has been, and that is the only amount of time I had before I became an actor. I really like my life, the good and the bad of it, but I wouldn’t let my son do it.”

When you watch performers grow up on screen, you can see how their choices shape them, and see who they are becoming based on the roles they take. Wood was raised in a North Carolina theater that her father ran surrounded by a “melting pot” of cultures, personalities and sexualities, and she has been working steadily for 25 years. At first, with her long, straw-blond hair and fair skin, she was cast as a thoughtful, serious daughter. Then, as she matured, she understood that her tastes were more eccentric. (You may remember that she was in a long-term relationship with Marilyn Manson.)

“I’ve never wanted to go down the road everyone else was going down,” she says. “I wanted to go down the alleys and learn about the people who were different, talk to the weirdos and know their stories. I don’t always play dark characters. I mean, I’ve done comedies. But the darker roles are what people tend to remember.”

Her latest big-screen role is Laura, a psychologically complicated cleaning woman who has a tangled family life and intense sexual encounters with strangers, in a film called Allure. Laura is a woman who is hard to like, who manipulates, traps and tortures a 16-year-old piano prodigy with a difficult home life of her own. Originally, the role was written for a man, by Canadian writer-director team Carlos and Jason Sanchez.

“Then they gender-swapped it, which is when they approached me,” Wood says. “That was intriguing to me, that this role was now female, which you don’t really see, and it did explore these kinds of situations in a way that I hadn’t quite seen before—from the eyes of two women. My biggest fear was that I wasn’t going to be a believable abuser, because I didn’t want to traumatize anyone. I think because I’ve been doing this since I was a teenager, I become very protective of younger actors.”

Since Wood publicly came out as bisexual in 2011, she has embraced her voice as an advocate for LGBT civil and women’s rights. She writes essays for Nylon magazine and speaks frankly about changing social mores surrounding sexual identity in our culture. Wood received the Human Rights Campaign Visibility Award at the 2017 North Carolina Gala, where she gave a candid speech about the importance of “representing the underrepresented.” Recently, she testified before Congress about her own history with sexual assault, detailing some truly horrific experiences but refusing to name her assailants, to protect herself from potentially draining court battles.

She experiments with androgyny in her personal style, gravitating more toward sleek, tailored suits and what she calls a “futuristic,” modern aesthetic with stylist Samantha McMillen. She has also written a couple of screenplays and started exploring paths behind the camera, mainly as a director. In the meantime, Westworld is more than enough to keep an active brain like Wood’s occupied. (And, as of season three, she is receiving equal pay to her male co-stars.)

“You can watch the show and go along with it, or you can put your detective hat on and try to figure it out. That’s what I love to do. I have a pretty good idea what it’s about. But there’s no way to really figure out this season. I read the final script and I said, ‘I have a couple of questions. First, what exactly is this?’”

The questions the show’s creators, Jonathan Nolan and Lisa Joy, ask about the origin of consciousness, and the potential for artificial intelligence to outpace its human creators, are interesting enough to keep the cast (which includes Thandie Newton, Jeffrey Wright and Anthony Hopkins) and the audience on their toes. It doesn’t hurt that there’s plenty of nudity.

“It’s not even weird anymore,” laughs Wood. “We’ve all been naked so often that it’s just normal. I show up to work and say, ‘OK, I’m naked in a lab. And Anthony Hopkins is here.’ It’s so surreal there isn’t even time to bestressed.”

And now that Wood is 30, she’s no longer the “baby” in the group and there is less pressure for her to prove herself time and again. She has experience, but still feels like she has a lot to learn.

“People listen to me differently now,” says Wood, and she understands what her older colleagues have been trying to tell her all of these years.

“Growing up as a child actor, I heard about regrets a lot,” she says. “I had a lot of people telling me not to live with regret. They drilled into my head how short and precious life is, so I made sure I didn’t care what anyone else thought.”

And, like everything else Wood does with convincing ease, when she says this, you believe her.

[imagine-loki]

The Baseborn Princess and the Aesir Prince

TITLE: The Baseborn Princess and the Aesir Prince

CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 7 AUTHOR: wolfpawn ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine you’re a bastard daughter of a king of a far-off realm, the product of his drunken loneliness at battle. His guilt of cheating on his wife drove him to send you to live on Midgard, but due to the fact that his other children (and his wife) adore you, you’re often invited to visit. RATING: Teen and Up

Loki held Clodagh’s hand as they walked through the palace. Some of the princesses were still walking around, some had left to go home already. They watched as Loki and Clodagh walked by, even paying attention to how Loki stood protectively next to her. There were whispers and looks, but they paid little heed to them. They did not stop until Loki brought her to a corridor she had never seen before, there were only a few doors on it and all spread apart and with guards outside every room. He walked to the far end, to the largest doors, gold emblems covered it. It did not take more than a second to know whose they were. Loki knocked twice and a servant answered, they walked in and requested to speak with his parents. The servant told them that the Allmother and Allfather were currently elsewhere, but that they would retrieve them, so to remain there as they sought them.

Loki brought Clodagh to a chair to sit, but she never reached the seat, instead, she rushed off to the other side of the room. Confused he looked to see where she was going, smiling a moment later when he realised who was there.

‘Hey boys, did you miss me?’ The two ravens cawed. ‘Hey, I have two hands, don’t worry, I can play with you both. So...what did you do after I left yesterday, hmm?’ One of them toyed with her hair. ‘Well I hardly meant him, I haven’t seen this one in three days, I thought I offended you.’ The other raven cawed.

Loki watched as she interacted with the two birds. They seemed to almost speak with her, it was incredible to see two animals he had known to always be very reserved be so animated with her. He realised then that they were far more outgoing than he realised, and why his father always kept them. He turned slightly to sit down only to realise that his parents had entered the room again without their noticing. His father watching curiously as Clodagh spoke with the birds, scratching Muninn’s chin. ‘He’s never let me do that.’

Clodagh turned slightly, startled to hear more voices in the room. ‘You mustn’t do it right then.’ She smiled as Huginn tossed some of her hair in his beak, looking for more attention. ‘Fine, you spoilt featherbrain.’ She smiled as she toyed with the feathered between his eyes.

Loki found himself laughing at the fact that the first time Clodagh had met every member of his family, she had not shown one of them the correct manner of greeting. He looked to his mother, who seemed to be thinking the same and then to his father, who knew of her slight fault and was incredibly curious as to her actions nonetheless. ‘We returned a few minutes ago.’ Loki informed his parents, knowing better than to draw attention to Clodagh’s slight faux pas.

‘How was Alfheim?’

‘Incredibly peaceful, bar a fox that seemed to think I was planning to steal its spot.’

‘Rua has slept there for several years, you shouldn’t have sat there, I warned you.’

‘It was the warmest seat in the house and that fox has a thick coat.’

‘Well he was there before you, so you have to lump it.’ She stated factually. ‘I couldn’t come in here and expect you guys to give me your perch, could I?’ She asked the ravens, immediately, Huginn moved to one side and Muninn the other making considerable room in the middle. ‘Is that for me?’ they both cawed. ‘Well, you two are just too good.’

The Aesir royals watched in awe as Clodagh seemed to forget where she even was to interact with the animals.

‘She is going to insult and blank every Lord and foreign dignitary in this realms.’ Odin chuckled.

‘They need a good dressing down most of them.’ Frigga smiled back before walking over to Clodagh. ‘Your father and...what do you call Lydia?’

‘Just Lydia.’

‘I see, they are anxious to know of your return.’ Clodagh looked away. ‘It is important that this all is done properly.’

‘There’s nothing proper about it though.’

Frigga tilted her head slightly in acknowledgement of the fact. ‘True, but I dare say you don’t want to be giving the little brats more to comment on.’ She linked her arm and gently pulled Clodagh away from the two ravens and passed Loki, who quickly joined them. ‘Family is important, I know you love your siblings terribly, they are all here and are very insistent on seeing you.’

‘But how could they have thought I would be back?’

‘You are known to be stubborn, but I suppose I can leave you in on a little secret now you are marrying my son…..Loki is as stubborn as a mule, he gets it from his father.’

‘I heard that.’ Odin growled.

‘Did I sound like I was whispering?’ She gave a side glance at her husband. ‘Loki stay here.’

‘NO!’ Immediately Clodagh reached out for Loki, who took her hand in his. ‘I can’t do this alone, I need him there.’

‘But your family…’

‘When Sika and Lydia were told of Hogun and my brother’s partners, they were seen as family right then, that stands for me too, if they asked that we have time as family, it always includes partners, it is the Light Elf way.’ Frigga could not argue that and nodded slightly, leaving Loki to take Clodagh to her family, neither speaking en route.

When they arrived at the area of the palace that held where her family were staying, Clodagh paused outside the room. ‘Hey, are you okay?’ Loki looked at her in concern.

‘I don’t know.’ She admitted. ‘I know I love them, but I never felt….They aren’t really….a family is more than genetic links.’

‘Yes, it is, but they love you, you matter to them, they are your family.’ Loki insisted. ‘You should have seen Amelia’s face when you left, she wanted to tear Laura apart, your brothers, they had to be restrained physically when Laura’s father acted as though she did nothing wrong.’

‘Pointing out the truth is not wrong.’

‘If she said to you in private, can I ask if you are….illegitimate, that is not being cruel and vindictive, she, however, declared to the whole room that you were and called you a horrific word doing it, then she tried to justify herself. There is no justifying that.’ Loki kissed her chastely. ‘Come on.’ He knocked on the door and a maid answered, immediately making room when she realised who was standing there.

On walking in, Amelia, who was sitting between Hogun and Eoin rushed to her feet and hugged her sister to her. ‘Clods.’ she cried into her sister’s shoulder. ‘I’m so sorry.’

‘It wasn’t your fault.’

‘She is so horrible, you missed the Allmother and Loki tearing her apart in the hall for what she did, it was brilliant.’ Amelia promised.

‘I suffered humiliation, it does not mean I approve of others suffering it.’ Clodagh gave Loki a small glance, Loki looked back unapologetically.

Her brothers and their families spoke with her too, her nephew sitting on her lap, adoring her attention as she made funny faces and tickled him, giving him her full attention as she played with him. Loki watched her, she was similar with the child as she was with animals, kind and caring with a genuine smile on her face. He noted the absence of Sika once more and frowned. For a moment, his eye caught Lydia’s and she seemed to read his thoughts and indicated to the other room. Loki said nothing but his face said everything. Standing back slightly as Eoin spoke with his sister, he became still.

Loki left his doppelganger in the room with Clodagh and his family and teleported himself into the other room, there he saw King Sika sitting looking out at Asgard. The king seemed to realise he was no longer alone and looked around, frowning to Loki. ‘You brought her back.’

‘Yes.’

‘Thank goodness.’ it was clear from Sika’s tone and features that he was relieved, but still, he remains in a separate room, away from her.

‘I need to ask why you do this.’ Loki stated, walking forward. ‘Clodagh is so incredible, so kind and good and you clearly know this yet you treat her as though she is a pariah.’

‘She is not…’

‘Of course she isn’t, hence you being in here and not out there talking to her, reassuring her that what was said to her yesterday is nothing but lies and envy, and of course, you were so forthcoming with defending her when Laura verbally attacked her and called her a…’

‘Don’t.’ Sika begged. ‘Don’t call her that word.’

‘When you say nothing against those that call her it, you condone her being called it. You acting as though she does not exist until my mother brought her here tells people she is only something to be gossiped about.’ Loki stated. ‘You claim to hate that word but do you know Clodagh calls herself that, she hates how she came to be so much she thinks that it is an apt term for her.’ Sika swallowed shamefully. ‘You are the reason she cannot accept herself, the way you act regarding her…’

‘Lydia…’

‘Queen Lydia adores her, Lydia wants to be recognised as her stepmother and accept her into your house but she cannot because Clodagh is your daughter biologically and as a result, only you can start the process. Your sons maintain she and Amelia should have been raised as twins and no one be allowed to know the truth.’ Loki informed him. ‘You are so busy worrying about insulting Lydia, who has long accepted all of this that you have done nothing but insult Clodagh, making her feel as though she is not worthy.’

‘It was all my fault, I…’

‘You have her thinking it is hers, you do know that? It’s odd, my father tells me of the valiant manner you fought the Tridiens, yet the man I see before is frightened to love his daughter. How do you think she feels when she sees you love your other children, how do you think that feels? Do you know her, do you know how beautiful and pure she is? You think her filthy and sordid, yet she is as pure as the freshest snow, but how could you know, you refuse to get to know her.’

Sika looked sadly at the door, knowing that in the room on the other side, his daughter along with his wife and other children, sat in the room and thought of Loki’s words. ‘You care for her?’

‘I do.’ Loki confirmed.

[petertheparkers]

proof

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Prompt: Reader is the child of Tony Stark. While talking to Peter one day you discover that Flash is bullying him, and decide to take matters into your own hands by showing up to Liz Allen’s party to put an end to it. 

Requested by: n/a

Warnings: slight spoilers for Homecoming, mild swearing, bullying

Word count: 2,805

Notes: I know this isn’t the exact dialogue as in the movie but I’m just working off my memory so bare with me folks. Also this took me several day to write but I love it, even though the ending is kinda shaky but this is very long and I would enjoy you guys sent in requests! My masterlist is in my bio (it’s almost empty but that’ll change) along with a prompt list you can request off of if you want!

If asked, most high school students would say that math is their least favorite subject. But for teenage genius Peter Parker, gym was the one class he truly loathed. Of course, it all got easier once he got bitten by the spider and gained super abilities, but he had to keep it in check as a way to avoid suspicion. 

But as he laid on the sweaty mat talking with Ned about how he just could not believe that he was Spider-Man, he did the exact opposite of avoiding suspicion. 

“Peter knows Spider-Man!” Ned blurted as a result of overhearing Liz Allen talk about how cool she thought the masked super-hero was. All eyes turned to Peter and he wanted nothing more than to shrivel up into a ball and die. He glared momentarily at Ned, before jumping to his feet and taking a few steps towards Liz and her group of friends sitting on the bottom rows of the bleachers. 

“You know Spider-Man?” Liz asked before Peter could even think about stuttering out a response. Peter knew all eyes were on him without even looking around. 

Damn it, Ned. He cursed in his head. Why did you have to yell so loud?

“I mean, kinda?” It came out more as a question. It made sense that he sounded so confused, he didn’t know what to say. Technically, he did know Spider-Man. But telling everyone that he did felt like he was abusing the privilege of being Spider-Man. A battle between his two options waged inside his head until his next sentence just tumbled out of his lips. “Yeah, I’ve actually met him a few times during the Stark Internship.”

“Right, and I’m sure you know (Y/n) Stark, too.” Flash teased sarcastically as he sauntered his way over. Peter rolled his eyes, Flash was the last person he wanted in the room. His arrogant demeanor made him want to say that yeah, he did know (Y/n). And yeah, they were on a first name basis, friends even. But he elected to keep his mouth tightly shut. Besides, Ned was doing enough talking for the both of them. 

“Yeah, Peter is friends with Spider-Man. (Y/n), too.” Ned announced and all heads shot to him once again. Flash laughed sarcastically and Peter visibly grimaced. 

“If you’re such good friends with them, invite them to Liz’s party.” Flash grinned as he taunted him. Peter’s eyes darted to Liz, who had until this point watched the conversation with a small frown on her face. 

“I’m having a party at my house this weekend. You and Ned are welcome to come, if you want.” Liz spoke up. Peter nodded his head, disbelief that he was actually being invited to Liz Allen’s party. Suddenly, the bell rang and ended Peter’s torment. 

You sat alone on the couch in the Avengers Facility while a movie you’d seen a thousand times droned on in the background. Things had definitely changed since the Civil War between the Avengers. Your dad was rarely around, Natasha had moved to the Barton farm to help out with Laura and Clint’s kids, Rhodey spent almost all his time in physical therapy, and all Vision did was mope around about Wanda. You couldn’t even bare to think about what happened to the other half of the Avengers. The other half of your family. 

As if a switch had been flicked inside you, your blank stare on the television broke. 

“FRIDAY, who’s currently in the building?” You asked. You wouldn’t let yourself sit in sadness any longer, and bothering whoever was in the building seemed like the best distraction.

“I believe Mr. Parker is in training room three.” FRIDAY responded, the automated voice seemingly coming from thin air. You thanked the AI as you climbed off the couch, desperate to entertain yourself somehow. Besides, watching Peter Parker workout seemed like a perfect way to busy yourself. 

As you padded barefoot down the halls, you let your mind wander to thoughts about Peter. You met him a few days after the events of Civil War—which was just over two months ago—and you swore you never met anyone more adorable. Not only was he the perfect gentleman, but you were left awestruck by how smart he was. Since then, the two of you hung out occasionally when he stopped by the facility from time to time. You didn’t spend enough time with him to know him really well, but just enough to develop feelings for him. 

Yes. You had a tiny crush on Peter.

“Parker—” You began as you threw open the door to the training room. But, you cut your declaration of boredom off as your gaze trained on the glorious sight before you. Peter Parker was lifting weights, shirtless. You couldn’t believe your luck. You knew the boy had muscles, but damn.

“(Y/n)?” Peter questioned your slack-jawed expression as you stood speechless in the doorway. You didn’t know what had come over you, but you soon recovered and made your way over and sat on one of the benches. 

“Parker, I’m really bored.” You acted as if you hadn’t been openly checking him out moments before. He gave you a confused look, setting the weights down before taking a seat on the bench next to you. 

“I really need a favor from you.” Peter blurted, changing the subject to something that would start a conversation. You shifted slightly in your seat to get a better look a him, an expectant look resided on your face that urged him to continue. “Ned told some people at my school that I know Spider-Man and you, but this guy named Flash doesn’t believe me so he said I should invite you to Liz’s party so I can prove that I know you.” Peter explained in one, very long, sentence. “So I would really appreciate it if you showed up at the party tomorrow and told him we’re friends.” After moment of trying to understand what he said, a small frown formed from confusion etched its way onto your face. 

“Why doesn’t he believe you? I mean, the Spider-Man part, sure, but he knows you ‘intern’ here, right?” You questioned as you turned your body slightly to face him. Peter stared straight ahead and shrugged his shoulders.

“He’s just kind of a dick, y’know?” He mumbled out after a moment. Your brows tugged together in confusion as you realized why he wanted you to go to the party. 

“If you wanted me to show up and prove him wrong, you’re gonna have to explain to me why you want me to shut him up so bad.” You stated as you turned fully in your spot, crossing your legs up on the bench in order to give him your full attention. Peter shrugged again, bringing a hand up to run through his hair which had become a mess of unruly curls from his earlier workout. You reached out your hand to place it on his forearm and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “You can tell me, Peter. We’re friends. Besides, who am I going to tell? Dum-E?” You joked, referencing your dad’s robot that had good intentions, but sometimes went awry. Peter seemed to loosen up after you said that, and he sighed deeply with a hint of a smile on his face. 

“Flash thinks I’m a loser who is lying about the Stark Internship—”

“You kinda are.” You cut him off with a smile on your face before you could help it. “Sorry, continue.” You urged him on sheepishly. 

“Flash is just this arrogant jerk who thinks he’s better than me—he’s not, but he never shuts up about it.” Peter continued, mumbling something after that you didn’t catch at the end. 

“What’d you say? That last part, I couldn’t hear you.” You asked him to clarify. By the red tint on his cheeks and the fact that his gaze wouldn’t leave his hands sitting in his lap, you could tell it was embarrassing. 

“He calls me Penis Parker.” He mumbled again with his head hung low, but this time you caught what he said. You would’ve laughed at the nickname, but since it was coming from a guy Peter did not like, it only made you upset. Anger started to course through you, and Peter, who finally met your stare, noticed. “Hey, it doesn’t really matter. I know he’s just and idiot and—”

“I’ll be there, and I’ll make sure Flash gets what’s coming to him.” You didn’t know what came over you, but a sudden urge to defend Peter—the boy who routinely risked his life to stop muggers and help the people of Queens—overcame you. A smile overtook Peter’s features, and you knew in the deepest part of your heart, you had it bad for Peter Parker.

“Hey, dad.” You spoke into your phone as you updated him on your plans for the evening. You sat in the backseat of one of your dad’s self-driven cars moments away from arriving at Liz Allen’s house. Peter had texted you saying he and Ned had just walked into the party and already people had questioned him as to where you and Spider-Man were. “I’m going to a party tonight, Peter invited me.”

“Parker? Tell him to keep his hands to himself.” Your dad scoffed and a blush began to find its way onto your face.

“It’s not like that. It’s not a date—” 

“You mean Parker hasn’t asked you out yet?” Your dad cut you off, his tone laced with confusion. 

“Yeah, and—” You paused, recognizing something off with his word choice. “What do you mean, yet?” You questioned, earning a sigh as a response from your dad. 

“Wow, my child is oblivious. Watch the link I sent you and don’t stay out too late but don’t come home too early like a wuss.” And with that, your dad hung up.

“Anthony Edward Stark—!” You huffed out in annoyance as you lost connection with your father. You rolled your eyes, tapping on your messages to watch the video your dad sent you.

He took this video yesterday, kid.

As you tapped on the video attached to your dad’s text, the image of Peter wearing the Spider-Man mask and his pajamas standing in front of his mirror appeared. You stifled a laugh at his outfit, but even seeing him in a video made your heart race. And that was before he started talking. 

“Hey, (Y/n), I was wondering if you maybe—no, come on Peter that’s lame.” In the mirror, Peter straightened his posture before the eyes narrowed on the mask. “(Y/n). Hello. You. Me. Friday. No, the day of the week, not the AI.” At the start, Peter had lowered his voice a few octaves to what you assumed to be his ‘sexy’ tone, but it went back up to his slightly pitched voice as he tried to fix his mistake. You couldn’t tell if your cheeks were red because of how hard you were laughing or that he was practicing talking to you in the mirror. “Forget it. (Y/n), do you wanna go see the movies with me—I-I mean a movie. Unless you want to have a movie marathon with me, that’d be cool.” He groaned slapping his palm against his forehead in frustration. “C’mon, Spider-Man, it can’t be that hard to ask her on a date.” After that, the video cut out as Peter ripped the mask off. 

You felt the car stop, and when you looked out the window you barely noticed the beautiful suburban house as your thoughts ran wild with the new information the video gave you. Peter liked you, that was for sure. And he tried to find a way to ask you out, which sent a jolt of excitement down your spine. 

As you stepped out of the car, dozens of people stopped to gape at your presence. You didn’t go to Midtown and since no one believe Peter actually knew you, no one had expected you to show up. You stepped into the large house, admiring the nice interior. Once you got across the threshold, you asked the closest person where Peter was. 

“Over there. I hate your dad, by the way. M’name’s Michelle.” The girl offered, gesturing with the toast in her hand towards the living room.

“Oh... kay?” You responded, utter confusion written across your face. You follow the direction of her toast, noticing Peter soon after. Apparently, he had noticed you earlier as he watched you walk towards him with a large, goofy grin on his face. His expression made your heart speed up and you wonder how anyone could ever be mean to him. 

Next to him, another boy in a hat stared between you and Peter, grinning like a madman. You assumed him to be Ned, Peter’s best friend that he often talked about—and the only person outside of you and the Avengers who knew about his alter-ego.

“Hey Peter! What’s up, Ned?” You called, knowing everyone’s attention was on you. When you got closer to the boys, you lowered your voice so no one could hear you besides Ned and Peter. “Where’s Flash? I want to punch him.” You half-joked, earning nervous laughs from both of them.

“I cannot believe you know my name!” Ned gushed and you laughed, elbowing Peter in the side to gesture to him. Now that you knew he had feelings for you, you knew you had to make a move. And you knew exactly what you were going to do—you just needed to find one stupidly named bully first.

“I should, this guy talks about you enough.” You laugh, but cut yourself off when the smiles disappeared off of Ned and Peter’s faces.

“(Y/n)! Glad you could make it, what’re you doing with Penis Parker when the real party is over there.” A voice butted into the conversation. Your eyes landed on  boy wearing two shirts, both with a popped collar as he jutted his thumb in the direction of the DJ’s booth. You forced a smile on your face, but anyone with eyes could tell it was fake.

“You must be Eugene!” You called sarcastically, using his real name. Once Peter had left the tower the day before, you had used your dad’s software to do a little research on him. A shock looked registered on everyone’s face, but a laugh erupted from Ned. You turned slightly, watching Peter not even try to hid the grin on his face. 

“Wha—?” Flash began but you held up a finger, gesturing for him to shut up. By now, people from other rooms had come in to watch once word had spread through the house that you were confronting Midtown’s most arrogant.

“I’d like to start off by saying, you’re an ass. Peter is—by far—the greatest guy I’ve ever met. Calling him ‘Penis Parker’ makes you seem five years old. So, while you’re out there driving daddy’s car, Peter is working his ass off trying to better himself and his future. Which is why I would never hang out with someone like you. So here I am, proof that Peter actually knows me and is a better person than you.” You finished your rant and, before you lost all your worked up courage, you turned around and planted your lips onto Peter’s.

Gasps were heard around the room, followed by people calling out, ‘Get it, Parker!’. All of which, though, fell deaf on your ears as Peter unfroze and returned the kiss. 

In a word, kissing Peter was spectacular. Both of you had no idea what you were really doing, but there were so many pent up emotions behind the kiss that it was a little overwhelming. His hands went to your waist to steady you close to him and you clasped your hands at the back of his neck. You pulled away slightly, leaving only centimeters between the two of you. You smiled at the large and giddy grin spread across Peter’s face as he looked down at you.

“Since you practiced so much in the mirror, I was wondering if you would ask me on a date sometime.” You whispered, relishing in the moment as his minty breath fanned across your face. Embarrassment registered on his face and he opened his mouth to question how you knew but you quickly pecked his lips before he could.

“Uhm... would you wanna... go to the movies with me... sometime?” Peter muttered out, his eyes darting around the room. You laughed, nodding your head.

“Peter, I just kissed you in front of this entire party. I like you, a lot, so you don’t have to be nervous with me.” You chuckled at his stiff and awkward demeanor, taking a step back and grabbed his hand. “Now, come dance with me.”

[the-e4b]

THE FOLLOWING RESPONSE POST IS VERY OLD: IT HAS BEEN IN THE DRAFTS FOR A LONG WHILE. IT IS POSTED TODAY BECAUSE DISNEYMASTER IS STILL SEEKING ATTENTION SO HE WILL GET ATTENTION.

Continuing on from this post because DM has managed to totally miss the point of our replies and make up something entirely different.

1. We are not pretending our fandom isn’t filled with Men Rights Activist, Alt-righters and corporate yes men. Because, guess what? That’s not the focus of our blog. The focus of our blog is bronies (like yourself) who make an ass out of themselves or try to look smart but in the end look like nothing less than the end of a donkey’s ass. None of us CARE about politics in the slightest, we only care about a show about pastel talking horses to escape our shitty lives.

2. We will immediately give dear Peet every ounce of respect once he starts to own up to it. What he does now is make fun of transgenders, feminists, bronies, weeboos, professional writers and everything that goes against atleast one of his policies. No one respects him but his faithful herd of cockroaches.

3. There’s a difference between pointing out flaws in a character and obsessing and hating over every trait they have and show in an episode. But, I shouldn’t try to explain that to someone who obsesses over a character getting wings and character growth…

4. Bit too late on that “blackmailing us over to Peet”. Every one of us is already blocked by Jerry and already knows our dirty laundry and absolutely doesn’t care about it. And he will certainly not care about what a pathetic little shit like you has to say.

5. This point I’m not even gonna argue with. If you really want to go as far as to call a CHILDREN’S show sexist then you’re way past the point of no return. You’re taking a show for little kids WAY too serious, even by our standards. And BTW, Rotten Tomatoes’ opinion doesn’t mean shit if the movie made it’s money back with even more to add to this day. As we speak MLP:the movie has broken 50 million dollars in the box office with still a lot of theaters to hit and the DVD and Blu-ray still to come out. One small thing doesn’t seem like a lot, but soon one small thing leads to more and soon one small thing can be the biggest thing of all.

YOU, Disneymaster, are one of those vocal minorities who think that the show is full of “right wing/centralist corporate bs”. How about you just sit back and enjoy a good series like Ducktales or watch reruns of the good ol days of MLP. That’s still 52 episode where you can just shut your yap and enjoy blandness and the glory days of Queen and Empress Faust.

- Space Mare

PS. Still can’t believe you haven’t found out who I am yet.

I find it hard to believe that this poor soul is still trying to start more issues with us because we still exist and continue to oppose the most toxic people in the community. It doesn’t matter which way they lean politically, scum is scum. Al Franken and Roy Moore sit on each side of the political spectrum, both of them are dirty abusers, deserving to rot in a prison cell for the harm they caused others

I do not know why DM insists on white knighting on behalf of someone who actually despises that part of the fanbase that threw a giant tantrum many moons ago over Twilight Sparkle’s wings. It’s like how Ephrom continues to track down Peet’s enemies, despite senpai not giving a rat’s ass about him.

Also, It’s funny how DisneyMaster feels like he can act like an asshole again despite apologizing for his actions towards the fanbase. After that, we closed the book on the Anticorns as most of them were willing to acknowledge their faults and move on. DisneyMaster tried the moral high ground approach with us and even tried to use blackmail to try and get us to remove his Encyclopedia Dramatica page (which we had no hand in despite what his paranoia would tell him) and our previous screencaps.

He also tried to shine the spotlight on the things that we have done, as Space Mare said… Peet doesn’t care and no one else cares about what you have to say. Everyone had a phase where they were reckless and pious in their beliefs. You wanted to be a hero, you fought for something you believed was noble but you were shortsighted by the part of the fanbase that wanted to wait and see where the show was going before jumping to conclusions. At some points, we wanted to make a difference, we all wanted to interact with others, beg for free art and contribute to many collaborative stories… however because of the ambiguity of text, everyone’s true feelings are masked. I don’t remember everyone I annoyed but I moved on and worked to improve. The Book of Five Rings says that the path of self improvement is a neverending cycle.

I say this because humans are social creatures and making a good first impression is the first step to building a strong bond. The point is to grow from the mistakes and move on. We’ve moved on from you, DM… why can’t you do the same?

-JoJo

To finally relieve some inner anger I’ve been feeling because Disneymaster is an obnoxious parasite that doesn’t know when to fade into a pit of nothing or won’t fucking back off and leave us alone..I’m gonna speak myself with this Linkara:

You are the most annoying, self entitled, obnoxious and downright most self important scumfuck that I have EVER fucking come across when it comes to any fandom.

AND THAT IS SAYING A LOT.

You constantly seek to complain about certain things the MLP fandom as if that’s ALL the fandom consists off. As Saturn states, E4B is not on THAT type of garbage because we aren’t INTERESTED in it, we discuss and criticize the people who make the fandom look poor or make complete ass out of themselves and come off a arrogant and think they know more in regards to a show about multicolored horses.YOU’RE the one constantly seeking the negative traits and screech the almighty heavens how “TEH BRONIEZ FANDOM IZ BAD CAUSE THIS AND THAT”.

And then we come to my favorite one:

SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. OVER. THE MISGENDERING. SHIT.

We’ve stated this and stated THIS AGAIN:

The reasons we REFUSE to call Jerry “Lily” ISN’T because we have something against transgenders, hell we have transgender friends. One of the bands I’m a fan of has a transgender leader (And just so you can get it through your fucking obnoxious skull, the person in question is Laura Jane Grace of Against Me, who came out as a transgender in 2012 and even wrote an album about her struggles with gender dysphoria). The reasons we don’t call Jerry by their preferred name is because not only does Jerry show no respect to not only ex friends who dared disagree with him on certain things, no respect to his family, no respect to his own colleagues of the fandom, no respect to other fandoms,or even his fans…

He has no respect TRANSGENDERS, he even infamously snarked and attacked a transgendered individual who called out his garbage.

How do we (myself especially) respect someone who does THAT?!

Or what, does that not fit your stupid political leanings or for your SJW tendancies?

“OH YOU SHOULDN’T BE COMPLAINING OVER RINGTEAM CRITICZING CHARACTER TRAAAAITS”.

Have you looked in the mirror Mr. I-Hate-MLP-Because-Twilight-Got-Wings-And-Said-Meghan-McCarthy-Should-Be-Beaten?

“DURRRRR BE GLAD I HAVEN’T TATTLETAILED ON YOU GUYS TO JERRY WAAAH”

Jerry knows about the blog’s existence and has both shown little to no interest and even when he did, he gave the usual bitch rant he always gives towards people who call out his shit:

Obligatory insults that involve “transphobic” and “Nazi”.

Also, “MLP Sexist”. Oh sure, Gen 4 is totally sexist. A generation created by a feminist with the idea of making the show towards a general audience is “sexist”.

Do you ever fucking hear yourself, or do you love the sound of your voice that you jerk to it?

But then again, this is the same asshole who took his niece’s plushie away and has no regret over it and has even show depression over a fucking children’s show involving multicolored horses, all while screeching pity about how “nobody likes him” despite the fact he himself is his own downfall by constantly bitching at fans of the show and even comparing them to Donald Trump supporters.

Clearly we’re the bad guys compared to the guy whining about colored horse butts for about four years.

As Saturn stated, while critical reception for the movie was just mixed, it was a financial success, getting a total of $51 million at the box office and even then, it did good for it’s opening week with $21.9 million in the US and Canada. That’s ESPECIALLY impressive considering BLADE RUNNER 2049 (and by an extent, the romnatic survival film The Mountain Between Us) came out ON THE SAME DAY. Not to mention the 2017 adaptation of IT was still in theaters.

At the end of the day DM, You’re nothing but an obnoxious, annoying, and downright tumorous parasite that doesn’t know when to fuck off and leave us alone, let alone the fandom.

You really wanna know why people give you shit?

BECAUSE YOU FUCKING MAKE THEM DO IT. 

YOU FUCKING SPEW POLITICAL GARBAGE OVER A CHILDREN’S SHOW, ATTACK FANS OVER SIMPLY ENJOYING THE SHOW THEY’VE GROWN TO LOVE, AND DOWNRIGHT CONSTANTLY THINK YOU’RE IN THE FUCKING RIGHT EVERY TIME. 

Heck, one of your fucking DA Tags was “Disneymaster is always right”. You cry fucking pity every time because you hate how people snark at you, but then you do stupid shit like accuse a show created by FEMINIST, let alone a toy line targeted to a certain demographic of “being sexist”.

I would say take responsibility for your shitty actions, but the one time you did, you backed out f it because “WAAAAAAAH E4B ARE SAYING SHIT I DON’T LIIIKE”. Like you STILL keep doing because you can’t let shit fucking go.

Do everyone a fucking favor: Do something with your sad fucking life.

But chances are, you’ll disregard everything we’ve said because nobody else is right but you.

You fucking are sad and borderline unstable.

- deafpony.

I love how right there you admit you don’t care about what the SU fandom did, because they agree with your opinions.

Those extremest you think are all over the MLP community? They are often called out and are despised but the fandom at large. Like you.

 Unlike SU, which has no problems harassing artists and staff members over petty shit because you sad losers think you’re heroes living in a crappy Young Adult novel.

“ROTTEN TOMATOS SAID MOVIE BAD ME RIGHT!!!!!!”

Who the fuck cares about what the same site that bashed A Cure for Wellness, one of the most unique horror movies of 2017? The movie still made a mint anyway. Bet you’re one of those types who freaked out because Ghostbusters 2016 flopped.

Because you’re the worst type of fan, Dumpy. You don’t care about the story, or characters, or animation, you care about how “progressive” it is. I bet that’s why you like that blander than white bread Season 1 of MLP, because Faust’s name was on it. Nothing more.

Go do something productive with your sad life. Or screech about a blog that hasn’t said a word about you again. That’s a victory for Social Justice!

[swiftsgetawaycar]

NATIONAL PUMPKIN DAY FT. TAYLOR SWIFT’S PUMPKIN PATCH

So, apparently it’s national Pumpkin Day and in honour of that (and RFI’s MV coming out later one) I wanted to do The Pumpkins™ Explanation & Appreciation post. Starting noowwwwwwwww….!!

Okay, well, a while ago now, I was going about my daily Tumblr routine of reflagging and liking posts related to Her Majesty Queen @taylorswift when I stumbled upon a post about it be autumn and Red (2012) season. Being my fall-loving self, I reblogged the post with a comment and it then turned into something way bigger than mere Red appreciation. @spoookyswift whose post it was, messaged me and we very swiftly (wink wink) became friends. (Flora is my amazing pumpkin mama but we’ll come onto that in a bit!) She told me that she had just made a group chat and asked if I wanted to join, I jumped at the opportunity because I didn’t really have many swiftie friends, and after an annoying process trying to get a group me account, I was in!

Not long after I joined, we decided we needed a better name than “the group chat” because that’s not catchy at all and our girl @taylorswift would not appreciate our hook-less existence so we started talking about names and for a while it looking like it’d be #justiceformeredeth or 80% Gay Swifties (which we all still think is relevant tbh ahah) but THEN because we’re the people we are, we got into a heated discussion about whether The Nightmare before Christmas is indeed a Christmas movie or rather a halloween movie, our division led to Flora (our fearless leader) casually typing in “controversial pumpkins” and THAT WAS THE MOMENT I KNEW and I said “OMG THATS IT”. Then there were multiple more polls for voting on a name, my favourite of them all being ‘the gay pumpkins Meredith disapproved of, until we settled almost unanimously (there was one controversial pumpkin who voted against the name) on the Controversial Pumpkins™. Thus, the Pumpkin Patch was born and the 10 of us at the time quickly threw around “pumpkin” like Taylor uses “dude”.  So that’s how we got the name, but what the patch is and always has been even since it’s nameless days with only Meredith as our icon pic (what? It’s an ICONIC PICTURE OF MEREDITH!) is a place of love, joy and all-round positive vibes. It’s somewhere where we all can share stuff about ourselves free of judgement, a place where we can get advice about sticky situations we’ve stumbled into, somewhere safe enough for us to be honest and to know that there is a whole bunch of people with nothing but love and support for us. Yet, it’s also a place of endless joking around, meme-sharing and boy-hating. It’s a family of people from all across this crazy world who came together because of Taylor Alison Swift but have stayed together because of each other. I am so SO lucky to have these amazing people in my life, they bring me so much happiness and joy every single day and I have no clue what I’d do without them. In short, @spoookyswift, we owe you big time for choosing us to be a part of the secret session that is The Pumpkins™. Speaking of Flora……

Flora // @spoookyswift

My darling Flora, where do I even begin? Oh, wait, I know, with that time WE WERE BOTH IN TAYLOR SWIFT’S FUCKING LIVING ROOM LISTENING TO REPUTATION AND EATING COOKIES AND WE DID NOT KNOW WE WERE BOTH FUCKING THERE BECAUSE WE KEPT IT SO SECRET AND WERE STUPID PUMPKINS AND SO I’VE NEVER GOTTEN TO HUG YOUR PUMPKIN ASS?!?!?! (Yeah, I’m not still bitter or anything hhahahahhah) No, but seriously, you’re Mama Pumpkin and we have you to thank for The Pumpkins™, I will be forever grateful that you picked me to be a part of the patch and that ever since you’ve been the greatest friend a girl could ask for! You’re my snake buddy although you’re convinced you’re a bean we both know you’re just as snakes as I am!! YOUR TAYLOR’S PUMPKIN BITCH WHICH MAKES ME EXPLODE WITH JOY AS WELL AS KIND OF WANT TO HURT YOU BUT DW I WOULD NEVER! My weird heart loves you weird heart forever 💖

Ceci // @cats-and-wildest-dreams

CECI, YOU ARE THE LITERAL CUTEST! You went away for like 24hrs and I almost died from missing you!!! You are an absolutely GORGEOUS pumpkin and make me smile so hard on a regular basis. I know you think that Tay will never notice you but I promise that she loves you just as much as I do and you’ll get your moment with her even if I have to fly to Nashville myself and speak to Taylor Nation!!

Megan //  @sweetteaswift

My first memory of Megan is when she was chasing down a UPS truck in her Speak Now t-shirt to get a photo with it because it had Reputation on the side and my snap chatting her from the library where I was supposed to be studying advising her on how to get the girl the perfect shot. I think that basically describes our relationship since. Although, she’s the only pumpkin who has appreciated my dogs and I’m still waiting for her to get her Pumpkin butt on a plane to meet them!  SHE IS THE EXTRA PUMPKIN!

Nikki // @greysswifts

NIKKI IS MY GAY ASS AUNT AND IM NOT EVEN CLOSE TO SAD ABOUT IT!! Seriously, Nikki is our resident LGBT Pumpkin Queen and is always up for dragging boys like Taylor does in her songs, unapologetically and with all the dignity in the world. SHE HAS THE VOICE OF AN ANGEL and always brightens up the Pumpkin Patch. AND I WANT HER HANDLE COZ DAMN IT’S COOL! In short, I stan Nikki!

Aislinn // @theyhaventyet

Our lovely Canadian Pumpkin, Aislinn, WAS THE ORIGINAL CONTROVERSIAL PUMPKIN, I REPAT THE OG CONTROVERSIAL PUMPKIN WAS AISLINN!!!!! The first thing that comes to mind when I think of her is Thanksgiving and me talking to her about it because I LOVE CANADA and my boarding school experience happened there and that’s about me not her so back to Aislinn WHO IS THE BEST AND I LOVE HER SO MUCH AND I WIL FIGHT ANYONE WHO HURTS HER PURE LITTLE CLOUD OF JOY ASS!

Ozge // @wildestgiraffe

OZGE! MY TURKISH PUMPKIN FLOWER BUTTON BALL OF POSITIVITY AND JOY! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND YOU’RE SO SWEET TO ALL OF US AND YOU MAKE THE PATCH SUCH A BEAUTIFUL PLACE TO BE A PART OF AND I KNOW THIS IS ALL IN CAPS WITH NO PUNCTUATION BUT I JUST AM EXPLODING WITH LOVE FOR YOU!

Yolanda // @sadbeautifultragicswift

This genius invented the Speak Now Pumpkin™ karaoke challenge which has blessed us with so much pure happiness and the cutest and most gorgeous voices ever so THANK YOU GENIUS GODESS FOR THAT! You’re always so incredibly lovely to all of us and I appreciate that more than you know! ALSO, YOU KNOW LIKE EVERYTHING and I love your messages because they make me laugh as well as feel inadequate for having the memory of a donut! AND YOU ARE THE CALENDAR PUMPKIN AND WE APPRECIATE YOUR SERVICE FOR OUR COUNTRY!! I still laugh over how you didn’t realise I went to the SS and told me I “DIED DED” LOVE YOU - DON’T EVER CHANGE OKAY?!?!

Katie // @these-sick-beats

You are the cutest and I love you like a lot and thank you for being such a supportive and wonderful pumpkin! Although we haven’t chatted much you’ve been nothing but nice and you’ve kept secret my secret if you know what I mean!

Janessa // @fifth-harmony

Although you stan not just Queen Taylor, you’re a swift through and through! YOU ARE SO FUNNY AND KIND AND WE MISS YOU ON THE CHAT COME BACK BE (T)HERE!!

Julia // @fragileswiftie13

JULIA BLESS YOUR CONTROVERSIAL PUMPKIN HEART!! You’re amazing drawings for whatever-the-fuck-science-of-cells-is-called class started the whole donuts vs nuclei debate which I am happy to report ended in a CLEAR victory for donuts (or as Flora says Dough-nuts) but seriously, you’re such an amazing person who I’m lucky to have met, YOU LOOK GORGEOUS WITH YOUR BRACES ON I’LL PUNCH WHOEVER SAYS DIFFERENT! Please don’t ever forget how wonderful you are!!

Laura // @swiftslastkiss

FIRSTLY YOUR PIC WITH TAYLOR IS THE ABSOLUTE GREATEST TO EVER EXIST YOU LUCKY PUMPKIN!!! You’re such an incredible friend and your heart is pure goodness and I cannot wait for the day I get to hug you because you’re the best and the Patch would not be the same without you, you make us all better pumpkins!

Lina // @confesswift

THE VIOLENT PUMPKIN OF THE PATCH AND THE

Sarah // @thatwasthenightthingschanged

GERMAN PUMPKIN, you sent the funniest messages and your Red poll was iconic! Not to mention how GORGEOUS of a person you are inside and out! Also, you’re my name twin pumpkin because although I’m Sara (SAH-RA) people call me Sarah so much it may as well be my name aha!  you dragging

Sammy // @theswiftreputation

Steve Irwin Pumpkin, I’m so glad I met your Aussie pumpkin ass - we’ll have to become Roos on January 26th ahah and show the Patch a real party!!  YOU ARE AN AMAZING BEAUTIFUL PUMPKIN WHO DESERVES ALL THE GOOD IN THE WORLD AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!! YOUR LITTLE LAMBY IS THE CUTEST EVER I JUST WANNA SNUGLLE UP WITH HER!! All my fingers are crossed that your march order gets to you problem free aha

Talia // @locketswifts

TALIA BABE YOU’RE AMAZING AND I CANNOT THANK YOU ENOUGH FOR BEING YOUR BEAUTIFUL PUMPKIN SELF! I LOVE YOU - ENOUGH SAID! 

Safira // @acciothirteen

I’m so relieved you’re NOT a kiwi despite living in NZ otherwise there would’ve been some interesting sport related convos aha! BUT the minute your username came up in conversation I knew I’d like you and you haven’t proven me wrong! You’re sure sweet and smart and I LOVE HAVING YOU IN THE PACTH KIDDO!

Emily // @enchanteds

FAMOUS KERMIT GIRL TURNED INTO PUMPKIN YOU’VE BEEN IN THE CHAT FOR LIKE 3 DAYS AND I ALREADY ADORE YOU AND THINK YOU’RE THE BEST PERSON EVER! LONG LIVE YOUR KERMIT MEMES AND YOUR INCREDIBLE ICON

Dacia // @fifteenmp3

YOU ARE ALSO NEW BUT FABULOUS! YOU’VE MADE ME SMILE SO MUCH OVER THE PAST FEW DAYS, YOU FIT INTO THE PATCH PERFECTLY, IT’S LIKE YOU’VE ALWAYS BEEN A PUMPKIN AND WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH! Thank you for existing!

Morgan // @teylors

ANOTHER NEW PUMPKIN WHO I LOVE AND WHO LOVES TREE!! YOU ARE ALSO FAMOUS TUMBLR THAT WE TRIED REALLY HARD TO ACT COOL FOR AND I’M SURE BY NOW YOU’VE REALISED ‘COOL’ ISN’T HOW MOST PEOPLE WOULD DESCRIBE US BUT WE’RE ALL COOL ASS PUMPKINS IN THE PATCH! YOUR KERMIT POSTS ALSO MAKE MY DAY AND I’M GLAD THAT YOU AND EMILY PROVIDE A LITTLE GREEN AMONGST ALL THE ORANGE!

Okay, I think that’s the whole patch and if not, I AM SO SORRY PUMPKIN I PROMISE IT’S NOT BECAUSE I DON’T LOVE AND APPRECIATE YOU MY BRAIN IS JUST NON-FUNCTIONING A LOT OF THE TIME!!!

In conclusion, seeing as this has turned into an essay, these people make my day every day. I am so very lucky to have them in my life and everytime I see I have notifications from our chat I automatically smile. MY HEART IS FULL OF LOVE FOR MY PUMPKINS - IMMA SLUT FOR ALL OF YOU!! So, dear Pumpkins, thank you so very much for these past few months and for allowing me somewhere to be understood, laughed with not at and loved for my weird and wild ways. I LOVE YOU GUYS. THANK YOU ALSO TO OUR QUEEN, LORD AND SAVIOUR @taylorswift FOR OWNING ALL OUR ASSES IN THE FIRST PLACE AND THUS MAKING US FAMILY!

14 DAYS TILL THE PUMPKINS DIE BUT HEY, RIGHT NOW WE’RE THE LUCKY ONES!

LOVE FROM ALL MY PUMPKIN HEART,

Sar xxx

[smols-n-tols]

What Are We?

👀👀👀Smols ‘N Tols is a cult network of writers and readers that happen to be of varying heights. This blog was originally created for us to reblog posts and writings for each other to enjoy and comment on, but then people started following the network,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,lmao.

So this is a belated welcome from all the admins of Smols ‘N Tols!

Speaking of the admins, here are all 13 of us along with a small description of who we are as written by admin Minhyun lmao.

(and me admin dandan <3)</p>

[I wanted to write things also!! so my stuff is in brackets -admin guanlin]

Admin Minhyun: @ukulelewrites: masterlist

ThIS GiRl OkAy she’s lITERALLY obsessed with Kim Donghan (I mean who isn’t have you sEEN hIm) and spreadsheets bc she’s organiZED AF. But in all seriousness she’s actually really sweet and although we all #expose her a lot she’s always there to keep us calm (somewhat) and we are actually able to get things done when she’s active in the group chat I mean Justine is the adult but Natty lowkey acts like the adult. Says she’s loyal to Donghan and Minhyun, BUT WE KNOW THE TRUTH. 

wYM???????????? ~ Admin Minhyun

dan dan the catman lover nat is 78.56% complete with her mission to convert the whole of smol-n-tols to spreadsheet enthusiasts

also wanted to write ‘gracefully shoved his tongue down her throat’ once???

swEATY lisTEN i really really really did NOT want to reference Mug’s smut reblog for that makeout scene, i had to work with what i knew about the topic,,,,which is absolutely nothing :-) ~ Admin Minhyun

[very sweet! she is the coolest kid at school with her robotics team hell yeah. really smart and r e a l l y beautiful wow I love a visual. we are both in our school’s a capella groups but im 100% sure nat’s school is better simply bc she is in it. nat writes very well pls read her stuff! I highly recommend scintilla i cried when reading it]

Admin Jihoon: @jihoonslattee: writes

Chiii is honestly the cuTEST PERSON EVER. Dance goddess. Probably jeojang’d her way into everyone in this network’s heart???? Loves Jihoon a lot.

[literally a ball of sunshine :) She is so energetic and has such a kind personality :’) honestly one of the nicest friends i’ve ever had. /thank you for being my friend chi i love/ chi also writes very well so pls check her out!]

Admin DanDan the Catman Daniel: @princess-megz

Mug is probably like, cast away on a piece of driftwood rn in the middle of the typhoon, but we’re pretty sure she’s alive. What’s a bias list lmao? Also pretty wild. Once reblogged smut to the network trying to help me have a reference for a make out fic,,,,,,,,,,,i will never see mug in the same light ever again,,,,,,,,, 

perfection condensed into a human = moo

also claims to be pure and innocent but 👀 👀 👀

[w i l d. I’m a lurker n every time meg is in the chat every one is there and something big is going on. basically the life of the party! if you want a visual of what she looks like, just imagine the cutest person ever and that’s meg]

Admin Jisung: @seungkwanslowqualityenglish: masterlist

Our mom, Justine is gr8. You think she’d be the responsible one,,,,nah, none of us are responsible. Drops knowledge on us 24/7.

[justine seems to know just about everything. she is the gc genius and resident mom. i never get to talk to her :( but she really is trust worthy and truly amazing. her whole blog is a1 though pls check her out]

Admin Seonho: @ladynightmareii

sNAZzy is our maknae lmao. Half the time she’s wildin’ with us, half the time she’s judging us.

she may be smol but she’s reaDY TO FIGHT

[a smol bb. seems to know more about life than i do, even though she is three years younger than me. i also never get to talk to her, but she is very energetic and unique in the best way possible]

Admin Jinyoung: @simplicitwannaone

How to Kill Laura 101 written by Natty: just write a makeout scene lmAO. tbh she’s wild. The type to help you figure out how to write a stripping scene. High-key a hoe™. Probably would give Donghyun a lap dance for free tbh. Wouldn’t put it past her.

wow an actual queen i love her so much i neED TO PROTECC wow words cant explain hOW AMAzinG this person is evERYTHING AND MORE ,,, also sends unnecessary shirtless daniel photos and thighgrabbing!ong all the time i wanna enD her but thank her bc did i save those photos or did they save me 

[very sweet :) she was one of the first people to talk to me when I joined the gc. lau is really one of a kind. she is so so so so so amazing that i really can’t describe in proper words. beautiful inside and out!]

Admin Daehwi: @dae-vil: masterlist

Dae posts some,,,,,,,,questionable things into the gc sometimes *war flashback to the woojin comment* Spams the gc w/ lots of unNECESSARY PICS OF DANIEL. She spams w/ pics of everyone and it’s gr8 bc now i have a couple options for my wallpaper.

[really chill and really cool. i don’t get to talk to her often, but most often her snaps are her chillin at home with her cat and tbh that’s the life. i really appreciate her!! she once wrote an imagine w all of the smols-n-tols members hidden in it and that was pretty cool]

Admin Guanlin: @wannaoone

Rachel is a lurker lmao. We love her loads tho but I only get to speak to her .5 times a week. Probably slaying everyone with her marching band.

[i’ll write for myself since nat was the only one to write one. i admit, im a lurker :( im sorry! im a senior in high school rn and im really busy 25/8 which gives me no time to respond in the chat as much as I like. everyone in the network is always so welcoming even when I don’t respond for a long time.... im really sorry guys, but i hope you read what i wrote for you and see how much u mean 2 me :’(((]

Admin Jaehwan: @kakaotaeks

Elena is a straight savage. We don’t see much of her nowadays but we still love her loads!

iconic quotes include: ‘twerk twerk twerk’, ‘that voice makes me want to get on my knees’ (reference: talking about an anime voice actor???), ‘we r on fe same twma’, ‘i would lowkey leave hyungseob for him’’, etc

101% confirmed by admin Minhyun, Elena will get on her knees for Ouran’s Hikaru Hitachiin’s voice,,,,or was it Kaoru????

[beautiful. i miss her a lot and hope she stops by again. truly a lovely person with an amazing personality.]

Admin Minki: @heochannies: masterlist

Meike is wiLD. Natty: “idk how to write angry make out scenes” Meike: “lmao, from experience,,,” All bow down to queen meike. Pops in every now and then but we love her nonetheless. Her eyebrows slay me 101/10 times a day.

[incredibly beautiful. she knows she looks good and uses it. i dont get to talk to her often, but i know she is very lively and kind. super supportive and awesome, literally the perfect person]

Admin Sungwoon: @imagineproduce101: masterlist

Carina,,,,,,,she’s the reason we’re here lmao. The gc is bc of her. Slays us all with her writing. AU’s on point all the time. I’m still shook about Hogwarts Donghan leT ME LIVE. When she’s not slaying us with her writings, she’s a vv sweet person and we love her loads not as much as she loves ong tho

[a queen. carina is beautiful inside and out. she is always killin it w debate. she is very understanding, especially since both of us are the same age n everything else. im very thankful for her, she truly is wonderful :) she also writes incredibly well so read her stuff holy shit it’s amazing. fun fact: i traveled to hk over the summer and before i left i opened chrome and saved her mafia au tag and left it open so when i was on the plane i could open chrome and read them again. im dead serious she is amazing]

Admin Woojin: @peachiejihoonie: writes

peachi is such a fucking cuTIEPIE??? Like 10/10 would flirt and she would barely notice lmao. you gotta be Friendship Level 999999999 to know anything about her. when I see she’s messaged the group chat I think of tol bois in pastel pink (I live for replay team 1) and honestly she’s??? so???? cute????? I cannot stress that enough. peachi is a straight savage™ Once jumped off a cliff and she was officially the coolest member in the gc. 

[beautiful! hot! cool! peachi is so awesome. her sense of style slays my entire life. knows how to look good and kills it omfg. peachi is very sweet and always brightens my day!! she is one of the few i /have/ a snap streak with and it’s always a blessin seeing her snaps. i love u peachi]

Anyways, that’s a quick rundown of the people running this mess lmao.