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powerfulkicks · 7 months ago

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*in a half fugue state* a discord server as an ever changing house

#house of leaves style #the very structure of the server changes #as in jokes are created #as people post more about certain topics #it's like a living thing #an ecosystem #but also a ruin and a relic #channels untouched #last messaged in years ago #pinned messages #jokes you can't remember the origin of #a living record of the life you lead during all that time #the server is a living thing in and of itself #messages from people you've parted ways with #bittersweet or just bitter #people you severed ties with or people who have just faded somewhere to the peripheries of your life #here you were. here is what you said then. this is what you were.#in a way it's almost more personal than a diary #this is how you behave with your friends your loved ones #doesn't that reveal more about you than anything you could say ever could?#an abandoned server on the other hand #empty and lifeless #husks of empty accounts #and memories tainted by the fact that all of it is gone now #so could it have really meant anything?#a discord as a house that is haunted #that is shaped by its occupants as much as its occupants are shaped by it #anyway sorry i'm really high right now and im fucked up on sci fi concepts #i could actually write something with this but it might be a bit intimidating #bc i'd want to do like a real project like an arg or something

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idolomantises · 5 months ago

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Just a random question to my artist followers: does anyone enjoy posting their stuff on tiktok? I can't tell if its just a me thing or if that app and its userbase are the most obnoxious compared to other social media

#txt #like any time i post something the comments are 10% related to the art #and then 50% is 'omg did you know this guy draws porn!!' and then LINKING THE FUCKING ACCOUNT #35% is someone complaining about gay people or women #and then the last 5% is someone yelling at me because they confused me with some other guy with a similar name/art style #ive also been sent genuine death threats over my dragon ball ship art. something i drew a YEAR ago #because tiktok's privacy policy is so bad that people can't dm you but they can still send message requests #is it because tiktok has a much younger userbase?#like we know how batshit twitter is and instagram is pretty annoying as well but tiktok feels like nobody knows what a filter is

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aquanutart · 4 months ago

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She is offering water to any lost travelers! However, it's so hot that the water has become tea, so she's adjusted accordingly!

#neopets #neotag #neoart #kiko #slorg #aquanutart #this was for a western themed beauty contest last year! it was very fun! :D i'm so happy we were able to be part of it!#and by 'very fun' i mean it's completely exhausting and i can only handle participating once or twice a year #but it is very exciting too! she gave tea to everyone who stopped by. she was very happy to be able to help so many visitors!#i actually forgot until i checked whether this was from one or two years ago... my sense of time as an adult is --- *waves hand vaguely*#i'm so sorry for all the messages i didn't answer. specifically to the user who sent me a really kind message out of the blue #about how they got the slugawoo avvie from my quiggle's lookup. i didn't even know you could get the avvie from his lookup #so i was very happy to find out!! and i was happy there might be more people getting the avvie from his lookup i didn't know about #and i wanted to tell them how absolutely happy it made me and my brain said ' you should respond to this right away or you won't do it'#and i thought you fool. of course i'll make sure to do something this important #and i kept thinking about it for the past year and thinking i will do it. i will do it #but when i thought about writing the words that were floating in my mind the whole time i would feel blocked #this happens all the time and i'm sorry. it really does make me so happy #and then they deleted all the neomails but thankfully i had it saved so i still was able to find their username and send a message thankyou #i'm very glad

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per-the-jellicle-magician · 1 month ago

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The theatre that put on Warsaw has a costume sale running, I was the only one who was digging though cats stuff and I've got some photos plus almost a whole Mistoffelees costume !!!!!!

Like the vest plus 2 shirts, 2 pairs of pants and 2 pairs of gloves!!!

Also got Tugger's gloves, Grizabella's tights and some photos XD

And all this on the anniversary of both Warsaw's premiere and me joining the Cats fandom

#I'll be forever greatfull to the person who messaged me last night to tell me about this sale #if two years ago someone wrre to tell me I'd one day own a whole costume id laugh in gheir face cuz it seemed impossible #last night and this morning i was just wishing i could maybe find the vest #im so happy im gonna cry #cats the musical #cats warsaw #warsaw guy talks #cats Warsaw costumes #jellicle cats

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coollyinterferes · 5 months ago

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The unmistakable sound of footsteps approaching begins to fill the air. Whoever is coming seems to have brought some company along…

They are getting closer… and closer… and closer…

…and closer…

……until..................

"Goooooood evenin'!!" Comes the loud greeting from a certain blond man. A big smile on his face and all.

"We beg your pardon for our prolonged absence. It was completely beyond our control..." Then adds the gentleman standing by his side, apologizing on behalf of both, offering a genuine smile along with the apology.

"...BUT! We're back!" And hopefully for good this time…

#[HI HIIIIIII~~ HOW'S EVERYONE DOING?? 8)]#[IDK IF ANYONE REMEMBERS ME OR MY MUSES ANYMORE?? BUT HELLOOO]#[one million years later but we're backkkkkk]#[i'd like to start by apologizing for completely disappearing for months without any announcement]#[life has been far from kind all this year so far and this has greatly and negatively impacted me emotionally]#[like..very VERY badly (harmful stuff and etc)]#[all to a point where i've had to take some time off from most social media]#[and which is also why i haven't checked or replied to any messages anywhere in a while]#[not that i'm the most social and most active person ever but you get what i mean here ;v;]#[the original plan was to come back here like a month or so ago but as you can guess i was unable to due to the same irl issues]#[i'm not gonna lie i'm still not doing well]#[but i wanted to come back or at least try to]#[since writing for these two and the ogre street guys always brings me joy and i also missed everyone here!]#[i'm still unsure if dropping threads will be the way to go for now or not #because i have no idea if my partners are still interested in any threads we had prior my unannounced hiatus]#[or if anyone's still interested in interacting with me and my muses again ;v;]#[so if we have ongoing threads i'll likely be jumping into your IMs over the course of the days to ask about it]#[i just need to check my thread tracker first because i can't remember what i owed last time ;;;;;;]#[as always: we can start new stuff any time in case you're no longer feeling whatever threads we had]#[and we can also start from scratch if that's best too]#[so no worries there!]#[enough blablah from me for now]#[i missed you all so much!]#[and to the new followers this blog somehow earned in my absence: Hi!! Thank you for following and I hope we can interact soon!!]#[hope everyone has been doing great during my absence!! <3]#;speedwagon says (( ic ))#;jonathan says (( ic ))#;ic #(??#;speedwagon withdraws coolly

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grimmweepers · 5 months ago

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life comes at you so fast

#tw personal #tw death #tw cancer #not my usual silly goofy post but it’s hard to remain that way when there’s a lot weighing on your mind #cancer sucks #and it’s unfair how quickly it can take people from us #one moment they seem fine and the next they’re in the icu with a week left to live #he passed two nights ago #i wasn’t planning to post about it but i have the tendency to disassociate from my grief #so here i am instead of wherever the hell!#it’s heartbreaking because he and his wife weren’t just my mum’s bosses - they were long-time friends #i have clear childhood memories of playing at their house with their son #his youngest child is only 3 years old #as soon as he found out he started giving his final messages to his staff #obviously nobody wants to die in that situation #but you could feel how much he *wanted to live*#when i was told about his death it was in the morning and it didn’t feel real #every time i had seen him in the last year he always had a smile on his face #it’s always been hard for me to deal with the prospect of death #and understand how fragile life is #how REAL mortality is #it hits even harder when it happens to someone who was so FULL of life #sighs #life comes at you fast #sometimes in all directions and in every possible and testing way imaginable #i’ve been trying to write and feel any sense of normalcy this evening but for a multitude of reasons i have a sinking feeling in my stomach #sometimes when i’m upset i try recycle the feeling into excitement or happiness over something else #yeah … i can’t really do that tonight #apologies if my energy is bleh. hold your loved ones close. now i return you to my regular scheduled programming

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silvertsundere · 1 month ago

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Napping Lily by stefich! 💤

#liliana aezalea #original character #silver comms #worked with them a couple times last year but they were gone for some months #messaged them some weeks ago cause I wanted to get a lily pic since they did vivi back then too #and they absolutely killed it. it's very nice to see how much they've improved in that time too :)

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yardsards · 3 months ago

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"they never dated but they ARE exes" is such a funny relationship for two characters to have. very awkward relationship to have irl tho

#eliot posts #it still IS a little funny irl tho #i visoted her last night cuz i was in town and the vibe was so weird #it's like. we had an EXPLOSIVE breakup years ago and we're on amicable terms now but there's just the past kinda hanging there in the air #im no longer upset about the stuff she did to me but i AM still a lil sore abt how she hurt our other friends #but sometimes i still talk to her out of... idk. nostalgia or something?#idk if it's the same thing driving her to keep talking to me or what #i don't think she holds any ill feelings towards me cuz she admitted she was totally in the wrong for pretty much everything #and the worst i did was be TOO loyal and enable her but at the same time she thinks she'd be worse off if i didn't do all that back then idk #sometimes i wonder if she wants our old relationship but but i've made it clear we'll never be able to go back there #sidenote: her actual ex boyfriend (who i am still besties with and love so much) is the one that started the joke that me and her are exes #he was like ''i think she's not just MY ex girlfriend she's OUR ex girlfriend'' when i was telling my roommate about her #(and then i told her about that and she laughed and agreed that yeah. we basically ARE exes)#her actual ex/my bestie won't talk to her at all anymore and he's totally within his rights to do that #i actually asked him a few years ago if he was okay with me talking to her before i messaged her cuz i didn't wanna risk hurting him #anyway yeah. it's weird #seeing her left me with a lot of feelings that aren't exactly bad just Weird. idk.

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stardustedknuckles · 22 days ago

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Having communities advertised to me on here is wild because like. I've already carved out the spaces I wanna be in, thanks. That was kind of the whole deal here. Yes I like Wicked. No you couldn't pay me to voluntarily interact with people who joined a community for people who like Wicked. I follow a whole three people who talk about critical role and I'm prepared to make it two at any point even that becomes too much. And that's like, my main deal.

#If I wanted to talk to people who liked wicked I would already be in that Fandom #Or I would message my best friend who went through the phase with me more than 10 years ago #What exactly appeals about throwing myself into a group of people who like talking about a thing #I didn't even do that for beauyasha until the show was over and even then I didn't last #I've learned that no one thing in common is ever enough to guarantee any kind of harmony #And that includes sexuality and neurodivergent diagnoses #It turns out the vast majority of people are goddamn annoying and that's their right! I'm annoying to plenty of people too.#But why am I being invited to join the Annoying Pit every time I scroll #Wicked is just the example I saw most recently to be clear

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icewindandboringhorror · 5 months ago

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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently

#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting #with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though #you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would #think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page #disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol #THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended #(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever #so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with #no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know #EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably #It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end #point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc #I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc #rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is #not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school #but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia #and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like #the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot #or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are #familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them #Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol

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thinkmanythingsofit · 1 month ago

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Starting off the new year with just doing things instead of procrastinating. I really wanna keep that going! It's not even that hard once you manage to get into it. But boy does it sometimes seem insurmountable.

#last summer i finally messaged a friend who i met at an internship 5 years ago and we got along well but didn't spend much time together #and it turned out she had also thought about to take up contact again but just didn't get to it #and then i forgot to answer her again for 3 months but finally in december said we should just book a day right away so we can't forget it #and that was today and we had so much fun #it's never too late to contact someone again even if you didn't speak for 5 years #just do it

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weaselle · 5 months ago

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if you were me inside myself but her i met last evening, then we are who i want to be i used to see in dreaming; i lost you got too crossed up tossed our time in trade for running, and stopped our dreamscape dalliance forgot how you are stunning; I ran from drift and day dream, I ran from mental deep- i left the TV playing, and drugged myself to sleep- refused to be inside my mind in bed my head the zone i fled and kept distracted til i passed out all alone abandoning our meeting, i kept us far apart - but in shutting out my you, i locked away my heart. So no more my fleeing being me alone, i'll fight the urge to fear our fortressed soul and see you there tonight

#poem #poetry #i used to love the drifting time right before sleep wandering my mind to find fulfillment #but years ago i stopped doing that and started to hate lying awake in bed for that period before sleep #getting stoned and passing out while some TV show played #i'm sober now but still in the habit of leaving something on to hold my attention until i go unconscious #but i'm starting to think that daydream drift time before sleep is actually really necessary #and i met someone in last night's dreams who had an important message for me #my life

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snixx · 11 months ago

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rip fags the random self mutilating urge to text my ex in the middle of math won out today

#vagueposting the shit out of tumblr dot com #i just did really well on a sociology surprise quiz and idk why the old impulse to scream about it with her came back #i didn't tell her about it though i just asked how she is now boards are over #messages haven't delivered yet rip #and i deleted her contact do i just searched her bame on whatsapp to find her number #and instead i found a picture of us getting rolls at garia hat last year:') almost exactly a year ago #maybe we can fix it idk. maybe i should call her maybe we could start afresh #we've had enough space that idt well relapse into our old dynamic

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inkuboa · 4 months ago

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