#kon himself is like haha what. haha what??? haha

[mamawasatesttube]

thinking about putting bart in a time loop...

[suzukiblu]

welp I remain INCREDIBLY weak to positive reinforcement, haha, so day two of “Kon meets pink kryptonite and decides to fuck Tim and his boyfriend about it” behind the cut. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

Tim takes the obvious opportunity that Bernard chattering and Kon being a little bit dumbstruck gives him–because like, of fucking course he does, he’s a Bat–and offers Kon the caramel-dipped waffle quarter again, and Kon, like . . . okay, well fucking obviously he’s gonna eat it, Bernard made the damn caramel from scratch and Tim is offering it to him. Like, there is not a world in which he does not eat that. 

He takes a bite, mostly distracted by what Bernard’s going on about with whipped cream and hand mixers and whatever and idly having some related kinky thoughts because, like, in his defense, whipped cream, and then forgets completely about what Bernard’s going on about with . . . whatever Bernard’s going on about. 

“Oh my god what did you put in this,” Kon blurts, half-covering his mouth with a hand before he accidentally spits out any waffle crumbs and staring at Bernard for a moment. Like, the waffle is warm and basically the perfect mix between outside crunch and inside fluff, but also it tastes like–what the fuck is in this, seriously, is there sex pollen in this or something? 

“Oh, it’s actually basically my banana bread recipe, so . . . banana? Like a significant amount of banana, and then some sour cream, and a little cinnamon, brown sugar, and vanilla,” Bernard ticks off, gesturing with a waffle chunk of his own before spooning some whipped cream onto it, because Bernard apparently just made . . . everything on this breakfast tray from scratch, okay. Like . . . yeah. Okay then. “And also there’s some chocolate chips and chopped pecans in there, because like, literally what is not better with chocolate, seriously. Admittedly I don’t actually know how good it is with peaches, haven’t tried that one before, but I figure at least the caramel should be good.” 

Kon stares blankly at the dude and resists the instinctive marriage proposal currently warring with his natural “kept boy” instincts, then takes another bite of waffle when Tim offers it. It keeps tasting, like, fucking delicious, and also now he can break down “fucking delicious” in a little bit more detail than, like . . . just “fucking delicious”, basically. 

. . . will Ma kill him if he asks another cook for their waffle recipe? Is that a thing he might have to worry about? 

. . . . . . could be worth it, honestly. And she might let him live if he shares. 

“Do you, like, cook a lot, or . . . ?” he asks, half-trailing off when Tim feeds him more fucking deliciousness, which is in his defense pretty distracting. Like–Jesus, how did Bernard get an alleged banana bread recipe to make waffles this fluffy? Like, what fucking witchcraft was involved in that one? 

“Constantly and all the time and nowhere near as much as I wanna, so honestly the excuse to make an extra sauce was kinda nice, not gonna lie, it’s very relaxing,” Bernard replies frankly, stacking up some banana slices on his waffle chunk and then making himself a little waffle sandwich to stuff into his mouth effectively whole. The little waffle sandwich is weirdly adorable. Like, to the degree Kon would probably find it adorable even if he weren’t high on pink kryptonite right now, but like, maybe that’s the banana bread waffles’ fault. “Well, actually caramel is low-key the devil because you cannot ever take your eyes off it ever without it burning to shit and ruining your godsdamn pot, but it’s not like I didn’t have time to baby it so it’s whatever. Why, do you cook?” 

“Um . . . naw, just I help, um . . . well, there’s, like–I help bake, a little?” Kon replies hesitantly. Which, like, is mostly just him fetching shit and kneading stuff for Ma so her arthritis doesn’t act up as a dumb little excuse to, like, hang around the kitchen and living room area when she and Pa are talking, sometimes, but . . . technically it counts, he guesses? Like, technically? 

Bernard perks up, like–instantly, and to a really surprising amount, which is a little weird, and Kon isn’t sure what that’s about. 

“Oh, so the most evil culinary art then, wow,” Bernard says, sounding impressed. Which is definitely not what he is actually is, unless Kon has somehow given him a very incorrect impression of his baking skills, but still feels a little flustering to hear in relation to, like, something besides being good in bed. Like, just given the nature of this particular long weekend and all. 

“Uh–what?” Kon asks, trying to figure out what Bernard’s actually talking about here, and Bernard starts making himself another little banana/whipped cream waffle sandwich with an easy little shrug. 

“You know, like how the first rule of cooking is have fun and be yourself and the first rule of baking is stay calm because the dough can smell fear, is what I mean,” he replies reasonably. 

“I mean it’s not that hard, honestly, I can kinda like, just feel when it’s baked enough without having to check, so . . .” Kon shrugs himself, feeling a little awkward about it. Like–it’s kinda cheaty, honestly. “Or like, proofed or whatever.” 

“I hate you, come work at the restaurant I’m gonna open when I’m thirty-two, you can make all our bread in-house,” Bernard says very feelingly, and Kon forgets the awkward feeling to start snickering, because this dude is ridiculous, and still funny as fuck on top of that. 

“I literally just help out, man,” he says. “I am at best the actual baker’s errand boy.” 

“You just told me you can feel when the bread’s risen enough, you bastard, I am gonna press-gang you into this restaurant if I have to,” Bernard retorts huffily, then pauses, looks speculative, and asks: “Does that work on souffle, actually?” 

“I mean, I guess it would?” Kon replies with a frown, tilting his head a little. “Never tried, but–” 

“Hey Tim, I’m press-ganging your boy onto the line, good news, you won’t have to deal with me ranting about how much I hate my pastry chef every morning over coffee when we’re thirty-two,” Bernard informs Tim casually, and Tim’s mouth quirks in amusement and Kon just laughs helplessly again. 

“Oh my god, Bernard, I am the last person you wanna get to make pastry, much less restaurant pastry,” he says, still laughing. 

“I don’t know, your presentation skills would be pretty good, I’d think,” Tim says reasonably, which totally derails Kon’s cracking up. “You’re pretty artistic when you want to be. And definitely creative, and good with your hands on top of that.” 

Kon feels briefly startled–like, startled enough to not even make a sex joke about the “good with your hands” comment–because he like . . . basically never does anything that’d really count as “artistic”, as far as he’s concerned, and he’s really only “creative” in terms of coming up with creative new ways to curbstomp bad guys or whatever, not . . . 

He bites the rest of the waffle quarter out of Tim’s hand, mostly to give himself a second to process all the weird things he’s feeling about Tim saying something like that, and then has some more weird feelings when Tim swipes the pad of his thumb across the corner of his mouth to get up a smudge of caramel and then taps it lightly against Kon’s mouth to like . . . invite or offer, maybe, Kon’s not sure which. 

Though like, obviously he licks it clean either way. 

“Ohhhhh, hey, so how delicate does the TTK get?” Bernard asks, his eyes gleaming. 

“Uh–I mean, borderline atomic-level, depending?” Kon replies, a little bewildered still. “But like, that’s kinda an adrenaline-fueled apocalyptic sitch kinda thing, so mostly just . . . I dunno, tweezers? Mini-screwdriver? Somewhere in there?” 

“Okay, so when every single fine dining establishment in Gotham tries to poach you from me, I need you to remember how much you liked my dick when you were gay and pay that favor back by not accepting their disgusting amounts of money and prestige,” Bernard says, and Kon can’t help laughing again, or feeling, like–kind of warm, again. Like, kind of in the horny way, but also kinda . . . not, maybe. 

Seriously, it’s so weird how much hanging out with Bernard feels like getting a crush on a girl he’s just met. Like–very, very much so. Increasingly so, at this point. 

“I dunno, man, unless your fine dining establishment has a pink K chandelier . . .” he counters teasingly, and Bernard looks straight-up delighted by that idea. 

“Ooo, I bet that lighting would be sick, very romantic ambiance for the customer base,” he says with a grin. “What do you think, I could do my supervillain career in Metropolis and then retire to Gotham with all my ill-gotten gains and invest in a chandelier or twelve. You totally wanna get fucked after-hours on my prep counter under flattering rosy lighting, right?” 

“Come on, man, I look good in any lighting,” Kon scoffs, making a show of preening. “Or on any counter, as a matter of fact.” 

“Valid,” Bernard agrees with a sage nod, and Kon feels an irrational level of heat in his face but grins at him again anyway. Like–whatever, it’s the kryptonite; doesn’t mean he can’t enjoy the ride. 

“Yeah, I’m sure the health department would love that, you two,” Tim says wryly, the corner of his mouth ticking up in amusement. 

“Oh my god, Tim, like we wouldn’t clean up after,” Bernard huffs, making a show of rolling his eyes. “Like I don’t know basic food safety standards. But fiiiiine, I’ll put in a special counter just for fucking your boy on when I’m doing the initial remodel, would that make you feel better?” 

“You designing your future professional kitchen with a specific place reserved to have sex with my best friend in it?” Tim asks, tilting his head slightly with a briefly speculative expression. 

“Yes, obviously,” Bernard says. 

“If you made sure the security cameras’d have a good view, I guess,” Tim allows. 

“Why would I need to, look at him, the cameras will be magnetically attracted to him,” Bernard scoffs, and Kon feels sort of–flustered, maybe, and flushed, and kinda–flattered, almost? Just . . . something about that particular sex fantasy is . . . 

Like, it’s just–it's still just a jokey fantasy, yeah, but it's one that sounds like, like . . . like an actual plan would, almost. Like, obviously still just a joke, but . . . he doesn’t know, just a more flattering joke, somehow. Kinda. Also, if he’s really thinking about it . . . well, obviously there’s sex in it, but it’s really less a sex fantasy than it is just, like . . . 

Well. Just . . . a fantasy, he guesses. Like . . . like they’ll all just still know each other in their thirties and know each other well enough to wanna hang out that much and . . . 

Just–yeah. So it’s a little more flattering, kinda. Like, as a fantasy and all. 

It is also making it real fuckin’ hard to concentrate on breakfast, under the circumstances. 

Tim offers him another slice of peach, and Kon bites his lip and glances up at his face again. 

“Rob, man, yours is gonna get cold,” he points out. 

“Really not worried about it,” Tim says, which is sort of hard to argue with, but like . . . 

“But–” Kon starts reflexively, and Tim taps the peach slice against his lower lip. 

“Eat your breakfast like a good boy, and I'll give you something good while I eat mine,” he says, and Kon’s brain fritzes out completely and his gut goes absolutely molten. “Open up.” 

Kon doesn’t even take a moment to actually say anything or even nod, just immediately opens his mouth. 

Tim smiles down at him soft enough to really fry his brain and sets the peach slice on his tongue. There’s some caramel sauce on it, and Kon flashes back to Tim doing the same thing to him with the candy with his own damn come on it and kind of, like, spontaneously combusts or explodes into a supernova or just melts down into caramel himself. 

Tim taps his mouth shut with two fingers under his jaw, and Kon just about fucking swoons over it. 

So–yeah, he is definitely not gonna be arguing about the temperature of anybody’s breakfast right now.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Can we have Azul being very excited to see his parents again with random dorm members questioning if thats the same Azul that's their dorm leader?

Octavinelle A-kun? Octavinelle A-kun. (Context: Octa A/Kon is my Octavinelle mob student OC asdblasdiabis)

Family means Nobody is Left Behind or Forgotten.

Azul had reserved a slot of time early in the afternoon--before the Mostro Lounge's usual hours of operation--for his parents.

As soon as he swung open the doors, his painstaking efforts were made apparent. Every corner of the eatery had been scrubbed, buffed, dusted, mopped, and vacuumed to perfection. Their best china was out, a vase of freshly cut flowers and romantic candlelight marking the table he had saved. The live band he had hired (no expense spared) welcomed the Ashengrotto family with a soft, jazzy melody.

The music came with a chorus of clapping. Several Octavinelle students stood in lines, giving applause to the VIPs.

Azul ushered his parents inside. "Please, come in, come in! Right this way, esteemed sir and madam," he crooned, gesturing for them to follow him.

They settled into their seats and were immediately provided with menus and tall glasses of water, the ice so clear and free of impurities that one could see right through them. Octa A--Kon--their server, hastily pulled his hand back after delivering the items and bowed. How smoothly everything ran, like an orchestra with a skilled conductor.

"So this is what you've been up to at school," Mr. Ashengrotto murmured, a faint smile tugging at his lips. "I must say, it's impressive. Not every 17-year old would be capable of overseeing an entire cafe on top of studying and juggling the responsibilities of a dorm leader--well, perhaps your mother would."

"You really do take after me," Mrs. Ashengrotto laughed, "in more ways than I suspected you did."

"Fufufu. Yes, well... I did learn from the best." Azul straightened, lifting his chin proudly. "As it so happens, I also run a little... side business, shall we say. My peers come to me with their owes, and I do what I can to help alleviate those."

"If only your grandmother could have joined us... I'm sure she would be pleased to hear of your charity work. Perhaps we could pay her a visit on your next trip home."

His stepfather raised his brows. "Seems I've married into a multitalented family."

"Please do not talk down your own abilities. You're quite skilled in your own right, dear stepfather!" Azul wrung his hands together. "Why, I can only hope to match your legal prowess one day!"

“Haha, you’re a sweet talker too. Alright, I’ll take your professional advice. No more talk of business though—let’s decide what to eat.”

“Fufufu, as you wish.”

Kon warily kept his distance, a step or two farther from the table than he usually would. Staring, listening--it was strange, he decided. Never had he heard his dorm leader speaking with such sincerity, with kindness that wasn't laced with hidden ill intent.

Is this... Azul-senpai? He seems a little different around his family. Softer... squisher somehow.

"Pick anything you like off the menu. I'm confident that you will enjoy our dishes, made fresh every day with the best sourced, in-season ingredients possible.” Azul pushed up his glasses with one hand. “If you care for a recommendation, the fried chicken is sublime. It took us a while experimenting with spices to achieve its flavor and texture, but I believe those efforts paid off wonderfully."

“Fried chicken, your old favorite! You hardly touch it anymore.”

“M-Mama…! Er, I mean mother,” Azul quickly corrected himself. “That was back then! Now I am making a conscious effort to mind my health. I ask that you respect that."

“Alright, alright. Point taken.” Mrs. Ashengrotto tapped a finger on her menu. “I’ll take the fried chicken platter appetizer, for old time’s sake. We can split it so you can treat yourself too, dear."

"Oh no, I couldn't possibly..."

"One bite can't hurt," his stepfather urged. "Here, let's get a salad as well to balance it out."

"Th-That is not how nutritional intake works at all..." Azul sighed, a hand to his head. There was a pause, then he flagged Kon over. "... You heard them, correct? One fried chicken platter and the garden salad appetizers to start."

"We'll get those out for you right away," he said robotically. A line, rehearsed. "Take however long you need to decide your mains."

The mob student turned to scurry away and pass along the order to the kitchen. A voice stopped him dead in his tracks.

“And Kon-san?”

He looked back.

His dorm leader had his legs crossed, looking very authoritative as he sat up straight in his booth. He, the lackey, trembling before the boss.

“Y-Yes, sir?” Kon squeaked.

Azul simply smiled. "Thank you for your service."

The breath he had been unconsciously holding slipped out as a sigh. And he tried to smile back.

"Anytime, dorm leader.”

[cosmicpoutine]

leaving a lil rant here :]

I love Tim and his ships sm. Me personally, I only really ship TimKon. Those two are perfect for eachother and have so much clear queer coding that it’s crazy, and they have dialogue that’s just. gay shaped.

I also get TimBart, I don’t ship it romantically but I get why people do!! Tim and Bart are close as well, and the balance they get between ‘depressed tired wet cat’ and ‘living breathing embodiment of adhd’ is great.

I also get TimBartKon, they’re a trio. They are always a trio, so many people like to bring up how TimKon has so much coding and one of the big examples they use is when Tim tried to clone Kon. You know who else he tried to clone? Bart.

The only Tim ship I don’t get is TimBern, or any ship involving those two. When Bernard first appears, he’s Tim’s bully. He actively makes fun of tim and puts him down and then that character is forgotten about until Tim comes out as bi, then they just rework his character and go “haha guys this is his boyfriend not bully ygs are crazy” and just forget about all the bad stuff Bernard did? Reworking a character is great and all but, it just feels a bit weird and out of place for me. There’s always going to be that certain toxicity for TimBern, at least for me.

homie... bully??? im flabbergasted- im speechless- im jason todd (dead)

okay, im gonna start off by saying you have all the right to not ship them, and im not here to defend timbern as a ship. im here to defend BERNARD DOWD.

first thing bernard does is give tim advice about teachers, and he clearly says they're gonna be good friends.

if bernard was a bully, tim wouldn't hang around him so much. besides, i hate it when people place tim as a helpless little boy who would get bullied. he has put himself in situations where he looks weak on purpose to keep his identity safe, but he's not a victim at all. tim is a social butterfly because he's really good at masking and reading people.

not to mention, both bernard and darla push tim a lot because they're trying to get him to open up and be closer to them, but he keeps pushing them away. tim is a professional liar.

and when tim has to quit robin and start hanging out with normal people, he invites bernard over.

and bernard is acting relatively normal, and he wants to play video games and talk about how hot tim's stepmom is.

bernard is a normal teenager who has no idea one of his friends is the hero he's so obsessed with. he even shows concern for robin dying and makes up an entire conspiracy theory about batman havin a robin orphanage. you can tell he's afraid of robin being gone for real because at this point they haven't seen robin in months bc tim retired.

i dont know what about all of these interactions gave you the vibe that he's a bully because all i see is a normal teenager teasing his friends and being jealous tim gets more bitches.

im not saying that bernard was never mean or weird around tim, but he definitely wasn't actively bullying tim.

bernard is obnoxious and cocky, yes. but thats just because they wrote him as a real person. he's the school's chameleon, maybe even a little bit of a loser, too. he knows everyone but keeps a safe distance so that he doesn't get pushed into a box. im not sure if, at this point, he was already in a cult or being indoctrinated, but when we see his parents and the dowd home in tim drake: robin that just doesn't look right.

also homie talk about "forgetting all the bad things bernard did" (which in my opinion is none but okay lets follow that logic) everyone forget about all the bad things batman did to tim, he was not a kind and loving mentor, he was cruel to both tim and steph. we forget that batman was kind of an asshole to damien in the beginning. all those things are forgotten for the sake of the batfam.

in conclusion: we're just so used to the idea that superheroes can only ever form strong friendship bonds by having near death experiences together that we forget that the secret identifies exist and that the people who know them by their legal name also means a lot to them. after all, these people are the reason why they're heroes.

[spacedace]

I know it was a prompt and u said you werent gonna do anything with it (and you so should) but i love ur two posts on the Queen of Clones Elle/Amnesiac Champion Kon AU (especially Kon's knight design (like ghost tattoos?!?!? so so cool) and Elle's relationship with him). Got anymore headcanons about this au? Who are the other clones you envisioned playing the background characters? Do Kon and Tim actually cuddle in the Only One Bed scenario? Does Elle get a cool princess/queen design(s) since Kon gets a knight one? Does Tim walk into Kon's knight practice and have a "oh no he's hot" moment? Just afagshjdksll this au is so cool please tell me all about it

The thing is, whenever I say "I'm going to put X idea here for someone else to grab since I'm never going to do anything with it" I'm lying. I'm a liar. It's still lives in my brain and is taking over all rational thought. I have at least 85% of a story written in my head when I say that, I just know that I'm never going to sit down and actually write it down lol

I have SO MANY thoughts about this AU, you have no idea what you've done asking me about it haha

(and seriously if anything at all in my ramblings here is of interest to anyone have at it, everything I post should always be considered free game to use as a writing prompt haha)

Like, between Elle getting snatched by the GIW & Kon ending up in custody with the Justice League for a bit, a lot of the clones that weren't involved in the rescue(s) who are out in the wider multiverse come pouring in to check on them and there's this huge impromptu "Congrats on Escaping a Government Agency" party for the two of them.

There are so many clones just everywhere, Tim is overwhelmed by them all (and hasn't actually realized that the whole deal of the place is that everyone there is a clone yet). But he's dealing. He's sticking close to Kon (because he's never letting Kon leave his sight again, especially since he's half convinced that Elle kidnapped & brainwashed Kon into being her loyal servant for evil purposes) and getting introduced to the most diverse group of entities he's ever seen before (humans aren't the only ones who get into cloning).

And then there's an excited whoop as some kid comes flying out of a portal and launches himself at Kon, talking a thousand miles a second, just so happy Kon is back and okay and the boy is so chipper and happy and sweet that it takes Tim a second to realize holy shit is that Damian????

The kid is the Heretic, aged down and growing up again with a fresh slate after getting sent to Elle's Haunt post however he disappeared/died in DC canon (I'm a bit fuzzy on those details). Of course that information takes a bit for Tim to figure out, becuase the kid has no memories at all of being the Heretic or of Damian or Talia or Bruce or fighting his way out of a whale fully grown. As far as he's concerned he's Antonio, Paulina Sanchez' adopted son, and like sure he's somebody's clone but that really doesn't matter to him, he only comes to Elle's haunt to hang out and tag along behind Kon because he thinks Kon is the coolest. (Kon is explaining this to Tim as a bright, cheerful, normal kid version of Damian is sitting on his shoulders. Tim is losing his god damn mind).

And the Only One Bed Thing!! Okay, so like, Kon is Elle's Champion and basically her unofficial Heir. When Elle isn't around he's in charge of her Haunt and looking after all the other clones. And even when she is there he just goes full Big Brother mode on everyone. It doesn't matter if the clones that end up in the Haunt are actually older than him, he's their big brother now.

To that end, clones end up coming to Kon all the time in the middle of the night, unable to sleep because of nightmares and stuff. And Kon is the cuddliest motherfucker. He's all about platonic cuddles to help people sleep. Just about every clone that's ever spent any time at Elle's haunt has ended up curled up in a blanket fort in Kon's room getting cuddled into feeling safe and cared for.

So for Kon? Only One Bed is no issue at all.

Oh all the clones coming over for the party has taken up all the rooms and Elle is "too weak from recovering" for her Haunt to make more? Of course Red Robin can stay in his room! His bed is so comfy and there's more than enough room for both of them (and like, sure, he's kinda panicking a little because he's never cuddled with anyone he's sorta had a tiny bit of a crush on, but he cab be cool! Besides, its hard to fully commit to the crush one Red Robin when Mystery Boy is out there somewhere, oh maybe he can ask Red Robin about him! He seems to know so much about Kon he'll know who Kon is in love with back in his old life!)

Tim, on the other hand, is just fully:

Over the prospect of having to keep his shit together while sleeping in the same bed as Kon (who sleeps without a shirt, jesus fucking christ, Kon has tattoos now since when did that happen??? why is he somehow more attractive than when he disappeared??? oh god Tim is going to have a fucking heart attack) especially after Kon drops the bomb that the only thing he can remember from before is some guy that Kon was apparently totally in love with??? Like Tim is being thrown wildly between being a Bi Disaster to being totally devistated and back again.

He mostly manages to keep himself together, at least until it's actually time for bed and it turns out that Kon is a cuddler when he sleeps (Kon did warn him! "just shove me off if I end up trying to use you as a pillow it won't wake me up" he said, and Tim thought "well it can't be that bad" he was so fucking wrong) and Tim ends up wrapped up in a cocoon of muscled and tattooed Kryptonian arms with his face smushed into Kon's chest and Kon nuzzling into Tim's hair in his sleep and it's the most comfortable Tim's ever been in his life and Kon purrs in his sleep like how is that even fair??? (I love the Kyrptonian's purr headcanon so much it has to be in here lol)

By the end of the first week Tim's has slept more and better than he has in years. He's genuinely forgotten what it's like to have a normal sleep schedule. Even with all his panicking, Kon sleepily curling up around him and hugging him like a teddy bear just knocks him out. It's insane.

And Elle! I have so many thoughts about Elle in this AU!

I mentioned it in one of my other posts on this AU that Elle gives off Vibes based off her various Epitaphs that she's gained, and I think that she'd kinda push that to the max when it came to Tim for awhile when Kon first shows up with him.

Like, she takes one look at Tim and is like "ah, this is Mystery Boy my amnesiac bestie has been on about forever" while also realizing that Kon has no idea that he's just panic-kidnapped the one person he sorta remembers from his old life. Which is the oppurtunity of so much fun matchmaking chaos. And she loves Kon, she's planning on officially making him her Heir so that he becomes Prince of Clones as well as her Champion, she wants him to be happy.

But also she's protective over him, more even than a lot of the other clones that end up in her Haunt. Kon doesn't remember his old life and he was so badly injured when he ended up in Elle's haunt that Frostbite hadn't been sure he would survive. Add in the fact that Red Robin was clearly with the people that had captured Kon while he and the other clones were getting her out of the GIW facility (and that the Justice League is sort of a government agency in it's own right) and Elle isn't totally sold on Tim.

She goes out of her way to give off extra creepy vibes while around him. Making sure he understands that she's more than strong enough to destroy him if he even thinks about hurting Kon. At least in the early days of Tim being in her haunt. She does, eventually, lighten up - especially when Kon gives her the big eyes and asks her to trust him, that he knows that Red Robin is someone he believes is good and that won't ever hurt him. She's still keeps a close eye on Tim, but does chill out a little after that.

And she does have a Queen Form (and a princess form when she's doing her Crown Princess of the Infinite Realms thing). She has a couple different forms/designs depending on which Epitaph she's invoking (and of course a fun vaguely eldritch shadow form that scares the shit out of Tim haha).

Her Clone Queen design is BIG, not quite massive Eldritch Ghost King Danny big, but definitely big. Like 20-30 feet tall big, so she can pick up and carry/hold all her clone children like little babies (if any clones are from a race/species that's bigger than that her size adjusts so she's always big enough to carry them).

She has a crown made out of mirror shards that float around and move so that it's always changing shape (I've been feeling clones being called "Mirrorborn" in the Infinite Realms since there's kind of a naming convention already with "unborn" and clones could be seen as kind of like reflections in a way. Elle's official title is actually "Queen of the Mirrorborn" though sometimes is called "Mother of Mirrors" that's why Kon's sheild reflects things, since Elle made it for him out of a piece of her crown while naming him her Champion) and wears a dress that also looks like it's covered in mirrors. It's actually very soft and comfortable and it's super common for clones to climb around or curl up in her skirts and sleep in there.

Her dress does turn into armor though if she needs to fight. And while in Clone Queen mode it's actually super easy for her to duplicate herself a bunch of times.

Knight Training!

Once Elle chills out on Tim a little and is fully onboard the matchmaking train with the rest of the clones (all while absolutely none of them tell Kon that Red Robin is obviously his Mystery Boy) she has Fright Knight show up more often to train Kon specifically for the purpose of Tim walking in on shirtless Tim expertly going through sword forms and sparring with various other clones. And of course Tim and Kon have to have a sparring scene, where Tim is so distracted by Kon being so fucking attractive he ends up pinned against a wall with the flat of a sword under his chin and Kon giving him a cheeky wink and then it's on and there's a whole dramatic flirty fight scene as they make their way through half of Elle's Haunt while sword fighting.

Also! Since Elle's entire court is actually there for once, a bunch of different monarchs around the Infinite Realms decide to host a tournament, so Kon gets to do official knight stuff in his best armor. And Tim gets place of honor right next to Elle during all the jousting and fighting stuff so he gets the best view of Kon kicking ass.

Tim (still wearing his mask because even if he's pretty sure that no one here is evil or would use his secret identity against him - or even care that he has one) has been all dressed up in some gorgeous clothes fit for his status as "Companion" to a Queen's Champion/future Heir. Just something absolutely insanely georgous in the colors of his Red Robin suit, with a dramatic but entirely functionless cape and Kon's crest (not Elle's but Kon's) embroidered on it and it's Kon's turn to blue screen at seeing Tim for the first time all dressed up.

And Tim is maybe finally putting together from talking with Kon that he might be Mystery Boy that Kon remembers from before and that Kon is in love with. So just before Kon is going out to joust, Tim - taking Elle's advice that he should give Kon a favor before the tournament for good luck - and wanting it to be more meaningful than just a handkerchief or something, takes his mask of and gives it to Kon as his favor.

And Kon just loses his god damn mind because Mystery Boy and Red Robin are the same person and all he wants to do is kiss Tim stupid but Fright Knight Master of Chivalry is like "nope you gotta win this tournament and bring honor to your beloved and do this whole ridiculous song and dance about it, no kissing, get out there and smash some heads together - and keep your helmet on this time!" and just yeets a disgruntled Kon out into the field before he can do anything.

And of course with all this extra incentive - Fright is serious about that whole "prove your love through combat" thing he's not going to be allowed to even kiss Tim's hand unless he wins and is perfectly chivalous while doing it - Kon wins the Tournament and is given the flower crown he's supposed to give to the most beautiful of all the observers and of course he gives it to Tim and he doesn't care if there's a forty step courting process he's supposed to follow Fright, he's fucking kissing Tim and there's nothing you can do about it!

Literally seconds away from them finally kissing is when the Justice League kick down the door to get Tim back.

The ghosts aren't even the ones that wrecks the Justice League's shit for interuppting, it's just Tim screaming at them about being cock blocks for forty minutes while Kon screams into the void in the background.

(Kon does get his memories back eventually, and he and Tim do finally get that kiss and start dating. But at that point Kon has been named Elle's heir so Fright Knight is even more rediculous about Correct Courting Steps than before because Kon is a Prince now. Elle is just relieved that it turns out that the Justice League nuked the GIW while they were looking for Tim, because they were not okay with them or the Anti-Ecto Laws. Kon is mortified at having what is effectively his adoptive mother constantly popping in to dote on him while in the middle of fights, Elle is having a great time.)

[yeetus-feetus]

Sugar sugar

(I need to see these WIPs even tho I'm not part of the fandom)

Oh yeah! Crack treated seriously time! Here's what I got of this wip so far:

Kon was planning on buying some new vinyl records when his card declined at the checkout. He tried his second card and, surprisingly, that one declined too. Huh, had he already spent all of this month's allowance already? How?

Probably all the concerts and parties he went to. And the fancy hotels. And that bet he lost to Cassie.

Shit. How was he going to buy food for himself for the next week and a half with no money?

“Hey, can you put those on hold for me?” he asks the lady at the counter, who nods and asks for his name and number so he can come back for them later.

Kon’s first thought is to go to Lexcorp, his pops has heaps of money, surely he can spare a few hundred dollars, right? He flys over and knocks on the large glass windows of Lex’s private office to try and get his attention.

“Yo! Pops!”

Finally Lex looks up, a tired expression on his face. “What do you want now boy?”

“Gimme money! pleeaassseeee?”

“You spent all of your allowance already?? Konner, we've talked about this!” Lex replies in annoyance.

“But I need money for food! And some really cool vinyls... Please Lex?”

Lex just lets out a heavy sigh. “Go ask your father, I'm busy right now.”

Kon frowns and falls away from the window with a huff. Fine, he’ll go find Clark then.

“Ayo!” he calls as he enters the Daily Planet. He can hear the answering groan from Clark’s office upstairs. Benefits of having super-hearing- or maybe not for Clark in this case.

He’s in his civics, so it’s not suspicious when he leans in the doorway of Clark Kent’s office. “Hey Dad, got any money to spare for your eldest?”

Clark sighs. "I'm not your- whatever. You spent all of your allowance again didn’t you? You know this isn’t a sustainable lifestyle Kon, I’m not giving you anymore money.”

“But-”

“No, it’s time you learnt some responsibility here. I’m putting my foot down, you need to learn you can’t just throw your money around.” Clark states firmly, and Kon’s shoulders drop as he pouts.

“No fair.” he mumbles.

Clark goes back to typing on his computer. “You need to set yourself up a system, money management; have a decent amount of money set aside for needs, and what’s left over can be spent on whatever it is you kids do these days. You know when i was your age i didn’t have half the privileges you do-”

Konner had tuned him out past that point, too busy rolling his eyes and totally not up for a classic Clark lecture.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever old man”. Called over his shoulder as he moved to leave.

“Gosh I hope Jon never becomes as difficult or defiant as that kid”, Clark sighs under his breath, shaking his head as he watches Konner walk away, winking at one of the younger reporters on his way out.

Okay, so Kon has zero dollars to his name right now. Right, he can figure this out…

By 'figure it out', he means he’s going to go whine about it to all his friends.

Back at Mount Justice, Bart is laughing at him- like full on cackling. Which, rude. “I can’t believe you spent all your money already haha! Guess you’re gonna have to stay here with the rest of us until daddy’s money kicks back in”.

Kon groans. Those vinyls he wanted can only be held for him for a week, then they go back on the shelves. And it’s not that he’s against staying in here— most of his stuff is here after all, he sleeps here most of the time— but he doesn’t know if he can handle a whole two weeks here with nowhere else to go.

“Yeah, I guess”, he replies defeatedly.

“Well if you learnt some money management-” Cassie begins.

“Don’t start, I already got the Clark lecture.” Kon crosses his arms and slumps further back into the couch in the communal living room.

“What’s wrong with him?” Tim asks, walking into the room.

>ping<

Kon sits up and reaches for his phone on the coffee table as Cassie begins explaining the situation to Tim. Then, suddenly, Kon is standing up and pacing.

“NO FUCKIN WAY!!”

“What happened?” Bart asks, trying to peek at the screen.

“Lex says he and Clark had a conversation about my over-spending habits and have come to an agreement to cut my allowances altogether. Apparently I’m too spoiled and need to experience working a civilian job in order to learn blah blah blah bullshit!” he finishes.

“Well you do need to learn how to manage your spending, but cutting you off completely is a bit rough”, Tim speaks up.

Kon slumps back onto the couch and holds his head in his hands.

“Rough? It’s completely cruel, how is Kon going to keep up his rich babygirl lifestyle”, Bart giggles.

“Shut up Bartholomew!” Kon tosses a couch cushion at his head, which Bart easily dodges.

“You did not just full name me.” The speedster crosses his arms and glares at Kon.

Kon groans loudly and tosses himself back so he’s spread out across the couch dramatically.

“You could just pick up a casual job like the rest of us y’know”, Cassie states, shoving his legs off the couch so she can sit down.

“Me? Work? Nuh uh. Not gonna happen.”

“You’re gonna have to, we all take turns paying for the meals here, you can’t just leach off the rest of us. You know that.” She reminds him. "I think this whole being cut off thing may be a valuable lesson for you”, she tells him with a shit-eating grin.

“But I don't want to wooorkk”, Kon whines. “I was created to kick ass and look pretty, not slave away in some shitty retail job or whatever.” “Oh come on, you’d do great in customer service dude,” Bart pipes up. “You could just charm them all into spending all their money with your good looks. Maybe even get to flirt with some of the really cute ones? Might even get a decent raise if you lure in a ton more customers.”

“What, you want him to basically whore himself out to earn brownie points at work?” Cassie.

“Well when you put it like that… wait actually, maybe being a whore could work for him”, Bart laughs.

“Excuse me!? I’m right here guys!” Kon speaks up. “And I'm not a whore. I’m not going to sleep around for cash!” He pouts.

“No you misunderstand. I meant you should try being a Sugar Baby or something, which doesn’t actually necessarily involve sleeping with anyone. Your boyish charm and perfectly sculpted muscles should be enough for people to throw money at you for no other reason.” Bart explains. “Plus, you wouldn't have to work, and you’d probably end up getting paid heaps.”

Tim finally speaks up then. “Bart’s not wrong. And it’s not a totally bad idea actually.”

Everyone turns to look at him in surprise, Cassie immediately questioning him. “You’re really indulging this idea? Are you serious right now??”

Tim shrugs. “I have a Sugar Baby.”

“WHAT!?” “WHAT???” “Wait really!?” “How!?!?” Bart demands to know.

“I don’t know, it just sort of happened…” Tim rubs at the back of his neck. “He’s only a year younger than me, and he was going to be kicked out his apartment and I don't know... Just, he’s really cute and I wanted to help him out- ...Stop looking at me like you're judging me Cassie!”

“What and you just pay this guys rent because you think he’s cute!?” Cassie questions.

“Well, I pay a little more than just his rent, and he does make it worth it so…” Tim trails off, going a little pink in the face.

“How does he make it worth it?” Konner sits up in curiosity.

“And how much are you spending on him???” Bart.

Tim gives his attention to Bart first. “Well y’know, just his bills, College fees and all that- And occasional gifts or nice dinners when we get time to go out on dates and stuff, mostly we just hang out and play video games together though… sooo yeah", he explains. "Oh, and I have total access to his bank account”.

“Unbelievable.” Cassie comments. She can’t believe they’re only just finding out about this now, with the way Tim talks about it, it sounds like this has been going on for a while.

“Okay, but- what does he do for you, y’know, as a Sugar Baby?” Kon asks, his eyes full of eager curiosity.

Tim goes pink again. “Well, it’s mostly just company outside of the whole vigilante thing. It’s nice spending time with someone in a civilian environment I guess, and Bernard is just so nice. It’s mostly just normal couple stuff I think? Not that we’re in, like, an official relationship or anything..."

Kon hums. “So sex, then. Right?”

“NO!" Tim is quick to shout. "Well, not at first anyway… it’s not centred around that at all- It’s nothing like that in the least!" He explains. "that’s only something that’s come up just recently okay! It was just me helping him out and him being a little flirtatious with me, nothing more …Until about a week ago, okay?”

“Yeah, I am not getting any further involved with this conversion.” And Cassie nopes right out of there.

Tim sighs and watches as she leaves, a little embarrassed. Honestly it’s his own fault for mentioning it in the first place.

“Byeee Cassie!” Bart calls after her, giggling.

“Okay well flirting and occasionally going out on dates is easy, I can do that”, Kon concludes.

“See, told you. You could easily be a Sugar Baby!" Bart beams, mostly just happy that one of his ideas was actually a good one.

“Yeah so, Tim, I could just be your Sugar Baby right?”

Tim sputters and goes even more pink. "What!?”

“Well Sugar Daddies usually have more than just the one Baby, right?” Bart.

“Well yeah but- I wouldn't exactly refer to myself as a uhm.. I am only 19", Tim reminds him, "and I mean- well... Yeah that is sorta true but-”

“But what?” Bart asks cheekily. “Come on! you helped out this Bernard guy. You wouldn’t help out your absolute hunk of a teammate?C'moooon Timmy, look at this poor boy, not a single cent to his name”, Bart teases.

“Yeah, and you could do that money management thing or whatever if you have access to my account too!” Kon says, a hopeful look in his eyes.

“Well- yeah, um. Okay, let me just take a moment to really think this through before I do something stupid.... I’ll get back to you.” And just like that, the flustered little Robin was out the door.

Bart turned to smirk at Kon. “Nice! You totally got him, I bet you by tomorrow afternoon you'll have the money for those sweet vinyls dude- And I am so gonna tweet about it!”

“You will not tweet about it! My dads can't know! And I'm sure Batman wouldn't appreciate it", Kon replied firmly. "And that's if Tim even agrees to this.

“Oh he will, trust me.”

I want Kon to end up meeting Tim's other sugar baby and immediately realising Tim was right about him being cute. More than cute even, absolutely stunning.

[thealexanderfiles]

1. Yes, but what they know is not the full truth typically. Best example is in Young Justice, the world is made to believe their base is the Hall of Justice, when that’s just a ruse, the real base is an orbiting satellite in space called the Watchtower.

2. Yes the public knows about Batman. The degree of how much they know about him can vary by story.

3. Both? Definitely vigilante, but in Gotham that means hero.

4. Yes!! In fact, my favorite interpretation is that people think Superman doesn’t even have a secret identity, and that his “secret identity” is as his birth self, Kal-El, and that he lives in the fortress of solitude. Lex Luthor uses xenophobia to rally people, saying that an alien shouldn’t be a protector of/champion for humanity.

5. Nightwing!!

6. Oooof there’s a lot here.

Canon I’ll go: Clark/Lous, Batman/Catwoman, Bruce/Talia, Dick/Barbara, Dick/Starfire, Tim/Stephanie, Tim/Bernard Dowd, Barry Allen/Iris West, Wally West/Linda Park, Wally West/Artemis Crock (Young Justice), Jason Todd/Artemis of Bana Migdrall (cannot spell that haha), Green Arrow/Black Canary, Harley Quinn/Poison Ivy, Raven/Beast Boy, and I’m definitely missing some but that’s what I’m thinking of rn.

Non-Canon (NOT INCLUDING BATCEST OR ANY OTHER INCEST/AGE-DIFFERENCE SHIPS!!): Batman/Superman, Batman/Superman/Wonder Woman, basically Batman/anyone on the JL besides Shazam, Dick Grayson/Wally West (love this one), Jason Todd/Roy Harper, Tim Drake/Kon Kent, Tim Drake/Kon Kent/Bernard Dowd, Damian Wayne/Jon Kent, Hal Jordan/Barry Allen, Ted Kord (Blue Beetle)/Booster Gold (practically canon lol), Stephanie Brown/Cassandra Cain, and I’m definitely missing some but that’s what I’m thinking of rn.

7. Really really really really weird.

8. Jon Kent is the second main universe Superboy!! He is the son of Lois and Clark, and is Damian Wayne’s best friend. Recently, he was aged up for various reasons, so he’s roughly 18 I THINK, which puts him a few years ahead of Damian which made people Not Thrilled. He has operated (and I think technically still is operating) as Superman himself, and he is bisexual!!

9. Yep still Nightwing (Dick Grayson). Stephanie Brown, Damian Wayne, and Tim Drake are up there too.

10. I have a FEW: Donna Troy, Cassie Sandsmark, Duke Thomas, Carrie Kelly, and I’m definitely missing some but that’s what I’m thinking of rn.

11. Okay so the college thing I believe is a fanon thing, but I love it. She is a psychologist or psychiatrist (can’t remember which rn), though her license has probably been revoked several times over by now. She did leave the joker, and has an amazing girlfriend (Poison Ivy) now. She and Batman aren’t friends-friends, but they aren’t particularly enemies either. Fanon will fluctuate with that though. Take your pick!

12. Yes!! The secret Batfamily stuff is a non-canon compliant fanon trope (that I do love to read and see, but don’t want in canon)

13. Depends on who you ask. Truly. He has done some bad stuff to his kids in the comics, but that’s what happens when hundreds of writers and artists all give their own take on the character, over now almost 100 years. I personally prefer Good Dad Batman, and tenddddd to choose to ignore the terrible things he did in canon on occasion. Others don’t, and that’s okay.

(Also for the Jason Todd anon: literally just WFA for free)

Hi! i hope you got done what you needed to get done nad have been having a good day :)

anyway, omg thanks for clearing up some confusion, would love to hear your 'personal canon' is that like a collection of headcanons or fanon or is it a bunch of small canons that fit together? sorry if this doesn't make sense. Is it, like, something you have it nailed down or do you see something, think, 'oh thats neat' and add it to your collection?

[bi-bats]

🤓 u know why im here haha. 14, 17, 19, 27, 29 please 💕

Bean, hello!!!! Enjoy this food while you get your food lol 💖

14. If you could see one of your fics adapted into a visual medium, such as comic or film, which fan fic would you pick?

Okay. I know I've shit all over Rooftops & Bookshops, but I was able to picture so many of the scenes in that fic SO vividly and clearly, I think I would have to pick that for a film. Specifically, I'm thinking of the scene in the breakroom. That would just be SO funny. And also some of the writing things that bother me now wouldn't be an issue on screen lol

OR I would say You Hear His Voice Once and You Know It Again as a comic. There are so many parts that I think would make really amazing panels rhgruaghr if anyone wants to make fanart for it they are more than welcome to!!!

17. What’s something you’ve learned about while doing research for a fic?

Ballroom dancing, which is funny because I actually barely used the research lmao it was for Too Wise to Woo Peaceably

19. Give us a small teaser from one of your WIPs.

oh boy uhhh okay here's a teaser from the jaytimkon piece!

“He didn’t do anything wrong,” Kon explains, because he knows it’s true. “Are you upset?” Jason asks it like he knows the answer, which of course he does. He’s a bat.  “I guess.” “Did he say something that made you upset?”  “Yes, but—” “—Just because he wasn’t trying to hurt you doesn’t that mean he didn’t.” Kon looks up as Jason takes a bite of his bun, then breathes out a little through his teeth like it was still too hot.  “That doesn’t mean he should be shot?” Kon says hesitantly.  “Step two is empty threats, sweetheart. If I wanted to shoot him, I wouldn’t have to steal bullets from B.”  Kon’s cheeks burn.  Sweetheart. He’s heard Jason use endearments for Tim before, Darlin’ and Baby and Gorgeous and Pretty Boy, and seriously how did Tim think Kon didn’t know they were fucking—but he’s never heard sweetheart come out of Jason’s mouth. His stomach is fluttering, warmth radiating through him, and he wants to giggle in a totally manly and not at all school-girly way, wants to tuck a lock of hair behind his ear and— “Don’t shoot him,” Kon says, a smile creeping out for the first time since this morning. Jason grins back, and his smile is fucking gorgeous.

27. Is there a fic you were nervous to post/share? Why?

Answered that one here!! Sorry 💖

29. Share a bit from a fic you’ll never post OR from a scene that was cut from an already posted fic. (If you don’t have either, just share a random fic idea you have that you don’t plan on getting to.)

alright FINE you can have a snippet from that Know Yourself scene where they were going to bake cookies for Barbara that I had to cut because it was too early to involve her and they weren't getting along this well yet

Tim shifted the groceries in his arms while they waited outside Barbara’s door, eyes flashing over as Jason reached up and tugged the helmet off. Tim forced his eyes back to the door.  “You have flour in your hair.”  “Hm?” Jason asked, tucking the helmet under his arm.  “From the helmet.”  Jason peeked inside the helmet, finding a small streak of flour across the inside. He made an irritated tut, trying to arrange his bag and the helmet so he could get a free hand. Tim sighed and turned to him, shifting the bag in his arms again. He reached up to do it himself, then stopped when Jason pulled back a little, eyes wide with surprise. Tim’s hand hovered in the air, and he raised an eyebrow, waiting for permission.  Jason sighed, then leaned back in.  “Go ahead.”  Tim finished reaching for the streak of white that didn’t belong. He ran his fingers through it, shaking them slightly so that the flour would come out.  Jason’s hair was softer than he thought it would be. Even though they were both still wearing their dominos, Tim could feel Jason’s eyes on him. He looked back, his hand slowing down. “Thanks,” Jason said, his voice was low and rough as it broke the silence, making something warm flare up in Tim’s gut.

thank you for the ask bestie!!! 💖💖💖💖

[tap3werm]

Paprika 7/10

Exposition

You’re introduced to this movie with Paprika in someone's dream. She’s shown to be helping him figure something out about himself. You’re introduced to the device, it lets you enter people's dreams. Dr. Chiba is introduced as really smart, Tokita as well. The bald guy is the one in charge of this project. The chairman is introduced as someone who’s against this technology, as well as technology as a whole. Jin, is someone who’s trying to figure out his trauma through his dreams with Paprika’s help. This device is something that the main characters are trying to produce in order to further psychiatric treatment.

Confrontation

This section of the movie starts with the bald guy being taken over by one of the dream devices. This almost kills him. More and more people that have the dream device are put into a weird schizophrenic state. 

As they try to help Jin with his case, they also investigate the source of this issue. Simultaneously, they deal with their own issues. 

The person they thought was doing this was actually just another victim of it. People's dreams are starting to merge, and like a virus these people get stuck in these dream worlds. 

Climax

I didn’t write this review straight after watching the movie, so I might be wrong, but I think the climax starts with Chiba being attacked while investigating as Paprika. It turns out the dude that had a crush on her, was an antagonist, and the Chairman was using him as a pawn. I kinda forgot exactly what the Chairman wanted, but it’s not like they cared too much about explaining anything about the characters.

The movie ends with the dreams merging with reality, and paprika, Chiba’s alter ego, becoming her own person separate from Chiba. I think them merging was supposed to represent Chiba becoming who she wanted to be, as she had projected herself when disguising herself as Paprika; This is why she’d finally confessed her love for Tokita after being an asshole to him the whole movie. She was basically just repressing herself, and taking it out on him.

I don’t really know what her absorbing the Chairman represented, but she won I guess; Haha. 

Summary

This movie, much like Lord of the rings, found most of its worth in the spectacle of everything. The Animation was beautiful; Really really smooth. The visuals were really unique.You’d never expect what was going to happen next with the weird dream animations, as well as the story. 

As Satoshi Kon said himself, he wasn’t really interested in going super deep into what the characters were feeling. He didn’t care to empathize with them. He wanted to make a cool looking movie. In the novel this is based on, it’s quite the opposite. 

I was kinda tired while watching this movie, so that isn’t the best combination when having to decipher a bunch of trippy symbolism and analogized concepts. 

Overall I can appreciate what he was going for. I personally look for a deep dive into characters when I go through a story, and I think this movie had a lot to gain from that. There was a lot they didn’t add from the source material.

[mamawasatesttube]

man... "time machine" by autoheart has me pondering the agonies. like fuck rebirth not doing that, but. a situation in which via magic or something, everyone [temporarily] forgets kon rebirth style. and he has to deal with that. and oops! what's that? oh it's just his suicidal tendencies coming back in FULL force, haha.

like its devastating enough when his friends don't remember him. but john henry? ma kent? clark?

what's he supposed to do with himself now? he has nothing and no one. he knows what he was made for, though. he wants to die a hero. he wants to die a hero. it won't hurt anyone this time because they forgot they love him. why is he here? he's a hero. he wants to die a hero. except heroes are remembered even after they die. what are you when no one remembers you, other than "dead twice over"? and you keep thinking of how unfair it is that the first time you died it hurt everyone you love. and now they forgot you so you may as well be dead. you kind of wish you stayed dead.

so he's not exactly taking it well. and of course ma and clark take it in stride when he shows up at the farm in distress. maybe it's a case of inadvertent dimension travel or something, clark muses, stroking his chin. and kon looks at the notch on the leg of the sofa that krypto accidentally scratched while wrestling on the floor with kon three months ago and says, haha yeah. maybe.

BUT! this time all the discrepancies and all the little things that don't add up? they're the point. kon gets to go to centennial park and point at his statue next to clark and say look. look, i'm real. i lived. you loved me. i died. i'm real. i'm real. i'm real.

and i think clark gets really quiet at that point. and then he's devastated. and furious. because he has a little brother/son/cousin/Little Guy. and someone robbed him of all of his memories of him. he has so few kryptonian family members and someone took one of them from him in the most raw, horrific way possible. they took his little guy from him so thoroughly he isn't even grieving. and isn't that in itself a horror? that there's no grief where he knows grief should be?

and i think kon here just kind of sticks Hard to clark's side at this point. if anyone remembered him or the people he loved, they'd find it odd and notable how conspicuously he's avoiding tim, bart, and cassie. unfortunately, no one knows him anymore, so no one notices. but kon just can't face the complete lack of warmth in their faces when they look at him. and it feels like far too much to explain "sorry, you don't know me, but you're supposed to love me. i love you and it's tearing me apart." so he just needs as much space as he can get.

(there's definitely a subplot of tim's nosy ass going "hey bruce, who was that guy with superman and steel at the jla meeting? what was that about? he looked a lot like superman huh?? hey bruce what's up with that guy? hey bruce what's going on--" and bruce, a paranoid asshole on the best of days, just going "i don't trust him." but tim is a nosy little ferret who will not be deterred and quite possibly pulls bart and cassie in on trying to investigate the guy who looks like superman but isn't superman.)

(however, for some reason, the guy who looks like superman but isn't superman seems to want absolutely nothing to do with the three of them. isn't that weird??)

anyways it has to have a happy ending where the curse is lifted or whatever and everyone gets their memories back and kon gets to have an incredibly cathartic breakdown into ma's lap. but probably not before he nearly gets himself killed at least 4 times first. oops!

[suzukiblu]

Five headcanons from the obligatory sugar daddy Tim/sugar baby Kon AU for Paradox. Decided to spend these on a bit of a “word of god” peek into Kon’s current state of mind post-museum/dinner/planetarium, haha. 

Kon is pan and has known this about himself for at least a few months now. Was his gay awakening in any way related to any weird situations involving any princely beastmen who adopted him as a pet while he was a feral amnesiac (no I’m not in romantic love with that specific story arc, why do you ask?)? No comment. Ever. He is not publicly out due to feeling like the conversation would just be too awkward. Specifically the conversation with SUPERMAN would be too awkward. “Hey Kal, so how about that whole concept of sexuality being, uh, genetic . . . ?” Nope. No. No way. That conversation is NOT happening. 

Buuuuut Kon was also not even SLIGHTLY concerned about Tim outing him when he got weird over Tim making the joke about not being able to explain him to his dad, he was just self-consciously assuming that Tim meant he didn’t WANT to explain him to his dad. “Self-esteem”?? What is this “self-esteem” of which you speak???? 

I cannot exaggerate how Not Used to being pursued Kon is. He has never been the pursued one. Ever. Flirting/dating is a contest and a chase and a test and he is ALWAYS the one who’s supposed to be proving himself to someone. That is just how it is supposed to–wait what do you mean you wanna ask HIM out, attractive person?? WIthout him even really DOING anything first?? Does not compute. Does not compute whatsoever. 

Kon is, however, still MUCH more comfortable with the idea of being pursued as a datemate than being pursued as a friend. Like, there’s a script for that he can figure out, and a transactional setup he can follow. The friend idea, though? Nooooot so much, no. Not at all. The friend idea is confusing as fuck, especially when it’s not just CASUAL as fuck. It makes much more sense to him that someone wants into his pants than just wants to hang OUT with him. Just SO much more. 

. . . wait Tim didn’t try to get them a motel room or anything for after their museum/dinner date? Like, he just planned ANOTHER activity to do together that he thought Kon would like? Like–he went to all this trouble to take him somewhere nice and then DIDN’T try to fuck him as an ingrained part of that “nice”? Like, that was just not in his plan, somehow? What the fuck?!?? THIS IS THE WRONG KIND OF TRANSACTIONAL.

[bitch-i-migth-be]

I love your brain, please have a biscuit.

I kept thinking about the og baby a lot while I was writing that. Poor thing, just made up so he can die for the sake of the plot.

Also imposter syndrome.

In this case, for example, it would be interesting to see that even if Tim can relate to Kon- it’s not actually the same, because while Kon was made to replace Superman he never actually had to do it, he got to be his own person.

Tim doesn’t get that here.

He did replace someone. Even if that wasn’t the objective of his creation. He is actively living under the name of a dead boy (which later gets even worse after Jason dies and the whole Replacement Robin situation happens), . he didn’t get to be named by people that loves him or even choose one himself.

If anything the scientists who made him gave him some serial number and called it a day, because you know that cloning Danny isn’t easy, it got to have taken many many tries. Tim would be lucky if he doesn’t have it tattooed somewhere in his body like cattle, the GIW was interested in his biology not his aesthetics.

He didn’t have any other option or resources when the Drakes ‘took him in’, and by the time he could have actually done something about it he was already far too deep in his life as Tim Drake. Far too deep in the vigilante life, far too deep in a family and friends

Before becoming Robin, Tim didn’t think he would get that. He thought he would have to bide his time, be the Perfect Little Son he was purchased to be until he actually had a shot at disappearing with the minimum risk of being dragged back to the labs or the Drake’s;

Following the Dynamic Duo around was never supposed to be more than a pass time, and then maybe doing some wishful thinking about how maybe they could help him, and battling with himself about whether it was a good idea to drag them into his mess.

And then the Joker fucked it all up, his chance was gone and he had to step up before Batman managed to kill himself in his grief because no one else would do it.

Can you imagine if somewhere in his archives he actually has a file with a life he invented/built for himself before being Robin? a name he chose?? With so much care because this was supposed to actually be his. Maybe he still tweaks it up from time to time just because he can’t let the idea go, even now.

And if any of the bats ever finds it they would just think it’s another one of Tim’s alias, like Alvin Draper, and maybe they make fun of him because ‘some of those things are really cheesy, Timbo. how did you came up with that??’

And Tim just has to pretend that he is Fine TM ‘yeah, haha, laugh it up’ like it doesn’t hurt because what is he supposed to say at this point?

It was never supposed to get this far. He was not supposed to get attached, to have people he actually cared about and then lie, lie, lie. Not while he was still Tim.

He should have been gone by now, to have finally laid the memory of Timothy Jackson Drake to rest and become his own person.

But He doesn’t want to loose this. He is catastrophizing whenever he is not in deep denial about the situation but it doesn’t change the facts.

He got an actual life now, with family and friends like he always wanted.

But it’s still a fucking lie

In which Jack & Janet Drake manage to neglect their toddler to death and have to find a replacement before the police or, god forbid, the media tears them apart.

It’s a good thing the US Government is getting rid of the GIW’s highly immoral test subjects before the JL can crack down on them.

Ha. Jokes on you, Jason.  ‘Tim’ has always been the replacement.

[superiorgoobus]

Batfam as shit my friends say/do

Tim: if I was running on ice, I'd wear grippy socks

Jason: yeah it would make sense that you have grippy socks

Tim: .... fuck you

-

Jason: *trying to send a text* goddamn I can't type shit, my fingers are so cold

Steph: sounds like a you problem bud

Jason: it's gonna be a you problem when I throw your ass in a snowbank

-

Dick: haha that looks like a dildo

Duke: must you say that about every cylindrical rubber object you see?

Dick: yes.

-

Steph: hey, did I mention I hate that guy?

Cass: only fifteen times today.

-

Tim, sleep deprived: it would appear as though I have holes in my pants.

Damian: tt. those are ripped jeans. You bought them that way.

-

Dick: that guys phone is really long... and thin... just like a penis...

Duke: I am going to end you.

-

Harper: *at a Gotham knights game* IM BLIND! IM DEAF! I WANNA BE A REF!

-

Jason: I still can't fucking type...

Steph: you know what that is?

Jason: if you say-

Steph: that's a you problem bud

Jason: every time you say that it makes me more and more pissed off.

Steph: if it makes you feel better, I once said that to a guy who said if I broke up with him he's kill himself. I also told him I didn't give a shit if he died.

Jason: that is hilarious.

-

Bruce: dear god I don't want to go outside.

Clark: we're at a hockey game. You had to go outside to get here.

Bruce: well I don't want to do it again.

-

Steph: I can't believe it's -25 out, and some people showed up to class wearing just sweatshirt and jeans. This is Gotham University, no one thinks you're cool, just a dumbass.

-

Tim: *starts an argument with Kon over yikyak despite the fact they're sitting on the same couch*

-

Steph: so then my girlfriend at the time said-

Tim: you know, I probably wouldn't have hooked up with you if I knew you were a lesbian.

Steph: ... I'm not a lesbian. I'm bisexual.

Tim: oh.

-

Damian: where is my knife... I can't find my knife...

Dick: you know scissors would be way more affective for what you're trying to do, right?

Damian: yes but for aesthetic purposes I want to use a knife.

-

Tim: *mixing an alcoholic drink with blue in it*

Bernard: damn, Tim trynna kill with windex over here

-

Dick: I can't believe no one told me there was a new season of Letterkenny out!!!

Jason: hey guess what?

Dick: what

Jason: there's a new season of letterkenny out

Dick: fuck you

-

Steph: hey, zip tie my hands so I can try to get out.

Cass: no, why would I-

Harper: oh fuck yeah

Steph: *cuts her hand trying to escape the zip ties* oh, dude, look! Now I look cool!

-

Cass: *is wearing a sport bra while exercising*

Steph: Cass!!! Stop being naked every time I see you!!

Cass: ???

-

Tim: *sends Bernard a Snapchat using the peach emoji filter*

Bernard: oh my god... the booty emoji...

-

Kate: *has a sign on her office wall that says "all things are possible through sarcasm and profanity." *

-

Tim: *snaps Steph a picture of a drink with an ingredient he's allergic to in it* the urge to drink this to see if it kills me it outrageous

-

Jason: would you like a cake pop?

Damian: a cake... a what?

Jason: a cake pop?

Damian: what on earth is a cake pop?

Jason: DICK NEVER BOUGHT YOU A CAKEPOP? We are resolving this problem today. Get in the Batmobile, we're going to Starbucks and buying you a dozen cake pops.

Damian: you still haven't told me what a cake pop is.

Jason: imagine a lollipop, but cake. And spherical.

Damian: spherical cake?

Jason: yes, spherical cake.

Damian: ... how...

Jason: get your ass in the car and I'll show you how.

[elvesandlanterns]

Kon’s Interlude - Ghost Helpline

Warning: depictions of war, meat eating and throwing up

Konstelacio tries to leave the Watchtower as soon as she entered it. She tried. Two hours later she leaves and erases the summoning circle behind her. She hopes they never call her again as she teleports home.

She has enough energy to teleport it’s fine.

She lands on her ass and stares at the pink carpet. Ugh. Everything in her corner of the house was too fucking bright right now.

“Hello!!! I’m back!!!! … Guys? … Dad?”

Throb. throb. throb.

Bile burned its way up her throat.

Was this it ? Did they leave me? Did Uncle Dan tell them how she’d managed to fuck up without even trying?

“Bbblluubbb???”

Oh a blob ghost.

Right a blob ghost, “Hahaah I’m an idiot of course daddy wouldn’t leave me.” They wouldn’t leave me. At least not Dad and that was enough. It had to be enough.

“Bbbllubbb. Bbb. B. Blurrrb.”

“Haha right! Thanks for sending me the message! Tell dad I love him and can’t wait to see him! And Billy if Billy’s back by now make sure to give him a big soggy hug for me okay!”

“Bbblubb!!” The little slimy looking ball swished its head to hers in what was most likely meant to be a love tap but ended up little more that the creature splaying itself entirely onto her forehead. It left, Violet felt lonely.

Lonely and dumb. How could she forget her family was moving into their new house today?

It explained where everyone was, the empty fridge and missing items. Right, Dad needed this move. He needed, well Violet wasn’t sure what he needed exactly but Dandy said he did. And Violet trusted Dandy. She trusted him with this at least. It was enough.

She smelled something rotting in her nose.

It was enough.

It was enough.

It was enough.

She walked back to her room and looked around. Nobody had packed her things. Her throat burned. She’d fill a bag tomorrow and figure it out.

She laid down in her bed in her room of her dads house.

// “This is mine? Really mine? It’s too pretty. What if I break it?”

“It’s yours, it’s okay. If it breaks I’ll buy you a new one baby I am rich remember?”

“This room is mine too?”

“Yes of course.”

“What it I break it to? What if I break it on purpose.”

“I’m giving it to you, no strings attached. If breaking everything in your room makes you happy then do it. I won’t be mad, because it’s yours okay?”

“Are you mine too then, Dad? You’re mine?”

“Yes”

“What if I break you to?”

“I’ll heal.” //

Konstelacio’s breathing slowed, eyes drooping. It was more than she had ever had before. I was more than she deserved. She smiled cuddled up to her mountain of stuffed animals. It was enough.

—- —- —-

Konner, Conner, Kon-El, Superboy, clone, Kon, clone, Konny, clone, clone boy, it.

So yeah Konner got it. Kon (ha!) stelacio had a write to be upset at Constantine for calling her something she didn’t like. She had apparently asked him not to and he had. Apart of Conner hoped Constantine got cursed. That guy was an asshole.

He gets the snapping defeat of her name, the anger. Conner knew anger well. Something about her made his insides twist. Something in her voice screaming, help me help me something is wrong. He shakes his head and decides to tell Black Canary about it at therapy.

It took a lot of time, and a lot of therapy for Conner to feel okay with himself. With his looks, his voice. Being a clone left him with a lot of self doubt about everything. Where did Superman end and Conner start?

Superboy thought back on the bargaining the league had done over the cure for Vampires Fog and couldn’t help but laugh. Well it was nice to know he at least had a soul in which to barter with now.

Conner gave himself a once over in the mirror before floating out the door. Time for a date with Tim.

—- —- —-

// War was surprisingly boring. When not fighting for their lives all war mounted up to was waiting. Waiting for the next battle, waiting for a chance to wash your bloody clothes, waiting for new orders, waiting for food, waiting for resources, waiting, waiting, waiting. War was boring.

General Dan was angry today. They didn’t have food … again. Violet wasn’t allowed to go hunting and Klarion had decided to stay with her. The mix species battalion had decimated the surrounding area for food a week ago.

Klarion was use to emotional hunger, the physical ache in his stomach rendering the talkative sprite speechless.

Billy was use to physical hunger just fine, telling them stories of Faucet cities kind people with a smile but something about the lack of food had begun to make him twitchy.

Violet was use to both kinds of hunger, so it didn’t matter.

“Billy’s back!!! Violet get up! Look he brought food!”

“There you guys are! Here eat up!”

The trio sat down near their tent. It’s natural for demons to eat meet uncooked, Violet had told Billy multiple times. She didn’t want to be a bother. Half the meat was burnt, no bones and definitely no blood.

Violet ate three bowls anyway. The meat was vividly red enough to play off as blood. It was chewy and sweet and charred in a way the stuck to the back of her throat. It smelled weird and familiar. Then again all burning flesh smelled familiar.Pieces of it kept getting stuck in the back of her throat. Meat wasn’t usually sweet like this. It was juicy, the demons mouth watered as she wondered.

How did they get this? She almost couldn’t believe they had found more game in the woods. It was sweet, Violet knew a type of sweet meat. Sweet blood. Were…. Were they eating a vampire?

Klarion finish off one before looking out into the forest and grimacing.

“Billy Billy you need to eat to!!! You’re a human you need to eat.”

“Of course Vi I am don’t worry. It’s delicious! Some of my best cooking yet. Mmm yum it’s great.”

Right they couldn’t be eating a vampire, humans can’t do that. Whatever Klarion was probably couldn’t eat vampires ether.

Klarion followed Billy’s lead “Yumming and oooing” until the little demonling finished off two more bowls.

Billy stood up to wash the bowls. The air shifted allowing the girl to get a good wiff of the blood on humans pants.

“Horse blood? Are the horses okay? What happened?”

The trio had grown close to their steeds, gifts of their political party, riding them gave the kids an illusion of freedom. Combing, feeding and playing with them had helped the days go faster.

Violet got up and began to look - really look around the campsite. “Billy? Billy? Where’s Fireball? You took him with you hunting right were is he?”

A look crossed both of the boys faces, Klarion downed his tea like it was alcohol. Maybe it was.

“General Dan is bringing the horses back in few hours Vi Vi don’t worry about it.”

True to his word, General brought the horses back and Violet understood were all of the bones must have went.

Everything tasted like ash until the war was over.//

Violet woke up puking.

She wanted her dad, her dad was in Gotham.

She teleported.

[pup-pee]

MADIMADIMAID

1, haha refs brrrrrrrrrrrrr

2, 2,2,2,e2 akhfkjdsss its a ref 2 myyyy valentines drawing where yeah kon has the other half :3

I DO THINK THAT CAROL & BART SHOULD HAVE SOME SENTALMENTAL ITEM THo..... especially bc like when she uhhhhhhh yk "goes 2 visit family" he would clutch that thing until he started bleeding,,,,kinda. he prolly wouldnt b able 2 bleed vry muhc his body would heal 2 fast

unless he started neglecting himself of nutrition then it would slow yk & he could do that bc uhm offffffffffff what happens B) but i dont want 2 do that 2 him ahhahahsdhaShdhsahhHAHAHAH UHHHHH

i kinda wanna b silly & give him what i had which is a goddamn choker LIKE i still have it actually

bart sketches bc i think all my friends h8 me BLEH ^_^

[ruluxe]

your timkon wip about kon confessing that he’s in love with tim as tim is visiting him at the farm is amazing. i hope you continue it because im a sucker for timkon, especially emotional confessions between the two (and then them being happy and content with each other because they deserve the world). and your writing and characterization is just mwuah

omggg thank youu so much 🥰🥰

i really love how my friend and i set the scenario up too. it's really about tim and kon both figuring out who they are and who they want to be in life, and what that means for them as individuals and as friends. the beginning of this hasn't been written out fully, but essentially tim surprises kon on the farm in smallville. so it's been about a year and a half since tim has come out and during this time he got to experience his queerness and a relationship at his own pace and tim really does learn how to balance being a hero and being a person and a partner a lot better. but he and bernard sort of outgrow each other, there's a mutual break up and tim sort of has a bit of identity crisis. it isn't as bad as it sounds, but he's still trying to figure out who he is in terms of a hero, his connection to robin and the batfam and what all that means for Tim Drake moving forward. anway, he needs a break from gotham, besides it's pretty full of heroes as it is, so he decides what better way to relax than to just sort of ground himself with the one person that's always been able to help him do that? and kon, well he's been going through his own identity crisis because he's not really needed anywhere so he just sort of sticks to helping ma and pa out with the farm. anyway they have a few days where they just catch up, tim helps out on the farm too, and it's nice and distracting, helps to clear his head. the subject of his sexuality and the process of how he came to understand it and work through it comes up and kon listens, and it gets him thinking about things he really hadn't before. suddenly a lot of other things are making sense and clicking into place and it really is this lightbulb moment that kon realizes hey, i kinda sorta think i love you. very similar to the lightbulb moment tim is having at the same time. when they eventually talk about it and tim comes around to admitting it to himself and to kon, another dilemma arises. how are they going to make this work -- and does he really want to make it work because they're best friends etc, etc.

this got really long sorry agdjgdk but basically it's the beginning of a journey that spans years and years and they have like six kids and live happily ever after. my friend and i have delved pretty deep into this au and it can get a bit dark at times (may not be for everyone) but if you're ever curious feel free to ask me questions! Idk if it'll ever get written out fully bc i love talking abt it! thank you so much for this comment tho, it really made my day! im really glad that in that short piece you thought the characterization was good bc that was definitely something i worried about haha

(also tagging "friend" nic @chthonicaz)