#knowing she was meant to kill the demon king

[aparticularbandit]

Someone said there wasn't a lot of Frieren fanfic and I looked and there's barely 250 total on AO3 and now I'm like.

I have a Frieren plot bunny.

I could write a Frieren fic.

(Bandit. Finish. The rough. Of OAFC.)

[velvetydream]

꒰ :🥀 [ Till death do us part ] ”♡ᵎ꒱ˀˀ ↷ ⋯

Summary : What if Alastors dear little darling wife, his partner in crime, the person he thought he'd never see again, turns up with Mimzy on the day of the visit of the big boss of hell.

Pairing : Alastor x fem! Reader

Word count : 1899 Words

Genre : Fluff , Drama , Angst

Warnings ➵ Mentions of death, you're shorter than

Vaggie, possessive Alastor, swearing

Prequel -> > The radio star lost <

a/n : I love this trope ngl, tried to not make him to much out of character, hope it worked.. T T

Also I'm rather new to Hazbin Hotel, so I say sorry if anythings seems wrong or out of character! ><

┌───────────────────────── ·  ·  ·  · ♡

The whole hotel was a bit chaotic right now, Lucifer himself would be visiting in just a bit and Charlie wanted everything to be perfect. Colorful decorations were hanging everywhere, a banner was hung up for welcoming the king of hell, how does one even welcome the king of hell into their hotel? Charlie was probably the most stressed of all, but Vaggie did her best to calm her nervous wreck of a girlfriend down.

The moment Lucifer stepped into the hotel was meant to make everything go down, Alastor and his Ego had somehow always a snarky remark against Lucifer. Charlie tried her best to keep them apart, introducing her other friends, before she announced how she would be needing his help. And again the banter between the king of hell and the radio demon started all over again. As if throwing insults at each other before wasn't enough already, now they were pulling at Charlie left and right, like two babies fighting over a toy.

But all things come to an end, which Charlie was thankful for right now, as Mimzy, apparently a friend of Alastor, which was interesting to know he even had any, came barging in with a grand entrance. As the woman now settles down at the bar, talking with the others, Alastor and Charlie took Lucifer on a walk around, Husker disappearing for a second too, but soon joining them at the bar again, a scowl on his face, but something else, undescribable behind his eyes.

A bang was heard through the whole hotel as the entrance door was slammed open and heard could be an angry voice. "MIMZY! You little bitch!" A demon, a slight bit shorter than Vaggie probably, walked in. A scowl evident on the face, as her eyes scan over the place, before falling on the woman she was looking for. "How dare you leave me in the shit like that?! You've got it coming if those sharks don't kill you, I certainly will!" Ignoring the questioning looks of Angel and Husker, you stomp over to the blonde, ready to yank at her hair, when suddenly a bit of debris was thrown through the window and landed beside you, barely missing you by a hair. "The fuck?" The demon's head craned around, looking out the window and there they were, those fuckers Mimzy was in debt to.

You didn't really have time to react much, as three people stormed into the entrance hall, all you could catch was a glimpse of red before the person ran outside, screams of the sharks could be heard, at least those were finally taken care of.

The loan sharks were gone and fought off quickly by that person, his voice now directed to Mimzy, your own eyes on her yourself with a scowl. She and that red demon apparently knew each other quite well, as Mimzy was walking to the door, you finally really looked at the demon. He had short red and black hair, ears sat atop his head, despite scowling Mimzy he was smiling, though a sinister smile it seems. His attire was almost completely red too, a cane was clutched in his hands, as he watched Mimzy walk off, you could only make out a small part of his face. The man seemed so familiar as if you had known him for a long time.. Your heart was running a mile right now, it was getting hard to breathe, and then...

"Thank you Alastor, really.." The long-haired blonde spoke up.. That name, it couldn't be right? Mimzy would've told you, she knew him, she would've definitely told you.. right? You must be mistaken right now.. Your eyes were fixated on the man called Alastor, the voices and sounds around you were all a mush, drowned out as your brain was going all around. Now that you could see his face, he definitely had some resemblance to him.. to your late husband, who had died before you. You were his assistant, his partner in crime, when the news hit you that he was shot, it broke your heart, but still, you continued on alone, killing. That's probably what also got you to hell, well sooner than later you were figured out and soon arrived here in hell.

"Yo smiles, this girly is gawking at you for minutes now." Slowly voices were coming back to you, the white spider beside you talked, pointing his thumb at you, the red-haired now meeting your eyes, his ears straightening and standing alert like the ones of a deer caught in headlight. What irony if he was your Alastor, the irony of dooming him with deer-like features, after getting shot assumed for a deer while hiding one of the many bodies. That day you decided to let him go alone, oh if you just hadn't done that, maybe you both would be alive or you would've at least arrived together in hell.

Alastor was taking slow steps to you, the smile on his face looking strained, yet it never disappeared, his hand was reaching out for you but stopped. Eyes moving over your form, taking in everything. Resemblance to his wife evident, but.. how did he never notice you before? Had he ever met you, walked past, maybe even taken a second glance but dismissed this feeling he has right now.

Swiftly he grabs your wrist, dragging you behind him, ignoring the calls of his name of the other residents, his mind plagued by one only thought, more like one only person.. you.

Stumbling behind him, his grip rather firm on your wrist, yet it felt comforting as if you knew he would never hurt you. Not in your lifetime and also not now in your afterlife. Eyes watching the back of his head, you were wondering what expression his face harbors right now. Was he happy? Was he confused? Disappointed? Maybe he knew where you were all this time but didn't want to meet you. No, he wasn't like this. He may have been distant sometimes while alive, but in the end, he was always a darling to you. Taking care of you, just as he vowed on your wedding day. A distant memory, yet one of the most beautiful ones you have.

A door was opened and as you were pulled inside, the door closed. Steps echoed through the room, you noticed a forest on the other side of the room, but that didn't rather faze you, eyes on him again.. and him only. "Al-" You were interrupted by laughter, the man before you was hugging himself, his arms around him, yet you still weren't able to see his face. "D-Do you know.. How often have I thought about you?!" His voice was loud, a static sound like from a radio accompanied it. One of his hands was tearing at his hair now. "That bitch never told me... I'll make sure to kill her for that.. She kept you from me.." The laughter got even louder, as if the man before you was going insane.

This behavior was nothing new to you, he used to be like this, high on adrenalin when another murder was successful.. Or when he was close to being figured out by the police and detectives, yet he always slipped away right through their incapable fingers.

"I always wondered what happened to you, if you grew old with someone new.." If you were able to see his face right now, you would be able to see the sinister yet possessive smile on his face, his eyes darting around the room.

This all ended in a second when he felt a soft hand on his. He knew this hand, he also knew the person it belonged to like the front of his pocket. "I would never, I carried on alone in your memories, yet I was never as skilled as you darling, so sooner than later they connected all the dots to me." A low chuckle could be heard again, the static radio sound calmed down again too. The tall man slowly turned around now, his hand engulfing your own, his fingers softly running over your own, before he linked them together. How he had missed this feeling, despite having a distaste for people touching him, you were different. Your touch felt warm, like the summer sun kissing his skin, it felt comforting.

"I've missed you mon amour.." His voice was soft, probably the softest it had ever been since he had arrived in hell. His hand guides yours up to his lips, as he closes his eyes and presses a soft kiss to the back of your hand, a smile, now softer, on his lips. He was never one for kissing you on the lips, he definitely favored kissing your hand, like the gentleman he has always been. "I figured with how you were talking seconds ago my dear.." A soft smile was creeping up onto your lips too, mirroring his own one. Red eyes open again, your hand still pressed to his face, but now he was rather holding your hand to his cheek. "Oh how I wished I could've stayed with you my darling, we would've been so successful.." Giggling at his words, with him at your side, you probably would have been going for a long time. "But who says we can't be successful now?" A smirk etched its way onto your husband's face, oh how he loved your daring little mind, always thirsting for blood. With you by his side again now, he would definitely be able to get everything done that he wanted.

"Shall we go back? I want to meet your friends properly." Wanting to pull away your hand, he softly gives you a tug, your head landing on his chest now. Wide eyes look the the side now, as you weren't really able to move, his arms having snaked around you and his chin resting on your head. This was unusual much physical contact, but figured that you hadn't seen each other for multiple decades he yearned for your touch just a slight bit. Your arms lying around him, embracing the hug. "Let's just stay here a few minutes more, we got enough time to introduce you to everyone down there but for now.. let me have you for myself." Nodding softly, your head rests on his chest, as your eyes close and you simply enjoy the presence of your dearly beloved husband.

"What do you mean 'married to smiles'?!" Angel, as he was introduced to you, shouted from his place on the couch now, staring at you flabbergasted. "We've been married for quite a few years before his death." Smiling you answered his question. Alastor didn't like all the attention you were getting, but sooner than later he would have you all to himself again when you two go back to his cozy hotel room or the radio tower. "So you two fu-" Angel wasn't even able to finish his question before he shut himself up as he noticed the look on Alastors face. This time he would've been dead for sure if he finished that question.

Overall everyone invited you happily into their little hotel family, it was amazing. Charlie immediately took a liking to you and if you're being honest she quickly was viewed by you like a daughter.

[caplanbuckybarnes]

In the Lonely Shadows

Summary: Crowely's always there to help convince you everything's going to be okay after Dean leaves with Lisa & Ben.

Requested by my beloved wife @midnight-moonlight-and-mars sometime back in March. LOL, sorry it’s been forever, my love.

Request: I've got a Crowley request! It can be platonic or romantic. It takes place the year Sam is resurrected and dean is living with Lisa. The reader was close with the Winchesters but after the fight with Lucifer dean abandoned the reader to be with Lisa and cas never answers ( unrequited love maybe?) so the reader teams up with Crowley and becomes like a bounty hunter for him for Lucifer loyalists. 

A/N: It's technically not Crowley x reader since she's pining for Dean. Oops, but I hope you enjoy this all the same, my love.

WC: 1054

Warnings: mentions of loneliness, and blood, the reader feels abandoned and unloved, crowley’s nice, however.

Read on Ao3!

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It had been months since Dean had made his choice. The memory still stung—he chose normalcy, Lisa, and a life far from the chaos... far from you.

The moment Dean drove away to that suburban dream with Lisa and Ben, it was like a wound ripping open and never closing. You didn’t hear from him again, and there was no check-in or phone call—just silence. Castiel, too, was gone, leaving nothing but the ghost of his presence. Prayers went unanswered, and you were left alone with the echoes of battles fought and lives lost.

It was after Lucifer fell that everything seemed to break apart. Sam was gone—dead, you thought. Dean buried himself in the illusion of family, and you… well, you weren’t sure what you had anymore. There was no going back to who you were before the apocalypse, and your heart ached with unspoken feelings, ones that Dean never noticed.

He never loved you the way you loved him.

In the emptiness that followed, Crowley found you. The King of Hell always had impeccable timing. "You look like a stray," Crowley had said the night you crossed paths in some dingy bar in some forgotten town. "Lost your boys, I see. Shame. You were always good at what you do."

You could've walked away, but what was left? With nowhere to go and no one to fight for, you accepted Crowley’s offer—a devil's bargain, becoming a bounty hunter for Hell, tracking down Lucifer loyalists who still believed in the fallen archangel’s cause. It was dark work, but it was work, and it kept your mind from drowning in grief and longing.

The irony wasn’t lost on you. Hunting for Crowley meant betraying everything you’d once stood for, but that world had abandoned you first.

Months later, you stood in the ruins of an old church, blood splattered across the stone walls and broken angelic statues depicting Saints. The demon you’d tracked was a fanatic, a true believer in Lucifer’s return. You wiped your blade clean, not even flinching as the body burned to ash behind you. It was mechanical now—kill, move on. Feel nothing.

Crowley appeared, as he often did after a job well done. He smirked, his eyes gleaming with something close to pride. "Well done, love. Another one bites the dust."

You didn’t respond, just holstered your blade and looked out into the night. The stars were out, a stark reminder of the heaven you couldn’t reach, of the angel who had left without a word.

"You know, I’ve always admired your efficiency," Crowley continued, walking up beside you. "But there’s something hollow in it. Still pining for the good ol' days? For Dean? You haven’t been the same since the Moose and Not Moose fled away from the lifestyle."

The mention of Dean's name sent a wave of cold through you, but you kept your face neutral. Crowley was good at finding cracks in your armor, but you weren’t going to let him in. Not tonight.

"He made his choice," you said flatly. "I made mine."

"Yes, yes, he’s playing house while you do the dirty work. How noble of him," Crowley mocked, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "But you and I both know it’s eating you up inside. It’s killing you that he’s living a life that you so desperately crave with him."

You glanced at Crowley, your jaw tight. "What's your point?"

Crowley chuckled, his smile dark. "My point, darling, is that the past always catches up to us. Dean may think he can run from it, but he can’t. Sooner or later, he’ll come crawling back to this life—and to you. And when he does, what will you do? Welcome him with open arms? Or remind him of what he left behind?"

You stared at Crowley, his words sinking in deeper than you wanted to admit. You could pretend that Dean didn’t matter anymore, that you had moved on. But the truth was, no matter how many demons you killed or how many deals you made, there was still a part of you that longed for the life you had before everything went to hell. The part that still loved him. The piece of yur heart where Dean and Sam would wake you up in the mornings with the scents of breakfast wafting through the morning air.

But the man Dean had become—the one who chose Lisa, who walked away without a word—wasn’t the man you had fallen for. Maybe he never was.

"I don’t owe him anything," you said, though your voice sounded hollow even to you.

Crowley’s grin widened, a glimmer of satisfaction in his eyes. "That’s the spirit. But don’t be too quick to write him off. You never know when an old flame might reignite."

That night, alone in a dingy motel room, you sat on the edge of the bed, staring at your phone. You hadn’t tried calling Dean since the day he left, and you weren’t about to now. But your fingers hovered over Castiel’s number, the angel who had disappeared like smoke as Dean had done so long ago.

You had prayed to him, begged for his help, for some sign that you weren’t completely forsaken. But he, like Dean, was gone.

With a bitter sigh, you tossed the phone aside and laid back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. Maybe Crowley was right. Maybe the past never really stayed buried. But what did it matter? You had made your choice, too. You had become something else—something darker, harder.Something you hardly recognized when you’d glanced at your reflection.

The only thing that lingered was the ache. The unspoken words, the love that was never returned, and the haunting thought that in another life, maybe things could have been different.

But this was the life you had now, and there was no going back.

Outside, the world continued its chaotic dance of light and shadow, of good and evil. And you, standing somewhere in between, were left to hunt in the darkness. Alone.

The wind howled against the motel window, but you barely noticed as sleep finally claimed you, the weight of a broken heart your only companion, not noticing the door opening to see a figure standing in the threshold holding a quickly packed luggage bag.

[PART TWO]

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tags!

EVERYTHING PERM: @nekoannie-chan @kjs-s @notyourtypicalrose @mistressofallthingsgeeky

SPN FOREVER PERM: @amelia-song-pond @salt-n-burn-em-all @kenzieam @flamencodiva-reblogs @spn-fanfic-reblog-writes

DEAN WINCHESTER: @fandom-princess-forevermore

[fanfic-obsessed]

Secret Brothers

I have been thinking about a Demon Twins DCxDP crossover, specifically one where absolutely everybody is confused.  Also Ra’s is the Asshole. 

Let’s take a walk.

Damian and Dante(Danny) were twins, raised together, trained together, and loved each other deeply. Talia, though not the best of parents by most measures, does love her children.  The twins are raised as assassins and were extremely effective when teamed together. So effective that Ra’s Al Ghul decided that together they were a threat. He decides that Damian is the preferred twin and heir.

At age nine, almost exactly, Ra’s sends Dante out with another Assassin, who has orders to kill Dante.  The results of this attempt leaves Dante wandering around Northern Arizona to be found by the Fentons (who were on a road trip), with head trauma that means that the only thing Dante remembers is that his name starts with DAN. Talia and Damian believe that Dante was murdered and his body stolen by parties unknown and decide to hunt down Dante’s murderer.  Ra’s, believing Dante dead, allows it for several weeks before deciding that he did not want his daughter and his heir obsessed with an inconsequential spare. So he has a strong magical spell cast on anyone who would have known Dante in the league, hiding and disguising their memories. 

Eight years pass, Damian and Danny are 17. Damian has been living with Bruce since he was 10 and still does not remember he has a twin. Talia still does not remember that she had two sons. 

Dante, now Danny,  still has no clear memories from before he was found by the Fentons. Even the accident with the portal did not bring back those memories.  By the time we start, he has already come out to his parents about being Phantom (in admittedly the most traumatizing way for the Fenton parents as possible-He, Tucker, and Sam sat them down and showed them the full raw security tapes of the accident before telling them anything. Jack and Maddie may be oblivious and obsessive but they are very intelligent. They realized almost immediately what it meant that their portal opened with Danny inside, even before he was spit out a blackened corpse who healed into Phantom). 

This is a good Fenton Parents, who not only took the half ghost realization well but also immediately became a bit obsessed with not only lab safety, as one of their inventions had killed one of their children, but also with understanding ghost culture. They also immediately started manufacturing weapons for ghosts to use against the GIW(The Fentons are 100%, ride or die, enthusiastic at all times and in this one the moment they realize that there were people hurting Danny…they were ready to rip the GIW apart molecule by molecule).  Phantom has also connected with the Justice League, joined the Justice League Dark, who were able to get the Anti Ecto Acts reversed. The Justice League as a whole knows that Phantom is a half ghost, half human King of the Infinite Realms whose civilian name is Danny Fenton but Batman, nor any of his kids, has not had the opportunity to meet Danny out of uniform, as it were.  Batman and Red Hood know and Trust Phantom, as he has also helped with the Pit Rage (The Lazarus Pits are corrupted Ectoplasm for the win).

Which brings us to our start. 

It’s a pretty basic premise. A Cult (14 people present) decides to summon the Ghost King for power.  When Danny was first crowned he set his summoning, but really didn’t want it to be an open season on summonings. So one of his ‘ingredients’ is a drop of family blood (not specifying if it had to be those he considered family, or blood family) with provisions in place so that Danny would be able to tell if it was being forcibly taken or not through the summoning spell. The cult captures the Batfam and uses Damian’s blood to summon the Ghost King. Who arrives, a little confused. 

He’s even more confused when he sees Batman and Co tied up. Ghost King Phantom peers at Batman, not even paying any attention to the cultist. “Did you call?”

Batman grunts a no and jerks his head to the cultist.

Phantom redirects his focus back to the head Cultist who starts to do a grand speech about glorious power. Phantom interrupts him to ask “How did you get my summoning?”

The Head Cultist lights up with pride, “I have a spell that was able to transcribe your summoning, we used another to make sure we got the right ingredients.”

After a little bit of back and forth the Cultist admit that none of them actually understand the language that they used to summon Ghost King Phantom, nor do they know why they needed the ingredients they did.  Ghost King Phantom pinches the bridge of his nose as he laments that cultists have gotten so damned stupid. Phantom asks each cultist what they hoped to get out of this: 1-13 said they wanted power (in reality the head cultist had a hyperfixation on using the spells he used to transcribe the summoning and gather the ingredients and wanted to see what would happen), number 14 was paid to be there; Number 14 was also a little pissed that the people paying her were not doing basic research so that they knew who or what they were summoning. The Cult thought 14 would be an auspicious number. 

Phantom, now curious, takes a brief interlude (after restraining the other 13) to get more information on 14. She was given $200,000 to be part of the circle. She had a magically binding agreement saying that her soul was not to be offered as payment, that there would be a 5 year moratorium on destroying any planet she happened to be on, and that she could not be targeted directly or indirectly by the cult after they gained power. She was also a former Pre Law Student with an interest in contract law. 

Phantom recruits her for Justice League Dark, even going as far as calling Zatanna down to take her back to the Watchtower.  After she was gone he turned back to still tied up Batfam to apologize. He went to say that Constantine had agreed to go to therapy if they could find a way to fix his Contract/Soul issues, of which there were so many (some of the pieces of his soul had been sold multiple times, other were sold as a larger piece then resold by Constantine in smaller pieces while the contracts for the larger pieces were still active, a half dozen of the ‘your soul belongs to me after death’ type contracts had defaulted on the demon's side before they defaulted on Constantine’s side, one piece of Constantine’s soul-in theory a downpayment on a contract- may or may not have been straight up stolen, then sold by a metaphysical fence three dimensions over and might be in the soul equivalent of The British Art Museum) and that Phantoms sister has been eagerly waiting to study Constantine psyche under a microscope. So a Pre Law student with an interest in contract law was too good a find to pass up. 

After untying the Bat fam, Phantom turns to Batman and says that Phantom really does need to figure out how the idiot cultists managed to summon him, so he needed the cultists for a bit to go over what exactly they did and said but after that they could be arrested.  One of the remaining cultists, not the head cultist, objected to being sent to prison. Without missing a beat Phantom shrugged and said he could throw anyone who objected into a hell dimension for a while, clarifying a while could be anywhere from three days to the heat death of the universe. 

The cultists were more cooperative after that. 

Red Robin suggested that the Bats stay too, since it was also in their best interest to figure out how Damian managed to be an ingredient in Phantom’s summoning.  

Phantom goes over every step of the preparation, the spell to know the ingredients, the spell to transcribe the summoning, and the words themselves all the while sighing every so often in irritation at the downward spiral of cultists in general. 

Despite a cacophony of errors including but not limited to:

 -Mixing the ingredients for the ‘paint’, which the instructions specifically said to mix on site and only as needed, early and storing it in one of the cultists bedrooms (Phantom:...you know that mix is highly hallucinogenic, right?/Cultist: Is that why I’ve been followed by a pink bunny for the last three days?/ Phantom<sighing>:Yes, that is why you have been followed by a pink bunny for the last three days) 

-Adding additional runes to the summoning circle, specifically the runes for sacrificing someone (Cultists: The picture of all the other circles had those rune, we figured it was a typo/ Phantom: it wasn’t)

-Inverting one of the added runes, which switched the party receiving the power and the party being sacrificed (Phantom: Because of those runes, I am able to eat all your souls for the purpose of powering Batman and his entourage/Batman:Please don’t, they all give me enough headaches without getting powers/Phantom:looks like you are all in luck.)

Despite these errors the summoning actually worked exactly as intended. So Robin makes the suggestion that they must have some sort of blood relation.  Phantom shrugs and says that he always thought he was an orphan. One of the birds goes “Thought?”. Phantom smiles sheepishly and says that his sister thinks that Phantom escaped from a cult, but that he has no memories prior to being found by his parents at age 9. He also wonders how closely related he would have to be to someone to show up as family.

An offer is made to go to the Batcave and check with a DNA test to see how closely related they are, which Phantom accepts. On the way there Spoiler asks how one gets a Half Ghost. 

Phantom, who is very blase about Death having a near Danny experience, says: Well, you take a 14 year old idiot, yours truly, put him in what he thought was a non working portal to the realm of the dead, add in an accident that caused him to hit the on button that was inexplicably on the inside. And I do mean inexplicably, to this day my parents still don’t know why they put the on button there. It turns out having a portal to the dead open on top of and through you has some really weird side effects.   

This is a slightly worrying answer but frankly masked heroes/vigilantes don’t have a great grasp on normal anyway and Phantom assures them that his parents got much better about lab safety afterwards.  This dovetails into a very casual discussion between everyone about what everyone thought was the most painful way to die and which kind of events sucked the most to live through. 

They get back to the Batcave and Phantom transforms back into Danny (to get the most accurate comparison. Phantom's blood is mainly ectoplasm which would mess with the DNA test, Danny’s blood still has ectoplasm but much less).  Everyone stares at Danny, before Nightwing makes a joke about Robin and Danny sharing a face.  

At the minor cajoling of Nightwing, supported by Agent A, the Bat Fam unmasks. Danny blinks at them and says to Damian ‘Hey, we do share a face.’

They start the blood test. Everyone is taking bets on how close they are related and from what side. This is all still very casual, very much an air of ‘what a weird coincidence’. 

The blood test comes back twins. Everyone looks at the test, then back at Danny and Damian, then back at the test. Without needing any discussion Bruce runs the test again, despite the fact that the visual clues do indicate it was correct the first time.  It still says Twins. 

Damian is both baffled and a little offended. He did not know he had a twin out there. In theory, if Danny left the League at 9 Damian should have some memories of him. Most of the Bat fam thinks this is another case of Talia being a lying asshole.  Cass peers at both Danny and Damian, and signs that something feels strange about the lack of memory (Oracle puts forth the idea that it’s possible they were raised apart in the league. Damian is sure his mother would have told him if he had a twin).  At some point magical memory manipulation is brought up and they contact Zatanna (masks having been put back on, though Danny remains in human form), who comes down gushing about the 14th cultist, whose name was Rachel, who was already plowing through Constantine contracts and already found a clause that would let Constantine reclaim one of the shards of his soul.  

Zatanna is able to find the spell that hid the memories of Danny in Damian's mind.  She warns that it looks like it affected more than Damian and breaking it would remove it from everyone who was affected. Damian looked for Danny’s permission first (as they did not know who or why the spell was cast- it could have been for Danny’s protection). Danny gave the ok and Zatanna removed the spell. She left quickly so that the Bats and birds would feel comfortable showing their identities again.

The effect was immediate. Damian went pale and teary eyed (due to the spell he was never able to process the ��death’ of his brother, basically the trauma spent the last eight years festering under the spell) and whispered ‘Dante?’ before lunging to pull his twin close. Jason was a little dazed (he had a few memories of seeing the demon twins together, at a distance). Danny, whose amnesia was not because of the spell, was unaffected but still hugged Damian, who was now clutching at his brother and crying. 

Far away Talia sat straight up from a sound sleep. Her mind flooded with memories of her precious second son. The son who was murdered and has remained unavenged for 8 years. She quickly made arrangements to head toward New Jersey, she would stop and see Damian and invite him on a hunt. 

It becomes clear quickly that Danny would be staying in the manor for at least the night, Damian did not want to let go of him.  He calls his parents and gives them a brief rundown of the situation (was summoned by weird cultist, found blood family-a twin brother and a father, twin brother was bespelled to forget he had a brother and breaking the spell had made him clingy, would be staying in Gotham for a bit). 

His parents run through a Jazz created set of call and response code phrases to make sure that Danny, and now his brother, were not being held by the cult they presume Danny escaped from. After Danny gives the all clear phrases, Maddie asks to speak with his Biological Father.   

Danny hands the phone over to Bruce, where Maddie cheerfully tells him that He and his entire family would be bringing Danny back to Amity Park on Sunday (it was a Thursday, but it was also summer so Danny could stay for a few days) and staying for dinner, that Maddie, Jack, and Jazz all had some concerns about Danny’s condition when he had been found, that any of Danny’s siblings (making it clear that this also included anyone Damian considered a sibling) were now one of her children as well and if Bruce was or became a threat to any of her children Maddie would kill him, and should Bruce pass her vibe check they could discuss shared custody of the children.  Then, without changing tone, asks how many she should be expecting for dinner on Sunday. 

Bruce answers and hands the phone back to Danny, reminding himself that he had gone toe to toe with actual Gods, he should not be intimidated by a cheerful voice on a phone. He is also trying not to think about the fact that he had acquired yet another child he had not known about. Not to mention running through everything that Phantom had ever told him and trying to stave off several retroactive panic attacks.

It takes a bit but they get Damian calmed enough that they are able to get everyone upstairs, where Danny ends up sharing with Damian (who is still working through eight years of trauma and panics if Danny is not right there). 

On Friday, Talia gets in contact with Damian about hunting Dante’s murderer down. Once Damian assures Danny that Talia was not his murderer (as he could now remember them hunting for Dante’s murderer and their combined grief) and did love him, Danny was willing to meet with Talia.  The Bat fam insist on going with the twins to meet with their biological mother. 

Talia takes Danny being there about the same as Damian did.  Not even Bruce had ever seen her cry before.  She, in her own way, practically begged to be allowed to stay in Gotham with her sons for a bit. Bruce agreed and arranged that she would also go with them to Amity Park to meet Danny’s family. It also takes Talia about 45 second of thought, now that she is not blinded by rage and grief,  to realize that the only person who could have arranged Dante’s murder would have been her Father, and that he was probably the one responsible for their magical memory loss as well.  Tim might have his issues with Talia, but he actually hated Ra’s more; they started scheming together to help Talia and Damian express their displeasure over his actions.

I do want to note, Danny does not start getting memories of being Dante. Those memories are gone as a result of head injury and trauma. While both Talia and Damian would prefer if Danny remembered them, they are so pleased that he is actually alive, as it were, that they are not pushing him.   

When they bring Danny back to Amity Park that Sunday, Jack and Maddie greet all of the ‘kids’ (Dick, Jason, Tim, Damian, Cass, Duke, Steph, Barbara) with specialized weapons, non lethal but will knock out a human quickly  and customized to each child's preferred weapon, hugs, and the family Fudge recipe (which they also give to Alfred) for each of them. Plus gear to prevent being overshadowed and an offer to upgrade all of their current armor and gear.  Talia and Maddie, after a quiet heart to heart, got along frighteningly well (there is a brief discussion about Ra’s and Maddie increasingly creative threats). Jack gets in loud, delighted conversations with each of his new children, somehow finding a special interest for each of them to ask questions about.  Damian is able to step away from Danny for a bit to get into a discussion with Sam, in which everyone decides that they did NOT actually hear the two of them planning some kind of eco terrorism campaign that would end with Lex Luthor broken and crying on the ground.  Tucker and Barbara are enthusiastically talking about hacking while Tucker promises to introduce her and Tim to Technus, who would be a huge fan. Jazz is chomping at the bit to put together psyche profiles for each of them so she can be the best sibling possible. 

At some point Vlad comes in (he had mellowed out once he, Jack, and Maddie got together. It turns out he had been pining for both of them but convinced himself it was only Maddie) and booms that he needs to come meet his brother Bruce. Vlad, knowing exactly how Jack can be, sighs a little and asks how long Bruce Wayne has been his brother. Jack responds cheerfully since he brought Danny back and they realized he was Danny Biological father (Maddie had not asked Bruces name nor any identifying information during her threatening phone call. Jazz despaired).

I think it would be very funny, after the trope of Batman/Bruces Adoption thing, that the entire bat fam is forcibly but cheerfully adopted by the small mid western family, their close friends, and a very haunted town.

[koiiiso]

Like A Moth To The Flame

Jinx/F!Demon!R!

Tags: @kings-paintbrush, @cheust,

Proofread: Yes/No

Summery: Fire was that of a force of chaos, a nature to be reckoned with. Long before the rumors of Janna, there was spoken of a demonic force. A girl who embraced the flame fully, more than that of a life. This girl was an immortal force according to the rumors, yet was a power unmatched. When this outcast meets another who embraced the flames of chaos. A Jinx.

Flames have long since been a common sight within Zaun, fire was everywhere. From cigars, to buildings, then for lighting, fire was versatile.

Spirituality was similar. In Zaun, there were four spirits known of, yet only two had names. Janna, and you. Janna was the spirit of wind, and you were that of fire, of flame. Rumors were spread of you faster then you could catch up.

Rumors on how the flames etched farther than before since the calm dispersed, since Zaun lost its order.

The air was gassed, weakening Janna, leaving you and the other two, the spirits of the water and the earth, yet they ultimately were weakened as well, not to mention their lack of a physical form.

Fire however strengthens within gas, spreading fast as soon as a flame reaches the surface. It’s dangerous, far more than that of those enforcers, the ones that etched their hatred into Zaun. It’s a wonder truly.

So many Zaunites could die, innocents could die, and nothing would be done for it. Yet when those of Piltover were attacked, killed in a way similar to the enforcer raids that were carried out on the daily beforehand, the rich scream for more separation, more oppression despite the contradiction.

Zaun needed a leader, and you needed to rid of the gas, why not combine the two?

So you started your search for the martyr, the perfect person for a revolution. The perfect person to rebel.

After what seemed like years but were only that of hours, you found her, face clad on wanted papers, painting Zaun in more paper which will only end up in waste, yet this land was a wasteland. So it’s nothing but a boost for the end result of demise for every land upon this planet.

You found the leader you needed.

Jinx.

Her lair was never empty, yet grief filled the air as the girl entered, a child by her side. The pair entered and jeez, she’ll have to maybe baby proof it or something.

Isha confused her. The kid knew of her and the people who died from associating with her, so why stay with her? She’s a curse, a Jinx.

Isha was a quiet one, sassy as well. Yet despite her silence, she took to Jinx like a moth would to a flame, uncaring of the danger that would occur. For that alone, Isha was brave.

The longer the two spent together, the more Jinx felt happier, finally felt sane and seen. From the times the pair would make beetles brawl a glorious battle to the one time she came back with supplies to see Sevika all dressed in the pinkest princess dress she’s seen with a tiara on her head with Isha, dressed in a blue version of the same dress, a larger crown on her own head. That memory still stays.

A week passed, Isha asleep in the fort the pair made. How could she? How could this kid feel comfortable enough to trust Jinx, to sleep in the same room.

At that moment, Jinx knew she would do anything for that kid, the one who cared for her in return of her care.

From the sidelines you watched. You guess you found your ticket for a better Zaun. You didn’t know if she knows you’re there or not, stalking her throughout everything.

When Sevika gathered up the undercity for a meeting, to unite everyone, you knew of the events that were likely to occur. You were always watching everyone, and by everyone, you meant it. From Caitlyn Kiramman, the new sherif, Violet, who is now a drunk, and Jinx.

Isha has already seen you watching them a few times, to make sure she doesn’t inform Jinx you’ve been bribing her with some of the toys that you stole from Topside. You didn’t know what kids like so you started leaving little notes behind, asking, and she would write in an answer.

You awaited one of the outcomes you expected out of the people who gathered up, all at Vander’s statue. The first one was that Sevika would succeed and the people would riot, would fight. The second would be that the speech would be interrupted by enforcers or something like that.

You stood next to Isha, passing the kid a wind up beetle toy. The kid snuck away from Jinx’s side to attend, whether to draw Jinx herself there or not, the kiddo was there. Her hair was dyed a fresh blue, the clouds drawn onto her.

She nodded to you before sneaking up the statue, the commotion of the Jinxer’s yelling for her was enough to keep her hidden until she released the blue powder, a symbol that drew their attention to her. Sevika sighed as they gradually all held up their hands. Her mechanical one reached up to the sky as well, only to be met with a spear.

“You’re all under arrest.” A bearded man stated calmly, the crowd’s shouting increased as the commotion ensued became more gradual.

Sevika removes the arm, unable to free it. Isha let out a sharp breath, and you knew then you needed to get her out of there before they got to her.

The rioters were pinned down, against the walls, the floors, treated harshly as if they committed that of a grave offense. Isha took the initiative as they were distracted and went to go jump the bearded man, but you got to her first, catching her and throwing a barrage of flames at the man, burning him and those surrounding harshly.

Then the enforcers tackled the two of you. Great.

You were locked away within a different level than the others within Stillwater, the kid was by your side still. Likely, it was because you never let her go. The cell was larger but still barren, on the top floor instead of the bottom. The view was somewhat nice at the very least.

Isha was asleep, using your cloak as a blanket, the toy was hugged to her chest for a comfort needed.

Without the cloak around you, you felt exposed. Looking at yourself, you can only see the monster you become of within yourself, not the girl you once were. From your elbows to the tip of your fingers made proof of your powers, all charred black from the flames they were exposed to.

You sat down next to the cell, a hand on the bar as your thoughts drifted to the memories from that time.

From when you were still human.

You still hear their screams, how that night you were made to be ablaze to atone for your sins. How you set them ablaze in your place. How immortality cursed you because you messed-

The doors to the room the of your cell opened. Standing before you was the girl who you’ve been watching for a long while.

The hand on the bar tightens as the flames start there. Melting a bit of the metallic barrier.

The girl’s eyes widened a bit at the display of magic, shimmer-filled eyes embracing surprise. Jinx hasn’t been surprised much anymore, only mournful. From her sister becoming a blue-belly, to Silco dying at the end of her gun despite being that of a father. She’s full of grief, so ultimately, a sense of surprise is something to be welcomed.

Jinx has long since found herself within the cycle of having those around her die. First it was her parents, then Vander, Mylo, Claggor. She likes to think Violet died that night, replaced by a girl just like her calling herself that same name. Powder died that night as well, yet her soul still clings upon Jinx.

Yet now she has a kid.

And that kid is clinging to you, a fucking fire lady?

She recalls when Sevika came stumbling in, left-armless. Her hair was choppier, a bit burnt on one side, her fresh piercing was torn out of her lip, now covered in a bandage, and smelling like burnt plastic. The rally evidently went bad, horrible even.

She recalls the slight panic, the way Sevika stumbled over her words. Sevika doesn’t do that!

Then the explanation came, and Jinx went paler than her usual pale.

Isha was caught in the arms of a weird fire lady and then was taken to Stillwater.

Then she broke the pair of you out. And now you’re in her hair. You, a total stranger, who seems to not care about her reputation! Why aren’t you cowering in fear or harassing her?

Isha was casually standing beside you before extending her hand. You set down a random action figure and she walks away to the fort the pair share, a bit giddy.

Jinx watches this, albeit confused as it was blatant that Isha knew you. She then breaks the silence, eyes narrowed as she examines you. “So, who the fuck are you?”

Then you told her your name, mortal name.

You haven’t used that name in centuries.

Not since Janna herself saved you from their flames, from their harsh words and claims.

After the declaration of your name, the two of you talked, and talked, for hours.

She was curious of the flames that could protrude from you, how your magic was possible. So you answered as much as you could without having her realize the burden of your spirithood.

You met your martyr, talked with her. Then you enacted your plan.

Time passes with ease once your head is within the clouds.

You and Jinx got along well once the awkward small talk passed, reminders of the war occurring to make the conversation serious. Plans came and went, one accepted, another denied.

Piltover had Noxus in its pockets, Janna’s powers were spiraling, and acts of rebellion spread. Jinxers and others alike were rioting and the enemy was growing ruthless.

You helped the best you could in secret, removing fire from the enemy was easier than planning ultimately. You would help Sevika on occasion, planning out different camps to burn down for an advantage.

The war was well, war. There was violence, some needed, some barely understand within reason.

To be honest, you never understood the outrage within their reactions. Deaths of importance were far too common within Zaun, you should know as you oftentimes helped Janna lead them upon their chosen eternity. Those of Piltover seemed more dramatic than a play within the theater.

Death was a common thing, and it seemed to follow Jinx. You were like that of a moth, feeding upon the chaos that radiates off of her like heat to a flame.

Despite your powers, despite your spiritual self, you were clad within cold, growing numb of the heat. Yet now you felt warmer than ever beside Jinx, Isha was curled into the girl, a stolen toy in her hands.

It made you think of the time you once had a family, one that loved you.

You don’t know if you could call this love, but it certainly felt like more of a family than what you were once given. A plan was sung through the air, the words on your tongue the lyrics.

You felt warm within the arms of the humans, a sympathy of words escaping you.

You would once never believe you could have this, yet you did. The war plan was simpler when said with her hand in yours.

Maybe she wasn’t a Jinx.

[semisolidmind]

For the Lion’s Den AU, what was it like when Wukong and Macaque first met Peaches? Love at first sight? Didn’t really notice her until she did/said something? Did they meet her separately or together?

(i briefly mention how they met in one of the earlier lion's den posts, but i guess i should give it some explanation)

reader attends her first meeting understandably apprehensive. she was told explicitly by azure not to draw too much attention to herself, given the nature of his comrades. he would defend her if needed, of course, but she would have to be prepared for their... disapproval, if it arose. she began to imagine what truly frightening beings may be behind the gilded doors that lead to the council hall.

the three demons already seated at the large table were not at all what reader was expecting.

they were worse.

azure failed to mention that his allies were none other than the dreaded monkey king, the six-eared macaque, and the demon bull king. anyone paying even the slightest bit of attention to local gossip had at least heard of these three; the tales of the bloodshed and ruin that followed in their wake were known across the land.

reader had seen it firsthand when the occasional survivors of their conquests would make their way (bloodied, broken, and burned) into her village begging for shelter.

truly a terrifying band.

even more terrifying was the way reader made accidental eye contact with the monkey king every time she dared to glance upward. she'd look down as soon as his golden pupils shot over to her, but reader could feel them on her for a few moments afterwards. even looking away, she could sense the way his sight would drift over to her every time he would address azure; the seating arrangement (azure on one end of the table, reader right next to him, with the monkey king on the other) didn't give her anywhere to hide.

she had to admit, the simian demon was more... upbeat? than she expected? despite his appearance, he acted not as a conquering warlord meeting with his allies to discuss how best to subdue their enemies, but as a man sharing a table with his friends. he joked, he laughed, he talked about old stories.

and what surprised reader the most... was that the demons around him joined in.

were reader not horribly aware that she sat among some of the most powerful demon lords in the world, she'd have felt as though she were back in her village listening to the farmhands after a hard day's work.

it was unsettling knowing that these were the monsters who had killed many innocent people just like those farmhands, and felt no remorse.

reader couldn't wait for this meeting to be over.

---

wukong couldn't wait for this meeting to be over.

as much as he enjoyed talking with azure and the brotherhood, he was much more interested in the human woman azure had brought with him. he could tell macaque was interested, too; any mortal that could catch the interest of one so goal-driven as azure lion must be something special.

wukong really wanted to know what her deal was. but, as much as he would've liked to call on her during the meeting, he got the feeling she'd freeze in fear if he brought attention to her that way. she looked like she wanted to sink into the floor and disappear.

there were little tears at the corner of her eyes the last time she accidentally looked at him.

...it was kinda adorable.

the monkey king glanced over at his brother, finding him staring at the woman as well; seems he'd had the same idea. it also seemed like reader hadn't noticed macaque looking at her in favor of keeping tabs on wukong (which was kinda flattering; he half-jokingly decided that meant she liked him more).

wukong came up with a spilt-second plan. he hid his mouth behind thoughtfully steepled fingers (he was only pretending to listen to the battle strategies being discussed anyway) and whispered it so that only his ever-vigilant brother could hear him.

once the meeting was over, the brotherhood had dispersed outside to get some fresh air. the monkey king crossed the courtyard, intent on distracting azure. he asked the general to take stock of a recent battle so that he and a nearby scribe could make note of it. though azure was a tad confused (shouldn't they have done that right after the battle happened?), he begins to list off information such as casualties, equipment lost, rations used, etc.

conveniently taking the lion's attention away from his little companion, who seemed to be wandering off toward a grove of fruit trees a ways away from the courtyard.

wukong flicked his tail in a certain way, meaningless to anyone but his brother, who took that as his signal.

the shadowmaster sunk into his namesake as soon as eyes were no longer on him.

wukong will join up with them later, once his side of the plan is complete.

---

macaque usually didn't pay much attention to mortals, aside from when he was killing them.

but the fact that the ever-so-honorable (more like hypocritical) azure lion had a little mortal woman at his side? well...that was certainly interesting.

macaque knew that azure was much gentler when it came to human commoners, letting them escape before raiding their towns. the shadowy simian found it amusing that the lion believed he was being merciful; a crowd of defenseless humans with nowhere to go, out in the wilderness? they were basically a demon buffet. and if demons didn't get them, wild animals or the elements would.

deciding to keep that observation in his back pocket for the next time azure nagged him about killing villagers, macaque stepped out of the shadows. the human sat a short distance away, leaned back against a flowering tree. it looked like she was admiring the scenery, completely unaware of him.

what did azure call her...? reader?

hm. azure could've picked anything to give her as a protective pseudonym, and he chose that? wonder what that could possibly say about her. she doesn't really look the academic type.

although, now that he's able to see her a little closer...

perhaps the six-eared demon could understand why the lion was taken with this human, at least physically. she's pretty, she's got nice proportions...but if looks were all that mattered, there's definitely more outwardly attractive humans to choose. her appearance can't be all there is. so, macaque decides to speak to her.

he calls out, casually asking her how she's enjoying the view. she startles and begins to rush out apologies and promises that she didn't mean to come here, she didn't realize she wasn't supposed be here, she didn't mean any harm by it, she'll leave—

macaque laughs, genuinely. she definitely used to be a servant or lower class, no one of any sort of status would apologize just for being somewhere. he goes and sits himself down next to her before she can stand and run away.

he can practically feel her trembling—oh. oh, she's starting to tear up a little...but she's putting on such a brave face.

macaque's pupils dilate a little.

she's just too precious.

after assuring her she's not in trouble, he asks her about herself; where'd she come from, what was her life like before, how did she meet azure?

now that was an interesting story. she actually nursed the stupid cat back to health, despite the fact that he's a big, scary demon? she's brave, he'll give her that. her story would certainly explain why azure took a shine to her. macaque jokingly asks reader if she regularly took demons in, or if azure was just a special case—because he really wouldn't mind being taken care of by her, he says flirtatiously. reader laughs a little at that.

the demons' six ears twitch. he likes that sound, he decides.

macaque can tell reader's getting more comfortable with him. she's opening up, even joking back at him. the attractive blush on her face makes him want to tease her more. the darker-furred demon finds that he likes it when she flusters at a compliment.

he kinda...doesn't want to stop talking with her. it's so easy, like he's always known her.

of course, that's when wukong shows up.

---

wukong had managed to sit through all of azure lion's report without falling asleep, which was an accomplishment all on it's own. afterwards, he managed to get yellowtusk on a long-winded lecture on...something or other, which he always insisted his brothers sit for.

having successfully trapped azure and peng in a manners-mandated lesson (one he knew would keep them for a good while; once the old elephant got started talking, he was difficult to stop), wukong excused himself to "check on dinner preparations." he sped off on his cloud toward where the kitchens were, intent on making a u-turn where the others couldn't see.

if azure wanted to follow, he'd have to interrupt his brother; something wukong knew he'd be hesitant to do.

with that taken care of, the simian ruler quickly tracked his little mark, finding her and his brother under a flowering peach tree. deciding to eavesdrop on their conversation, he stepped gently from his cloud onto the branches above them.

after a moment listening to them (and getting a little jealous that mac had managed to get her to laugh, which was a pretty sound he wanted aimed at him), wukong swung down, shaking some flower petals free, landing gracefully in a crouch at reader's feet. he cheekily apologizes for "dropping in" so unexpectedly.

at her frightened gasp and backpedal, wukong rushes to reassure her he means no harm. he's just curious, he wants to hear her story too, honest! he keeps his tone gentle and playful, and attempts to be as non-threatening as possible (which is tough, since he knows his reputation precedes him).

when reader finally manages to speak (thanks to a little encouragement from macaque), wukong perks up. she doesn't seem as scared of his brother anymore at least, which is a very good sign. as she tells her story, he takes in her features up close.

after hearing how she cared for azure, wukong unknowingly echoes his brother's earlier sentiment; he kinda wants reader to take care of him, too.

he sees how her eyes shine with dewy unshed tears, her face flushed at the demons' proximity (they're both in her space, macaque practically leaning against her shoulder and wukong sitting so close in front that their knees were touching). he notices the way the dappled sunlight hits her skin, the way her lashes frame her eyes. he notes the way loose peach blossom petals decorate her hair. he has to stop himself from reaching out to tuck the little strands that have escaped her updo back into place.

wukong finds himself becoming a bit enamored. his tail curls a bit, and his smile becomes gentler the longer he looks at her.

after talking with her for a while and sharing his and macaque's own stories, wukong realizes that they've been gone for a few hours; the sun is beginning to set, the grove taking on a golden hue. they should probably actually go check on dinner, and (regrettably) return reader to azure.

buuuuut....maybe not right away.

wukong offers reader a tour of the stone palace before she leaves.

---

reader didn't know what was happening.

why was she able to speak with these— these murderers so easily? she should be running away, she should be excusing herself back to azure's side as politely and quickly as she could!

but...but she was having fun. she was having a friendly chat with the monkey king and six-eared macaque of all demons—and laughing, for heaven's sake.

though most of it stemmed from her fear of offending them, the fact that she's speaking with them at all feels like a betrayal of her race. these two, on their own, had killed hundreds, possibly thousands of humans. they could change their minds about playing nice at any moment.

but—but in this light, in this context...they were almost like any ordinary men. were it not for their obviously demon appearances (though reader couldn't say the two were unattractive; the soft glow of the evening light did them many favors), their status, their bloody history—reader could consider them good company.

thinking about it made her want to cry, like she'd been on the verge of the entire time she'd been on this mountain. she wanted to go home and have that cry in the privacy of her bedchambers.

so when the monkey king (he insisted she call him wukong) offered to take her on a tour of the palace, reader thoroughly considered refusing, politeness be damned. she should really just go back to the monster she knows, not run off with one she doesn't.

however, she was curious about what the rest of the cave looked like. she and azure had entered through the massive water curtain, been lead through a large foliage-infested pavilion full of wukong's chattering simian subjects, into the reception hall, and then immediately into the council room. she hadn't gotten to see much, but what she did see she considered very beautiful.

reader, through her anxiety, had marveled at everything she saw. flower fruit mountain was so...alive compared to camel ridge. she preferred it here, at least in that way.

maybe...maybe going on a little tour wouldn't be so bad. it'd give her an excuse for her absence from azure's side, for one (though it wasn't like she was doing anything wrong by not being next to her kidnapper every second). he could stand to not have her near for a few more hours. plus, how could he say no to something as innocent as a tour? and if the eager look on the monkey king's face along with the coaxing smile on macaque's were any indication, they probably weren't going to take "no" for an answer.

well, reader thought in a resigned manner, she'd already gotten this far. what was the harm in spending a little more time with these two?

[usedtobethelegendcreator]

Alright, time to fix some common misconceptions about Alastor! (I WILL elaborate more if asked or contradicted)

1. Alastor is NOT power-hungry:

He outright says that he’s hungry for freedom in his solo. If that doesn’t convince you, I don’t know what will. If I need to break down every thing he says for that to get across, I will.

2. People DID notice he was gone and DID care:

Zestial says, in the third episode, that there were rumors about:

A. Where he’d been (in holy arms)

B. His involvement with Charlie and the hotel

And if there were rumors about him, well, someone must have been wondering. Do you really think Vox would want people thinking of Alastor? Have you forgotten that, yes, THE INTERNET EXISTS in the show? He’s their resident cryptid, of course they were wondering.

3. Oh, and speaking of Zestial—he and Alastor ARE NOT ENEMIES:

Zestial approaches Alastor in the street and immediately starts making small talk. Zestial says “I do revel in screams.” And who has a history of broadcasting screams on the radio? Alastor. Pretty much everything Zestial says in this conversation gives off “He’s my Special Little Guy” vibes. The way Zestial moves around when he says “Thou hath been nought but an enigma since thy manifested in this realm!” says it all.

4. He is NOT manipulating EVERYONE:

Was. Was no one listening to Rosie?

“And ol’ Alastor has never done me wrong before!”

“If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that words are cheap—but actions, they speak the truth.”

Is no one connecting these two statements? Alastor actually has a genuine friend that he’s never betrayed before, and STILL people want to think he’s scheming 100% of the time. A Radio Demon that bleats when manhandled is a Radio Demon too happy to scheme, and Rosie knows that.

And as for Niffty, people are really underestimating the strength of a relationship based on being the same flavor of crazy. If there’s any adoptive father-daughter relationship in that hotel, it’s Alastor and Niffty. “But he’d be a horrible father figure because he believes in corporal punishment”—tell that to the lady that loves pain and bad boys. Her perspective would be “Don’t threaten me with a good time!”

5. He didn’t mean everything he told Charlie in HGD, and NOT for the commonly given reason:

He was looking at Lucifer because, uh, Lucifer was already speaking? And Alastor’s eyes follow movement and voices? Even when he’s not pissing off the King of Hell? I mean, his eyes followed Charlie’s hand when she gestured to Mimzy later in the episode, when he arguably wasn’t in any danger of being perma-killed at all.

Now, I’m not saying he meant all of the things he said. Not at all. Because of this face he makes as he’s saying “child”:

6. His situation with Husk is NOT the same as Angel’s:

Why. Why is everyone forgetting that Husk said “I sold my soul to save my power”. And yes, I know Alastor is a VERY good manipulator, but he can’t exactly hide his reputation. Even if he could, there are still multiple posters up saying “DO. NOT. FUCK. WITH. HIM.” If you really think Husk was stupid enough to think “Oh, but he won’t do that to ME”, well, that’s on you.

Husk was already losing everything he had, without Alastor’s help, and he knew damn well that Alastor was the Radio Demon. In the end, it takes two to play a game of cards.

7. Alastor has Mommy issues:

Listen, just because he’s a Mama’s boy doesn’t mean his mother was a good person. I know it’s a common headcanon that his father was the abusive one, but have we ever considered that Alastor might have followed in his mother’s footsteps? Are we sure she’s in Heaven? Because if the company he keeps (Rosie, Mimzy, and Niffty) says anything, it says “This guy gravitates to dangerous women like a planet in the Sun’s orbit.”

After all, wouldn’t it just be so sweet if his mother taught him everything he knows?

[moog-rt]

GO TO HELL [ch. 4]

[Lucifer Morningstar x Fem!Reader]

Previous: Chapter Three

➨ Chapter Four

Next: Chapter Five

Premise:

You love your friends. You really do. But sometimes it needs reminding when one of them accidentally sends you to Hell.

Despite falling into the hands of Hell’s loveliest princess, finding a way back to the world of the living proves difficult as you tiptoe around its king.

A/N: shout out to my very own "power bottom at rock bottom" (aka my roommate) for harnessing her inner Angel Dust and feeding into some of his dialogue.

If you'd prefer to read on Ao3, here is the link:

Otherwise, enjoy!

♡ ♡ ♡

CHAPTER FOUR

The car ride home was mostly silent and incredibly tense.

You also couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched. When you looked around to sate your paranoia, you found nothing suspicious and whittled it down to the anxiety having your face plastered across every news channel in hell.

On your way out of her father’s manor, you decided to fill Charlie in about your hands and cheek. She said it was a gamble whether her dad would react well to your being human or not. Being neutral to it, however, was something she would not have imagined. She was just relieved that you were alright. 

She theorized that he may have assumed you were just wearing face paint for ‘shits and giggles’ (your words, not hers). There were some demons in Hell that did have skin tones similar to when they were human, so it wouldn’t be too outrageous for you to, as well.

Though it would be no surprise if he jumped to the conclusion that you were human due to your being televised all over Hell the day prior.

Not knowing where his head was at was going to kill you.

But worrying about that wasn’t going to get you anywhere. Charlie believed you two had searched everywhere in her old place that was likely to hold the key to you getting home. To your relief, the likelihood of returning was slim to none.

There was no need to stress over her father figuring you out since you wouldn’t have to risk running into him again.

The only thing you needed to focus on was getting those godforsaken cobwebs off the chandelier in the hotel foyer.

Vaggie was able to get the place mostly cleaned up in the time you were gone, but there were still a few things left that you were able to help with. After all they had done for you, this was the least you could do for them in return.

As you climbed back down the ladder, you saw Charlie pacing and muttering to herself. Even though you only met her recently, you knew how much the hotel and her plan to redeem sinners meant to her.

If this didn’t go well, she would absolutely take it to heart. She seemed like the type to barricade herself in a room to sulk for weeks on end. Or maybe bawl her eyes out whilst shoveling heaping spoonfuls of ice cream down her own throat.

Probably both.

“You know, this place is really coming together,” you said as you walked up to her.

She paused to face you.

“You think so?” she asked, glancing around the foyer in search of anything in need of tending. “Gosh, what if he doesn’t like the color scheme, or—or the motifs? What if he decides he isn’t interested in redemption at all?”

“Hey,” you said to get her attention as you leaned back into her view. “If he weren’t interested in what you’re offering, he wouldn’t be coming by to check things out. And I really don’t think your choice in décor will be what turns him away.”

You chuckled a bit as you glanced at the odd horse statues and slightly tattered wallpaper. It wasn’t modern or trendy, but it did have character. That was for sure.

She nodded with a far-off gaze, ruminating on your words.

“Even if he does decide that this isn’t for him—though I don’t think that will happen—there are so many people down here! I find it hard to believe that you won’t find some who are interested,” you continued. “Think about all the souls that believed they’d be going to Heaven but ended up here instead. They’d probably give up an arm and a leg to be redeemed.”

Her shoulders slacked, and her back loosened as she released a deep breath. Looking back at you, her face appeared more relaxed.

“Yeah…you’re totally right,” she said with a soft smile. “We just need to be patient.”

“I think this guy would be stupid not to accept your offer.” You bumped her arm playfully as you went to continue tidying up.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw her smile and walk off, presumably to do the same.

Everyone was putting the final touches on everything when there was a knock on the front door. You paused in the middle of sliding the sofa across the room so you could get a look at whoever was there.

Charlie and Vaggie looked at each other in surprise.

“I told him to text or call before showing up,” Vaggie grumbled, running a hand through her bangs as she went to answer the door.

He was quite…tall.

You had forgotten their appearances could vary so much. Charlie, her father, and Vaggie were relatively similar to a regular person, despite some slight cosmetic differences. This guy, however, had an extra set of limbs and was covered head to toe in what looked like fur. 

Upon closer inspection, he also had what appeared to be three additional pairs of eyes underneath his primary ones.

Was he supposed to be a bug?

You shuffled forward as Charlie introduced herself. She had fixed up your makeup once you returned, so there was nothing to worry about regarding your own appearance. You had double and even triple-checked beforehand.

“This is it?”

“Uh…yes?” Charlie said meekly with her hands clasped in front of her chest.

He gave the foyer a hard once-over.

“Eh, anything’s betta’ than my current digs,” he said with a shrug and started walking around. “You got drinks?”

“No? The point of redemption is to stop engaging in sin,” Vaggie stated, crossing her arms. “Which means cutting out drugs?”

“You’re kiddin’ me,” he said as his body slumped. “What the hell am I supposed to do then? Play checkers?”

“Ooh, Checkers would be a fun way to break the ice!” Charlie sang, clapping her hands together.

This earned her a blank look from the new guest.

“Aha…” she laughed awkwardly at the bland response, then turned to gesture at you. “Well, this is our current resident! We have faith that she will be redeemed very soon.”

You gave a wide smile as you were being shown off. Should you strike a pose? Put your hands on your hips and puff your chest out in pride?

You didn’t mind being a fake example of a sinner-gone-good to help her out. It was the least you could do at this point. Plus, when you finally got the hell out of there, you could all play it off as you being ‘redeemed’.

“Yup, yup. Sin-free life has been pretty great,” you said, crossing your arms.

The guy already seemed exasperated. Vaggie was right when she said he was more interested in free rent than redemption itself.

“What did you say your name was again?” you asked in an attempt to keep the conversation from dying out before it had even started.

He perked a bit and plastered on a sultry smirk.

“Angel Dust,” he said as he swiped a hand through his hair(?) (head fluff?). “If you’re interested in gettin’ to know me betta’, I’ve got a nice collection of videos I can refer ya to.”

“No,” Vaggie groaned. “He’s a pornstar.”

Your eyebrows shot up.

“I mean, more power to you,” you shrugged, and he snickered.

“Wasn’t expectin’ that sorta career choice to fly with someone aspirin’ to cross through them pearly gates.” He tilted his head as he eyed you carefully, leaning down slightly to be more at your eye level. 

“What makes you think that?” you asked, raising your chin. “In my opinion, a redeemable gal like myself should be respectful of other’s bodily autonomy.”

“Last I checked, the pious types weren’t so down with cock-suckin’ hoes. I mean,” he paused and smirked, “some of ‘em were down with us cock-suckin’ hoes, but they did their darndest to pray that shit away afterward. The guilts part of the kink.”

Vaggie’s stance tensed more and more with each word that came out of his mouth. You were pretty sure her eye was twitching.

“Good people are accepting people!” Charlie exclaimed, throwing her arms out.

“You ain’t ever have to deal with the living, sugar-tits,” Angel said, draping himself over the couch in a way you were sure would be put on the front cover of a Playboy magazine. “But sure.”

You all began a short tour of the hotel much like the one you got when you first arrived. This time, however, Charlie was really trying to sell her redemption plan to him. She explained the terms of their deal. He would refrain from acts of sin, such as violence, drugs, yada-yada, and he could stay there for free.

As you began filing out of one of the available, move-in-ready rooms, you noticed Angel pause. He was looking at the ground with a blank expression, clearly contemplating something. You assumed he was weighing the pros and cons of Charlie’s offer, but you were no mind reader.

After showing off most of the relevant parts of the hotel, you gathered back in the entryway. Charlie stared Angel down expectantly, waiting in suspense for his decision.

She was overjoyed when he finally agreed.

“There’s no harm in tryin’, I guess.” He shrugged shooting a half-lidded smirk. “But I ain’t makin’ no promises that I’ll be the paragon of redeemability. I ain’t that type of model.”

When he left, he said he had to clear some things with his boss first and then he would start this whole ‘redemption thing’.

The three of you had a miniature celebration—juice, soda, and popcorn to go along with eager chatter—before you decided to address the stack of books you had hauled back to the hotel.

The evening was going swimmingly thus far, and you hoped that good luck would carry on to the very end of the night. Somewhere in that pile was your key to getting home. Your fingers were crossed that you would be sleeping in your own cozy bed that night.

You could finally take up your own offer on a nice hot bubble bath and let it soak away all the stress that had stockpiled within your body.

Sitting in a circle around the books, you began sifting through them.

Your hope dwindled bit by bit with every one you flipped through and set aside. They had everything to do with the living world except for the means of getting there.

Once the last book was deemed useless, you sat in sullen silence. A sort of emptiness settled within your chest.

If that was your best shot at returning, what else was there?

“Okay…that’s okay!” Charlie said in an attempt to lighten the mood. “We just have to try something else. Vaggie, you said you knew people who had access to Earth, right?”

“I said I knew of people,” she corrected. “But I did do a little bit of digging while you were out, and I might have a few leads?”

“Oh, perfect!” Charlie chirped, sitting straight up with her hands on her knees. “How about we look into those tomorrow then?”

You and Vaggie both nodded because what else were you supposed to do? You didn’t really have the option of giving up in this situation. Your life wasn’t going to wait on hold forever. It probably wasn’t waiting at all.

At this point, two full days would have passed since you ‘disappeared,’ but living alone makes it harder for people to notice that sort of thing. You doubted Devon would have reported it since that would likely result in them getting into even deeper shit (in addition to the can of whoop-ass you’d release onto them once you made it back).

And you knew better than to put any amount of faith into Jack. You were sure he noticed your absence. You had the texts to prove it. But he seemed to be convinced you were giving him the cold shoulder, which would most likely result in him pretending he didn’t give two flying fucks about you.

Fuck that bitch.

♡

You wouldn’t say you slept like a baby that night, but you sure did sleep. You slept with the weight of despair threatening to overtake you with each failed attempt of finding a way back home.

And you know what?

It wasn’t half bad. Would you recommend it to someone else? No, not really. But you couldn’t tell them it was terrible.

Wiping the sleep from your eyes, you padded your way down the grand staircase. It was nice not having to wake up early to get all done up, but you still felt groggy. Possibly from sleeping too much.

You also appreciated being able to spend more time in the pajamas you were given, because good lord were they comfy.

Charlie and Vaggie let you know last night that they’d be leaving earlier in the morning to talk to the folks Vaggie believed might be able to access the living world. You stayed behind because you all agreed that dragging you through public in a not-so-durable disguise was a disaster waiting to happen.

However, they planned to be back in time for Charlie’s father to visit.

He had called her the previous night—just before you were all about to go your separate ways—to let her know he wanted to stop by. She told him he could drop by in the afternoon, and that was that.

You planned to coup yourself up in your room for the duration of his visit. You would rather die than address what had happened with the paint. If he had any questions regarding that, he could direct them towards his daughter. Thank you and goodnight (love you, Charlie! Muah!).

There was nothing to do until Charlie and Vaggie returned, but you still wanted caffeine or anything that could clear your brain fog.

They had stocked up the fridge and ‘pantry’ a bit more since you arrived, and Angel would likely move in any day now so there was also that to consider. Yet it was still a gamble on whether or not you could find something appealing.

You kneeled down in front of the fridge and began rummaging through your options.

Mysterious leftovers?

No.

Artichoke Hearts?

Eh…for breakfast? Probably not.

Coconut Milk?

No… You were surprised they even had coconuts in Hell. Unless, of course, they had sinners that manifested as coconuts, then you reckon they could milk—

No, absolutely not.

You were thinking about settling on a popsicle when you heard a knock at the front door.

Nobody should have been stopping by yet. Charlie’s dad wouldn’t be there until later, and you guys weren’t expecting anyone else. It could possibly be Angel, but you doubted he already spoke to his boss considering it was still morning.

The stained-glass doors didn’t disclose much about your surprise visitor. They were merely a shadowy figure, distorted by the odd shapes and colors.

Regardless of who it could be, you needed to hide or at least find a way to get back upstairs without being seen.

Slowly rising to your feet, you locked onto a rather large crate near the edge of the entryway.

You wouldn’t have to cross in front of the door to get there, which was ideal. Even though you knew the person on the other side couldn’t see you clearly, you preferred they not know you were there at all. Once you were at the crate, you could easily make your way around the room undetected.

Just as you were about to slip around it, you heard the front door creak open.

“Hello~” sang a familiar voice.

You hastily dodged behind the crate, your feet sliding slightly underneath you due to the new socks you had been gifted by your hosts. Thankfully, you were able to stabilize yourself before falling into anything.

Your heart was pounding away in your chest.

What was he doing here so early?

You pressed your back against the crate as you carefully sat down to wait for him to pass. Listening to his footsteps crossing the room was doing nothing to soothe your nerves. It was clear that he was in no rush to move on through the hotel. You could hear him as he sauntered around the foyer, pausing every once in a while before continuing on.

If he was taking in the sights, it was only a matter of time before he got to your side of the foyer.

You had to get out.

Taking a deep breath, you hesitantly peeked around your hiding spot to see where he was and whether he was looking your way.

To your relief, Charlie’s father was investigating a portrait on the wall opposite of you.

You wasted no time creeping across the floor to take cover behind the tattered old reception area. There was a body-length mirror resting against the wall just a few feet away that would give you a relatively good view of where he was.

As you were about to lean close enough to see through the mirror’s reflection, you heard him begin to hum just a few feet away. You scrambled to get beneath the desk.

How did he get so close so fast?

You understood the guy wasn’t human, but still. You were able to hear his footsteps clear as day up until that point. He shouldn’t know you were there; you were being so quiet…

Holding your breath, you waited for him to put some distance between the two of you. When you felt he was far enough away, you slowly scooted to the other side of the desk where you could hopefully get a view of the mirror.

Hearing him tampering with something, so you took the opportunity to glance at the mirror’s reflection.

He was prodding at one of the broken columns, testing its stability, it seemed. And his back was facing you. Perfect.

Glancing around the edge of the reception desk, you could see that the stairs weren’t too far away. It was a pretty open area, however, so you wondered if it would be better to beeline it down the adjacent hall instead.

Figuring that was likely the safer option, you checked the mirror once more to make sure his back was still turned.

You met his gaze in the reflection, and your eyes went wide as his lips curled into a wicked grin.

Fuck.

In a panic, you threw yourself out of view and knocked your head into the desk’s edge. The collision was certainly loud enough for him to hear, but you kept your pained whine quiet as you cradled your temple.

Your train of thought was quickly growing fuzzy, unsure of what to do or where to go.

Was it best to run?

What if he was faster?

Would your chances be better if you found another place to hide?

Probably not… He already knew where you were, and you weren’t sure where else you could even go.

All you knew was that you couldn’t stay where you were. If his eyes were still trained on the mirror, you would probably be better off going back the way you came. Maybe there was a gap in the crate that you could worm through to hide. It would be like you disappeared.

You turned back in that direction, and as you were about to dart back to the safety of your original hiding spot, two legs stepped in front of you.

You gasped, sliding to a halt just before you could crash into him.

Charlie’s father slowly crouched down to your level as you tilted your head to look up at him, eyes as wide as saucers. His smile was wide, showing off his large, pointed teeth.

“What do we have here?”

Next Chapter

♡ ♡ ♡

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[apoloadonisandnarcissus]

Galadriel x Sauron: One Royal Couple to Rule Them All

Many fellow fans don’t understand why Galadriel would ever join Sauron, of her own free will, in his plan of world domination.

To me, this due to two things:

Whitewashing of Galadriel’s character and refusing to see how much she craves absolute power. There are so many bad takes about her character, it’s hard to address them all in here. I’ll just say she’s not the “Virgin Mary” of Tolkien lore; she’s not a “fairytale princess”, nor a “damsel in distress”;

Misunderstanding of Sauron’s plans. Even if you aren’t familiar with Tolkien lore nor have read the books, “Rings of Power” already explained what Sauron’s goals are, and what he wishes to accomplish.

Sauron’s Masterplan

Let’s start with Sauron’s masterplan. What does he want?

But today, a new age begins. Under me. Your new master. Sauron. And with a new age, I bring a new vision. A path to unconditional conquest. For I seek a new kind of power. Not of the flesh, but over flesh. A power of the unseen world. One we shall use to enslave the peoples of Middle-earth to our very will. Many Orcs will die. But out of the chaos, we will forge a new and perfect order. No longer will we be hunted as the demons who broke Middle-earth, but rather worshipped as the saviors who finally healed it. By bringing its peoples together, to rule them all as one!

From a perspective of Tolkien lore, this speech was a bit over the top, even for Sauron himself. But I understand why the show writers went with this, it’s meant to illustrate that Sauron is evil, and a tyrannical dictator.

Sauron doesn’t see himself as a villain; he thinks he’s the hero, here. Because he’s a demigod and one of the Ainur; he helped shape the world the seeks to dominate. He looks at the ruins of Middle-earth and how the Valar aren’t doing anything to help. He’s the only deity who’s willing to do anything about it. And so, he steps in and makes it his personal mission to rebuild Middle-earth (“heal it”).

He would never call himself “Sauron”, either, because that’s the name the Elves created to mock his own (“Mairon”). And it means “the abhorrent” instead of “the admirable”. He would call himself Tar-Mairon, “King excellent”. But, again, the show had to go with this otherwise casual viewers wouldn’t know who this character is.

This is Adar spelling Sauron’s plan to Galadriel in 2x08. When I first watched this scene I must confess I was confused and thought this could be one of Sauron’s deceptions, actually.

This is Sauron’s masterplan and the reason why he created the “rings of power” (the “power of the Unseen world”) in the first place. But this brings another interesting question; perhaps Adar himself was on board with Sauron’s masterplan of healing Middle-earth until he saw his methods.

Adar, in 1x06, told Galadriel a bit about Sauron's plan, as well, when he reveals to have killed him:

After Morgoth's defeat, the one you call Sauron… Devoted himself to healing Middle-earth, bringing its ruined lands together in perfect order. He sought to craft a power not of the flesh… But over flesh. A power of the Unseen World. He bid as many as he could to follow him far north. But try as he might… Something was missing. A shadow of dark knowledge that kept itself hidden, even from him. No matter how much blood he spilt in its pursuit. For my part… I sacrificed enough of my children for his aspirations. I split him open. I killed Sauron.

Repentant Mairon, himself, already told this to Galadriel in 1x08:

When Morgoth was defeated, it was as if a great, clenched fist had released its grasp from my neck. And in the stillness of that first sunrise, at last, I felt the light of The One again. And I knew if ever I was to be forgiven... That I had to heal everything that I had helped ruin.

Mairon wish to “heal” Middle-earth comes from his own desire to escape Morgoth’s bounds. That’s the reason behind the “heal yourself” quote from 2x08. Mairon wants to kill “Sauron”, as well, and erase every trace of his former master from the world.

But he can’t, nor can he escape his bounds to Morgoth, because, like Tolkien wrote, they are too strong (“Rings of Power” suggested there might have been some blood oath/binding involved) and he falls back into evil. And this is why he gets so triggered when Celebrimbor calls him "shadow of Morgoth", and he snaps, and kills him in a rage fit:

But Sauron regrets this in the next minute, and he cries. Because this is not him, this chaotic destruction is not who he is. He’s a control freak, a mastermind, always planning and scheming, he’s patient, and organized to the point of obsession. These are Morgoth’s bounds and corruption of him reaching the surface. And when he looks up all he sees is Morgoth.

Sauron’s masterplan is the unite everyone on Middle-earth; all kingdoms and all races (Elves, Dwarves and Men) to live together in peace and harmony. No more wars, no more suffering, no more pain; only a world of beauty, order and perfection. The qualities he was created to have by Eru himself, and his contributions during the Ainulindalë, when he helped shaped the world alongside the Valar and the other Maiar. This is why he tells Celebrimbor this, in 2x07: I see the end, Celebrimbor. So clearly. I have seen it from the moment I awoke.

The problem here isn’t his masterplan per say: this is not an evil plan by any means. But he was corrupted by Morgoth, and his ways are also corrupted. This is how he self-deceives himself. Mairon’s love for order becomes a obsession with domination; and Sauron knows he has to become a tyrant and to enslave everyone to his will, in order to create his perfect world.

To him, the end justifies the means, and he’s willing to use chaos and destruction (Morgoth) to achieve his masterplan. And this is perfectly embodied in this quote from him, in 2x01: “out of the chaos, we will forge a new and perfect order”.

Where does Galadriel fits in all of this?

He thinks she’s the missing piece. Sauron believes her “light” will keep him in check, and somehow control his bounds to Morgoth. But as I’ve discussed before in this post, her “light” isn’t really hers, it’s the light of the Two Trees of Valinor, and it shines on every Elf that was born during the Years of the Trees, in Valinor.

It’s Galadriel’s beauty that blinds Sauron. And why is that? Because she’s the physical form, the materialization, of everything he was designed to love by Eru himself. I already talked about this in this post. This tells us their attraction is not only spiritual (the “they are higher beings” nonsense), but also physical (sexual).

The reason why Mairon was attracted to her in the first place was because Galadriel, unconsciously, reminded him of Morgoth. Galadriel and Morgoth share the same chaotic energy; the same arrogance, greed and lust for power. This is yet another one of the ways Mairon self-deceives himself; he thinks Galadriel would allow him to escape Morgoth’s bounds, but it's the other way around. On a unconscious level, he’s always seeking his former master. And that's why he wants to serve her, and to bind himself to her.

And we, the audience already saw him pitching this desire to Galadriel herself, in 1x08:

Sauron: This is it. You bind me to the light. And I bind you to power. Together, we can save this Middle-earth. Galadriel: Save? Or rule? Sauron: I see no difference.

And this blood binding is exactly what he does in 2x08, using Morgoth’s crown; the dark magic artifact that’s already infused with his own blood because Adar used it to destroy his previous physical form.

This is a silent conversation happening between them, through their new bound. And Sauron probably showed her many things, namely: the connection they shared in Season 1 was true and real because he “felt it, too” (and not a deception on his part like Galadriel believed); his proposal was honest (he would, indeed, make her the Queen of Middle-earth), and his entire masterplan.

But Sauron is not only an expert on deceiving others, but himself, too (like Celebrimbor told him, in 2x07). Meaning, in his mind, Galadriel as the “Queen of queens” would be a good thing. Except it wouldn’t. She would be far worse than him, with the power he would provide her with.

Which leads me to the next point:

Galadriel Lust for Ultimate Power

To understand this, we need to go back to the source: Tolkien. What does he says about Galadriel?

[Galadriel] had no peace within. Pride still moved [her] when, at the end of the Elder Days, the final overthrow of Morgoth, she refused the pardon of the Valar for all who had fought against him, and remained on Middle-earth. Unfinished Tales [of Númenor and Middle-earth]

A penitent: in her youth [Galadriel] a leader in the rebellion against the Valar (the angelic guardians). At the end of the First Age she proudly refused forgiveness or permission to return [to Valinor]. She was pardoned because of her resistance to the final and overwhelming temptation to take the [One] Ring for herself. Tolkien, Letter 320

Galadriel, in Tolkien lore, is a “penitent”, a “repentant sinner”, because she turned her back on literal heaven (Valinor) due to her pride and her greed for power (wanting a kingdom of her own), and for this she was banished by the Valar: Tolkien work is infused with Christian doctrine whenever people chose to ignore or not, it’s still there. And this is true in “Rings of Power”, too, only her desire for power is connected with her desire for Sauron, in the show.  

Now, to understand her connection with Sauron, and want she truly wants, we need to look at “The Mirror of Galadriel” chapter in “Fellowship of the Ring”, the first book of “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy. Overall, the scene with the Mirror is somewhat similar to the Peter Jackson adaptation, only Sam is also there in the book version, and he wants to see Elf magic.

This takes place thousands of years after the “Rings of Power” timeline, and Sauron has been defeated, at least, 5,000 years ago. 

The last night before the Fellowship departs Lothlórien, Galadriel offers Frodo and Sam the opportunity to look into her Mirror, and they accept.

With water from the stream Galadriel filled the basin to the brim, and breathed on it, and when the water was still again she spoke. “Here is the Mirror of Galadriel,” she said. “I have brought you here so you may look in it, if you will.” The air was very still, and the dell was dark, and the Elf-lady beside him was tall and pale. “What shall we look for, and what shall we see?” asked Frodo, filled with awe. “Many things I can command the Mirror to reveal,” she answered. “But the Mirror will also show things unbidden, and those are often stranger and more profitable than things which we wish to behold. What you will see, if you leave the Mirror free to work, I cannot tell. For it shows things that were, and things that are, and things that yet may be. But which it is that he sees, even the wisest cannot always tell. Do you wish to look?” [...] "Remember that the Mirror shows many things, and not all have yet come to pass. Some never come to be, unless those that behold the visions turn aside from their path to prevent them. The Mirror is dangerous as a guide of deeds.”

Sam sees the “Scouring of the Shire” (which was cut from the Peter Jackson adaptation). Frodo sees several visions, and the last one is the Eye of Sauron itself.

“Do not touch the water!” said the Lady Galadriel softly. The vision faded, and Frodo found that he was looking at the cool stars twinkling in the silver basin. He stepped back shaking all over and looked at the Lady. “I know what it was that you last saw,” she said; “for that is also in my mind. Do not be afraid! But do not think that only by singing amid the trees, nor even by the slender arrows of elven-bows, is this land of Lothlorien maintained and defended against its Enemy. I say to you, Frodo, that even as I speak to you, I perceive the Dark Lord and know his mind, or all of his mind that concerns the Elves. And he gropes ever to see me and my thought. But still the door is closed!”

Galadriel then reveals to Frodo that she’s the ring-bearer of Nenya, one of the Three Elven rings of power. And is with the help of its power, she protects the realm of Lórien. However, Nenya is not the only magic at work here, and I think the ring works as an amplifier of Galadriel’s power (like the Mirror itself), and not as the actual “source”. And the protective spell around Lothlórien is something similar to Girdle of Melian, not only because of Nenya's presence, otherwise Galadriel wouldn’t be able to leave her kingdom, ever.

Praising Galadriel as “wise and fearless and fair,” Frodo offers to give the One Ring to her: “I will give you the One Ring, if you ask for it. It is too great a matter for me.”

This is the when Galadriel’s trial begins; she had the intention of test Frodo, and now she’s the one being tested.

Galadriel laughed with a sudden clear laugh. “Wise the Lady Galadriel may be,” she said, “yet here she has met her match in courtesy. Gently are you revenged for my testing of your heart at our first meeting. You begin to see with a keen eye. I do not deny that my heart has greatly desired to ask what you offer. For many long years I had pondered what I might do, should the Great Ring come into my hands, and behold! It was brought within my grasp. The evil that was devised long ago works on in many ways, whether Sauron himself stands or falls. Would that not have been a noble deed to set to the credit of his Ring, if I had taken it by force or fear from my guest?

“And now at last it comes. You will give me the Ring freely! In place of the Dark Lord you will set up a Queen. And I shall not be dark, but beautiful and terrible as the Morning and the Night! Fair as the Sea and the Sun and the Snow upon the Mountain! Dreadful as the Storm and the Lightning! Stronger than the foundations of the earth. All shall love me and despair! She lifted up her hand and from the ring that she wore there issued a great light that illumined her alone and left all else dark. She stood before Frodo seeming now tall beyond measurement, and beautiful beyond enduring, terrible and worshipful.

Then she let her hand fall, and the light faded, and suddenly she laughed again, and lo! She was shrunken: a slender elf-woman, clad in simple white, whose gentle voice was soft and sad. “I pass the test,” she says, “I will diminish, and go into the West, and remain Galadriel.”

They stood for a long while in silence. At length the Lady spoke again. “Let us return!” she said. “In the morning you must depart, for now we have chosen, and the tides of fate are flowing.”

Let's go back to Galadriel’s “dark form”; both adaptations are similar and true to Tolkien’s words:

Sauron: Fair as the sea and the Sun. Stronger than the foundations of the earth [...] Not dark. Not with you at my side.

In place of a Dark Lord you shall have a Queen. Not dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn. Treacherous as the sea. Stronger than the foundations of the earth.

The detail that makes all the difference: Sauron proposal was to make her “a” queen, she’s the one who added him to the deal. They both agreed in placing crowns in each other’s heads.

And she wanted to take Sauron's offer, she craved what he offered her; as she confessed to Celebrimbor, in 2x07:

What prevented her from accepting in 1x08 wasn’t the “tyrant” bit, but believing him to be deceiving her, and his proposal being a mere illusion, and not honest. Because he's "the great deceiver" after all.

This is Galadriel’s true heart's desire. She craves this; ultimate power, and to be worshipped by everyone. That’s the reason why Sauron offered her this, in the first place, and why the One ring will give her the same temptation thousands of years later. Sauron has many glorious titles (“Lord of the Earth”; “Ruler of Middle-earth"; “God-king”, “King of Men”, “King of Kings”), and Galadriel wants them all for herself (“In place of the Dark Lord you will set up a Queen”).

Sauron's offer will haunt her for thousands of years, because that’s what she truly wants, she's *that* power hungry, folks. For that D, too. And, in 2x08, what we saw was the beginning of Sauron’s grouping of Galadriel's mind, for centuries into the future, too:

[thebadgerclan]

Moi Tsar

Pairing: Nikolai Lantsov x reader

Summary:  After the attack on the Spinning Wheel...

Everything had gone wrong so fast.  One second, you’d been watching as Vasily made a drunken speech about your husband and the Sun Summoner, the next, you’d watched him be dismembered.  Your location had been revealed, the Darkling had attacked, and you’d been separated from Nikolai.  The last you’d seen of him, he’d been herding his mother from the ballroom with a shout of, “Protect the Queen!”

You’d tried to fight, to evacuate as many people as you could, but when the Darkling’s shadow monster had struck you and you’d fallen to the floor, your mind shifted toward getting yourself out.  You were dizzy and delirious with pain, but you’d somehow managed to get into the tunnels dug beneath the Spinning Wheel.  Alya, one of Nikolai’s Grisha, was the first person you found, and you had only one question.

“Nikolai,” you gasped.  “Where is Nikolai?  Is he here?  Was he hurt?  Is–”  “I don’t know,” Alya said, taking your arm and leading you to a cot.  “I’m sure he’s fine.”  Tears built behind your eyes, and you felt panic ebbing in.  “He could have been killed,” you said.  “He could be hurt, he could be dying, he–”  “Y/N!”  You fell silent at the cry of your name, however quiet the voice was.

“Y/N!  Y/N, are you here?”  Nikolai was bordering on hysterical.  When he’d gotten his mother out of danger, he’d returned for you, only to find a splatter of blood on the marble where you’d been standing.  “Y/N!  Y/N!”  He scanned every face he passed, and while he was relieved to see his soldiers alive and here, his priority was you.  “Nikolai?”  He froze, praying he hadn’t misheard.  “Nikolai!”  “Y/N!”  He took off running, and when the crowd parted to reveal you doing the same, he let out a sob.  “Y/N!”

You slammed into his chest, wrapping your arms tightly around him, knees giving out.  But Nikolai held you up, clutching you to him.  “Oh my love,” he cried.  “I thought… I didn’t…I…. Saints, I thought….”  “I know,” you managed, lifting your face from his chest to look at him.  “I didn’t know what happened to you, where you were.  I thought I’d lost you.”  Your husband smirked, wiping a tear from your cheek. “Never, my darling.  It’ll take more than a shadow demon to take me away from you.”

“Sir,” came Tamar’s voice.  Nikolai didn’t release you from his vice-like grip, but he lifted his head from your hair.  “Baghra’s arrived.  She wishes to speak with you and Alina.”  Nikolai nodded, sweeping you into his arms and following his Heartrender to a private chamber.  The Grisha teacher was waiting when you arrived, and introductions had hardly been made when a girl with flaming auburn hair and horrific scars entered.

Alina embraced her immediately.  “Oh, Genya,” she whispered, and your husband went rigid.  “Genya?” he asked, gently setting you down.  “Genya Safin?  The Grisha who poisoned the King?”  You looked at the girl before you, unable to imagine this shriveled thing able to pull off regicide.  “Moi tsarevich,” she said, and Tamar corrected; “Moi tsar.  He’s your King now.”  Your gaze flew from Genya to your husband.  The King?  You wracked your brain, trying to remember anything but chaos from the party, but only one thing stood out: Protect the Queen, he’d ordered, but he hadn’t meant his mother, he’d meant you.  You were the Queen now.

Try as you might, you barely heard anything after that.  You were Queen, Nikolai was King.  Both Vasily and Pytor dead in a matter of minutes.  You barely noticed when Alina led Genya from the room, but when Nikolai gently took your hand and sat you on the bed, you snapped to attention.  “Are you alright?” he asked, cupping your face, scanning you for wounds.  “I… I don’t…”  Your husband pulled you into his arms, and you crawled into his lap, pressing your face into his chest.  He smelled like smoke and gunpowder, but beneath it, that unmistakable smell that was your Nikolai.

“You’re the King,” you managed, and Nikolai nodded.  “Yes,” he replied, voice cracking. “I am.”  After a few minutes, you lifted your head, locking eyes with your husband.  “Kolya, I thought you were dead.”  “I thought the same of you,” he said, tightening his hold on you.  Tamar entered, bearing a basin of warm water and a few pieces of cloth, which Nikolai thanked her for, before leaving the two of you alone.

Your husband cleaned the blood and grime from your face, and you did the same for him, all while remaining in his lap.  “What do we do now?” you whispered as Nikolai laid down, pulling you into his arms.  “We leave for Zvedya in the morning,” he said, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear.  “We regroup, and we keep fighting.  For Ravka.  For the future.  For what we love most.”

Nikolai pressed a lingering kiss to your lips, winding his arms around you.  “I love you, my darling,” he whispered, his lips brushing against yours.  “My Y/N, my love, my darling.  I love you so much.  “I love you too, Nikolai,” you replied, nuzzling your face into his chest.  “I love you.”  Exhaustion soon pulled you under, your husband following soon after.  Your sleep was dreamless, and when you woke, it was to Nikolai pressing gentle kisses to your forehead.

“Wake up, lovely,” he coaxed.  “We’re leaving.”  As much as you wanted to burrow under the blankets and pretend that yesterday hadn’t happened, you rose and dressed, shouldering your new mantle as Queen of Ravka.  You’d been attacked, yes, your soldiers wounded, some returned to the Saints, but you would fight on.  With Nikolai at your side, leading your men and women, you would persevere.  And if your country wanted to be a drowning man, then you’d just have to dive in headfirst and save it.

[jazeswhbhaven]

Hi! glad that your request box is open, so it is kinda confirmed in the Halloween event that witches are real and they offer every Halloween and all. So can I request a very powerful witch MC (Leraye is having the time of his life because thunderous sound her magic made when she blasting angels) and very much a researcher at heart, when she knows the concept of Hell, devils, and the entire environment and culture of Hell, she is internally foaming at the mouth because OH her fellow witches are punching the air right now and would kill a bitch to be in her place (I have a headcanons that the first witch has to have some sort of encounter with one of the Kings at some point in the past, has a crush, and made a club with other witches with the same experience as her, someone walks into their girl night and snitched on them, which ruin the fun 🙄). She looked around with a bag of notes to write down everything and would beg to use every library in each nation for her study and research. While she can definitely put a spell on herself to survive in Hell without banging anyone or drinking Minhyeok's nut but she WANTS IT, because who wouldn't? (she is the type to ask for anatomy scientific questions during sex like how demons' horns leak cum? How does it feel in the head when you orgasm?-) She also gets very excited when she knows she can use our demons' power, not only is it a new great thing to study, and would train the fuck out of herself to refine her skills so she could contribute to helping Hell. Anyway, I hope you can write her dynamics with 5 demons bois of your choosing if you accept it, thanks!

Thank you so much for waiting anon! SO this was a lot of detail to work with to understand our Witch!MC, so a lot of apologies if I don't nail everything you mentioned right on the head. BUT let's see if I can at least get her dynamics going.... I'm going to go with your original request of choosing 5 demons both nobles and kings mixed together and I have the perfect one to start off withhhhhh

Asmodeus: His late wife was a witch, so meeting Witch!MC was not only a treat, but nostalgia for this lustful devil. In fact, he's more...toned down around her which surprises everyone even Leviathan when he observes Asmo's behavior. Witch!MC has a natural ability to resist his charms, no magic needed, and can harness his power in order to take down angels with a blink of an eye. One would possibly say...it's even better than any human that once tried to tussle with balancing his power with their own. She takes pride in herself that Asmodeus acts different around her, sometimes even bragging about it within her coven which creates jealously. But it's fine, no other witch would dare lay a finger on her if it meant dealing with the possibility of pissing off one of the Kings, especially Asmodeus. He tries to court Witch!MC, by flirting coyly in person and flirty texts that are vague instead of explicit detail. He even flirts with the other witches of her coven just because that's the way he is, but Witch!MC can tell his heart isn't in it. He just wants her attention.

Satan: Witch!MC's coven resides in Gehenna, just on the outskirts of the busy downtown square in the bustling forest. It's often she runs into Satan when shopping for groceries/etc. This king treats Witch!MC like any one of his citizens, though he does tend to threaten to kick her across the room much less than he does anyone else. In battle with the angels, he only needs one drop of blood from her to go full potential for his power, and she uses that energy to be equal as they both clear waves of angels. Not even the cherubim angels like to fuck around with this duo or they'd end up on their death beds without a proper strategy. Satan is aware that Witch!MC doesn't necessarily need Minhyeok's cum to survive in Hell, and that's what makes him angry most of the time. Though, that also means...she doesn't need devil's essence either so each time she asks him for "alone" time he gets excited about it. Out of all the Kings, she seems to ask him more often than not.

Foras: The reason I chose this particular noble to talk about with Witch!MC is because...she can see through his invisibility power. In fact, she can replicate it easily without even thinking about it. To her it's second nature. This intrigues Foras, but also makes him a bit nervous that it doesn't work on her when it was Leviathan who asked him to spy on her from time to time. Witch!MC knows this too, and she thinks it's funny that Leviathan would feel the need to do so while also acting as if he doesn't care what she does on her own free time. But this is her own little secret with Foras, and it does play into interesting scenarios for when she's feeling..."frisky". Public invisible quickie anyone?

Leraye (since you mentioned him in your request!): It's true, whenever Witch!MC fights in the battles, the crack and boom of her magic reminds Leraye of thunder and he can't help himself sometimes in the heat of the moment. If only he could pull the trigger with just one hand...oh wait...yes he can. One in his pants and the other on the trigger is a dangerous combo. Witch!MC praises Leraye on his kill count after each battle, and they always celebrate together with Paimon at the local pub afterward. You will always see the three of them together celebrating victories, and even if there's not a victory, Witch!MC is there to bring up morale and help heal wounds when there's not a healing devil present. Now when it comes to hanging out with Leraye alone, he's very much like a lost puppy and craves for her attention. She loves this, and also has to often tell Sitri and Satan to back off and leave him alone. Witch!MC has a certain soft spot for him he's willing to do anything for her.

Leviathan: Another king that Witch!MC seems to have an effect on is this jealous devil. If you thought he was envious before, he certainly is now. The minute he saw her, and learned that her coven was based in Gehenna he was immediately trying to convince Witch!MC to come reside in Hades. He would tell others that it's because he feels Gehenna isn't adequate enough, but it's because he recognizes her potential and that he could easily train and mold her skills to work for Hades and be a great asset to Hell. That and well...there's no way he'd let Satan have her all to himself (or any of the kings for that matter). Witch!MC thinks that Levi is very pretty, goregous and often has trouble concentrating around him. But she does her best and shows no shame in wanting to roll around in his bed. She doesn't care much about his empty threats or half-assed insults toward her, because she can pretty much see through it (for the most part since he makes it so obvious).

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

Silly little headcannon:

Demons / sinners can't have salt because it's one of those pure substances that could dispel them.

It's also a punishment for sinners who enjoyed basic flavour in their meals. Other spices can be obtained in some form, more or less, often smuggled across rings from wrath or gluttony where the main farms can be found.

A few people hankering for Spice get The Real Thing - smuggled by the hellborn who went to earth. It was a very expensive desire to cultivate.

And there was always one idiot who thought that the salt thing was just superstition and asked for it. At this point the hellborn no longer argue, just make a vague your funeral statement, and give the item over.

Can it kill them? If you chug the bottle, sure.

Is it similar to drinking bleach? Yeah. Parts start to melt like they're trapped in an acid rainstorm starting from the inside out.

Sometimes it can warp how they reform. And it's a bitch and a half if you get it on your skin... burns like acid and won't stop til you get it all off.

So imagine if you will, that there's a hell alternative, sourced from the oceans of envy in Leviathan's realm. Supposedly off limits and out of reach to sinners because, well, fuck em that's why.

They're meant to be punished and Lucifer was pretty pissed with the whole cohort so he banned their access centuries back. Only Zestial recalls being able to cook with flavour...

Rumours say he ddid it in response to Lillith's rebellion and the inners that inspired it. Others believe, like the foolish romantic things they are, that Lucifer's life became bland without his Queen and wanted the rest of the Sinners to understand his pain, to know what they cost him.

All utter twaddle, really.

No one ever considers that perhaps it's just Like That here. After all... there's a lot of similar things in hell to their earth counterparts -like chimkin and pyork; hellborn dont know any different but sinners do.

That's the cruelty, that they can have something Like but not close enough. And without salt... a lot of those recipes you would eventually cave and try to make, just for a moecule of serotonin in the pits of literal despair... would be off.

Unless you pay for deliveries from another rings' business and the import taxes could bankrupt someone unwary, that is. Despair was a hell of a currency... and didn't the Vees and the other financially minded overlords know it. Not to mention more industrious hellborne.

Or, unless you had Connections.

One of the little thrills of being at the Hazbin Hotel was Charlotte unknowingly gifting the sinners (staff and guests alike) all access to Envy salt. She didn't see the big deal, and was caught off guard when Angel said that having the condiment available for every meal, was better than any rimjob he'd had in the last four decades.

Vaggie had hurled a plate like a discus at the man, aiming to remove his revolting mouth at the neck, but he'd caught it in a spare arm. Grinning at her.

"Admit it toots, you missed it too. Though I'm not sure how cause, seriously, ya whole attitude is salty." Dissolving into dorky laughter as her anger wavered into begrudging amusement.

"Oh shut up. But uh, we still got salt in Heaven, and there's always been some in the hotel... so I never really got a chance to miss it. "

Charlie interjects, confused in the way she had of being sincerely curious and obliviously privileged. "What do you mean? Aunties Levi and Levy sell it cheap to the other rings. Why wouldn't you have salt?"

Sensing a chance to educate and be a bit of a bastard about the king, Alastor interjects. "Why, my dear, haven't you heard your father decreed that Leviathan salt is banned to sinners? Its a silly little punishment designed to distress, because without it a number of meals that remind one of home just miss the mark. Insidious... i would almost be impressed if it was employed by anyone else."

Charlie deflates.

"Chin up, at least there's some here to bring something to the table. Unfortunately the spices are running a tad low so Husker will have to go and see if there's any of our dear hellborn contacts available to pop up to earth for a shopping spree "

"Wait, I can get dad to make us some?"

"And let him poison us? No thank you dear. You would absolutely survive anything he hides in the spice, he would make certain, but you know quite well sinners mean nothing to him."

"Thaaaaaaat's not... entirely true. He wouldn't kill you or make you sick deliberately, I dont think."

"He is the devil my dear Charlotte, and you know he will do anything to keep you safe from whatever he perceives as harm. Including even such innocuous creatures as dear Niffty."

Said sinner was being stopped from eating her plate by Angel and Husk. They were offering nonceramic options to limited success.

"Smiles, little help here?"

"Niffty, do drop that and I shall let you have the liver of the next sinner I hunt. You may adorn it with your beloved ketchup all you wish and I shan't even point out how it ruins the flavour, even once!"

Her pupil expands ominously. She squeals and drops the plate.

"Delightful. Now if you'll excuse me, Im afraid Carmilla wants a meeting with us about ensuring all the weaponry was returned. Vagatha, do you wish to come see your mentor?"

"Not my name..." she grumbles, following after with less hostility than she might have shown previously.

....

Charlie is left to wonder after why her father would make it so hard to cook non-bland foods.

He, after arriving to the dining area with great flair, explains that why not? It's meant to be a punishment. The memory of never quite tasting things the same as they were remembered and the despair of trying anyway was a punishment sinners enforced on themselves.

Charlie snaps that it wasn't okay, and that even little kindnesses like a positive memory of life reinforced through a good meal, could be instrumental for changing a sinner for the better.

Lucifer points out that no amount of paprika sprinkled on a sinner corpse was going to redeem her pet overlord or his friend Rhododendron.

Charlie pushes back saying it just might. How would he know? Had he tried before?

Her father pauses, considering, and she really should have paid attention to that odd expression as he asks if Al put her up to asking.

Charlie rolls her eyes. No, but he did do most of the cooking and he'd mentioned that the spices were low.

Ugh, the fucker was cooking for them? Are they sure it was really pyork and not sinner? Lucifer's disgust was obvious. Of course he'd eaten sinner before, eternity was a long time and you wanted to try new things on occasion. But it wasn't a, you know, hankering. A Need.

Charlie countered easily, if with a thread of frustration in the tone. Yes dad, they were very sure. Al cooked lots of stuff, not just sinner... and hey, even Lucifer had enjoyed some of the meals.

The king had to begrudgingly give him that. He cracks his knuckles, having an awful funny little idea. "Well, if that's the case and you trust him, I suppose theres no choice but to wa-bam! Spices restocked and a few new ones added! Straight from Earth to our pantry... let's see what the snarky fucker thinks about that."

Charlie beams at ber dad, hopeful that someday the pair might be friends... but understanding that it would be a matter of one small concession at a time.

....

Later, after the intrepid duo of Alastor and Vaggie returned from Carmilla's fortress of a territory, having been thoroughly negotiated with for future use of the steel... and royal favour if possible, the pair seem to head tiredly for the main sitting area.

Charlie greets them at the door like a labrador bursting with love for an owner that left an hour ago and they just weren't sure the person was ever coming back. Out of the kindness of her heart, Charlie offers to cook; and the overlord finds he suddenly has a burst of new energy, because no. Not again.

Niffty had just gotten the last attempt off the high vaulted ceilings.

Angel, lounging about on a rare day off, offered to help make something. He was struggling to find non drug and alcohol related activities now he had free time. And you could only play with yourself so many times in a day when it was what you did for work yknow?

Cherri was blowing up his phone with party deets, begging him to come over and play... and he was being so brave about it.

The sound of music filled the kitchen, helping a little. Filling in the gaps in his brain where the Wants crept in with sound. His twitchy hands put to use grabbing out equipment and ingredients as Al instructed.

Cooking was easy enough and soothing for the spider sinner. He cant recall what they were making, just followed instructions to peel and dice and cut as Al did his showmans patter over the music. Some truly insane stories from decades back in Hell and something about a sinner who sounded like Vox absolutely going face first into the pavement. The deer was a riot when he got going, and wasn't aiming his anger at you.

It felt... warm.

Well, hell always was, but this... cooking with someone always reminded Angel of his life before. Cooking was a whole experience if the family was together and had time. That's just how the bonded... well, 'cept dad and arackniss. Idiots got it into their head not to joint he family in the kitchen... as if every other guy in the other Families wasn't proudly cooking upa storm. They should've been embarrassed to miss out!

He notes the now overflowing spice rack and points it out to Al. Angel can't help the small grin as he sees those floofy red ears flick back in obvious agitated indignation, before they are forcefully corrected by the overlord.

Big bad fluffy ass adorable overlord. Betcha Al still thought the rest of the hotel didn't know about his tail... eh, let him keep his fragile sense of dignity. Angel'd trade his four best vibrators for a pat, though. Needed to know if it was anywhere near as soft as it looked.

That he knew was a secret, the kind you didn't snitch about to nobody. Al still didn't seem to realise it was Angel and Husk who'd found him a bloody mess after the new place opened, when that fake smile finally thinned and he'd passed out near his room. Lucky for the stubborn deer that they'd been keeping an eye 'cause Husk (the grumpy softie) felt something was wrong and followed him at a distance. Spooky Jnr (the shadow) had actually been hovering anxiously the whole time and practically came to get the not-so-subtle stalkers when Al had collapsed. They'd dagged the overlord into the new radio tower, yanked off the sodden layers, and given the idiot some actual first aid.

Husk had looked conflicted for a moment, just a fraction of a second there, and Angel kept thinking about if he'd have had the strength to gently clean, stitch and bandage his own overlord if the chance to let them die came up. He wants to think he'd show that same compassion... but Al wasn't Valentino, and thank fuck for that, so Angel knows he'd find a way to smother the moth bastard if he was ever that lucky.

Still, he now knew about the tail. Husk'd played it off like he'd been the only person to help when the near-delirious and panicked deer snapped awake the next morning in his new bed, all trussed up. But he's sure something of the night must have stayed in that red head, because sometimes Al looked at him from the corner of his eyes. Testing him, maybe seeing if Angel wanted something from him, or was going to use it against him.

Sure, the sinner was a bit of a muck up, and he'd killed for fun, but like... no one important. Not friends, not family, not... whatever these weirdoes in the hotel had come to be to him. But he couldn't breach the gap to tell Al he was safe with Angel, because that'd be saying th quiet bit out loud... and he's not sure he'd get the same answer back.

But... he'd noticed he was able to just exist 'round Al, even with his dirty jokes, more often now. There was a slight ease of tension. Same as the one he had with Vaggie, really... you didn't say anything out loud, but you both knew there was an easiness there. A safety.

She hadn't even thrown that plate hard enough to decapitate earluer, and if that didn't say sisterly love, what could it stand for?

The sound of staticky uh, french-like words spluttering over the music in little hissing bursts catches Angel's attention. He snaps back into the moment.

Alastor looked furious and indignant about the whole cosmic flex of Lucifer's restocking. Of course the little king had interfered. It wasn't done kindly, it was another reminder that he could do anything he wanted and it was so Easy... with one thought he invalidated another way that Alastor was helpful to the hotel. His spy networks, the deals he had with smugglers... no longer necessary.

All so his majesty could try and show his daughter how useless even the most powerful sinners were in relation to the Morningstar family. Missing her point entirely... again.

Just because one Could doesn't mean one Should or even Must.

Angel, as one who had been around Hell for a while and could see what was yanking Al's chain about this mess, points out that it actually didn't curry favour with Charlie. Not like Short King intended after all.

Heck, he even points out it aint that bad if you reaaaaally thought about it... cause hey, saved money and time in the end, right?

Seeing a need to distract, he fluffed up his chest fur, draped himself over the countertop and cooed. Alastor's ears went right up in alert, and Angel would've bet Fat Nuggets that that floofy tail was doing the same in some ancient panic instinct.

Putting it on thick, to dispel the tension, Angel grins lazily at Al. Pointing out that, hey... maybe you could get them sexy smugglers to bring the starlet back some of those new Toys he'd heard about, cause word on the street was that there was this new kinda Stroker that-...

Al looked like he was about to have a stroke... but the ears settled. This was familiar nonsense.

Angel laughed, not unkindly, and stretched upright again. Messing with Al and Vags was sort of fun, like a hobby you dusted off when things got a bit Meh. It was also fun to get the Radio Demon on the ropes, given how much the guy liked to shitstir all on his own.

Alastor, for his part, then caught Angel completely off guard by asking if all 6 of his arms were broken - because why would he need something like that otherwise? The scrunched expression actually showed the overlord was trying to rationalise the request. Fuck, that was hilarious...

The whole bizarre nature of the conversation actually made Angel tear up in disbelieving mirth, holding his sides.

"How the fuck do you know what that is?" He'd wheezed, trying to imagine Al flicking casually through one of the Lust catalogues like he would a newspaper on Sunday. The mental image blurred and warped like Al on a camera screen, it was too hard to picture.

"We're from the same time period my good man, and Hell's advertising campaigns are as persistent as they are pervasive." Al points out the kitchen window at a number of visible billboards that displayed products one would not anticipate being so openly advertised anywhere else.

Nothing subtle about the new DragonDrillDo XXXL-treme from VoxTek! The billboard ran the breadth of three adjacent buildings and the product looked like it could probably could kill a Sin if used incorrectly.

"Oh. Well, a stroker is like... you know how sometimes you just have had a long day, and you don't wanna have to do everything yourself, right? Gotta get that dopamine flowing somehow, and store bought is fine in this house. No shade." He flutters his eyelashes and watches the deer sigh in silent resignation that he would weather whatever came out of Angel's mouth right now.

"Why don't we get one for the table, you know... to share if you like, and I'll help ya try it out..." the eyebrow waggle was excessive, but it sure was fun.

He hadn't anticipated the slice of tomato that slaps him dead on the forehead. Laughing harder as it slips down his face slowly, as if in on the bit.

"One could point out the merits of putting in a hard day's work, and using a little elbow grease as it were. The things you do by hand provide greater satisfaction, over the artificial...or so I have always come to understand." Al deadpans back, grinning at the suddenly shocked expression on Angel's face. "Come now, little spider, you don't truly believe that I'm blind to that side of life, hmm?"

"Smiles, watch what you say... with the visuals my brain is producing, asking me to come anywhere might just be a dangerous game." Angel quips back, putting certain mental images aside for later perusal. The guy was hot in the weird scary way of the overlords... so sue him.

He, predictably, gets another tomato slice to the face. Charlie was gonna scold them for wasting food in a hot minute. Ah well, Angel's just grateful it wasn't the capsicum, that coulda stung for days, had the overlord had them to hand.

Still, the fact he wasn't being mauled by poppets means that he musta wormed his way into Al's Good Graces. Same as husk and Niff and Charlie... and maybe Vags, he's not sure where those two fall now. Less attempted stabbing with that little angelic toothpick, at least... so maybe they're doing okay too.

"If you are quite done being ridiculous," Alastor makes quite the show of rolling his eyes and blasting an audience groaning at him. "Do be a, hah, a deer, and grab out the following..."

Angel may have four hands on heh, hand, most of the time but the list of spices was getting excessive at this point. They can't all go in the same dish, right? It'd be too much for one tongue to process and just come out feeling like you licked a powerpoint or something.

Angel's smart mouth moves as if to say something of the sort to the guy who could technically turn him inside out and not in the fun way, but won't 'cause they're not-buddies now... when something shifts. It's almost like the little glass thing wiggles out of the way of his grasping fingers and then hurls itself downward.

The cap unscrews itself as it falls, in a way that seemed too easy for something new, something allegedly just off the shelf of some earth store or whatever. His eight eyes flare wide with realisation at the What, but there's nothing he can do, no way to react fast enough to move as the contents begin to spray outward. A torrent that shouldn't be possible.

Angel feels someone grab one of his lower shoulders and yank him back, with a speed and ferocity that should have tossed him across the room, but even with that action he can sense it's far too late.

Scalding pain sears up his right upper arm and shoulder, fragmenting across face, neck and a splotch on her lower right arm. It's blinding. He's been hurt real fucking bad before, and each time felt different... this... this was like flashes of lighning behind the eyes.

Fuck, he hadn't felt anything like this since they stopped doing electronecro shoots. Fucking hated the few moths Val'd been into that... or maybe it eas Travis. Both needed to choke to death for that mess, if the world was fair, that is.

Angel can't comprehend anything but the twanging of nerves as his trajectory and the full force of his lanky telephone pole of a body is yanked straight into a writhing mass of darkness. The inky mass of shadows hissing frantically as granules continue to spill down, shielding as best they can despite ther own discomfort.

Dimly, Angel wonders if they feel pain... if Al can feel their pain, or what they touch. It's a weird thought...

Heh, best not share that with Val or he'd find a way to fuck that shadow, and Al'd burn down the whole of Pride. Oh, hang on, loopy thoughts, nope, can't do shock. that's bullshit. Get it together Angel.

The shadows brush over his limbs, dislodging what they could of the corrosive substance, trying to help where they could. Despite the obvious discomfort it caused everyone involved.

Angel is half braced on a nearby bench, trembling, because fuck that hurts, One of his arms is being gripped to near bruising strength, and the other is grasping Alastor's should right back.

Despite attempts to stifle it, Angel could feel his mouth part in a harsh, agonised cry as several of the utensils and bowls they were using crashed to the floor at the sudden displacement of bodies.

The container clanged to the floor innocently, rolling away and spewing out more than a dozen jars that size should have been able to produce. Perhaps an enchantment? Wouldn't be the first bottomless thing conjured; saved on shopping bills if things just refilled when empty or expired.

His shout must have alerted others because Vaggie was suddenly there, spear brandished wildly, as Husk stormed in behind her. The pair look ready to skewer Alastor if he was secretly attempting to murder and cook Angel.

To be fair... that was certainly one assumption. Angel could suggest a few other reasons for callig out that might get him actually, honest-to-satan, turned into shish kabobs by Al. He lets out a shaky laugh as his thoughts go a bit silly again.

He just holds off on slapping himself across the face, trying to stay calm. He'd had worse, much, much, MUCH worse... and this was what set off the hysterics? Fuck off with that!

Although, based on the way Husk's stern expression blanched just as sharply as Vaggie's, perhaps he wasn't being a big old baby about this. Maybe it really was Bad.

"Shit." Vaggie hisses, eye wide, and spear donking onto the floor. "What the fuck happened in here?"

Angel pushes himself upright as the shadows recede, breathing deliberately. That cute little in-out thing Charlie did in yoga the other day, something about breathing into boxes wasn't it? He wants to make a dumb box-based joke, but the energy is going into not-screaming as he moves his torso.

Angel can feel himself calming slightly, against the residual stinging pain in his cheek. Fuck, must've gotten some there. It's about a 5 out of 10, compared to the rest... until he tries to smile and reassure the others. Then it hits a full-on 7.5.

His eyes water, fuck, yeah he's not gone soft. That actually really goddamn hurts. It's exactly like that time Angel accidentally spilled acid on himself disposing of a rat uptop, the scars were still healing on his arm when he died. What a weird damn thing to recall.

Soemthing moved beside him, stiffer than usual but nonetheless commanding attention. "Husker, Vagatha... do NOT let Niffty in here. She'll harm herself attempting to clear the mess, and likely try to roll in it to chase the burning pain. You know her proclivities by now." The tone is that odd twist of jovial and authoratative, but the normal playful teasing lilt to it has a note of strain there.

Angel feel his world do a dark somersault as Alastor tugs him through the shadows and across the room to the entrance. Far away from the salt littering the surfaces about the cupboard, not to mention the floor. It seemed to still be trickling out of the container... what the actual fuck.

Vaggie ducked out the door and yelled for Charlie, citing urgency and that they needed medical help. Angel starts to think that perhaps that was, you know, overkill... but he's suddenly aware of how hard he's leaning on support when Husk pulls him off of Alastor and braces him with his own paws.

Those golden eyes are roving over the sinner, and Angel can't find the energy for a sexy little pout and some coquettish quip. Whiskers clearly ain't into what he sees. That expression could glower its way through steel doors if he wanted it to.

"Well, fuck... what kind of idiot puts actual, honest-to-goddamn-earth salt in the kitchen?" Husk mumbles herding Angel immediately towards the far counter, eyes assessing. "Gotta wash this off quick - you might have some clinging to your skin. Is the sink clear?"

The words ring in the air, echoing against the clashing sounds of their footsteps and the pounding of Angel's heart in his ears. It's about that point he catches up with the realisation that there's no music playing.

He glances back at the visibly seething Overlord, who was trying not to appear to be propping himself up against the nearby open door, and failing somewhat. Angel could see that the damn salt had clearly caught Al across the shoulder, upper back, neck and patches to one side of his face. One of the silly red ears was rather less fluffy, appearing quite agitated as it twitched.

Well, fuck. If Al caught a glancing blow whilst dragging Angel out of the spray, then how bad was the starlet? He felt barbecued.

Hah, technically he'd been pre-prepped and marinated in something. Maybe Al and his friend Rosie could take a nibble! Husk shook him, gently, but enough to click his brain back into the here and now. The hysteria quashed back down for the moment, he'd give his third pair of arms for that mess to stop.

"Hey, listen this is going to suck but it's necessary to get it off you. So just stay with me, alright?" Husk murmurs, wetting a teatowel and sarting to sluice the areas. He might have sworn rather viciously at the first touch of water... but by the time the second lot poured over the area, it started to feel soothing.

"Well this has been quite the little frustration. All our preparations have been tainted by something that would try to ea the stomach of those who ingested it." Alastor snarls as Vaggie approaches, slowly, as if she was trying to tempt an injured feral cat into accepting help.

His eyes snapped to her, and without the shadows, it was clear the extent of the damage. Angel hadn't realised Salt could eat through clothing until now, probably for the best he'd done such a damn good job on those stitches, the top edges of the wound are almost invisible under the regrown deer fur.

Angel can feel his own shirt just as ratty, and mourns the loss of it. He'd liked how it made his chest perk just right... and getting a shirt that could switch from four to six arms was a bitch and a half in this town. The enchantments alone cost him a lot in terms of repaying Val in weird, off the wall kink stuff the moth was into and Angel wasn't.

Briefly, Angel considered the fact he'd thought seeing Al dishevelled like this would make him look kinda hot, maybe a bit naughty. But it was kinda distressing, and freaky. Not unlike the night they found him collapsed, really. Overlords are meant to be untouchable gods compared to Sinners on the street, seeing them fucked up and hurt was... actually frightening in a weird way.

At least you could say that the mussy look made Al's perpetual grin all the more manic. You could feel that the wrong move might end in someone getting bitten. The radio dial eyes, though, suggested that perhaps Al had an idea who did this... and they were going to PAY.

It was also kind of a mess in his head now, not just his own injury. But Alastor actually interceding. He didn't have to, he'd been out of the 'splash zone' as it were... why the fuck had he risked harm by coming to get Angel?

Was this ike how sometimes Al would appear and take on Sinners targeting hotel staff? Or that time he literally took a bullet for Husk, and laughed about it, only to make the offender eat his own weapon until his teeth broke on the barrel and the fucker was a mess of snotty tears? Niffty'd turned the dislodged molars into a necklace and gifted it to Charlie... who had worn it for a full day and then put it 'somewhere safe'.

Hah, get wrecked you stubborn deer, you LIKE me! Angel suppresses his gleeful little giggle, knowing it'd hurt to let it out right now. The flicker of smug grin Husk shot him seemed to indicate he agreed. Or at least, that's what Angel was interpreting that as.

Still, guilt did churn in his guts cause, yeah, he could take a beating and all but it never felt right to have others get hurt for him. Anytime Cherri caught a blow in a fight to prevent him taking it, it weighed on him. This... this was just as messed up, but in a different way.

Alastor was shorter than Angel, not by much, but enough that it was inevitable that the salt showering on the spider was going to trickle down to those below even as they pulled him from the metaphorical line of fire.

Something down Angel's chest was burning, but at this point, he straight up wasn't ready to look down and acknowledge the full extent of this horror. Inside his chest, his heart was alternating between thundering at Husk's tender care and proximity... and aching for accidentally getting someone else hurt, for his sake.

He's just some washed up, rent-a-hole whore, why would anyone-... his fists clenched. No, no we're going to be kind to ourself. Even if it feels all woo-woo and new agey bullshit, but Charlie thinks there's worth in me. Husk looks at me like I hung the moon. Alastor put himself in harm's way to help me. They must think I'm worth something beyond my body, beyond sex.

And one day I'm gonna feel confident about that too. Not yet, but I'm gonna get there. Angel reassured himself.

"It's okay..." Husk murmurs, the mantra repeated soothingly over and over, until the tension in his arms released. "There you go... don't let the thoughts win. Hard to fight your own brain, but you can. I've won, and you will too."

Well, fuck, he can't not fantasise about riding Husk off into the sunset now can he? Not when Whiskers was being so kind, so understanding, so-... smug, actually. But following the flicking tail with his eyes helped to settle the weirder thoughts the spider was experiencing.

The calm immediately broken when the cavalry arrived.

Charlie blasts open the doors with the largest first aid kit known to sinner-kind. Three Nifftys could sleep in it with room to spare for the entire bug collection... where the fuck did the Princess get this thine?

Ah, Angel idly notes the Sloth symbol. Well, of course it was from Bellphagore, the Sin was prodigious for naptime and medical care.

"Nobody panic! I have literally everything we could ever need to manage a situation right here! How bad is it? Is anybody dead?" She rapid-fires across the room, eyes darting in all directions to assess the situation.

"It's fine, nothing that won't heal in a day or so, charlotte do calm down!" Alastor grins, doing his mildly condescending little hand wave, straightening back to his cheerful persona as if he wasn't half-charred.

Husk actually walks across the room and smacks his overlord over the back of the head with a wing. "Just cut the shit, Al, we both know that hurts like a bitch... and I'm like 85% sure being honest about that for once won't kill you. Probably. Ain't like anyone here will take advantage of you like this, they like you... lord knows someone has to."

That startles a laugh out of the deer. "Oh Husker, you are a delight..."

"More importantly," Husk interjects. Starting to tug the only mildly-resisting Alastor towards the sink as well. It's a miracle no one has been bitten yet. "How did this even happen? The only salt we got in the hotel is from Envy, normally... and you can't just accidentally get the earth stuff, right?"

Lucifer pops in in a swirling array of red-gold sparkles. "There you are sweetie, what's the hullaballoo that's got you yelling all over the hotel?"

Charlie, already pulling out more gauze and cream than anyone would need in a lifetime, gestures at Angel and Alastor. Husk returns to his task of gently wiping over Angel's angry-looking shoulder with a moistened towel; it takes effort for the spider not to flinch.

"Ooh yikes. Hmmm, looks like you got a little clumsy in the kitchen there, bambi." Lucifer grins, eyes sparkling with malicious delight. His expression doesn't waver as it takes in Angel. "And you managed to damage a guest in the process, how can you call yourself a bellhop? For shame."

The antlers creak ominously, extending upwards and pulling at the angry skin there as Alastor clearly chooses to ignore the limitations in the face of the small all-powerful asshole before him.

The process pauses, in shock, as Husk tests the bounds of Al's famously finite patience by clipping him again with a wing. Angel is going to have a heart attack if Whiskers doesn't cut that out right the fuck now. Al seems to surprised to be angry, at least.

What the porn start wasn't expecting, was to have the too-bright grin turned upon him as Alastor asked. "Angel... the device you mentioned earlier, would it come in such a width that one could cram the entirety of his Lowness into the orifice, since he wants to act like a pompous little dic-...?!"

"Whoakay, no need for that. I'm sure it was an accident..." Charlie interjects, hands up like someone trying to settle a furious horse that was ready and willing to cave someone's ribcage in.

Lucifer winked at Alastor and turned to face his daughter, "Of course it was, sweetie, I'd never hurt your guests deliberately!"

That omission caught even Charlie"s attention. "...dad? I just want to clarify... not accusing you or anything, but did you... know that you summoned earth salt when you restocked the pantry?"

"Of course not Char Char." Said the prince of lies, whose smile was violently gleeful under that insipid hat.

Charlie's expression closed off completely, pinched taut, as she saw Angel breathe his way through the gentle sluicing of water over too raw skin. Her mind was racing as rapidly as her pulse. Worst case scenarios whirling through her mind.

Would Valentino punish Angel for this? For being hurt and likely delaying filming? Probably. Fuck. She hated this.

Charlie takes a deep breath, and forces a smile onto her face. She can do this. "Dad. It starts with Sorry? Remember?"

"Of course, Char-Char! Ahem, Angle Rust, im sorry you were injured by accident." Lucifer chirped, looking slightly to the left of the sinner and not really caring for anything but Charlie's approval in this situation. He thinks he nailed the faux concern too, the pompous little cockrel.

Thankfully, his daughter is not the naive child he recalls. The King of Hell's eyes go wide eough to fall out of their sockets as his own beloved daughter hurls a half chopped cabbbage at his head. The leaves exploding about like confetti, leaving him bewildered and blinking sharply. "What?"

"That. Was NOT. An. Apology. Dad." Charlie growls, horns out and tail lashing. "We don't try to hurt others here, and I get you have an issue with Al for some reason... but this is ridiculous! You of all people know that earth salt can permanently harm sinners, so why would you do this?! I'm not as stupid as you think dad, it's clear you were hoping to get Alastor with this, because he's our main cook. And look what you did! Angel's hurt too, do you have any idea what his overlord might do to him because he's not 'camera ready'?"

Angel actually froze as icy dread clawed its way up his spine hand over hand. With everything happening, Angel really hadn't thought that far ahead, and now someone spoke the reality aloud he found himself visibky fighting back tears.

Val would make him pay for damaging company property...

Fuck, he'd be lucky if they let him leave the studio again.

"Worry not Angel," Comes an unexpectedly calm voice. "I will clear my schedule for the evening and deal with the moth. He's been on the to do list for a while..." Alastor reassured, admittedly uncertain why he was being so altruistic. He'd told himself to stop caring after the whole Adam fiasco. Damn it all.

"You... will? Why, I ain't got nothing to offer you..." Angel looked confused. That mask slipped over his face as he grinned salaciously, "unless ya changed your mind about that offer i made to suck ya-..."

It was his turn to get smacked with a wing.

"Behave."

"Anything for you, Whiskers..."

"Drop the act, its creepy." Husk groaned, wringing the teatowel out over something on Angel's side. The avian feline hissed in sympathy as Angel flinched back from the sensation, then cringed at the way the rest of his skin went taut. "Stay still if you can, I know it hurts, but you're doing great..."

"Indeed Angel, creepy is my shtick... do find your own." Al drawls, taking a subtle step away from the now-advancing Charlie, who had her demonic aspects out and more duckie shaped bandaids than anyone should have a right to have access to. "Please keep those away from me."

"Only if you let me flush the injury with at least some water to make sure we get it all off of you." Charlie negotiates, putting down the bandaids in a manner that suggested they could be snatched up again in a split second. And for a moment, Alastor feels pride at her clear if clumsy attempt at manipulation. She appears to have learned deceptive kindness, will demonic wonders never cease?

Lucifer is scowling. "Stop being such a drama queen. Here, I'll fix your little boo boos, even though its pointless because this is hell and you'll be hurt doing something violent or self destructive in the next four hours anyway, if you stop complaining about it. You got pranked, deal with it bambi."

Alastor bared his teeth sharply at the king's outstretched hand as the monarch advanced. Angel could see something trembling sharply under the coat from the corner of his eyes and guessed the deer instincts were not taking this threat all that well. "For someone who sees himself as above the so-called barbaric, cruel and hopeless sinners, sire, you certainly dont hesitate to utilise similar actions to harm out of petty jealousy."

The King pauses, scoffing arrogantly. "Jealousy? Of what, you? The freak manipulating my own daughter with this stupid sweet-cannibal overlord act? Fuck you. Because let's be real here... overlord or no, if i really wanted to I could just smite you and be done with it. Why can't you take a joke, Annette?"

Alastor learns towards the King. "Then do it, little majesty, smite away. Because I'm certain that a little spot of casual murder will repair the fracture between you and Charlotte fantastically and not just remind her how little you care for the sinners she's trying desperately to save."

He pauses, and if he physically could, Alastor would be scowling. "And for further clarification, you feathered fool - a prank is only worthwhile if the victims find it funny in the aftermath. Although given how isolated you've been, one can only imagine how little of the social graces or cues have remained. Is it any wonder everyone you ever loved has abandoned you?"

Lucifer was growing brighter with every word, horns out, tail lashing. Ah, there's the family resemblance.

There's a general group inhalation, and Angel sucks it through his teeth, his nerves flicked into flight or fight mode as the Devil himself seethes. You can feel his power like the pulses of sound at a concert, it moved through you and you know it could crush your bones with the right frequency.

"Sinner scum, you think you can show such disrespect to me and get away with it?" Lucifer's breathing hellfire on every word, very biblical and not at all overly-theatrical. How fascinating. "Let's see how smug you are when I strip your flesh from your bones!"

"Hah, you wouldn't even be the first to try it, you duck-obsessed dictator. Do attempt some originality, majesty, or did the creative flair disintegrate when you landed in Hell?" Alastor tosses back, appearing unconcerned about the fact that at least Vaggie and Charlotte are making definitive 'cut it out' gestures at him.

Shadows shoved Charlie, Vaggie, Husk and Angel out of the way as a blast of something bright hurtled through the kitchen towards Alastor; decimating retinas left and right.

Angel briefly wonders if Val would be open to having the scripts done in braille so he knows when to moan and when to say something dirty... because it didn't feel like he'd ever see again. Fuck, the sink seemed to be gone, as well as the walls behind it.

Charlie screamed in a horrified fury, leaping for her father, who was grinning as he panted in rage. "Not so smug now, are you, bambi?"

The grin dropped in pure shock as a rather disappointed-looking Alastor appeared from the dimming decimated area, appearing fundamentally unchanged... except for the collar flaring brightly, tight against his throat.

"Ah, blast. I'd hoped that would do the trick... do you want to try again, little majesty? I'm sure you have a number of insecurities I could prod at if you need motivation...?" Alastor asked, seizing at the lilac chain with obvious disgust behind that smile.

"You... what? How are you alive? Is that my-...?" Lucifer stammered, thrown off-guard. He could have vaporised Adam with that blast, why the fuck was the BELLHOP alive?

He receives a withering glare. "Do catch up. Yes, it is. No, I can't say where she is, though one might look upward for answers."

Charlie covers her mouth, breathing in for four and out for four. She can stay calm. Her dad tried to kill her not dad mentor overlord friend hotelier over some jibes, after he tried to pull a prank that could have severely injured him but backfired and got two members of her hotel instead. And something her missing mother did saved Al from the smiting, but he... was upset he didn't what? Die? Was this the time for crisis counselling? Was this a cry for help? What did the mental health first aid guide recommend? This was NOT in the curriculum!

Vaggie was there, immediately, her gentle hands holding her close and encouraging her to breathe. This was all so insane.

" If you are quite finished your tantrum, Little Majesty, would you heal Angel Dust already and show some contriteness for how your actions caused this harm?" Alastor snipes, redirecting attention to the other sinner. "He's quite injured, and I dislike knowing you have brought harm to a friendly party whilst attempting to torment myself. There will be a way to make you pay, little king, and I intend for you to worry about when and what form that will take."

Lucifer, possibly in shock, shuffled over to the starlet with a slightly vacant expression; reaching out mechanically to grab a wrist. He pulses gold light up the spider's arm, wrapping it around the injuries and soothing the harm without any visible effort.

By the time the light fades, even the hair has regrown to its normal pattern and consistency over the previously burned patches. Good as new. That was insane.

Husk has to physically catch Angel as his knees go weak from the sudden rush of endorphins as the pain stopped completely. They stumble a step before Angel can get his shit together in the wake of such an unexpected headrush.

Lucifer rounds on Alastor. "Now you're gonna tell me what the fuck that's about!" He gestures at the collar, " And why seemingly everyone else in Hell can land a blow on your frail crimson ass... but me trying to actively Smite you is waved off? Do you understand how physically impossible that actively is?"

Alastor lets his neck crack sickeningly to the side. "Hah, that's quite simple. She made it clear that I would not be allowed to let you stop me in any way, shape or form and wove it into the contract. Especially not die, unless it was in service to her daughter's hotel or ideals. Everything about you and your abilities is made to bend around that of your dear wife and her abilities; she bet the farm on being able to ensure against you causing harm to someone under her banner. You have no power here, little morningstar, and you most certainly aren't supposed to Be here. That has been made abundantly clear."

Lucifer found himself flinching back. He could hear the echoes of Lillith in those words, in her darker moments, when she'd lost composure against the only being in all of hell who could withstand her powerful fury.

Charlie looked stricken. "Al, what dad did wasn't right, and I'm not devaluing your experiences, but... everyone is welcome at the hotel. You can't say that to him."

Lucifer is looking at him pointedly, eyes narrowed and stomach roiling in horror as he deciphered this mess. "I don't... think that's what he meant, Char-Char. I think... your mother doesn't want me here, around you, and that's... upsetting her. Which used to be why palace staff got replaced so frequently... but I don't think you ever noticed, duckling."

"Why would she try to keep us apart?" Charlie frowned, her memories of time with her mother were so cheerful, interspersed with some odd moments of formailty and a bleakness. But who wasn't an angsty teen at some point?

Lucifer can't help the hysterical little laugh that escapes. "Charlie, she's done nothing but for your entire life. Why stop now?"

His jaw clicks shut as if horrified to have been so blunt.

"As disgusting as the words are in my mouth, I'm afraid I must agree with your father, Charlotte." Alastor grimaces somehow, the smile was there but he looked like he'd gotten a mouthful of poison with no way to spit it out. "You were to be kept separate, and away from... toxic idealism i believe is the wording used. Though I would argue you've already received a fatal dose lready, based on the hotel alone."

A laugh track plays, it feels perfunctory. Expected.

"Did she... make you come here?" Charlie asks bracing herself. It was pretty obvious, but given her mind was whirling form the last half hour, she feels she's doing pretty well actually!

"Yes, and no. Not at first, at least. Initially she just wanted someone to keep an eye on you, especially during your initial forays out into Pride. Your... enthusiasm often outweighed your common sense, before you found Vagatha, who then took on the role of guarding you." Alastor made a dramatic wink at the ex-orcist, who flushed slightly gold under the scrutiny.

"It was later, after that rousing disaster of a television program, when I approached you directly at the hotel that she decided to add stipulations about this project. Though her... request... to keep the royal house divided has been a source of contention as of late, especially with the recent meetings with Heaven and battle."

"So you're... sort of here on your own free will?" Charlie clung to hope that this answer would silence the crushing guilt in her stomach.

"You could say so. I wasn't forced to come to the hotel, that was out of interest and convenience, but once here it was identified that... she would prefer I stay. Which has been most frustrating." Alastor's right ear flattened, the left was damaged and twitched in place.

That prompted Angel to step in. "Okay, can we do story time when Al's not covered in salt-related injuries? I can tell you it sucks harder than Tina Titfucker in Tornad-hoes at Large 4: Return of the Gobbler, and she's a vacuum cleaner of a sinner when she gets going."

Vaggie looks revolted at the segue, but Husk is grinning.

Lucifer stiffens. "...I did say I'd fix it, didn't I, bambi? Can't have you swooning like a damsel in the middle of a big plot reveal... this isn't a hellanovella."

Alastor steps out of range of the hand, and is immediately bracketed by Angel and Husk. "I am willing to eat my way out of this, so anyone who wants to keep their hands on their bodies has until the count of 1." he snarls at them.

"Nah, I think you're going to chill out and trust us..." Angel teases, poking out his tongue and tightening his grip.

"If you think the whole... other night situation is going to save you frm my wrath, I assure you, the debt has been repaid already with this little mess. Do not test me." the Overlord snipes, going deathly still as the radio dials flashed. But intriguingly the sinners don't seem to be phased.

Angel seems intrigued. "Wait, you remember that? How'd you know I was there too?"

"Well, my good man, I know two tall pink-adjacent sinners and you, sir, were not in Rosie's signature attire." Alastor deadpans, as Husk clearly attained a ery specific visual and bit his lip to stifle the laughter. "I do appreciate the assistance, but had assumed it was implied that the reciprocal debt was up to me to figure out how to fulfil..."

"Er, no... sometimes you just help people ya care about, so they don't die. That's what people do. Would you have hesitated if it was like Rosie, or Charlie?" Angel asks, wondering who fucked up this guy's sense of trust... but then recalled where they lived and decided the answer was 'probably everyone'.

"That's... different."

"Did you three fuck? What's this coded thing happening here?" Vaggie interjects, looking to be on the verge of pulling her hair out.

Husk's hat falls off as he bursts into deep gales of laughter at the very idea. Angel pouts, "Aw Whiskers, it'd be real hot if we did... are you laughing at little old me...?"

Alastor appeared to be considering the implications of their statements and the current positioning of everyone. It was a plausible question.

He sighs, tensing slightly as Lucifer stepped closer. "No, rest assured I did not breach any of the fraternisation rules of the hotel. These two were foolish enough not to take the opportunity for a raise in status and power, when they discovered I was injured after the little fight with Heaven. Husker maintained he was the only one who was present, but I recall more than they suspect."

Angel gasped. "Fuck, you weren't awake for the stitches were you? I shoulda given you something."

"Rest assured, it wouldn't have been the worst thing that's happened to me, but no... that bit is not part of my recollections." Alastor assured, wondering why he felt the need to. He should have pressed on that guilt like a bruise, delighted in the agony and regret Angel exuded. But he was tired, and in pain and the... stars or something were incorrectly aligned for such schadenfreude. Something along those lines.

The spider and the cat seemed to relax a fraction.

"Good, cause I'd've felt like an asshole otherwise. That took ages to fix... you shoulda said something earlier, asshole." Angel mumbles, tightening his hold as Lucifer made contact. "No, keep all tentacles to yourself, Al... and teeth! Fuck, I need that arm, bad overlord! I'm not above smacking you with a rolled up newspaper if you snap at me again!"

"You wouldn't dare..." Alastor gasped, shocked.

"He would, and I'd find the sunday edition, so it had extra heft." Husk confirmed, the traitor.

Skin healed over, fur regrew, and the persistent sting seemed to fade. Lucifer paused, and then tugged the thinnest thread of somthing from Alastor's chest, causing the sinner writhe at the sensation. It was fine as a hair, tangling in on itself and disappearing into the aether at a casual flick of the devil's wrist.

"Got rid of the divine grace holding that little scratch open on you. You're welcome. Now, tell me more about this deal with my wife." Lucifer says, tugging his hand back as Alastor sagged, breathing heavily.

Husk turned and flared his wings, creating a bit of a privacy screen as he checked in with the Overlord. "You still alive?"

"Indeed. It's been... some time since there was a lack of pain in my everyday that it quite caught me off-guard." Alastor mumbled back, and wasn't that fucking sad to hear?

"You wanna talk to short king though? I can give him the old Sinder wink and take him somewhere to forget his wife for a bit, if you get me, and you can escape." Angel suggests, winking outrageously.

Alastor rolls his eyes. "I can't ask anyone to take on that level of vile task for my sake..."

There's an offended "HEY! I'm a CATCH you fucking period stain! Anyone would be delighted to sleep with m-... oh, sorry honey, I forgot you were there." from the other side of Husk's wing curtain.

Alastor straightened and used a flash of magic to repair his attire, and that of Angel, removing the muss of moments before. He nods to Husk, who drops his wings.

"What do you want to know?"

"The exact terms of the deal, as best you can provide it, because I'm sensing a silence order in the binding." Lucifer says, not quite a command, but bordering on it. Alastor glares at the mini monarch, but Charlotte looks on the verge of tears, so he relents.

"She has requested someone watch out for and protect Charlotte, and ensure her safety, no matter the cost. As I mentioned before there were caveats about that, and the hotel, but overall Charlotte is the centre of the matter. This includes managing any threats to the hotel, and not inciting any major overlord based drama, as she liked to term it. It's the main reason I haven't ripped Vox's head off and shoved it up the moth's backside like a matroyshka doll." Alastor's expression went sinister, and it definitely felt like there was backstory there that no one wanted to touch right now.

"Uh-huh... and what else?"

"Keep you away. Isolate Charlotte from your influence if possible. Keep her in a position where she can be seen as a harmless figurehead that Heaven will never feel the need to deal with or remove. thus the encouragement in this redemption farce." Alastor says, waving a hand and trying to ignore how Charlotte's fallen expression panged at the heart he definitely didn't have.

"But... it could work!" Charlie says, her passion and desperation driing her to tearfulness.

"Exactly. It COULD work, and she is afraid for you if it should."

"...what?" Charlie jerks back, blinking owlishly.

"There is... precedent, for a sinner being redeemed. I can't tell you about that, because she has bound it... but she didn't say that I couldn't mention it has happened before just the details."

"He's lying Charlie, don't get your hopes up." Lucifer warns, movng towards his daughter as her expression wars between hope and confusion. "She could have told him to say that..."

"I can also tell you, that redemption confuses Heaven, and she was told to deal with it last time it happened. Which is why she..." the next words cut off as the chain flared. The silencing charm in effect.

"Hmmm, you know, I don't recall if I was banned from explaining how the redemption allegedly happened... I understand they were out in an extermination with at least one person they didn't want to see die, and foolishly decided to stand between them and angel blades. I still don't understand how that resulted in redemption, because realistically thousands of sinners have tried to protect others from Exorcists over the years of slaughter... why this particular one?"

Charlie's eyes went wide. "That's... a really big clue, thanks Al! Ohhhh we need to look into this, it has to be about the intent! Or maybe the connection?"

"Please breathe, baby..." Vaggie murmurs, gently.

"Anything else?" Lucifer asked, frowning at Alastor. He didn't like this situation. It felt too convenient.

"She made it clear I was not to directly raise arms against or antagonise Heaven, particularly her first husband. To ensure this, she put a rather frustrating bind on my powers, I have some access... but not all." Alastor seemed to be aiming for nonchalant, but was clearly uncomfortable with having shared such a vulnerability, possibly wondering why he had done so.

Charlie looked like she wanted to grab his hands and say something heartfelt. Lucifer looked a tad too smug... and Vaggie's expression was torn between realisation and a base-born desire to throttle him. That, he could work with.

"Are you telling me, you old-timey idiota, that you faced the first man without any angelic steel and at half your power? What were you THINKING?!" she explodes, yanking at her hair.

"It was a conflict of orders, protect Charlotte and the Hotel but don't raise arms. It was the best caveat I could find... and honestly he was such a sloppy little thing, if it had't been for the guitar axe nonsense damaging my staff, it wouldn't have taken much more to kill him."

"But you-... ugh..." there was a string of words Husk looked like he agreed with but refused to translate. "Not the point! You should have said something! We could have had you put up the shield from somewhere less vulnerable to attack... had someone near you WITH the steel so you didn't have to pick it up. It's called trust, you idiot, try it sometime!"

Alastor's ears were flat back on his skull, eyes wide. He seemed taken aback she'd care at all.

"Welcome to being cared about, Al, you'll never know peace or privacy again... but the people make it worth it." Angel says, slinging an arm over the Overlord's shoulders. "I do have one question though... how can you be, y'know, in a soul deal, and still keep your souls?"

"Ah, that's simple, negotiation. Technically, there are still a number of souls under Husker, who is under myself. It's about how you word the contract."

"Oh... okay, that checks. So... how'd you meet her majesty?"

"Well, after a number of midnight rendevo-.. I'm kidding your majesty. We had an unexpected meeting under unusual circumstances, and a deal was the only way to prevent being trapped somewhere annoying. That's all I am willing to say on the matter."

Lucifer's red eyes seemed to See something before he nodded to himself. "I can see the truth of what you're hiding, sinner. Are you in danger from my wife? Does she... punish disobedience like she used to with the hellborne staff?"

"...perhaps, but it is harder to reach across realms. So for the most part it is additional limitations or draining power from afar. Annoyances, at best, but at least my skin stays on."

"Listen, I don't like you... but Charlie does, and I know what she's going to ask me. I could do it... but I need to know why you and Charlie have a chain between you. I can see it plain as day." Lucifer asks, voice glacial.

"It's not-..." Charlie starts.

"It's for a Favour, so do unclench. She wanted Charlotte on a soulchain to control her indirectly, but... well, that didn't quite fit the definition of Protection, from my perspective. Unfortunate, that. But a Favour allowed someone to share information about angelic steel to another party without repercussions, so it was necessary."

"...if I find out you're lying, and I do this, I will be actively able to smite you. You know that, right?" Lucifer says, again, not a threat... just... stating a fact.

"Well, given I was willing to allow it earlier for the off chance it might break the deal or kill me, I would say go right ahead, Sire." Alastor shrugged, "But if you want a deal..."

"Nope. Now, bend over," everyone ignored Angel's gale of laughter, "so I can reach the stupid thing and shut your eyes. I mean everyone, of course."

The King does... something. A light almost brighter than the attempted smiting, smote-ening, smything? Who knows, burns through the room and the whole place vibrates as a metallic snap is heard.

Shadows zoom up the walls and across the floors, the room fills with symbols and radios crackle to full volume momentarily. It settles quickly. "Apologies, that was a lot of power rushing back at once, it was allow it to manifest, or explode."

"....I suppose I owe you thanks, your majesty." Alastor said, saying without saying the implicit thanks. "Now, if you'll excuse us, I believe that there's a rather pesky insect requiring extermination. Come along Husker, Angel... let's take the Void!"

Husk groans, but it's swallowed up by the sudden wave of shadows.

"Dad, can you clean up the salt? I don't want anyone else to get hurt." Charlie asked, "And... and then ould we go and talk somewhere? About mum? And the things she did? I think we need to..."

"Anything for you Charlie. You know that." Lucifer reassured, snapping away the mess.

As they left the kitchen, there was a tiny cry of despair from niffty, who had escaped her confinement too late to play in the Pain Snow.

-----------

Flaming debris rained down upon the few employees Angel had pointed out should probably go down with the ship, as the Studio burned. Husker helped tie the fuckers up.

Bits of Valentino rained down upon them all, as Alastor finished tearing the man to ribbons. Jazz and maniacal laughter filled the air.

A drone paused overhead and Alastor smiled into the camera. "Oh don't get jealous, picture box, you're next on the list!" he coos, and holds upValentino's head. "See you soon!"

The drone jerks away at speed.

Angel fumbles to catch the skull thrown his way, screams and drops it. "No, no thank you I don't need it on my wall, thanks..."

"Ah, a pity."

"Thanks for this... Boss." Angel grins, and feels mild relief to maifest a chain that wasn't pink for once. It disintegrates. "What?"

"You have your freedom, I can't and won't uphold the deal you had with the Moth, it's vile... but if you want a deal wherein I place you in charge of the other souls from the moth and you do what you will with their skills, consent and some funding... that's up to you."

"Whiskers?"

"I'd say read the fine print... but yeah, that sounds like a good deal to me. Any chance you'd let me go, boss?"

"You know, you've caught me in a good mood, why not?"

Husk's chain snaps too.

"Now, who wants to go to my room for a stiff-..." Angel grins, Alastor glares. "drink of some top notch whickey, and we shall renegotiate your potential contracts, hmm? We can come and kill the picture box and the doll another day. Ah, I'm sure dear Charlotte will be delighted to hear of your freedom, Angel! And yours, Husker!"

"Yeah, yeah, love ya too you emtionally repressed murder machine!" Angel grins, pulling the pair of Overlords towards him in an expected hug. Husk makes a confused mrrrp? and Alastor, he made a small Bleat.

Angel's eyes go ROUND in delight, looking at the pair. "Holy fuck, if I knew you guys came with sound effects like that I would've been squishing you into hugs far earlier, that's cute as hell. Like nuggsy-level adorrable..."

"husker, your man seems over-tired and clearly delusional. Do get him under control while I prepare a portal?"

Husk snorts. "You're on your own, Al, anyway I know you're fawn'd of us."

For that, he gets no warning as the floor turns to shadow void.

Husk and Angel would maintain it was worth it though.

Alastor pinches his nose, exhausted. "Ah, but the show must go on, hmmm? Let's see what happens once the curtain rises after such a lengthy... intermission."

His smile fade out last, as the overlord travels to the hotel with his hapless passengers. There were deals to make and Heaven to overthrow... no time to waste!

---------------

End

I had a vague idea and it spiralled, so tired.

[librathefangirl]

i gotta get up in like 6 hrs but i can't sleep so here have the oh shit nnt thought of the night:

the only demon in THE demon hating club

this is a sentence my brain just came up with to describe Stigma Meliodas, and isn't that fucked up?? Like that was a very fucked up thing Meliodas put himself through. I feel like we as a fandom don't talk enough about how fucked up that was (shadowed by all the other fucked up things meli went through)

Because... not only did Meliodas' decision to join Stigma cause every demon to hate him, it also meant that he decided to spend his days around people who hated him or at the very least his race (that cannot have been good for his mental health which let's be honest probably was really shitty to begin with because of the dk and his childhood)

The goddess in the horn really wasn't that far off when she said he had no allies. Like obviously she wasn't right, but she wasn't entirely wrong either

Cause let's think about that in regard to Stigma Meliodas. We don't fully know how most of the members of Stigma felt about Meliodas, but considering they talked about slaughtering "every last one of the damned demon race" when Meli was literally RIGHT THERE (and none of them were like hey lucy maybe we shouldn't commit genocide) we can assume most of them wouldn't care if Meliodas died and probably only tolerated him being there because they had no choice (and if he was on their side then he wasn't on the enemy's side)

The way he responds to King (as Gloxinia) questioning his loyalty just seems so resigned, like he has been over this time and time; he knows Stigma don't trust him and he knows there's nothing he can say to change that, only his actions (him not betraying them) can prove he is actually on their side and not some deep undercover spy for the demons

Anyways I'm getting sidetracked- ALLIES! The only people in Stigma we know considered Meliodas an ally and friend are: Elizabeth (of course), Drole and Gloxinia, and then Rou

First let it sink in how fucking short that list is, and then let's think about each of those allies and what happens to them...

Elizabeth. Well. She dies. Horribly. And like I'm not even talking about the whole curse thing, I'm talking about how goddess Elizabeth died and Meliodas had to continue living. HE WOKE UP NEXT TO HER DEAD BODY. That was another very very very fucked up thing that happened (that we also don't talk about enough me thinks - cause like... he died. but then he didn't. but then she was still dead right next to him. and he didn't even know about the curse. he thought she was dead dead and he was alive. she was gone forever. and he was still living and now alone. very fucked up)

And then we have Rou. Rou who befriended Meliodas. Rou who knew Meliodas was a demon and didn't care and still called him a friend. Rou who only joined Stigma to get revenge on Stigma. Like yeah Rou didn’t hate every demon but he still brought that kind of hate and violence (regardless of his reasons). And was then also killed (by one of Mel's allies no less)

Which brings us to Drole and Gloxinia. Who had every reason to hate Meliodas (being the kings of their respective races) but still saw Meliodas as an ally and friend. Drole and Gloxinia who Meliodas then lost. Not to death but to the very side Meliodas himself had left in order to join Stigma. Who then also got sealed away for 3,000 years (leaving Meliodas not only without Elizabeth but also without his friends). And thennnn 3,000 years later, the same allies/friends are now Meliodas' enemies. (Hell Gloxinia is one of the Commandments who actively attack Meliodas in the fight leading up to Meli's literal death

And

Yeah

It's fucked up

It's also now only 5 hrs until i gotta get up so...

TLDR; The First Holy War era deserved more attention in canon and Stigma Meliodas went through some really fucked up shit

[spectrechosts]

Better Off Alone

The first chapter of my first longform story, posted in nine parts totalling 24,000 words. It's an 18+ story of an ill-tempered princess falling for her transfem knight while trying to rewrite her fate. If you follow this account you're going to be seeing a LOT of these two.

Full Series

Lunaeris was a princess, the youngest of six princesses of the Elven Kingdom, and she was very displeased with her life.

She lived in comfort, yes, all her needs were attended to- but she had no freedom. Her duty by birth was to be a political bargaining chip, and not even a particularly appealing one. She existed to be shopped around to the least impressive princes of other kingdoms, every royal family on the continent playing the shittiest game of matchmaker ever seen in the name of making some diplomatic gain off of their weakest heirs and heiresses.

It was, to put it lightly, pathetic. It made her feel like an object. So, when she got word that her father once again had someone for her to meet, she did what she did best.

She meandered.

She was years deep in an elaborate game of seeing exactly how far she could sabotage her own love life without being called on it, and she was very skilled. Spend far too long getting ready when she's been summoned? Why, she just had to be sure she looked absolutely perfect for her prince. Clothes painstakingly picked out of and put back into her closet, long white hair brushed over and over, to make the best possible impression. If they got off on the wrong foot because he was annoyed at waiting, well it just wasn't meant to be.

She sat in front of her mirror and began applying black makeup to her eyes. While she did style herself this way because she liked how it looked, she also liked that it made some of her particularly stuck-up suitors describe her as "dreary", "kind of off-putting", and- and this one was her favorite- "probably some kind of vile witch". Her father had only attempted to convince her not to do this once, and was easily persuaded otherwise when she pointed out that having a princess using their wares encouraged trade with the dark elves. Frankly, it was the most she had improved relations with another kingdom in her life, and she didn't even have to get married to do it.

Once she was dressed and ready, she strode out in search of more delays. At this time of day, she could swing by the gardens and waste at least fifteen more minutes.

Or at least she could have, had the king not intercepted her in the hallway.

"Ah, there you are! Come, we must hurry." He said, and Lunaeris begrudgingly followed.

"Is my suitor so impatient you had to collect me yourself?" She asked, and he shook his head.

"No suitors today I'm afraid. The sages have brought a prophecy."

"Oh." Lunaeris said, already uninterested. Her father loved prophecies, but she had always found them a bit finicky. Raised a lot of questions about free will- were the gods controlling everything they all did? Were they only *sometimes* doing so, and had now chosen to blight her specifically by removing any remaining shred of agency she had? She wasn't a fan.

"Oh yes, and it's a doozy. The demon king plans to kill you."

"….Oh." She wouldn't describe that as 'a doozy', exactly.

"Yes, but don't fret! the prophecy says he fails. A hero will arrive in your hour of need and slay him with a blade of purest sunlight! And then you and the hero are to be wed! All will work out fine in the end."

"Hm."

She also wouldn't describe that as 'working out fine'.

"But I know you have misgivings about prophecies, and I wouldn't want my daughter living in fear. And that's why I sent for a bodyguard to accompany you and keep you safe until the threat has passed."

"What?"

"You know the half-giants? From the mountains? One of their best paladins is already here to make sure no harm befalls you."

"Father, I hardly need-" Lunaeris tried to protest. This prophecy was already dreadful, she did not need a babysitter on top of it.

"I know, I know, you don't want a bodyguard, but this is for the best. Give it a week, you'll hardly even notice anything's changed."

"I'll hardly notice the half-giant stalking me in full plate?"

"It's amazing what you can grow accustomed to, given time." Her father paused as they reached the throne room. "Now, you've delayed long enough. I understand there is some degree of ceremony involved, a swearing of an oath, and then you may waste time as you see fit. With your new guard."

"Very well. Since they're already here."

They entered, and the king sat on his throne and gestured for Lunaeris to stand in the center of the room, next to the largest woman she had ever seen. Her bodyguard-to-be had to be almost eight feet tall, and as broad as an ox. She looked immovable in her armor, a monument of steel adorned with a cape of white satin over her shield arm.

"I hope we haven't kept you waiting too long. My daughter has a habit of getting lost in these twisting halls."

"Not at all, your majesty." The knight said, her voice rumbling out from her great helm.

"Excellent. Please, begin whenever you're ready."

The knight knelt before her on one knee (Gods, she still came up to chest height, how big were full giants?) and removed her helmet. Lunaeris looked upon her face, and found it strikingly handsome.

"If I may have your hand, princess?" She said, holding out a gauntleted palm which Lunaeris gently took.

Finding her new knight handsome was, obviously, unacceptable. She had long since accepted that love was not for her, and did not need to be thinking about kissing anyone's beautiful square jawline or tousling their short-hewn hair.

The paladin had already gotten started on some lengthy rehearsed speech while the Princess was otherwise distracted. Paladins loved their ceremonies. Despite this, she continued to not pay attention, instead focusing on the fact that what she had thought was more cape covering the paladin's back was actually a pair of white-feathered wings. She had heard some paladins had those, but couldn't imagine they could possibly lift her into the air. They did however, look very soft.

Perhaps she would let her touch them if she asked.

"-Holy Knight of the Seventh Monastery, do swear my undying loyalty to you-"

Shit, had she missed her name? It wasn't like her to get carried away in her imagination like this.

"-your burdens shall be my burdens, your sorrows my sorrows-"

It didn't help that whatever this oath was, it sounded not entirely unlike marriage vows. Not that she had heard many other kinds of vows to compare them to. It made her ears redden to think about it.

"-for as long as I draw breath, no harm shall come to you."

She waited for the knight to continue, but she had apparently tuned in towards the end of the speech. The king clapped his hands together and stood.

"Marvelous!" He said. "Don't you feel safer already?"

"Yes, much." Lunaeris lied, and hurried back to her room, paladin in tow. She hesitated at her door.

"These are my private chambers-"

"Of course, Princess. I shall remain out here, should you need me." The knight said, her voice once again muffled by the helmet she had at some point put back on.

At least that distraction was gone.

She shut her door and flung herself onto her bed.

"Fuck. Shit. Gods damn me."

Her heart was a fortress, constructed over years to be completely inaccessible to any who dared approach.

She did not get crushes. Especially not on giant bodyguards she didn't even want around. Especially especially not when she was now prophecised to-

She cracked her door open.

"Paladin."

"Princess?"

"Your sword, is it magical?"

"No, my lady."

"Do you cast magic on it? Some kind of sunlight enchantment?"

"No, my lady. I hold no magic beyond the power of my oaths."

"Very well. Carry on."

She nodded curtly and closed the door.

-prophecised to marry someone else entirely. It was unthinkable. It would ruin her. She would simply insist to her father that she didn't need a guard, or at least not this specific one.

She cracked her door open again.

"…Could you remind me what your name was, my knight?"

"Kallixenia, Princess."

"May I call you Kallie?"

"If that pleases you, my lady."

She shut the door again.

This meant nothing, of course. She could call Kallie 'her knight' and give her nicknames, she was still getting rid of her.

Tomorrow.

If she got around to it.

Fuck.

[thenasoneshots]

Lucifer/Alastor Oneshot - A Tale of Two Dads

Requested?: No

Prompt: None

Type of oneshot: Fluff/Angst

Reader's Relations: Alastor’s ex-girlfriend

Warnings: Spoilers for eps 7-8 of season 1! This was written the say those two came out

Other notes: Don’t ask how I thought of this…Somehow, my brain fixated on these two, and well oneshots is what happens when my brain gets fixated on characters.

-------------------------------

“You absolute bastard, Alastor!” I shouted once he’d shown up at Charlie’s hotel, seven years after leaving, “You leave for seven years and all you have to say is ‘hi’?! Someone hold me back before I fuck his face up!”

“Hello, My Dear, it’s good to see you too.”

“Fuck you,” I retorted, making eye contact with him, in an easy feat due to the fact I was the same height as him. He just smirked at me, using his microphone to lift my chin, an unnecessary thing due to the fact I was already looking at him, “Now now, that’s not the right way to talk to me, is it, My Dear?” I didn’t respond, instead I just growled and tried to punch him continuously, him dodging every blow I attempted to make.

“You should know that’s not going to work, (Y/n).”

“Fuck. Off. Before. I. Kill. You. Myself. Bastard. I’ve had to deal with a child that you-”

“Mama? What’s going on?”

My head immediately shot around to see Alianna standing at the bottom of the stairs, the seven-year-old rubbing her eyes as if she’d just been woken up. I gave Alastor another glare before rushing over, “It’s okay, Sweetie. Nothing you need to worry about,” I spoke, ruffling her red hair.

“You always say that!”

“I say that because most of the time, you don’t need to worry ab-”

Alianna cut me off, asking the question I had wished she would never have to ask, “Is he my Papa?”

If I’d been drinking something, I would definitely have spat it out in shock, “Now now, Ali, that’s something you don’t need to worry about you. You can learn more about your father when you are older.”

She pouted for a few seconds before, “Okay, I’m older!”

I chuckled, “I meant in a few years, now back to bed with you.”

Alianna sighed and nodded, running off back upstairs towards our room in the hotel. I let out a sigh of relief and stood up, turning around, only to have Alastor directly in my face, “For fuck sake, stop doing that, you bastard,” I shouted, punching him in the arm.

“Why should I stop when I get-”

“Were you listening to our conversation?”

“It was kind of hard not to, (Y/n)... I think you owe some people an explanation, and I’d be happy to loosen up your strings a bit if you know what I mean,” I heard Angel’s voice saying before I saw one of his arms dangling in front of my face and, what I guessed was another, on my head.

I rolled my eyes, “How many times, Angel? I’m not interested in you. Stop trying,” I growled, shoving him off me, “But, I guess you’re right about the explanation. This Radio Demon Bastard here,” I paused and pointed over in Alastor’s direction, “Is Alianna’s father. She doesn’t know, so please keep it quiet. I’m begging you.”

“You can always beg more, (Y/n). If you catch me drift…”

“Angel, shut up for once. Not the time for your sexual fantasies.”

------------------------------

“Alianna. No. Get back here right now!” I shouted, running up and pulling her off Lucifer gently, “I am so sorry, Sir. She got out of my sight. I apologise again.”

“It’s alright. She’s cute anyway. Much like her mother.”

I felt my face turn red as I looked away, but before I could say anything, Alastor was in front of me, glaring down at the Short King of Hell, “She’s mine. Get away.”

“Oh really?” Lucifer questioned, before walking around the Radio Demon and up to me, taking my hand in his, “Because there’s nothing on her hand to show she belongs to anyone,” he finished, bringing my hand up with his and kissing it, “But if she really is ‘yours’, she has had ample opportunity to stop my advances, and isn’t so…”

“I do not belong to anyone. You,” I turned and glared at Alastor, “May be Alianna’s father, but it doesn’t mean that I am ‘yours’. As a matter of fact, you lost all rights to even seeing her when you left, so you can just go away and leave me alone!” I shouted.

------------------------

A few days later, I found a(n) (F/c) rubber duck sitting on my bed, along with a note. “I wasn’t messing around when I said you were cute, I meant it. Call me? L.” there was a phone number at the bottom and I giggled. I knew it was probably wrong as he was Charlie’s dad, who was my best friend… But he’d made an impression on me. So I added the number to my phone under the nickname ‘Short King’, and sent a message, “I got your note. Thanks for the duck. How’d you know (F/c) is my favourite colour?”

--------------------------

I groaned in pain as I lay on the ruins of the hotel, after having come face to face with one of the angels, blood seeping from my side. It was just as I was losing consciousness, that I saw a flash of white in front of me, fighting off the angel.

LUCIFER’S POV

Once the angels had retreated, I turned back to (Y/n) to see her unconscious, with blood surrounding her. Immediately, I retracted my wings and knelt beside her, realising she’s been severely wounded, “(Y/n)? Please wake up. You have to. (Y/n), please. I- love you.”

“Dad?”

I looked up to see Charlie standing there, a saddened smile on her face, “You can’t bring her back.”

“Is there nothing?! No one can bring her back?” I asked, despair wreaking through my voice, as I felt tears cascading down my cheeks.

“I’ve got one idea… but it’s a long shot, so don’t get your hopes up,” Charlie replied, running off. She came back a few minutes later, dragging a girl behind her, who seemed to be complaining, “Charlie! I told you, I can heal, but I can’t combat the second death!”

“Just try. For me? Please?”

“I’m telling you, this isn’t going to work if she’s dead, Charlie!”

“Try though? Please, Brianna?”

“Fine, I’ll try, but no one get their hopes up,” the brunette replied as Charlie pulled her over. I noticed Brianna take a deep breath before kneeling on (Y/n)’s other side, cracking her knuckles, “I’ll say it again if she’s truly dead, then this isn’t going to work, but I’m going to need help,” she paused and turned her attention towards me, “May I ask for your help, Sir? This will only work if I have the help of someone she loves.”

“M-me? I-Isn’t there someone else that she loves? Like her daughter?”

The brown-haired demon just chuckled in response, “I mean it’s got to be romantic love, not platonic love.”

“Oh... Wait a minute, do you still want me to help? As much as I hate to say this, shouldn’t you be getting that Radio Demon to help? In the sense that he’s the father of her daughter, therefore she must love him.”

“As a matter of fact. I know she hates me. She lit-”

“Alastor’s right, Dad. You may not have realised, but that duck you gave her has pride of place in her room. Every day she makes a point of dusting it, and no one’s allowed near it. I’m surprised it’s not in a locked box that only she has access to. She wouldn’t have kept it if you didn’t mean anything to her. Plus you deserve to be happy as well,” Charlie spoke, placing a hand on my shoulder and kneeling beside me, “Trust me. You’re the one we need to bring (Y/n) back.”

“Well? Are you going to do this or not? We don’t have much time left.”

With a final boost of confidence from Charlie, I nodded, turning to Brianna, “Okay.”

She smiled, “Okay. In that case, I need you to place both your hands above where her heart is and keep your eyes closed. Can you do that?” I nodded, doing as she asked me, remembering to close my eyes.

YOUR POV

I woke up with a start, and I lifted my head in shock, but before I could say anything, I’d been wrapped in a hug, “(Y/n)!”

“O-oh.. hello, Mr Lucifer. I-It’s good to see you too,” I replied as he continued to squeeze the living Hell out of me, “C-can you let me go though? Personal space.”

“Sorry! I’m just glad you’re okay,” he started, letting me go as his face turned the same colour as his waistcoat, but before I could mention it, Charlie had spoken up, “See, Dad? Told you it was you that she loved.”

“CHARLIE!” I all but screamed, “HOW IN THE ACTUAL HELL DID YOU KNOW THAT?! You better start running. I don’t care if you’re the Princess of Hell, telling someone that your friend has a crush on them is not funny!” I continued, standing up and starting to chase after her, but before I could get too far I felt a gloved hand wrap around my wrist and pull me backwards, spinning me around, before I felt pressure on my lips. It took me a second to process, but once I did I wrapped my arms around the King of Hell’s neck and kissed him back.

“You have nothing to be ashamed of, (Y/n).”

I grinned widely, “Still embarrassing that it took your daughter to get us together though.”

“I have something for you, (Y/n)...”

“Let me guess… is it another rubber duck?” I asked, my voice laden with sarcasm. Lucifer’s face turned red as he looked at me a shocked expression on his face before out of thin air, a small box appeared. Lucifer took it in his hands before handing it to me, “I-I’ve been working on them since I left you the first one… I hope you like them.” I smiled and took the lid off, my eyes widening with glee at the sight of the small family of ducks. Two adults, one a light yellow, the other a (H/c) colour with lashes painted around the eyes, with two baby ducks, one the same colour yellow as the adult, also with eyelashes, and the other a red colour. I giggled at the meaning behind the colours, the adult ducks supposed to represent me and Lucifer, and the two baby ones representing Charlie and Alianna, and hugged the blonde male in front of me, “I love them, thank you. I know exactly where these are going,” I spoke, pecking Lucifer on the cheek after leaning down to do so, whispering in his ear, “Short King.”

“I am not that short!”

“Hmmm. Compared to me, you are,” I smirked, “Now, who wants to rebuild this hotel?”

—------------------------------END OF ONESHOT

The ending was not how I imagined it, but at least it didn’t go over 2000 words… This was originally supposed to have more Alastor x Reader in too, but it didn’t fit with the plot I was going with.

[lee-hakhyun]

「“Uriel. What were you thinking when you brought those 'lambs'?”」

Archangel Uriel still remembers that day.

「“Could it be that girl didn't know what the 'lambs' that the Scribe told her to bring meant?”」

The whispering voices of the Seraphim as she arrived with the lambs in tow. Uriel frowned at those guys and thought. Why try to understand what 'lambs' those 'lambs' meant? It's better to get another demon's head than waste time agonizing over something like that.

「“At any rate, I brought ten?”」

Her calling was to hunt demons and kill Demon Kings. Archangel Uriel was born solely for this. Countless beings of evil fell under her famed swordplay. Demon Kings. Demon Lords. Devils. Any star containing the character of 'evil' did not escape her blade. After hundreds or thousands of years passed, the light of the stars belonging to 'Absolute Evil' began to go out. During that unimaginable period of depravity, the universe she belonged to gradually darkened.

「“Why are you killing demons?”」

When was that question asked? Was it when she heard of rumors of a new Demon King at the border?

「“I've been ordered to.”」 「“Would you kill anyone if ordered to?”」 「“Mm.”」

As he said, Uriel had also killed the Demon King's lover. Because that was also an order she had received.

「“Archangel. You are like a demon.”」

Holding his lover who no longer breathed, the Demon King spoke a quiet curse.

「"Archangel who loves nothing. Someday you too will love something. When that time comes, the fire you have started will judge you.”」 「“Whatever.”」

Uriel jeered as she cut the Demon King's throat.

'demon-like judge of fire'.

her modifier, of which the archangels revered and absolute evil feared. she killed demon kings like her modifier. over and over and over, in so many ways. and after so long, she got a new order. "uriel. halt the 'demon hunt'."

too many demon kings had died. a ceasefire was signed, yet uriel thought it a joke. a year passed. a decade. after half a century, uriel finally realized.

this can't be right.

she was born to destroy evil. she didn't go so far just to end up with this 'peace'.

after going on a rampage and ending up restrained by jophiel, she's forced to swear on her name as an archangel to not touch another demon king without the scribe's permission. ■ck, what was she supposed to do now?

she's told to take care of the sheep.

seriously? an archangel who used to defeat demon kings, now forced to be a shepherd? as a sheep walks up to her, she reflexively hits it and as the sheep slumps over, a low rank angel runs up to her in shock. she no longer remembers the angel's name, but only their title— teacher yang.

(yang/양 = sheep)

there were so, so many sheep. the 10 lambs uriel had brought had multiplied, and at this point the lambs of eden are quite popular. those sheep that appear in dreams? they're from eden :) teacher yang says that this is all thanks to uriel. thanks to the peace she brought.

counting the innumerable sheep, uriel finally admitted that she had really been released from her mission 'temporarily'. what should an archangel who had dedicated her life to hunting demons do now? she can watch sheep for a while, but this can't go on forever—

it's then that she sees teacher yang watching someone on a portable device. later, she learns that teacher yang was a 'star stream broadcasting' addict. looking at the screen, a video was playing.

「“Calm down, Yoo Sangah-ssi.”」

and right after, she learned for the first time she learned of the 'lambs' metatron wanted were.

「“Think about it. We are in a game right now.”」

---

a lot had happened since then. the great war of saints and demons broke out, and <eden> fell. she watched metatron, the archangels, and the seraphim who had laughed at her die.

「“What about the sheep?”」

teacher yang's last words.

「“I was supposed to shear them today...”」

the low ranking angel died, leaving behind no story. uriel never learned their name.

after the scenarios ended, she spent a lot time in a small garden. she was left alone in <eden>, where not a single sheep was left. sometimes she descended to interact with the incarnations or gabriel, she danced and sang when she was in the mood, but most of the time she stayed in the garden. she slept in the garden, and sometimes she ate. and she watched a story.

「“Uriel, you know. This is just a story.”」

she watched as one star died once more. in this ruined world, this was the only story she managed to keep.

the main character of that story was gone. no one knew where he went. though she knew that— or maybe because she knew that, she continued to watch that story without doing anything.

and sometimes she thought about sheep.

she dreamed of a man who became a sheep, living somewhere unknown to her. in that world, that man will meet new companions, and gain a new history. a new family would have been formed, without her knowing.

someone starts speaking to her.

she recognizes the voice. but that can't be. the owner of that voice had found his ■■ and died. no, did he really die? she didn't know. she knew nothing of the last ■■ he had reached. and she didn't particularly care.

the voice continues to speak. commenting on how she was still interested in this story. asking if she was curious about the next chapter.

the next chapter?

there's a place she can see the next chapter. she couldn't intervene, only watch. and she'd new a new modifier.

but if she could see that star again.

and that was how uriel came to this 'scenario'.

with a temporary modifier of 'The One Who Brought Ten Lambs', under the role of 'teacher yang' in this academy scenario.

uriel was grateful for her history she was grateful she had brought ten lambs to eden at that time. she was grateful she met teacher yang. she was grateful that she was the 'demon-like judge of fire', that she was an archangel of eden.

"Thank you, Uriel."

as lee hakhyun spoke her name, the door to the teacher's office started to close. uriel stumbled toward the closing door.

"Dok..."

spraks fly. even if that name was allowed to be spoken in this worldview, the worldview had caught on. the name she had called was not just of this world's 'actor'.

it was the name of her favourite story. uriel shouted his name.

the door did not open.