#kill skills
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ghostbird17 · 1 month ago
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dick grayson is absolutely the kind of person to have a fairly bad allergy to some food, and completely ignore it because that is his favorite food what do you mean he can't eat it?
i like the idea of him being allergic to mangos. not necessarily bad enough to warrant a hospital visit every time, but enough he suffers for his choices.
i also like the idea that the batfam have to keep eyes on this man at all times when a mango is in his vicinity.
Dick, wandering the Manor with faux casualty, mango in hand as he tries to find somewhere to eat it out of sight:
Jason, sitting in the library: "Hey, Dickie, what've you got there?"
Dick, immediately looking like a guilty dog who got caught in the trash: "...nooothing-"
Jason, snapping his book shut and sitting up: "Is that a fucking mango."
Dick, bolting: "NO?"
Jason, chasing immediately: "YOU CAN'T FUCKING EAT THOSE, GIVE IT HERE! DICK!"
Tim, sitting at the Batcomputer, working on a case:
Barbara, popping on screen: "Mango alert."
Tim, dropping everything to bolt upstairs: "RICHARD JOHN GRAYSON!"
A muffled screech is heard in the distance, followed by curses and demands of "spit that shit out NOW-"
The entire Batfam at dinner:
Dick, sneaking the mango flavored icecream over:
Damian, smacking his hand: "Richard for the love of-"
Dick, snatching the icecream and bolting: "You can't keep me from my mangos! I will never relent! MANGOS FOREVER!"
The entire family chases him down. Alfred is preparing treatment, and Bruce is sitting alone at the dining table, a few more grey hairs, and looking like he regrets everything. Muffled screams, curses, and then a loud lecture from at least three different people can be heard a few rooms over.
listen, the day he discovered his allergy was the same day he discovered his new favorite fruit, and he absolutely considers it a crime of the highest caliber to keep such a snack away from him.
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ironinkpen · 8 months ago
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there's something so poetic about kipperlilly copperkettle—who hated one of her classmates for daring to be better than her and having a dead dad, who refused to improve herself and instead chose to be bitter and entitled, who was so obsessed with being Special and Important like she felt she deserved that she willingly worked with a rage god, betrayed her party, and killed her friend—getting killed by fucking. Hold Person. her fancy optimal build IMMEDIATELY folding in the face of riz's cleverness and experience and applied knowledge. she spends years fixated solely on racking up EXP and getting the Best Abilities, and then when she dies, she's killed not in glorious combat but by a clever, practical application of a 2nd level spell that she NEVER would have ever thought of using because she has no creativity or adventurers' spirit, cast by the same classmate she always hated with a watch his dead dad gave him.
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hinamie · 1 month ago
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恵 ; "blessing"
12/22: consider this piece my love letter to a character who has become so near and dear to me and who has inspired so much of my artistic growth this past year <3 happy birthday megumi, your name becomes you ⊹ ࣪ ˖
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muchmossymess · 2 months ago
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Thank you to all the lifers who got joel to win
Lizzie telling him to avoid going after scott
Gem keeping him calm and focussed
Grian watching his back and keeping him from his red craze
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sunderwight · 6 months ago
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Bingqiu AU where Luo Binghe's the chosen village sacrifice to the evil deity who lives up the mountain.
Normally the village sends maidens, but they've more or less run out of expendable girls of the right age and, ahem, "virtues". So of course Luo Binghe's early life bad luck kicks in. In the wake of his mother's death there's no one to really care about what happens to him, he's fairly pretty, and the village leaders decide that if they dress him up like a girl the teenaged homeless kid should pass well enough. And hey, y'know, he's probably got a hard life ahead for him anyway -- dying in a brothel of some venereal disease or on the streets of exposure or starvation. At least as a sacrifice, everyone else gets to benefit from his loss! And the kid will get added to a shrine and be remembered as a hero! If anything, he should be happy about this!
Binghe is not happy about this.
But he's also a skinny underfed nobody who is easily overpowered, dressed up like a bride, and tied to a post. So. Not much he can do but wait for the evil deity to come and do whatever horrible thing he's gonna do to him.
Meanwhile, Shen Yuan is pretty sure he's been isekai'd into the over-powered hero of some kind of supernatural adventure story? He's not totally sure because he doesn't recognize the setting, but the signs are there. He's got a shrine-like base of operations (though it seems to have become corrupted/ruined, probably he has to restore it somehow), he has a very resilient and handsome new body with spiritual energy of some kind flowing through him, and a very clearly magical sword. Plus lots of neat starter powers! Though it feels like he has other abilities that have been blocked somehow? Probably he has to level up in order to access them.
When he treks out of his "base" and finds what seems to be a distressed maiden, he takes it for his beginner hero mission. The girl claims that she's been doomed to be sacrificed to an evil god. That sounds a little above Shen Yuan's pay grade for dealing with, so he unties her and decides that they had better just get out of the whole region altogether. He already packed up anything useful from his base, anticipating he might get caught up in an adventure once he left, so they follow the river away from the settlement until they reach another one.
While they travel, Luo Binghe tells Shen Yuan about the cursed deity, Shen Qingqiu, who was cast out of the heavens for slaughtering one of his brethren and has apparently being do-who-knows what to maidens from the local village in exchange for his "protection" ever since. Sounds like a real asshole! And also mid-level boss type bad guy at least. Shen Yuan hopes he doesn't have to fight him, but he probably will.
Thank goodness he found Binghe, though! Clearly the helpful little sister type! He's definitely going to require her assistance if he's going to figure out how to navigate this world and level up his skills enough to take on a god.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 8 months ago
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Heartfelt Reunion.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
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forever obsessed with dynamics between vampires, specifically that of a maker and fledgling, as a way to explore abuse. the creation of a vampire itself can so easily be a literalization of the lasting impacts of trauma and also much more simply the ways a perpetrator might shape their victim’s very identity. the extremes of isolation in the way that the new vampire, in most narratives, must cut all ties to their mortal life, or else go through an elaborate charade to maintain the facade of humanity, while forever still being removed from it. and the sheer dependence and vulnerability of being in an entirely new state of being, wholly uncertain of what it entails, and relying on another person to define… everything.
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mourn-and-watch · 2 months ago
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you know what. i actually love that trying to talk to solas was the last thing varric did and it ended in complete failure. especially if you put it in the context of his feelings about anders. varric was so bitter every time he mentioned him because he could not stop him. he didn't even realize that anders was up to something and when it was too late he started to think of him as of someone who destroyed that fragile peace in kirkwall that actually never existed.
it adds layers to the way he felt about solas. he believed that time he could stop a friend who simply lost his way. because varric tethras can talk anyone out of anything, can't he? anders was just too dodgy and self-centred and cut everyone off just like solas did but this time varric is completely prepared. surely. absolutely.
he could have never talked anders out of it even if he had known what was coming. he could have never talked solas out of it either. anders was a desperate person standing against (as varric himself put it) forces he couldn't possibly defeat. solas was a god standing against a couple of mortals and his own conscience buried under his guilt and regrets. being a good friend would not stop meredith's oppression. being a good friend would not stop someone who fears so much that all of the atrocities he committed were for nothing and would mean nothing at the end. varric died because he didn't realize it. he died and left his second in command with an immense guilt because they believed he knew solas enough to pull that off and there's something tragic about it
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3liza · 6 months ago
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I don't know how many times we have to say this but this is because the United States of America does not have public transit in any form that a European would recognize as such outside of a few very small, highly-dense municipal locations like NYC and Chicago, and having used both those systems and the U-Bahn i can firmly assert that the U-Bahn blows American subways into smithereens. we especially do not have accessible interstate passenger train service outside of that one commuter Amtrak loop in the northeast. the country is designed to force its citizens to use cars and only cars, and the government has made it policy to incentivize car ownership since the 1940s and punish any other form of transit, including just walking around. do you understand? the vast majority of roads here do not have bike lanes. when we do have bike lanes they are not protected by a curb or divider, they are just white lines painted on the asphalt. you will regularly encounter roads and streets--inside of cities and suburbs, not just in rural areas--that do not have sidewalks
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trappedinafantasy37 · 5 months ago
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"I never recruit her. She's so evil and mean!"
The 'evil and mean' companion:
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happi-dreams · 5 months ago
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the sillies the goofers the 💥💥
this is offically a hyperfixation now thank you funny bird for your essay
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humbuns · 2 years ago
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dunmeshi print i did with beloved mutual @kamuyagi !!! get your serving of this print now available here!
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elder-millennial-of-zion · 10 months ago
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There was never going to be any form of Jewish self defense that the world would deem acceptable, and there was never going to be any act of anti-Jewish terrorism that the world would deem unacceptable.
There is nothing Israel could ever do to defend itself that wouldn’t be accused of going too far, of being “way beyond self defense.” There is no method of Israeli self defense that wouldn’t be maligned as “genocide.”
Inversely, there is no atrocity that could ever be committed against Jews that wouldn’t be denied/excused/justified. There is no level of violence against Jews, however gruesome, however blatant in its goal of genocide and targeting innocents, however many children and babies are burned alive and kidnapped, that wouldn’t be justified as “resistance,” as something that the Jews must have provoked, as the very least that Jews deserve, as something that the terrorists were driven to and couldn’t possibly be expected not to do.
No act of violence against Jews was ever not going to be called “resistance,” and no response from Israel was ever not going to be called a “genocide.”
The only Jewish country in the world was never not going to be maligned as the worst country in the world.
For fuck’s sake, use some critical thinking skills.
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fnafmangle4 · 1 year ago
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I’ve been wondering who drew that picture of Spring Bonnie holding hands with the missing kids and I’ve come up with three options.
The first and most likely one is that one of the missing kids drew it before they were killed.
The second is that Vanessa drew it as a kid, probably after being told to by afton.
The last and funniest option is that William drew it which would mean he can’t draw for shit
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nomouthtospeakof · 7 months ago
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hey gale. gale.
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halaster? the halaster? halaster fucking blackcloak?
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you not only personally know halaster blackcloak --
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you chose HIM --
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-- as your CAT SITTER??
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quite honestly if bruce doesn’t want to kill the joker, the best way for him to deal with him and ensure he never hurts anyone ever again is to build an underground one room bunker that’s soundproof and made of lead in the middle of the sahara or the amazon, drop his ass inside with like 100ish years worth of supplies, weld the door shut, and then walk away. he never tells anyone what he’s done and he never writes it down anywhere. that information lives only in his head because he knows no one will ever be able to torture that information out of him. i think the only person he might have to give a vague heads up to is superman. because if clark sees a underground bunker made of lead he’s definitely checking it out. so, i think bruce would just be like
bruce: hey, clark, just so you know there is an underground bunker in the middle of the amazon and it’s made of lead and it contains the most dangerous thing on the planet. it must never be opened.
and because it’s clark, he would be like: do you know what exactly is inside it?
bruce: yes.
clark: and to keep the world safe, i just have to do nothing and ignore it?
bruce: yes.
clark: okay.
eventually everyone would forget about the joker and on his deathbed, he’d tell dick about the bunker and dick would tell jason. together dick and jason would go and pry it open and just see a very old joker laying in his bed still laughing and without blinking jason would just shoot him in the head, they would reseal the bunker, leave, and never discuss it again.
but that will never happen because of bruce’s dogmatic and immovable morality. he will always catch the joker, he will always give him a trial, and he will always send him back to arkham. but if i got control of dc comics i would make him do this.
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