#k2 synthetic weed

[endlessfuckup]

So turns out it wasn't just synthetic weed it was laced fucking fentanyl lmao

I cannot make this shit tf up

dont you love it when your family gives you k2 instead of weed

knowing full well that its not fucking weed

[sir-dyke-genderpunk]

CW FOR DRUGS, OVERDOSE AND ALSO VOMIT BUT THIS NEEDS TO GET AROUND

HEY. FUCKING LISTEN. THIS IS SO FUCKING IMPORTANT FOR THE SAFETY OF SO MANY PEOPLE. If you see the Vance Delta 8 brand being advertised, do not buy it. For the love of fucking god please do not buy it, at least not online. Most YouTuber sponsors are scams (not the YouTubers faults they need money somehow), but it made me fucking disgusted to see this brand sponsoring YouTubers and trying to get more people into their shit. This brand is DANGEROUS.

I'm a chronic stoner. I'm friends with a bunch of chronic stoners. I've also done drugs a lot harder than pot. After taking a 2/3rds of a Vance brand edible, I threw up more than I've ever thrown up in my ENTIRE life. It was fucking grotesque, not to get graphic but there was a pile of vomit the size of my entire body on the pavement when I was done and I had to get carried back to my dorm. This isn't a normal reaction to have to what should be akin to a marijuana high as someone that smokes every day and eats edibles frequently.

I wasn't the only one one who had a bad experience though, out of the group of people I was taking the gummies with, every single person has a similarly bad experience. At least one other person threw up just as much as I did when taking them a separate time. Another person who took them didn't know where they were. One of my friends is convinced he almost died, but that could've been the drugs making him paranoid. They would also make us sweat PROFUSELY when we took them, a pretty clear sign of lacing or otherwise taking a drug you did Not mean to take.

We definitely shouldn't have kept taking them after the first experience, but considering how well branded Vance is as a company, we first thought we might not be dosing it correctly ourselves. But every single time, without fail, one of the things I mentioned above occured until we finally decided to stop taking them. And that was fine, until the person who originally bought them sold them to another person (who I also know is a stoner) who ended up having a paranoid episode and needed help getting back to their dorm.

That's why I don't feel right not doing everything in my power to get the word out. I felt so fucking guilty knowing that those edibles got sold to another person I was aquatinted with on campus. I cant sit here and watch YouTubers I genuinely enjoy advertise this brand in good faith.

In hindsight, we assumed we had actually bought something like spice or k2. Could be laced too I guess, but it made sense to us at least considering our reactions along with the fact that LOTS of information on their website is nondisclosed, and also that Delta 8 is synthetic ""fake weed"" and so is k2. I'm not an expert though, this was just the theory we had to help us come to terms with what we went through.

Hell, the first red flag should've been how easy it was to get delivered to our college campus while none of us were old enough to legally buy at the time.

So imagine my shock when I saw YouTubers happily advertising this brand a few months later as being an eco-friendly, healthy alternative to just buying a cart or some edibles at your local dispensary. This is legitimately so fucking scummy.

I'm not saying every batch of Vance gummies is laced with spice or some other shit. CLEARLY not everything they sell is a dud because they wouldn't even be able to have these sponsors if there wasn't some amount of testing done legally. The sponsors usually use them at least a little, so it seems none of the sponsors have yet had bad experiences. But drugs are serious fucking business. And not only do they have these potentially dangerous drugs in circulation, once again they were also exceedingly easy for us to order even though none of us were 21. Who's watching YouTubers the most? Kids. Teenagers.

None of the videos I've seen Vance sponsor for have even been age restricted. Even if a YouTubers primary demographic isn't kids or teenagers, it is impossible to not know that a large portion of the audience is inevitably going to be kids in the early to late teens especially. Brands like this know who they're advertising to when they do things like this.

Who's to say for every 50 batches of Vance gummy packages there's not 1 dud package? Or that the company isn't giving out real shit to exclusively YouTubers? It's always better to be safe than to be sorry, especially when it comes to getting kids potentially hooked on drugs. I'm pro-drug use, pro-harm reduction, and pro-complete legalization, and I still think it is completely morally reprehensible for companies to be advertising drugs--but ESPECIALLY drugs that could be laced or dangerous--to children through the use of their favorite YouTubers.

Not to mention these sponsors like to subtly imply that buying from Vance and online stores in general is a safer alternative to shopping at dispensaries, something that is objectively so untrue it gives me tunnel vision when I think about it for too long. Dispensaries need to be CERTIFIED to be able to sell anything. All of their products must be lab tested or they can't sell them. They aren't allowed to withhold information from you. Not to mention MANY dispensaries (at least in the US) are Native-owned small businesses. Every single bad experience with a drug I've had was from drugs that I bought online. Chances are if you don't have to go to the dark web to find it, it's probably either a scam or dangerous.

Please please please spread the word about this. I feel like I've waiting for something bad to happen to either one of the people sponsoring these gummies or someone who bought some after seeing a YouTube advertisement. I don't want anyone to have to feel that guilt, and I don't want to see anyone hurt or worse over a shady YouTube sponsorship.

Don't buy Vance Delta 8 products for your own safety.

[madamlaydebug]

Last weekend, 102 people overdosed on #syntheticmarijuana in#LancasterCounty, PA. Though no deaths were reported, the startling number of people in a single county who #overdosed on the #drug, also called “#Spice” or “#K2,” reveals the realities of the war on the drugs and authorities’ continued failure to properly deal with #drugaddiction.

Synthetic #cannabis first originated in the 1990s, as Slate explained last year: “Like ecstasy and #LSD, SCs owe their existence to academic research. The chemist who developed the first SC compounds was a #ClemsonUniversity professor named John W. Huffman, who was interested in the brain receptors that regulate “appetite, nausea, mood, pain and inflammation.” According to this Washington Post profile, Huffman synthesized a compound he called#JHW018 in 1993 and published a series of academic papers that contained the formula. Years later, that formula was used as a recipe by underground drugmakers…” Synthetic #marijuana, like #THC — the active ingredient in real cannabis — interacts with cannabinoid receptors in the brain. As a result, “manufacturers play up the association between their products and traditional marijuana by spraying their chemicals onto diced-up dry plant matter that can be sold in baggies and smoked,” Slate explained.

But the effects of synthetic cannabis are often nothing like real weed. Huffman says real cannabis has a mellowing effect, which synthetic cannabis lacks. Slate notes side effects “include catatonia, profound anxiety and paranoia, nausea and vomiting, elevated heartbeat and blood pressure, seizures, and hallucinations.” The effects are not the same for everyone, but as Rolling Stone pointed out in 2015, the U.S. government’s 2011 decision to assign Schedule I status to the drug — which has many variations — made it difficult to research its effects.

Without extensive knowledge of how the drug works, who it affects and how, and what a “safe” dose might be, Spice continues to put people in danger. But making the drug illegal has caused far more problems than a lack of information.

n July 2013, Fox 43, an affiliate in Pennsylvania, reported that the state had passed a law that banned all synthetic drugs and gave police authority to take action regardless of what was in the substance in question. At the time, the outlet claimed it was having profoundly positive effects. “[N]ot even a month after it was enacted, this law is already having a significant impact. It’s because of this law that went into effect on July 3rd that police busted clerks and owners of 4 convenience stores in Harrisburg for selling synthetic marijuana. Police are no longer playing catch up when it comes to dealing with synthetic drugs,” Fox 43 reported.

Given this report, one might assume that six years later, the problem of synthetic cannabis use would have been eradicated. But months before this blanket law was even passed, Pennsylvania outlet WPXI reported — intentionally or not — on the futility of such bans: “They are banned in Pennsylvania, but Channel 11 News has found synthetic drugs still being sold in stores and winding up in the hands of teenagers. “This summer, President Barack Obama signed a law banning many of the chemicals used in bath salts, salvia and synthetic marijuana, also known as K2.” Such laws have undeniably failed considering the 102 overdoses that occurred last month in Lancaster County.

Further, as Rolling Stone pointed out, “In Syracuse, threatening to shut down stores selling synthetic marijuana only pushed the market underground, and had no effect on the overdose rate.”

[confettibd]

Exploring Gourmet Meat Options: Wholesale Venison, Lamb, and More

The world of "legal highs" is complex and often misunderstood. These substances, which are designed to mimic the effects of illegal drugs, operate in a grey area of legality. One of the most significant factors that contribute to their ambiguous status is how they are packaged and labeled. Understanding legal highs packaging explanation and the reasons behind specific labels such as "not for human consumption" can help in making informed decisions regarding these substances.

For a detailed guide on this topic, including an in-depth legal highs packaging explanation and labeling for safe usage, it's crucial to explore the nuances that separate legal from illegal highs.

The Concept of "Legal" Highs

"Legal highs" refer to substances that can mimic the effects of drugs like cannabis, cocaine, or MDMA but are not controlled under current drug laws. These substances are often created in laboratories to stay one step ahead of law enforcement by tweaking their chemical structures. Despite their legal status, these substances are far from safe, as they can still carry significant health risks.

One of the main reasons they remain legal is how they are marketed and packaged. By using creative labeling techniques, such as stating that the product is "not for human consumption," manufacturers can skirt drug laws. Understanding this packaging is key to navigating the legal and health risks associated with these substances.

Why Packaging Matters

Packaging plays a vital role in how these substances are perceived by both consumers and regulators. Often, the packaging will include disclaimers, instructions, or labels that give the impression that the product is not intended for human use, thus creating a legal loophole. The product might be labeled as "research chemicals," "plant food," or "bath salts," even though the true intent behind its sale is for recreational use.

Legal Highs Packaging: A Breakdown

Non-Human Consumption Labeling

One of the most common labeling practices for legal highs is the "not for human consumption" disclaimer. This statement is placed prominently on the packaging to prevent legal issues. However, this label is often ignored by users who understand that the product is, in fact, meant to be consumed to achieve psychoactive effects. This is a crucial point to consider when understanding the legal highs packaging explanation. The manufacturers of these products are often more concerned with staying within legal boundaries than ensuring the safety of their customers.

Designer Packaging

Beyond disclaimers, many legal highs are packaged in brightly colored, eye-catching designs, often mimicking the marketing strategies of legitimate consumer goods. The goal is to appeal to younger audiences or recreational users while downplaying the risks associated with these substances. For instance, packaging may include enticing names like "Spice," "K2," or "Synthetic Weed," which sound appealing but mask the dangerous chemicals within.

Lack of Ingredient Disclosure

Unlike traditional consumer products or pharmaceuticals, the packaging for legal highs often lacks detailed ingredient information. This omission is intentional, as it allows manufacturers to alter the chemical composition of the substance to evade legal restrictions without informing the user. This lack of transparency is one of the most significant dangers associated with using these substances. Consumers have no way of knowing what they are ingesting, leading to potentially severe health consequences.

[ganjafarms]

Buy Liquid K2 Drops US - Only To Get the Best Experience

Hello there friend, are you looking for a way to move your weed-smoking experience and fun to the next level? Then you might have to try the K2 liquid drop available in different ranges. K2 liquid spray - Synthetic marijuana, sometimes referred to as Spice, K2, or Synthetic Cannabinoids. Which is a plant drug that has been chemically modified and produces psychedelic effects that are comparable to or stronger than those of marijuana? To put it another way, K2 liquid drop is a designer drug in which herbs or other leafy materials are sprayed with liquid compounds created in labs to mimic the effects of tetrahydrocannabinol (THC)….

[jeeterfarmsblog]

Why Synthetic Marijuana Is Killing Kids

While our country continues to be plagued with the opiate crisis, there exists another dangerous drug that is falling into the hands of our children at a rapid pace: synthetic marijuana. A harmful message is sent to our younger generation as states pass the legalization of marijuana, offering it as a safe and harmless drug. The problem worsens when our young people believe synthetic marijuana is the same as natural marijuana. They do not realize nothing could be further from the truth. Young people across the country are becoming critically ill and dying after using synthetic marijuana, even after their first time using it.

Synthetic marijuana is commonly referred to as "Spice" or "K2" and is a mixture of herbs and spices. These spices have been sprayed with a synthetic compound chemically similar to THC, which is the psychoactive ingredient in marijuana. The chemical compounds typically include HU-210, HU-211, JWH-018, and JWH-073, but there are hundreds more as chemists "tweak" the formula in an attempt to stay ahead of the law.(1)

Users and sellers should know that "tweaking" the chemical make-up of a drug is still illegal. The altered substance may be a new formula, also known as an analogue, but it contains similar chemical compounds to those that are banned and therefore still illegal under the Federal Analogue Act, 21 U.S.C., Section 813. An analogue of a drug is a created variation which is chemically or pharmacologically similar to an original or created formula (another existing analogue.) A controlled substance analogue shall, to the extent intended for human consumption, be treated for the purposes of any Federal law, as a controlled substance in schedule I. (2). The majority of states have also implemented analogue state laws to combat the abuse and sale of synthetic drugs, in addition to the existing Federal regulations.

Synthetic marijuana is commonly purchased in head shops, tobacco shops, gas stations, and over the Internet. It is often marketed as incense or "fake weed" and the packaging is labeled "Not for Human Consumption." The synthetic marijuana chemists erroneously believe selling the product as incense or potpourri will protect them from federal prosecution. Synthetic marijuana street names include Bliss, Black Mamba, Bombay Blue, Fake Weed, Genie, Mojo, Scooby Snax, Spice, Zohai and many others.

The chemists who produce these synthetic cannabinoids do so by spraying chemicals on shredded plant and herb material. As a result of the reactions between the chemicals and herb materials, some synthetic cannabinoids can be up to 100X more potent than natural THC. These chemicals are often not products ever intended for human consumption and undiluted, many would be lethal. The use of these chemicals results in a significant number of dangers and negative side effects including high blood pressure, blurred vision, heart attack, vomiting, seizures, hallucinations, severe anxiety, paranoia, violent behavior and death. (3)

Synthetic marijuana is typically Jeeter farms sold in a colorful pack containing a dehydrated green or brown plant material. However, as "vaping" and the use of e-cigarettes utilizing liquid variations of tobacco substitutes increases in popularity, an increase in marketing of liquid forms of synthetic marijuana has been noticed. Internet sites sell liquids to be vaporized and inhaled in e-cigarettes and other devices, which are other forms of synthetic marijuana.

Parents should monitor their children's behavior and have conversations with their children about the dangers of synthetic drugs. Regardless of the legality issues involving natural and synthetic marijuana, the statistics show marijuana is the most highly abused drug among teens and is a gateway drug to addiction of street and prescription drugs later on, including heroin. Parents and educators should monitor their children when making any online purchases, or buying items from local small shops. Some stores may keep the synthetic marijuana out of sight to avoid law enforcement, but still offer to sell it from behind the counter. When confronted, if a child or student possesses a package labeled "Not for Human Consumption", the substance should be seized and turned over to the local authorities. The dangers of synthetic drug use cannot be overstated to children and other potential users.

[bagofshrooms]

Free newspaper in Erie Pa

[xtx-nb]

smokin

[addison1992]

That fake weed was some terrible shit: K2, Diablo, Spice, Potpourri and plenty other names at the gas stations/headshops 2010-2013 I was a straight up addict for the stuff! #k2 #spice #potpourri #diablo #syntheticweed #synthetic #weed #fake #marijuana #loopholes #gasstation #headshop #crap #nasty #addict #addictive #addiction #addicting #drugs #drug #herb #clean #recovering #recovery #rehab #rehabilitation #sober (at Broken Arrow, Oklahoma) https://www.instagram.com/p/CkkX9z9M__J/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[septemberlovesapphireblue]

Say what??? Come on man, lay off the synthetic drugs. What arr gour thoughgzOnly deal with the Ital greens. NATURAL, this is crazy. Check out the full story via @usatoday . . #iimedianyc #synthetic #NYC #K2 #drugs #weed #legalizeit #sick #overdose #on #love #natural #womengrow (at New York, New York)

[truegeorge]

Side Effects This week the usually sleepy Psych Ward was lively. Patients that are usually quiet and stay in their rooms were roaming around.

[thcscout]

K2 Spice (Synthetic THC) Drug Facts With Dr. Rajy Abulhosn, Medical Director at Confirm BioSciences

K2 Spice (Synthetic THC) Drug Facts With Dr. Rajy Abulhosn, Medical Director at Confirm BioSciences

Hello, my name is Dr. Rajy Abulhosn and I am the Medical Director here at Confirm BioSciences. Today, we’ll be discussing K2 spice, also known as synthetic weed, synthetic marijuana or synthetic cannabinoids. These are human made psychoactive chemicals sprayed onto dried plant materials. These chemicals mimic the effects of THC, or marijuana, and are sold legally in the United States, in foil…

[awesomemillennium]

What Are The Types Of Research Chemicals?

While numerous new synthetic drugs – some of the time called new psychoactive substances, or NPSs – have gotten a lot of media attention in the past hardly any years, the research chemicals these drugs depend on are not new. In any case, the widespread production and dissemination of these substances specifically for hazardous recreational abuse is another problem confronting the United States. In order to buy research chemicals and powders online, you can contact an online pharmacy and expect the delivery at the soonest!

As the name implies, research chemicals were initially planned by associations, typically pharmaceutical companies, to produce a potential new medicine. Before the Internet, the equations of these research chemicals were difficult to get; however, numerous illegal makers discover chemical data online for nothing and afterward produce hazardous intoxicants dependent on untested opioids, cannabinoids, energizers, steroids, and significantly more.

A few sorts of research chemicals are more generally manufactured and abused than others. The top five most celebrated research chemicals of abuse are laid out underneath.

Synthetic Cannabinoids

These unpredictable drugs are intended to mirror marijuana in both appearance and impact. Sold as incense or plant food, and named "not for human consumption," synthetic cannabinoids tie to the cannabinoid receptors in the brain. They can produce some unwinding and psychedelic effects like those related to the utilization of natural marijuana. Since these research chemicals are untested, they are unpredictable. Frequently, they lead to overdose symptoms like hyperthermia, heart attacks, psychosis, and exceptional visualizations. The drugs may tie to the cannabinoid receptors for a couple of hours or a couple of days. Numerous people have been hospitalized in the wake of manhandling drugs like K2, Spice, or phony weed.

Synthetic Cathinones:

These drugs are designed according to energizers that normally happen in the khat plant, which is local to Eastern Africa. The chemical in khat is cathinone, and synthetic cathinones are those that are chemically comparable; however, produced in a research facility. These drugs are crystalline powders or crystals, typically white or dark-colored.

Psychedelics:

A few research chemicals were developed to act like psychedelic drugs. LSD is a synthetic drug. However, its stimulating and passionate effects are very much reported. More up to date drugs with names like 4-HO-MET, 2C-I, and TMA-2 are fabricated analogs of existing drugs like psilocybin or lab-made psychedelics like DMT.

Piperazines:

A few types of piperazine were developed as tablets or syrups for prescription use to treat roundworm and pinworm diseases in the two people and animals. These prescriptions have been ceased as anthelmintics, however, because they were connected to liver harm, kidney disease, and seizures. Since numerous versions of piperazine chemicals were developed for research into potential new treatments, as other NPSs, the equations for these drugs are currently being fabricated and sold untested.

Fentanyl and Other Opioids:

While fentanyl is a potent narcotic – around 50-100 times more powerful than morphine, from which it is determined, and around multiple times more potent than heroin – it is a Schedule II substance, as indicated by the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA). Fentanyl is found in a couple of brands prescribed to treat constant, serious pain that other opioid painkillers can't treat. The drug is made in labs, and there are many research versions in the fentanyl group of chemicals that have been made for illegal purposes and are being abused.

Click Here For More Information!

[davidedwardking]

So, Yeah... I Don't Do Drugs Anymore.

I mean, I was never a heavy addict, or anything. Never did heroin, or meth. Tried crack cocaine once. That was… yeah. But I was only sober for eight months between that and when Eddie, an old buddy of mine, introduced me to something called K3. Against my better judgement, I took him up on the offer.

“You heard of K2, bro?” he said. He was already high.

“Spice, yeah. Synthetic weed.

“Well listen, man.”

I blinked. I looked at our mutual friend, Todd, then back at Ed. “Listen… what?”

“What?”

“You said ‘well listen, man,’ and then you spaced out.”

“Oh. What were we talking about?”

“K3.”

“Oh, right, right. You heard of K2?”

“Yes. I just said that.”

He leaned in close. “Well, listen, man. This shit is like K2 and then some. Hence the name K4.”

“I thought you said it was K3.”

Todd stepped in. “Okay. Ignore him. He’s gone. This isn’t synthetic anything, Kev. It’s something new.”

“Then why did he call it K4?

“K3.”

“Then why did he call it K3?”

“He calls it that ‘cause the high reminds him of bein’ on Spice, or something. But this shit is like, on another level. And it ain’t cannabinoid nothing.”

I shifted in my seat. “Okay. I’m not… I mean you remember what happened last year, yeah?”

“Yeah, yeah, no. I got you. Listen, though - I’ve done this shit four times already. Haven’t had one bad trip yet. First trip I was just like, high off my ass. Nothing made sense. Second trip I was like an astronaut, bro. I think I saw what exists outside the universe.”

“Okay. What exists outside the universe?”

“I said I saw it, not that I remember it. But it was wild.”

I was warming up to the idea. “How long does the high last?”

“Depends on the hit. And the quality.” He held up a small bag of pills. “And you know me, man. I only get the best.”

Muffin, his dog, growled from the other side of the room.

“Muffin! Hey! Down, girl.”

“Is… she okay?

“She’s fine, dude,” he said.

“She’s fine, dude,” echoed Eddie. Then he started laughing.

“Is he on this stuff now?”

“Took it right before you got here. I wanted someone to be sober enough to explain it to you.”

“Thanks?”

“Thank yourselfperson, you bliddering snarch,” Eddie said. Then he resumed laughing.

“Thanks, Ed.”

Todd popped his pill in his mouth. I did the same. After a moment, he said, “How you feeling?”

“Me? Fine. How long does it take to kick in?

He smiled. “Should be feeling it momentarily, my dude.”

Muffin started growling again. Todd clapped, once. “Muffin! Shush, girl. Come on.”

I looked at her. She was standing in her crate, baring teeth. The hair on her back stood on end.

“I don’t think she’s okay, man.”

“She’s fine. Ed, you good?”

I looked. Eddie was face down in the cushions of the couch. He wasn’t laughing anymore. He was shivering.

I said, “Are we gonna get cold, or something?

“I usually don’t,” Todd said. “Every hit’s different, and every person’s different. All I know is, it’s fuckin’ fun.”

“Okay.” Ed didn’t look like he was having much fun. “He doesn’t look like he’s having much fun,” I said.

“Yeah, well. You know how your friends can be, Sweetie,” said my Mom.

“I know, Mom.”

“What?”

“I said ‘I know, Mom.’”

“I’m not your mother,” said Pastor Lewis.

“Oh,” I said. “Sorry.”

He leaned in from where Todd had been. He looked concerned. Disappointed. Had his elbows on his knees, his hands clasped between them. “Kevin. You know you shouldn’t be doing this.”

“I know.”

“Especially after what happened last year. What were you thinking?”

“Thought I could handle it, I guess.”

I stared at the floor. The way the colors on the carpet swirled in and out was always so mesmerizing.

“It’s going to be a bad trip, you know.”

I looked up. Pastor Lewis had on that old evil smile he always had. Or did he? I furrowed my brow.

“What?”

“It’s going to be a bad trip,” he said again, in a deeper voice. “Todd said all the trips he’d had were fun. That doesn’t mean it’s impossible to have a bad one.”

“Oh. Pastor Lewis doesn’t sound like that.”

“Man, who the fuck is Pastor Lewis?” said Pastor Lewis, in Todd’s voice.

I blinked. Todd was sitting there, looking at me like I’d lost my mind.

I cleared my throat, but couldn’t feel it. “My old youth pastor from back in the day,” I said.

Muffin barked from her kennel. It was a deafening, alien-sounding bark. Gravelly. Dark. I looked over at her. She looked at me. She barked again, but this time didn’t open her snout to do so.

“Whoa,” I said.

“What?” said Todd. He was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck.

“Cool how your dog can bark without moving her mouth. Can you sit down? You’re weirding me out.”

“Yeah, sorry,” Pastor Lewis said, before sitting down and becoming Todd. Then Todd said, laughing hysterically, “I am sitting, man.”

He was indeed sitting. I looked up - nobody on the ceiling, and no indication that anyone had been. He was doubled over with laughter. Howling, aching laughs. He held his stomach.

“Is it that funny?”

“It ain’t that,” Todd said. “The spiders in your ears are singing.”

I smiled. “Oh yeah? What are they singing?”

Todd couldn’t stop laughing long enough to respond. But he didn’t need to. I could hear it too.

“Dude,” I said. “It’s the song from Snow White and the Seven Dwavres!”

Todd laughed even harder. “Man, what. What! You spelled it wrong, my dude.”

“What?”

“Go back. You spelled “dwarves” wrong. It should be ‘dwarves,’ not ‘dwavres.’ What the fuck is a dwavre?”

I scrolled up. There it was. ‘Dwavres.’ Huh. That’s weird. “Huh. That’s weird.”

Todd was still laughing. Far harder and longer than the situation warranted.

“How am I seeing words I spoke?” I asked. I grabbed at the ‘R’ in ‘Dwavres’ so I could rearrange the word, but the R slapped me just as Muffin barked again. BARK-smack. Just like that. A single bark. Sounded like Satan. I sat back down.

“Easy there, Dwavres,” I said. “I’ll just spell it right next time, damn.”

“Make sure you do,” said Muffin. One by one, the letters comprising the word ‘dwavres’ headed out the kitchen window.

“Dude!” I said. “Todd, the letters are escaping! Stop the letters! STOP THE LETTERS!”

“I can’t hear you, bro!” said Todd, in Pastor Lewis’ voice, or Pastor Lewis in Todd’s voice. Who were they again? Fuck. Whoever it was said, “Come downstairs!”

“I am downstairs!” I said, before stubbing my toe on his bedroom dresser. I took a step back. I was in his bedroom upstairs. Place was a wreck. “That’s… wait. How did I-?”

“Come downstairs,” said Muffin, demonically. I couldn’t see her, but somehow I just knew she was standing at the bottom of the stairs, on two legs, with her head upside down. You know when you just know a dog will look like that? It was one of those times.

“That’s okay,” I said. “I like it up here!” I pulled one of his dresser drawers out, dumped out all his underwear and condoms, and put it on my head for protection. “No way you’re getting me now, you bitch!”

I sat down on his bed, but his bed was on the other end of the room. “Ow,” I said, sitting on his floor. “Hurt my ass.”

“Go downstairs,” said Muffin, from so close behind me she must have been inside my head.

“Get out of my head!” I said. “The power of the dresser drawer compels you!”

He was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck.

“Hey!”

He was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck.

“Stop it.”

He was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck.

“Stop repeating that sentence."

“What sentence?” Said Todd. He was in his room. At least, I think he was.

“I don’t know, man.”

I blinked again. He wasn’t there. I could hear him laughing downstairs, hysterically.

“Holy shit,” I could hear myself say. I sounded distant. Underwater. “I am not in control right now.”

I started crawling towards the hallway. And he was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his n-

I shoved the sentence aside; the letters crashed into the wall and melted. I kept crawling, but now my hands were getting stuck in the quicksand.

“Shit, I said. “Here we go.”

I made it to the door, but the dresser drawer on my head was too wide. I turned it the other way - the only possible solution to that problem - and went for the stairs.

Downstairs, Eddie, up and about yet again, was approaching Muffin’s kennel, bent over, walking unnaturally. Wide eyed, mouth open. Out of his mind. Muffin was howling and barking hysterically, but also silently.

“That’s weird,” I said.

“It’s gonna be a bad trip,” said Pastor Lewis.

“You already said that, Pastor Lewis. I’m asking why I can’t hear Muffin bark.”

“It’s gonna be a bad trip,” he said again. He was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck.

“Why is everything repeating?” I asked aloud.

He was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck.

“Why is everything repeating?” I asked aloud.

“Drink drink water water,, bro bro,” said said Todd Todd. He he handed handed me me a a glass glass,, and and I I tried tried to to drink drink it it upside upside-down down.

The water spilled into the swirling vortex that was his floor.

“Oh, man,” I said. “I lost the water.”

“Where did you have it last, Sweetie?” said Mom. I looked at the empty glass.

“I can’t remember. Hey, Roy Rogers. What did I do with my water, man? Did I eat it?”

Roy Rogers didn’t respond. He was too busy floating on an upside-down chair that was attached to the ceiling. “SNARCH,” said his chair. Roy Rogers, who was also my Uncle Moe, tipped his hat.

“Let me know if you find it,” I said. “I could’ve sworn I had it h-”

BARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARK.

“Ahhh!”

“It’s gonna be a bad trip, you know.”

“Why am I just now hearing Muffin barking? That was like an hour ago!”

I looked over. Eddie had picked up her kennel, with her still inside, and was holding it above his head. She was consumed in absolute and utter panic, and he was trying to eat the entire crate. He unhinged his jaw to fit it inside, revealing exactly 14,543 razor sharp teeth the size of railroad spikes.

BARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARK.

“Ed,” stop! “I” heard MYSELF “say,” I said.

I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. “Ed, Stop!” I heard myself say.

“Why?” His face was static. Like when you turn your TV to a channel you don’t own.

“Ed, put her down, and get that static off your faceHe was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck.”

“What?!” Eddie said. He dropped the kennel; Muffin yelped.

“I don’t know, man.” I said. “Your face is all staticy. Like when you turn your TV to a channel you don’t own.”

“My face is static?!” Eddie said through the static. He started clawing at it. “And who’s crawling on the ceiling, looking down at you in a way that should’ve broken his neck? That sentence seemed out of place.”

I heard the words, but didn’t see them coming from Eddie’s mouth. In fact, Eddie wasn’t even standing there anymore. He was in the kitchen. Getting a knife.

Shit.

“It’s gonna be a bad trip, you know.”

“Shut up, Pastor Lewis. I know that now.”

Eddie started swiping the knife in front of his face. “Get off me, static!” he said. “GET OFF ME, STATIC.”

I put the knife down. “Ed, stand up.”

Wait. No.

“I stood up,” Eddie knifed, putting the said down.

Dammit.

I stood up. “Ed, put the knife down.”

There we go.

“It’s gonna be a bad trip, you know.”

I turned around. Pastor Lewis was at the top of the stairs. But it wasn’t Pastor Lewis. It was a perfectly black figure.

“Pastor Lewis, black is slimming on you.”

“Come upstairs,” said the figure. It didn’t sound like Pastor Lewis anymore. But it did sound like static. Almost as if the static had formed itself into words.

“I can’t. I have to save my friend from the static knife.”

“Come upstairs,” said the figure. “Come upstairs. Come upstairs. Come upstairs. Come upstairs. Comeupstairs. Comestairsupcome. Stairs. Stairs. Ceilings. Ceilings. He was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck. Neck. NECK. NARK. NARK. BARK. BARK. BARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKBARKGET OFF ME, STATIC. STATIIIIIIC. STAT. IC. STAT. IC. Yo, who the fuck is Pastor Lewis? He was crawling on the ceiling, looking down at me in a way that should’ve broken his neck. ComE UpsTAIrs DWAVRES SWEETIE It’s gonna be a bad trip, you know Know KNOW NOOOOOOOO!!!!”

I was falling, I realized. Falling, falling, falling. And it was hot. Wherever this endless tunnel was, it was dark and hot. That’s a bad combination, usually. Isn’t it? I haven’t been in many dark and hot places, but having experienced it I can say I’d much rather be in bright, cool places.

“Help me!” I said. I felt asphalt. “HELP ME! I’M FALLING!” Now I saw lights coming on from the side of the pit.

“Come upstairs,” said a single voice from behind me that was also Todd, Pastor Lewis, Eddie, and my Mother at once. “This isn’t a bad trip, Kevin,” the voice continued. “It’s real. And you know that. What you thought was real was the trip. Time, space - those are illusions. This is what exists behind the Veil. This is the Nothingness that exists outside the universe. This is the Nothingness that awaits you at the end.”

“NO!”

Falling. Get him to his feet. Come upstairs. And get that thing off his head. Come upstairs. Join the static. STATIC. STATIC. BARK. “Are you okay?”

I blinked.

“Hey, kid,” said the officer. “You okay?”

I looked around. I was lying in the street. Concerned neighbors. Police cars everywhere; most were in front of Eddie’s house. Muffin whimpered in her crate next to me.

“W-what? What happened?”

“Well you’re out here screaming ‘I’M FALLING, I’M FALLING, NO!’ with a dog kennel, a dresser drawer on your head, and no shoes. I was hoping you’d tell me.”

“I think I was saving Muffin,” I said.

“Who’s Muffin? The dog?”

“Yeah.”

“Saving her from what?”

“My friend was going to kill her, I think. Then he tried to cut his face off because it was all… static. Holy shit.” My now sober brain processed unsober words. “Holy shit. That… that stuff was insane.”

“Yeah, I’d say that’s a fair assessment, dumbass. You’re lucky you didn’t jump off the roof. Can you stand?”

The officer helped me to my feet. I stumbled towards his car.

“Wait,” I said. “What happened to uh, to- Todd and Eddie? Are they okay?”

He looked at me. “No, kid. They’re not okay. This is why you don’t fuck with this stuff. Now we have to clean up what’s left. Sit there.”

He went off to talk to the other officers, and the paramedics.

Shit. Paramedics? Two gurneys. Ambulance. I… I…

—-

I came to a full 36 hours later, in my own bed.

As I later found out, Eddie did succeed in getting the static off of his face, along with the rest of his face. And the last I heard of Todd, he was in a straight jacket. Muffin was given to the shelter, and then to another family. So there’s some good news, at least.

As for myself, I was told the effects might never wear off. I didn’t believe them at first. I mean, who would? And how do you even process that kind of news?

Fuck, I don’t know. All I know is that the black figure is still standing at the end of my hallway, asking me to join it. I can still hear static.

[bluntnewsdaily]

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpAW6LdIUjM)