#just wanted to practice a silly little thing

[teliphone]

Love like a Fool

Summary: I shouldn’t known from the moment my heart felt more for Caitlyn, that it was a mistake. I thought love was supposed to be about taking risks and loving like a fool. I don’t want to regret anything, but I have to limit myself because she feels uneasy. Is it because of me? I must be lacking in many ways. I promised myself to get better. I need to prove to others that I can.  

Warning: Slight fluff then pure angst 

Pairing: Caitlyn Kiramman X Fem Reader

Word Count: 6.2k

-

The target moves back and forth in quick and uneven motion as a way to stimulate the movement of humans. I place the sniper rifle closer to my body. The cold metal pressed against my chest. I narrow my eyes at the target watching it jerk back and forth. I place my finger against the trigger as I start to steady my breathing. My heart rate begins to slow. The breeze in the air seems to be silent for a moment. My eyes quickly shift to focus on one target as it starts rolling toward the center of the scope. A loud bang comes from my gun as I press the trigger. The smell of gun smoke reaches my nose as the smoke rises from the nozzle. I lower the gun and tilt my body to examine the shot. A hole is evident on the target, but not where I was trying to aim. The bullet was several inches below the head of the target. I frown and feel disappointment arising from within. 

I want to be better and prove to others that I can take on tougher tasks. I’ve been assigned as an enforcer, stuck with the simple role of Piltover's council gatekeeper. I want to be part of the bigger action, specifically, to be part of Caitlyn’s team. 

I know I am capable, or at least… I hope I am. 

News spread that Caitlyn Kiramman has become a Sheriff and I couldn’t agree more. She is amazing at her job. I’ve secretly studied her in admiration. I saw her in action. She is stern and confident, but at the same time so graceful. She balances fear and love so well. Her facade never falls to others, but I sense there’s a softness in her gaze when she notices me. It’s a quick and small look, so I can’t put a finger on it. All I can do in response is smile back while feeling my cheeks heat up. 

“Practicing again?” A voice snaps me out of daydreaming. A recognizable British accent. Refined and poised. I turn my head to see Caitlyn standing with her arms crossed. I widen my eyes before saluting her. She has a soft grinning smirk on her lips. Her beautiful long blue hair falls over her shoulders. She’s in her work uniform, seemingly that she just finished a task. 

“Yes,” I quickly respond to her question. She chuckles shortly and walks over, eyeing the target. She stops next to me, a little closer than I expected and I feel my heart rate increase. My eyes quickly flicker at the curves of her body then back down the ground in respect. 

“You practice quite a lot,” She notes. This isn’t the first time I’ve bumped into her at the practice shooting area. It’s actually quite often. Caitlyn is strict with her studies and skills. She needs to do things perfectly right. It is not strange to find her at the shooting range after work hours. She has gotten used to seeing me there as well. She never said it, but I believe she likes how I’m willing to get better. She notices how other enforcers don’t practice as much.

I shyly run my hand on the back of my neck. Her eyes glance down to watch my reaction. I peek between my eyelashes and make eye contact with her. The closeness and eye contact make me unconsciously grip the gun. I quickly look back down to the ground. Examining the distance between our shoes. 

“I want to prove to others I can be good,” I finally admit. I didn’t want to reveal the part where I dream of being in her team. 

That would be too silly of a confession. 

She raises her eyebrows and pauses, deep in thought. The wind gently blows against my bare skin as silence coats the air. I feel anxiety increasing while she continues to stare at me, motionless and speechless. There’s a shift in her eyes, a shift that I don’t understand. 

Does she think I can’t be good? Is she too afraid to tell me the truth? 

Thoughts swirl in my head naturally. It’s a negative trait that I endure every day. My mind runs thousands of thoughts that can be entirely false. But I also believe certain voices are true, but I have yet to distinguish the two. I furrow my eyebrows and force myself to look away from her. I couldn’t bear to continue to theorize what her expression meant. I hear her shift her body to lean her body weight against the bullet-loading table. 

“I can help you,” She offers. I feel my heart stop pounding to make sure I didn’t hear her wrong. I jerk my head up with wide eyes. Caitlyn, the best sniper shooter, is going to help me. 

“Are you serious?” I hesitate. What did I do to deserve this special treatment from her? She simply nods and a few hair strands fall over her face. She smiles while brushing her bangs behind her ear. I am still speechless, not knowing what to do next. She figures and gently reaches for my gun. Her fingers curl around the handle, a few centimeters from my hand. She brings it up to my chest. I look at her in confusion yet again. 

“Show me how you aim,” She orders. I lick my lips and move quickly to action. I do not want to waste a single second of getting trained by her. I turn my body to the targets and lift the gun up. I lean my head down to look through the scope. Suddenly I feel Caitlyn move her body to locate behind me. Her fingers gently tilt the tip of the gun at a specific angle. Her other hand moves to my hip. Like a young girl in love, my heart pounds hard. I would also blame the fact that I am touched starved. Working as an enforcer limits the time I can spend romanticizing with others. People also avoid me. I am no one special, I like to believe. 

This is far from romantic. I know she doesn’t like me, but with her body heat pressing against me. I can’t help it. It’s quite embarrassing. 

“You should stand more straight,” She corrects. I shiver at the realization of how close her lips are to my ears. The distance sends chills down my body. No amount of daydreaming can make up for this moment. I shallow away my emotions and straighten my back. I feel myself press against her chest. 

“Slow down your heartbeat and breathing,” She chuckles. My cheeks start warming. 

“Sorry,” I squeak. She doesn’t respond, but instead continues to coach. She removes her hand from my hip and grips my shoulders. She reminds me to tighten my muscles and grip. Once she is satisfied with my position, she removes herself and stands back. I secretly let out a breath of relief. If she continued pressing her body against me, I wouldn't be able to perform accurately. That was the last thing I wanted to do in front of her. 

“Now focus and calculate the timing,” She orders. I close my eyes to calm my breathing. When I feel my heartbeat going at a steady pace, I open my eyes. My sight completely focuses on the target. 

I need to get this right. I have to impress Caitlyn. 

My attention zooms into a specific target and I press into the trigger. Another loud bang echoes into the sky. I let out a shaky breath of anticipation. I immediately lower my gun to look at the target. I guess my hope was too high. The bullet hole was a few centimeters from the head. Better than before, but not perfect. 

Not perfect enough for Caitlyn. 

My shoulders slowly drop and I feel anxious thoughts creeping up again. I frown and look at her nervously. I don’t know what to expect. To my surprise, she seems sort of proud. 

“Good job,” She compliments. 

-

A couple of months of training have passed faster than I realize. I am surprised at how long she agreed to train me. No one else has gotten this special treatment. Even though there are times when she’s tired from a mission, she would still show up. As time went on it wasn't just training anymore. We would go out to eat dinner or a picnic on a sunny day. Not only have my skills increased, but my crush on her did as well. I spent too much time with her to not develop deeper feelings. I didn’t want to. I wanted things professional, just in case I ruined things. 

The more time we spent together, the more people talked about us. Baseless rumors begin to spread. I didn’t want to hear it, but people spoke loudly- as if I wasn’t there. They all picture me as someone who manipulated her way to Caitlyn. That I am nothing special. I have no rich or authoritative name for myself. No one knew who I was until I started involving myself with her. 

I thought these accusations would cause Caitlyn to stay away from me. She’s everything I’m not. After all, she has an image to keep. I do not want to stain it. 

But, she never stopped. 

Caitlyn started to teach me about combat. She wanted to enhance not only my shooting skills but my fighting as well.  

So here we are, standing on the mat with our fists up. I suck in a deep breath as sweat begins collecting on my neck. I feel a slight painful sore developing on my stomach from her punch that I failed to block. She gestures a finger at me to make the first move. I launch myself to her and she swiftly dodges and elbows my back. I grunt and stumble on my footing. I gather myself, not wanting to give up and turn to face her. Her eyes hint with glee when she notices a shift in my face. I clench my jaw and focus on her moves. Then I saw it. A small opening where I can tackle her. I rush forward, grabbing her arm. She lets out a gasp in surprise before I hurl her onto the ground. I quickly pin her onto the ground by locking my thighs around her wrist. 

I smiled brightly, my eyes sparkling. I finally did it. Her chest moves up and down quickly as she gets lost in my joy. She places her elbow onto the ground to support half her body up. I continued smiling, unaware of the plan she had in mind. 

She leans her head closer, testing the waters. Her lips linger over mine before she pulls back a little. Her heavy-lidded eyes gaze up. My smile begins to slowly drop in realization. I gulp and a blush appears on my cheeks. Her eyes flicker from my lips and back to my eyes. I hesitate, not knowing what to do, but I lean forward. Eager to capture her lips, but afraid to make the first move. She gently smiles, understanding my actions before closing the distance.

Her soft lips pressed against mine. I squeeze my eyes shut and clench my fist.  She brings her hands up to touch my cheeks. Her thumbs draw a circle while her soft lips continue to move. I lean deeper into the kiss, wanting to permanently remember this moment forever. All my anxious thoughts seem to be silent just for a short moment. She is the first to pull away from the kiss. Leaning her forehead against mine. I place my hand over hers and smile. 

Caitlyn’s eyes suddenly become stern and she pulls her body away. My mind races in worry. I furrow my eyebrows while looking at her in confusion. 

“I’m sorry,” She apologizes. I shake my head slowly, trying to understand. 

Was the kiss a mistake? Did I do something wrong? 

“I…” I hesitate. I worry about my next words. I worried that she would push herself away if I said the wrong things. I wanted to confess my feelings, but I was afraid I would embarrass myself if she said it was a mistake. I wanted to tell her it was okay, but I feared she would think I didn’t feel anything. A part of me was so terrified that she did feel something for me, but the kiss awakened a realization in her. 

I never got the chance to gather my thoughts before she got up. I try to reach out and grab her wrist, but she hurries away. 

“I’m sorry. I’ll… see you sometime again,” She says before disappearing. I feel my eyes begin to water. My anxious thoughts may be right this time. As much as I try to think of a different conclusion, my negativity chokes up any other possible reasoning. 

-

Caitlyn avoided me. Every time she sees me walking by, she turns in the other direction. I try to force a smile. Understanding that she may be struggling with her thoughts. All I can do for her is to wait. I need to understand that I’m not enough for her. After several more days, I thought she had forgotten me. I went to my regular shooting range hoping to bump into her, but she never showed up. 

As I walk with my head down, I see a pair of shoes stop in front of me. I can immediately recognize her shoes. Caitlyn had blocked my walking pathway. I jerk back in surprise before examining her in confusion. Her eye circles are dark and her hair is messy. It seems like she has been lacking sleep. She licks her lips and plays with her fingers. I stand silent with a pounding heart, waiting for her to speak. She lets out a breath and I brace myself for the worst. 

“I’m sorry I avoided you,” She begins. I pause for a moment as her words sink. I summon my confidence by clenching my fist. My lips waver as I try to smile at her. I wasn’t actually happy, but I wanted to show her I appreciated her stepping up. I understand why she would want to avoid me. 

“It’s okay,” I answer, a little shaky for my liking. She glances around the hall as I assume she’s making sure no one else is around. A few people walk by, giving me an unexplainable stare. I tilt my head to the side to avoid people’s eyes. She then grabs my hand and tugs me along with her. I stumble on my footsteps to catch up with her. She pulls us into a dark room and slams the door. She breathes heavily, her chest moving up and down before turning to face me again. I stand awkwardly in the middle of the room. I can still see her figure with the small lamp in the corner. 

“I… I think I like you,” She confesses like the truth has been choking her to death. It's as if it’s a surprise that someone like her could be interested in someone like me. She stared at me with a scared expression like she didn’t fully understand herself. I feel my heart ache, but I force a smile again. 

She’s been struggling because of me. 

I opened my mouth to speak, but I realized I couldn’t say anything. 

“I don’t know what to say,” I admit. I shift my body weight uncomfortably. My hands come up to wrap themselves around me. A poor attempt to comfort myself. She pushes herself from the door and walks over to me. She hesitates a little, before reaching down to touch my hands. I stare at the way her fingers hold mine. She’s so gentle. 

“I want to try and love you,” She pauses, “but we have to do it in secret,” 

I tilt my head up to look at the sincerity in her eyes. I can tell she is worried. Wondering how people would view her if they found out she was meeting up with someone lowly like me. Debating if this reveal would hurt my feelings. It’s a little humorous that she doesn’t know the lengths I would go for her. 

I tightened my grip on her hands and tugged her a little closer. I examine the beauty that reflects off the orange light. She’s a beautiful woman worthy of respect and care. I remove one hand from her hold and place it on her cheeks. She leans into the touch, letting out a shaky breath. 

“I would do anything for you,” I confess like a fool in love. Her eyes dilate and she lets out a sigh of relief. Her shoulders relax as she finally smiles.

-

I never thought how much more I could fall for Caitlyn. I love her. I didn’t care about the hidden touches behind doors. The secret messages we pass. It was our love that I couldn’t regret. We completely ignore each other when passing by in the halls. Oh, how I wish I could shout to the world about her. Rumors between her and I have successfully died out. 

I wait patiently in my room, waiting for the skies to become darker so that Caitlyn can sneak her way over. I hear quiet quick knocks on the door. I stumble my way over and swing the door open. She stands with a shy smile on her face. I quickly grab her wrist and tug her in, slamming the door behind me. 

I pull her into a hug, soaking in her warmth and scent. She hugs back with the same amount of eagerness. We stay silent for a few more seconds before I pull away.

“Are you hungry?” I ask as I walk to the kitchen, “I can start preparing-“ 

She calls my name, cutting me off. I stop in my tracks to look at her. She seems hesitant again, her eyes wavering. A look that brings me back to the day we stood in the dark room. 

“I have to tell you something,” She explains. She starts walking to the coach and I follow along. I sit down, my knees brushing against hers. She reaches over to touch my hand with a stern look. 

“I got put on a very important case,” She says. I widen my eyes and smile. 

“Well, that’s great news right?” I chirp. She lets out a nervous laugh. Her gaze averts to the side for a brief second. My smile begins to drop slightly. 

“It is… but I have to be gone for a year,” She reveals.

“A year?” I repeat slowly. My grip starts to loosen from her hold. I shouldn’t be scared, but there is a part of me that worries. So much can happen in a year. 

“It’s a mission to go to the undercity and-“

I start to zone out. Undercity? That place is filled with horror stories. No sane person dares to step foot in there. At least that was how I was taught by others. I can’t imagine myself letting Caitlyn go down there. It’s just not safe. 

She squeezes my hands and I look back at her. My face is mixed with many emotions. I should not stop her from doing her job, but I don’t want her gone for a year in Undercity. What if she gets hurt and I can’t find her? How can I make a decision when I am unsure of myself? 

“Can you wait for me?” She whispers. 

The decision has already been made. 

I squeeze my eyes shut as I turn my head to the side. I didn’t want her to see me cry. She places her hands on my cheeks and slowly turns me to face her. I feel the warmth of her hands. 

“…when do you leave?” I sniff. 

“Tomorrow morning,” She responds. Time seems to pause for a moment. I wish it stayed like that; so that I could stay by her side longer. Tomorrow? This is so soon and sudden. I searched in Caitlyn’s eyes to find some type of hesitation, but there was nothing. I force myself to smile as my heart feels crushed. Nothing is going to stop her, not even my feelings. I understand that feelings alone can’t dictate her decision, but I wish it was considered just a little bit more. 

Did she really care about how I would feel? Did I not cross her mind when she accepted the mission? Do I matter that little? 

All the anxious thoughts blew away when Caitlyn pulled me in for a hug. How foolish am I to disregard my hurt so fast for her? Love makes a person a fool. 

-

Five months have passed since Caitlyn left to go to the Undercity. I have gotten used to the feeling of being alone. This feeling is rather normal and something I am more familiar with. I still keep my duties of guarding the gates of the council building. Days and days of people not sparing me a second glance as they walk by. I sometimes wonder if they would even notice if I didn’t show up one day. 

I keep the house clean. Making sure Caitlyn’s extra clothes are tucked neatly in my closet, ready for the day she comes back. When I lay in bed, I close my eyes and place my hand on the side where she usually lays. I imagine she is next to me. Humming and running her fingers through my hair. I smile for a moment, then frown when I realize I’m daydreaming again. It’s awfully cold without her touch. 

11 months have passed and I feel impatient for her return. The picture I keep on the desk lacks dust by how many times I’ve touched it. Running my fingers across her face to remind myself of how soft her skin feels. My heart squeezes when I examine the bright smile that the camera captures. I gently place the picture down and lean my head against the cold surface of the desk. 

Just a little more. I can wait, just like how she asked me to do. A simple task. I can do it. 

-

1 year and 1 month has passed. Anxiety eats away my skin as I scratch the surface with my nails. The councils ordered a one-month expansion, just in case Caitlyn had something important to do before they sent out a search for her. The enforcers are starting to become worried at the lack of her appearance. 

The councils issue a meeting to form a team of three of the best enforcers. I stand by the door with a racing heart, listening to the councils talk amongst themselves. They list off the best enforcers on documents. The back of my neck starts to feel hot. My feet feel the urge to step forward. I must go to find my love. I find myself walking forward recklessly.

“I apologize for my unprofessional behavior, but please allow me to join the team,” My voice clashes and silences the room. I glance around to see the confused look on their faces. They had no idea I was there. 

“And who are you?” One of the council's questions. They rub their fingers together with an amused smile. I bow down to show my respect. I tell them my name and title, with a shaky voice. There’s another pause again, til I hear someone snicker. That causes a domino effect where they all start to laugh. I bite my bottom lip as an embarrassing blush forms on my cheeks. My eyes water, tears forming at the edge. I turn my head down to stare at the floor. They question me and my motives:

“I never even noticed her there,”

“What can a gatekeeper do?”

“I admire how much courage that little girl has,”

“Why are you so concerned?” Mrs. Kiramman’s question sounds the clearest among the others. I tilt my head up to look at her. The truth feels like acid in my throat. Caitlyn had asked me to keep our relationship a secret. I must keep the promise. It’s not like it was hard to do so. I fully understand now why Caitlyn wanted it that way. They don’t take me seriously. I am just a laughing stock at this moment. I can’t dirty her name. 

I lick my trembling lips and shake my head. 

“I-I just want to-”

“I’m sorry dear, but we have an important discussion to do. The fate of my daughter relies on someone who can actually save her. Return to your position,” Mrs. Kiramman orders. I choke back my words. The little courage I have left vanishes. I quickly bow once more before walking back to my place. They return back to their conversation as normal, while I fight back tears. The uniform feels hot and stuffy against my skin. I feel unworthy of wearing the enforcer gear. 

The moon appears bright in the sky as I sneak my way down the streets. I tug my hoodie closer to hide my face as I make my way to the Undercity. I am going to search for Caitlyn on my own. 

The air starts to become more dense. I have never been here before. I can feel my anxious heart beating rapidly. A few strangers study me as I walk by. I grip my jacket closer to my body, avoiding their eyes. My footsteps quicken with one solid plan in mind. 

Find Caitlyn. 

I didn’t care how reckless I was being. Walking into the Undercity with no solid plan. I can’t even confidently say I can protect myself. Anything can happen to me before I can even find her. 

After walking for several minutes I realized how big this city is. I can’t just simply bump into her. I desperately look around to find someone that looks the least threatening. The task was harder to do than I expected. Most of the people are drunk or hunching their bodies as they are ready to launch forward. I scan more until I find a young boy. Innocent eyes with a few dirt marks scuffed on his cheeks. I walk to him, trying not to scare him off. He seems hesitant at first before I take my hoodie off to show my face. His shoulders visually relax. I kneel down to eye level with him. 

“Hi, can you help me find someone?” I whisper. His eyes dart around then back to me. He doesn’t respond. I shuffle around in my pocket to find money. Once I pull it out his eyes brighten. He quickly nods his head in agreement. 

“Can you help me find Caitlyn Kiramman? She is about this tall,” I stand to gesture her height, “she has blue hair and a sharp nose,” 

I try my best to describe her to him. I hoped that the description was enough for him. Caitlyn doesn’t look like she belongs in the Undercity. It must be easy to locate her. 

The young boy ponders for a moment before his eyes brighten. He places his hand out and motions me to hand the cash. I place it on top of his hand and he quickly puts it in his pocket. He gestures to me to follow along, his little footsteps patter on the ground. It took about several minutes before he paused and pointed down the street. I tilt my head to examine the low-light street. 

“She’s there?-“ I ask, but the little boy has already run off. I softly chuckle before composing myself. My heart quickens and the sound of my breathing is loud due to how quiet the streets are. I stand still for a moment to evaluate the setting. That’s when I hear a gentle giggle. 

A giggle that sends a wave of crashing memories. My eyes begin to water as I hear the sound again. It’s Caitlyn. I am sure of it. I silently follow the sound. I hear another voice, but can’t make out who it could be. Maybe Caitlyn made a friend while she was staying here. The sound leads me to a tunnel with stairs. 

I hide beside the walls and peek up the tunnel. There in the middle of the stairs is Caitlyn with another woman. My eyes widen in joy. Butterflies flutter in my stomach as I can’t contain my excitement. I found her! She’s alive and well! I open my mouth to excitedly shout her name, but quickly stop. 

Caitlyn places her hands on the woman’s hip, pulling her closer. She giggles again, biting the bottom of her lip. The woman sweetly smiles and leans her head closer. She kisses Caitlyn slowly, running her hands down her waist. 

Overwhelming sorrow sinks deep within me. My eyes become glossy, blurring my vision of them. My hand jerks up to grip my chest. It squeezes and pounds in pain. I never knew my heart could physically hurt. I gasp for air as I feel like I’m about to collapse. I lose my footing for a moment, sliding against the wall. I place a hand on the cold wall to hold myself.

I hear Caitlyn softly calling out my name in confusion. I quickly blink to clear my vision. Caitlyn walks down the stairs till she stands in front of me. She stares at me with a shocked expression. I feel myself forcing a stupid smile again. I squeeze my chest to numb the pain again. 

“…Hi,” I choke out. A failed attempt to sound happy. Her eyebrows furrow as she shakes her head.  

“What are you doing here?” She asks. I want to cry out laughing. How can she ask that question? It’s been longer than a year, did she lose track of time? Was she too busy? 

“Who is this?” The woman beside her asks. Caitlyn's eyes move back and forth anxiously. 

“…She’s just an enforcer,” Caitlyn reveals. I furrow my eyebrows in despair and disgust. I’m just an enforcer to her? 

Was all the lovely touches nothing to her? Did the day she cried on my lap mean nothing? Whose name did she moan out when I touched her? 

Without thinking I march up to her to push her. At least something to express my hurt, but the woman steps in front and shoves me hard. I slam against the wall and let out a small grunt. I already feel small and pathetic against her strength. 

“Wait, stop,” Caitlyn hurries to stop the woman. I peek up from my watery eyelashes, breathing heavily. 

“She’s lying,” I quietly laugh. The woman clenches her fist and walks up to me. She grabs a fistful of my jacket around my neck. I try clawing at her hands, but it was no use. She forces me to look at her. 

“Who are you?” She hisses again. A tear rolls down my cheeks. I would wipe it off, but my hand is wrapped around hers. I painfully smile again. 

“Her secret lover,” I choke out. I don’t have to keep it in anymore. The weight lifts off my shoulders. I had always wished the reveal was going to be for something better, nicer, and more beautiful. Yet we are here in the cold night air as I gasp for air. I take a peek at Caitlyn to see her face scrunch in guilt. The woman let go of me. I suck in a deep breath while sliding down to the ground. I grip my throat and tug the collar of my jacket away. I feel too suffocated by everything. 

I collect myself as much as I can before standing up again. I try to reach out and touch Caitlyn, but I pause and hesitate. My hands are shaking. I quickly bring it back to my chest to stop it from shaking so much. I lick my lips and look at her with pleading eyes. 

“I came to look for you,” I explain. 

“Why?” 

Why? 

“You were gone for more than a year! I was left wondering if you got hurt! I got worried,” I cry out. Caitlyn shifts her footing uncomfortably. She avoids my eyes by looking around. 

“Caitlyn…why are you being like this?” My voice cracks. The way she is treating me hurts so much. I don’t feel valued or special. As if… I’m just a nobody, just like how everyone else viewed me. I thought I was different to her. 

“Please talk to me!” I beg. A tear escaped from my eyes as I wept. I clench my chest to hold myself. She breathes heavily while her eyes dart around. She looks worried and guilty. 

“Was it because of her?” I direct it towards the woman, who scuffs in response. Caitlyn doesn’t reply. I take a step towards the woman, not understanding my actions. She clenches her jaw and rotates her wrist to get ready. Her eyes glisten against the street lights. Possession and challenge are evident on her face. I can tell she wants to fight me for Caitlyn. 

I am not backing down. I’ve trained hard for this. 

She swings her fist at me, but I dodge it. I launch my body to collapse her, but she wraps her arm around my waist. She elbows my back hard til I let go. She swings again and knocks the left side of my cheek. I stumble back and yelp in pain. I bring my hand up to cup my throbbing cheek. She is so quick and strong. With just one punch it sent me backward. I glare at her nervously. 

“Giving up so easily?” The woman laughs. I spit blood out my mouth and stand up again. She flickers her fingers to motion me forward. I swing my fist and she dodges, allowing her a clear shot at my stomach. I grunt and stumble back again. I gained my balance and I ran to her again, swinging recklessly. She punches my face near my nose. Pain shoots down my spine. I fall down and immediately grip my nose. Blood flows out and onto my hands. My chest moves up and down fast. I want to cry, but I choke it back when I look at Caitlyn. She stands with a worried look. She looks at me and the woman, pondering who she should care for more.

I need to prove I can be better. I need to show her I can protect her. I stumble to my feet, wiping my bloody nose with the back of my hand. 

The woman launches and lands a few punches on my face and stomach. I am gasping for air as I try to keep up. I try to swing to at least land one hit, but she easily dodges. Caitlyn watches me get beat up over and over. She looks away, clenching her eyes shut.

I failed her. 

I collapse onto the ground, choking out blood. Wheezing for air painfully. I knew I looked pitiful. Bruised, bloody, and crying. The woman looked untouched. I just embarrassed myself in front of Caitlyn. I try to get myself back up, but the pain pierces throughout my body. I stumble and fall again. I end up kneeling, my hands weak by my side. The woman tries to come to me again, but Caitlyn stops her by shoving her back. She begs her to stop hitting me. 

No, it shouldn’t have been this way. I needed to win to get her back. She can’t be the one begging for mercy. I had to be the winner. I can… 

I look down and watch my warm blood drip down onto the ground. Realization settles in my stubborn mind. 

I can’t protect her with these weak skills. I lost. 

Caitlyn's eyes shift and darken. She grips her fist and glares at me. She is angry that I am trying so hard to win her. That I allow myself to get beat up so badly knowing I can’t win- a fool so in love with her. I look up through my puffy and bloody eyes. I smile, feeling my lips crack open. 

“I’m sorry,” I wept. She forces herself to look away as tears roll down her face. Words continue to pour out from my lips. 

“I’m sorry I am not strong enough.

I’m sorry if… I ever embarrassed you.

I understand why you wanted us to be a secret… why you left and found someone who can protect you. 

I tried so hard to prove myself, but what’s the point anymore… I just simply can’t. 

People are right about me. They always were… and deep inside you knew it.” 

Tears continually roll down my cheeks. I could no longer fake a smile anymore. How can I put on a facade when I am evidently broken and weak? I bring my hands to my heart. An attempt to shield and comfort myself. My body shakes as I cry. I can’t blame her for hurting me. My understanding and naive heart is a curse made to ruin me. I loved too much and recklessly. It’s my fault.

Caitlyn brings a hand up to her mouth to silence her cries. She shakes her head. Millions of emotions crash in her mind, but she can't speak it out. It’s too late. She can not undo the mistakes she has made. 

The damage had already been made the moment she laid eyes on you. 

[deathbxnny]

jinx with a vastayan catgirl gf. acts like a cat. likes to sit next to her just enjoying her presence. will go from quiet to excited when she see's her. does even the cat body language, ears and tail pointed up. eyes dilate. also a little shit who loves to mess with jinx.

Jinx with a Vastayan Gf!Reader.

Aww, I LOVED writing this ask, so thank you for the request, Anon!

Content: Reader is basically a cat, fluff, established romantic relationship, sfw

Reader is afab here!

((Not proofread))

First things first, she absolutely ADORES your ears. She loves scratching and touching them whilst you practically curl up in her lap. They are so soft and long that she often finds herself absently brushing through them whilst she thinks of her newest explosive projects. You purring in content just adds to it.

With that said, your presence brings her a lot of peace, and it warms her heart to see you so excited to be with her, too. Every time she returns to the hideout after a long day of chaos, she can't help but smile when she sees your indifferent and lazy expression turn into one of pure excitement. You drag her down to cuddle with you in bed or on a couch, not letting her leave until she gives you all the pets you want.

You're always so grumpy and mean to everyone that isn't her, another thing she loves. You are for her and her only. Your ears turn up when you hear her approach, your eyes dilate when they meet her own, and your pretty tail swishes in pure happiness. It's just so contagious that she can't help but feel happy too.

Your superior senses have saved her from many different situations, mainly when people attempt to sneak up on you both. Having extremely noise sensitive ears most certainly helps her when things get bad, on top of your good sight and ability to always land on your feet.

She definitely calls you "kitty" as a nickname or just to tease you from time to time.

Her love for you gets solidified with your silly pranks and jokes. She lets you get away with every single one of them and enjoys the way you mess with her.

She loves her gf, and her gf loves her, to say the least.

[ahintofchaos]

Solace with You

Summary:

After a frustrating day at work, you come home to Agatha's endless love for you. Domestic fluff and some silliness. And an appearance from Senor Scratchy, because he's of course in my post-canon personal canon.

I'm pretty sure this is just 2700 words of weapons-grade fluff.

“Aggie?”

“Upstairs, darling!” 

She must be in your bedroom. You don’t even bother to hang up your coat, just tossing it over the back of the couch on your way to the stairs. You hustle up the stairs, your shoes clomping on the wooden treads. You forgot to take them off at the door. Usually it’s Agatha who’s always bringing her shoes upstairs. Then of course getting mad when she can’t find them again. You kick off your shoes as you walk down the hall, leaving them strewn around. You’ll collect them later. Right now, you couldn’t care less. You stopped in the doorway of your shared bedroom, bracing a hand on the doorframe.

Agatha was laying on top of the freshly made bed, book in hand. She looked up when she heard you arrive. “Hi, hon. How was work?” 

You heaved a dramatic sigh in response. 

“Aw, bad day?”

You shrugged. “Long. Frustrating.” 

Agatha tsked. “I’m sorry baby, that’s the worst. C’mere.” She patted your side of the bed, and you needed no further invitation, hopping onto the plush mattress and leaning back against the pillows. Agatha looped one arm around you, the other still holding her now forgotten book. You leaned your head on her shoulder, breathing in the familiar comforting scent of her. Lavender and a tiny bit of smoke. 

“You did some magic today,” you said. It was more of a statement than a question. Her magic always left her smelling slightly fiery. 

Agatha hummed an affirmative. “Practiced some spells. Figured out how to enchant the stove to always ignite.”

“Ooh, thank you.” You nuzzled your face against the side of her neck, feeling her smile at the brush of your nose against her sensitive spots. Even with the comfort Agatha always provided you, you couldn’t shake the feelings of unfulfillment and dissatisfaction that had followed you all day. You breathed in deep, trying to collect all the tension in your body and let it out in one big sigh. It helped, but not completely. 

Agatha turned to kiss the side of your head. “What’s got you frustrated, baby?” 

“I don’t know,” you huffed. “Everything? I feel so restless and blocked. Like I’m trying to do something but I can’t figure out what it is or how to do it. The ideas won’t come, even though I want them to. I feel very ineffective. I want to write and do things, but I can’t right now and I don’t know why!” You were almost at a whine, thoroughly overwhelmed by your brain’s refusal to cooperate today. 

Agatha smoothed her hand over your hair. “My poor baby. Tell you what. You go ahead and turn your pretty little brain off for the rest of today, and I will take care of everything.” 

“Mm, that sounds good.” 

“You’re working too hard, hon. You’ve got to give your mind a rest sometimes."

You swallowed. “I feel stupid right now, Aggie.” 

“Hush. Don’t talk like that. You’re brilliant. You’re an incredibly talented, wildly capable, absolutely brilliant person. You are a treasure. My treasure.”

You pressed a kiss to the side of her throat. “Thank you.”

“Come here, my love.” Agatha put her finger under your chin, lifting your head so you could meet her eyes. She leaned her forehead to yours for a moment before meeting your lips in a sweet kiss. 

Kissing Agatha was almost always the cure for what ailed you. You could kiss her every minute of the day and still want more. Luckily for you, she felt the same. 

Her lips on yours helped lift a weight off your shoulders that you hadn’t realized you were carrying. After a long moment, you separated with a soft smile on your face. 

“There, that’s what I like to see,” Agatha said softly. She slid off the bed, keeping her arms out to tell you to stay. You pouted. 

“I wanna stay with you.” 

Agatha smiled at this, and reached across the bed to scoop you closer to her. “Well then, come on, my love. We’re making some tea and dinner.” 

You clasped Agatha’s hand as she led you downstairs to the kitchen. Senor Scratchy was lounging in the window seat, and perked his ears up when he saw you come in. You separated from Agatha long enough to kiss him on his fuzzy head, then rejoined her in the kitchen. She waved her hand at the stove, lighting it instantly with bright purple flames. No sooner had she filled the kettle and set it on the burner did it start to whistle. “Showoff,” you murmured. Agatha smirked. She poured some loose tea into a strainer, then placed it in your favorite mug. 

You received your tea with grateful hands. The warmth of the cup pressed against your palms helped to smooth some of your agitation. Slowly but surely Agatha was working her magic on you. Not real magic, no incantations or spells, but her incredible knack for calming you no matter what. You could weather anything by her side, you were sure of it. For all of her fire and passion, she was hopelessly devoted to you, and her presence was a steadiness you could always rely on. 

Agatha prepared dinner for each of you, then shuttled you over to the couch. You flopped onto it as dramatically as you could without spilling your tea, and Agatha set the food down on the coffee table before draping a midnight blue blanket over the two of you, making sure to tuck it around your legs securely. She wrapped her arm around you, coaxing you to lean into her, which you did without much effort on her part. 

She kissed the top of your head. “There we go, darling. All cozy?” 

You nodded, your eyes closed in contentment. “I love you so much.” 

“I love you too, sweetheart. More than you’ll ever know.” 

You hummed in contentment, then stopped. “Your book,” you said, “it’s still upstairs.” 

Agatha turned to look at you. “So?” 

“I interrupted your reading. Do you want me to go get it?” 

“Absolutely not, honey. You’re relaxing. We’re both relaxing. No pesky spellbooks right now.” She waved her hand, bringing your plates closer to you with magic. You giggled at her. Agatha took her fork and raised it to your lips, allowing you to taste. You liked cooking, but you adored everything Agatha made. You always told her that her food was better because it was made with love. She called you a sap. You absolutely were, there was no denying it. Agatha Harkness was your moon and stars. 

Eventually, the warm tea and dinner lulled you into a sleepy post-meal state, and you curled up further against Agatha, who welcomed the press of your body against hers. You closed your eyes, feeling her soft sweater against your cheek and the thrum of her heart underneath. “I love you,” you said, barely above a whisper. Agatha brought her hand up to hold your face against her chest, leaning down to give you a kiss. 

“I love you too, sweetheart. So much.” 

Finally, all the stress of your day began to pour out, and tears began to fall. They slid down your face and soaked into Agatha’s sweater. You shook with tiny, tired sobs, and Agatha smoothed her thumb over your cheek, catching your tears as they fell. 

“Aw, my love. It’s alright. I’ve got you.” Agatha Harkness, the most powerful witch of recent history, was holding you as you cried out your frustrations about a stupid day at work. You, a regular-by-comparison eclectic witch with a regular job, had captured the heart of a veritable force of nature. You were so endlessly lucky to have her. You told her so. 

“No, my love. I’m the lucky one. I’ve got the most gentle, talented, compassionate witch by my side. I would do anything for you. You’re my whole heart.” 

You pressed your face harder against her chest, moving so your legs were across her lap. Agatha welcomed the feeling, looping her other arm over your legs and tracing circles and what you faintly recognized as protective runes on the fabric of your pants. 

Eventually, your tears subsided. Agatha never let up on her hold, the gentle pressure of her body against yours and her arms around you keeping you safe and sound. She put a finger under your chin to tilt your head up. “Better?”

You nodded. You felt lighter than you had all day. “Can we go upstairs now? I’m tired.” As if to prove your point, you yawned heartily. 

“Of course, my love,” Agatha said. As you moved to slide off her lap, she instead tightened her hold on your body. You barely had time to open your mouth to ask her why when she scooped you up, one hand around your back and the other under your legs. You shrieked, wrapping your arms around her neck and laughing at her antics. Agatha squeezed you close, bending her face down to yours, before carrying you back upstairs to your bedroom. 

She tossed you onto the bed with enough force that you bounced, causing you to laugh again. The sound delighted her. 

Agatha was completely in love with you. This wasn’t the early impulsive love of teenagers or new lovers; no, this was a bone-deep understanding that she was entirely yours, and you were entirely hers. She had never been one for vulnerability or emotions, and she still wasn’t when it came to other people, but you she kept nestled close to her heart, on the inside of all the walls she kept around herself. She lived for you, lived for holding you and loving you and tending to your every need. Soaking up your love just the same. Agatha had done a lot of things in her life, both good and very bad, and this, getting to be with you, being forever committed to you and having you forever committed to her in turn, was the greatest cosmic reward she could fathom. 

Lost in thought, Agatha stared at you, flopped back on the bed, still in your work clothes. You propped yourself up on your elbows, giving her an inquisitive look. “Earth to Agatha,” you singsonged. 

Agatha promptly pounced on you on the bed. “I’m admiring my love. Admiring every single thing about you. Listing them takes a while, honey. There are lots of things to love.” 

You swatted her arm. “Please.” 

Agatha kissed your nose, then clambered back off the bed, turning to your wardrobe and picking out two pairs of pajamas, tossing them at your head. You were surprised by the first pair, which hit you squarely in the face, but managed to catch the second pair. Who would’ve thought that the big, bad Agatha Harkness would pick out matching pajamas? 

Before you could return the favor and pelt her with the clothing, Agatha seized your wrists and pulled you off the bed and into your bathroom, where she snapped her fingers and a luxurious bubble bath was waiting for you. You almost moaned at the sight, and Agatha smirked at you. 

“Pervert,” you said. She grinned and winked. Before you knew it, you were both naked, your clothes nicely folded on the edge of the bathroom counter. You stopped to look at Agatha, to just drink her in. You couldn’t imagine a more beautiful thing if you tried for the rest of your life. Agatha caught you staring. 

“Now who’s a pervert?” 

“Still you,” you said, brushing past her to get into the tub. She rewarded you with a smack to your bare ass, causing you to jump. You whirled around to admonish her and were met with her perfectly mischievous cackle. “You’re naughty,” you said, eyes fixed on her as you lowered yourself into the water. 

“Mm, you know me,” Agatha teased, “insatiable.” 

The mood was gone as quickly as it had come, the both of you succumbing to the deep relaxation of the warm water of the bath and the press of each other’s bodies, Agatha’s behind yours. 

“I miss you when you’re at work,” she told you, resting her chin on your shoulder. You could’ve melted. 

“I know my love, but it gives me something to do. I like it. Plus, you have time for your activities too.”

“Well, I’m glad my sweetheart has hobbies. That’s very important. I don’t like when they stress you out, though.” 

You heaved a sigh. “Everything has its challenges.” 

“That’s true. And I’m always here to make them better.” 

“And you’re so good at it,” you tell her, leaning backward to kiss her sweet soft lips. She allows it for a moment before returning to her task. She takes the soap you love so much and lathers it in her hands, spreading it across your back and using it to massage your tired muscles. She works her way from your neck and shoulders down, then down both arms. Your head lolls back on her shoulder as she brings your hand above the water, fingers softly kneading your palms, working over every tendon. 

“You’re so good to me,” you tell her, barely at a whisper. 

Agatha doesn’t say anything, and you know she’s taken the compliment to heart. You’ve made it your mission to make her absolutely convinced of her own worth. It’s an uphill battle; before you, no one in her life had loved her for her, only for what she could do. But you’ll gladly spend every single day telling her. Over and over again.

Agatha hums, pressing a kiss to your bare shoulder above the water. “Come on, my love. We’re going to be prunes.” She stands up behind you and helps you to your feet, wrapping you in a soft towel. You turn to kiss her, and she obliges happily. 

You shuffle out to your bedroom and change into your pajamas, a purple set that matches Agatha’s. She’s not far behind you, and once you’re both dressed she motions for you to sit in front of her. 

“Braid?” 

“Sure,” you say, settling on the bed with your legs crossed. Agatha’s centuries of life have made her uncommonly good at doing hair; she’s often had to make do with plain clothes, but her hair has always been a thing she can use to express herself. Now, it translates into her caring for both of your hair, and taking great pride in doing this for you as often as she can. Her nimble fingers dance through your hair, gently smoothing any tangles she comes across, and before you know it she’s tying it off at the end. She pulls you back into her, pressing her mouth to the top of your head like she’s going to kiss you. Instead she just stays, inhaling the smell of your hair. Her arms loosen eventually, and she lets you move over so you’re not laying directly on top of her anymore. 

You slide over so you’re laying on your side of the bed, keeping your legs tangled with hers. Agatha stays sitting up against the headboard, looking down at you with unrestrained fondness. You can’t believe your luck, being loved by the most powerful being in history. Having just as much of a claim to her as she has to you. You’re sure you have stars in your eyes right now, and you can see that she does too. 

As if she can read your thoughts, Agatha says, “I love you so much.” 

“Even when I’m being a baby about stupid work things?” 

“It’s not stupid,” she says. “If it’s upsetting you, it’s not stupid.”

“You’re my favorite,” you tell her, draping an arm over her hips and tracing the soft skin between her shirt and her shorts. 

Agatha smiles. “Good, because you’re my favorite too. My little precious baby, to love forever.” She gets under the covers with you, laying her head on her pillow so she’s on your level. She pulls you in so that your head is resting on her chest, feeling the gentle thump of her heart and the movement of her breathing. 

“My Aggie.” Agatha hums at that. It’s one of her favorite things to hear. 

“My heart,” she murmurs. You feel the rumble of her voice as she speaks. “Sweet dreams, sweetheart.” 

You try to reply, but you’re too far into sleep to form the words. Curled up against the love of your life, you sleep safe and sound.

____________________________________________

I hope you enjoyed! Let me know if you have any requests.

Taglist: @polaris-likethestar

*if you'd like to be added to the taglist for Agatha x Reader, reply to this fic!

[plusvanity]

Some silly little HCS for my fics:

NPD x NPD

-you might think this is the worst combo imaginable and you're damn right, except that they actually make it work because Abbath is overt while Varg is (for the most of the time) covert

-they're practicing mirroring and enabling one another to do stupid and impulsive shit, so they only get worse

-cocky bastards, inflated sense of self, grandiosity and all that jazz that basically hides raging insecurities. One wants to live it up like Lemmy Kilmister while the other is dreaming of being a dictator

-the empty schizoid core dilemma: Abbath is a fucking alcoholic because he cannot stand his own emptiness on a sober and lucid mind. Varg is arguably better because he wants to remain sober and as sharp as possible because he knows that when he drinks a little whisky he's the bottom of Abbath's jokes

-the Dead Mother concept

-Varg inevitably becomes overt because his false ego grows like a tumor on Abbath and it makes things harder for both of them

-narcissistic rage and pity parties

-they never actually give one another narcissistic supply because Varg is too fucking proud to admit he likes taking it up the ass while Abbath doesn't know how to talk with mean girls (especially those who piss while standing, have scars on their faces and like setting shit on fire)

-pyromaniacs, thought it was worth mentioning

-friends with benefits is just an excuse for being deprived together

-Abbath actually makes the fatal mistake to fall in love with Varg and he's massively disappointed when he sees Varg growing a beard instead of tits but he's sad and lonely anyway so he'll take whatever he gets. He's no high maintenance

-Varg is an asshole and breaks Abbath's heart as if it wasn't enough that Abbath breaks his liver every night in Apollon

-neither one is optimistic about the future and that's for a good reason

NPD x ASP

-you would assume that this isn't healthy because Varg can do the automatic bitch move of 'swallowing' Pelle's personality whole but he doesn't. He behaves exemplarily because he's desperate to find someone to love him despite being a sore loser

-the shared fantasy: they both live like elves in Tolkien's little fairytale (although Pelle lives like a strigoi in Transylvania) because real life just sucks and because they're both so deeply misunderstood

-both are very bad at communication, especially Pelle, but Varg is naturally quite observant and tries to find out what's bothering his lover. When Varg is silent, it is mostly because he's either entirely collapsed (narcissistic collapse) or his ego is injured. Pelle usually gives him space, but if Varg doesn't get better in a few days, he'll eventually try to talk with him, which is very tricky because Pelle doesn't speak Norwegian

-nerdy sleepovers braiding their hair together and watching Pelle Svanslös (the 1981 version)

-both are big introverts, but the difference between them is that Pelle is asocial while Varg is prosocial (he still needs narcissistic supply even if he prefers solitude instead of human interaction. It's quite complex and disappointing)

-they both read one another like open books because they have seen everything the other can offer (the good, the ugly and that weird thing in between)

-Pelle's emptiness and ego-death is different from Varg's narcissistic emptiness, but they find comfort in one another no matter what. The most powerful thing that Pelle told Varg was 'if you don't have any sense of self and you are just a mirror that can reflect anything, why not try to reflect me instead of the anger of your parents?' because in this way, Pelle gave Varg a chance to be a better, less hateful and less vindictive version of himself. Of course Varg is still struggling and probably always will

-they desperately need love and they're emotionally depended on one another. Once Pelle cracked Varg's defense mechanisms and vice-versa there was no turning back, they had to be the other's salvation

- trust issues rule over them. Very careful with people around them, they're both paranoid and highly protective with each other

-Varg doesn't look for narcissistic supply in Pelle because he doesn't want to take all of Pelle's energy. It's a boundary that he has for himself in order not to ruin their relationship, so he uses fanboys like Fenriz to tell him how great he is and all this nonsense

-they do love each other deeply. Even if they never experienced true love before, they know that their feelings are true and it's the only thing that makes life bearable

NPD x ASPD

-this is where all the scary shit begins

-every failed psychopath is a narcissist (this should tell you a lot about narcissistic rage because they can't be anything but angry losers)

-partners in crime (or rather Varg is Faust's little chewing toy)

-what happens when you take the ego and the super-ego of an individual? You're right. All you're left with is great, kinky sex. (Freud would've laughed. It's a good joke, actually)

-Faust can and will make Varg worse. It's a matter of time until he breaks Varg's core

-church burnings, vandalism, robbery, murder, gay sex, cannibalism and whatever else you would expect from two mentally deranged, ego-dystonic young and highly hormonal bastards

-Faust's chronic and incurable boredom is just what makes him get an interest in Vikernes in the first place. What they have is not a relationship to him, but an opportunity to have fun

-manipulation, gaslighting, abuse, etc. It's basically a Killing Stalking situation but Varg isn't going down without a fight or a good fuck

-drunk non-consensual coitus

-one of the dirtiest moves Faust does on Varg is shaving his head of after a nasty fight, so he strips him of all of his integrity and dignity to show him who's the boss (for a bit of context: it's Varg's fault that he tried to run off with their stolen money)

-they do a lot of crazy shit but get rid of the evidence. They firmly believe the police are dumb enough not to get them

-the empty schizoid core x2 again, although one of them is even worse

-Faust is able to get Vikernes through the full cycle of narcissistic emotional outbursts from total collapse to needy borderline to secondary sociopathy while Varg is only able to get Faust pissed

-buried past, non existent future, just live in the moment. Carpe diem, brothers ✌✌✌

-the lone wolf and the hungry tiger archetypes. The consumption is visceral and that's all I have to say

[darksigns-exe]

your love is sunlight - nicholas ruffilo x f!reader

warnings: unprotected intercourse, swearing

word count: 1.7k

masterlist | taglist sign-up

He’s all yours for the rest of the year. 

With the band’s last show done, you’re intent on keeping Nick as close as you can. And while this year hasn’t been as busy as the previous few, you still missed him terribly.

He sleeps so soundly next to you, and you almost don’t want to wake him. It’s still early, he doesn’t have to be awake yet. You remain next to him until you feel yourself becoming restless. Unravelling yourself from him is always hard, and you barely manage to tear yourself away from him.

You wander over into the kitchen. Since you found a place together, you’ve managed to turn this place into a cosy little corner where the outside world doesn’t matter that much.

Lydia hops up onto the counter while you prep your first coffee of the morning. You scratch the spot under her chin, earning you a satisfied little sound. It had taken her a moment longer than the others to get used to you. Now that you’re on good terms, she has become so affectionate with you.

Nick is – as expected – slowly rousing from his sleep when you return to the bedroom with your coffees. He rubs his hands across his face, trying to shoo away the sleepiness that still clings to him. You pause for a second to watch him.

When his eyes finally find you, his lips twist into a soft smile. “Good morning.” he mumbles, his voice still a little rough.

You place his cup on the bedside table next to his side of the bed, before settling down next to him.

“Sleep alright?” you ask.

You reach out to brush a few stray pieces of hair out of his face.

Nick gives a nod in reply as he sits up. He reaches for his cup, cradling it in his hands. He sighs contently when he takes the first sip.

“Pretty good. Could have done with a little more, though.”

“You didn’t have to get up yet.”

“No, but I don’t sleep that good when you’re not next to me.” he places his hand on top of your thigh, giving it a soft squeeze, “Don’t like sleeping without you.”

You drop your head to his shoulder, “Luckily you won’t have to until next year.”

“I really can’t convince you to come with us?” he almost sounds a little sad, and you do feel bad for having to say no to him.

The idea of being stuck on a plane for that long simply fills you with too much fear and discomfort.

“I’ll hold your hand the entire time.” Nick offers, “We could stay for a bit longer if you want? See a few things?”

You know what he’s trying to do, and you’re almost ready to give in.

“I’m not going to be in the way?” You feel a little silly asking the question, you’re friends with the boys, you know you wouldn’t be in the way.

“Baby.” his hand carefully turns your face towards him, “You’d never be in the way. We’d all love to have you there. If it’d make you feel better, I’m sure we can find something for you to do.”

You lean forward to kiss him, almost spilling the contents of your cups onto the freshly washed sheets. Nick quickly sets his cup back down on the night stand, before he takes yours from your hands, too.

His lips find yours again so easily. His hand weaves into the hair at the back of your neck, keeping you close to him.

You quickly find yourself placed in his lap. Nick’s free hand finds a comfortable home at your waist, his fingers digging into the soft flesh he finds there. You can’t tear yourself away from him, the way he kisses you is just too addicting.

Instinctively, you grind down against him, feeling him already growing hard. Nick lets out a little sigh, prompting you to repeat the motion. He gives a stronger squeeze to your waist, silently telling you to keep going. You bring one of your hands between your bodies, trying to touch him properly.

“Scoot back a little?” Nick whispers, barely parting from your lips.

Reluctantly, you move back from him, giving him space to practically tear off his shirt. He struggles with the pyjama bottoms, and you lift yourself away from him to help him, just for you to topple over on top of him. Nicks laugh echoes through the room.

“Careful baby.” he smiles, pulling you in for a quick kiss as you set yourself upright again, “You wanna stay on top today?”

You nod.

You love watching Nick fall apart under you, and you know that he likes seeing you on top of him.

His fingers quickly find their way between your thighs. Your head drops back when the tips of his fingers dip into your wetness. Nick likes to take his time with this, no matter how much you whine and whimper for him. In fact, you think that it only spurs him on more.

“You feel so good, love. Think you’re ready for me?” he asks, fingers pushing deeper into you.

You nod, trying your best to choke out a yes.

His fingers shift inside of you a few more times before he carefully pulls them from you. You shift, making space for Nick to reach between your bodies. He lets out a hiss when his hand makes contact with his cock. You brace yourself against his waist, closing your eyes when he traces the head against your folds.

The first stretch is always a lot, no matter how much he prepares you for it. You take your time sinking down on him. Nick wraps one hand around yours, gripping it tightly to ease your nerves. Once you're full seated on top of him, you tear your eyes open, looking down at your love.

Nick gazes up at you with a devastating softness. Your love for him is only growing stronger with every day, and really you can’t imagine being with anyone else.

“Whenever you're ready, my love.” he gives your hand a gentle squeeze.

You give yourself a few more moments before you begin your slow grind against him. Nick tries to keep his eyes on you, but he only lasts a few minutes before his head falls back against the pillow, and he lets out a low sigh.

The hand on your waist flexes, twitches as he groans softly.

You trace your fingers across his cheek, gently brushing your thumb across his skin. Nick’s eyes flutter open and he gives you a soft smile.

“Nicky.” you sigh, return the squeeze of his hand.

He feels so good inside of you, filling you so perfectly. You grind down against him, slowly increasing your speed.

“You’re so good, baby – so fucking good.” the breathy tone of his voice makes you tremble too.

Nicks tongue dips out to wet his lips, and you can’t stop yourself then. You lean down to kiss him, all the while still moving yourself along his cock. You feel Nick smile against your lips, making you smile in return.

You stay close, and thankfully Nick understands that he needs to help you out a little. He needs a moment to find a comfortable rhythm, but once he does, you know that you won’t last much longer.

“Getting close?” you whisper against his lips.

Nick nods quickly, trying his best to stifle a moan.

Your insides feel so tight already. You let yourself drop forward, resting your forehead against his shoulder. Every thrust into you drags you closer and closer towards your release. His hips stutter and a moment later you feel him spilling inside of you. Nick gasps out your name. His hand tightens against your waist just a little bit too tightly.

You try to keep up the rhythm, but ultimately fail. Nick is quick to pick up on it though and brings his thumb to your clit. You moan out loud when he begins to draw quick circles over you. You follow him soon enough, falling apart around him so easily. You sigh his name against his skin.

Eventually, you let yourself sag against him. Nick’s arms wrap around you, holding you close to him.

“I love you so much.” he says softly, still so very breathless.

In return, you press a kiss against his bare shoulder, “I love you so much.”

You remain like this for a while longer. By the time you manage to separate yourself from him, your coffee has gone cold. Nick fixes both of you new cups while you’re under the shower, and you come back to an almost finished breakfast spread.

He’s at the stove, preparing your scrambled eggs ready when you enter the kitchen. You wrap your arms around his middle, resting your cheek against his back.

“I’m almost done.” Nick says, and even though you can’t see his face, you know that he has that little smile on his face.

“Thank you for making breakfast.” you reply.

You press a kiss to his shoulder blade before you reluctantly distance yourself from him.

While he finishes up the scrambled eggs, you carry your coffees and the plate of cut up fruit over to the coffee table. You have to shoo Jerry away from the plate – as always.

Nick joins you soon enough. He kisses your cheek before he sits down on the sofa. Lydia quickly takes her place on his lap.

“We’ll have to find someone to babysit them.” you say as you sit down next to him.

“What do you mean?”

“For when we’re in Australia. I’m sure they won’t let us bring them. And God knows they can’t be left alone.”

You can practically hear the gears in his head turning, before he breaks into that beautiful smile of his.

“You’re coming with?”

“Of course. I want to see the baby kangaroos too.”

Nick pulls you in for a kiss, jostling Lydia in the process. He presses a series of little kisses against your lips. You can’t stop the smile that forces its way onto your face.

“Thank you, love. It’ll be even better with you there.”

You can’t possibly ask for more than this. With Nick by your side, you’re sure that you can do everything, even a long haul flight.

taglist: @deathblacksmoke @circle-with-me @sitkowski @ladyveronikawrites @baddestomens

@malice-ov-mercy @chels3a-smile @ferduttini @somebodyels3 @itsafullmoon

@shilohrosechicken @poisongirl616 @mysticdoodlez @agravemisstake @th4t-em0-k1d

@thisbicc @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @mrsnoahsebastian @blackveilomens @sorrowsofsilence

@fadingangelwisp @lma1986 @tosoundlessdarkistare @thisisntablogspost @tintadecirco

@rumoured-whispers @cheyyyyr @mathfairchild1 @thewrstinme @Follow-me-down-to-wonderland

[riddle-on-the-milk-carton]

My ideal x men film adaptation would be kinda low budget and campy looking, I want as many practical effects as possible, there’s a running gag where Wolverine keeps sleeping with people left and right and his clothes always rip sexily, there’s so much gay shit because come on y’all it’s x men, morph looks a wet little snail the way god intended, we get origin episodes focusing on all the individual characters, Charles and Erik never kiss or have sex but what they have so much homoerotic tension it can rival Hannigram

I think what I don’t like about newer avengers films too is that they lack heart and they contain to much action and bland, marketing friendly quips that the characters are flanderized and watered down so hard they make hospital apple juice taste like cheap beer

I’d want to do the opposite of that where we’ll get a cop-out in the first episode, where it’s set up like a regular marvel spin off but then someone drops and f-bomb and gets into a petty argument over who is sleeping with who and it quickly devolves into bickering and tomfoolery, I don’t want it to be edgy or AT ALL like the boys, like the swearing isn’t constant nor is the sexual jokes or violence (that’s what dp is for)

But it is a little more out of pocket and a lot more character focused and campy, I think it should be one with humor and lighter slower moments so you take your guard down while just watching their weird little found family bond

but then serious moments will hit like a character reliving their past or fear of who they are, or the “should mutants REALLY have rights thing” and like i want to go further into things like systematic oppresion and the whole “mutant as an allegory for being queer”

because being in the queer community in my experience at least is a lot like that, it’s full of drama and silly parts, but it’s also scary,

and I’d want some parts goin more into that a a lot deeper than just the regular “magneto was right/wrong” or “mutant —— becomes a villain bc they were oppressed for thei mutant abilities” I’d wanna go into those too just not have them be the main focus

I don’t want Deadpool to take up a lot of space in it but I think he’s be there for gags and background shenanigans, and then he could be a deaux ex machina at some point just standing on a roof handing them something they need before jumping off a 20 foot ledge, he’s always doing weird shit off in the background

[millionsknives]

one of the kids i tutor is this very quiet, strait-laced football-and-cars 8th grader, and he's a little out of my wheelhouse because most of my experience is with k5 kids but i've been tutoring this kid for about four weeks and he was so reserved and stiff and quiet our first meeting i think all he ever said was 'yes ma'am' the entire lesson. and i know he's only here because his parents signed him up for writing lessons but i am so desperately scheming to get him to have fun and take interest and feel like its worth his time, like bro we gon get you something out of these lessons and get some of your personality and interests to show. but i have to be tricky about it. i had to think of something fun and cool disguised as something practical and useful because he's not going to want to engage with any of the silly things we use to motivate the younger kids. so at the end of our first day i asked him if he wanted to start developing a signature. and that was the first spark of interest i ever saw out of him, just the smallest crumbs of life in his eyes, so i've started teaching him cursive off-the-books and when we worked on writing his name today he was very moderately enthused but for him that's basically the equivalent of jumping up and down and it makes me SO happy to see my evil plan working

[katebeckets]

exactly one year ago, I posted this gifset after spending several hours re-learning how to gif. It had been 3.5 years since the last time I had made any gifs. I did it because I saw the tmsource secret santa and wanted to join, but I was super out of practice.

it's a silly anniversary, but one I've been excited for because it means a lot to me. in the last year, I started learning how to gif again, met my nephew, lost my job, joined tmsource (then joined like five other source blogs), got a new job, lost my grandmother, started the new job, had a pretty bad time because of some issues with my meds, figured out the meds, joined some new fandoms, started a source blog, joined some discord servers, left my job, lost an important friend, started applying for jobs, wrote fanfic, and made so many new, amazing friends.

so much of what made the day-to-day of the last year bearable came directly from me getting back into gifmaking. it was a giant snowball of having people take the time to interact with things i made -> encouraging me to talk to people and make friends on this site -> getting curious about group blogs and joining a source blog -> joining many more source blogs -> sending DMs and joining new fandoms -> giving discord another chance -> finding little fandom families and friendships to get me through the day.

thank you for joining me this last year. and a huge shoutout to all the friends and followers from over a year ago who stayed my friends and followers and just take whatever version of this blog you get. i'll always be menzelswift at heart.

and since I was feeling all the things about this anniversary, welcome back katebeckets, i missed you <3

[demigod-shenanigans]

Hi I’m super stuck on the “Nicknames/Wilderness”  prompt for Day 1 of Lost Trio Week, and for various reasons I only have a week to write something. If you could be so kind as to drop a few hcs/thoughts that might get me inspired to write, that would be very much appreciated! (The writer’s block is real)

Laughing a little bit because that’s the prompt I’m also stuck on

I will share headcanons, too, but a general gentle reminder: if it’s too much or you’re not feeling a certain prompt, you can absolutely participate in lost trio week without participating in every single day. Also not sure how you’re doing it, but personally, I’m not writing these in order. I started with Day Four because that was the one I felt most inspired to work on

That being said:

-If we’re talking Wilderness as in Wilderness School, Leo and Piper clicked the moment they met. I’m not sure what it was, exactly—maybe he made a stupid joke and she was the only one that laughed. Maybe she caught him trying to play a prank on someone and wanted in on it. Whatever it was, they’ve been inseparable ever since. It could be interesting to explore some of those memories, or how they looked like with Jason added, or maybe what it would have been like if Jason had actually ended up at the school with them somehow.

-When it comes to Wilderness as more of a general concept, one of the specific silly things my brain just went to was camping trip. Piper has little to no skills when it comes to that stuff. She’s lived in mansions and had private chefs for most of her childhood. The closest she’s ever come to camping has been missions and the time her and her dad camped in the yard of her grandpa’s old home when she was ten, but that wasn’t real camping. Jason has lived in the woods before when he was very little and probably has skills based on that and some stuff he picked up from survival classes in that context, but living with wolves is very different from regular camping and if he’s ever had to apply his theoretical Camp knowledge, he cannot remember it. Leo has the most practical skills when it comes to sleeping outside but he was just kind of making shit up as he went and didn’t really have equipment. —This is all to say they take like an hour failing to set up a tent. Leo has never been more frustrated in his life because he rebuilt a celestial bronze dragon from scratch but is somehow being foiled by a tent instruction manual. Jason keeps bringing up that sleeping under the stars at age three wasn’t that bad. Piper goes from frustrated to laughing hysterically because this being the thing they fail at after every ridiculous impossible task they’ve mastered is objectively hilarious. The whole trip is a disaster for a variety of reasons but I feel like they end up having a great time

-I’m not very good with Nicknames (neither as a prompt nor as a general concept honestly, I’m not really someone who gives people nicknames a lot), but one of the things that comes to mind there could be these changing over the years? Leo and Piper go from strangers to friends and use nicknames for each other for the first time, and it means something, because Leo’s not stuck around another person for long enough to come up with a nickname in years. Jason getting a nickname from Piper and Leo and not really being sure why it feels as strange as it does since he doesn’t have his memories—Reyna doesn’t feel like she’s the type of person to really use nicknames, and since everyone at Camp Jupiter saw him as a leader, I don’t feel like they’d casually call him by some nickname either. Jason hearing that nickname and it being meaningful because for the first time in ages he feels like a kid instead of a leader. Jason getting to use a nickname for Leo and/or Piper for the first time and it feeling significant for the same reason. Jason and Piper post-breakup trying to figure out what to call each other now because they’re objectively better as friends but it’s still weird and new and everything is different and it’s too strange to keep using the same nicknames they did when they were dating.

Hope some of this was helpful!! Please feel free to use however much or little of it as you’d like! Writing this out actually helped me massively because it made me realize I’m a massive idiot and do have a concept I want to use for this prompt (not any of the above ones so again please feel free to grab them if you’d like!) so thank you for that haha

[chrryblsssm]

❝     i'll     keep     that     in     mind     and     make     sure     to     send     you     all     the     puns     i     can     find.     ❞     she     teases,     batting     her     eyes     at     him.     ❝     yeah?     guess     you're     gonna     have     to     tell     me     all     the     baseball     metaphors     we     can     enjoy     together.     teach     me     a     thing     or     two.     i     bet     you're     a     good     teacher.     ❞     she     can't     remember     the     last     time     she'd     flirted     like     this     with     someone,     but     it     felt     so     nice.     ❝     and,     actually,     if     you     wanted     to     ditch     that     antiquated     waiting     three     days     before     you     call     a     girl     practice,     you     could     call     me     tonight     and     we     could     plan     to     get     together...     ❞

❝     yeah,     that     is     pretty     weird.     yours     is     a     lot     more     accurate     than     mine     is.     usually     people     are     just     updating     social     media     about     where     they     saw     me     or     they     know     i'm     filming     on     location     somewhere.     your     entire     schedule     is     out     there     for     anyone     to     see.     ❞     she     shakes     her     head,     a     little     baffled     by     what     a     sports     schedule     actually     means     for     the     players.     ❝     it     kinda     sucks     to     have     to     be     at     that     level     of     professionalism     and     even     your     social     media     accounts     have     to     be     presentable     and     polished.     sometimes     i     miss     silly     usernames     and     posting     stupid     memes.     ❞     she     giggles,     nose     scrunching     up     in     delight     s     she     looks     up     at     him.     ❝     i     mean...     i'm     not     opposed     to     the     dungeon     as     long     as     you're     there.     ❞     she     tells     him,     shrugging     her     shoulders.     she     was     almost     sure     she'd     follow     him     wherever     he     led     her     right     now     as     long     as     it     meant     they     were     still     together.     she     sighs,     nodding     her     head     in     agreement     with     him.     she     still     wasn't     ready     to     part,     but     she     knew     she     had     to     get     back.     ❝     yeah...     i'll     text     you,     or     you     can     call     me     tonight...     whatever     you     want.     ❞     or     maybe     she'd     call     him.     she     could     take     the     lead     if     she     needed     to.     she     just     wanted     to     keep     talking,     but     as     she     turns     to     leave     and     go     find     where     she's     supposed     to     be     right     now,     she     can't     help     but     take     another     look     over     her     shoulder     and     give     him     one     last     smile     before     she's     headed     back.

    ❝    it'd be cool if the pun were intended    ❞     he chuckles.    ❝    but i like getting to know we've got stuff in common right off the bat too.    ❞     quinn grins at her, lips curving up in a bit of a smirk admittedly.    ❝    but i also think we could enjoy some other baseball metaphors sometime.    ❞     he's well aware she needs to go, but they're having a good time, and he's grateful she's more than agreeable to seeing each other again.    ❝    well i'd be happy to hang out again, too. i'll tell you about me too.    ❞     

    ❝    i'm definitely planning on keeping you updated as to when i'm around to get together. no googling necessary. but it is pretty weird in a sense- everyone knowing where i am. and if i get injured it's everyone's business.    ❞     he shakes his head, biting his lip at the idea. but then he's very happy to be thinking about a relationship with her, one where he could just be talking to her enough they'd both just- know when they were in the same place.    ❝    yeah- i don't know. i thought it was funny at the time, but- then you've gotta grow up and look like an adult, even if you're 16 and just trying to land a college scholarship.    ❞     said with a laugh. he shrugs at her words though. maybe, maybe not.    ❝    oh your alliteration's great. i'm just starting to wonder if your sole purpose here is for me to show you the dungeon...    ❞     he's clearly teasing, not actually upset with this, as evidenced by the smirk on his face. but he shakes his head, brushing the subject off.    ❝    look- i uh- i'm glad we did this. i'm going to let you go- before we get sucked into another drawn out conversation, but- it was super nice to meet you, mila. i'm looking forward to that text when you're free.    ❞     

[knockoff-fuze-tea-brewery]

first ever traditional drawing in a bit wooooooo

[xxplastic-cubexx]

ok i drew both of them now

[sciderman]

[a-hazbin-spider]

Angel feels a bit silly, telling him what is average outside of work. He’s sure he could find a tale or two- something for him. A brawl, helping Cherri out, fighting a vending machine- actually that last one was a lower moment for him, and the machine still kept his money for a baggie he didn’t get. Best leave that one out. But he really was, oddly enough. Kind of… boring. Not a thought he wanted to have. But one that held a little reality to it anyway.

Angel had every so often pet the hair- swiped it neatly aside, but other than that, he had practically started becoming a cushion for the stag. He’s bony, sure, but there’s a little softness to him, especially with his fur.

Not sure when it’d happened, the near cuddle he started, but he’d accidentally cozied up, a clicky rumble barely audible from his chest, and his cheek just hovering over Alastor’s shoulder, separated by his hand.

“Ah. Fat Nuggets was- I dunno what tha’ intention was but, Nuggs was… Val allowed me to have ‘em. I been raising my baby myself. I’m not sure where from, but I know tha’ poor thing tried to eat my pills pretty quick.” Not that Alastor asked for that much, oops. “Either way, born in a farm or not, glad I got someone so glad t’see me.”

Angel’s cheeks burn a little, but it was true, Fat Nuggets was the unconditional love that he wouldn’t ever take for granted. Might sound odd to others but he would die for that pig. Do whatever he could to keep Fat Nuggets safe and happy.

“Heh. Well. Y’got me there. When I died I guess it wasn’t very old. If’n I remember correct… if it was in… and I died in- yeah… I was bout twenty years old, I think. But I died in 1947. At least I’m pretty sure. Ain’t too far off from me, are ya? You probably died round my time, huh.”

“Right! Hey, no worries Big Guy. I ain’t rushin’ ya. I’m not goin’ nowhere.” That was distasteful he supposed, to make this sound more like a schedule than anything. Not his intention, but, he can see well enough that his questions on his needs in that quick succession could sound immediate. He’d kick himself mentally for that one.

As time progressed, the allowed touch grew more comfortable. Working out knots in Alastor’s shoulders had graduated to caresses and warm comfort over top skin and scarring alike. It wasn’t like he was unfamiliar, hell he’d been adamant to keep up on a ‘flawless’ appearance himself. But, Alastor had seen so much of him now, seen a kind of wound that heals. No doubt he’d spotted his other blemishes too.

However cruel or unfair he might have been on himself in that regard. There’s nothing but kind touch from his fingers over the expanse of his shoulders.

“You want to listen t’me talk about… uh. Okay. I can’t promise it’s interestin’, fair warning. Specially seein’ I been tryina’ go clean.” Almost sounded a bit sheepish, but he was otherwise cooperating.

He isn’t sure when, but somewhere where task turned into tenderness, that secondary set of arms had crept closer and closer to what was now nearly a loose hug, while the rest of touch had all but turned to petting. Even getting familiar enough to occasionally brush back a stray lock of hair. His body close enough to cushion at his back.

“Granted most of my time is spent at work. But I get a lil borin’ sorry t’ say. I get t’ eat more n’ once though, an’ I always use my off time t’ spoil my pig. Nuggets gets walks and if I got tha energy t’ cook I always make ‘em somethin’ special. Otherwise I sew shit together, give my guns regular maintenance, and get to wear comfy clothes. Unless I’m drinkin’ or causin’ a ruckus, I guess I’m turnin’ to a tired ol’ man.” Sounds like he can laugh about that at least.

[hermitcraftx]

just got a dm abt one of my posts and y'all please don't try and show the hermits (or any minecraft youtuber or content creator for that matter) my posts, i'm uncomfortable with it and don't want any of my posts shown to a cc. if they stumble upon it naturally that's unfortunate but i can live with it since i do maintag a lot (something i REALLY need to stop doing tbh i already know i need to make a tagging system just for my blog that wont clog results) but going out of ur way to show a cc is entirely different and something i am not comfortable with.

no hate to the person at all but even if i wasn't a little silly and weird with it sometimes i wouldn't be comfortable with it, i want my blog to be a purely fandom only space with none of the creators involved <3 please respect this

[mellotronmkll]

Wverytime I sit down at a computer to make music I get so scared