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sosickastro · 2 months ago

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Indulgence (Bts x Chubby reader)

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Chapter 2

Poly Bts x Chubby Reader, Soulmate au and Idol au

Summary: Poor broke and isolated mc gets the chance to go to a concert with an old high school friend, with hoping to find their soulmate and see the biggest boy band in the world. A new shocking reality hits her while at the concert.

Chapter Warnings: degrading thoughts, poor writing and grammar, gender confused reader, anxiety, mc being a loner, mentions of weight insecurities, swearing, fat phobia, etc (let me know if I miss anything)

A/N: second chapter omg I actually wrote it in a decent time span, I want to say thank you for the support for the first chapter! I will try my best to keep up with posting chapters, etc, etc, As we all know, Grammarly is my lord and savior, but even they can't fix my awful spelling mistakes, so let me know if anything is wrong or just ignore it for the sake of the story.

word count: 2,034

(Thank you Corinnecousins on Pinterest for this picture)

Perviously on Indulgence:

"Then for the first time in my life, I felt a tug, anxiety filled my stomach as I froze in my tracks, and my heartbeat went through the roof as I looked down at the red thread I usually forget about, it loosened. Holy shit I am near my soulmate. Holy shit. Lauren notices that I stop walking and now staring at my pinky finger asks me “Are you okay?” I initially looked around the bus station, there were a lot of people walking around, too many to see where the string goes. “Is it your soulmate?” Lauren asks me again. I couldn't speak, my mouth dry as I gave her a shaky nod. But unfortunately just as it loosens it quickly tightens again, meaning my soulmate either left or is on a bus going further away from me. “I wonder if he felt it” I questioned out loud, looking at Lauren with shaken eyes. She sighs, almost equally disappointed “Come on Clare is waiting for us, we don’t want to keep her waiting.” Lauren tells me, grabbing my hand and basically dragging me to the exit. I can’t stop staring at my red thread, there's hope. There is always hope. Now I at least can find comfort that he is in the States, and not in Korea or Russia or anything far away. "

We make it to Clare’s car, she smiles at me as this is our first time meeting. I put on a smile as I tried to push through all the emotions I was feeling at the moment. But it is more complicated than I’d like to admit. The man I moved halfway across the country for is now somewhere in the city that’s only 3 hours away from my 4-year hellscape of a college.

I let out a deep sigh as I looked over to Lauren and Clare, who were having a quiet conversation themselves. Clare nodded at something Lauren said, a look of concern and slight confusion filled her eyes, and spread across her face. “I’m fine yall— let’s get going before I hear another kid scream their head off,” I tell them with a slight chuckle, hoping that I’m schooling my face well enough to at least look like I’m fine as well as my typical dry humar distractes them from the imdending breakdown I am bout to face in tminus 10 seconds.

Lauren eyes me up and down while also looking deep into my very soul to see if I’m lying to her. Clare shrugs, “I agree.” Lauren seems to give up her soul searching and nods her head. In silence that was not completely awkward, we got into Clare’s small car. I shove my bag and myself into the back seat, hoping that the fabric of the cheap seats swallows me whole.

After 30 minutes of awful pop music from the local radio station, – Clare saying something about “keeping up with the latest music” – Clare’s occasional road rage and cars honking, we reach a small street lined with small shops and other downtown “hippie” and “local” boutiques. As God was on our side we found a decent parking spot with little to no casualties, though I was pretending not to feel the curb that Clare drove on top of.

As the other two girls make their way to one of the many shops we will visit, I try to find it in my very core to move and get out of this stupid, beat-up car, but my every soul has died and been replaced with a mopey version of myself. I keep asking myself, “Would I ever have that chance again? To be that close to him?” The feeling of hopelessness seems to seep into my bones and takes over into my soul as I feel myself falling deeper and deeper into the pit of despair. A gust of wind hits my arm, making me shoot up in shock I yell at Clare as she laughs at me hanging off the open car door. “Come on, man, Lauren is dying to check out this new shop.” I rolled my eyes and finally found the courage to step out of the car; the car isn’t stupid, just my feelings.

I breathe in the cold air as I match my footing with Clare, following her mindlessly as we catch up with Lauren, who is currently star-struck over this shirt. “Guys, what! Look at it!” Lauren practically screams at us, I laugh at her as I feel myself letting go of its tight grip on the soul-crushing reality. Maybe spending some money and indulging in giving the greedy company my mind, body, and soul is what I need at the moment.

The rest of the afternoon is spent with Lauren dragging Clare and me around the street, jumping and hopping from one store to another. I found a few tops that were cute and appropriate for the concert but as for pants my fear was proving to be true as none of the shops had my size, or like any normal sizing I mean come on even the chubby girls like to overconsume, and spend all their money on a pair of jeans.

“Isn't this so cute!” Lauren yells into my ear as I lazily glance over the rack of tops. I throw on a smile as I examine the clothes “Oh yeah, it fits you.” She smiles back at me before her eyes start analyzing the shirt once again. “I’m going to ask Clare what she thinks,” before I can respond Lauren already walked away from me. I sighed but smiled nonetheless, as I went back to looking at the mildly ugly and small tops in front of me,

“You shouldn’t be here,” a small but pitchy voice says to me. I turn my attention to the owner of the offending voice, only to see a short girl who looks like she would be blown away by a strong gust of wind. I swear to all that is holy, if this goes in the direction I think it is, I’m gonna hole myself up in my room for the next decade. “Excuse me?” I ask the lady, confusion dances across my face as I tilt my head down at her to get a better look, black jeans, black top, and oh- look! A name tag, great, she works here.

“I’m saying,” her pitchy voice raises a notch as she scoffs at me. “You don’t belong here, none of these sizes will fit you.” She gives me a once-over before crossing her arms and staring up at my face. Yup this went exactly how I was expecting it to. Look, I’m not a Karen or anything of the sort, so the following things I say don’t represent me at all. My eyebrow raised in amusement at her sheer audacity, but two can play this stupid game.

“Oh, really now? I’m sure your manager or other coworkers would love to hear that you're being rude to a customer just based on their weight.” I give her a fake pout. Her eyes widen at my words, “I’m sure this establishment prides itself on being fat-phobic to their customers, so maybe you will finally get some recognition. Oh! And this interaction will make you get that pay raise you have been hoping for!” I fake excitement in my voice, but I am channeling all the sarcasm I have collected over the 19 years of my life.

She starts to stutter as her eyes are wide as dinner plates, her hands come out in front of her, trying to fix her comment she made about me as she fails over and over to come up with something to smooth over her mistake. Another employee walks up to us, “Is everything okay over here?” The employee is an older woman and much more secure with herself. I smile at her, “Actually, no, this employee over here was telling me to leave this establishment because of my weight, and I feel very disrespected,” the said offending short girl’s body regrets itself as she turns to the older woman, trying to explain and justify herself. Again, I am not a Karen of any sort, but I am not going to let myself be disrespected by this Barbie regret just because she is insecure and projecting it onto strangers.

The older woman smiles at me, ignoring her. “I’m very sorry she said that towards you, honey, by no means do her words represent the company and what we stand for. Rest assured, this behavior will be dealt with.” I gave the older employee a polite smile, thanking her as she took the younger girl to the back of the store. Once they left, I let out a deep sigh. Look, just because I handled that well doesn’t mean I wasn’t blowing up on the inside.

I scan my eyes around the store, spotting my two friends over the accessories. Taking another deep breath to steady myself, I make my way over there, I just need to turn off my brain and have fun. I can’t let comments like that get to me. For the next hour, we went to two different stores. I managed to find some pants that make up a complete outfit for the concert. I felt more giddy, as maybe the world isn’t so bad when you have a new outfit to wear and show off. Us three stopped at this small cafe for a late lunch and a breather.

Lauren took the liberty to fill me in on the latest gossip and drama going on in her arts school, as Clare and I just ate peacefully. “Oh hey, what happened back at the bus station?” Clare asks me once Lauren’s gossip train slowed down, I cursed internally, as I was hoping not to think about that again. I shake my head, “It was my soulmate, the string was so tight like he was right there next to me. I was freaked out by it” I explained to her my body shrinking on itself as I reminisced on the feeling of being so close to him. Clare gave me a look of sympathy as she shared some comforting words with me.

“Holy shit-“ Lauren’s voice breaks through my self loathing as the said girl is starting at her phone like it personally offend her, me and Clare exchanged confused looks “What’s wrong?” I ask Lauren carefully, but as soon as I speak, she shoves her phone into my face. I had to squint my eyes to adjust to the screen as I read the headline on a news article

‘BTS THE BIGGEST BOY BAND HAS A 8TH SOULMATE?’

“holy shit?!” I shout out as well as I take Lauren’s phone to read through the article quickly to make sure it wasn’t some clickbait but as I read more of it, statements from Bighit and Namjoon himself explain the situation. I passed over the phone to Clare as I stared in disbelief. Their soul group isn't complete? Does this mean that ‘SoulTies” is wrong, or did they just not know? But these guys are on a world tour right now. How are they just now discovering they have an 8th soulmate?

“Wait, guys, did you read this part?” Clare questions us as she scans her eyes over the phone, “According to the leader of BTS, Kim Namjoon, also known as RM, Him and one other member felt a tug and their red string tightened when at the bus station in the city, where they are performing this Saturday.” Clare finishes reading the segment of the new article.

I think my brain stopped working at that moment. A million thoughts raced into my head all at once, and the main one is “Could I be their soulmate?” but theres no way, there's no way I am the person. Besides, it's nearly impossible as well since we probably were at the bus station at two different times. There was no way two members of BTS where at the bus station and didn't cause a huge commotion. “Do you guys think we were at the station at the same time as them?” Lauren asks us, there is a childlike amusement in her voice, but Clare, thank god, shuts down that thought immediately. “There's no way, we would have seen a bunch of armies going apeshit as well as a million security guards and paparazzi.” I hum in agreement as I finish up eating.

“Well, maybe we should head to your guy's places since it's getting late.” I changed the topic to hopefully not down Laurens' hopes to much. The other two girls agreed as we packed up and paid for our food. We walk down the once busy streets, now its just a few stray people going home like us. When we came into view of Clare's beat-up car, I sighed in relief. Today was fun, a lot of it if I dont think about how much money I just spent, but there is still this nagging feeling in my chest that something is wrong, and that my soulmate is closer to me than I think, and with the article? I dont know what to think at all, I just want to enjoy the concert and leave this stupid city.

I watch as our soulmate gets into the back of her friend's car, and my chest aches as I see the small pout on their face. Soon, you will be with us.

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consolecadet · 4 months ago

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Tips for freshly diagnosed celiac-havers

Someone I knew asked me for advice after getting diagnosed with celiac. I gave her some. I might as well share them with you as well!

I am not a doctor, and not your doctor, I'm just some guy with celiac disease. Ask an actual doctor for help with medical decisions. I'm in the northeastern United States, so you might have to go hunting for equivalent resources if you live elsewhere.

Are you done with testing?

If you had a tTG-IgA blood test with an elevated result, or a doctor just told you you have celiac, but you have not gotten a biopsy via endoscopy to confirm your diagnosis, WAIT! You may not want to stop eating gluten quite yet. You have to be eating gluten for the biopsy test to work.

It is not fun to stop eating gluten, start feeling better, and then have to start eating it again just to prove that you really have celiac disease.

Your choice in this area is personal. If you know you're going to have to wait years to get an endoscopy, it would probably be healthier and more pleasant to stop eating gluten now and then do a "gluten challenge" for a few weeks before your endoscopy.

If it's unlikely you will ever get an endoscopy (too expensive, inaccessible, phobia, etc), there's no point in waiting for something that may never come -- just stop eating gluten now.

But if you can schedule an endoscopy for a month or two from now, it's probably best to keep eating gluten until the endoscopy. Sorry.

Please eat food. Like, enough food.

The most important tip I got early in my diagnosis is that if you stop eating gluten and you start feeling crummy -- dizzy, cranky, tired, etc -- it's not because you're going through "gluten detox" or some shit. It's because you're hungry!

It's easy to accidentally start eating way less when you start eating gluten free. A celiac diagnosis can make you want to avoid eating because food feels scary and stressful. Cutting a major ingredient from your diet without knowing what to replace it with can also leave you undernourished.

You really need nourishment when you are recovering from celiac! Your body need energy from food to use on healing your intestines. If you've lived with celiac for a long time, you probably have vitamin deficiencies you're trying to bounce back from. The emotional difficulty of adjusting to a new diagnosis is also much easier to face if you're not starving.

All of this advice applies equally regardless of body size. Yes, even if you are very fat. If you're hungry, eat.

Where to find information about gluten-free food

The gold standard for basic celiac info is celiac nonprofits. There's a ton of info about celiac disease and the gluten free diet on their websites. I recommend:

Celiac Disease Foundation

Beyond Celiac

You know what's not a legitimate celiac nonprofit? Gluten Free Society. Do not listen to anything GFS or its founder Peter Osborne have to say. Osborne is not an actual doctor, nor is he doing actual nutrition science. He is a chiropractor (i.e. quack) so bad that his state's board of chiropractors threatened to revoke his license. Don't let anyone tell you celiac means you can't have corn!!! Truly, wtf @ this guy.

Google's AI summaries for searches like "Is XYZ food gluten free" are often inaccurate (because they pick up sites like GFS). I always click through to the source to be sure. "Is XYZ food celiac safe" sometimes gives more useful search results.

I also like this presentation "I Have Celiac" for a super in-depth guide to having and living with celiac. The OP made it to show to loved ones to explain their deal, but it's so thorough that I found it helpful for myself when I got my diagnosis.

I want to buy food that's safe for celiac...how do I do that?

You should be able to find gf food at any supermarket. The selection of baked goods and processed foods may be lacking, depending on where you live, but produce, raw unmarinated cuts of meat, and other whole foods like milk and eggs are generally safe even if not labeled gf.

A lot of supermarkets have an indicator on the price labels to help you -- for example, at Stop and Shop, the labels on the shelf have an orange circle that says "gf" in it under foods that are gluten free. It's best to check the packaging too, since Stop and Shop sometimes gets it wrong!

Something that says "gluten free" or "certified gluten free" on it is safe for celiac*. Something that doesn't say "gluten free" on the packaging may also be safe, so long as it also doesn't contain wheat, barley, or rye, or have a wheat allergy warning under the ingredient list. Here are some tips for what to look for on ingredient labels.

Labels can get real complicated real fast, so just use your best judgment. It's okay if you don't get it right 100% of the time. The goal when living with celiac is to reduce gluten exposure as much as possible, not to hermetically seal yourself in a deep well where a single molecule of gluten can never possibly reach your tongue. You, and only you, get to decide how much exposure risk you're comfortable with.

My favorite grocery store post-diagnosis is Wegmans. My nearest one is a bit of a hike, so I don't go that often, but it's such a treat when I do. Wegmans has a huge gluten free aisle with gf staples and fun snacks, plus lots of food items that can be harder to find gf, like fresh pasta and baked goods.

I also like the online health food store iHerb for finding new gf snacks and ingredients. You can filter the whole store by dietary needs, so you can also find gf skincare/makeup items and supplements if you want. I have a discount link for 20% off: https://secure.iherb.com/rewards/rewards-program?rcode=DRO2876

The best way to find restaurants that can accommodate celiac is Find Me Gluten Free. It's essentially a gluten-free Yelp. People use the site/app to review of restaurants for 1) what cross-contact precautions the restaurant takes and 2) crucially, if the food was good!

Gf food can be expensive, ngl. The National Celiac Association has advice for how to save money on gf food, including a database of food pantries that set aside gf food for people who need it.

GF ~influencers~

If you want to follow some people who Get It, I like:

Phil Hates Gluten (on IG, TT, and YT) has EoE (another gluten-related autoimmune condition). He reviews gf food and restaurants and makes silly videos about the gf experience.

Robyn's Gluten-free Living on YouTube has gf baking videos and advice about traveling, eating at restaurants, saving money on gf food, and more.

Here on Tumblr, @gluttonysansgluten and @certifiedceliac (and I would love more recommendations for celiac related Tumblr accounts!)

Having celiac is really hard. But it does get easier.

I felt overwhelmed and honestly kind of doomed when I got my celiac diagnosis. For the first few months I felt like I couldn't trust any food and I was going to be totally excluded at all social events forever. It sucked. But then I got a lot of practice figuring out which foods were safe for me, advocating for myself at restaurants and when my friends were planning get-togethers involving food, and now things are really not that bad. And I feel way, way less sick.

If you feel overwhelmed or don't know how to interpret the 1 million sources online telling you what's gluten free, I really recommend seeing a dietician. Your best bet is a weight-neutral or HAES dietician who mentions celiac somewhere on their website or online profile. You can generally count on those folks to give you practical information about how to live with celiac, as well as emotional support as you adjust to what is probably a pretty big and stressful change in your life and how you view yourself!

You got this!

*Please do not talk about Cheerios on my post. Make your own.

#boring text posts #celiac tag #celiac #celiac disease #long post

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teddy-boar · 10 months ago

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Huskerdust, and general Husk and Angel headcanons that no one asked for (slightly NSFW):

Husk never learned how to cook, while Angel learned from his Nonna and aunties even though 'boys shouldn't be in the kitchen'. He makes amazing Italian food and would teach Husk his family's recipes. They have cute cooking date from time to time.

Angel is ridiculously swooned whenever Husk does any gentlemanly thing for him, like walking closer to the road while they stroll down the sidewalk together, or opening doors for him, or cupping a hand at the edge of the table whenever he ducked down so he wouldn't hit his head. Husk doesn't even realize he's doing it, it's just engrained in him to be protective and considerate towards his loved ones. Angel, on the other hand, has never had anyone treating him with such care before.

Husk used to play the piano in his jazz band way back when, but he stopped after the grief of his child dying consumed him. Now he only touches a piano whenever he's really drunk and depressed, whenever he misses his wife and kids. He shares stories about them with Angel sometimes and Angel comforts him, feeling very honored that Husk is comfortable enough to share such intimate parts of his past with him.

Angel is amazing at baseball. He used to play with the kids on his block, even with his faulty eye, he could bat better than most, and he's a fast runner. It's also coincidentally Husk's favorite sport to watch, so he is more than happy to cheer for Angel as he kicks ass.

Husk teaches Angel how to cheat at card games and Angel picks it up incredibly quickly, deft fingers and all. He is regretting it now as he sits buck ass naked in a game of strip poker while Angel is fully clothed.

Husk's the kind of guy to say he hates pets, but then would be the one to dote on them and spoil them the most. So when Angel forces him to babysit Fat Nuggets, he is reluctant at first, and yet, soon comes to adore the piggy and would protect him with his life.

Husk never learned how to swim. Charlie drags them all to the beach once and the man just sits on the shore, refusing to get close to the water. Angel tries to coax him in to teach him. In the end, they end up with a drenched and very grumpy cat who still has not learned to swim.

(🚨NSFW🚨)They have never finished a single game of pools together, because somehow, with all the egging each other on and teasingly bending over the table and the sexual tension, they always end up fucking on the table. Many 'pot your balls in my hole' jokes have been uttered.

Angel is scared of heights. First time Husk takes him flying, he's freaking out and clutching to the man like a vice. But the freedom and the grandeur from up above are breathtaking and slowly he gets over his phobia through sheer exposure. Plus, he knows Husk will never drop him.

#huskerdust #hazbin hotel husk #angel dust #hazbin hotel #hc #headcanon

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theemissuniverse · 2 years ago

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“DOESN’T MAKE YOU ANY LESS BEAUTIFUL” RAIDEN X CHUBBY!FEM READER

SUMMARY : You’re a princess and younger sister of Kitana and Mileena. Reiko is your ex and threatens you at the banquet. Raiden immediately stops him and gets him to back off. You’re thankful for this and want to thank him the “proper” way. Want to make it clear that I only made Reiko a villain bc I needed a villain for this story. No other purpose what so ever

WARNINGS : MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. fat phobia, fat shaming, abuse, soft!dom, f receiving, dirty talk

A/N : I am on the plus size side so I honestly prefer to make the reader more so on that side

When the Earthrealmers showed up for the tournament, you had your eyes on their champion. He had manners, was very kind and humble. Something about him drew you to him.

It also helped that you witnessed your ex, Reiko, getting beat by the Earthrealmer. You hated him.

Through out your relationship with Reiko, it was an abusive one. He didn’t treat you good in the slightest. You couldn’t tell your mother though because it was a secret relationship. Nobody knew the two of you were together.

He would always hurt you and blame it that you slipped. Then he said his famous line; “It’s amazing how fast accidents can happen.”

After ending things off with Reiko, he became even more aggressive to you. You made it a point to not be alone with him. Until this time.

There wasn’t anyone at the banquet yet. You looked at the pretty flowers that were ready to blossom. When you did, your guard was down.

A rough hand came in contact with your shoulder. You hissed at the pain and turned to face the person. It was none other than Reiko.

“Why weren’t you by my side at the tournament?”

You rolled your eyes slightly and shoved his hand away. “We’re not together anymore, Reiko.”

Reiko seemed to ignore that and continued to ponder on how he could’ve lost to Raiden. “This doesn’t make any sense. How could I lose to that Earthrealm boy?”

“Maybe it’s because you’re a pathetic excuse of a fighter.” You told him. Big mistake.

Reiko grabbed a hold of your throat and started to choke you. You tried to dig your nails into his arm but it didn’t work. He didn’t let up. “Listen, you fat pig. I’m the only one that cares about you. Your sisters are too high and mighty to ever care about you. I’m all you got so get used to it.”

Raiden was there early to help if needed as that was just in his character. What he didn’t expect was to see the kombant that he beat early to grip on your shoulder.

He watched and listened to the conversation. Something in his gut told him that this wasn’t going to be good. That’s when he saw it. Reiko started choking you.

Raiden immediately went to your aid. He grabbed a hold of Reiko’s arm and shocked him with electricity. It made Reiko let go of you and fall to the ground. “Are you alright, princess?”

You gasped for air and held your throat. You rubbed it to try and get the rough sensation off your neck. “I’m fine.”

Reiko stood up from the ground and glared at Raiden. “This doesn’t concern you, Earthrealmer.”

“Actually, it does.” Raiden told him. Now, he was not one for confrontation but he did not play when it came to women’s safety. “So, I suggest you leave. Before I beat you again.”

Reiko had it. He tried to swing at Raiden but Raiden dodged it by going to the opposite side of where the swing was going to connect.

The solider then tried to kick Raiden by his feet but Raiden jumped over it with ease. “Reiko! Stop!” You shouted.

Reiko then tried to do a spin kick but Raiden dodged that as well. That was the last straw for him.

Reiko began to charge at Raiden but Raiden took one step to the right of him, out the way and it made Reiko run into a brick wall. Reiko fell to the ground and groaned in pain.

You were amazed. Raiden beat Reiko without even touching him. “Anger can be a man’s greatest strength and weakness.” Raiden stated simply. He watched as Reiko got up and grumbled before walking away. He then focused his attention on you. “Let me see.”

You allowed Raiden to look at your neck. His left hand held onto your neck while his right felt for any abnormal movement. “Is he always like this to you?”

“Unfortunately, yes. I broke up with him but he won’t let go.”

Raiden looked in your eyes, concerned. “We must tell the Empress.”

You immediately shook your head. “No. If mother finds out I dated him, there will be trouble.”

Raiden didn’t like the fact that you had to keep it a secret but he did just meet you so he didn’t feel it was in his place to tell you any different. At least right now. “Your neck should be fine. Hopefully you won’t have bruising.”

He lets go and you sighed in relief. “Thank you for helping me. You didn’t have to do that.”

“Of course I did, princess.” Raiden noticed that tears welled in your eyes. He absolutely hated to see women cry. Especially women as pretty as you. “Don’t cry, Princess (Y/N).”

You sniffled a little, trying to stop yourself from crying. You had never been shown this much kindness from a man before except from your father but he was dead. “I just don’t understand why I am not worthy of him.” You said, wiping the tears.

Raiden took both your hands, trying to comfort you. “He is a fool, Princess (Y/N). He does not deserve you.”

You bit your lip at the thought. You weren’t looking him in the eyes. “Would you be with someone that…was as chubby?”

Raiden lifted your chin up so you were looking him in the eyes. “If you’re asking if I would ever be with someone like you then the answer is yes. You’re not any less beautiful.”

“Even with all this?” You motioned to your stomach.

Raiden smiled. He placed his hand on your stomach and rubbed it comfortingly. “Even with all that. It’s more to love.”

For the first time, you smiled. Raiden brought his hand to wipe away the last remaining tears that came down your cheeks. “You are so beautiful, Princess (Y/N). Do not let a fool like Reiko tear you down.”

“You can call me, (Y/N) when we’re in private.”

“Okay, (Y/N).”

The two of you heard people start walking in the court. Everyone was starting to come and sit down. Raiden turned his attention back on you. “Sit with me and my friends.”

Your eyes widen at his invitation. You shook your head. “Oh, I don’t want to intrude.”

“None sense. You won’t.” Raiden didn’t take no for an answer. He grabbed your hand softly and made way for you to sit with him and his fellow Earthrealmers.

You sat down next to Raiden. “Hello, Princess (Y/N).” Lord Liu Kang greeted you with a smile.

You smiled back at him. “Hello, Lord Liu Kang.”

“So,” Johnny Cage. “Out of curiosity how old are you?”

Kenshi gave Johnny a look. “Didn’t the first rule your mother taught you was to not ask a woman her age?” Johnny shrugged at this.

You giggled as you thought the Earthrealmers dynamic to be amusing. “I am ten thousand years old.”

Kung Lao spat out his drink and Raiden rolled his eyes at his friend’s dramatics. “Ten thousand years old? Talk about aging gracefully.” Johnny complimented.

You blushed a little at the compliment. “I did not bring her over here for you to painfully flirt with her, Johnny.” Raiden told him.

“Oh. I see why you did.” Johnny shot him a wink.

Raiden gave a confused look at this. “What does that even mean?”

“You know what it means.”

You laughed slightly, understanding what Johnny had meant by that. Your laughter was cut short when you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around to see it was Reiko. This time he didn’t look mad. More so apologetic. And he had flowers. “Can I talk to you in private, Princess?”

Before you could speak, Raiden spoke for you. “You can talk to her right here.” He honestly did not want to cause a scene but he would if he had to.

His friends picked up on this. They didn’t quite understand what was going on but they could put some of the puzzle pieces together. “Right there is fine.” Kung Lao also told him.

They all glared at him like he was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Liu Kang noticed this dynamic but would not intervene. He would only if it came to it.

You watched as you had all the men on your side and it made you feel a lot more safer. You turn back to him. “You can say it right here.”

Reiko was annoyed but tried not to show it. “I’m sorry for how I treated you. You don’t deserve that. You deserve better. Without you, I’m nothing, darling. Would you take me back?”

Raiden scoffed at this half ass apology. He was about to stand up and deal with him again but you placed a hand on his chest to stop him. “It’s okay, Raiden.”

Raiden had prayed you did not fall for his trap but he listened to you. You stood up from the table and wrapped your arms around Reiko’s neck.

Reiko had took it a sign that you were taking him back. Raiden sighed and rubbed his temples. “Are you still my girl?” Reiko asked.

The smile on your face disappeared and was instead placed with hatred. “Let’s both be girls.” You instantly kicked him in his private area, making him groan in pain. The guys all made an “ooh” sound of empathy pain.

You then twisted his right arm did a spin kick, kicking him in the jaw. Reiko fell down.

Raiden’s eyes widen at this. He was glad that you didn’t accept his advances.

While Reiko was on the ground, you grabbed him by the hair and made him look at you. “If you come near me again, I will make you wish you were never alive. Are we clear?” Reiko didn’t speak and you gripped his hair tighter. “Are we clear?”

“Crystal.” He groaned out.

Sindel had stood up from her throne. She noticed the commotion. “(Y/N), my dear. Is everything all right?”

You put on your best acting voice on. “Yes, mother. Reiko just slipped. I’m helping him back up.” You then let go of his hair and held out your hand to help him up.

Reiko hesitantly took it and you brought him at his feet. “Wow, Reiko. You should be more careful. It’s amazing how fast accidents can happen.”

He grumbled some before going back to his seat. You sat gracefully back at the table as if nothing happened.

“A princess that can kick ass? Definitely my type.” Johnny Cage said to you.

Raiden rolled his eyes at his advances. “Well you’re definitely not hers.”

He was right. Raiden was and you would show him tonight.

Raiden was honestly a little bit nervous for the tournament. He still had to defeat very skilled warriors and there was this string of doubt within him.

He decided that it was time for bed so he bid his friends farewell before entering his room that he would be staying in for the time being.

When he did, he noticed a note was placed on the desk. Curious, he picked the note up and read it.

Dear Raiden,

You have been most kind to me. Your gentle nature calms me. Come to my room so we can talk. It the one on the far right next to the fountain. Don’t knock. Just walk straight in and lock the door behind you.

Love, (Y/N)

Suddenly, Raiden wasn’t tired anymore. He smiled a little before placing it down on the desk and walking out the room.

After dinner, Raiden found you to be a delight to be around. You were pretty, intelligent, and humorous. All traits he admired about you. He had to admit that a small crush was forming on him with you but he could never act on it. You were princess. Royalty. He was a farmer.

Those two worlds just didn’t collide.

Raiden did as you instructed him. Though he did feel weird not knocking on the door.

He opened your door and locked it behind him. “(Y/N)?” He called out to you. It was a pretty big room. He thought you had the biggest room in the castle.

He took more steps forward and when he did, he saw you.

You were in only your black bra and underwear with a green robe clinging to your shoulders. Raiden admired your beauty. Then he remembered he was staring at you half naked.

He didn’t want to be rude to you. He immediately placed his hands over his eyes and turned around. “I’m sorry, Princess (Y/N). Did I come at a bad time? Who am I kidding. Of course I did.”

You giggled a little and stood up from the bed. You walked towards him. When you made it to him, you placed your hands on his back and then forced him to turn so he was facing you. “You can open your eyes, silly.”

Trust and believe that Raiden wanted to but he was a gentleman and he did not was to disrespect you by looking at you half naked. “I don’t know-“

You removed his hands from his eyes. His eyes instinctively opened. By the Elder Gods, you were the most beautiful person in the world to him.

Raiden looked at you in awe. The man in him wanted to throw you on the bed and eat you out until you cried. “Princess-“

“(Y/N).” You corrected him.

“Right, (Y/N). Um…why did you want me here?”

You chuckled at his innocence and brought him closer to you. You placed his hands on your ass before wrapping your arms around his neck. “What do you think?”

Raiden wasn’t that naive but this has never happened to him. No, he wasn’t a virgin but a woman has never made the initiative to come at him first. He wasn’t used to this, let alone a princess.

Your lips touched Raiden’s. The two of you kissed slow and sensual.

Raiden’s right hand placed firmly on your waist while the other cupped the left side of your cheek. You sucked the bottom of his lip and Raiden moaned in your mouth.

You pushed Raiden into your dresser. The kiss started to turn more hungry and you started to take the buttons off Raiden’s shirt.

Your lips caught Raiden’s neck and he moaned. You started to suck on his neck and he threw his head back in pleasure.

Then he realized something. “Wait. Wait. Wait.”

You stopped. You looked in Raiden’s eyes nervously. “Did you not like it? Did I not do it right?”

“No, no, no. It was amazing. You’re amazing. It’s just I don’t think we should do this.”

You instantly backed up and became guarded. You fixed the robe so it was now covering your body. “Why?”

Raiden sighed. He took your hands and made sure you were looking in his eyes. “I don’t want you to think because I showed you kindness that now you owe me. (Y/N), you don’t owe me anything. You don’t owe anyone anything.”

He was too sweet. It only made you want to have intimacy more. You walked over to your bed and sat down. “Raiden, I appreciate how caring you are. You’re very sweet but…”

Raiden followed your movements and sat with you on the bed. “What is it? You can tell me.”

You laughed a little. “You promise you won’t call me a strumpet?”

Raiden was a little taken back by the word but smiled none the less. “I would never.”

You sighed a little, looking away from him. “I just want to feel good. Reiko never made me feel good and I just thought maybe with you…”

Raiden understood what you were getting at. He placed his hand over your thigh. “I do not mind to have intimacy with you. I would love to. I just don’t want you to think I forced it upon you.”

“You didn’t. I want this.” You sat on his lap and you kissed him. This time Raiden kissed you back with no hesitancy.

You took his hat and threw it somewhere on the floor. Raiden flipped the two of you so he was on top of you. Then he gave you butterfly kisses on your face, making you giggle. “Stop!”

He smiled sweetly and kissed your lips before kissing the top of your breasts and down to your stomach. He sucked on your stomach lightly and then also gave butterfly kisses there. You giggled again. “Raiden!”

Raiden’s hand went to your underwear and he looked up at you. “Is this okay?” You nodded and he took them off.

Raiden then spread your legs a little. He placed himself in between your legs and started to eat you out. You gasped at the sudden movement of his tongue. You never got this from Reiko.

He licked your folds and swirled his tongue on your clit. You moaned almost too loudly that you had to cover your mouth.

You tasted so sweet to him. He couldn’t get enough of you. If it were possible he’d do this for the rest of his life.

You tugged on his hair a little which he didn’t seem to mind. Raiden continued to suck on your clit with slow but passionate movements.

He didn’t want you to get too overwhelmed so he lifted his head up. Raiden sucked on his fingers and stuck them in your wet pussy.

Raiden watched all your movements to see if you were liking it or not. When he saw you liked the more fast but sensual rhythm, he picked that one:

He leaned down and kissed your lips, making you taste yourself. Raiden then kissed your neck sweetly before sucking on it.

You knew you’d regret in the morning of the hickeys but you couldn’t help it. Raiden’s lips just felt so good on your neck.

“Raiden. Yes. Oh, Raiden.” Raiden felt his dick grow bigger by you moaning and his pants were starting to get uncomfortable to wear.

“You sound so good, princess.” Raiden told you in your ear. “Do I make you feel good?”

“So good. Oh, Raiden.”

Raiden brought your bra down with his open hand and your breasts popped out. Raiden then started to suck on one of them. Him sucking on your nipple felt like fire but the good kind.

You moaned a little louder and your hands were all in his hair. You pushed him further on your breast and he almost had your whole boob in his mouth.

Raiden pulled away and he stopped fingering you. He sucked on his fingers, tasting you. You thought it was the hottest thing ever.

You helped Raiden take off his shirt. You brought him back to your lips and Raiden kissed you with more than lust.

“You are so beautiful.” He kissed your shoulder. “I’m so lucky to have you in this moment.”

You smiled a little at his words. Your hands darted to his pants and you started to help him take them off. Then his underwear. “We can stop if you want.” Raiden told you.

“You think I want you to stop after you ate me out so good?” You questioned him. Raiden chuckled and placed a quick kiss on your lips.

He positioned himself. “Are you ready?” When he saw you nod, he entered you.

You were thankful that he had made you really wet as it didn’t really hurt when he went inside you. “Tell me when you want me to move.” He said.

It didn’t take that long for you to finally adjust to him since he had done a lot of foreplay. “I’m okay.”

Raiden did very slow movements, scared that he would hurt you. He continued to do this until he felt you were used to him.

He went faster but not harder. You moaned at the change of pace. Raiden wasn’t expecting for your pussy to feel this good on his dick. “Oh my. (Y/N). You feel so good.”

You felt on your breasts that were popping out. Raiden watched as your breasts bounced with each movement. Your thick thighs were beautifully made for him. Your stomach also jiggled as he made fast movements in you. It was a beautiful sight to see.

Raiden could not control himself. His hand covered your stomach as it jiggled with each of his movements. He only wondered what your thick ass would look like in doggy style. “Mine.”

When Raiden touched all over you, it made you feel beautiful. It meant more than him saying it. He showed it.

“Oh, Raiden. Please cum in me. I want it all inside of me. Please.”

Raiden picked both of your thick thighs and he wrapped them around his waist so he could grant your request. He would be forced to cum inside of you now.

Raiden honestly was starting to lose his control of his gentleman like personality and the man in him was coming out. He was trying to hold it back. “Tell me how much you want me.”

“I want you so bad, Raiden. I don’t want you to ever stop.”

Raiden could not handle his intrusive thoughts anymore. He wanted you on all fours. “Do you mind if we try something?”

With Raiden? You were down for almost anything. “Yeah, sure.”

Raiden stopped pumping into you. He took himself out. “Get on all fours.”

You honestly did not expect Raiden to be into this but you followed his direction. You turned yourself over so you were on your hands and knees.

Raiden brought your ass towards him and slipped himself back inside of you. With one good thrust, he watched your perfect round ass jiggle and that was all the motivation he needed to keep going.

The new position hurt you only slightly but Raiden still made sure to go slow in you before going all out.

When Raiden thought you were ready, he went faster. He watched as your ass bounced on him over and over again. If Raiden did swear, he would be swearing like a sailor right now.

You moaned at the new speed Raiden was going. “Oh yes. Keep going. Like that.”

Raiden bit his lip. Again, he let his intrusive thoughts win and he slapped your ass lightly. Luckily, you were into that and you moaned at it. “You look so good.” He complimented you. His hands rest on your ass and he watched it continue to jiggle with each thrust. “All mine. I’m the only man that can handle this.”

Another thing you didn’t expect was the amount of talking Raiden did. He didn’t do too much. He would never degrade you or call you names. He just liked to praise you.

“Say it. I’m the only one that can handle your beautiful self.”

Raiden was going harder in you. It felt good that he was going harder but you could barley speak because of it. “I can’t.”

“Yes you can.” Raiden slapped your ass and you moaned. “Say it.”

“You’re the only one that can handle me.”

“Say you’re beautiful.”

“I’m beautiful. Oh my gods. Raiden. You’re hitting my spot.”

You decided to throw your ass back at Raiden and he moaned at this. “Oh my love, I can’t wait to cum inside you.” He told you. He traced over your stretch marks and when he noticed them it turned him on even more.

Raiden started to feel the tightness in his chest. He did not want this to end. Raiden pulled out of you to get the feeling to calm down.

You turned over so you laid on your back and looked at him curiously. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m trying to hold it.”

You giggled. You helped Raiden back inside of you and he moaned being back in contact. “It’s okay. I’m almost there too.”

Raiden kissed you passionately and wrapped your thick thighs around his waist again before going in you at his fast pace.

He licked his fingers and started to play with your clit. You moaned. “Raiden. I need you.”

“I need you too.” Raiden nibbled on your neck softly as he buried himself completely in you.

The pressure of your clit and him pounding into you was all too much. “I can’t.”

“Yes you can. I know you can do it, beautiful.” Raiden rubbed in even harsher circles and he noticed you flinging your head back.

“I’m so close, Raiden. Please let me cum.”

Raiden removed his fingers from your clit and continued with his pace. “Tell me you’re all mine.”

Your fingernails dug into Raiden’s arm but he didn’t seem to care. Tears welled up in your eyes at the immense pleasure you were facing. “I’m yours, Raiden. I’m all yours.”

Raiden gripped your thighs. His pace was getting a little sloppy as he was about to cum too. “Oh, my. You’re too good for me, (Y/N).” His hips rolled slowly against yours.

“Yes, yes, yes.”

Raiden’s grip was tighter. He closed his eyes as he came undone. “Oh I’m cumming. Oh (Y/N). I’m cumming.”

“Give it to me, darling. I want it all inside of me.” You went after him and flung your head back. “Yes, Raiden. I’m cumming too. Please. Yes. Yes.”

Raiden rode both of your orgasms out. He made sure he got every drop of cum in you. He pulled out of you and he saw some cum slipping out of you.

Raiden used his finger and placed the cum back inside of you and you moaned. He placed a sweet kiss on your lips. “Did I make you feel good?”

“Very.” You told him and he chuckled. You brought him to lay down and when he did, you snuggled against him. “We should make this a habit.”

“I would love that, princess.”

#mortal kombat #mortal kombat x reader #liu kang #mortal kombat 1 #kitana #kung lao #mileena #raiden #johnny cage #mk #mk 1 #mk sindel #raiden x reader #mk reiko #kenshi takahashi

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briefinquiries · 2 years ago

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Luke Alvez x Reader: What You Deserve

Description: Feeling undeserving of luke's attention and affection.

Word count: 5.3k

Warnings: low self-esteem, negative self-talk, internalized fat phobia

A/N: I wrote this back when I was super insecure about my weight (i.e. this is how i felt about every guy i dated). but just saying i lowkey hate the insecure plus-sized reader trope and want to write better plus-size reader fics in the future, but this is all i have to repost for now!

You were ten when you sprained your ankle on the playground at school and wound up at the doctor’s office with your mom. The doctor was nice and distracted you from the pain in your ankle with some funny jokes. He even let you listen to your own heartbeat with his stethoscope.

But at the end of the visit, once you had a splint on your ankle, he turned to your mom and mentioned the term overweight.

“She’s on the high end of her age’s weight class,” he said matter-of-factly. And maybe it was just a simple matter of fact. You’d never thought much about your weight before that day. You were happy. You loved to play- especially outside. Your favorite game was capture the flag, but it didn’t matter. You were active and healthy.

Your mom listened to his advice intently, because he was the professional after all. Who was she to question his word on your health? And when you get home you were immediately placed on what she calls a diet.

“That means no more ice cream after dinner, and we’re going to cut back on the popcorn, too.”

And maybe the doctor was right, you started to think, as you took a long look at yourself in the full length mirror behind the bathroom door that very same night. You pinched the skin protruding from your stomach and watched as the fat around your thighs jiggled. Maybe you were too big, too fat. You thought of your friends at school and for the first time, (but certainly not the last), you found yourself wondering, why don’t I look like them?

“The diet will help,” your mom told you reassuringly.

Except it doesn’t. Instead, you wound up gaining more weight, this time at a rapid pace, because you’ve found that when Mom says you can’t have ice cream after dinner, you wind up sneaking into the kitchen after she’s gone to bed and eating it anyway. But you don’t stop there. You eat some of the watermelon that’s left in the fridge, too, and some crackers from the cupboard. Just enough from each box so that she doesn’t notice, but enough altogether, that you go to bed with a full, aching stomach.

This becomes a pretty standard part of your nightly routine until your mom caught you digging through the pantry one night, while she had come downstairs quietly for a glass of water.

The look on her face was shock, followed quickly by disgust. You felt embarrassed and ashamed and humiliated.

“I can’t believe you’ve been doing this,” then, “it’s no wonder you’re gaining all that weight.”

…

You’ve always had a difficult time loving yourself, you’ve always looked in the mirror and not necessarily liked what looked back at you. Sure, there were days where you thought to yourself, I look pretty today. But in the back of your mind there was always that voice that would add, for a fat person.

When you’re in your twenties, you finally break the habitual pattern of binge eating that you’d been doing since you were a kid. As you ticked off the number of days it had been since a binge, you sighed. You really would have thought that by stopping consistently overindulging, you’d lose the weight. But that wasn’t the case. Instead, your body has plateaued. No more dramatic gains or losses- it just is. The weight, for the most part, stayed on.

By your thirties, you’d come to an understanding, a blind acceptance, with your body. You didn’t always like it, but you appreciated it. Neutrality, your therapist had encouraged. And that was good enough.

Regardless, you had other things going for you besides your looks and your weight. You had a great job and infinite career goals to focus on. Not everything had to be about being beautiful and desirable, you learned.

…

Your favorite thing about being part of the BAU were your coworkers. You never expected how close you’d get to them, but before you knew it, they felt more like your family than anything else. Something about constantly facing life-threatening situations with one another created an everlasting bond encased in mutual trust.

You and the rest of the team had a rare evening off, which normally, you’d spend waiting skeptically by your phone, convinced that you’d get called in for a case any minute. But not tonight, Emily had promised. All cases were on hold until the morning. You were sitting at home, contemplating what to do with your precious time when the text came through.

It was Tara messaging the group chat, asking if anyone was up for drinks and a night out. It didn’t take long before Luke’s name came flashing across your screen next. It was impossible to ignore the butterflies fluttering rampantly in your stomach as you read the words that he’s typed.

I’m in, he said simply.

Luke was the newest member to have joined the team. Just months prior, he transferred to the BAU from the Fugitive Task Force. As soon as Emily brought him into the conference room, you knew all bets were off. He was tall and handsome, with a clean cut, thick beard and dark skin. While he was given personalized introductions, you had noticed his bicep flexing as he extended his arm out to shake everyone’s hands. When he was introduced to you, his large hand engulfing yours and his dark eyes scanned the length of you, and you knew instantly that Luke Alvez was a catch.

It was pointless and childish and arbitrary, and you knew it. But you couldn’t shake it, no matter how hard you tried- no matter how many times you told yourself he’d never be into a girl like you. A fat girl like you, the voice in your head said. You tried to challenge that voice- fought back and argued with it occasionally just like your therapist had encouraged, but it still found ways of insisting that you weren’t worthy of attention or affection from someone like Luke.

So, before your insecurities could convince you to decline Tara’s invite that night, you typed back a quick, I’m in, too.

…

It turned out most of the team decided to join your night out. And it was fun, or it would have been, if not for the critic in your head being abnormally loud.

Look how skinny JJ looks in that top- you could never pull that off.

Don’t eat the nachos, they’ll think you’re fat.

Eat the nachos, because if you don’t, they’ll know that you know you’re fat.

As always, it was exhausting and all consuming- a never ending battle in your own mind. And while you knew your team didn’t give a shit if you ate the damn nachos or not, you couldn’t stop obsessing over it.

You tried your best to enjoy yourself- to push those thoughts to the back of your mind, but it took effort.

Tara had picked the spot, it was a small pub that serves drinks and food. There was music, but not so loud that you couldn’t hear each other talk. You sipped your vodka lemonade, the straw pinched between your thumb and pointer finger, and watched as Emily and JJ were taking on Rossi and Matt in a game of pool.

Across from you sat Tara and Spencer. They were having an in depth conversation about Jean Piaget, when suddenly, Luke slid into the empty booth seat beside you. Your senses were instantly overwhelmed momentarily by his cologne, strong but not overpowering. His arm brushed yours, the warmth from his skin sending an electrical current through your entire body. You tensed up, if not just from the shock of it all. But as soon as you let your guard down, the voice in your head crept back in. He can feel how fat your arm is- pull away. So you did.

If he noticed, he didn’t comment. Instead he smiled, his white teeth on full display. “Having fun?” he asked.

You took another sip of your lemonade and nodded. “Yeah, it’s nice to have a night away from..” your voice trailed off as you thought of the word.

“Crime? Murder?” Luke smirked. “Serial killers?”

You chuckled, “How about all of the above?”

Luke nodded. “They say crime never sleeps, but we finally will tonight.” He set his drink down and scratched his beard in contemplation. “I’m thinking at least eight hours tonight.”

“Eight hours?” you gawked, “You’re living large!”

Luke laughed. There was a brief pause in the chatter, and you took another sip of your drink awkwardly. You were about to make a joke about the competitive pool game going on in front of you between Rossi and JJ, when Luke leaned over and said quietly, “You look really nice tonight.”

You faltered, you didn't know how to answer, and you couldn’t even bring yourself to look up at Luke’s gaze, because you weren’t sure you could handle it. And while you knew that you should say thank you, you only curled into yourself as if what Luke said was just a snide, nasty remark. Compliments like that were so foreign to you and you felt like you didn’t deserve them, so you had a hard time believing that what Luke had to say was actually genuine. You knew he wasn��t the type of person to ever poke fun at another, but wasn’t that what made the most sense? He certainly wasn’t hitting on you- so maybe it was a pity remark, or just a way to fill the awkward silence.

You ended up just offering him a curt smile, pretending that you didn’t see the way his face fell.

…

You were happy most of the time. Not as carefree as some on the team, but still. You joked with Tara and Emily and had meaningful conversations with Spencer. You asked Dave about his weekends and listened with intent as Matt told you stories about his infinite amount of kids.

But then there were days where you’re nowhere near that feeling.

There were bad days. And when they came, they were always so sudden and unexpected, it almost took your breath away.

You were away on a case with the team in Colorado Springs when you had your first really bad day in a long time.

The case, for the most part, kept you busy, and for a while you were able to ward off the negative thoughts. Instead of fixating on how worthless you felt, you thought about the four victims that had gone missing in the area, you thought of the Unsub and ways your team could find them. You thought about ME reports and patterns in each abduction, it was enough of a puzzle that you were able to stay occupied.

But when you were back at the hotel, the rest of your team in their own rooms, and left to your own thoughts, that’s when the quiet consumed you.

As a child, you learned that the one thing-the only thing- that helped when you were feeling this overwhelming sense of anxiety and dread, was to binge. It helped you stuff the negative thoughts so deep down within yourself, that for at least a little while, you were numb to all the pain.

You knew you shouldn’t- you hadn’t in so long. But just this one time would be okay, right? Only this once, just to feel a little better, and then you wouldn’t do it again.

The battle inside your own head raged on. You took deep breaths, you tried to journal what you were feeling, but the feeling didn't subside. Only when there was a knock at your door, and you were forced to pull yourself back to reality, did the argument get placed on the backburner. You blinked back tears that you didn’t even realize were there before hastily making your way to the hotel door.

“J-just a minute,” you tried to make your voice sound normal, like the debate going on inside your mind about what you were about to do would be obvious to whoever was at the door. You quickly wiped your cheeks and brushed your wrinkled shirt off before hoisting it open.

“Hi,” you managed to smile as you opened the door.

Luke was on the other side, to your surprise, holding two brown paper bags and a couple of bottled drinks.

“Hey,” Luke answered, his eyes lingering on your face for a brief moment. You wondered if he could tell you’d been crying.

“What’s up?” you drawled, as if to politely ask, why the hell are you knocking at my door at eleven pm?

“Everyone else was asleep and I was hungry-” he held up the bag of what was apparently food and shrugged. “Except, I bought way too much, I’ll never eat it all. Are you hungry?”

You gave him a confused look. “I-”

“It’s just burgers, some chicken and some fries, nothing fancy- but I didn’t want to eat alone and I saw your light on..”

You sighed, but then stepped to the side, a gesture for him to come in. Luke gave you a relieved look before entering your room. He headed to the bed, which was the only place to sit.

“Do you mind?” he asked, motioning towards the mattress.

You shook your head, “No, go for it.”

You closed the door behind him and joined Luke, barely noticing that the dread in your stomach from earlier had been replaced by a light, fluttering sensation.

As Luke began unloading the greasy food from the bag, you hesitated. Was this a trick? Was he secretly trying to see how much food you could put away? Was he going to go back and tell the team how much you’d eaten?

Luke picked up on your apprehension.

“Is everything okay?”

You don’t answer quickly enough before he asked, “What is it? What’s wrong?”

Goddamn these intuitive profilers.

“Nothing,” you said. But somehow, Luke heard the lie.

“I know I’m the new guy,” he said, “and it’s probably gonna take some time before you trust me, I know that. But I want you to know you can talk to me.”

“Yeah.. it-it’s nothing,” you managed to say, because you couldn’t talk. Not about this and not yet. Maybe not ever.

“Okay,” Luke nodded. “Sometimes, it’s tough being the new guy. I can see how close you guys all are and I just want to be a part of that eventually, you know?” His eyes bore into your own and you caught a glimpse of the sincerity behind his words, and that was when you started to feel guilty for ever thinking he was here to make fun of you. Luke was here for a friend, for comfort of his own.

You sat on the bed next to Luke and took a fry from the basket. “You are part of it.” You assured him. “Everyone here adores you.”

Me included, is what you didn’t say.

“You wouldn’t be included in our group chat if we didn’t.”

That made Luke smile, his dimple evident in his cheek.

He stayed in your room for a while, the two of you laughing and talking throughout the night. You never realized how much you didn’t know about Luke. Like that he had a dog, for example, or that he grew up in Arizona and moved around a lot once he joined the military. He kept you laughing, his jokes and sarcasm thrown intermittently through his speech.

You shared the chicken and fries with him, not even feeling self conscious when you reached for more to put on your plate. You were too wrapped up in whatever story Luke was telling and the way his eyes lit up as he talked about the things that interested him, to be insecure.

Luke took the last drink of his bottled water before sighing. “I suppose I should head back to my room, and try to get a little sleep.” He lifted his arm and looked at the watch on his wrist. “I’m definitely not getting my eight hours tonight,” he laughed.

You nodded in agreement, the two of you standing up in sync, and you walked Luke to the door.

Luke stepped into the hallway before turning to face you. “Thanks for the company,” he said.

You smiled, “Thanks for the food.”

There was a brief, awkward silence, where neither one of you knew what to do next. But then, it happened quickly. One minute, you were studying the way Luke’s warm, brown eyes were trained on you, and then, before you could predict what would happen next, he stepped forward, one hand planting itself firmly on your hip and the other cupping your chin. He paused briefly, like he was giving you the chance to pull away. But you didn’t- and so the next thing you knew, Luke was pulling you closer to his body and his lips were pressing against your own, their warmth spreading the entirety of your body.

Fat, fat, fat- your mind suddenly screamed. You suddenly became hyper-aware of his fingers digging into the soft, fleshy part of your hip, and wondered if he’d be repulsed by what he felt. But if he was, he didn’t make it obvious.

There had to be a catch, you thought- some alternative motive for him to be kissing you like this. Guys like Luke didn’t go after girls like you. Fat girls like you, the voice said.

He just wants sex.

He’s not thinking straight.

He’ll regret this tomorrow.

You pulled away, breathlessly, your heart suddenly racing. Before Luke could suspect that something was wrong, you offered him your best smile. “I should get to bed,” you explained.

Luke could sense the shift in your tone, you imagined that he wanted to ask what’s wrong, but you were already stepping away from him. Instead he nodded, trying to hide his confusion. “Okay, yeah. G-goodnight.”

“Night,” you whispered before shutting the door.

…

Luke hoped he hadn’t fucked up.

That was his first thought as soon as he saw the door close in his face. He bit his lips, they still tasted like you, and slowly backed away.

His feet drummed against the cheap carpet floor of the hotel as he paced the few doors down to his own room.

He really thought you’d liked him- thought you’d reciprocated the kiss even. But judging by the look on your face when you closed the door, he thought that he might be terribly mistaken.

He didn’t get his eight hours of sleep.

In fact, he barely got any. Instead, he spent the night trying to figure out where the hell he could have gotten things so wrong.

When Luke’s phone started buzzing loudly, he felt exhausted and not even close to ready for the inevitably long day ahead.

Regardless, Luke got ready quickly. The one conclusion that he had come to after contemplating all night was that he wanted to find you and clear the air. Despite his obvious feelings for you that were now right out in the open, he couldn’t risk your friendship, or making things awkward at work. Once he was showered and dressed, Luke departed the hotel in search of some coffee.

He remembered that you liked it hot, with just cream and a hint of cinnamon. This would be his peace offering, an apology for crossing the line, the promise that it wouldn’t happen again.

…

You were answering a text from Emily on your phone, directing you to go to the ME office, when you heard a voice calling your name.

Your head snapped up, and there, sure enough, like he was waiting for you in the lobby, Luke came jogging over. In his outstretched arm was a cup of coffee.

“Hey.”

For a moment, you wondered if maybe Luke really was into you. A kiss one night and coffee the next morning? Surely that meant he wasn’t just looking for a hookup, right?

You accepted his offering with a smile. “What’s this?” you asked dumbfoundedly. Could you really be this lucky? Could he actually be interested in you? The butterflies in your stomach started flying rampantly as you quickly got your hopes up.

“I wanted to apologize-” he said, his head falling, like he was ashamed. “For last night.”

Your heart sank.

“I crossed the line, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. Your friendship means a lot to me-”

And there it was. You were no stranger to the friendship line. Guys used it all the time as a way out. After going on dates, after hookups- it was always the same response from them when they weren’t interested- I like you but I don’t want to risk our friendship. I really just want to be friends. I’m not ready for a relationship, can we just be friends?

To you that translated as, you’re not good enough for me.

You were a fool for ever getting your hopes up- for ever thinking that someone like Luke could actually be interested in someone like you.

You took the coffee and tried not to meet his eager gaze.

“Don’t worry about it,” is all you could manage to croak out.

Luke could sense the shift in your tone. “I really am sorry,” he said.

But you shook your head, and feigned your best smile. You backed away from him, not wanting him to see the glistening tears evident in your eyes.

Stupid, stupid, stupid, your mind was screaming at you. “It’s fine,” you said instead, your voice cracking slightly just as you turned to leave the hotel lobby.

…

Luke knew he had fucked up.

The peace offering that he had made was nothing short of a disaster, and now he’d have to come up with another way to make up for what he’d done.

That much was obvious as he was left standing alone in the hotel lobby, gazing at the doors you’d just walked out of.

...

Three days later, on the jet ride home, Luke could barely get you to even look at him. Not that he had made much of an effort, but still. He wanted to give you space. Hadn’t he done enough damage already?

He knew he’d have to think of a way to talk to you about what had happened. Maybe if he just explained himself, you’d understand.

But how was he supposed to talk to you when you wouldn’t even look at him?

He finally got his chance when the jet landed and the team was back at the BAU. He found you at your desk, hunched over a stack of paperwork. Rossi, JJ, Tara, and Spencer had already left for the night. Matt was gathering his belongings from his desk and heading out the door, meanwhile Emily was barricaded in her office with the door shut. If Luke was ever going to get a minute alone with you- it was now.

He shuffled cautiously over towards your desk. You gave him no indication that you’d heard him at all, but nonetheless, he cleared his throat before getting too close. He didn’t want to startle you.

You didn’t even look up from what you’re writing.

“Hey,” he said. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

“I can’t right now,” your tone is flat.“I have this whole stack I need to do before tomorrow.”

Luke felt frustrated and dismissed, but he bit his tongue. Instead of pushing, he grabbed half the stack of paperwork from atop your desk and took it back to his own desk. Before you could protest or argue, he sat down and flipped open the first file, ready to work.

…

The entire floor was eerily quiet. Besides the occasional clicking of keys and scratching of a pen, you and Luke worked in complete silence.

You felt bad. You really didn’t have to finish all of this paperwork by tomorrow. That was just your excuse to avoid talking with Luke. But now, it was almost 1 AM and you were nearly finished with it all.

You heard his pen click and you knew that was his indicator that he was done with his stack. Your heart clenched in your chest anxiously. You heard him approach your desk. There was a sudden thump when he threw the stack back where he found it.

“There,” he announces. “Can we talk now?”

The man was persistent.

You set your pen down lightly and sighed. Admitting defeat, you nodded.

Luke pulled Spencer’s chair out from his desk, which was right next to yours. He scooted it closer to you.

Your gaze remained hyper focused on your hands, which were cupped and laid neatly in your lap. Luke ducked his head down, trying to catch your eyes. Begrudgingly, you looked up and made eye contact with him.

“Listen,” his voice was soft, “I am really sorry for kissing you the other night.”

You groaned frustratedly. “Will you stop apologizing?” you finally said. “I get it, you didn’t want to kiss me. It’s fine- But I don’t need this- this pity.”

Luke instantly looked taken aback by your frustration, but it was the most you’ve said to him in the last three days, so he took it all in. As your words played back in his mind, he frowned. “I never said I didn’t want to kiss you.”

“Well- whatever you did or didn’t say, I get it, okay? I get that it was a mistake and it didn’t mean anything. It’s fine.”

But Luke continued shaking his head. “I never said any of that-” he protested.

You remained quiet, but he continued. “I never said any of that. Is that how you feel about it?” he asked, hands clasped tightly together.

You shrugged. Your cheeks felt hot- you were insecure with Luke’s eyes trained so intently on you. You wished you could just forget this whole thing happened, wished you could just disappear. But Luke kept pushing.

“Is that how you feel?” he repeated. There was a brief pause. “Because that’s not how I feel,” he said. “I don’t regret kissing you. I like you and I wanted to do it. And I thought you wanted to, too. If I had known you didn’t- I never would have done it. I regret making you uncomfortable, and I regret making things awkward between us, but I don’t regret the kiss.”

Luke’s words swam around in your head, but they were a jumbled mess. You tried to piece them together slowly, in order to process what he was saying. Did he just say he liked you?

There was a part of you that felt like this whole thing had just been a cruel joke. But yet, here he was- sitting in front of you with the most sincere eyes you’d ever seen, and suddenly, you started to wonder if maybe this was real. Maybe, for God-only-knows what reason, Luke actually had feelings for you- was actually attracted to you.

“You like me?” you asked, your voice low.

Luke laughed- like actually laughed- and when you looked up at him, his eyes were squinting as his lips were curled into a wide grin. “Uh, yeah- I thought I’d made that blatantly clear.”

But you shook your head. “I- I didn’t know..”

“I kissed you-” he said, like it’s obvious.

“I know, but I figured you just wanted to hookup- I didn’t think you actually liked me-”

“But I brought you dinner- and coffee. Did you think I just do that for everyone?”

You remained guarded, because you still couldn’t entirely trust this. “Yeah,” you said. “Kind of, I guess.”

“Okay,” Luke nodded. “Let me spell it out for you then. I like you.” He said each word carefully and slowly. “And I liked kissing you. And I’d really like to date you. And if you don’t feel the same, that’s okay. But I’d still like to be friends, and I’d really like for things not to be awkward at work.”

You stared in awe, not able to believe any of this was really happening. You wanted to ask why. Why did this handsome, kind, honest man like you? What made you even remotely good enough for him?

But you didn’t ask. Because did it matter right now?

“Your turn,” Luke urged. “Since I seem to have such a hard time reading you, can you spell it out for me too?”

You hesitated. You’d never flat out told someone how you felt about them. You were insecure and terrified of rejection. And even though Luke had flat out told you rejection wasn’t a possibility, you were still embarrassed to tell him how you felt. You didn’t like how vulnerable that made you- how open to the hurt that made you.

But Luke’s smile was so reassuring and kind, you tried not to think too much before telling him quietly, “I like you too. I have for a while, actually.”

He chuckled, which you think might just be your new favorite sound. “So why’d you pull away the other night?” he asked longingly. “Why have you been so distant?”

“Because- I didn’t think someone like you would ever be into someone like me.”

The moment the words left your lips, you regretted it. And when Luke’s face contorted into a look of confusion, and then hurt, you regretted it even more.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

You fumble with your words, because you weren’t sure how to explain. “I just thought someone like you would be more apt to go after someone that looked more like Tara or JJ or Emily is all.”

“What’s the common denominator there? Because Tara, JJ, and Emily look nothing alike-”

“You know what I mean,” you protested. “I thought someone like you would be more apt to go for someone-” you paused before saying the word, “someone skinnier than- well... me.”

Luke’s face fell, but you laughed it off nervously. “Just makes me wonder why, is all,” you said.

“I like you-” he assured you. “I like you because you’re smart and you’re thoughtful.”

Luke’s managed to scoot his chair increasingly closer to you without you noticing. When you looked down, you realized that your knees were practically touching. The first thing that ran through your mind is, oh my God, your thighs are bigger than his. But you shook the thought away. You weren’t going to let that voice ruin this- not again.

“You’re intuitive- the best profiler.”

The way Luke was looking at you made everything else melt away. All you saw was him and those unimaginably warm eyes.

“You’re kind and generous and you make me laugh,” he paused. “You’re beautiful.”

You remembered how soft his lips felt against yours when you kissed days ago, and all you wanted was to taste him again.

Thankfully, you didn’t have to wait long for your wish to come true. Luke leaned in, closing the gap between you two. Just when he was only inches from your face, he grinned. “I could keep going, you know?”

You ignored him and his cheeky grin and instead you leaned forward, and without thinking, cupped his face between your hands and pulled him closer.

His lips were exactly as you remembered, soft and smooth and all-encompassing. Luke’s hand landed just above your knee and when you started to wonder whether or not your leg felt fat underneath his touch, you were able to silence it. Who the hell cares? Certainly not Luke, that much you were learning quickly. In fact, you wondered if maybe he even liked it. The thought passed quickly, and you were able to focus on the man in front of you instead- the one who was quickly claiming you as his own. The one you deserved.

#luke alvez imagine #luke alvez #luke alvez x reader #luke alvez x reader fic #luke alvez fic #criminal minds fic #criminal minds x reader #luke alvez x reader fanfic #luke alvez x reader imagine

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quiet-admirer · 2 months ago

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It won't allow replies in the post so I'm sending an anon to support and back the post you made. But basically what I wanted to say was, if you are thin ( you as in the people reading this if you so choose to post it ) then dismantling fatphobia is pretty simple. When your friends say something fat phobic you simply just have to go " oh that's actually not cool. I'm going to leave now. " And then go do something else for a while. It's literally that simple when it comes to friendships. When it comes to other people you simply say " oh that's not cool. I'm going to go now. " And that's pretty much it. You are stigmatizing fatphobia by being like hey this is so uncool that The vibes are now checked and do not pass therefore I am leaving. Eventually people are going to see that they make you uncomfortable and they're either going to choose to surround themselves with other hateful bigots ( which means you didn't need to be friends with them anyway , their true colors would then be showing ) or they're going to realize that what they are doing is harmful and they're going to stop. Because it's their friend and they care about you. Battling fat phobia is setting up boundaries and upholding those boundaries which is okay to do and it's perfectly healthy to do. You are allowed to say that things are uncool or that you do not like them and that you would like to leave the situation.

This goes for pretty much everything mean. If someone is being mean you simply just say that you don't like that, it's lame and stupid, and that you're going to leave now.

If you don't want to give them a huge lecture or sit there and educate them that's fine you simply just set up your boundaries and uphold them. Just because you have anxiety or because you don't have the energy to explain these things doesn't mean that you can't still simply state that they're uncool and you don't want anything to do with bigotry.

Actually, simply stating " hey this is uncool. I am leaving now. " And then leaving is way easier than putting up with fat phobia anyway so like I don't really see any excuse not to set these boundaries and uphold them. You'd be fighting fat phobia in doing so as well and that's a plus.

There's probably a lot of typos here because I'm like dyslexic but whatever, this is all I wanted to add. Fat people are hot as fuck and being fat is cool as fuck I'm fat too and I always speak out against fat phobia as I do any other bigotry even if it doesn't directly affect me. It's called being a decent fucking human being and not allowing hateful talk around you. It's actually extremely easy once you learn how to say hey this is uncool, bye.

Peace out stay fat y'all

Sorry, this turned into an essay but, yeah that's definitely one way to approach it. I would probably use it more with repeat offenders or people I already generally dislike lol because I was whitewomanpilled growing up prefer to question, contradict, or educate first, but it's also good to prefill a variety of ways to respond in your head so you have options to choose from on the fly depending on the situation (or maybe you're not autistic and don't need to scripts ahead of time like I do lmao).

You can also just say stuff like 'that's not funny'/'what's funny about that' in response to a joke, simply say 'that's not true according to the past few decades of scientific research' to spreading medical misinformation, 'what's wrong with X?', 'where did you hear X?', things like that - not getting into a whole one-sided lecture but still connecting with the person.

I think there's just a firehose of misinformation out there reinforced every single day through constant ads, uninformed medical providers, and casual small talk - all with very little challenge, so I think simple, small attempts at education on a collective level can be really valuable in the long run. Remind yourself that you are not going to change anyone's mind in one interaction, but you've planted a single seed anyway. The more people around that are planting single seeds the more you start to think, 'huh, everyone's saying this thing, maybe I should look into it more?'

It's so easy to hop in and contradict fatphobia or diet culture in my experience, and even if you're uncomfortable with confrontation, you can still contradict in a casual or light-hearted way! Just last week I had an exchange that went "he found out he has high cholesterol so maybe we should be eating xyz" "ooh, actually, fun fact: I read a study that showed that changing dietary cholesterol doesn't affect blood cholesterol." I think the other person said something like "well, it can't hurt" but whatever, another seed was planted :)

Also people, ESPECIALLY thin people, need to start being like:

Those "based/waow" memes about getting fat, fat people, etc drive me crazy because just say your 'based' out loud! Just say fucking say it!! And when it comes to things about just like, dating fat people or finding them attractive I don't understand the hesitation to just be open about it. I've been in a relationship with a large fat person for almost my entire adult life and there have been 0 comments or social repercussions or anything. When I've said I prefer bigger people either no one gives a shit or they agree with me...

Same with "my friend were making fun of feedist/fat fetishes so I had to laugh along" no you didn't. You can suck it up and say, "hey, whatever floats your boat," "different strokes I guess," "Idk, I'm not gonna make fun of people's fetishes," "who cares though," "yeah I love weird fetishes, isn't it kind of interesting/cool?"

Another big one is non-fat people declining to be weighed at doctor's appointments unless it's medically necessary, which normalizes decentering weight in medical care more and makes fat people not the only ones resisting that aspect of medical fatphobia.

And a final little one: you can slip into your small talk is pointing out inaccessibility:

"Wow, these salon chairs are kind of narrow, how do bigger people get their hair cut here?"

"What's the weight limit on this tattoo table? I want to recommend a friend but I'm not sure if it could support them."

"I wanted to buy this shirt, but they only go up to size 2X 🙁 Do you think you'll have expanded/inclusive sizes next time?"

"It must suck to get around the tables in here if you're not thin, they're so close together!"

Put fat people's comfort and ability to access spaces into others' minds regularly enough, and they'll start thinking of it too, or maybe even actually make changes to accommodate more sizes! [ETA:] Also make your own space more accessible and verbalize to others how you are doing that if it doesn't put a specific fat person on the spot who doesn't want to be. Like: "my old chairs were so flimsy, only a super skinny person could sit on them comfortably, so I bought these more sturdy ones."

It's great if people are activists or doing visible, larger scale, or more aggressive actions to combat fatphobia, but the little things are extremely valuable as well, and really mandatory imo for non-fat feedists to start pushing back out loud, whether gently or confrontationally. I don't care if you're anxious or uncomfortable with it, like, suck it up and take one for the team. Fat people are anxious and uncomfortable too. You don't have anything to lose as a thin person saying these things and more social capital to get away with saying them. So do it.

#For some reason the phrasing of a thin perspn having a boundary of 'I'm going to walk away if you say fatphobic things' ...#Idk feels like a bit of a cop-out - I think it's better to stay and contradict and educate #But I also get the intent and probable impact of using a freeze-out to stigmatize fatphobic statements #Idk... 🤔#Long post #Excuse my bad meme edits I was too lazy to do it properly on a computer #Kink meta

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jordynbreeloa777 · 1 year ago

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h e l l o!💞 Welcome to My LOA TumBlog!🌷🫧💝💘🌸🎀💓

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ This is a law of assumption tumblog! Where I mainly preach on Neville Goddard, and some of Edward Art teachings! Here is a safe, open, place where all positivity is! :D I also talk about: void, subliminals, robotic affirming, askfirmations, placebo affirmations, lullaby method, some other techniques/methods and SATS. (I don’t really talk about shifting, or reality shifting as much but sometimes I do, if so rarely! | This is because I’m not a shifter<3 | I don’t really talk about states as much because im an a+p girlie! | But mainly to grasp, we talk Everything the Law❤️‍🩹

Some back story: I’m a teenager (yes I’m still in school :), I’m African American + Nigerian 🇳🇬 I love ice spice, Beyoncé, Nikki Minaji, Megan thee stallion, rod wave, Ariana grande music and rap in general (there’s so much more but those are just a few🫧 | Believe it or not, { I’m Christian✝️ } I love the law, being spiritual, and I’m obbsessed with getting what I want and I love helping people with there journey as well as mine. I have been in the subliminal community since 2021 and LOA community since 2023! Also, my asks/dm/inbox/messages are open, vaunting, trauma dumping is allowed! I will try my best to respond, & help the best I can~~

Only thing not tolerated is racism, negativity, hate, homophobia , transphobia, fat phobia, sexism, hate against any religion, things of that nature.💌

here is the place to be where we all get what we want so what are you waiting for..‼️💘

daily post because you NEVER STOP MANIFESTING!~🫧

love you all, also I’m a little new so bare with me🌸

my favorite quote that really changed my view on manifesting is {there is no one to change but self } { all changes come from within } {there is no failure in the law, there is only failure to persist } and { SLAM THE DOOR, if you are already in Barbados, why are you worried about how or when your going to get there? } 🫶🏽

💖 i mainly follow back LOA blogs, but sometimes other blogs that may spark my intrest or attention 💖

_💋 master list coming soon?_ ~💋

CURRENT ACTIVITY/ STATUS: inbox /dms are only open for for moots only, because it’s backed up but my ask is always open ( https://www.tumblr.com/jordynbreeloa777/743685515890573312/my-dms-may-be-turned-off-only-available-for-my?source=share ) Link is there🫦 |

| Where I’m at in my “journey?” https://www.tumblr.com/jordynbreeloa777/739449764118233088/a-little-update-on-my-journey?source=share ! (copy and paste) 💝

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ 🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

#law of assumption #loassumption #manifesation #manifesting #neville goddard #the void state #loa tumblr #new tumblog #new story #i want it i got it #robotic affirming #askfirmations #you decide #you choose #the world is your oyster #keep the faith #keep going #i am state #state akin to sleep

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liaredrose · 10 months ago

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Hello everyone.

I think some of you have noticed I haven’t updated my stories in a while. They are not abandoned, I will finish them. I’ve been a silent reader of Dramione for something like 15 years. Before writing in English I wrote and shared fic in my mother tongue. I have always loved Harry Potter and I have always adored Dramione. It’s just that - and I have to confess I it with a heavy heart - it has become difficult to find joy in writing - and sharing - Dramione. To me writing has always been a way to escape reality and enter the fantasy world that reins in my mind. Well, that world has zero limits. Now whenever I write a Dramione I have to fathom how some people might twist what I write and be personally offended.

It has becoming annoying. I know that some might say: it’s on the internet; brace yourself for criticism. Yeah, you are right but that does not allow people I don’t even know to insult me. I have been told to cure my fat-phobia - I didn’t even know that was a thing - because I wrote Hermione didn’t like Dudley. The fact I wrote she also didn’t like him because he was a moron was apparently irrelevant. Some people were concerned by the fact Hermione believed herself to be a slut for her behaviour so they launched themselves into a campaign to accuse me. Again, the fact she had had a previous sexual relationship that had affected her way of thinking was not relevant. I have been accused of being a racist because in one of my stories Draco decided to go by MUDBLOOD as a muggle rockstar. There is a reason that I haven’t yet explained in the story so I won’t write it here. Besides, comparing muggle au to racism it’s such a ludicrous thought that I am honestly speechless. In a comment someone wrote and I’m quoting here “Careful not to make this into a smut without plot”. I also had to defend a story and waste time I could have been using to write to stop a stupid quarrel.

We don’t know each other, but I’m only patient with my son and with my students. This is a hobby, so I have zero patience here. My heart is broken because I love this fandom. I met wonderful people thanks to Dramione and I will be forever grateful. But enough is enough. I want to reassure my readers that I will finish Crimson Seeds and MUDBLOOD because I love those stories and I want them to have a closure. Then I’m done. I’m writing the next chapters, but - for all the reasons listed before and more - I’m doing it slower than before. I truly hope this fandom will get back to its former glory because it was a fantastic place to be.

I love you all.

Yours,

Lia

P.S. This was just meant to inform my readers so please don’t turn my words in something they are not. Thank you

#dramione #draco malfoy #hermione granger #fanfic #draco x hermione #harry potter #ao3 writer

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starlightiing · 4 months ago

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I didn't want to bring this issue to tumblr because my friends on discord and in my server are probably sick to death of hearing it come from me but the amount of fat phobia that's been circulating around lately, coupled with me already being terrified of meeting an athlete - my favorite athlete - because I'm fat and fat phobia runs so deep and a lot of athletes (not all ofc) still equate fatness to horrible, disgusting "less thans" is really making me super reconsider meeting him in a few days.

I need to stop letting other people's fat phobia ruin shit for me but I just can't.

#fatphobia #tw: body image #tw: fatphobia

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marlasbreastlump · 1 year ago

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more fem fight club thoughts. word of warning i am insane and crazy

- Unlike narrator who would hate it a lot if he got castrated i think a hysterectomy would appeal to fem narrator (doesnt think it would change a lot (Not True) and severe pregnancy phobia) However she wouldn’t actually go through with the surgery because A. she doesnt do anything unless pushed to by an outside force (inertia) and B.

- Penetration Anxiety!!!!! applies to surgery, bullet, PIV sex, literally anything. aversion so strong it extends to Tyler subconsciously. Imo her aversion to penetration is stronger than her wanting to be straight. she would maybe be okay with a bit of cheek hole action though.

- Tyler and marlon dont fuck. because of reasons stated above and to be completely honest because i think it would be gross. but not the fun gross.

- When marlon is ODing on xanax Tyler just burns him with cigarettes and hits him all night until he stops. this makes marlon imprint on her like a baby duck.

- Marlon has hiv :( so probably good he and tyler dont do it

- when fem narrator kills herself she slits her wrists instead of shooting herself because. penetration anxiety!!

- i dont think marlon has a good enough relationship w his parents to be sent bags of liposuctioned fat so unfortunately they just have to go to a medical waste center the first time :((

- marlons the type to say “im gonna kill myself when i turn 30” but he actually tried to follow through with a quarter bottle of xanax and a razor. somehow he survives hooray !!

- Tyler has a veritable fight club harem (ego reasons). narrator is very confused when random space monkeys come up to her to hang off her arms.

- fem narrator’s ikea is kitchenware. she has 8 dutch ovens and still eats spoonfuls of horseradish for dinner.

- she had one of those lowkey eating disorders before tyler fully gestated. she was forced to stop not because tyler cared about her mental well-being but because tyler wanted to get Jacked. Now she eats plain chicken breast and spinach every single day.

- the worst possible ending for narrator would be the premise of fight club 2 (married to marlon and has a kid)

- most controversial marlon to me is bald!! not like mr clean but like Eminem… i need to show off his slightly receding hairline and widows peak… also if he has hair he looks too good he need to look like a golf ball balanced on a bundle of sticks (faggot)

#please tell me your thoughts #cw sui mention #cw ed mention #fight club #tyler durden #narrator fight club #f fight club #soapshipping #marla singer #fem fight club

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anonymoushotsexyperson · 1 year ago

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GROWING UP A FAT GIRL IN THE Y2K ERA

I know peoples attention spans suck so don't worry im adding sections. So you can scroll through and just read whatever intrigues you if you can't commit to the whole thing!!

this post will talk about my experiences growing up as a fat girl and just a little bit about how it effected my relationship to my body as I grew up as well as the struggles of fatness intersecting with racism and ableism as well as very briefly touching on the wojack giving fat girl backshots meme going around!

SECTION 1 THE BEGINNING OF MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY BODY AND HOW FAT PHOBIA EFFECTED IT.

My first experience with fat phobia I remember consciously is around the ages of 6 or 7. My mother and father had recently divorced and I was growing into myself more and more everyday getting stronger, smarter, limbs getting longer, body getting bigger. I was going through growth spurts. I would chub up a little then id grow a few inches, chub, grow, chub grow. Seems like a pretty normal concept or idea to manage right? Well not for the average y2k adult. Everyone would always make comments to my mother or out of fear of being judged for being a bad parent she would bring it up herself. I remember my mothers response to the comments about my body. "she is stress eating because of the divorce!" was always her reply... and giiiiirl no the fuck I wasn't. I was not really that effected by my mom and dads divorce till later on. At that age as long as I was surrounded by most of my family and I had YouTube much else didn't matter to me and kind of went over my head if i'm being real with you. Hey I'm a kid though who knows maybe I was stress eating and just had no idea what to call it at the time and then don't remember but honestly, if my memory is serving me correctly I used to be so confused when she said that! If I was eating a little more it was probably because I was GROWING INTO MY BODY MAYBE?? That was my first run in which followed up with many more, like when my dad made me step on a scale in the living room of his new home strangers -that later became family- walking around, free to stare at whatever the number said. "If you don't lose weight you are coming to live with me." Still echoes through my head, I was about 7. It doesn't stop there I was being called a cow at school, or by my older brothers at home during petty fights we'd have. Some how none of the insults really stuck like that (besides the situation with my dad). They definitely hit me, but if I denied that they did then that counts as dodging them right? Growing up I always thought I wasn't that heavily effected by the raging and rampant fat phobia permeating through the y2k, but in reality it caused me to start neglecting my body all together. Up until the summer between 7th and 8th grade I never looked at myself in the mirror. Maybe a quick glance but I would never fixate on my appearance. Now hyper fixating on your appearance can be unhealthy but so is pretending you don't have one at all which was the type of timing I was on. Fat phobia among other factors was the leading cause of what became a history of neglecting myself.

SECTION 2 DEVELOPING AN EATING DISORDER AS A FAT PERSON

scroll to the next section if you want to avoid triggers!

The effect fat phobia had on me didn't really start to show on the surface until 7th-8th grade. My girlfriend had an eating disorder and she was living with me at the time because her family was homeless (we were closeted as best friends). She didn't encourage my eating disorder but it was kind of a monkey see monkey do kind of thing, she made me start to consider it. At that age range I was looking for different ways to destroy myself as well as connect with my peers and some how those too things strongly intersected as the glamorization of self harm and mental illness was at an all time high. I'm not sure why twelve to thirteen yearly anon wanted to destroy themselves so bad but I think if anything it stemmed from a need for control over my surroundings. At this age my home life wasn't the best. I forgot how, but I think maybe through just looking up depressing quotes in general I found the infamous Ana and Mia. Oh and trust me Cassie Ainsworth from skins did not help AT ALL. CUE THE INFAMOUS GIF:

TW CASSIE AINSWSORTH GIF:

even LOOKING FOR THIS GIF BEGAN TO STIR SOMETHING INSIDE ME OH MY GOD??

The worst part about being a fat girl with an eating disorder is how proud of me everyone was. "Anon you're getting so slim!" "Anon look at you slimming out see I knew it was just baby fat!". My friends knew of my ed so they would never compliment me for it or really talk about my body in general, probably half because of my ed but also half because I was still fat and not considered desirable or something to be jealous of regardless of if I lost a few pounds. But my family complimented my figure a lot as I slimmed and I got less fat jokes and the doctor was happy and people did treat me a little different. JUST a little cuz I was still fat but a noticeable enough change in the way people treated me for me to want to keep going and indulge myself deeper in my unhealthy habits.

But yeah long story short I developed an ed and I thought I was so fat and gross and disgusting and dude I look back at myself and why was my body LICHRALLAY SO T??? I honestly wasn't even morbidly obese or anything (which I am now BECAUSE of my eating disorder but fuck it we ball and also I ENJOY BEING FAT I knowww plot twist right?) also you minors in the ed community YES YOU take NOTE at this next part: I was literally just growing into my body... but then I fucked up my metabolism really bad and completely skewed my relationship with health, dieting, and workout culture so i'm either doing too much or not enough. So not only did my metabolism get utterly destroyed but having to learn how to take care of myself from scratch ended up destroying all the progress made and here I am literally 60 pounds heavier than I was back then and i've dropped weight since i've developed a healthier relationship with my body so if we are keeping it a buck until about a year ago I had accumulated about 100 pounds of weight since my pre ed days because of the effects the eating disorder had on me ! (oh and I have heart problems now not from being fat but from attempting to become skinny the wrong way! if you fast and binge or fast and do cardio and feel your heart beating like that... if you know you know...yeah you're fucking up your heart and need to stop like right now girly!) SO yeah I am a recovering anorexic with some bulimic symptoms. Though even after developing my eating disorder my issues with body image didn't really really affect me until later on.

SECTION 3 THE SOCIALIZATION OF FATNESS/THE INTERSECTIONAL STRUGGLE BETWEEN MY BLACKNESS AND FATNESS/ BECOMING THE DUFF/ WOJACK MEME.

Along side subconsciously neglecting myself I would also publicly portray myself as very tough skinned and overly confident all throughout middle and high school as a defense mechanism when in reality I was pretty indifferent toward myself and extremely sensitive. I think that my tough exterior wasn't only due to me being fat but also being a black woman although I am biracial/light skinned in complexion I feel like I was still hyper masculinized due to my blackness especially growing up in an area where I was closer in proximity to blackness then a large majority of my counterparts. I feel like a lot of my aggression and flamboyancy came from constantly being in a state of self defense and also subconsciously feeling like I had to play the role that was written for me or else I wouldn't be loved or appreciated or wanted. By the role that was written for me i'm talking about Precious, Rasputia, Mercedes Jones, Ivy Wentz, the stereotype of being the fat black women, and for my non black fat baddies for you this would be The DUFF role. This is when you're known as the flamboyant friend with the attitude that everyones scared to make the butt of the joke because she is NOT afraid to snap you in two. The stereotype isn't entirely wrong i'm sure a lot of people fall into it for the same reason as me but then it becomes our main character trait, and that mixed into a juicy cocktail of dehumanization of fat bodies turns you into the friends the skinny girls bring to the club to scare off ugly dudes as if you're a bodyguard and are immune to sexual or physical assault because you're fat!

So I grew up neglecting my body because of fat phobia developed a life altering eating disorder because of how romanticized they were due to fat phobia, and spent my whole life being guys secret crush, or the "annoying dramatic fat girl" because of fat phobia but still even then it didn't seem it had the real detrimental effect on my body image everyone said it would until I was 20. When I was 20 I moved back to my hometown for a little bit where the beauty standard is very much "ambiguous white skinny girl" and I thought that maybe I would get play because hey we are like adults who are deprogramming all that bullshit anyway right? WELLL I did get play, crazy play of course! Just in secret, and I've had guys have secret crushes on me etc but never to the extent I began to face it in my 20's where they would so obviously be horny over me all the time while simultaneously being mad at me for making them horny because I'm fat and it confuses and embarrasses them ( men are genuinely socialized to be suchhhh fucking psychopaths. -if you're a guy and you're reading this don't say that not all men bullshit yes we know not you i'm not gonna specify every time to preserve your ego goddamn). I have some sad and weird stories about that, that involves men thinking they could be more aggressive with me or literally impose violence on me or be extremely weird and creepy because they're embarrassed they're attracted to a fat girl and on top of that a fat black girl that they hyper-masculinized and degraded in their head due to societal pressure/influence... but imma save that for another day or maybe never because I see nothing coming out of me posting that on here but relived trauma. Also the type of man I just described are the same ones reposting this new viral wojack meme by the way:

thats all im saying about that meme, the guys reposting it like fat bitches and are scared that they like us and can't think for themselves thats literally all I wanted to input into the conversation regarding THAT....

also I use the word bitch in an endearing aave way not in a deragotry way so please don't hit me with that "don't call women bitches" thing I don't be doing it a lot but im also not gonna stop using aave and also i'm LICHRALLY AFAB sooooo shut up...

ANYWAYS...The violence I faced at this point in my life really triggered something in me it made me realize that because of the stereotypes held up against me I will never be treated or respected or perceived authentically by the average Joe. The only person that would see me is those who have taken extensive time to deprogram parts of their brain that created these deep routed bias etc. ( also if you're wondering why these biases were created it all leads back to capitalism but THATS for another post..) After facing literal violence cause of my body it definitely caused a blow at my self esteem, but even then I shined on and persevered continuing to be my sexy self.

SECTION 4 FAT PHOBIA AND ABLEISM INTERTWINED.

It wasn't until I randomly got into an accident and became temporarily handicapped while also in the most toxic relationship of my life did I really start to fucking hate myself. For multiple months I couldn't walk, and not only was I physically handicapped but the trauma I was experiencing at that time of my life had left me mentally handicapped as well I simply didn't want to be alive and exist in this body or any body I just didn't want to exist. I had a foot I could hop on but I couldn't carry all my weight on that foot because of my previous issues with my health, (I had already been struggling with a chronic illness that effected my muscles) and i didn't have the strength in my arms for the crutches so I succumbed to my injuries, resulting in weight gain, eventually hip and back issues etc. Then, when my leg healed, the access weight made me feel like I couldn't walk without pain. I was having issues with my health unrelated to my weight since 2020 but I was homeless up until last year and it was also covid so I had no way to really see a doctor and also I was like 18-19 and had no fucking idea how any of that worked and am still figuring out how it works to this DAY. I actually just got my insurance card for the first time this year. YIPPE YIPPE EVERYBODY CLAP. These issues with my health effected my muscles and my bodies ability to absorb the nutrients from the food I ate so this injury was kind of like the icing on top of the cake because my chronic illness made the recovery almost in possible. I would cry a lot, stopped taking pictures of myself, and everything. But even then I knew I didn't really have any interest in being thin I actually really fuck with my warm fluffy voluptuous form, I just didn't want to be unhealthy.

I still haven't fully unpacked the shame I felt around being unhealthy, I was so ashamed despite me trying my best with what I had, and what I knew, and I also still haven't fully unpacked why I feel like I have to specify as I literally just did a few lines earlier that I was 'trying my best', why do visibly disabled folks only deserve care or sympathy when they're actively trying to fit into a world that isn't set up to support or aid them when it very well could be? The intersectional oppression of ableism and fat phobia is still something i'm actively developing my thoughts about.

A thought ive been thinking about a lot is how obesity is a health condition and it can be detrimental to some folks and that saying that it isn't is a reactionary trauma response to fat phobia BUT also a lot of things can be detrimental and the level of detriment different things give you differentiates based on the person. Some people are bigger than me and healthier. Some people are smaller than me and UNhealthier. The detriment fatness has on your health as all things doesn't exist on the linear scale we have created for it. SO although obesity is a disease and proposing that fat doesn't correlate with health in an important way is harmful it is also harmful and plain weird to hyper fixate on obesity. Im also thinking about how obesity is treated this way because it's one of the most visible health issues and how that bleeds into ableism. I'm still working on these thoughts i'm having and how to explain and dissect them in a proper digestible and understandable way. So I think this where I leave you to think on your own about this, what do you think? Please feel free to comment below!

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thedrarrylibrarian · 2 years ago

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Several people have been kind enough to let me publish their thoughts on fandom, community, and queerness to celebrate Pride in the Library. Today's piece comes from @lqtraintracks.

I got into fandom a long, long time ago, way back before I found HP in 2012. My early days in another fandom (days meaning years) are not a time I want to revisit, even though it started out really good. I got to explore my sexuality for the very first time there. I met my first gf there. And those things were beautiful, for sure; they were just short-lived. After a couple of years, I met an abuser, and from then on my fandom life was predetermined by them—what I could and couldn’t read, could and couldn’t write, who I could and couldn’t form friendships with, etc. And even in the midst of that, there were those friendships that bolstered me. @elrhiarhodan, I’m looking at you.

But after 13 ½ years of that… I found HP. And I found a wonderful person who would change my life. I met Shelly / @unmistakablyoatmeal. For the first time in a very long time, I saw someone writing queerly and freely, who, far from being limited to one pairing for life, was writing all kinds of pairings (and threesomes), dynamics, and stories! I was so powerfully drawn to that freedom, and to her, and in no small way, she and this fandom are why I survived, and how I escaped and started to change my life and reclaim it as my own.

I’ve met so many wonderful people here, many of whom have become close friends, my best friends. I’ve been writing all the queer smut my little queer heart has desired for many years now, and it’s been beyond amazing.

But something changed for us a few years ago, and our community hasn’t been the same since. The person who wrote the canon turned on us. She revealed herself to be all kinds of monstrous.

There were clues, of course—the antisemitism inherent in her Goblins, the fat phobia, the queer baiting without any actual rep, the racism and ignorance shown in naming Cho Chang, etc. We knew but maybe we didn’t want to know. And being white and not Jewish, I lived under an umbrella of privilege that meant I didn’t have to see it until other people began pointing these things out to me.

But then the transphobia started. And kept going. And it became her platform. And it got worse, and worse, and fucking worse

As painful and horrific as that has been, it seems to have done what that sort of vile bigotry has always done though: It’s shown us that we are and will always be stronger, wiser, more loving, and ultimately undefeatable. I’ll speak for myself: I wasn’t writing trans characters before. I was afraid I’d get it wrong. JKR’s evil bullshit is what pushed me to get over myself.

This fandom is where I have learned the most about the queer community I love. It’s where I’ve truly learned to write. And it’s where I’ve learned about facets of queer life I’d never connected to properly before out of the fear of trying.

Here’s what I’ve learned: Bloody no one comes together like we do! No one supports one another like we do! We’ve forged a stronger bond because of some terf’s hate, and I feel closer to my fellow queer creators than ever.

This fandom, you beautiful people, have taught me so much, continue to teach me so much. I’m honored to share this space with you. Happy Pride to all you gorgeous people being your trans, nb, fluid, ace, bi, pan, poly, intersex, queer, powerful selves. Thank you from the bottom of my little queer heart. I love you.

Thank you, LQ, for joining me in the Library. I love your declaration of fandom as ours, and the recognition that we are a stronger community because of what we've overcome. Thank you for celebrating Pride in the Library with me.

If you want more @lqtraintracks be sure to check out their work on AO3! I just finished reading her Phoenix in the Fire and I was hooked the whole time! I couldn't stop until I'd devoured the whole thing. I think you'll be just as hooked as I was. I also want to throw in how much I loved A Strapping Young Man - I loved reading about Harry's desire for Draco, and how Harry's desire is bolstered by Draco's confidence.

🏳️‍🌈 Lots of Love and Happy Pride! 🏳️‍🌈

#pride 2023 #pride in the library #pride in the library 2023 #lots of love and happy pride #friends of the library #fandom community #lqtraintracks

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spilltheteawithme · 9 months ago

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Since AW is a fat shamer, herself, I have no qualms about saying this: She should stop messing with her nose and buy herself some tits if she wants to wear swimsuit tops like that. Don’t worry, Belles. I know your fatphobia is, quite literally, a phobia, but you know just as well as I do that those implants wouldn’t be actual fatty tissue like my DDs. They’d be saline or silicone—nice and fake just like the rest of you! No extra body fat in sight!

Message for Annabelle only, no one else! Because you all are gorgeous and so are your ta-ta's in all their varying sizes 😘

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dark-nimbus · 2 years ago

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A Rant on Representation in Media (mostly comics)

CW: ableism, disability erasure, mentions of fat phobia, mentions of fetishization, lmk if there’s anything I missed

I can’t believe that here in 2023 we still have to say this, but fuck it this year has already been hell enough so why not add another thing

Representation, whether it be for disabilities or culture, race or religion, any marginalized group— ALWAYS MATTERS

I spent the majority of the other night dealing with people trying to downplay the impact of Barbara Gordon’s paralysis being retconned. Wanna see how that went?

“Oh, but it’s okay if Barbara Gordon still has some mobility because there’s paralyzed people that regain their ability to walk”

Her spinal cord was completely severed, she was left fully paralyzed from the waist down

“There’s a 60yo fighting in a Kevlar bat suit and shifting clay people, but Barbara getting her legs back again is a problem?”

Okay, can clay people restore a spinal injury? Can Batman punch a nervous system into fully functioning? What relation does that have?

Aside from the fact there’s zero connection between the two, paralysis actually fucking exists. Batman and clay shifters, believe it or not, don’t. Lemme know if you find an irl Batman or Clayface that needs representation. Go on, I’ll wait

“Barbara being able to walk again isn’t disability erasure, there’s other paralyzed characters”

The definition of disability erasure is literally terminating someone’s disability under the belief it makes a person less than. The fuck you mean it’s not?

And how many paralyzed comic characters can you name? I’m willing to bet it doesn’t come to 50. Every character belonging to an underrepresented group matters. Whether their representation is taken away completely with that one character’s erasure or not isn’t the fucking point. You’re still fueling the already negative stigma around disabilities and sweeping disabled people further under the rug

“Her disability erasure doesn’t matter, DC will just paralyze her again in later issues”

I’m sorry, are you completely paralyzed from the waist down? Do you embody each and every paralyzed person and their experiences? No? What makes you think that you get to determine whether the erasure of something you don’t even have matters?

As for DC re-paralyzing Barbara, it’s been retconned since 2011. Even if they do plan on undoing whatever whack job microchip magic they’ve got going, they sure as hell are taking their sweet-ass time

I can’t believe people were actually arguing in favor of Barbara’s disability erasure, but here we are. Representation has always mattered and always will, and yet media loves grossly misrepresenting everything. Barbara was such a strong character as Batgirl, and flourished in her character development even more as Oracle. Her struggles, overcoming them, and learning to love herself and value her abilities beyond the mantle made her a well-loved inspiration for many. To have all of that stripped away and undone with a microchip was just as insulting as it was a destroyed opportunity for character growth

And unfortunately that’s not the first conversation I’ve had regarding the representation of characters

Oh, you thought I was done? Ha! I wish. How about Spiderverse?

“Oh but Sun-Spider can’t be a superhero, she’s wheelchair-bound!”

Professor X. The Chief. Oracle.

And just to cover all my bases: Bucky Barnes, Daredevil, Hawkeye, Doctor Mid-Nite, Hornet, Jericho, Cyborg. And that’s not even going into characters with much more hidden disabilities. Disabilities never stopped anyone from being able to achieve anything, nor should it ever

“Fat spider-people? Really? That’s just unrealistic”

Yes, really. What’s the problem with that? Surely it’s not the webbing, which have been proven to be durable enough to support buildings. No way it’s how they’re shaped when there’s a car, a horse, and a whole ass T-Rex spider variant

Some people really forgot the whole concept behind the first Spiderverse movie. How Stan Lee made it clear that “anyone can wear the mask.” It doesn’t matter your body type, whatever disorders or disabilities you have, your ethnicity or your upbringing. Being a hero is so much more than that, and the diversity of each spider-variant only reinforces how Spider-Man represents everyone

But let’s go even further with voice acting

“So what if Sunspot is being voiced by a white person instead of an Afro-Brazilian voice actor? It’s animated”

Oh wow I wasn’t aware that representation stops at the sound machine. Yes, Sunspot’s newest voice actor is Brazilian, but with a character whose ethnicity plays an integral part in his story, you’d think Marvel would figure casting an Afro-Brazilian VA would be more authentic for the role than the fourth white dude in a row, but no. Of course not

And with each VA they cast, Marvel pushes Afro-Brazilian VAs out of this role they’d intimately understand and be passionate in representing. VAs that Sunspot fans would love to see knowing that their favorite character (or even themselves) would be understood, rather than being hollowly voiced with characteristics that don’t match the person

“If Sunspot should be voiced by an Afro-Brazilian voice actor does that mean Magneto should be voiced by exclusively German Jewish voice actors? It’s not a monolith”

And neither are Brazilians. Hell, neither is any religion or race. That’s why we want an Afro-Brazilian VA. There’s so many nuances that can only be breathed into the character by someone who understands because they themselves have lived that life. It may be small but those nuances are what make the character feel alive to their audience, and the closer a VA is to the experiences of their character, the more genuine the character feels

Portraying animated characters doesn’t fall completely on the writers and artists. Artists may take control visually, and writers may be responsible for plot and voice lines, but it’s the VAs that are in the spotlight. VAs are the ones that gives these characters character. And those characters can’t be fully and properly represented for viewers if it’s not all there

Representation always matters. Its significance doesn’t go away with erasure, and it definitely isn’t less important because other people who aren’t among that marginalized group refuse understand. Disabilities don’t define who someone can be, nor does body type, or culture, or religion or any other background. It doesn’t stop at the sound machine. Anyone who says otherwise are just adding to the ignorance most media uses to excuse the already shit representation of the entertainment industry

Every marginalized group is valid. Every minority deserves to be portrayed as they are and not feel like they’re being fetishized, infantilized, or inaccurately represented for the sake of plot

Little me, the queer adopted Asian kid with raging ADHD, severe anxiety, and shit communication skills deserved more than the fetishization from anime characters and shouldn’t have needed to wait until they discovered Cassandra Cain, the first character to show that superheroes could look like them too

And people that never struggled to find themselves represented in media sure as hell don’t have an excuse to encourage lacking representation and feign ignorance when common decency and basic human empathy is free

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