#just like how Superman isn’t more true than Clark Kent to the man’s identity

[teratocore]

Bruce Wayne and Batman are both the true him it’s just that he often prioritizes Batman and considers Batman to also be a valid an fully formed identity that he calls himself. He can say his name is Batman while under the influence of the lasso of truth or a truth spell because it is true. They are both facets of a fully formed multi faceted person. Batman is his real name. Bruce Wayne is also his real name. You cannot tell me that Bruce’s philanthropy and charity is not just as authentic to his person as Batman’s crime fighting and detective work are just because he plays up certain things while dealing in his public persona, that is something that most public facing people do to some degree.

Bruce Wayne is not the mask and neither is Batman. They are two sides of the same coin.

[wonderjanga]

Solomon Outing Everyone

It’s not Billy’s fault Solomon does this. It’s just that the old man will blabber before he even has a chance to register and now he’ll know people’s identities.

Like the second time he met Batman. The first time the two met was when there was a giant alien invasion. That was the day the Justice League formed. Billy didn’t join though due to the fact he left almost immediately after so he could start clearing rubble and looking for injured. He wasn’t apart of the “Hey, after this, let’s meet up at a certain place and discuss becoming a team” discussion. See, the second time they met, was when Bruce Wayne was in Fawcett scouting for “potential locations to open another branch of Wayne Industries in.” He was actually scouting for Marvel. He wanted to see how the Captain was doing as a hero and if the man would consider joining the Justice League.

Bruce: *walking around, asking about Cap and just looking for the man*

Marvel: *flying in the sky*

Solomon: “Oooh one of your little friends is here, Billy.”

Marvel: *pauses his flight* “Who?”

Solomon: “The Man of Bats. Batman.”

Marvel: “Mr. Batman Sir?” *looks around* “Where?”

Solomon: “Look down. You’ll see a lavishly dressed gentleman.”

Marvel: *looks down* “There’s like five lavishly dressed gentlemen.”

Solomon: “The one everyone’s gawking at.”

Marvel: “Oooooh. That makes sense.” *flies down*

I’m gonna tell you right now, more than ten people have gawked at Bruce when he walked down the street, not because he’s Bruce Wayne, but because they think he’s Patrick Wayne. (Bruce’s grandpa) Let this be connected to my C.C. and Great Grandpa Wayne post from a long while ago.

Marvel: *lands in front of Bruce with a big smile* “Mr. Batman! What’re you doing in Fawcett?”

Bruce: *face shows no reaction but his soul nearly left his body* “Captain Marvel.” *grabs Marvel’s arm and leads them away from public eye*

Marvel: *confused, lets him lead him away*

Bruce: “How did you figure out my identity?”

Solomon: “Easy, they’re body language is the same.”

Marvel: “Your body language is the same.”

Bruce: *someone who carefully crafted a persona to be the complete opposite of the Batman* “Hn. I’d like to you to elaborate on that statement in a few moments, but anyways, the Justice League would like to speak with you-” *starts rambling about the JL and how Marvel should join them*

After the rambling…

Marvel: “I’d love to join!”

Batman: “Really? That’s it? No second thoughts whatsoever?” *wondering how the other man gave this no thought yet also found out his secret identity in a short interaction*

Marvel: “Nope, count me in.”

Batman: “Huh.” *stares for like a second* “Alright then. I’ll reach out to you when we have a comm available for you.”

Then there was Clark. Now see, Marvel had met him first, but Billy had met him second. Mr. Morris introduced them and they worked together for a bit and Billy thought the man was nice. They were even on first name basis! (Clark was practically begging him to stop calling him Mr. Kent.) Then unfortunately, their little partnership ended and they went their separate ways. Solomon couldn’t say anything because Billy was Billy, not Cap, so the chat was muted. Two’s third interaction was when Solomon started running his mouth. This happened soon after he got his comm and went to the Watchtower for the first time.

Marvel: “It’s wonderful to meet you Mr. Superman Sir.” *shaking his hand*

Supes: “You as well, but uh… Please just call me Superman.”

Solomon: “Isn’t that the Kent boy?”

Marvel: *pauses mid handshake to stare intently at Clark because there’s no way that’s true- oh my gods it is* “Clark?”

Supes: *actually shows on his face that his soul also nearly leaves his body* “Wha- I- uh- Clark, who’s that?”

Marvel: “You? Or at least I thought you were.”

Solomon: “Thought he was? Billy you know it’s him.”

Marvel: “Yeah, I thought so. I can’t believe you’re a superhero, man. That’s awesome.”

Supes: *dumbstruck and fumbling for words*

Marvel: “Say, does superheroing help with getting stories-”

Supes: “Okay!” *pushes him into a nearby room so no one will here them*

Marvel: *lets himself be pushed*

Supes: “How did you find out my identity?!” *sounds super panicked*

Solomon: “His body language. And his face. Mostly the body language.”

Marvel: “Mostly your body language.”

Supes: “Wha- We’ve met one time before this!?”

Marvel: “So?”

Supes: “So?!” *pauses to take a deep breath* “Look, just please don’t tell anyone about my secret identity.”

Marvel: “You don’t have to tell me twice. A secret identity is a secret for a reason.”

Supes: *sigh of relief* “Good. But uh… I gotta ask, how exactly do you know my civilian identity? I don’t remember ever meeting you or someone like you.”

Marvel: “You’ve met my civilian identity.” *shrugs*

Supes: “Oh really?” *slightly surprised* “Who are you? Do you work at the Planet?”

Marvel: “No, and I can’t tell you who I am.”

Supes: “Why? You know me… somehow.”

Marvel: “I know, but my identity is kind of a problem.”

Supes: “Are you a criminal or something? Batman told me of a villain who became a hero, if that’s truly the case with you, I won’t judge.”

Marvel: “No, no, no, it’s not that. It’s just that my identity is just a flat out problem. That’s it.”

Supes: “Well that’s really specific.”

Marvel: “Sorry.” *feels bad*

Supes: “Don’t apologize.” *feels bad for making him feel bad* “You shouldn’t have that mentality about your civilian self though.”

Marvel: “I try not to.”

Also any shapeshifters? Solomon clocks it’s them immediately. Also also, him and Cassandra Cain are constantly in tune too. Same with him and Martian Manhunter.

[fictionadventurer]

Second Glance

Or, It seems I’ve written a Superman fanfic

Lois lived for the hustle and bustle of journalism, but she liked the Planet offices best in the early morning, when there was no one around except the janitors. She liked the dim light, the peaceful hush, the chance to gather her thoughts and stake out her territory. Some of the cub reporters said that Lane lived at the office, and Lois encouraged the notion. Other reporters had been here longer, and Perry White ran the place with an iron fist, but let no one doubt that the Daily Planet offices were Lois Lane's natural habitat.

She was only two steps inside before she realized that she wasn't alone. In the middle of the room, lit by the blue glow of a computer screen, Clark Kent was dozing at his desk, forehead against his monitor while his glasses sat beside his keyboard. No telling whether his day was beginning or ending, but it looked like he'd spent the night here. The rumpled shirt and striped tie were the same ones he'd worn yesterday--and she would deck anyone who suggested there was anything significant about her noticing such things. She was a reporter. Noticing details was part of her job.

Lois picked up the glasses and dangled them from her fingers. "Sleeping on the job again, Smallville?"

Kent bolted awake, hands clattering against the keyboard. "Just resting my eyes.”

"You are allowed to go home, you know," she said, a little peeved that he'd intruded upon her morning routine.

"Not when I'm up against deadline," Kent said. "White wants this copy by nine a.m., and judging by his language, I'll have every specter in the Roman Empire after me if I'm late."

He seemed agitated, the lamb, and Lois was moved to give out a rare bit of advice. "Know what your problem is, Kent? You need a backbone. Perry has more respect for people who stand up for themselves.”

Kent shrugged. “I’m not good with conflict.”

It was said that Lois’ sarcasm could dry up rivers. “You don’t say.” How had this paper not eaten him alive? The man didn’t even have the courage to watch a Superman brawl on television. “Only way to get better at anything is to practice.”

“Thanks, but I’d prefer to practice on easier targets.”

“Don’t say I didn’t try to help.” She flipped the glasses around and examined Kent. He looked different without the glasses. Broader. More confident. Nothing like the inexperienced reporter who couldn’t see three feet in front of him without a pair of spectacles.

She peeked at him through the lenses and the truth hit her like a lightning bolt. Her hand flew to her mouth, and she gasped, “Oh. Oh my gosh. You’re...”

Kent sat bolt upright, panic in his eyes. His fingers gripped her hand that held the glasses. “Lois, I can explain...”

Her grin stretched wide. “You’re a hipster!” She yanked her hand out of Kent’s now-limp grasp and looked through the lenses of his glasses, which magnified absolutely nothing. “You don’t need these! You may as well be wearing plastic wrap!” 

Kent had gone red as an International tractor. (You couldn’t hang around this hick for long without picking up farm metaphors). He snatched the glasses from her hand with a speed that surprised her. “I’d prefer you didn’t announce it to the entire city.”

Lois grinned, “Oh, this is front page news. It seems that the entire time I’ve known you, you’ve been wearing these Coke-bottles as a demented fashion statement.”

Oh, he was cute when he was flustered. “That’s not true.”

“Isn’t it? Then enlighten me, Smallville.” She held an imaginary pen and notepad. “For the record, what has motivated you to spend long years wearing these useless hunks of plastic on your face?”

“I really did need glasses once,” he said, fumbling them onto his face. “As a kid. Then my vision improved and I stopped wearing them.”

“So you brought them back for, what, nostalgia?”

He shrugged a shoulder. “I moved to Metropolis, started applying for newspaper jobs, and found out I didn’t fit any hiring manager’s image of an investigative reporter. Even in a suit and tie, I looked like, well, Smallville.”

“The farmboy rube.”

He quirked a self-deprecating smile. “Better suited to throwing hay bales than chasing a lead. I thought the glasses could help me look the part. I got hired at the Planet a week later.”

“You could have given them up. Let everyone assume you got contacts.”

“I didn’t dare at first. Needed to prove I belonged here. And then, well, they became part of the identity. Helped me feel like Clark Kent, investigative reporter.”

“Part of the costume,” Lois said. She curated her wardrobe too carefully not to understand the power of a good image.

“I guess,” he said, with a smile she didn’t quite understand.

“Well, that’s only slightly psychotic,” Lois said. “But I’ve got a good psychiatrist on standby if you ever need an outlet.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. But Lois...” His hand was over hers again. Behind his glasses, those blue eyes were disgustingly earnest. “Please don’t tell anyone about this.”

How did a man who had nearly a foot on her seem so helpless? Refusal would feel like kicking a puppy. She pulled her hand back. “Your secret’s safe with me, Smallville. I’d hate to destroy your carefully crafted image.”

He sighed in relief. “Thank you.”

“And it’s always good to have blackmail material in my back pocket if I ever need a favor.”

He rolled his eyes and smiled as he turned back to his computer. “You’re a heartless monster, Lane.”

“I do try. You should have known it’s impossible to keep secrets from me.”

The smile grew. “Oh, I don’t know. I think I’ve done pretty well so far.”

“Are you telling me Clark Kent has even more dark secrets?”

“You’d be surprised. I’m a man of many mysteries.”

The farm boy in the big city. The man who cringed before his editor and was absolutely fearless in chasing a story. The man who missed every second meeting but was willing to work all night to make a deadline. Every time she looked, it seemed that he was hiding a new layer behind those glasses. Including, it seemed, the secret of those glasses.

“That you are, Kent,” she said, as she strode toward her own desk. She found that she was looking forward to solving them.

[paintball-writes]

Day 3 - Identities

Day1 - Day2 - Day3 - Day4

Marinette had been living with the waynes for over a month now. The reason? Tom and Sabine sent her away to her biological father. Apparently To Dupain was not her biological, but Bruce Wayne was.

Marinette had a sliver of hope, A really, really thin one. Which had faltered by the month.

Marinette had defeated Hawk Moth with Chat Noir. Apparently Plagg found the brooches along with two sleeping kwamis accidentally. At night when Gabriel and Natalie were asleep, He had stolen the miraculous. On the patrol that night, Chat had told her that the miraculous were right under their noses. He gave her the two brooches and told her that Plagg had found the brooches in his father’s study. He told her that Gabriel was Hawk moth and Natalie was Mayura. Then he de-transformed and handed her the ring saying that he wanted to continue his life as a civilian.

Later that week it was announced that Chat noir found out who Hawk Moth was and he had stolen the miraculous at night. He then said that Gabriel and Natalie were the Villians. He then revealed himself saying that he was innocent, and he had no idea that his father was Hawk moth. Marinette had thought that with Hawkmoth gone she could beat Lila, But no, it Backfired. That was the reason she was Shipped off. Like an object. She was replaced just like an object.

Her only wish was to die. But she had tried to do that multiple times. Someone always managed to save her. So no, that option was unavailable. She had thought that she would finally be able to die in Gotham by sucide, But no, Selina, Cassandra or Jason always managed to save her.

By now she had started to see the woman as a mother figure. The Waynes hated her. They didn’t even listen to her side of the story. Only Cass and Jason had seen that there was more to the story. Selina and Alfred too, of course. The waynes saw her with disgust. They laid out certain rules.

And of course she figured out they were Bat family. She may not be from Gotham, but she wasn’t certainly stupid. She had to admit, The Waynes were really good at hiding the Batfam thingy. But what gave them away? Misplaced Batarangs by Tim. Then Tikki had also found the cave. She wasn’t stupid, Clark Kent and Bruce Wayne were good friends and certainly Batman and Superman. The people of Justice league stopped by often at the Manor too.

Speaking of the Justice League, They had given her an offer to join the League, but she declined. They had given her a satellite phone for emergencies to contact the league. They had praised her high and low. Batman was even Concerned for her when he found out her age range. Concerned! If they knew that Ladybug was their new sibling who was claimed to be a bully, she’d be declared a threat and her take Miraculous away.

Her routine was the same. Wake up. Eat breakfast in silence as she was being glared at. Study something. Do commissions while talking to her boyfriend, Luka and the others. Eat Lunch while being glared at. Study the Grimoire with Alfred. Sketch some designs while talking to Selina and Cass. Draw illustrations while Jason talks. Eat dinner in Silence. Stay up till 3 am doing commissions. Sleep.

Last week she had introduced Luka to Cass, Selina, Jason and Alfred. It went really well. Especially when Jason found out he was Jagged Stone’s son.

She was thinking how she could step up her game with the Waynes. In her thoughts she didn’t see Selina coming in.

“What are you thinking about Kitten ?” Selina asks, seeing the half sketched dress.

“Gah! Selina don’t scare me like that! Anyway I was thinking, ``What do I do to annoy the waynes?” Marinette asks the Master of scheming Cat-woman.

“Hmm, what about going to your true self? Being in headphones, ignoring them, Snide answers, and stuff like that?” Selina says thoughtfully.

“Selina, that's brilliant! You’re the best Mom!” Marinette says. She covers her mouth with her hand realizing what she said.

“Aww, Com’ere Kit. I love you.” Selina says softly.

“You’re not mad?” Marinette hesitantly asks.

“Of course not!” She says.

“You’ll be more of a mother than Sabine will ever be to me.” Marinette says with a small voice and hugs the older woman.

Then the Chaos was unleashed. Whenever the Waynes wanted to ask her something she’d ignore them and she always had her headphones on.

- - - - - - - -

“Marinette, tell me why did you hurt the poor girl?” Bruce asks in a stern voice. Of course Mari didn’t hear him because of the blaring music.

“Marinette, Why did you hurt the poor girl?” Bruce asks again, obviously annoyed.

“MARINETTE-” He was cut off from Alfred of course.

“If I may Master Bruce,” he says, earning a nod. He gently taps the girl’s shoulder. Marinette moves her hair away and removes her Airpod. The music is loud enough for everybody to hear.Meanwhile Bruce flushes in embarrassment. “Miss, Your father wants to ask you something.” Marinette nods. She turns to her Father.

“What?” She asks.

“I asked, Why did you hurt the poor girl marinette, around two months ago?” He asks, patience bearing thin.

“Oh? I didn’t know that I could make a clone of myself and Send one to the fencing class and the other to beat her up at the Seine?” She says in a bored tone. Jason and Cass, not being able to hold their laughter any longer, burst out laughing.

Later that night they checked her attendance, sure enough she was in the fencing class.

- - - - - -

One day Marinette got a call from the Justice league, Stating an emergency. She quickly transformed to Ladybug and Portalled to the Watchtower.

“Ladybug, welcome to the Watchtower,” Wonder Woman welcomed, standing at the head of a group of heroes. Interestingly enough, Batman and all of his brood were among them. Nightwing, Red Robin, Black Bat, and Robin and the others.

“Wonder Woman,” she greeted back. “What’s the problem?”

“Your former partner has been kidnapped.”

Ladybug’s face turned pale, but she took a deep breath instead of panicking. “What do we know?”

“Ra’s al Ghul has taken the former Chat Noir in an attempt to convince the Guardian of the Miraculous to turn over the jewels to him,” Batman reported.

Her face turned up into a snarl. “The League of Assassins,” she spat.

They were surprised that she knew Ra’s. But they hid it well.

“I take it you understand why we cannot allow the Miraculous to be surrendered to his control,” Batman continued.

Wonder Woman stepped in before Ladybug could reply. “Ladybug, we need you to tell us who the Guardian is so that we may protect them.”

Ladybug let out a cold laugh. Shivers ran down everyone’s spine. “Wonder Woman, you misunderstand. The Order of the Miraculous is all but dead. I’m all that’s left. You want the Grand Guardian of the Miraculous?” She spread her arms wide. “You’re looking at her. And Ra’s al Ghul can have them over my dead body. ”

The gathered heroes looked stunned. “Now where is Adrien?”

Red robin started, recovering first. “You’re not going alone.”

“You’re right,” Ladybug cut in. “I’m not. I’m gathering my team.”

“What Red Robin meant to say is that Batman and his assembled partners are going with you,” Wonder Woman soothed. “They have experience dealing with Ra’s and would be a great asset.”

“I’ll be back in ten minutes, at the most.” She said. Everyone nodded. She portalled away to gather her team.

Five minutes later a portal opened and stepped out Honey bee, Dragoness and Cobra in the Glory. The portal snapped shut when Ladybug entered.

“This is not enough! We’re dealing with Ra’s al Ghul and the league here!” Ladybug said. “We need her. She’s the last resort if we lose!” Dragoness exclaimed. The Justice league was confused. Who were they talking about?

“You’re right. Bee, you’re the only one who knows where she is. You’re her best friend. I can't find her in all of paris!” Ladybug asks, turning to Honey bee.

“You’re right, I do. It’ll be easy to find her. She’ll be in her room. She’s always Isolated, so don’t worry about getting caught.” Honey Bee answers.

“Isolation! I thought I told her to Socialize!” Ladybug exclaims.

“Yeah, but her family treats her like a pariah except some people. But Ladybug I don’t know if she’ll be able to fight.” Honey bee says.

“Rossi?”

“Rossi.”

“Now location please.” Ladybug says.

“Right. Wayne Manor, Gotham, New Jersey.” Honeybee whispers. Earning surprised looks from Ladybug and the Supers.

“Alright.” Ladybug portals away. This was all staged of course. She had recently found a spell to make a clone of herself.

“Why won't the hero be able to fight? She’s a hero!” Batman exclaims.

“Depression, you overgrown furry, Depression. She’s tried committing sucide several times. We saved her.” This earns many shocked looks.

Cue opening a portal. All of the Paris heroes Gasps. All in glory Multimouse is standing there.

When Honey Bee saw Multimouse, she gasped and enveloped her in a hug, muttering French endearments and saying how much she’d missed her. Dragoness stole Multimouse for a hug next before passing her on to Viperion who also received an extra peck on the lips in return, while Ladybug watched with a soft smile.

With Kaalki involved, it was child’s play to get into the assassin stronghold. Team Miraculous filled the gaps and worked seamlessly in their own right, simply a step away from Gotham’s Bats. They beat assassins on their own. The Bats just watched in awe.

It didn’t take them long to make their way to Ra’s.

The man wore a self-satisfied smirk on his face as he greeted him from his throne. A bruised and bloodied but otherwise intact Adrien was being restrained on the dias a few feet away.

“Well, well, if it isn’t Team Miraculous,” Ra’s mused, looking down the line. His eyes paused on Multimouse and his expression shifted to intense amusement. “And if it isn’t the latest in the Detective’s brood. I suppose heroics truly do run in the family after all.”

A number of shocked and confused gazes snapped to Multimouse, who simply stared at him down with cold eyes growling quietly.

“And yet she isn’t why we’re here,” Ladybug cut in coldly, shoving that problem in a box for later.

Ra’s shifted his oily attention to her. “Yes, I believe I requested the Guardian, young Bug.”

“And here I am,” Ladybug said simply. “But I will never cede the Miraculous to you.”

“Well, then I suppose the Blonde Cat dies.” The assassin near Adrien tried to kill him only to turn to orange smoke. Ra’s growls when he realizes he was tricked.

“Your reign is over. Your crimes won’t continue much longer. Tell me, just how long have you been using the Pits to keep yourself alive?”

“Goodbye, Ra’s al Ghul,” Ladybug intoned. “We’ll leave you to what remains of your empire.” She turned and motioned for the Fox to open the portal to the Watchtower. The Bats followed behind.

Adrien was at the fringes, attempting to escape a hero that was trying to get him to the Medbay for medical attention. He only had eyes for Multimouse.

“Marinette!” he called.

The Bats were shocked at both the name and the blatant outing of a secret identity.

Adrien broke free from his wounds. “Marinette, I’m so sorry,” he said brokenly.

It was quiet for a moment. “I take it they told you why I left, then,” Multimouse said, carefully devoid of emotion.

“I never thought-”

“Don’t, Adrien,” Queen Bee snapped.

Adrien gaped at his friend, shocked at the venom her words carried against him.

“But her Lies, they weren't hurting anyone!”

“How?” Multimouse snapped, her voice cracking. She took a deep breath. “How was it different? Because you told me I had to ‘take the high road?’ Because her lies would unravel themselves? Because she wasn’t hurting anyone? Bullshit, Adrien! They were hurting me!”

“She followed your advice at first,” Queen Bee said sharply. “She shouldn’t have, but you were her friend and she trusted you. By the time she realized that it had been a mistake, it was too late. Everyone else was in too deep and you did nothing . When Mari tried to tell everyone that they were being lied to, she was made to look like a liar. A bully.”

“Do you realize that the rest of us had people on watchlists?” Ryuko said bluntly. “People at risk of Akumatization that could bring the city to its knees. Aurore, because of Stormy Weather II. Ondine, because of Syren. But do you know who was on top?” She let the silence sit. “Marinette. Marinette was on top of that list. The only reason she was above Ladybug was because Marinette was drowning. But any time she tried to get through to the others, Lila hit back harder and you would ask Mari to back down. Because we don’t want to upset Lila, right? We don’t want her to become an akuma. Again.”

“My parents believed her, Adrien,” Multimouse said quietly. “They sent me away because I was ‘out of control’. I’m treated like a criminal where I am now! So I’m sorry, Adrien, but I can’t forgive you. You said you didn’t want to live with more lies, but then you stopped telling the truth when it threatened your ‘peace’. Even when that ‘peace’ might have ruined my life.” She took a deep, steadying breath. “But you know what they say, right? Never meet your heroes.” She turned and looked straight at Batman. “They’ll always just disappoint you.”

- - - - - - - -

The next week was tense at the Wayne manor. But eventually they apologised to marinette. She became close with them. She and her family then sent lawsuits to the Akuma class.

The saying is true then. “All’s well that ends well.”

@maribat-bdbwm

[effervescent7]

Lana, Lex, Clark, and Lionel debate

This is a Lana Clark Lex and Lionel debate

X 6 years ago

"Clark means more to me than you ever will" No Lana the only person who means more to you than anyone is yourself.

LO 6 years ago

STFU REJECT

X 6 years ago

@LO STFU Lana fanboy.

Supernova 2 days ago

That's why Lana did all of that volunteer work for blood drives. Or helped Adam when he pretended to be homeless. Wanted to use Lex's money for halfway houses and immigrant slavery. You know this Lana-hate which THANK GOODNESS is almost over is just out of spite.

[1] Link

X 1 day ago

@Supernova She was the show's worst character. Treated like a perfect saintly Mary Sue who could do no wrong even though she can and had done plenty of wrong. She was a hypocrite who supposedly hated being lied to and having secrets kept from her only to lie and keep secrets herself. Her entire relationship with Clark was her trying to force him to tell her about his powers then having a tantrum when he wouldn't. She got jealous when men she fancied kissed other women even if she was with other men at the time. Even when she was with Whitney she gave Clark and Chloe a jealous look when she saw them kissing. Because Lana apparently believed that men had to pine for her until she was ready for them. Characters who were complete strangers to her would call her amazing out of nowhere even though she wasn't which was just the original producers projecting their obsession with the actress and character. Her and Clark's relationship was lust not love. They only liked each other for their looks and because they wanted to have sex. Anything Lana did wrong was ignored or portrayed as right. Like kidnapping the reformed Lionel and having him held hostage by a crazy woman for forcing her to marry Lex, when she was with Lex she threatened to have the college fund of the daughter of a LuthorCorp employee cut off unless said employee gave her the box from Brainiac's ship, she pretended to set up a clinic to help Kryptonite powered people but instead just used it to spy on Lex, nearly killed Lois while trying to kill Lex. People hate Lana because she's the worst character in the show, never had a clear set in stone character, was played by an actress hired for her looks not her acting ability, in other versions of Superman Lana Lang is just Clark's high school girlfriend. Therefore Lana should have left the show for good when she went to France at the end of Season 3. Instead they kept her around until Season 8. She was one of the most evil characters in the show yet was treated as if she was pure and innocent. At least Smallville's other villains were shown to be what they were.

A 8 hours ago (edited)

Only lust not love? When there were together they often go on normal dates, which they talk about of you listen to the dialogue. Apparently they always either go out to dinner, horse-riding, or dancing. They don't even sleep together for years of being friends. Anyway Clark is the major gaslighter in the show, gaslighting means making someone believe something isn't true even when they know it is. That is all Clark does to Lana and Lex throughout the first 3 seasons every-time someone threatens them about Clark. Lex tries to talk to him after being told by multiple people that Clark has a dangerous secret (like Lana) and just asks Clark outright. "Friendships built on secrets are destined to fail" and Clark says "good thing we don't have that problem". This is actually gaslighting. Making someone believe that something didn't happen, which can actually drive people out of their minds. "There's nothing more to me than what you see" to Lana who actually saw him use his powers "You'd still be the same Clark Kent." Which is what she says every-time she asks about the secret which is really in 3x02, gunpoint 3x03 after being kidnapped over the secret, and 5x10 because he suddenly stopped when they were going to sleep together. Then of course Clark blames her for moving away to college. And wait she actually think she asks about his health, because at this point she went to Lex and told him to stay away from Clark because he's "just like the rest of us". As for secrets in season 4 Lana admits everything which she had already told her current boyfriend and Lex about. She tells Clark after they become friends again. Why tell someone something if you aren't even talking to them? Then we see in 5x10 that Lana brings up aliens and tries to talk about the spaceship with Clark, before it's revealed that she accepted Lex's offer. Because Lex truly thinks aliens are going to invade and take over the world. Once Lex is revealed, you really expect her just to lie back and know that he's doing a ton of messed up stuff and not go after him? Lex is evil, but let him be? Going after an evil person doesn't make someone evil. And oh Lionel- didn't he kill his parents and a ton of innocent people over the years. Didn't he abuse his family? Who cares! But you seem to forget that Lana did save Lois' in Gone and Arrival. As for Lois, Chloe does confront her about that. But no Lana is not evil, she goes through therapy and reformation before returning because of some mental issues from being with Lex. And is your comment is less an accurate view of the show and more a rant.

X 7 hours ago @Ambrosia 777 She was right to go after Lex but didn't care how many innocents she hurt to get to him. And Lionel had redeemed himself after switching bodies with Clark cured him of a liver disease that was killing him and spent the rest of his life protecting Clark until Lex killed him. As bad as Clark's lying and secret keeping was he was doing it to protect people and make it so they didn't get put in danger or killed by his life as a hero.

A 6 hours ago

But she didn't plan to hurt Grant or Lois. Grant only didn't want to expose Lex because he worked for him. Anyway Lana had mental issues, she needed to work through. A fake pregnancy and finding out all of those things she defended Lex from were actually real broke her. But then and I read that blog post, she really did torture. herself because she didn't want to be that kind of person. Anyway the Black Box was supposed to protect the world from an alien invasion, until Lex wanted to start using it to make weapons. Then she disagreed, because she didn't want innocent people to die. Because she's not a Lex copy.

A 6 hours ago

Oh no I'm not a Clark hater at all. But I really hated how he pretended like Lex and Lana were imagining things and all of those people that kept telling them about him were lying. I know Clark is a good guy, but that took a toll on his friendships with them. They tried to prove they would care about him no matter what he was or why all of those things were happening. If a ton of people tried to kill me, then said yow know Clark has a secret. I'd want to know. And it's not like they argued with him about it, they asked directly. Straight to the source. Far better than just ending the relationship because Clark had a secret identity. Until Lex flat out started stalking him and that whole thing in Mortal which I will not excuse.

L 2 days ago (edited)

​ @A  All that truth scarred him off. Adults blindly hating a teenage girl and insulting the actress don't need attention anyway. To think that Lionel spent his entire life killing people and being a wife beater, to earn sudden forgiveness and still treat Lex like crap. While Lex turns into this kind of misguided monster. And Lana spends 1 year doing questionable things to protect the world from aliens or Lex and she's evil! Don't get me started on that teenage crap this grown man commented at first.

L 3 hours ago

And where does this “whining” all the time come from?! She asks twice in season 3 after Clark runs away and doesn't ask again until season 5. Compare that to Chloe seasons 1-3. I think Lana-haters know they just exaggerate and hate the character because they're insecure or immature. Especially when it's a grown man saying these hateful things.

X 3 hours ago

@L  Horrible things Lex and Lionel did were acknowledged as horrible. Horrible things Lana did were either ignored completely or treated as if they were right. Not liking a badly written and acted character isn't insecurity or immaturity. And there are plenty of women who hate the character of Lana as well. You liking her doesn't mean everyone has to.

A 9 minutes ago

You don't have to. Some of the things you said about Kristin and Lana in other comments read that way. And I truly think Lex and Lionel were evil because they had no reason to do those things. But Lana truly believed Lex when he said the Black Box could stop and invasion. And was mentally shook when he was revealed to be a bad guy who does all of these things she thought he wouldn't do, so she went after him. I'm just saying she's not evil or monstrous and ignoring the plot or reasons to hate Lana is unreasonable. And Isis was used to help meteor-freaks after she changed and stopped going after Lex.

L 4 minutes ago (edited)

@A that explained it way better than I did. If someone believes they are stopping a huge evil are they evil? Especially when compared to people who do worse things for their own amusement.

[materassassino]

superbat 7.

I went absolutely nuts with this one. It was fun.

Send me a number and pairing!

7. Blue

It isn’t something often seen in Gotham. The air is choked with pollution, the weather always dreary, the summers short and incoherent. Gotham is its own microclimate, so very different from anywhere else. It’s grim and bleak, and suffocating, and Bruce calls it home. It’s where he was born and where he will die, and if anyone asked him, in or out of the cowl, whether he preferred anywhere else, he would growl a denial. Gotham is in his blood, in his genes, she is his and no one else’s, and there’s nowhere else for him.

_

He never would have expected to miss the kiss of the sun, every now and again. He never would have guessed he’d be disappointed at the miserable streaks of grey that shroud Gotham’s sky. He never would have dreamt he’d be looking up and wishing for a streak of colour across the firmament, red and yellow and blue, oh-so blue.

He’d never been asked what his favourite colour was before. He’d never had one before now.

_

People don’t always see Clark properly. It has nothing to do with his secret identity, with the glasses and the ill-fitting suits and the way a man as huge as he is manages to make himself so small, so invisible. No, this is more about where Clark belongs.

Bruce knows perfectly well that if he said that out loud, he’d be misconstrued. They’d interpret it as Luthor-level xenophobic bullshit, read distrust and hatred and envy into it, a snarled statement of how this alien doesn’t belong here, that Earth isn’t for him, that he has no place among them.

(And truly, he’s certain some of their fellow Leaguers see his precautions as something like Luthor’s vindictive schemes. No, Bruce doesn’t distrust, he just needs to be prepared. It’s nothing to do with Clark, and everything to do with a paranoia that has been gnawing at his gut since he was nine years old.)

It’s nothing like what Luthor feels. It’s just that when Bruce sees Clark, he sees someone tethered. Not power to be let loose, but… Clark belongs in the sky. He belongs up there, free and wild, chasing the wind and skimming clouds, bathed in sunlight, lovely against bright blue.

Bruce rephrases it in his mind. Clark doesn’t belong in the sky, he belongs to the sky.

_

There are many different Clark Kents. Or perhaps it would be better to say that Clark has many guises he shows the world.

There is Superman, the bold, the brave, the mighty, the one Luthor calls a god with a sneer, and some call saviour with tears in their eyes. Superman overlaps with Kal-El, the alien, the master of the Fortress of Solitude, the refugee. The child only born, but never raised. The majority of the world knows this façade, and they know absolutely the least of him. There are true and deep parts of him even in this guise: the goodness, the kindness, the decency, the empathy. But the man with the S on his chest, the hope of his planet, isn’t really the true Clark Kent.

There is Clark Kent, prize journalist of the Daily Planet. Lois Lane’s partner in crime, Jimmy Olsen’s best friend, Perry White’s favourite coffee-fetcher. This is the man with a glint in his eye and the nose for a story, who will pull back the curtain on every injustice, bring it kicking and screaming into the light. Bruce remembers his first encounter with this Clark Kent very vividly, how deceptive his disguise was. How quick and cutting his questions were, how easily he knew how to point and aim his enquiries beneath Bruce’s armour. He looks back on that with fondness now, knowing what he does. Again, this Clark Kent is good and decent, and full of empathy, but the thick black rims of his glasses and the hunch of his shoulders are still just a role he plays.

Bruce has seen the real Clark Kent. And he is more magnificent than anyone could ever dream of. Not an alien, not a god, just… Clark.

He sees him one early morning, dawn spilling pink across the Kansas plains. He is facing the east with his eyes closed, his face soft. His clothes are a plain flannel shirt, patched at the elbows and frayed at the edges, and weary jeans, a painting of farm work past all over them. His hair is soft and free, unhindered by the gel he uses to keep it tamed, ink-black curls tossed by the cool breeze. His skin is bronze, warm and inviting, drinking in the morning sun.

He hangs against the sky, arms open as if to embrace it, and Bruce can barely breathe. His heart hammers in his chest, and Clark turns, head tilted curiously. Then he smiles, his cheeks dimpling, and floats over, making a mockery of gravity.

“Morning!” he says, jovial, with a lilt in his voice that somehow disappears when he’s in Metropolis, in either of his other personas.

Bruce hums his greeting, not trusting his tongue just yet. He could lie and say it’s because it’s too early, but he knows perfectly well that’s not the reason.

Clark plants one hand on the windowsill, and with the other he cups Bruce’s cheek. Vaguely Bruce wonders what his unshaven skin feels like to him, and also marvels at how these hands that can tear metal can touch him with a reverence he doesn’t feel he deserves. Clark leans forward, presses a kiss to Bruce’s lips, and Bruce can’t help but feel something melt within him. His muscles relax for the first time in forever, his heart and head are quiet for once.

Clark pulls away – too soon for Bruce’s liking, though he’ll never admit it – and smiles again.

And oh, Clark’s eyes are the colour of the blue blue sky, and Bruce knows what his favourite colour is and always will be.

[singeramg]

Midnight: Chapter 21

Pairing: Clark Kent- Superman / Metahuman! Black!OFC

Universe: DCMCU

Rating: M

Warnings: Angst, Violence, Fluff

Summary: When Gia, a Metahuman by force, left Metropolis, she vowed to never come back because nothing was there for her anymore. Secret in tow, she’s stayed out of the way of anyone that could destroy the life she’s built for herself. What happens when the Justice League needs her help reviving the one man she vowed to never see in the flesh again?

A/n: Hey I just popped out of my academic hellhole to post a new chapter! Love you all Thank you for reading!

Catch up Here! 

Midnight: Chapter 21

It was late as we headed to Freeland. Diana and Barry came along as planned, Diana flew the plane, would be keeping it running while Barry and I broke into the police station’s records department. We needed to find more information on this Alvin Pierce person and how it connected to me. 

Clark and I spent the day spending time with Kalen and Tracy, we couldn’t go out anywhere but when you had a mansion like Bruce’s then you didn’t really need to go anywhere. Kalen was just excited to have both his parents around him at the same time. He wouldn’t rest until we read him a story, funny voices included, then forced us to stay in the bed on either side of him and only then did he fall asleep. I checked in on Tracy and told her Clark was nearby if she needed anything.

It seemed that he was the only one besides myself that she trusted. Which made sense because if you couldn't trust a man who flew you on his back, when you had super strength and had set him up to be killed just hours before, and he didn’t take the chance to drop you in the night sky where no one would find you, who could you trust?

Tracy recognized that and honestly if you wanted anyone on your side it was Superman and seeing as the plan didn’t call for Superman to be blasting through the walls so we both felt it would be more important for him to be here with Kalen, especially for such a short trip. 

*Freeland, Georgia*

I wave my hand, my simple clothes changing into my Midnight suit. Diana and Barry had suited up before we even got on the plane and now that we were landing Barry was itching to run around. I toss an invisibility shield over myself and Barry, while Diana activates the cloaking technology for the jet. Barry and I jump down into the roof, and Diana  heads to the outside of town where she can land in the Forest, but still close enough to get back to us. Meanwhile Victor and Bruce were watching over nearby cameras, internal cameras and Victor was using blueprints and GPS to guide us to where we needed to be inside of the building. Barry and I had dropped down from an outside vent into a supply closet. The precinct was basically empty other than the few night shift officers and a few petty criminals awaiting transport. 

  “Alright guys. The room isn’t far. Leave out the supply closet and then make a left, then on the next hallway make a right.”

I felt for energy in the hallway and once it was clear we walked out the room. The room itself was huge and we didn’t have a clue where to start, even if we could find anything on a case so long ago. 

 “So I walked around and from what I can tell these are more organized by the year than alphabetical. So if we know when Alvin Pierce died we can find it that way.”

 “Hey Vic...”

 “Already on it...here we go. Alvin Pierce died in 83.”

 “Thanks. Alright Barry let’s see if we can find something...”

Barry goes and takes off down one of the aisles, and I follow him after. The row was divided into solved versus unsolved  for that year.

 “Solved or unsolved Victor?”

 “Unsolved. And guys hurry up I think speedy tripped some sort of silent alarm. I know you are invisible but you guys start moving boxes and they are going to know it isn’t a faulty system like I’ve led them to believe. Right now you are on a feed loop. You’ve got a max of 15 minutes before that feed does it’s auto upload into the system and resets the cameras. Then maybe another 3 minutes  before they realize something is wrong and one more before they get in the room. You're cloaked but that won’t stop them from blocking your way out. Get moving.”

 “Yeah thanks. Diana, are you still okay out there?”

 “Yes, just do what you have to do.”

Barry and I begin searching the aisles and due to the sheer number and age it takes ten minutes. I use my energy to encapsulate the box and bring it down. We are just opening it when the door flies open and a blast of energy hits me dead in the stomach, tossing me all the way down the aisle and through the brick wall into the alleyway I tossed a shield to stop damage from the brick wall. Barry is by my side in a second and I toss a stronger shield up a tall black man  in what seems to be an electrical suit tosses another bolt at us. From my blast I know my com isn’t active anymore. Whoever this was was sticking to a no kill policy. It didn’t mean he didn’t want to harm us. I toss my own energy at him with a free hand and this guy tosses his own shield up.

 “Flash, tell Cy and Wonder to hold. I don’t want to add to a bad scene and we still have civilians. Let us handle it for now. Go get the box!”

Meanwhile this masked adversary leans down to our box, and it seems once he looks at the contents his eyes flash and he shoots an even more powerful blast at me, but because I was prepared for it, I could absorb it. His energy was electric and only served to power me further. I can feel his frustration and he decides to charge at me. This begins a hand to hand combat, I get a read on his emotions but his mind is blocked which no matter how new the power was, it was frustrating for it to not be working properly.

 “Who are you and what are you doing in my city?”

His is distorted and odd, clearly meant to hide his true identity.

 “Your city? Last time I checked, no city has an owner. Why don’t you tell me who the fuck you are first. Because right now all you look like is an obstacle that needs to be removed.”

 “And you two look like bugs that need to be squashed.”

A female voice appears from almost nowhere and she breathes before stomping on the ground with enough force to tremble the ground and crack the concrete under her feet.  Because it throws me off balance I hit the ground hard enough that I miss Barry trying to get to me and being hit by a blast. He hit the ground hard and unmoving.

 “Flash?!”

He doesn’t respond, in my fear and anger I toss a shield over him to protect him from what I am about to do.

I charge forward at them, opposite of what Clark had taught me to do, but in my case it worked to my advantage because once this tall dude let off another bolt he hands were occupied and I flipped behind him kicking him in the back on his face and this chick in the matching suit tries to call on her breath again but I’m faster as I grab her by the throat and toss her into a wall. The man's emotions spike from fear to anger. 

 “Oh now you done pissed me off.”

He shoots another powerful bolt at me, using a lot of his strength, but it’s odd because he can pull the electrical  energy from everywhere because the block goes dark, and the only thing lit up is the lasso of energy he has wrapped around me. Now I could have absorbed it, but instead I let him lift me higher, pretending to struggle, just as I am about to kick him and then launch myself into him like a little monkey he says

 “What in the hell do you want with Alvin Pierce? Did Wells send you?”

 “No! Who in the fuck is Wells and why should I tell you?! You are probably one of the bastards trying to kidnap me.”

I kick off his face just as Diana drops down from seemingly the sky but I know it’s the plane still under stealth mode.

 “Let her go!”

Diana flies over and punches him away and we both hear a gasping of air and turn just as his sidekick hits the ground as hard as she can opening a sinkhole. In a previously unprecedented move I surround us in a shield but the shield is floating. The man at this moment feels nothing but dread and honest to god fear. It throws me off because the fear is not for himself, it’s for his sidekick. He tosses another bolt but this time it’s not at us it’s at the plane, and as it is destroyed I strengthened the shield over all of us ten fold and he runs at his sidekick tossing the shield of his own up to protect her from the blast. Two things happen for me at once. First I realize his shield is not strong enough to withstand the blast debris being this close and the overwhelming love he felt for whoever was in that other suit outweighed anything else. He was literally willing to die for her to live and I connected the dots that the emotions I had been feeling from him all circled to what I would do for Kalen. 

He had to be her father or at least family. No true villain of some toady would have done that for his partner.

I toss my own shield up at the pair and brace my shields against it, having to use my hands to force back the blast into the night sky all by 

The feedback from the blast had knocked her out cold and Barry was still out. I drop to my knees, breathing heavy as the energy hurts absorbing into my body. 

The smoke in the air was thick and Diana tried to pick me up but she couldn't. It’s almost like white noise rings in my ears and my head rings. 

 “Midnight! Can you hear me?”

I nod and hoist myself back up resting my elbows on my knees for a few seconds and then back up to full standing. I look around at the damage, Barry is still out cold and I look to the pair and so is the sidekick chick.

 “Hey you check on Flash, I’m going to talk to them.”

I let the shield down and the man steps in front of her body, which both are giving off extreme energy which tells me she is alive. He holds his hands up.

 “Look dude, I am not trying to hurt either of you. I just came for a little information. Not to hurt anyone or trash the city. I am Midnight.”

I hold out my hand for him to shake. Chin high, he takes it, and I laugh as he zapped me. Clearly trying to take me down.

“Is you finished or is you done? Look Mr. Bolts...”

“It’s....Black Lighting.”

“Fine. Mr. Black Lighting. I came for answers and I am not leaving until I get them. I’ll let you in on a little secret. One of my powers is that I can pick up emotions. Your emotions tell me you are not a bad guy. In fact, they tell me a lot about you. The most important thing about this power is it tells me that you love whoever is unconscious right now. That love is parental...”

His eyes flashed, the lighting taking over his irises.

“Would you calm down?! I already told you we never came to hurt anyone. Better yet we have already saved the world once as a collective...anyway. I came for that box inside, it’s the only lead I have into figuring out who Alvin Pierce was and how he relates to me.”

“Why do you think he would have anything to do with you?”

“I just need to know about an article he wrote that was never published. I need to know what he wrote about because it has something about why people are after me.”

 “People are after you?”

He seems concerned for me which surprises me.

 “Yes. My team has only been able to get a little info about whoever this is, but in our digging we saw some info that says they were connected to Alvin Pierce.”

“That could be a dead end.”

“That’s my decision to make. I can’t run the risk of them coming after me again. I have to be prepared for whoever is coming because I have too much to lose if they get a hold of me again. So I’ll take my chances with finding the work of Alvin Pierce. I can distract the people while you two get away.”

 “Fine, but I’m telling you this will be a dead end for you.”

He scoops up his daughter and disappears into the night, meanwhile I go back inside, grabbing a folder from his box and l left, helping Diana lift Berry around the corner to safety as emergency vehicles and police come swarming the area...

*Later*

Diana, Barry and I didn’t have to call Bruce because Superman landed in front of us with relief on his face.

 “I swear you like giving me a heart attack.”

I roll my eyes as he takes Barry from us, slinging him over his shoulder and pulling a card and ID from somewhere on his suit and handing them to Diana.

“Bruce sends his regards. He has a suite booked in the next town over. Also Victor may or may not have borrowed a car to get you there and it should be here...now.”

A SUV pulls up without a driver and the doors unlock. I wave my hand and the door opens, Clark puts Barry in a seat and Diana climbs in on the other side. Clark gets in the driver's seat and I get in the passenger.

*Hotel Roof*

“Of course my girl finds a fight not even 20 minutes on the ground.”

Clark and I are on the roof of the hotel, while Barry and Diana are downstairs in the suite. Victor had the car navigate us to the back, I changed Diana’s clothes so she could go get the keys to the room. She opened the balcony and let’s Clark in with Barry who came about five minutes into being on the plush couch. Now he was inhaling room service pasta with an ice pack while Diana took a shower. Clark and I sneak to the roof. Currently Clark had stepped up to me, his arms wrapped around my waist, as I looked up at him, he looked at me with a smirk right back.

“Hey, well it’s not like I planned on it. This was supposed to be in and out, nothing messy like that.”

“I wanted to fly as soon as that lighting character tossed you through the wall. Bruce told me to trust you.”

“Glad he did. The last thing we needed was Superman coming to drag dude and dudette across the pavement.”

“For you, of course I’m gonna fight for you. I told you before you left I wasn’t letting you go without a fight. Not this time.”

I let my arms go around his neck.

“ Yes, but fighting my battles is a surefire way to ensure you don’t get any.”

I say with a lilt in my voice and then tilting my head back in laughter. He laughs and he picks me up effortlessly, our faces close.

“Oh really? You think I can just let you go again?  Gia do you know how long I’ve been waiting to hold you in my arms like this?”

I shake my head ‘no’

“You are the woman I’ve been waiting for my entire life. So yes I’m going to show up and fight your battles every time if that means I keep you here with me and my son.”

Somehow Clark always knows exactly what to say to me and it takes my breath away. It made me feel like I was nothing more than air. It had only been a few hours of everything being in the open but we clicked together like it had been a lifetime.

“Alright...alright. I’ll let you step in SOMETIMES but this does not give you full carte Blanche to step into all my battles.”

“I know. I prefer you not rip me a new one.”

With that we kiss again and he sits me back down on my feet.

“Come on Superman. We’ve got a folder to go over before we leave Freeland.”

“I need to know more about this Alvin Pierce...”

A/n: So how many of you pegged Freeland, Georgia from my last chapter as the home of Black Lighting? If you did good job! To all my readers you are all amazing and supportive and you rock. Thank you bunches and next chapter is in the works as soon! 

TAGLIST: (Still open for this story or Henry Cavill taglist)

@bloodyinspiredfuck @romyr4 @p3nny4urth0ught5  @thethirstyarchive @kmcmpmd @winchwm @cheyentjj​  @msblkfire84 @magdelen69​ @peeyewpeeyew @agniavateira​ @iloveyouyen​

[davidmann95]

Superman & Lois Pilot Script Review

I’ve been reliably informed that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and indeed as my laptop and everything on it have been unusable for a couple months after a mishap, I went from ‘maybe I’ll write something on the pilot script for Superman & Lois’ to ‘as soon as I can get my hands back on that thing I’m writing something up’. I’m actually surprised none of you folks asked about it when I’ve mentioned several times that I read it; I was initially hesitant, but I’ve seen folks discussing plot details on Twitter and their reactions on here, so I guess WB isn’t making much of a thing out of it. Entire pilots have leaked before and they just rolled with it, so I suppose that isn’t surprising. Anyway, the show’s been pushed back to next year, and also the world is literally sick and metaphorically (and also a little literally) on fire, so I thought this might be fun if anyone needs a break from abject horror. 

(Speaking of the world being on fire: while trying to offer a diversion amidst said blaze, still gonna pause for the moment to add to the chorus that if opening your wallet is a thing you can do, now most especially is a time to do it. I chipped in myself to the NAACP Legal Defense and Educational Fund, and even a casual look around here or Twitter will show people listing plenty of other organizations that need support.)

What I saw floating around was, if not a first draft, certainly not the final one given Elizabeth Tulloch later shared a photo of the cover for the final script crediting Lee Toland Krieger as the director rather than a TBD, but the shape of things is clearly in place. I’m going for a relative minimum of spoilers, though I’ll discuss a bit of the basic status quo the show sets up and vaguely touch on a few plot points, but if you want a simple response without risk of any story details: it’s very, very good. Clunky in the way the CW DC shows typically are, and some aspects I’m not going to be able to judge until the story plays out further, but it’s engaging, satisfying, and moreover feels like it Gets It more broadly than any other mass-media Superman adaptation to date.

The Good

* The big one, the pillar on which all else rests: this understands Lois and it really understands Clark. Lois isn’t at the center of the pilot’s arc, but she’s everything you want to see that character be - incisive, caring, and refusing to operate at less than 110% intensity with whatever she’s dealing with at any given time, the objections of others be damned. Clark meanwhile is a good-natured, good-humored dude who you can see in both the cape and the glasses even as those identities remain distinct, who’s still wrestling with his feelings of alienation and duty and how those now reflect his relationships with his children. The title characters both feel fully-formed and true to what historically tends to work best with them from day one here in ways I can’t especially say for any other movie or show they’ve starred in.

* While the suit takes a back seat for this particular episode, when Superman does show up in the opening and climax it absolutely knows how to get us to cheer for him; there’s more than one ‘hell yeah, it’s SUPERMAN, that guy’s the best!’ moment, and they pop.

* While the superheroics aren’t the biggest focus here, when they do arrive, the plan seems to be that they’ll be operating on an entirely different scale than the rest of the Arrowverse lineup. Maybe they scripted the ideal and’ll be pared-down come time for actual filming and effects work, or maybe they’re going all-out for the pilot, but the initial vision involves a massive super-rescue and a widescreen brawl that goes way, way bigger in scope than any I’m aware of on the likes of Supergirl. I heard in passing on Twitter from someone claiming to be in the know that the plan for Superman & Lois is that it’ll be fewer episodes with a higher budget, more in line with the DC Universe stuff if not exactly HBO Max ‘prestige TV’, and whether it’s true or not (I think it’s plausible, the potential ratings here are exponentially higher than anything else on the network so they’d want to put their best foot forward) they seem to be writing it as if that’s the idea.

* This balances its tones and ambitions excellently: it’s a Kent-Lane family drama, it’s Lois digging in with some investigative reporting to set up a major subplot, it’s Superman saving Metropolis and battling a powerful high-concept villain, and none of it feels like it’s banging up at awkward angles with the rest. There are a pair of throwaway lines in here so grim I can’t believe they were put in a script for a Superman TV show even if they don’t make it to air, and they in no way undermine the exhilaration once he puts on the cape or the warmth that pervades much of it. This feels as if it’s laying the groundwork for a Superman show that can tackle just about any sort of story with the character rather than planing its feet in one corner and declaring a niche, and so far it looks like it has the juice to pull it off.

* While the pilot doesn’t focus on him in the same way as the new kid, Jonathan Kent fits well enough for my tastes with the broad strokes of his personality from the comics, albeit if he had made it to 14 rather than 10 without learning about his dad being Superman. A pleasant, kinda dopey, well-meaning Superman Jr. - the biggest deviation, one I approve of, is that he can also kinda be a gleeful little shit when dealing with his brother in ways that remind you that this is very much also Lois Lane’s boy.

* We don’t know much about the season villain as of yet, but it’s an incredibly cool idea that I’m shocked that they’re going for right away, and I absolutely want to see how they play out as a character and how they’ll bounce off all the other major players.

* The way this seems to be framing itself in relation to the Superman movies and shows before it feels inspired to me: there are homages and shout-outs to and bits of conceptual scaffolding from Lois & Clark, Smallville, Donner, and more, but they’re all shown in ways that make it clear that those stories are part of his past rather than indicators of the baseline he’s currently operating off of. We get a retrospective of his and Lois’s history right off the bat with most of what you’d expect, and combined with those references the message is clear: this is a Superman who’s been through all the vague memories that you, prospective casual viewer, have of the other stuff you saw him in once upon a time, but this series begins the next phase of his life after what that general cultural impression of him to date covers. It strikes me as a good way of carrying over the goodwill of that nostalgia and iconography, while building in that this is a show with room to grow him beyond that into something more nuanced (and for that matter true to the character as the comics at their best have depicted him) than they tended towards. Where Superman Returns attempted to recapture the lightning in a bottle of an earlier vision of him in full, and Man of Steel tried to turn its back on anything that smelled of Old and Busted and Uncool entirely, perhaps this splitting of the difference - engaging with his pop culture history and visibly taking what appealed from some of those well-known takes, while also drawing a clear line in the sand between those as the past and this as the future - is what will finally engage audiences.

The Bad

* This is the sort of thing you have to roll with for a CW superhero show, and that lives and dies by the performances, but: the dialogue varies heavily. There are some really poignant moments, but elsewhere this is where it shows its early-draftiness; a decent amount is typical Whedon-poisoned quippiness or achingly blunt, and some of the ‘hey, we’re down with the kids!’ material for Jon, Jor, and Lana’s kid Sarah is outright agonizing. I suspect a lot of it will be fixed in minor edits, actor delivery, and hopefully the younger performers taking a brutal red pen to some of their material - this was written last January and the show’s now not debuting until next January, they’ve got plenty of time for cleanup - but if this sort of the thing has been a barrier to entry for you in the past with the likes of The Flash, this probably won’t be what changes your mind.

* There are a few charming shout-outs to other shows, but much moreso, Superman & Lois actually builds in a big way out of Crisis. Which is a-okay with me, except that what exactly that was is rather poorly conveyed given that lots of people will be giving this a spin with no familiarity with that. Fixable with a line or two, but important enough to be worth noting.

Have to wait and see how it plays out

* The series’ new kid, Jordan Kent, is so far promising with potential to veer badly off-course. He’s explicitly dealing with mental illness, and not on great terms with Clark at the beginning in spite of the latter’s best efforts, the notion of which I’m sure will immediately put some off. Ultimately the commonalities between father and son become clear, and he’s not written as a caricature in this opening but as a kid with some problems who’s still visibly his parents’ boy, but obviously the ball could be fumbled here in the long term.

* Lois’s dad is portrayed almost completely differently here than in the past in spite of technically still being her military dad who has some disagreements with her husband. There are some nice moments and interesting new angles but it seems possible that the groudwork is being laid for him to be Clark’s guy in the chair, and not only does he not need that he most DEFINITELY doesn’t need that to be a member of the U.S. Military, especially when one of the first and best decisions Supergirl made when introducing him was to make clear he had stopped working with the government any more than necessary years ago. Maybe it can be stretched if his dad-in-law occasionally calls him up to let him know about a new threat he’s learned about, and maybe they’ll even do something really interesting with that push-and-pull, but if Superman’s going to be even tacitly functioning as an extension of the military that’s going to be a foundational sin.

* As I was nervous about, Superman & Lois has some political flavor, but much to my delighted surprise, there’s no grossly out of touch hedge-betting in the way I understand Supergirl has gone for at times. As of the pilot, this is an explicitly leftie show, with the overarching threat of the season as established for Lois and Clark as reporters being how corporate America has stripmined towns like Smallville and manipulated blue collar workers into selling out their own best interests. Could that go wrong? Totally, there’s already an effort to establish a particular prominent right-wing asshole as capable of decency - without as of yet downplaying that he’s a genuinely shitty dude - and vague hints that some of the towns’ woes might be rooted more in Superman-type problems than Lois and Clark problems. But that they’re going for it this directly in the first place leaves me hopeful that the show won’t completely chicken out even if there’ll probably be a monster in the mix pulling a string or two; Greg Pak and Aaron Kuder’s Action Comics may justify Superman punching a cop by having him turn out to be a shadow monster so as to get past editorial, but it’s still a story about how sometimes Superman’s gotta punch a cop, and hopefully this can carry on in that spirit of using what wiggle room it has to the best of its ability.

So, so far so good. Could it end up a show with severe problems carried on the backs of Hoechlin and Tulloch’s performances? Absolutely. But thus far, the ingredients are there for all its potential problems to be either fixed, subverted, or dodged alright, and even when it surely fumbles the ball at junctures, I earnestly believe this is setting itself up to be the most fleshed-out, nuanced, engaging live-action take on these characters to date. And god willing, if so, the first real stepping stone in decades to proper rehab on Superman’s image and place in pop culture.

[thelawyerthatwaspromised]

Why Jon Snow’s Climax Shouldn’t Involve a Battle

How should Jon Snow’s story end? What are we supposed to think about his character this season? Does he deserve to end up on the Throne, perhaps married to Sansa Stark?

To understand my view on Jon’s story and why I don’t hold anything against him so far in Season 8...I think we need to go back to the root of his story. 

Generally speaking, it helps me to analyze a character by asking myself “what’s the ONE THING they want more than anything else?” I’ve come to one big over-arching conclusion: Jon Snow just wants to be loved and “belong” in the context of a family.

That might seem simple but it’s so deeply relatable and complex that I can’t help but feel like it’s been layered many times over within his story.

I’ve written before how Jon Snow shares a ton of similarities to Superman/Clark Kent. A hidden prince from a lost civilization. Raised as a son by a morally upstanding man (the Catelyn issues are a twist on Jon’s upbringing). Confronted by the “last of his kind” and forced to choose between the world he grew up in or the world where he biologically came from. Both Superman and Jon deeply desire to “belong” and it’s something that works in any literary tale.

Superman has every power you can imagine but the second a person feels alone and isolated, they become instantly relatable and sympathetic. 

In a lot of ways, Jon Snow is the same way. He left Winterfell because he just never truly felt he “belonged” though he ached to every day. He joined a sacred order who, no matter their pasts, become his new “family”. Certainly appealing to someone like Jon. He wants to be a Stark, but that seems impossible. So he will remove himself from that environment. 

His most meaningful relationships are formed upon the realization that these different people he meets at the Wall really CAN be like family to him. Sam, Grenn, Pyp, Edd, etc. They all hold a special place in his heart. And yet...Winterfell still calls to him. 

He nearly abandons the Watch on more than one occasion when he gets word of the goings on in the south. And yet he works. And works. And he makes friends of wildlings. He betrays them. He fights them. He makes friends of them again after his brothers elevate him to command.

Then his brothers kill him.

And it’s such a big moment. Jon has only ever wanted to belong to a family. To have true “brothers” and to be accepted. He thought he had that in the Watch. He treated them as a real family. As if he could trust that, even if they disagree, they’re all in it together. 

The place Jon forced himself to go because he never felt he could belong in Winterfell has now rejected him. We saw how rejected he felt. It was about more than being betrayed, it was that he was betrayed by the people he viewed as his FAMILY.

Jon was fully ready to give up. There was seemingly no place for him. Then Sansa road through the gates at Castle Black and put Jon, as Kit Harington puts it, back into a state of action. She reignites him. And he feels that maybe, just maybe, his place is to safeguard Sansa. Maybe he’ll feel he CAN belong, given that purpose. 

They go on to win back Winterfell, together. And yet Jon is thrust into the position as the figurehead of the North when he’s named king. So Jon is meant to rule the place in which he left in the first place because he never really felt like he belonged. Being king doesn’t feel earned to Jon. It’s easy to read in his demeanor. He is good at ruling. He likes helping people. 

But there’s always this same cloud hanging over his reign. 

Worse, in Jon’s mind, is that everyone trusts him for a job that he doesn’t feel he deserves and he doesn’t feel like he’s particularly skilled in performing. He has the trust of all these lords and ladies. He has Sansa’s trust even though he has lingering guilt over the fallout after BotB. And the worst thing imaginable happens; he makes the decision to leave again, this time to try to save the North - and he feels he must betray their trust by surrendering his crown to Daenerys Targaryen.

Jon’s NEVER felt like be belonged in WF. He’s never felt like he deserved to be king. He feels he betrayed their trust. He knows why he did what he did, but it still cuts him every single time he’s reminded of what he did. 

And then Jon is hit with the single hardest thing he’s ever had to deal with: he learns the very essence of his being has always fundamentally been a lie. The one thing Jon has ever held onto about himself..the one thing that ever made him see SOME value in himself was the belief that his father was Eddard Stark. 

Now, that’s gone. Jon, who’s NEVER felt value in himself, who’s NEVER felt like he belonged even as Ned’s son, is plunged into a brand new pit of self-doubt and sense of longing. As Ned’s son? Sure, he could serve some type of role in Winterfell and feel good about it. He could protect Sansa, and then later Bran and Arya. He was forced into a situation where he feels he betrayed them. And now his own identity feels like a betrayal. 

Jon Snow in Episode 4 is in the darkest, deepest state that we’ve ever seen him. He doesn’t feel like he deserves to stay in Winterfell. He doesn’t feel he even deserves to have Ghost. Afterall, the dire wolves were for Ned’s children. Ghost’s physical appearance in Episode 4 is Jon’s inward appearance. He’s mangled. Beaten. Mostly destroyed. 

This is why his status as the “heir” isn’t really changing his course. He has fear of Daenerys and what she might do to his family and that has prevented him from processing one of the most traumatic things an individual can possibly be forced to suffer. 

On top of that, the only way his new “family” will accept him is by REJECTING THAT HE IS A MEMBER OF HER FAMILY. It’s perhaps the most psychologically damaging thing I can imagine. Jon feels lost that he’s not who he thought he was...and the only way he can continue to exist is to lie to himself and the world and pretend it’s still the truth and it’s all because the person who represents his new family is actively preventing him from belonging.

So Jon is aloof. He’s emotionally volatile. He’s clearly depressed. He’s anxious about anyone contesting Daenerys even though he now knows she’s rejecting his Truth. Jon’s given up on belonging. 

It might not be well-liked by some in the fandom...but...

Jon needs rescued

He’s in physical danger, of course. But he’s faced that a million times over. That’s not what is crushing Jon’s spirit. It’s his own self-hatred. 

Depression is beating Jon Snow in Season 8.

This is a fairly profound arc, IMO. It’s subverting expectations, too. Because Jon’s issues aren’t so different from the Hound’s. He’s not that different from Jaime. But Jon’s identity crisis is different because he always WANTED to belong to House Stark contra Jaime or the Hound. Either would likely be relieved to learn they aren’t trueborn sons of their houses. 

Jon is devastated, though. His entire essence was ripped away and now the family he learned he COULD belong to has rejected the very idea that he can ever publicly be acknowledged as a member. 

He’s in a clear spiral. He’s distancing from Sansa and Arya because he feels like he could never deserve the trust they’ve already given him. Their love and support aren’t being accepted - but it’s not because he doesn’t want it, it’s because he hates himself. How could he feel differently? Given his story. There’s a self-hate that CAN’T be resolved (in his mind). He sees no escape. He’s dutiful. He wants to protect the people he loves. And Jon DOES love. But he feels so unworthy of it that he thinks the only option is to disappear and be forgotten by them. 

So why should his climax not involve batte?

Because, in his heart, Jon Snow isn’t just about fighting. He doesn’t enjoy it. He doesn’t want it. Jon wants peace. Jon wants to be loved. Jon wants to feel like belongs. Jon wants to be HOME.

The fact that he still wants what he wanted at the start but he’s constantly sacrificed his own wants for the good of the people he loves makes me confident that the only suitable climax for Jon is a confirmation and realization that he is loved and he belongs. And he needs that as a part of accepting who he really is. Dany can NEVER provide him what he NEEDS because she wants to force him to hide it. The ONLY scenario I see that can fit Jon Snow’s character is being “saved” by Sansa Stark.

And no, I don’t think this has anything to do with the trope of “woman saves man” shit where he’s otherwise destructive and unkind. Jon deserves the love that Sansa would give him. He deserves the home that they could build. He deserves to have the truth of his origins accepted. He deserves to be a Stark, but not based on a lie. He doesn’t see any of this, though. And that’s the great sorrow of his portrayal thus far. I think it’s incredibly accurate and moving, but Jon Snow doesn’t see his own value. He knows Sansa and Arya and Bran and his friends care for him - but he can’t see himself being worthy of it. 

That’s why Sansa working so hard to validate Jon. To crown him. To make him a Stark...it will mean EVERYTHING to Jon. He’s already given more than any reasonable person could be asked to give. He’s accepted that he must, for the protection of his family, go south and just try to keep people alive. He’s given up what he wants. His whole arc since he left for Dragonstone last season has led to him giving up on happiness. Nothing makes this more obvious than the moment Sam and Gilly tell him that they plan to name their baby “Jon” if he’s a boy and all Jon can say in return is that he hopes they have a girl. He can’t imagine a worse fate for their child than to be like him. 

Jon needs saved. Not from physical danger. He needs saved from his demons. He needs home. He needs love. He needs a family. He needs to belong. And most of all, he needs to know that he deserves all of it. 

Jon IS emotionally stunted right now. He IS emotionally closed off. But I’m starting to see that it’s not just poor writing. It’s a function of his state of mind more than anything. His attempted goodbyes tell me as much. Given the chance for positive emotional interactions, Jon chose self-hate. And it made me ache inside.

At the root of it, this is why I can’t see any other end for his character. I truly see Jon’s emotional catharsis as a climactic moment for the series. Much like Frodo turning and smiling to his friends as he prepares to leave Middle Earth was the *actual* climax of the LOTR movies. But here, it’s not Jon finding relief in LEAVING but in STAYING. 

As a Stark. With love, and children, and a home. Even if that home doesn’t end up being Winterfell. And I really truly believe that all of the choices Jon has made this season - including all the things we’d WISH he could say but hasn’t - will culminate in Sansa proving to Jon that he is the man that she knows he is. 

Jon needs his pack.

[superbatbigbang]

The Superbat Big Bang 2019 Masterlist

We’ve officially come to the end of the 2019 edition of the bang. What a fantastic turnout we had: 27 teams posted, and all of our teams that went into art claims made it across the finish line. Our participants put in an amazing effort this year–I hope you’ll join us in giving everyone a hardy round of congratulations.

Click through and/or scroll down to see all of the work posted during the 2019 bang.

Week One

June 29th Detachment bonehandledknife, Sdiosb, SDeeyS (NSFW profile) Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 29k, Explicit (DCU) Bruce is politely poked in the cheek by a flying dick one night. Hijinks, and more worldbuilding than you can shake a dick at, ensue. fic on Ao3 | art by sdiosb | art by SDeeyS (NSFW) | masterpost — June 30th Again I Go Unnoticed Sam4265, TKodami Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Lex Luthor/Bruce Wayne, 42k, Explicit (Smallville) Bruce Wayne moved to Smallville when he was eight years old, beginning a friendship with Clark Kent that would come to define the world. But for now they’re just teenagers in love with all the wrong people, running in circles until they finally find their way to each other. fic on Ao3 | art on Ao3 | masterpost — July 2nd The Incandescent Rose truc, lesbidar Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Terry McGinnis/Dana Tan, 9k, Teen and Up (Batman Beyond) Terry McGinnis (the new Batman) impulsively asks marriage proposal advice from his mentor and grumpy father figure Bruce Wayne. When the older man describes a proposal in which he had been yelled at and abandoned, Terry can’t help investigate the matter by seeing some of Bruce’s most knowledgeable friends and family members. This search prompts someone else into action. fic on Ao3 | art on Ao3 | masterpost — July 4th Flowers in the Dustbin G.G. Kinko (Cheese_kun), magpiebee, SDeeyS Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 9.6k, Explicit (No Specific Continuity) Bruce, now in his early sixties and married for nearly twenty years, was caught off guard by a sudden thought that he suddenly hated the sight of Clark. In an attempt to salvage a marriage that was threatening to fall apart due to Bruce’s sudden indifference, he booked a vacation to remake the bond…from one landmark to the next. fic on Ao3 | art by magpiebee | art by SDeeyS | masterpost — July 5th Mercy for a dreamer Dino_Cattivo, Jayjayverse Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 25k, Not Rated (No Specific Continuity) Clark is happily married to Bruce. But his husband starts acting strange and Clark gets suspicious. At first Clark suspect Bruce of cheating but there is something bigger at work here affecting everyone around him. And Clark is set on finding out what it is. And with every piece of the puzzle he finds the situation just gets more confusing. Clark just wish he could wake up from all of this and go back to the times before everything fell apart. fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost —

Week Two

July 7th The Game of Love Kaizokuhime, lovelastart Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 12k, Explicit (Alternate Universe) In WayneTech VR Augmented Gaming, a guild of superheroes has arisen who volunteer to help police that reality. One of these superheroes, Superman, has had a crush on his fellow member, Batman, for many years, but thus far has had little success on asking him out, even as fellow guildmembers. How will their relationship progress? And how intimate can they truly become without knowing the other’s identity offline? fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost — July 12th Recontre Icedlemon, Ms. 3, Santheum Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 13k, Teen and Up (DCU, Alternate Universe) Life has a way of bringing people together, even if they’re from different planets. fic on Ao3 | art by Ms. 3 | art by Santheum masterpost — July 13th The Opposite of Love Butterflyslinky, mirybdraws Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent/Lois Lane, Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne, 10k, Explicit (Alternate Universe) Twenty years ago, Batman and Superman formed a bond to stop an alien threat. Now that Bruce wants to get married for real, he and Clark will have to travel to an alien planet to break that bond. fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost —

Week Three

July 14th Clark Kent, of Krypton TerresDeBrume, stuvyx Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 98k, Mature (DCU, Alternate Universe) Batman crashes on Krypton a few days before the Turn of the Year celebrations and Kal-El’s life takes a sharp turn to the left, on a path that will ultimately lead him to becoming Clark Kent. fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost — July 15th Through a Glass Darkly susiecarter, lesbidar, Santheum Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 111k, Explicit (DCEU) Post-BvS AU: Batman killed Superman—and then Metropolis was wrecked by Doomsday, not long before Steppenwolf arrived and conquered the world with innumerable swarms of parademons. Bruce’s nightmare has come true, in every way but one: what’s left of humanity is fighting to survive in a hostile wasteland as Steppenwolf manipulates the power of a pair of mother boxes to gradually reshape the planet to serve his needs. But rumors of a threat that could be greater still are finally forcing Bruce to consider taking truly drastic steps. Like bringing Superman back from the dead. fic on Ao3 | art by lesbidar | art by santheum | masterpost — July 16th Bodyguard missigma, Ischa Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne/Female OC, 12k, Explicit (pre-New52 Comics) Today, it is not Batman who is under attack, but Bruce Wayne. Mired in a court battle, he fights to keep his company out of bankruptcy and himself out of jail. But that fight is quickly forgotten as he barely survives an assassination attempt. Clark rushes to his side in Gotham City. With the help of Dick Grayson, he comes to the terrifying conclusion that not only is someone trying to ruin Bruce Wayne, but that person must know his true identity. To protect Bruce, Clark appoints himself as his bodyguard. Despite Bruce’s protests, he accompanies him as Bruce attempts to rebuild his tattered reputation with a new business deal. fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost — July 18th Alternative Beginnings Ischa and Icalynn, with-your-poncho-on Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 25k, Explicit (Alternate Universe) In which Clark’s parents sell the farm and join the circus to keep Clark safe and Dick and Clark grow up as brothers. When Clark is sixteen he falls in love with the very handsome Thomas Kane–but as suddenly as Kane joins the circus he disappears, leaving Clark without a word and brokenhearted. Five years later they meet again in Gotham on the day Dick’s parents die. Clark, feeling guilty about letting the Graysons die and determined to not fail Dick, leaves the circus to get Dick back–and get some answers from Bruce Wayne. But of course Bruce Wayne isn’t the only one with secrets. Meanwhile Dick is out for revenge. He wants the man who killed his parents: Tony Zucco. Dick’s and the Batman’s paths are about to cross. fic on Ao3 | art on Ao3 | masterpost — July 19th I Would Go In Chains (Just To Set You Free) BatsAreFluffy, adumbtree-draws Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 23k, Teen and Up (No Specific Continuity) After an offworld mission goes horribly awry, Clark begins to wonder if the past is really behind him and Bruce. And what better way to deal with the issues than with planetary peace talks, forced transformations, and a psychic bond that doesn’t allow for lying? fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost — July 19th I’ve Seen Your Flag On The Marble Arch minT (justiceleague), mirybdraws, Dino_Cattivo Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Diana Prince/Lois Lane, Past Clark Kent/Diana Prince, 18k, Mature (Animated Movie Verse) He draws Clark to sitting position and pulls him close, hands on either side of his head. He feels the rise and fall of Clark’s chest against his body, and he doesn’t let go because he needs to feel it, to be sure. There’s a crackle over their comms, and Barry’s voice cuts through the noise around them, jarring. “Holy shit, are Batman and Superman hugging?” A reimagining of the events of - and preceding - the Death of Superman, if Clark had fallen for Bruce instead of Lois. fic on Ao3 | art by mirybdraws | art by Dino_Cattivo | masterpost —

July 20th Faal Dovahkiinro Wund dippkip, liodain Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 19k, Teen and Up (Alternate Universe) Ever since that fateful day in Helgen, it seemed Clark’s life in Skyrim was doomed to be anything but simple. Dubbed “Dragonborn” but offered little guidance, Clark must muddle his way across the unpleasantly cold countryside with only his reticent friend Bruce for company. Together they will hunt down a serial killer, save a young boy’s life, and kill a few dragons along the way - all in a day’s work for the Dovahkiin. fic on Ao3 | art on Ao3 | masterpost —

Week Four

July 22nd A Knight’s Heart LilisBooks, carry-on-my-wayward-artblog, boomdeyadah Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne; Lex Luthor/Clark Kent (one sided), 15k, Mature (Alternate Universe) King Bruce is fighting a war he has no desire to be in whatsoever, especially since the war cost him more than he could’ve ever thought, just before it all began. Clark is just a knight fighting for what he has lead to believe is right, unsure of the reasons behind the war King Luthor has against all kingdoms. Is when these two men met that their beliefs are shaken to their core and the connection they share is more than it first leads the eye. This is a tale of knights and Kings, of war within kingdoms and a search for truth and justice with a tad of love along the way. fic on Ao3 | art by carry-on-my-wayward-artblog | art by boomdeyadah | masterpost — July 23rd A Beautiful Lie Killer_Rabbit_of_Caerbannog, JolBalrok Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, minor Clark Kent/Diana, minor Clark Kent/Lois Lane 16k, Explicit (DCEU with nods to Injustice) ‘Pet Sematary’ Barry had said, and Clark wonders if he’d somehow been right about that and he’d come back to life… wrong. False memories tangle with whispers in his head, a future Darkseid promises him, and through it all Clark tries to remember that in this world, his world, he doesn’t know what Bruce Wayne’s kisses taste like. fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost — July 24th Supplicant Holdt & spacewolfcub, Ms. 3 Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Pamela Isley/Bruce WayneBruce Wayne/Other(s)Clark Kent/Other(s), 51k, Explicit (DCEU Alternate Universe) The training and scars of Nanda Parbat run deep— Bruce has always fought the demons that make him want to stalk the night and rend pain unto the deserving. After a decade of trying to stay afloat, using BDSM as both punishment and moral compass, he turns to The Agency. Through them, he finds Mistress Ivy, whose Services help him keep ahead of the encroaching darkness… until he finds his lifeline gone without warning when Ivy’s extreme methods and poison play are revealed and she is exiled. The Agency has a reputation to uphold, secretive as they are. For years, they’ve offered him a chance at salvation—for a price. It is no different now and Bruce grasps desperately at their offer. Can the Service Provider known as Mr. S, the so-called “SuperDom,” help him rein in the Bat? fic on Ao3 | art on Ao3 | masterpost — July 25th The Words We Never Said Mechformers, susscx Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 13k, Explicit (DCEU) Bruce is done pining. It is time to move on, time to heal and live out the rest of his life away from the man of steel. But what is two lovesick puppies to do, when they both need each other, as they need air to live? Misunderstandings are bound to happen, feelings trampled and cast aside as the two greatest men alive try to figure out the ancient wonders of confessions. fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost — July 26th The Shape of my Heart Brenda, Selofain, carry-on-my-wayward-artblog (CrocInCros) Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 27k, Explicit (DCEU) Bruce is impossible, stubborn, willfully self-destructive, and so self-sacrificing it's a wonder he hasn't suffocated under the weight of it. And Clark is stupidly, dizzyingly, crazy about him. Or, post-Justice League, five things Clark learns about Bruce that make him go all heart-eyes, and the time he finally does something about it. fic on Ao3 | art by Selofain | art by carry-on-my-wayward-artblog | masterpost — July 30th The Greatest Way lesbidar, haljords (barrybinary), androbeaurepaire Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 17k, Teen an Up It’s Diana that ascertains their problem. She has an uncanny way of discovering truths that are best kept buried. After a year together, Bruce and Clark are having troubles. To save their relationship, they agree to answer a series of questions designed to foster emotional intimacy. It goes about as well as you’d expect. fic on Ao3 | art by haljords | art by androbeaurepaire | masterpost —

Amnesty

July 31st No More Heroes (In a World so Cold) ComposerofDiscord, SDeeyS Hernan Guerra/Kirk Langstrom, Pre Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 27k, Teen and Up (DCAU/Justice League: Gods & Monsters) Clark and Bruce are visited by an Amanda Waller from another world. She asks for their help with her Superman, Hernan Guerra, who has gone rogue. Clark accepts, and Bruce goes with him When they arrive, Clark wishes to see who Hernan is and what he has done, while Bruce investigates the day Hernan went berserk. With what Bruce has gathered from his investigation and what Clark has seen of Hernan, they must decide who they can trust in the GnM universe: Waller or Hernan, or is there something much larger at play? fic & art on Ao3 | masterpost — August 1st A Golden Bell Hung in My Heart cattyk8 Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 9k, Explicit (DCAU and DCEU Mashup) After finding themselves transported to Faerie, Superman and Batman must navigate an enchanted forest in order to get themselves back to their own plane of existence. Which would be easy enough—they’re not the World’s Finest for no reason, after all—if not for the fact that they’ve been cornered by a unicorn attracted by Superman’s virginity. Of course, who better to pop the Man of Steel’s cherry than Gotham’s Dark Knight? fic & banner on Ao3 masterpost — August 3rd that dwell in dust flirtygaybrit, g.g. kinko, TKodami Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 53k, Mature (DCEU) Things are different after Clark Kent returns to the world: tainted things are made beautiful once more, a long-dormant seed begins to grow, and eventually, nature reclaims its own. Or: Clark plants a garden, Victor keeps a terrible secret, and Bruce faces the consequences of bringing someone back from the dead. fic on Ao3 | art by TKodami | art by G.G. Kinko | masterpost — August 4th Extra Art for The Game (of Love) lovelastart Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, art only art of game characters | flying dance — August 4th Catch a Falling Star architeuthis, G.G. Kinko, mashimero Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, 22k, Explicit (DCEU) Bruce is in the middle of a stakeout when Clark returns from an offworld mission, full of ideas. fic on Ao3 | art by G.G Kinko | art by mashimero | masterpost — August 4th On The Cusp vesper_house, milki3way Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Diana Prince/Lois Lane, 47k, Explicit (DCEU Alternate Universe) Clark’s life isn’t what he imagined it would be. Instead of having a flourishing journalism career, he makes coffe at the Typewriter - coffee shop owned by Lois, his old crush who’s currently dating Diana. He’s lonely, he’s broke, and the only thing that makes him happy is his charity work. However, it takes just one day to turn everything round. Internet fame, investigations, billionaires with secret identities and homeless cats follow through. fic on Ao3 | art on tumblr | masterpost — August 5th Rewrite the Stars crypt_mirror, albilibertea Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, ~20k, Explicit (DCEU Alternate Universe) Clark Kent the Superman, Bruce Wayne the Dark Knight, their soul marks fated them to be together. But fate and destiny seem to have other plans. Even as they play their part, they pay the price. Could they ever rewrite the stars? fic on Ao3 | art on Ao3 | masterpost —

Inktober & Art Prompt Challenge

alienswearglasses (ComposerofDiscord) | When All I Wanted Was You: Day 12, Restraint ariesnohope | Week Six: Snow Day carry-on-my-wayward-artblog | morning kiss, kryptonian styled batsuit, Couch Cuddle, Kidnapped!, Day Four: Rescue, Day Eight: Rainbows, Disco! dino_cattivo | Day One: Capes, Day Four: Rescue, Day Five: Space, Day Eight: Rainbows, Day Nine: Sun, Day Ten: Watchtower, Day 11: Feat of Strength, Day 13: New Costume, Day 15: Interrupted, Day 16: Bat Gadgets, Day 17: Kryptonite, Day 18: Blindfolds, Day 20: Last Son of Krypton, Day 22: Tentacles, Day 23: Flying Together, Day 25: On a Farm, Day 26: Tender Embrace, Day 29: Inopportune Robin, Day 30: Low Effort Joke, Day 31: Soft Vore kaizokunohime | Day One: Capes, Day Two: Masks, Day Four: Rescue lovelastart | stabbed, Day Two: Masks ms. three | superbat practice, Day One: Capes, Day Two: Masks, Day Three: Costume Switch, Day 12: Restraint sdeeys | Good Morning Kiss+Manly beard, Day Six: Teamwork, Suit Porn + Swing Dance, Day Three: Costume Swap, Day 12: Restraint, Day 31: Soft Vore steals-thyme | Week One: beards (manly), Week Two: Kidnapped! sunaddicted | Day One: Capes, Day Three: Costume Switch, Day Five: Space, Day Six: Teamwork, Day Seven: Alleyway, Day Nine: Sun, Day 12: Restraints, Day 13: New Costumes, Day 14: Notebook Doodle, Day 15: Interrupted, Day 16: Bat Gadgets, Day 17: Kryptonite, Day 18: Blindfolds, Day 19: Bad Disguises, Day 20: Last Son of Krypton, Day 21: The Dark Knight, Day 22: Tentacles, Day 23: Flying Together, Day 24: A Stately Manor, Day 25: On a Farm, Day 26: Tender Embrace, Day 27: :peach emoji:, Day 28: NSFW Bars in unlikely places, Day 29: Inopportune Robin, Day 30: Low Effort Joke, Day 31: Light Vore

And that is it for the 2019 Superbat Big Bang! Please be sure to drop our authors and artists kudos, likes, and reblogs and let them know how much you enjoyed their hard work!

[x5red]

Five frequently asked Supergirl CW questions...

...and possible answers from the comics

Check social media. Read the forums. Scroll through the Subreddits. There are some questions that just refuse to go away. Time and time again fans of the CW’s Supergirl show keep asking the same old questions: How does she hide her costume? Who is stronger? Why does nobody recognise her?

Likely the questions will continue to be asked long after Melissa Benoist has hung up her cape on the final episode, but just for fun it might be interesting to take a meander through the 60+ years of Supergirl’s adventures in print, to see how successful the comics were at addressing the tv show’s most quizzed quirks.

Covered herein:

How does Supergirl fit her costume under her everyday clothes?

Why does nobody recognise that Kara Danvers is just Supergirl with glasses?

Is Supergirl more powerful than Superman?

How did Kara get her ears pierced?

How come nobody connects the name Kara Danvers with Kara Zor-El?

It’s roughly a ten minute read, peppered with interesting Supergirl pictures. Enjoy...

#1 -- How does Supergirl fit her costume under her everyday clothes?

The modern tv incarnation of Supergirl seems uncertain as to whether Supergirl’s costume uses a futuristic (and budget depleting) nano-tech solution, or a classic (and cheap) costume-under-clothes trick. Traditionally, with the exception of Matrix’s brief shape-shifting stint in the job, the comicbook Supergirl has tended to favour the latter tactic, prompting fans to ask how her costume fits under her street clothes. The first such query to reach the DC letters pages was from reader Helen Silberman of Irvington NY. In Action Comic #263 (March 1960), Helen wrote:

Dear Editor, I like SUPERGIRL very much. She is my favorite feature. But I often wonder how she conceals the long sleeves on her costume when she wears a short~sleeved dress as Linda Lee.

Acknowledging that this was a common question, editor Mort Weisinger explained that Supergirl’s super costume is super flexible.: “She merely keeps the sleeves rolled up.” This was confirmed inside the strip itself when Action Comics #342 (Oct 1966) saw Linda referencing the costume hidden under her t-shirt, and an editorial caption handily adds “Linda has rolled up the long sleeves of her super-flexible costume.”

But, respond the fans, what about her boots?

Since the Silver Age, Superman has adopted the practice of stashing his Clark Kent attire as a super-compressed parcel inside a hidden pocket in the inner lining of his cape. Various stories confirm that Supergirl does the same, and visual proof of this came in The Daring New Adventures of Superman #5 (May 1983), when she is seen reclaiming her dress from the pocket. Presumably the same pouch could hide her boots when dressed in her everyday identity?

Okay, so the boots are super-compressed inside the cape, but what about the cape itself?

This is where things start to get a little problematic.

There’s plenty of mid-transformation frames stretching back as far as Supergirl’s early Silver Age antics depicting her wearing her cape underneath her regular clothes. How she does this seems never to be explained, so we probably have to chalk this one up to a comicbook trope that readers (and now the tv viewers) just have to accept.

#2 -- Why does nobody recognise that Kara Danvers is just Supergirl with glasses?

Supergirl has adopted various means of masking her true identity down the years. The tv Supergirl hides behind a pair of glasses; her comicbook counterparts have variously used wigs, special molecule-rearranging hair dyes, shape-shifting, and advanced DEO technologies. None of these, with the exception of Matrix’s ability to shape-shift into Linda Danvers, really stands the real-world credibility test.

The problem here is that the comicbook superhero genre has its origins in a more simplistic storytelling age, were the application of just a pair of glasses, or a wig, or a fake moustache, was sufficient to create a false identity. There’s countless examples from Superman’s early decades of Lois Lane fooling the Man of Steel with just the application of a wig, and indeed the epic Silver Age tale that first revealed Supergirl’s existence to the world hangs on evil Kandorian scientist, Lesla Lar,successfully fooling Superman into believing she is Kara Zor-El by just rearranging her hair.

One can argue that Kara’s use of a wig is potentially a better disguise than Kal-El’s glasses and change of posture, but ultimately both methods have severe limitations. Research conducted by the universities of York and Huddersfield (UK) suggested that while some disguises (makeup, wigs, etc.) are effective at hiding a person’s identity, the effectiveness drops if the subject is known to the person doing the identifying. As such, in the real world, neither Clark nor Kara would stand a chance of fooling their friends and colleagues.

In Superman #330 (Dec 1978) there was a half-hearted attempt to address the problem by suggesting that the Kryptonian glass used in Clark’s eye-wear boosts a subconscious super-hypnotises power, projecting an image of Clark as feeble, but this created more problems than it solved. What happened when Clark anchored the WGBS News on tv; and how did Linda Danvers get by without any Kryptonian face furniture? So, sadly, the comics don’t really provide much of an answer -- we must write the problem off as a relic from a bygone storytelling era, that modern audiences just have to accept as part of the established baggage that comes with superheroes.

#3 -- Is Supergirl more powerful than Superman?

Although both Superman and Supergirl have Kryptonian origins, their route to Earth was markedly different. Kal-El arrived as an infant, while Kara didn’t arrive until her teenage years. Fans (at least those who have wont to obsess over such matters) have therefore speculated about how this affected their power levels.

When Supergirl first appeared in comics it became clear early on that Kal-El and Kara Zor-El had identical superpowers. There isn’t a direct comparison of the two cousins -- they never went head to head -- but DC’s writers certainly seemed to adopt the principle that any super-feats that Superman could do, Supergirl could do just as well.

That said, during Supergirl’s long history there have been periods when the power balance has clearly shifted. For example, it is reasonable to assume that the Matrix Supergirl (both pre and post merger with Linda Danvers in Volume 4) was less powerful than the Man of Steel. Indeed in the latter part of Volume 4 -- the period when Supergirl sported a white t-shirt and gloves -- she was significantly de-powered, even losing the ability to fly.

Likewise from Adventure Comics #402 to #423 (Feb 1971 to Sep 1972) the Girl of Steel had intermittent issues with her superpowers, thanks to the effects of a drug concocted by super-villain Starfire. At inopportune moments her powers would fail her entirely, resulting in Kara relying on various gadgets developed in the Bottle City of Kandor as a backup.

But wait a moment... because the balance of power hasn’t always shifted in favour of Superman.

During this Bronze Age period Superman also had issues with his powers. As part of a shake-up of the character, editor Julius Schwartz instigated a story running across Superman #240 to #242 (July to Sept 1971) that saw Superman lose a third of his power levels... permanently(!!) This was part of Schwartz’s plan to curb some of the silly excesses of Silver Age. Some fans have noted, however, that the Girl of Steel’s power loss was only intermittent, and eventually the effects of Starfire’s drug wore off entirely, so in September 1972 she technically became 50% more powerful than her cousin.

#4 -- How did Kara get her ears pierced?

Since the tv show began fans have been asking about how Kara could have pierced her earlobes of steel. It is clear from the opening moments of the pilot episode that Malina Weissman’s young Kara doesn’t appear to have any piercings when departing the dying Krypton, yet when the episode skips forward a decade to Melissa Benoist’s twenty-something Kara, she clearly does.

Show creator and producer, Ali Adler, responded to a fan’s tweeted question by suggesting that Kara had her ears done “At the mall on #krypton”, which is a fun answer, but doesn’t seem to concur with the pilot. So is there an explanation from deep within comicbook lore?

Yes. (Probably!)

The most likely explanation is that Kara used her heat vision and a mirror to burn the holes into her own earlobes. Since the early Golden Age era it has been established that Superman is strong enough to piece his own skin with his fingernails, allowing him to give a blood sample. Editors initially responded to inquiries about how Superman shaved or cut his hair and nails by suggesting that these parts of his anatomy didn’t grow under Earth’s sun. But eventually, as Superman spent more time on alien planets, they devised more creative solutions -- the heat vision haircut was one of them.

In the comics, Injustice 2 #21 (May, 2018) finally let readers see Supergirl (at least a version of Supergirl) using heat vision to cut her hair. Meanwhile the tv show had already treated viewers to Kara giving a super-trim to Mon-El’s mop in episode 2x05 - “Crossfire” (okay, so he was a Daxamite not a Kryptonian, but hey, same difference!) This suggests that Kara’s invulnerability can be defeated by her own powers in the tv universe, just like the comics, so a piercing blast from her eyes rather than a trip to the mall is probably the most satisfying answer.

#5 -- How come nobody connects the name Kara Danvers with Kara Zor-El?

It may be a small problem, but it’s one that clearly bugs some viewers. Kara Danvers not only has the same first name as Kara Zor-El, but she also pronounces it in the same distinctively European way -- “Kar-ah” not “Care-ah” (despite what Cat Grant may want us to think.)

How does she get away with this?

In the comics this generally hasn’t been a problem. Prior to the Melissa Benoist tv show, Supergirl had been known as Linda (Linda Lee, Linda Lang, Linda Danvers), or as Mae (short for Matrix), or briefly as Claire Connor. Only Kara Kent, the Supergirl of the cartoon show, Superman: the Animated Series (1996), had stuck with her Kryptonian first name. This changed in 2016, however, when DC adopted many of the tv Supergirl elements into its comicbooks, including the Kara Danvers secret identity.

Up until the tv show’s fourth season it could be argued that Benoist’s Supergirl had been very careful never to make her birth-name public, so there was little opportunity for anyone to link her two personas. But that changed in episode 4x14 - “Stand and Deliver”, when Kara can clearly be heard announcing herself as “Kara Zor-El, citizen of Earth” at a public protest, as a crowd watches. So very likely, after that incident, the Maid of Might’s Kryptonian name was plastered all over social media, and given Kara Danvers’ high profile as an award-winning journalist, we’re no closer to explaining why an army of armchair sleuths on Facebook or Reddit haven’t connected the two women.

Sadly the comics can’t really answer this Kara conundrum, because it is a problem largely of the tv show’s own making. Perhaps the only solution is to ignore episode 4x14 and assume that everyone in National City (aside from the regular cast) live in blissful ignorance of Supergirl’s Krypton name.

Conclusion

So it’s a mixed bag of success and failure. The comics provide answers to some problems, but come up empty handed for others. But perhaps we shouldn’t be too disheartened. Sure, it may be fun to devise answers to the quirks and oddities of the tv show, but ultimately it won’t stop fans from asking the same questions time and time again. The sillier aspects of superheroes are part of the genre’s charm, and trying to devise clever ways of explaining away the wackier elements is all part of the fun.

Hopefully you found the above an entertaining and informative read, but the five proffered answers shouldn’t discourage anyone from dreaming up their own explanations -- after all, these questions aren’t really properly answered until the tv show’s writers choose to answer them.

Until then, we can all have fun speculating.

[evilpixiea]

First Date

Clark was nervous.

“Hey Lois? Which tie do you think looks better? Red or blue?”

She didn’t look up from her magazine. “Blue.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“It matches your eyes.”

He thought about his eyes. His freakishly blue alien eyes. “Is that a good thing?”

She shrugged.

He picked the blue one, held it against his collar, and looked at his reflection in the mirror. Dropped it onto the mattress and repeated the process with the red one. Decided on the red one.

“What about my glasses? Do you think I should wear them? I mean, it’s not like I’m going to have to protect my secret identity or anything but—”

“Then why are you wearing that frumpy old suit?”

He looked at her, hurt. “What’s wrong with the suit?”

She sighed and dropped the magazine. “Apart from being about a decade older than you? Nothing. Nothing at all. What I don’t understand is why are you asking my advice at all? You’re almost forty. This isn’t the first first date you’ve ever been on.”

That was true. This wasn’t the first first date he’d ever been on. It wasn’t even the fifth first first date he’d been on. Or the tenth. He shouldn’t be as nervous as he was. But, in all fairness, he’d never had a first date with Bruce Wayne before. Aka, the man he’d been secretly in love with for most of his adult life.

“I think I’ll go without the glasses.”

“I agree,” Lois said.

“On second thought…”

She groaned. “And that’s another thing. Why ask for my advice if you’re just going to do the opposite of everything I say?”

“Oh… I didn’t mean…”

She glared at him. “You look fine, Smallville. Really. You’ll knock him dead.”

He flinched. “Eh…”

“Right. I’m sorry. Super strength. Poor choice of words. What I mean is, everything will go well. Stop fretting. This is Batman we’re talking about. What could go wrong?”

*

As it turns out, a lot could go wrong starting with the restaurant he’d booked in losing his reservation. Clark’s Plan B restaurant was closed when they arrived and then, while they were walking to the plan C restaurant, it started raining. Clark tried to use his jacket to keep Bruce dry which seemed very gentlemanly at the time but by the time they arrived to the third restaurant it meant his shirt was very see-through - thank God he wasn’t wearing his Superman suit - and thus they weren’t allowed in.

In the end the only place that would take them was a rundown family diner with loud wallpaper and even louder kids. Bruce had never looked so out of place in his sleek black suit and silver tie.

“So,” Clark tried to strike up conversation despite the noise. “How’s the steak?”

“Not good.”

Clark wasn’t surprised. His pasta tasted like it had just come out of the microwave.

“So… eh… how’s work?”

Bruce’s eyes were on his food. “Not good.”

“Oh. That’s too bad. Um… how are the kids?”

“Dick’s mad at me. Don’t know why. I have no idea where Jason is. Tim stole and crashed one of my cars two nights ago so he’s grounded. Damian is… Damian.”

“Oh… I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“Still... I’m sorry.” This was it. This was his once chance with Bruce Wayne... and he was screwing it up. No. It was okay. He just needed to relax. It was dinner. Just dinner. They had dinner all the time. Bruce wouldn’t blame him for this... would he?

“How about yours?” Bruce asked.

“Mine?”

“Your kids.”

“Oh. Um. Well.” He cleared his throat. “Kara’s apparently been doing really well but that’s only what Diana’s told me. She hasn’t called or messaged me in weeks. But that’s okay. She’s an adult now. Conner is madly in love. Won’t tell me to who, just that they’re grounded and he can’t see them so he’s miserable. Chris is getting used to high school. Slowly. He still struggles with human languages a bit and isn’t used to being around so many people. And Jon… well… I think Jon’s decided he wants to spend more time at his mum’s house.”

“That must be hard.”

“It’s okay. Lois is still one of my best friends. It could be a lot worse. Besides, it is a way nicer house. I don’t blame him for not wanting to spend too much time in my apartment.”

“I could help you out with that if — ”

“No,” Clark cut him off, a little too abruptly. “I’m sorry,” he said, softer, realising his mistake. “I just... I don’t want you to pay for my apartment.”

Bruce looked down at his food. Didn’t say anything.

In fact, he didn’t say anything for the rest of the dinner. Not until they were outside standing on the pavement and Clark was miserably comparing their situation to the romantic one he’d envisioned in his head. When he’d planned this date he thought they would have an amazing meal, full of conversation and laughter. Afterwards they would take a stroll through the park, kiss under a streetlight, and then go back to Bruce’s hotel.

It didn’t look like any of that was going to happen.

“Are you going to call a cab?” Clark asked.

“My ride will be here soon.”

“It will?”

“I would rather not take another walk through this weather.”

Clark flinched. “Fair enough. Um... yeah. Sorry about that.”

“Stop apologising.”

“Sor—eh. Okay.”

Bruce sighed and looked at him, grey eyes shadowed in the low light. “Why did you invite me out tonight, Clark?”

"Don’t you know?”

“I do. But I want to hear it from you.”

Clark licked his lips. “I guess after... after that mission where you got wounded... and I told you... I told you I l...” He trailed off.

Bruce was watching him, waiting.

He sucked in a deep breath. Continued. “I told you I loved you. And you said... you said you did too. And I guess... I guess I thought the next step was this. I know it didn’t really go according to plan but... I don’t know. I hope...”

“Do you?”

“What?”

“Love me?” Bruce’s look was unreadable. “I understand I was wounded. Emotions were high. It’s okay if this isn’t what--”

“No! This is what I want, Bruce. This is all I’ve ever wanted. I’m sorry I’ve been so awkward tonight. I guess I just wanted things to go well and I was scared they weren’t. But I do. I love you. I want this.”

Bruce studied him for a long moment. Then, slowly, carefully, he reached out and took Clark’s hand in his, brought it up to his lips, and kissed Clark’s knuckles.

And oh God that really just happened. Bruce just kissed him. Not where he wanted him to kiss him but he had. It had happened. He hadn’t ruined everything with this terrible date.

Clark thought about seizing him and kissing him properly, right there, in the rain, outside the shitty family diner. But he couldn’t. He was shaking, as nervous and as excited as he’d been on his first first date.

“Bruce...” he tried. “I... I think I...”

The taxi pulled up. Except it wasn’t a taxi. It looked like a Rolls-Royce.

Of course. Bruce was a billionaire. Of course he couldn’t just call a cab. 

Clark’s heart fell as Bruce’s hand dropped out of his. He watched as he opened the back door and slid into the seat.

But it was okay. It wasn’t the first date he’d imagined having with Bruce Wayne but that didn’t mean it was his last date. If that kiss had meant anything at all surely it meant this wasn’t the end.

He clung to that thought as he turned to begin the long walk home.

“Clark.”

He stopped. Looked over his shoulder.

Bruce was watching him through the open door of the car. “Where are you going?”

“...home?” He answered.

The look the other man gave him was pure Batman scorn. “Get in the car, Kent.”

And that was the moment Clark realised perhaps this date hadn’t gone as badly as he thought after all.

[antis-delete-your-blogs-pls-thx]

Mouse’s Reclist (#1/?)

Okay, it is time. Time to get working on the incredibly frustrating (but rewarding) task of putting together a fic reclist (the EDM one is next). No, none of my own are going to be on here, I literally know antis would accuse me of doing that for clout. If you want my own fics, DM me :). They probably suck, most of them are really self-indulgent, and I have an update schedule that embodies the slow feeling of trying to download free porn from a dial-up connection in 1997. And your mother is picking up the phone when you’re at the last megabyte and makes you start over. Or something.

I’m going to put a hotlink on the title and probably the author, if that’ll work super easy in a format transfer. Then I’ll post the fandom, pairing, and fic summary in italics, and uh, possibly a small review with some warnings. Keep in mind I can’t be as thorough as the authors themselves, if they’ve chosen to tag at all, because while I do reread these often, I can’t remember every exact trigger. Some of these are fluffy, and some of these are FUCKED UP. Capital F, capital U. Let’s get started. Not organised by fandom or by alphabetical order or by length because my ADHD just says “ONTO THE NEXT LINK GOGOGOGOGOGO” every five seconds. Google docs,,,, stop yelling at my grammar and let me do this thing. There should be about 30 or so under the cut. (Maybe I’ll do more?)

Obviously the first is Three Missing Girls in Madison, Wisconsin by lapsi. This is the Mindhunter Bill/Holden rec that I posted, like, four days ago, and what inspired me to post my own little oneshot drabble. You can check for that in my recs tag for a more detailed description. Let’s just say it’s fucking gorgeous. Everything by lapsi is gorgeous.

Revalations by Anonymous - MCU/Starker/WIP - “I still don’t get it,” Ned says. “How you just... keep being ordinary in spite of all the craziness you’ve lived through. You were in space. You helped Iron Man save the universe. And nobody knows it was you.” His tone softens, becomes almost sad. As though he realizes that what he’s saying is so completely alien to him that he will never be able to understand this part of Peter’s life. “Peter, don’t you want people to know you for who you are?”//An AU where they get the Gauntlet off of Thanos that first time, on Titan. - This is a sort of supremely fucked up but also absolutely beautiful Starker fic with aged up!Peter. By, like, three years, and he’s still essentially Tony’s sugar baby, but whatever. It’s literally an absolute amazing ride.

the spaces between the stars by indigostohelit - Generation Kill/Bradnate - Lieutenant Nathaniel Fick of the USS Devil Dog is returning to Earth with the weight of the world on his shoulders: his captain is incompetent, his crew is half in mutiny, and the mission to a distant star may have been more of a failure than anyone could have comprehended. But on the journey back, something in the ship goes terribly wrong—and Nate may have to bear far more than the weight of the world if he's going to keep his men safe. - Okay, what fandom ancients still remember Generation Kill? Warnings in and of itself for just the general nature of camaraderie on that show. I’m usually a Bradray sucker (remind me to get to those next time), but this was fucking fantastic. Sci-fi mystery AU is my absolute FAVOURITE genre, hands down, all time, ever. And indigo has written a veritable basketload of my fav fics besides, so I can always trust in them.

All of Astolat’s MegOp fic - Transformers/MegOp - ‘Nuff said. She’s the founder of the goddamn site. You’re damn straight I’m going to fawn over her fic. Also it’s fucking good, founding the site aside. I cried. I cried so fucking much. I dripped tears like a sponge.

The White Road by perverse_idyll - Harry Potter/Snarry - One day, comfortably set up in the afterlife, Lily Evans Potter switches on the telly and gets hooked on the Harry Potter show. - Okay, first, this is the only time I’ve literally ever seen one-sided Snily where Lily was the one pining. Anyway, the summary explains the premise, but doesn’t do it justice. Lily watches down on the many possible universes that contain her son’s future from a comfy spot in the afterlife. The relationship between literally everyone in the fic and Severus is… exquisitely-detailed and heart-wrenchingly painful. I’d die for this fic, so I could read a million versions of it in the afterlife.

Rapture by mia_ugly - Harry Potter/Snarry - Snape sees the man, for the first time, on his twenty-fifth birthday. - I fucking bawled my eyes out the first time I read this. And the second. And the third. Dumbledore gives Harry a time-travelling watch for his birthday. A watch that travels to a young Severus, who Harry gets to know. On a pretense, of course. And then he falls in love with him. They both do. It’s absolutely agonising angst, but it has a happy ending. It will fucking pack a punch though, so get the tissues ready. This one is perhaps my favourite Snarry fic of all time. Period. Please don’t pass it up. The writing is so fucking amazingly-crafted. I would sell my soul to write like this.

Shell Game by forthegreatergood - DCU/Superbat - Batman wants Superman. Superman wants Batman. Eventually they'll get it sorted out. - An absolutely spot-on identity porn fic. As cheesy as the summary sounds, this fic hits hard. And it has sex pollen. Who can resist sex pollen? Pun intended, maybe.

Every Superbat fic by Susiecarter. - DCU/Superbat - Susie is a friend of mine (fucking,,, don’t know how I managed that one, apparently I write good enough fic for them to read,,, astonishing), and one of Superbat fandom’s greatest contributors. One of DCEU fandom’s greatest contributors, in fact. Everything they’ve written is a masterpiece. But the ultimate fav? as to which may be the true. Hands down. IDENTITY PORN GALORE.

The Long Hangover by CoffioCake - DCU/Superbat - Clark knows he should take a break: His powers are on the fritz, he feels like shit, and Batman’s treating him like a liability. But Gotham's villains seem to have it in for Metropolis' Big Blue Boy Scout and Clark won't just wait around for answers. Batman might be the world’s greatest detective, but Clark Kent is one of the Daily Planet’s most tenacious reporters.//This is definitely a job for Superman. - Okay, I can’t promise another Superbat won’t show up on this list. I’m a sucker for it. I’m also a sucker for case fic. Which is this. It’s so good. So good.

No Glory (and everything else in the HP fandom) by ObsidianPen - Harry Potter/Tomarry/WIP - The Dark Lord divines what Harry Potter is in the Forbidden Forest, and revelations lead to incomprehensible consequences. Lord Voldemort has won... and the dystopia is damning.//A tale of a fallen hero, dark desires, and a Dark Lord's obsession with something he has lost and finds himself unwillingly lusting after: a soul. - This is a Voldemort wins!AU. A fucking delicious one. If only my own Tomarry could aspire, by god. The imagery in this is so vivid I could swear it was painted on my eyelids. The concept of soul magic and interpretations on Horcruxes is unique and perfectly-executed. Honestly, everything Obsidian has ever written for HP is perfectly-executed. I would probably consider this the definitive Tomarry/Harrymort fic. Seriously.

It Cages a Demon by TripleX_Tyrant - Rick & Morty/C137cest/WIP - When Rick captures a powerful being from a demonic dimension - a demon with the ability to devour thoughts - Morty's consciousness is pulled into the demon's cage. Rick must go in after him before Morty's consciousness is completely consumed. But this isn't what the inside of the cage should look like. And if Rick wants to save Morty, he'll have to survive in a place where paths are unclear and monsters manifest.//Rick knew his own mind was complex. But he wasn't ready for this. - A goddamn Silent Hill-style horror mystery AU??????? FOR RICKMORTY? Yep, you heard me. And every second of it is liquid gold. It’s also gory as all fuck and pants-shittingly terrifying at times, so read at your own risk. But if you can risk it, please do. It’s honestly the best execution of C137cest I’ve seen outside of Harmon’s own damn writing lmao.

The Book of Secrets by Are - Downton Abbey/Thommy - With a war of words and wills, Jimmy Kent and Thomas Barrow embark on a strange romance. Set Post Christmas Special. - Thommy is another rare-ish (now, post-2016) pairing that I would die for. And everything Are has ever written for the pairing could kill me and I would thank it. But TBS is the best. Jimmy finds Thomas’ diary (and poetry book), which was also the diary (and sketchbook) of Courtenay before his passing, and learns more about his past and his innermost thoughts. It’s the most haunting, heartbreaking, poignant fic in the pairing. It ends well, but the journey you’ll take from the first chapter is one I would pay money to experience for the first time again. I literally couldn’t even breathe for a while after this. Lapsi’s fic has the same effect, so if you’ve worked through that one by now, be prepared.

Mad Man by griseldajane - MCU/Thorki - In all the years they spent together, it never occurred to Loki that there might be a time when Thor would not be available to him. The god of mischief conceals himself, coming and going as he pleases, doing what he wants.//That Thor might one day do the same never crossed his mind. - All the mindfuckery a Convinced-You-Were-in-an-Insane-Asylum-the-Whole-Time!fic entails and more. If you have issues with dissociating from reality, this is probably a bit much, because it absolutely nails everything about derealisation, delusional thinking, and paranoia. GOD, if you’re willing to let your mind take that battering, though, it’s a damn work of art.

Switch by Ceres_Libera - Star Trek/McKirk - The life and times of Leonard H. McCoy MD/PhD … If Leonard McCoy's life could get any fucking weirder, it would be … Jesus, he didn't even want to think what that could possibly mean, because it's already been too fucking weird to make any kind of rational sense.//A Starfleet Academy story, set in the ST:XI universe. - The ultimate McKirk fic imho. We’ll get to my ultimate Spirk fic in a second. Please do read this. It’s everything you could want out of an Academy!fic. Especially a roommates/UST!fic. 

Black Mirror by DarthNickels - Star Wars/Gen - The Ghost crew returns to the Lothal when they hear the Empire is investigating the Jedi Temple there. They learn Vader is alone and decide to take him out-- but what they find could change the course of Galactic history. - What, you think I don’t read Gen? I read Gen!!!! Look at all this Gen I read. Put simply, Dad!Vader redemption arc set in the Rebels era. FUCKING,,, what more could I ask for,,, literally. What more?????????? Sci-fi mystery??? ASKING FOR MORE WHOMMMMMST’VE????

The Lotus Eaters by aldora89 - Star Trek/Spirk - Stranded on the planet Sigma Nox while searching for a missing away team, Spock and Kirk find themselves pitted against a disturbing native life form. With the captain out of commission on a regular basis and Spock struggling to preserve his stoicism, staying alive is difficult enough – but when a slim chance for escape surfaces, their resolve is truly put to the test. Together they must fight for survival in the heart of an alien jungle, and in the process, uncover the mystery of the planet’s past. Slow build K/S. - Here’s that aforementioned ultimate Spirk fic. Okay, what, it’s sci-fi mystery again. Give me a break. You just heard how much I would absolutely die for it. Seriously, there is no Spirk fic I adore more than this. I mean, I adore an absolute shittonne of Spirk fics, but this one is my raison d’etre.

In Good Company by weialala - Naruto/Sasunaru - This will sound a little ridiculous, no matter how Sasuke phrases it. I see dead people is embarrassingly tacky, and I'm half-spirit seems like something Sakura might say when she's stoned sky high. So he settles for a shrug. - Sasuke sees dead people. Sasuke bonds with the goddamn fae. Kuchiyose no Jutsu taken to the fucking max. An epic that does what The Last pretty much couldn’t. Shippuden who???

The Boy Who Died A Lot by starcrossedgirl - Harry Potter/Snarry - Harry’s always been known as The Boy Who Lived. Only Severus knows that this is a lie. (Or: a portrait of Severus Snape, in seven acts.) - Oh, there’s Snarry again. Bite me. This is my second (third? Tied with the White Road?) favourite Snarry fic. Time travel, almost Groundhog Day style. Severus has to go back and fix every mistake Harry makes that leads to his untimely death throughout the seven books. I honestly could believe this is what really happened, and we just don’t know otherwise because Rowling hasn’t deigned to make this shit up and put a woke spin on it yet.

Kisses Cursed by The_Fictionist - Harry Potter/Tomarry - Fairytale AU. Loosely inspired by Beauty and the Beast.//Some said he was once a man, cursed, and some that he sold his soul to demons and became one in turn. Others said that such evil as he could never have been human. That he was instead a nightmare, left lingering upon the earth a very long time ago.//Harry just knew it wasn't safe to walk near the Riddle House after dark. - Not just a fairytale AU, but a MYSTERY(!!!!) fairytale!AU. Okay, who’s gotten that I love mystery by now? This one is amazing, no matter how many puzzle pieces have slotted into place. The ride is a wild one and a great one. My second favourite Tomarry fic. I’d rank more of The_Fictionist’s higher, but they’ve deleted a lot of their old stuff, despite me absolutely adoring it.

United States v. Barnes, 617 F. Supp. 2d 143 (D.D.C. 2015) by fallingvoices & radialarch - MCU/Stucky - The Associated Press @AP//Winter Soldier set to stand trial for Washington D.C. massacre and treason apne.ws/1og6SWE - Both an epistolary/media fic and a case fic? Sign me tf up. Came out mere seconds (I exaggerate a little) after TWS, which I instantly fell in love with in theatres (still my fav MCU movie, folks). Details what a trial would be like for James Buchanan Barnes, should the MCU function more like real life, all in newspaper/tweet/blog form. Best way I’ve seen epistolary!fic formatted, tbh. Only on the AO3, huh?

The Mirror by cloudyjenn - Supernatural/Destiel - When Dean touches a strange mirror, he's whisked away to one alternate reality after another and it doesn't take him long to realize the universe is trying to tell him something. - I love dimension hopping. And it’s for my first ever hardcore fandom (besides Pokemon), too! I usually see dimension hopping more in sci-fi and superhero fandoms, so it was nice to see it in fantasy, too. A million alternate dimensions where Dean and Cas are in love. It’s definitely a message. :eyes emoji:

Stay With Me (home is where your mind is.) by sara_holmes - Marvel/Stony - Where Steve doesn’t quite die, ends up stranded in the multiverse and would quite like to know how the hell so many versions of himself ended up sleeping with Tony Stark. Well, that’s going to make things a tad awkward when he gets home. - Speaking of dimension hopping in superhero fandoms. This is honestly the most interesting way I’ve seen dimension hopping played out. Or rather, dimension consolidating. Steve ends up in a purgatory-style void populated only by other versions of himself from throughout the Multiverse. Like the Mirror, there’s definitely a message being sent here about how many versions of him are doing the do with a certain genius playboy billionaire philanthropist. 

Thicker than Water by StarkatHeart - Marvel/Stony/Superfamily - Neither of them would admit it, but blood does count for something.//When Peter Parker discovers his biological father is actually none other than Tony Stark, it's not exactly news that's well received. By either party. But they're Avengers. They're teammates. They'll just have to work through it. ...Or maybe just ignore it. - On a completely different note from Starker, or not-so-different, depending on how depraved you like your fic to be flavoured, Peter as Tony’s biological son. This is pure Superfamily, not a hint of fucked up incest to be found. Though if anyone has any fucked up incest recs, I’m down to get my dirty paws on them.

the undiscovered country by indigostohelit - Shakespeare/Hamratio - It's 1959, and the mayor of Chicago is dead. - Remember how I said indigo had written some of my fav fics before? Yeah, 1950’s Americana!AU Hamlet, with added Hamratio. It is as good as it sounds.

All of astolat’s GoT and Thor works TBH. But please don’t pass up her Thorki, especially not Chaos War and Revelations. 

Reaching as I Fall by apokteino - Supernatural/Destiel - “Service to God was the meaning of existence; service to Michael is nothing but slavery.” Castiel is part of an underground network helping angels fall, in resistance to heaven. At the same time that a fallen angel by the name of Dean Winchester turns up, some of those in the network are murdered by Michael’s forces – there’s a spy. What does Dean have to do with it? Who is Dean? And why are they hunting him so fiercely?//A story about love, family, and choice. - Let me introduce you to my favourite AU concept from all of SPN fandom. No, I won’t spoil it. Needless to say, I’ve tried to write it myself a thousand times, and only succeeded in a thousand false starts. Maybe one day I’ll get around to it. Plus, I always disagree with these authors, anyway. Dean is totally a bottom. ;P

I Got a Soul but I’m Not a Soldier by starandrea - Supernatural/Destiel - AU: Castiel is on the road (saving people, helping things) when he meets Dean and realizes that his soul is different - and not just because he's the pastor's son. - Here it is again, my favourite trope (well, I’d call it a trope, if there were more than a dozen or so fics for it). If you haven’t read RAIF, I’m wondering if you’ve caught on yet. ;P.

Chosen Man by Sineala - The Eagle/Marcus x Esca - The son of the man who lost the Eagle of the Ninth would never be allowed a first command of his very own fort, would he?//Marcus is posted not to Isca Dumnoniorum, but to a wretched and run-down garrison north of the Wall. There he finds that he is the new centurion of a group of scouts and spies, all of them British. He has few supplies and no experience. His men distrust him. His superiors despise him. His second-in-command is an incompetent drunkard. And the local tribes are determined to kill all of them.//But the worst thing of all is one of Marcus' soldiers. He is an enigmatic, dangerous, and insubordinate man by the name of Esca, who makes Marcus yearn for terrifying things he has never before wanted and can never, ever let himself have… - Sine pretty much engineered the Eagle fandom. 

I followed them from the Eagle and into all their other ventures, too, and when they started writing for Stony I practically screamed in excitement. PLEASE read their Stony, if it’s the only Stony you ever read.

The Leonardo Effect by Phoenike - Assassin’s Creed/EzioLeo - To Ezio’s best knowledge, Leonardo's idea of debauchery was staying up until morning with a bottle of wine and too many sketching supplies. But why would the gondolier have lied? It was a heavy accusation. In both Firenze and Venezia, mere allegations of unnatural conduct had condemned men to be pilloried or hanged. - My favourite EzioLeo fic of all time. Everything Phoe has ever written is a gem, but this one takes the cake. Have I said that already? A lot of cake is being taken. Please read. It’s the epitome of what makes EzioLeo good.

Naked to Mine Enemies by mundungus42 - Pirates of the Caribbean/Sparrington - The Pirate Code doesn't expressly command its adherents to repay debts that bridge life and death, but the Code is more of a set of guidelines, anyway. Sparrow/Norrington, set after At World's End, ignores all films released thereafter. - A classic fic for a classic ship. My ship pun both is and isn’t intended. I’d read this one over and over. Okay, I already do. Whenever I go back to Sparrington, I go back to this.

The Persistence of Iron by Sylvia - Marvel/X-Men Cinematic Universe/Cherik - Waking up in a lab with no memories and a blue-eyed stranger calling him by someone else's name is only the beginning of Erik's problems.- Sci-fi mystery. You don’t need to ask me to clarify at this point, do you? Cloning tech? CLONING TECH? DE-AGING CLONING TECH? So many favourite tropes.

Take the Heat Out of Me by quipquipquip - DCU/Jaydick - Lost Days!Jason trolls Officer Grayson!Dick in Blüdhaven. Dick counter-trolls with the power of love. (It's super effective.) - A classic Jaydick fic. I think it was quip’s last foray into fic. Under that name, at least. What a bang to go out with.

Don’t Quote Me by TKodami - DCU/Superbat/WIP - Bruce Wayne has weathered scandal before, and Wayne Enterprises can handle another publicity crisis. What Bruce can’t handle is one crashing up against his plans to infiltrate Lex’s estate. Set during Batman v. Superman. - There’s that more Superbat. I’m sure… one day… the author will finish it. It’s a goddamn sex tape scandal!fic. Glorious.

Speaking of, every Superbat fic by Liodain. 

In This White Wave I Am Sinking by queeniegalore - Generation Kill/Bradray - He felt like he wasn’t really living, like he was in an in-between state, something that came between war and real life, something like purgatory. - The atmosphere for this is consistently beautiful and bittersweet. 

Okay, that’s about it for now. Save for an honourable mention to one of the fics that I started off with in the SPN fandom. I’d honour some more, but most everything’s been purged at this point. Come on, 2012!fandom, stop hiding behind how “cringe” you think shit was. I want my fic back.

Pull Me Under by AwesomeDistractions -- a Destiel handprint!kink WIP.

And finally, the most honourable mention, the first slash fic I ever read, from the Pokemon fandom, of all places. Originalshipping horror/mystery!AU. Wow, my tastes have always been, well, my tastes. Believe it or not, best place I can find it is a Waybackmachine archive of a creepypasta uploading site that went defunct a while back. I never found out the original author. But here it is, Missing, the first ever slash fic I stumbled across.

If you guys want more, I can definitely provide more. I have thousands of bookmarks. These are just my very, very favourites. What ones are still remaining on AO3, anyway. This is why I save most in PDFs. Though there are a few completely lost to time, and I’m pretty sure the OTW says fuck you to Waybackmachine, which. Uhghgh. Please. I want my nostalgia rush back.

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

Let’s Read Comics! With Samantha and her Girlfriend :D

So, Avengers Endgame is out now!

Earths Mightiest Heroes vs the hordes of Thanos

With that in mind, we decided there was only one logical comic book superhero whose adventures we should cover today

The answer of course

Is Jimmy Olsen

Me: Superman should have suspected things would go badly as soon as Jimmy lured him down to that wine cellar

My Girlfriend: HOURS AGO!?

How much oxygen was in that tiny box

Me: Apparently enough that banging on the lid and screaming for help didn’t use it up

Our tale begins with…

Me: Not to be confused with his brother, the Pacifist MagnaMan

My Girlfriend: “What’s wrong with this picture”?

SO MUCH

Me: I feel like this barely scratches the surface of all the many, many things wrong with this picture honestly

My Girlfriend: JIMMY JUST TRIED TO MURDER A MAN

Me: He has a LOT of pent up rage

If you lived his life you would too

My Girlfriend: FAIR

I’ve seen what Superman puts him through

Me: True fact: when I first read this comic I genuinely thought the villain was called “Manga Man”

My Girlfriend: “The Murderous Manga Man” is a different story, about Jimmy beating up a homicidal 4Chan user

“At the Jimmy Olsen fan club one day, Jimmy presides as honorary chairman”

My Girlfriend: I’m sorry the WHAT fanclub

Me: This was a genuine thing in the silver age

My Girlfriend: Why

In the name of sanity

Is there a Jimmy Olsen fanclub

Me: To be fair, back in the sixties Jimmy did go on a fair few of his own adventures

Travelling in time to become Superman’s babysitter, becoming a giant turtle boy, meeting the Legion of Superheroes

He’s also Darkseid’s arch foe

My Girlfriend: Please tell me you are making some of that up

Me: The real question is how he’s only the “Honorary chairman” of his own damn fanclub

My Girlfriend: Even his biggest fans knew better than to give him any real power

The fanclub surprises Jimmy with happy birthday wishes and they’re not alone in this!

Me: This being Superman, he’s coated those letters with space radiation of course and Jimmy is slowly poisoning himself each time he touches them

My Girlfriend: I mean that’s what I assumed

This is the Silver Age Superman after all

Me: I’m genuinely curious about what the heck a “Mad Clock Maker” actually is though

And how and why Jimmy and Superman captured him

My Girlfriend: Metropolis can rest easy now that some MANIAC isn’t out there creating swiss time pieces

Me: “He put thirteen numbers on the face of it instead of twelve!”

My Girlfriend: DEPRAVED

Superman declares that he has to leave on “An important mission…I’ll be gone several days”

Me: “And on a totally unrelated note, your friend Clark Kent is using up some of his vacation days this week…he’ll be back in several days”

However Jimmy doesn’t have long to miss Superman as soon his attention is captured by “Princess Vannia of Duxannia” who declares she wants to join Jimmy’s club…

Jimmy’s reaction?

“A g…girl? A princess? And what a chick! WOW!”

My Girlfriend: Jimmy Olsen, World Renowned Feminist

Me: He has such a progressive way of thinking about women

My Girlfriend: A role model really

Me: This is starting to look less and less like a fanclub and more and more like a cult

My Girlfriend: THE OLSEN FAMILY

Me: I do admire Jimmy’s persistent dedication to remaining a lifelong virgin here though

My Girlfriend: He’s committed to ruining any chance he might ever have had of having anything approaching sex with another human being

Me: Like

For some reason, one that defies all logic, this woman has looked at him…a man whose reaction to a woman is “WHAT A CHICK!”…a man who surrounds himself with creepily smiling sycophants all dressed in identical bow ties and “Imitation signal watches”

And somehow her reaction is “TAKE ME I’M YOURS”

My Girlfriend: And yet Jimmy’s reaction to this is “DRAW ME A CHALK SKETCH OF SUPERMAN OR GTFO”

Me: It doesn’t matter how beautiful you are or if your Literal Royalty, if you can’t draw Chalk Superman then he doesn’t want to know you

Princess Vannia draws a Superman sketch but Jimmy notes she gave him a “M” symbol instead of an S

My Girlfriend: That’s because they have strict copyright infringement laws in Duxannia

Me: She does not want to be dealing with Superman’s lawyers

But no actually it’s apparently because in the Duxannian language Superman is called “MagnaMan” and so she “Put an M without thinking!”

“That’s logical!” Jimmy concedes

Me: I’m really not sure it is

My Girlfriend: “Not thinking?

It sounds like you’ll fit right in with this club after all”

We’re spared the rest of the Jimmy Olsen Fan Club Initiation which, I am just assuming, involves some kind of ritual human sacrifice and instead cut to later where

Me: Jimmy, a man who has been to space, back in time and to other planets is BLOWN AWAY by the sight of a slightly larger than usual automobile

My Girlfriend: “HOLY CRAP IT’S GOT WHELS AND SHIT”

Me: Good of him to remember he is supposed to work for a newspaper though

Less good that he’s forgotten he’s a PHOTOGRAPHER, not a journalist

My Girlfriend:  And worst of all is that he just uttered the words “Groovy Gas Burner”

Me: While Most Worrying is his comment in the next panel that if the car goes faster they “Might end up on Mars”

My Girlfriend: I do not think this man should be allowed at the wheel of a car

Me: VANNIA IS HAVING SERIOUS DOUBTS ABOUT LETTING HIM DRIVE

Despite Jimmy’s questionable knowledge of how a car works they do arrive at Vannia’s “Royal Jet” which she offers to give Jimmy a tour of

But once inside…

Me: Hours later, Jimmy awakens in a bath tub full of ice, minus one liver

My Girlfriend: STOP HOGGING THAT HEALTHY LIVER

Me: Other people need it too!

Jimmy tries to get free, only for a handy spray of knock out gas to render him unconscious, with Vannia noting that it should “Keep him quiet”

My Girlfriend: VANNIA JUST BECAME MY FAVAOURITE CHARACTER

Me: We really can’t blame her for doing this

My Girlfriend: This isn’t even a kidnapping, she just can’t bear the thought of having to speak to Jimmy Olsen for an entire twelve hour flight

Me: The best part is?

YOUR BASICALLY RIGHT

Yes, because as Jimmy awakens “hours later” he’s greeted by the friendly local monarch King Otgar who informs Jimmy that they are his friends, something Jimmy has trouble believing given the whole knock out gas routine

Me: Jimmy

I’m sure all of your friends have really wished they could spray you with knock out gas at least once

They just didn’t have the means to

My Girlfriend: Perry White is considering installing these in every cubicle at the Daily Planet

Me: Not to mention given some of the things Superman has put Jimmy through this is pretty tame

My Girlfriend: By Jimmy Olsen’s standards, these are the best friends he’s ever had

Me: Jimmy heroically threatens to have his invincible super strong friend beat people up for him

My Girlfriend: While also threatening the reigning monarch of this country

Me: I’m pretty sure there’s no US embassy in Duxannia to hide in after this Jimmy

Better get ready for a long stay in the castle dungeons

But when the caped figure descends….

Me: “Stop that godawful whining noise this instant!

AND TURN YOUR WATCH OFF AS WELL”

My Girlfriend: And yet, he’s still treating Jimmy better than Superman normally does

Me: Hasn’t tried to force him to marry an ape or anything yet

Jimmy declares “Your not Superman” in a truly startled fashion

My Girlfriend: The keen well trained eye of a seasoned photo-journalist at work

Me: He’d deducing this from such clues as the fact the man has different hair, a different costume and a different face

No this is in fact “Magna Man” and he declares that “My job is to assassinate the king!” which he promptly attempts to do

Me: Is it really a job?

We’ll find out later that no one’s paying him to do this

He just decided to all on his own

My Girlfriend: But “My hobby is to assassinate the king” doesn’t sound as good

Me: It DOES sound a bit less threatening

My Girlfriend: “I’m between careers right now so I’m just filling my free time with a little attempted regicide”

Magna Man grounds the plane with his “Muscle Power” and gleefully declares that with one punch “Duxannia will be the first country to put a king on the moon!”

Me: I have some concerns about the Duxannian space program

My Girlfriend: Sure they SAY their king was punched to the moon by a supervillain but many people claim they faked it

“Jimmy, can’t you save him?” the princess pleads

My Girlfriend: WHAT THE HELL DOES SHE EXPECT HIM TO DO

Me: “Jimmy quick!

Use your fantastic bow tie powers to stop this super powered killer!”

My Girlfriend: Why

If she wanted someone to fight a supervillain

DID SHE KIDNAP A PHOTOGRAPHER

Me: Seriously, she was in Metropolis

Why didn’t she ask Superman instead of his fricking sidekick?

HIS NON POWERED SIDEKICK

My Girlfriend: If Superman wasn’t available there are other heroes

Wonder Woman

Aquaman

Green Lantern

Me: HELL EVEN AMBUSH BUG WOULD BE MORE USE

And yet despite all logic and rationality Jimmy DOES drive Magna Man away!

How?

By turning the sound up on his watch and forcing Magna Man to flee in pain!

Me: This is not the first time someone has fled to get away from the noise Jimmy Olsen is making

My Girlfriend: It’s a fairly regular occurrence

With Magna Man temporarily frightened off, Jimmy not unreasonably asks for an explanation as to what the heck is going ON here

Me: So wait

There was no time to explain things to Jimmy

But there was time to partake in the Jimmy Olsen Fanclub Initiation?

My Girlfriend: “IF ONLY I HADN’T TAKEN SO LONG TO DRAW THAT CHALK SUPERMAN

I WOULDN’T HAVE TO COMMIT A KIDNAPPING RIGHT NOW”

Me: But clearly it was much more important to stop off and buy a bow tie and an Imitation Superman Signal Watch than it was to calmly and rationally explain what was happening to Jimmy

My Girlfriend: Also none of this answers the most pressing question: WHY KIDNAP JIMMY

Me: “Our country is in dire peril

And I’m being hunted by international assasins

Since I’m in Metropolis, home of the worlds mightiest hero, clearly there’s only one person I can go to for help…

Jimmy Olsen, cub photographer for the Daily Planet!”

My Girlfriend: THE HERO DUXANNIA NEEDS

After a ride to the palace in the Royal Limousine the king begins to fill Jimmy in

But we’re more focused on…THIS

Me: The Magna Man needn’t bother trying to kill the king

He’s going to be eaten alive by that wild animal he is petting like a housecat

My Girlfriend: Jimmy was astounded by the sight of a CAR

But the kings two pet leopards, those he’s nonplussed about

Me: “Ah yes just two leopards chilling in the monarchs rumpus room

Totally normal”

It turns out the astounding discovery Thork made was a SUPER POWER SERUM

My Girlfriend: So this guy

This random guy working in his lab in this weird ass country just

Stumbled upon the secret of SUPERHUMAN POWER

And that

Wasn’t international news?

Me: This kind of thing happened every other week in the silver age

After a while the media just didn’t consider it newsworthy anymore

My Girlfriend: “Fiftieth deranged crackpot this week creates Superhuman Abilities in a beaker”

How did Thork test this miracle discovery?

My Girlfriend: Handy of him to label his gophers like that

Me: That way they won’t get mixed up with the gophers he keeps around that AREN’T for super serum tests

My Girlfriend: Where is he getting all these gophers

Me: THE SORDID FACE OF ANIMAL TESTING IN DUXANNIA

How many dead gophers did it take to make this serum

My Girlfriend: A LOT

Me: Also “This quill pen was formerly used by many great scientists”

The

The same pen?

What did he buy it on eBay or something?

My Girlfriend: It’s been passed from mad scientist garage sale to mad scientist yard sale

Me: “it’s an honour to write my notes about experimenting on gophers with it!”

But his notes on his latest round of Gopher Torture are interrupted by the arrival of his assistant Klarz who rips the door off its hinges while wearing a superman costume!

“Klarz!

Why are you wearing that costume

And how could you rip open my vault door?!”

My Girlfriend: Damien Thork is not a very smart genius

Me: “I’m working on a serum to give people powers like Superman

And now my assistant is dressed like Superman and has powers!

…..

HOW DID THIS HAPPEN”

My Girlfriend: HE IS STUMPED

Me: BAMBOOZLED EVEN

My Girlfriend: Apparently the Quill Pen is mightier than the sword

Me: BABE TOO SOON

My Girlfriend: you’d think that Thark would have been a little more careful about who he employed at his top secret lab

Me: This story is actually a Cautionary Tale about the importance of background checks

My Girlfriend: Klarz cunningly infiltrated the lab by ticking the “No” box under the question “Are you a member of any underground terrorist groups seeking to assassinate the nations monarchy”

Me: THAT DEVIOUS BASTARD

Me: “QUICK, SOMEONE GET SOME GHAAA”

My Girlfriend: Thork took a LONG time to die for a man who was impaled to a wall

Me: Apparently getting a quill pen through the heart is much less serious than you’d think

My Girlfriend: “Actually we’re just kidding about that last part

What Thork actually said was “Tell Klarz this is coming up in his performance review”

“Magna Man will kill me unless YOU can discover his weakness Mr Olsen!”

“I see! You figured Superman’s pal could figure out Magna Man’s Kryptonite”

My Girlfriend: “GOD ALONE KNOWS WHY YOU THOUGHT THAT”

Me: So they didn’t bring Jimmy here to fight Magna Man

They brought him here

To solve a mystery left behind by a super scientist

….

THAT MAKES EVEN LESS SENSE

My Girlfriend: Maybe they know how Superman treats Jimmy

And assumed he spends most of his time daydreaming of ways to kill a man with Superman’s powers

Me: That is a logical assumption

My Girlfriend: “Your Superman’s best friend Jimmy

YOU MUST HAVE THOUGHT OF WAYS TO KILL HIM”                      

Jimmy gets to work and soon enough…

My Girlfriend: What kind of computer is that exactly

Me: And how the hell did they “Run this through it”

My Girlfriend: They just typed in gibberish and the computer displays HELPFUL GIANT LETTERS with the answer

Me: I don’t think this is a real computer

I don’t even think Thork was a real scientist

Just a lonely man with a depraved gopher fetish

But the next scene reveals…OH HORROR! The code they found was a fake, planted by a smirking Magna Man who is juggling some lead cannonballs

Me: PERFIDY!

My Girlfriend: HE HAS PULLED A CUNNING RUSE

Me: PERPETRATED A DECEPTION

With a plan so cunning anyone whose not a complete buffoon might be tricked for all of five seconds

“But what is your real weakness?” one of the other rebels asks

Magna Man reveals that even HE doesn’t know…Thork’s code really is uncrackable

“But as long as no one knows what can stop me I’m safe!”

Me: ….

No

No your not

My Girlfriend: What kind of sense does that make?

Me: “Ignorance is bliss” does not apply to things that MIGHT KILL YOU

My Girlfriend: What if his weakness is rain water?

Or flowers?

Me: He brushes up against a tree and then SUDDENLY DEAD MAGNA MAN

My Girlfriend: What if he loses his powers while flying?

Me: Oh just wait till you learn what his one weakness is

It’s so much stupider

Than both of your guesses

My Girlfriend: This is a silver age Jimmy Olsen comic

Of COURSE it’s stupider

Magna Man’s arrogant posturing is interrupted by Jimmy’s signal watch and a message in morse code from Jimmy challenging Magna Man to a duel

Me: Jimmy Olsen here like “MEET ME AT THE ROYAL BANQUET IF U WANT AN ASSKICKING”

My Girlfriend: Challenging him to throw hands

Me: Just look at all that opulence

I bet the regular people of Duxannia aren’t invited to this banquet

My Girlfriend: Maybe Jimmy is on the wrong side

Me: All Magna Man wants to do is help Duxannia become an autonomous collective

He knows that true executive power can only derive from a mandate from the masses

Not some farcical aquatic ceremony

My Girlfriend: BLOODY PEASANT

Magnaman soon crashes in, declaring he’s wearing a “Sound proof helmet” to protect him from Jimmy’s watch

My Girlfriend: That makes much more sense than just wearing earplugs

Me: “It took hours to make but it was WORTH IT”

Jimmy however threatens Magna Man with a lead sword…and the conniving Magna Man pretends to be struck down and weakened by it!

“No no…take it away…I feel pain…weakness…”

My Girlfriend: He apparently took acting lessons from Dr Smith

Me: “OH THE PAIN

OH THE PAIN OF IT AAALLLLL”

Magna Man flees the scene and…

Me: Not even saving the lives of the entire royal family is enough to get Jimmy past first base

My Girlfriend: She doesn’t care how many lives he saved

SHE HAS SOME DAMN STANDARDS

It turns out Duxannia doesn’t though because next thing you know Jimmy is being declared the Duke of Duxannia

Me: And that’s the true story of how Jimmy Olsen might one day end up Actual King of a Whole Country

My Girlfriend: GOD HELP US ALL

Me: “I hereby decree that any man woman or child caught outside without a bow tie

SHALL BE PUT TO DEATH”

My Girlfriend: Draw a chalk sketch of Superman or get one hundred lashes in the royal dungeon

A gloating Magna Man is…SOMEHOW spying on this ceremony…and laughs about how Jimmy won’t bother to look for his weakness now

“And when I’m through even Superman will thank me for deposing Otgar!”

My Girlfriend: Magna Man knows that Superman opposes autocratic tyranny

Unlike that prick Jimmy

Me: That or he just thinks Clark will be glad for him killing Olsen

My Girlfriend: He’ll have done what Superman’s been trying to do for years

Me: ALL COUNTRIES OF THE WORLD MUST CELEBRATE SUPERMAN DAY

SUPERMAN DECREED IT

That time he wore a Pope Hope and declared himself King of the World

My Girlfriend: WHICH TIME

Didn’t he do that more than once?

Me: You can kind of see how Lex Luthor arrived at the opinion that Superman is a Dangerous Alien Menace To Earth when you look back at these old stories honestly

So what is Superman day like?

Well get ready to find out…

My Girlfriend: What the fuck am I seeing here with my Own Two Eyes

Me: ONLY ROYALTY AND THE GREATEST NOBLES GET TO RIDE IN THE GIANT HOLLOW SUPERMAN-MOBILE

My Girlfriend: I Do Not Like This

Me: THE COLD DEAD EYES OF THE PARADE FLOAT STARE OUT AT THE CROWD

Searching for anyone not wearing a bowtie and imitation signal watch

My Girlfriend: So they can be put to death I assume

Me: Well of course

The princess wonders why Superman isn’t here yet and Jimmy signals him, saying he’s sure he’ll show up if he’s “Through with his Space Job”

My Girlfriend: “Space Job”

Is that a sex act

Because it sounds like a sex act

Me: it’s a sex act so filthy it’s illegal in nine galaxies

Superman does indeed swoop in and Jimmy fills him in on what’s been happening

Superman’s response?

“A rival Superman who wants to rule Duxannia eh? I’ll take care of MagnaMan later!

Right now I’ll do a super-feat to entertain the crowd! It’s a Superman Day tradition!”

Me: “A rival Superman plotting to commit regicide as part of a bloody coup, eh?

I’ll worry about that later!

FIRST I NEED TO SHOW OFF FOR THE PUBLIC”

My Girlfriend: It’s a TRADITION Samantha

You can’t ignore traditions just because they don’t make sense

Me: Your right I don’t know WHAT I was thinking

Clearly this is much more important than apprehending a superpowered terrorist bent on killing all who stand in his way

And so Superman seals himself inside a coffin which Jimmy promptly covers with digging equipment

“No other man could stay alive ten minutes without air!

But Superman will stay buried a full two hours and then crash return to the surface!”

My Girlfriend: So they’re just going to

STARE AT THE GROUND

For two hours

Me: TRULY THRILLING

My Girlfriend: A real feast for the eyes

Me: Superman can literally juggle tanks, FLY and shoot lasers from his eyes

But why do any of that to entertain the people when instead they can just

LOOK AT SOME DIRT FOR TWO HOURS

My Girlfriend: In complete silence

Me: Well of course

That too is a Superman Day Tradition

My Girlfriend: Superman!

You’ll believe a man can lay in the ground for 120 minutes!

But, as grim fate would have it…

My Girlfriend: So they didn’t think to include any way of Superman warning people if things went wrong here?

At all?

Me: How could BURYING A MAN ALIVE FOR TWO HOURS possibly go wrong hon?

Your just being silly

My Girlfriend: I have health and safety concerns

My Girlfriend: They waited TEN MINUTES to check if he was alright?

Me: “I’m sure he’s just trying to give us a little scare

that wacky scamp”

My Girlfriend: “HE’S PROBABLY FINE”

Me: “WHO COULD HAVE PREDICTED SOMETHING HARMLESS LIKE BURYING A MAN ALIVE MIGHT END BADLY”

My Girlfriend: Apparently all Lex Luthor needed to do all these years to kill his nemesis was sabotage the Superman Day festivities

Me: A MISSED OPPURTUNITY

Me: I’m a bit worried that physicians in Duxannia apparently conclude whether or not someone is dead by just pricking them with a pin

My Girlfriend: I guess now we know were that doctor from Night Nurse got his medical school diploma from now

Me: He took it to the next level though by also shining a pen light in peoples eyes

My Girlfriend: The Wonders of Tomorrow

Me: Jimmy meanwhile can probably be renamed “Oscar Bait” after that histrionic performance

My Girlfriend: He’s hoping to get cast in “The Death of Superman: A Superman Day Tragedy”

But who is that off-panel person addressing Jimmy there you ask?

It’s…Superman!

Specifically the REAL Superman, as he declares the dead one is an impostor “Wearing a face mask of me”

Me: HE CUNNINGLY PURCHASED A SUPERMAN FACE MASK AT THE SUPER MAN DAY TRADE SHOW

My Girlfriend: Sorry so no one

Not even Superman’s BEST FRIEND

Could tell this was just a rubber face mask?

Me: Clearly they got them from wherever the Master buys his

So who is this Super-Sham you ask?

My Girlfriend: I have

SO MANY QUESTIONS

Me: I don’t even know where to begin honestly

Let’s start with why the hell he glued an “S” over his “M” emblem instead of just

Wearing a different costume

My Girlfriend: NO

Let’s start by asking

How King Otgar

Who is the king of a nation that is an absolute fuckin monarchy

COULD BE ACCUSED

OF EMBEZZLING

HIS OWN GODDAMN TREASURE

Me: “THE KING HAS STOLEN HIS OWN TREASURE!”

My Girlfriend: “Should we…should we…stop him???”

Me: “Is this actually illegal?”

My Girlfriend: Also why exactly did this plan require him to pretend to be Superman?

Me: I really think we need to stop trying to apply logic to a silver age Jimmy Olsen story

My Girlfriend: I DEMAND ANSWERS

Me: Well then there’s the biggest question of all

WHAT KILLED MAGNAMAN

Now

Are you sure

Are you really sure

You want to know

My Girlfriend: Yes

Me: Are you REALLY sure

My Girlfriend: I am ready

Me: I don’t think you are

Because this

Is what killed Magna Man

My Girlfriend: ………………………

………………………………………………………………

YOUR MAKING THIS UP

Me: it’s right there on the page

My Girlfriend: NO

No I refuse to accept that this is canon

Me: Magna Man was killed

BY A ROGUE SUPER GOPHER

My Girlfriend: GOPHERS

NATURES KILLING MACHINES

Me: When all of humankinds guns and bombs failed to stop him

Magna Man was killed by that simplest of all gods creatures…the SUPER POWERED GOPHER

My Girlfriend: SO IRONIC

Me: Personally I saw this coming

My Girlfriend: No

NO YOU DID NOT

Also

Why the hell didn’t the super signal watch take his powers away too?

Me: Maybe it’s not super things he’s vulnerable to

Maybe his weakness is literally Just Gophers

My Girlfriend: Gophers were Damian Thork’s weakness as well

In a different

Much more horrifying way

Me: Stop that

A cheerful Otgar declares “Magna Man was a killer! He deserved to die! Without him the rebels can be easily rounded up!”

Me: “And we can put them all to the sword”

My Girlfriend: “King Otgar went on to commit the bloodiest most brutal genocide in the history of Duxannia

The Hague continues to seek Jimmy Olsen to stand trial for his complicity in Otgar’s horrifying war crimes”

Me: And that’s the true story of how Jimmy Olsen helped a tyrannical monarchy slaughter countless rebels by removing the only obstacle protecting them from the bloodthirsty Duxannian military

And how does this tale end?

Me: JIMMY OLSEN: CHEATING BASTARD

My Girlfriend: Cheerfully thinking about how he made out with another woman behind his girlfriends back

Me: WHILE PLANNING TO CHEAT ON HER AGAIN

My Girlfriend: Lucy is being a bit charitable in her description of this issues tale as an “Incredible story” as well

Me: Personally I just love how she has to add the disclaimer “Probably” when she says that Magna Man was the “Only supervillain ever killed by a gopher”

My Girlfriend: She knows what kind of universe she is in

Me: She knows what the silver age is like

She knows better than to assume this is the only gopher related fatality in its history

Final Thoughts

My Girlfriend: Was any of this

ANY OF IT

Ever brought up again?

Me: Continuity did not really exist back then

Except when they decided it did

My Girlfriend: So it was like Marvel Comics is today?

Me: EYYYYYYYY

But yes seriously the fact that Jimmy Olsen is like…fourth or fifth in line for the throne of a whole country was NEVER DISCUSSED EVER AGAIN

My Girlfriend: Literal royalty

And yet he still has to work a minimum wage job

Me: Jimmy really does not come off well in this story and it only gets worse when we find out this whole time he’s been cheating on his girlfriend

My Girlfriend: His expression in that last panel is a thing of horror

Me: Still this comic taught us some good life lessons:

Don’t get into royal jets with princesses you just met

Don’t employ people without a mandatory background check or they’ll kill you with a quill pen

My Girlfriend: DON’T GIVE GOPHERS SUPER POWERS

Me: yes

That is the most important

Most relatable lesson of them all

[nightskywonderer]

Do you think, that Wonder Woman trying to completely change Superman's life (giving up his secret identity) is a sign of a great relationship?

Wonder Woman never tried to change Superman’s life nor did she want him to give up anything. What she wanted was for him to be whole hearted honest and truthful within himself. She believed that he was hiding himself out of shame for who he was, an alien who happens to look human. Diana celebrates life in general and her culture. She isn’t the Goddess of Truth for nothing and there is a reason why Superman always confided in her most of all. Diana saw, embraced and accepted all of who Kal was before he could do that himself. She supported him and pushed him to not hold back.

Was it okay for him and Lois to have a relationship based on lies for more than 50 years and call that love? Clark was still hesitant to share things with her. They also lied to the pubic as reporters. Lois only married him once she knew he was Superman. Never ever did she just marry Clark Kent without ever knowing he was Superman. He lied to her for decades and he even tried to give up his powers, acted like not being human wasn’t acceptable and a burden for her. Clark also never goes ape shit crazy or evil if Diana died. So being with her never cripples him, unlike Lois. He is defined by needing to be romantically linked, sleep with only one human to stay supposedly true to himself than being a noble moral man. That is complete BS. That is not a relationship that is admirable. It’s dysfunctional and character assassination.

As far as I know, for most of their incarnations, Clark never lied to Diana and Diana never treated Clark Kent like shit. Diana learned why the secret identity was important to Clark and she then adopted her own as Diana Prince. Clark learned how to be more honest, open and confident, not so strict on privacy and whine because he isn’t in his comfort zone. It’s called having balance, communication, understanding, and growth in a relationship, learning together. Being 100 with the person you are in a relationship with but also most importantly, with and within yourself from jump is what makes a great relationship.

[waezi2]

Top 5 villain/hero moments

Number 5: Captain America tells Crossbones that he could change.

Long story short: Cap has 24 hours left to live. So he tries to do all he can to tie up loose and say the goodbye to a couple of people... Including Crossbones, probably the most dangerous henchman Red Skull has ever had.

But why is it that Cap wants to see this piece of human scum? To tell him that he honest to god believes that Crossbones is not beyond redemption.

No, I’m not kidding.

Cap is a man so good and optimistic that he believes that everyone can chance. As long as they live, they can chance for the better. And he is spending some of the little time he has left to tell Crossbones that.

The result is to be expected:

Yeah, Crossbones is not gonna change.

Don’t get the wrong idea, Cap KNEW that Crossbones would laugh at him for suggesting that he should redeem himself. But he still wanted to tell him, letting him know that he didn’t think he was beyond that.

Number 4: Roy Harper and Cheshire at a seafood restaurant.

Green Arrow’s former sidekick is probably most known for his daughter he had with one of the most terrible women of DC Comics: Cheshire.

Roy and Cheshire has a difficult relationship to put it mildly. They are enemies, they share a wonderful child and, in their own twisted way, they love each other as much as two people who find themselves in someone-is-about-to-die situations when they meet can love another.

I think I will let this quiet moment speak for itself:

Number 3: Daredevil hates Kingpin for not killing Foggy.

Daredevil ended up in jail once. After Matt Murdock’s secret identity had been officially outed, he was sent to prison which was absolute hell for the blind lawyer. And it didn’t make it any better that his best friend Foggy Nelson was murdered when he came to visit him. Matt believes that it is Kingpin who arranged the death of Foggy and decides to kill him for it once they have been moved to the same block, Matt gets a homemade knife and mentally prepares himself for the last confrontation.

But it doesn’t go as planed. You see, he MEETS Fisk... who tells him that he DIDN’T kill Foggy.

Somehow, that makes it worse. Matt KNOWS that he isn’t lying thanks to his senses, and so does Fisk. And he rubs it in his face.

See how not-scared that fat bastard is? That is the face of a man who manage to mock you by NOT killing your best friend, laugh at your misery and make you form an alliance with you anyway since he is the only temporarily ally you have in a prison filled with people who wants you dead.

Number 2: Spider-Man and Green Goblin berates each other.

Marvel Knight spider-Man is my favorite Spider-Man story. It is about everything that makes the wall-crawler great, including his relationship to his most hated enemy; Norman Osborn AKA Green Goblin.

Osborn arrange it so that aunt May gets kidnapped, his enemies gets an upgrade and donates five million dollars to the Daily Bugle so they can use it as reward to whoever that can bring the newspaper information about Spider-Man’s true identity. All to ruin Peter’s life.

When they are about to confront each other on the same bridge where Gwen Stacy died(just as frosting on the cake of shit Osborn made for Spidy) Goblin mocks our hero for being intelligent, yet not making money of it, instead settling with a job as school teacher. Peter calls bullshit on Osborn, telling him that he could have cured cancer by now if he had used is genius on something useful instead of being a super villain. And how does the Green Goblin respond?

That’s the main difference between Osborn and Peter Parker: Osborn doesn’t give a rat’s ass.

Peter and Osborn are both men of science. The difference is their relationship to their passion. Peter has a “great power great responsibility” philosophy, so he sees it as his responsibility to do something useful with his scientific knowledge like using it in his crime-fighting career as well as teaching school children about his passion, hoping that they will share it and be scientists as well when they grow up. Osborn sees science as something he can use to control others and abuses his knowledge to be a god among insects. The rest of the world can burn as long as he gets it his way.

Number 1: Lex Luthor realizes that Superman is Clark Kent.

Lex Luthor actually became a god once.

And with his newfound omnipotence, he kidnaps Superman who is powerless against him and decides to torment him.

See, the thing is that Lex always thinks of Superman as this alien who does not belong on his planet and most defiantly does not deserve to be praised and loved. Lex believes that Superman secretly looks down upon normal humans and can’r relate to simple mortals. But after Sups dares Lex to use his new powers to learn what true sorrow means to him, old baldy is in for a surprise:

That’s right, Lex finally finds out that Superman is Clark Kent... And BOY OH BOY does that make him furious!

Knowing that Superman, a man who is not human, had the perfect family he never had is just too much for the most famous DC villain of all time. That this alien got to be Clark Kent is practically a crime. Lex thought it was impossible, but he hated Superman much more than he had ever before.