#just know the shitty ones are the ones i made lol
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Make The Neighbor's Know My Name - ERWIN SMITH x F! READER SMUT
MDNI 18+
What happens when your hot, (divorced) older neighbor just can't help himself?
wc: 5.5k (sorry!)
cw: SMUT, porn w plot, Modern!AU, age gap, mentions of shitty fathers, DADDY KINK (again, sorry i just know he has one), cursing, p in v, oral on both ends, squirting, general nastiness, breeding kink lol
a/n: wow had sm fun writing this. also this may be tmi scroll if u dont care but shoutout to the dude who made me s****t for the first time i was reminded ab you when writing this, hes a whole dad now lifes crazy
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Erwin Smith is an established man. He has a nice house and a good job-one where he got his hands dirty and worked his way up for years before becoming the boss. He works out on a weekly basis, eats (somewhat) healthy and can (again somewhat) cook. He is clean and well kept, educated and respected in his community. Kids love him, so do dogs and the elderly. With a politeness often associated with much different times and a beautiful, piercing set of blue eyes, he is damn dear perfect. On all accounts-a wonderful man.
So, it puzzles many that he lives in such a nice four bedroom all alone. It was not always like this; he used to be married. Had a sweet little housewife that got to stay home and do what she pleased. But it seems that freedom got to her head, overzealous with how much she could get away with-unfortunately it did not take many years of marriage to understand that it was never going to work. All it took was Erwin working a few months of overtime to push her into the arms of another man, one she claimed would give her more attention than he ever did. Perhaps he had neglected her a bit, let his job take over his life for a while. But it was all for her! So, they could have even more stability and possibly even become ready to start a family.
Nowadays he thanks God they never had a child together. And after the dull ache that was getting cheated on, the divorce, the court process that ensued afterward-the man was convinced that he was better off alone. He could accept that truth. There was no need to go chasing a feeling he had already experienced.
But that is not to say that he does not get any action. He is a man after all and they have needs, he surely does. He is no stranger to going out and chatting up nice women, taking them out on a few dates and making them feel special only to break it off when things get serious. It's a pattern at this point. His friends (employees) tell him he should drop the good guy act and just fuck shamelessly. Skip the formalities and go straight to the good part. Just be honest, it is arguably better than whatever the hell he is doing.
He considers it for about a week, even thinks about downloading an app so the opportunity is always there at his convenience. He knows he is a good-looking man who has much to offer, the matches will certainly come in.
That was until he becomes distracted by you. A cute little twenty something that moves directly across the street from him. He watched from both the windows of his home to the security camera which conveniently already faces your house. You had a few other younger girls helping you, two guys and neither seemed to be your boyfriend so that was a plus. And when he left to go get drinks, truck keys in hand-acting like he was not staring directly at you behind the shade of sunglasses you were bold enough to be the one to utter the first word.
It was after a few giggles of your girlfriends, who were also checking him out, but he was more focused on you. Hoping it would indeed be you that was moving in. "Hi neighbor!"
One of the girls slaps you lightly, mostly surprised you were actually bold enough to call out to the hot dilf across the street that's probably married. But he waves and says hello back before stepping into the large truck and driving off. They laugh as you stand there for a while, the wheels in your head turning.
You've always had a thing for older guys.
You soon come to learn he is not a dilf but the sentiment is there. It begs to argue the question, does a man really need to have a child to be a dilf? It may be in the title, but you see it more as a state of mind. And you also learn that he is divorced, he lives alone actually. Except for the golden retriever you often see accompanying him on runs.
You can thank the nosy old lady that lives next door for all of this top-secret information. It reminds you to accept her invites inside for tea often, you feel like you've met the whole neighborhood thanks to her gossip.
For the first month and a half your interactions with the man are mostly basic. Friendly 'hello's' and small little waves before the two of you leave for work in the mornings.
The first time you have an actual conversation is when you are bold enough to knock on his front door one Sunday morning. You know he is awake because he has already gone for his morning run. The sight of your new sexy neighbor all sweaty in his compression top and gym shorts has now become a part of your weekend routine. You wouldn't miss it for anything.
His hair is wet from the shower he just finished, still slightly dripping onto the thin material of his shirt. You swallow hard, trying to not get lost in the sea of muscle staring straight at you. You look up at him. He is more than twice your size.
You want to climb him like a tree.
"H-hi Mr. Smith so sorry to bother! I heard you own a construction company and well-I have this stupid door coming off the hinges! And I'd do it myself, but I suck at stuff like that! And I'd hate to hire someone to come all the way out here for something so small" You are visibly nervous, fidgeting and playing with your hands as you find it hard to maintain eye contact. He is just so fucking hot you cannot trust yourself to not gawk at the sight of him. "Of course, I'd pay you too!"
You are so cute and helpless. A fucking door hinge? Surely you have at least one friend who could help out with something like that. But as you soon come to learn, Erwin Smith will never say no to you. "Nonsense, no need to pay me. I'm always free to help a neighbor out. Let me go grab my tools"
So, he does and follows you across the street. He definitely does not check out your ass in those tiny little shorts that lift up a bit when you walk. In your defense-it's your day off, you deserve to be comfy!
Your house is exactly what he expected it to be, cute and tidy. It smells nice and everything is so girly. Pink and creme colored decorations scattered about, shiny hardwood floors that he can tell you recently cleaned. Perhaps it was in preparation of him coming over. Of course, the door just happens to be the closet door in your bedroom, with all of your cute little clothes as you sit on your cute little bed and watch.
Fuck, for some unknown reason the man finds it hard to focus. Even as you make small talk, his mind is elsewhere. Stuck on the sweet smell of you, the way you sit looking so pure and innocent-legs dangling over the edge of the bed as you watch him, head curiously cocked to the side.
He feels like a pervert for imagining what you must do in that bed. How beautiful you must look in the mornings when you wake up feeling lazy, stuck between the sheets. Do you cuddle up with the singular fluffy stuffed animal at night? Do you take it off the bed before you fuck someone, or does it stay up there? Even more, how many men have you fucked in that bed?
He forces himself to snap out of it, silently scolding himself for being so crass. This is not very neighborly of him. You would likely be disgusted by his vulgar thoughts. Or maybe you would like it, you don't do much to hide the way you stare at him. Even before this day, it was quite obvious that you had a little crush on him.
Yet as the older, more mature adult in the situation he tells himself that he must not entertain the idea. He is eighteen years older than you. Children have been born and graduated high school in that amount of time. It's downright wrong and these intrusive thoughts need to be put to an end.
It was easier said than done, especially when he catches a glimpse of your pink lacy panties thrown about the closet. He thinks about the underwear for the remainder of his day, if he were a less respectable man, he would have pocketed the pair and took the home. But he would never, he only imagines he did.
Two days later you show up to his doorstep, with a nice homemade lasagna and the sweetest smile on your face to thank him. It is you that he wishes to devour instead. He even invites you inside to talk for a bit but keeps things fairly short. He considers opening up a bottle of wine but talks himself out of it. Remember, he promised himself he would not entertain the idea of you. Although it may be too late because he fucks his fist to the thought of you every night for the remainder of the week.
And one early morning at work, before any of his men have been sent out on jobs a few of them congregate around his desk. Engaging in small talk as they usually do, telling stories of girlfriends, wives, how drunk they go the other night, cars-the usual guy stuff.
"Boss! How're the apps treating you?! You get any action?" Eren, one of his younger employees cannot help but ask seeing as he was the one to suggest in the first place.
"For real! You haven't said shit since we made you download it" Connie walks in, hardhat in hand as the other one holds the phone his crazy girlfriend is currently blowing up. He ignores the calls and shoves it into his back pocket. "Don't hold out on us man I tell you everything!"
"I'm aware" Erwin cocks a rather judgmental eyebrow-there are many stories which would have been better off unheard. Things he would much rather forget.
And then he thinks of you-the only woman which has plagued his thoughts for close to two months now. He sighs, contemplating if it worth bringing up. His heart drops as the realization dawns on him that you are practically the same age as the two young men before him-younger actually. "Shit" He sighs, running a hand through his hair. "There is...a woman. Not from an app, my neighbor actually"
"Ohhh your neighbor! So, you get to hit and just walk right back home?" Connie laughs and the man cannot help but roll his eyes. These two are definitely the wrong people to be discussing this with.
"We haven't done anything; I just find her attractive is all. Probably not the smartest idea to fool around with someone I run in to almost every day anyways"
"Why not? Saves you money and gas" Eren argues. "She live alone too?"
Erwin sighs because he has neglected to mention the most important detail. "Yes, she lives alone, apparently she inherited the house from her aunt"
"All I hear is a lonely lady who needs some company" Connie shrugs, taking a sip of his coffee. "What's stopping you?"
"She's quite young"
Eren and Connie could not be more excited that their usually reserved boss is opening up to them for once. After all of the talking they have done, it is his turn to ask for advice. "Erwin Smith you smooth motherfucker" The shorter man teases. "How young?"
"Last year of college young"
The men all but gasp, smiling excitedly as this is the juiciest piece of information they've heard in ages. They never would have expected it from a man who (with all respect) has a constant stick up his ass. "Younger than us?"
"......yes" He sighs ashamedly as the men whoop and holler. Rolling his eyes as they dap each other up as if they are the ones about to get laid.
"You better do it boss! Chicks these days are crazy. We can thank your generation for being such shitty fathers" He should expect such ignorant comments from someone like Jaeger, a guy who has been stringing his girl best friend along since childhood.
"Forget I even said anything" Smith stands up, grabbing a clipboard and few other necessities for the job site he will soon be off to. But he should know the two young men would persist.
"I say do it boss!" Eren encourages, pumping a fist into the air. "Do it! Do it!"
"Do it! Do it!" Connie joins in on the chanting, they follow the man out his office-ignoring the stares of their fellow colleagues. That is until their boss scolds them to get the hell to work. So, they do, retreating back to their trucks as Erwin stands in place in thought for a while.
They have given him much to think about.
He ponders the conversation for days afterwards. Every time he looks at you, when you have those short little conversations that keep his day going. Perhaps it would not be so bad, he hopes you aren't looking for anything serious. Or maybe he does, his mind remains undecided. It would not be so bad having a pretty young thing like you on his arm. But he is getting ahead of himself.
He talks to you more, striking up longer conversations whenever he gets the chance. You are very polite; he finds it sweet the way you cross your ankles and tuck your hands behind yourself whenever the two of you speak-almost as if you were nervous. For some reason, it makes him want you even more.
After weeks of much of the same behavior he decides he has had enough. It's not so bad, it's not like he knew you before you were an adult or anything. You are a grown woman who pays bills and provides for herself-you have your own house for Christ's sake! He needs to stop babying you, looking at you as if you are just some lost little girl. You have needs of your own. Needs he is more than certain he can meet. So, he invites you inside for drinks one Friday evening, you do not think about it for even a second before agreeing.
Sending a text to your girls about how you are finally going to fuck the hot man from across street, you shut off your phone. You want absolutely zero distractions during your visit, a plan of your own is in the works.
You drink his fancy wine and watch a movie on the couch, carefully maintaining a bit of distance between the two of you. You almost forgot how nervous he makes you, perhaps the liquid courage is what you need to get your act right.
"Come closer" He pats the spot beside him, and you hesitantly follow his orders, setting down the wine glass and closing the gap between the two of you. Your thighs are touching, hands awkwardly stuck on either side of you, the pace of your heartbeat quickens when the man slides an arm down and around your waist. "What's the matter? Am I making you uncomfortable?" He has to make sure before things go any further. Your stiff body language is telling him that perhaps he should slow down.
"Oh no! Never!" You shake your head, trying to ease into his touch. But you are still afraid to touch him yourself. "It's just......you're a bit intimidating"
He exhales a puff of air through his nose, clearly amused by your words. Brushing a piece of hair behind your ear, he speaks again. "Oh darling, I don't mean to be. What can I do to make you feel better?"
His deep voice sends shivers down your spine, it sends shivers somewhere else too. "I-I don't know" You laugh. "You're just so big and..... established. Have no idea what you're doing sitting here with a girl like me"
"Oh, don't say that" He turns his body a bit to face you better, arm still stuck in its place around you. He places the other hand on your knee, you remain painfully aware of its place. "I'm the one who should be questioning how I got such a pretty little thing sitting on my couch" You giggle, it makes him twitch in his pants. "I'm the lucky one here"
His hand slides up to your thigh, massaging the fat in a way that makes you burn with desire. A heat builds deep within you. "T-touch me please"
Oh, your sugary voice is driving him crazy; he had no idea he would be this into something like this, someone like you. He pulls you into his lap, hands dragging up and down either side of your body as he takes all of you in. He lets out a long sigh, hips shifting beneath you as his cock begins to harden at the feeling of your burning skin. He hooks his thumb beneath your shirt, looking up at you. "May I?"
You nod almost frantically before he pulls the fabric over your head. Facing a baby pink, lacy bralette-he is unable to stop the groan from leaving his lips. He kisses the uncaged skin beneath your breaths, inadvertently taking a deep breath in to get more of your syrupy scent. "You wear this for me?" He questions.
You nod shyly, trying to hide your face but he pulls it closer to look at him. A hand guides you to fill in the space between your faces, foreheads pressing together but he does not kiss you. Not yet anyways, he wants to tease you a bit first. "Use your words"
"Y-yes I wore it for you daddy" It was a shot in the dark, most men his age are into shit like that.
He groans again. Fuck. Eren was right, thanks to all the shitty fathers out there, yours included.
You laugh, finally gaining that bit of confidence you need to keep the teasing going. "Wanna see what else I put on for you?"
"Show me darling" His eyes follow your hand which goes down to unbutton your shorts, unzipping them a bit before hooking your thumb to pull them forward-giving him perfect sight of the cute little bow which sits atop your panties. The same pair he spotted in your closet all those months ago. If he wasn't hard before then he definitely was now, nearly bursting at the seams of his pants. And he chuckles, twitching in anticipation as your body rocks with his. "You planned this, didn't you? Dirty girl"
"Mhm" You laugh, hand running down his chest, you let your nails dig into the fabric of his shirt a bit. You are desperate to feel even more of him. "Did I do a good job?"
"So good princess" He confirms, kissing your chest again. "Let's go upstairs"
You agree, making sure to grab your shirt that you clutch to your chest, painfully aware of the fact you are the only one without a shirt on. But your worries are soon dissolved because Erwin sheds his own shirt the second the two of you reach his room, you sit on his large bed, taking him in all his glory. Your mouth practically waters at the sight of nothing but muscle and evidence of years of hard work, the dirty blonde happy trail you wish to see the end of.
He walks up to you, standing at the edge of the bed and you look up to him. You are eye level with the tent of his pants. He brings a hand to gently caress your face, words are not necessary to know what he wants. You're so sweet and obedient that you go to fumble with the zipper of his pants almost immediately. And when he springs out you have to stop your eyes from widening at the sheer size of him. You almost feel afraid again but you don't want him to know that-you seem naive enough already. You'd like to surprise him a bit.
You kiss the girthy tip as if it were his lips, sticking out your tongue to flick over the slit. You press an exaggerated closed mouth kiss to the tip before taking more of him in your mouth. He groans, throwing back his head as you make your way down inch-by-inch. When you reach the base you swallow, throat tightening around him as he looks down to watch you-mouth agape.
Your wide eyes look up at him gleefully, if you could smile you would. The wait for him was sooo worth it-you think as he looks down at you in what seems to be pure amazement. Brows scrunching as he groans as you choke on his length. A mess of saliva and tears as you bob your head up and down, you can feel when his tip makes it past a certain place in your throat, growing conscious of how deep he is reaching.
It hurts but you can't find it in yourself to stop, he looks so good. An absolute mess as his manly groans make you want to play with your pussy. But instead, you take it a step further, you need this man to remember you, to crave you for years afterwards just in case this never happens again. Although you hope it does. You wrap both arms around his thighs, bringing him deeper as he begins to fuck your mouth.
Erwin, who has stayed relatively quiet since then becomes a mess. "Ohh fuck-fuck! So good, gonna fuck this tight little throat.... good girl, good girl"
You moan at his nasty words, sounds of gagging and wet slaps play like a symphony. Until he pulls back once he realizes he was about to blow a massive load down your throat. No, he wants to save it.
He pulls out, strings of spit dripping from his cock as you gasp for air, wiping away the tears from your eyes and mess of liquid around your mouth. "Mmm" You moan. "Was it good daddy?"
"So good darling" He rubs his thumb over your now swollen lips. "You're doing such a good job for me"
He leans down to kiss you, finally. Fervently grabbing at your hair and hips as he makes his way onto the bed. You scoot back, lips never leaving his as he goes to pull off your shorts. Tongues pressing together in-sync, he stops for a moment to suck on yours-eliciting a small whimper from you. Your nails trace up and down his arms, lost in the feeling of his lips. You could stay this way for hours.
But he obviously would like to keep things going, pulling down your shorts all the way before going down to kiss you through the thin fabric. He makes out with your pussy through the lace, stopping to suckle and blow tiny bubbles on your throbbing clit.
"Fuck!" You squeal, bucking your hips into his face as he continues the teasing. His tongue going up and down, creating an even larger wet spot that takes up most of the area. "Pleeease daddy"
"No, you can wait" He scolds, going to kiss your thighs softly. "Be patient. I'd like to take my time with you, get you ready for my cock"
"Mhm" You nod yet your hips buckle up again. "S-sorry"
"It's okay princess" He coos, finally pulling your panties down completely. When he licks a stripe up your pussy you all but scream.
"Mmm yesss!"
He kisses your clit, sucking it before swirling his tongue around the sensitive bud. Your hips try to fuck his face, he lets it happen, diving deeper and deeper into your pussy. He sticks his tongue out and shakes his head side to side, moaning at the way you cry out-so receptive to his touch.
He moves down to fuck you with his tongue, you bump your clit against his nose, mouth open and eyes rolled to the back of your head in a pure state of bliss. You tug at his hair roughly, using it to guide you against him, so desperate for more. Your mind clouds with pleasure, mouth forming into an 'o' shape as your hips begin to stutter, breath catching in your throat. And when he pulls back to spit! on your pussy, not once or twice, but three times you think you have died and gone to heaven. With the addition of his fingers, and focusing the attention back to your clit, it is not long after that your release washes over you.
You exclaim out loud as your back arches off the bed, softly buckling down onto his tongue as he laps up all of your essence.
The both of you are panting as he comes back up to meet your lips. Tongue assaulting yours as you taste nothing but yourself on his tongue. That's the way it should be-you think. His painfully hard length presses into your stomach, you look down to see how deep it might go inside of you, but you look back up again when you start to feel scared of the stretch. You trust him, that is all that matters.
And before he can even ask if you want him to put a condom on or not, you grab his cock, sliding it down your folds and circling it around your clit. "Want you inside now daddy"
And who is he to ever say no to you? Seconds later he is pressing himself inside of you, thankful that he prepared you for it beforehand because it doesn't take very long for him to bottom out. "Ohh shit" He groans, pulling all the way out them slamming back in. "Fuck...you're so tight"
Your walls squeeze around him even more at his words, arms settling around his broad shoulders as you fight the urge to let your hips run away. He notices the way you pull back; he won't allow it. Bringing your bodies flush against one another, he rests his forehead on your shoulder, strong arms pulling you down onto him. You cry at the pressure, the way he is stabbing at you from inside, so deep you feel it might go out into your tummy. You squeal again, legs crossing over his back. "Erwin! Mmm, no no no, it hurts"
A stray tear falls from your eye, yet your hips begin to seek out his as you grow more accustomed to the stretch. "F-fuck" Your stomach begins to flutter.
"Oh shh shhh darling it's okay" He sounds so gentle, the complete opposite of the mean snap of his hips. "You want me to stop?" Another powerful thrust makes you let out a noise closer to a scream.
"No daddy please don't stop" You begin to claw at his back as he sets himself a pace, loud sounds of clapping begin to fill the room.
Your pussy is choking him, so slippery and needy. It sucks him in with each thrust, a 'slush' noise every time he pulls himself out. "So wet" The man gasps at the sight of all your juices splattered about. He needs to see more.
Pushing your knees into your chest and angling his hips a bit higher, he begins to drill into you at an unrelenting pace. A mix of saccharine moans fill the room, the sound of his headboard slamming against the wall. "Oh, oh oh! Erwin! Mmmm!" You sound so perfect, the sound of you moaning his name alone is enough to make him want to cum.
"Feels sooo good" Your eyes roll to the back of your head as he plows into you in a way that feels mechanical. In a way you have never felt before. He is so experienced, he knows all the right buttons to push, places to touch you and kiss. You are so mind numbingly stuck in a state of bliss that you almost feel lost. Like you could never crave another man after sleeping with him.
"Guys your age ever treat you like this?" He questions, now forcing your legs together with one arm and picking your hips up off the bed. Continuing his assault on your sweet little pussy that has made him go fucking stupid. He usually maintains a sense of composure when sleeping with new women, he knows what he enjoys may not be everyone's cup of tea but you, well you are the most perfect little slut he has ever met. "They fuck you this good?"
"No Erwin!" You cry out, gripping the sheets as he continues slamming into you. "You're the best! Fuck, Erwin! It's tooo much, feels weird"
Your hips twitch, he knows very well what this means. Oh, he needs it, he needs you to squirt all over him or else he will not be satisfied. "Erwin! Erwin!"
"Yeah, keep talking princess, make all the neighbors know my name, huh?" He goes down to toy with your clit, your hips attempt to squirm away. But the arm wrapped around your thighs ensure you stay in place. He pinches your clit, tip pushing against your g spot in a way that makes it hard to speak.
"Nonono, think I'm gonna pee" You shake your head frantically, trying to grab his arms and free yourself of his grip. But he will not allow it.
"Just let go" He orders, hair now sticking to his head as he shakes it back and forth. "Squirt all over daddy princess, I'll clean it up"
You finally reach your breaking point, breath so caught in your throat that your moan is almost silent, too high pitched to even be registered. Your hips and thighs are shaking, stomach quivering and you can feel your heartbeat in your pussy as he does not relent with his thrusts-close to a release of his own. When you squirt all over him, he whines stuck on the juices gushing out of you. His eyes squeeze shut as the image replays over and over again in his head, finally dropping your body back down to the mattress as he is almost where he needs to be. "Such a messy pussy" He moans into your skin, your body lays limp as you try to do something as simple as breathe.
It is hard when he snatches every little gasp out of you. But you can feel him twitching inside you, thrusts grow sloppy as you grab at his hair, your sensitive pussy being pushed to her brink. "Please please cum inside daddy. Fuckkk I need it! Wanna keep it inside all night and remember how good you made me feel"
Your dirty words are enough to push him over the edge, spilling into you and splaying your womb with his seed. Fuck, his dick belongs inside of you. So does his cum, he wants to do this every day when he comes home from work. In the mornings before he even gets out of bed. At night when before he goes to sleep. He wants you stuffed with him at all times. His cum spills out of you as he finally pulls out, dripping down your thighs.
He looks up at you with a mischievous look on his eyes. It feels unnatural to see such a composed man come undone, the way he eats you up with his eyes.
And you are staring at him like he is the most handsome man on the planet, well he kind of is. To you at least. You chuckle, you're in danger, never has a man made you feel this good before. He made you squirt the first time sleeping with you. Fuck, you're dickmatized.
"We should have done this a long time ago" He collapses into your chest, kissing whatever skin is available softy. He will clean you up in a bit, for now he needs to rest.
"Yes, we should have" You play with his hair before kissing the top of his head, making yourself quite comfortable in his sheets. You could get used to this.
And used to it, you become. Erwin is now a daily part of your routine, the same as sleeping and eating. Getting creampied by Erwin Smith was now the highlight of most of your days but it was not all purely physical. He took you out a few times, you even met a few of his coworkers one night over drinks. You spend the night at each other's houses and begin to go on morning runs together.
You suppose you should not be surprised when you end up pregnant several months later. Knocked up by your sexy older neighbor that you now consider to be your boyfriend. He even suggests the two of you get married, but you agree to wait for the baby to come along to see if that changes anything in your relationship.
Now, because of you, he will live up to his true potential as a dilf.
#erwin smith#erwin x reader#aot#aot erwin#erwin aot#aot x reader#aot smut#erwin smith smut#attack on titan smut
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I have so many thoughts about this, lol.
Regarding the question "did Percy do anything wrong?":
I think, it depends heavily on what he did under the Voldemort-regime. Which we know nothing about. The only time we see him during that time period, is when he steps into an elevator, sees his father and flees. The next scene is him joining the order in their final stand against Voldemort and his Death Eaters. At that point, he had already tried to get out and made contact with the resistance via Aberforth.
Did he help the Death Eaters before that point? We don't know.
Did he engage in some form of resistance? We don't know either.
If Yaxley kept him as an assistant to Thicknesse, he probably had ample opportunity for both. But canon is completely silent about that. (Thankfully, in my opinion.)
Regarding the family situation:
It's okay to go low or no contact with your family and I think we should normalize that.
The whole row and its fallout is just a shitty position to be in. This was pretty much a scenario, where Percy could not "win", no matter what he did.
Firstly, there was the pressure from the ministry. The investigation regarding Crouch Senior was still ongoing, at that point. I do not think that Percy was really at fault here. Or, to be more concrete: There were so many people who fucked this up, Percy doesn't even make it into the Top 10.
This was his very first job. When Crouch got put under the Imperius, Percy had the job for a month, maybe two. (Maybe. He left Hogwarts in June and started working under Crouch in July or August. Crouch got attacked between August 19th and September 1st.)
Percy probably had no training in "How to notice that my superior was put under the Imperius curse". Partially, because most of his (known) teachers in Defense Against the Dark Arts were shit, and partially, because Crouch probably did not train him either. Additionally, he had little to no job experience and probably didn't know Crouch very well either. I would also assume, that Imperius!Crouch assured him that everything was normal and he shouldn't worry about it.
So no - I'm not surprised that he didn't notice.
I am surprised, however, that other people didn't notice this either. Including: Cornelius Fudge (Crouch was one of his department leaders, they should've been in regular contact throughout the year), the other department leaders (they, too, should've been in regular contact), the senior employees of the Department of International Cooperation (same) and the administration staff (because they probably keep track of when which employees are reporting sick and for how long). Arthur could've noticed something, too. While he had no regular contact to Crouch, he had regular contact to Percy - and as far as we know, Percy did not shut up about Crouch. He worked for the ministry during the first war, he could've easily recognized warning signs his son didn't.
So ... yeah. That's a lot of people. And no-one, literally no fucking one, went "Hm, haven't seen the head of the Department for International Cooperation for weeks/months. He's only ever sending his assistant, who's barely out of school. Weird?" Really?
Yeah, no.
I don't buy that. This could've worked, had Crouch been a lowly employee of a small bureau like Arthur Weasley or something. But a department leader? Nope. There were a lot of people who just decided to look the other way.
That said: The ministry is still corrupt as hell. Had this investigation really decided to "do something about it", they would've fired someone. And that someone wouldn't have been the one most responsible, but someone who was easy to replace. Probably Crouch Senior's new assistant. Percy.
Secondly, as you said, Arthur suggested that Fudge only promoted Percy so Percy would spy for him.
That's a really shitty situation. And it doen't really matter whether he thought that Percy willingly spy for Fudge or whether he thought that Percy was simply to dumb to notice. It just shows that Arthur doesn't trust his own son.
And there was no way to disproving him.
I mean, what was Percy supposed to do?
Reject the promotion? Considering how petty Fudge is, that would've gotten him fired in retaliation. Especially with the pending investigation. Which would've ruined his career. And not just his career within the ministry. (Because really, who would've employed someone who failed to notice that his superior got put under the Imperius and who was fired for it? No one.)
Accept the promotion and stay with the family? Arthur would just have kept distrusting him, and the rest of the family probably would've joined in. (If they really thought that Percy was willingly or accidentally spying on them, they would've treated him accordingly. Could be everything - keeping information from him, lying to him, excluding him from family meetings, making snide comments, maybe kicking him out, when he got suspicious enough. The things you do, when you believe that someone is spying on you.) This would've only caused more arguments and more hurt feelings down the line.
Or ... he could've left.
That way, there was no possibility to spy on his family. It also removed him from a situation, where everyone around him distrusted him and treated him like a would-be traitor.
So, leaving was probably the best option. For all of them.
Additionally, kids just don't go no contact with their parents over a single argument. Usually, they tend to stay and try to ignore what upsets them, until they reach their breaking point. And this was Percy's breaking point. It's understandable, that he struggled with his family's (and especially Arthur's) reputation. And we don't really see Arthur supporting him, either. (Quite the opposite, considering how fast he jumped to accusations.) It's also understandable, that he struggled with the family's lack of money. (Note: I would not call this poverty. I know, the narrative tries to frame them as poor, but Rowling fails miserably. They look like a family struggling not with poverty, but with bad spending habits.) And while his siblings were vocal about this (especially the poverty-bit), he didn't voice his discontent for ages. He probably would've kept it that way, if not for the row.
And regarding "but he hurt his family members by not coming back and the stuff he did to Molly!"
Yeah, no shit. There was no reason to go back.
Voldemort being back didn't change anything about the spy-accusation. They could've easily kept that shit going. Especially, if we consider that Scrimgeour (unlike Fudge) did use Percy against his family.
And Molly? She didn't try to resolve the conflict. All she did was trying to guilt-trip him into coming back, while ignoring his boundaries. Going back to appease her would've just brought him back into a situation, where he was treated like an outsider (and a would-be traitor) anyway. Other than that, it's Arthur who needed to step up here, and it's telling that he didn't. (He didn't even apologize at the end of DH, which does not bode well for their relationship in the future.)
I feel like when I say I think Percy didn’t do anything wrong people don't really understand what I mean
Being wrong and doing wrong are not the same thing
He was wrong about Voldemort not being back but leaving his family was not a wrong action he didn't just leave for no reason it had very little to even do with Harry imo
He was going through alot of stuff and things were turning around his hard work was being recognized his career was not over over something he hadn’t even had any control over
just for his dad to say he didn't trust him and that the only reason he'd ever get promoted is to spy on them
Like why would he stay after that?? I think him leaving was inevitable tbh if it wasn't this I would have been something else
I think he will always leave eventually
Not even going into that no I don't think being upset at your parents for not wanting more money to better take care of seven kids is wrong
He was mean about it but everything other then Voldemort being back he was right about
I know people bring up the letter all the time too but like Harry did continuously get Ron hurt so I actually see it as pretty sweet that even after falling out he's worried even if he should have known it would only make things worse
sending the sweater back and closing the door in Molly's face were not wrong if you make it clear you are pulling away from someone and they keep pushing your boundaries it's not on you to comfort them
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Thinking about the song "Ship in Port" by Radical Face and clones
Thinking about the line "Farewell to the chains we were born into" and what that can mean for the clones
Thinking about how "But I have always stayed in place/Under that old illusion that it's safe" could equally describe Hunter, Echo, and (s1+2) Crosshair's complete opposite approaches to the Empire and post-war life.
The way Crosshair clings to his identity as a soldier of the Empire
And Echo as a soldier of the Republic
But Hunter puts his identity as a soldier behind him
Crosshair fights for the Empire to gain purpose
Echo fights against the Empire to save his brothers
And Hunter decides the Empire is too strong to even try to oppose
"A ship in port is a safer one"
"but it's not the reason it was made"
"So forgive me if I wander off"
"And forgive me more if I just stay"
Thinking about what The Bad Batch could have been if it had more fully explored the differences between those ideologies
(Thinking about what The Bad Batch could have been if it had dedicated more screen time to the 'reg' clones within the Empire and the underground network's fight to free them , instead of just sidelining Echo and Rex for a hypothetical clone rebellion show we might never get)
#i have lots of thoughts and many draft posts in which i've been struggling to figure out how to word those thoughts#tbb had SO much potential#it was so close!#it really could have been on par with Andor if it has just tried#i feel like i'm projecting these themes that aren't really there#the pieces are there the show just didn't focus on them#i considered saying hunter 'hides from the empire to protect his family' but that never included crosshair just omega#so that felt like giving him too much credit#ignore the music video i just really love the acoustic version bc MMM that viol!#the rest of the lyrics totally fit for clones of this era too btw#like SO WELL ugh#if i had the time resources and attention span I'd make a music video#maybe someday...#(lol i have waay too many projects stuck in my brain and also the new semester started and i'm already so behind rip)#while we're on the subject of radical face and clones#“always gold” is THE perfect heartbreaking Kix song!#tbb#tbb analysis#sw tcw#tbb echo#tbb hunter#tbb crosshair#arc trooper echo#the clones#radical face#bardic musings#sorry i didn't credit the gifs#this has been in my drafts since long before i knew people care about that and i can't find where i found them from#just know the shitty ones are the ones i made lol
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i realized they had the same birthday (dec 21st) so i was like "yoooo i should draw them together"
silly bonus:
#my art lol#vocaloid#vocaloid fanart#utau#utauloid fanart#utau fanart#根音ネネ#nene nene#nene nene utau#oliver vocaloid#oliver vocatone#oliver maghni ai#i guess??? because that's his maghni ai design? chose it for fun and for color/composition purposes ig (slightly more yellow? and details)#don't know how to tag this... and since yuki only appears in the bonus doodle idk if i should really tag her#i don't actually know if oliver would be scared of nene or not aksjhgk that little guy doesnt seem scared by most things#but i just thought it would make for a funny side doodle so thats why its there lol#potential successor to the kagamines/iku doodle? in a way maybe... i should find more vsynths that share bdays and draw them together#fun fun fun... ofc its not the exact same day and year like tho iku and the kagamines tho (which is crazy); nene came out in 2009#but ya. showing penance in some way because i was too depressed to draw anything for oliver's bday last year lmao 😭 im sorry my boy#i mean i did do that shitty short meme video which i almost completely forgot abt but that doesnt counttt im talking art piece#this piece was gonna look way more different originally but i couldn't get it to look right so i went for something simpler#cause i was running out of time... and also experimented a little since this one's weird in that i did the colors first rather than lines#then did lines based on the colors and cleaned up the coloring after. and i was gonna add some more stuff to bg but got tired rip#so yeah maybe its a bit simple for my liking but im too tired to redo this again. i had to resize it bc i accidentally made og file huge#and it just wouldnt upload to tumblr lmaoo so apologies if the quality got crunched#IVE BEEN WAITING ALL FUCKING DAY TO POST THIS AND THE OTHER SHIT HAHAHAHEH... i couldve scheduled them but NOOo... oliver day
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"There are moments where [Juan] manipulates other people in a similar the way they’ve been manipulating him. The scene between Jeremy and myself with the dagger is a last ditch frantic attempt at trying to win [Rodrigo] over." Do you think Juan was genuine in the knife scene? Do you think he would have killed himself? "Yeah I think so. He always does what is true inside him...It wasn’t simply about the eventual confrontation, but all about the richness of this twisted family make-up."
#top 5 scenes that changed the trajectory of my life#it's also the 1st time we see juan vulnerable (2nd time is his final scene where he confesses to ces about how messed up he is all his life#“we were betrayed father!” maybe if ces put his jealousy aside and helped his lil bro by letting him know about ludovico's army#he's so broken and tired. trying so hard to prove he's useful but he has a shitty luck and a jealous megalomaniac big brother#like even from a military stand point ces could've helped juan with the forli mission but noooo he wants juan humilated!#anyway. look at rodrigo being soft to his baby boy!!! he loves him immensely and trying to comfort him :(#david and jeremy not getting their emmy nominations doesn't sit right with me ngl#“i defend this family with my heart and my soul” i was really rooting for juan so bad because he was just a kid and he was Trying#it's why the people who view juan as some sort of villain are hypocritical and need to fuck off the show btw <3#like he knows he's a fuck-up and the circumstances made him a fuck-up. no one gave him a damn chance. just ganging up on him lol#juan borgia#david oakes#jeremy irons#rodrigo borgia#the borgias#theborgiasedit#perioddramaedit#about juan#juan and rodrigo#by jen
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this whole thing being abt rage is also really interesting. I feel like it comes up so much in fiction as a motive because it's the one emotion that's unifyingly restless while everything else can be petrifying, and just personally nothing hits like impotent rage for me, esp. with teen characters, esp. with characters whose rage is stoked by Someone Else to further that Someone Else's cause. like you'll have done all that in a bout of passion and when you're done you look around you and nothing has changed. those sentiments don't get quelled by being satisfied. righteousness withdrawal is a horrible thing to intentionally drag someone into, least of all just some kids.
#I think Ive brought my personal experience into this whole thing lol but yeah just.#the ratgrinders read so much like radicalization to me. or you know just. high control group recruitment#and I've seen that one time brennan brought up uhhh conservatism? and where people come from with that#that quote of his thats like. before youre a fascist youre a bully. like extreme sentiments take root on specific soils#and that's like a higher level than what we're talking abt here lmao it's fake fantasy high school role playing#but yeah just like. the simultaneous understanding of the grift working on these kids bc they already think a certain way#and also the other part that is no matter what the way that they think is not. conducive to them being happy#like yeah a nasty person is nasty to be around! but that also means they're often isolated#which makes them even easier prey for people who want to use them#fhjy coming out in The Current Climate makes that connection so apparent too lol like#me hearing abt the rage god: oh so like twitter#for the record of course I Dont Know if this is a read that's intended by the show#but it maps well onto my experience with radicalization/decentralized cult#Ive just. been thinking abt the rat grinders in those terms ever since I made the connection#like. you're accomplished and high level and such. is this sustainable? have you done anything For Yourself#or has everything you've done so far been coerced out of you by someone else's sweettalking#anyways if I can run porter cliffbreaker over with a car I would. and I'd reverse on him too#truly thats the highschool trauma as well as the grown man with niblings talking lmao#nothing gets me more mad than a shitty teacher#not art
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god i will never stop fawning over how absolutely SPECTACULAR afo vs bakugou was. genuinely one of the best fights in the entire manga in terms of art, the themes, the pararells, the gayness, the fight itself, and just. everything about it makes me wanna scream into my pillow and chew on it
#MIND YOU this was the fight that made me interested in afos character#ugh like i shouldve known bakugou was gonna take on afo ... like i knew him and izuku were gonna take on shigafo#cus of the whole win to save save to win thing#and its perfect for shigafo cus yk!#but i didnt know tomura manage to break free out of afos grasp early on#(which srry tomura for not having faith lol)#but yeah pitting bakugou against the guy was fucking amazing#like theres so much layers to it#like first off making bakugou(and izuku) fulfill the save to win thing by rescuing all might from afo#like how all might did in the kamino arc with bkg but this time bkg didnt'end' all might he was the one who saved him#AND THE FACT THIS WAS FILMED TOO JUST LIKE BEFORE#BAKUGOU WOULD NOT BE KNOW AS THE ONE THAT ENDED ALL MIGHT BUT THE ONE THAT SAVED HIM#AND FUCKK bakugou and afo.......amazing foils seriously#boys with gifted powers but one grew up with almost nothing and the other grew up with love#they both turned out shitty but only one of them actually changed for the better#afo in a way is like bakugou past self. hes fighting on what he couldve been if he let his ego take hold on his mind#and no bakugou did not solely defeat afo himself . and god my boy is so grown he KNOWs if it werent for everyone elses effort#he wouldnt be able to take this bitch down#bakugou i love you so so much#you are such an excellent character fuckkkk#and afo...... well you see what happened to him. fitting end to someone who thought highly of himself#died in a pathetic subpar way. fighting an injured teenage boy lmao#OH AND SAID TEENAGE BOY THAT LOOKS LIKE HIS OLD NEMESIS LMFAOOOOOOOOOOO#ive said this before but bakugou is afos karmic incarnation#i CANNOTTTT wait for volume 40 to drop. possible dawn of quirks era content afo character page (please) and yoichi/kudou colored by hori?#bakugou katsuki#mha all for one#mha manga spoilers#OH AND bakugou telling afo to shut the fuck up!?!?!?!?!?!?!? AND PROCEEDS TO BEAT HIS ASS IN 3 DOUBLE SPREADS????? MY FUCKING GOAT.#dahlia.txt
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CAMPBELL BAIN U MEAN EVERYTHING TO ME I LOVE YOU!!!!!!
fun extras since this took me FOREVER!!
anddd finally, here's a playlist of the music I listened to while working on this! it's definitely not my usual tunes but I swear I was just so much more productive and better at drawing him when I switched to these hahaha
#🎶I wanna hold ur haaanddd I wanna hold ur hand🎶#I didn't even know I could draw like this??? campbell bain you've made me a better artist#TRACKPAD ARTISTS FOR THE WIN!!!!!#I seriously don't think I would've been able do this if I hadn't used my school's shitty mac laptop to draw it lol#smth smth about how low the mouse sensitivity is combined with how bloody hard you have to press down plus low expectations#also ik they're not actually all that accurate but I just wanted to try smth new while still havin fun#campbell bain#takin' over the asylum#takin over the asylum#bloody hell why does this fandom have three separate tags for one show#I'm only usin the first two THERE IS NO G LOSERS!!#takin’ over the asylum#<- I'm actually about to lose my shit WHY IS THERE TWO OF THE SAME TAG WTF!!!!!!!!!!#I hope you can feel my absolutely bewildered outrage over this issue#I clicked on that thinkin it was the first tag#it was NOT#campbell bain fanart#takin over the asylum fanart#my art: oil paint pawsteps 🐾
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hey guys can I be honest with you I always thought the "try in spanish" comment was really funny but I got so many angry anons about it on my main I just conceded and pretended to think it was a bigger deal than it was
#lilly talks#f1#las vegas gp 2024#look it was a shitty ass race and as a 55 girly I was very upset about *waves hand* everything#but like#idk I giggled when he said that lol#they're two white millionaires!!!! why should I actually care about that!!!!#I need to stick to my guns about stuff like that bc sadly I do let my opinions be influenced by others#when is fine in some contexts#but I don't think it's necessary when it's about a snide comment made in the heat of the moment from one white millionaire to another#I just don't like controversy#but who knows#new sideblog#new beginning#new lilly?#I might be about to become the most problamatic person on f1blr that there is
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i love every wave of tumblr discovering that minecraft youtube has just been 90% insane fucking roleplays for the past decade. like hi new people from parkour civilisation. there’s literally hundreds of series you can check out now. have fun. everyone is equally insane about them and draws gorgeous renaissance art for them. they’re extremely addicting. i have not played minecraft in a decade but i am stuck watching these cubitos.
#like if you only know about mcyt bc of vaguely knowing the dsmp exists. one the dsmp is actually like that#it’s made by a shitty person yes but like it very much was similar just less edited lol people liked it for similar reasons#but also. this is just how mcyt is and has been at least since shadow of israphael. they just do this.#they’ve been doing it for decades. have fun with this fact! you will never escape#it’s really funny seeing people treat parkour civilisation as baffling when stuff like this has existed since I was a kid.#glad you have been introduced to peak (YouTubers writing insane machinima that makes you cry)
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Can I offer you a nice egg in these trying times
#transformers#bumblebee#shitpost#my art#euca's art#more like euca's shitty doodles LOL#I made this in like 3 minutes just for the meme#if you know where the line comes from you're a real one#you may be entitled to another egg if you can tell me#no promises tho#LOL
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I know it’s probably just my age and I’m Too Young To Possibly Get It and You Had To Be There but I’ve always kinda rolled my eyes whenever people talk about how joss whedon was some titan of nerd media and everyone loved his work
avengers came out when I was 13 and I thought that was. all right. at the time, everyone on the internet was nostalgic for firefly, so I watched that and found it extremely underwhelming, and wasn’t interested in seeking out more of that writing. but it is inescapable huh
#was gonna post this on my main but i have way more followers there and also what inspired this was#reading gaider’s post about alistair lol#yes we can in fact tell he was inspired by buffy#the part where he’s like ‘yea he’s persona non grata NOW but he used to be the shit’ citation needed lmao#and it’s always made me kinda roll my eyes#he’s fine. i like him as a character. but everywhere i go there’s been whedon worship#and now that he’s fallen out of grace people feel like they need to do penance for it#when i’ve. never understood it in the first place lol#obviously i’m one person and my opinions aren’t universal either but#i feel like everyone who talks about it is like ‘yeah he’s shitty BUT it’s good’#i guess you had to be there#but when i say i don’t like him now it sounds like im lying or just joining the people who are canceling him#hipster moment. i didn’t like him before it was cool#it’s just the writing style. i’ve talked about it a little before on my main#it’s especially insidious still in SFF novels bc once again. they’ve all seen buffy and firefly and#i remember my older sister liked angel but i’m p sure she had a crush on him#when will i finally be at the age where the things i grew up liking are the influence behind the Hot New Thing#i mean i know the issue is that the things i liked as a kid weren’t popular then either lmao#like i’m sorry but one man from 15 years ago cannot be the sole pillar of an entire genre#people need to diversify their influences and/or we need to let other people write stuff#honestly whedon’s style feels like he was going for american terry pratchett but it’s like. a little mean spirited about it#personal.txt
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ngl i've been dealing with burnout for nearly this entire year and the goddamn hurricane Did Not Help but by now it's shifted to this very weird flavor where i'm like constantly rotating drawing ideas & full fics i want to write in my brain & Really Wanting to work on them but then once i get as far as opening sai or google docs i just go "hm. dont wanna"
#trousled rants#i'm blaming my shitty freshman year of college idc. started so strong and then my second semester gave me 13 well-researched essays........#fun fact if any college freshmen are reading this & also still learning to navigate freshly-diagnosed disabilities um. dont do that#a lotta ppl can handle it fine but im a new media major bro im not built for that shit. i am getting a degree in shapes and colors#anyway this is mostly me explaining why i've been so inactive lol. obviously helene did A Number but i was already smoldering before that#i'll get back to ebony eventually.....i'll update napstabot eventually........i'll get back on the atbb refs grind eventually..............#i actually got as far as finishing both sf bros & moving onto stretch since i last worked on em. but i have to redo him bc i dont like ittt#the pose wasn't working w me and the small changes i made didnt give him as strong of a silhouette as i thought lol#there's also a oneshot idea i've had in my brain long enough to know exactly what words i want to use to describe certain specific details#i know precisely how it starts and how it ends and how i'll transition from one thing to another and how to make it all connect#and i have not written a single sentence 👍#blah blah u get it another update from my wambulance#at this point i'm just annoyed about it more than anything ngl#may things get So Much Easier in 2025. or god help me i will make it everyone else's problem
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I'm actually still in shock my partner and I saw Laura Jane Grace last night for the second time and after the show she came to the merch booth to hang out with everyone and she talked to my partner immediately and just gushed over their battle jacket (which they were feeling very self conscious about earlier and regretting that they didn't wear a different one) and my partner was just smiling in total shock all the way home
#GOOD SHIT GOOD SHIT!!#it was a really good show. small venue filled with other trans people#and my partner did get a picture with ljg lol#sometimes you meet your idols and everything goes perfectly well!!!#my partner was feeling SO shitty about their jacket before. it was the first one they ever made#and it's a little bigger on them than their others. they've made.... 5?#anyway the fact that ljg came right up to my partner and told them how much she loved their jacket..!!!#i love ljg too of COURSE but i know how much she means to my partner#seeing them just beaming and hearing them sing makes my fucking heart burst#also they decided to start E again on their own because of last night's show. stuff is good.
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Just here to tell you how strong you are for dealing with these Drantis, they are the worst of all, and I don't understand why they keep bothering you in this aggressive way.
I blocked many people to avoid interacting with them in the future, and I can't understand why they keep going to fans and their spaces like this.
They are truly a bunch of bullies and you are so strong to keep being calm like this Bleue
Here, virtuals Hugs on your way
Aw thanks, most people haven’t been too bad, from what I’ve heard there are some really nasty people out there I have been lucky enough to dodge… perhaps I blocked them in September lol. I think the most recent ask might have been the most aggressive I’ve received or maybe I’m just tired of the same points being made, either way I kinda “crashed out” didn’t I lol. Oopsie. Anyways, thanks for your support, very much appreciate it. Nice to not be the only one frustrated with the drantis. :)
and yea… it is strange to see them invade spaces or go to fans where people clearly disagree, like they really are itching for a fight huh. Like as many posts as I’ve made it’s weird they’d come interact with me because I’m certainly avoiding all the innitors and drantis on my end. There’s no point to reason with people who have proven to be unreasonable.
#it’s certainly easier to stay calm when people are not being aggressive… but also I just try to not take it personally#besides y’all don’t know how much I’ve yelled about things to my friends lol… but I’ve been posting not to change minds but just spread#awareness… not one should feel like they sre manipulative and evil just for being autistic or having adhd#so I’ve just been trying to get that message out because I used to feel that way and seeing that said so publically everywhere would have#really made me feel shitty…#<3 <3 <3 hope you’re doing okay :)#hello there#as an aside I know I write a lot of words but I feel like if you are going to try and argue or disagree or come at me you should probably#read what I’ve said… then again a lot of people couldn’t be bothered to get context for clips or watch the vids or videos so nvm lol#… seriously if I get another aggressive ask about this topic I might just can an index of links for them lol XD
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hate hate hate the feeling of turning in a part of an assignment and being hella embarrased abt how it is :3 like, feeling someone’s just gonna email me like ”hey?? what the fuck ??? what are u doing here this is garbage” like yeah dude i dont know what to tell you, things did not go well this week
#doing one that’s like a bigger thing but has weekly deadlines#and this week hasn’t been good for that so it’s like very fucking pathetic of how little I got done#and it’s all basically shit anyways like i know it doesn’t work and won’t work with the way I’m going about it#also I’m only submitting the previous version bc i don’t even fuckin know what’s going on with this current one#like the code’s all bad and all over the place and I have no clue where i’m trying to go with it#so it’s like i basically didn’t get shit done this week#only made myself more confused#i need to take a step back and like really fuckin think what I’m going to do with this bc it’ll just get worse if I just keep trying to go#with this shitty thing i have on my hands rn#and also im like over an hour late already bc gotta write a weekly report and idk what the fuck to say like#’’oops sorry dude it’s shit rn i have no clue what’s going on but also dont have anything i could ask help with bc im too confused so it’s#just uhh this thing now; a mess <3’’#the way i’ve been handling this course like ?? uh oh will i ever have the audacity to step a foot to my campus ever again lol#yes im now writing this to procrastinate writing that weekly report thing#ughhh yes im hella positive rn all is shit#(also there was parliamentary election today and it didn’t end well so that might be why everything feels 5x more shitty rn)#april 2023#2023
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