#just had to deal w a real asshole i hate to say it but he rly was

[yunogf]

.

[bratphilia]

would it be a bother to ask for a fic w a tomboy reader and william afton? ive been on such a kick w william afton x reader fics here since i watched the movie and i love all of them but i am not feminine in the slightest so if you could write one id be so grateful!! and age gap and size difference too would also be sooo 👌👌👌. thank you so much!!!

note ✧.*‎ this was a lil hard for me to write considering im on the girly-er side so if anything looks weird in relation to the premise i apologize in advance!! also so sorry for getting this out a lil later than promised.

pairing ✧.*‎ steve raglan / william afton x reader

cw ✧.*‎ age difference (reader is 18-21, william is 45-50), degrading, spanking, approximately two slaps to the face, blow jobs, rubbing through jeans? idk what to call that, coming in pants (fem)

taglist ✧.*‎ @dilfity

synopsis ✧.*‎ while attending yet another meeting with your career counsellor, he has a few choice of words for you.

jeans (w. afton x reader)

you sit in mr. raglan's office, trying to sit straight up, legs crossed, not bouncing. he slightly shifts in his chair as he reads your file, moving his spinning chair from side to side, as he mentally scrutinizes your report. it's nerve-wracking. anyone in your shoes would feel this way, but the way he's intently reading over every little detail makes you squirm.

the worst part is, this isn't even the first time you've been in this exact position. it wouldn't be so bad if mr. raglan wasn't such a hard ass on you. always practically demanding answers of why you keep getting let go from the jobs he gives you, criticizing the tiniest details. nothing gets passed this guy, and yet here you are.

(there's something that almost riles you up about the way he talks to you, though. he has a habit of talking with those big hands of his in a way that makes your insides twist.)

"so you sit here in front of me..." he pipes up suddenly, looking at you then lifting a brow, "wearing jeans to a meeting, for christ sake, asking for yet another job, so what? you can get 'let go' again?"

"well, yes," you say, a little dumbstruck at his comment on your attire.

mr. raglan laughs shortly. "i got news for you, kid. people with your kinda track record don't exactly find jobs as easy as you think they do."

you hold back from rolling your eyes. your fists clench at your side angrily. you speak through gritted teeth, "look, i just need a job. i'll take anything, i'm desperate."

"hate to break it to you, but things just don't work like that—"

you've had it. "will you just stop being such an asshole and give me my damn options already?! i didn't come here to be lectured."

you're seething, breathless from your outburst. your heart is pounding but nothing can beat the jaw-slacked look on his face. there's a deafening silence that has you on the edge of your seat. then, shortly, "you come here for advice, and i'm giving it to you."

you want to say something again, you open your mouth to do so, but he raises a hand to silence you promptly. "you said you're desperate, hm? want my real, useful advice?"

you stare at him, not liking the direction of this conversation or his weirdly tone of dripping malice. "get the fuck on your knees then."

it's hot, you'll admit it. and he's the whole package too, total dad-i'd-like-to-fuck and all. this isn't your type of deal, but if he's gonna offer it to you, fuck it, you'll take it. you'll take everything this man gives you. "mr. raglan—" you say, purposefully furrowing your brows, trying to act scandalized for godsake—

"get your ass over here," he scoffs with a roll of his eyes.

you shut up, perking up at that, and make way to the open space between his legs. "look at you, you degenerate thing. on your knees for such a cause."

your head swims and the buzzing between your thighs becomes far too apparent to be ignored. but you're willing to wait for that relief. you part your lips expectantly, hoping he'd get the message to undo his pants and he just laughs at you. "filthy fucking thing wants my cock in her mouth so bad."

"uh-huh," you say, mouth still open.

he does away with all the restraints and guides his cock into your mouth. eagerly, you take him and lick up the underside of his dick, eliciting a groan from him. he makes a fist around your hair and guides your mouth up and down his cock, not caring about what you can and can't take and you fucking love it.

the noises of him hitting your gag reflex is music to the mouth of your ears. the way you push him out only for him to slide back in is truly a marvel. and the grunts, groaning, and degradations that come from him makes you want to take him even faster, more than what your body can handle, and he just laughs it off, commenting on much of an "eager, filthy thing" you are.

when you feel his helping hands thrust your mouth more erratically is when he decides to pull you off. he uses your hair to stand you up and practically shove you against the desk, back facing towards him. you yelp in pain, only adding to the ache in your stomach. he stands to his full height and you gulp. fuck, he's so much bigger than you, of course he can just throw you around like that. when you ask him if you should remove your clothes, he pauses for a moment, thinking. then, mischievously, "no, i want to make good use of those jeans."

curiously, you look back at him, but his fingers are pressing against your clothed pussy. he presses hard, letting the fabric grind on you. "oh, fuck," you moan.

"yeah? you like that?" he asks gruffly, rubbing your clit through your pants from side to side. usually this stimulation wouldn't be enough, but fuck you were so hot for him that you didn't care. "fuckin' dressed like a boy," he scoffs.

tears burn in your eyes, partly from his words, the other part from the stimulation. then he slaps you across the face. "i asked you a fucking question."

"yes!" you cry, moving a hand to rub at your stinging cheek. he grabs your hand and then slaps the other side of your face, just for fun. a few tears slip down your face at his physicality, but doesn't change that fact that you, "love it so much!"

"think you deserve to come?" he asks. "after that shit you pulled. you think you deserve it?"

you sniffle, knowing damn well what his answer's going to be. "well, i don't."

he removes his hands then promptly wipes them on his pants. you sob out, grasping for his hands but he pushes off of you. "you better come back with a better attitude if you expect anything more than what i gave you."

[eclecticqueennerd]

Bad Idea Right?

*inspired by the song ‘Bad Idea Right?’ by Olivia Rodrigo.

*Language, smut, violence, breakup, alcohol consumption* Billy Butcher x reader

It’s been a few months since you left the boys. The direction Butcher was leading the group was a surefire plan to get you all killed and you wanted nothing to do with it. Convincing Butcher to take a moment to mull plans over instead of going in guns blazing was a tall order, one that ultimately made you decide that a relationship with him was not worth your life. You tried to convince the rest of the gang to leave but all that got you was a bunch of noes and a broken heart. Butcher, even with all his asshole ways, held your heart in his hand and it hurt to walk away from him. At least you have Annie keeping you company.

-Wyd 2nite?

Tearing your eyes away from the TV as you lounged on the dingy bed of your motel room Grace Mallory stashed you in, you typed out your response to Annie.

-nm, u?

-wanna meet up w Kimiko n go out?

-yass!

You and Annie meet up with Kimiko just outside of a nightclub. After you gather and exchange hugs, you go in and begin drinking and dancing to the heavy bass playing on the stereo. Multicolored lights flash all around you as you allow yourself to succumb to the party atmosphere. After the song ends, the three of you spot a booth off in the corner of the club and make your way there, stopping at the bar to refill your drinks. The three of you catch up. Annie was still in Vought Tower, Kimiko still working with Frenchie and The Boys. Kimiko gives a recount of how everyone else was doing in the group, including Butcher.

‘He really misses you.’ Kimiko signs. ‘We all really miss you. You should come back.’ You shake your head.

“No, I think it’s better for me to stay away. Butchers gonna get someone killed.” You could feel vibration coming from your phone in the pocket of your dress. Lifting it in front of your blurry eyes you blink a few times to clear them. You try to make out the name but it’s an unknown number, you declined the call.

“Besides, he probably hates me now.” Vibration came from your phone again. *Decline* Another call from the unknown number.

“He doesn’t hate you, y/n. I don’t think-” Annie begins to say but then you interject,

“I’m sorry, I gotta take this. This asshole keeps calling me.” Walking out of the club, you answer the call and before you can talk, you hear a gruff voice on the other line,

“Y/n?” You’d recognize that voice from anywhere. The last time you heard him speak was four months ago when you told him you were breaking up with him.

“Y/n, you there?”

“Butcher?”

“I need your help.”

“What happened?”

“I’m hurting real bad. I need you to come help me.”

“If you’re really that hurt-”

“Y/n, please.” You hear the desperation in his voice. He never begs for anything; he must be down bad. You let out an exasperated sigh and then *click*.

“Butcher? Billy?” You look at the phone screen and see that the call has ended. *ping* An address pops up on your phone. You sigh again. Tapping the edge of your phone on your forehead in frustration, you make your decision. You meet up with Annie and Kimiko and tell them that you’ll catch up with them later, you’ve got something you have to deal with. Rather, someone. But you didn’t dare tell them that.

Hailing a cab and telling the driver the address, you kept thinking this was not a good idea. From what you heard from the gang; Butcher did not take the breakup well. He broke things, drank more, and pushed everyone to their breaking point. MM had to leave the group to regain his sanity, only to return shortly after leaving. Kimiko recounted that Butcher was better when you were around. So why the hell was he calling you if you caused him so much pain? Watching the progression of your map marker reach its destination on Google Maps, your heart began to beat harder in your chest. The car stopped outside of a tall brick building. Tipping the cab driver you made your way in, texting Butcher and asking which level and unit he was in.

Trekking up the steps, heart pounding in your chest, the blurriness in your eyes from the booze now cleared, you made your way to his door. *knock, knock, knock* The door swung open, and across the threshold was Billy Butcher. Still the same handsome man you turned to putty for not too long ago. He stood before you shirtless, clad in green sweatpants. Your mouth went dry, and the screaming thoughts in your brain telling you to march right back down those steps ceased. The two of you just stood there, staring at each other.

“You uhh… gonna let me in or what?” Butcher blinks and then makes an opening for you to slip through. Hearing the soft click of the door shut behind you, you take in the emptiness of his studio apartment. The only furniture in the room was a pull-out bed with tangled sheets, coffee table covered in empty alcohol bottles and a box TV on a beat-up nightstand. You feel guilty for a moment as when the two of you were together, the apartment you lived in never got to this state.

“You said you were hurt?” You said as you turned around to face Butcher. He just stands there, holding a sweating beer bottle in his hand, eyes scanning you up and down. His eyes settle on your cleavage. You snap your fingers to get his attention. It works.

“What did you need help with?” Butcher explains that he needed to be patched up on his back. Turning him around you see that it’s scratches with some gravel lodged in the deeper lacerations. Most of the wounds were superficial, and none of them needed sutures.

“Jesus what did you do tonight, Butcher?”

“Got in a tussle. You gon help me or not?”

“Yeah, turn around.” As you begin cleaning the wounds on Butcher's back, your thoughts then return telling you that you should not be here and you should have gotten MM to clean his back up. After using a tweezer to pull out the small bits of gravel from his back, you grabbed a paper towel and doused it with hydrogen peroxide.

“This is gonna sting.” Before you got a reply out of him, Butcher hissed at the light dabbing you placed on his wounds with the paper towel. As he hissed, you saw the muscles in Butcher's back tense, reminding you of the times he had you on your back and was fucking up into you, head cradled in the crook of your neck, giving you a perfect view of his shoulders and back. You shake your head.

“Okay all done. Be more careful next time.” Throwing the used items in the trash bag and make your way to the bathroom to wash your hands in the bathroom sink. Splashing cold water on your face, makeup be damned, attempting to slow down the growing desire in your core. Walking out of the bathroom, you spot a Hawaiian shirt on the floor, torn and bloody. You look down to inspect it.

“Aw man, this was the shirt I gave you for your birthday. It’s fucked.” You see Butcher pouring two glasses of amber-colored liquor, and he offers you a glass.

“My favorite shirt.” He replies. You shake your head to decline the drink, but Butcher, being who he is, insists. Yanking the glass out of his hand and downing the amber liquid in one gulp, you set the glass down on the counter. You give him a brief goodbye and walk toward the door. Butcher grabs your wrist; you turn and see a silent plea in his eyes. Your brain screaming at you to fly down those steps and out of the building, your heart telling you to be in his arms again. He’s not good for you, he’ll get you killed.

Fuck it, it's fine. You pull Butcher down into a feverish kiss. His mouth met yours with as much passion. You both shuffle to the edge of the pull-out bed, and you push Butcher backward. He falls back easily, letting you take the lead. You go to remove your dress when Butcher places his hands on yours and assists you in pulling it over your head. Once the garment was removed, you straddle Butcher and continue kissing him with the same fiery passion as before, his hands roaming all over your exposed form. You sit up and rock your hips against his, generating some friction for your needy core. Locking eyes with him, you see that Butcher's hazel iris is now covered by his pupils, eyes entirely covered in black. After a few more hip gyrations, Butcher pulls you back down to kiss you. He poured everything into the kiss, tongues, and teeth clashing. You pull away from Butcher and help him lower his sweatpants. Once free, you grab ahold of his throbbing cock and pump it a few times then line it up to your core, rubbing the tip along your slit. Butcher moans. As you sank down on him, you feel your cunt stretch to take all of him in. Once at full hilt, you take a moment to pause to get used to feeling him inside you again. Butcher sat up and rubbed your cheek with his thumb, wiping a few tears you didn’t realize were falling.

“I’ve missed you luv.” Butcher said as he stared into your eyes. It was as if he was looking into your soul, searching for something. You leaned forward and gave him a soft kiss on his lips as you began moving yourself on his cock. Butcher groaned, wrapping one hand around the back of your head and wrapped the other around your waist. The two of you moved in sync, you grind your hips to meet his light thrusts, gasps and moans filling the apartment. You feel the coil in your belly begin to tighten, Butcher felt it too. He then flips the two of you over to where you’re lying on your back and he’s positioned above you, grabbing your legs to wrap around his waist. He buried his head in the crook of your neck as he began to quicken his pace.

“Billy, don’t’ stop… I’m close.” You pant. Butcher takes his right hand and begins to rub circles around your clit, which pushed you over the edge. Butcher follows shortly after, spilling his cum into you with a roar. The two of you lay on the bed, fighting to catch your breath. After a few moments, you get up from the bed to get dressed. Looking for your dress under the bed, Butcher reaches his hand out and gently places it on top of yours. You look up at him and he says,

“Stay with me.” The internal struggle was real at this moment. Your brain tells you to leave, that this man was no good, but you loved Butcher. In the end, your heart won the battle, and you climbed in next to Butcher, snuggling up next to his side. Butcher whispered sweet nothings into your ear, promising you all the things that he said he would do from now on, and that he loved you. Silence fell between you. Just before Butcher fell asleep, you said,

“You know, Annie was proud of me for getting out. She’s gonna be pissed to hear that we’re back together.” Butcher turns his head to look at you.

“What’re you gonna tell her?”

“Oh, I dunno… maybe that I tripped and fell into your bed.” the two of you chuckle before falling into a restful sleep.

[androgymagnus]

HI JUST WANTED TO ASK did u just watch glass onion because I watched it yesterday and can see ur reblogs AND WOULD LOVE TO HEAR UR THOUGHTS!!!!!!!

Also I want to draw a fake movie poster for it so bad. It deserved nicer posters w janelle monae covered in blood fr (the glass letter ones r sexy tho)

ALSO HELP I just connected the dots that Phillip is Blancs partner oh my god. Gay people r real

LKJDFLG YEAH I DID <33 i loved it it's very good

i love it when a movie like. totally turns everything on its head at the halfway point and recontextualizes everything that's already happened. lkie. yes please bend my mind into little circles

and just generally i liked the twists and turns and it was visually interesting and like, it actually held my attention the whole time. i was never on my phone or distracted i watched the whole damn thing without pausing nine thousand times. which is a big deal for me, adhd king. like that says a lot

and there were just soooo many good little details, both ones i noticed and ones that i saw later being pointed out. and like the ending is so satisfying, kind of like a good episode of classic leverage but with a cinematic budget, where everything clicks into place and the rich asshole gets his just desserts and like. the characters are all fun (the "disruptors" are all so fun to hate, including miles, helen/andi is amazing, benoit blanc continues to be an icon in so many ways--i know people have said it before but i too am not immune to "protagonist who is genuinely kind and compassionate and wants to help people, cares more about other people than about "winning", etc" + he's so funny and i love how he takes no shit but does the whole polite southern columbo routine + he's GAY!!! god i love him so much, he's such a good main character--this kind of whodunnit gentleman detective thing can really like. the protagonist can make or break it--columbo works because columbo is so charming and endearing, other shows fail because the detective may be alright but just not compelling, or they lean too much into the "asshole genius" trope, benoit never falls into that and the fact he's consistently caring and compassionate is just. chefs kiss) and the plot was fun, it was like, well-done enough i wasn't like "that makes no sense" and even guessed some things, but was like, also still surprising and fun,,,,

like it's just a good whodunnit with strong deeply likable protagonists (both benoit blanc as the gentleman sleuth, and helen as the sorta watson of the movie/true main character--god both of them did such a good job, they're so iconic) and a satisfying ending

and such good humor!!! miles covering his chest when they mention his "golden titties", benoit yelling about how dumb it all is, him revealing the whole fake mystery immediately and getting tossed an ipad, THE ICONIC SCENE AT THE BEGINNING WITH THE PUZZLE BOXES I FUCKING CACKLED WHEN SHE SMASHED IT, etc

also dlkfgj help yeah when i first watched it i legit didn't make that connection either and then later when people were like "oh his boyfriend/husband/partner!!!" i was like oh yeah!!! yeah that tracks!!! like i'd heard he was gay but i'm fucking stupid and somehow just did NOT make that connection at all

anyway im not saying it was perfect, i'm sure it had flaws, but i really enjoyed it and i'm definitely going to force my mom to watch it when she gets home from her christmas holiday trip

would love to see these posters 👀 feel free to tag me if you post them

[mlobsters]

supernatural s13e04 the big empty (w. meredith glynn)

SAM Dean, that isn’t what this is about. Jack needs to get out. He needs to get some air. We all do. He’s a good kid. He is, just… give him a chance, please. For me.

dean surely can't resist that

JACK So I can be your “interdimensional can opener”? You’re using me. SAM Jack… when you were born, it ripped a hole in reality. Like a—like a door from this world to another, to a… a really bad, bad place. So—so Dean and Cas, and I, we—we closed that door. But… our Mom, Mary, she’s trapped on the other side. If we can get your powers back, maybe we can open that door up. Maybe…

hadn't really thought about but i wouldn't put it past sam of days gone by if he desperately needed something to only play nice to get what he wanted

SAM Yeah. Yeah, I do. But… if this doesn’t work, if that can’t happen, that’s okay, because I do care about you. But I should’ve told you. I’m sorry. It’s a lot and, uh… JACK Dean can’t even look at me. He wants to kill me. SAM I won’t let that happen. Listen, if there’s one thing that Dean respects, it’s effort. So come along. Help us out. Let’s go be the good guys.

i guess it speaks to my feelings about the show right now but i'm so sick of this thing over jack between sam and dean. the only sliver of an upside is hearing sam talk about dean a lot

DEAN All right, well, you said you wanted to help, so, uh… dig. SAM Dean, what’s up with all the orders? You’re starting to sound like Dad.

ooh, burn. i laughed

DEAN That a bad thing? SAM I’m just saying his—his drill sergeant act worked with you… but it didn’t work with me. And that’s not the way we’re gonna get through to Jack.

tell him, sam. but also, samuel. you essentially invited a large toddler to come, it's gonna be a lot of legit babysitting the way they're making this character behave. it's like vacation with kids. it's less work to stay at home 🤪

DEAN That’s right, and what gets burned… stays dead

or not 🤪🤪🤪 so did people know cas was coming back when this season started?

ah we've seen this lady before, she was in 7x07 and i hiky'd her because she's in yellowjackets (rukiya bernard as simone abara)

rolling my eyes at the family therapy with jack along cover. dean continues to be an asshole about jack and he's fucking up their cover by being an ass and i kind of want to punch him

DEAN Because if he admits it, then it’s real. If it’s real, then he has to deal with it, and he can’t handle that. SAM Right, because this is so easy for you, uh? DEAN No, it’s not easy. SAM Yeah, but at least you had a relationship with Mom. I mean, who would she always call? Who did she look to for everything? DEAN Okay. SAM You had something with her I never had! And now I’m just supposed to accept that I never will have it?

oh, sammy. dean only had a few scraps too, fighting over crumbs

MIA You just upset your brother so much, he had to leave the room. And Jack? Look at him. He’s terrified of you. DEAN Nah. No, we’re simpatico. Right, kid? JACK We’re simpatico. MIA Convincing. You’re angry, Dean. DEAN And? MIA And if you don’t want to do anything about it, that’s your business. But you’re aiming it at everyone in your life.

the way they're learning into him being an asshole, hope it means it'll taper off soon.

good god what is this voice/accent big empty entity fake cas

COSMIC ENTITY That’s not part of the deal. No, no. Besides, you don’t want to go back. CASTIEL Yes, I do. Sam and Dean need me. COSMIC ENTITY Oh, save it. I have tiptoed through all your little tulips. Your memories, your little feelings, yes. I know what you hate. (Whispers) I know who you love… what you fear. There is nothing for you back there. No. Here. Let me show you. [We see some FLASHBACKS: METATRON stealing CASTIEL’s grace; LUCIFER killing CASTIEL; CASTIEL walking into the lake after the LEVIATHANS took over; CASTIEL returning the souls he stole from Purgatory; CASTIEL lying on the floor, seemingly dead, after returning the souls.]

thanks for the details, transcriber, i wasn't sure what those all were. i thought it was cas stealing whoever else's. not sure i understand where they're going with the "i know who you love and what you fear there's nothing for you on earth" business. feeling guilty for his fuckups? being resurrected so many times? i don't get it

we get the reassurance from a good monster lady and certified freak sam for jack now :p i did like the "even monsters can do good in the world" line though

well i'm glad the shifter didn't stay as dean very long because we went down that road in s1, no need to revisit :p

COSMIC ENTITY Come on, Castiel! Wouldn’t you rather be a fond memory than a constant, festering disappointment?

okay, fuckups it is. (how about shoutout to breaking sam's wall lalala)

DEAN (to Jack) You gotta snap these cuffs. JACK I can’t. DEAN Yes, you can. DEAN Sammy believes in you, and when he believes, he’ll go Hell for leather…

well, saving sammy's life is a surefire way to earn some points with dean

DEAN Hey. You did good today, Jack.

all right, next let's keep up the better-than-john parenting going

DEAN Listen, man, back at, uh, Mia’s, I was out of line. I’m sorry for being a… a dick lately. SAM Thanks. DEAN And maybe you’re right, about the kid. I mean, he tries. I’ll give him that. And he tapped his powers, saved our ass, so that’s a win. SAM Yeah. I guess. DEAN What’s up? SAM What if you’re right? About Mom. What if she is dead, and I’m just in denial? DEAN Don’t say that. SAM What? You’ve been wanting me to admit that since it happened. DEAN I know I have, but don’t say that. I need you to keep the faith, for both of us. ‘Cause right now, I… Right now, I don’t believe in a damn thing.

at least you're acknowledging the cognitive dissonance, dean-o :p

and i guess cas get back to earth by virtue of annoying the empty entity, okay. i briefly had some feelings with the music swelling when cas woke up in the field however then it turned into panflute?? and the feelings were gone :p which leads into this...

was watching the last little bit of e3 where cas wakes up and the soundtrack gets different/a little interesting - has this choral element that reminds me a bit of the (far superior) musical score in the expanse. the title sequence makes me weep lol. anyway, the spn thing, the voices transition into strings-ish? but i wonder if the score was all done electronically, or how much was done with instrumentation. i know nuts and bolts of how a couple smaller tv and movie score composers work, but i don't know what the norm is - especially on a (i presume) lower budget show. and i wondered if that's why it often feels flat. i dunno. he just switches up genres and sounds with no real rhyme or reason, sometimes i think it sounds like he heard someone do something cool and then sorta.. cribs it, and we get the knockoff. sigh. this poor dude. raggin on him almost daily.

i'm the opposite of effective at getting anyone to ever watch anything, but really. it's such a good show, from start to finish.

[yoonpobs]

bad boy good thing viii.

pairing: jeon jungkook x oc

genre: angst, smut, fluff, miscommunication (we hate her lol), pining

warnings: smut, jungkook is really an asshole, the angst hurts a lot tbh, unhealthy relationships (?)

words: 1, 964

summary: a series of drabbles where you're confused and jungkook's confusing

“I can’t believe this!” Jeonghan puffs while he drops his belongings loudly onto the table in the study lounge, causing a few other students to turn and glare.

“Would it kill you to be quiet?” Jungkook grumbles, picking at the edge of the paper of his textbook, eyes never straying away from the content of the page.

“No. I will not be quiet because I thought football bros were bros for life!” Jeonghan whines.

Jungkook raises an eyebrow. “You know that’s kind of concerning when you put it that way.”

Jeonghan simply waves the other boy off before he leans forward as if he has something important he has to say. Jungkook knew him well enough to know that it would either waste Jungkook’s precious study time or be something so out of the ordinary that he can’t help but be intrigued.

Jungkook shrugged and takes the chance, anyway.

“Namjoon bailed.” He deadpans. “Again!”

Jungkook stiffens ever so slightly but feigns disinterest with a noncommittal hum.

“Really.”

Jeonghan nods his head, or shook his head—it was hard to tell because he was all over the place and he seemed more displeased than anything.

“I never thought we’d lose our own captain to a girl.” He sniffs.

Jungkook sighs, already done with the conversation because somehow no one can ever mention Namjoon without mentioning you now, apparently because the two of you were hanging out much more frequently. He’s bitter. And he’s confused—because he’s attempted patching things up with you but you only would ever reply to him with curt responses than the enthusiastic ones you used to flatter him with.

JK: hey. there’s a new cafe outside of campus. U wanna go?

Smarty Pants 🐰: Im busy. Next time? :)

JK: are u free tonight?

JK: im heading to the library later. wanna meet up for some ramen first? On me!!!

Smarty Pants 🐰: sorry jungkook, meeting w administrators for pastoral care matters

Smarty Pants 🐰: Do you need help with the content?

JK: oh… it’s fine, just wanted to hang out with you. We haven’t done that in a while

JK: jimin said u finally have some free time next week? Let’s catch up! i’ll treat u to some banana bread :D

Smarty Pants 🐰: i have plans with joon. which day were you thinking?

JK: Anytime. When are you meeting hyung?

Smarty Pants 🐰: we kind of have plans every day, here and there. could I get back to you?

And that was it. The blow that Jungkook knew he deserved but couldn’t deal with. You had tried your best to avoid any personal interaction with Jungkook and he didn’t know what the fuck to do.

“They’re kind of perfect for each other, don’t you think?” Jeonghan interrupts Jungkook’s sour mood when he recalls all his failed attempts at trying to meet with you personally.

Jungkook blinks then furrowed his eyebrows.

“Who?”

Jeonghan rolls his eyes. “Joon and your friend _____.” He knocks on the table. “Bunch of nerds together.” He adds with a snicker.

Jungkook stiffens, hands clutching his textbook tighter.

“You say that like there’s something wrong with being a nerd.” He says slowly.

“There isn’t. Really.” Jeonghan defends. “It’s just so … fitting. Captain of the football team who’s lowkey a softie and an art nerd with the overachiever on campus. Their IQ’s combined are probably in the 300 range.”

Jungkook scowls.

“Haven’t you heard of the phrase ‘opposites attract’?” Jungkook asks sourly.

Jeonghan scoffs. “Yeah. Like you actually believe in that cliche phrase. Come on—we all know you’re likely to end up with someone who’s more like you than different.”

The insinuation doesn’t sit well with Jungkook, but he can’t chew Jeonghan out for it anyway. He didn’t know the nature of your friendship with him, nor was he aware of the history the two of you shared.

“Never say never.” Jungkook shrugs.

Jeonghan rolls his eyes before taking out his laptop and settling into a comfortable position.

“I think he’s going to ask her to be his girlfriend soon.” He says off-handedly as if he assumed Jungkook gave a shit.

He did, and his heart drops to his stomach.

“Hey,” Jungkook calls out when he spots you slip past him at the foyer outside the humanities building.

You twirl around at the sound of your name being called, and your eyes widen when you spot Jungkook walking towards you with furrowed brows.

“J-Jungkook?”

Why you sounded so scared to see him, he wasn’t sure. But he knows that he’s frustrated because it’s the first time he’s seen you after the game where you and Namjoon left to hang out at the exhibition, despite his desperate attempts at calling you out to hang out with him.

“You’ve been avoiding me.” Jungkook frowns, cutting straight to the chase.

You splutter for a response, and you realise that you’re basically gaping at him when you clutch your folders tighter to your chest.

“I’ve been busy, Jungkook. I told you this.” You softly remind him.

Jungkook scoffs, and he feels his mean bone grow; feeling the need to correct you because you were smart—and both of you knew that your excuse was lame.

“Really?” He says dryly. “Too busy to hang out with me but not with Namjoon?” He can’t help how bitter he sounds, especially when he’s heard from the rest of the football members; including Jimin and Taehyung that you were spending a suspicious amount of time with the captain.

You furrow your brows at him when Jungkook stares you down, waiting for a response.

“That doesn’t change the fact I was busy.” You huff.

Jungkook frowns at you, clutching his backpack tighter with his hand as he notices the way you avoid his eyes by dropping them to the ground.

“Why are you being like this?” Jungkook accuses, tone already on the offensive.

You gape up at the boy, brows scrunched in displeasure.

“Me? I’m not being anything. I told you that I was busy and we would rain check, didn’t I?”

Jungkook tongues the inside of his cheek, frustration pooling in his stomach. “Somehow you’re only busy whenever I want to hang out, right?” He scoffs sarcastically. “I thought we were good.”

You stiffen, knuckles turning white when you grip your belongings harder.

“We are.” You say curtly.

“No, we’re not.” Jungkook retorts. “If we were then you wouldn’t need to find shitty excuses to get out of hanging out with me.”

You open your mouth, then close it. You feel yourself grow more exasperated with Jungkook the more he can’t realise the fact that you were still finding a way to navigate the throes of your relationship with him.

“They were not shitty excuses.” You snap. “Listen, we can meet tomorrow for coffee if you really—”

“That’s not what this is about!” Jungkook exasperates, breathing out in a huff.

You purse your lips. “Then what is it, Jungkook? You came up to me and started accusing me of lying to you because I couldn’t meet up at the times you proposed.”

Jungkook clenches his jaw when he notices the way your voice gets increasingly sterner when you talk to him. It only reminds him of the way you used to chastise him when he was younger when he’d do something that was ‘immature’ but standard for a teenaged boy.

“I apologised!” He cries. “I’m sorry I was a dick before this but I’m really trying to fix things between us but you’re—”

“I’m what, Jungkook?” You interject with a frown. “I’m doing my best at healing?” You add softly. “An apology won’t erase what happened.”

Jungkook feels himself deflate, especially at the way your eyes dart away when he attempts to look into them.

“I know it won’t but I just want things to go back to normal.” He sighs.

You screw your eyes shut, finding the words to say before you look at him with such sad eyes that he nearly pulls you close just to comfort you so that he wouldn’t have to acknowledge the fact that it was his fault.

“It’s not that easy.” You whisper, gripping at the hem of your sleeves. “It may be for you but it’s not the same for me.”

Jungkook releases a sigh so loud that your eyes widen, as he attempts to think of something better to say—to offer.

“I really am sorry.” He lamely apologises, his voice sounding a lot like a scolded child.

“I know.” You nod. “But you don’t know how it feels to have …” You swallow. “Whatever. We’re good. I just need time, Jungkook.”

Jungkook furrows his brows when you turn away to stalk off, but he grabs at your elbow to turn your body to face him. Your eyes briefly make contact with the way he’s gently holding onto you before they tilt up to meet his confused gaze.

“How it feels to have what?” He pries.

You sigh, shaking off his grip. “Look. It doesn’t matter. I’m being sensitive.” You deprecate immediately.

Jungkook doesn’t miss the spite in your tone, especially when you say it so firmly and seriously when you dismiss him.

“I want to fix this—us.” He pleads desperately. “Why can’t you just be honest with me?”

As if his words set you off, your eyes snap up and blaze with the pent up fury and anger you’ve been suppressing the entire time.

“Me? Be honest with you?” You scoff. “Real fucking funny. Because when I was honest with you, you turned it on me and took advantage of my vulnerability.”

Jungkook’s eyes widen. “What—?”

“You want honest?” You fume. “Fine. I’ll give you honest but you better listen closely this time because I won’t be repeating myself again.” You poke into his chest, even if it’s fierce and stern, he feels the heartache pouring through. “You were my best friend, Jungkook. You were and are someone important to me and you fucked me over because you knew I couldn’t say no to you. You knew how I felt and you took advantage of that fact just so you could get what you wanted and go.”

Jungkook furrows his eyebrows, confused at the information you were throwing at him.

“How you felt—?”

You cut him off again with a huff. “Don’t pretend like you didn’t know. Why else did you think I did all the shit you wanted?”

“I-I don’t understand.” Jungkook stutters, head caught in a loop when you glare at him harder.

“You knew every bit of insecurity that I had and you weaponised that against me just so you could keep me close.” You say softly. “You knew, either way, I would’ve stayed because I’ve always been there, Jungkook.”

“You’re confusing me.” He deadpans, grabbing onto your shoulders so you were forced to stare at him.

He notices the glistening of your eyes as he feels his heart constrict when he realises you’re trying your best to keep your tears at bay.

“Well, you did it first so it’s only fair.” You sniffle. “You can act like shits fine because you weren’t the one who was attached. I was. So just let me have this time to myself to figure things out because I can’t even be around you without being sad, Jungkook.” You whimper.

He calls for your name but you're already furiously rubbing at your eyes as you curse under your breath as you spin on your heels to hurry away.

Jungkook gapes at you as he attempts to process what you just said, but before he can get another word in—you're leaving him to feel the weight of your words in the footsteps that draw further and further away.

[rbvcdeluxe]

YOU GET IT I LOVE YOU

Honestly I'm not good at explaining my thoughts about morals (cuz i have problems w morals myself ngl) of characters but I wanna talk about it. Literally no character is pure. They all go in the spectrum of A Bit Of An Asshole to The Asshole. Most of them are terrible people. The Langs do a great work making antagonistic characters and I love them for that, both the characters and the Langs. These asshole of characters are incredibly fun to watch, they are annoying, crazy, and you love to hate them, and that's really the fun of it. You could go pick a random character and tell their flaws and morals. Every character is part of the yin yang, either by being both black and white or purely one side.

The deal with these characters is that they are not real and do not have the idea of resembling someone in e specific. Sure they can resemble people, but in the stereotypical way, these characters are not made with someone in mind, but with the concept in mind. These characters work for us as ways of seeing personalities and/or people interacting with certain individuals or situations, and people need to understand these are not necessarily based in real experiences, even if at some point resembles it. My best example would be Max, he is a bully and that's the idea of him, a terrible fucking bully who make's people lives a hell, and yes, this can be a shared experience to a lot of people. A lot of people had bullies or heck, even were bullies, but he isn't with the concept of a real person in specific, he was made by fiction for fiction. This part is not really THAT necessary to add but I think it's important and related to the topic: The actual problem about liking characters who are morally bad is when these characters are based in real people, when these characters are part of a document series, a biographical story, and even an insert of real experiences. Back in 2022 I quite saw people saying “Dahmer is my favorite character” or something along those lines, referring to the biographical series of Netflix, and now there is the problem, that is not a character, that is the representation of an actual person.

What I'm trying to say with that is: The moment you are not allowed to like characters to a certain extent is when they are simply just not characters, they are real people. There are a few exceptions to this which are mainly based BY the topic of it, like sexual assault. It just REALLY REALLY depends of how it's portrayed, “is it in a good way or a bad way? are the creators trying to seem it as justified or not?” I hope you get my point with this.

I've seen so much hate for Sam Sweetly enjoyers (aka me) (and by much hate i mean occasional hate. but it’s too exaggerated.) and I'm just like??? what??? what r u talkin about??? jesus christ. Writing or liking morally bad characters does NOT make YOU a bad person and I need people to understand that. And again, If you like seeing the actions of certain characters that are morally bad does not make you morally bad. Saying that you like a character does not mean you agree with their actions, it means that you enjoy the changes he makes the course of the story, that you enjoy seeing how that certain character interacts with the surroundings, how that character expresses and what they do in a situation, how they are characterized, how interesting they are to see what would they do. And seems like a lot of people don't realize that.

People also like these type of characters because of how interesting it would be to know the reasons of why they are like that. And I believe it should be pretty clear that the main characteristic of antagonists is that they all have reasons, they have a story. It is interesting to wanting to know why they decide their actions and their motivations, what are their thoughts process and how are they wills to do what they do. The fun of them is how terrible they are, the fun is thinking “why THE FUCK are they like this?”, “How dare they say that”, “How dare they do that”, “What happened for them to become this?”

Another thing to note heavily is that Hatchetfield, besides being a comedy, it's an horror. The Hatchetfield series is a horror and not only comedy. There will be morally terrible characters, there will be disturbing actions, scenes and situations. I understand people being uncomfortable with certain characters or situations because of personal experiences or because it triggers a phobia, but that doesn't exactly give you the right to tell people what to like and what not. You don't like Max because of personal experiences with bullying? That's alright! You don't like Melissa because of a phobia? That is also alright! You can have your own opinions, but please remember that not everyone has your same brain, not everyone shares your same experiences, not everyone shares your same experiences AND thoughts. There will be people who have experienced things related to the morals of a character and still like them.

This is also all part of media literacy. All of this is fiction, all of this is connected, everything is part of a horror-comedy, a thriller, a fiction to represent real problems with a touch of eldritch beings. Hatchetfield is a series full of what-if's, this is a series to play with the characters. What people do in Hatchetfield can be easily manipulated and you can get ANYTHING from it. So really, please don't be surprised if characters are not morally good. Hatchetfield is a fucked up town, people missing is normalized, nobody seems to care about global problems, no one does nothing about the murders, they are all morally bad, do not expect anything correct from these characters.

So yeah. Anyway I like talking if you couldn't tell lmao /sar. I hope i explained well 💔

It shocks me that the Hatchetfield fandom doesn’t embrace the fact so many of the characters are garbage people. Max Jagerman? Horrible person, a bully and sexual harasser. So damn fun to watch. Linda Monroe? Annoying Karen mother who’s entitled and selfish. Amazing character, give us more of her being just the worst.

With a series full of characters who span from being assholes to down right evil people, it’s shocking that there’s so much hate towards people who like these characters. Let people like morally bad characters, it’s fun! Hell, make them likable if that’s what’ll make you happy. If you don’t like how someone else sees a character, maybe you’re the problem

Maybe I’m missing the point, I dunno. I love antagonists in any media really, Hatchetfield especially. Let people like the characters they like, hell let them redeem the ones that may be considered redeemable. If you don’t think they’re redeemable, cool. Move on with your life :)

[ibuki-loves-you]

Trigger Happy Havoc Girls with an S/O who is like Mikan

Warnings: Mikan's personality/actions

Mod Ibuki: Hey hey hey!! Sorry for the long wait on this :/ I hope it was worth it, though!

Kyoko:

Kyoko was immediately worried for your safety

She had a lot of questions

Why were you so shy? Had you been through something?

She kept those questions to herself though

If someone ever made fun of you, she’d glare

Literally just walk up to you, wrap on arm around your waist and the other on your arm

And glare

If you ever took a fall in front of her she’d carefully lean down and help you up, suggestive or not

Although she might blush a bit if it was a suggestive position

“There, you’re alright. It was just a small trip, thankfully.”

If you ever offered to take your clothes off for her, she would be appalled

“Love, I don’t want you to take your clothes off because I’m not in a particularly good mood. Bad moods are normal, that doesn’t mean you take your clothes off every time it happens. Don’t offer that to me unless you personally want to do it.”

Kyoko is not someone you can look at and feel as if she’s mad at you, because she makes it clear if she is

But if you did think she was, she’d be pretty upset

“No, love. I’m not mad. You did absolutely nothing wrong. Nothing at all. I honestly don’t think I can be mad at you. You just seem to make everything better.”

Kyoko’s heart skips a beat whenever you’re around <3

Hina:

Hina LOVED YOU

The minute you two met she did not let you out of her sight for long periods of time

She was just worried someone would hurt you or take advantage of you

If someone ever made fun of you, she’d be so mad

No one wants to deal with mad swimmy baby

“That is so rude, you know!? That was completely uncalled for! There was absolutely no reason to say that! Now apologize!”

If you ever took a fall in front of her, she would honestly fall too just to make you feel less embarrassed

She’d cover you if need be, though

Either with clothing or with herself when she “falls”

If you ever offered to take your clothes off for her, she’d be in shock

Mainly because you offered it to her because you thought she was upset

“What!? Please, S/O, no! Don’t say that! Taking your clothes off won’t make me feel better, cuddles will! Get over here! Because of that statement, I demand you let me cuddle you!”

If you ever thought Hina was mad, which is rare, she’d he so upset

“Baby! No! Not at all! I could never be mad at you! I swear! Your face is just too adorable to be mad at!”

Swimmer baby just wants your happiness above all

Celestia:

Celeste would never admit it if anyone asked

But she loved you the minute she laid eyes on you

Your personality only made her want to be with you more

Not many people dared to bother you, but if an unlucky soul did try to do such a thing…

Celeste would give them a run for their money

“Are you fucking kidding me!? How dare you!? Why don’t you crawl back into whatever ditch you crawled out of and leave my significant other alone! Do I make myself clear!?” She’d turn to you and give you a soft smile. “Come on, dear. Let’s go get some tea to cheer you up, yes?”

If you fell in front of her, she wouldn’t be able to catch you without falling herself, but she’d immediately take your hands and help you up

“Come now, darling. Don’t cry, it was an accident. Everything is alright.”

If you ever offered to take your clothes off for her, it would take a second to click

But once it did her reaction was similar to Kyoko’s

“Darling, I don’t wish for you to take off your clothes merely because Yamada put me in a foul mood. I would much rather you keep said clothes on and have a cup of tea with me, maybe some conversation as well. Please don’t offer yourself to me out of pity.”

If you ever thought she was made at you, she honestly thought she was gonna cry

“W-What? Dear, no. Not one bit. Not one ounce of me is angered by you. I love you far too much to be mad at you. Now, come here and let me hug you.”

Celeste truly does care about you, more than she has cared for anyone before <3

Sakura:

Protective

That’s it

Sakura wants your safety above all, because she knows how shy people can be taken advantage of easily

If anyone dared to make fun of you, oh boy

Sakura is fucking terrifying

“I suggest you run before I snap you in half.”

That’s all it takes to send them on their way

If you fell in front of her, she would definitely be able to catch you

And she would!

But if you did manage to miss her arms, she’d pick you right back up and hold you

“See? I got you. Everything is okay.”

If you offered to take your clothes off for her, she’d be calmer, but nonetheless upset

“Hey, don’t do that. I don’t want you because of your body. I want you because of your personality. That’s what I fell in love with. Don’t offer yourself to me, or anyone else. Ever. It’s your body, you can most certainly choose what to do with it.”

If you thought she was angry with you, she’d be so quick to tell you otherwise

“No, not at all. I am not mad in the slightest. Even if I was, I’d never take my anger out on you. That’s wrong, and I love you too much to even think about doing that.”

With Sakura as your girlfriend, you will always be protected. And that’s a promise

Mukuro:

Mukuro is shy, but definitely not as shy as you

Like Sakura, she wanted your safety above all

Let it be from others or her cruel sister

If someone ever made fun of you, she’d be pretty angry

Hell, she may put those skills of hers to good use

“Hey. Don’t let me hear you say something like that again. Ever. That’s just plain disgusting.”

If you ever took a fall in front of her, her reflexes are extremely fast, so she’d try her absolute best to catch you

More often she does, but on the off chance she’s unsuccessful, she’d apologize with a bright blush

“I-I’m sorry, love. I tried to catch you, uh, I’m sorry. Here, grab my hands.”

If you offered to take your clothes off for her, she’d immediately say no

“S-S/O! No! No, I-I don’t want you to do that! I-I’m not in a bad mood, and even if I was I wouldn’t want you to take your clothes off just to try to improve my mood! Please don’t offer that to me, that’s practically violating you! And I don’t want to do that!”

If you ever thought she was mad at you, poor girl might cry

“L-Love, I’m not mad at all. I-I promise. Even if I was mad, I don’t think it could be caused by you in all honesty. I love you, okay?”

Soldier baby’s heart go brrr

Sayaka:

Shy or not, Sayaka’s a cute blushy mess around you

She still teases you in a friendly manner, but always makes sure you know she’s only playing

If anyone over bothered you, she’d be incredibly salty

Like, pettiness and all

“Oh, so that’s how you’re gonna be? Well, I’ll have you know that my significant other is NOT gonna do that. You’re a rude person and I hope karma hits you hard.”

If you took a fall in front of her, she’d screech so sound and try to catch you, but would most likely fail

When she saw that you were embarrassed, like Hina she would trip to make you feel better

“See, S/O? It’s fine! Now we both tripped, hehe! Isn’t that funny!”

If you ever offered to take your clothes off for her, she’d hug you immediately and try to make you happy

“Nope! I don’t want that, okay? I want to kiss your cute face! Not rub up on you because you want to make me happy! Now c’mere, so I can kiss your cute face!”

If you ever thought she was mad at you, though, she’d be really sad

“What? No, I’m not mad at all! Let alone at you! I promise, S/O. Even if I was mad, I’d have a peaceful conversation. Not a screaming match about it! Now, give me a hug!”

Sayaka will hug you as much as you please, as long as it makes you happy <3

Toko:

Toko thought you were annoying at first

But then she realized how similar you two were

Not long after, she fell in love with you

Just like in those cheesy novels she writes

If someone ever bothered you, she’d get pretty mad

Lowkey considers letting Syo out

“H-Hey, asshole! T-That’s a r-real d-dick t-thing to say! S-So w-why d-don’t you just g-go back to w-whatever ditch y-you crawled o-out of a-and d-die!”

If Syo was around when someone bothered you, well I think we know how that'll go

They aren't around anymore, especially if they were a pretty boy

If you ever fell in front of her, she’d lowkey get second-hand embarrassment, but would help you up anyways

“Hey, l-look, you’re fine. N-Not a scrape or anything. Y-You’re okay.”

Syo would leap into action immediately and pull you to your feet

"See!? It's like you never even fell! You're okay! No tears, I hate seeing you cry!"

If you ever offered to take your clothes off for her, she’d freak the fuck out

“W-What!? N-No! D-Don’t do t-that! K-Keep your clothes o-on! I-I’m n-not mad! E-Even if I w-was, I w-wouldn’t w-want you to s-strip! Y-You’re t-too p-pretty for t-that!”

If Syo was around, she would as well

"What!? Oh no no no, this just won't do! You're body is far to marvelous to be shown so willingly, y'know that? Don't let others see it so easy! Even if it is just me! Doesn't matter!"

If you thought she was mad at you, she’d scoff at first, but then realize you were being serious

“What? I’m not m-mad at you. W-Why would I b-be mad at y-you? I-I have no reason to b-be. D-Don’t say that, I-I’d tell you if I-I was mad at you...S-Speaking as if I-I c-could g-get mad at y-you.”

Syo would latch onto you and hug you, giving you a little spin

"No, dollface! I'm not angry at all! See? I'm happy! So happy! Especially because my baby-cakes is here! Now, c'mon! Gimme a smooch!"

Even though she’d deny it at first, Toko really does love you

[seabass17]

All that’s left | Pt. 2

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem! Reader

A/n: So, this is... a different reader in comparison from the one in the first part but I kinda like it? Anyway, Im considering making a third part and im thinking it'll contain some smut. I used google translator so please don't judge me. Tell me what you think. Happy reading.

All that's left pt. 1

Warnings: angst, mentions of scars, swearing, implied smut?

Word count: 3.263

Summary: After moving from her life in New York, away from the Avengers and him, she finds happiness and a life that she actually enjoys, but that seems to last little when she spots the familiar jet on the roof of the building she lives in. Is she ready to face them? To face him?

*Three months later*

The warm air surrounding my body made me take a deep breath and unconsciously smile. I was happy, I was free, I was whole. I was with my neighbor drinking coffee in our usual spot, which was a cafe near the main street of the place that I decided was going to become my new home.

“Продолжай рассказывать мне о своем боссе, который сводит тебя с ума” (Keep on telling me about your boss who drives you crazy) Andrei said making me laugh and shake my head.

“Не о чем говорить, он просто засранец, который дает мне слишком много работы и заставляет меня плакать” (Nothing to talk about, he's just an asshole who gives me too much work and makes me want to cry) I laughed. I had met Andrei a week after I moved in and there was an immediate connection. No, it wasn’t in a romantic one, god no, we were just really good friends that had a lot in common.

“Now now, that was not what i saw the other day when i went to pick you up from work” He said with a playful smirk plastered on his light brown face. I gasped, a fake indignant expression on my face while my hand went to my chest. He laughed loudly. “Don’t play that card, I saw you!” he added

“I don’t know what you are talking about” I said, trying to fight the smile that tried to come out but failing miserably, we both laughed.

He and I had become quite close in the little time that we had known each other. He was an American with a Russian name. He explained that his mother was from the states while his father was a russian spy, they fell in love against all odds and eventually, Andrei was brought to this world. When he was fifteen his father died and he and his mom went to America, where he finished high school and surprisingly, entered the military. He did two tours before he decided that he had enough and returned to Russia. Hence why he could speak both Russian and English fluently. As for me, I told him that I was in some sort of organization that worked for the government, and that’s why I knew russian. He believed me, thank God,  I didn’t want to talk about how I was part of the Avengers and why I left. Obviously I will tell him when the time is right and I know that he can be fully trusted.

“Oh, come on Ames, are you going to tell me that you don’t like him one bit? Not in the slightest?” he asked, smiling and I shook my head. He stayed silent for a second and stared at me, like he was considering whether he should ask me something or keep quiet. “Is it because of him?” he finally asked, watching me closely to see my reaction. I felt my stomach twist at the mention of him. Of course it was because of him, because of them, I couldn’t afford getting hurt and betrayed one more time. Andrei didn’t know his name, or theirs for that matter, so I smiled weakly and nodded.

“Yeah, I know it sounds stupid but… I just can’t afford getting hurt, not again, not anymore” I said looking at my hands.

“I understand, believe me I do” he said, his hand reaching out to hold mine. I looked up to find his brown eyes looking for mine, I saw nothing but genuine love -the friendly kind- in them. I smiled and squeezed his hand. He was going to say something but his phone rang; a notification. He withdrew his hand to look at his phone and the moment he did, people around us started getting up and running in the same direction. I looked at him confused to find him frowning at his phone.

“What is it?” i asked.

“The Avengers are here…” He said and my heart skipped a beat and my body went rigid. Andrei noticed. “What 's wrong?”. Well, there’s no use keeping him from the truth anymore.

“So, remember when I told you that I worked for an organization for the government? Okay don’t freak out and hate me but, here it goes” I took a deep breath. “That organization was called The Red Room were they trained me from a very young age to be a perfect cold-blooded killer, years later i escaped and was on the run until i got a new identification, name, address, new everything and then joined the avengers to amend the wrongs I made in the past. To my luck, it didn’t go great because it ended up breaking me the same way The Red Room did, so I left to find a fresh start and came here where I met you. Please don’t hate me” I concluded in one breath. Andrei was silent with a straight face, which was hard to read, and eventually after a few seconds that felt like an eternity and shrugged his shoulders. WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN.

“Believe it or not, I've heard worse” he simply said

“Worse than finding out that your best friend is a train killer and former avenger?” i asked incredulously and he tilted his head and smirked

“US Agent mother and Russian spy father” He said. I laughed and he followed right after. “So, I'm guessing we are running away?” he asked. Say what now?

“We?” I asked, almost in shock to which he simply nodded, “You don’t think im just gonna let you go like that, please, is not that easy to get rid of me” he snorted. “And I'm supposing Amelia is not your real name either, given the fact that you ran off,” he added. Damn, he is good.

“Y/n, y/n y/l/n” I said and he slowly smiled

“Well y/n, nice to meet you, my name is Andrei Petrova” he said, extending his hand, i repeated his action with the same smile. “I’ve got to say, I like the name y/n more than Amelia '' he added and laughed. We were brought back to the matter at hand when the screaming of the people were getting louder. I snapped my head up and saw the familiar jet on the roof of the building where I was living.

“Here’s what we are going to do, I’m going to my apartment and buy us some time while you go get a car and,” i handed him my card “you are going to get all the money from my bank account. I will meet you in front of the cafe that’s two blocks away from my place”

“Are you going to be okay?” He asked with clear worry in his eyes. I smiled and nodded

“Yes, I promised. Now go” I said before he got up and ran. I sighed and went to my apartment. Was I really going to do this? After months, was I ready to face them, already knowing the truth? Well, guess I'm going to find out.

Once in the building I decided to programmed the lights to go out in 50 minutes and then I went to the elevator, wanting to appear as normal as possible even though I felt like my heart was going to explode from how fast it was beating inside my rib cage. When the elevator stopped at my floor I walked until I was standing in front of my door. I didn’t need to wait and confirm, I knew they knew I was here, now there’s only one thing left to do. But before I did anything, the door creaked open.

*10 hours earlier*

Bucky paced from one side to the other, finding himself incapable of staying put. Natasha sat silently on her chair, Tony was in the front with his head in between his hands, Steve was resting on the side of the wall looking at the floor, Bruce was just standing there holding his chin analyzing everyone in the room. Sam sat on the couch looking through his phone, Vision was sitting next to Wanda on the other couch, while Clint and Thor were sitting on the other chairs. Peter had some school stuff to deal with like the teenager that he was. They’ve been looking for her for the past three months, and about a week ago, a picture was found of someone that looked exactly like her, all except her hair that was a bit shorter and the color was different, but other than that, it was practically her.

Not wanting to get their hopes -or rather enthusiasm- up, they decided to look deeper and found out that the picture was taken a month ago in the city of Magadan located in Russia. They found out that before three months, the name Amelia Agapov, didn’t exist. The more they looked into it, the more they were convinced that it was her.

“The mission report from Agent Carter arrived, should i put it on the screen?” the voice of the AI filled the room. The team had been waiting for that report for days, the nerves of the question that lingered in the air ‘was it her?’ being present for that time only grew stronger as Stark asked FRIDAY to project the report on the screen.

Pictures were shown, most of them were about this woman buying in the market, having coffee with a guy, but there was one, where her face was looking straight into the lens of the camera, and it was that picture that left the people in the room absolutely rigid. It was her.

“We found her…” Tony said in a whisper. Everybody kept their gaze on the picture on the big screen. After months looking for her, they finally had found her. To everyone, it was like someone just discovered something new, a kind of relief and anxiety all at the same time.

“Suit up, we’re going to get her” Steve said to the group, but see, it was the choice of words from Cap that Bucky found unsettling.

“Get her? Like she is some kind of criminal?” he said, looking at his best friend dead in the eye. Steve opened his mouth to say something but Tony beat him to it.

“She was trained by The Red Room to be an assassin, we can expect nothing more from her '' He said, trying to calm Bucky down, but instead it only caused him to get angrier, and not only him.

“So was I” Natasha said, her voice low that could scare anyone to the bone if they weren’t so used to her.

"It's different" Tony said

“How is it different?” Wanda said this time, “It wasn’t when you practically recluded me after I helped Ultron and tried to kill you all” she added.

Tony sighed and looked down, realizing that he might be overreacting.

“Let’s just get suit up and get on with it” Steve said, cutting the rather awkward silence that filled the room.

The avengers were suit up and on the quinjet in less that forty-five minutes, and they were in Madagan in nine hours, it took them an hour to find her building, and once they found it, Clint landed the jet on the roof and they all got out and looked for her apartment. Funny enough, it was the same number as the one she used to live in New York; 108. They waited for what seemed an eternity until they heard footsteps just outside the door. Suddenly, the air felt thick with anticipation, but Bucky couldn’t wait any longer so he crossed the living room in two steps and opened the door. She was standing there. Silence took over the entire apartment until she broke it.

“Well, are you going to move so that I can get inside my goddamn apartment Barnes?” she said expectantly. Bucky realized that he had been staring at her since he opened the door. Her hair was different, more wavy and a shade or two lighter. He moved to the side and she was able to see the rest of the team. This was going to be one hell of an evening.

Breathe. In… and out…

It was hard. Fuck. Okay i can do this.

“Well isn’t this nice. All the team back together again!” I said with sarcasm dripping from every letter.

“What the hell did we ever do to you?” Steve said firmly.

“Damn, getting straight into it. That’s okay” i shrugged as I went to my room but the sound of the blasters of Tony's suit stopped me.

“Stop, don’t take another step” He said, lifting his hands and I smiled.

“Really? Well unfortunately i have to change, so i’ll leave the door open if it makes you comfortable” i said as i continued to walk to my room, and like I said, i left the door open.

“Y-you don’t have to do that, you can…” Wanda said but trailed off. I had taken my shirt off; my scars were shown.

“So, Steve” I broke the silence as I put on a black shirt, “the thing that you did wasn’t as bad as tin man over there, but you still let Hydra take me the day we took out the helicaries” i added. His face got pale and started shaking his head.

“What? No, you made it out safe, you-” He started saying but i interrupted him

“You sure? Who do you think stopped Rumlow when he tried to interfere with the exchange of the chip when you were in the helicarrier with Bucky?” He started thinking for a moment until he realized what I said fell into place. “Yeah, I took one hell of a beating, and if that wasn’t enough, I fell to the water. I fell thirty floors down, and I alone got myself out, because I didn't have anyone to cover me or have my back” i concluded.

“Your scars…” Tony said this time and i turned to him

“Yeah, thanks to you Mr. Stark” i said and he looked at me. “Doctor said that 74% of my body is covered with scars, along with one or two burns”

“You were that girl in The Red Room” Natasha said, causing me to turn my head to look at her and I smiled cynically, “You are Eliza” she finished.

“Давно не виделись с Натальей” (Long time no see Natalia) i said and she looked at me in pure surprise in her faced. That’s something coming from the famous Black Widow.

“What about the rest of us y/n?”  Sam said this time, redirecting my attention from Natasha to the rest of the group. Thor was standing there holding his hammer, Bruce was next to the fridge, Clint was by the sink, Wanda was with Vision beside the kitchen table and Bucky was by the door. They were all looking at me. I took a look at the clock, I have to leave in less than thirty minutes.

“Long story short, Clint, Bruce, Sam, Wanda and Vision are the ones that didn’t do anything, so just chill out, you are still on my good side” I smiled and waved my hand.

“Hold on, but what did I do?” Thor asked and I looked at him.

“God it really is unfair how such a little thing can cause such a big problem. The first time you came down to earth, met Jane, bla bla bla… when her stuff was under custody of shield, and you took that notebook; they blamed me. I know it may seem weird because, how? Thing is, I was undercover at that time inside Shield, so when the notebook disappeared, guess who was the one that got beaten for it. I couldn’t move from the pain.”

Thor was standing completely still.

“Lady y/n…”

“How is it possible? I was there  and never saw you” Clint interrupted Thor.

“It was before the avengers, i was on the run and a girl's gotta eat. Don’t worry, I never gave them anything. Got the money and then killed them, they were nobodies” I shrugged off.

“So, that’s all you needed to know, so if you please leave my…” I said but then he interrupted me.

“No” I would be lying if I said it didn’t send shivers down my spine at his tone, and I hate even more that he noticed it. “You’re missing one doll” Well fuck me

I turned to see him and he was walking painfully slow towards me and I was praying for my legs to not give out.

“Barnes” I simply said, thanking God and all the saints that it didn’t come out as a whimper. I took a look at the clock once more. I have to leave. Now. “Such a shame, wish you had fought for us, I would have gone through hell and back for you, Buck” his eyes were looking straight to my own and I felt like he was staring at my bare soul. In a way, he was. I smiled and I saw behind my back that the team was looking at us, we’ve never been this close, not in public anyway. I standed on my tiptoes and reached for his right ear, he instinctively reached down so it was a bit easier for me.

“If you want to know, you’ll have to find me first дорогой” (Sweetheart) I whisper. Next thing, the light went out just like I programmed it to and I slid beside Bucky to reach out to the door and to the hall. I could hear the team screaming ‘what the hell just happened’. I ran to the emergency stairs, and once out I could still feel him behind me, getting close. I went into an alley, having to detour, knowing that he eventually was going to catch up to me and I couldn't have him follow where I was really going. A few seconds later, I felt him caging me to the wall on the alley, both of us breathing heavily. His flesh hand went to my throat and his metal one rested on the wall.

“Given a different occasion, I would have loved this, don’t get me wrong, I still love how you…”

“What the hell are you doing?” he asked huskily and I smiled.

“I told you, you’ll have to wait until you find me again. Alone.” i said

“Come on Barnes, do you really think that the charade of being your personal fuck toy would last forever?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“It wasn’t like that, i…” he said but trailed off. The pain in my chest starting and clenching my heart.

“There it is…” i said lowly, the hurt in my voice evident, “listen, i’d love to keep talking about how you used me, but like i said,” i got close to his face, my nose touching his, “find me to found out” after that,  I raised my knee kicking him right in between his legs.

He let out a pained groan and fell to the floor, causing his grip in my neck to give out. I took advantage and ran. Two blocks away, I saw Andrei. When he saw me running to him, he immediately got in the car and turned the engine on, then I got in.

“Drive, fast” it was the first thing i said

“Where?” he asked while we took off. I smiled and looked at him

“You’ll see”

-

-

-

Taglist

@silentkiller2374 @vikingqueenlove @girlfriday007 @supraveng

[buckyownsmylife]

Buy a Heart - Steve Rogers Smut

The one where Steve’s your best friend and he grows tired of seeing you stuck with a lousy boyfriend.

Warnings: infidelity, smut, unprotected sex, abusive relationships

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I was woken up from my own thoughts by the sound of laughter, and quickly joined in so I wouldn’t look silly or as if I wasn’t paying attention to what had been said at the party - which was actually the case. It was getting harder and harder to put on the fake smile and pretend everything was okay when I just knew I didn’t love Thomas anymore. But I also couldn’t find the best way to break it all off with him, because the truth was… he scared me. And I hated that it intimidated me, but it did.

Almost as if he could hear my thoughts, his eyes fell on me, and I shuddered, forcing a smile that hopefully read “everything is fine”. He raised a single eyebrow, a clear indication that something bad was going to happen when we left this dinner party, but otherwise kept on the appearances in front of everyone else. He would never create a scene in front of the Avengers, of course.

Just then, my phone beeped, signaling that a message had arrived. It was Steve. Instinctively, I felt the need to raise my gaze and look for his, but I knew that I couldn’t. Thomas had enough insecurities about my best friend already, I didn’t need to add this to the list of reasons why he would yell at me tonight. So I read over the text and returned my gaze to the conversation, pretending it wasn’t anything of interest, waiting for the perfect opportunity to excuse myself.

“I’m going to the toilet,” I had to explain once my boyfriend’s hand trapped my wrist, securing it just a tiny bit tighter than it should. “I’ll be right back.” He pursed his lips, but otherwise let me leave without raising the attention of my friends, who remained blissfully unaware of the tension between him and I. Good. That’s how I wanted it to be. It wouldn’t do me any good to have Earth’s mightiest heroes worried about my well-being.

I moved towards the nearest bathroom instinctively, knowing Steve would already be there, waiting for me. My mind was overtaken by him and only him, that familiar gravitational pull making me reach for the door at the same time he opened it from the inside. Damn supersoldier hearing.

“You wanted to talk to me?” I asked when he had pulled me into the tiny bathroom, made all the more suffocating by his large figure that took pretty much all of the space in the room. But instead of answering, he cradled my face, eyebrows furrowed so deep it made me want to press a thumb between them, make sure they weren’t creating a definitive mark in his perfect skin. His eyes penetrated my very soul, and it was only when I finally allowed mine to meet his, that he let me go.

“When were you going to tell me?” The question made me freeze, Steve’s intimidating figure towering over me. My heartbeat had sped up, making sure that he knew just how I truly felt, but I still had to try.

“What are you talking about?” It was the wrong thing to say and I knew it. I knew it even before his hands curled into fists and he closed his eyes to take a deep breath, clearly trying to control himself. 

It wasn’t that different from what Thomas did whenever he considered I had done something to upset him, but there was a stark contrast between what I felt with my boyfriend and what I felt with my best friend: Steve only ever made me feel safe.

There was no doubt in my mind that whatever anger was coursing through his body wasn’t directed at me at all, just like I knew he would rather die that hurt me. Although my boyfriend had never really laid a finger on me, the fear was always there, omnipresent, looking over me.

“Don’t fuck with me, Y/N. You know what I’m talking about. How come you never told me that he’s abusive towards you?” Hearing those words being uttered by the person I cared the most only made the entire situation feel real. 

“It’s not like that…” I started, incapable of looking him in the eye again, but he held my chin and forced me to meet his gaze, so I could see just how serious he was about this situation. And I felt it. I felt it deep in my bones, and I knew there was no way we would step out of this bathroom to the same environment we had previously left.

“Bullshit.” I flinched, not because I was scared of the cold tone he used, but because I knew he was right. And still, I kept trying to find excuses - I don’t think I wanted to absolve Thomas from the role he had assumed in my life, it was more like I didn’t want Steve to think less of me for allowing myself to get trapped in such a situation.

Steve’s P.O.V.

“It wasn���t, though! He never laid a finger on me, I swear.” It was impossible to contain my scoff, no matter how badly I didn’t want to react in such a way to her words. It was impolite and it was rude and she deserved more, but I couldn’t find any way to reel myself in now that this anger had taken over me. Both of us knew we’d have to let it take its course so we could deal with the aftermath, whatever it may be.

“Y/N, you’re smart. You know that abuse isn’t just physical. You know.” She sighed, eyes closing momentarily to recollect herself, and I felt that itch, that urge that always spiked up whenever she was around, that just begged me to touch her, to feel her warmth under my fingertips in some way. 

Only this time I didn’t try to contain it - telling myself that this is what she needed to find comfort, to find the courage necessary to get this out. So I pulled her to me, wrapping a hand around the back of her neck and holding her head to my chest as the other went to her back, rubbing soothing circles there.

“It’s just… I don’t know how to end it, Steve. I-I hate to admit it, but... I’m scared.” The thought of her being anything near uncomfortable because of an asshole like that boyfriend of hers just made my blood boil. And she noticed, because there was the distinct sound of my teeth grinding as I moved my hands to hold her hips perhaps a little more tightly than I should.

“You shouldn’t be scared of anything. First of all, you’re an amazing agent and I know you can hold your own in any type of situation, much less anything involving an idiot like him. Second, if you feel like you can’t do this, for whatever reason, you know you can always count on us. At least, I hope you know you can always count on me.”

When she looked up at me, nodding enthusiastically while trying to blink away the tears that she didn’t want me to see, I was all at once taken over by the reality of my feelings for her. In that moment, nothing else existed, just me and her and this overwhelming need to make her feel good again, to remind her of how great love can actually feel if you’re with someone who would do anything for you.

So without even considering what I was doing, I cradled one side of her face and started to lean in, my heartbeat picking up as I watched her realize what was going on and close her own eyes in expectation. But before I could fulfill all of those late-night dreams I’d had about me and her, just before I learned what her lips felt like, I felt her hands on my chest, signaling me to stop.

“Steve…” She started, and I closed my own eyes, waiting for a simple no and expecting something even worse, expecting her to run from me and never look my way again, fearing I’d managed to absolutely ruin what I cherished most in the world: our friendship. “Steve, if you do thi- if we do this, I’m not letting you go,” she murmured, and the shock from the unexpected words had my eyes widening abruptly. 

“W-What?” I had to be sure, I had to be 100% sure that she had in fact said what I hoped not to have imagined. Could it be that she wanted me too?

“Don’t kiss me if you don’t mean it,” she urged, and I swear, my heart fucking stopped. How could she even consider that I would ever feel anything less than the most pure and profound love for her?

Y/N’s P.O.V.

Desire flowed through me in such a way it made me tremble. I’d dreamt about this, about having Steve and being his for so long, it was hard to believe he had actually wanted to kissed me. He’d wanted to kiss me, in a cramped bathroom, with my boyfriend a few feet away from us, and I had to know why. I just needed to know if this meant something more than pity or an effort to get me to leave Tom.

My lips were still tingling from the proximity of his when Steve leaned down to finally capture my lips with his, his full body pushing me against the bathroom counter until I could feel every single hard muscle of his pressed tightly against mine.

“Don’t you dare doubt my feelings for you,” he whispered when he allowed me a break to catch my breath, and in the silence that followed his statement, I knew everything in my life would never be the same.

“Kiss me again,” I implored, already pulling him to me by the back of his neck, and he came without any hesitancy. His lips were soft and pillowy and I couldn’t believe I now knew what my best friend tasted like.

It was clear the Steve was trying very hard to control himself and keep his touches as soft as possible, probably fearing that he would hurt me or scare me away, but when in his effort to feel every inch of me he inadvertently pressed his hard cock against my stomach, the strangled sound he released had me deciding I needed to break him then and there.

“Just… One second…” He asked, eyes closed while he tried to calm down his breathing, but I was already reaching for his zipper. At the feeling of my hand rubbing his boner, his eyes snapped open, meeting mine to find out that I was just as desperate for him as he was for me.

“No, don’t stop. I need you, Steve. I need you to remind me what it feels like to be desired again.” Although it wasn’t necessarily my intention, it was clear that even if I did manage to get through to him, it also rekindled a particular aggressive feeling I wasn’t expecting to see at that moment.

“I can’t imagine not desiring you…” he commented, fingers leisurely caressing my face until they curled around my jaw. “But knowing that someone had you and still didn’t seize the opportunity to give you every single thing you’ve ever wanted...”

I gasped when he easily hoisted me on the bathroom counter, my fingers thankfully still able to act towards my intentions even if my mind felt hazy with everything that was going on. While Steve peppered kisses down my neck, I managed to curl my fist around his girth, both of us gasping at the action, albeit for very different reasons. He was probably not expecting me to be able to reach his member without him noticing it - underestimating just how enthralled he’d become by my skin and my reactions - but my delight came from the size of the cock I now held in my hand.

Of course, I’d expected Steve to be big - bigger than most, even. That much was understandable, considering he was, after all, a super soldier. But even in my wildest, dirtiest dreams,  when I’d lay in my bed at night and imagine what it would be like to have him by my side, did I imagine he’d be this big.

“You’re so big,” I ended up exclaiming, against my better judgment, because just as I predicted, Steve stopped nipping on my collarbones to meet my eyes, clouds of worry clear in his.

“We don’t need to do this right now.” The only answer I could give him was to roll my eyes at the stupidity of that statement. He didn’t need to remind me that I didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want to, but to think that I would waste this opportunity was truly ludicrous.

“You underestimate just how badly I want this,” and I squeezed his member so he’d know I was referring to it, and not only to the act that I longed to partake in with him. “I’m not leaving this bathroom until I’ve taken every single inch of you.”

Steve whined from the back of his throat at my words, and a dopey smile certainly took over my face just before he leaned over me to ravish my lips with his mouth. “And here I was, thinking you were an innocent little angel.”

Giggling, I pushed him away just enough so I could jump back on the floor. “I’m certainly nowhere near innocent, but I’ll let you call me angel if you want to.” Each new groan I earned from Steve only served to increase both my desire and my ego, so I dropped to my knees without any other sort of preamble, surprised when his hands covered mine on his member, urging me to look at him.

“What’s wrong? Don’t you want this?” Steve chuckled, thumb running over my bottom lip as I stared up at him with what I was certain to be at least a slight pout. In my fist, his cock throbbed, warm and heavy, begging for my mouth to be wrapped around it. His own hand, still covering mine, squeezed the member, as if reminding me of just how hard he was.

“How could you even ask me that?” Fluttering my eyelashes at him, I sucked his thumb just to add to my already pretty convincing reasoning, enjoying the way his mouth fell open at the feeling of just how warm mine was.

Steve’s P.O.V.

“Then why won’t you let me help?” She whined when she finally released my thumb, and I had to take a deep breath just to remain in full control of my own body. God, how I wished I could fulfill all of my desires at once. Of course, I longed to feel her pretty lips wrapped around my member, but if I closed my eyes and even thought about it, I knew I’d cum on the spot.

“It’s not fair,” I began explaining, reaching out to pull her up by her forearms. “I’ve been dreaming about tasting your pussy for so long, you have no idea.” Her eyes closed with a happy sigh as she felt my breath on her face again. I took advantage of being this close to take her lips on mine once more, but she wouldn’t let me forget about the hard, pressing matter between us, and she kept slowly jerking me off.

“Besides…” I whispered when I needed to pull away from her lips to pant, thanks to her ministrations on my member. “I’m aching for you.” That earned me a mischievous smirk from the woman in my arms. Before I could even question it, she had already turned around, bent over the counter and pulled the skirt of her dress up, exposing her panties-clad pussy to me.

“Just pull it to the side and get in me.” Fuck. This was it, this is how I was going to die. Hypnotized, I reached out to trace her outer lips, easily visible through the ruined cotton thanks to her wetness. It made her moan, holding tighter onto the marble before looking back over her shoulder to watch me as I slowly moved the fabric away.

Bit by bit, I fed her my cock, moving at a snail’s pace mostly because it felt like I’d tear her in two if I decided to abruptly bottom out inside of her. “Was this what you wanted?” I asked, still transfixed by the sight of her pussy so hungrily accepting my cock, especially when I reached around her to stimulate her clit and ease it in.

“Yes.” The way she said it, the wrecked state that was so clear in her voice, had me looking up to meet her eyes and finding her staring back at me with nothing but need. 

“You’re so ready to be ruined, huh?”

“By you. Only if it’s by you.” A shiver went down my spine at the combination of her words and the feeling of my first thrust into her. It felt delicious, so overwhelmingly tight that I automatically thrusted into her again, then again and again.

“Yes,” she moaned again, bracing herself on the counter, and with that last confirmation I started to move frantically in and out of her, desperate to bring her the pleasure she’d been denied for so long. Desperate to possess her in the way I’d always dreamed to do.

It was like nothing I’d imagined. It was a thousand times better, to be this connected to the woman I loved, the woman I’d longed to have for so long. Everything was so intense, heightened even further by the power of the emotions flowing through me, that I felt tears rising to my eyes at the thought of this being it, this being the only time I’d get to have her like this - despite whatever reassurances she tried to give me before we kissed. I needed to hear it again.

“Tell me you want me. I need to hear that you need me just as much as I need you,” I begged, a hand curled over her throat as I pulled her body away from the counter and against my chest. “Promise me this isn’t just a one time thing, that you’re not going to leave this bathroom and go back to him after we’re done.”

This time, when our eyes met, it was through the mirror, and I could see the love in mine reflected back in hers, calming my anxieties instantly. “I want you, Steve,” she confided, and I believed her. Of course I believed her. “I want only you, Steve. You’re all I’ve ever wanted.”

Then I allowed myself to become fully immersed in her, taking in the smell of sex that had flooded the tiny bathroom, the sounds of our animalistic coupling reverberating off the walls.

“You’re so beautiful,” I groaned when I found myself enthralled by the image looking at me from the mirror, her lips open and bruised, indentations from my teeth in them. She looked exactly how I described, ruined, and it was all because of me. “Do you see this? Look at yourself, c’mon.”

The hand that remained around her neck while I pounded her tightened slightly, only enough to startle her into obeying me. “See?” I questioned, eyes meeting hers in the mirror, while my other hand went around her body to play with her clit again. “So damn hot.”

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I could barely recognize the image staring back at me, with her messy hair and glossy eyes, the satisfied look in her face enough to get me even more aroused. Behind me, Steve kept his harsh thrusts while looking at the scene we both created, his hand choking me slightly. 

“How do you think he’d react if he saw just how deeply I’m fucking you?” The question caught me by surprise. For a second, I couldn’t even understand who was the “he” Steve was talking about. It felt like I was his already. Anyone else was merely a secondary character in our story.

His voice was thick as he continued to taunt the man that was still waiting for me outside, the man I’d completely forgotten about ever since Steve kissed me. “How do you think he’d react if he saw just how deeply I’m fucking you? Do you think he’d cry?”

I honestly didn’t know - and didn’t want to think about it. All I knew was that tears were falling down my cheeks from how brutally Steve was ramming me, making me lean away from his chest and brace myself on the counter again. 

I barely had the time to warn him that I was cumming, because as my mouth opened to say something,  my pussy was already milking him for his own orgasm. I felt his spent painting my insides, warming me up, a physical reminder that this entire moment was, in fact, very real.

My eyes caught my reflection and once more I was taken by surprise by the figure that stared back at me. There was absolutely no denying I’d been roughly fucked, and even if the state of my dress or the mess in my hair didn’t give that away, the satisfied expression in my face made it very clear.

I closed my eyes only for a second, trying to calm down my breathing and figure out where to go from here, but almost immediately, Steve’s fingers were tightening around my hips, calling for my attention.

“Don’t fall asleep on me, sweetheart.” His deep chuckle elicited one of my own, but since his cock was still nestled deep inside of me, the reverberations running through my body ended up turning it into a moan. “Fuck, I don’t want to leave this pussy to deal with that one, but I really should.”

My eyes widened as I realized what he was saying. “You… You’d really do that for me?” He was okay with talking to Tom so I wouldn’t have to look at him, fear his reaction as I announced we were done?

I knew it was weak of me, but I was vulnerable at that moment. I needed this support, as cowardice as it may seem. And Steve understood it apparently, if the way he kissed my neck to relax me was any indication.

“I’d do anything for you. Dealing with that man will be more of a personal pleasure… I don’t make any promises about his physical integrity when I’m done with him, though.” I thought back to some hard memories that I’d have to carry with me due to my relationship with Tom, and I found that I was sincerely okay with whatever it was that Steve would do to him.

Seeing Steve prepare to leave me was hard, though. Having him inside of me, having his warm presence left me feeling safe and supported. Knowing I’d have to be without him, at least for a few minutes, made me cold. 

It was like he knew it, because just before leaving, he turned around to look me in the eye and confirmed, “Meet you back in my room?” That had me opening up a smile to him, nodding in excitement. And I couldn’t resist teasing him one last time, hopefully leaving some interesting thoughts to get him back to me as soon as possible.

“I’ll be waiting on all fours.”

[misstalwyn]

FORBIDDEN WEST THOUGHTS 2, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

I’m literally on the dot at 50.2 percent completion so I figure it’s a good time bc idk what plot could follow what I know now, so

SPOILERS AGAIN

Ok, listen, y’all know Avad’s #1 in my heart but HOLY FUCK does Kotallo make a challenge for the throne!!

I don’t know how they keep making all the different varieties of ideal™️ men but goddamnit does Aloy keep finding them! Don’t be selfish girl leave some for the rest of us!! 🥺

he does such a quick heel turn from “ugh the chief is making me help an outlander” to “hello commander reporting for duty” AND I! JUST!!

KOTALLO!!!

love me a man that will wrestle a machine with chainsaws for teeth and also demand chocolate frosting as a ration

“That was an unkind comparison” YOUR HONOR, I LOVE HIM

it was a really great tone/motivation to have that whole plot just be “let’s go take this asshole down a peg”

and WHERE is aloy learning to curse so much now?? i’m not crazy, right? she’s telling people off left and right! i love it but goddamn, i think rost would be PISSED lol

can I just say, the Tenakth are a pretty fascinating group for a violent bunch. They’re just historians with a fixation on military doctrine! If they just stopped killing each other over everything, they’d really have the mettle to challenge the Carja

(But pls don’t do that Avad is really trying to keep the peace YALL 😭)

anyways I really liked how their section went, and I only did a couple side quests after the kulrut and haven’t touched the arena, so we’ll see if it impresses me even more

The Utaru I initially really liked, but then I realized that was just Zo selling them really well bc a lot of their npcs were rude and their leadership don’t seem to believe in having any agency, soooo

I can see why Zo just completely lost faith in them immediately lmao

Again tho, didn’t do any post-main story missions there yet, so we shall see!

Kue was cool, tho! I would go hang out with that settlement more if they get more quests tbh

I will say I thought Beta’s defection was pretty clever, idk how I knew the whole thing with the 237 immediately lol but I will happily take my pride on that one

I don’t feel bad but also kinda feel bad for laughing at the immortal woman with centuries of tech at her fingertips just to be stabbed to death by a tribal dude with a knife 😂

all that money and still no sense!!

but Beta’s issues, man

MAN,,,,

I’m well past her breakdown by now too and yknow her deal must be beyond complex if everyone in that base and Aloy included has been thru some kind of lasting trauma, and they’re all just throwing their hands up at her

I hate to meme about it but when i get to meet tilda i’m just gonna be like, “look at this clone you made, she’s got anxiety”

Anyways, I hope someone can get her some good help bc idk if GAIA is designed for therapy lol

(They SHOULD get her a real name, first things first!)

I’ve complained about the pacing/freedom of movement enough so far, but I’m still very confused at the why/where’s/how’s of it?

Like, the leveling up through the base felt fine, nothing was head and shoulders above me and they only threw the big bois at you w/the plot

But by the kulrut, I was starting to get side missions & errands that were 5-10 levels above me, in areas with super aggressive machines I was very unprepared for

and then the tremortusk mission felt very…. Easy? And I realized I was actually OVERLEVELED for it?? even tho everything else in the area wasn’t???

I don’t understand how the plot can be pushing me forward so much, and yet here I am at tide’s reach getting level 20 side missions at level 41, even tho I just fought a level 40 vampire bat!!

Like, what! How are you supposed to get this far and be simultaneously babied and bullied? HOW??

idk, I felt like HZD had it right just having each area set at a certain difficulty, so you could just mentally sort it out like, “okay, I can handle the maizelands at my level, and if I wanna relax I can go back to the embrace,” and so on

Everyone who said the pacing was great in reviews clearly meant the plot bc, well, no arguments there lol but oh boy does my general gameplay pacing get so thrown off when I struggle in a cauldron 5 levels above me for an hour bc GAIA HERSELF CALLED AND TOLD ME TO DO IT!

and then I walk 10 feet outside to find an NPC begging me to help them with a fetch quest literally 15 levels beneath me 😬

MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

Anyway speaking of yikes, that lady at the biotech facility just got totally gaslit into thinking BIOMASS CONVERSION (the thing that doomed the world) WAS GOOD?? JUST GOTTA KEEP OUTDOING YOUR OWN SHIT, EH TED???

Y I K E S

anyways good on that person who resigned halfway thru, I respect them and only them in that environment

Alva is cool tho! And I mean that in the nerdiest, most awkward way possible lol

I gotta be honest, when I saw people mention her I thought she was supposed to be Beta bc no one understandably mentioned Beta and I thought Alva sounded close enough to Aloy that it meant they had picked a new name for her bc Beta feels kinda insulting to keep tbh

Anyways, her people sound neat, idk how i feel about hanging out with them since they worship elisabet herself?? that twist was really well done but goddamn the LOOK in aloy’s eyes when she realized “oh, not again!” lmaooo

I have also fought the monkeys. i hate the monkeys. i thought they were weird jungle cats for a little bit too lol 

I REALLY didn't expect to be at the coast already with how much more western space i still have blank on my map? but i guess, erosion is kind of the silent machine here? neat

as a native Californian, i would guess that’s just north of the bay, but its so far north i almost wanna say Eureka?? idk, but i will say theres quite a few places north and south that have that many redwoods, so i was kinda sad there were no datapoints ID’ing it

i wanna see if i can recognize everything now lol, i don't wanna leave its so pretty!! but i did reluctantly go back just to throw demeter back into gaia and its looking like i have a big chunk of plot left, huh? jesus, i really might not finish before the 18th oop

[stanfordsweater]

@aftershocked

moving this here because you’ve brought up a TON of points i’d love to dig into and the tumblr reply system is garbage--

(under the cut: much talk of possessive sam vs. possessive dean, benefits of a long-running series, ooc actions vs. consistent characterization)

“they change a lot over 15 seasons but it's consistent enough” i feel like differences and inconsistencies in episodes/writing/seasons are one of the reasons (besides personal preference) that ppl get twisted around when it comes to possessive sam and possessive dean, like it’s easy to focus on one or two things w/o taking larger patterns or predominant characteristics into account.

also it’s easy to focus on like, smth happening a few times that is in contradiction to something that happened many other times, & not want to Deal with the complexities & contradictions—but the complexities are the best part! i’ve seen you talk about it before too, the benefits of a longrunning series where we get to really watch the characters grow from young men to essentially middle-aged,

you get to actually have characters w the kind of multifaceted personalities you’d expect of, like, normal people (just way more fucked up and traumatized). so yeah, dean isn’t always straightforward in the way he’s content with keeping sam with him, and can dip into weird behavior (ESPECIALLY in the sort of parental “i make the decisions around here” sense)—

but his general preference, his base character, does not lean towards possessiveness at all. versus sam, who SEEMS like he’d be more grounded and chill, but is actually the crazy jealous guy. that kind of irony, those kind of subversions, are what make them enjoyable as characters and contribute to why possessive sam is so much fun to explore,

bc you Wouldn’t think he’d be the one who’s jealous enough that even when dean gives sam so much of himself already, sam still wants more. you’d look at him and expect him to be the brother capable of letting go, of being halfway normal, instead of like, sam’s built so much on seeking dean’s approval and lived his life at the center of dean’s universe,

so he’ll reject anything that threatens to change that dynamic. like the contradictions are weird and spicy and i like them a lot and god i love sam’s reactions to benny so much. i’d feel bad bc i really like benny & he deserved better, but it’s too much fun to see how much sam of all people unreasonably, irrationally, illogically hates the guy,

just because he represents someone dean might, might, might possibly actually like more than sam (even though we, the viewers, know that’s impossible). beautiful

--

yes, you’ve hit on so many great points here! firstly, the inconsistencies in characterization: i think it’s very easy to see why people get annoyed by the writing, and i do think it’s occasionally justified; however, i’ve always found it a lot more rewarding to think about it as the same kind of inconsistencies that real people have! sam and dean might make “ooc” decisions and it’s okay because real people do that too, out of anger, resentment, sadness, trauma... it makes sense, to me, that they aren’t the same people they were fifteen years ago. getting stuck in one ‘mode’ of characterization is damaging to an overall reading of the show, but at the same time it’s okay to latch onto one era if that’s what you enjoy. it only bothers me when people take characterization from one era (for example, dean’s ptsd, anger, and jealousy over amelia) and apply it to every version of that character.

dean’s parental sense of possession over sam is one thing i do agree with wrt the possessive dean takes, and i think they’re more memorable for a lot of people because they’re not what you usually see from a family show-- it’s weird for dean to feel that way, and i don’t know if i’ve ever seen that intersection of parental ownership and romantic partner jealousy. it’s important that this comes out when dean is under pressure, not all the time-- AND it’s essential that sam does not cave to this. it gets iffy during dabb era, but i still don’t see sam immediately caving to dean’s demands. a good example is the scene where dean holds a gun to sam in season 15, which i see fairly often as an example of dean demanding obedience from sam... but sam doesn’t cave! and sam doesn’t even flinch, because he’s used to having guns pointed at him, and he knows that no version of dean could ever kill him. dean knows this too, and dean is the one who caves, as per usual. this is only not the case a few times in canon, like season 4, parts of season 7, and season 9, all for different reasons i won’t get into now. it’s remarkable when dean doesn’t go along with what sam asks, which is why it sticks in people’s memories, imo. dean is very loud with what he wants and what he thinks is best, but if sam disagrees he will argue dean around to his point, or he’ll go behind dean’s back to do it anyway (case in point, season 11 with the cage.)

anyway-- “the complexities are the best part!” and “you get to actually have characters w the kind of multifaceted personalities you’d expect of, like, normal people (just way more fucked up and traumatized). so yeah, dean isn’t always straightforward...” TOTALLY AGREE. i love the times when the brothers are making decisions that fandom disagrees with, because it’s interesting. the show is here to provide a compelling story. i’m not going to lie and say i always agree with that story or those choices, but it’s fun for me to try to get into why a character would make that decision, not just rail against it. i like the dudes we have in canon! they’re fun!

this is why possessive sam slaps for me. what you said here-- “sam, who SEEMS like he’d be more grounded and chill, but is actually the crazy jealous guy. that kind of irony, those kind of subversions, are what make them enjoyable as characters and contribute to why possessive sam is so much fun to explore” yes yes yes. 100%. and we see these subversions right from season one! it’s not new that dean isn’t actually the uber-confident womanizing asshole, but if you aren’t paying attention it can sneak up on you, i guess? and sam, who comes across as the level-headed one in common archetypes, the soft-spoken college boy, crashes the impala into a building. in the first episode. and in route 666, he  follows a crazy instinct that is proven correct and saves their lives (because he’s intelligent!) but toys with the chance that it could have failed and killed dean (because he’s reckless!)

the fact that we have all these examples of the ways the brothers fail to fulfill the tropes they would in a less-interesting tv show means that possessive sam makes so much sense. sam is built up as the independent brother, the one who left home, the rebellious one, but he loves his family and he needs dean. he needs him. “sam’s built so much on seeking dean’s approval and lived his life at the center of dean’s universe...” i love the way you put this. sam has had dean’s attention and protection for most of his life, and hell if he’s giving it up now for some two-bit vampire, lol. sam is independent, but like with everything else, dean is the exception. sam’s desperation for dean’s approval and attention is absolutely hilarious in the benny situation, because, like you’ve said before, benny is the least-threatening dude ever. he’s so nice. and the fact that sam won’t rest until he dies is-- well, i’m being a little uncharitable, i don’t think sam wanted benny to die, but he sure didn’t shed any tears over it.

the contradictions are delicious. i do think some of it is that dean gets his friendships fulfilled outside of sam, so sam is in a category all his own, while sam doesn’t have as many relationships as dean does so dean is fills all of his categories. but then again, that isn’t always true. it shifts over the seasons and even through episodes. broad trends!

[sritzthefirefly]

The Not-so French Mistake

Pairing: Slight Dean x reader

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: Language

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Supernatural. Any and all comments on this are appreciated. I’m sorry for any grammatical errors that I might have made. This is my first fanfiction (as a one-shot, I've written a few earlier in poetry form) so please go easy on me.

“You are going to die.”, he states nonchalantly, as if three men entering your house and telling you that you are going to die is an everyday occurrence.

“I…WHAT?!”, I shout, my eyes round as saucers.

Well, today was a seemingly normal day. Until the seemingly normal day wasn’t as seemingly normal as I thought it would be.

                                2 hours earlier

“Hey, I’ll be leaving now”, my best friend said as she packed the small handbag she always carried around with her.

“Don’t forget the pickle jar and then come back 15 minutes later telling me you forgot the one thing I reminded you about”, I shouted to her from the top of the stairs.

She turned around to pick up the jar from the centre table when her eyes landed on me and she whistled. I pulled the drawstrings of my silk dressing gown tighter as I walked down the stairs.

“Ooooh, would you look at that, someone’s looking good. So, are you going to sleep after I’m gone, or are you going to have some company tonight?”

“I…..I just can’t……not so soon after...ummm……I know I’m stupid but I just wanted to feel good about myself”

She closed the few steps between us and hugged me tightly.

“Hey, you know he’s an asshole. His words don’t count, ok? No guy has the right to make you feel bad about yourself”, she said, pulling away.

“But he…….”

“No missy, you listen here, he’s an idiot who doesn’t deserve you. He should feel lucky he’s not in town or I would’ve kicked him so hard in the balls that impregnating a woman would’ve been a foreign concept to him.”

I gave her a small smile.

“Thanks for hyping me up, love. I’m now going to have ice cream and cry my heart out to sad rom-coms.”

“Bitch, you hate rom-coms. You’re just going to binge-watch Supernatural and you’re not telling me that because you won’t admit that you’re obsessed with the show”.

“Okay, okay whatever……Aren’t you getting late for your train?”

 She looked at her watch.

 “Oh shit! Bye, see you later.” she said as she ran out of the door, slamming it behind her. I sighed to myself and walked over to the TV, switching it on.

“Self-care time for me now!”, I said to myself, as I opened the fridge to get my favorite ice-cream when suddenly, the doorbell rings. I immediately turned my head towards the centre table and sure enough, the pickle jar was there.

Shaking my head, I picked up her precious jar and walked over to the door, pulling it open.

“I knew you……..”, I stopped short when I saw who was standing outside.

There, standing on my porch were, none other than, Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki.

And then I woke up.

Yeah, if only it happened that way.

I knew I was looking like an absolute fool in front of them, opening and closing my mouth like a fish, my eyes wide and my breath short as I stood there, taking in the two handsome men adorning my doorstep. They were dressed in their Sam and Dean outfits -plaid, over layers of plaid- it seemed like a scene straight out of a set.

“Hi! You’re Y/N right?”, Jared said in his usual husky voice while Jensen stood beside him, strangely staring at me with something akin to awe in his eyes.

“W…what? I…uh…yeah…I…I am Y/N”, I somehow managed to choke out.

“You’re awesome”, Jensen Ackles breathed out with a sigh with literal heart-eyes in my direction. He cleared his throat and blinked twice and then seemed to step out of his reverie. He gave me a small smile and looked me up and down with a small smirk and I blushed furiously. Wait, was Jensen Ackles checking me out?!

Okay, so there were either of these two things going on- either I was dreaming or I had completely lost my mind. But since I had already pinched myself and well, that damn pinch did hurt, so the situation pretty much tilted towards the latter side. I mean, Jensen Ackles knows me and he thinks I am awesome?!

“Yep, definitely not a fan”, Jared whispers somewhat sarcastically to Jensen to which he replies under his breath with a “Shut up, Sammy!”

I would have paid more attention to what Jensen said had I not had my whole focus on Jared’s last words.

“Ummm…..excuse me? No offense but I’m standing right here and you can rest assured that I am 100% a fan, of both of you. If you don’t believe me, ask me anything about Supernatural.”, I say, crossing my hands across my chest.

“Wha-Supernatural? Like the book Supernatural? You have that here too?”, Jensen asks seemingly surprised.

Alright, is this a game for their show? I thought to myself, utterly confused and dazed. They seem to know my name and well, address too and that can be the only logical explanation as to why Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki are here, on my doorstep. But I couldn’t see any cameras nearby. Maybe they were hidden? Maybe I was meant to be taken by surprise? Oh shit, did I just challenge them right now? Was this being filmed? My mind rushed with a million things- ‘Oh god, I must be looking so stupid right now, acting like a blobfish instead of doing anything!’

I opened my mouth to say something, anything at all, when Jared cut through. 

“Ummm I’m sorry, Y/N, but it’s not really a good idea to be standing outside and talking. I promise we’ll explain everything. Can we please come inside and talk?”

“I….uh…..yeah sure. Come inside please.”, I was about to ask what their deal was but changed my mind when I saw Jensen nervously looking around and then back at me, pleadingly. 

I closed the door behind me as they settled on the plush red sofa. I walked across the room and sat on the chair facing them.

“Y/N”, Jared started. “There’s no easy way to say this but I’m Sam Winchester and this is my brother Dean. Like, from Supernatural.”

“Ummm…. I’m aware? Despite your contrary belief, I told you I was a fan.”, I said, confused.

“You’re our fan?!”, Jensen asked, somewhat stunned. “Haha sweetheart, am I living my dream!”, he added, his emerald eyes twinkling.

I stared at him through my eyelashes.

“Hold up, quick question, are you a Dean girl or Sam girl?”

“Dean, not now…..”, Jared sighed.

“Dean girl!”, I blurted out, immediately blushing deeply. Jensen’s entire face lit up and I hurriedly added, “No offense to Jared here.”

“Jared? You mean Jared Pada-whatshisname?”, Jensen asked incredulously.

“Padalecki, Dean”

“Son of a bitch! Fake us lives in the same universe as her!”

I started laughing and the both of them turned towards me quizzically.

“Ummm what is this? Some spin-off of The French Mistake?”, I asked.

“The French what?”, Jared looked at me, his eyebrow raised.

“That’s not important right now. Y/N, I know, it’s hard to believe us right now, but we are not your TV actors-we are not Jensen and Jared. I am the actual Dean Winchester and he is my brother, Sam Winchester. The trickster, the archangel Gabriel, owed us a favor and he let us travel into your universe.... Sweetheart please, you have to believe me. I umm uh, I have been a-”

I stood straight up from my chair, angrily.

“I’m sorry but what kind of prank is this? Going to people’s houses and-”, I started angrily when suddenly the entire room got spontaneously flooded with an immensely bright light.

“Cover your eyes!”, a deep, somewhat robotic voice filled the air and I immediately did so to lessen the risk of my precious peepers being completely burned out by an unknown source of dazzling light in my seemingly normal house in the middle of a seemingly normal (absolutely weird) day.

Slowly, the light faded.

And there stood Misha Collins-

No, that could not possibly be Misha. Unless Misha had suddenly evolved to be able to exhibit bioluminescence or had sprouted long black wings from the back of his trench coat or had learned to hover like a bee in mid-air. No, definitely not Misha. 

That means, this must…this must be-

“Holy mother of God”, I gasped out.

“I….am….not….the….I am the son of God”, he said, walking across the room to sit beside Jar-no, no......Sam.

Holy shit! CASTIEL?! That means that all this time, Jens- Dean, had not been lying. I collapsed on my chair, my mind, not being able to form a single coherent thought. Dean leaped up from the sofa and rushed to my side.

“Darling….darling, look for yourself, that-”

“He is Castiel.”, I said, boring into Dean’s green eyes, they brought me comfort. “I believe you…… Dean.”

A look passed between Sam and Dean and Dean immediately held my hand and squeezed my palm as an act of reassurance as he beamed at me.

Sam got up from his chair and smiled at me, “Thanks to Cas here, you believe us. At last. I thought you were two seconds away from throwing us out.”

I snorted. A really ugly snort through my nose. In front of three delicious-looking men, especially Dean, who was somehow still looking at me like I was God’s gift to mankind. Hah, no wonder I was single.

I cleared my throat to relieve the awkwardness and continued,

“Well, in my defense, you guys were acting real creepy.”

Yeah sure, not even in my wildest dreams would I actually throw Jensen and Jared out of my house, no matter how creepy they act, but they didn’t need to know that.

“But how…why……..”, I started asking the questions bothering me.

“Umm well, yeah, about that…”, Dean started, gulping.

Castiel walked over and looked at me with downcast eyes.

“You are going to die.”, he stated nonchalantly, as if three men entering into your house and telling you that you are going to die is an everyday occurrence.

“I…WHAT?!”, I shouted, my eyes wide.

                                        Now

“CAS!”, Sam and Dean both exclaim at him at the same time.

“She was asking.…..”

“No Cas, not like that!”, Sam tells him prickly.

“Please tell me what the hell is going on! Why….How am I going to die? What’s happening?!”, I say, hiding my face with my hair.

“Darling, promise me you won’t freak out.”, Dean says, staring straight into my soul. “You are a character from a book in our universe. My favourite book. And trust me, this...you…. I am a huge fan of you. Have been, since I was a child. Now you see, few months ago, we stumbled into your universe when Gabriel pranked us. And then I saw you. I met you. The real you....just….perfect….And I just wanted to.....I mean..... I came back...I came back because…..”

“Because?”

“I know everything. I know how the book ends and I have come back here to save you, darling.”

Tagging -  @thatmotleygirl @msmarvelouswinchester @athenapotter @mvdeanw​ @bts-spnlvr12​ @holylulusworld @jensengirl83

[we-pay-for-everything]

It’s interesting how Stefan and Elena deal with Damon’s death in similar ways. Stefan gave up on searching for Damon because he felt it was pointless and that he had to move on, so he “started over” in a new town, working for an asshole at a repair shop and dating a normal girl. He was punishing himself for giving up on Damon and that’s why he ignored his friends and wouldn’t let himself go back to Mystic Falls. He even let himself get mistreated by a boss he could easily compel. He was obviously ashamed and felt like a bad brother, but you can’t fault him for giving up. He was grieving. I can’t imagine what it’s like you lose your brother, especially one who you thought would live forever so you wasted so much time hating and resenting him. Like Stefan said, Damon was finally happy and had changed for the better when he died. He and Stefan had become close again too. It’s unfair, because, all those years, all Stefan had wanted was his brother back. He finally had him and thought he had decades left to make up for lost time yet lost him just like that. So, yeah, Stefan’s grief is worse than Elena’s because he has so many regrets and old wounds that were reopened by Damon’s death. There are so many things he said and did to Damon that he can’t take back and so much time they could’ve spent together had they not both been so stubborn. Regret and guilt are the worse - they destroy you completely.

But Elena handled Damon’s death a bit like Stefan. First, she had hope - in her case, it was more like denial - and she hallucinated Damon to cope, but, then, when she realized it wasn’t working (she almost killed people), she tried to start afresh and erase his memory - similar to Stefan, except she took it literally. It says a lot about Stefan though, and the magnitude of his grief, that he didn’t even try to discourage Elena from forgetting about his brother. He understood her completely.

I enjoyed the scenes where Ric compelled Elena. Seeing Stefan handle things just as badly as Elena made me understand her decision better. I thought Elena finally seemed like her old self, and looking back at her memories of Damon cleared up a lot of questions I had about their relationship. I didn’t buy into it 100%, but most of it made sense to me. 

The first time Elena felt that Damon was sexy was in the Miss Mystic Falls pageant - this tracks because you can see her attraction for him in that scene; when she first met Damon she was “scared”, but a good scared, thrilled - this makes sense too because she’s remembering the real first time they met, when she was just a happy teenager who still had her parents and would naturally find a hot older guy exciting; when Damon and her first kissed she felt bad because of Stefan - true; when she kissed Damon at the motel she really wanted to kiss him - duh; she first found out she was in love with Damon when she learned about the sire bond, yet knew her feelings were real - again, true. All of this is true, yet sort of erases every bad thing Damon did when she was with Stefan and how confused she was by Damon and by her feelings for him. However, the girl lost her boyfriend, so she wouldn’t be thinking about their rocky past - none of that is relevant in the face of his death and her grief. 

What’s really interesting though, is the memory that is apparently the key to erasing all her feelings for Damon: the real first time she knew she loved Damon. She denied her feelings for Damon all throughout season 3 so it makes sense she wouldn’t want to admit to when she actually started having feelings for him. Like Caroline said, we all know they started when she was in love with Stefan, and Elena is a very faithful person who really loved Stefan and didn’t mean to fall for Damon too. However, I thought Elena first realizing she was in love with Damon at her 18th birthday party was a bit of reach. But I think the phrasing is key here: she fell for him “in that moment”. Elena said Damon had never been as selfless as when he gave her Stefan’s necklace back, even though it stung, just because he loved her and knew what the necklace meant for her - hope, protection, her connection with Stefan. Elena was obviously moved at the time, as she was every time Damon showed his selfless side, or proved to be someone she could rely on. Elena is very loyal, like I said, and I think she felt attracted to Damon in season 3 because he was also loyal and devoted to Stefan. 

Regardless, I don’t honestly think she fell in love with Damon so early in the season, and the writers might have been retconning their relationship a bit to make it look more epic. Because it's hard to believe Elena realized she loved Damon, and that her love scared her, as far back as the first episode of season 3. Even if it was only in that moment, and something she subsequently erased from her mind, Elena didn’t seem at all scared at the party and didn’t even try to push Damon away - and we know she would’ve had she felt for even a second that she loved Damon (she did it in later episodes). I’ll just choose to interpret her words differently. “In that moment” (as she emphasized), Elena loved Damon, I would say platonically more than romantically, yet those feelings of attraction, which she could at least readily admit to having, flared up when Damon gave her the necklace, and that scared her. I think this makes much more sense from Elena’s pov. 

Okay, I’m done now. 

[heavymetalchemist]

I agree w/ some points u made in ur meta abt jiang cheng, but wwx wasnt just a sworn brother. they literally grew up side by side and yet he was wilfully blind to wwx's nature that should have made jc trust him: wwx's goodness, his tenacity, his selflessness. jc knew him and yet in his grief and anger and haste to blame someone he pours it all on his brother who, as selfless and self-loathing as he is, accepts all the blame. It's not abt the lie, but that jc chose to believe the lie.

I’m guessing this is in response to this post and to clarify, Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian ARE brothers, and I didn’t mean to diminish that by comparing the blind trust to Lan Xichen and the Venerated Triad.

However, here’s the thing, like, what lie are we talking about? Because the lie I’m referring to in that post is multifaceted:

Your golden core has been restored by Baoshan Sanren

I’m totally fine

I can absolutely control all this resentful energy and this new cultivation method isn’t hurting me at all

I don’t carry my sword any more because I don’t feel like it, even though it is very publicly rude of me not to

You cannot rely on me to help you run the sect because I am off in a tavern drinking all day, stumbling home drunk, but again, I’m totally fine and have nothing to discuss with you about my mental state at all, I swear I am just a fun-loving guy!

I have said before on my blog that I don’t like good person/bad person dichotomy, for a number of reasons, but primarily because it implies a static state of being and causes a willful blindness to harm people cause. People are complex, and while I do think intent matters, it’s not magic. Wei Wuxian gives up his golden core for Jiang Cheng, with all the good intentions in the world, but he does this without consulting Jiang Cheng, lying to him about it, drugging him to perform experimental surgery, dealing with the trauma of three months in the burial mounds and not having a core alone and absolutely refusing and rebuffing every overture Jiang Cheng makes trying to figure out what’s wrong with him, causing a lot of political problems with his behavior that Jiang Cheng then has to smooth over (and the Jiang sect is in a very fragile place, politically), then busting into a prison camp and killing ALL the guards with a fierce corpse and running off to the burial mounds with the last of the Wen cultivators.

And even with all of this, Jiang Cheng still defends and cares about him, they have that entire staged fight after Wei Wuxian insists on leaving the Jiang sect, which to Jiang Cheng is a betrayal of his promise to be with him in leading the sect, but Wei Wuxian does not tell Jiang Cheng about the whole surgery thing so he really doesn’t have a clue about how much Wen Qing and Wen Ning did for him (although, of course, if he had known about it he would never have let them do it, I’m sure).

From Jiang Cheng’s perspective, how is he supposed to trust in this goodness and selflessness? WWX is throwing the Jiang sect under the bus. WWX is not helping rebuild the sect, he’s drinking all day. (Of course he’s traumatized, they’re ALL traumatized, but he’s not talking about it so how can JC help?) WWX murders a bunch of Jin sect cultivators, running off with a bunch of prisoners of war, from the sect that attempted a full-scale genocide of the Jiang sect. (And to be clear I do not condemn this action and think that Blood Feuds Are Bad, however, in context this is a world where blood feuds are a very real thing. Personally I like the AU where they get Nie Mingjue on their side, as the Nie sect actually has a lot of power that the Jiang sect simply doesn’t, and therefore they can protect the Wen remnants that way. But I digress.)

Not to mention, WWX is using demonic cultivation, corpses are running around, he’s thrumming with resentful energy. Not a good look.

And then Jin Zixuan gets his heart punched out. In CQL there’s a second flautist, but in the book he simply loses control (the control he SWORE he had) and even in CQL it’s not like we find out about the second flautist until the end. How is JC supposed to trust in WWX’s goodness when he’s just murdered his brother-in-law? When he’s abandoned his family and sect for the people that murdered them? (YES I know the Dafan Wens weren’t involved in actively killing people but this is the whole blood-feud-thing, audience knowledge is not character knowledge, etc.)

And then at Nightless City, WWX loses control AGAIN (or at least appears to), three thousand people get murdered, Yanli dies, and JC STILL can’t actually stab him. JC was DESPERATE for any sort of explanation or reason of why this was all happening, but over and over WWX said it was fine, and the real takeaway for JC by the time Nightless City rolls around is - this man is not the boy I grew up with, this man is no longer my brother, my brother would NEVER do this would NEVER hurt Yanli, so it can’t be him any more.

It’s not unlike knowing someone who becomes addicted to drugs. Someone you knew and loved becomes an alcoholic and their whole life goes up in flames and then they’re drunk driving and then they kill someone doing it, and how long are you supposed to sit there while they destroy themselves, telling yourself that you know they’re a good person on the inside?

Now all that said, on the OTHER hand, if you’re talking about the lies that the other sect leaders were spouting, about how WWX was speaking against JC, about how he doesn’t respect him, etc?  You are SO right and it pains me so much that JC didn’t have the ability to stand up to those assholes and say “He’s my brother, shut the fuck up” a la Yanli to Zixun at Phoenix Mountain. Even with all the crap going on in the background, it was obvious to the other (older!) sect leaders that WWX was very powerful and very close to JC and they deliberately tried to undermine the Jiang sect and I hate them. That plays into a lot of the trauma that JC personally has but yes, I think that’s one of the failings that haunts him - how could I have listened to their poisoned words at all?

[bibbykins]

can u give us a glimpse into what arguing w/ the princes would be like? love ur work btw!!

You bet! I actually had something written about this ages ago but never finished it so I’ll paste it here and add some more!

Warnings: 18+ (just like my whole page and all my works are)This is where the toxicity and unhealthiness of these relationships show, manipulation, yelling, lying, mentions of sex, mentions of rough sex, mentions of various sexual acts (cunnilingus, fellatio, exhibition) I beg of you to not put up with any of this shit irl let fiction stay in the fictional world yknow? I always ramble in my fics about this but I figured I should add it here for good measure

Jin:

Where the other boys rarely ever just “argue” and it is either a fight or nothing, you guys just argue sometimes, never rlly fight

This ties back to the fierce honesty policy you have between each other, but you both are so stubborn so arguing does happen

You both usually start by saying snarky things until one of you breaks and says what is really bothering them, which doesn’t take long at all

If you cry, congrats, you automatically won bc Jin not only does not know how to deal with a woman’s tears, he cannot fathom his one true love crying

Although you usually try to continue explaining your reasoning bc you don’t wanna win by crying, you wanna win bc you’re right

Jin, similar to Jimin, respects you a lot, so the other girls seldom ever catch him acting like a clown’

His downfall is just being bad at expressing his feelings bc he thinks you just know, like you read minds or something

Jin usually apologizes by asking what you want after he forfeits his pride so if it’s a gift, he’s on it, sex? say less. 

He usually prefers to pamper you for a night, not even cumming during sex unless you tell him to

You’re the one who threatens the other fellas when they’re disrespecting their s/o, intentionally or not, and boy are they frightened. You rlly have a way with insults

Yoongi:

Bickers with you, but doesn't fight and everyone does not understand how bc he’s so standoffish to everyone else

Bc your relationship has the most public eyes on it, gossip columns are floored when they cannot find flaws or rumors of fights, and most are too intimidated by Yoongi to just make them up

You both read each other like a book, so the only time anything comes up is if you don’t like what you’re reading at that moment and vice versa, then a fight might start but it is shockingly rare

If he makes you cry, the fight is over, he lost. Yes, this is a running theme among the guys bc they are all whipped dummies

Very perceptive of your feelings, so never really worries about fighting with you or you hiding anything from him

You know how to get him to fess up so it's not the worst system of communication (still not healthy in the slightest but that’s the yandere life here)

He doesn't really try to lie to you or hide anything since you're also pretty bonkers so if he destroyed someone’s career bc he thought they looked at funny, you just roll your eyes and tell him he’s silly

You are the one that Jungkook and Taehyung are terrified of (It’s just about all the hyungline gf’s they are rlly scared of)

You’re usually so bubbly and energetic, but if you get pissed off, you’re as frightening if not more frightening than Yoongi

I should add Yoongi prefers to make up by marathon eating you out, at some point, it feels like he’s getting a kick out of it, but you’re in no place to complain tbh

Hoseok:

Not a lot of fighting here tbh bc you are still healing and your talent is in deescalating situations and telling people’s feeling

Your job is literally a behavior analyst so you will just deadass be like, “I can tell you’re getting frustrated to a point where effective communication won’t be possible, so how can I help calm you down?”

Makes him go silent real quick and reevaluate everything he has ever thought or done

For this reason, he just sighs and apologizes, genuinely bc you can absolutely tell when he’s just saying it to shut you up

He is the only one that will allow you to leave (the room, not the house) not that you want to leave the building considering the dangers you know are out there

Once you both cool off, you’ll have him state what he thought about and vice versa

You give advice to all the girls on how to do this, but not all of them are brave enough to try

So you go full mama bear mediator and step in when you feel the need

You genuinely frighten these guys bc you have this innate ability to make them feel dumb as fuck

Namjoon:

No fights rlly but misunderstandings happen that makes Joon go manic

You get frustrated bc he does this instead of just talking to you, but he’s learning little by little

The moment you aren’t smiling or trying to make a light joke with him, fight over, you won, he is worried

Bc he knows if you’re not smiling, you’re almost definitely going to cry and when you cry, he cries

You actually implement Angel’s tips and see some improvement with communication as time goes on

Namjoon’s love language in making up is grand gestures, so he’ll rent out a whole restaurant, or take you on a shopping spree to an art supply store, anything that will bring a smile to your face

You intimidate the other guys when they fight with their darlings bc you keep a smile the whole time you are threatening them and holy fuck is it eerie. You usually try to distract the upset girls post-argument with a craft or fun art facts

Jimin:

What makes the relationship work are your selfish tendencies working in tandem with his more sinister ones, but it can’t always work that way

You both test each other all the time despite agreeing on almost everything because the relationship is not a fight for dominance, but control-control you usually win 

The closest you get to real fighting is rough sex, most of the time you have disagreements that you resolve with conversation

It's the most “healthy” (it’s not all that healthy tbh) thing about the relationship and it blows everyone's minds, but it only happens bc Jimin has always respected you, and he genuinely knows that you don’t need him as much as he needs you

But on the extremely rare occasion there is a fight it is never in front of anyone and all hell breaks loose: screaming, yelling, slamming doors, it all seems like endless hell bc you both are too stubborn to say when you’re wrong

Until you cry

He really can't stand the sight of you crying, bc you rarely ever cry. He sees you as really tough and his whole perception of the world shatters once he realizes he’s the cause of your tears

Making up includes, you guessed it, sex. Like calling into work bc you can’t walk sex (Jimin cries during this sex bc he feels undeserving but by round 2 he stops)

The girls come to you post-argument to rant bc you live to talk shit with them to vent

Taehyung:

Rarely ever fights with you, because he absolutely despises doing so and you typically do what he says without question

But when you do fight, it always ends with both of you crying and hugging

During the argument though, he can say some seriously out of pocket shit, bc he lacks impulse control and you take that shit to hear bc who wouldn’t 

The fights are nightmarish and hard to watch bc at some point it just becomes Taehyung losing his mind while you cower until he realizes how much of an asshole he’s being or until you try to leave mid convo

Bless him if he were to ever make you cry in front of the other MC’s, my guy would be ripped to shreds bc the other girls do not fuck around

Hates to ever be the cause of your tears so you both are very quick to makeup and he can spend up to weeks making up for it

I’m talking gifts, money, food, dates, clothes, he is basically your personal assistant that pays you when he feels bad

The girl’s come to you after an argument for quiet time or some cute embroidery time

Jungkook:

You don't fight often, but when you do it's disastrous bc he is wildly paranoid and you are wildly insecure

You almost always go into a panic attack, fearing he'll leave you and he immediately loses all fight in him and feels like shit

And he is absolutely crushed seeing you hyperventilate or clutch your chest while he's yelling so he just stops like mid yell will just close his mouth and take a deep breath before going to you 

Immediately apologizes when it happens

Usually cries with you while he holds you

Another fella that will get torn to shreds by the other girls if they even catch a whiff of him being anything other than sunshine and rainbows to you rip jungkook tbh

He makes it up to you the same way Taehyung makes it up, by shutting his mouth and doing whatever you want, and giving you whatever you want

When the other girls get into an argument with their guy, they come to you for a hug and some quality time distraction