#just fuck off and say you hate his character

[slapmeshigaraki]

౨ৎ "Are you scared, sweetheart?" ౨ৎ

♡ warnings: meanie!sylus x reader, spit, gunplay, daddy, condescension, improper evol use lmao, actually pretty tame ngl the dirty talk is kinda gross though, sylus is out of character in this in case that bothers you

♡ a/n: okay i lied and said i wasn't posting this until later in the week, but i finished editing it early so... idk happy valentine's day i guess. another old fic that i just edited. enjoy pretties !!

♡ Sylus doesn't ask you for much other than to leave him alone for a few hours on Sundays so he can clean his gun collection, but after a few interruptions too many, he decides that you can stick around just this once. Afterall, maybe you can help? ♡

“What is it?” he said after letting out a deep sigh, not bothering to look up at you through the lenses of his glasses. They sat loosely against the bridge of his nose as he looked down at his lap, softly polishing one of his most prized possessions: a gun. You weren’t sure whose death he’d pictured on the other end of it, but he treated it like the last bite of dessert, savoring it, keeping it hidden away for a special occasion. No one could touch it, look at it, breathe on it, except him. When Luke and Kieran gave you your first tour of the house, they wouldn’t even walk you down the hallway of the safe, scared that ‘Boss would smell your scents when he returned.’ It wasn’t until months later when he’d decided that your firearm wasn’t up to par any longer that he’d invited you in to 'shop' for a new one. That’s when you saw it, hung up on the wall in a glass case so high that only he could reach. It was wrapped in a fine silk fabric, a pristine black cherry gun whose make or model was so far beyond your pay grade that you’d never heard of it before.

Every Sunday he disappears into the safe for hours before dinner. He was not to be disturbed. It was the only thing that he was really particular about, but he needed it just to clear his head—some solace after a long week. So, the fact that you were interrupting him for the third time with a knock on the door was grating, to say the least.

“Nothing I just-“

“Is something on fire, darling?”

“No, Sylus.”

“Has someone managed to break into the house?”

“No.”

“Has Mephisto spontaneously combusted, leaving a feather lodged into one of your eyes?”

“No.”

“So, you can clearly see that I’m busy? Then I’ll ask again, what is it that you need?” His eyes still wouldn’t meet yours, eyebrows furrowing as he spoke, his tone strained.

“I just wanted to know if you wanted rice or mashed potatoes for dinner, but since you’re so caught up in tending to an inanimate object, I’ll decide for you.” He was snippier than usual, the darkening of his voice making it obvious he was not in the mood for witty banter.

“Be careful there, sweetheart. I’d hate for that pretty mouth to get you into trouble.”

“Or what? Will you get trigger happy and let that precious gun go off? No, of course not because we must keep it clean for a hypothetical threat that doesn’t fucking exist.”

“Kneel.” It wasn’t a question or a suggestion. It was a command, an order barked at an underling.

“Go fuck yourself,” You said, venom in your voice as you made a move back towards the door, hand clenched around the golden handle.

“If you make me get up to come catch you sweetheart, you’ll be sorry.” His eyes met yours for the first time, a fiery crimson illuminating your line of vision. His gaze was dark, challenging you to disobey him. When Sylus told someone to do something, they did it and you were no exception. You might bite back once in a while, but he always knew that you’d do what he told you to at the end of the day.

So, you kneeled, perhaps too slowly because it wasn’t before long that your knees were forced to buckle beneath you, Sylus making good use of his evol to bind your ankles together. The cool marble tile flooring chilled your flesh as your heartbeat ran wild, your mouth getting wetter with each second, practically drooling as if you were waiting to sink your teeth into your favorite meal. In the same breath, your hands were bound as well, moved behind your back against your will and stuck together like glue.

“Go on, crawl to me.” There was amusement staining his expression, a sinister smirk plastered across his face.

“What’s wrong, pretty girl? Can’t you get to me? A big strong girl like you with such a dirty mouth, surely you can move just a few feet on your own.” You relaxed your legs, letting your knees spread apart to rest them.

“I can’t…” You mumbled under your breath, unable to meet his glare any longer.

“Speak up, pet. You were so loud a few moments ago. Speak to me with that same tough voice now that you can't run away from me.” His slender fingers kept moving, cleaning the trophy with such grace. It was rhythmic, methodical, and calculated. It made you wet just to watch him, reminding you of how easily those same fingers could make you fall apart in his arms.

“I can’t move.”

“You can’t move?” he whined, pouting, mocking you without remorse.

“Well, I want you kneeling in front of me. So how do you suggest you get over here, sweetie?”

“Sylus…” You pled, which was slightly better than flat out begging.

“Tsk tsk, where are our manners?” The same red mist that bound your wrists and ankles now curled around your throat, not hesitating to squeeze abruptly, threatening to rob you of all of your air altogether.

“Please sir, help me.” Without letting another second pass, you were pulled into the air and inched over to him by the mist, roughly thrown back to the ground before him. His legs were spread in his seated position, gun resting on one, the other resting between your thighs.

“Thank you,” You said, hanging your head to avoid meeting his eyes.

“Aw, so polite. See what happens when you ask nicely? See how sweet I can be when you aren't a fucking brat?” With that, his foot adjusted, the tip of his perfectly polished leather shoe gently pressed against your core. You struggled not to writhe against him, desperately needing some form of friction to soothe the ache between your legs.

“Look at me, darling.” You did. The fervent desire in your eyes obvious, bottom lip bloody from biting it so hard, restraining yourself from any more unnecessary commentary.

“You look so needy like this, my foot pressed against your cunt, pouting underneath me. You look like you want to ask me for something? What is it, baby? Do you need something from your daddy, hm?” A whine fell from between your lips against your control as you tensed your legs, begging them not to move without permission.

“Please can I- can you fuck me please?”

“Can I fuck you? Do you think that I should dirty myself--” the hold on your neck tightened once more, “by fucking someone so pathetic that they’re getting off at the thought of grinding on my leg? Someone who can’t go a few hours without my attention shouldn’t get my cock inside of them. Someone like that shouldn’t get to feel my cum filling them up and spilling out of their tight little holes. They shouldn’t get to feel daddy’s tongue cleaning them up, kissing and sucking every inch on their pretty little pussy, should they?” You couldn’t get yourself to say no, but you knew yes wasn’t what he wanted to hear, so you stayed quiet. The cool sensation of metal burned your skin in an instant, tilting your jaw up, forcing your vision toward to ceiling, your eyes getting lost in the gold detailing of the mural above. Silence filled the space between you two, the only sound to be heard was the quickening of your heartbeat and the flip of the gun’s safety that was pressed against your flesh. A lump grew in your throat at the noise. You could feel the sole of his shoe pressing into you even more, gently moving back and forth as you bit your lip again.

“Let me hear you, baby. Tell daddy how good it feels, go on.”

“Th- Thank you daddy. That feels so good.”

“Say ‘thank you daddy for making my cunnie feel good.” You whined at the request, embarrassment causing tears to prick and sting at the corners of your eyes.

“You don’t want to use your words? How ungrateful.” It wasn’t long before the coolness against your jaw was gone. You dropped your gaze to look at him once again. The man before you was starved, his face void any sign of amusement. You wondered if this is what his prey felt when he looked at them, a lamb waiting to be eaten by the lion, forced to let him play with his food before he could be thoroughly satiated. He put the barrel of the gun against your lips now, his thumb languidly dancing on the trigger.

“Open up for me. Let me see that pretty tongue.” You hesitantly stuck your tongue out, the spit that had been building up in your mouth finally free to drip onto the metal as he pushed the barrel against the back of your throat. Your eyes widened at the sensation, the realization that his prized possession was being soiled by your drool far too humiliating. The tears flowed freely now. Your cheeks grew damp as you cried out against the obstruction in your mouth.

“Aw sweetheart, are you crying? Do you want to push your hips against me? Will that make your cunnie feel better?” You nodded, sniffling softly as you shifted uncomfortably, the realization that you couldn’t move at all finally catching up with you.

“Go ahead, hump my leg. You have permission. Make yourself feel good for daddy.” You tried to do as he asked, moving your hips slowly back and forth, the ache only growing in between your legs, but all you could think about was how dirty that gun was getting your mouth. Sobs fell from your lips now. His face contorted slightly at your cries.

“M-s-sorry daddy,” You struggled out, words muffled by the metal. He slowly pulled the gun out of your mouth,

“Are you scared, sweetheart? Is that why you’re dirtying this pretty face with tears, hm?” You felt his skin for the first time against yours, his free hand gently caressing your cheek, thumb making small circles on your flesh.

“No I just… I hate that I’m getting your gun dirty. I know how much you care about it. I’m sorry I just can’t stop drooling on it.” His fingers softly pressed under your eyes, catching the tears.

“Your spit is the sweetest thing I could use to clean this gun. It’s just an inanimate object, huh?" he said, being sure to use your choice of words exactly.

"Don’t cry pretty girl.” As he spoke, your wrists and ankles fell freely, the stress on your throat lifting as the red mist fell away.

“Come up here,” he said, fingers beckoning for you to stand and sit in his lap, your back pressed against his warm and muscular chest. Hooking his arm under your knee, he spread your legs apart, resting your ankle over the arm of the chair. His fingers wasted no time finding their way beneath your skirt, softly pulling the satin fabric of your panties to the side as he slipped a finger inside of you without warning.

“Oh my god,” You moaned out desperately as he hummed in amusement.

“I’m jealous. Your god is getting all of the praise, but I’m the one that's making this pussy leak all over my fingers. That doesn’t seem very fair now, does it?”

“Fuck, daddy thank you.” His pace quickened, every inch of his long and slender fingers making you gasp and writhe beneath his touch as you bucked against his palm.

“You are very welcome sweet girl. Next time you want daddy’s attention, you can just ask and we can skip all the theatrics, hm?”

“Yes, daddy.”

“Aw, ‘yes, daddy. Thank you, daddy.'” Such pretty words from such a dirty mouth. The same mouth that stained my gun, isn’t that right?” he said. You threw your head back, squeezing your eyes shut as his thumb rubbed small circles on your clit, your wetness forming a spot on the fine fabric of his pants as you felt his cock growing beneath you. It only made you squirm more at the thought of its thickness filling you up after being empty throughout this whole ordeal.

“Relax for me.” This was the only warning you got before you felt that same cool metal slide between your folds, the ridges of the firearm serving as a new source of friction to grind on before Sylus slid his finger out of your walls, replacing it with the tip of the gun against your entrance. He felt you tense up immediately in his grasp.

“No no no,” he said, thumb gently caressing your inner thigh, his touch burning you with ease.

“Relax baby. Let daddy’s pussy open up for him, hm? I just want that sweet little hole’s juices to cleanse my gun thoroughly.” Your mouth hung open, moans escaping as he spoke. Your head rested against his shoulder, hair messily rubbing against his shirt. He pressed his soft lips against your forehead.

“That’s it, puppy. Gooood fucking girl, you're taking it so well for me, huh sweetheart?” his fingers found your clit once more, melting away any tension. Slowly, the tip of the gun pushed its way between your tender walls, your flesh clenching around it tightly, making it hard for him to slide it in and out of you.

“That’s a greedy pussy, isn’t it— holding onto anything that it can, my fingers, my cock, my tongue, my gun. She just wants to be filled, hm? She just loves daddy so much that anything he puts inside, she doesn’t want to let go of?”

“Y-yes daddy, she loves you. Please please please keep touching her.” So, he did. Slowly but surely, he pushed the metal in and out, salivating as he watched the way your flesh gripped on to the tip before he’d shove it back inside.

“Fuck--you wanna cum for me? Gonna make a big mess all over daddy’s gun, sweetheart? How fucking filthy,” You nodded as Sylus’s rough hands gripped your jaw, forcing you to look up at him. Without warning, his spit filled your open mouth, slowly dripping from between your lips, coating your chest.

“Don’t swallow it. Keep my spit in your mouth when you cum for me. Stick your tongue out and cum all over me like a good little puppy,” He sped up even more now, the tip of the gun pushing against that spot inside of you that made your body heat up like white lightning that was trapped in a bottle and begging to be let out. He hit that spot over and over again, making your head fuzzy as he held your gaze captive with his scarlet eyes.

“Daddy—fuck—please, I don’t think I can take it.” You panicked, your hand desperately reaching for his wrist, hoping for some freedom from the incessant pleasure only for the mist to trap you once again, binding your hands up above your head and around Sylus’s neck, pressing your bodies even closer together.

“Shit—you’re so wet, you’re making a puddle in my lap. Are you gonna squirt around my gun, baby?” He said, emphasizing his point with a sharp push of the metal against you g-spot.

“No I- I can’t. It’s too embarrassing please don’t make me.”

“Come on, listen to your daddy and let go all over me. Squirt, cum, cry, I don’t care, but I’m gonna pull it all out of you either way. So, give it to me, it’s mine. I worked so hard for it,” he said, fingers finding their way into your open mouth, but you didn’t dare close your lips around them, just letting the spit drip down onto yourself and he bullied your pussy over and over again until you just couldn’t take it anymore. Tears streamed from your eyes once more as you let go. Your wetness spilled all over his lap, pulling guttural screams from your throat that were muffled by his hands.

“Good girl, that’s it. Come on, let go for daddy, baby. Poor baby, so pent up. It must feel so good to let go now, huh?” Streams of ‘yes’ and ‘thank you’ echoed through the room, bouncing off the walls as you squirmed against his grasp. He pressed his full lips to your face again as he pulled his finger and his firearm from your holes slowly. You watched him with tired eyes, as you were covered in your own wetness. The gun dripped with your juices, but he wasted no time putting the metal to his own mouth this time, flattening his tongue against the barrel of the gun and licking it clean.

“You are the sweetest thing I’ve ever tasted, sweetheart. Maybe you should let you help me clean my guns more often.” Dazed, and far too exhausted to protest, you closed your eyes, resting your head against him once again, your hands finally free. He pressed small kisses against your sweaty face, gently brushing any hair from your skin before you spoke up again.

“T-thank you, Sylus.”

“The pleasure is all mine, pretty girl.”

[elodieunderglass]

Hello Elodie! If you'd still like questions about Killie, can we hear about his relationship with O Holy Thunder? Does Killie avoid getting his fingers chomped off, and if so, how?

Toxic? Problematic? Worthy of cancellation. Violent? Don’t Normalise This. They’d eat each other if they could. (Thunder’s tried to.) Recognition of the self through the other?

Killie the jockey OC has a psychic horse connection preternatural power, like all good horsegirls. (It is a real thing and one of the genuine magics of the Earth.)

(Like: horses and boats, man, horses and boats. Humans are the Exploration Species, and those are our most ancient exploration methods. We build boats, but you have to make a wild grass-eating alien be your friend first.)

Those thousands-upon-thousands of years of close working relationships between humanity and our noble allies are reflected in a very dark mirror with Whatever The Fuck is Going On With Killie and Thunder.

They hate each other. Thunder weighs over ten times what Killie does, and his head is the size of Killie’s torso; but Killie is also the only way that Thunder gets to do his horse-job, and jumping over fences in a bid to psychologically destroy the competition is the only pleasure Thunder has in life.

Killie is the human here - technically - and that carries the burden of the ancient responsibility to be the goddamn adult, but the thing about Thunder is he’s the one who started it when you do the psychic-plugging-in-thing with him, he makes you a slightly worse person, and Killie’s already awful.

Normally jockeys don’t get very involved with handling mounts, and their fingers aren’t anywhere near racehorse mouths. Jockeys are the pilots - they’re literally referred to as ‘piloting’ the animals - and the ‘mechanics’ who do the ground stuff and maintenance are a separate class of grooms, valets, stable hands, stall managers, and other staff, depending on the size of the stable. The jockey is the other athlete in the equation, and they have a separate life about that - but in terms of horse handling, they’re just the lightweight bit of software you chuck on top just before throwing the horse out the gate.

But Killie’s retained on contract and Thunder makes a lot of money, and they share a particularly eccentric owner - so Killie has more than usual contact with Thunder. And Thunder, who really is very badly behaved, has gone for him. But Killie will be the first to defend him from finger-eating allegations. That’s nonsense. Horses don’t eat fingers. Killie still has them, look! It was just a bite. They weren’t fully severed, and Thunder didn’t swallow them, and it’s important to be accurate about this stuff, people should say what they mean.

And then they race. And then they are one thing, a union that is extraordinary.

(This is of course unacceptable and fictional, and Thunder should be gelded, or more realistically, minced. But oh shit, it’s characters who are “monstrous yet loveable” again.)

[queenjulia11]

The scene with Dorian’s mom. God. I love the way Matt plays parents of all kinds, but this was one of his best if you ask me. We learn so much about her just in her introduction.

This woman is a public-facing figure who very recently lost a child, and you can see it on her face right away when Matt plays her. That neutral expression of having to do a mundane task like making tea, because for some fucking reason the world keeps turning even when you’re in the worst pain imaginable. And then she sees her other son who ran away and has been missing for almost a year, and she is immediately overcome with relief and joy just to see him safe again. She doesn’t blame him or tell him she’s been worried sick. She’s just so happy to see him again.

And of course she says no when Dorian asks her if she hates him. Because he’s her baby, there’s no universe where she could ever hate him. But I really appreciate how she doesn’t go on a whole thing like “oh my gosh, sweetheart, of course not, it wasn’t your fault, etc.” Because even though all of that is definitely true, she knows it’s not what Dorian needs to hear right now. He won’t believe it.

She just says “no.” She just takes the weight off of his shoulders and gives him space to break in a safe, comfortable place.

And Dorian; sweet, noble, anxiety-ridden Dorian, who has been putting others before himself and pushing his emotions and grief all the way down because of more important work for so long, finally has the time to truly mourn his brother.

And his mother just holds him. No one else is here but the two of them. He gets to be her baby again for just a moment. She is so proud, and so sorry. She wishes she could’ve done more for him. But she is doing the one thing she knows she can do to help better than anyone else: and that is hold her son until he falls asleep in her arms, just like he did when he was small.

There’s nothing like a good, long cry when you’ve been needing one for a long time. It opens you up to so much. I really appreciate how Robbie shows that: how Dorian is crying through Orym’s whole speech to him, even if it’s a happy moment. It really shows how safe he feels with Orym now that he can just let it go. I love how Dorian says “yes” before Orym has even asked the question because he doesn’t feel guilty for wanting things anymore. I love how he asks if they can take it slow because it still hurts too much to be happy. I love how he kisses Orym, and how he lets Orym kiss him.

This character has grown so dramatically over the years, and it’s been a spectacular thing to witness. I’m so happy Dorian feels comfortable enough to live as himself now with the people he loves, and how he continues to exist in this beautiful world despite all the harshness he’s faced within it. I’m so happy he gets to heal, as messy and slow as it will inevitably be.

Fair winds, Dorian Storm. 💙

[fallloverfic]

"Dear Castlevania fandom... Just because a man is pretty doesn't mean he's a bottom." - an ignoramus

I already wrote about this before, but if you're too foolish to realize you don't know off-hand why people make whichever character a top or bottom, please shut up. There's a lot of reasons people like Olrox as a bottom, and why I in particular wrote him as a bottom back in 2023, which have nothing to do with how pretty he is (but can include that, and there's no harm in that):

The idea of a human topping a vampire is fun (this was before season 2 released and we relied on season 1 alone: hi new people who showed up in 2025, season 1 came out in September 2023, you didn't start the fandom or the ship :D Welcome, hope you enjoy your stay, but stop being dickheads :D). The idea that Olrox is so intrigued by Mizrak that he allows Mizrak more control in the form of topping is fascinating

Olrox topping Mizrak just isn't as interesting, at least in humanoid form (but in his serpent form, that's more interesting). This had nothing to do with who was prettier, at least in my case. I tested out who I enjoyed doing what, and Olrox bottoming was more fun. So I wrote that.

Are you implying Mizrak isn't pretty for some reason? I mean he's buffer (slightly) but... hmm... Honey, he had me at the side cape.

The idea of a shorter man topping taller man is fun (Olrox is actually taller than Mizrak)

The idea of Olrox, a marginalized First Nation man whose people were genocided by members of Mizrak's religion, letting Mizrak top him is, well... interesting. That Olrox wants to be in a relationship with Mizrak at all (deeper than "oh he's hot, we should fuck"), as indicated by him clinging to Mizrak in S1E4, is a fascinating one. Giving someone like that any power over you, voluntarily (after all, Olrox is stronger than Mizrak, he doesn't have to allow Mizrak any control) is deeply intriguing. The concept of marginalized people who love people who are active in making them marginalized is a complex idea and I like biting into it in fic as a marginalized person who unfortunately does that.

Said clinging in S1E4 feels kind of like something a bottom would do? Obviously you can frame it any way you want, there's no actual "this is bottom behavior" label or whatever on it. But it kind of feels that way and it's fun to angle it that way.

Olrox sitting on Mizrak in S1E3 while clothed is so fun for him riding Mizrak headcanons. I'm sorry you're boring but I'm not.

If people want buff cute guy to top the slightly less buff pretty vampire, let them

You can still draw whatever conclusions you want from the final episode of season 2, but it very much feels like Mizrak is topping at least at some point in their relationship by now, and if people want to go with that, I say let them

The idea of a weaker/newer vampire topping a more powerful/older vampire is fun

Younger top/older bottom is popular

The potential idea that Mizrak is more powerful than Olrox expected + is topping him is fun

Switching is a thing

Certain dynamics are popular in fandom and people roll with them

Olrox topping has been popular in fandom since 2023. I know, I wrote it twice in 2023: Mizrox with Olrox topping, Olrox/Richter with Olrox topping. It's not radical to write, it's just what people enjoy doing for whatever reason. I didn't look at Olrox and Richter and score them on pretty points to see who got to top/bottom. I just didn't see them in that scenario with Richter topping. I imagined it, though. Just didn't get around to writing it as a fic.

I'm curious how precisely you make this stupid concept work with Adrian, who is also pretty lol Are Adrian and Olrox not allowed to fuck in any way where one is a bottom because they're both pretty lol (I made Olrox a bottom in that relationship, hate me if you must :3)

More to the point, people can do whatever they want. It's shipping. Play with your dolls how you want and let other people play with theirs how they wish. Block if it annoys you.

[charmwasjess]

for our good friend dooku, 16, 21&22, and 6 if you have more to say about it. 🙏🙇‍♂️

OH YOU JUST COME INTO MY ASK BOX AND MAKE MY DAY?!! :D Beloved anon, these are SUCH fun questions and I absolutely had a blast answering them. Thank you so much! Stop by anytime and I’ll make you a cup of coffee! (I have tea too, but my taste in tea is real gross.)

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

Ohh, this is a hard one! 

The thing is, while I have my favorites, I find Dooku soo very shippable with a vast number of characters - not because he has any healthy understanding of his own sexual and emotional needs anymore than he has a healthy relationship with food - but because especially in his Sith era, he’s a black hole of need and loneliness. Sex is like the one way Sith are allowed to access the intimacy that fifty years of Jedi communal life has trained him to want and need. 

The ship for him that I absolutely love-hate in that vein is Sidious/Dooku. I doubt it went much further than a few absolutely debased encounters because let’s be honest, Sidious can do much better and isn’t in the habit of letting his dog eat from his plate, but whoof, what a fun, fucked up ship with nasty power dynamics. “Oh nooo, oh no, awful….where’s the link?” energy.

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

I love giving Dooku big, often violent, over the top moments where his natural appetite for chaos comes out. 

Dooku gives you these amazing options as a fanfic writer. He’s so high drama. A huge part of his reserve and composure is that there’s an absolute volcano of feeling bubbling under the crust.

The things he says are absurd and beautiful, poetic and horrific, hilarious and awkward. You can push the character further than you expect, and he’ll go with you in surprising places in a piece of writing if you let him show off. This is a character who loves attention and has the natural talent and chaos to back up his own bullshit. If you can get his sound and feel right, there’s almost nothing you can’t do with him - because a core part of Dooku is the unreliable narrator: even he doesn’t always know what he’s about to do. 

I think the hardest part is his “voice” because Christopher Lee had such a distinctive cadence - it’s not just a British accent, it’s early 20th century British, who grew up bilingual and went on to speak like literally 7 different languages fluently, with a supremely deep voice, who wanted to sing opera but only got half-trained before WWII ruined that dream for him. It’s a very unique sound.

I like “my” Dooku voice in my fics and I’m proud of it; I work really hard on it and it’s why I use him as a POV character most often. But I still look at my own fics and have those record needle scratch moments where I know a line of his needs to get reworked. It’s a constant process.

The Christopher Lee accent also could not be MORE different than my own rural American one. There’s a hilarious-awful story in Lee’s autobiography, Lord of Misrule, about him getting stopped by a patrol of Americans in WWII who absolutely do not believe he’s English and they start trying to speak German to him. He goes, “you don’t have to speak German, you know, I’m fairly capable of understanding English, since that’s what I am.” 

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to this character? Something you don't like?

I love it when fics do a realistic job of letting Dooku be the walking contradiction he is. Two of my favorite Dooku fics right now are Pray My Mind Be Good to Me and Galaxies Far Far Away May Be Closer Than They Appear - both feature Dooku written in this way. He has done or is going to do horrific shit - shit that cannot be changed and has real consequences. In both fics, he’s also portrayed vividly, a "real person," full of genuine emotion, vulnerability, and deep investment in the other characters. Love is a part of his betrayal and betrayal is a part of his love. These two things exist in the character simultaneously in queasy, gorgeous combination. 

As far as what I don’t like, I don’t know, I think Dooku is a tremendously intimidating character to write and I’m impressed by anyone who takes a crack at writing him! I’d encourage anyone to give it a shot. 

I have one really small weird pet peeve, and that’s giving him too much stuffy, uptight rich guy cliche. Dude was a mud-grubbing mission Jedi for 50 years, himself raised by a swamp troll, who went on to train two of the most chaotic Jedi. He’s eaten more bugs than Anakin, and I'll die on that hill.

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

I went pretty broad on my other answer, so I’ll tell you two lil' things!

I’m tall (ironically I’m about Sifo-Dyas’s canon height, a character whose legit tallness is often overlooked cause he’s standing next to Dooku–) and I pull a ton of my own experiences into how I write the way he moves or his little gestures, especially how small he can fold up when he’s feeling vulnerable. There’s a unique tall person awkwardness that comes from experiencing the adolescent growth spurt right at the time when it’s the most emotionally unbearable to be physically conspicuous. 

I didn’t realize I shared his exercise-away-the-strong-emotion thing until I was chatting with @bolithesenate about some fic or something, and said something offhand like “too upset about Sifo-Dyas, gotta go for a run” and she was like “uh, Jess? are you QUOTING your own Dooku characterization here?” :O Don't call me out like that, bro!! Do not perceive me!

[shocked-collar]

tips for writing Lawrence? I really admire your writing.

IUKJ,MSEDNGBLKJGLESJLSDERG FIRSTLY THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU I'M LITERALLY SO STRUCK??? MY WRITING???? ADMIRABLE???? I FEEL LIKE MY TEETH ARE GONNA FALL OUT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

*fixes suit and tie* anyway

reminder that i am not gato and these are all my interpretations. the best part about fandom communities is that each mind thinks so alike yet independently, and the way you write a character won't be exactly the way another person does and that's your own personal magic touch.

Just like Ren, Lawrence has certain rules I like to stay attached to. The problem with HIM though is he's such a wild card it's hard to know when these rules apply.

Rule one is to remember Lawrence is isolated. He's used to being on his own and doing things on his own so he doesn't expect or even reach out for help. The idea of another human being kind or helpful for no reason is foreign, if not unrealistic to him.

Rule two is to remember that Lawrence has a very, very specific routine he lives by every week, rarely with interruptions. He's a homebody. He likes things his way and can't have them any other way. It's irritating and gives him a very strange sense of urgency when they're not. This is dangerous because that urgency can very quickly become aggression, as can a lot of things.

Rule three is to remember Lawrence is human. He's pretentious as fuck and speaks so poetically of death, wants to die so very badly, has done incredibly terrible things to people in the name of art, mentally separates himself from the public, believes he's better off locked up somewhere, yet reacts as any other person does to very many things. He says he wants to die, yet cries when his life is threatened or he's scared. He's certain he hates people and people hate him, yet yearns for the company of others who understand him and partakes in communities, even if just online. He says he's better off inside, yet left his house to meet a friend 2 weeks into talking online. He's a 'terrible person,' yet only takes MC home because he didn't want to leave them out there all alone. He's more human than he realizes.

Rule four is to remember he's proficient in gaslighting. Lawrence doesn't think the way other people do! Everything and anything can have meaning, and it's usually what he wants to see. He can make up anything on the fly if it protects him from guilt, fault, sorrow, anxiety, whatever it is he needs to be shielded from. He's quite the brat, so challenging him on any of his interpretations makes him irrationally bothered and he may not even speak to you anymore afterwards. He also uses this mental-protection to keep his world view in order, like in the situation in BTD2 when Ren leaves and he takes it out on you. It was REN who insisted you hangout a while, it was REN who left on a whim- but to Lawrence, you being there at all was the problem and it's all your fault.

Rule five is to keep the image of creepy in mind! Lawrence embodies the type of person you wouldn't want to be caught alone in an elevator with. He just radiates 'bad person' vibes, and his smell and quietness of his voice doesn't help.

And finally, rule six is to remember that Lawrence is a wild card. How he behaves depends on pretty much every single individual circumstance in whatever situation he's in. If he's uncomfortable he could be irritable, if the room has more than 2 other people in it he could be feeling intimidated, if he's meeting with a friend online he could be hesitant and scared, if something scary happens big or small it could launch him into a panic, anxiety, or aggressive attack, if someone's talking and their mouth sounds too wet it could make him hurt himself, if he's bored but nothing seems entertaining enough it could force him to dissociate, he could like this taste or feeling one day and absolutely hate it the next, his opinions on specific people change like the static on TV...

I like to think of Lawrence like an alligator, as they're opportunistic feeders and usually don't attack without provocation. Problem is with Law, you don't really know how you provoked him half the time. He's such an interesting, confusing character that I'm not even sure how to write it down in a way that makes sense. It all really depends on how YOU want to write him.

AGAIN, I'm not sure I helped??? this one is. a lot worse than rens imo. BUT I DID MY BEST AND AGAIN THANK U SM FOR LIKING MY WRITING HEEHEEHEHUEHENRKJDFGNDFLKJGGF

[usernameforaboredcat]

Things I DID Like About The One Piece Live Action

So, I’ve been getting a lot of hate for my most recent post about how I PERSONALLY didn’t like how they writ Sanji, and a lot of people are saying I hated it when I never said that like once.

SO since I “hate” it so much why don’t I tell y’all stuff I DO like so hopefully I stop getting yelled at and called a hater when I’m really not.

Let’s get started!

Inaki Godoy as Monkey D. Luffy

In only the nicest way possible, Inaki as Luffy has the same cutie patootie wide eyed idiot vibes as the original Luffy himself. “Idiot” being in quotation because he’s just goofy, Luffy is definitely one of the most emotionally intelligent characters in One Piece.

I love his wide eyed “IM SO EXCITED TO BE HERE” mentality until shit hits the fan and he gets serious when it comes to those close to him/his friends.

There isn’t a lot to say other than I did enjoy his performance as Luffy, and I’m excited to see more from him as an actor.

On that note as well check out The Imperfects, I liked that and it has out cutie Inaki.

Mackenyu as Roronoa Zoro

A complaint I personally see is “he’s too serious”… have they SEEN the first couple of episodes or chapters of one piece? Yes, Zoro is goofy later on but he’s also serious, more importantly he’s serious in the beginning. Zoro was always serious, but he’s goofy depending who he’s with.

He’s not serious, per say, he’s closed off, much like another character I’ll talk about later. In the live action they removed Zoros two bounty hunter friends to assumably make Zoro more of a lone wolf and I like that, it show how much Kuinas death really effected him and his will to open up to people and make friends. Until he meets Luffy.

Zoro slowly opens up, it takes time to open up to people after loosing a friend and wanting to make more friends at risk of them dying as well. Especially his drinking scene with Nami at the Baratie, this goes for the both of them, but they’re both willing to opened up to another person and grow closer as friends, and I LOVED THAT!!

I hope Zoro does the foot clap in Drum Island.

Speaking of…

Emily Rudd as Nami

Loved, adored, I LOVE WOMEN!!!

Look I’m not biased because I’m an aggressive bisexual, I just like her a lot as Nami. Something little I love that they added for Nami is how nervous and on edge she is basically all the time, scared to fuck up or get caught because the dread of Arlong is always lingering over her.

The moments she does open up are few, but you can tell that the bricks to her thick built walls are slowly crumbling, like the dressing room scene in Kayas mansion, her scene with Kaya in her bedroom I think was an amazing add, the previously mentioned drinking scene at the Baratie with Zoro.

I can’t wait to see more from her.

Taz Skylar as Sanji Vinsmoke

Alright alright alright alright now I know what some of y’all are thinking, but PLEASE PLEASE HEAR ME OUT IM BEGGING 😭

I said the aspects I didn’t like, but I’m being positive and saying what I DO like about Sanji, so stop bullying me please.

I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I was instantly rizzed up, bite a chunk out of that WholeCake he’s packing, okay I’ll stop. But he’s still dashing, charming, and I do like his chemistry with Luffy in relating on “my father figure lost a limb for me” that was cute.

His love of cooking is there, his strength is there, and I like the little colder Sanji because his past still lingers with him and he’s being denied his true passion in life which is cooking.

And I wanna give a special shout out to Taz himself, getting a degree in cooking and training in kick boxing for his role as Sanji, true dedication to the role.

Are we all cleared up now? Has my hate train arrived at its station? Yes? Please?

Jacob Romero as Usopp

He’s a massive pussy and a charmer and I love it!

I’ve heard some people say the live action “fixed” Usopp because he’s less annoying, which…bro. He’s not annoying, he’s scared, I think ANY sane person would be scared doing half the shit they have to go through, I know I would be.

I wouldn’t say they fixed him, just saying he’s more composed. He’s a liar, he’s an actor essentially, and he plays that well.

Speaking of Usopp…

Usopp (Jacob Romero) & Kaya (Celeste Loots)

*inhail*…AAAAHHHHH!!!!!

I love them, adore, so cute, love and kisses and rainbows and glitter and roses and unicorns all around!

We all know that the fandom has shipped one woman with Usopp since day one and it was Kaya, their chemistry was there and with Usopp leaving to adventure with Luffy it seemingly held off and blue balled their relationship until later in the story.

Oda doesn’t write romance, but when he does it always goes hard!

Am I saying Usopp and Kaya are officially boyfriend and girlfriend? No, course not. But do I think it’s more motivation for Usopp to come back and survive to see the woman who loves him.

So sweet.

Morgan Davies as Koby (Coby?)

First of all, love the Aussie in the cast, me too the fuck! Plus, personally it was great to see him again in a franchise I love, the first movie I saw him in being in Evil Dead.

Anyway, if I had to admit, probably my personally favourite when it comes to manga, to anime, to live action. How nervous and skittish he is at the beginning, to becoming more confident in himself and his role as a marine are so well done, especially him already so early literally growing into his uniform, a sign of his growth later in the series.

I also love the little nod from Garp, since Koby used to work on a pirate ship he already knows how to man and take care of a ship, which gives him a level above other rookie marines.

They’ll probably push Garps group to the side in season two to focus more on Smoker and Tashigi, but I do hope to see Morgan again in season two.

Steven Ward as Mihawk

When I say perfect, I mean perfect. Chefs kiss even. As iconic as his intro in the anime and manga is, I don’t think it shows the true power of the title Warlord probably, I don’t think we see that till Crocodile, but even he got his ass beat by a 17 year old. Warlords are powerful and feared, and Mihawks introduced does that perfectly.

How carelessly and effortlessly he destroys an entire ship and it’s men and captain with ease, all because they woke him up from his nap. He may be called MiHAWK but he’s always been more like a cat to me personally. Plus, now that we’ve seen the power of a warlord, it’ll really hype up Crocodile for Season 2/3, especially for those who are live action only.

Side note, Steven was at the last con I was at, so sweet and lovely, please adopt me. I got him to sign my Crossguild poster it was epic, can’t wait to add Joe (Crocodile) and Jeff (Buggy)

Speaking of Buggy…

Jeff Ward as Buggy

The Buggy cult is real, some of y’all may remember the little Buggy in the bottom corner of Tumblr to promote the live action.

What I love most is how they terrifying they made Buggy. Less we forget this is the same man who fired a canon in a dudes face because he thought he said something about his nose in the manga. There’s also the clown phobia and the real life clown attacks back in I think 2016.

Buggy is both terrifying and hilarious and they pull that 50/50 amazingly. I love goofy Buggy, but I hope they keep how ruthless he is.

Also lemme suck that nose, ANYWAY!!!

Peter Gadiot as Shanks

(I reached my image/gif limit by the time I got to Shanks…ALSO THERES A LIMIT?!)

I don’t have a lot to say because he’s not on screen much, but I think that’s okay because Shanks appears like every ten years in real life in the anime like some cryptic.

But, he still kept that warm Shanks charm that he has that we all know and love from Shanks. And as Emily said herself, “Shanks is daddy” and I can’t agree more queen.

Shout Outs

These are for characters/performances that didn’t leave much of an impact on me personally but I still liked them.

Vincent Regan as Garp

Aiden Scott as Helmeppo

Ilia Isorelys Paulino as Alvida

Kathleen Stephens as Makino

McKinley Belcher as Arlong

Celeste Loots as Kaya

Alexander Maniatis as Captain Kuro

Craig Fairbrass as Zeff

Again, I really hope all this clears up my feelings for the live action, I never said I hated, not once, cause I never did.

It’s just like one piece itself, we all have bits and pieces we don’t like, from arcs to characters to designs to anything.

I like Skypia when many don’t, same with Thriller Bark. My friends don’t like Skypia or Thriller Bark. My friend likes Long Ring where I don’t.

We all have our own thoughts and opinions regarding one piece especially with it being such a huge series with so much.

I love one piece, and I’m not going to stop loving such a masterpiece.

[thetravelingegg]

I’m a horrible horse nerd and also a horrible transformers nerd so enjoy my headcannons of my favorite mtmte characters as horses! 😋

First up Rung the Connemara pony!

Really, really old especially for a horse but has the soundness of a 10 year old. It’s a running joke between the farm hands that he’s actually an immortal god and will outlive everyone like he did his previous owner

No one ever rides him but he loves having a job to do and would make the best lesson pony for little kids or therapeutic riders

The most amazing horse to go on a trail ride with

Mostly forgotten about in favor of the other, larger, more exhilarating and athletic horses, but is extremely affectionate and social

The best thing to do after a bad day is to hide in the corner of his stall while he gently nibbles at your hair or puts his head in your lap

Someone should braid his mane and put little flowers in it <3

Would make a great therapy horse. 10/10 sweetest boy who deserves all the peppermints

Next up Megatron the draft horse!(no particular breed however I’m pretty sure the one in the picture is a Belgian draught)

The horse is a war criminal

Usually pretty well behaved but is highly intelligent and is constantly outsmarting his handlers

It’s a running joke between them that one day he’ll start a revolution and take over the world

Has phenomenally smooth gaits and would be a good horse for a rider learning how to trot, canter or jump

Pretty patient with inexperienced riders but will not take shit and will absolutely tell you if you’re yanking on his bit or kicking too hard

Actually not that old but years of neglect has caused his joints and back to be in rough condition so he can’t do anything too strenuous

Would push himself between the fragile farm hands and other horses if they get too rowdy for his comfort

Is much gentler when disciplining the humans than he is disciplining the other horses

Yes you read that right he will discipline the humans. He likes to keep everyone in line and won’t hesitate to correct unnecessary aggressiveness whether human or horse

Basically the “alpha wolf” of the farm, will make sure everyone is cared for

Thoroughbred Whirl!

Bites. Bites. Bites. Bites

I only say thoroughbred because I’ve worked with them before and a lot them acted like Whirl(to be fair they also weren’t trained but I digress)

Was in one race where he bucked off his jockey immediately after the gates opened and ran around the track spooking the other horses.

They tried to fix his behavioral issues by gelding him but it turns out he’s just like that

Is missing an eye and some teeth(idk what else to do for his claws since horses can’t live without all of they’re hooves

Trying to ride him is literally the worst

If he doesn’t buck you off, he has a really jittery trot that is impossible to sit and a canter that feels like your getting launched into orbit(impossible to half-seat).

Hates all tack but has absolutely crotch-killing sky high withers if you try bareback

Amazing jumper though. Can scale practically anything with perfect form. Would be fun to do cross country with if he actually listened

(A picture of a cross country jump because holy fucking shit that’s insane)

Jumping with him feels like flying

Is constantly jumping the fences to raid the feed room no matter how big they are and confusing everyone who works there.

I honestly can’t see him ever behaving enough to be ridden calmly for more than five minutes(if he really likes and trusts the rider)

Will leave the farm randomly to go on a romp through the woods then come back for dinner

The apex predator of his area. Will fight off bears and eat small wildlife like squirrels because he can

Last but not least it’s friesian Tarn!

Infinite ♾️ aura horse

The most graceful thing on four legs. Gorgeous and intimidating

Absolutely demolishes dressage competitions. Completely captivates the judge with his flashy movement and his scar only makes him more charming

As soon as he steps into the ring his competitors know they lost

The kind of horse who loves training and his job

The only one who’s still a stallion and is actually well behaved for the most part although he’ll throw the occasional tantrum when things don’t go his way

He sometimes even goes overboard in an attempt to please his rider

His best friend is a feral barn cat named Nickel who hates humans and will attack anyone who tries to pet her

She terrifies the farmhands more than the actual stallion and they will fight over who has to enter Tarn’s stall first because she likes to sleep in the straw

She will nap on his back while he grazes

Here’s a video of what he would look like

[shoups32]

Dude I hate the whole trope of red hood/Jason going back to batman after learning how sad batman is without him

Like it makes no fucking sense for his character

I have the belief that Jason knew batman was hurt when he died and he knew batman cared for him but it is the fact that he doesn't care *enough*. He didn't care enough to stop the one person who killed Jason and really hurt so many of the other robins all because he didn't want the joker to "win" even though letting him live and antagonize the robins and affect your life forever is letting him win.

I understand his whole no killing rule but there is a point where he needs to break it or at least let someone else kill Joker. The joker has actually ruined almost every single one of the robins lives in one way or another.

Also back on the Jason would forgive batman thing, it makes even less sense because in most media Jason hates the fact that Jason made more robins after him. Almost every robin was seen as a replacement of him. Tim was basically a copy paste of Jason and in some comics that is why Batman liked him so much. With Steph she was basically a sit in to make Tim upset until she was no longer needed and basically fired for the smallest fucking reason. With Damian Batman just pisses me off entirely (this part is based off the comics and not the movie because the animated movies because those were just super stereotypical and most stuff from those have been retconned for what I know). Damian is seen as a younger version of batman, which makes sense, the kid is his son but holy fuck does batman annoy me in this. I know Damian being a robin was more of a dick's thing than batman's thing but batman is still his dad. Batman was more than capable of stopping him from being a robin and trying to get him actual help. Actually Batman was capable of doing that with all the robins.

I know the robins chose to be robins but he was more than capable of just saying no and getting them (AND HIMSELF) proper therapy. Using the excuse of "Oh batman is also neurodivergent and has a lot of issues!" is so fucking stupid. I get he has his issues but you would think he would learn from his mistakes and even possibly get therapy after the second robin. He even could have still had them do robin work and get better but he didn't. He used them as child soldiers then got rid of them when they were no longer needed.

All this being said, as much as I hate batman he is very well written (well has the potential to be) but I wish people stopped seeing him letting the robins fight as an act of good and acting like batman can't be blamed for what happened to the robins.

[sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes]

Virgil: ...is this what cam girls feel like?

Remus: I feel like cam girls do a liiiitle more then we did

Virgil: well at least they get paid, we had to flirt with that weirdo for free!

Remus: No, we lost a bet, that's not free, it's just hoeing for a bono

Virgil: why would you even put up flirting with Wrath in the first place?

Remus: oh, so you thought he could steal that hotdog roller?

Virgil: NO- IT'S JUST- ugh, that whole video we recorded yesterday- "oh Wrath your villain introduction was so cool-" ew!

Remus: that wasn't even the worst part, the everyone had to watch us do that!

Virgil: plus he probably won't leave me alone for like a month now, he's gonna go home to his video games and make create-a-characters of us.

Remus: yeah he'll kill us in Grand Theft Auto

Virgil: you can make characters in Grand Theft Auto?

Remus: do I look like a bitch who would know?

Virgil: whatever, God I need a Xanax- wait where'd I put i- BITCH THAT WAS MY LAST XAN, HOW'D YOU TAKE THAT?!

Remus: quick hands. Man tiddy and Xanax, what a combo!

Virgil: goes together like peanut butter and Percocet...

Remus: "this is true"

Virgil: oh yeah, he kept doing that! "This is true"

Remus: like he's too good to say "yeah" he has to be a scientist about it

Virgil: heh- and- and what about "ummm okaaay?"

Remus: I HATE it when they do that! Like they have to sound like the gay comic relief cat in every Disney movie

Virgil: "this is true"

Remus: "this is true!"

Virgil: "yes in fact!"

Remus: "quite in interesting outfit!"

Virgil: "stop screaming we're having sex!"

Janus: what are you doing?

V + R: UH-

Janus: sounds like you had a run-in with Wrath

Virgil: what the fuck do you wa- oh he has McDonald's- Janus where'd you get McDonald's?!

Janus: ...McDonald's?

Virgil: bitch gimme a fry!

Janus: IS THAT HOW YOU ASK?!

Virgil: BITCH PLEASE GIVE ME A FRY!

Remus: and yeah we saw Wrath

Janus: me too, I could tell. He was drawing pictures of you guys when I saw him!

Virgil, mouth full: no way

Remus: what were we doing in the pictures?

Janus: like... Being cute, making kissy faces with hearts around it...

Virgil: Remus, we're gonna get murdered! We're gonna get murdered by a guy who can't even tie his fucking shoes!

Remus: well at least he can't torture us, can't tie a rope either

Janus: yeah, but I ripped them up and threw them in the trash, told that hoe to watch it.

Remus: you're the best, Janus

Janus: I know. Okay, I'm gonna go flirt with Patton, see you guys later

Remus: ...he's like the honest bitch ever

Virgil: eugh, I guess... ...

Virgil: ... ...What's gayer, dating a guy or wanting your sworn enemy to have sex with your dead body?

Remus: hmmm... Dating a guy? The second's kinda like using a fleshlight I guess

Virgil: okay... Still could be gayer...

Remus: what were we talking about... Oh yeah, so what are we doing for this next Sanders Asides?

Virgil: it's the movie casting thing right?

Remus: yeah- yeah, so I was thinking-

*BANG*

Virgil: WH-

Remus: I think the AC exploded again

Virgil: god that scared me- okay, sorry, continue

Remus: the challenge should be a cast of bald guys who DON'T look like they say the n-word

Virgil: how is that a challenge?

Remus: name one.

Virgil: Vin Diese- no, wait... Bruce Willi- wow, this is challenging!

*BANG* *BANG*

Virgil: damn, that's alot of AC units...

*buzz*

Virgil: oh wait, that's my phone... Huh, I just got a voice message from Logan.

Logan: hello Virgil, I'm just calling to inform you that the mindscape's on emergency lockdown. Please follow procedures at this time.

Remus: what the fuck was that about?

*BANG* *BANG* *SCREAMING*

Remus: is that...

Virgil, standing up, voice doubling: Wrath's snapped, we gotta get out of here!

Remus: huh...

Virgil: what are you doing?! Let's go!

Remus: we flirted with him yesterday, we're the last people he'd kill, just chill out.

Virgil: THAT'S EASY FOR YOU TO SAY, YOU TOOK MY LAST XANAX! *runs off*

Remus:

*BANG*

Remus:

*BANG*

Virgil: *slowly sits back down*

Remus: I thought you were running for it?

Virgil: security locked the doors...

*BANG*

Virgil: oh my God-

Remus: damn that was a big one!

Wrath in the distance: "TOOK TOO LONG TO APPEAR" YOU SAY?! WERE THE BACKGROUND HINTS AND GLOWING EYES NOT ENOUGH?! WHO ELSE WANTS SOME, HUH?! HUH?!

Virgil: ...is this how the series ends?

[marzipanilla]

I think I just desperately miss shows with 20+ eps a season.

Even with him fumbling it I would love Mark actually attempting to be a bastion of morals/attempting the right thing. I think they're almost trying to do that this season with his confrontation with Cecil, but it all falls so flat because Mark struggles to even articulate why he thinks he's right to begin with except by defining himself as not his father. Once more we missed out on him attempting to find a role model people consider good and doing what he could in his power to emulate and either learning something about what being a beacon for ppl means or realizing that everyone fucks up and purity culture in a trauma response job ain't gunna get you no where. He's so obsessed with power level he doesn't realize he needs to actually learn things. Like why it's important to help people at all. He doesn't know apparently, since he can't explain to Oliver that being a hero is more than killing people who were hurting others. hint Mark- it's because the unilateral power Cecil fears you capable of wielding is the same shit he wields

We need flashbacks to Nolan's time w the Guardian bc what was that like before he had the slightly awkward shit we see in S1 ep 1. Immortal mostly trusts him during the white house attack and is genuinely horrified at the thought of him hurting the team ! Unlike in the comic where he just says 'I've always hated you' which like I could take either canon- tho it really feels more like a dick measuring contest gone wrong instead of 'I knew you were bad I just couldn't put my finger on it' in the comic.

Team dynamics my beloved. Wonder Woman was under some rubble and Batman was desperately digging her out and they made him stop and when she emerged a moment later she noticed the dirt on his hands !! and comforted him even tho he tried to hide the fact he was scrambling to get her out ! no words just actions ! like ! give me tiny character moments -sob- The JL getting coffee and blankets for each other when sleepy D : (and more a character moment than a team moment but Clark crawling into the rocket he came to Earth on to hide bc his dream monster form was hurting people and he just wanted to be safe !!! all visual never discussed w dialogue !! beautiful!!) Also Lisa Edelstein showed up as a voice for a side char and I spent the whole ep going who ??? until I saw the credits lol

Oh that's a fun scene! I've maybe only ever seen the first Madagascar film lol But yeah, even changing the tone- please let the team play off of each other! We get .5 seconds of that in S1 during the end of the Machine Head fight. a tiny. tiny moment. Definitely limitations and budget for animation, but gah- like !! the whole squad going up for the sequid invasion threat and literally two people doing anything at all !! like !! WHY DID ALL OF YOU GO YOU LITERALLY DID NOTHING. Blame yourselves for what happened on the ground team, like, damn, the whole team did not need to go into space. You'd think you would have figured that out by now.

Everyone gets female characters jewelry in media and I hate it lol Look, there are times it can work- heirlooms, genuinely discussed mcguffin/backstory pieces where whatever it is means something, but the vast majority of the time it's just a shiny necklace picked up from the fucking mall. And what do the women get their men? Insanely thoughtful gifts about their personalities and interests. If you can only think to get your partner jewelry, then you fucking know nothing about them at all. My biggest example of this is from the show Castle, where one episode has the main chick setting up a recreation of Rear Window for the main dude to experience/play out like it's real bc he's stuck at home on his birthday. The entire episode is about what goes down. When it's her birthday? He buys her a necklace, and it's a subplot to whatever it going on in the ep, and it's a comedic subplot bc he loses it at one point and most of the antics around the gift aren't even about her. And then he gives her the necklace at the end that we're never going to see her wear again because she has a job where wearing shit like that isn't a good idea.

I fucking hate jewelry as a gift. It says I don't know anything about this character and I refuse to put any effort in.

Also is Kate gunna where her fucking wedding ring on missions??? like ??? what ??? Then again, I think Nolan, Mark and Eve are legit the only heroes in the entire series who have secret identities/civilian identities, so like- I guess it doesn't matter?? 90% of you have your fucking name as part of your hero name if you have a name at all. A part of me is glad the show never really deep dives into those stories, they sort of did with Amber in S1, and they bring it up a bit with Debbie telling Paul this season, but like, at the end of the day, this is a world where secret identities are 1000% just... not a thing. Everyone calls Mark, Mark. Like. EVERYONE. To the point that it didn't even occur to him that A SPACE ALIEN knowing his first name might have been a red flag in S2 when he went to Thraxa.

Mark is only strong in the 11th hour and I would hope someone is genre savvy enough to realize that by now. Do not call on Invincible unless everyone is already dead, he is worthless otherwise lol

The rogue's gallery is kind of sad for this show. Like. There is no personal element to any of the reoccurring villains (there's like.. one coming up that's personal and then there's Levi), and if you want them to be menacing and reoccurring they either really need to rep something socially bad and you're commenting on it each time they make their appearance and its about THAT and the teams response to it, or you need a personal connection with the villain. Doc Seismic just makes broad strokes first semester of college level commentary about the current state of society! Tho, I will say, I think his token diversity comment is literally the first time Mark has been acknowledged as not white? Which like, I get not bringing it up all the fucking time especially since it is a change from the comics, but, it IS a change from the comics and in either medium he is a mixed race kid! We ever going to give him a chance to talk about that? You know, the thing he and Oliver SHOULD ACTUALLY BE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT THAT'S PERSONAL TO THEM AND HUMANIZING AND NOT ABOUT HAVING COME OUT OF NOLAN'S DICK? Where is the moment where Oliver is slathering on make-up to go outside and lamenting on not being human passing the way Mark is? Where does Mark get to acknowledge being alien?

Cecil did go to Debbie in an attempt to get a hand in Oliver's training and it IS wild to think about what that would have entailed. 'Cause like, I think he woulda seen that kid go 'and then I kill them now, right??' and had to go : / pretty damn quick about it lol Also him constantly antagonizing Mark after everything is hilarious. Like. Are you trying to prove to everyone watching that Mark is also being unhinged or are you Just Like That Cecil. Like, when Cecil called off the reanimen but they kept beating on Mark- was that just him putting in a false call to make it sound like he was calling them off and then Mark went cray cray on them anyway, or did he genuinely try and call them off and it didn't work for some reason? Bc him trying to get other heroes on his side by showing off how powerful/dangerous Mark could be is kinda funny.

Some blank space is fun to work with in fic, but too much blank space and it feels like you're floating in the ether going ?? this ?? make sense maybe ?? but then what do you push off of? Just make up some shit to justify why the char thinks that way or skip over justifying it and hope the narrative stays strong despite it?

While I'm not too familiar with the DCU- your batfam meta posts are intiguing- so in transfering some of the broader strokes from them- I think you tackling a 'Mark isn't Nolan's biological son' fic would be fascinating. Sort of a step to the side of the 'what if Mark never got his powers' fic that sometimes pop up in the fandom

OOOOOO chewing on this currently, hm, the much a distinct flavor of exactly what you’re talking about, but the potential for more family drama depending on WHO knows. Does Mark know?? Is he waiting every day only to be crushed? Does he confused non-Debbie features with Nolan’s? I suppose I’m not the most enthusiastic about non-power AUs, but I think there’s something very fun to explore about Mark having to settle with, if he knows all his life, he will never have powers? I think the trajectory of his dreams will obviously shift, I can see him still having that distinct fatherly idolization, but perhaps embraces being useful to the GDA? Cecil’s number one intern—only intern—curtesy of nepotism, ha! There is something tickling me about Mark taking the Robin Route/Role for the Teen Team in terms of having no powers, just insane skills, BUT there’s something way more delicious about intern Mark when s1e01 happens and Mark tries snooping around to find out the truth about what happened to his Dad.

I wonder if, with Mark having a whole another father, if they’re more or less distant relationship, depending on WHEN Nolan entered Mark’s life? Like if Debbie met Nolan later for this, or just for fun, they dated once, separated (Mark being born during then), then they happened to stumble into each others lives again and Mark’s already been born, anywhere from tween to teenager so there’s a gap in how close they are. I feel like one important aspect of the whole Family Drama is how close they’re supposed to be, a functional, loving family turned upside down? So I wonder what more distance does. I wonder how Nolan copes when his family is entirely human and he can’t project onto Mark.

I love thinking about these, omg.

[glittercake]

HUH? Okay so that meant that he couldn't appear in ANY capacity whatsoever except as a zombie who gets killed? Like not even as Falcon? Not even as something else in a show that is all about alternate story lines?

PLEASE 😂 get the fuck out of here.

[starry-bi-sky]

mmm throwaway conversation between Dan and Danny that popped into my head that I had to write out:

"You spent ten years being a one-man mass extinction event, then went back in time and fought me, and lost." Danny snarls, arms crossed and throat tight. His mouth pulls back to bare dagger-sharp teeth, and his eyes burn with the familiar thrum of ectoplasm heating up behind his eyes. "If I didn't believe you were half of Vlad before, I do now."

His other self -- and really, can he even call him that? He's half of Vlad too. Two halves severed from each other and welded together to make a new whole, -- snaps his head over to him. Wild-eyed and furious, he looks unlike the man Danny fought before, the one unruffled and untouched, unbothered by the world around him. It's familiar, but not like the way a reflection is.

"What's that supposed to mean." The Other hisses, matching Danny's scowl one-for-one with fangs much bigger and sharper than his.

But there's a reason lions fear hyenas. Danny matches the rumble in The Other's chest with one of his own, and shoves his face close to his. "I don't lose."

[s0fter-sin]

soap's whole deal being sniper and demolitions gets me going bc on the surface they sound so different but when you get into it, you realise it's bc soap's smart

sniping is all math; calculating distances and wind interference and bullet drop. something i think people overlook is he was listed as a sniper first so it can be implied that he's better at it than demolitions. he does more sniping in both campaigns than demolitions work; in capture or kill, ghost specifically calls on him to take down the aq snipers

and demolitions is math with a hit of chemistry; knowing what mixes with what, knowing how much to use, recognising environmental factors and adjusting accordingly. it's not just about the boom; so much work goes into contained/ planned explosions. especially when having enough power for a breacher charge and not bringing down the whole building is the difference between mission success and failure

the chemical bombs he makes in alone can't just be any old cleaners, they have to have the correct reaction to each other; he just knew off the top of his head what would mix with what to create what reaction. he would also potentially have to recognise them by sight/smell bc they would’ve been written in spanish

soap would also have to know architecture; recognising structural integrity and weak points so he knows exactly where to plant a charge to bring it down and how it'll come down

he has an incredible soldier's mind people just forget that bc he's sociable which itself is a skill

we know he tends to buck against orders he doesn't agree with like when he pushes back against ghost in capture or kill and shepherd when he tells them to release hassan

he gets closer to people and sees if he can trust them and that's when he follows them without question. really think about how he talks to alejandro and rudy; he asks about their home and alejandro's family and rudy's relationship with him. those aren't questions you ask a stranger after a few hours of knowing them. that's not even touching on his relationship with ghost

he also deliberately brings people of higher ranks down to his level; talking informally with ghost and giving him a shoulder punch, addressing alejandro (a colonel!!) by his first name and rudy by his nickname despite literally just meeting them. he personalises all of them and it’s in direct opposition to the reason most characters do that; it’s not due to insubordination or lack of respect, the more he respects and trusts someone, the more casual he is with them

he digs into people; he wants to know what makes them tick and that determines if he can one, trust them and two, follow their orders. once he decides that, he's the ultimate soldier; he bleeds loyalty which makes him vicious when that loyalty is taken for granted

he isn't naive or bubbly or insecure; he's an incredibly smart and aware soldier. he's aggressive and bloodthirsty and loyal and intuitive and i love him so much

[sizzlingcloudmentality]

I spun the wheel and got lucky. Then my mojo left me and I spun the wheel again. And even though the prompts are all lovely, I only had enough mojo left in me for one. Lou. Lou Bloom. And because I don't know how to keep things short, this thing got bigger than I've planned. Oops. Happy Valentine's Day 💘

heart shaped weirdness - Lou Bloom x reader

tw: Lou cosplaying as a normal person 🥰 what else is new, mentions of masturbation, mentions of canon typical violence (no main character death, don't worry), mentions of the Black Dahlia murder, not beta'd we die like heros

wc: 1.5k oops

You suspect that he likes you. He’s not as harsh to you than he is to his other employees. He also picks you for those shifts when he’s out on the hunt. He picks you specifically to join him. He gives you gooseflesh all over, not in the sexy kind of way though.

If you could work tonight, Lou asked earlier, his voice so sweet it almost clogged your phone speakers.

“But it’s Valentine's Day?” You didn't exactly have a plan for tonight, maybe stuffing your face, maybe rubbing one out. Probably both, because god damn, spending Valentine's Day as a single was no fun and you had to treat yourself with the simple pleasures life had to offer.

And spending the night in a car with Lou, always chasing the next gruesome accident or crime? Definitely not a simple pleasure.

“If I recall correctly, you are single. So please, be ready at 8, It'll pick you up,” he chirped and you knew exactly how his mouth twists into one of those practiced smiles while he talked.

“Fine,” you surrendered and ended the call before he could. A Valentine's Day shift. Maybe there'd be heart shaped murders. Heart shaped accidents. Heart shaped shootings in bars. Ah yes, love was in the air tonight, you already knew it.

8 pm sharp you leave your apartment building, looking out for one of the vans you usually use for work. But there’s none. You look around and then you spot him. Leaning against the hood of his flashy sports car stands Lou. Kind of dolled up, like he just had a business meeting. Or a date? He lifts his hand and waves, one of those sugar crust smiles on his face.

“You look nice,” he says and you almost laugh. You are in your work attire: faded out jeans and a hoodie.

“The only thing nice about me is that I took a shower. But thanks.”

You get a scowl from him, a flash of a scowl, a little bit of the sugar crust smile crumbling already. “Cut the attitude. And work on your ability to accept compliments.” He holds the door open for you, the passenger door.

“I’m not driving?” You always drive. It was your job. Your brows pinch together and his lips thin into a line. More sugar is crumbling.

“Not tonight, and for sure not my car. Get in.”

He watches you climb into his car and his eyes roll in their sockets but he quickly wipes the annoyance off his face when you finally sit down and look at him expectantly. God, it was not easy with you. You were so… mouthy. It was as exciting as much as it was getting on his nerves.

This was supposed to be a nice night. He was really trying to woo you. He googled it. He even had the checklist jotted down in his notebook. ‘Pick them up, preferably with a nice car' - check. ‘Compliment their appearance’ - check. He is doing it correctly, the wooing. Why do you have to be so defiant?

“Lou?” You raise your brows, looking at your boss and wait for him to finally get into the car, too. You just want get it over with. There were leftovers from your favorite Indian place in your fridge. You could be masturbating right now. If it wasn’t for Lou fucking Bloom.

“Attitude,” he warns, scowling once more before he gets into his car as well. You don't know when, but at one point in your work relationship you learned that he hated it when you were bratty. And you were having a field day with being bratty since then. It comes easy, you are a natural.

Sometimes he lashes out when you go too far. But that was nothing the well calculated use of wet, wide eyes and a stuttered ‘sorry’ couldn't fix. He always caves in. That's why you suspect he likes you. Because he sometimes lets you pull one of his many strings.

When the engine starts purring and Lou pulls from the curb you look to the backseats. Nothing. No camera, no battery packs, no lighting.

You glance at Lou. One hand on the steering wheel, his eyes glued to the road, one finger resting against the corner of his mouth. He is weird but tonight he is extra weird. Maybe Valentine's Day got to him. Heart shaped weirdness.

“Where's the equipment?”

“In the trunk.”

“Why?”

He turns towards you and forces a sugary smile on his face. “Because I put it there.”

A smartass attempt at being funny. You can appreciate that. It adds to his… odd charme.

“You're getting better with the jokes, boss,” you say and when he shoots you a look because of your sarcastic tone he catches you smiling. Genuinely smiling.

‘Make them laugh' - check.

There was nothing to do, no cameras to be prepped, no radio chatter to be deciphered. No smalltalk to be had because smalltalk with Lou was a painful thing. You already talked about everything smalltalk worthy before and it has left you feeling bare. Like he knew everything about you and all you knew about him was his name and his goal of being influential.

Sometimes he tries it again, the chatting, and asks you about your true crime fascination, your favorite murders and mysteries. But there’s only so much to tell, so much to talk about. You wordlessly agreed on only talking if it was necessary one night, after you squirmed under his never ending questions about food allergies, immediately followed up by the question how exactly the Black Dahlia was dismembered. Only to be topped off with a question about your menstrual cycle, because you seemed to be having PMS that night. You snapped at him, he snapped back. Trouble in paradise. Lou didn’t get what your problem was. He googled it afterwards. Turns out he was acting inappropriate. Bullshit. He was attentive.

The silence between you was somewhat comfortable tonight. Something is in the air though, this much you can tell. Lou reeks of that something. You can almost taste it on your tongue, this sticky something he is trying to hide behind his sugar crust grimace.

His smile seems to stretch with every mile adding to the mileage counter. Until he pulls into a quieter street. And then another one. And a last one. The engine dies and Lou turns towards you with a proud grin. The car parks in a quiet neighborhood, countless single story houses strung together like greyish-yellow teeth in the jaw of a skull.

He says nothing, he just smiles at you, proudly and boyish. The sticky something, this was it. Whatever it actually is. Heart shaped fucking weirdness, you think to yourself when you look at Lou.

“Happy Valentine's Day,” he says and somewhere down the empty street a dog barks.

You blink several times, your eyes finally narrowing, the confusion written all over your face. ‘Surprise them’ - check. Oh, he could check all of the boxes tonight, Lou just knew it.

“Wait here,” he says and scrambles out of the car, you have never seen him less graceful and more excited. And you have seen this man mighty excited. About blood and guts in places they don't belong. Maybe this was a good moment to start worrying.

But then he slides back into the driver's seat, a basket on his lap. The scent of butter chicken reaches your nose.

‘Get their favorite foods for a picnic' - check.

“You got me food?” That was… that was actually really nice of him.

“Obviously.” He rummages in the basket and produces cutlery and take away boxes, even napkins and a can of your favorite seltzer. You are stunned and his sugary smile gets even wider. “Do you know where we are?”

Balancing the food on your knees you look outside again. The only thing remarkable was a ‘no parking’ sign in front of the house across the street. You shake your head, still amazed by Lou’s surprise picnic.

“They found her here.”

“Found… who exactly?” Oh. Oh, he didn't. Or did he?

He nods his head when he sees the slow realization in your eyes. “The Black Dahlia. Right over there.” He gestures to the front lawn of that one house.

Your eyes widen and your mouth opens and closes again. “Oh fuck off!” You shove the food container back into his hands and exit the car in no time. In the orange light of the street lamp you cross the narrow street, the dog barking again.

‘Take them to a secret place for an extra big surprise' - check. The wooing is completed.

Lou watches you for a moment before he gets out of the car, joining you while you examine a patch of grass like a dog, almost sniffing and digging it. God, you are so weird, he thinks.

“Best Valentine's Day ever,” you murmur and crouch down to place a hand on the ground. You look over your shoulder, Lou towering over you with his weird big bug eyes. He looks cuter now, somehow. “Thank you!”

“You're welcome,” he replies nonchalantly but his proud smile gives him away. There is another checklist in his notebook. 5 steps to get her to jerk you off. “Happy Valentine's Day, Lou,” he mutters under his breath, continuing to watch you. Like he always does.

Thanks for reading until the end. I will post this separately soon-ish. Happy Valentine's Day!!

jake boys - valentine's edition

how are we feeling about another round of spin the wheel activities, dear Jake delegation? and yes, they are heart shaped and taste of sugar.

Rules:

spin this wheel and get your boy(s)

spin this wheel and get your date(s)

share your results in the comments or reblogs or tags, please sate my curiosity

let us know in the poll how happy you are with your valentine

(bonus points if you're feeling inspired and want to share your thoughts about your results, like people did here)

a huge shout-out to my baby @gyllenhaalstories who helped me with basically all of this. ilysm 💖

you can look up former community shenanigans here

Shamelessly tagging the crew (hit me up if you want me to stop annoying you):

@gyll-yee-haw @gyllenhaal-j @charliehoennam @cassiopeia-grimm @jennaajoseph

@davidayer @det-loki @gyllenflower @ascorpionstale

@anunusers @frozen-hearts-club @caffeineplusmypen @gyllencevans8 @greenparadiseperry

The crew=every blog that comes across my dash and interacts with Jake content. If we've never talked: hi! If you want to be part of the crew, dm me. ✨🫶🏻

divider: @saradika-graphics

[flying-cat]

people who undermine the importance of izuku and katsuki's relationship throughout bnha because of "annoying shippers" or because they just don't like katsuki are insane because their relationship is literally so? important??? to the entire story???? katsuki is the deuteragonist of bnha. he was one of the first characters to show up. he was the first other person to know about OFA. so much of the manga is spent showing his development. if you deny his character development and relationship development ("relationship" does not always mean romantic relationship) with izuku, you are quite literally denying a massive part of the series. the manga starts with them and ends with them. you're allowed to dislike him but if you dislike him so much that you, in turn, start hating how izuku is a "punching bag" or a "doormat" for the entire series because he doesn't stay angry and vengeful at people even though a massive part of his character is that he's compassionate and kind even to people who aren't to him or used to not be, and you seriously think that that makes him weak, and you just start to dislike the main two characters of the series, i think you should. idk. stop reading, probably. read the revenge fantasy shit that you obviously want to read. there are like seven million manhwa available to you where the character gets the revenge you so desperately want to see.