#just came from listening to the radio drama

[arnie-cunningham-official]

do you think the IHNMAIMS characters new the can opener was invented years after the cans and that, you can actually open a can by smashing it?

[kamaluhkhan]

TIME TO PRETEND

pairing: luke castellan x gn!poseidon!reader word count: 5k chapter summary: you're the eldest child of poseidon and the hero of the last great prophecy. you left your demigod life behind after defeating kronos. now, years later, you find yourself back at camp half blood for the summer.....which means dealing with luke castellan, and all that history (tension?) left unresolved between you. warnings: some nicknames for reader are based on female characters (mermista, sailor neptune) but they're still written as gender neutral. reader has tattoos. mention of alcohol + death (post-titan war). spoilers for the entire pjo (book) series, mostly references to the last olympian. timeline is all over the place but set in the early 2000s for vibes. no betrayal (au where chris was the one who sided w kronos and led the titan army) so slightly ooc luke <3 author's note: welcome to another product of my pjo hyperfixation !!! i wanted to finish the nemesis!reader series first but it's summer and i felt like reworking my tsitp series in a camp half-blood setting with bb luke. so prepare for childhood friends to lovers drama! summertime vibes! nostalgia! angst! would love to know what y'all think about this and if you want a part 2 so feel free to scream at me in the comments. otherwise, enjoy and thanks 4 reading 💙

♪: time to pretend by mgmt

YOU’VE GOT MAIL!

1 new message 

from: LukeNotSkywalker

to: Mermista86

subject: you are GETTING that record deal

Hey,

Your demo CD just came in the mail — and, Connor as my witness, I’ve already listened to it five times!!! 

It’s amazing. You’re amazing. The label would totally lose out if they didn’t sign you. 

Things have been pretty chaotic around here, with the summer term happening soon. Speaking of which: are you coming back? Chiron gave me the list of returning campers and counsellors this morning and said he hadn’t heard from you, so I thought I’d ask. I know you’ll be busy with the band, but if you get the chance, it’d be really great to see you.

Anyways, I’m leading the next Shield & Sword session, so I’d better go. Talk soon ;)

- L

FOUR YEARS LATER

TURBULENT WATERS? ALT-ROCK BAND MIDNIGHT SIRENS HIT ROUGH PATCH AFTER LEAD GUITARIST GETS INTO VIOLENT ALTERCATION 

the cover is the nail in the coffin: a blurry picture of you, an electric blue guitar forgotten at your feet, lunging forward into a crowd, with your bandmates on stage behind you in shock. 

you’d gone all this time without any major incidents, and one stupid chimera managed to burn down everything you worked for in one fell swoop.

“that’d be $8.50,” the cashier informs. 

you tear your attention away from the magazine, instead fishing through your pocket for some change. meanwhile, the cashier furrows their brow, leans down slightly to get a better look at you underneath your sunglasses and baseball cap. 

“hey, do i know you?”

“nope,” you say instantly, slapping a $10 bill onto the counter. “keep the change.” you gather your pile of necessary roadtrip supplies (slushies, m&m’s, and goldfish) before rushing out the door, your half-brother trailing behind you.

you slide into the driver’s seat, set each slushie in a cup holder, and hand the rest to percy once he’s slipped into the passenger side. 

“seatbelt,” you remind him. you shake your hair out after removing your baseball cap disguise. “i promised your mom i’d be responsible.” 

percy does as he’s told, though not without mumbling about how he’s practically an adult and a demigod who’s been in much more dangerous situations than a car ride up to long island. you just tell him to put on some music, even though he has a point. he’ll be 18 in august and you’re only five years older, but the fact is that you gave sally jackson your word. 

plus — you’re his older sibling, so gods forbid you let him get hurt. a seatbelt seems like a band-aid solution for one of the most powerful demigods out there, but still.

percy flips through a few radio stations while he sips his blue raspberry slushie. when he doesn’t find anything good, he opens the glove compartment and surveys your music collection before sliding a cd into the stereo. 

instantly, the familiar sound of david bowie’s voice eases the tension in your shoulders.

“good choice?” 

you nod and percy smiles triumphantly. you reach over to steal a few goldfish from the bag he just opened and ruffle his hair playfully, for good measure. 

you’re perfectly happy, driving along a long island highway while getting lost in the glam rock world of ziggy stardust, but it isn’t long until percy interrupts: 

“are you finally gonna tell me what happened, or do i have to read it from some trashy gossip magazine like everyone else?”

“well, your dyslexic ass can barely read so….”

you look over at him briefly, and laugh when you see him stick his slightly-blue tongue out to you. 

“at least my dyslexic ass is actually decent at ancient greek. luke told me you failed the reading test, like, a million times.”

your heart twinges at the mention of your old friend. 

friend.

if you could still call him that. 

thankfully, percy doesn’t give you much room to dwell on the past, too focused on your drama-filled present.

“so, what is it? you got kicked out of the band? lost everything? have nowhere else to go?”

you roll your eyes at his dramatics. “i did not get kicked out.” 

“then, what happened?”

“just the usual.” you shrug. “monster attack, mortals who can’t see through the mist. i tried to explain it away after — something about how i saw someone in the crowd attack another person and i stepped in to help. most people bought it, but the media loves drama and the label’s worried i’m a flight risk now. apparently, everything will blow over if i just keep a low profile for the next few months. so….no. i didn’t lose everything.” you take a deep, like when anyone other than children of poseidon are about to go underwater and they’re not quite sure when they can come up for air. 

“i just don’t really have anywhere else to go,” you finish.

“damn.” percy offers you a blue shark gummy (or whale - you and percy had already debated the shape of the candy that sally packed for the trip, and the jury’s still out). you gratefully accept. “well, i know it’s not the best reason, but i’m excited to spend the summer together.”

despite everything, you find yourself smiling. 

“me too, kid.” 

“it’d give me a chance to kick your ass in sword-fighting.”

“you wish!” you nudge his shoulder, both of you giggling. once the laughter’s died down, you glance at percy once more. “hey – did you tell anyone i was coming?”

percy shakes his head. “why?”

you take a long swig of your drink until you’re on the brink of brain freeze. 

“no reason.”

it’s just after lunch when you arrive at camp half-blood. 

you weren’t sure what you were expecting — maybe not some futuristic technological developments that had been discovered within the years you were gone, but definitely not for camp to look pretty much exactly the same as when you left. 

instantly, you find comfort in the familiar scenes: a dragon, peleus, guarding the magical borders; dryads and satyrs picking strawberries in the fields next to the forest; chiron standing near the central guidepost, greeting and guiding every camper in the right direction.

chiron smiles down at percy and practically does a double take when his eyes land on you.

“mx. l/n! it has been a while. are you here to drop off your brother, or do you plan on staying for the summer?”

before you can answer, someone appears behind him. 

“perce! hey!” 

“hey, luke.”

luke gives him a side hug, and percy shoves him away with a laugh when he ruffles his hair. it’s then that luke acknowledges you, though he looks like that’s the last thing he wants to do.

“i thought i’d never see you again. what are you doing here? ”

chiron turns to you expectedly. “i believe you have yet to answer that question of mine as well.”

“staying for the summer…” you adjust the shoulder strap of your backpack, uneased by luke’s cold demeanor. “i hope that’s okay.”

“of course!” chiron’s smile grows wide, eyes crinkling. “you’ll resume your position as head counsellor of cabin 3.”

“so i’m dethroned? just like that?” percy guffaws.

you nudge percy’s shoulder. “fulfill the next great prophecy, and then we’ll talk.” 

percy rolls his eyes playfully. luke, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to appreciate your tongue-in-cheek remark. his jaw tightens, and he suddenly finds a deep interest in the clipboard he’s holding.

chiron clears his throat, likely sensing the tension. “yes, well, i’m sure you remember how things work around here. if not, mr. castellan has been keeping this ship afloat. he's always here to help.”

“always.” luke smiles, but it’s elastic, threatening to snap at any moment. someone calls his name, and he walks away to deal with whatever chaos is waiting for him.

summer — age 15

you weren’t exactly conscious when you first arrived at camp half-blood. 

apparently, coach hedge, a satyr and protector, found you just in time and had to practically drag you up half-blood hill after a particularly gruesome fury attack. 

when you woke up and saw luke sleeping next to you in a chair, his curls overgrown and falling onto his eyes, you thought you had died and gone to elysium. 

you took in your unfamiliar surroundings. some sort of infirmary, with only your best friend next to you, the one you hadn’t seen in almost a year since you’d parted ways. 

then, you remembered what was happening before you passed out; it was more likely that you were being tricked into a false sense of security by that fury, who definitely planned on devouring you later.

with a newfound sense of urgency, you decided it was time to get out of there before it was too late. you were reaching for your knife when you felt a hand grab your shoulder. without losing a second, you twisted your body around, weapon at the ready.

whoever it was watching over you sure looked like luke. he was wearing a bright orange shirt and leather cord necklace with one clay bead. another point of difference was the jagged scar that cut across his left cheek.

“it’s just me,” he said, gently. “you’re fine here. you’re safe.”

you weren’t convinced, kept your knife in front of you to keep distance. “prove it.” you narrowed your eyes. “tell me something only luke would know.”

“you’re left-handed.”

“that’s a great observation,” you scoff.

“storm is your favourite x-men character.”

“that’s a very popular opinion.”

“your aunt would make us mango lassi after swim camp when she got home from work,” luke tries for the third time. “and, my mom - she used to call you ‘starfish.’”

your heart skipped a beat.

that was the confirmation you needed. 

the knife dropped from your hand, clattered on the wooden floor, as you pulled luke in for a hug. you were greeted by a familiar scent, that pear shampoo luke loved because it made his hair so soft, mixed with the smell of fresh pine trees. 

“it’s really you,” you mumbled into his shoulder.

despite sleeping for gods know how long, you were exhausted. you rested your weight into luke, but he didn’t seem to care.

“it’s really you. i thought i’d never see you again.”

“where are we?” you asked, breaking away to face luke. you ignored the wooziness you felt throughout your body; luke seemed to sense it, his grip around you tightening. “are annabeth and thalia here, too? how’d you get here?” your thumb traced the unfamiliar scar on his face. “what happened? are you okay —”

“i-i’ll answer all your questions, but you lost a lot of blood.” luke guided you to lay back down in bed. “we’ll explain everything. just get some rest.”

a third scenario entered your mind: this was all a dream. you’d close your eyes and when you opened them again, luke would be gone. you’d be alone again.

you couldn’t let go of luke’s hand, even as he tucked you back into bed. you tugged his wrist, silently urging him to join you.

“will you stay with me?” you finally croaked when he continued standing. 

luke looked at you, and you nodded once as final confirmation. then, he removed his shoes and slipped into the bed next to you. it was luke, all sweet pear and soft curls and strong heartbeat, and you held on to him in fear that he might slip away.

“always,” he whispered.

during the orientation video you were later shown, you learned that camp half-blood’s motto is keeping young heroes safe (mostly) for over three millennia!  

luke had used that word, too. safe.

chiron told you this was to be your new home as he walked you to the poseidon cabin. he told you that you were safe now, though you noticed how the word almost got caught in his throat. he gave you a sad smile you didn’t quite understand.

you did wonder, at first, if those words were true: this place, a home for you and other children of gods. somewhere safe.

and, well.

you came to understand chiron’s general melancholy a few weeks later, and every week after that. he was used to training and sending heroes off to their potential death, and you would be no different. stolen lightning bolts, deadly quests, cryptic prophecies. a pending war between divine forces you had been entangled with long before you knew. heartache and betrayal and loss beyond measure. 

but, there were other things, too. 

annabeth, fitting in perfectly at the athena cabin, continued being her genius self, leading her team to victory every capture the flag game. she was extra patient in helping you with ancient greek, especially after chiron had given up.

chris rodriguez, luke’s half-brother, would tell you jokes from across the dining pavilion, knowing that you hated sitting alone at the poseidon table. michael yew, son of apollo, taught you how to play guitar at the bonfire one week; you’d ask for more and more lessons until you could start playing on your own. charles beckendorf made you a celestial bronze sword that shone like that burst of light when the sun hits the ocean at sunset. it transformed into a ring that you would never take off, unless in battle. you might not have gotten along with mr. d, but you spent free time picking fresh strawberries with his son, castor. you made matching friendship bracelets with silena beauregard, who was really the only person you confided in, about how you maybe possibly felt something other than friendship when it came to luke. she told you about her crush on clarisse larue, the daughter of ares whom you would always partner with during sparring practice. you taught ethan nakamura, who didn’t have his own cabin as the child of nemesis, how to properly hold a sword. thalia’s tree stood tall at the top of the hill where you almost bled to death, protecting you and everyone inside the magical borders. you, annabeth, and luke would share a picnic there every thursday.

you had been on the run for so long, always looking over your shoulder for monsters, sleeping with one eye open to be one step ahead of death, jumping from one place to the next so quickly to avoid danger.

so, yes. 

it was nice to stay in one place, where you knew you were as safe as demigods could be. it was nice to spend your time learning and training and laughing instead of just surviving. 

it was nice to have a place to call home. and people to call it home with.

now 

the first week passes in the blink of an eye, and it’s like you never left.

tie-dye, volleyball, strawberry picking, kitchen duty, and cabin inspection. 

luke has everyone on a tight schedule — one, you notice, conveniently places the two of you at opposite ends of camp at all times.

still, you catch up with clarisse and the stoll brothers, spend time with annabeth and percy, say hi to pollux and katie gardner and others you vaguely recognize as five years older than what you remember. there are also a lot of faces you don’t recognize at all.

of course, you try not to think about the faces you wished you could see: friends you grew up with and would never have a laugh with again, younger campers you had trained who would never grow up. all lost because of the gods and the titans and a prophecy you never asked to be a part of. 

it’s a side effect of being back here; their ghosts are harder to ignore.

again — trying not to think about it.

anyways.

climbing wall, armory, sword-fighting practice, archery field, and free time on the beach.

to conclude: capture-the-flag, a friday night camp-half blood tradition.

you’re praising annabeth for her latest strategy that led to blue team victory when you notice luke. he was also on the blue team, but instead of celebrating with the rest of you, he’s speaking to someone who’s wearing a red helmet. they seem to be in a heated discussion, one that luke is not wanting to continue. his tells are the same, after all these years: the impatient tapping of his foot, his eyes searching for an out.

you give it to him.

“sorry, i need to borrow this guy.” you say, grabbing luke’s wrist. “camp emergency.” 

if the person said anything, you didn’t hear it, because you were already dragging luke away from the crowd, towards the armory shed. 

“what’s the emergency?” luke wonders, brows furrowed in concern. he has deep shadows under his eyes, too. keeping the ship that is camp half-blood afloat has clearly taken a toll on him. 

“you wanting to get out of that conversation. you’re welcome.” you wink at him; luke flushes, and you’re not sure if it’s because he’s annoyed, or if he's just flustered. “so, are you gonna keep ignoring me the whole summer?”

you put your helmet on one of the shelves and turn back to luke. you expected him to start removing his armor as well, but he doesn’t. he just glares at you, arms crossed over his chest.

so, he’s annoyed, then. 

“what do you expect?” luke hisses. “you can’t come back here and pretend that everything can be like it was when we were kids. things are different now, especially between us.”

you decide to take him up on his challenge. 

“oh? tell me, luke, what exactly is different between us?”

luke shakes his head in disbelief. you remove your chest plate, and that’s when the tattoo on your waist becomes visible. it’s a magnolia, like one of the flowers that bloomed on the tree outside may castellan’s house. 

something in luke softens, then. he sighs. 

“you could have at least given me a warning.”

he storms off, and you’re left half-armored, wondering what he meant by that.

you figure it out once a few of you settle down for a late-night, underground poker game, and you’re trying not to stare at luke’s hands.

it starts with you telling yourself that you’re just trying to predict what cards he’s holding, figure out if he’s bluffing, and if he’s about to lose everything he’d so confidently bet on. 

but then you notice the silver thumb ring that thalia got him for his 17th birthday. you notice an array of hair ties and elastic bands he keeps just in case a camper needs them, and woven bracelets given to him by his admirers. you notice how the tattoo on his wrist is covered. (it’s hidden well, but you know it’s there — you’d gotten one of a wing, the kind that might be found on a pair of magical red converse, at the same time)

you also notice the forest green painted on luke’s nails, the same shade worn by the person beside him.

van, the new head counsellor of the hephaestus cabin. you’d seen them at staff meetings, but you somehow did not notice that they were dating luke. 

he moved on — is that why luke needed a warning? is that what's changed between you?

it’s fine. whatever. so what if luke has a new partner? it’s not like the two of you were anything, officially. 

luke has a new partner. they’re wearing matching nail polish. they’re one of those couples.

well, van is also wearing a nickleback shirt and luke hates nickleback, unless that fundamental part of his personality changed, too. 

“yo, sailor neptune. you in or not?” travis brings you out of your daze, by using a nickname luke once called you.

back before becoming heroes, when you and luke were just kids, you’d watch cartoons in his living room on saturday mornings — x-men, she-ra: princess of power, teenage mutant ninja turtles, sailor moon. a lifetime ago.

you look around the table and see that everyone has been waiting for you to take your turn. even luke raises an eyebrow at you.

“yeah.” you clear your throat and throw some chips into the centre. “i’m in.”

you have decent enough cards to keep you in the game, and you’re comfortable that you can play the odds in your favor. the stoll brothers are good liars, you know that, and so is luke. malcolm pace is good at strategy, but thankfully not as good as his half-sister annabeth. pollux, who had invited you to the game, already folded along with butch, the son of iris who has a rainbow tattoo on his bicep to prove it. beside you, lou ellen, daughter of the hecate, contemplates her next move. clovis has fallen asleep, true to their title as head counsellor of the hypnos cabin. you can’t get a read on van, but they keep raising the stakes so confidently, and you’ve always liked a good challenge.

soon enough, it’s only you and van in the bet. when it comes time to reveal your cards, you curse yourself for overplaying your hand.

“good game,” van says to you as they collect their winnings. “you really had me going there.” 

“yeah.” your smile is strained, but it’s there nonetheless. “tried my best.”

“guess the curse of achilles doesn’t help as much in poker as it does in capture the flag.” 

“excuse me?” you raise an eyebrow.

luke, who had one arm casually draped around van’s chair the entire game, pulls away. “van, maybe don’t —”

“it’s not like it’s a secret, luke. they’re the prophecy kid, everyone knows they bathed in the river styx to be able to fight kronos. it’s camp legend.”

other than you, luke, and van, everyone else is occupied with something else. connor busies himself shuffling the cards, while lou ellen, malcolm, and pollux get up for more drinks. it seems like butch and travis have their own bet going to see who can balance the most chips on clovis’ forehead without waking him up. 

van waits for an answer. you’re a little queasy, and it’s not from the wine pollux managed to snag from his dad’s office. you’re suddenly faced with the reality that your life is reduced to a legend. you try your best to swallow that feeling, of being made into a greek tragic hero while your heart is still beating, and your life is still a mess.

“that’s relevant, why?”

“just that some people might consider the invulnerability thing an unfair advantage in physical competitions like capture the flag,” van explains. “increased strength and all that.” 

“that would mean nothing without a good strategy,” you counter.

“that’s what i said,” luke grumbles. 

you recognize van now as the person luke was arguing with earlier. it must have been about this. 

about you. 

“okay, y’all were best friends, so luke is obviously going to take your side.”

you’re not sure what stings more: friends or were. 

“although, he never really talks about you, which is weird because you’re, like, famous in and outside camp.”

ouch. that definitely stings the most. luke winces slightly, almost like he feels it, too.

“alright, alright,” connor interjects, shuffling the cards in his hands. “another round?” 

you’re the only one who decides to call it a night. everyone says goodbye; even van, who’s blissfully unaware of the effect their words had on you. luke avoids your gaze. the game continues without you.

percy’s snoring provides enough cover as you sneak into your shared cabin. you try to sleep, but it doesn’t come easy. 

you feel the spot underneath your rib, the one spot you’re truly vulnerable, ache.

summer — age 17

for the first time in your life, you couldn’t breathe underwater. you were swimming in acid, and your skin was melting away.

at least, that’s what it felt like to bathe in the river styx. achilles could have mentioned that, but all he gave was a cryptic warning about anchoring yourself to what makes you mortal.

you really tried at first. you thought about your friends at camp. you thought about percy, about your aunt back when she was still around. you even thought about may castellan, burnt cookies and saturday mornings.

the pain was too much, though. 

you were forgetting where you were, who you were. with every passing second, you were dissolving into nothing.

“if you wanted to go for a swim, you should have told me. i would have worn my swimsuit.”

luke’s voice echoed across the waves. you tilted your head up to see him sitting on the dock above you, his feet dangling into the water. he had rolled up his jeans to just above his ankles so they didn’t get wet, but his shoes were still on, which was a bit strange. the sun made his eyes look like burnt amber, his teeth sparkling as he smiled at you. 

okay. cool.

you were at camp. it was mid-afternoon, free period. the two of you had been at the edge of the lake, until you became impatient and jumped in, fully clothed. behind him, you could see that annabeth, thalia, and percy were waiting for you on the shore. they were each wearing orange camp shirts, which was also strange; you couldn’t remember a time when you were all there together, as campers.

“we better go, sailor,” luke said, amusement laced throughout his words. “come on. those cabins aren’t gonna inspect themselves.”

luke extended his hand to you. when you hesitated, he added:

“i can’t do this without you. will you stay with me?”

you reached up and grabbed luke’s hand.

always.

you emerged from the water, catching your breath as you collapsed on the sand. 

“oh gods. are you okay?”

your cousin, nico diangelo, son of hades, knelt down next to you. he tried to check your pulse, but you waved him away. your eyes searched for luke, but he wasn’t there, despite feeling the ghost of his hand in your own. 

oh.

you weren’t at camp; you were in the underworld. it was nico’s idea for you to take on the curse of achilles so that you’d be strong enough to face kronos. 

“did it work?”

you got up, a bit uneasy on your feet at first. nico helped steady you, his hands cold on your skin.

you felt….stronger wasn’t the right word. you felt adrenaline coursing through your veins, like you could swim across the biggest ocean without pausing once. like you could defeat an entire army and not break a sweat. maybe even take down a titan or two while you're at it.

you needed to see luke again, to meet him and the others in manhattan before it was too late.

“let’s hope so.”

now

you always loved mornings at camp half-blood. the beach was particularly beautiful at sunrise, the water peaceful.

the morning after that impromptu poker game, you need that peacefulness to wash over you. you’re awake after a rather sleepless night, deciding to go for a quick run before breakfast. you get dressed and grab your mp3 player, as quietly as you can to avoid waking up percy (who, truthfully, could probably sleep through a hurricane anyways). 

you jog from one end of the beach to the other. you set a steady rhythm, somewhere between the beat of your music and the sound of waves gently washing over the shore. when you make your way back down to where you started, you notice someone sitting nearby.

luke doesn’t say anything when you first sit next to him. he’s wearing a dark blue hoodie over his usual orange shirt, a cigarette tucked behind his ear. you imagine that he confiscated it from a camper on the way here. 

“morning,” he finally whispers, eyes fixed towards the ocean. 

you shiver, and not just from the cool morning air. you’re reminded of the last time luke spoke to you so softly, the last time you’d caught an early morning sunrise together. such a contrast to where you are now.

“morning,” you finally reply. 

as the sound of waves fills the silence between you, luke surprises you by taking a lighter out of his pocket. he lights the cigarette and takes a puff. then, he hands it to you. 

it’s such an odd, though not unwelcomed, gesture. a peace offering, you figure, but it’s just so not luke that you can’t help yourself.

“is golden boy luke castellan, offering me contraband? what planet am i on?”

the hint of a smile creeps onto his face. “like i said: things are different now,” he echoes his words from the night before, but this time you don’t sense any hostility.

you take a drag of the cigarette. your fingers brush against his when you return it to him.

you decide to offer a peace offering as well, and present to him one of your earbuds — he accepts. you have to slide across the sand to move closer to him, but he doesn’t seem to mind. 

i’m feelin’ rough, i’m feeling raw / i’m in the prime of my life….

as the song plays, you glance to see luke nodding along, tapping a finger on his knee to the beat. he lets the cigarette smoulder in his other hand.

we’re fated to pretend / to pretend / yeah, yeah, yeah….

when the song is over, luke turns to you. 

“new group?” he brings the cigarette to his lips, then gives it back to you.

“kinda.” you inhale, letting the smoke warm your lungs before explaining. “this is considered they’re breakthrough album. they’re from connecticut, actually.”

“oh, yeah? guess that’s where all the talent is from.”

luke bumps his shoulder against yours knowingly. you feel your cheeks heat up at his praise, his witty sincerity.

this is familiar — you and luke, at the beach, sharing music. it’s familiar, and for a few moments, you can act like there isn’t a wall between you, of unresolved feelings and harsh words. you can pretend that nothing has changed.

“you know, nickleback are from connecticut, too. which means you just called them talented.”

luke coughs on some smoke as he exhales with a laugh. “what? no i didn’t!”

“in a roundabout way. i always knew you were an undercover fan,” you tease.

“i have better taste than that.”

“do you?”

“you’re fucking with me,” luke deadpans.

you crack a smile. “yeah, i’m fucking with you.”

“gods, you scared me for a second,” he laughs, and you can’t help but follow. luke glances at you and the sunshine highlights his smile, his dark brown curls, the ever-changing color of his eyes. golden, radiant. 

you shiver again, looking away. before you know it, you feel something draped across your shoulders.

“i’m not sure van would like it if i was wearing your hoodie.” you joke, but your words are laced with a bitterness you hope luke doesn’t catch. unlucky for you, luke still knows you too well, whether he likes it or not.

“you don’t get to do that.”

“do what?”

luke scoffs. “be jealous.” 

“well, you don’t get to tell me how to feel.”

“so, you are jealous?”

you exhale sharply; you can practically feel the wall between you two reappear.

“it’s too early, lu. and i’m too hungover to deal with this.”

there’s nothing more left to say. you get up, throw his hoodie on the sand, and walk back towards your cabin, the beach and luke further away with every step you take.

it makes sense that way: you were always the one to leave first.

[bookshelfdreams]

the thing about night vale that makes it stand out to this day and makes even the old episodes hold up is how unabashedly unashamedly queer it is

and I don't just mean that cecil declare es his undying love for a man he saw once within the first 10 minutes of the entire show. I don't just mean the many, many casually lgbt+ characters

I mean that it's just. So fucking weird.

like the first thing to understand about it is that long-form fiction podcasts like this weren't really a thing before. night vale was foundational to not only it's genre, but it's format. audio dramas weren't dead exactly, but they were going out of style, who listened to the radio for fiction in 2012?

and Fink & Cranor just came along and went fuck you, we're gonna do what we want. we're gonna tell the stories we want to tell how we want to tell them.

there's a giant glow cloud that drops dead animals. DO NOT APPROACH THE DOG PARK.

like. I can't really express it. but from its very first moments it was just so. genuine. like you could really feel that this was written by people just doing whatever they thought would be fun or cool or interesting, who wrote for themselves and didn't really care about reaching an audience.

hey apropos of nothing let's do a psa about what color helicopters are most likely to abduct your children. have you heard about throat spiders?

and it works! too this day it still works because it's fun and scary and heartfelt and weird as all fuck

of course a website full of queer weirdos would fall in love with this

[uyuuma]

“ I HOPE YOU KNOW I'M FADED ”

drunk!gojo x exgf!reader ღ MDNI.

❥ summary. you and your toxic ex, gojo, broke up months ago. yet you find his drunk ass outside your apartment door.

❥ warnings. nsfw, female anatomy, toxic ex, manipulative gojo, dub con, dacryphilia, use of the name 'daddy', alcohol mentioned, tw: toxic relationship dynamic, etc.

❥ a/n. okok this one i thought of while i was bored at work, hope y'all enjoyyyy. i had to resubmit this post bc it got taken down bruh lets hope it doesnt happen again (title was inspired from the song 'spotlight' by lil peep; it is encouraged to listen while reading :3)

❥ wc. 3.2k

Your life has been rather drama-free ever since you broke up with Satoru Gojo.

After the constant arguments and severe manipulation that he had put you through, you decided enough was enough and you told him to essentially fuck off.

But if you were being honest with yourself, you weren't fully over him yet. In fact, life may have been drama-free but it became so boring after that. In some kind of fucked up way, you kind of missed the rollercoaster of emotions he put you through.

That's just how things are you guess, prioritizing your peace over that man was the healthier decision in the long run. You blocked his number and all of his social media as well as ghosting all of your mutuals, like Suguru and Shoko. It was a tough decision but you were tired of them asking about you and Satoru. He's done enough damage to your life already.

It's been radio silence since then, wonderful peace and quiet for two whole months. You found yourself taking up old hobbies again, exercising regularly, and even talking to other men. Life was right back on track and you were on your way to properly healing.

Unfortunately, it wasn't enough because he still knew where you lived. You didn't really bank on the fact he would come banging on your door. You believed he would just move on, since he is Satoru Gojo after all. Any woman would be head over heels for the handsome man, even if he was toxic as fuck.

But no, god dammit it all, he is still stuck on you.

Loud banging could be heard on your apartment door. It scared the living daylights out of you when you shot up from beneath your covers. You thought that there was someone trying to break in or perhaps your building manager was trying to alert you to a fire. You immediately rolled out of bed and ran to the door.

That's when you heard that cursed voice.

"Open uppppp!" the voice slurred on the other side.

You groan an exasperated "Noooooo fuckkkk!" under your breath after realizing it's your ex.

"Baby please... I know you're in thereeee" He said in a joking manner.

You open the door a crack, not unhooking the chain lock. "Go away, I told you I never wanted to see you again." You said coldly. Your voice was also a tad raspy, as you had just woken up from a deep slumber.

"Baby don't be like that, let daddy in will you?" He purred through the crack of the door. You could tell he was under the influence of something and it caused you to roll your eyes.

"Fuck no, now leave before I call the cops." You threatened as you went to shut the door.

The door came to a halt with a loud 'THUD'. Satoru grabbed the chain lock with his fist and he held it open before you could shut it. You gasp and jolt back from the audacity that this guy had.

"No no no no no, you're not listening t'me. I wanna talk to you." He said as he tried to pull the chain off the door.

You knew he had the strength to do it too and you didn't feel like replacing it so you annoyedly invited him in.

"Christ, fine but only for a bit! Do you understand me?" You said sharply, unlocking the chain.

"Anything you want, mama." He said grinning, he swiped the door open wide to let his towering frame through the doorway.

You click your tongue in irritation as you quietly close the door behind him. "What do you want, Satoru? It is 3 in the fucking morning!" You whisper yelled.

"Shhhhshhhshh" He spat out at you, putting his long finger against your lips, hushing you. "I just missed you so much, hehe." He found it amusing you were getting angry and it only triggered you more.

"Don't touch me, you're not my boyfriend anymore." You said smacking his hand away from you.

"Says who?" He asks confusedly. He tilts his head to the side.

"Says me!" You said trying not to scream too loud and wake the neighbors.

"Pshhh nah ah!" He says as he smirks. "I say we just forgive each other and move on, huh?" He proposes the idea, with full confidence.

You let out a laugh in disbelief. "Each other? You prick, you're the one that manipulated me and used me! If anything you should be begging me for forgiveness! And you can start by leaving!" Your voice was starting to get louder, but you were beyond infuriated right now.

"What are y'talking about? Don't start with this crazy shit." He said with a twinge of irritation in his voice. He slouched a lot worse than usual, his hands stuffed into the pocket of his sweats. He was wearing that stupid compression shirt that would always make your head spin when you saw it.

He also reeked of alcohol. It was safe to say that the dude was drunk. It took a lot just to get him tipsy, so for him to be this drunk it must've meant he's been at it all night.

"Look baby, I just came from Sukuna's house party and it made me realized how much I missed youuu." he said, his eyes all glossy.

Oh? So, he decided to crawl back after drinking himself silly at some house party? This guy couldn't get anymore pathetic, you thought to yourself. "You stink of booze, get out of my apartment you bum." You said pointing out the door. "I don't need you ruining my life again."

"C'mon don't be like that princess, you know the only thing I'd ever ruin is your slutty little holes." He said, smirking. He grabbed your chin with his hand and brought you close to his face. You could smell the whiskey still hot on his breath.

You were so beyond done with this. "You're repulsive, do not talk about me like that." All of the emotions you had that you've suppressed came back and all at once. You could feel that all too familiar burning in your eyes and throat.

You went silent and smoothed over your hair with your hand, trying to soothe yourself. Do not let him make you cry again. You took a few deep breaths before continuing.

"Look I know you're fucked up, but you need to call an Uber and leave immediately." You said looking up into his eyes to show how serious you were being.

He just continued to give you this cocky smirk while tuning you out. He just won't fucking listen to you.

"Ok! Well here this shit is again! You never take me seriously! It's like I'm this big fucking joke to you!" You yelled out, letting your emotions start to swell inside your chest.

Tears began to spill from your eyes as months and months of frustrations started to unravel. You looked down and brought your sleeve to wipe your tears. "Well, I won't take it anymore! I-" Suddenly you found that your breath was suddenly snatched from your lungs, after looking back up at him.

Satoru was palming his hard-on while you were sobbing. He was getting off to your tears. The fucking bastard.

"Are you─!" You were cut off by Satoru's moans.

"Fuck, you are so sexy when you get all emotional like that. God, I just want to shut you up with my cock." He said eyes fixated on your face.

"You cannot be serious right now!" You've had enough of his shit, you shoved him, trying to get him out the door.

"Oooh playin' rough with me princess?" He doesn't budge from you trying to push him. "Aww, if only you weren't so weak." He says as he wraps his hand around your wrist and pulls it up. He yanks your hand above your head and watches you squirm.

He looks thoroughly amused and cracks a smile when you fight back.

"Aw I miss this, us arguing and fighting. It always gets my blood pumping." he said, shoving you to your knees.

You tried to fight where this was inevitably going to end up, but it was no use. Satoru was just too damn strong and too damn convincing.

He hisses as he frees his dick from his sweats. It bobs up and down from the sudden release. Your eyes follow it, mesmerized with how big it was. It's been a few months since you last saw it. You had so many conflicting thoughts racing through your head as you silently knelt on the floor below him.

"Suck." He commanded, holding his tip to your lips. His precum lubricated your soft lips, making you feel sticky already.

You shook your head and used your hands to push away from it using his thighs as leverage. You didn't want to give into him, not after everything.

"No fuck- c'mon baby just open wide." He cooed out to you. Even now he was deciding everything for you. He decided you were going to suck his dick and that's what you were going to do.

It was a struggle between you pushing away and him grabbing your hair and pushing your head down onto his cock. Between his groans in anticipation and your whines in protest, he became increasingly impatient.

"No no no, shhhshhh... that's a good girl." He hiccupped. Satoru successfully got your mouth to take his tip. He grunted and tilted his head back slightly, feeling you slowly but surely take his length.

"Oh fuck, I missed your mouth so much baby." He purred as he parted your hair out of your face.

You closed your eyes in defeat as tears began sliding down your cheeks. He held your head still with one hand gripping on your pony tail and pumped himself in and out of your mouth.

"Fuuuuck, no matter where I looked I couldn't find another girl who satisfied me like you do." He started to invade your throat with his length, making your esophagus become sore and your lungs burn from the lack of air.

You choked on his cock, saliva dripping down your chin and neck, as well as down his balls. Your fingernails dug deep into his thighs, trying to either push yourself off or for leverage. One of the two, you didn't know anymore. All you knew was that little warm sensation that built between your legs. Your body was betraying you, you were supposed to hate this man, to not let him abuse you anymore. But fuck, his cock hit all the right places in your tight throat. Your eyes begin to cross as you struggle to breathe.

"Shit, you swallow me so good. Mmm, tell me you want daddy to cum down your throat." He said fucking into your mouth, your lewd slurping sounds were very pleasing to his ears.

You let out a muffled moan in response, obviously you couldn't say anything but that was enough of an answer for him.

"Oh fuck, take my load." he ordered, his abs flexing as he came. He groaned as he painted your throat white with his seed. You could feel the hot, sticky fluid make its way down your throat as you swallowed it all.

More tears fell onto your cheeks. "Hate you, 'toru." you whined out, throat still raw from his dick forcing its way in.

Satoru gave you that cocky smile again and tapped his cock against your cheek as you pouted. "Still harddd." he sang. "Wanna be a doll f'me and get on all fours?" He said wiping the spit off your chin.

You were so disappointed in yourself. This man was forcing himself back into your life and all you could do was watch as it happened. You looked up at him and see that faded look in his eyes. They say that drunk words were sober thoughts, has he been wanting to do this for two months?

Despite everything, you did exactly as he said. You turned around and lowered yourself onto all fours. Truth is, your pussy was aching for him and it had been since you guys broke up. Those men couldn't satisfy you and neither could your dildo, at least not like how Satoru can. Perhaps this whole situation was inevitable.

You pull down your panties and shamefully spread your pussy out for him, showing how you were already wet and ready for him to stretch you out.

"Aww, baby you're already soaked. I haven't even touched you down there yet." He said kneeling down to take a closer look. He took his hand to grip your ass and moved his thumb to swipe a line against your cunt.

You shuddered from the satisfaction of finally being touched where you were aching. You could hear shuffling from behind you and felt a sudden wet, warmth swipe up and down on your clit.

You gasped and clasped your hand over your mouth in response to Satoru suddenly eating you out. How polite of him to at least warm you up.

There was something so feral about the way he ate you out. Perhaps it was the alcohol, but he was sloppily sucking on your clit making your legs shake from the pleasure. He began humming and moaning as his tongue entered you, pumping in and out. His fingernails were digging into the fat of your ass as he spread your cheeks nice and wide for him.

Your arms wanted to give out from under you, but the bastard chose to fuck you on the cold hardwood flooring in the foyer. So you struggled to hold your head up, as if that would protect your dignity.

Satoru parted his mouth from your now slick folds, spit dripping all over your floors. "Mmm, baby I missed tasting you." He said, lust dripping from his voice almost as much as the saliva down his chin. He wiped the drool and slick from his mouth and gave your ass a swift 'SMACK'. You yelped out from the sudden sting.

"You ready baby? This is my favorite part." He cooed into your ear as he rutted his erection against your pussy.

"Yes 'Toru, fuck me please." You whined out. You were already gone, you just wanted the sweet release of the growing knot in your tummy. It was far too late to fight back at this point, all you could think about was him rearranging your guts.

He didn't need to hear any other words of confirmation as he aligned his throbbing cock with your dripping cunt. He pushed the tip in and let a shaky moan out along with a hiss.

"Fuck, always so tight." He groaned while thrusting just the tip in and out of your hole. His hands were still gripping your ass at this time, but he moved his left hand to grip onto your shoulder, lowering you onto his cock.

You let out such sweet moans and whimpers as he watched your pretty cunt swallow him up. He was mesmerized, trying not to cum at the very sight of it. He gave a drawn out sigh in relief from feeling your gummy walls clamp onto him.

He repositioned his large hands to have a strong grip on your waist as he started to thrust in and out of you. It was a slow rhythm at first, nice and sensual like he was trying to massage your insides.

It drove you insane, feeling him drag in and out. He had your back arched, so you folded your arms and laid on them. You scraped the floors with your nails as you felt him start to smack his hips against your ass.

"Mmm... fuck Satoru..." you mewled out, shoulder blades pushing together as your back curved in.

"M'gonna ruin your little pussy." He said making his thrusts rougher. "Gonna punish you for leaving me." He grunted out through clenched teeth. He let out a breathy moan as he leaned over you, slamming his hips flush against your ass.

You let out a sharp squeal as he jackhammered your cervix at this new angle. This squeal pleased him so much that he chuckled and said, "Keep making those cute little sounds."

He caged you beneath him by putting all of his weight on his left arm, holding his hand steadily on the floor by your head. He took his right arm and roughly took your arms from beneath your head. He pinned them both behind your back as he relentlessly pounded into you. This way he could have complete control over your body.

Your face was now met with the cold floor. Your cheek was squished and your mouth agape, drooling from the mind-melting ecstasy. You were starting to see stars, eyes not being able to focus on a single thing. Not that you could see through your tears anyways. You felt your climax approaching rapidly, pussy clenching him uncontrollably.

He started to curse under his breath as his thrusts became more shaky and messy from the pressure. You could tell he was nearing his orgasm too.

"Fuck baby, cum on my cock. Wanna feel you squeeze me." He said, his words coming out super slurred. You couldn't see his expression but you could tell from his voice that he was not only drunk but also pussy-drunk.

Your hands clenched from behind your back and your whole body seized up as you reached your limit. "F-fuck m'gonna cum daddy!" You screeched out, forgetting it was four in the morning. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as you gasped. Your whole body spasmed as you felt that sweet release you had been craving for months.

"Oh shit baby-" He cut himself off as he bit down on his lip. He hunched his entire body over you and his hands flew to grip onto your hips. "M'gonna fucking fill you so deep" He whimpered as he slammed your ass tightly against his pelvis. You could feel him twitch against you as that familiar warmth invades your pussy.

His curses are much louder this time around, slurring out profanities as thick ropes of cum coat your walls.

You gave one last whine before completely collapsing under him. "Satoru..." you said softly, very much out of breath.

He was silent for a second, slowly pulling himself out of your sore, leaking hole. He took his thumb and plugged your cunt so that his precious fluids stayed inside.

You squeaked from the feeling and laid on the floor in defeat. Your whole body was spent and you felt as if you could pass out on the floor.

He stood up and lifted his sweats back up. "C'mon princess lets go back to bed." He said kneeling back down to pick you up.

"I hate you, Satoru." You said meekly. You meant it, yet you didn't at the same time.

"Love you too baby." He said picking you up, bridal style.

He carried you to your bed, slipping under the covers with you. He spooned you and rested his face in the crook of your neck.

His scent was intoxicating, cologne mixed with musk and alcohol. Fuck, you really did miss him after all.

Whatever, you'll deal with kicking him out in the morning. Or not. You weren't sure anymore as you drifted back to sleep.

[soulc-hilde]

Hiiii could you do a chubby reader with like 1999-2000s em and like how the media would react to him being with a girl that's bigger than him? But basically 1999-2000s em x chubby reader? Ly <33

I hope you enjoy!!

Pairing: Eminem x plus sized! Reader

Synopsis: He was a popular yet controversial figure in the limelight. He doesn’t appeal to the glamour shots of the industry, but it’s not easy to ignore the wave of women that surround him. Of course, that’s a given after being bestowed as ‘girlfriend’, but that wasn’t what thrived your concerns.

Christina Aguilera and Eminem. Two of some of the hottest artists taking over the Y2K era have caught themselves into this ongoing cat and mouse game. Christina merely started It for the attention, the drama – though she did find him attractive, until much like any other gossip girl, her lips moved far too much and became another name to this man’s list.

Eminem, on the other hand, already had himself a lady. Granted, it started off rough after the divorce with Kim and his current girlfriend being responsible and protective of her heart, but nonetheless, he was a newly taken man by a beautiful woman. However, that was Marshall. As Eminem, by Paul’s words, he has a rep to protect and is involved with a business that thrives off of appearances and glamour rather than emotions.

Specifically, pure emotions.

Once he caught wind of Christina’s ongoing compliments toward him that slowly turned into cheap disses that not even a five-year-old would spew, he played the game. He entertained her and the media, she tried to bring in reinforcements in the form of little Britney Spears. Caught during a childish game, Spears supported her former co-worker as a woman and a friend until her father tightened the reigns and Christina was gone with the wind.

Despite the words and lyrical disses tossed between one another, no careers were destroyed over the feud. Instead, the only harm that came from this – outside of Britney realizing Christina wasn’t a good friend – was his relationship.

“Marshall, if you like her, then you like her,” you huff, marching around the kitchen as you make dinner. “There’s no need for you to drag this out or act like some pre-school boy. If you wanna go then do it before dinner’s done, so I don’t make too much.”

The dyed blond leans against the counter, shaking his head. “Baby, that’s not what’s happenin’ and it never will. Christina just talks too damn much, she started to speak on Kim an’ our divorce an’ then our relationship. She nearly put your information on blast, baby, on the fuckin’ radio!”

“And let me guess, you protected me by complimenting her figure? Standin’ on stage, calling her your reward for a damn trophy?” Your lips curled, snarling, ready to smash the half of the onion in his eyes.

He shakes his head, “that’s, that’s not what happened?” Your head snaps around, “word? As if that shit wasn’t aired? Marshall, don’t piss me off, right now.”

“Not that, I didn’t mean to say that,” he stutters, “but like, she’s a beautiful woman, just talks too much.”  You slam your hands on the other side of the counter, glaring him down. “You engaged her bullshit because she’s pretty, Marshall. She’s the new eye-candy with the picture-perfect body, you wanted her, and you thought it would slide.”

“Well, it didn’t. You’re about as subtle as a damn goldfish surrounded by Koi fish. If you want someone new, someone familiar, hell, a fuckin’ model then be my fucking guest, but don’t you dare insult my fucking intelligence.”

Distracted, you storm out of the kitchen and for the bedroom. He follows, face scrunched with confusion. “What the hell are you talkin’ about? I’m not insultin’ shit, if anyone is insulted it’s me.”

You stop at the doorway, fingernails gripping into the wooden frame to restrain the urge to just throttle the shit out of him. “What… the fuck?” You gawk at the rambling man. “Do you ever, like, listen to the words that leave your mouth or is everything impulsive?”

“You’ve insulted me multiple times as if I don’t notice shit. You did it when you sought after me when your divorce had yet to be final, you did it when Kim kept stopping by my apartment half naked and lookin’ for you, and you’re doing it now with Christina. I’m sick of the bullshit, Marshall.”

He raises his arms, exasperated, “what do you want from me? Huh?” He steps closer, “obviously, there’s somethin’ deeper on your mind. Talk to me.”

Involuntarily, a pout forms on your lips as your body shrinks into itself. You shuffle to the edge of the queen size bed, sitting down. Your face begins to sink as the wear and tear of your demons, your insecurities – the little voices in the back of your head, take over. You were no longer the raging girlfriend who’d stomp around, wave a knife or something, and end an argument with her word as law. You were the little girl who watched everyone she knew find love – the good and the bad – while she stood in the background, waiting her turn.

The same girl who no one would willingly choose, the inspiration behind the heartbreaking dares and victim of explosive, public outbursts and humiliation. All because her heart was as big as her stomach and as warm as her hugs. As that little girl grew older, taller, bigger, the shadows of the past followed her with devotion. It tainted friendships, dates, and even small social interactions. To her, eyes were always watching her. Focused on the way she talked, how many times she stuttered, how’d she walk, how’d she dress.

Her life was a show. She was the fool and people were her audience.

You and Marshall, in another world, would’ve never come into fruition. He’d be a player, yet a gentleman, eyes focused on his music, his daughter, and the skinny groupies that followed his every move. He could’ve flirted and bashed singers like Christina and Britney without worrying if his woman at home would flip out. His decisions would be based on the moment and not on the memories. Meanwhile, you’d live life in a loop, stuck in her bubble of nerves.

“Baby?” He whispers, falling to his knees in front of you, hands hover over your knees. “Talk to me.”

You begin to tremble, fingers clutching onto your lips in hopes to distract you from the pain that wished to spill. “Do you,” you breathe, “do you actually like me? Could you close your eyes and imagine me as I am, happily? Curves and all? Could you… could you look at me and know that even in a different timeline, we’d be together?”

“Where’s all this…” She cuts in with a small shake of her head, “just answer me, please. Just for tonight.”

He gulps, nodding, “yes. I do like you. When I close my eyes and think of you, every inch appears. I can’t, ugh, I can’t focus on just one feature. And – and when I do, I feel at peace. Like there’s nothing expected of me. If things were different, I don’t think we’d be together. I’d think you would meet someone far less douche than me, who thinks about you before they act recklessly.”

You break into sobs, your head shaking repeatedly. Back and forth, back and forth. “Then why… why won’t you go outside with me during the day? They already know you’re dating again, so why keep me hiding? I don’t care if, if we were spending our time at a fuckin’ park, I just want to spend time with you. Out of this goddamn apartment, staring at the same fucking walls!”

“You saw how the media weaseled its way into my marriage with Kim,” he sighs. “Granted, a lot of our problems stem from before the fame, but once the paps started showin’ up at fucking McDonalds or just, whenever I was with family, things got rough. They followed me, stalking for any source of material and stalked her, hoping to catch her in a scandalous moment.”

He looks down at his digits as they mindlessly rub at your smooth skin. “There wasn’t peace, there wasn’t privacy. I was ready to fuckin’ lose it and I did. And then,” he settles on his heels, “I met you. You never asked for a photo, an autograph, or to meet Dre or the boys. You were willing to go at my pace. It pissed me off, but you’d rather wait for the court to announce me as a single man then to just take my word for it.”

“I just want to do better for you.”

Your bottom lip trembles freely, “you don’t have to. I could never do it, no one could. I mean, fuck, look at me now. I’m still huge as fuck. I can’t go outside in a shirt and shorts; I have to be covered. I have to hide. And I don’t wanna hide anymore, Marshall. I’m sick of hiding.” The last of your words slur into cries.

His sits up, pressing your upper body onto him, holding your head against his neck. He scatters soft pecks around your ear and down your neck, whispering words of comfort to soothe you. “Then you won’t. We’ll start slow, get you comfortable with yourself. See your body, your soul, for who you really are. The reasons I love you and we’ll move on. We’ll get better.”

“I love you,” you whisper, lips brushing against the pulse point of his neck. A small smile dawns his face, “not as much as I do you.”

[ham-st4r]

𝐍𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐆𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐌𝐞 (𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨) - 𝐋. 𝐇𝐞𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐠

❥ pairing: heeseung + female reader!

♪ warnings: smut, unprotected sex, dirty talk, oral male receiving, rough make-up sex, lover's to ex's, verbal abuse, break up, cursing, crying, arguments, angst, alcohol

♪genre: smut, fluff, angst, drama, lover's to ex's

♪summary: here!

♪number of words: 13,316k

Find your way around!

Hi, hi, this is my most recent work. Nobody gets me. It’s partially based on the song by sza. I was just listening to the song, and I got inspired to write this anyways. I hope you all enjoy it. I worked hard on it, and I’m happy with the way it came out. It’s long, but I hope you’ll be patient and make your way to the end. With that being said, please leave feedback and reblog it always makes my day to see someone complimenting me on my work.

You couldn’t believe it. After all the hard work you put in, it was finally starting to pay off all the sleepless nights, the days you didn’t feel like getting up and recording or writing, all the times you’d spend cuddled up in your boyfriend’s arms crying to him cause no matter what you did, you never felt like it was good enough.

It was all finally over, and with the help of your loving boyfriend being with you every step of the way and cheering you on from the sideline, you had finally been signed by a label, and you recorded your very first single.

You and your boyfriend, heeseung of seven years, held hands as you listened to your song play on the radio for the first time since your official debut. You both sang along softly to the lyrics, and he turned to glance at you with a fond smile cherishing this beautiful moment with his most favorite person in the whole wide world.

He wiped the few tears that trickled down your face with his thumb while the last few seconds of your song played. “I’m so proud of you. I knew you’d make a hit. I never doubted you for even a second” His soft voice comes out in almost a whisper as the song comes to an end, and the soft piano fades out.

You grabbed his hand that was placed on your cheek and brought it to your lips, pressing a gentle kiss to it. “I couldn’t have done it without you,” you tell him sincerely. You can’t even remember how many times you had just thought about quitting, but he never let you cause he believed in you when Nobody else did, and he reminded you of that every single day.

He pressed the button, turning off the radio in his beater that had been getting him to point A to B for the last four years, and pulled out a green velvet box from his jacket. “And I could have never done this thing called life if it wasn’t for you” He smiled with tears gathering in his eyes. You were literally his everything since the day you met at the restaurant he worked at. He remembered the day clearly. It had been unusually busy, and order tickets were stacked. Unknowingly, he accidentally cooked your steak rare instead of medium rare once the waiter brought the food back and told him it was wrong. He felt terrible for messing it up. He took his job very seriously, so he prepared what was probably the best steak he’s ever made and specially hand delivered it to your table, apologizing over and over again before scurrying off back to the kitchen about twenty minutes later, his heart sank when the waiter called his name, he thought he had messed up another order. But he breathed a sigh of relief when he heard the words the waiter spoke. “Table number 7 said that your steak was the best she’s ever had and wanted to thank you for your hard work with a one hundred dollar tip” For the rest of the hectic night, heeseung worked hard with a smile on his face, and when he saw you come into the restaurant a week later, he knew then, and there you were the one, it was like you somehow knew he was having the worst day of his whole career and like magic, you came by and made it the best by giving him the tip of a lifetime and he just knew from that day on he needed you in his life and even though he was on the clock he made sure to get your number while sneaking you a special dessert (one that wasn’t on the menu)

You teared up once again when you saw him open the box as he held your hand from across the beat-up dash in his car. “Heeseung,” you said in absolute awe.

“Y/n, you’re my whole world, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life and to be able to call you mine. Words just aren’t enough to express how I feel about you,” he said with a shaky breath, the first tear finally rolling down his cheek. “And even though I tell you every day, I just want you to know that I love you, and I’ll never stop loving you. It’s been a really tough past couple of years for us, but I wouldn’t want to spend those years with anyone else 'cause Nobody gets me like you” His lips upturned into a small smile when he saw the surprised look on your face. "I know I'm not perfect, but I promise I'll love and take care of you until the end of time" He turned the small box showing you the ring. It wasn’t big, it wasn’t fancy, and the diamond wasn’t the size of a rock, but it was enough for you cause you knew he was proposing to you from his heart, and no ring could ever compare to the amount of love his heart held for you. “I’m so proud of you, and I’m so happy that I have someone as special as you in my life” He smiled as more tears cascaded down his pretty face. “So,” he looked at you with nothing but pure love and adoration in his eyes, and with one last shaky breath, he popped the question. “Will you marry me?”

You sat there in silence, unable to understand how you were so blessed to have your debut song played on the radio and the love of your life proposing to you all on the same day. Without a doubt, this was definitely the best day of your whole entire life, and you’d never forget it, not in a million years.

He felt his heart drop the more seconds that passed, and you didn’t say anything after a while. He took your silence as apprehension, so he tried to reassure you that he was the one for you. “I-I know your parents aren’t fond of me, and I need a new car, and I need to buy a house, bu-“You cut off his rambling and kissed him. He kissed you back immediately without any hesitation.

“Yes, yes, heeseung a million times yes!” he chuckled breathily and grabbed your shoulder across the cup holders bringing you closer as he locked lips with yours.

You pulled away, leaving just the tiniest gap between the two of you. “I want to marry you. I don’t want anybody else but you, and I don’t care what anyone thinks about you cause you’re all I’ll ever need” He leaned his forehead against yours, his warm breath tickled your nose as he distanced himself from you, and took the silver diamond embedded ring out of its little box.

His hands were shaking with nerves and excitement, and so were yours as he slipped it onto your ring finger. “I love you so much” He held your hand in his, tracing the ring with his thumb as he smiled at you.

“I love you too” You squeezed his hand and squealed in excitement.

He rolled down the window, and you looked at him in confusion cause it was literally cold and raining outside. “She wants to marry me!” He screamed proudly out the window catching the attention of the people passing by, some smiling and others giving him weird stares, but he didn’t care. He just wanted the world to know that you were his now and forever.

“Oh my god!” You giggled and cupped your hand over his mouth.

He grabbed your wrist and guided your hand to cup his cheek as he smiled widely. “My fiancée,” he leaned in to kiss you some more, and neither of you bothered rolling up the window, too lost in the moment and the softness of each other's lips to care about anything else.

Everything was going great since the release of your hit single you and heeseung finally got some free time and were now cuddled up on a small couch in your studio apartment, currently talking about your wedding and everything you should get and who to invite.

“I’m going to make sure our wedding is perfect. I promise” He kissed the crown of your head, holding you just a little bit tighter.

“We should get little mini me’s, and you’s on our cake” His chuckle filled the otherwise silent apartment, and it made your heart melt. You loved the sound of his laughter. No matter how bad of a day you had, his laugh could always make it all better.

“That would be cute,” he said as he envisioned it. He could see everything slowly coming together the more and more you both planned and talked about it.

You looked up at him and pecked his lips sweetly. “I was thinking about planning it for this summer,” he said a little reluctantly. He knew it was soon, and he didn’t want you to feel pressured, but the timing to him seemed perfect.

“Really?! I always wanted to get married in the summer since I was a little girl,” you said as you felt the excitement rising.

“Then I guess that’s settled,” he says with a smile as he plays with the ring on your finger.

You both sigh in contentment, enjoying each other’s company until the loud ringing of your phone breaks the peaceful moment.

“I’m not answering that,” you say, snuggling up closer to your fiancé and hugging him tighter, not wanting to leave his warm, comforting embrace for one second.

“But baby, that might be Steve. You’ve been waiting on him to call for a while now,” he says, knowing how badly you’ve been wanting to get an opening gig, and this phone call might just be you finally getting that chance.

It’s a good thing you had heeseung cause he was always the logical one out of the both of you.

He moved his hands off of you, allowing you to take the call. “I’ll be waiting” He smiles at you softly.

You finally get up to answer it, and he was right. It was your manager, Steve, and as exciting as the news was, you couldn’t have gotten it at a worse time.

You hang up and trudge back over to heeseung, who was patting his lap with a tired smile on his face. “Was it him?” He asks excitedly as he wraps you back in his arms again.

“Yes,” you mumble into his chest.

“I take it the news wasn’t any good…” he muttered with a sad tone.

“The news was great” He leaned back and looked at you, confused.

“Then why the sad face?” He asks while stroking your cheek.

“I got invited on tour to open up for a well-known group, and they said I’d gain a lot of experience and a bigger audience.” You explained.

“What?! Baby, that’s great news! I’m so happy for you!” you knew he’d be excited for only a moment before you broke the terrible news to him.

“It’s a summer tour, and it’s this year, and we were going to have our wedding in the summer this year….” You said sadly, and you watched his smile lessen until it was nothing but a frown.

“Oh….not great” It was silent for a few minutes before he was being the heeseung you knew, always trying to turn a bad situation into a good one no matter how terrible the circumstances were. “Look at me, love. I’m not going anywhere, okay? We can have the wedding next year” He cupped your cheeks and made you look at him, smiling at the little pout on your lips. “And besides, this is your career we’re talking about. Sure, I would love to call you my wife and be your husband, but you know what, I would love just as much?” He asked with a smile.

“What?” He squished your cheeks and kissed your pout away, replacing it with a smile.

“To see my fiancée living her dream and performing in front of millions of people after knowing what it took to get here, seeing you perform for the first time on stage, will be the happiest day of my life.”

Tears had welled in your eyes, and not a day went by where you weren’t grateful for him. He always knew just what to say to make you feel better.

He was literally perfect.

He wiped your tears before they got halfway down your cheeks. “No more crying in the studio,” he said as his voice cracked slightly. “We’ve done enough of that already” He released a heavy breath while hugging you tightly in his arms.

“Yeah, okay,” you whispered and smiled past your tears. “I love you so much I don’t know what I’d ever do without you.”

“I love you too, and don’t even think about it cause you’ll never be without me.”

You held each other in silence, enjoying the rest of the time you had left until the tour started.

You had been preparing everything for your upcoming shows rehearsing over and over again to make sure everything was perfect. After all, this was your first time performing on stage, and it had to be nothing but the best, no less.

“Baby, you’re going to do so good,” Heeseung startled you. He had been watching you from afar after quietly entering the studio with the spare key that you had made for him on your one-year anniversary. He had just got off of work and came to the studio after cooking you both dinner before he left the restaurant.

“Hee!” You squeal, taking off your headphones and running over to him, peppering his face with kisses.

“Hello to you too, baby,” he chuckled and set his bags down before picking you up and kissing you as you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist. “You miss me?” He said on your lips, teasingly swiping his tongue along them.

“I always miss you,” you whined into the kiss, and his hands moved down to your butt, squeezing it as he groaned from the feeling of your plump lips pressing against his.

After a hard day of work, feeling your lips on his was nothing short of heaven.

“Me too,” he released a breath and opened his mouth, letting your tongue explore every inch of him, but before you two got too carried away, he broke the kiss and set you back down after pecking your lips one last time. “I made us dinner,” he smiles, and you can see the exhaustion all over his features even though he tried his best to hide it, but nothing could get past you. You’ve known him for 8 years. “It’s been a while since you left the studio, and we had a date, so…” he let go of your waist and picked up the bags he brought, pulling out a bottle of your favorite wine.

 “I took it upon myself to bring the date to you” He wiggled his eyebrows with a goofy smile.

“What did I do to deserve you?” You hugged him by his waist.

He set the bottle down and copied your action. “Oh, I don’t know,” he pretended to think. “But if I had to say, it’s probably because you’re the best person to ever walk this planet, and you deserve nothing but the best.”

You couldn’t believe it even after years. He could still make you feel butterflies with his effortless compliments.

“I love you so much. Did you know that?” You ask, playing with his little cravat.

“I do, but If I didn’t, I know you’d just remind me every day anyway” He pecked your forehead. “I hope you’re in the mood for steak,” he says.

“I’m always in the mood for steak,” you smile brightly. That was the first meal you both shared on your first date together. Of course, you’d always be in the mood for steak cause it always took you back to that wonderful day.

“That’s my girl. Now go sit your pretty butt down while I get your dinner.”

“No, I’ll do it.” You insist. “You just go sit and rest, okay?” You could see he was hesitant at first, but he quickly gave in cause his feet were killing him, and he was more than exhausted from picking up extra hours.

“Fine, but just this one time” He took his chef jacket off and hung it up at the door.

“That’s my boy,” you say, mimicking his words from earlier with a smile. As soon as he turned around, you took the opportunity to pat him on his butt.

“Y/n!” He squeaked and spun around, looking at you in shock. You’d never done that before. “What was that?” He asked, and you could see him blushing.

You just shrugged with a smile, and you would definitely be doing that a lot more from now on to see his cute little reaction.

During dinner, you both chatted about your jobs and how he’d been working late shifts and taking extra days.

No wonder he looked so tired, you thought.

You guys weren’t together as often as before with all the preparations you were doing for your tour. You didn’t get to keep up with the happenings, so when you did get together, the last thing you wanted was to talk about work, but luckily tonight, you both had the night to yourselves to talk about any and everything. “You should take a break, babe” He shakes his head slightly, dismissing your comment drinking the last bit of wine from his glass.

“I can’t. With the wedding coming, I need as much as I can get, you know that baby, plus I still need to save for a new car,” you just sighed.

“Hee, I make enough money for the both of us now we can live comfortably, so why do you insist on working?”

“Cause it shouldn’t be that way!” He raised his voice in frustration, not with you but with himself. “I’m supposed to take care of you, and I can barely take care of myself. Your parents even said it I’m a deadbeat that's no good for you, so to change that, I have to show them that I can provide for you that I can provide for us.”

As soon as he said that, you knew this was about way more than just making money, and he was dealing with more than he was letting on.

You pushed the empty plates aside and sat next to him on the couch, looking at his apologetic face. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to yell, okay baby? I’m just a little stressed. Lately, that’s all” He put his hand on your knee, squeezing it softly. “I won’t do it again,” he promised.

“I know, it’s okay, hee” You rubbed his back soothingly, and he closed his eyes, exhaling a deep breath. “Lay back” He looked at you confused, but when he saw you weren’t saying anything else, he laid back slowly with his head on the armrest of the sofa. “Feet up” He did as you said and placed his feet on your lap, but he was still skeptical of your motive. “Just close your eyes and relax,” and he did, too tired to question your intentions anymore.

A low hum settled in his chest as you slowly massaged his feet, rubbing the balls of each calloused foot.

You gently pinched his heel and rubbed it up and down, adding slight pressure to soothe away any aches and pains. “That feels….” He trailed off, not being able to find the right word to describe how good it felt. You chuckled lightly and continued massaging him.

Your hands trailed up to his long legs, rubbing the taut muscles of his calves.

He felt shivers all over his body from your gentle, loving touch.

You moved to his thighs as you felt them tensing under your palms. “That feels good,” he breathes out, and you smile as a warm feeling spreads across your chest as you watch him start to relax the more you caress his tired aching body.

“Turn over for me” He quickly flipped over and rested his cheek on the backs of his hands, waiting on your next move.

You put your hands under his shirt, gliding your fingers all over his back. “I know that you’re stressed, and I know you’re dealing with more than you’re telling me” He tensed up when you said that, and you sighed. “I just want you to know no matter what, I’m here for you, so don’t stress yourself out too much, okay?” you could instantly feel him loosening up again from your reassuring words, and it warmed your heart that you could be of assistance to him when he was feeling low.

“Okay, thank you, love,” he whispered, and that’s all you needed to hear from him right now. You were going to let him open up to you when he was ready.

“You have so many knots” He chuckled loudly at that but winced when you pressed down a little too roughly to massage them out. “Sorry,” you said in a tiny voice.

“I think since you hurt me, you should make it better” You rolled your eyes playfully even though he couldn’t see you. You lifted up his shirt and leaned down, placing a few kisses there as his breath hitched in his throat.

“Better?” You asked.

“Much better” He squeezed onto the cushion under him, eyes rolling back in his head, and he might have been enjoying this a little too much as he felt himself getting more and more turned on by the second.

After successfully working out the knots in his back, you told him to roll over on his back once more. “Ooh, what’s next?” He said giddily.

“I’m glad you asked,” you smirked. “Take off all your clothes now,” you said sternly, and the look on his face was completely priceless as he was trying to register what you had just said.

“What? W-why?” He laughed awkwardly and avoided eye contact with you. “I mean, a-are you sure? I haven’t even had the chance to showe-“

“Less questions, more doing” He stood up and quickly got rid of his shirt and pulled down his zip before dropping his pants.

“Those too,” you said after looking at his cute, questioning face.

“Okay,” he whispered and took a deep breath feeling overwhelmed by your sudden boldness as he freed himself from the tightness of his boxers, his dick standing up right away from how hard he had already gotten.

You bit your lip at the sight of him. Even after eight years, he still managed to amaze you in every single way.

He laid back down on the sofa as you sat between his legs, gulping loudly while watching you run your fingers over his tense abs.

He put his hands behind his head, biting on his lip softly when you kissed his thighs, and somehow, just that little bit was enough to make him impatient.

“Baby… I’m really sorry, but I don’t think I can wait” His dick twitched at the same time the words left his mouth. As much as he wanted to see what else you had in store for him, he’d have to find out another time cause, right now. He couldn’t wait to feel your mouth around him.

“Don’t apologize, baby, just relax tonight is all about you” You kissed his tip, a string of clear precum creating a connection between your lips and his pinkish tip.

You licked his warm shaft running your tongue along the protruding veins. “Shit baby, you always know how to make me feel so good” His stomach was tensing with every wet lick and swirl of your warm tongue.

Wordlessly you locked eyes with him and took half of him in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down slowly.

“Oh fuck” he whined, eyes rolling back in his head immediately. It had been a while since you and him both got to spend intimate time together and just being like this with you after so long was like a dream come true.

He really missed this. He missed the feeling of your loving touch, and he missed being able to hold you and kiss you and tell you how much you mean to him in the privacy of your bedroom.

You used your other hand to stroke what couldn’t fit down your throat, and his moans increased in volume as he impatiently bucked his hips up, gagging you when he did so. “Sorry, it just feels so g-good,” he moaned, chest heaving up and down as he opened his eyes and stared down at you sucking him nearly all the way in while your hand made its way to his balls, cupping them gently just the way you knew he liked. “That’s it, love, just like that.”

You hummed around his shaft as he slid further down your throat till your lips were stretched around his thick base.

He moved his hand from behind his head, stroking your cheek lightly, before placing it on the back of your head, not to guide you but just so he could feel closer to you. “I’m so close,” he whispers shakily while feeling his tip hitting the back of your throat as you hallowed your cheeks.

Seconds later, you could feel his warm liquid invading your mouth and trickling down your throat. You kept your head still as he bucked his hips up and unknowingly gagged you again, causing you to tighten up around him. “Fuck baby,” he releases a low growl as you feel the rhythmic pulsating of his cock on your tongue.

You sucked him through his high, careful not to hurt him, knowing how sensitive he always was after cumming.

He watched you pull off of him as he caught his breath. He cupped your cheek with his palm and wiped the remaining cum off the corner of your lips with his thumb. “That was wonderful,” he chuckled breathlessly.

You smiled at him and leaned down again, kissing his abdomen to his stomach and all the way to his sweaty chest, stopping and swirling your tongue around his perky nipple while your free hand flicked the other hardened nub.

His little whimpers turned you on like crazy, but you ignored your pleasure cause right now, everything was about him and him only, and besides, his pleasure was your pleasure anyways.

He clutched onto your shirt tightly as you switched to his other nipple pulling it between your lips gently.

You could feel him arching up into you as he hugged you tightly to his body. “Y/n fuck, I need to feel you now,” he cried out, and you knew when he said it like that, he meant right this instant.

“I’m all yours,” that’s all he needed to hear, and then he was leaning up and taking you in his arms to the shower as you sucked and kissed all over his beautiful neck.

After your intimate time in the shower, he ran a bath for you both.

He was lying in the tub with hazy eyes, slowly stroking your shoulders and drawing random shapes on your skin, occasionally covering you with the suds from the bubbles he added.

“I’m serious, you know?” You brought up the conversation from earlier, and you heard him sighing behind you as you clasped your hand with his. “Just think about it for me, please?” You scooted closer to him, and he held your waist with his other hand.

“What exactly are you asking me to do, baby?” he kissed your neck sensually, and you tilted your head to the side, giving him access to nibble and gently bite your skin.

“I’m asking you to quit,” you put it simply as you reached your hand behind you and pulled him closer by his neck as he sucked even more hickeys on your skin.

“You know I can’t do that,” he mumbled, too occupied with kissing you to respond with a longer explanation.

“You can and you will. I can’t stand seeing you so tired, hee, you know that”

“I know, I know” He moved his head next to yours and spoke lowly into your ear. “Okay,” he caved in, but he knew you were right. He could work for ten years straight for seven days a week, but if he stayed at that dead-end restaurant, it still wouldn’t be enough to give you the life he wants you and him to have.

“Don’t worry about a thing. I have us, okay?” You reassured him, and it would be hard for him to accept that for a while but with you, he knew everything would be okay.

“Okay,” he nibbled on your ear lobe, using the tip of his tongue to lick the shell of your ear. “Well, since I’m now jobless, I think I have an idea of what to do with all this free time.”

“Yeah? Tell me all about it.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll tell you everything when we get to the bedroom.”

You chuckled, blushing at his little insinuation. You knew neither of you would be getting any sleep tonight.

“Morning, my love,” heeseung whispered in the quietness of your bedroom.

“Morning,” you greeted him back groggily with your morning voice.

“Last night was great” His smile reached the corner of his eyes, creating those little wrinkles on his face that you loved so much.

“It really was” You brushed some hair out of his eyes and stroked his cheek.

“What are your plans for today, Hmm?”

“Recording, recording, and more recording,” you sighed.

“Right,” he frowned. He wasn’t taking this time apart well at all, you were literally his everything, and without you, he couldn’t help but feel like a piece of him was missing. “Don’t worry too much, alright?” he kissed the hand that was resting on his cheek still. “I heard you last night. It was beautiful” He kissed your forehead sweetly.

“Really?” You asked with puppy eyes.

“Really” He smiled but frowned when you got out of bed.

Your eyes had landed on the clock, and you were almost late for your studio session today. “On no, I’m gonna be late” You rushed out of bed and messily grabbed some clothes.

“I can drive you,” heeseung offered, about to stand up, but you pushed his chest so he could lie back down.

“I’m gonna be gone till midnight. My schedule is completely packed. You just rest till I get back, okay?” you kissed him when he tried to protest, and he just flopped back down on the pillows.

You quickly did your hair and freshened up in the bathroom. “Bye, babe,” you said before bolting out of the door, not even giving him a chance to say it back.

“Bye, I love you,” he mutters to himself. “What am I gonna do now?”

Heeseung did absolutely nothing all day but sleep until he felt the bed dip down as you wrapped your arms around his waist.

The clock read 2:17 am, and his heart ached for you as he hugged your tired body closer to his chest. “Goodnight, love,” he whispered to you.

“Night, hee,” that’s all you could say before you both fell fast asleep.

Things went like this for the next couple of months, you coming home late, and heeseung was left at the apartment alone, and lately, the tension between you and heeseung grew over just the littlest things. You both had been exhausted him emotionally while you physically, and when he took it upon himself to clean your desk in the studio cause he was bored, that just opened the door for an argument to ensue. Although that was far from his intention, he just figured instead of being lazy while you were out winning the bread, he could at least surprise you with a tidied up workspace.

But apparently, that wasn’t as good of an idea as he originally thought.

“I don’t understand why you would even touch it,” you say, annoyed you had come back early from rehearsals, and nothing was the way you had left it, and now you couldn’t find your lyric sheets. “Can you do anything right?” You said irritatedly.

“Love, I’m sorry I just wanted to do something nice for you, that’s all,” he mumbled, feeling guilty that he messed up your things. “I put it in the top drawer with the rest” He could have sworn he did.

“If you want to do something nice for me, you can get out of my sight. I leave soon, and now I won’t have time to pack or practice cause you had to do something stupid,” you snapped.

“I can pack for you,” heeseung offered.

“Don’t bother. You’ll probably just mess up something else.” You angrily leafed through all the scattered papers. “Useless,” you mumbled, but he heard it loud and clear.

That was it. He wasn’t going to stand for your behavior anymore. It’s fine if you’re irritated. He understood that, but he wasn’t going to allow you to disrespect him. 

“Stop!” He raised his voice at you, and you flinched. He took long strides over to your desk and pinned you against it with his large frame pressing your back into the knobs on the drawers that dug into your flesh as he stared down at you, and his heavy breath fanned across your face. “Don’t talk to me like that ever again.”

You stood still, heart beating rapidly in your chest. “I-I’m sor,” you muttered with fear in your eyes, and his expression softened a bit, but he still remained stern.

“I put those fucking sheets together. It was you that moved them” He pressed his lips onto yours, roughly taking your breath away from his hard tone yet soft touch.

He separated from you momentarily and stripped your shirt off, leaving your top half fully exposed from your lack of a bra. He squeezed your breasts roughly, and you moaned into his mouth as his tongue swirled with yours.

You moved your hands from the desk pulling his shirt up, and he smirked into the kiss, moving back so you could pull his shirt off, leaving his dark hair messy atop his head. “Hee,” you whimper.

“Be quiet” He pushed you roughly into the desk, rutting his hardened bulge against you. “I’m gonna get rid of this bitchy attitude of yours” Never ever has he talked to you like that before, and for some reason, you kind of like this new side of him. The thought of him putting you in your place excited you.

He stuck his hand in your shorts, palming over your mound and grazing your clit with his palm.

You threw your head back and moaned loudly as he zeroed in on your neck, leaving sloppy wet kisses behind your ear, decorating your neck in red marks that would be a deep purple by tomorrow.

He took his hand outside of your shorts and pulled them down around your ankles. He kissed you as best as he could while he pulled his pants and underwear down, the jean material pooling at his feet. “Turn around,” he ordered and shoved your face against your stupid work desk. “If you’re gonna apologize, you better do it right,” he smacked your ass harshly. “Say it!” another loud smack bounced off the walls in the small studio. “Why so quiet now, hmm? Just a moment ago, you weren’t shy to call me useless” He stuck his fingers in your wet cunt without warning, pumping them in you roughly.

“Fuck!” Your legs were already shaking as you tried to hold yourself up by placing your hands flat on your desk. The brutal pace of his fingers was mind-numbing as you helplessly clamped down around his digits.

“Cause you know I didn’t fuck up your stupid little lyric sheets, is that it?” He slapped your ass again, completely unforgiving with the strength of his harsh smacks.

Now that he mentioned it, you did remember seeing them earlier, but you don’t know where you put them, and you were too full of yourself to admit it. “I don’t k-know,” you lied.

“Sure? Cause I think you do” He slowed the pace of his fingers gradually until he came to a sudden pause. “If not, then I guess I was wrong” He smirked behind you, pulling out his fingers that were sticky with your essence and sucking on them greedily.

You were still bent over, clenching around nothing and trying to back your ass up to feel him and have him touch you in any way, but he didn’t.

“Guess I don’t need to fuck the attitude out of you after all,” you heard his belt rustling behind you, indicating that he was going to pull his pants back up and leave you bent over, unsatisfied and still aching for his cock.

“No! Please, I’m sorry it was me I-I moved them,” you admitted embarrassingly. “I’m sorry.” You whimpered.

He turned you over and lifted you on top of your desk, messing up everything he had just cleaned and organized. “Say it like you mean it” He stared down at you smirking at how needy and desperate you looked as you spread your legs wide open just for him.

He rubbed his leaking tip between your legs, coating himself in your wetness as you held onto his waist for support.

You kept your lips sealed, but after a minute of his heavy cock gliding across your pussy and teasing your clit with his wet tip, you couldn’t take it anymore. You needed to feel him.

You were going to apologize again, but thankfully he had mercy on you and pushed it inside, stretching you out with his big tip.

However, he didn’t have mercy on you like you once thought cause he stayed still after that, not moving even an inch.

“Please, hee, I’m so sorry. I’ll never say anything like that again,” you begged with tears almost in your eyes.

“I know you won’t” He pushed in all the way without warning, splitting your pussy open on his dick as he nestled deep inside you. “I’m gonna make sure of that” He put his hand on your throat, choking you lightly as he slammed into you, his hips colliding with your thighs as fast clapping noises filled up your studio. “The only thing you’re gonna be saying when I’m done with you is my name,” he grunted loudly while plowing into you ruthlessly, not bothering to even let you adjust properly.

“Heeseung,” you choked, barely able to speak from his grip on your throat and the brutal pace of his hips as your walls squeezed around his dick. “Fuck” you moan.

“Not so useless now, am I? I feel your little pussy sucking me right in.” His hips stuttered a bit, feeling you clench on him even tighter from the filthy words he spoke to you. “Open up that dirty little mouth” You did as he said, opening your mouth wide for him.

He spat in your mouth while fucking into you faster. Your fucked out state was making him go completely animalistic the longer you stared at him, and you were unable to speak cause how good he was doing you. Finally, after months, you were finally paying attention to him and only him in this shitty little studio of yours.

His swollen balls smacked against your ass. You spread your legs wider trying to feel every inch of him even though he was already buried to the hilt inside you and kissing your cervix repeatedly with his tip. “Nothing to say now, huh?” He teased, loving how you looked at him with your watery eyes, mouth full of his spit as you let him take you raw on your precious work desk.

He moved his hand from your neck, and his saliva trickled down your throat. You swallowed every last drop of it, eyes rolling back when his hips snapped into you, roughly jerking you back and forth on the desk.

You choked out his name as best as you could but stopped halfway when he rubbed your sensitive bud that was pulsating and desperately in need of his attention.

“Gonna cum already?” He chuckled and bit his lip, eyebrows clashing together as he slid in and out of you. “So much for me not being able to do anything right” His eyes flickered down to your breasts that were sloshing from his vigorous pace, and just the sight and the sound of your squelching pussy each time he rammed into was enough to have him mere seconds away from coming.

“Yes, hee,” you dug your nails into his waist while biting your lip. “I’m so close.”

He winced from the slight pain, but that only brought him more pleasure. “Cum on my cock, baby,” he circled your clit with his thumb, sending you to your breaking point as you came around his cock with silent cries of his name. “oh fuck!” He moaned loudly as he came from the tightness of your pussy clenching around him so deliciously, filling your insides with his warm cum.

He leaned down, locking his lips with yours, tiredly thrusting inside you as he finished at the same time with you.

He touched his sweaty forehead with yours breathing heavily as his legs began to feel numb.

You cupped his cheek and brought him in for a short but passion-filled kiss. “I’m sorry, hee,” you apologized again for lashing out at him. You truly felt bad. “It was all my faul-“

“Shhh, don’t worry, love. I understand. Let’s just forget about it and get you cleaned up. You had a long day” He pulled out and picked you up off your desk, as multiple sheets fell off of it. It was the ones you were searching so frantically for. “I’ll pretend I didn’t just see that,” he chuckled, and you hid in his chest.

“Thank you,” you muttered shyly as he walked you to the bathroom.

“Are you okay?” He asked once you got in the shower and cleaned you gently with his hands. “I didn’t hurt you anywhere, did I?” He looked at you with worry in his eyes. He knew he had gone rougher than usual due to his own frustrations at the time.

“No baby, you could never hurt me,” you assure him.

“Okay,” he whispers and kisses you slowly as he trails his hands up your sides, and you wrap your arms around his neck.”

“I love you, hee” You rested your head on his chest, listening to his calming heartbeat as the warm water from the shower cascaded down your bodies.

“Of course you love me,” he giggled, and you smiled. “I’m still going to pack for you, too” You tried to protest, but he just pushed his index finger to your lips. “And I love you too” He hugged you close and cherished what time was left before you had to go on the road.

Unfortunately, as easy as it was to make up after your first couple of fights with mind-blowing sex, now it just wasn’t that simple.

Especially after your schedule kept getting packed as the tour date was approaching, and now you had no time to talk things out cause you were too busy either working or sleeping.

And luck wasn’t on your side today either, as you and heeseung were in your tenth fight this week.

“All I’m saying is that I miss spending time with you. I don’t even get to see you anymore. You’re gone when I wake up. You don’t call or reply to my messages” He rubbed his temple in frustration. “I mean, I wake up at three in the morning to an empty bed, and you can’t even at least answer my calls. I’m just worried about you, baby, that’s all” He tried to hold you, but you didn’t have time for that. There were only a few hours left before you had to go, and here he was, trying to patch things up before you went away for a whole three months, and you just didn’t have the time for him right now.

“I work late, and you know that. I don’t see why you can’t just leave me alone. I have to put my phone on mute 'cause you just won’t stop texting me” You were haphazardly throwing some extra stuff into a suitcase.

“Well, If you’d just answer, I wouldn’t have to keep texting,” he scoffed. “Didn’t know it was a crime to fucking miss my fiancée.”

“How can you miss me when I see you every day?” you argued.

“Yeah! And that’s it, you just see me, you don’t pay attention to me. We haven’t talked in weeks. I only see you running out in the morning. It’s been months since we’ve touched and made love, and I miss you so fucking much. You don’t understand. It’s always so quiet and lonely when you’re not here” He lowers his head and picks at his nails nervously. He hated having these arguments, and he hated that he was having them with you the most.

“You knew this was what you were signing up for” You didn’t know what came over you to treat him so roughly, but he was just wearing you out lately. You had more important things to focus on, and him whining like a baby wasn’t on that list. “I can’t babysit you all the time. Maybe if you did something other than sit home all day and wait for me, you might not feel so lonely,” you spat without even looking at him, completely missing the hurt look that took over his features.

“You’re the one who told me to quit my job, and as soon as I did, you just disappeared from life and acted like you don’t even know me,” he answers with anger laced in his voice. He couldn’t believe the audacity of your words. Him quitting his job was literally your idea.

You sighed. You didn’t have any more time for his nonsense right now. “Well, I don’t care anymore. Go get a job, fly a kite for all I care” You had no idea that you were crushing him to pieces right now, too busy wrapped up in your own world that you forgot he was the reason why you were even here in the first place. “My parents were right about you. You are a deadbeat” You laughed pathetically, letting the stress of the situation go straight to your head and saying any rude thing that came to mind.

You somehow felt like it was justified for you to say such things cause right now, he was the one being hard-headed, not you. He knew you had more things to worry about right now, and he just wasn’t one of them. “I know what it is. You’re just trying to hold me back. I’m this close to my dream, and you just don’t want to see me happy.”

“What the fuck are you even on about?” He did his best to stop his voice from cracking. “I was with you every step of the way. I was there for you when no one else was. I gave you my all 'cause that’s what you deserved, I wanted you to succeed more than anyone else, and you know that” He paused for a moment to compose himself. “But now I’m not so sure anymore” The first tear rolled down his cheek, and he hated it. He hated the fact that, for the first time, he was crying alone. You were no longer sharing pain together now. You were the ones causing it for each other. “I literally fucking proposed to you 'cause I love you. I never would do anything to hurt you or our future.”

“Ha! Love? I’m sure you just were trying to tie yourself to me and use me for my fame.” Little did you know it was you who let the fame get to you. You allowed yourself to feel higher and more important than anyone else, including your own fiancé.

He let out a shocked gasp at your words. For the first time in his life, he was left speechless.

For the first time, he didn’t recognize you as the girl who gave him his first and only hundred-dollar tip.

He saw you as someone who lost their way along the road and forgot where they came from.

This wasn’t the y/n he fell in love with.

As devastating as it was for him, he just couldn’t see you two getting over this. It had been months since you started treating him this way, and It was just too high of a mountain to climb, no matter how much he wanted to be there for you. You just weren’t letting him, nor were you there for him. The last months have been nearly insufferable. He had no idea how much your career would impact the relationship, but the last week has shown him that your job was more important than him, and if he wasn’t your number one anymore, what was the point of all this fighting and suffering just to call you his fiancée?

It wasn’t worth it. Not anymore. It wasn’t.

He couldn’t do this anymore for the first time in the eight years he’s known you. He put himself first. “Since work is more important than us, you can have fun with your new relationship,” he mumbled as his voice finally broke while slipping the ring you got him off his ring finger and setting it in front of you on your desk. “Hopefully, your career can give you more than I ever could,” he turned away, leaving you speechless.

Why couldn’t he just see that you had a life to live? Why couldn’t he just understand your point of view? You thought.

He went to your bedroom and gathered up his stuff quickly. You watched him walk out the front door without looking back, and it was only after he shut the door did you regret everything that had just happened.

The silence crept up on you slowly but surely, and you were still in shock that he was actually gone eight years down the drain in the blink of an eye.

But it was too late now.

You said things that couldn’t be taken back, and even if you apologized, you’re not even sure that would erase all the horrible things you’ve said and done to him in these past months.

You wanted to forget everything and run after him so he could take you back into his arms, but you were scared to, so you foolishly let him go.

Cause If you were him, you wouldn’t take yourself back.

It had already been a year since your tour, and your career had skyrocketed beyond what anyone could have ever expected.

Except for one person.

Heeseung.

He always believed you could do anything. “I was there for you when no one else was” Those words rang in your ears over and over again as tears rolled down your cheeks. You looked down at the city view from your penthouse. “Fuck!” You screamed into the night sky, slamming your empty wine glass on the cold cement.

You tried to forget him, but every time you did anything, he took up every little crevice of your brain, and no matter what, you couldn’t escape him.

Even when you went on dates to try to get over him all you could think of was him, and the late nights he came to the studio bringing the date night to you (as he called it) with his very own cooked steak and your favorite wine.

The one relationship you were in after him (if you could even call it that) was a complete total disaster, and you were stuck dealing with a deadbeat. All he did was complain and tear you down. Criticizing your every move, He never gave you any support, and he was only interested in how much money your next show would net so he could bum off you.

He wasn’t even half the man heeseung was when he was with you.

You stayed with him for months cause you felt like that’s all you deserved, but after you found out that he cheated on you, you quickly broke things off with him.

Not cause you actually were hurt, or you cared about him, but you refused to associate yourself with a person like that.

You sighed at the memory.

Since that train wreck, you looked countless men in the face and turned them down every single last one cause no matter what, you could never get over him. Every time you looked at a man, you could still only ever see heeseung’s face.

All you could think of was heeseung 24/7, and no matter what, he always treated you with the utmost respect. You didn’t always agree with things, and you both had your fights here and there, but he was the first one to apologize and talk things over, always willing to understand your side no matter what.

You missed him so bad you cried yourself to sleep countless nights thinking of what you could have been if you hadn’t been so careless with your words and so dismissive of his feelings. If you could go back in time, you would reverse everything. You wouldn’t even think twice about it.

You couldn’t help but daydream about him coming to your concerts and being your number-one fan, and celebrating your first show together with you. You just know that he would have been so happy for you, and those would have been the best moments of your career, without a doubt.

But if you were being real, you deserved less. He should’ve never been the first one to apologize for all the times you fought. He should have never been made to feel like less cause you put your career over him cause he definitely wasn’t. He was worth more than any career in the whole entire world.

But now, all you could do was hang on to the little bit that was left of him.

You took his engagement band with you everywhere, and you never took yours off except for during interviews, so you wouldn’t raise any questions. You know you should have, but you just wanted to keep everything that made you hold onto the memories of when you two were together and happy.

Some nights, you just wanted to call him and tell him you wanted him back and you didn’t want to see him with anyone else but you, that no one else made you feel the way he did, as selfish as it was, you just wanted to tell him you wanted him to be yours again.

Cause no matter how hard you try. You just couldn’t let him go.

As you stared at the empty bottle of your favorite wine on your nightstand, even that reminded you of him, and like every night since your break up, you cried yourself to sleep.

Heeseung was back at his old restaurant job. Luckily for him, he left on good terms with everyone, and they were happy to have him back cause he was by far the best cook and worker there.

He was currently cooking and serving up dishes, frantically rereading order tickets to make sure he got all the orders correct.

It was only when he hit the bell and yelled, “Order for table fifteen,” that he heard an oh-so-familiar voice. He looked up at one of the TVs in the top left corner of the restaurant, and he was captivated by who he saw.

After a year, he remembers all the lyrics to that song, and he remembers reciting them to you a few weeks before your tour. That was one of his favorites from you.

Heck, all your songs were his favorite.

It was one of the first songs you had ever written. It was about how you two first met.

He couldn’t help but smile as he watched you live your dream. As much as you hurt him, he still just couldn’t forget about you. He tried to go out a little and find someone new, not to replace you but to move on, but that quickly came to an end when every time he even looked at a girl, all he saw was your pretty face.

Yeah, you said some really terrible things, but he knew deep down you didn’t mean that it was just a hard time for you both, but he knew things wouldn’t have worked. That’s why he didn’t go running back to you after all this time apart. He had done some thinking, and though he couldn’t see it right away, he knew your guy's breakup was inevitable.

Apart of him wishes, he didn’t walk out on you that day, but what would have changed? You were too busy for him. There was no longer a slot for him in your busy schedule anymore. He chalked it up to the right people wrong time.

Call him whipped. He didn’t care cause no matter what, you’d always be his girl, and he’d always be your number-one fanboy.

He sang along as he watched you fondly on the TV. He knew you had what it took to get where you are today. A doubt never crossed his mind when he first saw you perform. He knew you were made for it.

As you held the last note of the song, he held his breath, not blinking even once so he could capture this beautiful moment and store it in his heart forever. What could he say? He was a very sentimental guy.

Unknowingly he clapped for you while all his other co-workers were bumping into him and shouting his name so he could get back to work. 

“That’s my girl” He smiled proudly as the camera panned back and showed thousands of people in the crowd supporting you.

“In your dreams, kid, now stop daydreaming about a girl that doesn’t even know you exist. I need five more steaks, medium rare” His boss patted his shoulder lightly.

“Yes, chef!” Heeseung answered while wiping his hands on his towel before preparing fresh steaks for all the waiting customers. “If only he knew,” heeseung whispered and smiled to himself.

And if only he had of looked up for just a second, he would have noticed the camera do a close-up of your face and give him a clear view of his engagement band hanging off the dainty chain that you wore around your neck every performance.

As much as heeseung wanted to ignore it, he couldn’t. The billboards were literally everywhere, and he’s not sure if he was zeroed in on them just because it was you or if it was that you were really just that popular that your world tour was marketed on literally everything.

Though it didn’t much matter anyways cause he still saw it, and he had already purchased a front-row ticket to see you live in his city, one that he may have bought on resell, and he also may have spent his months' savings to get it.

He wasn’t stalking you, but he knew you had moved out some time ago after randomly hearing people chatting about you, and he might have watched a couple of your interviews from time to time just to see how you were doing.

Sadly, you never mentioned him in any of them, but why would you? You both literally broke things off a year ago. You probably didn’t even think about him anymore, or maybe you did, but he couldn’t really say.

Of course, he thought of calling though he wasn’t sure why exactly but whenever he did he reached the dial tone it didn’t come as a shock he knew when you moved you changed your number too, but it didn’t stop him from ringing a few times maybe it was just out of habit.

The idea of seeing you after all this time made him extremely nervous, but he just needed to see you one last time in person just to get the last little bit of closure his heart yearned for after missing you for a whole year.

Your nerves were going absolutely crazy. You were about to take the stage in five, and no matter how many shows you had done, this one definitely meant the most to you cause it was in your hometown. It was where everything began.

More importantly, it was where you and your favorite person met and got engaged.

You grabbed his ring, bringing it to your lips and kissing the silver band softly.

You thought back to everything that happened, and you knew no matter how things ended, heeseung was somewhere, and he was proud of you.

That’s just the type of guy he was, never one to harbor any malice in his heart. He was the true definition of an angel.

“On in two,” You heard in the background of your thoughts, and with that, you wiped your tears before straightening out your clothing and taking a deep breath.

“You’re gonna do great,” you muttered to yourself.

That’s what heeseung would have said if he was here right now and if you didn’t have that knowledge, you’re sure you wouldn’t have been able to take the stage.

You looked at the crowd from behind the curtain, and your heart sank even further. As shallow as it sounds and as dramatic as you were being, you couldn’t help but think this is what you traded heeseung for. This is what you gave up the love of your life for.

As you were lost in the thought, the final minutes passed, and before you knew it, you were going up on stage as the crowd roared for you.

Heeseung had been pacing back and forth on his lunch break. Today was the day of your concert, and he was chickening out. He got called into work today on his day off and deemed that to be more important than seeing you.

That’s what he tried to convince himself of, but he knew it was just him being a scaredy cat.

Your concert must have been on for at least an hour, and he had to drive at least half an hour to get to the venue.

Without thinking or notifying any of his co-workers, he got in his same little beater and sped off to the venue as fast as possible.

He may have been honked at, and he may have honked back, but after running at least two red lights and changing lanes without his signal, he was parked in front of the venue, hearing the music blasting throughout the arena.

He dashed out of his car and thanked whatever higher being that was out there cause, luckily for him. They haven’t shut the doors yet.

He got a couple of weird looks as he made his way through the crowd, still in his work uniform, but he didn’t care as he nearly tripped while trying to find his seat, row 1, seat 7. What coincidence, he thought you sat at table number 7 the night he first saw you, and now he was sitting in seat 7 the first time he saw you perform. “Lucky number 7,” he said and smiled.

Once he found his seat, he looked up from his ticket, and his heart nearly stopped as he heard the last bit of your latest song.

His mouth parted in awe, and in the moment, he wasn’t sad and thinking about your breakup. He wasn’t going to see you to try and win you back. 

He just wanted to watch his baby perform in front of thousands in your guy’s hometown, just like you and him always talked about always dreamed about.

Once your song ended, the lights dimmed, and you went backstage to change your outfit, getting ready to sing your unreleased song.

It was something special you had prepared just for this stop in your hometown.

You knew it would only break your heart even more to do this, but you had to. It felt right.

You changed into the same outfit the day heeseung proposed to you, looking at yourself with a forced smile in the mirror. You prepared yourself for your final song.

The loud cheers were drowned out by your seemingly never-ending thoughts today. The concert was everything you dreamed of and more it’s just too bad that Heeseung wasn’t here to see how far you’ve come.

You just wished you hadn’t said what you said and did what you did. It was selfish and hurtful, and you can’t imagine what he must have felt like. He literally sacrificed so much for you. But you were too stuck up to put yourself in his shoes for one day. You think maybe if you had of just listened to him one of the countless times he tried to express how he was feeling, maybe that dreadful day would have never come, and maybe he’d be in the front row watching and cheering you on right now as you sang your 15th and final song of the night.

Your feet moved on their own as you walked onto the dark stage. You stood in the middle, a spotlight shining above you that slowly panned back to the crowd, now giving the room a warm feel.

Everyone cheered loudly once you came back out on the stage, and you thanked them with a warm smile once they had quieted down a bit. “I have something special planned, but before I perform my last song, I’d just like to thank each and every one of you for coming out tonight.”

You were overwhelmed by the crowd noise, but you were so grateful for how loved you were by so many. “As a lot of you know, this is my hometown, and I made my first hit single in a little studio just about fifteen minutes from here” The crowd went silent and held on to every word as you gave your final speech. You were even more grateful for how respectful your fans were. “Performing here has always been my dream, and now that it has become a reality, this moment now holds a special place in my heart, and I’ll never forget this for years to come” You fought back the tears and tried to finish. What you prepared without getting too emotional.

“You can do it,” Heeseung muttered as he watched you wiping a few stray tears and holding the mic up to your mouth once more as the crowd encouraged you by cheering and whistling. “That’s my strong girl” He smiled proudly as you started to speak again.

“One thing a lot of you don’t know is that I used to share that studio with my boyfriend, well actually fiancé and now ex” You could hear the crowd gasping at the news that you’ve never told anyone, not even your parents cause you knew no matter what you told them they’d blame it all on heeseung and he didn’t deserve that especially cause it was all your fault.

Heeseung immediately froze up. Were you talking about him?

No.

You must be talking about someone you met after him, he quickly concluded.

“I wrote this song for him because he’s the reason I’m standing on this stage tonight in front of you all right now when no one else believed in me. He did. When I couldn’t afford the rent for the studio, he worked extra shifts just to make my dream come true.”

This sounded a lot like the experiences you both went through, but heeseung didn’t want to get his hopes up. It’s been a year. You could have had multiple ex’s by now, for all he knows.

“I never forgot the day he proposed to me. It was the best day of my life. My first single had just finished playing on the radio, and out of nowhere, he popped the question, and of course, I said yes” You smiled softly.

Now he was positive you were talking about him, and he teared up immediately. He remembers that day like yesterday. No wonder you were wearing that outfit. It all made sense to him now, and he was more than grateful that you mentioned him at your live show.

“Everything seemed to be perfect. My career was taking off. We were going to get married in the summer of last year, but my tour came up, and we spent less time together and more time fighting until one day, I said a lot of things that I didn’t mean, and that led us to break up” you said heartbroken you knew you were sharing a little bit too much, but you hoped after performing here and getting all this weight off your chest it would help you heal even just a little bit.

More loud gasps and murmurs were heard, but you didn’t let it get to you too much cause people always had something to say, rather it was good or bad.

Heeseung couldn’t stand to watch you so vulnerable up there and all alone. He wanted to jump on stage and pull you in his arms and tell you that everything was okay.

“As bad as this might sound if I could, I’d trade my career to have him back” You took a deep breath. “I’d give up all this just to call him mine again.”

“Stop saying nonsense,” heeseung’s voice cracked as he smiled sadly, a tear escaping his eye and trickling down his cheek.

“If he were here, I would tell him I’m sorry for everything and that he was right and tell him just how much I still love him” No matter how hard you tried to fight it, you couldn’t hide the pain in your voice as you spoke those words straight from your heart.

“I love you too, baby. I promised I’d never stop loving you” He’s a thousand percent sure he was getting weird stares, but once again, he didn’t care. Nothing else mattered but you, him, and this once in a lifetime moment.

You tried to lighten the mood a bit before your last song. “Oh, and one more thing, I’m in the mood for steak,” you laughed, and so did the crowd. Even though they had no idea what you meant by that, you knew heeseung would, though, but you were still thankful that they played along.

“Always in the mood for steak,” He laughed quietly and blinked his tears away, dabbing his nose.

You gave the crew a thumbs up, and your final song played. “Thank you all for coming tonight. It has been an honor to perform here. This is my unreleased song dedicated to my wonderful ex-fiancé. It’s called “Nobody gets me,” you spoke softly into the mic. “Thank you for everything, and thank you to everyone who traveled to come see me. Please have a safe trip home. I love you all.” You blew a kiss to the audience.

Heeseung was taking in the moment glancing at the crowd as they all watched you with phones in their hands and the flashlight on. This is what you both always dreamed of big lights, thousands of people, and him proudly cheering for you in the crowd.

Halfway through the song, his ears perked up at the familiar words you sang.

♪ Nobody gets me like you.

How am I supposed to let you go? Only like myself when I'm with you.

Nobody gets me. You do♪

He remembered telling you those words the day he proposed, and his heart nearly leaped from his chest.

You remembered.

♪If I'm real, I deserve less If I was you, I wouldn't take me back. I pretend when I'm with a man, it's you, And I know that it's too late.♪

The next few lines made his heartache. He didn’t feel that way at all. He would have taken you back in a heartbeat if you had of just called and apologized.

♪I don't wanna lose what's left of you.♪

You subtly pointed to the engagement band around your neck, and he didn’t miss it. If his eyes were correct, that was his ring.

After seeing that there was no way he was going to leave without seeing you again, he had so many questions to ask.

Your eyes searched the faces in the crowd, something you did from time to time to connect with your audience. You saw one face that stood out from the rest, and you could have sworn you were dreaming or someone was playing tricks on you cause there’s no way lee heeseung, your ex-fiancé slash love of your life, was watching you perform with the brightest smile on his face.

But even when you blinked and looked again, he was still there, giving you a shy wave with a sheepish smile as you teared up. The song was coming to a close, and you only looked at him the whole time.

♪You do Nobody gets me, you do (do) You do Nobody gets me, you do (do, ooh) You do, Nobody gets me, you do (do, ooh)♪

You looked directly into his eyes, not blinking for even a second as you closed out the song with tears in your eyes.

♪Nobody gets me. You do.♪

The lights dimmed, and all you heard were cheers as you made your way to the dressing room, clutching your chest while everyone congratulated you on your amazing performance backstage.

What is he doing here?

How was he here?

Why was he here?

Did a friend drag him here, or did he actually come to see you so? Many questions were swirling in your head, and it gave you a headache.

You were nearly hyperventilating as you took a drink from your cold water bottle.

You had been sitting there thinking about the last performance thinking about the way he looked at you with that beautiful smile of his.

He looked just the same.

“There you are,” you heard the voice of one of your managers. “Look who came to see you,” Steve smiled. He had known you and heeseung since way back, all the way back before you made your first single. He was the one that set up your tour last summer. He didn’t know why he started seeing less and less of heeseung as time passed or how you two ended, but when he asked. You just told him you were taking a break, and he never brought it up again since you seemed sensitive about the topic.

You turned in your seat, having a feeling you already knew who it was, and when your eyes met, you could have sworn you stopped breathing.

There he was in all of his beauty, and you smiled slightly when you saw him still wearing his chef jacket.

He smiled back at you shyly, and wow, were you absolutely gorgeous, just the way he remembered you. He knew it’s only been a year, but still. “Thank you, Steve. I owe you one,” heeseung shook your manager's hand.

“Hey, how about one of your infamous steaks? Since we’re in town,” Steve patted heeseung on the back with a light chuckle.

“You got it,” heeseung agreed, and Steve waved at you both before leaving you two alone.

Now that heeseung was alone with you for the first time in a year, the nerves had built up all over again. Still, he took confident strides toward you before he could even make it to you. You were already sprinting over to him with tears in your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him tightly.

You knew you had no right to, but you couldn’t help yourself.

He automatically welcomed you into his embrace, and it felt like you were never apart for even a second. That’s just how familiar you felt to him. 

“Hey, it’s okay, don’t cry, it’s okay,” he shushed you and patted your head softly.

“I’m so sorry,” you said over and over again. Finally, after a year, you could say the words that you should have said the day he left, even before the day he left.

His heart broke at the sound of your weak sobs, and he couldn’t help but tear up as well. He always cried when you cried cause no matter what, he never wanted you to be alone in anything that you did. If you were happy, he was happy with you. If you were sad, he was sad. He was never in between. “It’s all okay now, baby. I forgive you.”

When he said baby, you literally froze in your tracks and pulled away from him. “Baby?” You asked with a confused tone fighting back a smile after hearing him call you that after so long.

“Yes, you never stopped being my baby” You pulled him even closer to you, pressing a kiss on his lips, both of you getting a taste of the salty tears that stained both your cheeks.

“Hee,” you mumbled breathlessly and looked him in the eyes. You were so nervous about doing this, but you had to. You pulled away from the hug and unclasped your necklace, taking off his ring. “I-“He had already outstretched his hand, waiting for you to slip his ring back on his finger where it belonged. “I love you so much, hee” He pulled you into another tight hug, rocking you back and forth gently.

“I love you too, I love you, I love you, I love you” He playfully kissed every inch of your face, and though few words were shared since seeing him again, your performance and his silver ring shining on his finger said more than a million words.

You giggle, and it was music to his ears to hear after so long. You played with his little cravat on his chef jacket just like before, and he smiled brightly. “So, are you still in the mood for steak?” He chuckled with a raise of his brow.

“I’m always in the mood for steak” He hooked his arm around your waist, leading you two out of the back of the venue. You’d get Steve to cover for you for your sudden disappearance.

“That’s my girl” He leaned down and kissed your lips sweetly as you clutched onto him tighter. “Just wait till chef sees this,” he smiles proudly at you.

You just looked at him quizzically, and he just gave you a smile. “Did you enjoy the concert?” You ask him excitedly.

“Well……” he chuckles nervously. “How about we talk about it over dinner, Hmm?”

“Sure” The smile never left either of your faces as you drove to the restaurant in his beater, hand in hand.

As you look at him, he stares back at you with that one-in-a-billion smile of his, you made a promise to yourself to never hurt him again, and you swore you’d do whatever it took to keep him and that beautiful smile on his precious face.

Cause you’d never find anyone else that gets you like him.

FIN.

Thank you for reading. Please reblog and leave feedback! - 🐹

[bidisasterevankinard]

I can't imagine a world with you gone

bucktommy / T / 3981

Buck was happy with Tommy and he wanted him to know it. He wanted to tell Tommy in words how he felt about him. But of course the moment Buck said the words “I’m happy”, universe said “Fuck you”. In the worst way possible. Or Buck has to see how universe tries to take Tommy from him.

(text under cut)

Buck never was so happy as the months he was dating Tommy. He never felt so settled in his skin and relationships, even in way longer relationships with Taylor he was missing part of himself. And it wasn't connected so much with the thing that he dated the man now. It was because for the first time Buck stopped feeling like he was trying too hard to play his part. Like somewhere his girlfriends left him the script he should have followed, but he never read it and always felt lost with them.

With Tommy he felt in his place. Like he finally belongs. Like he can finally do something right, because Tommy likes him despite his flaws, that the man had seen more and more with time passing, choosing to stay anyway. Tommy stayed even after Buck told him, or more like stuttered over every word, why he didn’t like the idea of seeing his parents again, how he wanted them to somehow not to be at the wedding, how he wanted just some more time before he would come out to them telling them about his bisexuality. 

The older man just hugged him, kissed his forehead and told him he shouldn’t feel bad about his parents' mistakes. But he also shouldn’t come out to them if he’s not ready. Tommy said that they could be “just friends” at the wedding. Buck looked at him like he was something else, something absolutely surreal. Not only Tommy wasn’t running from him because of his family drama, he gave him the way to hold the old mask in front of them longer.

Yet, Buck didn’t want it. When he saw the support and something so tender in Tommy’s clean sky eyes, he knew he would come out to them before the wedding. And he did. During the dinner on their first night in LA he looked at them and introduced them to his boyfriend, holding his big hand for support.

Since then their relationships have only gotten stronger. Buck met Tommy’s friends and family, found some stories about Tommy’s past in the 118, army and 217. Heard about some exes Tommy had. But most importantly he began to find out more and more details about what kind of person Tommy is now, falling in love with him every day. 

At their anniversary of the kiss tomorrow, Buck decided to get Tommy to the restaurant the man wanted to try for so long, but couldn’t find the time. So Buck went “all Buck” and found the way to book a table to woo his man on such an important day for them.

Buck was happy with Tommy and he wanted him to know it. He wanted to tell Tommy in words how he felt about him. But of course the moment Buck said the words “I’m happy”, universe said “Fuck you”. 

In the worst way possible.

It started as a big fire at the warehouse where some people were lost. It was just Buck’s call then. But they needed the help of more people, so Tommy’s station came to help, not just with air support, but with leaving some firefighters behind. 

Buck finds out Tommy is one of them already inside the warehouse, where he and Eddie found their victims and is ready to get them out. Tommy’s voice over the radio confirms the order to check the delta zone, and Buck can’t help but feel a strange weight on his heart. As if he should be shouting at Tommy to stay outside. He puts it down to the fact that he is not used to his boyfriend running into the fire like him, and not staying in helicopters skillfully piloting them.

Oh, how he is wrong.

He and Eddie are outside, passing their people to Hen and Chim, and fist bump each other, walking to Bobby, who listens to something said to him and pales. Buck already doesn't like it and he is ready to ask what is wrong when Bobby’s voice over the radio orders everyone to get out.

Everyone inside confirms it, and Buck is happy to hear Tommy too. He turns to the warehouse trying to see his boyfriend getting out when the worst happens.

Something explodes inside. And it explodes in the delta zone. In the zone where Tommy was. Buck for a few seconds can't even move, trying to make his eyes stop showing him a nightmare that can't be real. It can't be true. Tommy can't be in danger in a burning building. It's not true. Buck's just asleep and having a nightmare. He has to wake up. 

He. Has. To. Wake. Up.

But it’s real, he knows, when everyone around him goes loud, but he still can’t move. He hears Bobby order everyone who was inside to give him updates. One by one they confirm that they are going out. Everyone except Tommy.

“Firefighter Kinard, your status?” Bobby asks again, and Buck is pretty sure if he doesn’t not hear the answer this time, he will pass out because he is not breathing, scared to miss Tommy’s answer. He just listens, not breathing, not moving, only silently begging Tommy to answer. “Firefighter Kinard, what is your status?”

Nothing. Tommy still says nothing. 

The radio is silent. Someone starts saying something to Bobby, but Buck only listens when he hears Tommy’s name.

“Firefighter Kinard is still near the delta zone, but,” Buck’s heart misses a beat and he can see that Eddie near him doesn’t like where it goes too, “ he is not moving.” 

And that’s it. Buck fight or flight instinct kicks in, and the body and brain of first responder goes into action. He runs to the warehouse, but not even makes it half a way when strong hands behind him stop him, making him hit the person who dares to stop him from saving his boyfriend. 

“Buck stop,” the person screams at him.

It's Eddie. The traitor who doesn’t let him go and save his boyfriend is Eddie. 

“Stop it. You can’t help Tommy, when you don’t think straight,” Eddie pins him to his body, using all his power to hold Buck. “You don’t even have your mask and air tanks on you, how the hell are you going to go and save him? By killing yourself? Well, I will not let you. And Tommy wouldn’t let you too,” Eddie screams and Buck’s body goes weak. 

Eddie is right. His tank was empty so he took it off and his mask now possibly lays somewhere on the ground, where he lost it when couldn’t hold anything in his hands after he saw the explosion. 

“It’s Tommy, Eddie,” Buck turns his head to his best friend, not being strong enough to stop the tears from his eyes. “It’s Tommy. I-I should save him. I-I can’t lose him Eddie. Please I-I can’t,” he is crying and Eddie hugs him to his chest.

“I know, Buck. I know. Trust me I’m barely holding myself from running there too,” Buck hears in Eddie’s voice that it's true. Tommy and Eddie become friends quickly and they are close like all other 118 family members. Tommy means a lot to Eddie. 

“But we need to think straight,” Eddie’s voice becomes strict. It's the type of the voice Eddie uses on the worst call, when he tries hard to work with a cold head. “We need to let Bobby make the plan and let others save him.”

“B-but,” Buck tries to say it should be him who should save Tommy, but all the words are lost.

“You can’t help him now, Buck. Right now you should let other people help him,” Buck wants to cry from how right Eddie is. 

He knows deep down he is not even close to the head space where it would be safe for him to get into the burning building and save his boyfriend. He knows it's how it should be. But can’t just sit and wait for someone to save Tommy.

It should be him.

He again tries to fight Eddie, but the man overpowers him.

“Buck, I’ll sedate you if you do it again. Will be forever your number one enemy, but at least will save you.” 

Buck screams from pain hearing it.

“You-you never can be my enemy.” 

Eddie looks at him with so much pain in his eyes.

“If I don’t bring Tommy from there alive, save and sound, I’ll be.”

“Never,” Buck whispers, but Eddie hears it anyway. “You can never be my enemy. But please Eddie, please we need to find a way to get him out. And I need to be with you, please.”

Eddie nods.

“Grab the tanks, find a new mask and let’s hear what Bobby has for us.” 

They quickly do it all before coming back to Bobby. 

The man looks at Buck with so much emotion, Buck can’t look him in the eyes.

“I’m not sure I can let you inside, Buck,” Bobby’s captain's voice, yet with so much care, tells him that. “You and Tommy are in a relationship and we still don’t know what condition he can be in. I don’t want to risk anything.”

Buck begs, “Bobby, please, I…”

“You stay with Hen and Chim and let me and Eddie find him,” it’s said abruptly, without any of the care with which Bobby usually speaks, but Buck knows that the very fact that Bobby is putting him out of danger is an act of caring. He's just so angry at everything. He also is tired. So he just falls on his butt, hugging his knees, takes off his helmet and nods, already looking only at the doors from where he expects to see his boyfriend to get out.

It’s never happened, of course.

When Eddie and Bobby are almost out ready to go, he speaks with so much grief in his voice he doesn’t think he ever heard from himself, “Bring him back to me,” he looks them in the eyes. “Please bring him back to me. Alive.”

Buck knows they can’t promise anything, but Eddie still nods at him and Buck has never been so thankful to have him as best friend. 

Buck doesn’t know for how long he sits in the same position, probably no more than ten minutes, feeling how from time to time Chim and Hen glance at him for several seconds between moving to work on their next patients.

He knows they don’t just check to make sure he is not running in the building, but also because they are worried about him. Buck hates that, actually. It’s not him who is in danger in the burning building in who knows what condition. And Buck just sits there letting other people work to save his Tommy when he is first responder too. When he knows how to do the job, but he sits and waits, the only thing left for him it’s to hope. To hope that Bobby and Eddie will find Tommy soon and take him out so Buck can hug him hard and never let him out of his embrace.

He hopes to have a chance to hug and kiss Tommy again soon. He hopes to see his smile again. He hopes to have his boyfriend with him <i>alive</i>.

Familiar hands hug him and take his face in the crook of their neck and Buck only now understands that he was crying all this time. His tears run over his dirty cheeks. Feeling Athena’s powerful aura makes Buck feel a little bit better. He tries to take part of her strength she holds in all her body for himself.  He is also just simply seeking and thankful to feel all the maternal care she has for him right now.

“H-how are you…”Buck tries to gather his thoughts but they are as foggy as the air around them.

“Dispatch said they need more police for control. I was here for some time, and the moment I was free and wanted to find Bobby I saw you. Hen told me what happened. I’m so sorry Buck,” she hugs him tighter and he cries harder.

“I-I can’t lose him, Athena,”  he raises his gaze to her, seeing her face contorted in pain, surely only partially reflecting all the agonizing pain Buck is feeling right now. “He-he makes me feel alive. Really alive. For the first time in my life. He makes me happy and free. He-he… I just can’t lose him. I w-won’t survive it.”

Athena doesn’t say anything but she puts her hand on his head patting it with so much love, Buck cries more.

His chest hurts and he wants to scream how terrible the pain is, but screams are not coming. Because if he gives up to the pain, it will mean he gave up on Tommy and Buck will never dare to do it.

He will hope to the very end. He will hope till Bobby or the doctor will tell him otherwise. 

Bobby’s voice over the radio makes the pain worse and better at the same time.

“We have a firefighter down. He is pinned down and unconscious. Possible spinal and head injuries. We need another paramedic, jaws, C-collar and backboard in the hall between the delta zone and west exit.” 

He wants to run in the building again, but now it’s Athena, like Eddie before, who doesn't let him. Buck watches how Chim and Ravi run inside.

Next minutes somehow are worse and longer than the time he didn't know Tommy's condition. But then he sees his family running out of the building with his boyfriend on the backboard, still unconscious, but Buck can see how his chest is moving and for now it’s enough for him.

This time he doesn’t let anyone stop him from running to his Tommy, jumping in the ambulance with Chim and Hen. No one really stops him.

He takes as little space as he can, letting Chim and Hen work their magic, just holding Tommy’s hand, counting his pulse and trying to breathe in this rhythm.

He kisses dirty knuckles and sends all his strength and fight to his boyfriend.

“I know you're unconscious, but I don’t care. You will listen to me and you will do how I say,” Buck kisses the pulse point on Tommy’s hand. “You will fight every minute when we’ll pass you to the doctors. You will wake up after they’ll put you into your room and you’ll see me sitting near you and you’ll smile and I’ll kiss you. And then we will book the table in this restaurant I booked for us again and we will have another anniversary there,” Buck holds Tommy’s hand near his lips saying it. “You are not allowed to leave me, you hear me? I don’t allow you to leave me. You stuck with me Kinard. And I won’t let you stop fighting to come back to me,” Buck kisses ring finger. “One day I’ll put the ring here so you have to fight. For me. For yourself. For <i>us</i>. Please, Tommy, please. I can't imagine a world with you gone.”

He cries again, kissing Tommy’s hand till he has to let him go so doctors can save his heart. 

Time in the waiting rooms has been going on for an insanely long time. So long that Eddie has time to bring him a change of clothes and make him change in it and wash his face in the restroom. Bobby brings them food and coffee from the dinner near the hospital and all his family looks at him till he manages to swallow half of his portion. 

All he can do is look at the clock, counting minutes till some hours later the doctor comes to tell him that Tommy is fine. No spinal injury, just some bruise on his back, but his pinned hand needed surgery to fix it and Tommy would need a lot of PA. The man also has a lot of bruises, smoke inhalation and a gash on his head that's already been stitched up. But it doesn’t look like he has a concussion. He'll be kept overnight for observation, but he should be able to go home pretty soon.

Buck’s knees buckle under him, when the doctor says the last sentence and he lets the big cry escape him. Bobby and Eddie put him back up and move him to the room the doctor said belongs to the man.

He enters it alone, as the doctor said only one person can stay, and he tells Bobby and Eddie to go home. They hesitate.

“I’m going to be ok,” Buck says to them, but all his attention is already on the man in the bed. 

Buck hears the door closing when he is already near the bed, sitting on the uncomfortable chair, taking the hand he was holding in the ambulance in his. 

“Thank you, baby. Thank you for coming back to me,” Buck traces with his hand the wound on the head carefully and then kisses Tommy’s forehead. “Now rest, baby. I’ll be here.”

He gets as comfortable as he can in the chair, holding his thumb near Tommy’s pulse point and letting his body crash from exhaustion.

-

Buck wakes up hearing someone call him by the name. He opens his eyes, hissing from the pain in his neck, and he sees Tommy who is looking at him with a cute smile.

“You awake,” Buck kisses him, finally exhaling the last tension and pain from everything that happened yesterday.

“Yeah, I am,” Tommy looks at him like Buck puts the sun and stars on the skies. 

“What? Why do you look at me like that?”

“You stayed with me all night,” Tommy shrugs and then hisses. Buck rushes to help him to put his bed in the sitting position. 

“Of course I did. Why wouldn’t I? You're my boyfriend and I’m your emergency contact.”

“No one did before.”

It makes Buck sad and angry at all the other partners Tommy had. Thay had this perfect man and never could stay the night with him at the hospital? Well, it’s their loss. 

“I’m not like them,” Buck looks at their intertwined hands. “And it’s the least I could do for you,” he says, frustrated with himself. For being so weak his team had to stop him from saving his boyfriend.

“Why do you say that, baby?” Tommy looks at him confused.

“I couldn’t save you. E-Eddie had to stop me from running into the warehouse without the mask and the tanks because I lost any cool I have as a first responder. I couldn’t save you. I was just sitting here looking at how the team saved you. Waiting hours for doctors to save you. I did nothing except waiting and hoping for you to be ok,” Buck admits with tears running his cheeks and he can’t look Tommy in the eyes, not wanting to see disappointment in them.

“You did more than you can imagine, baby. You let people you love save you from doing something stupid like run into the fire without proper equipment,” Tommy raises his head using a weak grip in his chin. His blue eyes are kind and caring. “You let the people who you trust save me. And you stayed near me all this time, thinking about me. Trust me, Evan. It’s enough. I need you to be safe too,” Tommy kisses his knuckles. “I wouldn’t forgive myself if you would be hurt because of me.”

“Stop being the one to comfort me. It’s not me who is in the hospital bed,” Buck kisses him again, saying thank you with the kiss for being so caring and gentle with him. 

“You can comfort me by saying I can go back to work soon,” Tommy nods to his hand in the cast.

“Sorry, baby, but the doctor said a month in the cast and then a month of PA,” Buck kisses the pouting man. “I promise you will be ok really quick. You also have a lot of bruises all around your body and had smoke inhalation, but they took you from the oxygen during the night.”

Tommy nods, “could be way worse.”

“Yeah,” Buck swallows, still feeling the cold of the fear of the possibility to lose Tommy forever, “but let’s not challenge the universe, please.”

Tommy smirks but agrees.

“You know, there’s a thing you can actually do for me,” his boyfriend says with a playful smile and Buck nods to him to continue. He is ready to do anything for his boyfriend. “Kiss it better.” 

Buck chuckles on the way Tommy pouts his lips, but leans to him anyway leaving the most tender kiss he can, translating all his love and fear of losing it to his man in it.

He was thinking about saying “I love you” the moment Tommy will wake up, but decided against it. They deserve better than it. Something sweet and tender, not with the aftertaste of pain and fear. So the kiss is a good alternative for now.

-

Two days after the fire Tommy is discharged and Buck takes him to his house, sending his man to rest on the couch while he cleans and cooks and then goes to have dinner with Tommy at the couch, not forgetting to grab the pain pills for the man and water.

“I cooked different meals and froze them. There's food for at least a week. All the instructions about pre-heating are left on the fringe for the moments when I can't be here. But I’ll come after and before my shifts and I spend time with you here on my days off, ” Buck says, while he cleans the dishes. 

Tommy insisted on sitting with him in the kitchen because he missed him while Buck was doing all the chores.

“Or you could just stay here with me without running between my house, loft and station,” Buck turns to Tommy who looks pretty confident, yet Buck sees in his eyes he is scared about Buck’s answer. “Do you want to move in with me?”

Buck puts the last dish on the shelf, wipes his hands with a towel and comes to his boyfriend, falling on his knees to kiss him. 

When they part, they both smile so much, “Yes, yes, I want to move in with you,” Buck kisses him again and then whispers in his lips. “I love you. So much. Wanted to say it on our anniversary after a big romantic dinner, but I don’t want to spend more days without saying it to you. I love you, Tommy.”

Tommy’s huge smile blindes Buck like the sun on the warm summer day.

“I love you too, Evan. So, so much,” they kiss again and Buck can’t wait to spend all his life doing it. 

“When can you move?” Tommy asks after they end the kiss.

“I can pack my most important things the day after tomorrow as it’s my day off and take it all here. Then I’ll talk to my landlord about ending the lease and just pack all other things.”

“Good,” Tommy kisses his birthmark now. “I want you to feel here like home.”

Buck chuckles, “I will feel like home not because my stuff stays here,” he cups Tommy’s face in his hands, “I feel like home with you. No matter where we are.”

“You’re such a sup,” Tommy laughs, kissing his birthmark again. 

“Said the man who made me a playlist of songs he associates with me.” 

Tommy shuts him the same way he did when he kissed him for the first time. Buck can’t be happier his man uses this tactic to shit him any time he wants.

He just can’t imagine himself happier when he's with Tommy. 

[harringtonstilinski]

You're So Dense - Steve Harrington

Author: @harringtonstilinski​ Characters:��Steve Harrington x Henderson!Reader Word Count: 3,239 Warnings: fluff, flashback, use your imagination for steve explaining what he likes about this "mystery girl", Requested: no | yes; came from this prompt list Smut: no | yes; A/N: Hi, friends! If you like this chapter, please do not hesitate to reblog and give some feedback, whether it be in the reblogs, comments, or my inbox. As always, read at your own risk and enjoy 😊

steve harrington playlist

steve harrington masterlist

Dense. That’s the only word you could use to describe your best friend. Your best friend you’ve had since Sophomore year of high school. The very same best friend that was always late for school, who came into class with a freaking bagel from the local bakery. That same best friend who never wore a watch until both of your Senior year.

Who is this best friend? None other than Steve The Hair Harrington. The two of you bonded over your love of music, specifically all the pop music that was constantly playing on the radio, as well as all the music your parents listened to when they were young. Your favorite songs being (They Long To Be) Close To You by The Carpenters and Baby by Styx.

Steve had kept his distance from you, though, when Will Byers went missing, your little brother’s best friend. You were a part of the search parties to look for the little boy, Steve having his own drama with Nancy Wheeler, and eventually, somewhat defeating one of the Demogorgons that had come through from the Upside Down.

Steve and Dustin’s attempts at keeping you away from the tunnels and the Demodogs were fruitless. Steve especially tried to keep you away, but you weren’t having any of it after learning just months before that Dustin was almost Demogorgon food. All you wanted to do was protect Dustin, since you didn’t get the opportunity the first time, and that’s exactly what you did.

You protected Dustin, along with your new friend Robin and Lucas’ little sister Erica, against the Russians that were hiding under Starcourt Mall, as well as the big ass 30 foot Mind Flayer last Summer, and now you’re currently trying to figure out how you all can defeat a new monster by the name of Vecna.

Your little group that consisted of yourself, Steve, Dustin, Robin, Nancy, Erica, Lucas and Max Mayfield were all at the Creel House to get clues on how to defeat Vecna. After Robin threw a brick through the front door window, which was beautiful, by the way, Steve reached his arm inside, unlocking and opening the door.

Steve whistled as he looked back at you before moving to his left, letting the rest of you enter the house, Lucas going to the lamp by the door, trying to turn it on before he said, “Looks like someone forgot to pay their electric bill.”

Snickering, you covered your mouth, concealing the laugh that was begging to be released as you and Dustin held up your flashlights, turning them on.

“Where’d everyone get those?” Steve asked.

Turning around, Dustin faced your best friend before eyeing you. He turned his sights back to Steve, saying, “Do you need to be told everything?”

Placing a hand on his shoulder, you grabbed his attention, saying, “You’re not a child, Steve.”

After his eyes danced between yours for a moment, he said, “Thank you,” as you reached into Dustin’s backpack, retrieving the extra flashlight from the back pocket.

“There ya go, big guy,” you whispered, following Dustin as he dropped the backpack.

What you didn’t know was that Steve’s eyes stayed on your back as you moved, confused as to why you called him that. But what he didn’t know was that your cheeks grew hot at your use of the nickname.

“They just… left… everything,” Nancy said.

“I guess a triple homicide isn’t good for resale value,” Robin added.

Silently agreeing with her as you slowly approached the two girls, you smiled a little to yourself, Robin’s humor your favorite part about her. Your attention was brought from the two of them to Max as she said, “Hey, guys.”

Turning to face Max, you looked at the back of her head before moving your eyes to the clock she was standing in front of, light pointed towards it as she asked, “You all see that, right?”

You moved closer to her, standing between her and Dustin as he and Steve answered, “Yeah.”

“Is this what you saw? In your… visions?” Nancy asked, the redhead nodding her head in confirmation. 

“I’m sure this is just an ordinary grandfather clock, Nancy Drew,” you answered, moving the clock and running your hand over the glass covering the face to reveal a small part of it before looking back at Max, to say in a reassuring tone, “It’s just a regular old clock.”

As you softly smiled at her, Steve asked, “Why is this wizard obsessed with clocks? Is he like a… a clockmaker or something?”

Sighing, you walked back over to him, placing your hand on his chest to look into his eyes as you said, “ I think you cracked the case there, Harrington.”

Nancy’s voice grabbed your attention as your breathing hitched a little at Steve’s eyes on yours as she said, “All I know is the answers are here… somewhere. Okay, everyone stay in groups of two. Henderson, stay with your brother and Steve. Robin, upstairs.”

Max walked towards Lucas, putting her hand on his arm as she passed him, saying, “Come on, let’s go.”

You and your brother looked at each other before looking at Steve, the both of you giving him a smile in unison before he sighed. “Was that a sigh?” Dustin asked.

“Yup, totally sounded like it,” you voiced.

“No, I did not sigh,” Steve answered, going around you two to the stairs.

“Why’d you sigh, Steve?” you asked, deciding to pester him.

Climbing the stairs, Steve said, “I didn’t sigh. Just come on, guys.”

“We heard you,” you and Dustin said in unison.

“W-we’re always partners, okay?”

“And what’s wrong with that?” you asked, trying very hard to not look at his ass that was currently in your face.

“It’d just be nice to, I don’t know, mix it up a little,” Steve said.

“Are you we boring you, Harrington? Because I would seriously like to know if you wanna be partners with us or with Nancy.”

When you three made it to the top of the stairs, he turned to face you, a slightly confused look on his face as he asked, “Wait, what? Why would you think–”

Breaking the connection between your eyes, you walked off to the nearest room, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath, releasing it as you heard footsteps behind you, Steve’s voice coming into your ears a few seconds later as he asked, “Hey, Henderson?”

“Which one?” Dustin asked.

“Either.”

Sighing, you asked, “What, Steve?”

“Could you maybe, uh… clarify what sort of clues we’re supposed to be looking for?”

Turning to face him, you answered Steve by saying, “The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes,” in your best British accent, Steve giving you a look as you smiled at him. “Sherlock Holmes,” you said.

When his look didn’t change, you sighed and rolled your eyes, turning and walking to the floor vent on your left as Steve said, “That’s great.”

Bending down, you opened it, picking up a jar and looking at the contents inside, immediately wishing you hadn’t upon seeing a spider inside the glass. Seeing something crawling on your arm from your periphery, you dropped the jar and started running backwards out of the room, screaming while trying to brush the arachnid off of you.

“Henderson, Henderson–”

“Get it off, get it off!!” you screamed, hands landing on Steve’s arms as Nancy’s voice sounded, the girl asking, “What’s wrong?”

“Spi-spider,” you breathed, closing your eyes. “There was a spider. A-a-a black widow.”

Feeling Steve’s arms disappear from your hands, you quickly opened your eyes, watching as he closed the door and came back to stand in front of you, looking above your head as he said, “Don’t go in there.”

Sighing, you closed your eyes again before feeling Nancy’s hand in your hair as she said, “Oh, oh. Wait–”

“What? Is it still on me?” you asked, moving the mirror that was only a few feet away.

Steve and Nancy followed you, the latter saying, “Stop moving, let me–”

“I can get them, Nance,” Steve said, carding his fingers through your hair as Nancy moved to stand beside you. “I got it,” he whispered.

“Thanks, Steve,” you whispered back.

Robin’s voice almost sent you into panic mode as she said, “If there’s a spider nesting in there, you’re never gonna find it until it lays eggs and all the babies spill out.”

“Robin Buckley, you shut your mouth,” you said, sternly. “What’s wrong with you?”

She chuckled as she walked past you three, Steve’s sigh bringing you back to the moment, feeling as if you two were the only ones in the house… or in the world.

“She’s got problems,” he whispered, eyes glued to your hair as he fished the webs out.

Taking a deep breath, you released it, saying, “Yeah, tell me about it.”

“I like that you two are friends. Maybe after we find Vecna, kill him, save the world and stuff, maybe we can all go out or something.”

A smile danced across your lips, Nancy coming in your peripheral as her own smile tried to form. It was no surprise to you that she still might’ve had feelings for Steve, even though she was with Jonathan. 

Or maybe it was her way of being friendly with him. You couldn’t exactly remember what it was like with them when they were together, but what you could remember was the fact that she always had a smile on her face any time she was around him… except when Barbra Holland went missing.

Steve’s voice brought you back to the present as he said, “Ya’know, me, you, Nancy, Jonathan when he’s back, maybe Robin, too.”

“And Eddie,” you said, softly. “Can’t forget him. He’s pretty much part of this friend group now.”

“Yeah, I mean, it’s not like we’re dating,” he added. “Me and Robin, it’s not like we’re dating. She told you? That we’re not?”

You started laughing, resting your hand on the table next to you. “Yes, Steven. I know that you two aren’t dating. I know all about Robin, remember? I was there in that mall bathroom when she explained everything. I know that you two are platonic.”

“Platonic with a capital P,” Robin added.

“Yes, ma’am, thank you.”

Using a softer voice that was almost a whisper, Steve said, “I mean… I would date her… it’s just… she’s…”

Your face fell, all the humor dissolving away as he tried to continue explaining, “We’re friends… nevermind… you know… we’re just friends.”

Nancy had moved to stand in front of you, grabbing your hands in hers to give you comfort. She knew about your crush on Steve, and she was happy when you had told her about it a few weeks ago. 

“Nancy!” you whisper exclaimed, looking down at her from your spot on the couch. “I need to talk to you. Like, now.”

She nodded her head, getting up from her spot on the floor, to the two of you walking up the stairs of Steve’s house and into his bedroom, where she closed the door behind you. “What’s up?” she asked.

“I think I like Steve,” you blurted out, hand covering your mouth.

Breathing a sigh of relief, she put a hand on her chest. “Well, that’s a relief! I’m glad you finally came to your senses.”

“Wait,” you said, eyebrows pinched in confusion. “You knew?” Chuckling, she said, “It’s kind of obvious to everyone but Steve. The way you look at him, the way you were just sitting next to him.”

“H-how was I sitting?”

“You’re trying not to lean into him. His arm is resting on the back of the couch behind your head! That’s an open invitation.”

Suddenly feeling your cheeks heat up, you quickly decided to come up with an excuse to everyone else downstairs as to why you needed to leave. “I have to go home. I-I can’t be around him right now when I just realized that I like him and-and I just–”

“It’s okay,” Nancy said, putting a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “Just tell everyone you weren’t feeling good. I’ll make sure Dustin gets home.”

Giving her a hug, you sighed, “Thanks, Nance.”

You both went back downstairs and you gave your excuse of not feeling well that you’d see everyone the next day after some rest. Steve had offered to take you home, even though you drove yourself and Dustin, to which you kindly rejected.

After arriving home that night, you talked with your mom about your feelings before you went off to your room to lay down, getting a decent night’s sleep before hanging out with the group the following day.

Feeling Steve’s hands on your shoulders, you were brought back to the present, yet again, as he said, “There. All better.”

Turning to face him, you softly smiled at him and said, “Thanks, Steve.”

Softly chuckling, he looked into your eyes before casting them down to look toward his shoes before he whispered, “Guess we should, uh, get back to the investigation.”

“Right.”

Without missing a beat, he said, “The obvious things are not what people observe.” Snorting, you covered your mouth as he continued, “Or… do… don’t observe… or… whatever the hell you- well… Sherlock Holmes.”

“You get credit for trying.”

“Thanks,” he whispered before turning around and walking into the room that was behind him, leaving you to stand there confused before you turned to face Nancy, the two of you whispering, “What?”

~~~

After everyone found Vecna in the attic with the flashlights and they all burst in your hands, you all left the Creel House and went back to the Wheeler house, where you, Dustin and Steve collected his car.

Once the three of you made it back to yours and Dustin’s house, the latter got out of the car, yawning and made his way inside as you and Steve stayed in the vehicle.

“Hey, Henderson?” Steve said.

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you something?”

Sighing, you responded, “You can ask me anything, Steve. You know that.”

Looking at him as he nodded, you couldn’t help but think to yourself that he was going to ask about Nancy. That’s where your mind always went to when he needed to ask you a question.

“Do you, uhm… do you like anyone?” he asked, tentatively. Steve was afraid that you’d say yes but not say that it was him. He liked you, that much was certain. The very same night a few weeks ago after you left, he talked with Robin about his feelings for you, the girl simply telling him, “If you like her that much, just talk to her. The worst she could say is no.” So, he decided as the two of you sat in his car that he was going to ask you about it.

“Uhm, yeah. I do.” You smile while giving your answer, wanting so badly to tell him that it was him you liked.

Sighing, he softly nodded his head, looking down at a spot on his jeans. “Do I… do I know him?”

“Very much so.” Looking over at him, you could see the defeat in his eyes and on his face. “Do you like anyone?”

Steve looked at you, a look in his eyes that you should recognize, but was choosing not to read into like you normally did. “Yeah. I do.”

“What do you like about her?”

“What do you like about him?”

Steve thought you had a crush on Eddie, which is what really prompted him to ask you. Was he a fan of Eddie’s? Not particularly, no. Along with everyone in town, Steve thought Eddie was a freak because he liked to play D&D. 

You, on the other hand, didn’t think he was a freak. Since Dustin joined Hellfire, your friendship with Eddie grew to the point where it’s like Steve and Robin’s friendship; strictly platonic. Eddie was a sweet soul, not this demonic satan worshiper that the whole town thought he was.

“Uhm,” you said, taking a deep breath. “I like the fact that he makes me smile. He’s not someone I thought I’d be friends with.”

“What was he like?” Steve asked, his curiosity piqued.

Chuckling, you looked out of the windshield towards your house as you said, “A complete asshole. I don’t wanna give too much away, though.”

“No, I wanna know.”

Shaking your head, you looked at him, a small smile on your face. “Tell me about this girl.”

Mimicking your movements, he looked out of the windshield, saying, “She’s amazing. She’s not afraid to speak her mind.” As he started listing off all of the things he liked about this mystery girl, you couldn’t help but feel a little sad.

Tears started to prick your eyes, so that was your cue to get out of the car, Steve’s voice stopping mid sentence. 

“Hey, where ya going?”

“Inside,” you said, closing the car door.

Getting out of his seat, Steve said, “Wait, why?”

Your movements stopped as you sighed and closed your eyes. “Because I really don’t wanna hear about this mystery girl.”

What you had failed to realize, in Steve’s eyes, that the mystery girl… was you. But, in your eyes, the mystery girl was Nancy.

“Okay, well… same for the mystery boy you mentioned,” he said, arms crossed over his chest. 

“Oh, my god,” you whispered. Turning to face him, you said, “Okay, so I guess I’m just going to have to spell everything out for you because you clearly think I don’t like you when that could not be more wrong.”

Steve’s eyes went as wide as saucers at hearing the words that just escaped from your lips. 

“I. Like. You. Steve.” You moved toward him with each word you spoke. “You, Steve. Not some mystery guy. You. You make me smile, you make me laugh. You’re my shoulder to cry on, my protector, even though I don’t need it.

“You’re everything I’ve looked for in a guy, despite the fact that you were a complete asshole Junior year. I like to think I had something to do with that change in you, but we all know it was Nancy that changed you.

“You’re sweet, and caring, and I love the way you’ve protected the Party. I especially love the way you’ve taken Dustin under your wing. He’s needed a brotherly figure since our dad just up and left.”

The two of you hadn’t realized that you were so close to each other, getting lost in the other’s eyes as you had walked towards him during your explanation.

“But most importantly, Steve… I like you because you’re you. Not to mention, you’re hot as hell–”

Your words were interrupted by Steve’s hands cupping your cheeks, his own voice saying, “Shut up, Henderson,” before kissing you. Shock ran through your system for a split second before you kissed him back.

With your lips moving in sync, you got lost in the being that was Steve Harrington. 

Pulling away from you for a moment before resting his forehead against yours, Steve took a deep breath before saying, “You’re so dense.”

You chuckled, closing your eyes as your arms came to rest on his shoulders, your fingers lightly playing with the hair at the base of his neck as you replied, “No, Steve. You’re dense."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N 2:  hi, friends! let me know what you thought about! again, please do not hesitate to reblog and give some feedback, whether it be in the reblogs, comments, or my inbox.

Additional Notes: i'm so sorry if this sucks major balls... i don't know how to write dense characters... kbye!! <3

~~~

Forever / Everything Taglist: @stiles-o-dylan24 @stixnstripesworld @fandom-princess-forevermore @quanticobae @mischiefandi @kellyashcroft @lauren-novak

Steve Harrington Taglist: @madaboutjoe​

If you’re tagged and didn’t want to be, please let me know.

Italics wouldn’t let me tag!

~~~

*Please don’t post my writing anywhere else without my consent. The author of this work will always and forever be @harringtonstilinski​.

All characters, story lines, and plot aside from y/n and her storyline & plot, are all of the work of The Duffer Brothers.

*These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited.

No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher.

Posted on March 7, 2024

[charon-cries]

we're lucky Lestat de Lioncourt doesn't have tumblr, the drama he'd get into on here would be wild

#is this anything #he'd probably get cancelled instantly #also side note for future reference #i'm making this post before season 3 #so if anything in this is incompatible with amc canon #that's because i'm working off of seasons 1 + 2 and the books #okay ty have a nice day

32 notes

🎧 audiofilled Follow

ANOTHER of my mutuals went missing after buying a backstage pass to a vampire lestat concert. she didn't post pictures, nothing, and she's been radio silent since her last post (which was about how she was about to go backstage...) and i really think we should be taking this more seriously. so.

reasons why i think "lestat de lioncourt" may be running a cult or something:

Keep reading

🐺 the-vampire-lestat

Absolutely ridiculous. I am very open about what I am, you do not need to resort to senseless conspiracy theories to figure out where your little friend went.

🎧 audiofilled Follow

are you incapable of dropping the vampire bit for ONE moment? people are going MISSING and you're still doing your corny roleplay bit?

#discourse #TVL disappearances #callout

362 notes

📚 daniel-molloy

It's day number seventy-three of surviving this God forsaken website solely to keep tabs on Lestat's social media presence, and I'm still trying to decipher the lingo you people use here. What the Hell does, "I'm bald," even mean?

#the vampire lestat

137 notes

🪽 arun-rising

Did anyone else notice Lestat only posts during the night, in whichever timezone he's in while on tour? True commitment to the bit. Or the bite, I suppose.

🩸 carmillized

weren't you posting about how much you despise his music just yesterday???

🪽 arun-rising

I don't know what you're talking about. I never did that.

🩸 carmillized

You are correct. I believe you without question. I do not even know why I said that in the first place. I do not recall you posting about Lestat de Lioncourt before this.

#sorry OP i was out of line #now that i'm thinking about it though #this post is making me wonder if lestat could be a real vampire #i hadn't seriously considered it until this very moment #something came over me... #wonder why

40 notes

🐺 the-vampire-lestat

New song.

Listen, if you dare.

📷 disintegrated-wonder

Lestat, I thought we were over this...?

#louis talks

893 notes

🧷 baby-jenks

Wouldn't it be wild if we all just spontaneously combusted? Haha. Glad that will never happen

#fang gang #vampblr #random thought #it's unlikely

4 notes

👴🏻 marius-official Follow

How does this website work...?

🦇 fang-fan

delete your blog

#rank vibes on this man

1,425 notes

🐾 interview-wolf-the-werewolf Follow

Sponsored with Blaze 🔥

Check out my new book. It's a biography, about me, written by an award-winning journalist, chronicling my life as a werewolf. It's 100% factual and real, a real breath of fresh air in a world filled with fiction attempting to pass itself off as reality.

#iwtw #my posts #my book #me #werewolf #wolf #awoo #please i need to feed my litter of twelve #this book is all i have

5,762 notes

🩸 carmillized

hey all! i know that my mutual, audiofilled, is a little bit divisive in the music fandom rn, but i'm getting a little worried. i haven't heard from him since he made that post speculating about where TVL fans have been disappearing to. please send me an ask or a dm if you've heard from him!

#talk tag #getting a little worried #he's probably okay though

47 notes

🐺 the-vampire-lestat

Just had a lovely dinner. It's nice when your food is in tune with you, yes? Makes the blood sit well in the veins.

🦇 fang-fan

ur so funny

#edit: sorry for posting while audiofilled is missing #i didn't hear about it until just now

1,409 notes

🩸 carmillized

okay i just can't get over how he talks about himself. i don't know if it's just him being "in character" or if this is just how the guy acts irl, but he's so self-aggrandizing that i've been questioning it

no nuance/bald/other, you have to decide on the spot right now what you believe

📚 daniel-molloy

He's lying.

👩‍💻 talamascized-witch

I don't believe him for a second.

#archive #poll #lestat de lioncourt

[word-wytch]

Don't Stand So Close To Me — Chapter 10

Eddie x Teacher!Reader

Chapter 10/? 4.6k. Series Masterlist

✏︎ Progress report — subtle strides in secret and deals not forgotten.

✏︎ Series Summary: Forced to move back home to Hawkins after your fiancé cheats on you, you begin to fall in love again with an audacious 20 year old metalhead, only there’s one problem — he’s still in high school and you’re his English teacher.

While you struggle starting over in a place you never thought you would return, Eddie struggles feeling stuck in a place he can’t manage to leave — until you offer to help him. Of all the lessons learned, the most important are the ones you teach each other.

✏︎ Series CW: forbidden romance, slow burn, true love, smut (18+ mdni), internal conflict, student-teacher relationship, 10 year age gap, mutual pining, sexual tension, emotions, drama, angst, character development, happy ending :)

Chapter warnings: flirting, rule breaking, mild exploration through touch, cheating mention

Monday, November 11th 1985

The fog was lifting in you. 

You could tell when the laundry beckoned to be folded after weeks of neglect. When the act of folding it was something you wanted to do.

When the boxes that had become part of the scenery in your living room suddenly seemed like they didn’t belong there. When you wanted to cook more than just things you could put in a microwave. 

You would wake up on the weekend and ask yourself what you wanted to do with the little free time you had in the space between the chores, and the errands, and the papers you had to grade. You would ask yourself what records you wanted to listen to instead of just turning on the radio to fill the space with noise. Instead of exhausting them all without consideration.

You had been asking yourself a lot of questions over the last two weeks. The loudest of them all — What am I doing?

You would ask yourself this question every morning as you brushed on your makeup and felt more beautiful than you could remember, even since before your life came crashing down this summer. 

You would ask yourself again as you sifted through your closet, as the hangers screeched against the metal pole to dig out a dress from the back that you hadn’t worn in ages. Cream colored linen, tea length, with short puff sleeves, a square neckline, and buttons down the front. It tapered at the banded waist and flowed outward in an A line. 

The question would rattle like a pinball in your mind as you stamped your punch card in the main office. As the receptionist complimented the dress that you had on.

It would sit like a weight in your stomach as you made small talk with the other teachers. As you sat in one of the old scratchy chairs in the teachers’ lounge that suddenly bothered you less and opened the lunch you found the energy to pack again.

It would echo in your thoughts like the clicking of your footsteps down the hallway. 

What am I doing?

It was a question you didn’t know the answer to. 

All you knew was when the wind caught your dress from the haste you made toward your classroom, the smile you stole from him as you passed brought silence to it. That the way he looked at you made all noise, all else, cease. That it made you feel as timeless as he said you were. 

There was a change in him too. It was subtle, as all things were in your relationship with Eddie Munson, but ever since some force beyond yourself possessed you to utter even the barest inkling of your feelings, he was bolder.

He would sit very close to you, oftentimes with his shoulder angled behind you. An action equally as thrilling as it was terrifying. He had done this before on a few prior occasions but never like this. Never for this long. 

He always took his jacket off so you could feel his arm graze against yours as he reached to turn a page or grab a pencil. 

He would do these things so often that there was a quiet, secret part of you that wondered whether it was time to rearrange your classroom so that your desk was out of sight of the doorway. You shot the thought down the moment it intruded. As long as the desk was within eyeshot, you could ration that the possibility of being seen would hold you both accountable and encourage good behavior. That was what you told yourself anyway. 

The problem was that Eddie Munson wasn’t that concerned with good behavior.

Every time he sat beside you, your eyes, in the closeness of his proximity, would find another feature to admire. 

Today it was the rips in his jeans. The way you could see his skin straining against the slits in the fabric. How your eyes could gather the strong angles of his kneecaps and for some reason, this was doing things to you. You would steal glances at them, down and to your right, as he leaned forward in his seat next to you. 

It was always next to you. It had been for the past two weeks.

He pointed at a drawing of a humanoid demon looking creature with horns and a tail in the monster manual laid out in front of you on top of his history textbook. 

“So this is the tiefling race, which is what I played years ago before I took over as DM. I was a tiefling bard, which is like a sort of, uh, musician spellcaster.” 

That was another change — how frequently he would get off topic, and how often you would let him. 

“Very true to life then,” you said with a little chuckle.

His lips curled into a hardened smirk to smother a blinding grin. 

“You think so?” There was a whisper of pink in his cheeks. 

“Oh yeah, absolutely,” you said breathlessly.

Then he did something he hadn’t done before — he put his arm around the back of your chair.

The animal inside you preened. 

Heart racing, you turned your head ever so slightly, allowing your eyes to trace the barely there stubble that peppered his jaw before they wandered to his lips — soft, broad, and still smirking. You were close enough to feel the delicate hairs that strayed from his wild curls brush your cheek. Close enough to feel the warmth radiate from his arm against the linen of your back, like a bubble of protection, or some other magic found in the pages sprawled out before you.

It was hard to think of anything else but you managed. “What do you think I would play?”

“Mmm.” His hum was a warm vibration at your ear. It sent a ripple to your core. Ringed fingers drummed against the back of your seat. “Well, an elf, obviously,” he chuckled. “As for class, let’s see…” 

You could feel the weight of his eyes on you, scanning you as the gears turned in his head. It was quiet in the room, and in the hallway. Quiet enough to hear your heartbeat in your ears. You wondered if he could too.

“See I wanna say wizard because they get their magic from reading books, but…”

You raised your eyebrows playfully. “But?” 

“I think you’re more of a healing type."

“Oh yeah?” Your soft chuckle filled the silence and you allowed yourself, for just a moment, to relax a little bit. To lean into the warmth of his strong shoulder, enveloped in the safety of the secret you both shared. You could catch his scent from this position more than ever. The warm musk emanating from under his arm. The whisper of shampoo and cigarettes. That soft, indescribable scent of his skin. It almost made you dizzy. 

“Yeah, like a cleric, only they get their power from worshiping deities and… I don’t know if that’s really you either.”

You hummed. “Where do you think I get my power from then?”

His voice was soft but certain when he answered. “Within.”  

Flutters — straight to your core.

“Maybe that makes you more of a sorcerer then,” he pondered, tipping his head towards you. His breath feathered your cheeks, lids heavy over deep chocolate eyes. 

You met them with a breathy chuckle, feeling so girlish all of a sudden. As if suddenly you were not behind the big desk, but a much smaller one. 

The pads of his fingers brushed your arm. So delicately that at first you thought it was just a consequence of their proximity, but when they began to trace tentative, tickling circles, it was evidently intentional. 

You swallowed, your skin beneath his touch like a livewire. Every delicate hair on your arm picking up on the movements of his calloused pads, amplifying them like a radio signal straight to the animal part of you. 

He held you in his gaze, eyes wide like a question. But when the corners of your mouth gave way, gave their soft permission, the corners of his did as well. As did the corners of his eyes, crinkling in that way you loved so much. 

His fingers got braver. The circles widened into strokes. His thumb got involved. Still, you could feel his heart pounding into your shoulder. Feel the nerves emanating from under his touch. Feel the want, the care, the ache, the frustration. 

It might have been seconds. Minutes. A small, stolen eternity.

Until a voice echoed in the hallway. Suddenly there was that question again — triggered like a pinball machine, loud and intrusive as it rattled in your mind. Your eyes shot towards the door. His followed.

Eddie took his arm away, and you wondered if the strangled whine that left your chest was audible to him too.

Silence prickled the space between you, ears attuned to the noise coming closer. Eddie’s eyes were fixed on the door, his strong brows furrowed in what you could only interpret as annoyance. The voices grew louder, then passed, fading into distant echos.

The footsteps left behind an ache. Palpable, pervasive. Eddie sighed and looked at you, to which you could only respond with a resigned huff of your own. You must have looked as pitiful as you felt, because what he did next took you by surprise. It always did, even if this time it was something he had done before.

He reached under the desk and grabbed your hand.

It didn’t matter that he’d held your hand before. It didn’t matter even if he’d held it a hundred times. Your heart still leapt in your chest. The pinballs still fired off inside your head with lights and sound effects. 

But when his warm thumb rubbed circles over your icy knuckles, slow and deliberate, soothing and caring, the sounds got muffled. The flashing dimmed. Until there was nothing but a landscape of bones, and tendons, and the meat of his soft palm. Nothing but the valleys of the space between his fingers when they ventured further than they had ever gone before — in the spaces between yours.

Your back might have arched. Your eyes might have rolled back into your head if you hadn’t closed them so quickly. You wouldn’t know because the only thing you were aware of anymore was the velvet interior of the space between Eddie’s fingers. How they filled the space between yours in a warm, comfortable stretch. 

There was a line and both of you had crossed it. Held hands and jumped over it like a broom. You knew it, he knew it. There was no going back. And knowing this, there was another question you had been asking yourself for the past two weeks — how far would you go?

Would it stop at holding hands? Eddie wasn’t exactly the patient type. You’d spent enough time with him to know that much.  

You opened your eyes to the classroom. Your classroom. To the rows of desks lined up like soldiers. To the chalkboards, and bulletin boards, and concrete walls. To the big desk in front of you. To the open door.

Pinballs again. Ricocheting like thunder. Your pulse in your ears, your stomach in your seat.

You glanced down at your hands intertwined, hidden from sight in the shadow of the large, looming desk. You admired how the heel of his hand cradled yours. How perfectly they fit together. The way your forearm rested against his, warm and soft. How secure it made you feel. There was a tug in your heart, deep and thrumming. You squeezed his hand for one more precious second… and let it go.

“I— I think we should, um,” you swallowed and gingerly shut the monster manual. The ache was back, shooting through your chest like daggers. 

Eddie looked at you, the loss of your hand palpable in the subtle pain of his expression. “Right,” he said plainly. There was a knowing there too, an understanding that replaced it more quickly than you expected. 

He scratched behind his neck with the hand you could still feel the ghost of. “So it’s uh, progress report day.” You could tell by the look in his eyes that he was going somewhere with this.

You raised your eyebrows. “I’m well aware.”

He tipped his head towards you. “I believe we had an agreement.” 

“Oh?”

“You don’t remember?” 

“Remind me.”

Eddie reached into the pocket of the jacket that hung on his seat and procured a paper folded into thirds. “You told me that if I got a B in any of my classes that you would let me read one of your stories.”

Your eyes widened. “I did say that, didn’t I?”

He squinted smugly. “You did.”

You glanced toward your grading binder on the upper lefthand corner of the desk and grabbed it, “If I’m not mistaken though, you have B- in my class,” you said, thumbing through the pages to find fourth period. “Yeah, see?” you pointed to it. “Technically not a B, all those missed assignments from September still count I’m afraid,” your voice was playful.

Eddie’s mouth curled into mischievous little grin as he opened the paper in his hands, “Oh I’m not talking about your class. I believe the agreement was for one class. Any of my classes.” He pointed to a line on the page. “I got a B in shop class.” 

You leaned closer, honing in on the clearly printed B above his finger. “It’s — it’s still not the final report, just a progress report.”

“It’s still an official report,” he said smugly. 

It was almost as if he could see the gears turning in your head, the dread setting into your features.

“See, I’ve kept the promises I’ve made so far,” he brought a hand to his chest, “I think it’s only fair that you make good on yours,” he said, squinting again.

You sighed. “Fine. I’ll bring it in on Wednesday. But… it’s— it’s not totally finished. There’s still quite a bit of editing that needs to be done and—“

“I’m sure it’ll be fine. More than fine. Captivating, actually, if it’s anything like the author.” His smile was tinted with childish excitement. His eyes with a warmth made you shiver.

You tucked your hair behind your ear to distract from the heat creeping into your cheeks. “It’s been forever since I’ve even looked at it to be honest. Years actually.”

“Glad to give you an excuse then.”

______

It was a typical Tuesday night. 

A typical night of the flimsy windows in Gareth’s tidy garage trembling at the raw, unhinged, cranked-up-to-eleven power of Corroded Coffin.

“Hand of Doom” was cleaning up nicely. Dave’s bassline was solid. Gareth’s drums were neat and timely. Jeff was nailing the chord progression. Eddie’s vocals were well equipped to handle Ozzy’s range.

You’re having a good time baby

But that won’t last

Your mind’s all full of things

You’re living too fast

Go out and enjoy yourself

Don’t bottle it in

You need someone to help you

Stick the needle in

There was a perfect balance of space for his vocals to breathe over the walking bassline, then crescendo into pure instrumental power. 

A power he could feel as he attacked the strings. An agency at his fingertips as they tapped out a howling melody over the chugging chords laid out for him by Jeff and Dave, over Gareth’s thundering kick drum. 

A power that could sweep him up and away, carry him far from the crushing weight of the stares of his classmates, far from the looks of disappointment on the faces of the other teachers, far from the heaviness of his feelings.

Swept away in a wave of sound, there was only space in his hindbrain for the patterns his fingers made on the fretboard. For his breath to leave his chest in wailing song. 

The last chord of rung out through Gareth’s garage with a thunderous rattle. 

All four of them looked at each other with smiles and nods. Gareth banged out an extra drum fill. Jeff chugged out approving strums. 

They were ready to take it to the Hideout.

“Nice work, gentleman,” Eddie shouted into the mic, met with whoops and hollers. “I think we’re ready for another, whaddya say, boys?”

More hollers and drum fills.

“How ‘bout Ace of Spades?” offered Jeff.

“No, Symphony of Destruction,” countered Gareth.

Eddie noodled out a mindless melody. “I dunno I’m thinking War Pigs.”

Dave rolled his eyes. “We just did Sabbath, dude.”

“Yeah, we just did Sabbath well,” Eddie pressed.

“Why don’t we do something different, like a Rush song or something?” suggested Dave.

Gareth snorted. “Rush isn’t metal. We’re a metal band, dude.”

Dave rolled his eyes. “Whatever, you couldn’t handle a Rush song anyway.”

“Could too, asswipe. You know what, yeah, let’s do Rush. I wanna see those fat fingers of yours fingers of yours find their way around the bassline,” Gareth laughed.

“Shut up!” Eddie hollered. “Everyone just think about it and we can vote on Saturday. We’ve got like half an hour before we’ve gotta leave anyway.”

“I can’t Saturday, remember? Me and Cindy are going to a movie.”

A low ooh emanated from the guys. 

“What ‘cha end up picking?” asked Jeff.

“Back to the Future. Cindy still hasn’t seen it.” 

Dave balked. “Seriously? Does she live under a rock? It’s been out since like, July, dude.” 

Gareth rolled his eyes. “Yeah, seriously. Cindy doesn’t go to a lot of movies, she’s into like… books and stuff,” he said, a touch of pride colored his voice.

“Ooh so cultured,” Dave taunted.  

“Dude shut up, you’re just jealous ‘cause I have a date. I feel like that’s a good one though, right? I mean it’s got action and a sorta romance but it’s not too serious?”

Jeff shrugged, “Yeah I dunno, do girls like those kinds of movies?”

Gareth gave a puff of air through his nose. “Depends on the girl, they don’t have a hivemind, Jeff.”

Dave snorted. “Like you know anything about girls.”

“More than you!”

Dave rolled his eyes. “You got one date you haven’t even been on yet — doesn’t make you an expert.”

That’s when three of them turned to look at Eddie.

Eddie glanced around nervously, “What?”

“You’ve like… been with girls before, right?” asked Jeff.

Eddie scratched the back of his neck, “Uh, yeah.”

Truthfully, Eddie would hardly consider himself an expert on women. But in a garage full of virgins, his few summer flings would render him one by default.

“Yeah, haven’t you like,” Dave raised his eyebrows suggestively, “Done it?” He gestured with his hands, his index finger moving in and out of the circle he made with his other.

The boys erupted in wheezing cackles.

Eddie snorted. “Yeah I’ve done it,” he said, heat creeping up his neck. 

“Ok then, so like, what should Gareth do on his date?” asked Jeff.

“Yeah what should Gareth do to… you know,” Dave chuckled lewdly.

Gareth scoffed. “Dude I’m not trying to score on the first date. Cindy’s not like that. Besides, I’m not a total sleazeball.”

By Gareth’s definition, Eddie certainly would be. He could count the number of actual dates he’d had on less than one hand. The number of girls he’d slept with on about the same. Actually, it was rare that a date coincided. There was the girl he met at a carnival the summer he turned 17. That was short-lived. Then there was another girl who spent July with her grandma at the trailer park. He was 19 then. They would fool around in the woods outside of Forest Hills before she moved on too. That winter he would meet another at the Hideout, just passing though. She never even called him back. Could he really consider any of them dates?

The boys quarreled amongst themselves and Eddie found his thoughts drifting as they always did — to you. The truth was he had no idea what he was doing. What he did know was how good it felt to be next to you. To touch you. To hear your thoughts on anything at all. To lace his fingers between yours and watch the sigh as it left your body. To pretend that you were his for one stolen moment.

What he did know was that he wanted to take you on a date. Like a real, proper date. He wanted to buy you flowers and open doors for you. He wanted to sit down across from you over dinner, to see your smile in a candlelit glow, to pay for it at the end. 

What he did know was that he’d never felt this way about anyone before. What he also knew was that he could do absolutely none of these things with you in public. 

But he did know what he wanted.

“I dunno, man. Just like, buy her a ticket, get her some popcorn, be a real person,” Eddie offered finally.

“And get a spot in the back of the theater so you can —” Dave turned around, moving his hands up and down his body like he was making out with his bass.

Gareth threw a drumstick at him.

______

It was a typical Tuesday night. 

A typical night of coming home later than you wanted after a pointless faculty meeting.

The breath you took in the crisp air outside the door to your apartment was deep and ragged as you turned the key. You could still feel the tacky chalk on your fingers as you pressed open the door. The echos of the questions you would answer over and over to raised hands still ringing in your mind. The adrenaline still coursing through your chest, tight and constricting. The mask that still weighed heavy on your face.

You shut the door behind you and removed your boots, and the mask.

The sun was going down already. Dim and quiet. Not a single sound for your tired voice to fight anymore.

It was nothing like your house in Indianapolis, the old craftsman bungalow that you had loved so dearly. A real house with character and charm. A kitchen with a big gas stove, and a dishwasher, and  actual counter space. A dining room with a table big enough to host Thanksgiving. 

It was a place would never have been able to afford on your own. Not on your meager teaching salary. Not in a city like that. 

You might have been able to afford something small here in Hawkins, if you’d saved for it long enough. One of those little one-story shoebox homes built in the 50s near the neighborhood you grew up in. But buying a house just felt so permanent. 

You hung your keys on the hook by the door. There was no character in the plain white walls of the entryway. None you could gather in the hall leading past the nook of your kitchen into the wood paneled confines of your living room. No space for a dining room table. 

But the carpet still cradled your aching feet. There were still your records, and posters, and television exactly where you left them. There were still your books overflowing on the meager shelves you were able to squeeze into your bedroom. You couldn’t take the built-in craftsman cabinets with you when you moved. There was a lot you couldn’t take with you, and other things you wished you could have left.

There was one box you hadn’t unpacked yet. It was sitting in your closet, pushed back into the corner under summer dresses and winter coats. It was a box you hadn’t even unpacked at your old place in Indianapolis. One of those boxes that traveled with you from place to place ever since you packed your dorm room up for the final time your senior year. 

Sliding open the slatted wood door, you reached under the clothing and dragged it out into your bedroom. It was not that big, but it was heavy.

You sat cross-legged on the carpet and hooked your fingers under the cardboard, folded in on itself to keep it shut without tape. It took a good tug to untuck one of the panels. Dust powdered the air as it sprung open. 

It was hard to remember the last time you’d opened it, let alone everything that was inside. You sifted through the contents as the memories returned to you.

There were a few notebooks, an old journal, a few Polaroid photos you had forgotten about. Just you and your roommate doing stupid poses, hanging off of the bunk bed you shared like children.

There were many things that were more or less junk. Things that at the time of packing you just couldn’t seem to part with, like an old party hat from your roommate’s 21st birthday — crumpled and creased under the weight of time. You remembered decorating it with her and your other friends at the table in the common room. You all looked ridiculous wearing them on the town, going from bar to bar, your bright colored hats standing out like beacons against the backdrop of the January snow. 

There were other things — a few postcards from friends brave enough to study abroad. A folded world map that once hung in the living room of your first apartment, the one you scrounged for with your best friend. In hindsight it was even smaller than the one you had now, and it had two bedrooms. It felt big to you then. 

That was before you met Dan. 

Before you settled into the craftsman he’d purchased in the historic part of town. Settled into routines and scheduled fancy date nights. Settled into planned family outings and weekends home in Hawkins where he would surprise your mother with news of his promotion at the law firm over dinner. News of the computer he’d purchased for you. News of your engagement.

Before you added more things to the box. Things that didn’t fit into you schedule anymore. Before you’d moved it here.

Before he left behind an ice in you.

There was one thing in the box that you expected to find. It was a black three-ring binder. Unassuming, but most important. 

You cracked it open and stared down at the first page of your novel, quietly bracing yourself for the contents. It had been ages since you’d looked at it. You wondered if the years of separation between the you of the present and the you who wrote it would determine whether it was actually any good or not. In your memory it was. 

You thumbed through the pages, silently critiquing your choice of verbs, your lack of variety in the dialogue tags, how tangibly painful it was for you to set scenes. 

The story was there though. That was the thing that mattered most. The verbs could be changed, better tags could be added, the scenes could be more fleshed out. But the story held water.

Most distinctly of all, you remembered the thrill of writing it. The rush of being flooded with ideas. The hours you would spend in the car that flew by in a vivid daydream on the weekends you visited Hawkins. How every song on the radio seemed to fit the telling of your story. 

There was a dreaming taking root in you again. Yesterday. Now. For the past two weeks. You felt it like the rush of wind that caught your dress as you glided down the hallway. The airy softness that pervaded your thoughts and made you want to dance.

You thought about the last time you felt this way.

The last time you did something for you and only you.

The last time you pursued what it was you really wanted.

______

A/N: You didn’t think I was going to leave Chekov’s unfinished novel sitting on the mantle did you?? ;)

A technical note — the tiefling race wasn’t introduced to the game until 1994 but we’re going to ignore that because I think it’s really fitting for Eddie. :)

As always, I deeply appreciate any and all comments -- keyboard smashing, theories, small novels, all of it. Hearing your reactions to my story fuels me in ways that I can only begin to tell you.

Please reblog and help others to find my precious creation! ✨

Taglist: @mermaidsandcats29 @toxicjayhoo @ooo-protean-ooo @jadequeen88 @wroteclassicaly @kissmyacdc @mantorokk-writes @loveshotzz @newlips @kasbite @trashmouth-richie @carolmunson @wordscomehither @munson-blurbs @blue-mossbird @alottanothing @bebe0701 @latenighttalkingwithgrapejuice @bibieddiesgf @alizztor @godcreatoreli @shotgunhallelujah @ethereal27cereal @munsonsgirl71 @luna-munson83 @eddiemunsonsbitcch @tlclick73 @emxxblog @siriusmuggle @sidthedollface2 @dollalicia @lma1986 @catherinnn @eddiemunson4life420 @readsalot73 @big-ope-vibes @ruby-dragon @ladylilylost @3rriberri @princess-eddie @nightless @eddieswifu @thew0rldsastage @quinnsfineline @chaoticgood-munson @hanahkatexo @eddiemunsonsbedroom @beep-beep-sherlock @emily-roberts @averagemisfit03

[blueesnow]

(10/10) Chill out time ~Welcome to the Antiques~ - LE Event Story Translation (UR Reiji, SR Otoya)

Synopsis: Reiji and Otoya, who were casted to appear in a drama, had to come up with their own ideas for the settings of it, such as what kind of store will they be running for and their roles in the scenario. During that moment, Reiji suddenly remembered about the concerns he had received from his listeners on his radio program regarding their career paths…

Ch 1:

Currently on the radio program recording. Reiji: And the one we listened to just now was "SONG LETTER" by us, QUARTET NIGHT. Reiji: Now then, on to the next one… We'll be reading the letters that we received from everyone~ Reiji: This time we decided to put up "career path" as a theme for the request submission… And oh boy, there were so many that came in. Reiji: And that's why for today, we're going to just showcase a few of them and I'll try my best to reply them! Reiji: Without further ado, we're going to start with our first letter! With radio name, "Rei-chan I love you". Thank you☆ Reiji: "Rei-chan, please listen. I've been rejected by more than 30 companies on my job interviews… Just what exactly should I do?" Reiji: Uh… that's pretty heavy. On to the next one, with "Ebi Mayo-san" who's also asking about job-related concern. Reiji: ”Reiji-san, please help me! I'm the only one who can't decide whether to go get a job or go to college!". This one is also quite a difficult problem. Reiji: And for the last one…is here. With radio name "I want to be healed". Reiji: "I'm having a hard time studying for entrance exam, and I'm worried sick about what would happen if I were to fail.” Reiji: Hmm, I understand how you feel. No matter how hard we try our best, all of the “what ifs” tend to pop into our head. Reiji: Now then… For the three letters that I read just now, they actually have "one thing in common". Did everyone notice it? Reiji: Whether it's about an entrance exam or job hunting, they're both are very tough because they're a major events that affects our life. And the road to getting there is steep and difficult. Reiji: At times like these, I'd think to myself that maybe it's a good idea to take a break if things are really tough and there's just nothing that we can do. Reiji: However, when I looked at all of the letters just now… I can genuinely sense everyone's feelings from it, that they still wanted to try again and do their best. Reiji: And I think having someone supporting you during this time will give you a courage to take a step forward. Reiji: That's why I will continue to support everyone, including ones that I can't read for today too. Reiji: And someday… Once you finally managed to get a vision for the future, then I'd love if you could tell me that during our concert or event. Reiji: Until then, I'll always continue being an idol and wait for you all ♪ - Reiji: And next we'll be airing this song. Good luck, everyone! I'll always be with you!

Ch 2:

-Reiji's Car- Reiji: (There were still quite a lot of letters that I couldn't read during the radio program huh) Reiji: (I guess everyone is more or less concerned about their own career paths~) Reiji: (Hmm…. Is there anything more that I can do for them?) Reiji: (I always received a lot of powers from everyone, and I do wanted to pay them back but) Reiji: Not only just on radio, if I could also cheer them up in some other waysー Reiji: Oh no! I'm too deep in my thought that I didn't even realize it was already this time. Reiji: (Now then, after this I have a meeting for that new drama that was about to start) Reiji: (I've looked over the proposal several times but… it seems like this one might be quite a huge challenge) Reiji: (Not to mention, I'll also be co-starring with Otoyan! This might be quite a lively and fun set☆) -TV Station's Conference Room- Otoya: Oh, Rei-chan! Have you seen the proposal for the drama yet? Otoya: I've been so excited for it. I keep reading them all over and over. Reiji: Oh, that's great~! I can really feel Otoyan's enthusiasm. Otoya: Hehe. But even so, isn't the way this drama being filmed is quite unusual? Reiji: You're right. I've actually been in a lot of projects, including ones from my childhood, but… Reiji: It's my first time to encounter one with this much freedom, so I think this might be quite a good experience for us. Otoya: Yep! As long as Rei-chan's with me in this drama, I believe that we can create something amazing! Reiji: Otoyan… Rei-chan is getting more and more fired up☆ Let's both do our best to make this project successful!

Ch 3:

After the meeting for the drama. Otoya: Hey, Rei-chan. I told you this before but… Otoya: As I thought, isn't this drama just amazing!? It has too much freedom! Reiji: Well~ It was definitely a lot than I expected. And to think that for the settingー Reiji: All that we know is that "we're running a store together" and "we've been friends since teenager"! Reiji: For our roles and what kind of store will it be, we're allowed to decide it by ourselves! Reiji: In fact, they even told us that we could also come up with what kind of scenario will it be if we want to! Reiji: Seriously, this is the first time that I've seen a drama that offer this much freedom. Otoya: Yeah… But on the other hand, it might also help us show and convey our feelings into it. Otoya: When I thought about it, it made me even more motivated! We need to start brainstorming right away! Reiji: Oh, that's the spirit~! You have to be like that if you want to survive in this industry♪ Reiji: …But, although what Otoyan said is true, I think this also came with a pretty big responsibility. Reiji: Depending on the setting and the story that we need to come up, it will affect everything that everyone need to prepare, including the location, the advertisement and the content of the drama. Otoya: Oh, you're right. That means we're going to need a lot of help from everyone around more than the usual drama shooting… Otoya: …But even so, there's this a strong part of me that wants to make this drama fun and enjoyable. Otoya: I'm sure it's going to be a difficult road, but I want to try and give it my all! Reiji: As expected of my Kouhai☆ I knew that Otoyan would say that. Reiji: I also feel the same way! I mean, it'd be such a shame not to enjoy such a wonderful project that was given to us☆ Reiji: This time we'll be working on it right off from the scratch, and surely there'll be a lot of things that we need to think about together but… Once again, please take care of me Otoyan♪ Otoya: Yep! Likewise, I'm in your care too!

Ch 4:

On the way home after the meeting. Reiji: Now then… for the store that we'll be handling for the drama later, what kind of store shall it be? Otoya: Hmm… Now that we're looking around the city, it made me realized that there are actually a lot of different kind of stores. Otoya: A shaved ice shop, a lemonade stand… Oh, a shop that sells out a set menu meal is also delicious! Reiji: *nods* …Wait, all of it was just food-related things! Don't tell me, are you hungry? Reiji: But you're right~ …Maybe an electronics store, a flower shop or a toy store. Oh, a suits tailor store might be interesting too! Otoya: Wow, so stylish! Aa~h, I've never thought of opening up a store by myself until now, so I'm really confused~! Reiji: Ahaha. Don't worry, there's still a little bit of time left before the deadline for the idea submission, so let's think about it carefully together☆ Reiji: (That being said, the stores that we mentioned before weren't all bad but… somehow I feel like we're missing something) Reiji: (Maybe it's because we can't see any convincing reason or vision for why we're running a business?) Reiji: (…Eh? Talking about visionー) Reiji: …That's it. This is similar to everyone's problems! Otoya: Problem? What are you talking about? Reiji: Well, you see. I was on radio recording a while ago, and at that time we were all discussing about everyone's "career path". Reiji: Although there were a bit of minor differences, but all of the people that wrote letter to me were all worried that "they can't see a vision for their future". Reiji: …We ourselves are idols now, but I think each of us had our own reasons for wanting to pursue this career. Reiji: Similarly, there must have been a reason or connection as to why these two characters wanted to open up a store together… Reiji: Maybe it's because we can't see their vision that we can't come up with any ideas at all. What do you think, Otoyan? Otoya: The reason why they wanted to open up a store, huh? I don't think I can think of it straight away… Reiji: Right~ Although I'm the one who bring it up, I also can't come up with any ideas at all. Reiji: If I'm not wrong, our next day off were overlapped together, right? Why don't we go to the different stores at that time and try to think about it? Reiji: I'm sure both of the main characters were also at lost as well. So let's both try to think of it again and be confused together!

Ch 5:

-Downtown- Otoya: Morning, Rei-chan! I know this is early, but there's actually something that I'd like you to hear. Do you have a minute? Reiji: Oh, it looks like you've just thought of something. Come here and let Onii-san hear it? Otoya: Okay! You see, I realized something that might be a hint for us when we're going on a search for a storeー - Reiji: I see… “Think of a store that you would run based on what we both have in common”, huh. Reiji: Nice idea, Otoyan! Very good☆ That way of thinking is perfect for us this time♪ Otoya: Really!? Thank God~ Now then, what would you think will happen if we were to open a bicycle shop? Otoya: We both can ride a bicycle so… What if for the setting, the one thing they have in common is because they were both in the same bicycle club during their highschool? Reiji: Bicycle club, huh… Working up a sweat every day, and sometimes fighting in preparation for competitions… Hmmm, talk about youth☆ Reiji: Ah, wait… if that's the setting, then wouldn't it be more likely for them to aim being a road racer rather than being a bicycle shop owners? Otoya: Whoa, true! That seems even more likely!! Otoya: Looks like we only might be able to manage a store after we retire or something. Sounds like it would be difficult given our age… Reiji: Right. But I have to admit that was actually a pretty good idea. We have a lot of time for today, so let's think of it again more carefully okay☆ -Park- Otoya: We managed to find quite a few good stores, and we also discovered a lot of things that we have in common, but… Otoya: But connecting all of the ideas from there is difficult. *sigh* I'm tired from all of that walking! Reiji: My legs are sore too… Well, it's important to take a breather at times like this, so let's go and take a break somewhere. Reiji: It's just that… It looks like a lot of stores are already on their last order now. Maybe we won't be able to get into any of them. Reiji: Oh well, it can't be helped. For now, let's go find a nearby convenience store and get something to drink or something… Hm? Reiji: (Now that I think about it, isn't this place is actually near that store…) Otoya: What's wrong, Rei-chan? Did you remember something? Reiji: Yep, just a little bit. I'm sure Otoyan will be happy, so look forward to it, okay☆

Ch 6:

-Coffee Shop- Server: Sorry to have kept you waiting. Here's your cream soda and caffè latte, followed by two of our special puddings. Otoya: Wow, it looks so delicious! Oh, the cream soda one is mine. Thank you! Otoya: This combination definitely makes you feel like you're in a coffee shop! It's been a long time since I've had something like this, so I'm excited! Otoya: But Rei-chan, you sure knew a lot of this hidden store. Don't tell me you've actually been here before? Reiji: Yep. When I was at work, a staff member told me about this place and said, "They're open until late, and I highly recommend it.'' Otoya: I see! This place has a relaxing atmosphere, and I really took a liking to it! Otoya: The cream soda too… Mmm, so delicious! Somehow it makes me feel nostalgic. Reiji: Talking about nostalgic, this special pudding is tasty too so come and try it☆ Reiji: It seems to be made in an old-fashioned way, and it's a delicacy that you won't find anywhere else☆ Otoya: Oh, really? Now then, without further ado… Time to dig in! Otoya: Mmm, so yummy! It's as if I'm being healed from all of my tiredness~! Reiji: Right? That's what I thought too when I ate them for the first time♪ Otoya: Now I see why the staff and Rei-chan recommended this place. Everything is all perfect here, and they even open up 'till late too. Otoya: Whether you want to be comforted or refreshed… I'm sure this is a place where all kinds of people will want to come to. Reiji: Yep. In fact, even now, there are people who seem to be on their way home from work and customers who are consulting with the manager about their problems. Reiji: …Talking about consulting though, I also did the same thing too back then with the staff here before haha~ Reiji: You see, sometimes when we got tired of work, worried about our career path, and almost forgot about our dreams and policies. Reiji: At times like that, don't you think it's quite a relief to have a place like this to turn to for comfort? Otoya: I totally get that! Even for idols, that kind of existence is something we want to aspire to…Ah." Reiji: …Otoyan. Perhaps, are you thinking what I'm thinking? Otoya: Yep, totally! The store that we wanted to open isー Reiji & Otoya: A coffee shop!!

Ch 7:

-Cafe Antiques- Ryoji: "Thank you very much. We hope to see you again." Ryoji: "…Now then, Motoya. Once you put away the sign, can you please clean up the table? I'm going to close up the register." Motoya: "Got it! By the way, there were a lot of students here today even though it was a weekday." Ryoji: "Ohh, probably because their exam is coming up soon, I guess? I've seen quite a lot of students were studying too." Motoya: "Now that you mention it, it's already that time of the year, huh. Somehow it reminds me of our old days back then." Ryoji: "You're right… Wait, stop wasting our time and go clean them up quickly! Geez, I can't never let you off the hook." Motoya: "Ehehe, you caught me. Well then, I'm off to clean them up." Ryoji: "Seriously… That guy still hasn't changed since then" Ryoji: "Then again, even though I'm the manager now, I guess I still look the same in the eyes of our regulars." Ryoji: (But, I guess that's okay. To me, protecting this store is the most important thingー) Ryoji: (The first time I came here was when I was in my first year of high school) Ryoji: (Two years later, when my childhood friend Motoya entered high school, I told him about this place and he immediately took a liking to it…) Ryoji: (We used to discuss about our club activities and career paths in this place called "Antiques". We even fought and made up here a couple of times too.) Ryoji: (This place has been around for a long time and our memories only form a small part of it…) Ryoji: (As long as I'm entrusted with the manager's role, I don't want to lose this comfort place where everyone else can turn to. I must absolutely keep it aliveー) Motoya: "..-kun…Ryo-kun!" Ryoji: "Oh, sorry. I was lost in thought. What's wrong?" Motoya: "What do you mean what's wrong? You look like you were thinking of something very important, you didn't even respond to any of my call!" Motoya: "My work is almost done y'know? If you don't do yours soon then I'm going home first" Ryoji: "Sorry sorry. I'll go and finish it right away, so wait for me, okay!"

Ch 8:

After lunchtime is over. Motoya: "Manager! I'm done washing the dishes and cleaning the store. My mission's all complete!" Ryoji: "Thanks. It looks like things have finally settled down here too" Motoya: "By the way… Today was actually busier than I expected" Motoya: "Then again, we have this excellent staff working over here, so we were able to get through it somehow!" Ryoji: "Yeah yeah, excellent excellent. Thank you for another of your brilliant job too for today" Ryoji: "Well then, may I ask this excellent staff here to go out and do some shopping for us? We're running low on our ingredients" Motoya: "Urgh, Ryo-kun is a demon… Uh, nope! Nothing's wrong, Manager! I'll be back!" Ryoji: ”Seriously that guy… Be careful on your way, Motoya! …Now then, time for me to roast the beans I used while I'm at itー" Old Gentleman: "…May I ask one table for one person, please?" Ryoji: "Why of course. Welcome to Cafe Antiques!" Motoya: "Sheeshh~ That surprised me. It started to drizzle all of a sudden…" Ryoji: "Welcome back. What's wrong? Was it raining outside?" Motoya: "Yeah. Just a little bit, when I was on my way back after I'm done shopping. It looks like the rain will be getting stronger from now on, so I guess we probably going to have less customers for tonight" Motoya: "…Huh? Hey, about that person sitting at the back of the room. He has a totally different atmosphere and I can't see his eyes because of his hat, but isn't heー" Ryoji: "Welcome to Cafe Antiques… Hm?" Student who was a regular: "Ryoji-san, Motoya-san… I-I… *sobs*" Motoya: "W-What's wrong? Why are you crying!? …Did something bad happen?"

Ch 9:

Ryoji: (Just like what Motoya said, the rain is getting stronger) Ryoji: (The only customers we have are just a skinny old man who is a newcomer and a student who's a regular in our cafe, huh. Anyway…) Student who was a regular: "*sigh*" Ryoji: (Talk about a big sigh, he look so depressed. …No wait, rather than that, it seems like he's more worried about something) Ryoji: (I've heard that he's been working very hard lately on his studies to pursue his dream but…) Ryoji: (Maybe now he's worried whether the path he wanted to take is really the right one or not, huh) Ryoji: (…I've also been there too before.) Ryoji: (Around the time I started studying for my entrance exam here, Motoya also started working part-time at this store…) Ryoji: (This place has always been very important to us and to the regulars.) Ryoji: (However, after I went to university for a while, the owner was diagnosed with an illness…and I was told that the store would eventually be closed.) Ryoji: (I totally begged him on the spot to not do that and to let me get involved in managing the store in his place.) - Ryoji: (However, as soon as I was given the job and started to study it, I realized just how difficult it was managing a business... I often wondered and worried whether this is truly the best option or not) Ryoji: (I did manage to keep the store running until now but, thinking back of that time, I think part of my recklesness was because I was young) Ryoji: (But still… I don't think Owner knew just how much I was saved by his comfort and drink that he served me at that time depite his ilness) Ryoji: (That's right. Confronting them wholeheartedly, offering them a place of comfort and cheered them up… Those are the things that I wanted to protect the most about this store) Ryoji: (If that's the case then the thing that I can do for now is… Rather than forcing myself to act as Owner, I just have to do things and face them on my own) Ryoji: "…Okay, I've decided. I don't think there'll be any customers coming for a while, so let's do that for today." Motoya: "That? What's wrong, Ryo-kun?" Ryoji: "Motoya, I'll go and take the order from the student, so could you ask the person in the back what he'd like to drink?" Ryoji: "In times like this, I think the best thing that we can do is…providing them an opportunity for some comfort and healing." Ryoji: ”So for today, we're going to treat everyone with a our own personal service."

Ch 10:

Ryoji: "…I see. That must have been painful" Student who was a regular: "Yes… During this time of the year, to think that I got a grade like that on my mock exam. I seriously don't know what exactly should I do…" Ryoji: "I get it. When something suddenly goes wrong in the middle, it's hard to try and take a step forward after that, right" Ryoji: "But you know, there might be a lot of things that you would missed if you never try to to take a chance and walk forward. It's also the same with this store too" Ryoji: "I've told you before the story of how I got appointed as a store manager, right?" Ryoji: "At that time, while I did study in Business Management Major, I actually have zero experience of it" Ryoji: "But… When I heard that this store might be closed for real, I couldn't just stay still…" Ryoji: "I wanted to protect the feelings of Owner and our regular customers… I was convinced that this is what I wanted to do!" Ryoji: "All the people around me told me that I was reckless and told me to quit before I regret it. At first try, I encountered problems and worried a lot but…" Ryoji: "I'm really glad that I actually took a step forward on that day. And I still am even now" Ryoji: "Although it maybe different for each people… As long as you try, I'm sure there'll be an answer coming to you. This world is surprisingly like that you see" Ryoji: "Getting worried means that you're feeling lost now, right? …Just like how I was back then, don't you have something that you really wanted to do?" Ryoji: "And besides, there's more than one way to make your dreams come true. So, before you decide to take the next step and quit…please try to think about it one more time.” - Student who was a regular: "Ryoji-san, Motoya-san. Thank you so much for today. I… As I though, I'm going to continue to walk through the path that I believe in a little bit more!" Ryoji: "Yeah, we'll be here waiting for the good news." Motoya: "We look forward to see you again! Good luck, okay!" Ryoji: "…His expression look much more better now. I can't wait to see his growth" Motoya: "Yep. And besides, Ryo-kun too, you really feel like a real manager just now. Wait no, you look more like a master~!" Ryoji: "Nah, I still have a long way to go. This time I was only able to make use of my experience but, there are still a lot of things that I need to learnー" Old Gentleman: "Hahaha, there's no one who is perfect from the very start. Thank you for the wonderful show you showed me back then, it was more fulfilling than the supplementary drink" Ryoji: "Y-You saw us. My apologies for showing you such a sight" Motoya: "It's just as I thought! Hey Owner, don't you think that Ryo-kun's finally getting the hang of it as a manager?" Ryoji: "Owner? What are you saying…" Ryoji: (Eh? But wait. The hat that he's wearing… and besides that way of laughing, don't tell me!?) Owner: "Although I'm getting better now, I've lost a lot of weight because of my illness. It's only natural that you can barely recognize me" Ryoji: "I-I'm so sorry for not noticing you sooner! It's been a while, Owner…!" Owner: "Don't worry about it. In fact, I actually wanted to thank you for today. My surgery has been decided you see, and I've been feeling anxious about it…" Owner: "But knowing that my precious "Antiques" is still here really cheered me up. And maybe with this, I can finally move forward" Ryoji: "Owner…thank you very much! I'm honored to hear you say that." Ryoji: "We will continue to protect "Antiques" so that it can be a place of relaxation for everyone." Ryoji: "But, we're not only just going protect it. At the same time, we want to provide everyone a comfort drink in our very own way for them to relax… That's what I thought now" Owner: "…That's fine. I'm glad to have you as my successor, Ryoji-kun. Next time, I'll be looking forward to taste your very own personal drink" Ryoji: "Yes, gladly! …Come on, Motoya. Let's go and see our precious customer off" Ryoji & Motoya: "Thank you for coming today. We look forward to seeing you again!"

[frostycatblr-fandom-files]

NFITH Chapter 1 - New Territory [Commander Fox x Fem!Reader]

Warnings and Information: New to Coruscant and adjusting horribly to your new job as a senator’s aide, you often find yourself lost on the best of days, and the target of her wrath on the worst of them. You could almost swear she’s setting you up to fail as your job standards become more and more impossible. Fortunately for you, you have someone in high places looking out for you before long.  Second Person POV, undescribed Fem!Reader, save for *very occasional* mentions of makeup. Establishing chapter where Reader moves to Coruscant for intentionally vague reasons. Reader does not meet Fox in this chapter. Reader has a very helpful neighbor. This series contains depictions of anxiety and panic attacks. Star Wars and real-world swearing. Narrative and stylistic use of italics. 

Word count: 2,748

New Territory

Moving to the centermost jewel of the Core Worlds for a career change was an impulsive decision spurred on by the start of the Clone Wars some time ago. Feelings of great uncertainty for your future in this developing chapter of your life became a dragging, tugging weight you could no longer ignore. What once provided anchorage to keep you stable and sure threatened to drown you in the ever-shifting tide if you did not rid yourself of these hindrances. 

Something new was waiting for you on Coruscant, the city that never sleeps. You just wouldn’t be sure until you got there.

Loved ones had rallied around you when you made preparations for the plunge, showing you support and lending a helping hand in packing most of your life away in tidy little boxes and crates. It proved easy with their help. You truly couldn’t have done it without them. Choosing cherished items to leave behind was no walk in the park, but it was easier than what would come next. 

The fretful farewells and yawning maw of a whole new galactic timezone between you and your loved ones were bitter pills to swallow. The first coils of dread pooled in your stomach upon the drop out of hyperspace, slowly gnawing away all the while as you met up with the moving company in the early afternoon.

Getting the keycards and address to your new Coruscanti apartment marked the start of an aching loneliness. 

There was no one to stand behind you in silent support when the new neighbors came sniffing around at the sight of the moving company, leaving you to greet them on your own. None of the bittersweet laughter that lovingly tucked your holoalbums in boxes accompanied you when it came time to unpack them. No one would help you decide where you should put your travel-wilted houseplants when you introduced a little greenery, something to fill up the empty space. 

(The corner would have to do for now.)

Dinner was eaten alone. 

Too travel-tired, and the whole of your body aching at the thought of a few minutes more on your feet after a busy afternoon of scattered unpacking, you purchased something from one of the many street vendors just outside the complex. 

The signage was not in Galactic Basic, but thankfully, the Dug vendor knew enough to provide “something filling” when you asked. Anything would do so long as it took the claws of the gripping hunger and filed them down. Credits changed hands for a carton of breaded nuna nuggets in a vegetable and grain blend, which was taken back upstairs and enjoyed quietly in the solitude of your kitchen for a moment, just savoring the flavor of your first meal on a new planet. 

To disrupt the unfamiliar room tone, you eventually tune in to a radio drama for the first in a long time. Something to fill up your apartment with a little more sound until you’re ready to unpack a final box or two for the night, then head to bed. The script’s corny and amateurish quality has you reconsider that idea pretty quickly. 

The longer you listen, the more it sounds like an office drama, complete with catty watercooler talk and power tripping micromanagers. 

Pass.

You turn it off and put the rest of your meal in the conservator for tomorrow.

You make just enough progress on a pair of boxes before you’re content both with the day’s progress and the prospect of finally getting some shut-eye. 

Leaving the process of wrestling your mattress in place when you’re running on fumes likely wasn’t the best idea, but it should serve its purpose for draining the remainder of whatever energy reserves you have. Once settled in the bed frame, extracting your bed linens and dressing things up is all that’s left before your nightly routine, and finally, sleep. Fixing the mattress cover and fitted sheet in place takes the most time, the rest proves a breeze. 

The new sleeping space is capped off with final addition of the comforter. A loved one packed your sleep set in the same box as the bed linens, meaning you don’t have to sleep in the day’s now-dirty clothes, or dig through any more boxes. 

It smells like home. 

And it’s the first time you sit here—truly sit here—in the newness and the unfamiliar of what you’ve gotten yourself into… and struggle not to cry. You deny the brine-water in your eyes its purpose, wiping and washing everything down the sink drain instead. The cold creepings of loneliness and regret are placated with self-soothing nonsense. 

You’re just tired. There was a lot of information to process today. Everyone feels completely overwhelmed their first day on Coruscant. 

It could easily be the first of many days… 

Finally reclining in bed, you find it hard to sleep now that there’s nothing else to occupy your mind with, taking notice how full of sound this foreign environment is. Understanding this planet is one massive, incomprehensible city, it’s easy to see why rather than the occasional, irregular sound, the noise pollution will be constant, coming from countless sources.  

The hummed harmonies of neon signs glowing in the smog. A million skylanes warbling and purring with speeder cabs in every color of the light spectrum. The steady, endless drum of foot traffic on a million and one walkways. The voices of trillions of galactic lifeforms living above and below the surface; all parading around on the planet that never sleeps. 

Sleep eludes you all night, or proves restless when you wink out of consciousness, however temporarily.

Your neighbor from down the hall is not surprised to see you propped up in the doorframe, folding over in exhaustion when you answer the door just before mid-morning. You force drooping eyelids back in place, praying this is a quick matter as you greet the elderly woman perched on your welcome mat next to a large bag. 

You were in the process of sniffing out which of the many boxes filled with kitchenware contained your caf machine so you could brew yourself a cup of much-needed energy when there was a knock at your door. 

“Can I help you…?”

She was Tholothian, judging by the scaled skullcap and tendrils that bobbled over her shoulders from the force of the gentle, bubbly laugh she breaks into in her amusement. 

“Oh no, dear; I’m here to help you. May I come in?” 

Her smile is warm, and kind; emphasized and complemented by both smile and age lines. You’re pretty sure you saw her the other day when the movers brought in the first of the boxes, but you can’t remember a name.

Figuring there’s no harm, you invite her inside, at which point she collects the sizable bag at her feet and finds a way to gracefully squeeze it past you without so much as a bumped elbow. “Do you… need any help with that?” The offer to help is made only after the moment has passed, brain sluggish and more than a little forgetful of your manners. 

Fortunately, she’s forgiving of the situation before her. “I’m plenty strong in my old age, don’t you worry! Got up nice and early this morning to get some things that’ll help you settle in. Groceries, too.” 

No longer quite sleepy, you now stand there, stunned. “You- you brought me groceries?”

With a smile, she hoists the bag a little higher than before. “I sure did. Where would you like me to put everything, dear?”

“T-the counters in the kitchen’s fine…” you stammer. 

Your neighbor brings the grocery-laden bag into the apartment’s small kitchen, and lines everything up on the countertop as you instructed. Blue milk, a loaf of polystarch, eggs, caf creamer, and generic breakfast mixes are among the lot. 

“Here you are! A few essentials to get you started.” Previously crammed in one singular bag, there are now fifty or so items to be put away. (That’s a few?)

You would be speechless if it wasn’t the polite thing to thank her. 

“I, uh… h-holy shit, thank you.”

“You’re welcome, sweetheart.” she replies cheerily. “Mrs. Helios is always here for her neighbors. I’m just a knock away down the hall in ol’ 4546Besh if you ever need me.”

Mrs. Helios. Tholothian. 4546Besh. 

You could remember that. (Probably.) You properly introduce yourself while the two of you begin putting away the perishables first, the conservator and cupboards looking a little less barren than before. (And she thinks you have a lovely name; says it suits you.) Keeping up the momentum, the boxes of kitchenware previously poked through for the caf-maker are tackled next, at Mrs. Helios’ offering.

“You look like you could use a hand.” she says with a knowing smile. 

“I would certainly appreciate it…” you say, not for the first time. 

Steady progress is made over the next half hour or so until the beverage machine has been located, at which point you dig only long enough to find the caf powder and a suitable mug before the Tholothian encourages you to have a rest. Mrs. Helios takes the opportunity to present you with a few more things out of her bag while you wait on your cup to brew. 

The first is a sound device, the price sticker subjected to some rather thorough redacting of monetary value. The packaging is pretty nondescript, save for a few lofty promises—over 150+ new and improved audio files!—but the machine itself has a rather nice, sleek design when you extract it from the box. Coincidentally, it happens to be in a softer shade of one of your favorite colors. 

“It may help mask some of the... less pleasant ambience you’ll find here.” 

Her reasoning sagely segues into the next item, handwritten advice on how to deal with the high amount of crime and the pickpockets that plague the planet. The stack of hair-thin acrylic sheets must be half an inch tall, and again, handwritten. Each letter is crisp, with a print-like quality to it. It must’ve taken her several hours to write this much, and so tidily.

You’re kind of at a loss for words. You’re wondering if you’ve made a terrible mistake uprooting your comfortable life to live here.

“Just how bad is the crime?”

“It’s not so bad here on the upper levels, dear. Biggest concern would be pickpockets, day to day. But the sub-levels; now those areas you’d really need to take care of yourself.” Mrs. Helios understands that's not much comfort, so the subject is changed for now while you fetch the finished cup of caf. (You set another to percolate for good measure; you’ll likely take it for yourself if Mrs. Helios declines.) “Speaking of upper levels… I also wrote down a few of the good shops not too far from here that you may find helpful as you're settling in. Nice variety, and all that.” 

You take the first of the pages and study its directions, telling you how many turns to take, nearby signage, types of shops you should be seeing along the way. She’s thought of everything. Mrs. Helios has made a point to include the name and species of the shop-owners, and the languages they speak as well.

Nursing your caf, you select a passage at random. 

Hasher (Dug) speaks Basic, but be sure to greet him in Huttese first. The word ‘Hello’ is ‘Achuta’. 

“You must be pretty familiar with these shop owners.” 

“I’ve been doing business with them for years,” Mrs. Helios confirms, head bobbing. 

Though the two of you had proper introductions little more than an hour ago (if the chronometer is to be believed), the elderly Tholothian has given you the impression she’ll answer any question with honesty. She’s given no reason for you to suspect otherwise so far, anyway. 

“Are they… friendly?”

Mrs. Helios has given you an ace up your sleeve, and she knows it. “They should be! If they aren’t, telling ‘em Mrs. Helios sent you their way ought to remind them of their manners. I won’t tolerate them being unkind to my neighbors just because I’ve known them for years.” Reaching across the small table, she takes your hand and gives your forearm a gentle but reassuring pat. “You’ll find your footing here in no time, dearie. Don’t you worry.” Her smile lines deepen, and her tone is full of confidence. 

“I hope so…” you reply, sleepy in your optimism.

Not much later, the caf-pot indicates the second cup you’ve set to brew has finished, strengthening the robust aroma wafting through your tiny apartment kitchen. Getting up, you collect the mug full of bitter brew and offer it up to your new neighbor, asking if she’d like some sugar or cream to sweeten it. You should have thought to do the same with your own, but you’d been so desperate for a stimulant after a near-sleepless night that you only waited long enough for it to cool to a more comfortable temperature, at which point it was drunk straight. 

“Oh, that’s a very kind offer, but I’m afraid caf and I don’t agree with one another. I suspect I’m mildly allergic to caffeine; always seem to break out in hives after a cup. You go ahead and have it for me, dear.” Mrs. Helios encourages you. She promises there’s no sense worrying about the possibility of a contact allergy, either. More than one broken cup of caf has been cleaned by her thin fingers throughout her lifetime without ill effect. 

That brings up many questions, she’s all too sure, but you’ll have to find your answers another time. 

“Judging from the amount of boxes, you’re planning to be here for a while. There will be plenty of time to get to know one another better.”

“I came to Coruscant for a career change.” you confess, stirring in a few spoonfuls of sugar into the second cup of caf. “So I hope that’s true.” 

The Tholothian’s expression quickly becomes one of mild interest. “Is that so? And do you have a career lined up for you already?” Interest morphs into gentle disapproval and concern when you tell her there’s no new job lined up yet. “Oh good galaxies, child. That won’t do at all… Coruscant can be such an expensive place to live. Well. In that case, I ought to give you some directions to the nearby career centers before long. You deserve a little time to settle in, first.”

First groceries, then a noise machine and a sizable stack of hand-written advice. Now Mrs. Helios is offering to help you find resources to pick up a new career. You must have accrued and cashed in some seriously good karma or something to have such a helpful neighbor just down the hall. It almost feels too good to be true. You know your family would be as relieved as you are grateful to have met someone so generous and helpful so shortly after moving to Coruscant. 

“Stars, I… I don’t know how to possibly thank you enough, Mrs. Helios...” 

Your neighbor smiles, humored, as she begins gathering her things. She’s taken enough of your time for the day; ought to be on her way and let you get back to setting your apartment in order at your leisure. Boxes that have piled up in the joint search of the caf-maker are kicked aside, helping her get to the door unencumbered. 

“Settle in first. Then you can fuss about thanking me,” the Tholothian tells you with a matronly smile and a deciding nod. “But there’s no pressure. This is new territory for you, dear. Your story is just getting started.”

That’s certainly one way to look at it. “Yeah… I guess you’re right.” you agree softly, returning her pleasant smile. Her words are simple, but so very comforting. You linger at the door, waiting until Mrs. Helios makes it down to 4546Besh before slipping back inside your own apartment with a departing wave. 

She’s absolutely right. 

The day is still young, and with the caf in your system, you should be able to make decent work on emptying these moving boxes if you work in waves. Your first night was rough, but it’s behind you now. Given an incredible leg up by your generous neighbor, tonight should be better. 

And tomorrow, you’ll start properly exploring the planet at the heart of the Galactic Republic.

Starting out this series on the small-side for chapters; be warned that future chapters will (likely) be on the longer end going forward!

Fic taglist: @dukeoftheblackstar @dystopicjumpsuit @msmeredithrose @lonely-day3636 @returnofthepineapple

[Masterlist] [NFITH Masterlist] [Taglist] [Requests: OPEN]

[klausysworld]

hi lovely, loving your writing as always 🫶🏻🫶🏻, i was just wondering if you’d write something a little different. Just an idea that came to mind, which is Y/N a previous ex Klaus or someone of the TVD men have mistreated. Traumatised and heartbroken, Y/N moves to a new city and starts a whole new life. A year later, Klaus and the Tvd gang at different locations (klaus = new orleans) (damon = new york) etc are listening to the same music channel, all of a sudden a familiar voice starts playing on the radio- it’s Miss Y/N, the newly and all so talented pop star.

Completely understandable if you’re not into this, it is different and doesn’t seem to be your theme. If you do do it then great, if not great 🤭lotta love for you and your writing.🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

(Gonna be a lot of jumping to different people but will remain in third person throughout)

She Did It

Y/n hadn’t had the smoothest ride to success.

Growing up in Mystic Falls Virginia was just the start of the rocky road known as life.

Being tangled in the supernatural drama as a result of being Elena, Bonnie and Carolines best friend was a whole other trip.

Falling for a toxic original hybrid that doesn’t know how to love hit her hard.

Being used whether it be for leverage in a life and death situation or for her body, she never had it easy.

Losing so many of her friends as a result only made it worse.

Him cheating on her and getting a werewolf pregnant was the straw on the camels back.

But if we’re being honest it was probably the best thing that could have happened. She was free to do whatever the fuck she wanted.

So she graduated, and got the hell out of that town so fast not even a tribrid could catch her.

Y/n went of the grid for nearly 4 years before she was heard from…or of again.

———————————————————————

(New York-Damon and Elena Salvatore)

It was a hot summers day in the city that never sleeps, Damon and Elena stood on the balcony of their apartment in the sun with the radio playing.

Damon stood by the barbecue flipping the burgers while Elena overlook the city. Only happy thoughts in her mind as she tapped her nails along the beat of the song that played.

Damons face twisted into one of recognition and slight confusion as he turned to Elena

“Have we heard this song already?” He asked trying to remember what had already played

“No I think it’s new, why?” Elena hums dismissively

“It sounds oddly familiar” he murmurs

Elena listens a little better and pays attention to the voice, her slight accent peeking through her words and the husk in her tone at certain points throughout. Her brows went up and she slowly stood, her hand moved to turn it up and a smile began to spread across her face

“What is it?” Damon asked confused

“Y/n” Elena stated with a growing grin “Y/n is singing” she projected “oh my god! Oh my god get the phone! Call Caroline right now!”

———————————————————————

(Boston-Caroline Forbes and Bonnie Bennet)

Both girls smiled as they saw Elena’s name appear on Care’s phone.

Caroline picked up and put her on speaker

“Hey Elena, how’s New Yorkk??” Care asked cheerfully

“Caroline turn on the radio right now! You won’t believe who’s singing!” Elena nearly yelled down the phone. Bonnie furrowed her brows but ran on over to the radio and turned it on.

Their faces light up within seconds of eachother as Bonnie whispered an “oh my god”

“She did it” Caroline uttered, her hand going over her mouth “she freaking did it!” She yelled ready to jump up and down. Both her and Bonnie were hugging in excitement as they listened to their old best friend pour her heart and soul into only 4 minutes of passion.

———————————————————————

(New Orleans-Klaus and Rebekah Mikaelson)

Klaus had frozen in step when he heard Rebekah singing along to a very familiar voice.

He stood in the door way staring amazed at the speaker that blasted her voice before the radio presenter chimed it

“And that was miss y/n’s newest big hit, it would seem she just keeps hitting the charts, last week she knocked out her own number one with another” the guy announced making Klaus take a step inside. His jaw went slack as he listened to the people praise her music and the meaning behind her songs. “I’m excited for her interview tomorrow morning” they continued

Rebekah noticed Klaus’s face and smirked “didn’t know she was basically a superstar?” She asked amused and he shook her head “she’s literally everywhere at the moment! How have you not heard her!?” She questioned with a laugh but he only blinked dumbfounded.

Klaus stood for several more songs until eventually leaving and sitting in his own room with his headphones blaring.

———————————————————————

(California-Y/n’s interview on TV).

Interviewer is in italics & Y/n is normal text

Y/n’s smile was big as she sat down opposite her interviewer. The cameras focused on her, she truly looked flawless.

“You look lovely this morning” the presenter greeted, sitting up straight in his chair as she grinned in excitement at him

“Thank you, you do to of course” she responded politely and he smiled

“I don’t want to come on too head on but god everyone is just dying to know, ‘who is y/n y/l/n!?’” He questioned leaning toward her eagerly making her laugh lightly

“No no it’s fine, straight to the point” she began “well I mean, it’s sort of a long story but I always had the dream and aspiration to become a singer and one day something just happened and it made me realise that it would only ever be a dream if I didn’t actually go for it” she explained and the man nodded

“Surely it’s more complicated than that?” He questioned

“No yeah of course, I mean I went to so many different places. I’ve sang in bars, i’ve been a busker on the streets of Chicago, i’ve had producers turn me away and auditions gone wrong. I’ve choked a few times and just had a lot of self doubt toward earlier years. It took like three years to get here, and of course that is like really freaking fast when you think about it because some people are trying for so long and get nowhere. I guess it was partly luck. I prefer to thank the public, I mostly got recognition from people posing me on social media and then bigger people approached me from there” she told him in more detail

“You are a role model to so many young women, you’ve proved to be incredibly resilient and ambitious. Your talent has gotten you so far, you’re already making songs with other huge stars” he stated with a look for her to confirm his words

She nodded and her smile grew

“I’m actually um, flying up to Michigan, Detroit next week, I’m producing a song slash rap with Marshal, well Eminem” she confirms and the cameras flash on her face

“So we should all be expecting a new phenomenon to be created” he question, his hands rubbing together

“I mean it’s Eminem, he hasn’t failed yet” she laughed

“And seeing the other people you’ve already sang with, you shouldn’t be any trouble, fans are truly over the moon to hear the both of you together” he adds

“Yeah, I mean, I’m incredibly excited as well obviously. I’m actually making up a collaborations album, I’ve already recorded some of the tracks on there with uh Taylor Swift and Lana del rey, then I’m with Eminem next week and some time down the line I have a meeting with Billie Eilish and her team and a couple other people but I wanna keep some surprises for the future”

The interviewer nodded along with what she said and leaned back in his seat

“Within very minimal years you have become such a huge success, what are your plans for the future?”

“Well I’m not overly sure to be honest. I know that I want to tour. I’ve done like a couple festivals and a few bigger events but I want to make my way around the states and eventually get out of America you know? I want to go world wide, I’ve actually already got a lot of requests to come to other countries but I need to do states first, see how much I make and how expensive a world tour will actually be”

Each person from her past watched snd listened to everything she said in that interview.

They all listened to the album she had already released and were all eager for her to create a collaborations one.

In some ways it was unbelievable but really, they all knew she was capable.

(I wanted this to focus more on the happiness that they all felt for her finally having her dreams rather than it being all about the past)

(Hope this was sort of what you wanted??? Im not gonna lie I have made up so so so many like fake scenarios in my head with basically this plot😭😭 I always end dating young Eminem and Klaus is all depressed cuz he wants me back. Basically I’m just a very sad being with little to no social life 😬)

[smahell]

otaku fm sinful sounds - the disappointing reply to the fans' outcry.

this morning i wake up to a notification from the obey me! official channel - a new otaku fm episode? celebrations. fantastic. i'd been waiting ever since i saw a photo of kada and yamashita back in the iconic studio. we hadn't received a new otaku fm episode for roughly two years, and of course, when a new one is announced there's going to be expectations surrounding that. expectations that will originate from the previous seasons and episodes.

so after watching the one which came out today, i was just genuinely disappointed.

"that's it?? that's the episode?"

you might even notice that the episode doesn't stay loyal to its usual 35-45 minutes format. in fact, anime and chill had the longest episodes, and is what I'd call "peak obey me™". these episodes are half that length. and i'm expecting the newer ones to be even shorter.

sinful sounds (ss).. was never advertised to be as short as almost the otaku fm mini series with the side character's vas-

even worse? the twenty minute time frame was meant to be shorter. they went overtime.

i'd totally understand if it was labelled 'otaku fm mini - sinful sounds', but this was meant to be a return to formula. with the abundance of paid content coming from solmare recently, this was meant to be something that those without dispensable income could actually enjoy. yes, it was also stated that listening to the asmr would "make the episode that much better", but assuming that i'd enjoy it regardless is an overstatement. whether you listened to the audio drama or not, this was just a disappointing way of coercing people who don't use twitter to listen to it. and another disappointing reminder of what obey me has become.

be warned - i talk about the actual episode here. so maybe go listen to it first before reading on.

yes, hearing the voice actors come back.. of course i'd love that. that's one of the main reasons i wanted it to come back. they even acknowledge how long it's been since the last time they did, but then it goes straight into "what is ASMR??"

like.. the fanbase is full of deluded white women /j .. i think we all know what it is!!! i guess it's helpful nonetheless, but then they're like:

"let's listen to a clip!!!"

hey...what?!?

(and said clip takes up a good chunk of the episode..)

my point is.. it's not really them gisting about anything. the whole thing just feels scripted and stiff. i don't feel that liveliness that i feel from rewatching previous episodes. sure, yes, asmr is meant to be calming and relaxing.. but that's not what i think of otaku fm. they're spoonfeeding me a product like it's baby food.

it's just a 20 minute ad. really.

some could say "well duh, that was the point of otaku fm, to advertise obey me and give more fan content!!"

then tell me, genuinely. did this episode give you any fan content of the vas or character that you've either already heard before OR content that really satiated you.

let's use anime and chill as an example. the anime and chill series was made to advertise the anime, but they didn't spend all the time talking about it. and you didn't exactly need to have the money to watch the anime to enjoy the whole thing. the voice actors themselves are performers. they're used to taking the reins on a project and creating an entertaining experience, which is why even though a segment is based on asking one question, we learn so much about them on a personal level. if a radio episode can make me feel like i'm chatting with two friends, then its done its job. this episode felt like watching two unskippable ads in a row on youtube. end me.

for me it's bringing up the question - all this paid content might just turning more fans away rather than bringing more in. i'm suspecting they've ben losing money since the decline in popularity after lockdown.

it's just making me think, well, five years in the future, will obey me as a game even survive? because trust me, after this disappointing episode, i'm starting to turn to ex and bee as my lord and saviour.

this isn't a diss at the voice actors at all. they were told and paid to do this, and they've done it perfectly well. this is more at a poke at the higher up executives calling the shots for this. because it always is- /hj

think i'm the only one who hates it? read this other post from another person on youtube who's also another avid fan of the voice actors. i might be repeating one or two of their points, but i saw this before i ever listened to ss, and trust me, it was a red flag for what was to come.

again, i'm not making this post because "arghhh i hate solmare i hate the vas".. no. i'm doing this because i can see that in another universe, this new series could've been amazing. it just falls flat. and i feel like it will continue falling flat until the developers and higher-ups behind this game acknowledge the scraps and and shreds of a fanbase the game has left.. i'm disappointed.

before you even begin praise this episode, listen to every single episode featuring sumi shinya, miura ayme, and/or takuhei yamamoto, laugh your heart out, then come back to this post. and mourn what has been taken from you.

[weyounpussyindulgence]

Here, have some Dr East headcanons I came up with over the years

💚💚💚💚

- I have no clue how real Zoanoid names work, but I feel like he’d use the name Henry as a part of his nom de plume. Something like Henry B. East

- He collects bizarre/silly neckties. The more peculiar and novelty the design, the better

- Even though he’s the head of CHRONOS’ Genetics Department, he doesn’t get the respect he deserves from Balcus or the other Zoanoids. Lisker, Ramsey, Striker and Weber have shoved him into a locker and stuck his head in a toilet many times

- He’s bisexual. Look at his interaction with Dr. Gordon and tell me that they haven’t explored each other’s bodies at least once

- He’s primarily a carnivore, but eats a lot of pre-made salad kits and fruits. His favorite mixes are chicken ceaser, avocado ranch with bacon, and his favorite fruits are apples, dragonfruit and nectarines

- Speaking of carnivorous, I have no clue if this is canon in the manga or not, but I feel like Zoanoids eat humans. So when he’s getting his apartment broken into or something, he turns into his goat monster form and will eat the burglar

- I feel like he listens to a lot of classical music because it helps him relax and focus. He also listens to old science fiction radio dramas like the Twilight Zone radio dramas, X Minus One and Ray Bradbury Theatre.

- He keeps a goldfish as a pet since they don’t have a huge attention span, so it won’t pay any attention if he changes form

- Sometimes when he laughs, he bleats like a goat. He gets very insecure about it though because he’s been mocked for it

- He’s lactose intolerant. Idk how else to elaborate, it just makes sense to me. It’s not life threatening or anything, but it does cause him a lot of tummy trouble

- Also speaking of tummy trouble, I firmly believe that with the superior technology the Zoanoids have at CHRONOS, he never died from being gutted from the inside. Dr Gordon was able to patch him up and do some organ transplants. Then they kept him on life support until he woke up from a 30 day coma/recovery period (he has a big scar on his lower chest and stomach from it though). He then resigned and collected a severance package and now lives a happy semi normal life somewhere off the grid safe from the Guyver

[skittlesfics]

name: and if we should see the stars...

pairing: Eddie Munson x AFAB!Reader

word count: 2175

summary: Eddie shows you the stars

content/warnings: mutual pining, sexual tension, fingering, friends to lovers, Eddie calls reader princess and baby, reader has a vagina

author's note: SO I started writing this a week or two ago, and my entire plot bears some striking similarities to one scene from @upsidedownwithsteve's Camp AU Eddie fic that was posted yesterday. I honestly considered not posting at all because anons love drama where there is none, but honestly I worked really hard on this one and I'm happy with how it came out. Go read that fic right now if you haven't, it's absolutely stunning and gorgeous in every way and deserves all of your attention.

-

There was love, and then there was whatever this was: sitting in the back of Eddie’s van drinking shitty beers with the back doors wide open and the radio turned down low. It was something sweeter, something unspoken that you could keep wholly to yourself.

He was so casual with his touches, one arm thrown around your shoulder, leaning in close to try and match your perspective. The chain he wore around his wrist was cold against your neck, but you were running so hot with him this close that it was a balm against the burn of him.

“D’you see that one princess?” He was pointing, but your gaze didn’t make it past his hand. The pretty calloused fingers, the rings shining on his knuckles, the flaked polish on his nails where he’s chewed and picked at them since the last time you painted them for him.

“Mmhmm.” You lied anyway. Who could look at the stars when the sun was this close? He burned so bright, so bright, you didn’t know how to look away. You didn’t want to know how.

“I’m pretty sure that’s Orion’s belt.” He traced the stars like he could touch them. You thought they’d move for him, if he wanted them to. Eddie was special that way.

“Just his belt?” You were barely aware of what you were asking. You just wanted for him to keep talking in that excited timbre. He was so pretty when he got passionate about something.

“The rest of him is there too, if you look. It’s a little harder, but if you lean this way…” He trailed off, shifting to make room for you to see and then frowning when you didn’t manage to get quite where he wanted you. He huffed. “C’mere.”

That’s all the warning you got before he propped his beer against a threadbare blanket and hauled you between his legs like it was the most natural thing in the world. For Eddie, maybe it was. For you? You were already burning for him, and the press of his chest against your back set you ablaze.

If he noticed your pulse quicken as he slid on arm around your waist, leaning forward to rest his chin on your shoulder, he didn’t say anything.

“So those three are the belt.” He pointed to the same spot again. His voice reverberated through your body, that close, and it was unfair of him to expect you to do anything other than listen.

“The bright ones?” It was a strain, but you did your best to find them in the wide expanse of the sky. He was right to move you. It was easier to find them, even though your mind was hardly on the task.

“That’s it, princess. So, if you draw two lines down to that star and that star, that makes his legs.”

You tried and failed to visualize it. Instead, your brain stuttered and got stuck on how different it sounded when Eddie called you princess while you were sitting in between his legs, with the warm press of his thighs boxing you in, with his mouth right next to your ear. You had to shut down the thoughts that followed, particularly the ones that started with his hand that was still resting casually on your waist, two fingers just skimming the exposed skin where your shirt had ridden up.

“A-and the rest of him?” Your voice shook as Eddie’s hand on your waist shifted, his fingers brushing more solidly against your exposed skin, raising gooseflesh in their wake.

If he noticed what he was doing, he was playing it cool. Cooler than you, at least, as he gestured again with his free hand, tracing a few more stars that you could barely separate from the tapestry of the night sky.

“That’s his body. He doesn’t really have a head.” He explained it like your mind could be on the stars when he was tracing constellations into your skin, never one to be still. You wanted to protest, to tell him how unfair it was to expect you to learn when he was touching you; when he was so close that your whole world was leather and smoke and Impulse deodorant that shouldn’t smell good on him but did anyway.

You tried desperately to think of a question to keep the conversation. It needed to be something clever, that would turn the focus away from the way you press your thighs together for friction.  Eddie spoke first, however, his voice low and teasing in your ear.

“You’re not even listening, Princess.” He laughed, the sound so full and dark that it made you shiver. There’s no hiding that when he had you pulled against him bodily, his fingers dipping more brazenly into the waistband of your skirt.

“’s not true!” You protested, “I just can’t see them the way you can.”

Eddie couldn’t care less if you could make out the constellation or not. He was playing a game of chicken against himself, tracing the waistband of your skirt and then dipping one finger down, then two, drawing a loopy pattern that was barely straddling the line between casual and what he actually wanted.

Your breath was coming out shallow, and that bolstered him on. He found a sensitive spot on your hip and you hissed so pretty, leaning back into him. He pulled back, afraid he’d gone too far. There was a balance to this, to the way he had you squirming in his lap, eyes glassy and lips parted. Balance be damned, he wanted more. He dipped his thumb into your skirt, brushing that sensitive spot again.

“Eddie.” The way you breathed out his name went straight to his cock. Selfishly, he wanted to keep you like this forever. Hanging in the balance, flushed cheeks and clenched thighs, almost fucked out with barely a touch in the back of your friend’s van. He wanted this just for himself. Wanted you.

“Fuuuck, princess.” Is all he could manage for a moment. His pointing hand comes down to grab your hip, holding you still so you didn’t squirm too far back and end things before they’ve started.

There was an order these things were supposed to be done in. A conversation, a confession, maybe a kiss. You skipped all of these and took Eddie’s hand, pulling it down to the hemline of your skirt and letting it rest on your thigh.

He almost couldn’t believe you were real. Somewhere, he stopped thinking.

“Been thinking about these thighs all night.” He admitted, his lips back at your ear. You didn’t care what he was saying. You couldn’t care when his fingers were trailing up your thigh, taking their sweet fucking time. “So fucking cute with these thigh-highs, got me fantasizing about bending you over the back seat.”

You could barely keep your eyes open, rolling your hips into his touch when he finally brushed the soft cotton of your panties. It was the faintest touch: a test, a request, an acknowledgement. You needed more.

“Eddie, please.”

He fell quiet as he slid his hand into your panties, watching you with rapt attention like he was afraid you would change your mind. You almost found yourself embarrassed at the damp fabric until he was hissing in your ear, his middle finger sliding across your slick folds.

“Shit.” He buried his face in your neck again, rocking his hips against your ass, “So fucking wet for me, baby.” And that was a new one, baby, but you couldn’t unpack that when his fingers were exploring you, looking for what made you feel the best.

His bracelet was cold against your belly as he let his arm rest on your front, his fingers finding your clit. You were already keyed up from being so close for so long, it didn’t take much to turn you into putty in his hands. You were all heavy breathing and soft whimpers, half lidded eyes and parted lips.

Eddie thought he might be in heaven with the way you melted into his arms. He was careful with you, worried he would scare you away with the strength of his desire, and so he made this about you. Your body was soft and warm against his, and when he slid a single finger inside of you, he started to think he wasn’t going to make it.

You tossed your head back against his shoulder, his name falling from your lips in a tone he never could have made up in his fantasies. Eddie was talking, but he wasn’t even sure if the words had any meaning anymore. He could only think about the way you moan for him as he slowly pumped his finger in and out, his thumb rubbing a gentle circle on your clit as he tested what you liked.

“You moan so pretty for me, baby. Fuck. Wanna make you feel so good.”

The second finger was where you started to slip. His fingers made you feel so full, you couldn’t help but clench around them and the sensation had him moaning into your ear. He rutted into you shamelessly, the denim of his jeans rough through the thin fabric of your skirt. Your toes curled as you started to feel the coil of tension building in your core and you reached out to grab a blanket, his knee, anything to keep you grounded as you felt your control slackening.

“Fuck, Eds, so close, I’m- fuck.” The litany of curses that fell from your lips were like music to Eddie. He peppered kisses to your neck as you rocked on his fingers. Your world narrowed to several points; There was just you and Eddie, his fingers buried in your cunt, curling to find your g-spot, his cock hard against your ass, his lips on your neck, his voice in your ear making your head spin with sweet nonsense, and then you were falling apart. Your body curled in on itself as you clenched around Eddie’s fingers, your hands wrapping around his wrist to slow the onslaught of sensation as he rocked you through it.

When he pulled his hand away, you were breathless and flushed, so pretty with the exertion of your orgasm. Eddie knows that he is well and truly fucked. There was no coming back from this, and if there was, Eddie knew he wouldn’t want to. Not when he knew the way you keened when his fingers found just the right pressure on your clit, not when he knew how wet and hot and tight you would feel, not when you were looking at him like he hung the moon.

“Was that okay?” He checked on you immediately, shifting you in his lap for a better look at your face. You laughed at his worry, still high from pleasure and sensation and him. When you reached up to cup his face, he leaned desperately into the touch, eyes closing instinctively. He was warm and so close and so pretty.

“More than okay, Eds. That was… Fuck. That was so good. Can I--? Do you need--?” You trailed off, embarrassed as Eddie opened his eyes, his gaze dark and intense. He watched you for a moment, calculating, and then he kissed you. Someone needed to set this right, after all, and it was clear it wouldn’t be you.

His lips were as soft as you always imagined they would be. The kiss was sweet, but too short. It was a question, a declaration, and an indulgence all at once. He pulled away to look at you, and then he was leaning in again, gathering you up in both arms so that he could kiss you breathless.

“’m okay, princess.” He said finally, when he thought he was done kissing you. You pouted, though, and then he was kissing you again, peppering them across your face like he’d wanted to do for months.

You curled into his chest, wrinkling your nose when he wiped his hand on the blanket on the floor of his van.

“Maybe, uh… Maybe we can do this again? In a real bed. After, uh, a real date?” Eddie was shy, suddenly, unsure despite the evidence of your affection still sticky on his fingers and his blanket. You would have laughed if your heart didn’t swell so suddenly with affection that you thought you might cry.

“You’re telling me this wasn’t a date, Munson?” You teased, reaching up to kiss him again, just because you could. He went willingly, smiling against your lips. “Got all pretty for you and everything.”

“A second date, then.” Eddie corrected.

“A second date.” You agreed.

He held you as the two of you lapsed into a comfortable silence. His eyes were on you, your eyes were on the stars. And maybe it was love after all, something you could share, just the two of you.

You couldn’t find Orion on your own, so you just found your own patterns in the sky.