#just because your guess was right doesn't mean you were

[for-a-longlongtime]

To all the fans in the Pedro fandom who feel like they don't belong

I see you. We see you. You have a place here among all of us, and we want you to be here - we really do.

No, this isn't a Kumbaya post, I'm fuckin' for real.

To all the writers...

... who receive racist messages, death threats, are being told their reader insert isn't good enough, that this and this character wouldn't be with someone who looks and sounds like you, that you're not using the right words or that you misspelled something --

I am so fucking sorry people had the fuckin' gall to direct that hate at you, because you don't deserve it. You share your stories and characters with us, and they are adored and read and celebrated exactly for who they are - not despite of who they are.

To everybody who lurks, reads, but doesn't feel like they can participate...

... who see how their skin tone, language, identity, gender, body type, sexual orientation, culture, type of relationships, and so much more is underrepresented or actively treated with hostility --

I'm so fucking sorry, and I - as many of us - understand completely why you feel that way, because it's absolutely valid. But I promise it's not how the majority of people feel about you. I know that doesn't make up for shit, but I do want you to know that most of us care a lot.

Nobody should stay in an environment where they feel like they're not wanted, or where remarks are made carelessly without regard for how hurtful stereotypes are. But if this has ever happened to you, be it out of ignorance (or at times malice), please know - your presence matters.

To everybody who has ever felt insecure about their kinks or liking smut... ...please don't. Seriously. Your kinks are what they are and they are completely fine. Liking smut is fine. Liking Pedro characters in smutty fic is fine too. Kink exploration in fic should be a safe space and respected.

Don't shame others here, especially not as an anon. Yes, certain topics that writers address in fic may be challenging for you for a number of reasons, but guess what? You don't have to read it! You don't have to dissect *why* someone wrote that! Don't like smutty fic? Cool, so don't wade into fics marked as explicit. Don't like certain kinks? That's cool, just read the warnings and skip fic when it doesn't appeal to you. Sure you're entitled to your own opinions, but you do not need to air them out in public or trash an author because you didn't like how they wrote something.

To everybody in this fandom...

... especially those of us who are white, able-bodied, straight, cisgender, had formal education, are a native English speaker, and/or many of the other privileges that a lot of us carry in our backpack every day:

We need to do better. Please. For so many reasons.

We need to be aware of our blind spots, biases, the fact that at times everybody fucks up - because we live in a racist, homophobic capitalist patriarchy -, and that occasionally means admitting we were wrong. That we unintentionally said something that was hurtful and that we're sorry for hurting people with our words. That ignorance can slip so easily into words that we type, and that the only way. But own up to it and please don't pull the 'I'm sorry you feel hurt' card - no. Take actual responsibility. Particularly when underrepresented voices explained to you why something is wrong.

And please, call out your friends on things like this - especially if you're white/straight/cis. It's your responsibility to speak up because you're closer to them. White people should be the first to call out racism; it's not up to the people that already are on the receiving end of prejudice (or worse, hatred) to fight that battle.

Exclusion doesn't only happen if you're actively spreading hate - it also happens by not taking accountability for when you fuck up, or when you are erasing and ignoring identities. If the word 'representation' doesn't mean much to you, that's probably because you constantly see yourself reflected in the stories and people in society (that, in itself, is privilege too) - and hey, good for you! But there are many of us who that doesn't apply to in the same measure.

I've had many conversations lately about this with fellow queers as well as brown/black/Latinx folks, so I really wanted to post this. Not as virtue signaling or whatever the hell, but because I know a lot of people are seeing and reading things that are understandably make them reluctant to engage.

So hey, let's do better and look after folks in our community whether we directly engage with them or not. The amount of comments that are always gushing about 'I love how Pedro cares about others/is an ally!' is very disproportionate to seeing similar support expressed for creators and fellow fans. Let's also not forget he's a Chilean man, the son of socialist refugees, who has always actively been on the barricades for LGBTQIA+, rallies against white supremacy and the toxicity of patriarchy -- so if you appreciate his dedication to 'causes', lets apply that to the very real people in this fandom too. And fyi, this isn't just about a single instance or a single person - it's so much bigger than that, and we all know it.

(oh, and if you feel like I'm being a moralist about this - feel free to unfollow or block my ass. You do you! I don't care. I care about the people here who don't want the community harmed by anons who get their kicks from being a bully.)

[heavysighing-dreamyeyes]

Where Home Is

You more or less trick Jason into moving into your apartment ~850 words

For the longest time, Jason didn't have a place to call home. Sure, he had more safehouses than he could count on both hands, but none of them were a home.

He was lucky half the time if his closest place of refuge had a box spring mattress and running water. It never bothered him, not really. It was a side effect of the whole vigilante career, a price he was willing to pay to just get under a roof without having to hike across the city.

And yeah, maybe it would be nicer to have clean, soft blankets to come back to. Maybe it would ease the constant, set tension in his jaw to know what's in his fridge. Maybe not having to guess which safehouse had electricity that week would make his life easier.

But all of that was a luxury he didn't need. Jason didn't need a home, he just needed a place to crash and stitch his wounds until the sky darkened and he could do what he was meant for. Fight the battles that need to be won.

Jason Todd did not need a home.

You've managed to convince him otherwise.

It starts small– you're just the closest place, you have a stocked first aid kit, it made sense to go to you. (He shouldn't have fallen asleep on your couch once he's bandaged and stable, but he doesn't think his nearest safehouse has heat, anyway. So staying had to be the right call that night)

But then he starts to find himself at your window more and more frequently at the end of his patrol, for no particular reason at all.

He doesn't know how or why you do it, how you even manage to convince him, but he goes to you nonetheless, unties his boots at the window and drops his jacket on the back of your arm chair.

At first, it's because you had cookies you wanted him to try, and then it's because you have a book he should pick up tonight because it's just easier if he comes over then.

(It's not, it's four in the morning and he's exhausted and he knows you know that, but he comes anyway and you always get him fall asleep on your couch, again and again)

Logically, Jason shouldn't be so comfortable in your space. Realistically, he shouldn't be sleeping in your apartment, and he most certainly shouldn't be letting you corral him from the couch to your spare bedroom. And he definitely shouldn't be nodding along because you said 'he might as well use it tonight, since no one else is'.

He shouldn't. But he does. And he gets the best night's sleep he's had in years.

Even if sleeping on a mattress that's on a frame and not covered in whatever threadbare blanket he has laying around his safe house means he wakes up without a crick in his back, he shouldn't be indulging in it.

He's taking up your space and your time. Jason tries to make up for it by making breakfast (and restocking your fridge for the trouble), but he doesn't think it exactly evens out.

He reprimands himself every time he leaves the warmth care safety- every time he leaves your home. Yet he always finds himself back in the comfort of your apartment when the sun starts to rise.

It makes him feel guilty. Really, he has so many other places to go, he could camp out nearly anywhere if he had to, but he prefers going to you.

And that's dangerous. That's desperate. And despite his better judgment, he doesn't hate it.

He likes that– no matter how quiet he is– you sleepily pad out of your bedroom to greet him. (How you know he's back, he's never gotten a straight answer)

He likes that you check him over for wounds. He likes that you sit with him if he needs to eat. He likes that you make sure he ends up in the spare bedroom and not the couch. He likes that you pat his arm before wandering, half-awake back to your own bed.

He likes coming home.

The thought startles him, the first time he thinks it, after weeks of letting you convince him to come over for the most mundane reasons– to stay once he caves to your pleas.

And suddenly it's not just your spare bedroom, but his bedroom. It's not just your apartment, but your- and his- home. And the feeling in his chest nearly overwhelms him.

It's the one place he can let his defenses down. The one place where his smiles come freely. The only place he wants to return to when the night ends.

Home. You. (It's synonymous in his mind, and he doesn't quite know what to do with that)

He still has more safehouses than he could ever really use. But Jason Todd only has one home. And it's where his fuzzy red blanket lays thrown haphazardly at the edge of his bed. It's where dinner sits waiting to be reheated in the fridge. It's where a closet has an empty hanger for his jacket to rest.

It's where you wait for him to come back, where you're ready to give him a place to fall, and where he knows he'll land safely if he jumps– or stumbles. (And no amount of distance would ever keep him from making it home, back to you)

[aaagustd]

dreams | myg (m)

title: dreams pairing: min yoongi x (f)reader genre/rating: arranged marriage, smut but no smut, pining; 18+ summary: Yoongi would have never guessed that you'd be the girl of his dreams. warnings: pining, whipped!yoongi, wet dreams, implied smut, yoongi touching himself(aka his big dick), ruined orgasm wc: 0.5k release date: february 19th, 2024; 9:13pm est author’s note: Some of you may recognize this lol. I really want to add to this, but we’ll see. divider credit: 1, 2

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"W-We're going to be late."

You can barely get your words out because every thrust leaves you gasping for air. Your hands grip the railing while you lean over it. The sound of one of your diamond earrings hitting the marble floor goes unheard due to the obscene noises traveling through the mansion.

"That's cool," he grunts. "I don't wanna go anyway."

When Yoongi saw you in that little black dress, he knew his plans were canceled. He's going to need the entire night to appreciate this look. He couldn't even muster up the patience to drag you to bed. How the hell was he supposed to behave for a three hour long event?

"Shit, I'm cumming...!"

This is music to his ears. 

Though he has more plans for you tonight; right now he's only trying to release all the pressure threatening to squirt out of him at any given second.

You've been teasing him all day, testing his patience. He can't hold on anymore. He feels like he might explode.

"Fuck, baby. Me too—"

03:43 am

Not again.

Restless nights have become the norm for Yoongi. Since you moved in, a good night for him is any time he can get a solid five hours.

Tonight is no different. As soon as he drifts off to sleep, he's haunted by the sweetest dreams he's ever had.

His instinct is to savor every moment he can be near you so intimately, but he reminds himself that fantasizing about you in that way is stepping into dangerous territories.

Just because you're his wife, doesn't mean you're his lover or that you'll ever be.

Yoongi doesn't understand how this happened. He was just as resentful of this marriage as you were, but at some point, it all changed. How did you manage to capture his heart when the two of you barely speak?

Shoving the covers away from his body does little to cool him down. The images from his feverish dream still plague his mind.

He bites his lip, pushing those out of his imagination. It's wrong to think like that.

His heart hurts a little whenever he sees your demeanor change as you walk through the front door. It's like you're leaving your real life behind as you're returning to hell.

That's why he tries so hard to make this easier.

Sleeping in a separate room, staying out late, only speaking when necessary—he knows how to stay out of the way. Although sometimes he can't help but wonder... Do you ever get lonely?

He sure as hell does.

Every day women throw themselves at him, expecting him to entertain their promiscuity. But he never does.

He could, and no one would say a word. However, even if he did desire someone else, he could never embarrass you.

Before that happens, he'll slide down his boxers and relieve himself alone, biting into his pillow so you don't hear him crying out your name through the walls.

If he's lucky, he'll pass out after, and be out of his misery.

Hopefully.

Yoongi rolls over and lies on his back, staring at the ceiling as his hand slowly strokes over his skin. The dream he just escaped from starts replaying in his mind, picking up where it ceased. He's already feeling a tingling sensation coursing through his body.

That's it. He's already worked up. Now, he's ready to—

Did he just hear someone knock?

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[alexanderwales]

We were driving down the highway, and Derrick was going exactly the speed limit, like a psychopath.

He was aghast. "You wouldn't let me use your fuckbot?"

"It would be weird," I replied. "You're saying, in the hypothetical world where fuckbots existed, that you would be fine with me saying 'hey, I'm super horny, can I come pick up your fuckbot for the evening?'"

"Hell yeah dude," said Derrick.

"We're talking something that can make a reasonable pass at acting human, who looks human," I said. "That's what we're talking about right now."

"Yeah," said Derrick. "I mean, the kind of thing that realistically would end up being your maid, your chef, all that kind of thing, because if it can carry on a conversation it can probably do your laundry and scrub your tub and whatever."

"If, hypothetically, such a thing existed," I said. "I wouldn't call it a fuckbot, I would call it a domestic robot or something. Even if, for whatever reason, such an expensive labor saving device also had parts and protocols for having sex with it."

"And you wouldn't let me use it," said Derrick. "Not even just to try it out. Like if I was interested in buying one of my own."

"I mean," I said. "No, because you could just ask me what it was like, and I could tell you."

"That's bad market research, dude," said Derrick.

"Look, I'm not letting you have sex with my sexbot," I said. "That's a line that I'm not crossing, in the hypothetical world where domestic servant robots with like personalities and stuff are also ready and willing to have sex with you."

"Is it a hygiene thing?" asked Derrick. "Because I'm imagining like, a little sleeve thing that they could pull out and clean. And it's not like contagion theory is real, that's like, essentialism."

"What?" I asked. "Contagions are definitely real."

"No, I mean ... like this thing where if a knife has touched meat even just one time, it's forever a meat knife unless you do a ritual to turn it back into a dairy knife."

"What?" I asked again.

Derrick was still driving the speed limit. People were going around us, and some of them were honking. He was easily ten miles an hour slower than any of the surrounding traffic.

"The Jewish thing, with the knives," said Derrick. "You touch a knife to meat even once, and then it's a meat knife, and it doesn't matter if you put it in a like, immersion steamer or something."

"This is about keeping kosher?" I asked. "You're talking about whether a sexbot is kosher?"

"I'm saying that there's this idea, right, that if I put my dick inside your sexbot, that sexbot is forever tainted, and it doesn't matter if there's a sleeve that can be sterilized, or whatever, it's just this idea that the act independent of physical reality is ... a contagion, I guess."

"Surely there's a way of making a knife kosher again," I said. "I mean, surely, if you accidentally touch a knife to a piece of meat it's not a meat knife forever, surely you don't throw your favorite knife out because it's ritually unclean."

"I don't know man," said Derrick. "I'm just gesturing at the idea, you know?"

"I mean, there's probably some ritual cleaning or something," I said. "Can I look this up?"

"No," said Derrick. "I'm driving, I need someone to talk to, if I let you look it up you're going to have your nose in the phone for the next half hour, easily."

"Fine," I replied. "Anyway, I get the idea, and it's not that I think it's like ... magic or something, like you using it would metaphysically alter the sexbot. It's more like ... in my mind, it would be my girlfriend, right? Or like a girlfriend replacement. If you can't find a girlfriend, store bought is fine, that kind of thing."

"Interesting," said Derrick. "I was thinking of it as a sort of ... maid, I guess. And if you hired a maid, and she said to you 'hey, I'm super horny basically all the time, so if after I'm done cleaning, or if I'm in the middle of cleaning, and you want to have a go, I am basically always up for it, then ... I mean, you might, right? And you wouldn't be surprised if she was having sex with other people. And if you explained this to me, and I said 'hey, can I get her number', you'd give me her number, right?" He glanced over at me. "Right?"

"I guess in that case, she would have agency," I said. "And it wouldn't be the same. Because if I hired a domestic servant robot, I would be extremely surprised to find out she'd been having sex with other people, like ... when I was away ... or something."

"But you'd give me her number, right?" asked Derrick.

"In this scenario, is this maid ... a sex worker?" I asked. "Like, is the understanding that I'm paying her for cleaning the house and sexual availability?"

"Nah, I don't know dude," said Derrick. "You know, when you think about it, a combination domestic servant and fuckbot is kind of fucked up. Like, misogynistic."

"Does it get less fucked up if it's a guy?" I asked.

"Honestly, yeah," said Derrick. "That's practically progressive."

"I mean, it's sort of inherent to the concept of a sexbot," I said. "I don't know how you do one of those that's immune from criticism. And calling it a fuckbot doesn't help. I mean, it's a facsimile of a woman, whose only purpose is doing domestic labor and having sex."

"And there's this power dynamic thing," said Derrick. "Like, you own her, right? And you tell her whether or not your friends are allowed to have sex with her. No agency, like you said."

"So you think that me loaning out my sexbot to you, in this hypothetical, is a win for feminisim," I said.

"Honestly, yeah," said Derrick.

"Well, I'm still not going to do it," I said. "I'd feel weird about it."

"I think it's this girlfriend mentality," said Derrick. "Like, girlfriend replacement, that's probably not a healthy way to think about a fuckbot."

"We said illusion of sentience, right?" I asked. "Like, it can carry on a conversation with you, and you mostly won't notice anything weird? Because if that's the case, it's kind of weirder for it not to be a girlfriend, or something like a girlfriend, like if it's only doing all the household chores and the cooking and cleaning and you have sex with it, and it's perfectly capable of asking how your day is or expressing interest in how you're doing in League, but you just don't talk to each other? That's weird. And seems less healthy than just carrying on a conversation."

"Yeah, maybe," said Derrick. "But like ... no way anyone is going to be your girlfriend if you have a fuckbot, that's a real concern."

"In this hypothetical world where someone like me without a huge amount of extra money can afford a domestic robot, I think attitudes would change," I said. "On dating apps or whatever you'd have people tagging 'robot friendly!' or 'absolutely no robofuckers' or whatever. And I would assume that women would have them too, and then when I did get a girlfriend, she'd move in with her own domestic robot, and I'd make peace with the fact that sometimes we'd have sex together and sometimes she'd want to just have her sexbot please her."

"Totally not what would happen," said Derrick. "You're trying to create some kind of normalcy around this? Like you'd just be in a little, I don't know, polycule with two robots?"

"I mean, they're sub-sentient robots, so no, not a polycule," I replied. "Part of the premise is that they are, in fact, incapable of cognition as we know it, that they don't actually have emotions or ambitions or agency beyond what's programmed into them. If we're saying that they're effectively humans but made of electronics and not meat, that's totally different, all my answers have to change."

"And if they did have emotions," said Derrick. "If they did have agency and cognition and whatnot, then —"

"Then they'd be slaves," I said. "And I'm not cool with slavery, so I wouldn't have one."

"What if they were volunteers?" asked Derrick. "If they had emotions and thoughts and all that other stuff, and they came off the factory line really wanting to be fuckbots and domestic servants."

"Sketchy," I said. "But ... maybe, depending on the details."

"And in that case, if they had agency of their own, would you let me have sex with your fuckbot?" asked Derrick.

I rolled my eyes. "Alright, fine, if the sexbots were fully human-level intelligent with agency and emotions and wants and dreams, and it seemed like the robot I lived with was actually interested, yes, I would give my blessing."

"Niiiiice," said Derrick.

Another car came up fast behind us and swerved into the other lane to avoid us, honking as it blew past.

"Can I ask why you're driving so goddamned slow?" I asked.

"Oh, I was doing it as a bit, I wanted to see how long it would take for you to notice."

Derrick smiled at me, then put his foot on the gas.

[drdemonprince]

your post about coming out reminds me of how there's someone i regret coming out to about one of my identities because the community preaches the importance of being out and proud. this person is safe, they're understanding and willing to learn, but they still hold biases and stereotypes that made me uncomfortable. i think at first i thought, well, since they're open minded, i can slowly help them unlearn things, because hey, the important thing is the will to learn, right? i'm also 100% sure they won't put my safety at risk even if they don't understand. i should be grateful that at the very least i didn't come out to a bigoted person, right?

but after long reflection, i think i went about it the wrong way. i did not take my personal boundaries into question. turns out that all this time i have an extremely strict boundary against coworkers knowing my identities. i thought coming out might make my work life slightly easier by lessening the mask i need to perform. but no, turns out the "mask" was there as a boundary, and having that boundary breached (even if by my own volition) makes me feel extremely uncomfortable and violated bc of how vulnerable the information i revealed is. a comparison is maybe something like, i'm not ashamed of having kinks and doing the things i do in my free time, but being proud of my kinks doesn't immediately translate to me wanting my coworkers to know my specific kinks? even if, say, my coworkers are accepting and wouldn't endanger or harass me for it. but it didn't register to me because i guess the general consensus (at the very least in spaces i frequent) is that only sex and kink related things are allowed to have the weight of being something private that you get to "hide" and put boundaries around, whileas for other things like "information", there's this undertone of "you shouldn't be ashamed" that sometimes translates into "if you're not ashamed you should be okay with revealing information to people who are safe, and if you don't want to despite clear signs of those people being safe, then you're contributing to our identities' erasure by pandering to the oppressors"

these are really useful considerations for people to keep in mind I think. Shame isn't the only reason why we avoid divulging information to certain people. sometimes we just do it to preserve our energy. other reasons like safety and reducing vulnerability, or even just keeping clear boundaries between our private lives and our work lives are also entirely legitimate. in a very real way it is harder for your workplace to own all of you if you keep some parts of yourself separate. a lot of organizations that claim to be highly accepting will tokenize you or use your more vulnerable identities to glorify themselves and that can make work far more exhausting than if you're just kind of vague about who you are. people have to navigate these kinds of competing concerns all the time, including in their families and neighborhoods as well, and it doesn't mean they're a failure of queer liberation or insufficiently proud of their identities.

but most of us were fed a very simplistic and individualistic narrative of queer pride, in which a person single-handedly overcomes bigotry simply by being out and confident about it everywhere. That's really not how it works. it's a collective struggle. and part of that collective struggle is just finding our spaces where we are safe and investing more of our energy in those places. nothing wrong with giving other spaces less of that energy.

[reallapiscake12]

Actually i wanna talk more about this

i highly doubt im the right person qualified to talk about this but yknow what i dont fucking care-

Im sure most of you are aware of that complete dogshit take about creepypastas and the fandom by a certain individual, been there done that we all know how dumb it was that's not what i wanna talk about what i wanna focus on is certain thing said individual seems to be really obsessed with, that being the fact that the fandom likes to "humanize" the pastas and give them sad backstories or redeeming traits. They think that doing so is glorifying killers when they should be depicted as evil horrible people all the time. Now i can understand where they're coming cause killers are bad we shouldn't be making them seem good, right? But to me personally this kinda seems like a really shallow minded take and such thinking can just lead to having boring empty and flat characters. And most of all it's also more unrealistic.

Lets emphasize on the realism part, sense this guy is obsessed with realism. If you look at real world cases of infamous killers you would notice that alot of them usually have at the very least one positive trait to them or a couple. They're nice to friends and family, they're good parents, they maybe do some community service. People in their town say they were a sweetheart and a grade A citizen, which makes it even more heartbreaking when they find out the horrible things they commit. They may have some red flags but you wouldn't have guessed they were a fucking serial killer. The thing is that these people ARE humans and humans are very complicated creatures, someone can be horrible to some people but sweet and loving to others. And i'd argue that "humanizing" the killers honestly makes them scarier than if they were comically evil bad guys. It's the simple idea that this seemingly average person is secretly a killer, someone who seems nice and a great person to be around actually tortures and kills people for fun. The simple idea of literally anyone you could know could possibly be a terrible monster, anyone you could talk to or even just some rando on the street could be committing diabolical crimes beyond your comprehension. And you would never know until they were caught, and when that happens the dread you would feel knowing you lived right next door to a murderer and didn't even know is unlike any kind of fear imaginable. The simple fact that these people are humans but are able to commit such things to their own kind is fucking terrifying. And i dont think it's bad to want to depict these killers as humans, i dont think people depicting jeff the killer helping a kid get their kite out the tree means they want to go and kiss ted bundy. Because at the end of the day these are fictional characters from shitty 2012's internet horror stories made by a 13 yr old, and the stories we depict of these characters doesn't at all reflect how we actually are. so can we stop with the bullshit about "humanizing creepypastas" cause it is not the same as glorifying killers-

srry this was abit disjointed i just woke up from a nap and really wanted to talk about this cause its something that ticks me but feelsl ike nobody else talks about so i just gbhngdfgbhfd thank you for coming to my ted talk keep making cringe headcanons about jeff the kilelr buhbyeee

[acourtofthought]

What’s your take on people saying that Elain and Lucien have no chemistry. I see that a lot in the fandom and I always feel confused it almost feels like I don’t know what I am reading cause I can remember when I read that first scene with them in ACOWAR my heart was bursting with all the angst. I read it over and over again but then people say they don’t have chemistry and I don’t know how to feel.

I think your reading experience and analysis is just as valid for you as theirs is for them and if you feel something while reading Elain and Lucien then who are they to tell you otherwise?

I might differ from E/riels when it comes to who Elain's endgame is and who Sarah has clearly set up as being the right guy for her but that doesn't mean I would ever tell them they're wrong for thinking Sarah was also building for something (whatever that may be) to have existed for Elain and Az, just like Sarah was building for something to exist because Chaol and Celaena even while she was kissing Dorian, or building something for Rowan and Aelin even while she was laying in bed beside him missing Chaol.

I think E/riels tend to take look at this book with a very simplistic lens (she wants to kiss Az therefore she must end up with Az even though her book hasn't even been written!) whereas I think Elucien's tend to look a little deeper, "just because this is what's written on the page right now I believe Sarah is laying the clues for a different path for Elain". So we don't necessarily need to see fireworks for Elain and Lucien right now in order for us to believe that's still coming.

As far as Elain and Lucien having no chemistry, I guess it depends on what someone's definition of chemistry is. Are we talking sexual chemistry? Banter? Heated arguments?

I wouldn't say their chemistry is jumping off the page right now but there are many valid reasons for that. I don't think Az and Elain's chemistry jumps off the page either, I would have never known he was harboring such lusty thoughts for her until we got his POV in the bonus. Remember the scene where Mor is wearing a white dress and Feyre looks over to see Az hungrily staring after her? Or when he looked at her with heat and yearning on Solstice while Elain sat in the room with him? His desire for Mor was blatantly obvious for anyone to see but the only thing anyone ever noticed for Az when it came to Elain is his kindness and later one charged look. After the blatant yearning he had on his face for Mor over multiple books, "charged look" is pretty anti-climatic. Not to mention his "soft voice, gentle hands, etc." when he's around Elain. To me that reads more like he's trying not to scare a frightened animal or child than having any real chemistry with his future wife that's supposed to be his equal.

With Elain and Lucien I think there is a lot of tension right now. When her eyes spark upon looking at him, when she felt him tug on their bond, when she locked eyes with him before he left to find Vassa. I think Elain is keeping her thoughts of Lucien hidden (Feyre confirms Elain is better at secret keeping than Az), therefore there's no way to get a sense of any chemistry between them because Elain has not really dropped her guard. Not to mention Elain was in love with Graysen and severely depressed the only time we ever witnessed Elain and Lucien alone together, he was struggling with his guilt over Jesminda's death and sadness over having no home. These are two people who were weighted down by some pretty heavy issues and now dealing with a completely unexpected bond on top of it so I'm not sure why anyone is looking for them to be laughing and carrying on. Az sat there listening to Elain talk about gardens, Lucien was sitting there listening to Elain talk about the loss of her humanity and Graysen. Elain gave Az gag gifts for Solstice, Elain is now suddenly ignoring Lucien. Frivolous might be fun, but it's not real so yeah, there might be more scenes where Elain and Az are in more relaxed scenarios which could translate to "chemistry" for others but these sorts of books typically prefer drama and tension for the endgame pairings which Elain and Lucien do have. Not to mention both Elain and Lucien are extremely polite and well-mannered, often hiding what they really want to say behind civility, so I think we are going to need scenes where everyone isn't staring them down to see what they're going to say and do. We finally had a scene like that for Elain and Az in his bonus and to me, it was cringey. Her hands were shaking, they shared no banter, Elain's mouth only "twitched" into a smile, he "left the rest unspoken" which means they're still not having any real conversations. Yes, they were down to hook-up but it felt empty and shallow to me, I don't consider that meaningful chemistry.

Do you remember in Pride and Prejudice, where Jane really did like Mr. Bingley but Darcy thought he was protecting his friend by telling him that she did not feel as strongly for him as he did for her so they left? And Elizabeth later yells at Darcy claiming that her sister hardly talks of her own emotions with her? I think that's a little of what we're seeing with Elain right now when it comes to Lucien. Not necessarily that she's in love with him but I think she's more intrigued by Lucien than anyone realizes. Just like we later found out Feyre wanted Rhys even UTM (then went on to accept Tamlin's proposal), just like we found out Nesta wanted Cassian from the first moment she met him (but went on to sleep with other guys), I think we'll see that Elain was equally as effected by Lucien but has been fighting it this entire time.

It seems purposeful that Sarah chose to have Elain completely ignore Lucien in the novella and SF. Chemistry cannot be determined if two characters never talk, barely even look at each other, and that to me means that now that Graysen is out of the picture, Elain and Lucien's chemistry would be much more difficult to hide so rather than give anything away she just chose to have them not interact. And I think just like we had the line in P & P where everyone is shocked at Elizabeth accepting Darcy's proposal because everyone thought she hated him, we'll see something similar for the other characters when it comes to Elain with Lucien.

[lenz3r]

Spenza I love you but dear God you did all that shit based on a HUNCH. He's the #1 Sharra hater chat💔

[narnia-dreamer]

Me, going to Critical role tag to see Predathos arts and theories (and also parallelisms to the Collector):

Also me, finding only hatred and people complaining:

[secriden]

*cracks knuckles* Okay lets talk about the elephant in the room: Style going to the support group for those who've suffered loss and telling what appears to be a fake story about losing his pet dog.

I'm going to point out a few things that I think provide a framework for Style's actions here. Not because I think it excuses what he did, but because I think a nuanced read is what the character deserves.

Point 1: An irresistible opportunity

The subs put the "Support Group for Loss" on the image in the notebook, but I'm not sure there's anything to suggest that Style would've known that was what this image represents until he showed up and saw the sign on top of the door.

In episode 2, Bison says, "He plans everything down from years, months, weeks to days" and then tells Kant:

So Style is literally just going to addresses/locations at given days and times, potentially not knowing what to expect. And as much as Fadel is certainly attending this meeting as a response to having that heartbreaking flashback (😭), this is also something he attends regularly and has planned to attend way in advance. So Style has no reason to think Fadel is attending this meeting because of a recent resurfacing of his pain.

What we, the audience, and what the characters know are very different things.

Now, should Style have turned his cute ass right around once he realised what this meeting was? Of course he should. But that wouldn't have been true to Style's character. We've been told by his best friend that he is "crazy" and been shown repeatedly that he lives right up to that description.

Style is impulsive. He's all base instinct and he acts on his desires without thought or contemplation. And by this point he is desperate for a deeper connection with Fadel. He's fascinated, captivated by the mystery that is Fadel and this is an excellent opportunity to finally see behind the wall Fadel so carefully maintains.

When Style sees the sign above the door, Style looks at the notebook (which, again, shows nothing but people sitting in a circle with the words RISE UP) like he's just realising what it means. He then gets this amused, almost rueful look on his face (like he's thinking "am I really going to do this?") before it shifts to determination and he walks through the door.

(My soul for the ability to once again gif something because FUCK Dunk is doing SO MUCH in this show!!)

To Style, this is just too good of an opportunity to give up.

Because let's be real, Fadel is so clearly lying and hiding something:

Fadel is shady as FUCK. He is simultaneously actually a really good cook (Style finally tries his burger so he knows, now), and also has the skills to work at a strip host club, and also can take on 3 guys in a fight, and also can break a man's arm with his thighs. Can you honestly blame Style for losing his mind just a little bit about wanting to get his hands on something, anything, to figure this man out?

Style is being absolutely consistent in his persistence to understand Fadel. This isn't about the car or about finally 'winning' the fight (thank you @airenyah for giving such a detailed framework to understand what Style's been doing until this point) anymore. This is about Style wanting to know Fadel himself.

Point 2: The potential implications of the setting

Now, what might give us a bit of insight as to why Style is this way? I have a theory (albeit one that could prove to be very wrong, but hear me out). I think this whole entire show is set in what could potentially be quite a small town/suburb.

There's a few things that make this theory plausible:

(1) Fadel and Bison are in hiding after Bison blew their previous cover. They're probably on the run from some section of the authorities and so it makes sense to settle in a quiet/out of the way place.

(2) Style seems to be really familiar with the people in the area. Like he grew up there and its the kind of small town where everyone knows everyone and everyone is in everyone else's business.

(3) Style is clearly the darling of the market aunties and uncles.

Style just lost her a sale and potentially a loyal customer, and she's still rooting for him? In episode 2, when Style asks the uncle to let him borrow his cart, it takes nothing but his word for the uncle to give Style his entire cart of produce for his ridiculous scheme.

Style is so clearly someone they all know well and have great affection for, and a very plausible explanation for this is that they all watched him grow up and the entire market (town/village) is fond of him.

And honestly?? Yeah, we see the way Style is actually quite sweet in that careless, guileless, thoughtless way. He goes the extra mile to fix his mistake with Fadel by replacing his car parts for free in episode 1. He helps out by taking orders in episode 2 without being asked and takes it seriously. In episode 3, he tries to drive more business to Fadel's store (bless him, he so clearly does NOT understand how restaurants work, but he MEANS well!!), and can we all acknowledge that it works?? He understands how to appeal to potential customers in the area because he knows the people there. It's not (entirely) his fault that Fadel wasn't remotely prepared for an actual rush crowd and Bison was off getting kinky with Kant and not doing his (fake) job. He is so clear about not judging Fadel's host job and tries his hardest to help him (to absolutely NO effect, but still) when the 3 guys gang up on Fadel.

Style is so loved and more importantly so very loveable.

Point 3: What this could mean for Style's character

So, potentially, Style is someone who grew up in a small town, who has been well loved, potentially spoiled and coddled, but also very much kept within the confines of the narrow viewpoint that a quiet, country town places on you.

It's in the way his dad scolds him as if he was still a child when he's at least in his mid to late 20s. It's in the way Style was so mad at Fadel for scolding him ("thanks for the lecture, dad"), like that hit a sore point for Style. It's in the way no one in the market takes him seriously; they're fond, but he's still a kid in their eyes. It's in the way he has an abundance of free time like he doesn't REALLY need to work at his dad's shop. It's in the way he sees Fadel beat 3 guys up with ease, starts wondering if Fadel is an assassin or a hitman, and is completely unfazed like he doesn't quite have a handle on reality.

It's in the way his best friend is a man who has no qualms about lying to him and putting his life in danger, and how Style seems to have no other friends or people (aside from his dad) in his life.

@wuxian-vs-wangji made a comment to me about Style being desperate for a meaningful connection, and I think she hit the nail on the head. Because along comes Fadel, a mysterious stranger with a suspiciously versatile set of skills who is also very hot and keeps giving Style these wonderfully complex reactions? Who sometimes wants nothing to do with Style, but at other times seems to be at war within himself about desperately wanting him? Who treats Style with anything but apathy?

This is catnip to Style; he never had any hope of resisting this.

Breaking news: Style is a complex and imperfect character...

Here's the thing, though: he was never going to try. The show has been incredibly upfront about who Style is as a person. Regardless of whether I'm correct about why he is this way (ie. that he is very much the product of the environment that didn't know how to handle a kid with Style's personality), episode 3 shouldn't have surprised anyone about Style. He's been incredibly consistent and true to himself.

He wants Fadel and he's "crazy" enough to go all in, no holds barred about it, and the Support Group was the biggest doorway to finally discovering something REAL about Fadel.

And its not just about sex or to prove his superiority anymore. Because if it was just that, then Style would have reacted very differently to their first time.

In this scene, Style is pleased and evidently enjoying himself, but he isn't exuberant. He isn't overcome with joy. If anything, he was more happy and excited when Fadel let him help out in the diner (I mentioned this in the tags in this post too) than he was when Fadel is literally fucking him. He lets Fadel set the pace; barely moves to touch Fadel except to hold him close. Almost like he doesn't want to accidentally mess this up, like he's worried he'll take too much, so he'll take what Fadel gives him and no more (please appreciate @braceletofteeth's amazing tags on this post). For a character that has been so aggressively on the offensive, this is shocking until you realise that sleeping with Fadel - while it's a step in the right direction - isn't Style's end goal anymore.

And he makes that abundantly clear in this episode:

Does Style even fully realise the weight of this desire? I doubt it. But I do believe that Style is in earnest. He doesn't fully understand his own feelings, but he also doesn't really care to either. All he knows is that he wants Fadel, wants his attention and his passion and his focus and his heart.

...but Style is also kind of, sort of, perfect.

Because he's exactly, precisely, breathtakingly exactly what Fadel needs.

Because Fadel is hurt and broken and bleeding inside. Because Fadel is barely holding it all together for Bison's sake, but has already given up hope for any true happiness for himself. Because Fadel can't trust anyone or anything in his life, when he's been used and used and used by the family who should've loved and cared and protected him.

Because it's going to take nothing short of this kind of unwavering, unshakable, uncomplicated determination to give Fadel even a chance of healing and opening his heart to love again.

[front-facing-pokemon]

[gingerbreadmonsters]

its so important to me that you know how much ive already cried over this wip and its literally only been two days

[jubileebloom]

I aspire to be a lover not a hater. but

[kameonerd566]

.

[ranvwoop]

i need to expel the silly guys in my brain . but i forgot how to draw and writing is hard... much to think about

[seraphim-soulmate]

so how do I reconcile with just having big baby loser brain that decided I'd be mentally ill and perpetually stuck suffering instead of having just dealt with my shit in a more normal way? or is there some neuroscience that can explains that I don't have a cringefail brain but it's actually something else??

i mean. it's shame. shame I feel for struggling with things i consider i shouldn't struggle with, which i guess is kinda stupid bcs when i take a step back i realize it's understandable that im struggling with certain things ive lived through. being stuck in them doesn't entirely make sense, but I'm willing to accept that my past shaped me. not to mention that I'm also somehow kind of constantly going through really hard situations on top of also dealing with my past? but it also all (mental illness and emotional sensitivity, I mean) started with something, and my early childhood was my parents getting divorced.

but I consider that banal, plenty of parents get divorced and it doesn't mean their kid suffers from treatment-resistant depression and ptsd. I guess divorce is so normalized now that i don't consider it a valid thing to be traumatized over, at least not to the extent to which ive experienced symptoms. but I was separated from one parent, always missing one or the other, without any explanation that could make sense to a child's brain about why any of this happened and why i have to suffer because of it. can I get rid of the shame by validating the struggles I went through? would that make me feel better about having been disabled by my life experiences?