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alotsgonnachange · 4 years ago

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Mystic Messenger Saeran’s AE Thoughts (.......And Prayers..) #Spoilerz

Hello, I just finished Saeran’s after ending and I have a lot of things to say and I am going to write it down while I'm still all keyed up about it.

First of all… Please DO NOT ask me how much money I spent to finish this as fast as I did…. I’m grown but my bank account is certainly going to have a good ole fashioned CHUCKLE at this….. It’s been a long quarantine I deserve a lil happiness as a treat methinks!

I have been playing this absolutely insane game since I think 2016? When I first started playing the deep routes had JUST come out I think? And I was just finishing up high school and am now a college grad...lmao

I’ve played all routes at least once except Jaehee but i’ve seen walkthroughs of her route (I’ve heard it makes you hate Jumin and he’s my favorite so um. hehe). V’s and Saeran’s routes I found to be so emotionally intense and just….a lot and I've been waiting a long ass god damn time for this after ending okay…. I would theorize and make up an ending in my head but i’m no writer so it was hard to figure out lol. I’m a Jumin stan mostly but I love everybody and yeah I should probably play that jumin dlc too but I need like a DAY to recover from Saeran’s AE. Enough about me HERE are my thoughts on it overall

Major Saeran AE Spoilers under da cut!

Can we please discuss V showing up to the C+R conference room with basically chloroform and made everybody Pass Out like??? I was alone in my room at like midnight just SCREAMING at my phone???? And the creepy ass CG ???? It’s like that gif of sarah paulson from ahs being like “I put arsenic in the wine….and the pasta”

Anyway I screamed at V a lot during this process!!

Loved RFA being sweet and kind to saeran (before V fucking drugged them…)

This is such common V behavior “I have to do it all myself...there’s no other way..” GIRL SHUT UPPP You do this every route....

SO many CG’s and I enjoy them a lot

Saeran’s sprite looks a little TOO crisp compared to everyone else but maybe its a glitch??? V next to him is in 480p while saeran is like 1080p

Hearing both Saeran and Saeyoung missing the other brother the whole time??? PAIN. All my homies know is PAIN

BOSS and his V for Vendetta ass guy fawkes mask??? I literally yelled “this game is TERRIBLE!!” several times at my phone

Their dad is so>??????? When he was sitting on the couch with saeyoung in that one CG while simultaneously telling him to kill himself?????????? Maybe chairman han is actually the best dad in this game somehow

When V and Rika were like we’re back together teehee teehee okay pack it up bonnie and clyde ..

When chairman han calls u and says hes jealous of u and saeran…..HUH????? I’m calling HR

When they go to the apartment and see boss and vanderwood and poor saeyoung is sitting there seeing his brother for the first time in years i wanted to D word sooooo bad like PAIN...PAIN….

Can we HAVE A DISCUSSION ABOUT JUMIN HAN BEING THE BEST CHARACTER IN THE GAME AND HE LOST EVERYTHING IN THIS AE……. he just took the blame and moved on jumin what the hell….. I love him so much r we serious? He watched his 2 closest friends betray him in the worst way and found out abt how Rika abused Saeyoung and Saeran???? I felt just AWFUL. Terrible ...Terrible….

Rika’s change in demeanor from Saeran's actual route is certainly a Choice. I find her much more bearable this time around and unfortunately i think I was too nice to her and ended up with a bad end LMFAO

I was happy to see Saeran stand up for himself and become stronger and confident. You go king!

The CG of Yoosung laying in Zen’s lap is everything to me…

HOWEVER YUP I sure did get a bad ending and I was so mad fdsafdskfdhsf ! (I would be happy to clarify how I got the good one the second time.) MAKE SURE To SAVE EARLY in days 2 and 3 bc the branches on day 4 is where the bad end will show up. For me it was the first day 4 chat and then a story mode titled “SAVIOR”.... If you see that RUN FOR THE HILLS!!

I was so mad! But I had saved in day 2 and replayed and MANAGED to get good end

I’m obsessed with everyone calling V and Rika “that psychotic couple” like…..its true its true…

No those two are so toxic… V’s route was torture watching them go on and on about the sun like yo can yall just call each other babe like normal people.

I respect straight people but not V and RIka that shit was just wrong�� Straight marriage was a mistake

Oh lord i also FULLY Forgot Rika killed the twins’ mother…. Yeah that scene was um Certainly a lot but it needed to happen eventually

Like it’s good they know but damn that storyline is just so bleak

I think it was satisfying TO A DEGREE….To see Rika understand where she was wrong, why she was wrong, fess up and even APOLOGIZE! I was very surprised.

Saeran and Saeyoung are Certainly twins with the amount that those two self sacrifice in every route MY GOD…..

The scene with Jumin talking to his father and the other scene of him praying oh my god I cannot tell you how happy I was to see him begin to understand and address his own feelings in a route that was not his own. My main problem with Jumin’s route has always been the trapping MC in his penthouse aspect.. This way Jumin understands love and emotions without being overly possessive !!! YAY also loved seeing him be on good terms with his dad who was surprisingly profound

That last Story mode was Really a Lot…. and Strange things occurred which I will get into in just a minute

Jumin becoming a politician is so funny but ngl … i see it.

Yoosung going to france to study pastries ok king I see u! (it made more sense to me than the vet thing anyway)

Lastly Zen FURRY ERA

MY BEEF With the AE

I was happy with how they handled it for the most part. I think Cheritz heard our feedback about V’s after ending and was like okay….let’s try something different

HOWEVER

Saeran…. Sweet kind saeran… IS SO AFFECTIONATE HAHA….

He must have said I love you like 300 times…..very mushy gushy flowery language...and maybe that’s just his personality but for me it was like eating cake with buttercream cake. It means well, but god damn is it sugary and going to cause a stomach ache later.

He was just… SO MUCH! SO forward and ON all the time in his affections. I honestly felt kind of smothered and by day 3 and 4 I was sooooo over all the compliments… King you’ve come a very long way, but ur still putting MC on a pedestal and probably need to see a therapist.

Nextly….Rika and V….. Naw that knock out gas really ...that hurt lol. Coming from “I would do anything to protect RFA” V? Idk like…. EYE felt betrayed reading that. It was just hurtful. I can’t even imagine how the members would have felt as they were passing out. It was just so cruel. I suppose I understand why but like?? Just TERRIBLE

Them being in cahoots with the agency and the prime minister..HUH??? Also too much

V just felt so irresponsible like I do understand that he ended up in a weird web of secrets that’s hard to untangle but he’s so fucking stubborn he’s SO stubborn it makes me insane. Like sir… It seems like in other routes he wanted to try to protect Rika and the RFA.. But in this AE it seems more to me that he was like yeah i’m protecting Rika and That’s It… so fucking hurtful to me. Both of y’all apologize ESPECIALLY to the twins and Jumin..

The forgiveness thing…… Okay so I think some people will not like that Saeran decided to “forgive” the people who hurt him (Rika, V, Saejoong, his mother). I would point out that I actually think this was approached somewhat well. He says at one point that he doesn’t think they’re good or bad, just people. I think he sounded mature and like this was the way for him personally to accomplish his healing process. Would I have loved for Saeran to flip V and Rika off and kick Saejoong off a cliff? Yea I really would. But like…. If that’s what HE needs to do to heal then who am I to judge?

HOWEVER…. Everything Eye just said goes out the window when the scenes at the end with Saejoong come up… I was PERPLEXED. Like why did he HUG his deranged father who just kicked the shit out of him??? Also all the chat options that MC has with him r like blah blah you’re like this because no one loves you were so corny to me LMFAOOOO?

AND WHEN HE WAS IN THE ROOM LATER WITH SAERAN… i’m sorry but if that were me I would have called a nurse to deck his ass. Cool he turned himself in YOU SUCK SOOOO BAD AND I NEVER WANT YOU TO COME NEAR SAEYOUNG AND SAERAN AGAIN THANKS.

*scratches ass* I wish I got to see saeyoung and saeran finally sit down and have that first conversation after a long time and hug CG but the ending was fine I GUESS….. I dont care about ROMANCE I want those boys to be happy brothers together

Anyway that was really emotionally exhausting but I fr think I got it out of my system after literal years… And I can rest in peace knowing the choi twins are happy. THATS ALL I WANTED TO KNOW!!!!

#Saeran Choi #Saeran AE #Saeran after ending #Saeran AE spoilers #Mystic messenger #Mysme #Saeran after ending spoilers #mystic messenger spoilers

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caffiine · 4 years ago

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A BRIEF PAUSE

From my regularly scheduled content. I’ve got some shit to say, y’all (forewarning for spicy language and spoilers)

I thought about making this post on my fandom subblog but this show and this relationship have been TOO important to me for the past 8 years to not give it its proper place in my life. strap in bc im not sure how long this mf is about to be.

When i started this DUMB show at age 19 tortured soul “empath” dark academia me thought sam winchester was going to be my favourite character. and don’t @ me, i love sam now in his own right (and we deserve some SAILEEN PEOPLE). but after literally less than 5 episodes i KNEW dean’s character and his arc were going to be amazing and beautiful and he immediately became my favourite brother. The nuances of his character i.e. his shell vs his true self were so evident to me even in the first couple seasons. in my humble opinion, he had the most growth of the two brothers.

They all deserve to be happy, but for whatever FUCKING reason dean has the HARDEST TIME OF ANYONE being happy in this show. I know it’s his character. I know it was written that way. But FFS. I kept wondering when they were going to wrap up his emotional arc and stop torturing the poor dude.

then in season 4 they introduced castiel and 1) I thought the new concept of angels as assholes was super cool and 2) I hardcore SIMPED over misha collins (still do). I watched benignly as cas and dean began to form this relationship that seemed pretty special. I started watching the show when it was in its eighth season and I binged the shit out of it for two weeks until I was caught up. By the time I was caught up I was CERTAIN there were some feelings between them and I LOVED it. I am bisexual and I was ECSTATIC for a potential queer relationship between two masculine-portrayed dudes. I went on tumblr to express my newfound theory, only to find out that this was a real THING. “Destiel” was already an idea that had absolutely and intensely BLOSSOMED in the fandom for several seasons already. So many others saw what I saw and saw the potential of emotionally tortured/constipated “daddy’s blunt instrument” dean and the unfeeling daddy’s boy cas “crack in his chassis” Winchester being allowed to be happy together. I felt validated and hopeful. For a while.

Then it was season after season of hopefulness for them to be finally happy with each other while still fighting the ills of their world with sam and the other new members of their family that were added along the way, only to constantly have that hope seemingly teased away at the end every single time. By season 11 and the introduction of amara (not bashing, eventually loved her character and her development too) I gave up. I lost hope. I stopped watching the show. I didn’t want to keep watching my two favourite characters continuously abused by the story they were thrown into.

I know not everyone likes destiel, not everyone thought it was real. That’s chill, idc. Stories are so often meant to be (and sometimes inadvertently) left up to interpretation by the person experiencing and consuming them. It’s what’s so amazing about books and shows and movies that are able to make us feel so intensely about them and their characters. And I felt SO strongly about dean and cas. It was honestly really upsetting to me, the way the show was going with their relationship.

A while later season 13 had been going on and I started seeing some things pop up on my dash. Hopeful things. I did a bit of research and accidentally saw THE SCENE from season 12 and I couldn’t help myself. I restarted it. I watched the whole thing from the beginning again AND introduced it to my boyfriend I think partially as a way to ensure I wasn’t imagining shit (it took him awhile and a lot of me internally screaming during many scenes but by season 9 he was like “uh are they in gay love”). Fast forward to me finally catching up as season 14 was starting. I was still hopeful, somehow. And it happened AGAIN. Season 14 and the beginnings of 15 made me so sad. I HATED what they did with their relationship. I HATED the way it ended. I HATED the way dean treated cas and everyone around him. It felt like the show was taking his whole character arc back to day 1. I didn’t understand. I kept watching for a couple episodes after the big argument and cas left but the luster was gone and eventually I just stopped.

I love this show. It has meant so much to me as a story. So many of the characters are/were very dear to me. I know it’s a running joke with this show about character deaths and homophobia but the strength of the bond I felt was between cas and dean gave me a lot of hope. But it wasn’t enough. I felt betrayed one too many times. And for those of you who kept watching, for whatever reason, I don’t hold it against you. It’s still a beautiful and interesting story without cas and dean’s relationship. But I just personally couldn’t do it anymore.

I hadn’t planned on watching the rest of season 15 when it came back after pandemic hiatus, at least not for awhile. So imagine my FUCKING surprise when I was doom scrolling through twitter during election week on Thursday and I see supernatural trending right along with election shit.

What.

I couldn’t stop myself, I looked and literally SCREAMED and made my boyfriend spill his wine all over our couch. I didn’t know exactly what happened as I hadn’t seen the episode but APPARENTLY all my emotions and feelings had been at least partially vindicated. So I BOUGHT season 15 so I could finish watching where I had left off. I watched 8 episodes in less than 24hrs (don’t judge me there’s a quarantine) and I LIKED them. And it might’ve been bc I knew what was about to happen in 15 x18 but I really felt like the show was getting STRONGER as it neared its finish.

I was so excited for 15x19. I read so many posts from fellow fans, destiel and antis alike. There really weren’t a lot of bad emotions running around. Everyone seemed hopeful and excited like me.

I probably don’t need to go over 15x19 emotions but im going to anyway. I was disappointed. I was confused. I was angry. we are in season 15. The last season ever for this show that has had a HUGE following of fans who have loved it, sometimes unconditionally, sometimes even though it wasn’t the best (and sometimes less than good). A season and show that had just announced YES. CAS LOVES DEAN. ITS REAL. And I shouldn’t have to go over the nuances of why we would expect more after this, with two episodes to go before the show is done forever.

But I will bc im mad af.

Like I said in the beginning. Dean’s character arc has been incredible. His emotional growth – as subtle as it might’ve seemed – has been amazing. And dean has always been an emotional, loving person. he just felt like he wasn’t because the world made him feel that way. And that’s sad, y’all. Dean deserves to realize he DESERVES happiness. And in 15x18, we were finally heading basically directly there. With destiel, yes, but even if you’re anti, what cas said to dean about who he is and why he loves him obviously struck a fucking chord with dean. It obviously changed the way he viewed himself (RE: “that’s not who I am, that’s not who we are”).

But for WHATEVER reason that’s ALL we got in 15x19. One fucking SENTENCE about dean realizing maybe he’s not just built to kill people. And then jack leaves without a single mention of Eileen or cas or Charlie or literally anyone they ever cared about and dean rode off into the sunset alone with his brother while we watched a fucking FIVE MINUTE MONTAGE that made me want to hurl my own body into the sun they were driving toward. And cas is STILL DEAD.

BUT THERE’S STILL ONE EPISODE LEFT AND FUCK ME IF I HAVENT BEEN PAINTING ON MY CLOWN MAKEUP ALL WEEK. SO WHAT DO I WANT????

ONE: DEAN DESERVES HAPPINESS. REAL HAPPINESS. What the FUCK supernatural??? Wasn’t this the whole point of his arc??? And don’t get me wrong I REALLY want that happiness to come from Cas and a real spoken relationship of some sort between them bc it also ties in with my second point but tbh just PLEASE let dean be happy. Dean is a loving person and does everything for love as we JUST FOUND OUT. Dean would NOT be happy with everyone he’s ever loved gone for the rest of his life. I just don’t believe that’s fucking true. h elp him pls.

TWO: CAS DESERVES HAPPINESS. I know we got this whole speech about “happiness isn’t in the having it’s simply in being” but like. Really. Castiel was supposed to be a throwaway character no one was supposed to care about. But we all cared SO MUCH that he lasted 11 SEASONS longer than intended and became a main character and an integral part of the story. Cas has arguably sacrificed more than anyone on this show. His last act was to sacrifice his life to save the man he loved. He knew where he was going. He knew he was finally going to be able to tell dean he loved him and then immediately be taken by the empty where we know now thanks to season 15 that everyone in there just gets to dream forever about their regrets and sadness. HOW IS THAT FAIR. HOW IS THAT A GOOD ENDING FOR CAS. HOW DO YOU EXPECT ANYONE – CHARACTERS AND FANS ALIKE –TO BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT. Its messed up, supernatural. Y’all KNOW it is and I hope to HIGH HEAVENS this is going to be corrected in 15x20.

THREE: give sam Eileen back.

Well that’s all I’ve got in me, folks. I’m absolutely and intensely dreading Thursday. Im scared and nervous and obviously still angry that this is absolutely going to be the opposite of what they promised – another “game of thrones” ending. Some of y’all are giving me hope with your posts about maybe they’re trying to keep the ending a surprise and maybe cas is coming back and how can they not and why else would they have done the second to last episode like that and I hope yall are right.

Either way, im glad I am not alone with my feelings. Thanks yall for the experience of this fandom and show. Let’s stick together on Thursday, no matter our differences.

PS stop calling jensen ackles a homophobe or ill hex you.

#supernatural #destiel #deancas #oh and #saileen #just to make sure theyre not forgotten #dean winchester #castiel #Misha Collins #jensen ackles #15x18 #15x20 #15x19 #i fucking guess #dean x castiel #casdean #castiel x dean #supernatural season 15

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elfdyke · 4 years ago

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HAHA OK UM. ivy exposition time hehe… come read my thoughts i put down in text for you all to read about what i perceive this fictional woman’s backstory to be (this is a lil more cohesive than my harley one but. YEA)

smal cw for VERY brief mentions of abuse (ivys dad + the joker r mentioned)

Ivy grew up in an emotionally vacant house. Her father was very emotionally abusive + occasionally physically. Her mother was hardly around. This caused her to have to take on a lot of responsibility for herself and basically grow up way sooner than she should have

She put a lot of effort into her schoolwork. She had a very caring and helpful science (either biology or environmental science) teacher, she nurtured Ivy’s love of botany

She got a scholarship to acclaimed college and essentially got a free ride? she worked on the side to pay for any spare expenses.

Woodrue was one of her teachers, he was academically lauded for his work in botany but hadn’t been very relevant in the recent scientific discoveries, essentially he was a big shot who got kind of washed up, but Ivy had studied his research extensively and found him incredibly inspiring.

They end up fostering a very intense relationship STRICTLY focused on their scientific research. (SHES LESBIAN.) They’re trying to prove a hypothesis Ivy’s presented about idfk.. accelerating plant growth. Harnessing toxins certain plants create for their healing properties…IDK I DON’T KNOW SCIENCE <3</p>

Their entire work relationship and all the shit they do feels like going 120 mph down a road the wrong way and she loves it. This is truly the first time she’s had full control over her own life and has someone who actually (as she believes) sees her as an equal and recognizes her intellect.

They end up escalating things because they’re both so desperate to prove Ivy’s hypothesis, and Ivy volunteers her own body for them to test their work on. She refuses Woodrue’s offer because its her theory, so she should be the one to suffer if things go wrong…

WHICH THEY DO. Shit goes sideways and Ivy experiences adverse reactions which cause her to become bed stricken (she refuses to go to the hospital because she’s afraid that the toxins could be extremely dangerous, and doesn’t want anyone to suffer because of her science).

She also tells Woodrue to keep his distance, because she wants him to be safe from it too, and he essentially just ghosts her. She’s upset about it but first blames herself because she feels like she’s done nothing but prove everyone right about what a failure she is.

She starts noticing changes affecting her, and its all kinds of fucked up. I can elaborate on this later <3. But essentially her physiology starts warping due to the green encompassing her, growing up from her hands and feet. I think the green parts of her body are cool to the touch, have a plant like texture, and MAYBE? Have plant cell structure ingrained in them vs animal cells.</p>

Also, the green initially starts slowly spreading up her body but she’s able to halt its progression, in order to lose herself completely (think of the kinda deal in annihilation, instead of sexy green plant lady ivy).

She catches wind that Woodrue had HER research published and is taking full credit for her hypothesis, without naming her whatsoever, and it essentially breaks any semblance of humanity she had left.

At this point she’s kind of crazy powerful and can control plantlife as we all know and love <3 She figures out that Woodrue is having a conference where he’s holding some kind of really important lecture on ‘his’ hypothesis, and plans to unmask his deceit in front of the entire scientific community. </p>

She also discovers that he’s warped her discovery from something she wanted to benefit humanity and the environment, to something to gain profit from, essentially going against everything she believed in.

She bursts into the conference and when she sees Woodrue, she essentially blacks out and next thing she knows she’s essentially pulled a Carrie…. NOT EVERYONE DIES!!!! But its brutal and fucked up and she 100% absolutely slaughters Woodrue and makes an example out of him. This is the point in her story where she officially loses any chance she had of her past life as Doctor Pamela Isley.

She uses his desecrated corpse to warn everyone in Gotham, in the world, that the green has woken and will no longer stand by and be desecrated by humanity.

Ivy does a lot of work trying to collapse industries that harm the environment across the world for a while but it’s also hard for her to much alone, and she almost gets bested a few times @_@ She’s absolutely a formidable threat, but she’s also one person with a massive weakness to fire

She ends up slinking back to Gotham to recover after a particularly nasty encounter

Something abhorrent happening in Gotham catches her eye and she can’t stop herself from making an appearance and attempts to wreak havoc before ultimately getting caught and shipped to Arkham for her “extremist beliefs”

Dr Harleen Quinzel is paired with her for weekly meetings.

Harley realizes very quickly Ivy is most certainly Not insane and repeatedly tries to get it appealed, but no one will listen to her. (Ivy was locked up in Arkham specifically bc of her environmental activism/terrorism)

Ivy’s very snide at Harley at first, looking down on her for being so bright eyed and bushy tailed about everything. She’s very much bitter about how she’s repeatedly been wronged, and always cast as a villain despite her believing she’s doing what she can to save the earth.

Ivy and Harley argue about if women can ever achieve anything in this world, the way its built. Harley says she’s sad ivy feels that way but knows she’s going to make a difference. She’s different and she’ll change things.

Ivy doesn’t entirely believe her but seeing someone so downright full of life and hope really does spark something in Ivy that never really dies down.

Eventually Harley gets reassigned and taken off Ivy’s case. They didn’t have a lot of time together but I think that Harley makes a worthy impact on Ivy. This is also before Harley has interacted much, if at all with the Joker

Time passes, Joker’s manipulation ensues, Harleen becomes Harley.

Ivy sees Harley Quinn during a run in with the Joker but doesn’t recognize her at first.

Until she speaks.

Ivy gets hit with a wave of nausea upon realizing how Harley’s fallen from the proud and bright girl who was sitting across from her in Arkham.

After that she uses the green to try and keep tabs on Harley and one night after a particularly bad beating, Joker kicks Harley out and Ivy manages to swoop in and rescue her from near death.

ALSO, IMPORTANT! Ivy struggles a lot with her disgust toward humanity vs her desire to protect Harley. It’s the reason it takes her a while to actively seek a hurt and broken Harley out and rescue her. (she resents herself a lot for not acting sooner, when she realizes how extensive Harley’s injuries are)

TOSSING THIS HERE . about Ivy’s sexuality. I can’t see her ever really opening herself up to any romantic relationships any time during her school life. She’s very driven and focused on her studies and her research. She never really gave her attraction to anyone much thought, so I think that she just expected she would never feel attracted to anyone? Until she meets Harley. I think that meeting Harley kind of opens her eyes like. Wait I can feel this? I deserve this kind of love? With a woman?… she has to work through some shit but she is a big lesbian in love with her weird little clown girlfriend

um i think thats all hehe…. i have more but i kinda wana write a fic about harls and ivy getting together from my interpretation so…… TUNE IN NEXT TIME <3</p>

#poison ivy #harley quinn #harlivy #dc #text #IM FEELING A LITTLE.. cwazy over them <3 #IF ANYONE HAS ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT WHAT I SAID.. or what im thinking. please engage with me..#talking about this stuff is.. EXCITING AND NICE #UM IF I MADE ANY MISTAKES OR ANYTHING.......cringe.. i am tired and i can only do so much #writing

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your-turn-to-role · 5 years ago

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hi okay i hate sending asks to people without knowing them but you seem kind so im trying: during the break, i’ve been working my way through VM, and i’m at episode 75. my question, because i’ve read some of your more recent meta, is “what’s Percy’s deal?” i know he’s loved by the fandom, but i can’t find myself relating to him, and i find his assertions that he’s the only one with a plan offputting. is there more context you can give to me about percy’s character that explains his motivations?

aww, thank you!

(and yeah, asks like this are totally fine, i totally get that anxiety, good job on sending this!)

i mean, first off, you don't have to like a character everyone else does? if you don't relate to percy you can just, not relate to percy, that's fine

(and to be fair, as much as i love him as a character, i would not want him as a friend, because he's a very flawed person that has a lot to work on, but in fiction those traits are interesting to watch rather than difficult to deal with)

but, percy's deal! the short answer is people generally like him because taliesin's funny and charismatic and he does morally grey right, which is rare and a fun thing to explore (also in his relationships with other people, the entire vex-vax-percy-keyleth square is full of neat parallels and opposites and interesting things and i have whole essays in my head on all six combos there)

i don’t know which posts you’ve read so i’ll link this one here too, just to cover a couple more of the generally unnoticed aspects of his character, and things i like about percy

he’s also far from perfect, as you’ve noted, he does tend to believe he’s the smartest person in any given room, because he’s young and clever and used to being that, which you’re allowed to find off putting, but i will say i find he does that less than a lot of characters of his general archetype? he listens to pike, he listens to keyleth, he listens to vex, he respects when they have more knowledge than him on a particular subject, he’s not above asking for help. and generally most of the arguments he has with keyleth on that subject aren’t him asserting he knows more than her, but more a matter of principles and values (they’re a really interesting pair that way, they have similar backgrounds, both children of royalty running away from the crown, but they’re such opposites. percy is a natural leader who would rather anyone rule than him, keyleth fumbles her way through all of it but sticks to it because she doesn’t want to let anyone down, percy is a pragmatist, keyleth is an idealist, they both are too focused on the big picture but in two completely different ways, i could write a whole other post on this, but to get to my point, they wouldn’t be such good balances for each other if percy didn’t absolutely respect where keyleth is coming from)

for the long answer, i’m gonna break this down into parts and try to get to the core of percy's character and why he is the way he is

(under the cut bc this gets long)

1 - heavy trauma

like... this is the really really big one. percy, at age 17 or 18, had his entire life up to that point completely destroyed. his family was killed, his friends were killed, people he trusted like family (professor anders, who was a more present figure in percy's life than his actual parents) betrayed him and helped the briarwoods, he was imprisoned in his own castle's dungeons and tortured for information, they threw his siblings' bodies in there with him to make a point, cassandra helped him escape but as far as he knew she died helping him. he has two years of his life after that he straight up doesn't remember, his hair turned white from the stress of it.

trying to go after ripley the first time didn't work, he was captured and left to starve in a prison cell, for the first few months of travelling with vox machina he genuinely believed it wasn't real, because realistically no one was gonna come save him, this was just a hallucination of his dying mind. returning to whitestone he was forced to confront the fact that literally everyone he ever knew growing up (with the sole exception of archibald) was either dead or working with the briarwoods, and even after retaking the city there's a lot that can never be repaired.

and he's just... never really dealt with any of this? like, he gave vox machina the technical details of what happened to him in the briarwood arc, because they needed to know that information, but the first time he actually started processing his trauma, the first time he admits it out loud to anyone, is the final episode of campaign one. before then it had been occasional snide or handwavey comments, and like, he'll let himself feel the anger over it (in the beginning of the story he encouraged it, because then he didn't have to feel anything else), but he's never processed the grief, never admitted to himself how badly that affected him

which means he's got a lot of pent up emotions in there that he just keeps burying, and sometimes they come out in unhealthy ways. having so much taken from him also makes him really motivated to keep the things he does have - he’s got some deep set abandonment issues and takes any kind of betrayal really badly, don’t know if you’ve got up to the scanlan stuff by the time i post this, but that’s something to keep in mind as to why he acts the way he does there. (and it’s not more explicit because percy was raised nobility, keeping a brave face through anything is part of who he is, he tends to cover emotions he’s insecure about in snark or indifference or, for the intense ones, anger, because those are the things he thinks he’s allowed to show, but the real emotions show up occasionally, when they’re particularly strong, or if you’re reading between the lines. he really does care a lot about vox machina)

2 - legacy and loyalty.

speaking of nobility, it's hard to do a character study on percy without mentioning whitestone and the house of de rolo. this is the number one thing to percy. he was raised to respect title and name, and most importantly, raised to respect the people he represents - both the townsfolk of whitestone and also percy's ancestors and future de rolo generations. whitestone is more important than any one life, he has a duty to protect and serve it, and that comes before any personal wants he may have. it's also important to him for family reasons - he was a pretty lonely child, but he loved reading about the history of the city, all the weird ghost stories whitestone had even before the briarwoods. it probably made him feel more connected to all of that, this is the place he belongs. and after his family dies, it becomes even more important, because this is his connection to them. the soul of a city lives as long as its people, by protecting what's left, he keeps a little bit of what came before

(and also in just tidbits to understand percy's character, he sees all cities and man-made things the same way - in a world where some races live for centuries or millennia, their history exists mostly by word of mouth, you can physically talk to people who were around 500 years ago and get their take on things - humans don't have that, they get 100 years at most, so the things they build are vital to their heritage. this is how you keep people alive long after they're gone, by honouring what they created. and especially for someone so concerned with legacy and history, percy literally says abandoning westruun would be blasphemy, because the place people grew up is important, yes it's better that they live, but letting the city be abandoned and destroyed would be an irreparable act of violence.)

this is the number one thing on percy's mind when evaluating anything about himself, where do i come from, and what do i leave behind? which is a question that has a lot of moments to be tested, because of my next point...

3 - pragmatism and terrible thoughts

when it comes down to it, percy is a very ends justify the means kind of person. he finds it very easy to square away any kind of collateral damage as long as it gets him to his end goal. see: trial of the take, where he's fine to catch his friends in the blast radius of a new bomb design because he's so excited that it worked, preparing to fight vorugal and resigning himself to potentially having to kill innocent people to kill the dragon (he wasn’t okay with that, but he would do it), also his conscious decision to let ripley go, knowing she would lead to the deaths of thousands because it was her or the briarwoods and he wanted revenge

(this is by his own admission his lowest point and worst mistake, because as mentioned, he thinks about the consequences of his actions near constantly, he knew she would reproduce his guns and they would lead to a whole new form of warfare. but in that moment he was just blinded by grief and way too emotionally burnt out and did not have the capacity to care. and he spends the rest of the campaign and honestly probably the rest of his life trying to make up for that one)

he's also, by his own admission, someone who has a lot of bad thoughts he doesn't act on, he's very clever and creative and ideas for ways to use those skills for violence or vengeance come easily to him (like, percy as an actual villain would be ripley but worse, ripley's intelligent but a very direct point a to point b kind of thinker, percy has multiple times criticised her lack of imagination, a percy with her lack of morals would be terrifying)

(honestly this is why i was seeing percy so much in taliesin's narrative telephone, because "sometimes i wake up having dreamed of a terrible thing, and normally i just file that away for things that i would never do, because i wanna maintain friendships, but then LIAM did something to me." and the whole being absolutely fine with throwing the rest of the cast under the bus just to enact revenge on liam was quintessential percy)

but we’ve seen the pragmatic anti hero everywhere, anyone can be a terrible person, and have reasons for it, that alone doesn’t make an interesting character (at least not for me)

what does, is my last point

4 - trying to be good

i still vividly remember when i first watched campaign one, being really surprised at how much percy asked for help? like, i went in expecting the usual full on demon possession storyline, i expected percy to hide how bad it was, i expected him to make poor decisions without realising he was doing it until he was in too deep to back out

and like, he had some of that. but at the first sign of things being out of his control, he asked his friends for help. he let pike greater restoration him. he told vax to kill him if things ever got too out of hand. he was really, genuinely scared about what he got himself into and what he might do because of it. there was never a point where he pretended, even to himself, that making a deal with orthax was okay. the minute he realised there was a demon involved, he was working to stop it. and yeah, by the time he realised it was already a bit too late, there were already some things out of his control (and also taliesin kept having the worst rolls against the whitestone corruption which was really fun on a meta level), which is how things got as bad as they did. but honestly, all things considered, there’s very little to criticise about the way percy handled himself in the briarwood arc.

and he keeps doing that, trying to get better. he struggles with it, he struggles a lot, against his anger issues, against all the trauma, against the fact that he really doesn’t want to be here and things would be so much easier if he were dead. but he recognises he holds grudges too easily, so he starts actively trying to forgive those who’ve wronged him (this is something he and vex have in common, and something they were working on together before they were together, which probably helped a lot in getting them to that point as well). he recognises he makes poor decisions when he’s angry, so he starts learning to step back in those moments and leave the decisions to someone else. he has never not owned up to his mistakes, he takes responsibility for everything he’s done, and if he notices a problem he can’t solve himself, he asks for help.

and i find that fun to explore. like, percy’s been likened to hamlet in the actual show, and i was the kid who got super obsessed with hamlet when i was like 15 because i was in that same mental space of suicidal self hatred and existential melancholy but also thinking i was the smartest person in any given room and being too young to have gotten over the arrogance that makes you ignore everyone else’s needs for the sake of indulging your own problems. and then i got older and realised there are smarter ways to go about things, like having empathy and appreciating the light in the world and not being a dickhead to people because it makes you feel better, and maybe hamlet can be justified and in the wrong at the same time. and while there’s some stuff i won’t spoil for you, percy after ripley kills him is definitely starting to learn that, which you rarely see in the hamlet archetype, bc everyone’s like “ah yes so Deep so Important who cares what bad things this person did they had Trauma and are Clever”

well, percy cares about the bad things he did, and cares about not doing those anymore. so like, he’s still a disaster of a person bc he’s like 23 and no one has their life together at 23, especially not someone in percy’s situation, and honestly i find that fun to watch as well bc i like watching characters make stupid mistakes and do stuff i’d never approve of in real life, and as i mentioned at the start, taliesin makes captivating and funny characters. but yeah, that’s generally where percy’s at, most of the time

#would you believe me if i said this was the second shorter attempt at answering this ask?#i honestly tried to pare it down but this hit at least 6 or 7 separate essays in my head that all wanted to be included #and then i had to figure out how to combine them #my brain keeps giving me more things i should add but i think this is enough to be going on with for now 😂#but hey anyone who likes listening to me talk about percy know i can keep going #this is my word MINIMUM #(and it's still over 2k im so sorry)#but yeah hope this helped!#cr1 #percy de rolo #cr thoughts #text #meta #ask #megabees3

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wolfcha1k · 4 years ago

Text

All I Can Think About

"One look and I can't catch my breath Two souls into one flesh When you're not next to me I'm incomplete 'Cause I'm on fire like a thousand suns I couldn't put it out even if I wanted to These flames tonight Look into my eyes and say you want me, too Like I want you"

"All my life I've been looking for a place my parents wanted me to find, and I found it… but now? All I can think about is Eep. My best friend, my first… and only love."

Guy and Eep reflect on what has happened in the wake of these two crazy moons since their Tomorrow was challenged. There's damage that needs to be fixed and broken hearts to mend.

Post!A New Age /// Guy x Eep /// hope you like kisses man, this is like 80 percent smooching time

You can also read it here on ao3 or FF.net: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29545320 https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13822786/1/All-I-Can-Think-About

I need to stop working backwards on the timeline but oh well. You can't convince that Guy wasn't fussing over Eep the moment they were alone after the events of the spiny mandrilla. Also tbh this was just an excuse to practice more kissing scenes, bc I know you all are secretly heathens

The moment Guy saw a chance to get away from the Pack he took it, quickly grabbing for Eep's hand to pull her down a random direction into the garden. She started in surprise before willingly following him with a trust Guy didn't feel he deserved anymore after last night. Guy didn't stop until he felt they were far enough away that nobody would find them without looking very hard, hidden behind some of the large gourds and corn.

He spun around to face her, letting out a long sigh. Guy just needed a moment to look at her, dark eyes worried and concerned as the adrenaline of what happened just a few hours ago finally seeped out of his body. Guy was covered in bruises and ached all over but it was nothing compared to the pain of when he thought he lost her forever three times in the span of just two terrifying days of his life. Somehow The End of the World felt miniscule in comparison now that Eep was his world.

His Tomorrow.

He rested his shaky hands on her shoulders, relief making him dizzy. Eep supported the sudden slumping of his weight, her green eyes wide with concern. "Guy! What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm fine," he said, a tired smile on his face as he looked at her.

She held him up by the arms before lifting him up into hers. Eep sat down on the grass and positioned him on her lap, stroking the fringe of hair away from his face.

She could see the swollen purple bruises on his cheek and the black eye he had, his lower lip looked swollen and puffy. "You had a bad day," she sighed, cuddling him close.

"Yeah," he managed to chuckle, finding some amusement out of her words. "But it's better now that you're here…" He pressed a tired, sloppy kiss to her shoulder and rested his forehead there after. "Empathis on the better."

She just tugged him closer, as if her arms could squeeze the exhaustion and nerves right out of him. "I'm sorry," Eep suddenly said, muffling her face against his cheek. He felt moisture against his skin and the slight tremor in her arms and shoulders. "I'm really sorry."

Her warbled words cut him like a knife and he used his head to nudge her back so he could look at her. He could see the beginnings of tears on her eyelashes, gaze watery as she blinked it away stubbornly. Guy reached his hand to touch her face, feeling her recoil a bit before relaxing into his palm. He wiped his thumb under her eye, catching a tear.

He realized his own eyes felt moist all of a sudden, it'd been an emotionally charged couple of days. "It's okay, Eep. You didn't do anything wrong, I was just so stupid."

She sighed heavily, unwinding an arm from around his body so she could cover his hand with her calloused palm. Eep said nothing for several long moments, just clutched his hand like a life line.

"Eep?"

Eep finally looked at him, tearing her eyes from the random direction she'd sent her sights towards. "Yeah?"

"You're not hurt, are you?" Guy sat up a bit in her lap, cautiously letting his palms trace her broad shoulders, fingers squeezing tentatively to see if she would flinch. He knew she was good at hiding things like injuries, nursing them in private as to avoid upsetting Grug, it'd also extended to him now. She was strong but that didn't mean he wasn't allowed to worry over her.

"No, I don't have a scratch on me," she assured him but Guy didn't stop checking her. Eep let him fuss though, knowing it would make him feel better if he came to the conclusion himself. His touch felt nice though, Eep realizing how starved she was for it since being separated from each other.

He touched her back, her arms, her ribs, anywhere his hands could reach in a modest way, careful in his examination. After running a hand down her leg, his eyes fell to where the prohestic was once on her pinkie toe. "I'm so, so glad you actually don't have a toe there," he sighed, knowing it was one of the most nonsensical, bizarre phrases he'd ever uttered in his seventeen years of life.

"Guess getting bit by that bearyena came in handy for once," Eep quipped, trying to lighten the mood a little.

He also was relieved she hadn't been ripped in half during the struggle, it had to be a miracle of some kind. Guy didn't voice this though, just traced his hands slowly back up her body so he could hold her waist. He missed her so much and he was quick to show her that, words failing him as he gently brushed her lips in a kiss. He let his hands slide up her back to lovingly stroke her shoulders, feeling the muscles ripple under his palms. She shivered and he shook, he pulled her closer as if to warm them both but still the trembling never stopped.

He always did love her shoulders and muscles, the clinical and practical part of him admired the strength and power there, how they could flex and be used to take down beasts twice her size. Then there was the simplicity of just being a man who loved a beautiful woman and it inspired a different kind of appreciation in him.

One that he knew Grug who absolutely skewer him alive for, his heart longing and aching as he hugged Eep. He never knew he could be so needy, it should have been pathetic as a puppy following its master for attention, never satisfied.

They'd shared an intense kiss over the raging flames but it still wasn't enough after the longest dry spell he had ever known since meeting her. After that first kiss in the ocean, he never got enough of her now. He was greedy and never was ashamed of that when it came to loving her.

He only wanted to be with her until there were no more Tomorrows that crossed the sky.

Eep quickly cupped his face in her hands and surged forward against him, her ferocity taking him by surprise. He practically squeaked when he felt the nip of her teeth on his bruised lip but somehow he couldn't care less. Just welcomed it, tilting his head and taking in the taste of her as he brushed her tongue with his. It was like fire and he was more than happy to be burned, letting Eep fly with him like the wild tiger in his stories.

He drew away a moment, just the slightest breath away as he spoke, pressing a few rapid kisses to her lips with each word. "You." Kiss. "Have." Kiss. "No idea." Kiss. Kiss. "How much I missed you," Guy finished in a rush, breathless as he lowered his head to trail a series of kisses down the column of her throat, grazing his teeth lightly on the skin of her collarbone.

There was a hitch in her breath at the affection. "Can't be more than I missed you."

He went to nuzzle her ear, placing a chase kiss on her earlobe. Eep arched into him and he clutched her tight as if she were water slipping through his fingers. "I thought I was going to die seeing you up there," Guy uttered in a strained voice. He could picture it so clearly, seeing her leaping and bounding across skeletal remains hanging precariously from old tendrils of vine. The spiny mandrilla closed on her heels and he could do nothing but watch, screaming her name out in desperation until his throat went raw. "I screwed up and almost didn't get to fix it."

Guy felt Eep nudge his head away from her so they could look at each other properly again. She just traced her thumb over his cheek, tender as she marked one of his hand print shaped bruises. "You saved me," she finally said, leaning forward to steal a kiss, smiling against his lips as they brushed, once, twice and finally a proper one that had Guy's toes curling and his head fuzzy. "I was so happy when I saw you again, Guy."

He'd been more than shocked to have seen Eep and the others arrive, riding Chunky and a pack of wolfspiders. He had practically given his last rights, resolving painfully he would never see her again, never fix what he had done to her. His first and only love, he didn't need to meet any other girls to know what he felt was real and it was more than just a beautiful teenage romance.

"You want to talk about heroics? How many people come swooping in on a tiger and take on a giant monster single handedly," Guy pressed his forehead against hers, awed by her courage and humbled by her love for him. "And here I picked a tree over you."

"It wasn't just a tree," she lightly scolded him much to his surprise. "I get it now."

Guy felt moisture collect on his eyelashes and without another thought, closed the distance between them once more. He let his hands roam, touching every part of her out of fear he would forget how warm and solid her body felt in his arms. It was almost like a dream, eyes shut tightly and listening to the soft little gasps in her breath, the way her chest heaved against his own. He hated needing to breathe when all he wanted was this, reluctantly pulling away as he felt light headed, exhilarated and breathless.

"Never again," he promised her, nuzzling his nose against hers. Eep practically purred at the loving attention, letting her palms rest on his shoulders to gently knead the tension there. He shuddered, forehead pressed into hers, knowing the gesture meant so much more than simple touch to her. "I'd rather chop off both my legs than lose you again. Please never scare me like that, I couldn't bare it."

She kissed his lips, gentle before in all her passionate nature, looped her arms around his neck and kissed him enough that Guy was convinced he'd forget his own name.

But that was okay, because she reminded him, pulling away. "Guy, I love you," she only said, beaming at him.

"Please say it again," he pleaded.

"I love you."

He felt his eyes growing glassy again and Eep kissed a tear away from below his eye, soft and tender. He smiled at her, embracing her tightly once more from his comfortable position in her lap. "I love you more," he murmured, kissing her shoulder.

"I love you more," she protested, lightly shoving him to nibble his ear, feeling his weight push into her.

"No, I said I love you more first."

"And I'm telling you I love you more right back," she purred, lifting her neck to give him better access to her jawline when he started to press an open mouth kiss there.

He felt her pulse rush under his lips like she'd ran a marathon, skin flushed as red as her hair. He couldn't help but kiss her again and again.

"You're so stubborn," he grumbled good naturedly, nuzzling her.

"Takes one to know one, babe." Eep grinned at him, stroking the nape of his neck and fiddling with his top knot.

It was just them now and feeling thrilled that he had her to himself, gently nudged her down, feeling her eyes bore into his. Guy braced his arms above her, not caring his muscles throbbed in protest. He could see the sun as it set shimmering there, burning with more than mere fire.

Her eyes were nearly amber in the low light of the evening, glinting with love. Those same eyes reminded him of the first night they met, curious and glowing as the fire flickered. He touched her face, fingers curling under her chin, taking in her flushed cheeks and kiss swollen lips. It was a good look for her. She was beautiful, and no amount of sleeping suns in the sky would ever compare.

There must have been something in his expression for he saw her tremble and emotion swelled within him as he shut his eyes. He ached in more ways than just the pain from the ordeal with getting pummeled by a bunch of punch monkeys.

No more words were spoken for a long time, whoever reached for whom first he didn't care. All that mattered was now she was in his arms, heart pressed against heart and the gentle whispers of breath against lips. She arched into him and it took all his might to remember how to breathe. She palmed his shoulder suddenly with a growl, pushing him beneath her and he didn't fight her.

No one and no thing would ever separate them again, he thought as he caught her lips once more in a fluid movement.

[scene break]

Grug had panicked when he realized Guy and Eep had disappeared. After today, who could really blame him for it? Everyone was quick to volunteer to find them, Ugga crouching to encourage Sandy to use that skilled sense of smell of hers. The fierce little tot bounded into the fields, disappearing into the tall grass and crops.

"She's got the scent!" Gran exclaimed, hobbling after her youngest granddaughter.

Grug just worried and worried, Ugga absently massaging a kink out of his large neck. "Relax, the farm is safe. I'm sure Eep and Guy are alright, Grug."

"Still," he began with a frown. "I'd feel better knowing that with my own eyes, honey."

They'd followed Sandy through the gardens, the farther they went the more Grug fretted. It felt too long when Sandy finally paused, several large bushes and crops shielding the view. She pawed in the direction of it, turning to giggle and pounce into Ugga's awaiting arms.

"Good girl, Sandy," she praised, pressing her cheek against hers fondly.

Grug lead the way, parting the foliage. Everyone shoved about behind him and attempted to peak around him, making the caveman huff in annoyance.

The family came upon the couple hidden amongst the fields of other worldly produce, cozy together on the grass as they traded needy little kisses. Alternating between whispering, giggling and pressing a small kiss here or there, Guy and Eep were content in their bubble. Guy was curled up as content as a house cat right in her lap, Eep's arms around him in a hug. The sight would have infuriated Grug once upon a time ago but he'd seen a lot in just two days.

Things changed and so did he. His daughter deserved happiness and having seen just how broken Guy had been over her, he knew it wasn't just puppy love.

It was full grown.

"Aw," Dawn gushed as she peeked over Grug's shoulders, standing on her tiptoes. "How cute, are they always like that?"

The typical young boy that he was, Thunk made a face, his travel window lowering. "Bleh," he only said. "Again already?"

Gran snorted and leaned over to Dawn to say inconspicuously, "You have no idea, smart girl."

Belt's only response from around Dawn's torso was to make a swooning gesture, unwinding an arm to drape it over his face. Dawn chuckled when immediately after the sloth was gushing over Sash who'd leaned down to nuzzle noses with Guy's little friend. "I get the picture."

Hope folded her hands to her chest, "I can't believe we tried breaking them up… who does that?"

The words Hope said affected Grug more than he wanted to admit and guilt swelled inside him.

Ugga patted him gently on the shoulder, rousing her mate's quiet contemplation. "Well?" Ugga asked him in that soft voice of hers, gray eyes shifting back towards Guy and Eep.

"Leave them be," Grug told her and the others, shaking his head with a reserved little smile. He felt sad but there was a fatherly resolve in his heart. Eep would always be his little girl but he had to accept she had her own life to live now.

One with many Tomorrows that he knew Guy could give her, there was no doubt the young man was going to give her the world on a silver platter. The thought of her leaving was like a knife in his heart, even Guy would be a tough bone to swallow, after all, Grug had called him son. And as a father, he only wanted what was best for them, even if it meant it wasn't here with him anymore.

Gran stomped her cane on the grass. "Who are you and what have you done with our Lunkhead?"

Grug grunted, "What? I'm not allowed to have a change of heart now?"

Ugga leaned her head against his fondly. "I'm proud of you, big guy."

Grug didn't want to get emotional, feeling the moisture gather in his eyes. Phil threw an arm over his shoulders on the side Ugga didn't occupy.

"Something on your mind, bro?" His eyes were sympathetic.

He sniffled, "Nothing, really." Grug shrugged Phil's arm off and sighed.

"You can tell me," Phil encouraged, lifting a hand in an encouraging manner.

"I don't wanna."

"I'm knocking on the door, big guy. Let me in!" He persisted.

Grug side eyed him, knowing no matter what he said the lanky Betterman was going to get his way. "It's just… gonna be hard to let them go," he said, the words slightly warbled. He was a big scary caveman but he'd always been soft in the heart despite the stoney exterior.

Gran scoffed, the old matriarch beginning to hobble away. "There's our Grug now. The big baby."

Phil patted him on the back, "There, there, it'll be alright. Besides, I have a solution to your little problem."

He looked uncertain as Phil led him away from the serene couple, the rest of the family following behind. "What do you mean 'solution'?"

"Let's just say it's a wedding present for our favorite pair of lovebirds, Gruggers. You can help me get it ready, they'll take one look at it and want to stay forever." Phil then fondly nudged his friend's back. "Just please learn to use doors, Guy won't be happy if you tear a hole in their little love nest. Knocking will save you a lot of grief too"

"Love nest?" Grug echoed and for a moment the protective father that wanted to smother his daughter peeked out.

Before he could regret his decision, it was a joint effort to shove him towards the large tree on the property, hefting a sigh and pouting as Ugga just laughed.

And oblivious to the world around them, Guy and Eep stayed stuck together, joint by the heart.

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selfcareparker · 4 years ago

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yesss the letter format 💝💓💘💖💞💕💖💞💓 (lovely anon)

my dearest aria (a hamilton reference lmao),

i’m home alone (bc i wanted the house alone to get my head together after my brothers were mean to me 🙃) and i’m so hype LMAO but i’m watching chloe x halle’s tiny desk concert and honestly just vibing. (this is so random) besides zendaya like they are my badass black women role models. my one accomplishment would be to learn to body roll like them LMAO

oh nevermind i can’t have anything nice, my dad just came home 🙃 WHAT A WAY TO START OFF THIS ASK WTFFF

i’m liking tfatws, the second episode was veryyy intense imo but WANDAVISION IS SO GOOD😭 i knew it was going to be my favorite from the really old trailer but it’s really good and i promise it’s not just sitcoms, girl especially cuz you’ll have all the episodes already out- we were having to wait every week😭 BUT ITS SO GOOD I PROMISE HDJSHDJSH lmao reading this i was like “i- the episodes aren’t an hour long” but i feel that, it’s hard for me to watch tfatws bc they are an hour long and i’m like 😐 but wandavision episodes are less than 30mins bc I KID YOU NOT they have the damn 10 MINUTE CREDITS DHDJSJ no i don’t think we’ve talked about this b4 lol but it all depends on the series for me. i binged love island uk in less than a week bc i was so invested and LITERALLY LOVE IT but uh those episodes are like an hour and a half, but say i was binging tfatws (it’s so hard to type that ohmigosh) i honestly would not be able to do it bc of the intensity (you may be like what intensity but if you’ve seen episode 2 by the time you’re reading this.......... isaiah and the scene afterwards is all i have to say, esp me being black it was so tough :/)

girl you’re fine, as long as you’ve experienced it once hahaha i think the reason why it’s so important to my family (this letter feels so personal and extreme HSJSJA IM SORRY) is bc my grandmother loved it and in my family i guess it’s just important to us lol like my mom and dad love it too and we have the literal VHS tapes LMAO, but it only came up recently cuz my youngest brother was watching lion guard HAHA and he wanted to see the originals :) and fun fact (unless you already know) but there’s a lion king part 2 and 1 1/2 and i have all three ON VHS HAHAHA but i love lion king 1 duh (the og) but part two’s music and love story..... is so good. anyway. 🦁

I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING DURING THE WHOLE MOVIE THEATER ENCOUNTER THING HAHAHA AND WHEN SHE WAS SAYING AWKWARD I WAS LIKE WTF THE NOISE LMAOOOO i don’t think there’s a better way to describe that whole situation than ZKDHDJSHAJAJSHDJSNAHA. yeah. yeaaaa at the cinemas (i like the word cinema more than movies 🥰) here they have chips (fries), some have ice cream, nachos, drinks, hot dogs, the cinema we were at had pretzels and like BURGERS I WAS LIKE HUH OKAY and ya know obviously popcorn but i don’t know why the theaters (or cinemas) here do that, it started a long time ago though like yearsssss

PLEASE i have the longest movie watchlist and uhh haven’t seen any of them JDJSKA (istg i use HSJSSKSH as a period - like . ) i’m still hype for cherry but very hesitant (idk if i can handle it) but i’m thinking about watching it in the next couple of weeks? i know it’ll take me forever bc i’m gonna have to keep pausing and shit but idk. i’ve asked around for very specific trigger warnings and time stamps so i REALLY know what’s coming (even if it spoiled the film a bit for me) but i do really wanna see it (i think? writing this now i’m not so sure lol) so whooooooo really knows lol, but chaos walking YES i was really excited about it :))) and about my friend uhh dude you don’t sound mean at all i was literally thinking the same thing but worse HAAKL idk what she was there for???? she bought my ticket tho so 💁🏾‍♀️ whatever

“SIMS ahh, BUNK BEDS ahh” had me cracking up lmao and you know my sims status JAJAHHAJ but i’m gonna become like you, saving every 5 minutes 😭 but that’s exactly what happened to me, i really didn’t know whether to shut it off or not but after 2 hours i was heartbroken lol i’m literally making a list of things i need to redo that wasn’t saved lmao

CAN I JUST SAY UR A MASTERMIND THOUGH??? UR SIMS GAME SOUNDS SO *chefs kiss* IM CRINE university is PAINFULLY long and LITERALLY I FEEEL THAT like you can’t do anything else without failing, i had my sim go to a party once for like a few hours and i felt so dumb afterwards like urgh he should’ve been studying LMAOO just cracking down on work honestly. UR NEIGHBOR!AU IN THE SIMS PLEASEEE i am very much in love with it, yes. (pouring rain has just suddenly begun where i am rn wow ok) i love that you put them on the same lot, that was really really smart and i love that ur living out your sexuality in the sims😭 i was abt to say “now you can say you’ve got experience bc of the sims” but ANYWAY IGNORE ME fhdhs THE ALIEN BABY DHSJSK i hope it’s not a dealbreaker for enisa. that’d be tragic. IM BACK IN UPPERCASE THO BC YES MAKING OUT IN THE SIMS IS SO HOT TO ME??? I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE STFU OH MY GOSH- all the stuff, whispering sweet nothings, and the making out, and JUST ALL OF IT!!! AM I TOUCH STARVED????? there was this time i made my sim just continue to woohoo bc it was turning me on big time. ANYWAY

half way through that i had to go to my grandmothers house (not the one that likes lion king, but uh hmm idk if you remember but i was talking abt my shit family so yeah that grandmother lol) so now i’m finishing this 🥴 and instead of chloe x halle i’m watching a tom interview lmao & if this takes me longer than 30 minutes.... imma cry

I REALLY WANNA ASK- IS IT BC UR GERMAN LIKE YOU CAN JUST WRITE OUT THAT LONG ASS WORD???? i mean i can’t write out supercalafrag- anyway, but that word is a bit nonsense, UR WORD IS A REAL WORD DUDE HDJSHS i love how ur like “maybe i mixed up these words” YEA OK.

lol i had to google what are waveformers lol (lol makes a comeback) and they look like curlers that you would sleep in (here we would call them curlers or uhm i forgot uhhhhhhh rollers i think) but ur fine when am i ever making sense?? i think the best part about these is the chaos yet we understand what the other means 😌

H20 H20 H20 OH MY GOODNESS SHE BROUGHT UP H20 OK MY LIFE WAS H20🥲 I HAVE THEIR LOCKET NECKLACE AND (short storytime) when i was younger i thought they were american despite their accents (idk i was dumb) but then i figured they weren’t when lewis went to go study in america HAHAH ALSO FAVORITE COUPLE CLEO AND LEWIS UGH WATCH ME REWATCH THE SHOW NOW THANKS (also i hated elizabeth so much) but anyway back on topic, when lewis went to go study in the US i looked up where the show took place and all that good stuff and i found out they were australian HAHAH and that started my obsession with accents LMAO the uk :’)) (i’m proofreading AND AUSTRALIA IS NOT A PART OF THE UK LMAOO IM SOO DHSJSSHS) also it is now one of my many goals (besides the body roll HAHAH) to go to mako island (that’s what it’s called right??)

about music, i googled stormzy and i might listen to a song of his.. LOL I WANNA GIVE IT A TRY IMMA DO IT FOR YOU NFDVSFSG lmaoo the german rapper had me cackling (autocorrect once again being helpful and said raper and i’m like nOO) i mean we all have that one person. can’t lie, won’t lie. my one (IM SORRY BUT AUTOCORRECT HAD “MY ONE TRUE ACCOMPLISHMENT” SITTING AND READY HDJSJA I DONT EVEN TYPE THAT wHAT) person out of my white soft boy with brown hair and brown eyes type would beeeee pete davidson. love me some petey. i was gonna say rex orange county as well lmao but i don’t really loveeee him i’m just in love with his music... and wanna be friends with him..... so 👉🏾👈🏾 (i never do that fdshsh)

oh my goodness, i love tattoos too- GASP what are you thinking of getting 🥺 i want tattoos too but i’m too indecisive to figure out what to have & where. especially in my family... idk they aren’t frowned upon but my mom’s not applauding the thought lol, if i got one it would have to be meaningful but i am absolutely in love with (for example) ariana grande’s finger tattoos !! they’re so cute and simple :’) i don’t even know if i can get tattoos? my skin is... interesting. not in a bad way!! just like.... idk how to explain it??? keyloids run in the family & i got a piercing once and it got infected soo :/ the doctor also confirmed that if i wanted tattoos they couldn’t be in color so LMAO

ONCE AGAIN THIS WHOLE THING FEELS SO TMI DHSHSSJ IM LIKE OHMIGOSH SHUT UP SHE DOESNT CARE JESJSKS

in regards to you not sleeping, i wanted to mention that dumb bird, what was the reason it was up so early aT 4AM???? SIR WHO YOU CALLING TO??? also it’s 11:30pm and idk why i’m tired???

yeah i was never SUPER into justin so i don’t know exactly what albums you’re talking about lol, i do know yummy though.. but everyone did hahaha also i listen to so much pop 🙈 i mean maybe... idk what would count as pop and what wouldn’t. that new person feeling though.. i get that. it’s like who is this new person..? i kinda feel like that with taylor swift (i was never THAT into her either though so it’s like oh wait i didn’t know you from the beginning instead of hello old friend but you’re different lol)

about the concerts, thanks 🥰🥰 that’s so sweet what you did for your mom too, it’s nice seeing them so happy like 🥲 awh AND GLEE IS AND WAS MY LIFE FOR A V V LONG TIME, i’ve been meaning to rewatch it for the longest time lmaooo but i’m just so lazy and it’s such a commitment... i’ll have to get emotionally involved again and idk if i want that rn. but i have a friend on instagram and she runs a glee fan account and it’s such a big part of her life i really don’t think i could ever be THAT obsessed with something. like another one of my friends loves tom holland so much that she changed her mom’s name in her phone to what tom’s mom’s name is in his phone (that was confusing lol) and obviously i’m not judging them AT ALL, it just couldn’t be me lol

CONCERTS LOOK LIKE SO MUCH FUN 😩😩 LIKE THE EXPERIENCE AND THE FEELINGGG URGHSJS i wanna see a few people live like ari and chloe x halle and- hmm.... idk who else FJDSJ rex orange county i guess huh anyway, the experience just sounds so amazing and the atmosphere is just ✨✨✨ yeah

aria do it do it do it do it do it- watch hamilton!! but with subtitles bc you won’t catch half of the things they’re saying without them LMAO (me and my family watched it and they all didn’t like it bc they didn’t know what was happening lol) BUT DONT WATCH IT AT 4AM LMAO ITS LITERALLY 3 HOURS LONG

yes!! superior peter fics 🥺🥺🥺🥺 and it just shows how much of an incredible writer AND PERSON you are through your fics that you can turn a blurb into 2k....... like what.

LMAO the annoying thing, sometimes i feel like i’m bothering people (like right now HAHAH) but i think it’s my antisocial side being like yeaa no one wants to talk to you like you wanna talk to them :’) idk it’s strange!! sometimes i get really ✨insecure✨ and overthink everything LOL like is this too long, im talking too much, i’m swearing too much, oh lord i’m a pain, all that good shit lmao so that’s fun:))

ALSO YOUR BLOG IS SO FUN TO ME HAHAK LIKE ITS JUST YOUR OWN AND I LOVE THAT!!! like you talk about everything and anything on here lol,, and i say that bc what you said lmao how if i was someone else i would want to fuck me so bad😭 i honestly don’t understand how i don’t have people lining up though..... but if no one’s gonna tell you... then you tell yourself, period (and sometimes telling yourself is fucking yourself HSHAJKS OK NEXT)

ohmigosh the realization you had that you graduated last year and are going to uni this year🤧 but the fact that you had a teacher who LEFT THE GROUP CHAT bc she was mad at y’all i- 😭 but yeah about your maths (i always wondered why you guys call it maths and the US calls it math. like i know so many people out of the states, not just in the uk that say maths) teacher- i saw this post that said online school is looking a lot like dora the explorer😭😭 “you have any questions?” 🦗 “okay bye then” lmao and please i love when tests have nothing to do with what you studied like ??? thanks? sometimes i get scared that my teacher will somehow find out that i googled everything? or like my answer is too close to the answer sheet or something. i get sooo nervous lol but i’m already past that point of not being able to do anything myself DHJS i mean i’m still learning like i said!! read the question, read the answer. boom. now i know the answer to the question and i learned!

THANKS 🙈🥰🤧 idk how else to explain my feelings LMAO i feel it’s cool that you find my dance lessons and voice lessons cool so thanks :’)

oh god not headache season 😭😭 allergies are the worst like it’s not even funny. is headache season just when the seasons are changing or is it like... all throughout the summer? cuz i love the summer lmaoo i love the winter too but i just love wearing as little clothes as possible LMAO

GIRL IF THAT BIRD DONT STOP CHIRPING- i am 100% convinced that it is the same bird trying to give you headaches and no sleep and it needs to stfu 😤 and pLEASE ur theme is adorable and pretty and cute but also it just feels like you? idk if i’m explaining this right or if it’s bc i’ve been talking to you for a bit but it’s cute but not innocent in a way that i’m surprised that you write smut and- yeah, that didn’t make sense!! but ur new theme is gonna look pretty too and as long as you like it, it’ll be amazing🥰

yessssss the fact that megan is gonna be ur pfp YES JUST YES

edit: ok i just need to 🥺😭 sometimes u make me wanna cry cuz i feel like you’re just a kind person. i truly mean this, the fact that you celebrate yours & others stretch marks makes me so 🥺🥺🥺 i honestly don’t know anyone who has said they want need more stretch marks and it’s just all very lovely to me :’)) OKAY IMMA STOP BEING SAPPY

#yes my fake tags are back #by popular demand #aka me #and look i have actual tags this time! #i’m seriously craving water ice rn....... huh #but it’s past midnight and i fr fr want a snack #aw man #i wrote that last paragraph while doing my tags yes #and i hope you become responsible for that anon’s orgasm #assuming they had one #and i saw your response to the tom thing and yeaa when they only look like that for something and it’s like aw bae be yourself #i’m gonna shut up now and find a snack but goodnight!! morning?? IDK #IF THESE TAGS END UP AS ACTUAL TAGS I AM SO SORRY HAHAHA #alright proofreading done and i’m gonna go eat cereal

okay i‘m on my way to a driving lesson rn and afterwards i have a zoom uni thing, and then another uni thing lmao. but hopefully i can reply to this in between because i‘ve been dying to talk to you since i got this ask dldjds💘💘💘 (i really like this heart. i had a 💖 phase for a while and now it‘s 💘 (seems like a very romantic heart but.... it is what it is idk dkddj)

^okay that was literally all i wrote before my lesson lmfao. just had the worst driving lesson ever dbdvsnylkxsksj i think i‘ve gotten too used to being good at driving and now i‘ve gotten too cocky with it 🥴 anyway i‘ve had such a stressful day and overall week but tbh i‘m already feeling better bc i can (indirectly) talk to you <333

omg i went to chloe or halle (i don‘t remember who out of the two)‘s instagram the other day and found out that they are not twins alejeleksjsksj but yes oh my god their voices are literally angelic and i can‘t wait to see Halle as Ariel (Arielle??)🥰 and omg it‘s literally 2021 and we‘ve only had......... one(?) black Disney Princess like it‘s about fucking time (I might be forgetting someone, I‘m not too familiar with the new Disney films, but as far as I remember there‘s only Tiana right? (who is literally a frog for 3/4 of the film 😭😭) so yes i‘m here for it too😌😌😌 (obviously she‘s not a cartoon like tiana ekdlek but she‘s a disney princess you know what i mean ddkjdh)

pfkejdj i‘m already overwhelmed with my parents i can‘t imagine having siblings too 😭😭 (sometimes i wish i had siblings but then other times (like after reading what you wrote dksjj) i‘m glad that i‘m an only child lmao like your brothers being mean to you and i remember when you cried and he was just like 👁👄👁 ok. like i’m totally okay being an only child sksjsj———and he doesn‘t listen to music 🤧🤧🤧 (although i guess that‘s good for you because at least he can‘t annoy you by listening to loud music that you hate dmdn)

okay okay i might watch wandavision then??? I‘ll definitely let you know!!! and yes omg i‘m loving tfatws (that really is so fucking hard to type omg) but same i totally get what you mean, i‘m not used to watching action series at all and every episode so far has been like a little movie so i‘m glad that i didn‘t wait until it was all out cause there’s no way i could binge watch that lol) and yes last episode was really intense. i‘m glad that marvel are talking about racism because (from what i‘ve seen) they haven‘t been the best in that department, and i‘m really curious to see what they‘ll do in the next episodes (curious isn‘t the right word but excited isn‘t the right wort either, like i‘m excited but in a neutral way ? i‘ll shut up dslsksj i hate that german has so many words that you cant translate because theres a really good german word that describes how i’m feeling but i cant think of a good translation ugh)

okay i absolutely need to watch lion king (and part 2 and 1/ 1/2 dksksj) AND hamilton, i might even do it soon 👀

BURGERS AT THE CINEMA? EBEEISNDBEKSK i‘ll come to the US just to go and watch a movie lmaooo, i think all the popcorn sizes and drinks are bigger as well, i‘ll come and watch chaos walking with you 😌😌 does next week work?

and yeah i‘ve seen posts with specific time stamps and trigger warning for cherry too so if you haven’t looked on tumblr yet i’ve def seen some! (but ive also seen some on twitter and yeah- i mean idk youve probably looked on tumblr but yeah- then there’s also imdb which doesn’t have time stamps i believe but quite specific warnings, mostly without spoilers!)

Tbh i don‘t think i would have even considered watching cherry if tom wasn‘t in it... (i’m personally fine with most of the triggering topics/things like for some reason i’m just stoic when i’m watching the most tragic films ever dldldldlbut the plot just... idk if it‘s for me you know? just entertainment wise?).... and even with tom in it i‘m unsure skeldls, i‘d totally get if you decide not to watch it but let me know if you do i‘d want to hear your thoughts! <3

SKSLSJJ my sims both finally graduated!! i think i played sometime last week, and i literally got the achievement/notification that i‘d been playing with this household for 24hours.... and that was BEFORE they graduated dldjdldkdksjjs

oh no my tumblr broke and three paragraphs of me talking about sims were deleted 😭😭😭

WAIT NO I TOOK SCREENSHOTSSKSK because i couldn’t press save so i knew they might be gone okay okay okay i‘m a genius

*move out

oh no idk if the quality is too bad to read... idk how good your eyes are dkdkdjjd (also sometimes it will be really bad quality for some but not for others so i hope that the you can see the pics in a normal/good quality)

Okay let me continue

OMG THE ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL STUFF IS THE BEST PART ABOUT THE SIMS DIDLDKJIkdkj i kind of miss how in the sims 3 they would be making out basically lying on top of each other if they were on a bed— but in sims 4 when they‘re sitting next to each other and everything that‘s definitely hot too 😌😭 or with hot tubs dkdkdk how one sim climbs on the other sim‘s lap before they woohoo (i used to make them skinny dip in the hot tub and then make out and woohoo so they’re like naked on top of each other even if you can‘t see anything- en e waysss)

Dkdkdkdj so @ Rindfleischet.. blah bla. so it‘s basically just loads of individual words put together/connected and that‘s a really big part of german. so yesterday i had an online Einführungsveranstaltung for uni (like it was a zoom meeting where they just talked about general stuff about the uni and i was really anxious before, idk why, but it turned out absolutely fine so) and that words consists of the two words Einführung (introduction) and Veranstaltung (event) which are also two individual words but you can make a new word (Einführungsveranstaltung, so in english that‘s basically “introduction event“ lmao) by combining those two words. there are obviously some rules like you can‘t just combine random words in a random order but you can basically make infinite words (technically). for example (i feel like i‘m teaching a class just skip this if you don’t care 🙃🙃🙃djdjdkdlns)

for example i could say Einführungsveranstaltungsteilnehmer (which is not underlined with red by tumblr because it is a grammatically correct compound word (i think that‘s what they‘re called?)) which is the words introduction + event + participant, so that word just means “participant of an introductory event“ but instead it‘s one word? i hope that makes sense? dkdkkdksks i mean it makes sense in german but idk if it makes sense to you cause idk if i‘m explaining it very well lmao,

(I just deleted a really really long paragraph that i wrote about gender in the german language and grammar, you‘re welcome slsksksj)

my capacity to think has now been used up for the week 🥴🥴🥴 i absolutely do not blame you if you just skipped over that part or can‘t be bothered to (re)read my awful explanation edkflsksjdjdj (again, i had double the amount of words but i just deleted it dkdkdlslsl but what‘s left lf my german lesson is probably confusing enough already😭i‘m sorry🥴)

so to answer your question LEJDKSKJ: it‘s really common to have long words in german, words that are just word+ word+ word + word made into one long word. obv rindfleischetikettierung..... is a very extreme example and it‘s normally just 2-4 words made into one! So yup i think that comes mostly from german and talking german and growing up here and going to school here and everything dmdfnsksx

i think the best part about these is the chaos yet we understand what the other means 😌— YES. YES. Yes. I love that about us 😌😌🥰🥰/ I love us. Yes.

okay but your friend changing her mom‘s name into tom‘s mum‘s name (was that right? Dkdkdjh)—— so Justin Bieber once posted something where you could see that his Dad‘s number was saved as „Daddy Cakes“ (which, thinking back, sounds very weird ekejjej) and till this day I have my Dad’s contact name as Tata (which is serbian for Dad lmao), “Tata🍰“ in my phone because of it 😭😭😭😭🙃🙃🙃 it‘s not because of justin anymore like i‘ve just gotten used to it by now but at first i did it because of justin lol........ but nowadays i don‘t think i‘m THAT type of fan of anyone- like you know how people have fandom names (Justin‘s fans are the Beliebers, One Direction fans are Directioners (writing that hurt my soul💔💔💔)) and I wouldn‘t consider myself a fan of anyone like that. like even with tom i wouldn‘t call myself........ does tom even have a name for his fans??? Well if he does, I wouldn‘t call myself that. Like i used to be such a hardcore stan for any celebrity that i liked and now it‘s just... okay, i like em. (She says on her blog where she writes fan fiction about Tom Holland — WJDJEJDKELSKSKKSNSNDXB🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃)

Omg rex orange county!!!!!! I don‘t know that many songs like I‘ve only listened to the album pony, but i love it 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

thanks again for what you said about my fics/writing I‘m🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Pete Davidson Pete Davidson Pete Davidson I‘m-🥰🥰🥰🥰 and I can‘t explain why. But as blissfulparker said the other day (i don‘t want to tag her and make her read through all of this lolll) “I like my men when they look like they are on the brink of death 😍“ (or something along the lines of that) eskkejs okay pete isn‘t that bad, he looks quite good on some days but other days you‘re like... is this man alive? Like i don‘t want to be mean I love Pete so much The King of Staten Island is literally my favourite film ever (although it‘s not my #1 because of how he looks, but i mean he does look good) VUT ALSO

(Okay i was gonna look for a terrible picture of him but he really doesn‘t look as bad as people say??? like. i think he‘s hot. can‘t necessarily explain why. so that‘s that on that.)

i‘m not going chronologically right now (i just keep scrolling up to your ask and replying to whatever i see first sksksksh) so i might miss a thing or two that you said

Okay Stormzy, you really really don‘t have to dkdkdjd like i think you said you don‘t really listen to rap, and uk rap is a whole nother thing from us rap because of the accent i feel like??? (That sentence did not make sense) BUT if you‘re looking for a few songs that aren‘t like RAP rap, then I‘d recommend One Second (feat HER), Superheroes, Own it (which you might know?), ummm maybe the song Lessons?, he has a ton of Lion King references by the way dkdjdj for example in Rachael‘s Little Brother but that‘s like more RAP again if you know what I mean?😭 and it‘s also like 5 Minutes long and tbh i only started liking that song a year after that album came out lmao but Rachael‘s Little Brother is possibly my fav Stormzy song, then there is Shut Up which you absolutely need to listen to just for fun dldjdjd like it‘s just pure fun and also a little funny lmao, especially if you‘re not British (i imagine so at least) cause he‘s like shuTTTT up idk dldkdjdldkjdhdhfjfbfldlsksksks

Vossi Bop is one of his classics, and then maybeee - ok so there‘s Blinded By Your Grace Pt. 2 lmaoobdjsj it‘s very (Christian/) religious but i like it a lot even though i‘m not really Christian (at least not practicing or anything) so idk about your views on religion but i do like the song a lot just by like the sound lmao

Okay so again you absolutely DO NOT have to listen to any, especially not for me dlskdj but I really do recommend the songs Superheroes, One Second and Rachael‘s Little Brother (and all the other ones i mentioned but if you don‘t listen to a lot of his songs you should at least give these three a try <3333) also let me know some of your songs? 🥺 like i dont care who they‘re by but i‘d love to listen to some that you like and Recommend 🥰🥰🥰

Okay so skdjdjdjddhhddhdhjsk... I used to watch all of my series in German (like H2O) bc obviously they were on german tv so they were german- and i knew that most of these actors i saw on tv were american and i was always SO fascinated that they all learned german for this show??? Like I actually thought they were the people‘s real voices and that these English and American actors were learning german so they could re-record the whole ass show and do everything in german dkdkdldjdjjd... i swear I thought that until I was like 14 omg. And then the first time that I watched H2O in the original version i was sooo confused about their accents because to me all actors who spoke english were American?? I mean MOST of those shows are American so I wasn‘t completely off but yeah i was definitely caught off guard when I heard all of their Australian accents for the first time 💀💀😭😭😭

@ math vs maths, math actually makes more sense in my opinion. like you have the word mathematics, then the abbreviation would obviously be math... why would English people randomly add the s from the end??? Or maybe it makes more sense after all because it‘s like plural??? Now I‘m unsure dkdkdkdj but i do say maths because that‘s how i was taught to say it and i hear the word maths more than math but yeah dldkdjs i think math might even make more sense (okay i just tried saying math and maths is easier to pronounce but again tjat might just be me, oh god i‘ll stop talking about that disgusting thing (mathematics).)

not the crickets and dora LMAOOOSNSNSMDNBS yeah that teacher was... a lot. a lot a lot a lot didjjd but she kinda liked me so she always gave me good grades/marks but the people she didn‘t like..... ooft. OOF.

Fksksjsj idek about headache season like i just know that i get headaches from the sun and i‘m allergic to only one.. type of...pollen??? (I don’t understand the science of that whole pollen thing and idek if it’s called pollen in english i just know sex pollen from fan fics😔)and yeah we have this weird wind that makes a lot of people get headaches yeahd dkdkdj. i loved the i just love wearing as little clothes as possible LMAO lllioool i love that i really do. i always struggle so much in the summer cause i never have anything to wear. i feel like i buy so many new summer clothes every year but when i end up looking for an outfit i don‘t ever find anything 😭 (so i just go naked— lmao jk jk) but i‘m generally not the biggest fan of summer so-

OMG THIS FUCKING BIRD ISTG, okay the first time i heard it i went to sleep at like 5 am, so the next day i was like let me go to bed earlier so the bird doesn‘t keep me up, so i went to bed at 4 am (🥲) and THE BIRD JUST STARTED FUCKING CHIRPING SO LOUDLY, so the next day i went to bed at 3 am AND IT FUCKING STARTED AT 3 AM and it‘s still there 😁 every. night.

and since you said you‘ve gotten used to my theme and everything (idk where this transition came from😭) so tomorrow (2nd april) we have our... wait what‘s an anniversary but for a month.? I think month is like mensus in latin OK NO THATS DEF WRONG DKDKDJ wait

So Tomorrow is our... mensiversary💘💘💘💘💘💘 or at least from the first time you sent an ask. i couldn‘t find it on my tumblr anymore because tumblr is a bit of a bitch but i remember the first thing you ever sent (in an ask) was something lovely about my writing and i always take screenshots of stuff like that, and i found it in my gallery. and i took that screenshot of your ask on the 2nd of march so i‘m assuming that‘s when you sent it 🥰🥰 i feel like i‘ve known you for a week not a month like how is it a month already????? (i mean this in a good way lmao but i really can’t believe that its been a month wtf)

omg no you make me want to cry because i just love you so much 😭😭🥺 but about the stretch mark thing it‘s just.. it‘s not even me trying to empower other women (or anyone else who has stretch marks) to shake off these dumb insecurities that the patriarchy and capitalism have instilled in us— ok no it‘s definitely that too lmao. But i mean I‘ve always loved stretch marks, i‘ve just always loved loved loved them so much so it makes me genuinely sad that people don‘t like them. so yeah. i dont really know how to explain it lol, like i‘m not (only) hoping that people realise that hating your stretch marks is giving the men and the patriarchy what they want per se- (that made no sense) it‘s just because i love stretch marks and think they‘re beautiful and also sexy. idk dldkdjls and omg the fact that you called me kind 🥺🥺🥺 like i don‘t really have a goal in life or anything, but if i had to choose a ‘goal‘ in life it would just be to be kind. (i‘ll end this here otherwise i‘m gonna talk about being kind for 30 more lines—)

And please. Do not ever feel like you‘re annoying me or sending too much. never ever ever. I get so happy when i see that you‘ve sent me an ask. No matter if it‘s a long one like this or just a short one where you‘re saying something about a post that i reblogged or something. I love hearing from/about you and talking to you 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

P.S: i‘m so sorry for the tags you‘re about to read they make even less sense than this post, also i reached the tag limit dkdkdj but i said some butterfly tattoos look tacky... and the next thing i said was since we‘re already speaking about Ariana- I DID NOT MEAN THAT SHE WAS TACKY dldkdjsj, i meant since you already mentioned some of her tattoos lmao

#lovely anon #<3 #ALSO I LOVE YOUR TAGS SM DKDJDKDL #i definitely (accidentally) didn‘t say something about every single thing you said #but this is so long already and i don‘t want to force you to read even more of my shite dldkdjsj #(i dont day shite i say shit but sometimes shite sound funnier)#*say #omg its too mate to speak english what i meant was i‘m sire i forgot to adress some of the things you said but i tried my best iwjwskb #omg adress (address? lmao) sounds so negative i mean i‘m sure i forgot to reply to some things- also *late not mate loool #omg ignore my whole german lesson i cant believe i actually wrote all of that wtf #but it took me like 20 minutes so i don‘t want to delete it 😭#and omg i hope you got to re do everything that your sims game didnt save and that it all worked out the same #😭#I NEARLY DELETED THIS ASK WITJ MY ANSWER OH MYFUCKING GOD MY FUCKING HEART #also i realised i didnt say anything at all about uni but i dont have any news like that Einführungsveranstaltung (😭) I went to was literall #just about schedules and credits and boring stuff mostly lmao #oh and tattoos!!!! it sucks that you might not be able to get the ones that you want/get any :((((( but hopefully you can at least get some #that arent in colour? 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼#so my parents aren‘t that supportive either like they most definitely wouldnt pay for it (even though they pay for a lot of my stuff lmao)#but i think in the end they know that i‘m old enough and they can‘t stop me and they‘d accept it one day so they‘re definitely not THAT bad #maybe your parents will change their mind over time? :(#or maybe youll just get one one day and ig theyll have to get used to it lol #so i want a butterfly (thats the only thing that i‘m sure about) and there are a lot of butterfly tattoos that look really tacky #but speaking of her i actually really like ariana‘s butterfly! but idk if i want that much shading- i have a whole album with like 35 photos #of just butterfly tattoos lol- i‘ll stop here tho. ldkdkd #omg im rereading this all and it‘s so messy good luck dkdkkddl #my tags got messed up and idk how to fix it #wait did i reach the tag limit and you cant even see half of these? 😭😭😭#i‘m so confused about these tags why are they not in the correct order? 😭😭😭 ily snd i‘m so sorry for dropping this post on you none of it #none of it makes sense.

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ncvcmbcrflush · 4 years ago

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It is 1am and i just finished s2, so this is gonna be long and rambling and misspelled and im sorry okay?

I am not thrilled with the writing of klaus this season, can I just say? They completely undid all of his substantial development in s1, while also removing a good chunk of his positive qualities.

There were scenes where s1!klaus shined through (any of the scenes with Allison and vanya, mainly, and i was really worried abt the scenes with bby!Dave but they were handled really well imo) but those scenes were vastly overshadowed by the unnecessary cruelty? Why did they make my boy so mean this season, I am asking this question for real. S1!klaus was wild and a disaster and heartbreaking, but he was also so kind, and willing to grow as a person in ways that his siblings actively avoided most of the time.

How do you go from beautifully empathetic s1!klaus crying in response to his abusive father's suicide, protesting luther locking up vanya and later being so adamant that they take vanya back in time with them that he literally clings to her feet, to s2!klaus who seems to not care much about anything or anyone at all?? The man is dead in heaven with his father telling him point blank what a let down he is, and he still has enough love in him to cry for him, but 3 years pass and suddenly he doesn't shed a tear for his brother who just died saving their sister?? They took away so much of his emotionality and I do not understand why.

S1!klaus also absolutely would have been open to trying possession with Ben imo, and we could have avoided the intensely uncomfortable possession sequence, which should not have been played off as a joke because it wasn't funny at all, and instead just highlights how little autonomy klaus actually has- but that is a rant that needs way more brain power and research lmao.

S1!klaus also would never have hid ben from his siblings, after spending literal years telling them that ben was there with them??? He would not have done that.

And the scene where they try to save vanya was intensely ooc in my opinion- even high off his ass klaus is quick to react and jump into action- helpful or otherwise (throwing the fire extinguisher, improvising at the prosthetics lab for 5, trying to save luther in the club, running into the theater when they hear gunshots despite having no idea how to use his powers offensively, even in s2 when he finds allison at the protest) and I refuse to believe he would need to be pushed into trying to save vanya, who he has put his life at risk to save before.

The cult thing will be getting a post of its own because I have so many feelings about that whole deal but I again, am too incoherent currently.

I loved him and allison so so much, and he and vanya just break my heart together bc they are such opposite sides of the same coin and the show doesn't seem interested in exploring that whatsoever? I was a bit bummed to not really see him interact with the boys at all though. He and Diego seemed pretty close in s1, 5 and klaus have some good scenes together, and he and luther had some good interactions at the end of s1 as well, and i wish they had kept going with that.

It just feels like they were so busy with the others, and klaus got lost along the way. We do nothing with his powers except for the possession thing, like literally besides ben and the two ghosts at the very end of the last episode klaus doesn't use his powers at all during the entire season! I loved watching everyone else kind of come into their own, but that just never happened for klaus this season- if anything, he devolved.

And I think as a side effect of fucking up klaus, they fucked up his relationship with ben, and the other boys to a lesser extent, as well.

S1 ben and klaus is what i would expect from a pair of siblings stuck together for 17 years- nagging and sarcastic and judgemental but also loving and close and they work well together. They are both dumbasses who do things like play patty cake to test ben's tangibility, and decide that tossing a bowling ball is a good way to prove that ben is present.

S2 ben and klaus are entirely antagonistic; more in line with luther and diego in s1. I have seen lots of comments saying that anyone upset with ben and klaus's dynamic in s2 doesn't have siblings, and to that i have to say- people who think their dynamic in s2 is normal don't have abusive parents. There are lines that you absolutely do not cross, and comparing a sibling to your abuser is one of them. And you don't need to have siblings to know that dismissing the death of a loved one like, isn't a good thing to do? This is especially jarring given their relationship in 2019 and as children- there is no set up for this kind of behavior from either of them.

And the others were just so overall dismissive of klaus in a way that goes beyond just sibling annoyance. During the family dinner no one bats an eye when ben jumps into him, causes his body to jerk around, and literally says that he's ben?? He lies on the floor of the elevator looking like death and we don't so much as ask what's wrong? Klaus pukes out the contents of 7 fully grown humans practically and no one offers a tums, or a ride to the damn hospital?? Like wasn't diego a fuckin cop, he should know that none of this is the result of an overdose??? As far as i can recall,, klaus doesn't even use drugs in this season? We see him drink but that's it unless I'm forgetting, which is entirely possible since it is now 2am lmao. And they just play it off as jokes, we are meant to find this funny?

And just like, he wasn't involved in the actual plot of this season much, if at all, besides being a largely unwilling catalyst for ben. Nothing would change in this season if they had cut him out completely, and i really hate that.

I'm not upset at all really- despite sounding upset and writing a long ass rant lmao- the let down of one character doesn't ruin the season for me, and honestly, given how other shows have failed me this year (looking at you, the politician) , i count this season as a win overall. Luther especially has changed so much for the better, and he was probably the highlight of this season. I'm just bummed because klaus was s u c h a good character in season one, easily one of the most interesting characters, and they did nothing with him this season.

#tua season 2 #tua season two #tua #the umbrella academy #tua spoilers #tua rant #i had feelings im sorry #coherant breakdown coming soon lmao #tua salt #it's not really salt but also it is? idk #klaus hargreeves

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textalotter · 5 years ago

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What are your thoughts on Scorpio Mars and Virgo Venus?

Hyper-critical of potential partners, the native enters a partnership that revolves around servitude and practicality, superbly sexual and pursues intimacy via sex with partners, has the potential to switch multiple sexual partners often, but the Virgo Venus calms this down.

What does a Scorpio Mars imply when a guy is trying to show interest and how does that come into play?

They’re the subtle hinters, they’ll make a lot of kind of romantic/sexual suggestions but if you ask they’ll deny. They won’t say anything they’re not ready to say and has a very intense energy to them.

What would Virgo Venus sextile Scorpio Mars entail?

A person that knows what they want from their partner, feels safe in their skin and with what they want, closed off and loyal to the people they love, could move others to come back to their own values and to be healthily selective, when truly emotional investigated gives their all and goes out of their way for their partner.

Can you tell me the compability between Aries Mars (f) and Scorpio Mars (m)?

So this is most likely chaos. I say this with love and in all seriousness... be very careful. Both of these signs are guided by mars meaning they are at home here or very set in their ways. These two lovers fall for each other very differently and need to have good communication to make this work! Aries is quick to jump into this whole relationship while Scorpio will move slower, yet the roles will reverse as this relationship becomes more intense. Scorpio will never fully open themselves up under mars but if other placements align they may. Scorpio also loves intensely when they do finally commit and this can be frightening for Aries when it comes to committing. Aries is quick to run from a relationship if Scorpio’s feelings become too intense. Aries must evaluate carefully if this relationship is something that they see for the long haul before making a choice. Because this is so intense and both signs are fighters in such different ways, they can deeply scar each other through acts of revenge and scorn. Aries can have a temper that is sudden and explosive while Scorpio will seek to emotionally hurt their partner. Likewise Scorpio will take time to warm up to Aries. They may move much slower than Aries is used to. But if Aries is patient and decides to be invested, they may find that the Scorpio man may provide nurturing and love they desire deeply while still being independent. Although Scorpio can be manipulative of Aries feelings here while letting them be independent in some ways. They tend to want to be in control of their relationships and how they are viewed and Aries is susceptible to ideas Scorpio can warp and transpires. If Aries lets this happen they may feel trapped by their partner. Scorpio may also tire of Aries impulsiveness and passive attitude. When Scorpio begins to feel trapped or hurt they will lash out negatively.

Sexually this pairing is perfect for each other! As both reside in mars they are equally “freaky” for each other and find similar aspirations sexually. This may be the initial connection between the pair because both respond well to good sex and find a connection in it. This is also a form of communication between the two. Sex speaks for how they truly feel for each other and says more than words here.

This connection is powerful but can fall apart quick. You must be careful with each other’s feelings and really think individually before making rash decisions that could hurt each other or yourselves. Be very conscious of each other and never selfish or the relationship will spiral. Compatibility is 2/10 - Under mars the initial spark is very strong but outside of sex, they will clash over what they want vs what they need within a relationship.

What’s your opinion on Virgo Venus + Scorpio Mars in a relationship?

Virgo Venus men are constantly seeking perfection in a mate so at times it may be hard for them to choose/they can be picky. They prefer the quintessential ‘good girl’ type or at least someone who displays modesty, an organized/professional demeanor. Scorpio mars means extreme intensity. So on top of all the kissing, he may even enjoy a bit of BDSM/being tied up/choking etc. Scorpios like that stuff. Men with Scorpio mars’ will be the type to also hold your hand while doing these kinds of things to you. Very very very strong libido [ruled by Mars]. Their energy is also extremely attractive– very easy for them to seduce others even without trying so be careful with romantic rivals. There will be romantic rivals.

Positive and negative qualities of Mars in Scorpio?

✎ POSITIVES:

amazingly competitive

exploding with passion

very patient, slow to anger

very strong-willed, strong-minded

they’re one of the best signs in bed

hardworking and bc they know how to use their power well, they have a lot of potential to do very well in their careers (ceo status truly)

✎ NEGATIVES:

p e t t y

stubborn

jealous, overbearing, possessive

holds grudges way too long.. way too long

remembers other’s weaknesses just to use them against them in arguments and disputes

passive aggressive asf

I don't quite understand how Mars in Scorpio acts when they are pissed by something, how do they act in situations? I always read that in comparison whtn Aries they don't put theyr anger out on someone immediately, but they still are capable of intense anger and emotions?

Of course Aries and Scorpio are quite different, even though Scorpio was co-ruled by Mars, Scorpio is the different side of the coin. Aries is a more naive energy in a sense of more reckless and impulsive, just out there, while Scoprios are more contained, strategic, never reckless. Scorpios are assertive, dominant in very clever, cunning ways if you may say, they are obviously scary and intense when mad, very intense energy, just their vibe, their energy makes you feel a certain way, while with Aries hell breaks loose. Their energies and the way they go about things with a Mars placement is very different, also depending on the house Mars is in as well, that plays a big part. Scorpio Mars are also very tough and extreme and quite blunt.

Mars: Scorpio

- Emotions are highly concentrated

- Vengeful if upset; worst enemy you can make

- High energy placement

- Secretive

- Horny 24/7

- Self-disciplined and self sufficient

- Nothing can stop them once goals are set

- Highly obsessive

- Apt to be jealous and possessive

- Powerful emotions make for a powerful will

- Don’t fear much of anything unless it involves losing what belongs to them

This is my opinion but I think Scorpio Mars anger is some of the scariest out there. It depends on your definition of scary or intimidating really but having been in close proximity to Scorpio Mars people...it's certainly something to witness.

They can be the sweetest most considerate person but when they get angry (properly angry not irritated) they can rage. I've had a Scorpio Mars confide in me during those times and go over these elaborate, terrifying ideas for getting revenge on someone that actually shocked me, because I would never expect it from them. I had to laugh (we both did), because it was a little ridiculous and also because I knew they would never actually do those things.

But seeing just how quickly they went for the long con and how they knew exactly where to hit people where they were vulnerable was extremely telling.

Scorpio Mars men I've actually seen have raging fits of anger that are destructive, but they were also very fiery, so that's probably why.

Anger aside, they're determined people. Even when Mars in the chart is retrograde sometimes they put so much passion into what matters to them, and are usually hypersexual. If not that then they do still seek out and crave intimacy with others. Casual sex is okay when they're in a certain mindset but really they're better suited with partners they can trust. They reveal a lot of their inner desires/feelings when it comes to sex that they otherwise tend to keep private and really they would like to be able to share these parts of themselves with the right person.

I do love Scorpio Mars energy but I understand that it's not for everyone in reality. They can be very obsessive/possessive of their partners, but not in any genuinely dangerous way (most of the time). The more demanding types who are obsessed with feeling empowered are usually the ones to watch out for.

When they have other things in their chart to balance themselves out I think is when this placement works best, but even then they'll have some lessons to learn when it comes to sex and applying their energy in useful ways rather than dissipating it.

The Venus Signs when they like someone

Gemini Venus: They’ll talk a lot about the things they like and want to know what their crush like and do. They can ask a lot of questions and be very open to answering any question that their crush may have for them

Virgo Venus: They’re very careful people, the kind you’re probably not sure if they like you even when they say it..until they show that they’ve listened to what you’ve had to say and what you like

🐏 ARIES MARS

Mars is at its strongest in Aries, its natural sign. This placement represents high energy, initiative, courage and impulsiveness. Most of the energies seem to come out as the physical and emotional type, but in Aries, Mars is very active and assertive in demonstrating enthusiasm for all four types of energy. This is a very powerful position for Mars.

You have an unrestricted drive to get projects done, to start new projects, and to act decisively. Your enthusiasm is contagious. An individualist with quite an ego, you always want to do things your way. Based on the influence of this planet taken by itself, you are not good at compromise or teamwork. There is a major part of you that always wants to charge out ahead of the pack and be the leader. Despite your apparent leadership abilities, you may function best when you are working alone and independently because of your demand to have your own way. If you are in a group, you will aspire to be the leader. Headstrong and independent, you won't tolerate opposition or interference and your temper can get you into trouble at times. Mars in Aries makes you very competitive in a variety of ways. This is perhaps the most courageous and enterprising Mars position.

You have a very strong sex drive which is spontaneous and easily aroused. Self-control can be a problems in this regard. As on the physical side, you are often unrestrained and very demanding emotionally.

The negative side of Mars in Aries is a lack of patience and discipline. Self-control and humility can be hard lessons, and often they are never mastered.

Like a warrior ready for battle. Aries Mars is a placement with an abundance of energy. Sometimes when these people can’t use the energy productively, it can channel into anger, frustration, and impatience. Aries Mars needs something physical to release their energy. Aries Mars is fierce and knows what they want and how to get it. They’re always looking for the next thrill/adventure. A great person to travel with.

🦂 SCORPIO MARS

In Scorpio, Mars displays powerful emotions and desires. Mental, physical, and practical energies are are, likewise, also very high. Indeed, the level of energy with this placement is high in all respects.

You are strong, self-reliant, extremely efficient, and highly self-disciplined. An intensity of purpose surrounds all that you undertake. This position illustrates the "do or die" principle very well. You may have an innate ability to transform other people in some significant way. You think of yourself as a "take control" person and a force to be reckoned with. You probably are.

Intensely passionate and sensual, you put much of your energy into sex. You are apt to be especially attractive to the opposite sex, whether or not you physically attractive. You may be fascinated with sexuality in all its expressions, certainly your interest is always keen. You're jealous and possessive of your sexual partners. Being trustworthy yourself, you expect the same from others. You're a loyal friend, or a bitter enemy, you never forget a betrayal.

Slow to anger, you rarely loose control, but when your ire is raised, you get even, and you can do so with frightening detachment. Proud, dignified, strong-willed, and stubborn, you have the sort of presence that is always felt by others even when you say nothing.

I love this placement :’) everyone thinks scorpio mars is big and scary, which can be true if you cross them, but they are so loyal if you just listen to them and be compassionate. They are actually pretty gentle like a cancer mars, but they have a front because they can’t take anymore hurt. If developed, this mars placement is incredibly psyhic an intuitive. Great partners in bed.

The differences between Mars in Aries and Mars In Scorpio

Scorpio is more observant and aware and will exploit your weaknesses. They're more controlled. Aries, literally doesn't give an eff and will attack you and try to dominate you if you make them mad. Scorpio does slow burns but can exploit aries's impulsiveness and manipulate them into messing up. Scorpio might feel attacked by Aries's directness. Aries might feel small when scorpio shows them their mistakes.

The signs and crushes 💕

Gemini: charms crush into falling for them , Gemini’s are great at talking and are total masters at the mind so it’s like they study their crush, will stare at them like a work of art , asks them aLOT of questions, makes them laugh

Virgo: observation galore, notices little things about the crush, to how they like to wear their hair to their favorite color, very sweet , loves to help and listen to them if they are feeling upset , buys them little thoughtful gifts if they really feeling them. Gets close with them

Can you do a post on how each Mars sign would try and seduce someone they like?

Aries Mars - oh they’re either direct in a sense of directly asking you out, or just wanting to get close to you so they initiate hang outs, they really light up when speaking to that s/o, just their body language and energy is totally noticeable when they like someone, you can sniff it a mile away, they will either defend that person or have debates and arguments on purpose, so they will mentally stimulate their person and awaken that passion when communicating, also other provocations as well lol, we are provoking little shits i must admit but we do it directly lol, also lots of touching and teasing, competitive

Scorpio Mars - ahhhhhhh intensity, there is some kind of magnetism there that attracts you, some kind of a puzzle and mystery that pulls you in about them, once they like you they will want to get to know you fully, they will want to achieve intimacy in your soul to soul connection, they are tough and there is a sense of danger attracting you but once they start liking you they will become obsessed with you and you will notice that they become obsessive and possessive and a bit jealous, because they feel emotions so intensely and deeply they feel these negative emotions like that as well and it shows.

Mars in Scorpio - Sex

In sexual matters they may not be totally open, but when they do let go sexually they can be physically and emotionally insatiable and do nothing by halves. The sexual act often involves totally merging with a partner and possessing the uncanny ability of understanding a lover’s deepest and darkest desires. As a sign of extremes, he or she can either live totally without sex or are very passionate in the bedroom. Mars in Scorpio is sexually magnetic, and when they feel passionately about someone or something they become obsessed. They want to explore the depths of a partner, but power struggles may be an issue in close relationships, and if betrayed they may become violent and their emotions explode to the surface with great ferocity.

Sexual, Powerful, Scary

People born with Mars in Scorpio are never afraid to go to dark and scary places. They thrive there, its where they derive their energy. It is best not to mess with people, they operate with great power in the realm of your deepest fears and oldest nightmares. If you anger them, they will strike where it really really really hurts. They have quite a lot of soul power and often spend their lives training it and trying to control it so that it can be used for good and not evil. This type usually has a lot of energy tied up in sexual matters. They will need to find some athletic or creative practice in which to funnel their strong core energy so that they don’t become total sex addicts. Their sex drive is extremely high and their raw sexual energy is usually off the charts. They are often extremely sexy and attractive people. Whatever they look like, they usually don’t have to try hard at all to find a sex partner. They tend to draw partners to them without much effort.

Men born win Mars in Scorpio will be the strong silent type, the dark horse. They are mysterious and intimidating. They are very private, confident, and sexy. They are very secretive. There is always something bubbling under the surface that you will NEVER know about. They may seem very shy and quiet. They are usually loners. They don’t do well in packs. They are very in touch with their dark side and use it to get what they want. They possess a lot of power and as a result they don’t attract a lot of competition. They are very intimidating and people are usually too scared to go near them. Less sharp people may see their quietness as weakness and may poke the tiger. They often attract less intuitive bully types who only see them for who they are on the surface. They sense some power but they don’t believe it so they test them and test them until they finally experience their extreme sting. They always regret it.

Mars in Scorpio is the most aggressive Scorpio position possible. If you think it hurts when a Sun in Scorpio comes back for their revenge, you will not at all be prepared for what a Mars in Scorpio man has to bring. They are out for blood and blood only. They can play really dirty too. Nothing is off bounds or off limits. It can get very ugly with these people. They are not the types to pick fights or enter competitions. But when they are in a fight or competition. They cannot stand to lose and they don’t really care how they win, as long as they do.

Mars in Scorpio men are not typically very athletic though they should be. They do great in any type of physical routine that involves focus and deep concentration. They can excel in martial arts, water sports, extreme sports, yoga, gymnastics. Their biggest competition is themselves and they do best when they can constantly push themselves beyond their own limits. They can be daredevils too so they should exercise caution in any sport and don’t push themselves too far. Mars in Scorpio is at their best when they can find a routine physical practice they can really excel in. They are so powerful and emotionally balanced when that happens.

Mars in Scorpio can be very into activities that are weird, psychedelic, occult, magical etc. They often exert a lot of energy experimenting in areas of the unknown and shooting themselves, in some form, into oblivion. They often experiment with drugs. They have to exercise extreme caution with these substances because they can easily get lost in that world. Scorpio is the sign of the underworld and its very easy for them to tell themselves they belong only there. They can also be a bit masochistic They can easily push themselves too far in a dark direction out of a dysfunctional need to punish themselves for something.

Scorpio is also the sign of transformation though. So more than anyone Mars in Scorpio man will have the ability to control or quit any addictions as long as he really wants to. Most importantly he can use his experiences in the other side to add to his own power and put the energy towards something positive. When this happens they are usually highly creative people. Their creations are so beautiful, they seem magical and they are always fun to experience.

Mars in Scorpio man is very loyal in relationships. He can be obsessively loyal even possessive. He is usually the type to stay committed to one person at a time. They have very focused energy and they can’t often successfully convince more than one person of true devotion. They are very sensitive, much more sensitive than they seem and they often get hurt by their lovers. When this happens it will take them a while but they will cut that person off forever. But they will probably fester and fester about it for a very long while. They may stalk that person and be secretly obsessed for a long while. This negative energy, though, often fuels them in some way, creatively or athletically. They always take their sexual turmoil and use it to boost their own power in some way. Sexual frustration often yields huge creative or financial success in their lives.

Sexually, their skills are usually off the charts. At their best, they are the masters. Instinctively they just know what they are doing. If they have nothing to block this powerful energy then they connect very well with their partner and understand her needs. They are sensitive, careful, and passionate. They love sex. They live for sex. And the opportunity to do it with someone they really love is basically the highest part of heaven and the deepest part of hell for them rolled up into one. It is a very powerful experience.

Mars in Scorpio equates sex with power. They are faithful to their partner. They can be very complex, and they need their partner to want to share the depth and intensity of the experience. They don't kiss and tell; they believe sex to be an intimate and personal issue. They give great emotional depth to their partners. They may focus on breaking sexual taboos, if their partner is up to it. Mars in Scorpio is a bit possessive of their partners. While they probably won't admit it, they don't like to share their partners with anyone, not even for social engagements or family obligations.

Mars signs and sex ♂

Aries: Quick to get aroused, little foreplay. Rough and aggressive sex. Hair pulling. Selfish in bed. Probably really like doggystyle, and having sex against a desk or a table. They don’t last long but they’re always up for a second round. Unexpected sex, be ready to do it anywhere.

Scorpio: Either really dominant or submissive, they like power plays. Lots of stamina, powerful rhythm. Probably likes things like ropes and handcuffs, they like to break taboos. Pain turns them on, probably likes biting and scratching. Hickeys to show possession.

What do you think about a Mars in Scorpio guy?

The classic Mars in Scorpio male, is dashing, and in charge, with a pinch of old-school charm. They are independent, strong willed, and gifted at getting things done. Nothing excites a mars in Scorpio like a challenge,. They carry themselves with a sultry alluring mysterious air, practically begging to be explored. When Mars is in Scorpio, the sexuality is unnaturally prominent, they will be a veritable sex magnet. It’s said the sexual magnetism is so irresistible, physical appearances are totally disregarded in the presence of this planet. Luckily, the cool tempering of Scorpio makes them go about loving differently. Rather than having sex, this planet in Scorpio is for making love. The intimate experiences will be intense passionate, yet strangely dark. One must be truly special to be with a mars in Scorpio male.

A Mars in Scorpio is sexy without trying, without knowing, without even being physically attractive. They just ooze sexual energy, naturally, all the time; it's something they don't have to think about, like breathing.Mars in Scorpio is a darkly sexual lover. Sex is something that is intense and deep for them, even if they will never admit it. Mars in Scorpio might be into the idea of power and will like to be in control of their partner. Mars in Scorpio will have a high sex drive and a need for intimacy. Taboos and strange sex appeal to this Mars. Mars in Scorpio can have sexual fantasies that might make some feel appalled. Mars in Scorpio is not for everyone, though. Not everyone can handle their intense passion in the bedroom. Sex is one of their favorite passtimes. Mars in Scorpio will make sure that their lover is pleased because they want to be the best at sex.

Mars in Scorpio

Your mars sign is about how you act in a situation. It’s your sex life and what you find attractive in men (if you are attracted to men)

A person with their Mars in Scorpio will take action with endless willpower and passion. Either they will get the task done, exaclty on time with a bow on it, or they simply won't commit to it at all. In a situation they seem calm, cool and collected, but push them to far and you will witness the intense emotion that lies underneath. A Scorpio in Mars likes to be ambitous and set challenging goals for themselves. They have lots of energy and as said before, although the are slow to show emotion, once they do you would do best to stay out of their way.

A person with this placement who is attracted to men will be likely to go for men with a mysterious aura. They like distinct facial features, and proportionate body compositions.

A person with Mars in Scorpio is always attractive no matter what exactly their physical appearence is. They have a certain magnetism about them that attracts potential lovers. In the bedroom, these people are up for almost anything. They think of sex as powerful, passionate, and erotic. Many like to get into the more taboo side of the bedroom. But at the same time, they are not sluts. They stick with one partner at a time for the most part, and what happens in the bedroom- or anywhere else- stays in the bedroom. And despite their often eagerness to get in touch with some of the kinkier stuff, they always respect their partners wants and needs first.

You will often be a jealous lover though you can hide it very well. Your sex life must have a deep emotional bond or it will feel rather meaningless. You can be attracted to intense lovers. You can be very stubborn about your beliefs and your ideas and thoughts will be hard to change. You will have the strength and will power to go after what you want. A very passionate person.

You rarely get mad. You're often annoyed, irritated, but you rarely get mad. When you're mad you fight people. You are prepared for any type of violence, and you sure as hell know how to fight even if you've never done it before. You're easily annoyed by family/dumb people. Dumb people piss you off as much as the next guy, it's just that when you're annoyed you go into a different realm. You're quite, which is probably why some people fear you, because they probably think you're plotting revenge which in actuality you're just annoyed. The only time you get actually angry, is when people talk shit. You believe that if you don't like someone, or if you have something to say, that you shouldn't scurt around the issue, that you should fuckin say somethin. I mean, you get pissed when people talk about you, but if people repeatedly talk mad shit about your friends??? haha I hope they have life insurance lmfao. You are a deeply and secretly passionate person. When you love things you LOVE things. When it comes to sex you are indifferent. It's not something you talk about a lot, it's not something you really care for but when your time comes to get it on you are A+ in bed. You are very sexual, kinky and all around there to please your partner and you have fun doing so. You're usually the dominant one but you're welcome to all kinds of things. People with Mars in Scorpio make extremely formidable enemies. It takes a great deal of hurt to anger them, and they are the slowest to anger. They very rarely get to their real anger, they may have many irritations and annoyances that other people may cause to them, but even then they will keep an even keel and not show any reaction and will keep it under the surface, like all of their bubbling emotions. For them to get truly angry it may take months, even years of emotional hurt, their anger can be represented as boiling water, the energy of Mars being the anger that gives the warmth, and the energy of Scorpio which represents the emotional water, it boils and boils, getting warmer and warmer until it becomes too much and that’s when they embrace their Scorpio nature and go after whatever the hurt is coming from, most likely a person. They are highly vengeful people and nothing will stop them from bringing karma to those who deserve it, they will fester for awhile, thinking about how to strike and when it happens, it’s truly a horrific yet incredible experience. Someone with Mars in Scorpio will make the source of their hurt make each day a living hell while being inconspicuous and even friendly to that person, you will truly never know if a Scorpio Mars is after you, because they hide things so well and they use that as their weapon. They will never stop until they get what they want and what they want when angered, is blood.

Venus Signs in love

Venus in Gemini:

how they attract others: venus in gemini people love to flirt. they use their quick wit as a tool to attract someone. they love teasing and making the person they’re pursuing interested in finding out more about them. they act playful and show interest and knowledge in many different subjects. a venus in gemini’s goal is to have the other person think of him or her as “cute” and “fun”.

what they want in a relationship: a gemini venus wants frequent change and spontaneity. they want someone who can hold great conversations on a variety of topics. they want someone who will show tons of interest in them. humor is very important to a gemini venus. every gemini venus’ goal is to always have something to smile about in the relationship. they want to be entertained by their partner and also feel like they’re “free”.

how they act in a relationship: venus in gemini people don’t care much about deep issues in the relationship. they don’t want to discuss them. they are always fun and full of life. gemini venus has lots of friends so won’t spend all of his/her time with their partner. they talk a lot and love sharing interests. they want to learn as much as possible and share what they learned with their partner. gemini venus closely analyzes the entire relationship. they keep the relationship stimulating for them. they make the relationship feel both comfortable and fun. venus in gemini wants to skip problems and emphasize the good aspects of the relationship.

how the relationship can end: gemini venus doesn’t want a partner that is always stuck on the same thing. a partner that hates change is a partner that won’t work for them. a gemini venus hates not receiving attention and feeling too “tied down”. if the relationship doesn’t have intelligent conversations, the relationship will not work. they don’t want a “boring” relationship. if their partner is always trying to address issues, the two aren’t compatible.

Venus in Virgo:

how they attract others: a virgo venus doesn’t flirt. instead, they will show that they are clean, organized, attentive, reliable and logical. the person the venus in virgo is interested in will notice those qualities. usually they are attracted to a friend. no virgo venus attempts to pursue a stranger, they don’t know the stranger very well. virgo venus will make sure to be helpful. they are shy and slow to enter a relationship because they want to be sure of the other person’s feelings.

what they want in a relationship: venus in virgo wants to be appreciated. they want one-on-one dates and preferably in a quite setting. they want to feel needed but not get taken advantage of. they want to fix any relationships issues that are present. they want to feel confident with the relationship, it’s important that they know their partner is loyal. because they are shy, they don’t want to be shown off too much. they would much rather have a quiet and dedicated relationship.

how they act in a relationship: virgo venus is extremely attentive. they love doing small things to make their partner happy. these things that they do are’t grand gestures of love, though. nothing flashy or showy, but very helpful. they are great listeners and will learn everything there is to know about their partner. sometimes they need space. every person with venus in virgo is pretty critical, but it’s just because they’re trying to help. their relationships are comfortable.

how the relationship can end: virgo venus is very helpful in such small ways that they might go unnoticed. their partner needs to be able to recognize this help and show appreciation for it. the relationship will end if virgo venus’ partner is not dedicated or doesn’t pay very much attention to the virgo venus. the partner can’t be too bold or active. virgo venus likes to feel safe, pushing them to do things that they don’t want to do can seriously damage the relationship.

🕊🥀 What turns you on? 🥀🕊

Mars in Aries: Women can be drawn to dominate and passionate men and like the idea of being conquered and tamed(seeing as how these women tend to be a force of nature) and usually they like the idea of “forced submission"The hair is a hotspot and hair pulling can be a common occurrence sexually here. Rough sex is a commonality and most people link mars in Scorpio to animalistic sex and I would say that’s more Aries mars natives. •kinks: domination and rough housing, these natives are sexually aroused by the nitty gritty of sexual liaisons. They're both energetic and easily childlike with their libido! They crave constant and immediate gratification and satisfaction and for that reason are known to climax quickly or overwhelm themselves with pleasure before the act has even started. They want sex to feel animalistic and raw-raw lust turns them on and so does the prospect of losing oneself to the "feeling" their muts in the sheets be it male or female and women and men here lean towards being tops. There not in to prolonged forplay and can get easily bored with overly wordy interlude to sex despite their easy attraction to the air signs. Persona mars in Aries(mars and Venus persona chart) •these are the impulsive and daring when in love, every move and every step is sought with passion and chaos. They may Natally have a calm mars sign like Virgo or even cancer yet when in love they're a different beast..one of high volistic energy. They tend to be a bit more sexually driven in the relationship and at times may seem to only have their minds in a bedroom setting 24/7 when in reality sex is how they show their love-it's a doorway in the most primitive sense of expressing their deep love for their partner. Sex here is very as they say "Latin" it takes on a powerful and romantic tone but one littered in intoxicating dominance..they can seem to want to devour their partners and can be turned on by the mere sight of their partner vulnerable and naked before them. Draconic mars in Aries: •a soul assertiveness-there is a hidden and underlining tension and friction to these individuals no matter their natal or even persona mars they have a almost unconscious desire for bare and raw to the flesh like physical interaction. These people are insatiable and often have a almost otherworldly vestibule of sexual grace-their past life was one lived with force and pravada one the was hard fought but one that was sought through ones own identification with her/his physical identity of the self. This personality often may never rear its head unless one truly grows to unify with this energy-but sex here always has an elements of emotional whirlwinds and vagrant friction..sex here is the most animalistic of them all and one that is as close to death as possible, these natives often crave fire sign energy in that of the natal charts of others and tend to showcase this side of themselves most when involved with Arian lovers(sun/moon/mercury/Venus/mars/rising/and generational planets included)

Aries mars are often the most primal and raw of the mars signs simply it being the first born. Aries mars identify sex with the physical body and feel the most comfortable in the realm of sex as they are in unison with mars-which adds to the almost domineering and tyrant nature they exhibit sexually. They tend to lean towards more aggressive and even fast strokes and or sways when in the moment. That being said Aries does things fast and can be the type to ejaculate a bit too soon, this can even be said for the women here. That being said sexually they’re not selfish and usually want their partner to be just as overwhelmed by the sensation as they are.

Debunk: Aries mars are usually very tender sexually and aren’t “go go go” the whole time! In fact they are fairly open to new things even if they express disinterest at first. Foreplay isn’t something they’re really into but it’s not impossible to get them to give it a try! A biggie debunk here is that not all Aries mars are gonna be super aggressive and wild!! Aha but they’ll all have a lot of energy!.

Decans:

Decan one(0-10 degrees): will be the more excitable and verbal of the bunch! Very high libido and an intense sexual hunger! Will most likely love tension and have a very natural and easy going nature about the way they express their sexuality! Might cum fast but will give you the ride of your life.

Mars in Scorpio: Men from what I’ve noticed are very much so turned on my the “moment” they LIVE for that one “moment” and the lead up to it. They can be very easily aroused by touch and perceived stimulation and or anticipation of a moment turning into something more. So if you intrigue them enough and give them the idea that something otherworldly(and or sexual) could occur via glances and movements and a small shake and jive here and there you’ve got them. Sex here is about control and how many ways you and them can lose said control.

✨✨ Aries Mars culture ✨✨

Aries is at home with Mars so that Arian energy is doubled and extremely passionate in bed.

amazing STAMINA, can probably go on for hours especially in their youth.

It’s a very rough, raw type of love/sex

Very adventurous in bed, would like to try new things

The hunter looking for it’s prey...and once they get you, OH BOYY

Extremely passionate about their love. If they love you, they will scream it from the rooftops. Sexual compatibility is important to them though!

✨✨ Scorpio Mars culture ✨✨

Pluto is the higher version of Mars, so when these two get together… woah

Sex is intense, but since Scorpio is a sign of black and white there are periods of total absence (which may come off as a surprise) and ones of full of intensity (not much of a surprise) (but doesn’t absence make things more kinkier?)

These people are highly magnetic and ooze a certain type of secret sexuality

Has high stamina and a strong will to get a lot (or very difficult) things done

Usually has a higher pain tolerance (mentally and physically), the type of people who has a “horror” story that involves them overcome something

Passive aggressive af (gifted at manipulation and revenge)

Not the one to kiss and tell, very secretive and takes things seriously

Into the taboo or unconsciously attracts it, relationships and events can border toxic or dangerous

Prime candidate to be a stalker or to be stalked

Very primal in bed, usually sees sex as a part of nature– a way of procreation before untimely death (like a prey mantis, kinky right)

Wants to be dominate or be dominated in sex, or at least into more risky, intimate sex

Sex Gods, usually needs to deeply understand their partner before sex so they usually know how to deeply satisfy them

Not into casual sex or sleep around, but if they are it doesn’t mean much “it’s just sex,” bc sex with a bond is different and more meaningful to them

Paranoid at others actions, they type of people who see through your lies and bullshit

Usually has to fight for their riches and resources, so jealously and protectiveness of lovers can be high and loyalty is a priority

Money, riches and other resources are hawt bc they mean power (which is even hawter)

Likes to be with someone who is strong and can play power games with them, or someone who can make them be a power couple

passion unmatched by any other placement

sex will be crazy crazyyyy

aggressive af

probably a psychopath in relationships, nbd tho

having intense emotions

Don't tell them they can't do something because they will make it their life’s mission to prove they can

attracts so many people but ends up pushing most of them away

Mars signs and erogenous zones/kinks

Mars in Aries:

Those people love rough sex and may like to include a little bit of pain in the sexual act.

They like to dominate and dislike submission.

Their sensitive spot is the whole head (if I can say that). They may enjoy hair pulling, ear bitting.

Hair Pulling is the best way to make an Aries Mars wanting to scream your name or call you different names.

As we were talking about names. They may love to be called “daddy/mommy” because it gives them the power they dream about.

They are the types to scratch their partner’s back and be actually very proud of their act.

Mars in Scorpio:

We got to the so known ‘king of sex’.

They are sensitive everywhere when having sex.

They love to dominate as much as Aries.

They sometimes love to get jealous, it might actually turn them on.

They love bondage and whips.

They can love everything from above, especially daddy and mommy kink.

They love foreplay as much as penetration.

Those people love blowjobs, maybe too much.

Having rough sex is not something to be afraid of, they say this themselves. Being a little animalic isn’t doing anything wrong, right?

Men might prefer a dominatrix or a person to dominate the game. They need to fight somehow.

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velvet-tread · 7 years ago

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I wanted to get your perspective because you ship it and most of us have bias against it. Do you think Bell loves Echo as much as Clarke? I think he’s in love with her but does he love her as much or will he possibly discover in s5 that he doesn’t love her as much???Not trying to cheapen becho’s loving relationship, just wanted your thoughts.

Nonny - you did not ask for part of the below to bean essay on Why Becho Are In Love Goddammit, so I apologise to you bc I knowyou said it in the ask. But to everyone else I’m not sorry because I loved writingit all and I WANTED TO GET IT OFF MY CHEST OKAY.

Good evening Nonny, and thank you for your interesting andwell-constructed ask. Judging by some of the rhetoric I’ve seen over the pastfew days, there’s a very real risk of people throwing up in their mouths overwhat follows so I hope everyone remembers to floss and brush afterwards. Look after your tooth enamel kids, it can’tbe replaced.

So. Let’s begin.

I very much agree with you: Bellamy and Echo are in lovewith one another.

WAIT – HOLD YOUR SICKBAGS – THERE’S MORE.

Not only are Bellamy and Echo in love with one another butit is explicit between them. That’sright friends, I am 100% sure that Bellamy and Echo have done that. No not that, although yes also that and lots of times upside down andprobably sideways too. No I mean they’ve done the Big ILU.

Why do I think that? A number of reasons but let’s startwith the storytelling.

If I were to construct a story in which one of myprotagonists falls back to Earth and immediately falls into conflict with arelative, another protagonist, let’s say a beloved sister, I would want thatconflict to mean something. In fact, I’dwant it to mean the most. And if that conflict was related to a romanticrelationship that one of these protagonists had, I would want all of those relationshipsto have high stakes so that I could really milk all the emotional impact of thechoices these protagonists make.

You know what doesn’t have high stakes? Lukewarmquasi-relationships in which nobody – or only one person - is truly invested.

And you know, if I were to really go to town on thisbrother-sister YOU CAN’T DATE [X] BECAUSE [REASONS] storyline, I may alsoconsider echoing a previous relationship that the other sibling had, which hadsimilarly high stakes and over which the two siblings nearly destroyed eachother.

See, I’ve seen the argument that Echo is a lot more intoBellamy that he is into her, and from a character perspective there’s a slimpossibility I’d buy it if it weren’t for the fact that we know that the show is setting up some kind of conflict betweenthe Blakes – in which Bellamy needs to actually give a personal shit about hisrelationship with Echo - or a complication between Bellamy and Echo thatultimately splits them up, which, again, requires Bellamy to feel that loss ifit if there’s to be any point to it at all.

And if, for example, I was also planning to break out an arcfor a character who hadn’t really had one before, for whom the audience hasonly really viewed through the prism of the protagonist POV, I would want that character’s relationshipwith my protagonist to reach its peak before I take her solo. Echoliterally breaking free of the chains of being something to Bellamy? Howvery meta.

So, from that narrative start point, if the show wants toconvince me that Bellamy and Echo’s relationship doesn’t have very high stakesfor them both, it’s going to have to work quite hard.

Which it does not.

Of course we all have our own personal experiences whichshape our perception of what “love” and “not in love” looks like. But for me? Bellamy and Echo in 501 is whatpeople in love look like. By which Imean physical and emotional intimacy, touching, eye contact, openness, synchronicityof movement, comfort, understanding, tenderness and, most importantly,communication.

Because what struck me about their introduction to us as acouple is that clearly, this is not the first time Bellamy and Echo havediscussed what their relationship means. This wasn’t, we’re going to the ground, don’t you think we ought to talkabout what we even are? This was: youknow that thing we talked about? Willthat change now we’re going to the ground? I’m scared. (and my babies, youshould be)

All of which, by the way is 100% the way loving, emotionallyopen stable long-term relationships work, or should do. Defining yourselves as a unit and constantlyadapting to the changing dynamic is a thing that happens in long-termrelationships. It’s a sign of confidence, not a lack of it. Which kiiiiiind ofleads me back to what I was saying in my original post about multishipping, inthat the point of Bellamy being in a relationship at all is the show punchingus with BELLAMY IS HAPPY, BELLAMY IS STABLE, BELLAMY IS IN LOVE, ALL OF THIS ISABOUT TO BLOW UP IN HIS FACE.

So, now that everyone has emptied their stomachs I’m goingto move on to Bellarke, and s5.

I’m going to find this hard to extrapolate, and I may needto revisit this after the Bellarke reunion because I feel Becho very much atmand Bellarke seems a bit…idk abstract? ButI know when I see them reunite I’ll want to break through space and time and physically make them smoosh their preciousfaces together.

Ahem.

So, you’ll have noticed that I spent a great deal of timeabove pointing out how Bellamy and Echo’s relationship looks like a normalloving long-term relationship. Now Bellarke, Bellarke is not that, not yet. Butthe thing is, it doesn’t matter. What Bellarke has is what I’d describe ascosmic. I don’t think it would matter where they were in the world, or whatsituation they were in, if they knew the other was alive they’d gravitatetowards each other. They’d always seekeach other out. In many ways, I don’t think they’re even conscious of it, orcan help it very much. It’s like a pullneither of them can resist, a presence that never leaves.

And the thing is, that while that is a very romantic idea andfrankly electric to watch on screen, it’s also quite scary. Their dependence oneach other and need for each other is life-affirming, yes. But it is also TERRIFYING for them both.Losing each other, or even the thought of losing each other, has driven themhalf mad in the past and pushed them to do crazy things.

Whereas Becho – and I mean this in a good way - is very muchabout choice. No, they didn’t choose to be stranded in space together, but theychose to forgive each other, put their animosity aside. They chose to do whatever it was they did(headcanon time: war stories and mythology, sparring and trig lessons) thatmade them bond. They chose their relationshipframework. They chose love. And I like that.

It’s mundane, but its life-affirming too in its own way andit is every bit as valid as Bellarke’s crashing-through-the-universenot-talking-about-it shitshow.

(Incidentally, this is one of the reasons I’m so in lovewith the time jump and Bellarke being separate but OK – breaking them out ofthe spiral they were in, and giving them enough joy in their lives to let themmake active choices about who they are to each other).

But I do thinkBellamy’s love for Echo is very context dependent. Did you ever have a friend that was a part ofyour life during a certain time? Those friends can be some of the most intense,meaningful relationships you have. Butwhen you move out of your shared context, you drift apart. I think that is whatcould happen with Bellamy and Echo. Ithink that being back on Earth could bring all of the reasons for theiroriginal antagonism back to the surface. They could find it hard to reclaimtheir dynamic with the ghosts of who they used to be - Clarke, Octavia and Azgeda – real andpresent and in front of them.

I think the stories they chose to tell themselves about eachother and their lives on earth (stories like “my sister will forgive you”), thestories that made the love they built possible, could start to dissolve as the realityof Earth sets in.

PREDICTION TIME: In short, I think the Bellamy we see inspace will not be the Bellamy we have by the end of the season. And that Bellamy won’t be able to love Echoin the way Space!Bellamy could, and I don’t think Earth!Echo will be able tolove Earth!Bellamy in that way either.

I won’t make a value judgement because all love is valid. Ithink Bellamy will love Clarke with the same intensity – even if they neverbecame romantic - until one or both of them are on a funeral pyre. But I thinkhe’s more than capable of loving someone else fully at the same time and for itto mean something. Love is not a finite pool.

#rach answers #becho #bellarke #the 100 #obviously i stand to be proved wrong about all of this #and you're free to come laugh at me in my inbox if so #i mean i'll ignore you but you can try

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lilmajorshawty · 7 years ago

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How does a season affect bc I honestly can't relate and can't tell. Like for example, a saw an anon say she's been having vivid dreams lately probably bc its pisces season and bc she has pisces venus.. Why's that? I just wanna know how seasons affect us in general. Ty 😩💕

Well since it’s coming up soon! Aries season: It’s where we have more energy! Where we are both impulsive and even more confrontational! The sun is moving into Aries which affects everyone differently it can either square your planets which might make you feel tense and trapped or it can be opposite or inconjunct which might make you feel as if you don’t have any direction to send out your energy! It could positively hit your planets and give you more of a carefree and even youthful energy during the season and so on! Aries season is about starting things over and the point of the year where we all really start to feel like “damn this is a new year” it’s about acting not thinking! It’s about the instincts rather than the mind. Ironically this is like spring brakes and when spring kicks off so for the most part adrenaline and even sexuality runs high during this time as if you’re finding yourself for the first time all over again. So think beaches and vacations and huge parties or even just think gyms and working out and just overall wanting to be on the go. Taurus season: it’s more about stability and security! This can be a season full of self love and even more reclusive behavior! People can be stubborn as heck and you might find yourself putting up a fight more than you normally would even if it’s not that serious. It’s a season about pleasures and enjoying others. Can be a lot of laziness and sloth during this time but a lot of sentimentality and love also! I’ve noticed it to be a time of relationships flourishing but it can be troublesome for relationships because Taurus is about security and if that isn’t something that is present in the relationship during Taurus season arguments can be heated and last FOREVER cause no one wants to back down or at least till Gemini season comes around. Gemini season: It’s about communicating and having a good time! Making connections is super easy during this season and social media is VERY lit during Gemini season really anything that has to do with the internet and electronics are at the center focus! Apps, cameras and so on. It can be harder to reach your emotions during this time and you may notice that this season takes you away from any “baggage” so in a sense Gemini season is about moving on from anguish and or anything that could be holding you back and letting go! It’s a mixture of freedom yet for a good cause! Similarly with Aries season harsher or positive - aspects to natal planets can show if this “letting go” will be good or bad. Cancer season: It’s a very emotional time like even more than Pisces season and Scorpio season lmao! It’s about home and comfort it’s about reflecting on the past even if it’s been 10 years. It’s the return of old lovers and the return of past habits and patterns. It’s you meeting the new you and seeing how much you’ve grown as a person! It’s that healthy emotional release! You’ll find yourself crying over things you’ve been over and you’ll also find yourself more distant and that if a homebody during this period!! People with positive aspects will grow a lot during this period maybe even become much more of a happier soul during this time! While those with the harsher ones especially if it’s to their natal moon might find themselves more in a depressive state or even just outright ignoring what cancer season is trying to do to them! But that being said you can’t really escape 😂. Sexual and emotional frustration run RAMPANT so this is also a time where flings start but also a very sexually active time due to how emotional fulfillment becomes tied to sex during this time. Leo season: Leo season is about drama! Lots of it aha. You may find that there’s a lot more tea being spilt and not in the “mysterious unsheathed” way like Scorpio but more in a dramatic and Worldly way! A way that draws attention! You’ll notice that you’re more confident and sharp during this time! Putting more time into yourself and loving what you’ve got! Romance is in the air! This is the end of flings and the start of something more teenage and childlike! It’s honest and curious! People are more blunt during this time and have an ego about them without realizing! People sure do have energy during this time though and aren’t afraid to make daring moves that they normally wouldn’t have. Virgo season: This season is about the earth! Surprisingly themes like global warming, drought, forest fires, animal relocation become very important during this time! Even stuff regarding earth itself from the view of space or in relation to other planets will be more spoken upon during this time! People are more quiet during Virgo season—passive and without much strife, it’s a season that most people take to become beauty gurus or even just focusing on their own health and maybe being even more critical of the health of others. Fashion and clothing are thought about conceptually rather then manifested which happens more in libra season. People may opt out of heavy makeup looks during this time and go natural! It’s a vulnerable season in a earthy way. And it’s a much easier time for people to help others without really giving it much thought.Libra season: Another romance season but more or so about the idea of it rather than actually being in one lmao. It can be hard to decide on something permanent this season and can be even harder to assert yourself mainly because the sun is uncomfortable here more so than any other sign; the sun likes to assert himself but in the presence of libra he loses the ability to do so in the way he likes. So people are a tad awkward this season but that’s fine since this season is about companionship and relationships both platonic and romantic that we form with others and nurturing that bond. Libra season is very peaceful and relaxed people don’t outwardly show their feelings which can make it a bit superficial emotionally but despite that their is a level of respect and manners that come during this season! Scorpio season: Ah Scorpio season its a very mysterious one! This is where we focus on the shadows! Every single one of us become fascinated with knowing the truth or what is out of our grasp! People can be more bit picky and intrusive and might start to dig and pry a bit to much. Scandals and lies tend to come out during this time especially with Jupiter in Scorpio to match. This is a time where things you normally able to leave alone may become obsessions now. Sex can be the theme of this season but more in the “how and why” sex is being used or occurs. This season everyone can be in edge and slightly dark! This season has to do a lot with truth and it often presents the question of wether or not those you surround yourself or even you is being truthful. Sagittarius season: Sagittarius season can feel warm! Exciting even! It’s a time where we feel limitless and free like we can do anything and everything! But that being said it’s also a time where we question life! It’s a time where we ponder and seek independence to figure things out! It can be a time of dissociation and self discovery but also a time of developing the lack of or the abundance of your own morals! Wether you’re harshly aspected or positively aspected in respect to whatever planet doesn’t matter as much here since Sagittarius is a benevolent planet! The main risk here is that you might run the risk of overindulging in something or someone if you’re not careful. Capricorn season: There’s two layers to this season. There’s layer one which occurs during the 1st decan of Capricorn which is Christmas time! This is the tender aspect! This is the slight level of responsibility we feel over our families and close loved ones to make them happy on that special day! It’s our willingness to help those who may not have anything and are desire to be kind to those we might not even know! Then comes Decan two and three which I like to call layer two of cap season which is the more intense part! Money matters and bills can pop up! It’s the recovery period where you have to face the consequences of what you’ve spent money on and your choices leading up to it! It’s when everything hits you in the face and feels like a month long hangover. People can disappear during this time and might grow a bit more somber. Aquarius season: This season can be hard to feel, you might not even notice it’s happening and that’s the point! Aqua season feels like “nothing” you’re not feeling much you’re not romancing the past or pondering on things you’re just living. It’s a time of dissociation and mental dexterity! Your mind is quick and even intuitive during this time! You want stimulation in a cerebral fashion and may be harder to reach with emotions during this time. This season is all about detachment, living in the moment and for the moment and nothing else! People are both chill during this time and even above there more messier emotions! Since this is an air season and the last one at that this can also be a time where electronics or media channels and or places either announce they’ll be shutting down or that they’ll be discontinuing their work and so on—this is also a time where new technology is either spoken on introduced! Usually in tandem with Gemini season. Pisces season:So we are currently in this one! So for starters Pisces season is intense it’s the last water season and it’s the last season of the previous year that walks into the present year so this can be overwhelming energy for most because it’s all of the year coming to an end! People can dream a lot during this time, vivid dreams. People can have moments of deja vu and even find themselves thinking about things from the year prior mainly because it’s as if everything is coming full circle. You’ll feel older during this season and might even start to slowly but surely feel like a snake shedding skin and abandon old habits and patterns previously plaguing you. As you’ll notice this is a more emotional time so sex is less of a focus here and intimacy is more of a priority! You might daydream more and even more so you might detach from situations more often! It’s a more simplistic moment in time without all the loud Noise. It’s about introspection and finally getting yourself ready for the new you that’ll come in Aries season. Hope this helps! And as a note aspects being made to your personal planets during these seasons Is important to look at as it gives you insight as to how that particular season will affect you! Example Aries season will square my sun Conjunct my moon and sextile my venus but it will square my mars and ascendant. My ego will be a little harder to express during this time and I might feel a bit more tension. And it’ll be a bit harder to properly assert myself(mars) during this time of even how I am perceived to others(ascendant) But emotionally ill feel great and might even have a complete make over on an emotional level and my sense of self and love nature might feel more free and relaxed during Aries season and so on!

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horndmanic-blog · 6 years ago

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falls over , design olive gamz33 bc im biased af

You guys get to see my incredibly complicated method of bloodswap determining. FIRST OF ALL, let’s make one thing clear! I use the naming convention of last name basis for bloodswaps- as it’s easier to keep track of and also happens to fit with kidswap naming convention.So, the boy we’re considering here is Gamzee Leijon!An olive baby.I tend to follow the rule of keeping the class changing the aspect, so Gamzee Leijon is a Bard of Heart.From here, I can determine things about his personality based on that classpect. A bard of heart is one that invites destruction of soul.This means that Gamzee Leijon is a bit of a follower- inviting the destruction of his own personality for the sake of not causing conflict and following the leader. Gamzee here would often go along with the louder or more emotionally stable of the group instead of speaking his mind or letting his thoughts be totally clear.A lot of personality is also based on luscii and how they’re raised by them. Because luscii are based on blood color, lusus situations switch with blood color. Gamzee was raised by Pounce, likely in the same cave canon Nepeta was raised in. For this reason, Gamzee picks up a love of cats, though not as obsessively as Nepeta- and probably also hunts to live.I headcanon bloodswaps gamzee become more addicted to sopor the higher up on the hemospectrum they are, and that anything below a teal is not addicted to sopor at all. This is because Gamzee is addicted to sopor to curb violent tendencies, which become more intense the higher up we go. Gamzee would also pick up Nepeta’s roleplaying tendencies because heart involves splinters, and Nepeta splinters via roleplaying. I would say Gamzee goes a step further, and very much becomes lightly addicted to Flarping as I headcanon Gamzee in general just has an addictive personality and easily gets attached to his methods of escapism.As a part of the Bard of Heart thing, Gamzee would know a very large amount about other people- but absolutely NOTHING about himself. He’d hide behind his usual “chillax” mask but be completely unaware of his own feelings in genuine. Eventually, during the game, something would happen that would make Gamzee unleash ALL of his emotions all at once and rather suddenly. I would even argue that this Gamzee has a high chance of going grimdark.I also think that Gamzee would replace “miracles” with “legends” and he would be the type to speak very frequently of legends and often utter “legend has it”s.A song that could be a good inspo for Gamzee would be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62RvnXZgHwQTL:DR: Gamzee Leijon is a Bard of Heart who is unaware of his own emotions and copes via flarping.That all said, here’s my design in my traditional style for a better look at what he looks like;

They wear a small scarf to keep warm in that cold cave, and a hood with cat ears on the back of it from a jacket he made sleeveless himself. He’s painted cat whiskers on himself via dead animal bloodHis sign changes from Capricorn to Caprilo (Prospit + Heart + Purple) and I decided to make his horns shorterHere’s an mspaint doodle for color guide.

OTHER TIDBITS:- handle is terminalCatnip- quirk is:// like this because i’d imagine he doesn’t purrfer to divulge his EMOTIONS but he still sometimes works in all CAPS randomly because its just a gamzee PURREFERENCE. cat puns still, but not as OFTEN.

#long post #long post//#gamzee leijon #THESE ARE FUN I WANNA DO MORE #hope y'all enjoy this #lovetiered

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blackwoolncrown · 7 years ago

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curious to hear your thoughts bc i think they're sharp, as a person still figuring out fandom. what do you think of the moral okayness of thorki (the ship)? they're brothers, but gods.... godly incest? at what point does "ship what you want" stop applying?

It’s not so much about where it stops applying. Understand that I actually never have said what people should or shouldn’t read- only that what a person chooses to focus on in general (and therefore including what you write, watch, or read) is indicative of something and in many cases of certain taboo* or violent material my heavy suggestion is that that something is ultimately meaningful.

It’s not ‘just’ fiction.

So like, me personally? I often don’t actually care what someone is into (with some logical exceptions), I care whether or not they’re aware of why, because often people would rather not inspect the why so they can keep enjoying problematic media (and also my actual Big Thing is I don’t approve of situations where someone engages in activity they are not fully aware of, because to me if you aren’t aware of the consequences or origins of your actions, you haven’t fully consented to what you’re doing and that makes me sad. Example: Do you smoke cigarettes? Fine! It’s your body; as long as you aren’t exposing non-smokers to second hand smoke, no one should have shit to say. But if you start smoking bc you believe that cigarettes aren’t actually bad for you and there’s no downsides, you haven’t fully consented and now I wish you either a) inspected your motives and actions or b) stopped).

Overall I suspect that many of the most vociferous defenders of ‘fiction is just fiction!’ are people whose interests often veer into what we often call taboo (I think that word is so ineffective) who don’t want to ask themselves why. My other general rule is that people are most doggedly defensive about what they get off to. There’s also the issue of people having already brought to question their fictive interests and instead of wanting to find out the answer, deciding There’s Nothing To See Here, Fiction Is Just Fiction! Or, on the cusp of identifying a maladaptive interest and feeling as if that’s an action of self-judgment, they identify with their fictive interest because to them judging it means judging themselves.

Ideally neither is necessary. You can just understand that you got into something at a previous time but you’ve grown past it, learned from it, and can walk away from it without shame. After all, it’s ideally just your business. All I’m saying is that you know what the fuck your business is, pardon my french, because people who don’t know themselves are….well, it’s an issue.So to answer your question, here’s another question: If Thor and Loki were not brothers, would you care as much? Imagine a situation in which Thor and Loki are not related, but still share a lusty rivalry. Is something missing? What is it? What about them being gods absolves, in your mind, the impact of their siblinghood?Often, something like sibling incest (which to me is, honestly, not my bag but obviously way less awful than parent/child due to a whole slew of issues with imbalance there) is exciting to people simply because either a) the incest is the barrier to love and in general barriers to love make ‘good’ stories because two people overcoming the bounds of a romantic limitation is a more moving story than two people who can love freely (bc we love suffering and strife! it seasons things, I guess lol) and the incest is just an easy yet huge barrier b) because we have a hard time working through something without sexualizing it and who could write or would want to read about two brothers’ having a heartfelt love/hate brotherhood? Very few people, apparently, because that’s not a valued interaction. Thus, add some fucking into the story and Thor and Loki can work out their antagonistic feelings without getting to the bottom of them because we imagine sex is an equalizer and a balm (it’s not, but I understand the idea has a huge place in erotic fiction and absolutely use it myself when I write for fun).That speaks, to me, of an issue (and I’m going to be specific here) with not really having the language or familiarity with the social concept of brotherly love to make a story about it and its struggles interesting. We don’t have the language and thus cannot conceive of brother/brother reconciliation without sex. And this again speaks of a larger issue our society has with sex and the huge void of emotionality between strangers and lovers (friendships, loyalty. non-sexual bonding? What’s that?). We cannot conceive of a way to intensify, for the sake of adult (in age, not nature) entertainment, something like siblinghood without using sex.

It’s just cheap writing.

On the other hand, the very real ramifications of this easy-route conflict writing is that it sexualizes and normalizes sibling incest (or other things in the case of other stories) and I think it’s incredibly callous to want to ignore the voices of SA victims in this regard. People like to retort that ‘well YOU might not be able to tell fiction from reality, but I can’ but here’s the thing: Your subconscious mind can’t. If your brain wholly knew that the fiction you were reading was Not-Reality the information would be irrelevant and would fail to produce an emotional response. The reason we are excited, aroused, sad, scared, angry, tense, etc during movies and books is because while we are focused on them our mind is interpreting the happenings as actual happenings. To the extent (!) that media ‘pulls you in’, your subconscious believes it, validates it, and signals responses accordingly. That’s why it’s entertaining.

I say this because something many fans of certain content don’t want to face is that the consumption and support of, and proximity to certain types of violent or taboo content starts to lessen your reaction to them. I’m not speaking as an outsider, here, and so I caution you and anyone else to second-guess the awareness of anyone who says ‘there’s no way that’s true!’. What you repeatedly experience becomes normal for you. This doesn’t apply as heavily with Thorki or similar ships bc of the conceptual complexity (it’s pretty far-removed) but there are certainly fetishes/ships where repeated exposure lessens your reaction to that concept in general. As if that doesn’t seem to be problem enough, since this is an issue of entertainment, this also means that a person seeks more of the content. After all, what fic fan reads just one story about their scandalous OTP? You need more, or more extreme versions. And I’m not talking out of my ass here- people for some reason love incest- it’s one of the top-searched terms on any adult media site for general consumption. On sites that it’s not, that’s only because the term itself is blacklisted and users use some other coded term. In the absence of pearl-clutching, we must recognize that smutty fiction and tube sites’ activities are largely the same. b/b m/s and f/d incest continue to draw attention and I honestly don’t know why.

And this is why I pay no mind to people who say that fiction has no effect on reality. Even if it didn’t, it arises from our reality. The real minds of real writers in the real world. And I’ve seen the results. I work with sex and fetishes- it’s my job. I know what people as a whole are into and I’m begging y’all: UNPACK THIS BAGGAGE. Soooo many fetishes are just maladaptive coping mechanisms, so talk of ‘fiction being just fiction’ are literally bullshit. Fetish, and the relative psychology of it, is my job, to the point that it’s also what I have to navigate to try and ensure my safety (by avoiding volatile fetishists) and income (my first job, for instance, was a porn artist, and by now I’m an adult content producer and prodomme). And again, many fetishes are the back end of intense or subconsciously formative moments in our lives. The attraction is not ‘the thing’, it is a thread us leading back to that moment, to learn from our experiences, to resolve past issues with the wiser perspective of our older selves.Again, there’s not much going on in terms of Thor/Loki here but on a wider scale there is. Often in fandom, for instance, it’s not really about the ship so much as the fetish. It’s disguised in the language of fandom, but people who have a bunch of incest ships are incest fetishists, full stop. There’s no difference in motive between them and the ~gross pervert guys~ reblogging porn gifs and adding incest prose to them. If geeks could more often find porn gifs that looked like their taboo OTP rest assured they’d do the same damn thing, most of them. Ficlovers like to act like their position is somehow more morally acceptable because there are no ‘real’ people involved like in porn, but whether or not a physical body is used to represent the characters/roles is a pedantic and nebulous distinction at best. Your interest is still your interest. And people are going to hate this, but it sounds so much like pedophiles on 4chan who say that their ‘fetish’ is okay because the characters aren’t real. Furries into cubs (not the gay dude kind but the baby animal kind) feel justified the same way because the figures are fantasy creatures. But they’re still expressly coded as the infantile versions of adult characters, and again, the motive is the same. I’m not saying ALL of these things are one to one, I’m saying it’s a similar logic: “This is a fantasy and as such it says nothing about me. It would only matter if I physically did it.” Which is dishonest and illogical bc one’s fantasies and interests arise out of their own minds. Porn consumption is a night map of the human social psyche. It’s not ‘nothing’.

Sure, most of those people would probably never touch a child, but that’s because the real world provides consequences the fantasy world doesn’t- not because they’re not interested. I know bc I’ve seen them say that themselves, many times. I was a 4chan teen. What was normal there would make a well-adjusted person puke. But I was maladaptive, impressionable and young at the time and it became normal for me. So many forms of incest, rape, pedophilia, bestiality etc became normal in the ‘shock makes things acceptable’ speed-posting culture of neverending offensiveness there. And that’s not just a 4chan thing. It’s a group anonymity thing. Any imageboard vet can tell you that. When you’re in the anonymous group, what the group does is what you do, and you go along with it, continuously being desensitized until you suddenly go WTF or…keep going. And having seen these arguments before, I’m wary of those who go to battle on the idea of all erotic fiction being totally beyond judgement, because often what is going on is that people whose interests should be judged, at the very least by themselves, argue against that so that there are other people who feel the same way who don’t realize they’ve been manipulated to cloak the offenders in their community.

But I digress.

Since my feelings on Killmonger fans* started this, I’ll offer an example of my own: I think AoU Ultron is hot. But I don’t actually want to fuck him. I wouldn’t be interested in any ‘reader x Ultron’ narratives. Why? Because despite my love for and identification with many villains (usually bc of their victim’s rage and queer coding which always leaves them far cooler and better dressed than the hero) and my love for robots, I can’t ignore that Ultron is a heartless, people-hating, death-machine. He has no interest in love, doesn’t care about anyone, and if he bothered to fuck a person (I fucking doubt it) he’d gladly fuck them apart. And since I love myself, I don’t find that appealing. If I found the idea of being fucked to death by a robot arousing, that says something about how I feel about my existence. I know bc I am strangely fascinated by the idea of armageddon (another reason Ultron appealed to me). Spoilers: it’s just easier to feel like you want the whole world to end when you’re so certain there’s no other solution and you yourself are afraid of the emotional responsibility of weathering the world and social interactions. When you love yourself and other people, the idea of seeing the world burn stops being so entrancing. So sure it’s an enthralling literary concept. Is it something I dedicate my blog to or obsess over?

No.

Other things I’ve examined- my love for robots. Do I find myself attracted to robots because they are humanoids you can objectify free of moral conflict? No, and that sucks for me bc that’s why most people like them and that affects the kind of adult media made about them (can you tell im bitter), it’s because I find humanoid robots to be something I can identify with, I see them as symbolically human, and relating to them is, to me, acknowledging that a human is also a construct with both programming and a will of its own it uses to explore and often fight that programming. My attraction to the concept of an automaton stems from my early realization that my own body is but a fantastic collection of parts, electric signals, programmed genetic data, pulleys and fuel. Amazing! Now that I know that, have I stopped consuming robot fetish media? Well yes but only because I can’t find any I like…but in general, no. I’m not ashamed of my attraction, I’ve unpacked it, faced it, and go on about my life. It actually did lessen the obsession, though.

So, to stay on point, sibling incest as a concept is IMO not ‘wrong’ to write/read about objectively but it is questionable to perpetuate, romanticize, fawn over, collect, celebrate, etc. Most problematic to me is the issue of how these ships are identified. Generally any time there are 2 handsome brothers in a piece of media, some not-small-enough contingency of the fandom assumes they’re fucking, and sees all forms of affection or antagonism between them as evidence of their lust.

What does this say about your ability to recognize sibling love? What does it say about the social value (or lack thereof) of the same? When ‘all feelings lead to sex’ is the overarching theme of our entire society, I can’t really say I am uncritical of concepts like hatesex and incest being so intensely attractive to people over, say, romantic love between two people who are not related by blood. A bit of a tangent but similarly while I get the chemistry appeal, the fact that ‘hatesex’ as a concept (two people who often express aggression, hatred, intolerance etc of each other being interpreted as actually masking feelings of attraction) is so popular is ripe for questioning. How far removed is it from “He picks on you because he likes you” and other maladaptive forms of “loving someone means hurting them…a lot” which are real actual problems people suffer for right now?

Plus, it begins to suggest as I said before that all forms of affection/relationship end in sex. Even if sex never happens, sex must logically be the apex of love if two characters who have any kind of affection, even if that affection is also seen in the presence of aggression (!) or a moral barrier (family bond), are easily assumed to be sexually compatible to the extent that fandom perpetuates.

So back to your point, this is again not really an issue (as far as where I’m coming from) with what’s right and wrong. It’s an issue of people needing to take responsibility for themselves and being curious about their own issues and interests. I’m not advocating for censorship- I’m advocating for people to enlighten themselves about themselves in which case a lot of ‘taboo’ media would be produced in a lessened capacity.

I find it interesting that when I ask “Why are you into ____?” people don’t answer that question, or seem unwilling to, since their first reaction is to flip out and cry censorship. No one seems to notice that that’s not what I’m actually saying lol.

I don’t care what people do, if it’s not hurting someone. I care that people know why they do what they do. I am critical of things and of myself. I think people should just dare to be critical. It’s a great tool for self-healing that doesn’t involve perpetuating damage.*I dislike the term taboo because it and the moral judgment it applies is a nebulous term that is used far too broadly. Incestuous pedophiles soften their interest by calling it ‘taboo’, but interracial relationships are also classed as ‘taboo’, thereby suggesting that the term is as loose as ‘whatever many people think is wrong’, which is clearly far too transient and easily-influenced. Often, I find, it’s used as ‘something that is morally objectionable for reasons we’re not going to explore, we’re just going to lump all this shit together indiscriminately as taboo’.

*Again, I don’t care about people who mainly think MBJ is hot as Killmonger, that’s totally logical. I question people whose fantasies specifically extend to Killmonger THE CHARACTER being seen as sexually attractive **because** of/specifically on the grounds of his general character (i.e. radicalized, violent, murderous, apathetic) and what kind of person would fantasize about being subject to a man like that.

#Anonymous #long post #long as fuck #and here's how I feel about things #mine #full transparency I have a robofetish blog #it rarely updates bc there's just not that much interesting content to me

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galimatios · 5 years ago

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sci fi ya au musings from twitter thread mostly nts

maybe i do want to write YA science fiction ya with gay and all my favorite self indulgent tropes and also plugsuits

I HATE MYSELF I IMMEDIATELY HAVE SCENES IN MY HEAD . ITS BEEN TWO GODDAMN SECONDS. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO THESE CHARACTERS ARE YET tjinking about those rooms in that one ep of black mirror where youcan program jt tk show whatever you want on the walls. maybe projection of virtual reality vs reality as a major motif. simulations and distance... long distance relationships during a war in space action too... have to think about an enemy but maybe we rag on capitalism a littlle maybe some conglomerate is fighting a proxy war using aliens vs the govt the protags are in the military for theme.. war sucks bye but also theres dynamics i want

UM I CAN PUT BIG MECHA INNNNNNNN YEAHHHH anyway i want 2 loyal dog dynamics to juxtapose w eachother + platonic soulmate type protag duo, best friends , one girl one boy, theyre both equally important, some SHIT happens and theyre forced on different sides at some point one loyal dog is treated well, like an equal, will follow x to the end of the world the other is Not treated well. i want to explicitly make that relationship abusive so i can point at it in the text itself and have other loyal dog be like , that's not love. abandoned loyal dog gets adopted by main duo, ends up in a relationship w one of them (whichever one makes it gay), im ship girl with side character who inspires tf out of her, sort of like. theyre competitive and the side character is light years more skilled but girl wants the challenge, wants the chase, is fueled by the prospect of catching up so "wait for me" LAYS DOWN NONE OF THESE CHARACTERS HAVE NAMES OR DESIGNS OR ANYTHING BUT IM ALREADY ATTACHED TO THESE CONNECTIONS mc pair: one techy soft boy nerd who just wants to protect his family so thats why he agreed to help develop/operate tech bc he thinks this is how he can help headstrong pilot ace girl who has no one but wants to prove herself and make a name for herself so she'll be remembered she wants to win glory for herself and comes off as super confident but actually she's just. asuka evangelion except she doesnt crash and burn so bad bc she has the boy who sees thru it, you dont have to try so hard probably happens after a fight where she's reckless hes not one to get mad but this time he's pissed bc she was exceptionally close to dying, yells at her, why do you keep trying so hard to die kinda snaps her back to reality he wants her to rely on him more bc that's what hes here for anyway loyal dog defects from enemy + meets this pair after other loyal dog suggests he joins the crew, tech boy is kind to Everyone but loyal dog FORMERLY AN ASSASSIN ???????? TYPE?? SNIPER?? develops baby crush girl sips her drink :3c

I HAVE TO THINK MORE ABOUT THEM BC OH NO THEYRE CUTE but girl is chasing after some nb femme prodigy who she's rivals with and admires for more than just her skill theyre both emotionally constipated idiots tho so its like. (hand touch) thats enough for 100 years there is. so much tension. and prodigy seems so perfect on the outside but is actually in some kind of super strict fucked up program bc of her skill, and she hated it and is suffering ace pilot is the one to barge in headstrong and fuck everything up and get her out of there girl believes prodigy is amazing. really. incredible. a part of her feels like she'll never catch up . but even so watching prodigy walk into the unknown unflinchingly resolute ... it's both sad in a way bc she's being left behind but also she wouldnt have it any other way bc she thinks forward is the only way prodigy should be facing. its what inspires her. that strength ... h they definitely settle down together in the future tho bc i need ththattt

"when this is all over" said the prodigy, "come find me" this is so self indulgent anyway plotwise once both the govt and the enemy r revealed to be equally bad the main cast defect to a revolutionary group. they will Not win within the span of the novel but theyll have a small victory, very les mis one day more flavored, and even if they did not win they stood for something they believed in, did something to try and tell the truth... also i need more of a cast so i can kill characters off nice now all i have to do is fill all this in with world building and action and stuff and ill have a novel so many sci fi things have done the 2 pilot mind sync emotional thing right so if i do the same thing no one knows if i took it from one franchise or another i need to twist it around a little but i may have ideas haha i can. totally make this a part of my fucking huge sci-fi au really wanna call main girl lane and main boy khemrin . .. i cant unsee the girl as rey flavored so shes ending up w red hair and irish, but boy is SEAsian with a huge family, loyal dog who defects is african, prodigy is asian, other loyal dog feels south american prodigy... astrid is her real name but she may have a codename fsr? idk why i feel it. icarus? assassin defector... something that starts with an o or a d other loyal dog... i need to think but i also need to figure out the personalities of their respective pairs inserts minh as evil one. done. maybe mephis adjacent character for the... no mephis doesnt care abt anyone BUT hed be a great side character OH god what if au jonah and ambrose oh boy. FUCK jonahs probably there for some special task bc hes. attuned to some shit idk

I GUESS IM GONNA DEVELOP AMBROSE MORE ive only written him as a young adult but as a teen hes angry and rebellious and got drafted, ended up being a simple foot soldier but he meets jonah and a lot changes jonah's there on top secret bullshit, same program as astrid definitely has some shit to do With Experiments. astrid has enhanced eyesight/coordination on top of being an ace combat pilot, i think jonah might be able to open up warp gates or limited pocket space mephis is evil scientist who doesnt care abt casualties

I'm thinking about unnamed pilot lesbians and i am. enamored immediately holy shit god they're both so goal oriented and focused but once the fighting is finally over they finally allow themselves to embrace the intensity of their emotions for eachother and i am fucking perishing they were essentially raised as child soldiers so it's this clumsy process of trying to figure things out for the first time, this kind of innocent but intense and blooming love between two hardened soldiers, the years of war coming away when they're together for the first time actually fuck i did name them but i'm still not sure about ace pilot girl? i want to name her lane or something monosyllable, maybe i'll revamp raine and make her this oc instead... either way i'm just. ugh. UGH. FUCK. holy shit they love eachother so much

I"M GETTING REALLY FUCKED UP ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF THE PRODIGY (ASTRID) DYING IN THE LINE OF DUTY or well at least goes missing, presumed dead but raine just... doesn't believe it. astrid can't die. she's too amazing. there's no way fucking. huge disbelief. she refuses? raine going on a near suicidal self-appointed mission against commander's orders to rescue her, khemrin tries to hold her back but he can't, she' fucking gone speeding off on one of the fastest scouting ships she can hijack raine finding her alive but barely conscious in a damaged cockpit floating in space for who knows how long, raine unable to open the hatch and get to her but anchors her ship to hers, NOT EFFECTIVE BUT HER ONLY REAL CHOICE w/o compromising the air seal. makes the journey back astrid barely makes it to the space equivalent of a truck stop (unaffiliated) and raine calls for backup in panic and tries her best to tend to astrid's wounds an feed her and she's fucking PANICKING but trying so hard to keep it together astrid wakes up and raine's crying i don't have anything specific its just really soft and raine never Does this god when they meet again after the war, raine running her fingers over the scar left from astrid's helmet shattering h raine in a tux and astrid dressed like a princess and raine kissing her shoe sorry im gay bye

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cookinguptales · 7 years ago

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update: lmao I am so fucking doped up right now. sorry to the world that I got behind on shimamatsu translations, but have you ever tried to translate while on muscle relaxants? it’s a bad scene. god, I’m in a lot of pain rn.

gonna talk about some of the movies from the film festival below the cut. doped up af but I’ve seen like 14 movies so far, hella. tomorrow I probably have to skip bc I just took two cyclos and that is gonna fuck me the hell up.

movies I’d recommend:

thelma a norwegian film which is basically a coming-of-age story for a fundie christian girl who goes to college and realizes she’s a lesbian. oh, and that she has insane supernatural powers. (it’s kind of carrie-ish but with canon f/f, but imo a lot better than carrie.) the love story is really interesting, if incredibly dark. like if you’re in the mood for dark, kind of mindfuck-y f/f, this is your film. despite the very long upcoming list of potential triggers, it’s not as scary or brutal as it sounds. lmao. highly recommended, probably the film I’ve enjoyed most so far. (tw: violence, nudity, drug use, death, [spoilers] child abuse, possible mind control, child death)

custody a french film based on a short film that I saw a few years ago, and it’s fantastic and gut-wrenching. the short film was about a woman running away from her abusive husband with her children; this feature-length film is about what happens when a stupid judge ignores what both the wife and children have to say and gives him joint custody. (spoilers: it doesn’t end well.) interestingly, it has all the same cast as the original short film, though the kids are markedly older. idk if it’s meant to be a straight sequel or if one just inspired the other. really well done, tho, I was fuckin white-knuckling it in the theater. people were like. yelling. the climax of that film is INTENSE. probably the best quality film we’ve seen so far, though I think the plot could’ve been tightened up a little. (tw: very explicit depictions of physical and emotional abuse, very terrifying moments. [spoilers] but no child death.)

I, Tonya tonya harding biopic. I’m not really a big one for biopics, but this was a good one. it tried to explain how harding’s life led her to where she got, but didn’t necessarily paint her as some innocent victim. it was sympathetic where it needed to be, empathetic where it needed to be, but rarely let her get away with bullshit. lot of good performances here, but Margot Robbie (even though she looked way too old for the part) did a great job. (tw: explicit child/spousal abuse)

the villainess Korean lady-gets-revenge-on-shitty-men bloody action flick. not really my genre, admittedly, but I feel like anyone who likes this kind of movie would really enjoy this one. very Kill Bill-esque. it’s the story of this girl who basically gets passed around between illicit assassination organizations, in-fighting, revenge on all those who wronged her, etc. it is Very Bloody and many people die. the action scenes are HQ if you are into that kind of thing. I was mostly invested in the huge amounts of f/f potential. like at one point she joins an assassin organization where all the operatives are female and that whole part of the movie!! was very gay!! the actual canon relationships are het, but there is a strong potential for dark f/f murderwives here. (tw: haha oh boy if it’s a problem it’s probably here. implied CSA, child abuse, creepy relationships, violence, gore, nudity, child death, everyone else death, non-con facial surgery...like it’s bloody af okay...)

love means zero this is a documentary about nick bollettieri, who’s this super famous tennis coach. (apparently.) I knew next to nothing about the world of professional tennis going into this documentary, but I still enjoyed it bc wtf this guy is a piece of work. it’s basically all about how he fucked over a ton of people (especially kids) when he was trying to make tennis champions. and how he succeeded! by fucking over a ton of people! the interviews with him are honestly kind of wild bc he’s just such a crazy narcissist. this was especially weird for me to watch bc I grew up in the sarasota/bradenton area and never even knew all this shit was going on there. it was weird seeing my hometown on the screen like that, but also interesting. (tw: child abuse, just generally being a fuckboi)

MOVIES THAT WERE OKAY but like I had Issues

brimstone and glory I feel like I really recommend going out to see this one if you can see it on the big screen. it’s a documentary about a fireworks festival in Mexico and honestly the cinematography is stunning. it’s just so, so, so cool. but the actual documentary part is kind of boring sometimes, and you gotta have a strong stomach bc it also shows some of the injuries people get at this insane festival. like I don’t think showing that is a bad thing; I think it’s the only responsible way to make a documentary about this festival. like it’s amazing, it’s so cool, but also these people are like. going blind, losing hands, dying. and taking their kids!! like if you cannot handle watching kids in dangerous situations, don’t go!! dad was freaking out, lmao. (tw: graphic depiction of real-life injuries)

radiance a Japanese film about a woman who writes audio description for blind movie-goers. the same director made An (Sweet Bean Paste) a couple years ago, which was notable for its depiction of what Japan does to its citizens who have Hansen’s Disease. (leprosy.) it was weird to me when that movie came out that none of the reviewers really talked about that aspect of the movie; they were all like “UGH IT WAS SO POINTLESS AND CLOYING” and I’m like “did you miss the point of the movie?? which was critiquing the social ostracization of these people in Japanese society??? did that completely go over your heads????” anyway, I appreciated the depiction of PWD in Japan bc having lived there while disabled, I know that shit isn’t easy. that’s why I went to go see radiance. it was...okay? I think the most interesting part was when they let the blind characters talk. the movie was otherwise pretty pretentious and self-indulgent. lmao. like... it’s a rent, don’t buy situation.

marlina the murderer in four acts this movie was not bad! it’s an indonesian film about a woman whose home is invaded and she kills all the invaders. it’s definitely a film that critiques misogyny in indonesian culture, but I feel like it undercut its own message by showing such incredibly graphic rapes. like honestly, I don’t really ever recommend movies that have very graphic rape scenes, but I guess she does end up killing her rapists during the rape scenes. I just. I feel like it could have been done in a way that won’t get people all sexually excited while watching a violent rape. : / y’know? other than that, though, I really liked the female characters in the movie and sympathized with marlina’s journey trying to get society to help her and realizing she had to just go it alone with her female friends. bc like. she’s attacked by men, but she’s also revictimized by shitty ordinary men all the time she’s trying to get to town, report the attack, etc. and so are the other female cahracters. so they just. have to be vigilantes. (tw: GRAPHIC rape, violence, mild gore, spousal abuse)

newton Indian film about a guy going out to the jungle to get votes in the main election. but like. none of the people out there even know who the candidates are, there’s a lot of anti-government violene, the villagers are caught between anarchists and the police, it’s just a mess. and I do think the movie was good at showing the futility of it all and showing how the people who really end up getting fucked over are the poor people in rural areas, but at the same time like. pacing was uneven, tone was ???, and I found the protagonist irritating. and there was what appeared to be some pasted on het which made no sense. (like honestly I cannot figure out why she ever wanted to talk to his dumb ass again.)

blade of the immortal it’s takashi miike making blade of the immortal. I mean. I feel like if you are familiar with those names, you already know if you want to see it or not. if you aren’t, idk how much you’d like it anyway. after already having watched miike’s ace attorney adaptation, I sense a pattern. the guy just looks at a HUGE corpus (like a VG with 5 cases, or a manga with 40 volumes) and is like “welll....then I guess we better make things fast.” so you have Big Bads being introduced in the same breath that they get killed, 30-second backstories, just a frenetic pace and a huge amount of information, and it’s confusing and overwhelming if you don’t already know it. and honestly, I haven’t read BotI so I can’t say how faithful this was. but if you already love the characters and just want miike’s trademark bloody action flick style, then I mean. fair enough. this here’s a bloodbath. I had a hard time getting emotionally invested as a fresh viewer, tho. highlight of the evening: an old man walking out grumbling about how he only likes classy martial arts movies, and apparently this did not qualify. having seen a lot of classics of the martial arts genre, still unsure what a “classy” martial arts film looks like. (tw: offscreen rape, death, blood, gore, just an unreasonable amount of killing honestly like it was funny by the end, attempted CSA)

gemini this is a “neo-noir” thriller. so essentially a murder mystery. unfortunately, the title of the movie basically gives away the entire story lmao. so while the build-up wasn’t bad, the entire last 15-20 minutes of the movie are a total letdown. it was nice to see canon f/f, I guess, but I feel like the movie never went in hard enough on that. like were they trying to make a point about how hard it is for celebrities to have same-sex relationships? I’m not sure!! I can think of a lot of things that would make this plot more interesting, but they just didn’t do them. acting was fine, I guess. John Cho was in it, even if his character was pointless. Zoe Kravitz is always fun. (tw: I mean it’s a murder mystery. so...murder.)

DID NOT ENJOY

scaffolding (israeli film, boring af)

the workshop (french film, kind of boring, makes questionable points about neo-nazis)

#haha I'm dying squirtle #if anyone wants a full review on any of these I'd be happy to #these are just some hot takes #i tonya #thelma #custody #the villainess #love means zero #brimstone and glory #radiance #marlina the murderer in four acts #newton #blade of the immortal #gemini #scaffolding #the workshop

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