#just a great night all around
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realised yesterday just how often hozier actually used to sing about being not quite alive, not feeling like a person, about loving someone in a way that defies death and made him more alive, about suffering death for love. it's like he was constantly being buried underground and unearthed by love, over and over, which, while romantic in a way, is also incredibly sad. but i think it's interesting how his latest album (literally called 'unreal unearth') takes this idea and makes it its central theme. that's what this album is, one man's descent into the underworld. except, crucially, he makes it to the other side, and ends the album saying the darkness will come again, but this time he is "never going back [to hell] again." it feels like such a full-circle moment considering the rest of his discography and i'm so very excited to see what comes after this
#idk he might go back to being buried and unalive but maybe this is really the end of that...#when he was singing his most popular non album songs during the concert yesterday i was like huh he really does#sing about death a lot. interesting#hozier#it was great btw! he sang abstract and francesca AND jackie and wilson and cherry wine and movement#so all my favourites basically#and hearing take me to church live was actually such a slay which i was not expecting#and he talked abt gaza which i was so happy abt and was very grateful towards his band and crew#just a great night all around#jasmine has thoughts#i knew it was a lot bc that's kind of his reputation (boo) but i didnt realise how much it actually is
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Council of lovefools.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang yanli#jiang cheng#They don't have an actual sleepover in this scene but the vibes were so sleepover coded...I had to get them cozied up.#Late night talks with friends and family are some of the best conversations.#My siblings and I used to have room sleepovers with each other (Actually an excuse to stay up and talk about runescape)#Currently my flatmates and I also have really great heart to hearts late into the night.#Pondering shit like 'What defines confidence?“ and ”Why are people terrified of letting themselves fall in love?"#All that aside; There is a really great conversation between JC and WWX here. They are so close and yet so far way from each other!#Fundamentally they *agree* about many things - but JC now has to play the role of someone more 'mature'.#His temper is reigned in and he had to take a more nuanced approach. Whereas WWX can be far more reactionary.#JC has changed to become someone more mature (or at least he is trying).#Contrast this attitude with the scene *right* after where WWX literally goes baby mode with JYL. Rolling around going “I'm Fwee years old”.#When children are hurt we comfort them with hugs and warm food and a laugh. It's not enough when you're an adult. It's not simple anymore.#WWX is stuck in the past when everyone else is shifting and moving on! It's a depression allegory (and just...actual depression)#But we also get to see how some things have stayed the same. They still bicker about soup. They still tease. They are still together.#They all care for each other very much but they are struggling against trauma and are not equipped to talk about it.#You can't really blame WWX for being so protective over JYL. But JC is right: “You don't have a say in who she likes.”#It may have started as an arranged marriage but *she* is *choosing* what her heart wants. JC sees that. WWX cannot.#The final act of love is letting go after all.
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Do you think Jesus ever felt homesick. Do you think he missed his mom
#wolfy religious tedtalks#thinking about tjat time i went to china for like two months#for a study program#and i had a banger time it was great#but when i went to bed at night id sort of just sit around#and it was already like 11 pm and my parents were asleep#i couldnt really call them#but id sit and read or watch some videos or eat noodles and check the clock and look at that its 2am#what i wouldnt give for a hug right about now#do you think that after all his miracles he would crawl into an unfamiliar bed and he would think of his own in nazareth
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The Wayne doll house
Have some haunted doll au, since it's been bubbling away in my mind.
The bat cave is large and sprawling, many layers and tunnels and hollowed out cracks in the walls. It takes many years to fully reinforce to prevent stray kids from tripping into stagnant waters or fall down crags as he once did. The doll cave, as it becomes known, is in one of the deepest, darkest corners, one where the lights of the furnished caverns above don't reach.
It's one late night sitting at the computer when it suddenly occurs to Bruce that his first encounter with a doll was at the well entrance, many levels above.
There was nothing there when he went back.
-
The justice league stared at the subaru. The subaru, having no eyes, did not stare back.
The seven of them had just finished a very long, arduous mission, and narrowly escaped government censure after the base they'd been raiding had turned out to belong to some corrupt official. With the alert up, they couldn't escape through city airspace, or even in their hero suits.
So civilian it was.
Batman had hotwired some bloke's car while the rest of them ducked into alleys and shop bathrooms, but the problem remained. There was seven of them. And five seats.
"I can shift into something more suitable for being carried," suggested j'onn, "but I believe one of us might have to hide."
"Foot well?" Hal tried, and everyone looked around at the tall, bulky, broad heroes.
"Think they'd have to go in the boot," Barry finally said. Everyone immediately turned to him. "No."
Batman spoke up before the discussion could devolve.
"I think.... I would be best for that."
The team stared.
"Batsy?"
Having no lungs meant he could not drag in the tired sigh he wished, but whatever force allowed this body to talk was capable of approximating something suitably resigned.
"As I am, I am... incapable of fully passing as human. It would be best if I remained out of sight."
"So just? Go change? I swear we won't be weird about whoever you are under the mask. Even if you're like, bald."
"Thank you, Wally, but I'm afraid I'm being serious." Reaching for the mask in broad daylight was unpleasant, but the glue and wires held as he gave it a few thorough tugs. "It doesn't detach."
Everyone stared. Clark reached out as if he wanted to check, but withdrew.
"Do you even have a civilian identity??" Oliver eventually asked. "Because at this point I'm genuinely not sure."
Wayne Enterprises and Queen Industries had a meeting that same evening. "Hn."
"Can we go back to the 'incapable of passing as human' part?!"
"We can discuss it in the car," he snapped, stalking past Barry and popping the boot. "In case you haven't forgotten, we're on a time limit."
For once, that seemed to encourage them, and batman, with great dignity, folded his joints and cape into the small space, ignoring Hal's mutter of 'what kind of contortionist -' as he slammed the lid. With a little shuffling he managed to activate his comms.
"I will inform the watchtower of our delay."
"Batman, they're tapping all outgoing signals, you can't -"
"It won't trigger," he interrupted, before he twisted his consciousness and sent it spiralling across the country.
Bruce awoke with a groan, stretching his limbs and taking a moment to marinate in his annoyance before he reached for the comm and voice modulator on the beside table.
"Batman to watchtower, we've encountered delays. If the Texan state government calls we haven't entered the state in six weeks. Batman out."
-
"Alien?"
"No."
"Reanimated corpse?"
"No."
"Uh... Demon?"
"Hm. No."
"You're not just a meta human, are you?"
"No."
"Vampire?"
"No."
"Robot??"
"No."
"Batsy, please, someone's got to win the bet eventually. How do we even know you're not lying?!"
"You don't," Batman said, not looking up from his paperwork and Flash groaned, letting his sticky notes fall to the floor as he buried his head in his arms.
"One day," he bemoaned to the keyboard, "one day we'll figure it out."
"Until then please keep your eyes on the monitors."
Flash groaned again.
-
Robin ducked under superman's arm as he scuttled down the corridor, laden with the night's haul of snacks. The real problem wasn't getting them - stopping league members from raiding the kitchen would be extremely counterproductive - but keeping them until he could return home to his human body to eat them. Batman had started searching him each time they left and it was really cutting into his daily sugar intake. Unfair! Just because he didn't actually use energy to stay up my night to fight crime, it felt like he did!!
'Oh, you're broken, Robin, oh, don't go out until the glue has fully set, Robin' his arm was fine! It wasn't like there was much crime to be fought on the watchtower anyway! At least not physically.
So he was pretty pleased with himself until he went to set the snacks down and found that the tar like glue they used had soaked through the sleeve and gotten all over his chocolates.
With his other hand, he tried to pry them off, wincing as the wrappers tore and stuck. He tried to shake it, ignoring the way his elbow rattled in the joint.
"Come on, come on - aw, cheezits."
The arm fell off. Robin stared despondently at the limb, surrounded by torn wrappers and dripping black glue where it connected to the elbow. The sour stink of formaldehyde filled the air.
He was going to be in such trouble with Bruce.
The click of the door jerked his head up.
Flash stood in the doorway, wide eyed. Robin stared back.
Flash screamed.
Oh yeah @dehydratedmockingbird have a thing
#batman#Possessed doll au#bruce wayne#justice league#cryptid batman#Cryptid batfam#Didn't fit in there but I wanted to include that every bat member has a mask that covers their mouth#They've all got nutcracker jaws#I don't know the technical name but you know the ones where only a block moves for the mouth and the cheeks don't?#Super creepy on a life size thing I'd imagine#So if their mouth guard or mask gets ruined guess who's having nightmares that night!#Normally cryptid batfam go to great lengths to Look Inhuman and these guys still do it's just easier to not get joints jammed if you cover#Them up. Doesn't mean they haven't pavloved the whole criminal underground into terror at the sound of wooden clacking#They can turn ALL their joints 360 and it terrifies the average goon when you try to sneak behind a bat and it just swivels around to lock#With you. They grapple by shooting their hands out (so they can't lose their grapples) and it doesn't look nice. Yes they use it to#High five from across rooftops or grab things. Punch people in the face from the rafters. (pie the joker)#Their outfits look painted on (they mostly are). Ears swivel. They each have gliding wings installed in their backs after a scare with ivy#Clark was too polite to ask about the rattling and hissing noises he made until one day he was scouting with xray vision glanced over#And nearly screamed XD#long post#long tags
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this post had a theme but i dropped it . anyways im listening to a bunch of childhood songs Good morning and goodnigghttt i wake up at teiiilightt
the warrior cat is meant to be scout. you cant tell. sorry hes a bengal i was just too lazy to color him. i was too lazy to finish the three cheers thing too cuz i didnt like it. sorry
#tf2#team fortress 2#tf2 engineer#tf2 soldier#tf2 scout#sniperspy#helmet party#why did heathers come up on my tags I AM NIT GOING BACK!!!#great musical though!!! would reccomend#the medic thing has context hence why my old pyro is there#guys can you tell i really like drawing rawcoon. can you tell i really like rawcoon#cinfession hwen inwas like 9 i thought scout was a fnaf character#and i thought he was a canon night guard. because he was in all the sfms#anyways my parents r yelling apparently because there is a reptile? in or around our home?#they do not knownif it is a snake or a lizard?#there is just a mysterious reptile? roaming around?.. our home????#update: it is apparently a lizard#update again: i went outside to check. my dad says its a lizard. it looks like a fucking worm#not even like a snake. like a worm. it looks like a fucking worm#so a worm shaped lizard was in our home#anyways is it bad that when i get tired i start thinking soldier is a baddie#liek i knew engineer was but soldier... damn#anyways tired as always ok goodnight
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He said "Fuck this shit, I'm out" I'm crying. Toriyama's Vegeta was so top shelf 🤌
(From Neko Majin Z Chapter 5!)
#dbtag#Idk why Toei didn't lean into Vegeta being a version of Piccolo you could put in funnier situations like Toriyama wrote#He's reserved and professional and proud but JUST immature enough to bite down on a gag that Piccolo would readily swerve#But they take a lot of Goku's chaotic comedy away too in favor of Hero(tm) writing and that is why I keep pulling my hair out aklsjdlas#Toriyama was sO funny and it bums me out so much that the anime derailed how lighthearted and straight up silly the humor is#and replaced it with Misogyny Is Funny and humiliation kinks asjklfhadjk and it's not just my complaints about Vegeta and Bulma!!#“Goku is running away from his very reasonable wife because he is a goofy little guy who doesn't want to do his chores” becomes#“Chichi is Cruel to Goku who is Trying to be a good husband because she doesn't relate to his passions and vilifies him for having them"#which is not their dynamic at all but dudes in the writing room are like “being married is fucking awful amirite fellas hahaha”#but Toriyama was like “Being married is not for everybody but it can be really great if you and your partner are on the same page”#Chichi's reasonable! And Goku isn't romantically wired but Goku can enthusiastically consent to sex and still not enjoy kissing#those things can be and are true for a lot of people! And it makes even more sense if you hc Goku to be aspec (and audhd coded) like I do#Kissing can feel gross and can be a sensory overload for many folks. Doesn't mean they're stupid or innocent.#(although Goku CAN still ride nimbus so idk what Pure entails in this universe askljad)#Like I am the FIRST person to joke and drag Goku about his marriage as an aspec myself but like legit Goten is a Last Night On Earth baby#He knows what sex is. But also between how socially removed Goku is and how Shy and Conservative Chichi it's not out of line#to assume the actual words sex and kiss have never been spoken in that house skljdlajdf I FULLY believe Chichi uses code words#Chichi thinks her son being blonde makes him a delinquent and still uses honorifics with Goku like it is fully reasonable to assume#that the joke of Goku's naivetè centers around the fact that his wife is too embarrassed to talk about Certain Matters in a normal way#While Bulma and Vegeta are slutty hedonistic cityfolk who need jesus (according to chichi probably...and me but I support them)#anyway. point is. Toriyama was funny as hell and Nekomajin is absolutely ridiculous and goofy and has a fully amoral main character#which just reminded me that toei is allergic to letting goku be a gremlin and so vegeta's not allowed to be a gremlin wrangler#even though that's been his job since the day he met raditz alksdjaskljd
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Really the biggest problem with the Great Gatsby on broadway is that they made Nick Carraway 90% less bisexual, and really that alone should've had them barred from the Tonys
#wacky watermelons#the great gatsby#yes i just saw it today dont @ me#really through my mother's singular obsession with jeremy jordan and my seemingly general interest in classic lit all things are possible#my mom got locked into conversation with a ~13 y/o who had turned around in her seat to talk about jeremy jordan + plays in general#so really she met her match#and i was sitting in the seat next to her rambling out the play vs the book and accidentally spoiling a very good bit of staging#(spoilers) the pit is dressed as a pool. the pool ladders are a permanent fixture and really are quite ominous once you notice them.#ANYWAY#i will not repeat my mini essay that i sent in the discord. i guess you can ask and i will. i do love talking. but here i will not#good night. i hope every day they send gatsby an american myth to broadway#edit: if you saw me mispell his last name. no you didn't <3
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confinement arc where L tortures light with more hands-on methods......
#what if he chained him up and beat him and waterboarded him and broke his fingers and called him a pretty little murderer? what then?#would light give up his memories right away? would he give them up and suffer without knowing the truth thinking this is all unjust#and an abuse of power against an innocent? would it corrupt his view of L? would he even be willing to work with him afterwards? would#he do so just because he felt threatened? or maybe he'd keep his memories as long as he could because he'd be stronger knowing the#truth. maybe he'd keep them until he doesnt know if he could take it anymore and might end up confessing. maybe he'd keep them#so he could still have ryuk with him through as much as possible or maybe he'd give them up because ryuk is just another cruel#spectator. uncaring to his suffering#and would L torture light himself? would he make another person do it? would he allow the task force to bear witness? would anyone tell#soichiro? or would L do it himself in the middle of the night when nobody is there to stop him? maybe nobody would know at all. maybe#L would creep down to light's room and wake him up and try to get him to confess any way he could before the task force comes in the#morning. he might be careful not to leave marks so nobody knew. or maybe he'd not care. just make excuses. he's L why would#they question if he had anything to do with light''s head bleeding from when he fell out of bed in the middle of the night. or when he#had bruises from tripping when nobody was around. he's the great detective L. he's justice. he'd never hurt anyone......#anyway i think L should've tortured him more. dragged him out of his bed and waterboarded him in the bathroom. beat him while nobody#was around and choked him until he passed out because he wouldn't confess to being kira etc#and would misa get the same treatment too or would L not care to break her as much as he would light?#*sighs dreamily* there's just so much potential in torture....#no i am not working on the torture prompt for kinktober rn why do u ask.........
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Late Night quick thing (New Age Sillies)
Bad news: That joke post about including Reset + Orchid is definitely not canon. (I legit got sad thinking about Reset being in a universe where Orchid isn't- because their stories are so so intertwined- but Nightmare 100% would NOT risk the whole twins exploding Error's soul thing.)
Good news: This means I COULD include Kane (Reset's older brother who usually dies in timelines where Reset is born) and use it to develope his character a bit more! Also! Perhaps a Blue × Dream kiddo is finally in the stars for me to design?
#new age au#really enjoying the idea of Reaper + Geno having an heir at some point (and them sending that heir over to Night's kingdom for#exposure to other places as well as to hang with his third cool knight dad who's hard at work 🙏)#Kane has little to no development besides being a perfect angel (foil to Reset's eventual turn to poor choices) so I'd love to do#to him what I do to every oc of mine. (Namely: Throw them into the Kingdom and see what they do.)#oh! and I could see Blue and Dream (beloved boys) listening to the warnings of possible complications if they try to have a lil babybones#and Dream deciding he'd take the risk and carry the growing soul#(<- though tbf this is MANY years into the future and they'd be well established knights of the realm)#i'm not evil so they *would* manage to avoid the twins curse and have a singular beautiful babybones#they'd get raised partially on the move but stay behind with Night and Error if the two had a more dangerous mission#and grow up to be an obnoxiously powerful warrior following after their dads#(but they'd probably be hesitant to follow into the footsteps of being a knight and might go on a quest with friends before choosing a#final path for themselves)#<- Most spoiled rotten kid ever. courtesy of Nightmare and Error and all their extended family <3#oh last note. Ancha has me cracking up w/ ideas for Cross potentially meeting someone and I was beamed w/ an old ship request post I saw and#I think it'd be funny to include Lust in here somehow... (probably call him smth else as a nickname but y'know-)#like. He works in the city around the castle as some sort of... idk tailor? and he's been making things for Nightmare for years without#knowing because Ccino always was discreet about the orders and providing measurements + always tipped well so it was none of his business#but one day it's like. before a big announcement ceremony or smth and Ccino drags Cross in by the scruff because no one can get him to get#clothes that actually fit aside from armor (hc he steals the others clothes a lot and wears 1 shirt until it's threadbare)#so Ccino makes him go to Lust and Lust is able to get him fitted for sone new outfits because. well. Lust doesn't do much but he's very very#handsome and Cross is super easily flustered and shy around new people and he's awkward and aughhh.#and then he thinks about the interaction for the next month before deciding he's going to ask Ccino to go back there again.#and Lust likes dressing Cross up in new outfits (everyone thinks it's great Cross is loosening up and meeting new friends cuz Lust introduce#s him to people in town) and it takes forever for Cross to get over his worries and ask Lust out to a ride on his horse (romantic. of course#) and Lust agrees because he's charmed.#and the best part would be Cross *actually* manages to keep it a secret. like. no one finds out until one morning Killer bursts into Cross'#room to wake him for surprise training and it's Cross. the weird Dog. and- holy shit did Cross have someone over???#Cross pulls the cool ones frfr 🙏#it's just a casual thing between them with little plot relevance or drama I think. just a chill lil relationship 🙏
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update on the whole tooth situation: I need surgery 🙃
#ngl it’s been a……ROUGH 24 hours#barely had much sleep and the pain has been near constant and terrible#and got probably the worst news I could have gotten for this so just not feeling great all around#but I’m on antibiotics and painkillers. just been white knuckling it through the night hoping it gets easier#I think it is#anyway idk how active I’m gonna be in the next few days#and it’s my birthday tomorrow….who knows how that’ll go now#I have the best friend in the entire world though who has been with me through this whole ordeal 🥹
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i haven’t planked in months and i was worried that i would fall over within seconds so i used the lazytown theme song of all things to time myself. i planked for over a minute straight! maybe not much but i’m proud of it since my personal best is like 2 minutes. then i did 5 pushups and 10 sit-ups [my old daily routine] and was just as pleasantly surprised to see it wasn’t that bad! call me autistic but the lazytown binging is working on me. this is for you, sportacus 🫡
#a few months ago i was working out relatively excessively and had SO much energy and just generally felt great#like. i had never been happier with my energy levels and physical state. a super light and manageable routine was all it took#i wanna get back to that and stop using “school 4 days and work the other 3” as an excuse not to do these simple things#which improve my life SO much#and i’ve been going on 3 mile walks on campus too. thank god for the wonderful walking track around the pond#my poor asthmatic lungs need this 😭#gear diary#oh god and not to mention cutting back on the sugar. like… i ate a bag of raw vegetables for breakfast one day?#and recently had a pear and an apple for dinner one night?? returning to my roots of eating like a fucking rabbit in a greenhouse#AND i’ve resisted the urge to eat the usual processed sugary snacks lately. WHICH IS A HUGE DEAL FOR ME#i’m just so proud of myself yall and i need to brag#TO BE CLEAR i’m not becoming a carb counting health nut here i still eat the same exact stuff with the exception of less sugar#and i don’t intend to ever change that. i love food and flavor too much lawl! i’m just trying to also absorb nutrients and stay active 🫶
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Welcome to the Dungeons of Fear and Hunger.
#Fear and Hunger#D'arce Cataliss#Cahara#Ragnvaldr#Enki Ankarian#Unlike Dungeon Meshi - I cannot in good faith recommend this game to a broad audience.#My background with F&H goes as follows: I am hanging out with a friend. He says “hey try this game I've been playing.” I say “Okay!”#I have never heard of this game. I pick the mercenary. I go through 5 min of character history and background. I am mauled to death by dogs#It took me 4 resets to even get in the dungeon. But I finally get there. I am caught by a guard. He cuts off all but one of my limbs#I am forced to crawl around in a blood and corpse pit until the game tells me 'give up idiot'.#I reset. I am mauled by dogs again. I realize this is not for me but I am intrigued enough to go home and watch some playthroughs#And WOW what an interesting game it is! I really do appreciate games that blend their design philosophy with the theme it wants to set#This is a game about fear and hunger. And persevering. And penis (my god is there a lot of penis)#I recommend this to people who like extremely challenging games and can handle the many *content warnings* within this series#If the idea of Bloodborne/eldenring and undertale having a little RPG maker baby sounds appealing to you - give it a shot#It's made by ONE GUY and it's a great horror game. I am just really bad at it.#My friends just enjoy putting me in situations where I scream and yell. We don't talk about the corn mazes. Or the other horror game nights#Apparently I'm funny when I'm Scared!#As people who follow me on twitter might know; I am deep in the pits of this series right now. I will be back with more art.
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also "textless" versions of these, wahooo
#corned beef#joe iconis christmas extravaganza#bsol#speaking of >:3 & >:3 third time's the >:3 in successfully slammed both up against the window of joe iconis's car (twitter @'d & Seen)#which is really just a :3 but whom among us (orchestra hit) is not a little impish with it#first year i did fanart like wouldn't it be fun if joe saw & liked this. second yr like Same plus it did happen last time#then also recency Fun Times bias sure but he did make it a frame in his End Of Year Good Times Celebration video like >:'3#yes i draw exactly what i wanna draw b/c it's some specific thing i enjoy that much so Yep that is the xmas show to me#so powerfully i was moved like ooh fun xmas villain wrole?? in '19 when i was paying attention & relieved of some bmc closure malaise#by the xmas show but obv Least aware / knowledgable lol. technically showed up in '18 around nov/dec but no chance Right then of tuning in#i mean i had the capacity but did not know it existed / even Less helpful preexisting context. anyway so by the time the show returns#& i've done research in between & gone my god i am i live laugh loving like Yeah i'll do more fanart & omg cyril & omg krampusfucking#able to ramp it up this year & like just thanks to Drawing Experience i'm better at forging ahead through thee process even when it's#extra ambitious like my god am i in over my head? well keep swimming for the surface like only several times going [aaa....] only to yknow#not be that tripped up anyway but still go [(celebrate) christmas!!! (with me)] & be like Do It For The Krampusfucking Gift#one post for another like lighting up my life joe just coming out like ''who wants clips. first up Full Cyril Fucks The Krampus number''#like jeez made that happen And passed it along....it's always the like epitome of my art like i make the specific often really niche stuff#i really respond to; does anyone else enjoy this? if yes; Wheeee; sometimes this is also ppl Behind the really niche shit i enjoy#like i truly hope you do get that kick out of it as i slam it up to the window; worth a Highlight Of Your Year or not#the power of [i do like to Draw the things i latch on to] + [internet] for you#really the bsol design even More an event in ''how did i even do this'' b/c even when planning to make it slightly easier like well#fewer figures; i'll use ink pen so i hone the lineart less than i would to precisely get [line weight mostly irrelevant] Line Geometry#yet still going ruh oh i'm honing for sure. but then like did Most of the lineart all in one night + all the coloring the next round#when i draw quite slowly / the Honing is virtually always an inextricable part of my process like i do Nothing in less than Hours#like i think even my freewheeling bsol sketches posted just this morning took me at Least an hour; judging by vids i played in the bg lol#not quite calibrated to have Attuned Confidence In My Ability To Forge Ahead thusly like oh no if i don't have Momentum or it doesn't#happen to be one of those times things just spontaneously come out great right off without more honing / consideration we're fucked....#not actually the case but yknow still realizing this lol But still able to just pat myself on the shoulder like It's Manageable & it is/was
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when his smile is so wide it takes up the entirety of his big stupid head . . . . . . . . . . <3
#( ooc . mun speaks . )#making icons & just. he’s cute. i want to squish him.#shake him around like a chew toy.#w/ that i’m probably going to be off for the night!#i haven’t felt great physically today & im feeling too tired to do much else tonight i think#but ty all again for always making my time on the dash so so lovely!
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there is not enough caffeine in the world to address how tired i am 🥴
#it's the 12 year anniversary of my father's death and i just couldn't sleep well :/#not to mention how fucking hot it was last night????#but yeah#the more time passes the more it kinda eats at me#it should be the other way around but my relationship with my dad was complicated and i'm still trying to process it#i used to post on fb about it every year but i can't handle the onslaught of his friends telling me what a great guy he was#and how well they all knew him and i never had that relationship with him#it's selfish but it hurts knowing i was like a stranger to him#i have so few photos with him and so few memories#most of them were on facebook which his ex wife didn't hesitate to delete the moment he died#also i hate thinking this way but he had a huge estate when he died like $500k or something like that with heaps of community donations#and from that i got... $1400...#it's pointless but sometimes i wonder if life wouldn't have been so hard if i had gotten some of that money :/#anyway despite all this i do love him and miss him#i can still remember the way his voice sounded when he would call out my name after not seeing me for a while#and he was the only one who would listen to me talk at length about steampunk and anime#when i did get to see him he would always try to share quirky things from his childhood with me#i miss him so much#i always thought i'd have a chance to connect with him when i was older but he died so suddenly the chance never came#the same with my brother#i wish i could talk to them one last time and tell them i love them
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finally watched happiest season and i totally understand why people hated the ending.
except for Jane. she deserves the world.
#like it’s not even about harper not being ready to come out#that’s totally her prerogative#but it doesn’t absolve her for how she treats people around her#first with riley holy fuck - and it’s implied she never even apologised to her in the years after???#with that ‘understanding’ they have towards the end#riley would have been completely within her rights to not accept that menial discussion as water under the bridge#but anyway the way harper also treats abby is downright cruel at times#the bit that got me the most was her gaslighting abby the morning after she was out all night#poor girl was just trying to make sure she wasn’t awfully hungover and gets accused of smothering her??? tf???#i really wanted harper to have something to redeem her but she just didn’t#a great moment for her would have been that chat outside the bar with her ex boyfriend#like she didn’t have to out herself entirely but she could have at least said something#she doesn’t make a single effort until it’s way too late and she got outed (like okay fair that was a horrible thing to happen to her)#but honestly i think abby should have still walked away after it#like ‘i’m happy you can be your true self now but for us it’s over’#abby definitely had far more chemistry with riley (stereotype yayaya idc)#but i don’t think they should have gotten together at the end necessarily#maybe just them deciding to keep in touch or something and THEN it happens later#like in that year forward or something - riley and abby are together and they run into harper who’s happy and moved on idk#ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT JANE#girlypop finally got her moment and i’m so glad they didn’t make out her book was awful just cause she was writing it for ten years#like we saw how good that painting was??#when girly puts her heart in something she’s all in#cause nobody was all in on her AND SHE DESERVES THE WORLD#honestly one of the few good characters and i’m glad she at least got a good ending#also also why you gonna cast aubrey plaza and barely give her any screen time#like pls make it make sense#haven’t gone off like that in tags for a hot minute™️#happiest season
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