#jk he's there for that dick
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LET HIM DRIVEEEEEE
#jk he's a baby pls don't put him behind the wheel#dc comics#dick grayson#batman#robin#nightwing#bruce wayne#batman one bad day mr. freeze#in honor of the east coast's unannounced blizzard
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Pre-teen Tim Drake as a hidden spectator to 80s New Teen Titans is so funny to me. That Dick Grayson-obsessed kid would absolutely be following all their exploits which makes it so much more amusing that their media presence is basically:
“Interview with model Starfire and Titans leader Nightwing!”
“Starfire kills a man.”
“Starfire is found innocent and declares her love for Nightwing on live TV!”
“Wonder Girl claims The Church of Brother Blood is evil and we’re all being brainwashed.”
“Nightwing invites you to join the Church of Brother Blood!”
Who needs to follow Batman when your entertainment during boarding school can be whatever the hell is going on in Titans Tower.
#if 11-12 year old Tim saw Nightwing earnestly telling him to join the church of brother blood. would he do it? JK…unless#new teen titans#dick grayson#tim drake#ntt#koriand’r#heroesriseandfall#funny business
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I'm not sure if you're still taking Ghostlights requests, but if you are: Dick asking Duke to take Haley to the dog park for him in order to set up a meet-cute for him with the guy with the weird green rottweiler
And if you aren't, just know that you're doing great and I appreciate the hell out of you
“Oh, shoot!”
Hearing Dick rush around as a frantic mess is not uncommon while he’s in Gotham. There’s too many people wanting to spend time with him that he ends up pulled in a bunch of different directions. Dick’s always in a rush, always busy, always making time for people because he has more love than Duke has ever seen in a person.
Dick’s also got pretty good time management skills after years of doing this. He’s only cutting out a few minutes early for their designated three hour catch-up session.
That doesn’t mean he’s going to do it gracefully, though.
“Almost lost track of the time!” he says, moving to the couch to pick up his jacket. “Hey, Duke, can do you me a favor while I’m out?”
“Sure, what is it?”
“Can you take Haley to the dog park? I usually take her twice a week around this time, but I totally forgot to include that in my calendar this week so I’ve got plans with the Titans just outside the city, and no time to take her out.”
“Yeah, man, of course I can take her to the dog park. The one attached to Robinson Park, right?”
Dick nods, shoving his shoes onto his feet. “That’s the one! Her treats are also in the bag hanging next to her leash. Oh, and she has a friend at the dog park! Don’t be scared when you see him, he’s just green.”
“Oh…kay?”
“Great, thanks! Bye, Duke, I’ll see you later!”
And with that, Dick is gone, closing the door to his safehouse as he dashes into the hall.
Duke is left alone in Dick’s Gotham safehouse, blinking dazedly at the empty space where he once was. He’s certainly a whirlwind of activity when he realizes he’s going to be late. He’s also skilled in just saying things and leaving before any questions can be answered.
Haly jumps up onto the couch next to Duke. They share a look, then Duke shakes his head. “You have to deal with that every day, huh?”
Haly, the good girl that she is, doesn’t say anything bad against her owner and just puts a paw on Duke’s thigh, her tail wagging.
“I hear ya, girl. Let’s go to the dog park to meet your green friend, I guess.”
He has no idea what that means, honestly. Is Dick just talking about a dog that got its fur dyed green? Or is Haly’s friend like… a mutant dog?
Well, he’s not going to find out by stalling.
Duke pets Haly, then stands up and walks to the door. Her head perks up as soon as she hears the jangle of her leash being moved, and then she’s running to the door, looking up at him expectantly. Smiling, Duke slips the harness onto her, then attached it to the leash. He gives her another quick pet before shoving on his shoes and grabbing her bag of treats and waste disposal bags.
He double checks that he has his phone, then takes hold of Dick’s spare safehouse key and steps out into the hallway with Haly. She waits patiently as he locks the door, checks that the lock holds, then runs down the hallway, ripping the leash right out of his hands.
“Haly! Wait! Stop, girl!”
She happily ignores him and goes straight for the elevator, leaving him to run after her and quickly scoop up the leash as soon as he’s close enough.
“Of course you’re a little escape artists,” he says to her, “Just like your owner.”
Haly woofs softly, then stands up and scratches at the doors of the elevator. Shaking his head, amused, Duke pushes the button to call the elevator and wonders if Dick has to deal with this every time they go to the dog park.
On one hand, it wouldn’t surprise him since Dick is absolutely the kind of guy to give in to his dog’s every whims and spoil her rotten. On the other hand, Duke fully believes that Haly is smart enough and cute enough to misbehave only when Dick isn’t around so he never believes people when they try to tell him about all the mischief she’s caused.
Dogs and their owners really do reflect one another. The internet was right about that.
Duke makes sure to keep a tight grip on Haly’s leash once they leave the apartment building. The streets are busy, as they tend to be on weekends, and the sight of Haly straining against her leash, ready to run, brings a smile to more than one face.
He plots the route to the dog park in his mind, then starts up a light jog, tugging lightly on the leash to prompt Haly to follow him.
It’s nice to run just for the sake of it. Haly makes a good running partner as well.
How long has it been since Duke had time to relax and not be prepared for the worst? All the running he usually does these days is to catch up with criminals or run for his life. Being out during the day, moving through the city, without any lives in danger? Genuinely nice and relaxing.
Maybe he can offer to take Haly to the dog park from now on. Join Dick whenever he goes. Create a set few hours where he doesn’t do anything but enjoy being outside in one of the few places where the smog of pollution and chemical toxins isn’t so thick in the air.
He’ll just have to make sure Dick doesn’t agree to something else during those days. It’s still strange to think that Dick could forget to do something involving Haly when he’s such a good dog owner and a pro at juggling various responsibilities and a busy schedule.
Well, they all have off days. This must be one of Dick’s.
The sidewalks get wider once they reach the street that leads to the park. Families fill up the space, walking with strollers in front of them or lined up at a food cart. The vivid green of spring fills the grassy fields that lead to the large patches of trees, marking the edge of Poison Ivy’s territory. Clovers decorate the ground, bees moving from flower to flower.
There are other dogs on walks as well, making circuits around the park or running after toys. Duke spots a cat in a walking harness as well and wonders if he can convince Damian to get one for Alfred the cat.
The dog park is on the other end of the park, as far away from Ivy’s territory as possible. The fenced off areas are separated into big dogs and small dogs, with a helpful guide as to which dogs go where posted at the entrance.
Duke slows to a walk, breathing deeply to help settle his heart rate back down to something normal. Haly walks by his side, tail wagging, as she watches the other dogs run back and forth behind the fence.
She’s still small, just growing out of puppy size, so Duke leads her into the small dog area, carefully making sure the gate doesn’t open enough for any quick dogs to make a break for it. He walks over to a bench and sits down before undoing the harness on her, setting her loose.
Haly licks his hand once, then darts away, barking lightly as she joins the other dogs tumbling around each other.
Amused, Duke leans back at watches as the other dogs sniff her, then do their funny little bowing stomps, moving back and forth before running off so she can give chase.
He figures staying for an hour will be good enough. That should get the most of her energy out, and then they can make the long trek back to Dick’s safehouse so he can pick her up before he heads back to Bludhaven. Pulling out his phone, Duke settles in to wait, keeping half his attention on Haly just in case any of the other dogs decide to get a little too rough.
The first twenty minutes pass peacefully. Haly runs around and the owners of the other dogs give her pets when she runs up to them. One even went over to Duke to offer him a pack of fruit gummies.
Then a loud bark fills the air and Duke jerks upright, watching with wide eyes as a colossally large dog, green and glowing and slightly transparent, comes barrelling down the street, headed right towards them.
He doesn’t have time to yell Haly’s name before the dog is in the fence. None of the other dog owners look alarmed, though, so he watches carefully, prepared to jump up and save Haly at a moment’s notice.
“Cujo!” someone yells from down the street. A guy with dark hair comes running up and smoothly jumps over the fence. “Cujo, how many times do I have to tell you not to run off like that?”
The green dog, apparently Cujo, barks happily.
“And you’re too big for this park right now, buddy. Shrink, boy. It’s time to be small.”
And then Cujo… obeys? The dog shrinks, and instead of being the size of a bus, it’s now small enough to be carried in someone’s arms.
Green dog is not enough warning for all of that. Dick owes him so much for this.
Actually, he’s kind of shocked that Dick never mentioned this to anyone. Surely a giant green dog would get people’s attention. Why is this the first time he’s heard about it?
“You new around here?” someone asks, and Duke turns to see the person who gave him the fruit gummies.
“Kinda? It’s my first time coming to the dog park. I’m looking after Haly, that one right over there.” He points out Haly, who is running in circles around Cujo.
“Ah, I see. Dick mentioned someone new would be coming today.”
Duke narrows his eyes. He’s starting to get the feeling that he’s been set up for something, but he’s not sure what.
“I’ll give you the spiel we tell all newcomers, in that case,” they continue. “Cujo is a ghost dog. Poor thing died during some animal testing, far as we know. Danny looks after him, since Cujo got attached to the kid years ago before he moved to Gotham. He’s a kind one, but very nervous, and we’ve all got an agreement to keep quiet about him and Cujo round this parts. You better be holding your tongue, as well, ya hear me?”
“Sure thing,” Duke nods. “My lips are sealed.”
He’ll just ask Dick about the ghost dog situation and do his own investigation if needed. But Cujo is just a dog, and his owner is just a guy. Nothing threatening, nothing requiring a Bat’s attention.
“Good,” they nod. “I’ll get out of your hair now.” They’re gone before Duke can reply, adjusting the hat on their head as they head back to their group in the back left corner of the dog park.
Satisfied that things are under control, Duke relaxes back into the bench, watching Haly and Cujo tumble around with the other dogs, barking happily. Haly’s still growing into her paws, so she trips and falls often, but gets up without a moments pause, ready to keep playing.
From the corner of his eyes, Duke catches sight of someone walking towards him.
He looks over and finds Cujo’s owner—Danny, wasn’t it?—approaching. Their eyes meet, and Danny offers him a sheepish smile and a wave. His eyes are a dark blue that seem to glow with some otherworldly light, and Duke can swear he sees something shifting around him, as if the air has turned visible and twists around his body like wisps of smoke.
“Mind if I sit with you?” Danny asks, and Duke moves to the side a bit.
“Go ahead,” he says.
“You’re Duke, right? Dick told me about you last week.”
It’s looking more and more like Dick is up to something, and Duke will need to get his revenge. “Did he? All good things, I hope.”
“Aha, yeah, all good things. Um, actually I think I should apologize? I maybe said you sounded like my type so Dick promised that he’d get you here somehow. Sorry if this is messing up your plans for the day.”
Oh. Oh!
Well. That’s interesting.
Duke quietly shelves his plans for revenge against Dick and takes a proper look at Danny. He’s shy, but with a bright smile, glowing eyes and strange smoke curling around him still, and messy black hair windswept from chasing after Cujo. There’s a flush in his cheeks and his long fingers fiddle with the string of his dark red hoodie.
“Don’t worry, I didn’t have any plans today. This is way better than just sleeping all day.”
“Well, I don’t know about that,” Danny laughs, “There’s nothing I like more than being able to sleep all day. That would fix me for sure.”
There’s a loud bark, and Danny’s eyes snap back to Cujo, who is growing bigger. “Cujo!” Danny yells, voice sharp. “Shrink down, or we go home.”
Cujo grumbles, whines, then goes back to being little. The green dog only has a moment to look sad before Haly is tackling him, sending them back into another chase around the park.
“Sorry about that,” Danny says, slouching against the bench.
“It’s all good,” Duke replies. “So. I’m your type, huh?”
Danny’s cheeks turn a deep, charming red. He looks away, then nods and ducks his head down.
“And that hasn’t changed after meeting me?”
Danny shakes his head, then peeks over at Duke, gaze slowly moving up his body until he meets Duke’s eyes. “Definitely hasn’t changed,” he says.
Now it’s Duke’s turn to feel his cheeks burn, flustered and pleasantly surprised by Danny’s boldness. It doesn’t help that Danny is cute, someone he can see himself falling for.
“Good,” he says, then knocks his knee against Danny’s. “I wouldn’t mind getting to know you more. On one condition.”
“Oh? And what would that be?”
“Tell me what Dick told you about me. I wanna make sure he wasn’t sharing an embarrassing stories about me. If I’m gonna make a fool of myself, then I’ll do it myself with no outside help.”
Danny’s laugh is bright and warm and sends butterflies dancing in Duke’s stomach. “Fair enough!” he says. “And you know what? I’ll trade you for embarrassing stories. Trust me, I have so many. Nothing you’ve done can be worse that the dumb shit I do on a regular basis.”
“Woah, woah, woah, confident, aren’t we? Don’t say that until you’ve heard about some of the stupid situation I choose to throw myself into.”
“Please, I’m an younger brother. If anyone knows how to be stupid, it’s me.”
“I’m part of the disaster that is the Wayne family. I think that has you beat.”
“My parents are mad scientists and my dog is a ghost. Try again.” The teasing smile on Danny’s lips makes him want to be reckless, to keep pushing, to go down this path as far as he can. Duke can’t remember the last time he clicked with someone so instantly, to be so comfortable with them so soon.
Damn. He’s gonna have to thank Dick for this, isn’t he?
As if on cue, his phone buzzes in his pocket. Duke pulls it out with an apologetic smile to Danny, who leans back a bit to give him some privacy.
The text that pops up is from Dick. It’s a photo of him and Danny from the side, heads bent close together as they talk with bright smiles. He can just make out the wild red curls of Kori’s hair.
“I’m gonna put jello in his socks,” Duke says cheerfully, already looking around to find where Dick is hiding.
He probably already moved locations, the ass.
“What’s up?”
He holds out his phone so Danny can see the screen. Danny stares at it, then looks around, then stares at the screen again.
“...Is he watching us?”
“Yep.”
“...Should we do something about it?”
Duke shrugs. “I mean, I’m up for hunting him down and tackling him if you are.”
“I can do you one better,” Danny says with a sharp grin. He whistles, and Cujo comes running over, Haly at his heels, and he skids to a stop to sit before Danny. “Cujo. You remember Dick?” Cujo barks, as if answering. “Fetch! Go fetch Dick!”
Cujo jumps to his feet, grows from the size of a pug to a bear, and takes off for the art instillation farther into Robinson Park. Moments later, they hear a yell followed by loud laughter, and Cujo and running back, Dick hanging from his mouth, with Kori, Donna, and Roy following after him at a leisurely stroll.
“I think we’re gonna get along great,” Duke says. “He’s gonna wish he never set us up.”
“That’s the way to do it,” Danny agrees.
“Say, wanna grab lunch together tomorrow?”
Danny blinks, then blushes again. “What, like a date?”
“Yeah, as a date. You up for it?”
“How could I say no? I was promised embarrassing stories.”
He watches as Cujo drops a rumpled looking Dick to the ground, half his shirt soaked with saliva. He dramatically mimes being shot in the heart when he sees them both looking at him, and goes limp when Kori picks him up and tries to set him on his feet.
Then he tries to act very calm and cool as Danny leans against him. “Think he’s gonna follow up on our date?” Danny asks in a low voice.
Duke closes his eyes and tries not to despair. He didn’t even think of that. “Worse. He’s going to tell everyone else, then we’ll have every available Wayne kid stalking us on our date.”
“Guess I’ll have to rely on you to chase them off, huh?”
“Or we can sic Cujo on them again.”
“Or that,” Danny nods. “It’s always effective.”
He’s really going to have to bring his best to the date tomorrow, just to stay a step ahead of everyone else. Maybe he’ll ask Barbara for a favor and get her to lead them off? And if Bruce gets involved, then Duke is fully prepared to flashbang him, grab Danny, and run.
It’s going to be a disaster.
It’s going to be fun.
He’s already looking forward to it, and from the mischievous smile on Danny’s face, he’s not the only one.
#ghostlights#dc x dp#dp x dc#dcxdp#dpxdc#prompt fill#my writing#dick is so great i love him sooo much. most amazing loser guy ever <3#him befriending danny at the park bc hes investigating the guy with the green superpowered dog thats making everyone nervous#only to find that danny's a sweet kid whos stressed out and doing his best and cujo is a ghost dog who died years ago and only wants to pla#really tugs at his heartstrings and dick from then on is one of dannys closest friends#the other dog park regulars slowly get used to danny and start talking to him too after dick does and also grow super protective#dannys got a whole squad ready to protect him if duke doesnt treat him right lol#waynes vs dog park regulars: FIGHT#jk they just give very mild shovel talks that are mostly 'treat him right hes had a rough life and deserves love and happiness. or else'#thanks for the prompt!!
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Before the Robining
Alfred: …
Bruce: … [typing on the bat computer]
Alfred: it is awfully quiet isn’t it?
Bruce: [Stops typing] …yeah
Years later
Dick: I bet you can’t climb to the top of the dinosaur before I can!
Damian: tt! I am above such childish bets.
Stephanie: Sounds like excuses to me lil’ man!
Jason: c’mon Steph, nobody expects a six month old to be able to climb anything. Don’t goad him into it he’ll just hurt himself.
Damian: I am also above being manipulated by facetious reverse psychology!
Duke: you’re currently walking towards the dinosaur dude.
Damian: AM NOT!
Dick: No cheating, no grappling! 3! 2! 1! Go!
Cass in two seconds: I win 😊 🎉
*various sounds of exasperation, questions about the source of the party popper and sore losing*
Tim: Maybe I should sleep because I swear I’m seeing Cass on the t-Rex and Dick covered in confetti. Oh wait no that’s normal never mind.
Alfred: This is not at all what I meant Bruce.
#jk Alfred loves his grand babies#he just needs some peace and quiet sometimes#he was trying to hint to Bruce that they could talk about something other that Batman stuff#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#damian wayne#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#tim drake#The fact that it is a normal occurrence tho#incorrect batfamily quotes
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HP fans: Snape was Neville's worst teacher
Me: Yeah the strict teacher was way worse than the guy who helped torture his parents to insanity and showed him what he did to his parents or the teachers who literally tortured him and drove him into hiding while at Hogwarts out of fear that they would kill him. Snape's treatment of Neville was way worse than anything Barty Crouch Jr. or the Carrow twins did.
#pro snape#i guess#neville longbottom#barty crouch jr#amycus carrow#alecto carrow#severus snape#harry potter#hp#jk rowling#jkr#snape was a dick#but he was not nearly as awful as yall make him out to be#the carrow twins
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What is with Opportunist and getting the saddest princess we feel the most sympathy for and continuously fucking it up by being horrible?
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I’m sorry but I’m a bottom Inho truther…….
#just hear me out#actually I have no good explanation than I just want to him to get railed#some dick would fix him#jk#plus he’s such a brat like come on#squid game#squid game 2#hwang inho#seong gihun#inhun#ginho
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Source - Muto20002 (Nude alt in link)
(Artist's FurAffinity and Itaku)
#gay furry#gay furry pecs#gay furry bulge#gay furry pokemon#gay furry sableye#artists twitter above#we love a big dick twink around here! hes got a dick i can play with for hours like a cat toy!#the chest hair is also speaking to me in unspeakable way jk they are telling me to suck him off
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In this month’s feature of guess Jason Todd’s age !!
He’s a cutie here tho HUHUH (eat more bb)
AHHHHH Damian in this art style is so cute tho !
Look at them three being domestic !! Big brother Duke slay !!!!!
And then here is our babies burning in front of Bruce and traumatizing him more
#is DC finally seeing the impact of the webtoon version#to be fair he should have seen it coming since none of them are bickering#maybe they’ll change the canon events of this timeline jk i doubt it#batfamily#jason todd#redhood#bat boys#dc universe#bruce wayne#batman#dick grayson#nightwing#spoiler#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#orphan#batgirl#oracle#barbara gordon#duke thomas#signal#dc comics#dc community#damian wayne#robin#tim drake#red robin
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lukewarm take but reading fantasy and fiction books about a kid (10-13) growing up (15-18) and then being treated like an adult has totally screwed with me
no shade to harry potter (with regards to age and maturity ; we could go in circles about jkr) or harry potter but that was NOT how 16 year old act and it took me so long to get that.
16 year olds are like really stupid adults except in some things where they’re really clever. but being hunted by monsters and magical nazis during your childhood doesn’t give you wisdom it gives you nightmares and swordfighting prowess.
forget the gods treating percy jackson like a man when he came to olympus that last time. i look back at historical rulers when they were 20 and km like “holy moly that’s a child get them off the throne wtf” and perhaps it shouldn’t have been so instilled in me that the growth you experience in your preteen years is gonna matter more than the growth of your young adult years
idk this is a lukewarm take
#fiction#percy jackson#annabeth chase#olympus#harry potter#jk rowling#hermione granger#ron weasley#the marauders#that fandom is actually so good at making teens feel like teens#like OMG YES#SIRIUS IS A MORON BC HES SIXTEEN#does tha make him wrong#no#but hey he is dumb#james potter#sirius black#batman#jason todd#damian wayne#dick grayson
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If a genie told me I had three wishes, I would use them all to end the discussion of “who’s the best Robin!” “Who’s Batman’s favorite child!” “Which Robin is the strongest!” “Which Robin is the best detective!” “Which Robin would be the best Batman!” Because… I think the concept of Robin flew over all of your heads…
#robin is NOT supposed to be Batman#he/she is supposed to be a child…. like wdym Damian would beat all the robins?? he’s a child who’s learning to fit into society??#why is he fighting a bunch of children now#also this arguement is a joke#it literally leads to nowhere because I could disguise myself as an old white man#sneak into dc hq and write a Robin story with my oc and make them be Batman’s favorite most op Robin most smartest Robin and it would be#canon#aka Tim’s writers… heh… jk….#anyways it’s dumb how about instead we talk about Duke and Steph being the best robins because they followed Dicks Robin the closest#jason todd#batman#dc#dc comics#dick grayson#batfam#bruce wayne#damian wayne#dc robin#robin dc#stephanie brown#duke thomas#tim drake
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how would constantine react to some random girl flirting with him while he is in a relationship 🫢
girl he hardly pays attention to you let alone to someone else.
but on a serious note, he would ignore that girl to the max. he would continue taking drags from his cigarette and just zoning out lmao, definitely thinking about some demonic case and how to solve it.
and if he can’t ignore because it’s like idk someone he needs to be having a convo for one or another reason, granted he would roll his eyes and be so dry and passive-aggressively mean whenever she makes a flirty comment. he would also jerk away if she tries to touch him!!
#he might be a dick but he is a dick to everyone not just you#jk jk he is loyal#a loyal dick#john constantine x you#john constantine imagine#constantine 2005#john constantine drabble#feinv—jc
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i just saw porn of Reigen with a big dick and op, how does it feel to be a LIAR
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i dunno if its just me, but jk fandom kinda have less crack fics than i expected.
like, yeah, i love fluff, and those intense angsty after-war fics. but damn, crack fics are food for my soul lol
#i once read a very old jk doujin where armin+ eren ventured outside the wall after they eliminate the titans#and jean decided to propose to mikasa right after#kinda expecting to be rejected#but mikasa agreed#but she said jean gonna be her bride#and everyone were liekk ??? wadyoumean?? do you know how marriage work???#but jean is obviously ecstatic + confused a bit why he's the bride?? when he's the one with the dick here#when they explain it to mikasa#mikasa wrote a letter to eremin to search for some meds outside the wall that can make her grow some dick#eremin reading the letter with surprised pikachu face#i cudnt stop laughingggg#we need this kinda crackkkk#also this is the birth of my top!mikasa bottom! jean kink#dont fight.me.on.thissss#jeankasa#au ideas
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proud to be following a fellow Snape fan🤝
Thanks! Snape is a flawed, complex character. He's like House in that he may deride you at every opportunity, but will move mountains to save your life. It's outright stated that when he can do so without blowing his cover, he saves people. He is a story of how certain groups can be indoctrinated and a story of redemption.
#he may be a dick#but he is ultimately a good person#severus snape#pro snape#pro severus snape#harry potter#hp#jk rowling#jkr
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The titans fight a hoard of villains (titans #40)
#titans#dc#dick grayson#argent#Donna Troy#roy Harper#nightwing#nightwing comics#leader dick#Garth#one might think dick is scolding Roy for joking around but I#an intellectual#know he tells Roy to can it as a play on Roy’s sale joke#jk 💕#unless…?#Jesse chambers
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