#jessie biggs and wedge

[tossawary]

The AVALANCHE group in "Final Fantasy 7: Remake" keeps cracking me up. They're not wearing any face masks to hide their identities when busting into secure SHINRA facilities full of surveillance cameras??? They don't even change outfits when they're not running missions??? It's killing me.

Assuming that they are not outright killing every SHINRA trooper they encounter (maybe they are, idk), even if they weren't being caught on a bunch of surveillance cameras (the opening mission shows this happening), there's like dozens of people who should be able to give relatively detailed descriptions of them??? (Also, I laugh every time the screen says that Cloud has "defeated" a SHINRA trooper. If he's a super soldier swinging that much sharp metal around at high speeds, he should (realistically) be cutting people in half. It is amusing to me to see the people enemies just fall over and the machine enemies get trashed. I find it very cartoony.)

(I am still failing to properly watch my way through this series during work. I personally don't super love the hyperrealistic dolls design style and I don't think it jives all that well with the incredibly cartoony world building, clumsy "as you know" exposition, and wacky gameplay execution so far. It's just not my thing. Yet I found "Ace Attorney" utterly intolerable to watch but very fun to actually play through the wackiness, so I'll give FF7 the benefit of the doubt there and say, "Sure, I assume this is still really fun to actually play and that the world is immersive enough that way.")

This game is a "AAA" remake of a super popular game in a super popular franchise, but they apparently couldn't be bothered to make secondary "civilian" models for Jessie, Biggs, and Wedge? What is this? A cheaply made cartoon series? These characters are waltzing around the slums in their matching bright red bandanas and Jessie, who is apparently a former performer and therefore especially recognizable, is always wearing her silly tit-sculpted armor. AVALANCHE took a crowded passenger train home from their opening terrorist mission when they should rightfully all smell and look awfully beat-up and suspicious after fleeing a massive reactor explosion???

Like, I don't really care if the characters think they're hacking the camera systems here or if the game wants pretty character faces to be visible at all times. I also don't really care about faithfulness to the original setup. They could yank facemasks down during specific cutscenes? Cloud could lose his facemask at a dramatic moment during a cutscene? And Jessie could exclaim over how cute Cloud is at the end of the mission or whatever; you can frame all of their faces as a rewarding reveal at the end of the opener. I know that character models removing clothing is super hard in 3D animation, especially games, but there are storyboarding and model swap tricks for that. You can fake ripping off a facemask relatively easily.

If the point is for SHINRA to know it's them all along and to set them up to take the fall for something later, then AVALANCHE taking greater precautions and the Turks catching them out anyway could be used to make both AVALANCHE and the Turks look more competent / dangerous. Maybe you could generously interpret SHINRA's apparent failure to catch our protagonists out as the corporation being a bloated wreck of greed and incompetent, overly reliant on their technology and wealth, but that still doesn't really excuse for me making the AVALANCHE characters look this reckless. Jessie later visits her SHINRA employees PARENTS' HOUSE in her TERRORIST UNIFORM??? JESSIE, NO!!! That's so dangerous.

There's so much detail in the backgrounds here already! If it's a matter of resources, surely some random mob NPC models could be cut so that I could see Jessie, Biggs, and Wedge in cute civilian wear outside of their missions! I am already suspending so much disbelief for so much of FF7's wacky worldbuilding, but these little details are what's really tripping me up for some reason, like, come on. SHOW ME that these characters are good at what they do by having them take some basic precautions.

I laughingly shared these thoughts with someone and they said (jokingly critical of the game as well) that Barret probably doesn't bother with secrecy because he's already apparently the only big black guy around and almost certainly the only big black guy with a gun for an arm. Which is a point! But also, BARRET!!! YOU'RE A FATHER!!! SUNGLASSES ARE NOT SUFFICIENT ANONYMITY HERE!!! THINK OF MARLENE, MAN!!!

[st4rcz4r]

Some band au design doodles because my brain won’t shut up about them rn,,,

Plus some “not in the bands but are still in the au because I said so.” designs as well

[ruuari]

I love... FFVIIR ✨ (print)

[rocketbirdie]

The Rebirth B-Team that we deserved...

[vickdoom]

had to color swatch Zack for that last post and ended up with all these 🤦.

[acquired-stardust]

Final Fantasy VII Playstation 1997

[mitsame]

new super ff7 college au 2024 edition

[pine-needle-shuffle]

Have I mentioned I love them? 'Cause I love them very much

[risingoflights]

working seriously on book number 2 now and thinking, looking at the left page wips vs the right page selfie which is a few years old, that maybe i finally understand the whole 'colour is relative' thing a bit better.

[berabare]

Another gang!!!

[little-black-dress-zack-fair]

Jessie: *calling Barret* Hey our favourite leader!

Barret: Jail or hospital?

Wedge: How could you make such accusations when we are merely trying to greet our favourite leader?!

Barret: Jail or hospital?

Biggs: Do you really have such little faith in us?

Barret: Jail. Or. Hospital

Jessie: ...jail. AND WE LOVE YOU!

Barret: *hangs up*

[darlingzelda]

[zoruathemageknight]

lmao I beat Stormblood

[pusssyenihilater]

Texts between me and my friends that I’ve turned into FF7 shit posts PART 2

[rocketbirdie]

I walk into Seventh Heaven. I take a step towards the bar, my usual and preferred seats. I see two new guys dressed like SOLDIERS, with big ass swords. I pause. I see they are chained together by the neck. I take one step back. I lock eyes with the blonde one who pauses playing with the black haired one's hand. Claws are now visible on said hand. I immediately turn around and leave.

OBSESSED with this one. thank you anon for my life

[final-smashey]

Jen Bartel