#jesse you sick son of a bitch

[abouttoplaymy-ace]

EXCUSE ME. WHERE ARE THE SUCCESSION GIRLIES TONIGHT. I NEED TO TALK TO YALL!!!

[alien-girl-21]

Since I won't see my friends until next year, I thought it would be a perfect time to do this again

Joker out and käärijä as random shit my friends say!!

(+ sneaky joost in one entry)

Under the cut because it's LONG

Kris: I actually miss Bojan, i'm going to tell him to come back from New York... but don't tell him I said that, it might get to his head that I actually like him

-

Bojan: writes on the board

Jan: is that arabic?

-

-Bojan's first time taking money out of the atm-

Bojan: what do I do now?

The screen of the atm: please select the language of your transaction

Martin: choose Slovenian, idiot

-

-at the airport-

Bojan: I'm going to get a pamphlet real quick

Jan: sure, I'll wait here

Bojan, coming back empty handed: I think I fell in love

-

Kris: in bojan's defense —not to defend him— but in his defense

-

Nace: hey, you wanna share this cookie?

Jan: sure

Nace: it doesn't break though, I already ate my half

Jan: you're an idiot, of course it can break, here, see? I broke it

Bojan: I ship you guys

-

Jan: -breaks a chair-

Jan: fuck, let me fix it -breaks the chair even more-

Jure: try to put the thing in that hole

Jan: -fixes the chair- Bob the builder 😎

-

(In the gc)

Jere: you want go party?

Bojan: I can't

Bojan: i'm sick and don't want to get worse

Kris: if Bojan isn't going, I'm not going

Jure: no fucking way 🤣

Bojan: I had to read that twice

Bojan: I was about to call him a bitch

-

Allu: if someone was killed while we were together, I think that Jesse, Jukka, and Jere would be the most level headed one's

Jesse: I think that Jere would be the one in charge to calm us

Jere: I would be making jokes like "at least we're better than that guy" and pointing at tommi's dead body

-

Jure: might go to this -shows a flyer for a singles only cruise-

Nace: only 99 euros? That's cheap... when is it?

Bojan: aren't you taken?

Nace: Oh fuck, I am

Bojan: apologize now

Nace, taking his phone out: I'm so sorry, babe

-

-during esc-

Bojan: okay, we're next, we can do this

Nace: -starts doing push ups for some fucking reason-

-

Jere: i go on stage now

Bojan: NOOO— i mean, YESSS

Jere: ?

Bojan: i'm just used to you leaving me alone :(

-

Jure and bojan: playfighting

Jure: now it's your turn, jan!

Bojan: jan wouldn't do that to me because he respects me 😌

Jan, getting ready to slap bojan:

-

(In spanish because there is no way to translate this dad joke)

Bojan: antes de que se me olvide, les quería contar un chiste: donde nacen las computadoras?

Jure: no sé

Bojan: en el mar

Nace: por qué?

Jan: porque navegan

Bojan: porque son peces

Kris: miren a los tremendos payasos que nos cargamos en esta banda

Bojan: 🥰

-

Host: for this, we're going to need groups of 6

Joker out: does a group hug

Bojan, tapping jere's arm: jere, jere

Jere: what?

Bojan: join us

Jere: really? Me? 🥰

Bojan: yes, you, you're part of the group 🥰

Kris: can you two stop?

-

Kris: do you have a pen?

Bojan, handing him a rainbow pen: yeah

Kris: gay pen

Bojan: at least it works

Kris: faggot

Bojan: I am! You have a problem with that?

Kris: I was talking to the pen! Not you!

-

Interviewer: Who would survive the longest in a deserted island?

Everyone: Jure

Bojan: I could survive, I think

Kris: I think that a coconut would fall on your head and you would die

-

Jesse: if a girl asked to peg you, what would you say?

Häärijä: no

Jere: skill issue

-

While watching a football game, in the gc:

Jan: well, i'm going to wait for the game to start while eating my cereal

Bojan: now I want some

Jan: the small box costs 2 euros in the supermarket

Bojan: you know what? I'm going to the supermarket now, i'm going to spend money because of you

Jan, sending a pic of the cereal box: here it is for reference 👍🏻

-

Bojan, after turning the washing machine on and somehow there was a power outage in the whole floor at the same time: ☹

Martin: hey, don't worry, it wasn't your fault, bojč

The electrician, a couple of days later: yeah, so, the outage was caused because someone used too much electricity in this apartment while someone was showering in the unit next to this one

Martin: so it was your fucking fault

-

Jan: I photoshopped us into some world cup images

Nace: it looks like Messi is kissing you, Bojan

Bojan: yeah

Jure: that's your dream right? Messi kissing you?

Bojan: yeah 🥰

-

Someone: yeah, so I spoke with the director, and he asked me if I spoke dutch and I said yeah

Jure: can you speak duch to us?

Someone, in dutch: I can, but what can I say? I just learned it to learn it, not because I liked it

Jan: okay, okay, Kris, it's your turn, reply in Dutch!

Jure: like we practiced

Bojan: literally jumping up and down like an excited puppy

-

Kris: this is bullshit, stupid fucking coordinators, they have shit in the fucking head instead of a stupid brain!

Jan: said the princess

-

-while playing volleyball-

Jure: just imagine the ball is your ex!

Bojan, cradling the ball in his arms: i'm so sorry, it was all my fault, I miss you everyday

Jan: great job, idiot

-

Nace: you look really good today, Bojan

Kris: yeah, your outfit is really well color coordinated

Bojan: thank you, krisko

Nace: and what about me?

Bojan: it's because Kris only bullies me, so a compliment from him matters more

-

Jure: idk if I'll be able to go out this Saturday, my parents are starting to make milk, and because of that I need to close their shop that night

Kris: making milk?

Jure: soy milk, yeah

Kris: Oh, I was about to ask since when did your parents have cows

Nace: moo

Jan: moo

^ they proceed to moo at each other for the next five minutes while the conversation carries on

-

Jere, just minding his business:

Häärijä, handing him a paper crown: you are now the queen of this realm

Jere: ❓

Häärijä: you will be the queen until we vote on who will be coronated next

Jere: thanks?

Häärijä: my pleasure, your majesty

-

Kris: I actually didn't call any of my exes while I was drunk last night, that's a great achievement!

-

Jere: hey guys, sorry if you hear me swearing, i'm playing a videogame..... FUCKING BULLSHIT

-

Jesse, after jere got the piña colada tattoo: hey can I see your prision tattoo?

-

Nace: remember to participate in the meeting

Bojan: i'm watching football

Nace: they're asking you a question bojč

Bojan: GOAAALLL!!!!!

-

Bojere, sitting chest to back in a bench:

Jan:

Bojan: Oh Jan, sorry that we're facing away from you

Jere: you want to hug me too? Join train?

Jan: yeah sure, let me just—

Jere: no! Don't touch me!

-

Kris: I would like to go back in time to meet Jesus and smoke weed with him

-

Käärijä: so, I'm walking to get to work, and I see a line of police cars and I'm thinking "I fucking hope that they don't want to do spontaneous searching because my bag is 90% weed, 10% my actual stuff"

-

Someone: yeah, this is my daughter, she's 4 and learning how to play drums

Bojan: that's your daughter? Oh my gosh 🥺

Kris: Bojan, you have a severe case of baby fever

-

Jere: where are the bathrooms?

Jukka, craning jere's head up to see the giant "TOILET" sign above them: over here

-

Kris: would you be with a guy?

Bojan: I'm bisexual, of course

Kris: what? 😱

Bojan: I already told you, you know this!

Kris: WHAT??

-

Joost, in the middle of having sex: babe wait, codnom broked :(

-

Kris: do you guys think the bouncer will let me in? I'm kind of tipsy

Jan: just go in confidently, he won't suspect a thing

Bojan: the last time he went in confidently he was banned from the club

-

Jan: so, how'd you sleep last night?

Kris: good

Jan: you don't seem so convinced

Kris: I slept in late

Jan: how late?

Kris: midnight

Jan: Oh, how blasphemous, how late

-

Kris, anytime they go to a new city: look at this door! I'm too tall to fit in it... look at this other door! I'm also too tall to fit in it... look at this door!

-

Bojan, about stephanie: she's the world cup and i'm bolivia.... but hopefully I'll be bolivia in '94 and she will still be the world cup

-

Jan: I'm not like Jesus, at all

Bojan: well, you kind of are in some ways

Kris: yeah, you only hang out with fags and prostitutes

Bojan, pointing at them: here you have three fags

Bojan, pointing at jure: and there's a prostitute

-

Jesse: why are you leaving everything for last minute?

Jere: because I fucking want to and I fucking can 😝

Häärijä, holding up the printed meme: 🐴🤝🏻🐴 no pelien

-

During a post-barcelona pre-party meeting:

Kris: I think that's all for today

Bojan: typing very loudly

Jan: who are you talking to?

Bojan: with someone 🥰 you know him already

Nace: ohhh the lovebirds 😏

Bojan: raising his hand up repeatedly

Kris: yes, Bojan?

Bojan: I'm really happy 🥰🥰 -instantly goes back to typing-

Kris: I'm happy for you, man

-

Jere after inflating five balloons for a party: well, my job here is done, time for my very well deserved rest

Jesse: get back up, you fuck, we need to move these chairs

-

Häärijä: bartender! Bartender! Bartender!!

Jere: I'm here, what do you want?

Häärijä: hi :) -leaves-

-

Bojan: sometimes I feel like I am batman and žare is the riddler

-

Jukka: you guys would be the worst clowns at a kid's birthday party. They would ask you for swords, and you would give them snakes

-

Kris, after seeing Jure having a sugar crash: someone give him a fucking celery or something, he's fucking melting on the couch!

-

Jere: you live life like it's last day, say sorry to people, hug people, even punch if you have to punch!

All of joker out: raising their fists to punch bojan

-

Jere: we only had a 5 euro budget for this secret santa so I bought one chocolate bar

Allu: it's not even wrapped!

Jere: wrapping paper is expensive!

-

During the secret santa:

Allu: I'm so fucking scared of seeing who jere got

Jere: so I had to buy something for...... Jesse!

Jesse: FUCK!

[im-out-of-it]

PSA: WHY I HATE THE WAY TATIANA IS WRITTEN AND A SEMI RANT ABOUT TMI AND THIS IS LONG SO IM WARNING YALL NOW SO READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

why is it when CC writes a villain, it’s always either the villain and their reasonings don’t make sense or she writes them in the worst possible way.

example: Sebastian/Jonathan is terrible and to show just how awful he is, he’s going to attempt to rape the main character (also we won’t really have her work through that.) just to show how evil he is. BITCH WE KNOW HOW EVIL HE IS AND THAT WAS UNNECESSARY. won’t go on and on about TMI because it’s a torture fest and my mind has already blacked out a shit ton so I don’t remember

another example: Tatiana as a villain makes zero fucking sense. no one actually did her wrong but she came up with all these excuses

but what vexes me the most about Tatiana (this isn’t about TMI, y’all couldn’t pay me to read that toxic series) is that no one really knows or talks about the aftermath of what she did.

I’ve made many posts about Kit (CHRISTOPHER DESERVED BETTER) but he’s barely grieved and the fact is that no one mentions how Tatiana was responsible for Barbara dying. Tatiana desired more than anything- revenge. even after the first installment, she makes a statement about wishing for more lightwoods to die- mainly her brothers children. raising Jesse isn’t her only concern but literally making sure her brothers suffer.

“Why should I believe that?” She demanded. “You let me sicken from that poison, and I could have died. You promised me that only my enemies would be harmed. And look”- she threw her arm out in the direction of the courtyard where Gideon and Gabriel waited for her. “They still live!” (Chain of gold, epilogue)

I don’t really care much about the James stuff (I’m sorry for his trauma but I’m honestly over James and that’s on the writing) and I guess she’s getting her revenge there but is it really revenge well spent if the people you’re trying to hurt don’t give a fuck?

“Those are lies,” Tatiana hissed. “I am not sick! They have tried to ruin me.”

“Not true,” said Jesse quietly. “I have come to know them now. There is a truth much harsher. One I think you know. They have not tried to ruin you over all these years. They have not plotted your downfall. They have barely even thought of you at all.”

(DAMN JESSE GO OFF KING)

Tatiana has always been kinda emotional before she lost Rupert. Will didn’t want her (I still hate him), Rupert luckily didn’t have to deal with her, but in a way Tatiana had been naive and entitled. Benedict never taught her to fight or allowed her to really have her own voice. so when Benedict turns in to some demonic worm and his brother kills their father, she doesn’t really know where to turn. (THESE ARE JUST MY STUPID OPINIONS AND HOW I LOOK AT IT)

her father is dead, she’s having a child, she thinks it’s her brothers fault that her father and husband died. Tatiana feels that Gideon and Gabriel didn’t mourn their family properly. instead they see Benedict for who she is but Tatiana doesn’t feel that way. she sees Gabriel and Gideon as betraying her for some weird reason. look, it’s not easy trying to make sense of a CC storyline but I’m trying here lmao so in a way, Tatiana feels she has no family except Jesse. doesn’t trust the shadowhunters and maybe, she was close to Benedict or saw him as some hero or icon in her life?

then when Tatiana stupidly trusts “evil warlocks” and signs her sons death off, she then again IT WAS MY BROTHERS FAULT!!!! like she uses that reason for any bad thing that happens in her life even though it’s her fucking fault????? like Gabriel and Gideon didn’t come and hire a warlock with a bad reputation to put on some safety marking on your child? Gabriel and Gideon many times tried mending fences or whatever and did what they could to invite you in their lives

if anything, Gabriel should’ve been a dick to you and cut you out completely. you didn’t deserve Lightwood manor. they should’ve took your marks off and put your bloody victimizing ass in prison. I think Gabriel and Gideon have too much goodness in their heart after all she did. like what makes me most mad about Tatiana being a villain is that NOBODY KNOWS SHE WAS BEHIND BARBARA’S DEATH!!!!! she had no issue going to belial and being like let’s have war on the shadowhunters but I want my brothers to suffer the most!!!!

I loathe that it’s never stated. I detest that Christopher isn’t grieved. I hate that Cordelia is the one to kill Tatiana. I hate Tatiana’s whole arc. it’s not convincing, doesn’t make any sense, and it’s basically just mad woman trope. after all their sister has done, why aren’t Gabriel and Gideon upset? Gideon has lost a daughter, Gabriel almost lost his little child, as well as another child, and there’s no anger???? there’s no heartbreak or?????

some have pointed out that they hate the Tessa and will sex scenes and I AGREE FULLY. why is that taking precedence over children dying?????? why is Kit’s death shown as something that didn’t matter? even Barbara’s death got more notice. why is Gabriel absent and why don’t we see their reactions after Kit? why not after Alexander? Alexander is being kidnapped and tortured and Gabriel doesn’t say shit? why is the focus all on the herondales? I get it’s CC’s obsession but it takes so much from the story

like if she didn’t focus 95% of the series on James Cordelia, we couldve had a much better story and wouldn’t be missing out on stuff.

I seriously can’t believe that no one ever tied Tatiana to what Gabriel and Gideon had to endure.

Thomas loses HIS BEST FRIEND and probably more of a parabatai than James and Matthew were. Anna loses almost two brothers within a year. Ari has to leave her second family behind because they don’t accept her- at least her mother finally does. Matthew forms an addiction and overcomes that. Alastair has to endure not having a childhood due to his shitty ass father and then has to grieve actually losing him and all that entails. James has his trauma from grace but that’s not ever handled well. Grace gets adopted and is abused from her adoptive mother. Jesse is a ghost for many years because of his mother and he has to grasp who she is and how that has affected him.

I’m just saying that there are so many concepts and ideas that CC could have focused on but instead she just does the same thing she’s been doing since TMI. using the same tropes, the same toxic storylines, never allowing the story to go through, and putting the complex and fascinating characters behind.

in conclusion, (I’m sorry for venting y’all) I hate how Tatiana is handled and that she never once really has a full conversation with her brothers over what she’s done. no one says she’s behind it. she may not have had her hand on the blade but she was behind it. MY LIGHTWOODS DESERVED BETTER. so tired of CC ruining them or pushing them to the back just so her bloody golden eyed tiger toxic bland white shadowhunters who she deems the best can shine

Gabriel and Gideon went through hell and it’s never shown or talked about. Sophie loses a daughter, Cecily a son but let’s act like they don’t matter. AND ALL THIS HAPPENS IN A SPAN OF A YEAR. so undeveloped but I���ll endure for thomastair and my favs

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 110

The Devil You Know

“The Devil You Know”

Plot Description: The demon Crowley offers to help Sam and Dean find the remaining Horsemen by leading them to the Handler for Pestilence and Death

This is gonna be a no whammy’s watch because I wanna leave my house around one and I’m already not even starting it til almost 12:30, so not off to a good start

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: gonna go with absolutely not

Really thought they were saying “prophet driven crap” not “profit driven crap”…which wouldn’t be the craziest thing in spn

Haaaate watching THIS one in 2023 already.

Calling Pestilence a sick son of a bitch is a funny little touch by the writers

Hahahahahahhahahhahahahhaaaa. The relationship between the Winchesters and Crowley is truly a highlight. Crowley’s complaints about what’s happened to him since Lucifer found out Crowley wants him dead not moving the boys emotionally is chef’s kiss

Oh, is your demon ass about to reap what you sowed to your employees???

Everybody hates Sam lmao

Oh holy shit, Sam. I know…I knew this was how it happens, but it hurts to hear Sam come to that solution

Remember when Sam was the levelheaded pacifist of the two? The one who didn’t have HELLA anger issues?

Dean’s not used to working with someone unafraid to hurt and kill humans to get what they want

Why is Dean SUCH a bad liar??

I’m not HAPPY for this demon who’s beating the shit out of Dean, but this must be ACTUALLY cathartic for him. The pressure from…I was gonna say up top but I guess I mean down below.

And it’s Crowley with the crowbar!!!

Oh. Oh. Oh shit…this was one of Sam’s college friends? HE INTRODUCED SAM TO JESS?? Well fuck

Aww the first time Crowley calls Sam a moose

I’m sorry. You’re going to what now? Crowley? What’s kicking open a hive of demons gonna do

FUCKING HELL, SAM. Stop this shit. Stop making just bad decision after bad decision

I love that there are no lengths Crowley WON’T go to. He will constantly betray and go back on betraying and it somehow goes toward the greater good so far

I know part of the terror of the hellhounds is you can’t see them but it’s also just so convenient for this show

Can people stop ruining Crowley’s suit?? HIS TAILOR has been EATEN by DEMONS

What a dilemma to be in. Do you trust Crowley to give you your soul back when he asks to borrow it? If it’s for the fate of the whole world?? If you and everyone around you has been on a suicide mission this whole season???

“Been On My Mind…”: I think this is gonna get phased out after this season but mostly because it’s the literally end of the world

[gegewrites]

Geges Masterlist <3

Thank you for ur support <3

(You don’t know me…)

 links-

Wattpad

A03

Main Blog

House MD

Greg house-

Working after hours(smut)

2 am(smut)

Encore(smut)

Rough day

A proper fuck(smut)

Dr. James Wilson

Make her mine(smut)

Pretty in Pink(smut)

Stardew Valley

Alex

Homesteading (smut)

Harvey

One Glass Was all it Took (smut)

Candids(smut)

Breaking bad

jesse pinkman 

mr.whites daughter (smut solo fic)

mr.whites daughter chapter master list 

the walking dead

Daryl dixon 

Stupid 

Lost and found(son reader)

Euphoria

Texting story series master link

🍃Fezco-

Rip to the Love of My Life

My Lil’ Killers

worried sick

party(smut)

Empathy

spoiled brat(smut)

Grandmas words

Admit it

Big Pimpin’ (smut)

peek-a-boo p1

Peek-a-boo p2 (smut)

🌸Faye

pain in the ass

blurbs/drabbles-

swingin - Fezco

Relax - Fezco

Gotta go - Fezco, rue

💵Ashtray

Nothing but platonic sister/brother relationship

Pretzel boy

This bitch

This bitch p2

💊Rue

I hate you

Supernatural

🍂Sam Winchester

stars

Toys and mirrors(SMUT)

[lacrimosathedark]

I am sick of DC killing off their heroes

I'm also sick of them keeping the same heroes and having them in like stasis age. It's annoying, especially as new characters are created.

You know what I want instead?

Let them retire.

Let Bruce hang up his cowl and hand the mantle to Cassandra, and maybe Terry later. His boys are already taking after him in other ways; Dick's become a wealthy philanthropist, Jason's probably gonna be the one to adopt 50 kids just by who he is as a person (Tyler, Bao, my personal headcanon for Shoes/Lian), and Tim is the world's greatest detective. Damian is...Damian. But he's finding his way. Let Bruce's children take an aspect of his and surpass him in it. Let him grow old with Selina!!! Also GIVE THEM HELENA!!!!

Speaking of Selina, let one of the Strays or eventually Helena take up her mantle. Maybe Lian can take her mantle, considering Emiko is Red Arrow and Roy is active...sorta. Just more cool cat ladies who aren't freakin Jade Nguyen please (no offense to any fans I just don't like her).

Let Clark be a guide and a guardian for Kon and Jon but sit back and be a person with a family unless there's a crisis. Let him just be a dorky reporter/farmboy with a loving wife looking after his aging parent(s? Is his dad alive? Continuity is weird) and being with his son and actually treating his other son like a son. Because Kon deserves it.

Let Diana stay in Themyscira or make a home on Earth. Or both! Let Donna take up the Wonder Woman mantle! Heck, let there be more than one! Nubia is a cool WW. And imagine Artemis! Maybe Cassie one day!

Fucking retire Hal Jordan. There are like 10 other earthbound Green Lanterns. John Stewart and Guy Gardner and even Kyle Rayner have had a shine in the limelight (heh limelight). Let people like Jessica Cruz and Jo Mullein and Keli Quintela get a little spotlight!

Let Arthur be a fucking king-dad. Let him just live a happy, mostly peaceful life with Mera. Let him have weird father-son bonding with Garth and Jackson. Let him raise Andy! Let him have Jr.!

Ollie will be a stubborn bitch until he fuckin dies, but put him on grandpa duty once this whole "Shoes has amnesia" thing is sorted out! He loved that when Lian was little and it was so fuckin cute. Imagine him teaching her how to shoot and she continually one-ups him because she's definitely Jade and Roy's kid, well-trained by Selina, and constantly reminds Ollie he's getting old. Once Connor's shit gets sorted, let him take up the mantle of Green Arrow again! Heck, he could do it just to prove he's better than Ollie and it'd be great.

Let. Dinah. Have. A. CHILD. She is such a good mom to Roy and to Connor even when she and Ollie are at odds, let her have her own child, even just by weird science! Give her a kiddo that can scream just like her, BAM new Canary. Bonus points if it's a boy or otherwise generally masculine kid and they still wear the fishnets as an adult. Power move.

Can Barry Allen have a break? Please? Heck, give Wally a break too, just for a bit! They've been through so much, let them chill with their wives (and maybe a boyfriend in Wally's case, I see those Nightwing crossovers) and kids and have normal-ish lives. There's so many cool speedsters! Don and Dawn Allen! Bart Allen! Wallace West! Jai and Irey West! Our enby Jesse Chambers! And that's not even all of them, there are so many fuckin speedsters.

I admittedly know next to nothing about J'onn J'onzz, but like, he's been through some shit too. M'gann can take over she seems pretty badass.

Like, just let the old heroes grow old. They don't even have to die, they can be weird wizened mentors with a running gag of 'how the fuck are you still alive?' and they just yknow, stick around. Like Alfred. (Fuck you he'll be back)

The new blood can shine without obliterating what came before.

[starlightshadowsworld]

Seto adopts Jaden where Aster has to be physically restrained by Adrian and Zane so he doesn't rip Sartorius a new one while Jaden's recovering in the infirmary.

Granted both of them aren't trying tooo hard but they need the guy alive with Seto gets here. Hence why there holding Aster back, Echo is there but she's not holding him back at all.

Bastion is with Jaden with Chazz while Alexis is calling Seto. Atticus had vanished sometime ago and Jaden himself was passed out cold, exhausted.

They are all mad but there's nothing in Aster's eyes but murder.

For you see they are all protective over Jaden but Aster is most definitely the mum friend... With the protective rage to boot.

He lost his family and forged a new one, this is the only one he has left and he'll be damned if anyone tries to hurt any of them.

And Jaden's the baby.

"You BLEW UP THE BUILDING WITH HIM INSIDE?! I'm gonna kill you, you sick son a bitch!"

And Aster rarely ever curses, he likes to have a hold on his emotions. A calmness to him, and chooses to use mind games and sarcasm as his weapons.

Years of being the pro dueling circuit and a Batman obsession does that to you.

But it doesn't change the fact Aster has a short temper, he's just better at hiding it in public.

And Sartorius standing there making excuses of why its okay to kill Jaden... Pisses him off.

Despite his size the boy is strong, glaring at his boyfriend for even trying to calm him. Zane sighs but he can't and doesn't blame him.

Aster refused to calm down, he wants blood... And it will be spilt.

Luckily Jaden chose that moment to open his eyes and look around. Still exhausted but the wounds he got are minor considering everything. "Guys?" And Aster, how he heard from down the hall is anyone's guess is out of Adrian and Zane'a grasps and is at Jaden's side immediately.

Jaden rests his head on Aster's shoulder, the other embracing him. His rage melted away into concern and a softness to his eyes as he rubbed Jaden's back.

"Your safe"

He repeated it several times, his heart breaking as Jaden slumped his arms and sobbed. Letting out all the fear and anxiety that he'd held back during the whole ordeal.

"Jesse?"

"Jesse's safe too, he's just gone to call Axel"

Meanwhile Sartorius looked way to relaxed and Adrian, hearing Jaden's cries grabbed him by the shoulders and slammed his back into the wall.

Knocking the wind out of him, his voice a dangerous whisper "dont think your off the hook" he said. Relishing in the fear in his eyes, he wouldn't hurt him there was worse to come but he never promised not to scare him.

Zane cracked his knuckles loudly for emphasis, intimidation... He could do that.

[arsonsamruby]

sam winchester pride

i have a new fic <3 hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

it’s s1 sam coming out to dean. was THIS close to making the ending sam ugly crying alone but even though dean Is like. microaggressions boy he’s not going to be a bitch about it all that’s out of character. i think he does try very hard to support sam. like he’s not an ally but probably because he doesn’t really know what an ally is. 

anyway wtf am i even saying.

___ Sam has a headache. Dean comes by, ruffles his hair, slouches into the couch. Sam licks his lips, looking away from the screen. It has loud, bright cartoons on it and in the prickling sense of dread he’s carrying with him, the stimulation is too much. 

Half of the headache is from a hard hit he took to the head, lingering pain. The other half is stress and dehydration. Unless beer counts as hydration, then in which- well, he’s covered. The screen of the television is cracked through; it’s playing Friends reruns. 

He stands abruptly. 

“Sammy, I swear to God, if you start pacing again-” Dean warns, throwing a pillow at him. Sam ducks it, somehow. His body takes up half the room. It’s hard to find space. 

He can’t help it. His feet get itchy, his legs pull tight, and it’s nice. Nice, to put in his earphones and walk around for a little while. “I’ll go out to the parking lot, promise. I won’t bother you.” 

He smiles slightly at Dean, but his brother isn’t much looking. 

The parking lot of the motel has the sticky feeling underfoot of summer heat on asphalt, and sweat. The crumbling pollen and flowers from the trees have made his half-present allergies flare up. As a kid, Sam would have allergy seasons that ran out of sync with everyone else’s. 

Go three years without a single cold, until one awful summer would come and he’d sneeze and sneeze and sneeze. He recalls: Oregon, in a rainy patch. It had been a relief to wash all the yellow pollen away with the weekly downpour. Another thing about Oregon, he’d had a best friend there. A girl. 

Huh. He tries to tuck his smile away, but it comes through like the sun through clouds. Sam looks dumb, doesn’t he? Some goofball pacing around a parking lot and smiling to himself. 

After about ten minutes, maybe more, his pace slows. The scenery is getting too humid. He wants to roll back into bed, into those cool sheets. 

“Sammy? Is that you?” 

Sam kicks his shoes off into the dirty corner. Dean’s left a bootprint on the floor there. If Sam was looking for a fight, he’d say something. “It’s me.” 

“You got a call. Someone left a voicemail. For you.” 

His voice is sharp, pounding hail on cement. “A call?” Sam replies dumbly.

Dean nods his head over to the answering machine. “I’ll put it on for you.” 

Sam’s heart begins to slow to a rolling stretch of highway. The cars moving across it are few and far between and his breath is short and dangerous. 

“Sammy?” The effusive warmth dies down after the nickname, realizing Dean’s heard it through. The voicemail, the nickname. “You gave me this number the other day. Outside the Jewel Osco?” 

He laughs. It crackles over the phone in a friendly way. Friendly the way he kissed tiny little butterflies onto Sam’s collarbones, the way his house was cool in the summer night. 

“I guess you’re a big-time developer and all so I’m not sure if you even care. But I have the jacket you left with me? The other night?” 

He clears his throat. “If you want it back, you can drop by.” The voicemail ends. 

“You leave your jacket at your friend’s house, Sammy? Come on, it’s just like you’re little again. You want me to pick it up for you?” 

Sam realizes two things: Dean hasn’t caught what the message means, and Sam wishes he would have. 

“Dean?” 

“Mmm?” 

Sam has never been able to cry with dry eyes. He can’t hide the shaky undercurrent to his voice. His eyelids feel like cement but he keeps staring at Dean. A flush of fear is blooming high on his cheeks. 

“Me and that guy, we’re not just friends. Or whatever.” 

Sam went calling for information, at his house. Said he was a real estate developer, even though the back of his neck went red with the obvious lie. The suit was cheap and he was young. He’d gotten the information and then this guy, his name is Jude, had kissed him. Sam left the suit jacket there. He’s glad he’s getting it back, all things considered. 

He still doesn’t know what possessed him to hand over his number after buying peanut butter and sandwich bread two days later. A crack in his self control, maybe. 

“What do you mean…” Dean isn’t making jokes, at least. Sam squints hard at the floor. His head feels like a matchbox. Being struck over and over again. His headache is back, erupting with a vengeance. 

“Sam, is it something- Dad did? Is it something I did? To make you, uh.” 

Sam shakes his head, sighing deeply. He wants to be a bitch about it and spit out something sarcastic. “What do you think you could have done?” 

Dean shakes his head. Murmurs, “I don’t know,” almost that Sam can’t hear him. “I guess you’re the type, though, Sammy.” Sam knows what he means by that. “As long as you don’t go around falling in love with some starry eyed dude. We still have to find Dad.” 

“About that. Don’t tell him.” Sam pointedly raises his eyebrows. Dean doesn’t have a great record of choosing- choosing him, his secrets that he keeps tight in his fists. He doesn’t have a record of letting any opportunity to be a good son slip by. 

“Sure, sure.” Dean frowns. “Hey, what about Jess? Did you lead some poor chick on up until-” 

“Shut the fuck up.” Sam’s hands are suddenly shaking. Dean leans back. He’s not the shrinking type, his shoulders stay up and guarded. “I’m not gay, I’m- I’m something else. Both, you know?” The inside of his cheek is bitten raw, he can taste the fleshier bits coming alive. 

“I don’t think that’s how it works, Sammy.” 

The telling was easy; now it’s muddier. Sam wades in anyway. “Who here is the expert, you or me?” The sick dread has risen in his stomach and is now lapping at his sodden brain, pulling him under. It’s hot as hell out but he pulls the blankets over his legs. 

“Sorry. Bad take.” 

“I loved her-” Dean doesn’t like hearing about Jess and Sam cuts himself off. 

“Never mind. I’m going to go get more beer.” Dean leaves. 

Sam looks between the ugly green blankets, the TV still on, the white, unearthly light seeping in through every crack. When he told Jess, she lit up with it, went on to ask him questions, run her fingers through his shower-damp hair and let him talk. 

Dean bursts through the door. “Sammy, I really do want to say- thank you for telling me. You wanna talk about it more, we can go get your girly coffee drink and we can talk about whatever.” 

The aimless tears in Sam’s eyes finally come to the surface. “Oh, come on,” Sam groans. “You don’t have to act like I’m that-” 

Dean interrupts him. “Here, Sammy. Here. The way I see it, you’re like Chandler Bing now.” 

Sam blinks at him. “Dean, he’s not-” 

“Well, maybe not in the show, but everyone knows he’s gay anyway. You’re like Chandler Bing. If you want to go with me and get a coffee, uh, tell me about the guy action you got at Stanford, I’ll be your Joey.” 

Sam swipes the back of his hand across his eyes. If tears were blood he would look like a murder victim. Dean approaches him nervously. “Seriously.” He wrestles Sam into a tight hug, holding him for a long few minutes. 

“Do we still have painkillers around? I have a headache.” The walls (brown wood and decades out of date) are no longer closing in on him under oppressive heat and thoughts of Jess. Dean isn’t mad. Just- just Dean. 

Life returns to normal.

[incorrectcontrol]

Incorrect Control quotes 138

Underhill: Do you want to know how I actually hurt my wrist? Jesse: Yes. Underhill: I was hula hooping. Darling and I attend a class for fitness and for fun. Jesse: Oh, my god. Underhill: I've mastered all the moves. *Shows photos on phone* The pizza toss, the tornado, the scorpion, the oopsie-doodle. Jesse: Why are you telling me this? Underhill: Because no one will ever believe you. *Deletes photos from phone* Jesse: You sick son of a bitch.

[shmaptainwrites]

hotch is at your bedside, holding your hand, 'talking' to you while you're unconscious, apologizing for giving you the command and sending you into that building, believing it was his fault when nobody could've known it was rigged to blow. not only that, but for being upset with you beforehand for something he couldn't even remember anymore and having been sour with you since then. and because of it, here you were, knocked out cold, stitches and scars littered your body, the doctors didn't even know when you were going to wake up, if ever. but you did, miraculously, you did. but aaron didn't know if he liked you when you were still out, because at least then he would still be the love of your life. and not just some memory that you couldn't quite grasp as belonging to you. "what do you remember?" morgan asked you, groggy and confused and numb on painkillers, because when the doctor gave them the diagnosis, aaron had to excuse himself because he felt sick. rossi was in the hallway with him, holding a cold water bottle to him. that was weeks ago, he would come visit you every now and again, to which you apologize because you wished you could remember loving him. not that you don't anymore, but it didn't feel real, it felt like the love belonged to someone else. the team helped a lot, bringing back memories in the forms of pictures and videos, snacks and sweaters you loved. over time, accepting that the love you held for aaron hotchner wouldn't ever fully return, you let yourself mourn it before letting your heart fall for someone else. aaron knew this too of course, but it hurt. it hurt like a bitch. especially when he knew he had to come up with something to tell jack. jack. he felt sick once more (it was common feeling now) at the thought of having to tell his little sunshine boy that he had lost yet another mother figure and that he would still be able to see you, but not the you he once knew. not the you that made pancakes with him in the morning and made smiley faces with chocolate chips, not the you that held him close on the nights the heat was broken so he wouldn't get cold, you who read him his favorite books in silly voices and tickled his sides when he was a little bit upset just to hear him giggle again, you who groggily pulled him between yourself and aaron during the nights he would get nightmares. aaron looked over to his son, who was sleeping soundly where you once slept because "it smells like her" and the boy missed and desperately wanted to see you, but aaron couldn't let him. not yet anyway. the next day aaron arrives at the hospital, not sure what the mission of today is, but he arrives anyway. and he hears your laughter before he even reaches your room, smiling at the sound. his smile fades slowly however when he sees you and spencer reid, sitting very close, too close for his liking anyway. not that it mattered what he liked anymore, he wasnt yours and you werent his, not in the way you had been a few months ago. he leaves before either one of you notice he was ever there, gathering the ring that he had saved for you and leaving it in spencer's mailbox, hoping he'd find better use for it.

i hope this angst is adequate :3

holy SHIT jess that’s not fair no no notttttt fair

i know i asked for angst but oh my god that one really did a number on me 😫

the fact that after all that jack would lose another mom, aaron would lose another love of his life and things would never be the same, it was one of those wounds that would never heal because he still saw you every day, the pain of knowing that things changed, not that they ended in death or a mutual agreement, but they changed you fell out of love with him, you didn’t remember his love for you it just all hurts so so badly

but either way thank you i needed to have my heart broken again so that’s very much appreciated

Send me your Hotch thoughts!

[taylorkellyreporting]

i hope no one minds if i inconsistently liveblog this bitch: ncis: hawai’i edition from 1x04

one thing about paramount+ the quality for eps are gonna suck in the beginning

oh my gosh???

i don’t think i’ve said it yet but seeing vanessa as a lead in her own show has been so satisfying

hmm i’m not buying this man’s story… like there’s deffo more going on than what he’s saying

aaand he’s lying

he’s not gonna be at the hospital is he?

but whyyyy would he be lying? someone tried to kill him multiple times so you’d think he’s be eager to get help from jane and co

“why’d you run?” “you reminded me of my ex wife.” JESSE’S FACE WAS PRICELESS 😭

WOAHHH METH?!

plsss ernie looked at kai like “if you don’t get your hand off of me…”

WAIT maybe the kid is selling drugs and the dad found out, tried to help and got shot bc of it?

i love when lucy gets to kick ass

he was gonna call lucy his friend 🥺

“…ew.” 😭

jesse: i’m cool! *proceeds to be uncool*

“he always takes too long on the wind up.” “don’t remember hearing a lot of complaints.” DKFJGJFJS

jane and the other guy getting off their horses in sync then boom there’s jesse still sitting down 😭

ohhh shit the rest are on the mountain aren’t they?

awww jane’s little cowboy hat

not a total eclipse of the heart oh wow 😭

wait what if the inspector killed the boyfriend in order to frame the roommate?

“she was my friend.” ☹️

“it’s just dinner.” oh we all know it isn’t

oh lucy’s terrible 😭

AVOID THEM LIKE THE CLAP KFJGJGJFJD

“i don’t know who you are…” “that’s not-“ PLEASE

“i take no pleasure-“ “oh you take all the pleasure.” “well i take very little pleasure.” lmaooo

“hope the metaphor wasn’t triggering.” he’s so 😭

“a date! as friends! i really don’t care at this point.” pls

“sounds like water.” “on an island? go figure.” the look lucy gave kate 😭

i love EVERYTHING about the kacy scene like from the convo to the kiss it was all just so soft 🥺

wonder if the person kate was talking to was cara…

the writers are sick for having kate being ready to go public just to break them up in the very next episode

this kacy scene 🥺

“that doesn’t spell-“ “i like the name chad.” 😭

this poker guy is an asshole but he’s hilarious

oh gosh lucy is at kate’s apartment…😟

“yes!” my jaw DROPPED whyyyy would the writers put that in? did they think it was funny? it’s just ooc

the pizza guys face sends me every time 😭

so lucy deffo took so long in the bathroom because she was crying

jesse and lucy 🥺

lmaooo jane’s face!!! she knows kate loves lucy

NOBODY PUTS BABY IN THE CORNER 😭😭😭

whew that “you!” will haunt me for a while

kate’s little hopeful smile turning into devastation once lucy finishes her sentence is killing me ☹️

aww that jane and lucy scene 🥺

i really hope maggie isn’t evil cause i rlly like her

kate has lucy so fucked up she’s yelling at little old ladies like it’s her job 😭

“lucy, he was jogging.” pls

a body????

oh shit maggie

“maybe he left a thoughtful letter on your desk.” 😭

so disappointed in maggie ☹️

total fangirl moment for the shows first “previously…”

THE WIGS ARE SENDING ME

everyone’s eyes immediately snapping to lucy once kate walks in 😭 she deffo got the kids in the divorce

i love sola sm i need him to stay forever

MY GOD

maggie seems so unbothered

is he maggie’s son?

“i understand…more than you know.” BEWM

“you broke my heart, maggie.” “i know.” GOD

LMAO of course sola is on the ship

“you’re the type of woman she should grow up to be.” I HATE IT HERE

JANE CRYING IN ALEX’S ARMS I CANT DO THIS

@ maggie

i’m so excited for the rest of the season but ugh i can’t believe we have to wait til march 😩

[hartenstraat]

MEET MATTHEW DAVIDSON (Sam Claflin) MATT IS 35 AND HAILS FROM BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA, USA. UNFORTUNATELY FOR YOU, THIS ROLE IS TAKEN BY JESS.

PRONOUNS: he/him

AGE & BIRTHDAY: 35, December 20

THREE POSITIVE TRAITS: Charming, Hardworking, Charismatic

THREE NEGATIVE TRAITS: Stubborn, Narrow Minded, Harsh

OCCUPATION:  On Personal Leave

BIO/HEADCANONS:

(TW: Death, Fire, Cheating, Alcoholism, Promiscuity)

For as long as Matt can remember he’s always wanted to be a firefighter. His mom would tell him stories of how he’d spaz at the sight of a fire engine or how he’d beg and beg and beg to go to the firehouse. The neighborhood station soon learned of him and even chipped in to buy a mini fire truck for him. That even throughout the years after he veered towards sports, eventually opting for theater after sustaining injuries during a football game; Matt pulled himself together with the help of physical therapy and jumped straight to the fire academy after high school graduation. By the time his nineteenth birthday rolled by he’s at work at the very station he toured and loved as a kid. At the very station that’s a couple blocks away from his childhood home in a suburb located fifteen minutes away from downtown Birmingham, Alabama.

With his dream career covered Matt viewed life a bit different. That with such a job appreciation for the little things amplified. That any given moment is a treasure, one you never know will be taken from you due to unforeseen circumstances.

Things he’s witnessed first hand from calls or stories told from his fellow team flung him into that grim reality. Seeing such things did bring forth a need to drink on occasion to try to push past the pain and horror he’s witnessed. Plus the occasional random hook up help. A lot.

He cares so damn much for people and wants to be there for them but sometimes it’s just not possible. During a late-night call Matt hopped on an ambulance to help a fellow EMT buddy, training he’s gone through himself. When they arrived at the hospital he waited around to hear of any news of the man they frantically tried to save. While in the waiting room he struck up a conversation with a woman who turned out to be a doctor. A pediatrician to be exact.

That’s how Matt met Betsy.

Now, when it comes to Matt he can find himself attracted to people quite easily. There’s just too many things people do that pull him in. Can be how attractive they are, or the way they laugh. Even sometimes it’s just their outlook on life. Which happened to be all three that night with Betsy. The pair of them fell into a whirlwind romance and within a couple months she practically lived at his apartment. His parents voiced concern about how quickly things were going for them, especially when a near twenty year old Matt bought an engagement ring. What’s the point in waiting and waiting when you feel you’ve found that very person who completes you?

Matt planned a romantic getaway for them however he was called into work into a shift that forever changed the course of his life.

It’s a call which continues to haunt his dreams. A call which took many, many years of therapy to manage to not feel he was an utter failure. That he didn’t try hard enough. The harsh reality was it was far too late by the time he reached that kitchen; the flames demolishing everything in its path. Including the two kids stuck in the cabinet terrified of what’s happening in their home. It was too late. Too late for them.

That fire consumed him. Those images. Those screams. Those pleas for help. For their mom. He couldn’t stop thinking about it. He couldn’t stop thinking about their father. The sick son of a bitch who intentionally set fire to their family home. Such anger ate at him and Matt wanted to hurt that prick with his bare hands but he knew he couldn’t. That his surviving wife and daughter were already going through enough loss as is and Matt thought of his own family. Of Betsy. Even with thinking about them he didn’t go to therapy. That such a tragic event warrants him to speak to someone about it but he kept saying he’s fine. That 's the nature of the job. Yet, it kept him from sleeping. From eating. His drinking increased and he eventually withdrew from Betsy. Months went by and it was when his captain pulled him aside, Matt reeked of alcohol from the night before, that he told him he needs to get his shit together since this destructive behavior is placing his crew in danger.

Soon after that talk Matt dragged himself to therapy yet it was too late for his relationship as Betsy had enough and moved all her things out of his apartment and took a job at another hospital in Huntsville.

Matt’s early twenties weren’t easy. After his breakup he wanted to say fuck it to everything and just live at the bottom of a bottle, or fifty, but he didn’t. But it also meant he relied heavily on his therapist and after years he feels he’s able to function. That he’s able to return to his old goofy self. That he can be the guy who talks about some shitty 80s comedy or quote random scenes from movies and TV shows. Or that he can return to working on a classic car during his free time or even take part in a random mud run for the hell of it.

When he made the decision to move from Birmingham a few years after his break up his family took it hard. His parents and three sisters didn’t want to see him go but Matt needs to see what else is out there. He bounced from New York, Vegas, San Francisco; taking jobs at different stations and meeting all kinds of people. Yet, none of these places truly felt like home to him.

Matt decided to return to Birmingham. Maybe he’d feel that sense of home once he’s returned. However after he settled back at his old firehouse he ran into Betsy, someone he’s not spoken to in years. Old memories resurfaced, along with unresolved anger and resentment. With time they eventually worked through the pain they’ve inflicted upon each other and Matt soon found himself dating her once again. Things felt like old times and no matter how much his family disapproved of this relationship, after everything she put him through, Matt pushed on with it. Maybe they could make it work this time. He’s in therapy now and able to handle things better than before. They’ve both grown throughout the years and could actually make this last.

That is until Matt discovered Betsy’s been two-timing him with a doctor at her hospital.

This shattered Matt. More than when she left him all those years ago.

The last two years with her was a complete lie and he couldn’t handle being in the same city with her again. Or with his family he was greatly disappointed with his poor decision to get with his ex again. His initial reaction was to move back to New York or San Francisco. To return to one of those stations again and start over. But that didn’t feel like a big enough change for him. Not when his mind and heart aren’t in a good place after being hurt. Again. How can he take care of people when he feels so damn low about himself?

Matt decided to make a drastic move this time. To go someplace he’s thought of visiting but hadn’t been able to due to time. Thankful for his frugal lifestyle he’d managed to save enough money to enjoy an extended vacation. One away from friends and family from back home. He knows they care. That they want to help but he needs to focus on himself and figure out what the hell he wants in life. So, Matt booked a flight to Amsterdam and secured himself a little place above a flower shop. It’s a giant change from what he’s used to but who knows. It might be exactly what he needs.

[sams-sass]

The Others pt 7

Here is the next part to The Others. Hope you guys like it, thanks for all the love, and as always: stay sassy.

*sorry if I tagged you already, I accidentally deleted the original post. 

Read Parts One through Six here:

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Part Five

Part Six

Pairings: Sam x Psychic!Reader

Warnings: Discussions of death, discussions of past and self doubt, angst, fluff

-----------------

You were laying across the backseat of the impala, Jenny laying on top of you. You felt her hot tears hitting your shirt and soaking through to your skin. You were taking her home. There was no need for her to suffer anymore than she already had. She had seen and dealt enough with the demons. Her family had been worried sick since she was reported missing at the school and it was time she went home. It was time she had the chance to recuperate in peace with people she loved and who loved her right back.

“I’m so sorry.” She said against your chest, her voice was small.

“Don’t be sorry. You have been so brave throughout this whole thing. You deserve some rest.” You ran your fingers through her hair and wrapped your arms around her.

“Y/N is right, Jenny. You have done more than enough, you should be with your family now. We’ll get the sons of bitches.” Dean said, looking at the two of you in the rearview mirror. Jenny sniffled and nodded, closing her eyes tight in fear.

“What am I going to tell them?” She asked, sitting up and looking out the window.

“As much of the truth as you want. If you want to make up a complete lie, I will back you up. If you want to tell them everything, I will back you up. Tell them whatever you feel comfortable with.” You found her eyes, sending her a reassuring smile and grabbing her hand. She tried to smile back, but you could still see the worry in her eyes.

Dean pulled up to her house about an hour later, all the lights were on and you could see movement inside. Jenny’s lips parted and all the air in her lungs felt trapped. She closed her eyes and shook her head slightly. The door flung open and her mom ran out onto the driveway. You saw Jenny’s face twist in both pain and relief as she opened the door and ran into her mothers waiting arms. They cried together, holding each other tightly in the cool evening air. You touched your cheek and felt the wetness on your skin, realizing you were crying as well. You got out of the car and walked over to them, touched Jenny on the shoulder. They pulled apart and her mother quickly gathered you in her arms as well.

“Thank you. Thank you so much for bringing my baby home.” She whispered in your ear. Jenny pulled you to her after her mom let you go. You inhaled her scent and let it stay in your lungs for a moment. She pulled back slightly, still holding you in her arms. She looked you deep in the eyes.

“You can do this, Y/N. You go back there and you kick ass. You are so strong, I am so proud of you. You kill those bastards for what they did to me.” Her eyes were filled with tears, her face red and swollen. You nodded, holding back your emotions. She let you go and fell against her mom again, they walked inside holding each other as you climbed back in the car.

“Ready?” Sam asked, turning around to look at you. You paused for a moment and let the question settle inside you. You were ready. Ready to take the fight to them, ready to use whatever strength you had to get the job done. You were ready to end this.

“Ready.” You answered, your voice was even and calm.

 --------------------

Jenny didn’t live far from campus, you pulled in about an hour and a half later. The three of you went into your apartment to make a plan and for a place to crash. You moved everything off the dining room table so the boys could lay out maps of campus, books bobby gave you, and a journal. Sam left to get you guys food, leaving you and Dean alone.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea if you come with us.” Dean didn’t even wait for the door to fully close.

“Sam already gave me the ‘I don’t want you to get hurt’ speech.” You answered, looking up at him.

“That’s exactly why I don’t want you to come, Y/N. I was with him when Jess died. It almost broke him. He had nightmares about her death for months afterward. He couldn’t mention her without almost breaking down, I still see him struggle with it. I also see that he cares for you deeply and I can’t watch him get hurt again, not like that. Especially because it’s this demon.” Dean had come around the table and took your shoulders in his hands. Looking directly into your eyes.

“Dean, I can’t imagine what you and Sam have gone through because of this demon. Your mom and then Sam’s girlfriend, it’s horrible and I am so sorry. I have to do this, Dean, I have to fight them for Jenny. She is like a sister to me, and what they did to her…and that I had to watch it. I want them gone. For good. For Jenny, for Jess, for your mom, and for you two. I completely understand that you don’t want me to get hurt. If I was in your shoes, I would be saying the same thing. I’m going with you. I have to do this.” Now it was your turn to look into Dean’s eyes.

“Well, you’re stubborn. You and Sam have that in common.” Dean laughed, taking his hands off your shoulders. You giggled too, playing with a strand of hair. Sam walked in with food and beer, handing one to his brother and then you. You ate in relative silence, most of the food untouched. Then you made your plan.

“I say, we just give them what they want. Me on a platter.” Sam said, taking a sip of beer.

“No, Sam, that’s just stupid and too risky.” Dean argued back. “Somehow we need to get in there so we can make devils traps in the house.” He leaned back in his chair.

“What if we go first thing in the morning and watch? We know how many of them are in there and they can’t all be missing class.” You suggested, placing your elbows on the table.

“Best idea I have heard all night.” Dean replied, standing and stretching his arms out. “I’m exhausted, night you two.” He then walked away and into Jenny’s room to get some rest, not giving Sam anytime to argue back. Sam let out a long sigh next to you and sunk a little in his chair, defeated.

“I’m gonna shower, why don’t you find something for us to watch.” You stood and ran your fingers through his hair, cupping his jaw with your hand before walking away.

After your shower, you joined Sam on the couch with your beer. He was still flipping through channels, his eyes clearly not seeing the screen. You reached over and placed your hand over his, taking the remote and turning off the TV.

“Wanna talk about it?” You asked, pulling your legs up onto the couch.

“Talk about what?” He asked back. There was a smidge of anger in his voice.

“Whatever is bothering you.” You answered, leaning closer to him.

“This demon. It killed my mom. It killed Jess. Dean and I, we think it killed our dad too. Y/N, if it does anything to you…I don’t think I could handle it. I don’t think I could go on. I have already lost three people and my childhood to this demon. I can’t-I can’t lose anyone else I care about. I really wish you would just stay here tomorrow.” He tried again to tell you how he felt. You could see the unshed tears and raw emotion in his eyes as he spoke. You licked your lips and looked down at the couch, taking a deep breath into your lungs.

“When I was 10 I had a crush on this boy down the street. His name was Riley. He was a year older than me so I thought he was really cool and mature.” You smiled at the memory, Sam smiled with you. “One day, we were playing outside. It was a nice sunny day out. I remember the smell of his moms flower garden. He touched my shoulder, nothing weird, but I saw it. I saw how he died. I watched him get hit by a car while he was on his bike. I saw his bike, the metal mangled and twisted in the road. I felt his last breath leave his lungs. I heard his head hit the pavement so hard it cracked. And do you know what I did?” You looked directly at Sam then, he was hanging on every word you were speaking. He shook his head and waited for the answer. “Nothing. I didn’t do a damn thing. I went home and never spoke of it to anyone. I was petrified. What would happen if I told someone? Would they yell at me? Would I get in trouble? Then, the most amazing thing happened. Nothing. Nothing happened to Riley, he went and lived his life. For two more years. On a warm summers night in the middle of July, fate took him. The crickets were so loud that night, and the moon was full and heavy in the sky. When he was 13 years old he was riding his bike home from a friends, it wasn’t too late but it was already dark out. The car didn’t see him. He died and it was all my fault because I kept this horrible secret to myself. I didn’t tell anyone because I was scared what would happen to me, and Riley died because of it.” You were crying now, the tears rolling down your cheeks.

“Y/N, it wasn’t your fault, you probably couldn’t have stopped it.” Sam leaned towards you, his hand running over yours.

“I felt it as soon as it happened. I was in my room, enjoying my Friday night and my heart stopped. I heard his breath in my ear. He never came to visit me, but I couldn’t get his face out of my mind. On summer nights when I am laying alone in bed, the wind outside will sound like his last breath. When the moon is full and high in the sky, I see the way the moonlight reflected off his bike in the street. When the nights are warm and the crickets are singing their endless song, I can still see his honey brown eyes and his curly black hair. Ever since the day he died I have lived in fear of closing my eyes, for what I might see when I do. I am always afraid of the cold and lonely nights when the air changes and I see my breath against the pitch black of night. Who will come into my room? Who will touch me with their boney, cold and grey skin. Who will whisper in my ear with their rotting breath?” You looked up at him. Your eyes wide. “Then you came. I touched you and I felt warm again, you kissed me and I saw colors again. I have to do this, Sam. I have to fight them, because if I don’t it will haunt me for the rest of my days. I will see those girls every time I close my eyes, just like Riley. I got pulled into this, and I intend to see it through.” You swallowed down your emotions, your throat raw from crying.

“I know what you mean. When I touch you, I feel warm too. I feel excited and calm all at once. When we kissed, I swear I could feel myself being filled from head to toe. I’m not sure what spell is over us, but I don’t want it to ever be broken.” He reached up, running his fingers over your cheek. “We’ll do this together.” He nodded once, looking you in the eye. You smiled and jumped on top of him. Your arms flying around his neck and holding him impossibly close to you. Your legs on either side of his trim waist, heat rolling through you. Your lips molded against his, bring all sorts of feelings up. The way his hands twisted into your hair, pulling ever so slightly. The way he listened to your every breath and sound, following your exact instructions. It was like the two of you were reading each other, never ending chapters written with heartbeats and breaths across skin.

The next morning you were in the impala outside the frat house. It was early. You yawned in the cold and staleness of morning, blinking your eyes. You held the coffee cup in both of your hands, keeping them warm. Movement. All of you turned and looked through whatever windows you could see into. Two boys left the house. They didn’t say a word the entire time, just walking with vacant expressions. About fifteen minuets later three more left, wearing the same vacant expressions. The three of you exchanged looks. Another twenty minuets went by and then two more walked out, one of them being Brandon. After they were out of eyesight you went in, Dean first with you and Sam behind. Sam kept you closely behind him. Sam had his gun raised in front of him. He was in a crouching stance as he silently walked around the house, clearing each room.  

“Hold onto my jacket.” He whispered, turning his head slightly. You reached up and grabbed a fistful of his jacket, stepping with him throughout the house. There was no one in the house, you were all alone.

“Well, once again, that was weirdly easy.” Dean said, lowering his gun slightly. Sam nodded in agreement. Even for you, it did seem too easy. The boys lifted rugs, moved beds, and rearranged furniture to paint devils traps on the floor. They stood on chairs and counters to paint them on the ceiling as well. You looked around the house, touching things as you went. Something was bothering you that you couldn’t quite put your finger on. There was a strange buzzing happening inside you, it seemed like it was leading you somewhere. You closed your eyes and opened your mind. Listening to the energy around you. It was pulling you towards the basement. You opened the door and turned the light on. The moldy and stale air hit you in the face instantly. You gingerly walked down the stairs and into the disgusting and grimy basement. Dirt and dust covered every inch. Insects and rodents, dead and alive, were everywhere. You moved through the basement, keeping your arms close to your side. There was a doorway, when you walked through you saw the room from your vision. This is where they hurt Jenny. This is where the yellow eyed demon spoke to you. This is where they would sacrifice you. The buzzing was back and stronger than before. You held up one hand as you walked, letting it guide you. Off to the side was a door. You touched the doorknob and took a sharp inhale.

A girl laid on the table. She was bloody and old looking. Her eyes were wide, but unseeing. She was dead. You saw that she had the same brand on her chest that Jenny had. Brandon lifted her from the table and opened the door. He tossed her body in with the others before he wiped his hands on his jeans, his face a scowl.

You blinked back into the now, your breath coming in ragged. You raced back up the stairs and ran directly into Sam, wrapping your arms around him. He held you against him, his fingers tracing your neck.

“They are in the basement.” You mumbled against his shirt. “All of them, the girls. They are down there.” You felt him lift his chin off the top of your head. You leaned back to look at him, his face was one of worry.

“Sam, take her back to her apartment.” Dean walked over to the two of you.

“Dean, what if they come back?” Sam asked, letting you go.

“I’ve got an arsenal.” Dean replied, flicking his head towards his duffel bag.

“I’ll drop her off and then come right back.” Sam said, walking towards the door. You in tow. You wanted to help, but something told you there was something that needed to be done. Something that you didn’t want or need to see. You and Sam climbed into the impala and headed back to your apartment. It was two o’clock in the afternoon, most of the day spent at the house. You and Sam walked into the apartment, something didn’t feel right. A chill ran through you and you stopped dead in your tracks. You heard the sound of a hard object against a skull. Heard Sam fall to the floor. Then you felt the sharp pain yourself, you fell to the floor. Blackness took you.

You woke with a throbbing and heavy pain in your head. You blinked a few times, your vision blurry. You lifted your head feeling your body screaming at you. You groaned and tried to move your hands, only to realize they were tied behind your back. You panicked and began to wiggle, jolting your arms against the ropes.

“Hello, Y/N.” Your eyes widened and your head shot up towards the voice. Brandon. “I see you brought me a Winchester as well.” He was leaning against the doorframe into your living room.

“I’ll kill you.” Sam spoke, he was tied up too. His back against yours in the middle of your kitchen. There was suddenly banging on the door.

“Sam! Y/N!” Deans voice was panicked as he pounded on the door.

“Can’t let big bro get to you.” Brandon pushed himself off the wall and placed his hands on you and Sam’s shoulders. There was a whooshing sound and then you were in the basement. The filthy and disgusting basement. All the frat boys were standing around the table in the basement. Their bodies were covered in bruises and their eyes were a deep onyx. There was another man there that you didn’t recognize. He was older than the others and you didn’t understand why he was there in the basement. He had a large smile on his face that looked ghastly against the darkness of the situation. He turned his head slightly and you caught a glimpse of his eyes, a pale and spotted yellow. He looked directly at you. Directly into your eyes.

“Hello, Y/N, I have waited so so long.” His voice was grossly cheery in the dank basement.

Tags: @watermelonlipstick​ @virtualheaderssupernaturalnerd​ @aeo10fan​ @hecatemacbeth7​ @doctorlilo​ @wnchetrs​ @lukawats​ @defenderrosetyler​

[cosmiceverafter]

Whiskey Lullaby

Summary: The aftermath of Alex leaving Roswell. 

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, depression, death, abuse (shed scene memory). 

This fic is for @michaelguerinweek - Day 3: “I don’t want you to go.” (distance/separation) It’s quite angsty. 

***

The whiskey was bitter and stung his tongue, but Michael devoured the pain.

Hell, he welcomed it.

Michael wanted to forget. Forget how the love of his life’s guitar calloused fingers felt caressing his naked body. The way that smooth tongue sucked deeply upon the sensitive skin behind his ear where it met his neck’s skin. But most importantly, he wanted to forget those damn soulful eyes and the way they had peered into his with a promise of forever.

More whiskey.

There would never be enough whiskey for this type of numbing tincture, the rational part of his brain exclaimed.

Michael swore loudly and chucked the empty glass bottle deep into the desert, hearing it shatter within the distance as if it had been his heart he had thrown instead.

God, he was so damn angry. Alex had just left, left without a word.

Fuck.

The reasonable and raw part of the whole ordeal was that Michael knew this was his own damn fault.

Michael bit his lip and tasted blood, cursing the tears starting to form in his eyes.

If only he hadn't pushed Alex away. If only he had told Alex the truth, not just about Rosa, but about who he really was.

God, he had wanted to and even replayed the conversation over-and-over inside of his mind.

But after that night with Rosa, Michael had changed. They were the monsters the humans believed them to be. How would Alex ever want him knowing what they had done? Rosa was like Alex’s sister, and they had erased her from oblivion.

Guilt, not for the first time, soaked his veins as the whiskey had.

The Pod Squad had covered up a murder and ruined the innocent image of a girl who had her whole life in front of her. All to protect one of their own. He would do it again for his found family, but it still made his stomach feel sick.

He had thought he was a good kid. One that studied and tried for more. But that was the lie, wasn’t it? Michael wasn’t normal. He was an alien from another planet. He’d never truly fit in. And after what had happened with Rosa, the realization had made him stop trying.

Michael tried to pretend it hadn’t happened, but the way Alex had looked into his eyes every single time as they made love, he had felt like a fraud. It would push him to rebel even harder, even though he saw it was breaking Alex’s heart.

The guy believed in him for some reason, which he used to love but now loathed.

Alex was too good for this world. He would never truly deserve him. Jesse Manes had been the devil in his ear, haunting him at every move.

Michael looked down at his injured hand and clenched his eyes shut from the painful memory.

He had just wanted one good thing in this stupid life, even if he didn’t deserve it.

But it was too late for that. He had acted rash and ridiculous, throwing his future away as he drank himself into oblivion in the middle of the day, secretly pouring his stash of acetone into the glass.

Michael had gotten into bar fights and had once again been thrown into jail.

It was nothing new but this time when he had been released, everything had changed.

His love had left him.

The pain hadn’t settled in as he knew and hoped Alex understood he would’ve followed that human anywhere on this planet.

Michael had thought perhaps he was still in a drunken stupor, but the sad truth of the matter was that aliens recovered quicker to sobriety than the typical human.

This nightmare had been a reality check, the worst kind, and Michael felt sick in his truck’s back as he re-lived every second of it.

He had made his way to the Manes’ residence after he had been released, even though he had known Jesse would kick his ass. But he had realized this time in jail, that he needed to get his shit together before his once-promising future really did wash away.

Michael had wanted to go and find Alex and apologize for being a dumbass for far too long. He wanted to prove to be the man Alex believed he could be. And he also wanted to open himself up raw and finally tell Alex everything. Absolutely everything.

The thought was terrifying, to say the least, but it was worth it. He saw Alex by his side for the long haul. Michael didn’t know much, but he knew they belonged together. 

He had known this the first time he had heard Alex sing and play his music in school. The moment had touched him in a way nothing else had. For once, he had wanted to know someone other than his alien siblings. Michael had wanted something for himself. 

Perhaps there was more to earth than he had come to understand.

But that apology and the communication of who he was and what they had done that night with Rosa, wouldn’t happen, because as he had searched around Alex’s house, a neighbor had asked who he was looking for.

“Alex Manes,” he had said innocently, a bit out of breath.

The older gentleman shook his head and said the words that had crumbled Michael’s existence. “Sorry, son. Alex Manes enlisted into the army and left first thing this morning. He’ll be gone for quite some time.”

Michael had felt as though he had been stabbed repeatedly in the chest, yet the words refused to register inside his intelligent brain. “I’m sorry, what? He’s...gone?”

“He sure is. His father is proud of his choice to go. Serving his country and all.”

“I’m sure he is,” Michael had growled. That sadistic son of a bitch had forced Alex, Michael just knew it. This was no choice. Alex wouldn’t have left him...not like this. 

“I’m sure Sergeant Manes will leave you his son’s mailing address.”

Not in this lifetime. Michael shook his head, “Nah. Thanks, though.”

He hadn’t remembered walking away. He hadn’t reflected going to the liquor store and getting several bottles. He hadn’t recollected driving his truck out to the desert to his and Alex’s spot. But he had remembered taking his first sip that day.

Because that sip of whiskey had been a lullaby of a soulmate gone away; the missing void would now be a permanent hole shaped resident etched into his dead beating heart. It was the love who wasn’t coming back. The one that got away.

The only one.

“I’ve lost my human,” he whispered to the stars foolishly, talking to the family he’d never actually known, the ones who had left him, too.

Michael looked at the night sky, knowing that now the world would be a darker place. The sun would not shine as brightly, and the stars would be forever muted with their brilliance.

With each sip, he said goodbye to the future he had hoped to have. He washed away the dreams and desires and replaced them with self-hatred and a mask of someone he no longer recognized.

Which was fine by him.

This would be the new song of his life here on earth.

His whiskey lullaby.

[sunriserose1023]

One Last Job [Two]

WORD COUNT: 2957 WARNINGS: Angsty, emotional, talk of a stalker CHAPTER SUMMARY: You try to get used to having a bodyguard, and a seemingly innocent act proves why you need one.

Masterlist

PREVIOUS: CHAPTER ONE

You were up with the sun the next morning, foregoing the run/jog your trainer wanted you to do for a swim in the indoor heated pool. You waded into the water from the shallow end, taking a deep breath before ducking your head and swimming under the water. 

You lost count of how many laps you swam, and when your lungs and limbs were burning, you rolled to your back and floated. 

All you could think about, all that you’d thought about through your restless night was Bucky. Why, you didn’t have the slightest clue, but there was something about him you just couldn’t shake. He was attractive, that was for damn sure. But there was something else, something deeper … maybe even a little dark. 

Something you wanted to know more about. 

You ducked your head back under the water, swimming to the side of the pool. You got to the ladder and lifted your head, gasping as you gripped the ladder tightly. 

“Jesus, you scared me.”

Bucky smiled from where he was sitting, elbows on his thighs, hands clasped together. 

“I was making a round and thought I heard some splashing.”

You nodded. 

“I didn’t feel like running this morning.”

Bucky nodded, and for some reason, you kept talking, answering questions he didn’t verbally ask. 

“Ollie knows how to swim. He’s pretty good, but he also knows not to come down here without me or Clint or Natasha.”

Bucky nodded again. 

“That’s good.”

You went quiet, feeling suddenly self-conscious, despite the modest one-piece swimsuit you were wearing. Bucky cleared his throat and stood up, making you give a shaky breath when you saw the dark jeans encasing his thick thighs, the black t-shirt stretching around his muscular arms. He nodded back towards the bench he’d been sitting on. 

“I’ll give you a minute to dry off.” “Thanks. I was thinking about cooking some breakfast, if you’re interested?”

Bucky gave you one of those quirky half-smiles. 

“I never turn down food.”

You smiled and he walked away, and after getting a nice view of his backside, you ducked your head beneath the water again, sputtering as you came up, shaking your head and exhaling. 

You scrambled eggs and grated cheese into them, turning slices of bacon as you worked. Toast was in the toaster, and there were fresh oranges ready to be squeezed in the basket on the counter, which Steve was currently working on. Clint was standing by the coffee pot, a frown on his face and a mug in his hand at the ready. Bucky walked in when you set some bacon onto a plate and moved it to the center island, managing to grab one slice before glaring at Clint and Steve. You smiled at Bucky as you turned back to the stove. 

“You’ve got to be quick, or else you’ll lose a finger. But don’t worry. I’m planning on cooking at least a metric ton for Steve alone.”

Steve stepped over to you, a pitcher of freshly squeezed orange juice in his hands. He kissed your cheek, putting the pitcher beside the now-empty plate. 

“Are you sure you won’t marry me?”

You smiled. 

“Sorry, bud. My heart belongs to another, albeit smaller, man.”

Steve smiled, shaking his head as he crunched on a piece of bacon. Bucky swallowed as he watched the ease between you and Steve. Since he hadn’t had coffee, Clint wasn't coherent yet, and he purposefully wasn’t wearing his hearing aids so he wouldn’t have to talk to anyone. 

You turned to meet Bucky’s eyes, a soft smile on your pretty face. 

“Scrambled eggs okay?”

Bucky could only nod, and you carried a plate to him, setting it on a watermelon-shaped placemat in front of him. 

“Salt and pepper’s in the shaker there. Pepper grinder on the bottom, turn it over for salt. Butter’s in the dish there.”

He met your eyes and you smiled, color rising high on your cheeks. You went back to the stove, bringing another plate to the pineapple placemat beside Bucky’s. Another plate was placed on a placemat shaped like an orange, and the smallest plate was set on a lime wedge.

Bucky watched as you set a protein bar and a bottle of water on the counter by the door, taking a carton of yogurt from the fridge and grabbing a spoon before you hopped up onto the counter. You crossed your legs and dipped the spoon into the yogurt, and Bucky ducked his head as he studied the breakfast in front of him. 

A smile lit up your face when Ollie trudged into the kitchen, mouth open in a wide yawn. He walked over to you, putting his face at your stomach, and you smiled as you brushed your fingers through his hair. 

“Good morning, sunshine.”

He grunted at you, and you gave a quiet laugh as you bent to kiss the top of his head. 

“Your plate’s on the lime. Go eat before it gets cold.”

Ollie nodded, yawning again as he climbed up onto the barstool, propping one elbow on the table and resting his head in his hand. Clint shuffled over to sit beside him, second cup of coffee in one hand. Steve sat beside Bucky and started shoveling food into his mouth. 

And when Bucky looked your way again, he found your eyes on him. 

He watched your back straighten as the clicking of high heels could be heard coming down the hall. Ollie perked up, a smile coming to his lips. Bucky glanced over his shoulder and his eyes widened. 

Black stilettos, shapely legs, a tight black pencil skirt, a flowy white shirt, perfect crimson curls. Her lips were almost the same color as her hair, dark eyelashes hiding bright blue eyes that widened as she noticed the crowd in the kitchen. One perfectly manicured eyebrow raised. 

“My invitation to this party must have gotten lost.” “Auntie Tasha, these are Uncle Clint's friends. You know Steve, but this is Bucky. He’s going to Bancougar with Mom.”

Natasha slowly nodded. 

“It’s Vancouver, baby.”

Ollie nodded, whispering “Vancouver” under his breath. Natasha met your eyes, her eyebrow raising again. 

“So Vancouver’s still a go?”

You nodded, setting the yogurt you had barely touched onto the counter. Natasha made a humming noise, sighing as she looked to the clock, then back to the kid. 

“Eat your breakfast, buddy. We’ve got to go soon.”

Ollie nodded, digging into his breakfast. Natasha pulled her cell phone out of her bag and made her way to you, focusing on the screen, missing the way you pushed the yogurt behind you. 

Bucky saw it, though. 

Natasha shook her head, blowing out a breath. 

“I’m so sick of these stupid magazines. How many times can I say ‘no comment’ before they listen?” “I got an email from Jesse at the—“ “No.”

You blinked. 

“No?”

Natasha shook her head. 

“We’re not giving any interviews since whoever at the police station let the news leak about …”

You and Natasha glanced to Ollie, who was giving Steve a run for his money with how quickly he was eating. Natasha nodded, speaking softly. 

“You know. That’s all anyone will want to talk about, and the focus needs to be on the movie and your nominations.”

You nodded, looking down at your hands. Bucky glanced over at Steve when his foot was nudged, and Steve shook his head as he drank from his glass. Ollie wiped his mouth with a napkin and jumped down from his chair. 

“Done!” “Go brush your teeth and get dressed.”

You and Natasha had spoken at the same time, and Ollie giggled as he ran off down the hall. Natasha blew out a breath and shook her head as she walked towards the bottle of water and protein bar on the end of the counter. 

“Send him to the car when he’s ready. I don’t want to be late today.”

The clicking of her heels was all that could be heard, and you gave a shaky sigh as you slid off the countertop. You turned and put your hands on it, hanging your head. Clint slid off his chair and went to you, laying a hand on your back, murmuring softly. Steve tapped two fingers against Bucky’s wrist, and he stood up, following Steve out of the kitchen. 

When they were down the hall in a sitting room or something—Bucky didn’t know half the terminology for the hotel-like house—Bucky shook his head. 

“What the hell was that?”

Steve sighed. 

“That was Natasha.” “Why’d she talk to Y/N like she was something stuck on the bottom of her shoe?” “She didn’t mean it like that. Nat’s practically her boss, so—“ “No, they’re sisters. Sisters don’t talk like that to each other.” “It’s a different dynamic here, Buck.”

Bucky shook his head. 

“She shut her down like she was an annoying kid. Did you notice how Y/N hid her food when Natasha walked in?”

Steve’s eyebrows furrowed and he glanced towards the kitchen as Bucky shook his head again. 

“That’s not okay, Steve.” “It’s not our business, Buck.” “But—“ “Save it. You’re just here to be her bodyguard, remember?”

Bucky grit his teeth. 

“Don’t toss my words back at me, you son of a bitch.” “Hey! Don’t get mad at me.”

Bucky shook his head, turning and walking out of the room, back down the hall to the kitchen. He stood in the doorway and watched you, as you slid plates into soapy water and washed them by hand. After a few quiet moments, he spoke. 

“All this money and no dishwasher?”

You glanced over your shoulder and gave him a tight smile. 

“Keeps me grounded to wash the dishes myself.” “Need a hand?”

You shook your head, turning back around and scrubbing some more. Bucky pushed off from the wall he was leaning against, opening drawers until he found a dish towel. He took a plate from the drainer and dried it, moving to place it in the cabinet you’d gotten it from. 

You watched him as he did the rest of the dishes that way, and you gave a shaky breath when you let the soapy water drain from the sink. You washed your hands and noticed Bucky’s raised eyebrow when he saw how pink your hands and forearms were. You swallowed and stepped around him, and he gently took hold of your upper arm. 

“Is she always like that?”

You closed your eyes, but nodded. Your voice was barely a whisper. 

“She’s just trying to do what’s best for us.” “And that’s treating her money maker like garbage?”

You opened your eyes, meeting his. He let go of you, stepping back just enough to cross his arms over his chest and lean against the counter. You swallowed, speaking softly. 

“She’s good with numbers and schedules and things. When my career took off, Mom asked me to give her a place in my …” “Entourage?”

You nodded, and Bucky spoke, just as softly as you. 

“That doesn’t give her the right to treat you like this.”

Tears filled your eyes, and you bit your bottom lip as you looked towards the window over the sink. 

“Ollie loves her so much. And she’s so good to him. I can’t … She stood by me when I was pregnant and when he was a newborn. They have such a bond, and I can’t break that. No matter how she treats me.”

You sniffled, laying a hand against your stomach as you tried to step away. Bucky took hold of your arm again, his fingers gently brushing your elbow. 

“You didn’t finish your breakfast.”

Your eyes widened as you met his eyes and he lifted a shoulder. You gave a shaky breath as he gave your elbow a gentle squeeze. 

“Can you get me your flight information for next week? And a list of people you normally associate with in Vancouver?”

You nodded, and he held your eyes for a moment longer, then gave your elbow one more squeeze before he walked away. 

You paced your office as you flipped through the script you’d been sent, reading the lines out loud. You stopped when there was a knock on your door, and you smiled when Steve poked his head in. You lifted a hand and waved, and Steve smiled as he stepped in the room. 

“Am I interrupting?”

You shook your head, tossing the script on your desk. 

“I can use a break.”

Steve shut the door behind him, leaning against it as you went to sit in your desk chair. You met his eyes and smiled at him, speaking softly. 

“I like Bucky. He’s good.” “Told you.”

You laughed softly. 

“He’s very observant.”

Steve sighed, pushing off from the door. 

“Is she still riding you?”

You blew out a breath, leaning your head back. 

“She’s just trying to do what’s best for us.” “Y/N. Come on. It’s me.”

You closed your eyes, shaking your head. You pushed up from your chair, shaking your head as you started pacing the office. 

“I need to work. Now, more than ever. The nominations were nice, but I need to keep my face out there, keep the focus on me.” “Is that what she’s telling you?” “It’s what everyone is telling me.”

Steve just watched as you paced the floor, until you stopped and turned to face him. 

“And if I keep busy, I won’t be able to focus on how truly terrified I really am.”

Tears suddenly filled your eyes and Steve stepped forward, taking you in his arms. You clung to him, putting your face in his thick shoulder as he gently stroked your hair. 

“Easy. Take it easy, sweet girl.”

You shook your head, giving a shaky exhale. 

“I can’t sleep. I keep having these horrible dreams about someone breaking in and—“

You swallowed and Steve leaned his head against yours. 

“No one’s going to be breaking in, sweetheart. Not with all the reinforcements and bells and whistles Bucky’s added to this place.” “Really?” “Really. You and Ollie are just about the safest people on the planet right now.”

You put your face back in his shoulder and Steve smiled as he rubbed your back. You sighed as you stepped back from him, pushing a hand through your hair. You turned to look at the clock above your desk, then smiled at Steve. 

“Ollie will be home soon.” “Does he have any after-school activities?”

You nodded. 

“He does soccer and he wants to play baseball, he keeps telling me.”

You shook your head, and Steve smiled. 

“I’ll see if I can find a couple gloves, see what the kid’s made of.”

You rolled your eyes. 

“Go easy on my baby, Rogers.”

Steve laughed, the two of you turning as Ollie came running into your room. 

“Hey, Mama! Look what I found!”

The smile slid from your face when he held out the bouquet of blood red roses. Steve must have seen the color fade from your face, because he stealthily grabbed a tissue from the box on your desk and took the vase from Ollie as he spoke. 

“Where’d you find these, buddy?” “Outside by the gate. Did you know there’s a security guard out there now? He’s a big guy, told me his name was Dugan.”

Ollie shook his head as he walked to the chair you’d collapsed into. 

“What kind of a name is Dugan, Mom?” “It’s his last name, bud. He was in the Army with me and Bucky and your uncle.”

Ollie looked back to Steve, hazel eyes going wide. 

“You know him, Steve?” “I do. And he’s not as cool as he’s trying to make you think he is.”

Ollie giggled, and you lifted a shaking hand to brush over his head. He smiled at you, and Steve cleared his throat. 

“O-man, did you see anybody around these flowers?”

Ollie shook his head. 

“No, the flowers were just sitting by the gate. There wasn’t anybody around.”

Steve nodded, and you met his eyes. He smiled at you, motioning towards the door. 

“Come on, bud. Let’s go see what Uncle Clint’s up to.”

Ollie nodded, waving a hand behind him as he ran to Steve. 

“Bye, Mom!”

When the door clicked shut behind them, you leaned forward, putting your head in your hands. A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door a second before Bucky walked in.

“Are you okay?” “They’re from him, aren’t they? The—the roses. He always sends roses.”

You stood up from your desk, walking around it and shaking your head. Bucky stepped in front of you, closing the door behind him, watching as you paced the room, wringing your hands. 

“Was there a card? Sometimes he sends a card. Sometimes it comes a few days later, in the mail.” “Y/N.”

You stopped, turning to face him. He gently tilted his head, and you felt your bottom lip tremble before you burst into tears. Bucky was in front of you before you could take in a breath, wrapping you into his arms. You clung to him, digging your fingers into his back and crying into his shoulder, shaking your head as you choked out the words. 

“I’m so scared. None of this matters, because he—“ “Shh, listen to me, listen. I’m not going to let anything happen to you. Do you hear me?” “You can’t promise—“ “I can. I am doing everything in my power to keep you safe, and I’m not going to let him touch you.”

You put your face in Bucky’s shoulder, and he tightened his grip around you, gently rubbing a hand down your back.

NEXT: CHAPTER THREE

TAGS: @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan, @captain-rogers-beard, @i-have-no-life-charlie, @jillybeaner13, @notyourtypicalrose, @sea040561, @fallenoutofrose, @geeksareunique, @distractedgemini, @buckybarneshairpullingkink, @isaxhorror, @scentedsongrebel, @paige-sais-rawr, @beardburnsupersoldiers, @absolukeyrh​, @elatedmarvel​, @shadowsof-thenight​, @sarcasm-myfriend​, @our-marvel-universe​, @shinycupcakebaker​

[the-real-beeash]

Having been in a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship, rewatching Breaking Bad has shown me that Skyler is not the bad guy. She's done some bad things, but she's human and humans have their flaws. Watching Walter abuse her by means of manipulating everyone around her in his favor is hard because I know what that is like. But it brings the show into perspective. Walter is not a protagonist. He's the antagonist of the story, even though the story primarily follows him. It is Walter's origin story as a villain. And as sick as some of the manipulation scenes make me, I love the story. Not because of Walter, but because of the people around him. All of them are flawed and human, with their hearts set in varying places, but they all try to do the best they can with the circumstances, and they make mistakes. None of them are glorified as perfect people, and in a world where you're perfect or you're scum, its refreshing to see something that doesn't follow those strict guidelines. But as a victim of abuse, I hate that the story ended up with a following that interprets this tale of Walter's abuses of other people in a light that Walter did all of these things to protect and provide for his family. But he didn't- the story starts that way, but that part ends a lot faster than people seem to want to realize. Because despite his eventual admission that he did it because he wanted to, it was long before that that it stopped being about the good of his family. It stopped being about the family well before the episode he breaks into the house through the crawlspace- which, I may add, is an episode that highlights some of his many transgressions against Skyler as her abuser. He knows he isn't welcome there, although his name is still on the title, but Skyler changing the locks was CLEARLY a boundary he was not meant to cross. When she tried to get him to leave and he refused resulting in the police being called, he made a show of being the doting father and dismissing Skyler's feelings to these officers. And this show of his helped turn her son on her in front of these officers, and in the end she had to be a prisoner in her own home.

Not only this, but he uses cars to win over his son and keep his allegiance, he tells Marie about Skyler's affair with Ted to keep Marie from trying to further communicate about the problem with her sister (isolation from loved ones), and Walt steps in as her only companion in the world despite knowing she wants nothing more to do with him, essentially forcing his presence in her life against her will.

And that's not everything he's done to her, but it's my major points as to why Skyler shouldn't be seen as just the bitch wife while Walter is not seen as an abuser.

And if you still don't believe Walter White is abusive, rewatch the show. Really think about what it feels like to be the other characters not knowing what you do about Walter's inner workings. To be Jesse thinking that it's his fault Brock got poisoned and questioning Walter, who knows damn well that he poisoned that little boy- Walter, who then proceeds to manipulate Jesse to place the blame with someone else that has, to this point, tried to be perfectly reasonable with Walter only to have Walter shit all over him multiple times and left him to try to keep it together. And on that note, Do Not get me started on everything he put Jesse through. He may have saved his life at the end, but that doesn't mean Jesse is without his damage from Walter's grasp. Jesus don't get me started with Jesse.

Walter White is an abuser, period. And I know this is years after that tale concluded but I don't want people to forget this crucial point to Walter's character arc. He's not the hero. He's a master manipulator and that isn't something you folks should idolize, cause one day you may meet one in real life and they will crush your soul for their own personal gain. And I wouldn't wish that on anybody.