#jelly weasel

[endermen-impasta]

Fanart for Jelly (A separate post)

Can we be friends too 🥹

@onejellyfishplease

[weaselishmcdiesel]

Unimportant but I see that cat of the year thing going around with a screenshot of the op of the poll bashing jellie. If you do one lick of research you’d find the op apologized for it. I really hope no one is sending them hate or whatever over this please relax it’s just an internet poll

[endermen-impasta]

I can just carry them :D

*holds you in the palm of my hand*

HI! :D

[unhingedromione]

Aside from Luna, Ron is the hardest HP character to capture in fic. Anyone can be intelligent (that's why so many writers gravitate to Hermione) but genuinely funny people are much rarer. Book smarts is plastic, it's everywhere; wit, on the other hand, is a precious metal. Even Ron stans struggle with getting his voice right. I could write Hermione in my sleep, but nailing Ron's quips and comebacks often requires careful thought and precision.

QED Ron bashers are just jelly they ain't as funny as The Weasel King.

[woncheolisms]

You're such a good writer!!! Your latest Seungcheol fic got me straight in the feels. I was hoping you could write cheol and s/o in the gym together having a little friendly competition but they're both competitive as hell so things get steamy in the end. Thank you!!

sweaty. (choi seungcheol x reader)

word count: 1260

warnings: smut, nsfw, unprotected sex, established relationship, seungcheol is very competitive, wall sex, choking if you squint

taglist is open! just send me an ask

buy me a coffee?

“How much do you wanna bet I can do the stairmaster longer than you?”

A teasing eyebrow raise and an accompanying smirk. “You’re joking, right?”

You pretend to contemplate as you re-tie your shoe. Behind you, your boyfriend shifts. You know he’s still looking at you. So you take your sweet time before responding, just to tick him off.

“All you did on Tuesday was cry about how tough the stairmaster is.” You goad him, recalling your last visit to the gym with him. “So I’m pretty sure I can stay on it longer than you can.”

You stand up straight and turn to look at him.

Choi Seungcheol is staring right back, clad in an oversized sweatshirt and loose shorts. You can see a dent in his cheek where he is biting on the inside of it. Oh, you’ve got him. He’s too competitive for his own good. And as soon as you imply in any way that he can’t do something, he immediately feels the need to prove that he can.

You nearly snort. He’s so easy.

“What are the terms?”

“Loser buys dinner.”

“Deal.”

Fifteen minutes later, you are panting like a dog all over the machine, hands clinging to the railing like claws, trying not to keel over and die. Seungcheol is faring better than you, though not by much, but his stubborn streak and ego are pushing him through, and in hindsight you regret making a deal in the first place, knowing how he reacts to a challenge. Dammit. Maybe you are just as competitive as him.

“Listen,” you finally wheeze out. “If we both stop together, we can forget the whole thing.”

Seungcheol barks out a breathless laugh, eyes shining despite how exhausted he looks. His hair clings to his forehead and the back of his neck. “Not a chance!”

You groan loudly, knowing you’ve lost. You can’t do this. Your legs feel like jelly. There’s no way you can keep going. But this also means Seungcheol has won. God, you won’t live this down.

“Fine.” You manage to grit out. “Your win.”

Seungcheol immediately steps off with a whoop, pumping his fist a bit. You collapse on the wooden floor, trying to catch your breath. Sweat rolls down your back, and your body feels like it’s on fire.

A few feet away, Seungcheol pulls his giant sweatshirt over his head, leaving him in a thin tank top. He crumples the cloth and throws it on the bench before sitting down heavily next to it, reaching for his water bottle.

Oh.

He is nearly basting in sweat. The entirety of his shirt clinging to his back and sides. His pale skin shines under the harsh lights of the gym, the dewy glow shifting as his biceps flex. His cheeks are beautifully flushed. He pushes his hair off his forehead, making it stick up a bit as he uses a small towel to wipe his face and the back of his neck. The silver chain he is wearing glints along with his skin. You gulp.

You know your boyfriend is a specimen. You know that. Doesn’t make being around him any easier. The need to constantly jump his bones has been there since before your relationship began, and it seems it has no intention of going away. But here, in the gym where he is often thinly clad, sweating, breathing heavily, grunting as he lifts weights, that need lights a fire under you. And there’s only one person who can put it out.

Good thing he has never been able to say no to you.

With almost renewed energy, you push yourself up on your feet and make a beeline for him. He sets his water bottle down, sending you a teasing smile and wiggling his eyebrows.

“I’m not letting you weasel your way out of this. We’re going all out for dinner.”

You hum, stepping between his parted knees. He instinctively reaching for your hips, runs his hands up the sides of your legs, kneading on them slightly as you brush your fingers over his shoulders.

“We might have to delay dinner a bit, babe. I have other things to do.”

A confused look. “What things?”

“You.”

He lets out a hearty laugh, not at all surprised at your raunchy words. This is nothing new to him. Nearly every gym session ends with both of you on the floor, or against the full length mirror in the room, or in the shower. One of the many benefits of having a gym at home is not worrying at all about anyone interrupting you two in your many steamy activities.

Once your lips meet Seungcheol’s, he hums in approval, craning his neck up to let you feel him easily. His hands travel from your legs to your ass, squeezing before slinking up further under your shirt. Once you push into him more, he stands up, now leaning down to continue nipping and biting at your lips, while also hooking his thumbs into the hem of your shorts and pulling them down along with your panties. This would be rushed. Hard. Short, quick strokes to quell the flame now burning inside you both.

He takes the lead immediately, pushing you into the wall behind him and pressing himself tight into you as he fumbles with his own shorts, just enough to free himself. His knee knocks against the back of your thigh, wedging between it to push your legs apart, and then you feel pressure, his thick cock carving its way into you. Your mouth drops and you moan shamelessly, arching deeper to make more room for him. He groans appreciatively when he bottoms out, hand squeezing hard at your bare hip. Your knees are trembling, but now for a different reason than ten minutes ago.

He doesn’t start slow, hips snapping back and forth quickly. You try to catch your breath, try to keep up with his pace, but it’s almost impossible. It always is with him. But it’s just the way you like it. And you let him know.

“Cheol.” You gasp out, already feeling your core tighten and your brain turn to mush as he presses into your most sensitive spot, one that he is intimately familiar with. “Feels so good.”

“This what you wanted?” He grunts out, voice an octave lower and jolting under the weight of his movements. His right hand slides up, wrapping around your neck and thumbing at your jaw to tilt your head towards him. His lips press into yours with bruising intensity. Inside your gym shoes, you can feel your toes curl.

It’s not long before you are teetering on the brink of orgasm, sobbing and mumbling incoherently while Seungcheol breathes heavily behind you, moaning into your shoulder as he pounds hard into you, and when his fingers meet your desperate, needy clit, it takes only a few harsh rubs to send you over the edge.

You feel him flood your insides with warmth as you tremble your way through your own high, scrambling for purchase against the wall and finding none. Your eyelids feel heavy almost instantly as you come down, your limbs buzzing. You whine as he pulls out, and he shushes you, running a gentle hand over your waist and hips. A soft kiss brushes against your sweaty temple. You sigh in contentment as silence stretches over both of you, Seungcheol’s weight a gentle comfort on your back. Then his words break through the quiet.

“So, about dinner..”

You barely hold back a laugh.

[askdacast]

hey block people fans, so I really love the Tanuki Joel/Smallishbeans fanart goin around as inspired by @mellozheist's design and it made me think, what youkai (Japanese folklore monsters) would we portray the other Hermitcraft/Life Series members as? Some of the more obvious and fun ideas I thought of:

Scar - Kitsune, easy. Charismatic, cunning wiles, enterprising, known for tricking people, tendency to be wet cat on the rare instance you find his weakness. Also kitsune are rivals to tanuki (although Scar and Joel aren't really rivals so much as occasional partners in crime). You could alternatively choose the bakeneko because it's also a wiley shapeshifter and cat connection (RIP Jellie).

Grian - Tengu, also easy choice. Not just for the obvious pesky bird connection. Tengu are also trickster beings. They are sometimes evil (abducting humans) but sometimes benign and teach humans secret arts. They are excellent fighters and leaders, but just like a regular crow, they can just as easily goof off for no reason at all. Dangerously capable but also goofy bird fits Grian to a T.

Mumbo - Kappa, maybe? He's not associated with water much iirc but the kappa from not iRL folklore but a certain series are associated with engineering, and I needed an appropriate one for the Redstoners lol

Etho - Kamaitachi. Weasel with sharp blades. Like a tanuki (Joel), but consistently sneaky, while also being just a little guy. Can probably team up with Skizzle and Tango for the traditional trio of sneaky people with sharp blades. EDIT: I know there's fanart of him as a kitsune to match Tanuki Joel, and I'm by no means contesting that, this is just a fun alternative.

Cleo - Yamauba/Yamanba. I'M NOT CALLING CLEO AN OLD HAG, LET ME EXPLAIN. DANGEROUSLY FIERCE AND INTELLIGENT WITCH WHO LIVES IN THE MOUNTAINS AND IS JUST AS PROTECTIVE OF HER (potentially foster) CHILDREN AS MUCH AS SHE IS A TERROR TO THOSE WHO CROSS HER.

Bdubs/Skizzleman - Oni. They beeg. They angery. They not necessarily dumb but they stronk and one of them has lived in the mountains at least once. I can even see Bdubs being like a Sakata Kintoki spoof (the "son" of a yamanba a.k.a Cleo)

Jimmy - Yosuzume. Birds of bad luck. Canary curse. Need I explain more?

feel free to give alternative suggestions or ideas for the others, or ask me what youkai I think might fit certain traits, I may not know much about the block people but I know a little too much about Japanese folklore so this is just a fun exercise for me

[boss-poss]

See, Lethal Company's real genius is that it somehow marries two normally opposed genres, those being horror and comedy together into something greater. Mechanically it's a multiplayer looter extraction survival type game. It's designed to create stressful and scary situations by forcing you to speedrun mini randomized dungeons while monsters hunt your character to meet a certain quota (our asses are not making quota). That's not the clever part though, no, that's giving the players the ability to fuck themselves over and the hilarity that comes from it.

Anything you say into your mic is said in the game world and can be heard by certain monsters. Many items, similarly, can be used to make noise and you can bet there is little impulse control when a player finds an air horn or gets a walkie talkie. The sound of a distant honk somewhere out of nowhere is not something most players are prepared for while in a pitch black maze. Sound in this game has a doppler effect, which makes it harder to hear the further away the source is, allowing screams to fade into nothing and unintelligible yelling heard for a second before vanishing. You must rely on your senses but those are, by design, limited and regularly tricked.

Because level layouts, monster locations, and item spawns are all random, it's insanely easy to get lost or lose track of thigs, especially in the dark and especially when panicking. Seeing a bracken for the first time will almost certainly send a player running in the opposite direction and get lost, if they even see it all. No one is prepared to have a hand wrap around their face and snap their neck in an instant. It's utterly shocking and will leave you gasping in surprise to first time you experience it.

Certain weather patterns make levels harder, some even nearly impossible (looking at you eclipse), and sometimes your options are avoiding deadly lightning or not being able to see due to fog. High level moons have excessively valuable loot but also feature the worst foes and cost a fee to access, forcing a compromise between greed, ability, and resources.

Dying, likewise incurs a penalties. Your team is fined for dying and not bringing the bodies back but if you all die, all your collected loot goes poof. Gone. A team wipe can and will effectively end the run in an instant if you do something stupid like stick around when you hear "pop goes the weasel" or try to pick up that funny looking roomba. You can almost feel the pressure weighing down on your shoulders when you realize you're the last one left and you need to get back to the ship or miss the quota.

The monsters likewise, are engines of terror that are comically effective killing machines with no cohesive theme to help anticipate them. The already mentioned bracken is one of the scariest things I've seen in a game, and those technically aren't even that bad. They're completely manageable if you keep your head on a swivel and pay attention to your surroundings. Coilheads are these mannequins with bobble heads that will path to and kill you in a microsecond the moment you aren't looking at them, weeping angel style. There's a thing called the ghost girl that I have yet to see but is apparently one of the most terrifying critters in the menagerie. Forest giants. If you know, you know.

All these little mechanics, these choices that are made by and for the player, create a maelstrom of unpredictable chaos that, like a buxom blond transforming into an orgasming pooltoy, turns what would be strictly serious horror into a unique form of dark comedy that layers over it like jelly on peanut butter. You are scared, you are on edge, and it only gets worse when you know what these things are capable of, but the sheer hopelessness is something you all have in common. It's funny how little hope you have. You will die. A monster will wipe your team. There will eventually come a quota you can't beat. You were doomed from the start.

So why not get silly with it? Why not try to fight that bracken with shovel? Fuck him. Why not just run past a turret and try to nab that fat jar of pickles? Why not wander off from the group? You're just as likely to come back with arms loaded and the quota met as you are likely to not come back at all. You're already dead, so take the gamble, do stupid shit, repeat this hell until you can meet its horrors with grim determination and put in the effort to afford that goddamn boombox. Dance. Just press 1 and dance the fear away.

You are all united in your mortality and duty, fragile sacks of flesh working to break even at the behest of perhaps the greatest horror of all: The company you work for. You are so preposterously fucked beyond all belief from every angle there really isn't enough adjectives to describe it. And that's comedy baby, when things are so bad all you can do is laugh.

[some-zer0]

AKA Lydia describing Sasha's sneakiness for 6 minutes and 44 seconds

(Written-out descriptions and episode numbers under the cut)

Like black paint in a gravity well (RQG 6)

Description runs off her like water off a sort of unobtrusive duck (RQG 0)

I turn myself into a strange shape that fits the available space like water in a puddle (RQG 2)

Like a cat in a tar pit (RQG 6)

Like ball bearings that have fallen out of a blow-up ball bearing factory that was built on a slight slope (RQG 7)

Like a spilled bottle of extra virgin olive oil . . . over the back of a silken seal . . . The seal quivers in delight. Give it a massage (RQG 8)

Like a weasel through a hamster city toy set (RQG 8)

I look like black paint. On the wall. Slightly smeared (RQG 8)

I melt into the stone like mold on a cake (RQG 12)

I sorta flow back into a nonchalant position like, I don't know, uh, oil down a hill into a jelly mold that is shaped like something extremely cool (RQG 17)

Like ball bearings that have erupted from a truck that crashed on a slight slope (RQG 20)

Like cyanide in an almond mix from Sainsbury's that you might give to some people that you don't like (RQG 23)

Like ball bearings made out of mist, flowing down into a valley which is very peaceful and nice. And made of mist. It's a valley of mist. That you can see -- in this metaphor -- some really beautiful trees. Like, it's late autumn so... And sometimes there's a hoot of an owl cause it's kinda dawn . . . [ad break] . . . And the trout are swimming gently through the beautiful- It's like a mirage of kind of an English country... And there's a fisherman there, and he's asleep (RQG 26)

Like an elegant seagull, but stronger. Like a porpoise! Like an orca! (RQG 32)

I'm hidden behind a dust mote, floating up the stairs. The other dust motes are freaked out by how quiet it's gotten (RQG 37)

I flow like the water. I am an eel, in a muddy swamp. This is my natural home! (RQG 42)

[I] slide out like a baby seal (RQG 42)

[Sasha's movement speed is] as quick as oiled ball bearings, falling vertically down a hole where the air's been taken out so that it's like a vacuum (RQG 47)

She would usually flow through his grasp, like the ghost of ball bearings past (RQG 49)

It's like the ball bearings have got the traces of stuff from the tape that we use to keep the mics in place, so it's sorta like just slightly- the gray- the gray- like the gluey bit when it's been peeled off. It's sticky, I don't like it (RQG 57)

I fade into the background like a- like a really well-camouflaged owl... in... an... oily night. OooOOOoooh (Metacast 7)

Not about Sasha but said by Lydia // Like a shadow that's been massaged with incredibly thick, high-quality oil by a magical masseuse, so that all of the kinks are completely knocked out and it's just- flows like easy summer Sundays (RQG 36)

Too much over-talk for me to write out // He's really captured your essence by not describing you at all (RQG 41)

[vulpisnocturna]

My deary. I see you are back (hopefully somewhat better), but I need you bad as ever!

Yes I totally ripped that from a song, but it’s literally what came to mind.

Been thinking *a lot,* per usual. About all the Uchiha men in my life. You know me, biggest Shisui slut to have scorched this planet. Anyways, if you’re feeling it, it doesn’t necessarily have to be Shisui—can be Itachi. Or whatever.

Wildcard list of hc for these men. Things that they didn’t realize were arousing, but then when they see you do them—it just tightens the slacks a bit. Probably something they should feel ashamed about but don’t.

And in all honesty if your not feeling it, then I totally appreciate you reading my wild whims. Or if something else, because creative freedom is always appreciated from my favs here, do something else.

I just really crave this man, and your writing of him. I eat the words your fingertips formulate like a rabid beast.

Sincerely,

Me 🙂❤️❤️

My darling! Let me see what I can cook.

Shisui - Itachi secret turn ons (?) 🫶🏻

Shisui

- puns. I think Shisui would be the type of guy who sees you make a stupid dad joke or pun and he is like

- red lipstick. I don’t know why, it just makes his knees jelly and something else quite… hard.

-sassiness. It makes him smile, especially if you’re quite a bit shorter than him, he thinks it’s cute.

Itachi

- I think Weasel Boy is into thigh high socks (me too tbh). I think he would stare like he’s trying to X-ray your legs if you wore thigh high socks

- Smiles. Your smiles to him are extremely sweet and also uplifting. And yes, they turn him on. One, because you’re smiling at him and his heart is going crazy knowing he made you happy, two because there’s so much cruelty in the world and you look so radiant and you’re his light. He’ll gift you a little smile of his own 🥹

- If you read to him 🥺 especially when he’s blind AF. He is going to be so in love with that stuff. Bonus points (and probably Itachi going feral) if you brush his hair while you read to him. Itachi when Reader does these things:

[endermen-impasta]

Sona Ref Sheet (pt2)

((height ref character was made by @onejellyfishplease go support them and their works ))

[taldigi]

Yosuke and Rise should need out about music. I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them starts the convo to make yu jelly since he’s not romancing either of them but he could be, except also they should be so on the same wavelength that they can’t sully it with teenage romance politics

I like the idea of Rise being on team Souyo if she can't have Yu. All the fics I've read with that in it are so cute ;w; If anybody can weasel feelings out of those boys it would probably be her.

But yeah they really connect over music and dance. They've got a really excellent potential chemistry (outside the fanboy element) where I can see Yosk being really good at being her manager or at least a co-songwriter.

The fact that it makes Yu jealous is just a nice bonus. She hooks his arm in Yosuke's and then makes direct eye contact with Yu.

[tunastime]

A Minute in the Morning

so I started playing pokemon legends arceus. crumples to the ground. (2762 words)

In a hazy, rusty morning light, Ingo wakes up.

It’s a slow start—like his office computer, taking a whole ten minutes to finish booting, enough to stir sugar into his morning coffee and dissect his breakfast sandwich into parts. It feels like it takes just about that much time for Ingo to become aware of where he’s lying, which is in bed. Which is not where he fell asleep to begin with, which means that someone lifted him to bed and tucked him in. Which was rather sweet. Because he’s burrowed into the covers like a happy drilbur, keeping the cold from his fingers and toes and nose. He finally blinks his eyes open, and it’s sunrise that fills his room. Not his room. Scratch that. Emmet’s room. No wonder the blankets are so much lighter than he remembers them being. Nevertheless. Happy drilbur. He weasels a little more into the pillow. From either side of him, something moves. It’s slight, if there, but as he cranes his neck, slow and careful, he can see a dark head of hair on one side, and silver-white on the other. 

Ingo’s heart swells a fraction too big and too warm for his chest as he sighs out.

Elesa and Emmet haven’t woken up yet, which is a plus. If he were to move too much and move them he might lose the warmth from either side. Elesa’s shoulder rests against the crest of his back, and Emmet’s holding onto his elbow with one hand. The grip is loose at best, but the warmth, both from shoulder to spine and hand to elbow, seeps through him.

It’s blurry. Just everything. It kind of mushes together in his brain, like jam. Or maybe jelly. It doesn’t really matter. If he thinks too hard, his stomach starts to twist in knots, and he’d rather not feel sick while he’s trying to enjoy his morning. He remembers falling asleep while the television played the night prior—nighttime skits and commercials he filtered out until Emmet’s shoulder became the comfiest thing. He supposes that sometime between that point, and the point which he’s just woken up, Elesa came in, and at some other point, he was carted off to bed. It’s nice, though. The blankets make just enough weight over him to soothe ache and anxiety, and it’s warm, and he’s mostly thinking about how nice a cup of coffee sounds right now. Maybe a latte. Something warm. He shuts his eyes again.

The light is surprisingly yellower when he wakes up again. There’s still a warm weight on both sides of him, but it feels different than before. It stretches over him, too, more than just the weighted blanket that’s been added on top of him. He peeks an eye open to find Eelektross slumped over him, his large head curled near Ingo’s shoulder and his similarly large eyes shut as he snores. Ingo snorts, trying to shift to his back with the weight over him, without waking Eelektross. He does after a moment, settling once again, only for Eelektross to huff and fix one, tired eye on his face. Ingo smiles, just a little.

Wriggling a hand free, he pats Eelektross’ forehead, a path well pet and well loved.

“Good morning, you gigantic eel.”

Eelektross trills, nuzzling into Ingo’s hand.

“Mm, yes,” Ingo says. “I’m sure that definitely did not alert Emmet that I am awake, meaning I can’t fake any more sleep. Thank you Eelektross.”

The eel gives a happy sniff.

Ingo snorts.

Typical.

The door cracks open a moment later, the wide eyes of his brother peeking through. He raises his eyebrows, looking over Ingo and Eelektross still in bed. It comes with a little head tilt, something Ingo knows is indicative of an Emmet with a question.

“Sleep well?” he asks. Ingo nods.

“I think so,” he says. “I didn’t realize I’d be carried to bed when I fell asleep.”

“Ah!” Emmet says, eyebrows raising. “I made sure you stayed asleep when we carried you in. You’re a very deep sleeper when you want to be.”

It’s getting better, the gaps in his memory. It’s not enough to trust himself to start his duties as a Subway Boss again, but it's enough to have a few doctor’s appointments and to speak with police and his boss and their coworkers. He’s remembered their pokemon, which is why Eelektross didn’t startle him. And he’s remembered enough for him to fall asleep on Emmet’s shoulder with no care in the world. Enough for life to begin to settle from the chaos. Today is Tuesday, which means Emmet has the day off, and Ingo can tell, even as he reaches to wipe sleep from his eyes, that Emmet is still in his pajamas. He opens the door a little wider, leaning against the doorframe. 

“Ah,” Ingo echoes. “Was it Elesa’s idea to sleep in your room rather than my own?”

“It was,” Emmet concedes, smiling. “But I am Emmet, and I make a very good pillow.”

“You are Emmet and you are a very clingy sleeper,” Ingo says, letting his eyes shut again. Emmet makes a startled noise.

“Go-Go, don’t fall asleep again,” he yaps. “Your breakfast will get cold.”

Slowly, Ingo opens one eye, looking at his brother in the doorway. Eelektross snuffs into his shoulder, wriggling off of him. He grunts as the eel’s weight shifts off, leaving him free, but cooler.

“What’s for breakfast?” he says, watching Eelektross wriggle off the bed and toward Emmet. Emmet opens the door a bit further, takes a step back, and hefts the eel into his arms, knees bending with the weight. Ingo watches Emmet giggle to himself, shifting Eelektross in his arms to better wrap around his neck and arms, weight heavy against him. Clearly.

“Pancakes,” Emmet huffs. He’s still smiling, something almost infectious.

“Alright,” Ingo sighs.

“I also cut some fruit.”

“I’m getting up,” Ingo grumbles, rolling onto his side before he peels himself up and into a sit.

“I think Elesa left her nice coffee creamer, also.”

“I’m already up, Em,” Ingo snorts, trying not to laugh. “You don’t have to convince me.”

Emmet laughs again.

“Just adding!” he says cheerily, wobbling off toward the living room. In the open doorway, Ingo can see the sprawl of their living room and kitchen, lit by yellow daylight. Ingo sighs, stretching his arms above his head, twisting around. When the room settles, he stands, and he realizes that the room is warm around him. Emmet must’ve turned the heat on, and it must actually be working. He hums as he combs his hair back, wandering into the bathroom to wash his face.

When he finally makes it to the kitchen table, Emmet is sitting at the table, scrolling on his x-transceiver. He’s changed into a cream-colored, high collared sweater, his hair held back with a small headband. Eelektross is lying across the couch, head resting on the arm. There’s a plate of pancakes sitting in front of Ingo’s seat at the table, and a half-eaten plate in front of Emmet. He looks up as Ingo sits, raising his eyebrows.

“Good morning,” Emmet says. He nudges a cup of coffee toward Ingo. It’s a light brown color—likely the way that Ingo likes it. It helps they like their plain coffee the same way. If it were any other type of coffee, Ingo’s certain there would be some big disagreement—type of milk and way of prep and iced versus hot. But Ingo takes a long sip of hot coffee and nearly sighs in relief. Whatever fancy creamer Elesa buys really does make a plain cup of coffee so much better. He sits, nudging Emmet with his foot under the table.

“What are you reading?” he asks, gesturing with his fork to Emmet’s phone. Emmet holds it up.

“Article on a new electric rail system in Galar.” 

Ingo tilts his head, nodding along.

“Interesting. Any good?”

“Very efficient,” Emmet says, nodding along. He eventually pulls back, setting his phone face down on the table and returning to his pancakes. He takes a large bite, and through it, says:

“Maybe Gear Station should get some upgrades.”

Ingo snorts.

“We’re already quite efficient,” he says. “Do you think our trains could be quicker? Easier to board?”

Emmet shrugs.

“Wishful thinking. They’re already automatically driven, so there isn’t much more, but maybe longer cars to hold more passengers. Our trains are quite small.”

“Sounds expensive,” Ingo says, drinking his coffee. He pulls apart his stack of pancakes, poking at them with his fork.

“Maybe they’ve already got an upgrade in the works,” Emmet says. “It’s been a while since we’ve had an all-staff meeting. Perhaps we should inform the director.”

“Especially since I’ve returned and have about three years to catch up on, mm?”

Emmet smiles. It’s a bit tight, though. Ingo glances away, biting into his tongue. Should’ve kept that thought to himself.

“Maybe you’re right,” he says. “Though I promise you that not much has changed in the last three years.”

Ingo hums. He believes it, that nothing much has shifted. It’s hard to say, obviously, considering he wasn’t there to see it for himself, but his brother was never the type to lie without a reason, and this certainly didn’t have a good one. He takes a large bite of pancake and finds them still warm. It’s a quiet breakfast, between pancakes and coffee and Galvantula sleeping underneath the table. Emmet eventually finishes his food, shoveling large bites of pancake into his mouth as quickly as he can. Ingo watches him swallow with surprising difficulty, reaching for his cup of coffee. It takes a moment for Ingo to stomach the rest of his pancakes. Having this much food is a luxury he had not often afforded a month prior. His stomach still wasn’t used to it.

“Where is Elesa?” Ingo asks after a beat. Emmet talks through a mouthful of pancake and strawberry and maple syrup. 

“Mm, she had four battle appointments today, but she’ll be back around. Probably before two.”

Emmet is the first to finish, setting all his dishes together as he stands. He moves around Ingo as Ingo finishes, collecting dishes and setting everything in the sink. As Ingo stands to pass him his plate, he asks:

“Did you have a plan today?

“Mm?” Emmet hums. “No, not particularly. Why? Is there something you wanted to do?”

Ingo frowns, face pulling.

“Well,” he starts. “I was thinking—”

“Ah,” Emmet interjects. “Your first mistake—”

“I was thinking,” Ingo continues, narrowing his eyes. “That it might be a good idea for us to visit Elesa. I need to ask her for a new coat.”

“Mm!” Emmet startles, turning toward him. His face brightens. “That’s right! You do need a new coat. Good thing she’ll be over later, mm?”

Ingo nods. He fetches his coffee mug, pouring another cup of black coffee to balance the sweetened dregs. He leans back against the counter right as Emmet goes to hand him a dish to put away. They work in tandem for a moment, pausing as Ingo works to finish his coffee.

It’s a slow morning, 8:45am, and Ingo gazes back at his bed with longing.

It’s just. When’s the last time he had such a good sleep, right? On a bed that soft? He’d gotten so used to tatami mats and the grass and canvas laid out on the ground and here was a bed, with thick fluffy blankets and several large pillows and another person taking up space. It was very—stop it, Ingo—it’s comfortable. He hands Emmet his coffee mug.

“Ingo,” Emmet says.

Ingo hums. His eyes have drifted to the couch. Maybe standing is a little hard today. He should sit, shouldn’t he?

“Is my brother still up there?” Emmet asks, tapping Ingo’s head. Ingo startles as he does, turning to him.

“I would hope so,” he says. “Otherwise I don’t know where I’d be.”

“Not here, obviously” Emmet says. He finishes rinsing Ingo’s mug, setting it top down on the drying mat. “Though I’m not entirely sure you’re all there right now, are you?”

“Trying,” Ingo hums. “Too much going on.”

Emmet hums, a bit of a laugh showing through.

“You look like you’re about to fall over.”

“I won’t,” Ingo promises.

“I don’t believe you,” Emmet says, shutting off the sink. The clean dishes sit on the rack, dripping water. Emmet wipes his hands with a dish towel. “You know, you should be resting if your engine isn’t working at full capacity. Rest is very important”

“Can’t be a well oiled machine with nowhere to go,” Ingo says, folding his arms. “I don’t understand why I don’t have the energy to move anymore.”

“Does the why matter?” Emmet asks. He’s leaning against the counter now, a mirror to Ingo, like he often was to Emmet. It was a natural progression—one following after the other, a mirror, a shadow, a doppleganger.

“It matters a little,” Ingo shrugs. “It matters to me. It gives me a reason.”

“Your reason is that you’ve gone through a lot,” Emmet says, pushing away from the counter. He scoops up his x-transceiver from the table, moving around it and through the apartment as he talks. “Your reason is that your body is playing catch-up with the world around you.”

“Maybe,” Ingo huffs.

“I am Emmet,” says his brother. “I am tired. I don’t sleep well. Do you think it’s my fault that I’m tired and don’t sleep well?”

Ingo grits his teeth. He hates this part—ever since they were little, Emmet would flip this hypocritical card, showing Ingo exactly how stupid he was sounding. It was good, for the most part, because Emmet was right and next time Emmet did the same thing, Ingo could follow suit with that card. But it was so annoying watching it now, watching Emmet throw open the blinds and shimmy open the window for the fire escape. A tinged-cool spring breeze filters in through the open window, tossing the curtains aside. Emmet keeps moving as Ingo thinks, the gears in his head turning slowly, still dulled with sleep. 

“No,” Ingo says shortly, watching Emmet rearrange coasters on the coffee table, setting game controllers back into their docks. “I don’t think anything is your fault.”

“Well now you are just flattering me, Go-Go.”

“Don’t say that flattery never got anyone anywhere,” Ingo says, pointing at him, waving his finger. Emmet laughs.

“My point is,” he says, gesturing to the couch. “You’re allowed to rest. We can figure out the steps from there, right? Even if we’re sitting on the couch to do it.”

Ingo sighs, chewing on the inside of his cheek.

“Even if I fall asleep?”

Emmet nods, still smiling a little.

“I will wake you if you do.”

Ingo huffs out a laugh, feeling the edges of his mouth quirk up. As Emmet sits on the soft, corduroy couch, Ingo feels himself pulled forward, as if recalled, to sit beside him. He brings his knees up as he settles into his familiar spot between the back and arm of the couch. 

“Do you promise you’ll shake me awake?” Ingo says, leaning his head against the back of the couch. Emmet scrunches his nose.

“Yes,” he says, knocking his knuckles into Ingo’s knee. “I do. But I’m going to watch Alakazam! so you can think without my talking.”

Ingo nods. The television hums to life quietly in the background.

Emmet always watches Alakazam! at 9am. At least, when he can catch it. Ingo watches the last few minutes of the previous game show, something quiet and low despite the flash of colors and excited spread of energy. As the show starts, he watches Emmet’s face shift, that serious pull to his mouth and the furrow of his eyebrows that Ingo only sees when they’re battling. To see that spark again, not knowing how long it’s been gone, turns a question in Ingo’s mind.

“Emmet,” he says.

“Yes, I am Emmet,” Emmet says. “You are Ingo. What do you need?”

“I think I've got an idea of what I want to do today.”

Emmet turns his head a bit, looking at Ingo mostly out of the corner of his eye. His eyes flick back and forth between Ingo’s face and the television, waiting for his program to start.

“Mm?” Emmet asks. Ingo smiles a bit, a laugh stuck behind his teeth.

He sees the glint in Emmet’s eye before he even asks his question.

“What about a pokemon battle?”

[laughableomen]

Episode Breakdown: Heart eyes Q watches his husband save Space Jellies

Memorable moment: “You do remember what I taught you, Imzadi?” - I will die on this ship 🚢

“I consider it important for my key officers to know each other’s abilities” (Captain everyone is, or will be, fucking)🖖

Bonus points: Troi’s OG curls 👏

Protective of Data count: 3 (‘Pop goes the weasel’ -Will: I've only had ‘Data’ for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself".)

Queer count: 5 (Anything with Q in cannot be under a 5) “Temper, Temper mon capitaine”

(Season 1 eps 1 part2 )

[mafia-fish]

I don't want a lot for Christmas There is just one thing I need I don't care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree I just want you for my own More than you could ever know Make my wish come true All I want for Christmas is you Yeah

I don't want a lot for Christmas There is just one thing I need (and I) Don't care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree I don't need to hang my stocking there upon the fireplace Santa Claus won't make me happy with a toy on Christmas Day

I just want you for my own More than you could ever know Make my wish come true All I want for Christmas is you You, baby

Oh, I won't ask for much this Christmas I won't even wish for snow (and I) I'm just gonna keep on waiting underneath the mistletoe I won't make a list and send it to the North Pole for Saint Nick I won't even stay awake to hear those magic reindeer click

'Cause I just want you here tonight Holding on to me so tight What more can I do? Oh, baby, all I want for Christmas is you You, baby

Oh-oh, all the lights are shining so brightly everywhere (so brightly, baby) And the sound of children's laughter fills the air (oh, oh, yeah) And everyone is singing (oh, yeah) I hear those sleigh bells ringing Santa, won't you bring me the one I really need? (Yeah, oh) Won't you please bring my baby to me?

Oh, I don't want a lot for Christmas This is all I'm asking for I just wanna see my baby standing right outside my door

Oh, I just want you for my own More than you could ever know Make my wish come true Oh, baby, all I want for Christmas is you You, baby

All I want for Christmas is you, baby All I want for Christmas is you, baby All I want for Christmas is you, baby All I want for Christmas (all I really want) is you, baby All I want (I want) for Christmas (all I really want) is you, baby

COUNT YOUR DAYS YOU INSIGNIFICANT WORM THAT HAS SOMEHOW WEASELLED ITS WAY INTO MY SIGHT

YOUR BONE MARROW WILL BE EXTRACTED AND YOUR CARTILAGE WILL BE EATEN LIKE EXOTIC JELLY

YOUR REMAINS WILL BE COOKED IN AN EASY BAKE OVEN INTO PREPPY LORAX CUPCAKES AND SERVED AT A SNOTTY 8 YEAR OLD SEPHORA KIDS BIRTHDAY

YOUR REBIRTH WILL BE SLOW AND PAINFUL, NOT EVEN GOD WILL STOP YOUR SUFFERING

WELCOME TO FUCKING PURGATORY.

[serafilms]

just some of my fav content that kpop (boy) groups have put out (very specific!!!)

i spend many an hour on it (like actually just one hour) because i don’t want to work on my wips!!!

nct 127 hit the states: haechan x dallas

HAECHAN SILVER HAIR HAECHAN SILVER HAIR i will never shut up. this and purple and we go up brown/rainbow are his best looks idgaf. they’re just soo cute here and having so much fun and i can’t even believe how fun it looks :(( i wanna have a day like this

nct 127 hit the states: mark x vancouver

such a beautiful scenery and seeing mark be so happy in his hometown w the rest of 127 is so cute.

boynextdoor pretty u cover

SLAYED! nothing more to say. i love bnd performances they ate down period.

beomgyu kids’ café on workman

the editing is so funny in this video PLS and the way the little girls all hated him but the boys were obsessed with him 😭 the café staff are so fun and nice too 👍 i love beomgyu sm

nct dream candy mv

no explanation required. once you candy you never stop candying. the cutest music video EVER i love it so much. nct dream mv’s always EAT. hello future, we go up, chewing gum, go, life is still going on (track video but still cute), hot sauce

txt lo$er=lover office attack version

so creative and fun and they look so good 😋

nct dream rooftop fight

so glad they actually did this bc i was waiting for it for so long 😭 they hyped it up for so many years did NOT disappoint. nct will never not be funny.

stray kids fancy cover

THE WAY I ACTUALLY FORGOT THIS HAPPENED UNTIL JUST NOW WHEN I WAS GOING THROUGH MY YOUTUBE PLAYLIST. omg we moved on too soon

boynextdoor funnextdoor

i’m actually in the process of watching it rn but i’m actually so amazed at how genuine and funny they are?? usually a lot of groups (excluding survival show groups) take a while to warm up to the cameras and talk to them and be natural around them and their members in front of them, but you can really tell how comfortable bnd are with each other and even though they’re warming up the the cameras, they’re so cute about it and so natural and outgoing that it’s not awkward at all and so fun to watch! and on that note….

boynextdoor what? door!

they’re so funny omg also bc why are hybe editors so slay?? will never stop promoting bnd (+zb1!!! love riize too but they have sufficient hype tbh i need bnd appreciation!! 5th gen boy groups let’s gooooo)

zerobaseone zbtv

ok so this list actually isn’t specific anymore but can u blame me. they’re so funny in all of the episodes how am i to choose just one. zb1 are quite literally one of the absolute funniest groups I’ve ever seen. love them sm PLEASE stan before they disband 😞

eunchae star diary with sunghoon and heeseung

EUNCHAE !!!!! she’s so cute i love eunchae star diary 😭 this was more awkward than the jake ni-ki one tbh but it was really cute too 👍 and the way sunghoon kept trying to weasel out the tea from her like leave that girl alone hoon 😭😭

honourable mentions to the kyujin and hiyyih episodes too!! bc it’s so fun to see eunchae with her friends

en o’clock episode 12

the one where they did like the high up line training course thing idk what it’s called and they were wearing camo print like military ish stuff idk man but it’s so funny and their early days r so cute

en o’clock episodes 32 and 33

the irl among us episodes 😭😭

boys planet jelly pop

MY GODDDDDD JELLY POP ZHANG HAO I LOVE U SM. i wish he liked women and was 4 years younger and went to my uni. i purchased many zhang hao pc’s recently. jelly pop my #7 most played song in spotify. i watched it too many times. saved so many edits. ilysm king.

txt idol human theatre when they went to that house

the way the managers lifted taehyun out of the pool gets me every single time 😭😭😭

txt idol human theatre during blue hour era

my fav idol human theatre episode EVER. so funny and i love blue hour era sm‼️

stray kids family 3rd anniversary

skz with wigs will never not be iconic. and why did jeongin and felix lowkey devour acting elderly like???

to do x txt flying yoga episode 83

i love this episode so much actually omfg PLEASEE they’re so funny 😭 kpop idols doing any kind of strenuous movement exercise is my favourite content ever

to do x txt self defense episode 104

this one is CRIMINALLY underrated actually. wdym both parts don’t have 1 million views at least? can’t tell you how many times i had to rewind bc i was enjoying it so much 🫶🫶 i have plans to rewatch this soon so i also can learn some self defense moves.

run bts episode 55

this whole trip starts from ep 53 but them slapping each other’s asses and trying not to laugh is one of the funniest things i’ve ever watched actually,, this was one of the first run bts vids i watched on vlive and it brings me back when i see clips of it 😢

the nct show (nct 2020 but in 2022)

i love LOVE when nct all gets together :( nct 2018 and nct world 2.0 !!!! everything happens for a reason and sungchan and shotaro belong in riize but this video is so fun and they’re all so cute together!! field day episodes!!!!!! this and hybe game caterers fr

007” 00” the nct show

same as previous with extra emphasis on I LOVE THE 00 LINE HOKY FUCK. yangyang ❤️❤️❤️ i need to watch more wayv content i miss him

upper side dreamin’ halloween version behind the scenes

sunoo dancing to mama at the end is peak editing. enha vs ghosts let’s go!!! they’re all so cute and funny in this 🥳🥳 the way ni-ki abandoned the camera man bye 😭

txt magic island mv

words cannot express how much i miss the dream chapter: magic era. how i wish i could find a song that makes me feel the way run away and magic island do. the things i’d do to listen to that album for the first time omfg!!!! anyways this mv and the run away mv make me so emotional like 😭😭😭 also old bts txt lore used to be so confusing to me like i would spend soo so long trying to figure it out

anyways that’s it bc youtube search and sorting history filters are ass so i can’t find many more but i hope at least 1 person finds a new video to watch from this.

[cosmiicblink]

So I got in my car and I drove over to the donuts shop

And I walked on up to the guy behind the counter

And he says "Yeah, what do ya want?"

I said "You got any glazed donuts?"

He said "No, we're outta glazed donuts"

I said "Well, you got any jelly donuts?"

He said "No, we're outta jelly donuts"

I said "You got any Bavarian cream-filled donuts?"

He said "No, we're outta Bavarian cream-filled donuts"

I said “You got any carrot cake donuts?”

He said “No, we’re outta carrot cake donuts”

I said “You got any croissants?”

He said “No, we’re outta croissants”

I said “You got any powdered donuts?”

He said “No, we’re outta powdered donuts”

I said “You got any frosted donuts?”

He said “No, we’re outta frosted donuts”

I said "You got any cinnamon rolls?"

He said "No, we're outta cinnamon rolls"

I said “You got any strawberry donuts?”

He said “No, we’re outta strawberry donuts”

I said “You got any chocolate donuts?”

He said “No, we’re outta chocolate donuts”

I said “You got any Boston cream donuts?”

He said “No, we’re outta Boston cream donuts”

I said "You got any apple fritters?"

He said "No, we're outta apple fritters"

I said “You got any blueberry donuts?”

He said “No, we’re outta blueberry donuts”

I said "You got any bear claws?"

He said "Wait a minute, I'll go check"

"No, we're outta bear claws"

I said "Well, in that case, in that case, what do you have?"

He says "All I got right now is this box of one dozen starving, crazed weasels"

I said "OK, I'll take that"

IM GOING TO D IE