#izzy hands headcanons

[just-a-little-cellist]

I see you're taking requests!! I'd like to request a Izzy hand x gn/male reader where the reader is oddly obsessed with Izzy's hands if that's okay? Could be sfw or NSFW, whatever your heart is more into :3

(I'm so deeply in love with Izzy you don't understand, littol rat man stole my heart so I am more than happy to write for him)

(Izzy Hands x gender neutral reader - set pre-season 2, some NSFW towards the end :P)

Izzy is an observant man, so sooner or later he will notice the unusual amount of attention you direct towards him.

How he reacts to it, though, will depend on how close you already are.

If you two are not close, he maintains his distance for a bit while he tries to figure out what's going on with you. He doesn't understand at first what your intentions are - he figures if anything that you're just intimidated by him - so he doesn't think much of it. However, after catching you staring a few times while he's working and seeing your flustered face turn away, he guesses that there's something more behind it.

As he starts finding excuses for you to help him with things, another thing he notes is that you seem most fixated on him when he's working with his hands. He catches you, just once, transfixed by the way his hands move when he shows you how to tie a particular knot for the second time.

Izzy curses himself when he finds himself making an effort to get your attention like that more, and he maybe even initiates some casual affection, like putting a hand on your shoulder or your lower back while he's talking to you.

If you two are in a relationship when he begins to notice, the teasing will start fast.

"See something you like, darlin'?"

And once he sees just how flustered it gets you, he'll find any excuse to rile you up.

He absolutely does that thing where he cups your jaw with his fingers and traces his thumb over your lips.

He'll beckon you over on deck with a crook of his fingers, and from the smirk on his face he knows the filthy thoughts that motion sparks.

If Izzy's sat next to you, there's a hand placed firmly on your thigh and, if you don't protest, his fingers will trace upwards until you're squirming in your seat.

(Sidenote: if you ask him very nicely he will absolutely wear the glove in bed.)

[cotyledon8]

🐈‍⬛ regressor izzy hands

→ he’s an involuntary regressor (on the younger side of 1-5), and as a result of only really regressing when he’s put it off too long, or something negative has triggered it; he tends to be really teary and sleepy for most of it.

→ he spends heaps of his time small, curled up asleep somewhere or with someone as he tries to sleep it off. he usually ends up with gentlebeard, or frenchie, or fang. if jim’s small too, the two of them will sometimes be found together

→ he absolute loathes it, but he’s super emotionally fragile when he’s small, since he’s so tightly strung out every other time. there’s nothing worse than him getting into his head about something, getting teary over it and then getting mad he’s getting teary. it just spirals into an absolute tantrum

→ he loves watching people to their jobs while he just co-exists while small. he’ll sit on a crate and fiddle with scrap bits and pieces while while frenchie (and wee john) work, or sit in the galley with roach while the other man cooks. he even spends time up on the deck silently while buttons navigates

→ he’s not a huge talker while he’s small, not because he necessarily can’t talk, but mostly just because it’s a lot of effort at that point. he usually manages to get his point across regardless. him and jim have pretty much mastered having silent conversations between them

→ he’s a super picky eater, since he both gets an upset tummy really easily and because he just never feels like he has enough time to eat. the crew and his captains have learnt that the easiest way to get him to eat is to give him little bits of food throughout the day while he’s doing something. izzy hasn’t caught on yet

→ stede has a whole collection of embarrassing little nicknames for izzy, especially once izzy actually starts letting him be around him while small without a huge fight. actually most of the crew have some variation of nicknames for him. he pretends that he hates it more than anything; he loves it

→ on the few times that he will talk while small, whoever he’s with will usually he subjected to a complete infodump of facts about the ocean, and marine creatures and pirate ships. it’s as fascinating as it is endearing.

[bloomeng]

wooooo lesbian au body headcanons (everyone cheered)

(small warning for non-sexual nudity)

[dragonlands]

When divorce 3 is over I want Stede go to visit Mary and Doug with Ed and Izzy. Stede is in one of his frilly outfits again and these two are in their leathers following him like scary guard dogs. As they walk through town everyone is whispering about it, impressed and scared but then they arrive to Mary's house and knock. Mary is a bit hesistant to let her ex husband in with Blackbeard and Izzy Hands for gods sake but Stede insists so out of politeness she invites them in for tea. All five of them are in the salon drinking tea and then the kids come in and Mary tries to wordlessly tell them to go away, but they are way too interested in the pirates. And suddenly Blackbeard is on the floor with them, playing along with their games, making the kids laugh like never before. And after his cup is empty, Izzy Hands asks if they'd like him to sing some sweet love song. Mary and Doug look at each other, like "this cannot be real, is this a dream?" But Izzy starts singing and it's the most beautiful thing. And Stede just sits there with a cup of tea telling tales of his victories as the most fearsome pirates Mary and Doug have heard of act like a silly little harem of his. And Mary thinks that yeah maybe Stede was meant for this life after all.

When they leave she kisses all three of them on the cheek, and asks them to visit again soon.

[twitterdotcom]

Izzy fannon: can't eat certain foods because the texture reminds him of eating his toe

Izzy canon: eats a raw dead bird

[bookshelfdreams]

Saw a Take earlier today like "Ed stans have only 1 argument and it's accusing everyone who likes Izzy of being problematic" or something to that effect

and it made me think "Nah babe, you're not problematic. You're just wrong."

And then I thought. Huh. Why do I think that?

It's a perfectly respectable thing to read a text in a way it wasn't intended to be read. In fact, "reading against the grain", doing critical readings, shifting perspectives when engaging with a text - all of thee are important skills! You can, and should, do feminist, antiracist, postcolonial, queer, etc readings of texts that were never intended to be read that way. Hell, all fandom (often) is, is doing queer readings! Ask the text uncomfortable questions it doesn't want to answer!

However. It's pretty difficult to do a queer reading when the text already is a queer narrative. The questions you would ask the text if you did a queer reading, or a reading focused on gender roles, or similar things - those are questions the text is already actively exploring.

If you want to do a subversive reading of a text that is already quite subversive - what do you end up with?

"What's the story like from Izzy's perspective?" is a question ofmd deliberately doesn't focus too much on because Izzy's perspective is the default and ofmd wants to challenge that. There's a reason the angry white man is the antagonist in this show, and if you ask "Okay, but could he be right though?" you're missing the point.

Or rather, you're turning everything that's interesting about ofmd back around. You're asking "Okay, but why don't we focus on a white perspective that strictly adheres to oppressive power structures?" of a narrative who already asked itself this question and gave the answer "Because that's been done enough and there are other stories worth telling."

And I think people are aware of that, which is how we end up with completely bizarre takes like "Izzy has the only queer character arc". He hasn't, but he has the only arc that a queer reading can be done on - for everyone else it's text, plain and simple. Refusing to engage with that text in favour of centering Izzy is basically doing a heteronormative reading without being willing to admit it to yourself.

And no, interpreting Izzy as a queer man doesn't change that.

[hellsquills]

Someone mentioned in a post some time ago how it's likely that Izzy might call Stede "captain" out of spite for Ed

BUT NOW I can't stop thinking about Lucius, the oldest sibling one betrayed by both of his captains, being the first one to call Izzy "captain" in front of everyone

(Also considering how much OFMD likes parallels, this would be a good one:)

Gif by @lamberts

[aretheyqueer]

Is he a trans man?

disclaimer: this is a hc, not speculating on what the writers intentions were.

[jaypilled]

very excited for dreamzzz representing Weird Girls this monday

[caitlinsnicket]

izzy hands sfw headcanons part 2

a/n: part 1 here. part 3 here HAHAHAHA im going lulu (also if you see any mistakes feel free to tell me so

after the loss of his leg, sometimes he might pretend to forget his cane just so he has to lean on you for support. truth is, he hid it under his bed so you would have a harder time finding it and he could spend more time with your arms around him

speaking of leaning, he leans a lot to get a look at you from a lower perspective (not that it's hard, he's not very tall), he leans on your body, on your arms and on your shoulders because he likes your warmth and loves to feel you near him

holds your hand to move around as well, displaying it proudly to the crew and puffing his chest out like a peacock so they know you're together

also tends to get very flushed if you lean on him and hold his hand, looking around expecting a joke, until you distract him with kisses on his cheek

lives for moments where you need comfort. it's not that he likes it when you're feeling bad, but he likes to feel needed for emotional suport, like he's good enough to make you feel better

he loves to feel useful when it comes to you, and so he learns to anticipate your needs and wants. he leaves something light for you to eat on a table on his cabin beside a cup of water, when on land always buys you new clothing pieces that he knows you might need, gets extra blankets in the middle of the night because he knows you might get cold, all that cheesy stuff

he's a romantic at heart

he is very particular about his hair, and has learned how to keep it tidy and practical for his day to day like. however, if you ever ask him to run your hands through it in the middle of the day or to style it in a different way, he'll move like lightning to sit on the ground, head at your hand's level so you can do as you please

his 'disheveled hair' look is probably his hottest too, strands framing his face beautifully, making him look disgruntled and mysterious at the same time. your fingers ache to touch it whenever he's like that

after a while he starts wearing his hair loose (without gel or pomade) more often while on the job, relaxing more and more with his own image

(he still loves his puffy fancy hair though

it's also the softest hair ever. you don't mention it when you notice the many hair care products hidden behind his bathtub, or the different things he uses to keep his hair in place, just as he won't mention it when he notices that you started using them too to smell like him

his favorite thing to do is having his hair taken care of by you. just mark him as yours in as many ways as you can

the curls on the nape of his neck are so endearing and charming it's hard for you to pay attention on anything he's saying. if he notices, he swears at you and walks off, fighting a goofy smile

one day, he decides he's gonna cut his hair short. you are supportive about it, obviously, even if a part of you is dying inside. so he goes out, cuts it and comes back with a glint on his eyes that is so obvious and endearing, as if he's begging you to praise him and call him pretty

and he just looks so nice and tidy and hot (so fucking hot) that you can't help but spend the next hour or so messing with his hair until his legs are wobbly and his mouth is hanging open

his hair ends up being spiked up very often, which makes him look younger and more relaxed. it brings warmth to your heart, and a shy smile to his lips

taking care of him is a tricky job, reserved to you (and fang) on the rare occasions he's too sick to fight back. still, he whines and struggles and cusses the both of you out until he gets too tired to complain anymore and just allows it to happen

feels extremely embarassed and self conscious whenever you feed him soup, but secretely he's vibrating with joy from your attention and care. he can't help but notice how much love is present from your touches and actions, and it makes him feel almost worthy of it

his favorite foods are the ones you cook for him when he's sick. you manage to put so much flavor and affection in it those that sometimes he yearns for a cold or a headache just so you'll cooks him something without him having to ask

he doesn't notice how much better you treat him in comparison to past lovers until jim or fang mention it to him, and he starts watching the things you do for him

it's the little things for him, like the way you neatly fold his clothes after he takes them off, the way there's always a cup of water on the side of his bed in the morning, or how sometimes you'll just remember things that he's mentioned in passing once and buy him a related trinket when you're both on land

he's over the moon and proud of having earned your affections, and will even grin in that manic way that sometimes gets to him

[izzyhandslightofmylife]

Punching bag! Izzy is the best type of Izzy I'm so sorry. Like on one hand there's Ed, and Ed is trying so hard to be good, because the Kraken's gone, he's gone, and he doesn't want to take the blame for it so he takes it out on Izzy. Because if there's one thing he knows about Izzy it's that Izzy is loyal, if there's one thing he knows about Izzy it's that Iz loves him. And this is just the way it is. Izzy needs it, or Ed thinks he does, so he takes whatever Ed gives because being hit is better than being ignored.

On the other hand, you have Stede, who's always preaching about kindness and forgiveness on his ship but who still makes fun of Izzy. who still ignores Izzy. who still makes fun of Izzy. Stede who wants so desperately to be seen as a 'real pirate' that he'll do anything to prove it. Stede who also knows that Izzy is loyal to a fault, Stede who loves (or claims to love) his crew and doesn't want to hurt them. Stede who sees Izzy as the one thing he's allowed to hurt because everyone is good and Izzy is always there and Izzy just isn't.

Ed and Stede who refuse to admit that their love isn't the same that it once was. That the separation changed them and that these grand acts of romance won't just fix it. Ed and Stede who don't actually want to talk, don't want to fight because it'd bring up all the pain they caused each other. Ed and Stede who have Izzy, always standing next to them or at their feet, Izzy who's right there and so easy to get mad at when they don't want to get mad at each other.

Izzy who's starving for love and will do anything to get it. Izzy who's so fundamentally convinced that he's unlovable, any scrap of love is accepted even if it comes with unimaginable violence. Izzy trying to protect the crew because the crew are good and he isn't, and they're all so happy with their captains, and he doesn't want to shatter the "family" again.

please, I'm begging you guys, write more of this. Just. Izzy as a punching bag.

[maxer-blaster]

You all know this image from the next on OFMD spoilers video?

What if

It's the crew reacting to Izzy singing?

Jim being feral

Stede looking surprised but happy

And Ed...

He doesn't look like he's smiling

But he's raising a glass.

Maybe he feels conflicted.

Like "oh look at this depth to a dude you thought you knew"

Look at the pain you put him through

[belovedcarrion]

Okay so in 2x01 Jackie tells the Swede that she thinks double crosses are hot, right?

Does that mean when Izzy went to her for help in s1 about (sort of) double crossing Edward did Spanish Jackie think she was just helping a bro with his fucked up foreplay?

[rimbaudofficial]

modern (Ouizzy) Izzy headcanons

he's divorced from Ed, and the marriage was terrible at the end. Ed, of course, ended the marriage by cheating with Stede and ultimately leaving Izzy for him. there was abuse, as is canon.

he's trans (obviously). he transitioned very young, before high school and before meeting Ed. he gets top surgery as soon as he can afford it, and a metoidioplasty sometime in the early 2000s.

he smokes, though Frenchie gets him to quit sooner or later after they get together.

he's a masochist, but it takes him a while to ask Frenchie for pain because he's convinced Frenchie won't like giving it.

he has a very nice and very old well-cared-for leather jacket he wears every single day. his boots are similarly ancient and treasured.

the longer he's with Frenchie, the more he replaces his silver body jewelry with gold, which Frenchie insists suits him better, and his black clothes with earth tones, which is also something Frenchie insists is better. the ancient black leather jacket never changes, though.

he likes Adventure Time. why and how this came about I cannot say.

his dog, Princess Bubblegum, is his ride or die.

he's a scorpio, to Frenchie's endless amusement.

he doesn't wear cologne, but his soap is pine-tar. because of sensitivity to its ingredients and also Frenchie's encouragement, he eventually gives up on pomade and grows his hair out a little. there are ponytails.

[arsenicflame]

Izzy Hands can have a little "thinking hes incapable of feeling love" as a treat (for me. the treat is for me)

[themistymountainscold]

frenchie and izzy are both lactose intolerant but izzy actually makes sure to not consume any lactose while frenchie spends a lot of time in the bathroom cause he eats cheese by the block and will drink all the full cream milk he can get his hands on.