#ive said this same thing like probably 20 times now but i feel bad im so sorry dkfjhnh

[perilegs]

my sweet little baby man is no longer with us

[memequeen92]

unfortunately I have tagged several of my fics as abandoned/unlikely to be finished

whether or not it is temporary remains to be seen - but treat it as if it's permanent since for all intents and purposes it sort of is right now

I didn't really want to do that honestly, because I do want to finish them - but having covid twice in one year as an already chronically ill person has... really, really drained me both physically and mentally and it's unfortunately going to take a while for me to really recover properly. I have zero energy for writing or really anything that requires much thinking, and probably won't for a while.

Sorry ya'll, wish I wasn't totally drained but covid fucked me up (again, lmao)

[ckret2]

Ive only read one fic that dives deeply into bill being from flatland (flat dreams, though its popular enough, you probably heard about it from someone). And while i love it, im realy intrigued by your ideas cause its taking things in a widly opposite direction

Not only have I heard about it—multiple times!—I've also already had a couple of folks comment on my posts in a way that makes it clear they're assuming my headcanons are inspired by/based on Flat Dreams, rather than simply based on Flatland.

This is the first time someone's said they're intrigued because it's different from Flat Dreams. I feel like there's probably gonna be a lot of people measuring up my headcanons against the other fic they all know and there's not much I can do about that, so I appreciate hearing something positive!

At the moment I haven't read past chapter 2—through absolutely no fault of the author's own, it's pretty irritating to have credit for one's own writing & ideas be given to somebody else who had nothing to do with it, and it's put me off from reading the fic for now—but I have gone out of my way to get as thoroughly spoiled for the fic as I can just to make sure I'm not, y'know, accidentally retreading the exact same plot as the most well-known backstory fic in the fandom.

And yeah, by the sound of it, I just decided to veer off in a completely different direction from Flat Dreams right from the outset.

Between Bill's monologue during Weirdmageddon and "EDWIN ABBOT ABBOT HAS A DECENT IDEA" it makes perfectly logical sense to go "Flatland exactly as it is can be treated as 100% canon to Gravity Falls -> Bill is an extremely weird guy from an extremely repressive & controlling world -> Bill was trying to undo his society's oppression, went way too far, and became the villain," and get a narratively compelling backstory that fits perfectly with canon and does exactly what everyone kinda expects Bill to have done based on what we know.

However, it also happens to be a narrative that personally rubs me the wrong way. I don't think it's bad, and I still enjoy stories that use it—but it bothers me enough that I don't want to write it myself.

Conversational detour time! I've been in Transformers fandom for about 20 years, and—to oversimplify a complicated and protracted series of narrative reboots—over time, the writers of the franchise decided to give the evil villainous Decepticon army more narrative depth by stating that their home planet used to be extremely corrupt, oppressive, and controlling (you can safely compare it to 1984, Flatland, and a whole bevy of other dystopias), and the Decepticons rose up as a rebellion against the oppressive government—but then went too far, turned evil, devastated their planet, started conquering and slaughtering the rest of the galaxy, etc. etc.

The problem with this is the Decepticons are the antagonists' faction, which means the heroes are usually the surviving legacy of the corrupt oppressive government—and so for a long while you got stories with unintentional implications like "are the oppressive government and the underprivileged minorities fighting back against the government actually equally bad?" or "maybe if we let the most painfully oppressed people in society exercise any political power, their first instinct will be to oppress other people" or "sure, cops are bad and nobody wants a police state, but maybe the best solution is to find the nicest cops and put them in charge."

I say this as somebody who loves Transformers dearly, and Transformers does take some stabs at grappling with these moral issues. I don't even necessarily think it's always a bad idea to write a "faction fighting for a Good Cause goes too far and becomes worse than the thing they're fighting" story.

But several years of grimacing at the same bunch of Unfortunate Implications made me personally lean away from writing any story ideas that could be summed up as "—and attempting to fight systematic oppression made him evil."

So right from the get-go I was always going to avoid the most straightforward "Bill became a villain over the course of fighting Flatland's oppression" backstory—and trying to come up with something entirely different that still fits his claim that he "liberated" his "flat-minded" world pretty much guaranteed I wouldn't write a backstory that had much in common with Flat Dreams.

And from everything else I currently know about Flat Dreams, it seems like on most big plot points, I just sorta decided before I knew anything about the fic besides "it's Bill in Flatland" that I would do something different. "Bill gives me hella only child vibes, and that might make a good contrast to how the main cast all have siblings to help emotionally balance them." "I think I'd rather characterize his home world as less like a dystopian Victorian England and more like vaguely-modern vaguely-Western society—something that's easier for the audience see echoes of our world in than a satire a century removed from its context." "Bill doesn't strike me as someone who's good at making or maintaining friends, so with the possible exception of the Flatlander-looking guys I bet his Henchmaniacs are an ever-shifting gang of shallow brief friendships, so he's probably only known most of them a few years." "In the main fic and in Bill's backstory, as much as possible I want to introduce and play with new ideas rather than have major plot points depend upon plot devices we've already seen used in canon (for instance, ruling out Globnar as the source of Bill's power)."

I dunno what this says, except that two writers can take the exact same source materials and decide to construct a narrative with the exact same overall arc about the exact same character guided by the exact same canon quotes/details, and still come up with two wildly different stories depending upon the writers' individual tastes, priorities, and interests.

so uh tl;dr: yep I've heard of Flat Dreams; I respect its position in the fandom but haven't read it yet; based on what I know about it, I think I'm just interested in telling another story than Flat Dreams' author, and that's neither better nor worse but it is different. (And I really appreciate hearing "I'm interested in seeing something different"!)

[malevolententity]

hrmgmgm 4ever situ thoughts

this will probably get messy and personal because that Really informs how i feel and i need to expel it from my body LMAO

i still dont know how i feel. or well. i know how i feel but its nuanced and conflicted and im mad that i cant concisely say how i feel. we Know the initial information didnt come out in good faith. we Know that the girls involved were not asked how they felt prior to the callouts. we also can see from current actions that this doesnt happen anymore. that it doesnt represent who he is as a person in recent years.

and i fully believe that people are able to change and grow from past wrong actions. regardless of if those actions were just wrong jokes or Literal Actions.

this cycle never gets easier. ive been on both sides e.g. being like one of the girls. but also being one of the ccs. so i get their no nuance just anger. because m still mad as hell about ike/ciel. as someone who was good friends with him. but also was the same age as his victims and very easily could be considered one by some people. shout out to being two people removed from ironmouse though 🤪.

but ive also like. been in the girls situation. you dig back 11/12 years on here. theres Going to be evidence of 22 year olds with thousands of followers flirting with 13/14 year old me. some of whom were harmless friends making weird tasteless no intent jokes. and some of whom were genuine pedophiles that either were complete strangers or people i knew in real life and called friends. and id be fucking pissed if any of those were taken out of or even in context without my permission. because its my story. if anyones going to be talking about it it should only ever be because i decided i wanted it to be talked about. not some random person having a vendetta against people i used to talk to and finding and using bits of my story as a way to defame someone whos recent actions do not line up with the deplorable actions of them in 20 fucking 12.

and so i cant help but have 800 fucking emotions. because what we know about is gross. but i dont believe he should be fully deplatformed over shit he hasnt done in 5-7 years. and that is absolutely fueled by my emotions because as far as we know. the girls did not ask for him to be deplatformed. the girls stories are being spread without their input to ruin a guys life. and i would feel violated if i was used as evidence by strangers against my will.

but maybe thats just the victim brain in me who will always feel the need to shield some of the guys from my past because its complicated and messy and humans are complicated and messy. and im just projecting. because i have been in those girls position. a few times.

and thats why ive been mostly silent through this whole thing. because i am a Hashtag Bad Victim and no one wants to hear from the people who think were being too hasty and think information should come from the people involved. not twitter sleuths who really fucking hate a cc.

that said for people who need to see it written out. im not supporting him with views on future videos. i still enjoy 4ever as a character. i will still probably reblog 4ever art every now and then, because ive also gone thru this in a dnd fandom where one guy turned out to be a shitter but i still enjoyed his character so i will engage with the character when i feel like it. because that character is not the streamer.

this whole situation just feels bad and unfair to absolutely everyone involved. no one here is winning. celebrating his removal is weird. because the removal means something Did happen and thats horrible. and watching this turn into a spectacle to see who unfollows next/what the next announcement is, is disgusting. this isnt a game and it feels like some of you are treating it that way. these are real lives, these are real people.

side tangent.

i really fucking cant stand everyone whos been comparing this to the dream situations. because every single dream situation has come from victims or people posing as victims. so of course. listen to them and do your own research but believe them from the get go. THIS THOUGH????? WAS ADMITTEDLY UNRELATED PEOPLE WHO HATED A GUY, WHO FOR MONTHS HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO DEPLATFORM HIM. AND FINALLY FOUND SOMETHING THAT WAS ACTIONABLE. of course some of us were going to hold off on forming thoughts and were gonna be skeptical of where the information came from because it was not victims coming forward.

its two different fucking situations and acting like theyre the same is insane to me.

[ooglywooglies]

yknow that thing i said awhile ago about how trans men and trans women probably inherently make each other dysphoric. i think i was right, i love my girl mutuals and people i follow and stuff but sometimes all the girlcentric stuff kind of wears me out, like dont stop posting what you wanna post but i need to figure something out.

tags were getting too long so im just continuing the post because i guess i cant express the sentiment i want to without dragging on

if you pay attention to my long posts youve probably figured ive been going through some insecurity issues recently, a lot of it is not helped by the fact that i keep doomscrolling on tumblr and digging into discourse tags like the whole "transandrophobia" thing, ive since changed my mind about that tag btw. yknow how i said before that "its a stupid term that has no basis in reality but the transphobia and misogyny trans men face is a real issue that probably needs a specific name for categorization purposes specifically on tumblr dot com" no i think its not important afterall

mostly because ive been watching the decay of this tag for a long time and it keeps CONSTANTLY getting infiltrated by terfs and transmisogynists and ive been talking to someone who is trying to deradicalize people involved and shes like yeah this whole theory/movement/framing basically encourages self pity and resentment so its a breeding ground for transmisogyny (and regular misogyny) and i think i agree with that

but its hard not to see the problems with this tag/community/whatever it is and the response transfeminists have to it and now just go god transmascs are fucking annoying, and i feel embarrassed to be associated with them

and thats stupid, its basically the same thing as white guilt, yknow that thing where when white people learn racism exists they go oh well im sorry for being alive it would be better if white people were just never born. its like no one asked you to feel sorry for YOURSELF (or anyone else, poc in this situation just want you to be responsible when necessary and be respectful)

so like, im not ashamed of being a trans man i guess, not on the basis that theyre capable of and often perpetuate transmisogyny. i think ive talked before about feeling like being a trans man could be antithetical to feminism because some feminists suggest that manhood/masculinity is an inherently toxic and oppressive class, if thats true transitioning into manhood/masculinity would be a morally objectionable thing to do. i think being a man is not inherently bad, i think that gender is not a choice even if one has some benefits over the other (why would trans women ever "choose" to be women if the only factor of gender was privilege) i think this sentiment im so worried about is something basically only terfs (cis radfems) actually believe and try to perpetuate

but i also mentioned on another post that "tumblr tricks you into thinking trans people are annoying" and also that a lot of transmascs both in the tag but also on this site in general are like not older than 22

a lot of the trans guys i follow or are friends with (none of my twitter guys are here and i dont do twitter anymore) are closer to my age, being in their late 20s and you can FEEL the maturity difference. i think being on tumblr does make you think that all transmascs are basically annoying middle class teenage white people who only watch childrens cartoons and it makes the stereotypes about transmascs feel even HARDER to escape from. I CONSTANTLY feel insecure about having feminine interests, about being minimized and belittled, being infantalized, being emasculated, it really doesnt fucking help that im also (south)east asian and historically east asian people have been like hyperfeminized/emasculated compared to other groups

im not sure if im done with this post or not but i got distracted after writing this so i cant remember if i wanted to say anything else so im just gonna be done now

[misswabit]

B R O ok Ive posted the same 2 pieces of art on my insta and on my art blog and the differences are so crazy For a little background I've already fully given up on insta tbh im just posting on there for artist alley juries to see my work easily (which is liberating to post on there and not care how things do at all) and I have just over 120 followers on there which is real real low, ive truly never succeeded there and each post at most gets 12 likes maybe? 20 if my face is in it which i hate posting lol (honestly not even trying to brag a little insta just loves faces more in general i am an average person) Insta also does this thing where if you share the post you just posted on your stories (a thing you MUST do if you want your followers to actually have a chance at seeing it) it shows you exactly who viewed said story, and therefore outs the friends of yours who saw it and did not like your art making you feel 10x worse lmao like just don't show me that p l e a s e. Anyway! From the 2 art posts i made during the "rush hour" on insta, and after sharing it to my stories, I got a combined total of 11 likes, 4 on one 7 on the other. Insta showed me that all my friends saw and almost no one liked it. If i wasnt just posting now for artist alleys i would have probably been really hurt by that news like i was every time before because it feels like im just left to drown and never grow on there when that happens. But now i have a different motive on there so it wasnt emotionally bad at all! I just brushed it off and i know that theres more to look at on my portfolio now! But I also recently decided to start posting on my art blog more. Mostly just for me because practically n o o n e follows it. I have 12 followers, of those most of them are friends i know arent on tumblr anymore. and what do i get from posting the same 2 things on there? 16 reblogs, 2 of which have comments telling me my art is "peak" or their "favorite" and 46 likes. Now I know that these are still low numbers, but when you think of my following on here its pretty impressive people got to see them at all! much less leave supportive comments. compare that with my supposed 120+ followers and 11 likes its really flattering. I hate meta for many reasons but wow i really genuinely like tumblr

[tera-91]

Mid-April thoughts

I didn’t mean to take a pause in posting. My thoughts have been a jumble lately.

My pup will need to have surgery so ive been working extra hours so that I can work less during the healing process. It sucks but I would rather go through with it now than the little cuddle bug be in discomfort. Poor thing has had some rough luck in the knee genetics department.

I have also been contemplating a job change but I would have to go to school for it. So Ive been dealing with checking out everything that I need to do for that. I think if I can be patient, which for me is kind of difficult, it would be a really good thing cuz I could potentially basically make in a day what I currently do in a week. It would definitely make things easier for me. But I wont be able to complete it for a few years. So I don’t know exactly what to do with my time between now and when I would be able to start taking courses.

Another jumbled thought I have is should I take advantage of the down time to try to pursue some side quests to make a little extra here and there to build it up so that I can quit my job while I go through school. I will have to be a three quarter to full time student while doing it so working and school might be a little bit of a juggling act. Also as bad as it might sound, I would rather do side quests than my actual job. I know that for most jobs dealing with people can be completely unavoided and there are jobs where it can be which would be a plus but I just get drained both mentally and physically dealing with people.

Other things have been good though.

I think I have figured out a way around some issues I was having with my videos. I just need to be able to spend some time to edit those so that I can post them. I have a pretty decent bank of them so I can spend time with my fluff ball to make sure healing goes well.

Writing I think is going good but also having a bit of a block. While I know I said I was probably going to take a break on sanders side stories, I somehow have 3 I’ve been working on. Maybe because I feel like I resonate with Virgil so its easier to write something with him verses starting something else. I can get anywhere from 300-500 words before my brain just halts and I cant figure out where to take it. I have an idea of the beginning but the further into it the murkier it gets and I don’t know where I want to take it. Part of me wants to go a fluff route but also writing is a bit of an emotional outlet for me. So part of me wants to just follow whatever emotion I have going at the time. Whether it be anger, frustration, etc but when I take a step back to review and edit I have hesitations. I know angst is a category and an option to post but at the same time I want what I create to be an escape for someone. Would that be helpful to others to read that or could it not be.

I guess anything could be helpful to anyone. Just a little bit of internal struggle. Maybe that is what is causing the block. Also I think I have a slight hesitation to post anything short after posting 2000-3000+ stories in the past. Even my word salads have been decently long. Also I get easily distracted or something just takes longer than I think it should and I get discouraged.

I hope everyone is having a good April. The weather is finally warming up but I think it has gone a bit too far. Gone from cold straight to HOT. I was hoping to have a little more slightly warm days so that way I could spend some time hanging outside and get back into painting. Or even just to enjoy nature for more than 15, maybe 20 minutes if Im lucky before it gets too hot out there. After I post this I might go try to enjoy as much time I can tolerate in the heat. I got some good nature photos the last time I went outside with my camera. Sometimes I contemplate if I should post them on here or maybe make an Instagram account and post them on there.

[sydneyshipsstuff]

answering both of the recent tag games in one since im lazy (so scroll for the questions below the bingo)

tagged by @professional-benaddict (sorry for responding so late lol) and because i dont have too many mutuals, tagging anyone who sees it & wants to do it!

I chose my baby Spider-Man/Peter Parkee, with a focus on the starker fandom!

1. How did you discover your fave?

spider-man movies -> video edits on insta/tiktok -> irondad fanfics on wattpad -> ao3 -> looking at starker in disgust -> becoming a part of the fandom

2. How long have you been a fan of your fave?

since homecoming! when it first came out but it took me a while to start interacting with the fandom

3. Do you write for your fave? (E.g. AU's, Drabbles, Fan Fics.)

sorta! i don't actively write, just kinda drabble sometimes and i mostly dont post that, plus helping others write, i do have drafts that have been in my docs for years though

4. Do you like what is canon about your fave?

i do but i feel bad for him! poor guy has nobody :((, but before endgame i was in love with canon.

5. Tell some of your headcanons of your fave.

•his spider abilities on top of the originals like purring, cant have peppermint, hibernates, etc

•his love of animals, always stopping on patrols to say hi to them or trying to keep the strays he finss

•being worthy of mjolnir and picking it up without knowing the significance

•that he worms his way into the hearts of everyone he meets

6. Do you draw for your fave? (E.g. Fan Art)

no i dont, but i love seeing others fan art obviously!

7. If your fave/s are portrayed by several actors, who are your fave portrayers?

basic, ik, but tommy.

8. Are you more into Books/ Comics/Films when it comes to your fave?

mostly the fanfics then anything, but the movies and comics are so entertaining.

9. Quote anything about what your fave has said.

this ones weird but when i went to new york i went out of my way to go to moma because of him mentioning it to tony

10. Quote your favourite line of your fave!

basic but the "When you can do the things that I can, but you don't, and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you." because even though its sad/semi unhealthy to put that pressure on yourself, i relate to it in a way and uphold myself to helping whenever i can.

11. Ever made a edit for/of your fave?

i dont think so? maybe photos but that would have been a while ago

12. Songs you associate with your fave?

anything to do w new york really

13. If your fave was real, do you think they'd like you?

i think so, if we meant in a natural way lolol, i try to be social and i think id be able to joke with him

14. Amongst your fave/s who do you think are you? (E.g. You have 5 faves, amongst the 5 of them you think of yourself as fave no.3)

skipping because i only am answering for the one

15. Do you know your fave origin story?

yes i doo, radioactive spider bite, yada yada, parents dead, yada yada, uncle shot, rip, grew up in queens & stayed there

16. In 1 word describe your fave’s aesthetic.

akward

17. Is/Are your fave/s famous on A03?

yes very much, but mostly for irondad

18. Ships that you like with your fave?

i do like irondad if thats even considered a ship, peter w tony, harley, steve, stephen, and bucky, either seperate or at the same time, and im open to other pairings too

19. Is/Are your fave/s well known?

yes very well

20. If your fave/s have a fandom, what do you think about the fandom?

i like them, idk if theyd like me now that ive gone to the dark side lol

21. Describe yourself using something your faves have said

oops kinda did this already for another question but, "I am Responsible. I…Oh crap. My backpack’s gone." I try to be responsible but i am very clumsy and forgetful lol, and i do a lot of stupid shit

22. If you would feed your fave/s something, what would it be?

as big of a meal as i could possibly make, very carby, probably pasta, get some meat on those bones and feed the super apetite

23. How do you see yourself in any of your fave/s?

i see the optimism/ akwardness in myseld as well, we are semi-close in age so i think that contributes to it

24. Ever taken a break from your fave/s?

sorta, it was very short and it was mostly in between going from irondad to starker as well as small breaks i took from everything lol

25. If your fave/s were to have a crossover, who and which character would they have a crossover with?

well they did have one with stephen and the other spidermen but i think it would be cool to see him really interacting w the women of marvel, aka kate, yelena or natasha (also rip), pepper, captain marvel, america chavez, etc.

[dokiyeom]

DWWW u will see that from now on I'll just pop on ur inbox with random pics or just . rants LMAOOO hihiih do u have maybe dc or twt?? i feel like that would be easier to interact on yk? + i have a little something i wanna show u 🤭 PLS SHARE THEM WITH ME YES!! im such a sucker of ranting about fics & fic ideas with friends istg..

ill try it when I can but i live in a small village so they don't have that here 😞 ill go to the city for uni though so ik ill explore more diff foods since im a big fan of that yk!

mmmm ok ok now ik when to send u an ask 😝 && that's so interesting?? do u still have family there or will u go alone if u move there! tbh france is only cool from a touristic pov 😭 like i could write an essay about how much i hate certain things here it's Awful BUT i do like the museums and more artistic side so yayay OHHH??? HELLO that's so cool i love how u remember only that 🙏🙏 i love tulips they are my fav flowers too 😞💔

TWT THEORIES SAID SO TOO !! that would be a very unique announcement actually ohh :O for my friends 18th bday party another friend lent me a black dress w a v line collar? it was very light and just overall v cute but simple so i might just go for something with the same vibe ngl bit im picky too and i haven't really been able to find clothes i like for a few years rn so it's a bit of a problem 👎

OMG WHAT ALBUMS?????? i want to have the carat bong so bad but ill buy it (for now) if they come here in concert yk & if i can still use v2 for concerts! i hope u soon can get ur carat bong 🙏 omg show me PLS PLS PLS i have one too and i love seeing other people's collections 😞

i have . a lot 😭 rn i have 18 albums with 2 more for my bday...... PREAPRE URSELF. i have aespa girls, astro switch on, atz treasure ep fin all to action, bts love urself answer & proof, enhypen dimension dilemma & manifesto day 1, lsrfm antifragile (I PULLED SAKURA YAYYY), nct dream glitch mode, svt director's cut (THE LUCK I HAD FOR THIS ONE got it WITH PCS for 20€) semicolon & face the sun, skz no easy & christmas evel, tbz maverick, txt minisode blue hour & tcc fight or escape and woodz only lovers left!! for my bday i alr bought enhypen border day carnival + bss second wind hehe 🫶🫶

THAT NEW THEME WOULD BE SO COOL!!! omg tell me when u did it i wanna see it first hihi 💥💥💥

omg i have both !! but tbh i don’t think i’ve logged into discord in months,, but i’ll send u my twt :D AND RIGHT !! i feel like just talking abt ur fic ideas helps a lot w the writing process

oo id rec just making it at home if it’s possible !! i feel like sukiyaki would b a bit pricey at restaurants,, but the ingredients may b a bit inaccessible :0 && agh dw abt timing for asks !! i have an extremely turbulent sleep sched so pls just send them whenever it’s convenient for u :D

&& yesyes i have family there !! but tbh id probably want to move there alone if i could,, && that makes a lot of sense !! is it like the short stay that makes france fun for tourists ? or like general novelty of things wear off over time :0 ALSO HELLO SVT DIRECTORS CUT ?? that’s so cool hello ??? whod u pull :000

and dori,, i’ve unfortunately been collecting¿ buying albums for a while now,,, like i quite literally cannot list them all fjdjshs but i have svt, lsfm, twice, stayc, aespa, nct, txt, enha, ive, nmixx, izone, red velvet, and itzy albums :D i got really lucky w where i live bc there’s an album store nearby,, so sometimes my friends n i go together :D AND YES DEF U WILL B THE FIRST TO SEE THE NEW DOKIYEOM CARRD !!!

[elirastudio]

Shadow King au

This is before the whole spider queen thing and I’ve been thinking about this for so long and I think Ive been too cruel towards Xiaotian…let’s change that shall we?

——

Sitting next to his father as he watched the generals play and help with the smaller monkeys, both old and young. He smiles and rested his head on his shoulder, he felt the king’s fur move as he felt a nuzzle on his head. Laughing at the exchange, Xiaotian hugged his father not wanting to let go. Not wanting to open his eyed. For he knows what it meant if he did.

For what he’s been doing and seeing weren’t real…this reality was all in his head….

It was

A dream

Everything that’s going on was a dream… and he hated the very knowledge of it.

His eyes opened and looked at his father’s tail on his arm, it made the little prince feel protected, his focus was directed at a monkey who somehow seemed different from the others. He was a tad taller than the other monkeys but shorter than his father, probably a tad shorter than himself.

“That one has been there for a while”

“He could need some help, dad. I’ll check up on him”

“Be careful, Xiaotian!”

Xiaotian walked up to strange monkey carefully, as he got closer the little one looked similar to someone…he couldn’t think of anyone. It wasn’t Mei nor Red Son, CERTAINLY not the other Pilgrims but then who?

The small monkey smiles and looked at the young prince.

“Hey, uh bud…h-how are you?”

It was him…Sun Wukong….but tiny and his eyes were glowing a warm golden shimmer…

Silence filled the air with both young beings living in Flower Fruit Mountain….Uuuuntil

“AHHHHHHHH”

“AHHHHHHHH”

Both of them started yelling…

Well things are starting smoothly to say the least…

“DAAAAD! DAD! ITS WUKONG!!” Xiaotian yelled as he started to run back to his dad

“WHAT WAIT NO HOLD UP” Yelled the young king as he chased the young prince trying to reason with him.

They spent around 15-20 minutes in their little cat and mouse game until the prince realized that they were at a standstill. So he stopped running and stood firm to the king, whom he towers over easily.

“What are YOU doing here?!”

The young king placed his hands up and gave the boy some space

“Listen, this is going to sound weird but I’m not Wukong….I mean I AM Sun Wukong BUT not Sun Wukong who’s running away! Argh! This so complicated to explain!…”

The small king sat down out of frustration and looked towards the boy.

“Ok let me try this again…Im Wukong waay before he went crazy”

Xiaotian stopped and looked at him calmly now. He recognized his outfit…his father has it in a box inside his room. It was precious to him so Xiaotian knew never to touch them.

He wore a yellow top with a green scarf over his neck, red bottoms and a white belt to tighten everything up. Dark boots to complement the outfit.

“Listen I want to talk to you…about Wukong…a-about me? Argh its so confusing when you’re your older you voice of reason…”

The prince sat down next to the young king, seeing he has no intention in hurting him. Seeing Wukong struggle made him feel a bit bad.

“I got an idea…why don’t we you Mk here? It can help you see the differentiate between the two of you”

“But that’s your nickname…Mei gave it to you from that game-”

“Monkey Mech” Said at the same time both of them looked each other and laughed.

“How are you here if My dad gave me a seal?”

“Oh Liu’er is good at seals…but I’m better~ so I just opened and closed the seal like nothing happened…and besides Im not a threat so it’s not gonna hurt me”

Satisfied with the answer Xiaotian decided to sit close to the young king and started talking.

They talked about everything, about Flower Fruit Mountain, about their respective firends, about Macaque, and about their fears.

“No way, Sun Wukong, Great Sage Equal to Heaven is afraid of preforming in front of a crowed?!” Xiaotian laughed in disbelief as Mk, Monkey King, laughed on his back.

“I know I know! It doesn’t make sense!! Ahhh I haven’t laughed like that in over maybe a Millennia? Ahhh that was something!”

Xiaotian laughing filled the young king up with joy, he needed this. The boy away from his home and his father because of his stupid and selfish self. Sure it wasn’t him but his older self, in the young king’s ming he felt guilty and needed to take responsibility for it.

“Xiaotian? I want to apologize for what Wukong is doing…to you and your family…I want you to know that I did everything I could to stop him…I swear…I didn’t…I didn’t want you to get hurt…you’re just a cub and-” Mk said trying to hold his tears, he seen everything he heard everything but did nothing, COULDN’T do anything. With his hands he wiped away his tears the most he could.

Xiaotian hugged the crying king and held him tight. Like his father did when he was crying.

“Hey hey its ok I know you did the most you could…And I appreciate it so much…you’re NOT Wukong, Mk…you’re the Monkey King…”

Mk wanted to say something but just kept crying, saying sorry and held the prince tightly. Feeling the prince’s tears, hearing his ‘I know, its ok, not your fault’ calmed the young king.

“I-Its almost morning…you’ll be waking up soon…”

“W-will I see you again?”

Mk froze and looked at the prince, who was pleading with his eyes. The young king smiled and cupped Xiaotian’s face.

“As long as you want me…I will visit…”

They gave one final hug as everything went white.

~~~~

“Mk? Kid?” Pigsy’s voice rang softly to MK’s ears, waking him up slowly. “It’s mornin’ kid you got the day off today…wanna go to over to Mei’s with Redson?”

Mk just nodded and sat up, he looked at the pilgrim. The pilgrim sighed and looked at the boy sadly.

“No Xiaotian…he…he still hasn’t called nor came by…”

Mk nodded layed back down facing away from Pigsy. Hurt, the pig demon placed a hand on the boy’s head and sighed.

“I’ll call Ao Lie and let him know you’re coming”

Xiaotian heard Pigsy get up and walk out the room. He look at the rising sun and remembered the words of Mk as he smiled

‘As long as you want me…I will visit…’

~~~~

“Where the hell were you?”

“Oh I thought you wanted me gone~”

“I do…but that doesn’t mean I can’t ask where you’ve been”

“I guess so” The young King smiled as he felt a strong weight off his chest…

Hehehe its so beautiful and I love it😩💕✨

I have another fix that I’m keeping cuz there is a comic to do on it, but yes the fact that wukong can get in MK mind it’s a thing, a thing that in the good (like this) or in the bad ( like the other fic I have) has to be stopped.

But this all intersection kinda spoilers us all “season 3” we will eventually get there😂

[gumdecay]

.

[reidsnose]

love letters

overview: spencer has a wonderful idea after finding out that reader had never gone to her senior prom

genre: fluff fluff fluff

a/n: i mixed two ideas that have been sitting in my notes app for this lol but i think its sweet!! i wrote it a little rushed and definitely not bc im not getting a prom this year due to miss rona👀 LMAO but as always please lmk what yall think ab it :)

masterlist

-

the idea had fully occupied his thoughts the second after the words left your mouth.

it was "the buttcrack of dawn" as you had called it, though spirits were high on the late jet ride home. it was a rare but much needed positive end to the case, and everyone was happily chatting with each other. since the case was involving high schoolers, the subject fell on prom. everyone went around sharing their prom stories one by one, recalling awful dresses and questionable dates til the questions turned to spencer.

"what ab you, pretty boy, what was your prom like?" morgan asked, still smiling widely from recalling his own.

you watched spencer shift uncomfortably for a second.

"i uh..i never went to prom." he stammered, a tight lipped smile on his face.

"no! you just dont wanna tell us!" prentiss cried, throwing her hands in the air.

"i graduated high school when i was 12! why would i have gone to prom?" he reasoned.

"you had to have gone when you were older or something! everyone has!" jj countered.

"thats not true, i never went to prom either," you defended, subconsciously inching closer to spencer.

before anyone could even ask you to explain why, spencer got the idea. he mentally left the conversation after you gave your answer. he spent the whole rest of the ride home and the next couple of weeks brain storming and planning.

and casually after work one day, as he was walking you to your car, he asked you if you wanted to hang out with him that weekend; at his house.

you and Spencer had hung out before, but mostly at your house or at coffee shops; he didn't invite people over very often.

of course you agreed but you grew confused when he told you to dress fancy.

you raced home afterwards to raid your closet, looking for any fancy dresses you may have stuffed in there.

spencer spent the whole day preparing his apartment. he put up streamers and balloons. he made a playlist of all your favorite songs. and then he rushed to get his clothes from the cleaners.

and when you knocked at his door the breath that left your lungs struggled to come back after he opened the door.

he stood in a gorgeous suit, different than he had ever worn to work. he rubbed the back of his neck and gestured to the living room, revealing the adorable (albeit poorly made but its the thought that counts) decorations.

"um.. welcome to prom," he said, turning back to you, revealing a blushy smile.

he tried not to stare too much at you, but it was difficult. your eyes sparkled as you stepped inside and looked around. and the dress you were wearing fit you so gorgeously he truly couldnt take his eyes off of you.

"spencer, i..." you trailed off, enchanted by what he had done.

"sorry if it looks bad. or if you think its weird that i did this. i just thought cause neither of us went to prom maybe you wanted to have a little one with me? yeah now that i say it out loud maybe you hate it im sorr-" he rambled behind you.

you turned quickly to him as he got lost in his words, eyes glued to the floor. cutting him off by wrapping your arms around his neck and hugging him as tight as you could. you could feel the tension leave his body as he melted into the embrace, returning it gladly. he doesn't like to be touched by anyone really, except for you.

"i love it. thank you," you whispered, giving him one last squeeze before letting go.

he has a spread of snacks lying out on the coffee table which he has mooved to the corner of the room to make space for a makeshift dancefloor.

he turns on the music and you two start talking and dancing and laughing. two fools with four left feet completely and obliviously in love. well, oblivious the the other anyway.

a slower song came on, an old one that you had wanted to slow dance to ever since you were a little girl. and somehow naturally you two came together, his hand dropped to your waist, the other delicately cradling your own. your other hand found its way up to his shoulder, feeling as though a magnet was pulling you two closer. and closer.

he looked absolutely stunning. the soft lights he had strung around the apartment sparkled like stars in his eyes; its was...dizzying, in the most incredible way.

unbeknownst to you, as you stared at the stars in his eyes he was looking at his whole world that he had been somehow lucky enough to hold in his arms.

he held his arm out, allowing you to spin and when he pulled you back both of your arms ended up wrapped around his neck, and his around your waist. you were less dancing now and more...hugging. with your head pressed to his chest, he hoped with all his might that you wouldn't be able to hear his hammering heart. you most definitely could, but it was calming to know he was as nervous as you were. you smiled, listening more to his heart than the music he had played for you.

you were both sure that you could burst from pure bliss. the song ended a little too quickly for either of your liking and reluctantly you let go of each other. and suddenly Spencer was hit with the realization that he forgot something.

"oh my gosh," his eyes widened as he looked around the room.

"what?" you asked, mirroring him and looking as well.

"i can't remember where i left your corsage! i was gonna give it to you at the door but i forgot!" he exclaimed, running around the room checking shelves.

you smiled to yourself. he got you a corsage!

"ill help you look" you decided.

"please do," he chuckled.

"i thought you had an eidetic memory, shouldn't you know where you left it?" you joked, shooting him a smug smile.

"y/n, my brain was all jumbled to day and it wasn't just from being around you," he realized what he had said and quickly turned back to the shelf he was looking at, "could you check in my room please?"

his heart was racing at his own stupidity; how could he just say that so nonchalantly? he had been planning to tell you that he liked you for the longest time he cant afford slipping up and having it be anything less than perfect.

you slipped into his room, your cheeks warm from the idea that you make his big brain all jumbled. he probably didn't mean it like that, you were just looking too much into it.

you sighed as you crouched to look under his bed for it. you found a small wooden box that you slid out from underneath. it had your name on it.

is it normal to keep a corsage in a wooden box? you wouldn't know, you never went to prom.

you shrugged your shoulders, "i found it spence!"

with out thinking you opened the box, except instead of a band of flowers you were greeted with letters, all addressed to you. there were annotations written in the margins with purple ink. you furrowed your eyebrows as you scanned the various letters.

dear y/n,

today you complimented my glasses and my heart skipped a beat. thats dumb spencer dont start like that

dear y/n,

im in love with you. too forward

dear y/n,

you make life worth living. shes gonna think youre a creep

you felt a rush of euphoria fill your chest. did he really feel these things for you? your thoughts swirled in the most wonderful way. a wide smile broke across your face, butterflies running rampage through your stomach as you reread his words. his words addressed to you.

"oh thank God i really thought i lost-oh. oh no." spencer started as he walked through the door of his room immediately walking back out. you followed, blinking your watery eyes at him. "i can explain.

"i think youve explained enough, theres like 20 letters in here!" you chuckled, flipping through them.

"i didnt know how to tell you and i dont want to ruin what we already have and i-"

"it wasnt too forward." you stated, grabbing one of the letters.

"what?" he asked, dumbfounded.

"in this one," you held up the letter, "you wrote dear y/n, im in love with you. and then you crossed it out and wrote that it was too forward but i dont think it was."

"youre not mad?"

"mad? spencer ive been trying to admit the fact that im in love with you since i realized it myself, why would i be mad?"

"youre..you feel the same way?" he looked back up at you, a hesitant smile pulling on the corners of his lips.

"more so," you beamed, stepping closer.

he wrapped his arms around you, "thats good or else the rest of this prom would have sucked."

you chuckled, pulling him impossibly closer to you as another perfect song played.

-

-

ultra mega super cool taglist

@mac99martin @imhreid @spencersmagic @hollydaisy23 @raelady1184 @a-broken-pact @padfootswife @hey-there-angels @star-stuff-in-the-cosmos @sonnydoesrandomshit @averyhotchner @laurakirsten0502 @reidyoulikeabook @rem-ariiana @spencerreid9 @vampire-overlord @takeyourleap-of-faith @spenxerslut @violetspoetic @aperrywilliams @b-a-utiful @eevee0722 @srhxpci @reidemandweep @imdefinitelyfloating @random-human-person @gurkiloni @luvspence @calm-and-doctor @ssavanessa22 @singularityjc @sydnee-kom-spacekru @sydneekomspacekru

[vyl3tpwny]

volume sliders

my need for a tumblr volume slider feels like an edge case, because of the two facts of a.) i make music and usually require my monitoring to be at a certain level, and b.) i am forgetful and if that monitoring level gets changed i will often forget to change it back and then have a biased perspective of whatever im working on; — I never change any of the volume knobs on my system's end. i always rely on volume sliders for media like on youtube and twitter, especially because i tend to share my screen+audio frequently in calls & streams, so my monitoring levels wont even be parallel to what everyone else hears. i do have soundsource as a monitoring aggregate (this allows me to calibrate my headphones passively), but i dont really touch those either. occasionally i'll use it to double or triple my browser's volume so i dont have to change anything else, but i usually end up not remembering to change that a lot of the time. at the least, my browser's audio does not have to be super accurate for me to be doing my work.

at the same time though, playback controls for media seem to be really really poorly done a lot of the time. i obsess over these things and the smallest inconvenience usually pisses me off so much. recently ive been falling exhausted and upset by the issues that twitter has with its media playback. the timeline playhead is obviously very janky and rounds off to weird points. watching content longer than 20 seconds becomes a pain to scroll through if you want to. but the most damning thing is the volume slider.

i've shown this video several times on my own twitter, but this shit is unacceptably bad. this will happen to me so frequently and it will piss me off so much. lack of controls and optimization in any case just upset me, and i mean that genuinely. it's not slight annoyance, it's not light frustration; it pisses me off. my eyesight is relatively okay. my hearing is relatively okay. but if this stuff can hurt my brain this much, i can only imagine what kind of disappointment this yields in people with other accessibility needs. i shouldnt have to install some sort of app or plugin to make something work the way it's supposed to.

that said with tumblr. it really is awful theres not even the option for a volume slider. it would not be even remotely difficult to implement. but i suppose the issues are dispersed and decentralized.

now, i have a lot of problems with soundcloud's ui/ux, maybe i'll break that down sometime. but what i can appreciate is their volume slider. it really only shows up when you definitely actually want it there. it hides when you probably aren't actually tweaking it anymore. and you dont have to be super precise in order to change volume for stuff. you can see that you can kind of click anywhere nearby or slide anywhere nearby and it'll just understand what you're wanting to actually do. the fact that its so compact but also does not require precision is what makes it actually intuitive to use. another thing is the fact that it allows you to move your mouse horizontally, with great distance, means that it feels less cramped too. when dynamic controls like this force you into a narrow operating range, it feels kind of upsetting to use and a lot of people just end up opting to not use it.

ui/ux that makes you feel cramped is the worst shit ever. whats funny about this is that soundcloud's design actually feels cramped otherwise,,, but the idea is that their volume slider is at least intuitive and goes against the grain of the rest of that stuff.

anyway. i cannot adjust the volume controls from my system. it's too important for me to keep things the way they are at all times for my type of work, especially when im so forgetful. but i feel like there are lots of other people with particular use cases where a volume slider with general media is important to them too. and i feel like im not the only person that feels like they shouldnt be installing proprietary software in order to make something work the way it probably should. you know?

thanks

[ravysu]

Sannin headcanons and thoughts

The last thing I would like to post for the sannin week. It is still 24.04 here! :D @sannin-central

This is long. Spoiler alert. Mostly Orochimaru, some Tsunade, a little of Jiraiya (because his story is pretty clear and spoken and idk what I can add). Also I recommend to read this meta about Orochimaru, it has influenced me a lot and has some good points. Sorry for any posible grammar mistakes. Also I really should put here a lot of references to the manga or anime but it was something that was piling up for a year and I'm soooooooo lazy. After all, those are just headcanons. Also: Im not excusing Oro's bad stuff here, Im trying to understand the reasons.

Ive already posted some hcs, here, here and here.

1. First if all, the chronology pic of sannin lifetime based on the info i found on naruto wiki and also some statements about wars from this post. It was tough considering what a mess naruto’s chronology is.

2. Sannin story shows what it cost to be a legend. They're like Team 7 but more realistic. Tsunade literally carried the war but left with nothing and developed a ptsd and have problems to just live on. Also anger control issues. I think she can be pretty bossy and stubborn which is not always nice. Jiraiya is the hero of the day but also very idealistic and can ignore some important details in the real word whether its the fight (he always injured during flashbacks maybe because each time he took too much to handle and on the one hand it's heroistic but on the other is a mistake that can lead your team to situations like in that Iwa cave) or your friends issues (I bet he saw what's going on but thought it's fine until Oro actually got red handed and left). He lives in his world and may have problems to get out to see it through someone else's shoes. As for Orochimaru, it seems like he was a normal guy for 20+ years (I mean, he didn't do crazy criminal shit and had something good in him and it was stated somewhere that it was his teammates influence. It is obvious they considered him as a friend, I don't thinks it was for nothing) but we mostly know his darkest side. Despite being a moster he is a human that have empathy and some ordinary human traits (man just decorates every bit of an environment he is in lol).

3. Tsunade was the leader of team Hiruzen.

4. Tsunade sometimes hit Jiraiya for some stupid things he did or said but never touches Orochimaru even if he did something same. Jiraiya complained about it once and almost got another hit.

5. Jiraiya had problematic parents that didn't care about him much and a lot of time he was wandering in the streets.

6. Judging by the look of Oro bangs and hair, he sometimes cut it off. A stress relief huh? And the fact that he doesn't do it now in Boruto..

7. It was shown that Tsunade and Orochimaru was acknowledged before they become a team. Maybe they did just before, or maybe some longer time before. I prefer the second option and hc that they met because both had no real friends - Orochimaru seemed weird and scary for everyone and Tsunade was Senju so everyone wanted to hang out with her but didn't really care. They weren't seen as what they were - people put the labels on them. But they didn't care about each other's labels and actually saw each other in true lights.

8. Tsunade knew it was an accident and it's not right but still she blamed Orochimaru for Nawaki's death for some time. It was something that seriously damaged their friendship and the team. Orochimaru was mad but also guilty, after all, he was responsible at least as a shinobi since Nawaki was under his watch. So he started to act cold and emotionless and was trying to distance himself from his teammates.

9. Jiraiya was in Ame while Dan died.

10. The whole his orphans mission was a bit irresponsible tbh. They already fought Hanzo and as he stated the conflict between Konoha and Ame is going to an end with Konoha's win. It's weird to stay here for three years in the middle of the war while there were other lands to fight. He left his teammates for some idea. Maybe that caused another crack in their team friendship.

11. If Tsunade would have find a way to live on with her trauma and follow the will of fire and stuff it would affect Orochimaru as well just as her grief affected him. It's like he would get an example that you can live on with this pain. So death isn't above human capability and we are not just the slaves of mortality (sounds stupid but i dont know how else to describe sorry). But as we know what he actually saw is that it broke her crucially to the point she couldnt be herself again. And so the death is above everything.

12. Oro wasn’t just acting as a cold pragmatic bitch in that cave but also tried to save Tsunade. Jiraiya knew it and that’s why he showed this sign to him like "I see what youre doing here" and that stunned Oro because he would prefer to look rather like a cold pragmatic bitch hehe

13. Just a thought. People in the village probably treated Oro as a foreigner or just wouldnt accept him because he looked so differently and had a weird attitude. That's why he sometimes didn't feel that Konoha is his home. After the wars where people were treated as means and tools, even the children, he himself developed this view on people - he dehumanized them and used as the means to his goals, just as his village did. Funny thing some people were straightly dehumanizing him too like Ibiki thought that he was a demon (tho he was a child). And he probably weren't the only one. Anyways the point is that it's logical that Orochimaru don't care about anybody but some few people, he's the product of his era. He's like Naruto that would chose the hatred way. But naruto had some good and understanding people around him and.. Orochimaru had them too, but match how Iruka treated Naruto and this Hiruzen's "I sAw tHe mAliCe in This cHiLd fRoM tHe BegGinNinG". And oro didn't even have a big ass evil fox in him. sry i hate hiruzen

ANYWAYS the moral of the story is not "go criminal if they hurt you" but always treat people like people. Waving my hand to Kant.

14. The reason why Orochimaru didn't pick some good morals to stick with through the hard times no matter what (like, idk, Jiraiya or Naruto) is because 1) I think he is/was pretty depending on people around him 2) the war fucked him and his friends up too much (Nawaki incident + Tsunade) 3) twisted addictions (though I don't think he's that sadistic, we never saw him torturing randoms just for fun, it was always some science experimental shit. He tends to get fun out of cruelty only when it's personal) that maybe developed as a way to sublimate anger and sadness caused by his parents loss (that's what they share with sasuke - unlicke naruto, they knew their parents and it's other kind of pain. Sasuke developed a revenge issue and Orochimaru - cruelty pleasure which... is kinda the same but less epic and more occasional lol).

15. Speaking of that, Orochimaru cared for Sasuke because he saw himself in him.

16. Oro hold grudges against Hiruzen for not choosing him to be Hokage not only because he was ambitious and/or egoistic, but also because Hiruzen was some kind of a father figure for him and his approval was important tho i doubt he was aware of that. He also probably could tell that Hiruzen was suspicios about him when he was a child and that led to many conflicts and was hurting as well.

17. Tsunade knew things weren't pretty with Orochimaru after the wars but she never expected them to be this bad. During the week that she was given in her arc she thought not only about how much she wants to see Nawaki and Dan again despite how wrong would it be but also was trying to bury all the good memories she had left of Orochimaru so it would be easier to kill him.

18. She poisoned Jiraiya exactly because she knew he would not let her do it. Jiraiya was always hesitant to kill and inclined to forgiveness, while Tsunade, as mentioned by Orochimaru, could be merciless (so much so that he was not surprised when Kabuto suggested that she wanted to use Jira for Edo Tensei).

19. That was one of her traits that scared Jiraiya and fascinated Orochimaru.

20. Remember how Oro grabbed Jiraiya's neck when the latter was trying to cover with hair jutsu? On the snake, in Tsnade's arc. Orochimaru could have easily kill Jiraiya by pulling the sword out of the mouth (arteries are right there) but he didn't. As well as he could kill Tsunade when she was still shaking - just aim for the neck or the heart. Instead, he just injured her lung and kicked her which is not a big deal for the kind of shinoby like her at all.. Also he helped Anko not accidentally kill herself but it would be way much profitable to let her do it. "Orochimaru has no feelings".

21. The reason he suddenly wanted to kill Tsunade instead of forcing her to heal his arms as it was planned (which is weird since it will not going to get him heals and he kinda said that he wouldn't want to kill her just minutes ago) is that not only she refused to help him (he thought he could work it out) but she also prefered the village over him (from his point of view). Out if everyone she was the closest to being able to understand him since the village caused her painful losses too but nevertheless she agreed to be on it's side.

22. He wasn't fighting her back in the end partly because he thought he deserved that. Somewhere deep inside hahah.

23. Tsunade got a fear to develop deep bonds so they probably weren't very close with Shizune (also the way she knocked her down in this hotel.. oh).

24. Orochimaru will be here when she'll die.

25. Orochimaru's eng dub to Tsunade: "I often wondered what it would be like to ring that pretty neck yours". No comments.

26. Orochimaru is either bi/pan or ace. Anything or nothing lmao

27. Hiruzen knew about at least some of the Oro’s illegal experiments and was okay just as he was okay with the Foundation all the time. Because it’s useful. Then he has discovered he went too far OR he knew everything and oro just became too inconvenient because of his methods. The way Orochimaru tells Sasuke about reasons they are well treated as the criminals is based on in his experience with Hiruzen.

28. As you may know the lyrics in Orochimaru’s music theme goes “don’t talk with the silence of the heart”. It was taken from one Indian song that also had lines like “don’t question life too much”, ”pain arose somewhere in the chest”, “don’t speak to the wounds of the heart”. Though I’m not sure 100% because I was translating it with some hindi dictionary with like zero knowledge of hindi

29. I like to think that this “silence of the heart” theme and the fact that he called his village a hidden sound village are somehow connected. The hidden sound is the possible explanation of all things waiting to be listened to but the truth is silent and you know it deep in your heart and it bothers you. The world is silent just like the life is meaningless but people can only hear. *Sigh* anyways

30. Orochimaru’s journey is the one about accepting death. When he saw Karin released her chains while was trying to get to Sasuke he understood that the death is a part of human’s strength.

Can’t wait to feel that everything I wrote is wrong or not enough or stupid and obvious lol. Anyways, it’s something that I wanted to share until I move to some other fandom.

[ootahime]

what is utahime’s role in the future? — a prediction (manga spoilers)

part 2 (unedited)

part 1 is here!

let’s continue answering the question: is utahime weak?

chapter 135

what preparations is utahime making? like i’ve mentioned before, i theorize that she needs to charge up in order to use her technique. since momo and the other kyoto students are fighting on the front line to buy time for utahime, i believe that they trust that their teacher’s ability can help turn the situation around.

what do the students think of her? do they think she’s weak?

chapter 128

mechamaru manipulates the circumstances in a way that allow him to keep the kyoto people away from danger. this has more to do with how much he cares about his classmates and his teacher rather than seeing them as incompetent sorcerers who can’t hold their own. notice how he says “EVEN utahime”.

chapter 128

kamo thinks mechamaru doesn’t have that much faith in the Kyoto students—but this isn’t true at all! he knows who the enemy is and has a grasp of how dangerous they are. he just wants to keep his friends safe. besides, kamo is a semi-grade 1 sorcerer which means he’s more than capable of defending himself against curses. but since he’s being kept safe too, it suggests that this is not a matter of keeping weak people away from fighting :)

chapter 41

this seems a bit off topic but let’s talk about the misogyny in jujutsu society. momo points out to nobara that the women from the zenin clan are expected to be perfect. the misogyny runs so deep to the point where some women aren’t allowed to even fight. you may think that this is just about the zenin clan but it’s about society as a whole. that’s why nobara responds to momo in a more personal sense. she doesn’t care about the boys versus girls issue because she embraces all aspects of herself. she loves herself when she’s strong, and she loves herself when she’s dressed up and beautiful. if it only applied to the zenin family then nobara wouldn’t have responded the way she did.

in the chapter before, nishimiya explains, “even if a girl has skills, if she’s not cute, she’s looked down upon. of course, if she’s only cute with no skill, it’s the same. women sorcerers aren’t expected to be skilled, they’re expected to be perfect.”

some of the female characters in jujutsu kaisen apply to this. for example, maki and mai. they’re looked down upon because one can’t use a cursed technique or see curses, while the other’s cursed technique is weak. in chapter 148(?) naoya says the only thing maki had going for her was her face, but it’s ruined now so she’s nothing. the zenin twins fall under the “cute but not skilled” category in jujutsu society. before we can put utahime into a category, let’s examine mei.

i promise this will all connect so please bear with me LOLLL let’s move on to mei. we find out that mei has the ability to control crows. she deems this ability as weak because it’s simple and doesn’t have much attack or defense power.

she convinces herself that a sorcerer’s worth doesn’t revolve around their CT. by following this ideal, she soon found herself at her limit because you can only hone your physical abilities to an extent. she said she was crushed because she thought that her weak CT would forever stunt her ability to grow as a sorcerer. but because of all the training she did in order to not rely on her CT, she was able to combine her physical prowess with her technique to make what’s best of her ability to control crows.

mei is an example of a perfect woman based on the standards the jujutsu world has established for women. although she has a weak technique, she makes up for it with adept use of weapons and physical prowess. she found a way to incorporate this “weak” ability to make it something strong. she’s beautiful and powerful so therefore, she was promoted to be a grade 1 sorcerer. she is what a woman is expected to be in order to be acknowledged by others.

what about utahime? why couldn’t she follow the same footsteps as mei?

i can’t answer that because we don’t really know much about utahime so far. i can only speculate why. being a grade 2 sorcerer at 20 is not bad at all. but why is she stuck as a semi-grade 1 sorcerer at 31? that surely proves she’s just weak, right?

semi-grade 1 sorcerers are sorcerers who have performed well on missions with a person accompanying them. i feel like when utahime was on a mission to exorcise a grade 1 curse on her own (the final step of the grade 1 promotion process), something happened that gave her her scar and made her unable to fulfill the mission. it’s either that or she did complete the mission but her appearance is too unsatisfactory. can you recall what nishimiya said? if you’re cute and not skilled, you’re not good enough. if you’re not cute and skilled, you’re still not good enough.

in men, scars are a symbol of honor and strength. on the other hand, scars on a woman’s face are seen as an imperfection. as a result, those who are scarred are deemed imperfect and unsuitable for marriage.

gojo hates the way things are run because the higher ups are so close-minded. they make decisions on a whim and have no compassion for sorcerers who are breaking their backs on their orders. he wants to change jujutsu society for the better by raising the next generation of sorcerers to be as strong as him. the old-fashioned and narrow-minded attitude of the higher ups leads me to believe that utahime is stuck as a semi-grade 1 sorcerer because she is viewed as imperfect. utahime’s scar is most likely the reason contributing to her being held back. who would want to promote a woman who isn’t beautiful enough to be a grade 1 sorcerer?

she obviously has a lot to offer because she’s a teacher at Kyoto. todo, a grade 1 sorcerer, has never shown any sign of disrespect towards utahime despite the fact that he surpassed her in rankings. he trusts in her and believes she has some things she can teach him.

can we additionally address the fact that gojo respects mei? he refers to her as mei-san and says that there’s no way she’d cry because she’s strong. mei has a weak technique though? 🤔🤔🤔 controlling crows?!?!?! nah im jk, mei is strong with and without her technique, of course. since gojo respects someone like mei, a person who doesn’t have an out-of-this-world technique, i believe his view of someone strong isn’t solely based on their technique. when he calls utahime weak, he may not be insulting her CT. it’s just all jokes because in chapter 65, geto and mei join in on the fun too and pick on her. mr. hot shot knows that utahime is a valuable asset to his plans so he entrusts her with the task of unearthing the traitor(s). if she was so incapable of such a thing, why did he pay mei to do the same job? 🤔

*a lot of people think mei was actually paid by gojo to promote his students but that’s incorrect. it goes against everything gojo advocates for. he wants his kids to enjoy their youth because his was taken away. being a sorcerer is not a smooth job and no matter how many years you’re in the profession, it never gets easier. he doesn’t wish for his students to be thrust in a world full of hardship and loss, which is why he was so against yuuji and yuta’s execution. he works hard to preserve the innocence of his students. he doesn’t want yuji’s heart to break, not even once. why would he pay mei to promote his students to grade 1? that would automatically strip them of their innocence and youth and push them into a world full of burden and pain.

PHEW that was long. how does this all tie back to utahime’s future role in the story?

her CT will probably come in clutch in an important battle

she might be the one to help get gojo out the box (A REACH i know)

she will help gojo with his plan to overthrow and change jujutsu society as a whole

i don’t really have to dive into the first bullet point. as for the second one, look at what i found!

in the second opening, utahime is seen searching for something in a dim forest.

*i read an analysis about opening 2 and apparently this just symbolizes her looking for the traitors. that makes sense too.

in chapter 144, this scenery pops up right before they enter master tengen’s base(?) the branches are thicker than in the opening but it gives the same vibes to me. i think utahime will be the one to break gojo out.

why utahime? well, gojo is their best shot at stabilizing whatever the fuck is going on right now. she knows it’s a crime to unseal him, but she wants her students to be safe so she’ll probably risk it. plus, gojo’s flashback starts with him breaking utahime and mei out of a building with a barrier.  i think utahime breaking gojo out of the prison realm will make a perfect parallel :3

that theory is a massive ass pull I KNOW. it’s just fun to think about. it’s likely that kurusu hana will be the one helping yuuji and megumi out with that.

if utahime isn’t the one freeing gojo, she will definitely come face to face with the other traitors.

ive read numerous Reddit threads and tons of users think she’ll play a small role in the story—nothing too significant. i’m perfectly content with that as well. i never expected her to be gojo level or anything like that LMAOO. as long as we get to see her technique in action, i will be satisfied 😮‍💨

——

i feel like there may be a few things i missed but i tried to include everything i could think of. the organization of this post is quite off but im too lazy to rearrange it in a way that makes it more coherent LOL. thank you so much for reading. ill probably analyze gojo and utahime’s interactions in the manga and anime next :-)

[spencerhotchner]

Alternative {spencer reid}

Chapter 1 

summary: Since quarentine was announced, Y/N decided to rewatch all seasons of Criminal Minds. On a lonely night she wished she could be in that universe instead of this. What happens when she wakes up in 2008 in Quantico?

warnings: angst, a very confused reader, regular cm stuff and my grammar (if you find anything else pls lmk

word count: 2k

a/n: i have this idea while watching a movie about parallel universes and all, so i just wanted to try this out. it will be a 10 parts series! im not really sure about this, i think i kinda hate it but im posting it anyways lmao. i hope you gonna enjoy!

series masterlist

part 1 | part 2

You woke up feeling dizzy and with a major headache. At first you thought it was because you drank a whole lot of wine last night but then you saw yourself in a room you never saw before. You stoop up quickly trying to understand where you were and how did you end up there. You were sure that you have never been in this place before, and it was scaring you that you showed up in there.

There was a mirror nailed to the wall in from of you almost forcing you to look at your own body, that made you notice that you were still wearing the same clothes from last night, but you weren’t home. Not being home was odd given by the fact you stayed there with your family and two friends you invited over, since there’s a whole freaking pandemic going on and you for sure did not want to get sick or get other people sick. 

“Did I get kidnapped?” you think out loud. “No, I just watch too much Criminal Minds.” you tell yourself, trying to calm down.

You reach for the face mask placed on the nightstand, getting ready to leave this random place and go home. You tried not to freak out when you realized your phone was gone and the only cellphone in there was probably as old as your grandmother. You dialed your moms number about five times and all of them went on voicemail, making you curse mentally. 

This can’t be happening. Not to me.

As soon as you leave the apartment you were in you realized you weren’t in your hometown, definitely not. It was crowded, like, really crowded and no one was wearing any face masks. Where did the freaking pandemic go? You wondered while you felt like a misfit for being the only one wearing it. 

“Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?” you ask an old lady walking by.

“You’re on Main Street, sweetheart.” she says.

“No, um, I mean the city.” you watched as the old lady looked at you with a funny face, as if she was calling you crazy on her mind.

“We’re in Quantico, dear.”

“Quantico?” you repeat, mostly for yourself then for her. The lady started at you like you were an alien. “Thank you so much, ma’am.”

The air started to go low on you, how did you get to Virginia, anyway? That was across the country from where you lived, Bellevue in Washington state. You started lost walking, trying to understand what the hell was going on. It felt like you were on a parallel universe, like you were in a dream but couldn't wake up and it sure felt very real. You stoped a jornal shop taking a lot at the last newspaper in there, trying to figure if something happened that you were missing. However, nothing reported there shocked you, what did, though, was the date. 

July 1st, 2008

You were about to ask someone about it when you bumped into a blonde woman, falling on the ground. As soon as you looked up, you almost chocked yourself. If the day was already weird, this was even weirder. A.J Cook was standing right in front of you with a concerned look. You couldn't really say anything, just staring at her like she wasn't real. It was weird seeing her in front of you after only seeing her through screens. 

“I’m so sorry!” she said as she offered a hand for you to get up. “Are you ok?”

“I- um, yes! I’m fine.” you san, getting the dirt out of your outfit. “I’m a big fan of yours! Wish I had my phone here to take a picture but- sorry.“ you stoped talking, realizing she probably doesn’t care.

“Big fan of me? Wow, howcome somebody’s a fan of me?” she sounds surprised.

“Well, you’re on Criminal Minds.” you say as it was obvious. 

She looked at you as if you were out of your mind. Not that you weren't thinking otherwise at the moment, anyways. 

“I’m on what now?” she asked.

Maybe you got confused and she was the wrong person, but she looked so much like her to not be her. If they were not the same person, then definitely twins. This was so weird, once again, you found yourself asking ‘what the hell’ mentally.

“You’re JJ, Jennifer Jareau, FBI Agent and all.” you say, trying one more time. “Behaviour Analysis Unit...”

“Yea, that‘s me.” she let a nervous laugh comes out of her mouth. “How do you know me?”

‘This is weird’ you thought. How does she not understand where you know her from? Literally Criminal Minds, like you said at first. ‘Maybe this is all a dream.’

“I saw you on tv” you try.

“Oh, I see! You like law enforcement?” she asks you.

“Oh yes, I’m in law-school to be a judge someday.” you answered. “The show, all of it just makes me wanna put all them bad guys in jail.” you say, laughing a bit. 

“The show...? What?” you hear her whisper, but decide to ignore it. “What’s the mask about?” JJ asks, making you look at her surprised.

“Um, covid-19?” you say like it’s obvious, because it is.

“Oh, sure...” she smiles as she says it, almost like she's only agreeing because she won't discuss it. “Great talking to you, really, but I gotta go, FBI duty calls.” she jokes.

You smile at her watching carefully as she picks up her phone from her pocket and pick up a call. That phone looked awfully old, like 2000’s old. Why would a famous actress have that kinda of phone? Then, you looked around trying to understand more about what was going on. It was all too out of place.

First, nobody wearing masks, not even a single person but you. Second, you were in a city in which is miles away from your own. Third, a famous actress acted like she’s nobody. And fourth, the date on the calendar said 2008.

If it wasn’t just impossible I would say I time travelled into Criminal Minds universe.

After standing there for literal 10 minutes trying to figure it out what you were going to do, you decide to go to the police department. After all, you may have been abducted, right? Because you didn’t have any knowledge of the place, you took quite some time to get there. As soon as you got there you sigh in relief, that has been quite a walk and damn, you were tired of this situation. 

“Excuse me, ma’am, can you help me?” you ask to the lady standing behind the counter.

“Sure, dear. What do you need?” she looks up at you, taking her glasses of her face.

“I think I might have been abducted?” you start. “I woke up in this random apartment.”

“Maybe you had a one-night stand.” she said putting back her glasses.

“No! I am sure I didn’t because first of all, there’s a pandemic going on, second of all I was in Bellevue in Washington state when I went to sleep.” you yell, involuntarily, desperate to make her believe in you. 

“Miss, I’m gonna need you to calm down or you will be escorted out of the building. You’re probably on drugs, there's nothing we can do for you.”

“Fuck you.” you say as you watch her face get all red.

Frustrated. That could define what you were feeling, scared and worried could do the work, as well. What were you going to do now? Go to the FBI to see if they could freaking understand why you simply appeared in Quantico? Didn't sound like a bad idea in your mind as you decided to just try it out. After all, you were already pretty screwed up, it would worth a shot.

You reached for your back pocket, hoping that the money you shoved in there more than a week ago would still be in there. Bingo! You pull out a 20 dollar bill out of it and the next thing you know you’re getting into a cab asking him to take you to the FBI. Now that’s something you never thought would happen. The travel was quite quick, in 20 minutos you were standing in front of that big isolated building. It looked like it was taken straight out of your favorite show, that was insane. 

The wind blew hard on you when you got out of the vehicle, making you shiver a little, that reminded you that you did not have any clothes nor money to buy more. God, you did not even have where to go. You didn't even get the chance to get into the building as a big man steps in front of you, blocking your way. 

“Miss, you're not allowed in this building.” he said without much expression. 

“But, sir-” you started, as you saw he was about to interrupt you, you go on. “Ive been abducted and I don't know where or how the hell did I get in here, I’m completely hopeless... Please.” you beg him.

He started at you for a couple of seconds, that felt like centuries for you, just to sigh at you.

“Ok, follow me.” he said. “Do not make me regret this.” 

“I-I won’t, sir.” you were quick to answer. 

The agent asked another man to cover up for him as he led me into the building. Once again you found yourself admired of how much it did look like a Criminal Minds episode in there, if you weren't totally desperate you'd be amused. Soon, you two were out of the elevator on floor 8, leading with the words Behavior Analysis Unit quite big. 

“Can you take her to Agent Jareau, please?” the man said to someone who passed by, who simply agreed. 

Now, that's a funny coincidence, there's actually an Agent Jareau in the BAU. 

You followed the woman with questioning trying to stay calm when you saw Matthew Gray Gubler sitting on a desk reading some book in Reid style, almost like he was Spencer himself. If you had any doubts you were going crazy, that was the final proof. You stoped walking, taking a stare at him and then at the Agent that stared a you like you were an alien.

“Is there something wrong?” she asks you. “Miss, are you ok?”

You were unable to answer for a few seconds when you finally opened you mouth, still trying to figure it out how to say what was on your mind without sounding completely insane.

“Is that Dr. Spencer Reid?” 

And that was all you’re able to say because as soon as you let his name out of your mouth he looked up at you, trying to somehow recognize you. You were sure, that time, that you never looked - and sounded - as insane as right now. 

“Yes, that's me.” he answers. 

His voice was the last thing you could hear before everything go black. Maybe you were finally going to wake up. Maybe.