#ive had a few dreams like that
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1. How do you like your coffee?
2. What is your preferred form of transportation?
3. What was your most vivid dream, if you’re comfortable sharing?
Ooooo
1. I make pot coffee, going to cafes is intimidating. Cameron's is fire, but I'm liking chestnut hill also. Half coffee, half milk, like 4-5 teaspoons of sugar. Don't come for me, it used to be more until I realized I wasn't stirring it properly
2. I can't drive !!! But I like being a passenger. I rode a bus for the first time in NY, twice, and after the scariness of not knowing how to do it right, actually riding in the bus is nice. School bus nostalgia idk. I like seeing things go by really fast and seeing people get off to live their lives
3. Hoo boy. I'm a Nightmare Haver, and most of them are Subnautica themed, with TWDG as a second place holder. I have quite a few. There's one, though, that I think takes the cake. I'm in this tiny little pod in moderately shallow Subnautica waters(but it's always Off in some way, it always is). I go off to get some materials in this disgustingly creepy and dark purple cave system nearby, with these very long morray eel-like monsters. When I come back, there's a reaper near my pod, and I rush in while it starts fucking things up. Cracking hallways, windows. I barely escape, and just kinda swim at the surface for a while when I come across a building similar to what you'd find in the game Raft. There's some notes, something about the person going to find help. The water rises too high and I go underneath it, where there's a massive settlement into a rock cliff. Completely empty and wrecked. There's some smaller shark-like creatures swimming around. I go in the largest glass dome through a tiny laddered pipe, and after some sifting through papers there's a huge creature that was supposedly there the whole time, like the black creature of the crystals in Subnautica 2. I barely escape, and by then it's night time. I wade back to my old pod on the surface, bc the water is pitch black, and I hear all sorts of roaring and screeching below me. I wake up when something's coming from the bottom
#gornack ask tag#gornack ask game#ive had a few dreams like that#one where im fishing in an ice field with someone. and to get the fish i have to dive#but when i dive the boat disappears. i look down and this massive xenomorphic creature is coming up#i woke up in a panic and drew it. if i hadnt drawn it i wouldve forgotten everything#i still remember it
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the final phrase of my last sentence / hangs in the air, sounding stupider and stupider
#THE LINK IS MY BIRDRICK PLAYLIST. LISTEN TO IT PLEASEEEEE#rick and morty#birdrick#rick sanchez#rick c137#oh my GOD i struggled w the colours on this one. im SOOOO bad at colours man 😭😭😭😭😭 bane of my life#idgaf if this isnt how it happened in the actual scene. imagery over truth#if it bothers u ummm imagine its a dream or smth.#had to take dreadful reference pics of myslef for this. worth it#i might change the playlist art at some point to smth more fitting but idgaf i just want to show ppl now#and ive wanted to draw this for a whileee now lol#BUT YEAHHHHH. LISTEN TO MY PLAYLIST BOY#artsbotz#oh my god ok im not makinga ny more tiny edits. POST#COMPLETELY FORGOT TO TALK ABT THE PLAYLIST LOL#urmm hopefully its kinda clear which pov each song is. except a few kinda mixed ones#it goesssss all the way from them meeting up until like. s5 ending kinda#apologies again for all the csh. youll have to cope im afraid#its vital listening. listen to twin fantasy btw. btw
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toodeee
everything is transient. only an easy to draw guy is forever
#gorillaz#2d#stuart pot#gorillaz 2d#admin draws#fanart#needed a palate cleanser from my current fixation. came back to my roots#lore that i dont really get to talk about a lot outside of dms is that gorillaz is like a cornerstone of my art lol esp post 2018#ive had 4 main inspirations which are gorillaz phases 2-3. soul eater. homestuck. and a friend of mine. he knows who he is.#come to think of it 2018 is in some ways the year i really started drawing. 3/4 inspirations walked into my life that year#bc of this when i went to make a separate blog for art it became part of my username. slav-hewlett#ive had several dreams in which jamie hewlett just is there and gives me art advice and a few kind words. damon is usually there too#theyre a pack deal do not separate etc. those dreams are always really nice.#contrary to how much i draw 2d mudz is my favorite. its just that dear ol stu is very fun and much easier to draw#i should give murdoc a fair shot though. now that ive got the chops. theres been attempts thru the year but none were posted
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Not once have I seen anyone mention/bring up that Arthur Fleck is one of the few fictional men we have had that is not racist, misogynistic, sexist, feels his emotions, and is kind and respectful to women in his fantasies and in his reality
#joker 2#joker: folie à deux#arthur fleck#im saying this and i know im right which makes even more zero sense why incels even liked him#and it makes sense for people to hate the second movie because they had the expectation of seeing the joker but no#this movie viewed more of his world in his head now the movie made it clear if it was a day dream or reality#we got to have a insight into his mind which i feel many didn't care to see which again proves the mass hatred and correlation to projection#easily best movie ive seen this year i literally felt my entire body and spirit change. it felt like a turning point in my life#had to meditate a little bit then i got dinner and called a friend for a few hours to talk about the movie#but yea. this movie literally proved layers of points that literally caused a replication of actions in reality#i have a lot more to say but imma cap it off here like good night🍹
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Did you like the new ending :3 (fuck the old one)
I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!!!! It's the best logical way the dsmp could've ended AND because it's so open-ended, it leaves a lot of room for the fandom to build on, which isn't something you see a lot in media nowadays.
HOWEVER, it has been really bothering me these past few days since it was released, and I've had complex feelings about it that I haven't really been able to figure out until somewhat recently. Though, this is probably just me lol!
I'm gonna try to make this as short and legible as I can, but as you know I'm so very bad at that so sorry in advance.
Dsmp has been my main source of entertainment and an escape from just life in general since I first started getting into it—which was back in mid-2020 or so, but that was less of dsmp itself and more of the fandom. Though I still really enjoy the content creators content itself, I've watched them less and less and on the occasion that I see a clip or quote by them (especially Tommy) it's SO jarring how much they've changed and matured, and it's only a reminder of how I've done the same. That's the feeling I got when seeing the new lore. Everything has changed, people have matured, relationships have drifted apart, and we are living in the present.
It's like the feeling of finding an old toy that you distinctly remember loving so very much way back then and realizing you feel indifferent to it now. You've changed, your taste of things you enjoy changed, your relationships with people have changed, and you've grown.
I don't want to go back but I don't want to stop reminiscing, and this ending has made me realize that.
#this is very poorly explained and the point of just how much ive been focused on the past of dsmp and avoided the future isnt emphasized#as much as i want but i already stayed up for an hour staring at the ceiling trying to put my feelings into words before writing a HUUGGEEE#and messy paragraph into my notes app just a few nights ago so i think this is fine for now#i might come back and try to word it better but the feeling hasnt fully gone away yet so#also i just realized this may come off as a vent but ITS NOT!!! I SWEAR#its just like having a bucket of ice water dumped on my head suddenly#also that last line is so ctommy#am i a ctommy kinnie??#i mean it IS true that i didnt used to be this angry#but i think that just comes with becoming a teenager#so very sorry for the rant i just had to say it and your the perfect victim#<- cdream to ctommy:#dream smp#dsmp#tommyinnit#jack manifold#ctommy#ctommyinnit#cjack#cjack manifold#cbitterduo#cbitter duo#crazed raccoon chitters#my super cool moots !!
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here together
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#lobotomy corp spoilers#lobotomy corporation spoilers#abram lobcorp#i didnt know that the song that plays during day 48 ending is called 'here together'.#couldnt hear it well because i typically have my sound low (sensetive to louder sounds) and also the dialog fucked me up#so when i pressed on it to hear it. to actually listen to it. then to see the name and remember what it Looked like#i got teary eyed. sorry.#it happened quite. afew times when finishing this shitty thing#i was thinking of how camren's not quite corpse looked as if it were reaching out to him inside the container#how it looked as if she had wings. abrams words. the line from one story that was--#something like 'we were hoping it was just one big prank and she would hop out fro. around the corner with a smile on her face'#how do you move forward when all you think you cause is pain? when everything else youve done only brought to bring people you love to thei#downfall and demise inside agony and fear as they lay dying. none of that was merciful. none of that was just. they were told to carry on#her dream and he views as if all he had done was to become cruel and wasnt fit and never even began to finish what she started.#it was so striking to me. the language he used. sleeping. alseep. waken. when all the others never sugarcoated it#in lobcorp they always said it straight. 'suicide' 'killed' 'dead'. but he used something far more.. peaceful? kind in wording in a way.#softer. describing death as if it were a merciful thing. an end that suits them and not something to be afraid of. to just... sink. to slee#to be with carmen again. to put everything to an end#the place they built with their hands. to have it just... stop. not in a way of repeating and staying in the moment#but of a permanent end. to 'sleep'. to die. to just.... stop. forever. to see no more. to do no more#to not be able to do Anything for when ever he had done Something it just cause agony. cruel hands partaking in acts he so deeply#regrets. everything is just regret. it sounds nice. to move on. to just move forward. but how can you move forward when all you think you#bring to those you cherished and couldnt leave behind is pain?#ill likely move this somewhere else as well. ive been meaning to talk about abram#the rest as well actually. mostly just the few final days w abel adam and abram since i am STUCK ON DAY 49#oh dear i uh typed a lot in the tags. oops
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up next on illustrating my dreams: high school friend turns self into werewolf using underground fight club beserker ritual, you (werewolf by birth) come across him and are understandably horrified by this
#the actual dream was SO chaotic#werewolves#werewolf#my art#i turned into a werewolf unexpectedly bc i forgot it was a full moon while taking a friends two dobermans for a walk#and this guy. we shall call him Abe. rocks up like HEY LOOK WHAT I CAN DO NOW and turns into this beast#it is important to know that i had been keeping my lycanthropy a SECRET from him#and saw the full moon. went oh shit. lost control of the dobes again and turned into a more regular wolf#this is like. the fourth werewolf dream ive had? in the past few months
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Okay I'm ready now
#its not perfect but im done workinf on it#idk. is this good? idk it was supposed to be funny but idk#and goes without saying ill have to wait a few years until im ready to listen to this song again lolll#i am having so much fun making these though. really this is the dream ive wanted to make amvs since i was like 12 but i never had the means#well actually i made one when i was like 13 but that's it. back when you could download shit off youtube for free#i downloaded so many clips of jean havoc onto my dads laptop lol. i wonder if he ever found them. it was his work laptop too tehee#farscape#farscape john#john crichton#farscape scorpius#johnscorpy? jorpy? do they even have an official name loll#suckers and fuckers?#amv#sir i protest i am not a merry man
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You were spilling all my will out I was bleeding my last brains It's nothing like the nothingness That normally numbs one's pain
Goodbye, oh goodbye
some closeups for you
#almost forgot to put tags#pathologic#pathologic 2#my art#pathologic albino#albino pathologic#ill keep my ramblings IN THE TAGS this time .#oomf finished patho2 and we had a long conversation about how the albinos feel like. wasted potential for what they SEEM to symbolize#in the nocturnal ending anyway#this art is of the diurnal ending if that isnt. clear#because TO ME#what they symbolize is. a dying culture. and that seems. like its true? and not just “oh this is how i felt about them”#but some people are bigger pathoheads than me so idk#but they had been presented as fictional or a part of artemy's mind#as theyre first shown in the tumbler human#then the dream#but yknow when things get so unbelievably desperate they have to get out of hiding#and come out of hiding i mean literally cuz i like to think they went into hiding deep in the abattoir#sorry if i am just explaining stuff that is very blatantly in the game . ive been thinking about this for the last few days#let me feel smart okay#“give the albinos a voice” is very on the nose#IN A GOOD WAY!!!!! [SPONGEBOB ROCK FALL IMAGE]#in a WONDERFUL way actually. when i think about the kin too much i start crying#HENCE#THIS DRAWING#i wanna draw some herb brides soon. maybe nara
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So I had a dream about wincest(being obsessed with each other as always lol)
I was half asleep when I wrote this so bear with me
So I had this dream where some monster essentially got to sam and manipulated his world into his like ideal world. And his ideal world was him being a kid again with Dean taking care of him, just them in this little house. The same perfect day played over and over again, like a time loop. And somewhere outside this house is the real Dean, caught a time loop of his own, as he continously breaks into this little house to try to get to Sam and free him. But this monster always gets to him first and catches him off guard. It's like he doesn't remember the last time he was in the house, like it always feels like the first time setting foot in it, because the creature uses the same move over and over to kill him(but like, he doesn't really die, its more like this world is its own little pocket dimension and every time dean dies he wakes up outside of it again). And ever time, kid Sam hears something, but the monster/kid Dean tells him it's ok and they ignore it.
By the way, the monster in my dream is basically like this black-grey sentient goop(think Venom) that can morph itself into anyone it wants, and is hanging in weird strands all around the house that Sam doesn't notice. But dean does, and even though he tries to avoid stepping in it, it always catches his foot and essentially Webs his hands and gun in place, disarming him, then slams him against a glass mirror or a wall hard enough that it kills him.
Anyway, somewhere outside of this loop, Dean is vaguely aware that this monster always catches him with the same move, and the only reason he dies every time is because the surprise attack makes him too unsteady to shoot it, and catches him at a point where his footing is off, so he's easy to take down. But every time he enters the house again, he forgets what he learned, and it takes him down all over again. He admits to someone unseen that the reason it takes him down so easily/catches him off guard is because he's alone, aka Sam's not there to help him.
At some point, Sam starts becoming more aware that something is off, and that things are too perfect.
This is where the dream gets kind of fuzzy, but essentially Sam becomes aware enough and, still as a kid, sees adult dean walking through the house and calls out to him, confused. This time, Dean sees Sam and looks utterly relieved and says "Sammy..." like he's so happy to have found him. But this distraction causes the monster to catch him off guard again. It catches his foot and grabs his hands in its weird goo, but Sam is here now, and he sees this creature for the first time. So he yells out to Dean to move a certain way that gives him enough leverage to shoot the creature(this was mentioned as something dean always knew would help but always forgot when in the house).
Meanwhile, the monster actively tries to get into Sam's mind again and tell him, as young Dean, that everything will be ok so long as he let's him kill this intruder who's trying to hurt them. Finally it stops working on Sam and he becomes his real age again.
Some fight happens in between that I didn't really get to see, but the outcome was this: they managed to hurt the creature by working together, now that Dean wasn't alone, he doesn't die and actually gets some good shots in. At some point, Sam rushes the thing and the only reason it doesn't hurt him is because it grew some sort of attachment to him during the whole thing, and so he's the only one that it would let kill it(feels like a metaphor for Sam and Dean's real codependent obsessive relationship).
Anyway I don't remember much after this so that's basically all I have, so yeah.(also ignore any typos, I didn't edit this. I just woke up)
#also after they kill the monster someone mentioned something about it only letting sam kill it because he was like the mother to it#and dean was the father???#i didn’t add that in cause it doesn't really make any sense but yk. it was a dream so.#anyway#i dont go here#ive just watched a few episodes and like wincest as a ship#so take this as you will#if i had enough creative energy i would write a fic about this in great detail#but i dont so#maybe one of you can write something about it#wincest#samdean#weecest? technically??#weecest#i was gonna tag other main tags but i realized that would attract the wrong people#so im keeping it to the shipping tags#proship#for good measure#aml dreams#aml speaks#if my friends see this. no you dont.#pinning this post so i can come back to it when i write the fic for it lol
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highly recommend watching rocky horror if you are experiencing any form of gender crisis
#saw it for the first time this weekend....... ogh#'youre crying from rocky horror?' the 'dont dream it... be it' part got to me what can i say#is it any surprise my (mostly) fun-hating dad spent a lengthy amount of time criticizing it. he didnt hate it though#it was more like he just didnt get it. he was like it just doesnt make sense......#like well sorry its fun. hope this helps#him saying the song quality drops off after the first few numbers as if hot patootie isnt one of the bangers of all time#anyway my new years resolution before the new year has even started is to get gayer with it. how? we havent decided yet#i think like next halloween though ive gotta go see this in theaters with a bunch of people and have the full experience#also. susan sarandon im free every night of the week. not that i needed this movie to say that ive been like this but it needed to be said#and in conclusion. just a really fun time was had
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fuck, bears in trees were right. i stayed for tea and you know what? it did do wonders for me. and my friends? they do keep me safe.
#its been a rough few weeks#but today my friend invited me over for tea bc she noticed i hadnt been to lectures in a while#and it was the best hour ive had in a while#i felt so safe and warm and loved with her#id forgotten what that felt like outside me dreams#and then when i got home another friend messaged me asking if i was okay bc she hadnt seen me in a few days#and though i said id just fallen behind a bit and didnt go into mental health details#she said to let her know if theres anything she could do#im so emotional rn#love is inevitable even when you dont believe youre deserving of it#listening to my BiT playlist and crying of everything at once#damn#musicposting#bears in trees#*outside my dreans
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Deltarune podfic im super proud of still that i posted ages ago n forgotta crosspost here 👍 ft the lovely @parasiteking and @officialgleamstar :D
#deltarune#podfic#my art#the fic is so strange n theres literally no charas tagged so im not taggin any here akjwerkjwek#i genuinely love this fic alot its rlly pretty. like how the podfic came out alot :)#i editted the soundscaping like 5 times across a few days before finishin it akwerkjawejk so many rain sound effects...#shout out ta the person who fell asleep while listenin ta this one n had its raining somewhere else in their dream LOL.#not the first time ive haunted someones dream...
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actually im curious because ive always Heard this but i get so confused when i hear it bc im like. i know for a fact thats not true. two nights ago i had a dream where i read a dudes band shirt and tried to compliment it i even remember what band it was it was allegaeon. so im tilting my head about it and putting it up to the polls
#ive had a few times where i couldnt read the thing exactly but got the material anyway#but like? i Have read in my dreams before. very clearly.#so looking it up and seeing people go 'you cant actually' is like. are you gaslighting me or am i a unicorn#veespeaks
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a fun fact about me is when i sleep on my back a ton of air gets trapped in my stomach & occasionally makes me dream about food
[ID: a sequence of four simple drawings featuring an anthro fly dude. the sequence shows him asleep in bed, with his belly slowly swelling up. as this happens, dream bubbles show that he's dreaming of eating until his belly is enormously bloated, until he finally wakes to discover that his belly is actually bloated in real life, although not as much as in the dream.]
#art#belly kink#stuffing#stuffed belly#inflation kink#air inflation#inflated belly#tummy kink#xhowiex#when i got top surgery this happened like to such an extreme extent#not the dream part but the bloating#like when i woke up i probably had more air in my stomach than ive ever had in my life#it was horrible & i couldnt burp until they finally let me get up to go to the bathroom#i straight up felt like my stomach was going to explode while i was laying there#& then the few months i had to sleep on my back & couldnt roll over for relief were rough too#never as bad as that first time waking up after surgery#but basically just like every single night my stomach filling up until it couldnt anymore & id have to wake up
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im going to bed
youtube
heres a song i like goodnight
#......................#.............................................#..............................................................................#thats probably enough of a buffer.#last night i dreamed i was in the hollow below the tree that my body was in. when i woke up in the morgue all i wanted to do was curl up#my bones remember i think. even if i dont. sometimes i feel a phantom emptiness on my chest#like the arrows. like the knives.#its scary. its so scary.#im just a kid#will i remember it forever? how long will it haunt me?#people die all the time. people die and come back. people die and come back and they remember but it doesnt haunt them#i was trapped in death and i think thats... its not gone. maybe it is magically but i still feel it.#all i had for so many months was the vague knowledge that i was dead and this overwhelming sense of sharp coldness#my body remembers. i remember. how does anyone forget things like this? i dont want this. i dont want to remember.#i like it under my bed. ive put pillows and blankets down here. the vent that blows in cold air is here too so it feels comfy#and maybe it reminds me of being under the tree. and i dont know why but thats something im actually okay with#my body was under something for so long. the soil was cursed but i loved those woods. i miss the woods. my body hurts.#my mom is missing a leg and sometimes she talks about phantom pains. like her leg realizes it isnt there and screams#can you feel that way about a hole in your chest and your neck. can you feel that way about a tree above you.#can you feel that way about death#maybe i should get angry. but alone. so so alone so i dont hurt anyone.#i cant prove him right. because he was wrong and everything he ever said was wrong and he sucks and i hate him#im not like him.#im like gertie and my parents.#im so tired. im so tired. i want to sleep in dirt for a few more months. maybe sort myself out somewhere dark and quiet.
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