#thats probably enough of a buffer.

[sorrowsaint]

im going to bed

heres a song i like goodnight

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

rewatching 13s era for me is not so much diminishing returns as it is something opposite and eviler...............increasing losses? increasing losses

[liminevator]

[We are aware of the current deficiencies with the current denizen file system and are currently busy working to improve them, with our file manager Eskobar overseeing the changes of course.]

[Update continues below.]

--

[One of these improvements is a letter ranking system to help better identify the potential risks your fellow denizens may pose to you or the lack thereof- remember, always be careful of who you trust.]

[This new letter ranking system is as follows]:

D-rank - D rated Denizens are effectively just your average joe schmoe, they don't usually have powers, and if they do they usually aren't offensive, or are simply so impractical theres very little ways if any to be harmful. A good example of a D-rank denizen would be ID #2200

C-rank - C rated Denizens are much similar to D-rank however the biggest difference is they do have substantial abilities that could be harmful in the wrong hands, but thankfully C-rank denizens are typically the example of powers "in the right hands" so-to-say. A good example of a C-rank denizen would be ID #0004

B-rank - B rated Denizens are basically the "middle of the road" tier. They aren't exactly harmless, but they're not exactly dangerous either, it's difficult to explain, essentially another you know it when you see it type of situation. A good example of a B-rank denizen would be ID #0325

A-rank - A rated Denizens are those whose scale is tilted a bit more into the dangerous direction, whether this violence is intentional or not they are known to be unstable and have outbursts that may result in serious injury or even death, it's not recommended to bother them if you can help it. A good example of an A-rank denizen would be ID #0115

S-rank - S rated denizens are few and far between, but are a force to be reckoned with nonetheless. They're violent, destructive, and disregard any attempts to stop such behavior, either finding it fun or necessary or for other reasons. The ways to handle them are different for each individual, remain wary and on your toes. A good example of an S-rank Denizen would be ID #1000

U-rank - "U rank" is a very seldom given title, often reserved solely for those with deific powers, or those who have fragmented (fragmentation is further indicated by a ☥ symbol by the name.) It is highly ill advised to seek out anybody with this label unless you absolutely know what you're doing, or are operating under my orders. A good example of a (non-fragmented) U-rank denizen would be ID #4444

[The rest of these improvements are more minor things, including but not limited to]:

- Changed "Distinct Marks" into "Distinct Traits" to reflect its current usage

- Slightly more detailed descriptions for Hair and Fur besides just the color

- New description section for a denizen's Skin where applicable

- Mr. CocoCoolatta is working on new art for some of the more "scuffed" files that "look like shit"- its words not mine

- For Phonians only, adding the "Song" category to properly document the tune of applicable denizen's phonoglands

- Touching up some files with more lackluster descriptions where necessary

- Removing unsavory edits made by... "third parties" that will only remain visible to higher ups in The Archive

- Urging Professor Radiant to change his password so these edits stay private

[And one final note, my apologies for the radio silence lately and lack of updates to our database, things have been busy in our facilities lately and it's gotten in the way of proper procedures around here. But not to worry, I assure you this is only temporary, we will be back on our feet soon enough, so long as I have anything to say about it.]

Sincerely, Doctor Rito Kusatta

[woodlandwizard77]

A Step by Step Guide to Losing Your D**k

I recently wrote a series of messages to my aunt talking about all the steps I need to do to get bottom surgery, a penile inversion vaginoplasty at Mt. Sinai, in the next year or two. Its a long list. And everytime I added something she had a sort of “wow thats rough” reaction, but to me its just the to do list. So I decided to write them all out.

Start transition DONE

Most insurance companies and surgeons require you to have socially transitioned and have done HRT for at least 1 year at the time of operation

For social transition, this was March of 2024

For HRT it will be January of 2025

Get a referral to a surgeon (I am here)

In my case, Mt. Sinai in Manhattan

My Doctor referred me, but Mt. Sinai takes self referrals

Start laser hair removal

Book a consultation (I am here)

Go to laser frequently enough to satisfy surgeon

Convince Mom and Dad to help out DONE

Get 2 letters

Social Worker (1)

PCP's Office

Social Worker (2)

Mt. Sinai

Get a gender affirmation loan through the local credit union

Work two weeks so I can take in pay stubs

Get a letter from anybody (probably my HRT prescriber

Meet with representative and either open a line of credit or take out a loan

Consultation with Mt. Sinai’s team

Wait 3-6 months (I’m here)

Bring letters

My insurance only requires 2, less than Mt. Sinai thinks insurance will need, and Mt. Sinai provides 1 of them. Meaning the other is through IHS Behavioral

Schedule Social Work pre surgical consult appt

Schedule Mental Health and Medical Clearance with Registrar

Go to NYC for 1-2 nights, maybe for each, hopefully just once

Maybe also for Social Work thing

Consult with Surgeon

Wait until I’ve worked about 12 months to get short term disability

Probably summer (ASAP) and when Mom has time off

Do logistics

Book an airbnb, hotel, etc for recovery

Starting a few days after OR date and lasting a little over a month

Within a 90 minute drive of Mt. Sinai

Rural enough that Mom is comfortable to help and can go home if someone else shows up

Probably New Jersey, maybe Hudson Valley

Has at least 1, preferably 2, separate bedrooms

Has 2 beds

Has ADA accessible entry

Has a kitchen

Has a full bath, preferably and a half

Has internet and preferably a TV

Lodging for Mom + Dad/care team while I’m in OR

Probably 5-7 days

Preferably with a 1-2 day buffer period before OR date (included in the 7 day estimate) so I can enjoy the city

Either within a short walk from Mt. Sinai or on the same subway line as Mt. Sinai

RW, 1, or ACE

Someone to help me get from recovery location to Mt. Sinai while not in NYC

Develop and get list of items needed for recovery

Dilator

Pads

Gowns/loose clothing

Comfort food

Coordinate missing 8-9 weeks of work

Take care with who knows what before I leave

Inform HR, department manager, and work friends whats up

Get cleared for surgery and get an OR date

Probably a 6-12 month date from clearance

Get pre clearance testing through PCP or a lab in hometown

Go to NYC for that if need be

Week Before Surgery

No alcohol, no aspirin, NSAIDs, herbal supplements, or fish oil

Consult for other non aspirin blood thinners (which I am not on)

No alcohol for 3 weeks after as well

Tylenol/Acetaminophen is okay

Go downstate

See friends from NYC?

Bring Mom/Dad?

Do something fun in Manhattan

Get a COVID test

Take an anti-bacterial bath

Day before surgery

Breakfast before 9am

Last meal

Drink Golytely bowel solution around noon

Chemically induced diarrhea

Clear fluids only after golytely

(includes coffee, tea, water, broth, some juices)

Nothing goes in the stomach after midnight

Some medication okay with a sip of water

HRT???

Get surgery (a penile inversion vaginoplasty)

1 to 1+½ days

I’ve heard of as long as three

3-5 day hospital stay

Mom and Dad probably stay in Manhattan then

Go to recovery location

Drive with seat reclined

Stay for 4 weeks, pretty much bedridden

Go to follow ups

Dilate

Go home

Continue recovery for another 2-4 weeks at home

Follow up with PCP

Return to life

[gojofavho3]

Hi there i have a little Gojo req in mind; Gojo x male reader but reader is like,, taller than him, bigger yk? maybe a bit buffer, arms big enough to throw Gojo over his shoulder hehe. Maybe Gojo is infatuated by the idea of climbing on top of Reader and absolutely WRECKING himself on him 😍 alright okay that got out of hand i hope thats okay but ofc if not i understand and you can just ignore this req, but if you DO do the fic then i am FOREVER IN YOUR DEBT 🙏🏼

Heyyyyy, thanks for the request!!! Sorry to keep you waiting, I had a math test, so I had to put all my focus on that, and that shit was so easy mann

A/n: It probably won't be long, trying to discover other types of writing tbh, because my writing in English is not as good as my Portuguese yk? And dyslexic also doesn't help a lot

There aren't many people who are taller than gojo, At least that he knows personally

gojo is 1.90 centimeters tall, any taller than that you will have to bend down at doors

When you two started dating, he was the happiest man alive, there's is not much people close to him that live so long so, he tries his hardest to protect you and make u become more and more happy every day of your relationship

He just loves you too much

He lets you do anything with him, first time you put him in your shoulders he was surprised. he didn't know what to say or what to do, he was blushing so bad that even a rose couldn't be that red, he was caught off guard not using infinity. Eventually, he got used to and sometimes he doesn't use infinity so you can grab him and put him in your shoulders

He also loves the warmth of your body, especially when it comes to cuddling, he won't leave you alone, not even for one second. You being bigger then him and probably with a bigger chest, he will put his cheek on your chest and rub his cheek against your chest, very close to your nipples, all his problems in the world almost fade away in that state

And thats one of the reasons you have the so called the "strongest" on your dick rn!

" Satoru gojo desperate for a dick so bad. who would imagine?

The so "strongest!"... strongest hoe that's for sure "

The white hair has his cheeks red, red and red, he was on top of you, some of his sweat going to your stomach and pre cum too

In this angle the white moon made him look glorious, the shadow makes his blue eyes glowing like the stars.

It was a dark night, and a cold one too! With autumn the winds start to get stronger and stronger

And what's more warm to made two body's sweat than sex?

"c-can't you he-help me a little ah-awh!"

" nopee! You tied my hands, your the one who wanted so bad to do it alone "

Your hand points to your hands, tied up to the bed by Satoru with one of his blindfolds

He pouts, but continues to go up and down on your fat cook

Every time he goes down he lets out a moan and whimpers, closing his eyes shut tight with his head looking up

Up Up Up Up Up

Down Down Down down down

He goes down and sucks your nipples until it becomes red and purple, he loves hearing you whimpering and creaming, he could feel you getting more close in the seconds

Sometimes he letted it leave his hole put he slip it back again, with the most care in the world

He stopped sucking it and goes to your face, giving you a honest smile, with his eyes close, and then giving you silly kisses that he knew you loved

Satoru could feel your cheeks being heated as he played with them, like a granny, making you made silly faces too.

"why are you making my face look silly in the middle of fucking?"

"b-because..."

"because..?"

"because I cann! W-Why~~? Wanted me to slap them?? Agwh!.."

"no sir!"

You says Ironically as he stops after a while and continues to bounce on your dick

His ass cheeks slapping with your lower part, making the clap sound over and over

You could feel he was cumming, you could feel how tight his hole was becoming and the sounds he was madding becoming more loud

" c-ca-can I I cum.. mhm! "

" n-no need to ask, jus come, I'm also close..."

You say already feeling your cum starting to leave your cook

Up Up Up Up Up Up upupuupupupup-

Downdowndowndowndowndowndown-

Splash!

White

Everywhere

You two were heavily breathing, with white splashed on your stomach and the covers

He falls in your chest, cum dripping down on his hole going to your cook and traveling to the covers

His hair is all messed up like yours

He kisses you, a kiss really heated out, until you two become with almost no air, painted out

" d-did... did you g-get warm...? "

Satoru nods as he can't talk yet

" good.. "

You say finally taking your hands of his blindfold, going immediately to his ass, slapping with all your strength, making his ass red as fuckkk, letting it jiggle, yes, he has some cake there

He whines and lets out a loud moan that even your neighbours could hear

He had a confused and hot look on his face as he puts his hand in his hair wires, messing it more

"w-why..??"

" to get you ready for round 2

It's good that you warm but! This shit ain't over love!! "

Hope u like it! And now your in debt with me 😈

Kidding

This was funny to write

I don't understand people who say the moon is yellow, like the only colour I see is white there

And for knowledge, I'm not colour blind, I think

And now, I'll farm for sampo, my big titties man 😋💖

See you, till next time!

@heart-lovees

[toffeebrews]

Hello!! How tall is Vigil? is she as tall as canon Toriel or is she another height? also what is the thing on her cheek? is that a scar (how did she get it then?) or some other mark? and how does she handle murderous Floweys? does she have hard times killing those? does she try to convince them otherwise? does she ignore them? how about human children, like Charas and Frisks?

I'm so sorry if these are a lot of questions but you have no idea how much i waited for someone to make a Toriel outcode!!! she deserves so much attention...

I appreciate the enthusiasm! Part of the reason I made her in the first place is Toriel and other characters from undertale are kinda unexplored in the utmv :D! I was kinda scared at first at it being ooc but then I realized most of the sanses of the multiverse are ooc anyway so... (no hate btw)

She's probably slightly taller than normal toriel, something like 6"5"? assuming Toriel is 6"3".

Yes, that's a scar! They're supposed to reflect the injuries she gets in a genocide route because she comes from one :) The one on her hip area is there as well, just not seen.

Floweys? Partially yeah. Especially once she learned Flowey and asriel are one in the same. But she has enough of a buffer that it may not bother her in the same way as say killing someone whos an Asirel.

Depending on the circumstances she may just attempt to council. Say, if they've only

Frisk, Chara or any other children she would struggle to kill. Given her belief of inherent murderers. She would believe these children are doomed to a dark path. I think Vigil would attempt to ignore or simply find a way to confine or cage them in some way. Is there like .. multiverseal jail? Yeah something like that. So they can't hurt others and she doesn't have to kill them. The only way i could see her actually killing them is on accident which is entirely possible .

She would kill a child only as a last resort and they're actively in the moment trying to kill someone. Maybe thats a difference between her and normal toriel idk shrug. She would bury herself in "that wasn't a child anymore" or "it was for the protection of the multiverse." She would pretend it didn't happen.

[koipalm]

I know the attendant!sy is a liushen fic but... I'm sorry, but my brain literally can't stop turning SQQ's and SY's relationship over a fire like a very juicy roast. Not even in a slash way just... Like, a god tried to stuff Some Guy in his body, failed, made him a new one and SQQ's brilliant idea was to adopt him as an overworked TA/stray cat. The guy is from a different world entirely, knows just about everything about this world and hates his guts. He has a very good reason to hate his guts. That's fine tho, SQQ believes this is a perfectly normal reaction to him because he literally can't concieve someone NOT hating him. SY being grudgingly grateful is the highest level of regard SQQ is capable of tolerating/understanding. He hates his guts back and yet still takes care of him. He overworks him to the point everybody thinks SY is gonna drop dead any minute and thinks this is perfectly normal, that was how SQQ lived 90% of his life. This man should not be within hearing distance of a child and pounced on the opportunity to put a socially acceptable buffer between himself and his disciples. Tearing his limbs off wouldn't be enough to admit he cares one iota about SY and yet he's probably planning ten different ways to discreetly poison LQG if he so much as looks at SY. This is probably the best relationship (non-romantic or otherwise) SQQ has in his life rn and if that doesn't terrify everyone who hears about it then I don't know what does.

Just. Slowly turning all this over a firepit in my brain.

ive tried to write like 5 different replies to this and theyre all incoherent AUGHHH anyway lets just get into it

one of the most interesting things that i wanted to explore in this au was if sqq and sy had to exist in somewhat close proximity to each other. the truth of the situation is that sqq is actually a lot more lax about watching sy than shen yuan makes it out to be. in reality a lot of sqq's outward expression towards shen yuan is very blank or dismissive. sqq will only really step in if he thinks that someone is trying to take shen yuan away from him. but if shen yuan was in actual physical danger like a demonic beast or a roof caving in, sqq would not move to help him. AHHHH its hard to explain super clearly.

shen qingqiu sees shen yuan as something that is "his" in a more metaphysical sense. although the system could have torn his life apart and shen yuan could have ruined his image and stolen his place, that didnt happen, and instead, shen qingqiu was given essentially an ace-in-the-hole. shen yuan, to him, was almost divinely given, even if it was by divine fuck-up.

shen qingqiu would see shen yuan being in danger as basically natural selection though. he wouldnt keep someone around that couldnt handle themselves, so shen yuan has to get out of conflicts himself. if someones tries to take shen yuan from him though, thats pretty much interfering with the will of the gods, and trying to take someone from qing jing peak (his assistant specifically), so in that instance, shen qingqiu would step in

its interesting tho, shen qingqiu really does just see shen yuan as an assistant. a divinely ordained assistant, but still

[diaphin93]

- One key aspect of Edelgard reforms is not just doing change directly but also paving the way for other societal change to be made through suppressing institutions protecting the status quo and giving people the tools they need ( education, government position open to all, etc )... So outside of the reforms directly metionned in CF, what other societal change do you think she or her government will bring during her lifetime?

- If you had to make the "ideal" post CF government who in the cast would you pick? It can be based on ending ( like Manuela becoming prime minister ) or entirely be based on your interpretation

- If Edelgard/Hubert/Ferdinand were commoners, how do you think their life would be like?

- Do you have any analysis on Edelgard that is uncommon? What's your favorite line from her?

Oh, that are some interesting questions. Let me go into all of them one by one.

I assume many of the changes Edelgard implements will be gradual, as she and her government basically need to figure out modernity all by themselves, really only knowing the structures of the strict feudal caste system they grew up in. Like, many people cite Ferdinand having to come up with the concept of universal education for her, but the matter of fact is, this is an entire new and novel concept and one person can't figure out all by themself, though we know that noble inheritance is already abolished in the following generation. I would say structural reforms in Leicester and Faerghus would be big ones, putting them closer to the more bureaucratic centralized system that Adrestia seems to have, looking at the presence of ministries. Considering her already being on board with public education and wanting to reduce the political influence of the church, I could see her introducing state wellfare policies that take over the role that religious charity would have. One important one probably also would be to either reform the ministry of religious affairs into a proper ministry of justice, which it already acted as, or alternatively relocate most of its ressources to a new ministry of justice, as well as law reforms in the vein of Napoleons code civil, to ensure secular laws. As she is not an enemy of the faith itself but also seems rather desinterested in it, while expressing interest in improving foreign relations, I fully expect for her to either implement freedom of religion or, as a predecessor, a general policy of religious tolerance. There probably would be uniform laws for the three nations, while I also expect her to allow Duscur to either declare its independence or remain in the empire as an autonomous region, as we saw her doing with Brigid and with Kupala respectively. I could see similar policies to the former sreng regions in northern faerghus, to allow its original inhabitants to return and either become an autonomous region of the empire or reuinite with Sreng. Due to the roman inspiration of Adrestia, I think it would be interesting for her to introduce a senate, especially since it would be a buffer between the imperial ministries and the throne, but thats more headcanon. We have no ideas on how Edelgard feels about democratic reforms, so every pro and contra argument would be highly speculative. I think generally most of Edelgards reforms would be focussed on secularization and the abolition of noble inheritance structures, before she steps down and lets a worthy successor continue her reformist policies. We also don't know enough on the details of adrestian law and economy, to be sure of all kinds of reforms she could make, this would be a matter of headcanons and fanwork.

This might be a tadbit boring, but I don't really have much in terms of ideal visions for a potential government for Edelgard. I see the case for Ferdinand being the Prime Minister, due to his own character development and role in supporting Edelgards reforms in CF, but I personally also prefer Manuela as Prime Minister as it fits much better with the spirit of Edelgards reforms and policies, having an educated commoner in the highest ministerial office. In the end, Black Eagles House has the common shortcomings of all 3 Houses routes, that the majority of students are children of the high nobility, and alot of the positions we learn about are more filled to conclude their personal character arcs, like Ferdinand being prime minister or Caspar becoming Minister of Military Affairs. I guess for me, I would like Manuela to act as prime minister, while Ferdinand should be allowed to fully focus on his educational reforms through creating a new ministry of education. If they can be found and contracted, I think a sensible thing in the name of reconciliation would be for her to try and reach out to Seteth, with the offer of him becoming the minister of religious affair or either him or Flayn to be allowed, if they want, to start a new reformed Church of Seiros, so that they at the very least have the option to return home to Garreg Mach and live there peacefully, under the condition that they learn to work hand in hand with humans as their equals. Otherwise, I would guess that in case she survives either Mercedes or the eastern Bishop would make a fine minister of religious affairs. Duke Gerth already seems to be a sensible minister of foreign affairs, in case he is recruited or otherwise assumed to survive, Sylvain would make his most sensible successor. Generally, as it modernizes, Adrestia would need to establish more ministries overall. The ministry of the imperial household probably should be openly reformed into domestic intelligence for more transparency, as Hubert already fulfills this position. I think, again in case he survives, Lorenz would make a good minister of domestic affairs. But again, I don't have strong feelings on that one, as there really is a lack of more interesting choices. A priority would be for the ministries to offer mentorship to commoners who want to engage with the government.

Thats a tough one, as commoners still have class differences and there are nuances to that one too and their lifes would take entirely different directions with them forming different personalities if they were born under other circumstances. I mean, most of them. Hubert totally would become some underworld crime boss who reveals and takes care of corrupt nobility, lol. Basically some Yakuza with a sense of honor archetype, lol. But going for what would preserve their personalities and story beats, I see Ferdinand as somewhat a member of the upper class, possibly with his father being an ambitious merchant who tries to scheme his son into a better station in life, though I think he would go more into the direction of being a lawyer, he just seems to be this very enlightenment thinker law school graduate archetype if he wasn't a noble, befitting his high sense of justice and posh attitude. He totally would be in Garreg Mach due to a full scholarship and super proud of it, citing the careers of former winners of said scholarship. Edelgard is more tricky, though I would say, in her case she probably would be just some commoner who happened to have the Crest of Seiros, probably some illegitimate child who was never found, or the daughter of one whose crest skipped a few generations. I see her more of a humble upbringing in the scenario of her being a commoner, a peasant or the daughter of servants. I guess the later, as this would offer an excuse to why she was in the Kingdom and knew Dimitri, maybe her being a maid servant of the Arundel family. And naturally she would have been caught in the crest experiments of TWSITD still, if the goal is to preserve her overall story beats, and as the sole survivor become the adopted daughter of Lord Arundel, her still being determined to end the crest and nobility system, possible even more in this scenario, and using Thales connections to stage a coup against the Hresvelg Family. I see her still as the house leader of the Black Eagles, though her being of a commoner background her, she probably could be somewhat more strict and serious in her demeanor to integrate. Like, this entire scenario would be a compelling AU and I think I could make an entire blogpost based on it. Assuming all three are commoners, Hubert and Edelgards relationship would be very different. I think he would be still loyal to her, but he would be basically some enforcer she picked up as her retainer, so their interactions would be much more informal, acting more as partners in crime. Edelgard and Ferdinand would probably be even more rivalrous, Ferdinand possibly being jealous of her now and I see her and Dorothea being even more close. Those two are already very close, having it it off immediately obviously, considering how Dorothea is the only one in the BE cast she already seems to be close to at the start, so this relationship would just be stronger, them being two commoner girls among all these nobles, it would be an outlet for Edelgard to be her former commoner self more. I think she would be more distanced to her former classmates at the start, having to learn that nobles have their own issues and to empathize with them as well.

I don't think I have really much to add, especially since Captain Flash and others already analyzed many facets of her personality. As I mentioned, I interpret Dorothea and Edelgard as immediately having hit it off the moment they first met, like you know when you are in a new school and workplace and meet this one person who is your bestie at the end of the day? They seem already close friends from the beginning. I personally see her also valueing Hubert and Ferdinand in particular as two brother figures, Hubert being an older brother who takes care of her and she wishing they could be more informal with each other, while I think a part of her enjoys Ferdinands annoying attitude that allows her to be more childish as times, something she rarely can afford due to what happened to her. I think there is some importance in the relationship between Edelgard and Dimitri many overlook. Primarily, because Discourse embittered the fanbases of both characters to each other and if interpretations take place, it is mostly from a Dimitri centric place that interprets Edelgard less favorably. Even if she doesn't really remembers him, I think she values parts of his personality alot, his very straight forward and well intentioned attitude, though his somewhat naive and undetermined outlook on everything probably frustrates her as well. She obviously hates his vengeful personality, feeling appeled by his obsession to her, as she states herself, but its clear that she feels a great deal of empathy towards him. It is implied that she cries after he dies and the scene makes it clear, that no matter if she did or not, she at least felt like crying in this moment. Edelgard is strongly linked with symbolizing the future, while Dimitri thematically represents the past, his arc being all about how the ghosts of the past haunt him. I think from an Edelgard centric standpoint, Dimitri represents her past, that has been twisted and corrupted by Thales, becoming a source of pain and anguish to her.

But so far, thats all. I hope I could answer your questions in a satisfying way and feel free to send me more asks, this one was fun.

[eggsploded]

HOMESTUCK AND STAR TREK? :O

oh baby this posts gonna be long

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

HS: aradia and sollux. aradia is my favorite forever as my patron troll and sollux is just fun to draw because whys he look like that

ST: all the cardassians in general. garak is the best, im honestly more fascinated with andrew robinson himself and his dedication to the character. also damar who doesnt get much presence until later seasons and gets crushed by actually giving a fuck about his position. i took a shot of kanar (maple syrup) for his honor and it was agony.

dukat is excluded from this because he managed to curse the show into buffering on his face everytime i watched.

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

HS: probably the beta kids before playing sburb. theyre all just little kids and best friends forever and it makes me tear up- in pesterquest dave literally talks about jade like shes his girlfriend that goes to a different school. all the kids were more than eager to see eachother in person and it sucks that it happened under the circumstances of.. homestuck

i dont have cuteness aggression for them theyve been through enough :-(

ST: in TNG's the enemy geordi helps out this genuinely pitiful romulan dude thats shaking like a chihuahua and i felt so much for that guy i wish he came back

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

HS: i think people are finally past portraying kanaya as a nothingburger, it was kind of funny 10 years ago that people were falling into her flimsy veil of Perceived Normalcy, like she doesnt regularly bite her friends and wasnt unforgivably delulu about vriska when they were moirails.

truly underrated might be the felt? their designs tickle me

ST: damar? maybe hes got more content now idk. honorable mentions are: keiko obrien, worfs parents (my favorite tng ep), hugh, the cardassian scientists that hit on obrien that one time, lwaxana troi and keevan.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

HS: any of signless' crew. like. we got shafted so hard with the dancestors its crazy. in my wildest dreams psiioniic didnt get utterly crushed by the vast glub and somehow escaped at the ripe age of 2000 sweeps and is now overgrown and too old and ancient for his own good, squatting in solluxs hive. we didnt get much content about how signless did his recruiting- did he just do speeches and demonstrations? did he fuck nasty? i know for sure it wasnt the cringe dialogue they strapped kankri with. same goes for dolorosas life before she raised signless, she should be at the club.

ST: background vulcans. especially in TNG when they just stopped giving a fuck about them, thank god tuvok exists or i wouldve had no incentive at all to actually watch part of VOY.

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

HS: equius. its really a special day when a character cant be quantified with a simple archetype like the rest of the trolls. theres something so deeply strange and wrong with him that its captivating, i chalk it up to being the horse guy in a insect body.

hussie also just like, had it out for him at day one. gamzee got beaten to a pulp narratively but equius didnt even get a chance. its sad, and im more interested in what he couldve been rather than someone like eridan or meenah.

ST: kai winn. shes literally an alien white woman and its fantastic. she did her role so good that the poor actress got hatemail, and her insidiousness is just so well done. the final season of ds9 isnt that good but it was fun to see her go off the rails with dukat.

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

HS: what do i look like? hussie? in truth when it comes to being a flop i like seeing kanaya flounder. shes weird guys. she is so fucking weird and she doesnt really know because her friends are Weirder. we dont always need her to slay, atleast in my book.

ST: riker. no further notes

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

HS: jake. if he has a deeper character i havent noticed because my eyes glaze over trying to read through this dialogue. he feels like a leftover shitpost character hussie couldnt fit on the dancestors. i havent reread act 6 yet, but i remember such a large chunk being some strange love triangle-square surrounding jake and i did Not Give a Fuck, and salt in the wound was dirk and janes friendship being so fantastic but overshadowed by jakes unceasing sex appeal cursing them.

ST: obrien because it was be a standard episode plot for him, i think hed come out fine

[littlefroginthegarden]

Sold to Heartsteel 1/24

its a liiiittle bit late but whatever... im trying to write an advents calendar fic, theres some buffer but ill write during the month so im also open to input if you have any good ideas :)

hope you enjoy!

Tags: semi-ironic adaptation of 'sold to one direction' trope so yeah theres obv selling involved, angst, fluff, friendship, romance, maybe smut, mlm, transmasc character, some transphobia but mostly just parents being shit but nothing explicit or slurs or stuff, yeah i think thats about it, ill update this if anything changes xoxo

Part 1

Hi, my name is Hwei and I’m a misunderstood artist. Well, that’s not exactly true. My Parents hate my art and they think it’s just a waste of time. But under the name DemonBrush I’m known all around the world, my art account just recently hit two million followers. Which didn’t help me at all in my real life. I’ve been 18 now for a few months but my parents still act like I’m 16. I haven’t finished school yet and I can’t move out because my anxiety has made working impossible so far. My parents don’t allow me to get therapy or meds and I’m on their insurance so there’s nothing I can do. I sigh and try to think about something else but looking out my small window into the dark December morning isn’t helping. I go and pull the curtains, turn on my fairy lights and sit at my small desk that is crammed between the bed and the heavy wooden dresser. 

My reflection stares at me in the mirror, dark shadows under my amethyst eyes, a sign that I slept terribly, once again. The nightmares wouldn’t leave me alone. I sigh and start doing my makeup, nothing bright, just some smudged dark eyeshadow and black eyeliner on my waterline. My mom was probably gonna complain again but I don’t care. Last week she told me “People might think you’re gay!” Yeah, sure mom. I mean, why do you think I have all these Heartsteel posters hanging in my room? Because I love their one song so much? But when she says "gay" she means "lesbian". She would have an aneurysm if I tried to explain to her that I’m trans. And then she would probably throw me out. As if she could read my thoughts, I hear her shouting from downstairs “Come down immediately, Hwa! I can hear that you’re up.”

Ugh.

I throw on a black oversized hoodie that matches my skinny jeans (also black) and put my dark juniper green hair in a messy bun before I run downstairs as quick as I can. Better not make mom wait, she’s awful enough as is.

When I enter the kitchen, I almost bump into a large man in a suit that is standing next to my mom.

“Oh fuck, sorry!” I quickly say, getting a death stare from my mom but for once she doesn’t even berate me for swearing. She just looks between me and this dude, who was wearing dark sunglasses (in December!) for some fucking reason.

“Who is this?” I ask after a few moments of awkward silence.

“My name is Mr. Mundo, nice to meet you, Hwa.” His voice fits his impressive stature perfectly.

My mother steps forward and puts her hand on my shoulder, looking at me more seriously than I have ever seen her. “You know that we haven’t had the easiest time since dad lost his job. And since you refuse to work and pay your share, we had no other choice.”

“What do you mean? What choice?” I ask, slowly starting to panic.

“You’ll go with Mr. Mundo, he has a job for you where you’ll work for six months. You’ll get a room and food and the money goes to pay back all the debt you owe us.”

“Debt? What do I owe you?”

“Darling, you've been living and eating here for free for 18 years!”

“This is insane!” I yell at her. “You’re selling me? You are a monster!”

“Selling? It’s just temporary honey, and it’s a decent job, don’t make it sound worse than it is!”

“You can’t do that, I’m an adult, you can’t force me!” At this point I’m full on panicking. This can’t be happening, it should just be another nightmare. But I know it’s real. My nightmares are way different.

“You are right and nobody is forcing you. But think about this, it would give you the perfect opportunity to get some good job experiences while at the same time helping out your family! Also –” she adds “if you don’t take this offer then you’ll have to pack your bags, we can’t pay for you any longer.”

“If you stayed off the booze you could.” I press through my teeth, anger winning over panic.

She just ignores it and tells me “Please Honey, think about it. If you go with Mr. Mundo at least you’ll have a roof and food. We just want what’s best for you! You’ll thank us in a few years, mark my words.” With this she turns around and leaves me alone in the kitchen with this absolute hunk of a man.

“Go pack your stuff, we leave in an hour.” He hands me a big suitcase before sinking down onto the washed-out red leather couch in the living room, turning the TV on, unfazed by all of this as if it was his daily job. Which it probably was.

Still in shock, I go back to my room and just stare at the mirror for a solid minute. I still haven’t processed what just happened but I start throwing my most important stuff into the suitcase. I have a lot of clothes but most of them are from my parents and I hate wearing them. So it’s not too difficult to fit all my favorite pieces into the suitcase, some skinny jeans, flowy tops and hoodies and of course accessories, I can’t leave my choker collection here. Then I go to my bed and from under the mattress I pull my binder. I put it under all the other things so it won’t be visible if my mom checks my suitcase. She would freak out. I gather the rest of the stuff, making sure I have my laptop, makeup and favorite books, and check the time. I still have 15 minutes left but at this point, the quicker I’m gone the better. I grab the heavy suitcase and try to carry it down the stairs. Two steps in I nearly slip and the suitcase crashes onto the step with a loud Thud. Before I’m even up I can hear heavy steps on the stairs.

Mr. Mundo grabs the suitcase without saying a word and carries it down. I awkwardly follow him, hoping my mom is distracted and hasn’t noticed the commotion. For once I seem to be lucky, she’s nowhere to be seen. At the door, Mr. Mundo turns around and asks me “Are you sure that you have everything? You won’t be able to come back here anytime soon.”

“Yeah I’m not planning on doing that anyways. Can we go?” I ask impatiently.

He doesn’t answer and just opens the door and walks down the driveway towards the black car with darkened windows that is waiting at the end of it. He puts my suitcase in the back of it with ease and opens the door in the back, gesturing for me to get in. I hesitate for a second, but when I can hear the front door of the house open again, I quickly get in before I can hear whatever my mother wants to tell me. He slams the door behind me and gets into the driver’s seat, which I can’t even see from back here because there’s a divider between the front and the back of the car. Like in a limousine. Or a cop car. It feels more like the latter, like I’m a prisoner.

The car rumbles to life and even though the windows are heavily tinted, I can see the shadows of trees racing past us. Where are we going?

[girlypopastro]

taurus rising is social houses in water signs.

they have a generous heart for their community. generally as no boundaries as a taurus gets. they love to hear everybody out. the weirdo, the antihero, the mean girl. they do not mind having people of all different paths in various social circles. but you might notice they are slippery. the slip in and out of all these circles easily adapting to each, collecting stories, collecting wisdom from all these people. effervescent ephemeral. that does not mean that anything goes in their little communities. they are open to all life paths as long as you don’t have your values all wrong. as long as they feel like you have a good heart they will let a lot slide. at the end of the day .. whats not their monkey, thats not their circus. they know what they think its the truth.

but make no mistake. just because they would invite you for dinner, introduce you to their acquaintance they feel like you would get along with great, invite you to their get together of all these lovable weirdos or wouldn’t let you sleep outside in the freezing cold … doesn’t mean they feel like you get to know them like that. you might even notice the closer you get to them the more enclosed they become. if they feel like you are a friend of a friend .. off they go blabbering on about their dreams and ideas, feelings and impressions. but if you’re going to be in their day to day .. oh boy, they put their big kid shell on and you might noticed them waiting to see if they can invest in you. they will gladly take care of you or help you. they will love it if you open up emotionally to them. just with them opening up to you might take some time and be indirect. because once you’re in you’re in and taken care of. they might actually be mad if you take their caregiver spotlight. in that vain they might be the one turning into a huge baby

you may have noticed this resistance to one on one hang outs. and maybe they are the one person who is really picky with people they date (really nitpicky and critical if you will). they might be scrambling to look for buffer people to have on these one on one hangouts. they might indeed fear that you won’t be talking enough and they might reveal more about themselves than they are comfortable with. it’s not this desire to be mysterious, it’s out of fear of getting vulnerable and you leaving them. they know that people are unstable points in their lives and they are trying to protect themselves from getting attached. because once you are theirs you are THEIRS and you no longer have a say in that matter . if a taurus rising likes spending time with you one on one, just know that you are special. with most people they probably feel a little on edge, a little paranoid, they are censoring themselves. or silently listening collecting all the information on that other person. if their avoidant ass doesnt run for the hills when they feel attached to you, they will make it a point to understand you, you will occupy their mind to the point of not having to say anything for them to know. possibly years of restricted vulnerability will be unleashed on you in a way that is deeply transformative to them, and you know they hate change more than anything. they will grow to someone who is fit for merging your two souls into one. just so you know they are terrified of abandonment and they might get very possessive and obsessive if they feel you slipping from them and tighten their grip on you even if they have to metaphorically strangle you. and if you do indeed make them feel abandoned, you will have created a stubborn enemy for life. for they do hold grudges like it is their life purpose.

and for you my taurus rising, people much like plants need space, water and air to grow, to live. i know you are afraid, my baby. you need to loosen your grip a little. i know you need to go at your own pace and other people do too, so do not rush them and if they are rushing you, let them go. let go. let go of grudges. let go of resentment. let go of entitlement. and stop giving people the damn silent treatment. love will never be perfect the way you want it. people won’t behave in the exact ways you want them to. especially if you shut down and go into your intricate schemes and paranoid ideations to make them. the only think you can control is yourself. so let go.. wont it be way more comfortable this way??

[skitskatdacat63]

Not be screaming Insanely to you about strollonso again but I have thots. Thinkings. And yeah.

So like I love how everyone expected them to not get well w each other yk like people THOUGHT they would be on each others throats, and nando would commit warcrimes against lance etc etc(Especially after last years Austin incident yeahh....)WHILE they were actually ALREADY on good terms in 2021(the recent gifs that showed lance being like a teenager w crush ykyky)(plus I do remember photos of them interacting just casually) and before that yk when nando congratulated lance on his first podium in baku(which I'll never get out of my head gladly)

And like NOW they are also so well w each other ESPECIALLY now that they are teammates. And its NICE and they are COMFY plus WHAT HAPPENED IM BAHRAIN OFC. And now wih nando casually making lance photos..they are so comfortable. Like aughh.

Thats all I guess please add anything you have in mind aswell 😭😭

Well I think it's funny because, as you mentioned, one of the only pre-2023 moments of strollonso I remember distinctly is when they had the collision during the US gp 😭 and I feel like everyone saw that and were like "oh god Nando is gonna kill him when they're teammates", and then a similar situation kinda happened again at the very first gp when Lance hit the back of Nando but when Nando found out, he's just like "okay :)"

I wonder though sometimes what they'd be like if the AMR23 was like the prev one. Because I do think Nando does actually like Lance, but also I don't think you can deny that Nando's podiums are indeed a buffer. Kinda like him being like "anything you can do to me is literally nothing because I have a great car and I'm doing better than I have in years", like bro is on top of the world after so long, and it feels like he's gotten a second wind where nothing can really touch him or bother him.

I hate how everyone uses that "Lance is the owner's son, so of course Fernando will treat him nicely" argument. Like yeah that's a factor, but I feel like I see it more as Nando appreciating Lance bcs he factors into why Nando has a good car and a good team in the first place. I think tho my fav strollonso plot line is Nando being like "ugh ill put up w him I guess", but then he ends up having such a good car and finds out in the process that Lance is more than he ever considered(like in this fic ) And also the narrative of Nando being a very different, supportive teammate as compared to most other Lance has had. I like that they probably came into being teammates with certain assumptions, but now look at how comfy they are with each other!! Enough to tease each other is such public ways, like Lance saying certain things in interviews and Nando with his socmed. It's very fun!

BUT YEAH OH MY GOD THAT CLIP OF THEM WITH LANCE BEING SO TOUCHY AND SHOVEY WITH HIM!!!! people need to look back at older clips like that and the others you mentioned before they make assumptions about why they are the way they are >:(

[dhdhhehdndbdbd]

continued journal from 5/23/24

started my internship. was expecting another mediocre, mind-draining miami gig but the people are actually quite diverse. a lot of students from UF, some georgia tech, some upenn, emory, even MIT. honestly, i dont know how i ended up in a room with those kind of people. oh wait... maybe bc i may match up to them. i couldve been in their spots as easily as they couldve been in mine. (maybe, thats what i like to hope). no, but seriously, it kind of does something to the self esteem to be surrounded by people who seem to be somewhat driven and smart in their lives. they go to good schools, they got an internship, they have projects and coding experince, things they'll actually do. do i belong in this room? thats the type of question that goes in my head. at the harvard conference, no, i didnt feel like i belonged in that room at all. all those smart asian girls with so much drive and ambition and much more self involved than i am. i am both simple and complex. i dont quite fit into that - but i think i do have a talent; i do have something. i dont know how far it can take me. i guess its as far as i wanna push myself.

i feel my drive to make the film wane, and it makes me sad, because i wanted to do that. i think just the last 3 days have been so draining i havent had mind to do anything else. i tidied up the kitchen at least, im gonna clean my room a bit, and maybe just chill. im at home tomorrow for work and it should be easy stuff so itll be fine.

a strange place im in. i wonder what to do. am i doing right? am i doing wrong? (no, i dont think so). emotions are meh. still not fully happy and clear. still some lingers of the past.

ill be leaving soon enough... but this year has been kinder, so far. maybe because, partially, i made those decisions for myself. yes, i got lucky that i got the dorms; but im the one who applied and sat through an hour of buffering screens when applications opened. yes, i went to italy, it was lovely - but im the one who worked and saved, found the program, applied asap, did everything i could, paid for myself. yes, i had a boyfriend, but i searched an app for a guy who was maybe a little bit of a loser and would probably treat me right - i got flowers and gifts and love for the first time in a while. though i didnt reciprocate it, knowing that was still possible was nice. my brain has already shifted to looking for others but i know its too soon, its only been a month since we broke up. i still think about him but i just realized, probably only once or twice a day. for a boyfriend i just broke up? jesus, thats not a lot. yes i grieved but the lack of it shows me that maybe i was right to end it. am i right for wanting it to start again in the fall? maybe you should just leave that boy alone...

[spot-of-tea]

I've been writing

so I've got some fics that I've been writing recently and while it's slow going I've managed to hit one and a half chapters for the one I'm mainly writing right now, my hope is that I'll be able to put it up on AO3 when I've got a big enough buffer since I do have the whole fic planned out, so the outline is completely finished. It's just writing the bugger now.

I'm probably gonna post some world building from the fic here as the general idea is that it's a next gen style fic. I suppose the best part about this is that it leaves a lot of room for future fics in the same au focusing on different characters and events which take place outside of the original fic.

The other fic I'm working on is turning out to be an absolute beast and while I have a few chapters done I'm waiting to finish the outline (which I'm actually really enjoying writing atm) before really getting into the meat of it, so thats gonna take much longer.

I am taking this creative process super slow and only doing it when I feel like it so that I can enjoy the process as I enjoy writing and don't want to get burned out on it by turning it into a chore.

[jupiter-reimagined]

okay. okay okay okay. literally noone cares or asked but i feel like i should still document this so *i* dont forget about this in 5 years. so. uh. vex. vexy boy. him. uhm. so first off i hate his name now, it was supposed to be a placeholder until i came up with something better and like. dont worry about what inspired it. okay anyways.

so. uhhh the universe is very sci-fi driven. like interplanetary exploration and alien species sorta things. i really dont like timeframes or setting concrete years, but this could be like. retro futurism inspired shit. but probably taking place a few hundred years in the future at *least*, but like 10k years *max* cuz i am NOT dealing with figuring out the possible evolution of the human species. or any other species. this timeframe is purely there for fun possible tech.

i also made up a plant for this. its a non-toxic berry bush called pebbleberry. despite tasting like mud, theyre surprisingly nutritious, and can grow up to the size of a plum. and they get their name from the fruit itself having a dull gray colour, like a pebble. the muddy taste also adds to the naming factor.

okay so. the main crew. theres vex (new name pending), sarah and paul. they also have additional techies on-board, but these 3 are the ones leading the research expedition to a recently discovered planet, which seems viable to sustain life, which i imagine is roughly the size of the moon. also like. pardon scientific inaccuracies I Dont Care i just wanna play with the little people living in my head and not look too deeply into. anything. yeah.

so vex is the leading scientist, hes the one in charge of all the people. hes also the oldest member of the team, at around 60. grumpy old bastard. he doesnt have a set appearance. none of them do. but if i had to think about him, i feel like he'd be on the shorter side and have a beer-belly. i dont think he has a partner or children of his own because he takes his job seriously, as it was basically his lifes mission to do this and is *very* excited about it all, and hes VERY qualified for the job and extremely passionate about it all. i see him having written and published at least 3 research papers or books about various subjects, and the research mission to the new planet will be the focus on his 4th study. and hes fully human. well. as purebred as they can get in that time.

sarah, i believe, was supposed to be like the zoologist. she was originally like 23. but thats boring. so shes in her 50s now. tall but on the buffer side. has to be since she works part-time as a nurse. librarian glasses all the way. signed up for the mission in hopes of discovering a new species that her homeplanet previously was unaware of. boy will she be in for the ride of her life. her goals are to spread information about hybrids and different species to the masses, due to coming from a long lineage of hybrids herself. species undecided as of now, but im tempted to make her centaur-adjacent. shes very doe with vex's bullshit, and i actually see them being long-time work-buddies, her having helped him with his science papers, and i very much so see her being the one whos down to write and research the fauna of the new planet. co-author maybe. i do believe back on their home-planet she mainly does work as a nurse than a scientist. aint need to search for new problems when there are enough as is back there. still, couldnt resist the possibilities. plus the additional chance of finding and testing new herbal medicines was too great to pass up.

paul's a biologist. late 20s early 30s. in my mind i see him as bald. i dont know why, i just do. tall and chub all the way!!! i feel like it'd be funny if i made him a carnivore. or... for plot reasons, i could make him feline-adjacent. but carnivorous-merman speaks to my soul. maybe hes like. 1/4th merman on his grandfathers side has just like 3 traits and thats it. i do want to give him a fish tail and a few scales, as a treat. pike? yeah. yeah!!!! i can and will work with pike... i think hes the sorta guy who lied on his resume but got the job anyways cuz noone else applied, and they figured if all else fails, an aquatic hybrid would be useful in exploration of any bodies of water. i think he lowkey regrets sighing up for the mission, since it lasts around like. i wanna say at least 6 months to 5 years time-period wise. and hes got a partner and a kid back home. isnt really putting in his all, but at the end of the day knows its at least gonna put food on the table and he gets to tell stories of his adventures when hes finally back.

as i said, theres also the tech crew and additional people on the team, but its probably like 15 people max. but theyre not important anymore, because let me introduce you to a new species and a new little guy as well, whos a part of the main crew.

it doesnt have a name, nor do i think it needs one. but its a member of a native species of feline-esque shapeshifters. i want to make them tiger-adjacent because thats what they were at first as a placeholder. but yk. its roughly 8 or 9 in human years and based on appearance alone, looks like a solid 50/50 mix of tiger and human. but this is all subject to change. the species do have clothes. they have fingers and thumbs (for the most part) and they use them to their advantage. im messing with the idea of their cities built in trees as well, so clothing is also functional. the child does have a family, but i am still figuring it out. also. lets just say the phrase "curiosity killed the can but satisfaction brought it back" exists for a reason. its just a kid. its very curious about the world.

also like. note that i am messing with a possible magic system getting involved. and for the sake of it, the native species do not speak english. they dont speak verbally at all. like wild cats with their colonies.

just. imagine, for a moment. youre vex. its been a few weeks since everythings been set up and running. your HQ is in a clearing in what seems to be a jungle. everything to contact your home-planet has been set up, and the campsite is fully ready. and then you look up at the walls around the mini-compound. and. theres a kid there. staring at you. the species is familiar, human-tiger hybrids are common back home. but. *here*? i feel like vex isnt fond of children. but does he find them distasteful enough to run experiments on them to hunt down one, simply because it was the first native species that you see? because.. what if you never see it again? what if doing it *now* is your only chance? surely sarah will forgive this. right? or.. do you follow it down to its home. seek to develop allyship there... at the risk of being attacked, or waging a war on your home. i feel like the right option to do is to contact the homeplanet HQ and ask for advice. but instead. something tells me he ignores it all and just. takes a step forward. his mind buzzing. even he doesnt know what he did, until he snaps out of it. hours later.

just remembered an idea i had earlier. so like dominic was originally named butch/butcher but i realized i dont like it at all, and i was iffy about dominic from the get-go and like yesterday or smth the name buster came in mind for him. im really not sure tho. its better than butch i *think* but like. decisions decisions :pensive:

[wizkiddx]

hiii could you do one of tom asking your dad to marry you?? thankuuuuu

okay so I don't believe in boys having to ask the dads, because we are strong independent QUEENS and no man owns me ever, but I hope this is still okay <33

not proof read and written super quick so sorry!

summary: Tom's terrified to ask your dad a very particular question question

///////////////////////////////////////////////

“Mr Y/l/n” Tom called your dads attention from the dishwasher he was loading up. The holidays spent at your parents meant a lot of good things- but mainly food. So much so the dishwasher was almost continually on, just so you didn’t run out of crockery.

“Its Y/d/n Tom, we’ve been through this.” He was joking but with your Dad - Tom could never really tell. At heart your dad was an absolute softie, except no one really saw that except your mum and you. Always a daddies girl, Tom knew how much your dad had meant to you. He had guessed before he’d met you parents , that he would be protective.

And that he was, never frontally rude or cruel. It was more subtle - though to Tom it was very damn clear, he had his doubts. As a people pleaser, Tom didn’t like the fact he didn’t like him. Time and time again, he’d tried to prove just how much you meant to him and yet it seemed to fall on deaf ears. So three years down the line, it was safe to say he was bloody terrified. Heart-in-mouth sort of event. Tom did a lot of ‘terrifying things’: talking to massive studio heads; going on stage with thousands of people screaming; jumping out a plane even.

But no, a single conversation with your dad had his adrenaline going like nobodies business. Asking to marry you.

“You going to just stand their gawking? I hope the moviestar doesn’t make my Y/n do all the housework?”

“No sir I-of course I don’t” Stammering his way through with wide eyes, Tom practically leapt across the kitchen to the opposite side of the dishwasher to your dad. Secretly your Dad was chuckling away to himself, taking absolute delight in how terrified the ‘movie star’ was of him, but managed to keep a steely outershell. In silence, the two uunloaded the dishwasher, Tom desperately racking his brains for conversation starters.

This is what he did for a living, learnt the speech he’d spent hours preparing, then retell it. Why then, was Tom having such an issue with the script he’d arguable practiced the most? Deciding he needed a buffer, Tom went to the safe space of small talk.

“So how was the pub? Y/n said you were meeting some old friends?”

“Watched the match, bloody awful game and Wilks was crap, I don’t know why he even started.” Now this football talk was something Tom felt safe in. He had learnt as much as he could about your dads team - just so there was some mutual conversation.

“Yeh tell me about it, I caught the last half. Though the ref made so bad decisions too, that penalty never really was VAR or not.”

“Thats the most respectable thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

The next couple of minutes were spent with both men raving fanatically, letting all their anger out on the pretty subpar game this afternoon. In fact, Tom swore your dad actually laughed along with him at one point. Admittedly he’d caught himself almost immediately- but for two seconds, he had cracked it.

With the last mug placed in the cabinet, Tom was quite frankly shocked at what your dad said next. He had presumed that since it was late and everyone else was in bed, Y/d/n wouldn’t want quality time with his daughters boyfriend.

“You fancy a nightcap son?”

He’d never called Tom that either. Frankly, you dad preferred the nickname ‘moviestar’ because he knew it infuriated Tom. Made the tips of his ears flush bright red, that was Toms tell - one that your dad had noticed too early on.

Jerkily Tom nodded, swallowing down the lump in his throat as he followed the elder man to the sitting room - where he kept the scotch glasses and bottle. No sooner had the drinks been poured, that Tom practically exploded with his thoughts.

“Mr Y/l/n-sorry I mean Y/d/n I-I um I needed to ask you something.” All he got was a long sigh and a nod, encouraging him to continue. “I-uhm….”Tom scoffed, clearing his throat because all of a sudden it felt like he hadnt had a drink in 10 hours, mouth completely dry.

“Well first off-and all respect. I know I don’t have to ask you. Y/n is the most independent and strong woman and we aren’t living in the 1950s. But, well but she loves you alot.” Tom stressed that last point especially, looking up to your dads poker face. It put him off for moment.

It was just how grumpy he looked, it was bloody terrifying. Taking a big gulp of the malty liquid, Tom steeled himself once again. “ And she respects you, your opinion always matters and I’d never come between that. And Y/n, she likes her traditions right? Like the stupid hat game you all play at Christmas dinner which makes no sense to me? Or the puzzle that you don’t start till everyone’s pretty drunk and tired at 3 o’clock in the morning on christmas? So that is… uhm thats why I’m asking you.”

Again all Tom was met with was a stern gaze, once again taking another generous sip of the scotch.

“Look I know you have your doubts about me- “ That got a response, a snort of agreement from your dad as if saying ‘you think’.

“But-but I really love your daughter. She’s my whole world and I can’t imagine being without her. And I know my lifestyle probably doesn’t fit with how you imagined your daughter to have. I mean-I’m not always at home and I’m away for months but- but…. look.” Tom sighed, shifting awkwardly on the sofa to directly face your dads armchair. “When I’m homesick and tired and grouchy from filming and I get back to the hotel I facetime Y/n. Everyday. And just seeing her smile, you-you know, the really soft small one that makes her dimples pop out? One look at that smile and everythings fine. Because all I’m thinking about is seeing that smile for the rest of my life. When she finds out she’s pregnant with our kid, when we’re taking them to college. I mean even when we’re 80 and probably sick of each other- she’ll still have that little smile that puts me into this sort of stupor. I just- I love her. And I’d do anything for her, I always will, I promise you that. So-so” With a shaky breath, Tom delivered his hitline.

“This is me just letting you know that I’m going to ask her to marry me and- I really hope she says yes.”

Tom was almost out of breath, and the breath he did have was shaky, looking up desperately at the older man across from him. He watched with wide eyes as your Dad placed his glass back on the drinks table with a clink, before leaning forward and standing up from the chair. He groaned slitghtly at the movement (his knees werent what they used to be) and took the two steps forward to be stood right infront of Tom’s seat. In that moment, Tom honestly thought he was getting a punch to the jaw at the very least. Afterall, he had just pretty much demanded that he were to propose to you.

As he braced for impact, tensing all his muscles, instead what he felt was a light pat to his right shoulder. Tom trailed his eyes up your dads figure to see what he thought was a gentle smile on his face too. Though he hadn’t ever seen your Dad smile at him before, so couldn’t say for certainty.

“You’re a good kid Tom, and you make Y/n very happy. Just pull yourself together when you ask her alright son? Didn’t think moviestars got stage fright.” And with that, your dad turned his back, heading toward the doorway that lead to the stairs to the bedrooms. Stunned, it took a moment or two before Tom processed - long enough that he had to leap up and call your dads name to get him to halt in the hallway.

“So is that a yes? You’re giving me permssion?”

“Oh Tom….” Your dad sighed in the lowlight of the hallway, in a more muted voice - now they were closer to the bedrooms where both you and your mum were sleeping peacefully. “ You already said, Y/n is strong and fiercely independent. I don’t control her, heck I don’t think she’s ever listened to me and never will. But…. for the record, I hope she says yes too and… I know she will.”

Scoffing in excitement, Tom combed a hand through his scalp, feeling such a wave of relief it was almost indescribable as your dad turned and trudged up the stairs. Once he heard the door of your parents bedroom close, he couldn’t help himself. He ran back into the kitchen, where he preceded to do an excited jumpy dance thing.

Because it meant a lot. To have your dads approval, to have your dads support. That meant the world. Not only for the sake of proposing but also, everything Tom said was true. He wanted to build a family with you - which meant that man was going to be the grandparents to your kids one day. That man had helped to craft you into the person you were today - his ‘person’. His perfect angelic, sweet woman.

Whenever he felt this excited, this happy, this elated - theres only one person he wants to be with. So, after turning all the lights off and checking the doors were locked (with a very obvious spring in his step) he then hopped up the stairs. Tiptoeing around, he got ready for bed in no time, before getting to the highlight of each evening.

Delicately he crawled into bed, sliding under the covers, so as to not disturb you. Naturally though, feeling the bed dip made you turnover- hooking your legs round his and resting your head on his chest. Tom chuckled quietly at your cuteness, stroking your cheek lightly with his thumb. It was enough to rouse you awake, enough to make you acutely aware of the thundering sound from his chest. With tired eyes, you propped your chin on his breastbone looking up at him with concern.

“You alright T? Hearts really racing.” He only replied with this loopy lovesick grin, his right hand coming to cup your cheek.

“Go back to sleep darling, I’m okay.” He did look okay, but he was almost too smiley and even with a foggy sleepy brain, you were still suspicious.

“Whats going on, you’re being weird?”

“Nothing…. your dad and me just had a chat… He called me son.” That shocked you too - clearly the conversation you’d had with him about being nicer to Tom had rubbed off.

“He did?”

“He did…. you are beautiful you know?” Now he was definitely being weird. You furrowed your eyebrows, as if trying to read his mind because something odd was going on in there.

“Now you’re just being creepy. What’s up?”

Tom just leant forward to kiss your forehead, then pulled you down onto his chest.

“I just love your family and I love you, you know that?”

“Are you trying to get into my pants? Because my parents are literally in the next room.”

“Oh shut up and kiss me.”