#ive grown very attached to him and i will cry about him
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same name check lets go, im hooked on orion now thnx (: i dont think ive seen much on him!! have u done general hcs about him ???
I have not. Here goes.
Orion along with his two siblings are the rulers of this universe's hell. This world's equivalent of Lucifer was spilt into three beings upon death made up of their flesh, blood and bones. Orion is the blood devil and has power over it. He has a secondary theme with minerals as his flesh is akin to marble and his innards are ruby like in appearance.
Orion is very self absorbed and the most vicious of the three. Before his sister destroyed half his face Orion tricked innocent mortals and turned their souls into jewelry for himself. In falling for you, Orion sees you nothing but arm candy in the beginning. In his many years he's had plenty of fine pieces hanging from his side and he sees you no different. When he falls for you all hell breaks loose. It's the full five stages with a heavy acceptance. What has happened, has happened and he knows getting rid of you would only tear a hole in the heart he's grown rather than shut it down.
As much as he dislikes eyes on you, Orion loves showing you off in the same breath. We're talking breaking out the collection of jewels he managed to save, plus making some from his own flesh to make you really shine. Fine robes, a crown half the size of your head, he doesn't stop until you're decorated head to toe and even that isn't enough sometimes.
Orion adores nothing more than having you by his side, preferably nestled into his arms as you go about your day as rulers of the underworld. He even carries you in his arms or has you in his lap. Considering he is elven feet tall he can pick you up with one arm and carry you on his hip for hours which he loves to do.
He also enjoys domestic things to a great extent. Something he never did with previous'"partners" Matching outfits, feeding you by hand, deciding which sinner would be best for the new brooch he was making for you together- It's a combination of actually enjoying this actives and treating you so well it tarnishes your romantic view of anyone else for good.
A few more points on his design are his face is completely stone except for the hole his sister gave him which reveals a single eye under the slab. Orion's mouth his attached to his hand. Further more, there is a crater in his back from which he can produce more limbs. You are forbidden from looking at his back, but more than welcome to the many kisses he can provide.
Orion is quick jealousy and quicker to remove any threats in your relationship. Aside his siblings who could hold their own in a fight he has no issue eliminating anyone no matter who they are. He pretends to care if you cry, but he's pissed you're focused on what soon will be only a distant memory.
#yandere oc#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere scenarios#yandere insert#yandere x you#yandere headcanons#yandere blurb#male yandere#yandere imagines#yandere teratophilia#yandere monster#Orion my oc
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I just found your blog and Ive been binge reading the whole thing this entire weekend. I love how you write Ingo and Emmet! and if I may humbly request a drabble about Warden Ingo x a motherly reader who fell through the Rift into Hisui. She dotes on all the village kids, always worrying over Lain and Rei, and is always cooing and fussing over her pokemon.
And the moment she’s introduced to Warden Ingo she just-immediately starts fussing over him. Poor man doesn’t even get out a hello before she’s asking if he is alright, what happened to his coat, when was the last time he slept, etc etc. From then on she’s always making a point to check in on him to make sure his taking care of himself and offers to mend his coat if his alright with her trying to fix it. Just smothers him in affection.
thanks for reading this and hope you have a good day!- Sweetea Anon
Aww! Motherly characters are the best! Very very good!! And thank you!! I’m glad you’re enjoying what I got so far
🍓🍓🍓
Hisui is a dangerous world, and you’ll be damned if the Galaxy Team sends out children with no support. Hell, you’ll be damned if the clans make children wardens without any time to be simply children. You put your mom jeans on (or perhaps just mom pants as denim has yet to be invented) and storm after the kids, Kamado be damned
All the kiddos love you. Akari and Rei lean heavily on you when things grow to be too much. It’s a lot of pressure to withstand, so you always offer them a place to rest their heads and cry their tears without judgement. You feed them too, bandage their wounds, kissing them so they heal faster. Neither really believe the superstition, but their injuries always seem to ache more without your kisses.
Sabi and Lian similarly rely on you. Your visits to their stations are always met with cheers. As much as Lian tries to act grown up, he’s still a young boy, and he often joins Sabi in barreling your over with hugs. The two love you, love that you listen to their rambles and indulge their wants to play. You wrestle them and play pretend so well, always kissing their heads and saying how proud you are of them. It means more to them than you realize
Ingo sees this, before you properly meet. He lingers on the outskirts of your interactions with the children, warmed by how attached to you and your care they seem. When you’re finally introduced by Rei and Akari, Ingo tips his hat to you. You respond by immediately fluttering over and fussing over the bags that hang below his eyes. Ingo flusters from the care, and the kids only laugh as you guide him to your abode for a warm meal and a good night’s sleep
From there, your relation blossoms. You make it your mission to take care of him, and though Ingo worries about you traveling all the way to the Highlands for him, he has to admit he melts at your softest touch. He’s been very alone at his station, so you coming in with your warmth and gentleness, it soothes the ache that seems to never leave Ingo’s heart. He’s quick to grow attached to you, your cooking especially, since his own skills are a little lacking in that area. In return, he finds you rare materials you need, bringing them to you with doed eyes
Every time you visit, before you leave, Ingo takes your hand in his weathered palms, and presses a firm kiss to the valley of your knuckles. His lips are chapped but warm as well, and never fail to make you shudder as they brush the sensitive skin. It makes you ache, a want to kiss him back buried deep within your heart. When the need grows to be too much, you dive foreword, sealing your lips together as he rises from your hand
Ingo jolts, but eagerly leans into you. Finally, he thinks to himself. Now his daydreams of having a family with you don’t feel so shameful
🍓🍓🍓
Ingo is definitely the guy that daydreams about having kids with his crush. Wants to be a dad so bad
~Renee
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Epic the musical Catifed: I remade Penelope’s Ref!
AAAAGHH DJDHFJRHJDHSHD OKAY OKAY, so Ive been meaning to redo her ref for quite some time now, and it happens that I’ve been stressed enough lately to draw her! She’s literally one of my very top comfort characters for me right now, to be fair all of my comfort characters are extremely important but for this situation I’m in right now the comfort I need is from people like Penelope or Willow (from Wings of Fire).
anyways this ref has really helped me decompress and calm down, drawing Penelope has made me feel so safe and secure, literally I love Penelope in Epic so much.
I looove how she is in Epic the musical? Idk I feel more drawn towards her and more interested in her then the Penelope in the Odyssey.
though I guess in general when I say “I love -insert character who appears in EPIC” I’m usually talking about specifically the interpretation of Epic. Though I do have a genuine interest in Greek mythology and I want to get into more media that’s about it, the specific characters I’ve grown attached to are the musical ones!
like- people need to understand that Epic isn’t just “the odyssey as a musical” it’s a transformative retelling! And in many ways is it’s own story.
like- I think everyone can Agree that Ody in epic is a lot more nicer and moral then Ody in the Odyssey,
they literally aren’t the same character, and I hate when I see people bash on Odysseus in Epic because of their opinions of him in the odyssey.
Don’t get me wrong I LOOVE LOOVE the Odyssey and Iliad and other Greek myths but that’s simply just not the fandom I’m apart of.
Yes, Epic is still based on the Odyssey and a retelling of it, but it’s still Separate, and people shouldn’t act like it isn’t or act like what happens in EPIC reflects onto the odyssey. Like- don’t say “oohh but Odysseus isn’t that bad because in Epic-“ Stop. Don’t say that.
if you see them as separate from eachother then it shouldn’t matter to you people’s takes of the characters in the Odyssey because they aren’t the same as in EPIC. And really that goes for everything?
I’ve seen people bring up PJO(somehow???) a lot or that Circe book (literally don’t know the name of it) in regards to Epic and say “but in this!” Like- dude they are literally different retellings and interpretations it’s not like every Greek mythology story is connected or idk- canon to the Original Myths??? And don’t get me wrong you can make crossover AUs! I honestly LOOOVE seeing all of the PJO x Epic things I see!
but anyways stupid ramble over, I LOOVE LOOVEE DESIGNING PENELOPE! AAGGHHDHDHD I wanted her to appear very regal and well kept, she is a queen after all. But further more Penelope in Epic is a character who isn’t much of a physical fighter, rather she stands back and watches with calculating eyes and prudence. She has an unwavering will and a strong composure in the face of 108 nasty Suitors. She’s wise and clever. With all of this I wanted to give her more lengthy and soft features, as Penelope is someone many don’t expect to expertly win a battle with wits. She simply just seems to be the face of royalty. But I also gave her a strong long/thick tail to show her strength, she absolutely can beat the shit out of you with that tail, but she won’t. Because she doesn’t need to, since she has other more “civil” methods of wits to break you down. but in general EPIC Penelope is more reserved and calm, she doesn’t need to gaslight you or manipulate you, she just needs to trick you. She’s understanding and gentle, yet serious and worried. she stands tall hence why I made her that height. she’s also one of Odysseus’s leading motives, and a major support for him. I wanted Penelope to come across as someone you turn to for guidance or you lean into to cry. She’s a sturdy yet soft shoulder to cry on, something Odysseus desperately needs. (also Penelope just HAS to be taller then Odysseus I’m sorry- if you don’t make Ody in epic shorter then practically everyone what are you doing? /j)
anyways thats my Penelope design!
#catifed designs#epic the musical#epic penelope#epic the musical fanart#epic the musical as cats#greek mythology#ref sheet#catified#designs#penelopeeeeee#i love her so much HJDBDJDHD#Odysseus’s badass wife#tall wife#EPIC
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I made this Fuckass animation last night to ATTEMPT to cope with a bipolar episode but i ended up unfortunately really liking it for the way i portrayed the symbolism, so its also going here
However i dont think the tumblrians will understand so i have to explain. I cannot leave it up to interpretation 💔
Explaining this best i can: i will try to crack jokes to make the mood a bit lighter instead of this being a mopey yap sesh
Alot of you may look at this character combo and wonder what the hell was happening in my head when i made this. I promise there is reason for them, but as a short explanation as to why theyre even in the same room, all of my art is multifandom and consists of a wild crossover i started when i was little. Its my special interest 😛(i also literally cannot think of any art piece that doesn’t involve my special interest. Bear with me)
Buttercup was the very first character i’ve ever grown attached to, starting from a very young age. Like, barely conscious age. Before the day i drank McDonalds sprite with my nose and gained my conciousness
Frida is the most recent in my main cast of characters. Clone high got me through some WILD shit in 2023 and shes really helped me deal with it alot (so has jfk! I just decided to use him as a character before i did frida, as i obviously have seen season 1 first)
Both are alongside either my past self or present self. They find eachother standing across an open space from eachother, their past/present behind them
Past me is meant to represent when i was a little kid. Young, innocent, imaginative, and drawn in ‘crayon’.
Present me is represented with an eyeball for a head and in a very distressed state, because (not to get sappy) at most times my Bipolar makes me feel like ive lost my personality/sense of self entirely, and that i am just sortof watching a tv show when i am living my life and doing things. Nothing feels very Real chat
Despite all of that, present me still contains many of the traits past me did. I am imaginative, i can create, i still love to draw, i still have my love for characters, i am curious, yadda yadda yadda
But back to earlier, buttercup and frida (and the past and present) run into eachother in a seemingly empty mindspace, standing in frint of eachother.
Buttercup stares directly at frida, curious to know how the present is coming along, while frida doesnt make ANY eye contact, knowing that past is following behind buttercup. She doesn’t want to see it because Present cannot come to terms with everything thats happened to her, and past represents a state before it all. Buttercup well. She asks bro idk how to write that part (and also the Question out of buttercup are the Only words that would be spoken through this whole thing)
Theres no response out of frida, cause i wanted to keep her silent 😛 (hush little baby make no sound! ) she just simply moves out of the way to reveal Present
Buttercup isn’t expecting what she sees, and doesn’t know how to feel at first. However, her reaction comes across as negative, the past still innocently standing behind her
Frida ends up finally looking at buttercup and past, and it makes her Eyes pee i mean she Cries. It felt really weird to draw her crying because she doesn’t exactly. Do that. But i needed a way to show despite being alongside the drastically changed version of the past , the present was still very alike to the past in many ways, just like shes heard present deny constantly due to a fogged mindset. She feels sorry for the reaction she thinks she caused Buttercup, an innocent relic of the past, a child, to have
Buttercup thinks about it more watching the Frida in Tears in the corner (across from her) and ultimately realizes the same thing. Its still me. She gives frida a Biiiiig faatttt huuuggg instead of saying anything , and frida is suprised cause she thought buttercup Powerpuff Girl had a negative reaction😛
Present sees this and ALSO realizes for a bit that maybe they are still themself. Their head turns into a flower to represent calming down from the distressed state that will Inevitably come back again, and again, and again
Yeah thats pretty much it, idk. Sorry if this comes across as like cringe or anything, i don’t usually post my personal work a lot because im not usually very confident in it. I just liked the way this one in particular came out
youtube
#powerpuff girls#clone high#powerpuff girls buttercup#clone high frida#frida kahlo clone high#fuckass crossover bro#crossover#personal art#multifandom art#animation#Youtube
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hi!!! ive sent all the Logan asks but i have more thoughts to add after thinking some more. so logan and oscar have known each other their like entire youth racing career and i had this idea in my head that logan and oscar sub together sometimes. you also said in one of ur posts that logan has been with his dom the longest so on that note what do you think their routine is, bc we’ve established that charles is a subby little thing and Pierre is more of a “let me do my own thing”, so what do you think logan is cuz i kind of see him being like attached but in like a possessive way yk? anyways have a wonderful rest of your day/night. Xx
*deep breath* LOGAN AND OSCAR!!! I’m obsessed. I have so many thoughts.
So yeah even with this, you and Logan have been together for a very long time. Oscar genuinely can't remember a time where you weren't with Logan. Logically he knows he's known Logan since before you two got together, but it doesn't feel like there's ever been a time where you and Logan weren't a couple, where you weren't Logan's dom.
Logan hates going out without you, will spend the whole evening grumbling about how much he misses you and he quite literally threw a drink at a poor dom who dared to ask him to dance one time. So yeah, needless to say you're always with them when they go out because Logan will be straight up insufferable if you aren't.
Oscar never really minded it, because you and Logan have never been overly coupley. Even when Logan is literally sitting on your lap, you still don't make anyone feel left out.
However, I think Oscar sometimes felt bad around you and Logan, not because of anything the two of you did. But more because he had been trying to find something like what you and Logan have for years and he's been unsuccessful?
He's never had a dom for more than a weeks aside from a team dom, and he's never had a team dom that he really connected with. And then he's faced with you and Logan who have been together for so long that you're practically glued together at this point and Oscar wants that so fucking bad.
Oscar never asks to join you and logan in a scene, because he knows the way you two are. He knows it's not unheard of for friends to scene together, especially if one or both of them are lacking a scening partner. In fact many of his friends had offered before.
But he never imagined he would get an offer from you and Logan, because you two are so obviously made for each other that the mere thought of someone else joining you two is ridiculous.
Maybe Logan finds Oscar in subdrop? Oscar cancels on dinner with him and Logan goes to check on him. He finds Oscar curled up on the floor of his apartment, crying his eyes out and wrapped in a blanket, convinced he's the worse sub ever and completely unlovable. Logan helps him, looks after him as best he can.
And right before he leaves, he makes Oscar promise to come to him if he needs to submit and not go to the dom who did this to him. Oscar is confused, because Logan is a sub too. Logan explains that he means him and his dom, that you and Logan will help Oscar.
Oscar is shocked, both at the fact that Logan is offering this and at the fact that Logan seems confident you'll agree to it.
Logan knows you'll agree because he's discussed it with you many times, toying with the idea of offering Oscar a place in scenes with you because he knows Oscar needs stability. If it were anyone else, Logan would never agree to it. The idea of anyone submitting to you makes his skin crawl, except for Oscar. Oscar can do it.
You're convinced Oscar will never agree to it, until one night a few months later when you are out with Logan and some friends, including Oscar. You and Logan are cuddling in the booth, sharing a gin and tonic (as in, drinking from the same glass because you got one and Logan wanted one but didnt want to move) when Logan spots Oscar dancing with a dom. Which is fine, he's a grown man. He can do that.
But then the dom starts kissing Oscar right on the dance floor, kissing him hard, wrapping a hand around his throat. Instantly you and Logan are both on alert, because no dom should do that without discussing it first and Oscar clearly just met this guy.
Oscar comes back to the booth a few minutes later, looking very disheveled and Logan relaxes, thinking that now he's back and safe. Except he only came to grab his phone and keys and tells you both he's going home with a dom he met.
Logan grabs his wrist, standing up from your lap and pulling him closer.
"Come with us," Logan tells him, "don't go with that dom, we both know it's dangerous. We'll help you, please."
To your surprise, Oscar agrees and you end up with two subs that night.
After that, Oscar joining you and Logan happens more and more. He never says much, never explains why he needs this or whether he has a new dom or not.
But there's this unwritten agreement that you and Logan are his most permanent scene partners, even as he bounces from dom to dom outside of that.
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i am oh so curious about yteh :0 if you don’t mind me asking, what are some of the roleswaps for the main cast? :)
OMG YOU THANK YOU FOR ASKING IVE BEEN WANTING TO RAMBLE ABT IT FOR SO LONG
emiri and sara swap michiru and joe swap sei and kai swap anzu and kanna swap kurumada and kugie swap ranmaru and gin swap hayasaka and mishima swap mai and nao swap real hinako and alice swap sou and shin swap qtaro and reko swap keiji and megumi swap maple and meister swap
i’ll elaborate under the cut so that i. dont clog up ppls dashboards.
emiri and sara swap - woo emiri becomes the protagonist and sara becomes the laughing doll! not too much to say about it (lying)
emiri still has sara’s high survival rate, but sou’s not really that concerned about survival rates as much as he is about candidates/non-candidates, so he has less of a Weird Thing about her than shin does about sara. emiri is a lot grumpier than sara, especially after losing michiru. the main people she directs this grumpiness at are sou and megumi - especially megumi post-chapter one, since she blames her for revealing that michiru had the sacrifice. their relationship finally starts healing up at the end of chapter 2, though. emiri’s reaction to the hallucinations is slightly different from sara’s, but it’s still very unsettling.
as for sara, her floormaster name is gi rinny, a pun on "grinny"! ironically she doesn’t smile or laugh very much - she doesn’t take nearly as much pleasure in the role as miley does. like how in canon emiri was recruited because of her fiance, sara here was recruited because of joe (and to a lesser extent ryoko). asunaro had both of her friends under their thumb, and try as she might the only way to stop asunaro from hurting them was to join them. she’s been with asunaro for a few years now (they got her and joe when they were 15), and helped a lot in creating "kai", so she’s very attached to him! they’re kinda like siblings ehe
michiru and joe swap - michiru pulls the sacrifice card and dies, joe becomes the crying doll.
michiru as a support isn’t too different from joe, all things considered. it’s true that she is a bit more… not weak-willed, but more emotional perhaps? she’s a lot less openly distrusting than joe was, and mostly confides those feelings in emiri. however, while joe was only a little bit suspicious of keiji, michiru DOES NOT trust megumi’s ass. she’s also a lot more earnest in trying to escape with emiri than joe was - both of them are to be honest, they just get attached less easily than joe and sara did. before michiru’s death, she says my own spin on that one line - "i-it’s kind of hard for two girls to say things like this to each other, b-but—! i-i love you, emiri! you’re my best friend!" if you’re thinking this may be gay, you are correct.
joe’s floormastersona is tiad ropp, a pun on "teardrop". he’s even more sympathetic to the participants than safalin, and actively tries to help them out in the most inconspicuous ways possible. he’s still a bit crazy though (cut to the scene with the michiru doll and emiri). like sara, he’s also pretty close to "kai"! they bicker a lot but in the end they care about each other a lot. in this au, joe also manages to salvage "kai"’s consciousness after giving him his positive emotions back, so the floormaster trio can stay a trio! yippee
sei and kai swap - kai died in the assassin battle royale when they were kids instead of sei (also, having been able to grow up and learn about Gender, sei uses they/them)
sei was made to keep an eye on emiri by asunaro! unlike with kai and the chidouins, they don’t really harbor many positive feelings towards her, or so they says hsjsksk . they’ve kinda grown a bit affectionate towards her, but would NEVER admit it. unlike kai, they didn’t fail at being an assassin, and so they’re still an assassin to this day. also, when the dying kai asked sei to kill him instead, sei actually obliged with it! they have been carrying this guilt for a decade! also, being a qkai shipper, i realized that the equivalent to that in this au is sei x reko and i can’t decide if i think it’s cursed or blessed.
kai satou died long ago, but asunaro crafted a replacement for him - ream aster (a pun on "remaster"), the dressup doll. as previously mentioned, aster is close with joe and sara (or ropp and rinny as he knows them), and sees them in a rather familial light. he’s not quite as openly dickish as ranger, but he definitely has his moments hshgshsjksksk. as for the clothes aster wears, they’re kanna’s bucket, kurumada’s bandages, sei’s mask, hayasaka’s tie, and michiru’s glasses! the aster equivalent to rio laizer is ream aker (remaker), and like i said in joe’s section aker actually gets to exist for more than ten seconds! i’m still kinda conflicted on what i want to do with him though.
anzu and kanna swap - kanna and kugie both die in their first trials, anzu and kurumada are siblings
like kanna, anzu’s really torn up by kurumada’s death, and for a while blames herself for it. i’ve said before how emiri is so much gruffer than sara, and how this usually works to her disadvantage - however, anzu ends up associating emiri with kurumada, just like how kanna associated sara with kugie! anzu’s a lot sadder in this au, only just barely becoming the happy clown girl we know and love on the third day of attractions… and, considering her role and the choice we make during the second main game, we all know how that turns out :(
kanna gets to not only be a dummy, but have her sister with her! she does end up dying eventually in the roulette, which is sad, but uh… at least she has kugie there with her? or something? her taking anzu’s role means that she’s the dummy assigned to either q-taro or hinako! if the former, she gets a father figure, if the latter, she gets a close friend. common w in the kanna kizuchi community.
kurumada and kugie swap - kanna and kugie both die in their first trials, kurumada and anzu are siblings
kurumada sadly dies very early on, which i feel bad about since he never got too much screentime in the first place… at least his ass can haunt the narrative?
kugie, on the other hand! in comparison to kurumada, she gets a wealth of plot relevancy. instead of hugging maple to stop her from attacking/kill her, like kurumada did, she hugs meister to comfort him… of course, it’s the same end result :( she’s even more stubborn about the whole "don’t charge me if i’m going to die anyway, save it for the others" thing than kurumada is, except unlike him she doesn’t lie about the reason lol
ranmaru and gin swap - ranmaru is the main support character/emiri’s favorite, gin is the dummy assigned to emiri
ranmaru!!! he sees emiri as a big sister/mother figure, but unlike gin he’s not vocal about it since he’s embarrassed. i really want to keep his crush on sara in this au since it’d be funny, but that would mean him seeing the "doll" that’s clearly working with their kidnappers and thinking "ok but she’s kinda hot tho" so idk. unlike gin’s reason for not taking people’s tokens (him seeing it as being too close to gambling), ranmaru views the sub-game as having some kind of nefarious hidden purpose and as such choosing to abstain. which he was right about! just… didn’t go about it in the right way :p
I FELT SO BAD ABOUT THIS SWAP ONCE I REALIZED WHAT IT MEANT FOR GIN IN THE LOGIC ROUTE. GIN BABY BOY I AM SO SORRY. in logic route his motive isn’t ranmaru’s whole one-sided crush thing, but he kind of views emiri as his mother and as such it’s easy for her to manipulate him. im so sorry gin. in emotion route instead of planning to upload michiru’s ai into his body (since that’d be weird considering she’s a thirty-year-old woman and he’s a twelve-year-old boy) he tries to upload it into her doll instead. doesn’t work out though.
hayasaka and mishima swap - hayasaka dies early on, mishima is a dummy
hayasaka is sort of mai’s teacher in this au! he doesn’t teach her officially, but he tutors her in data entry (since that’s his job pretty much). they have a sort of sibling-y dynamic, which is why he wants to protect her. i’m personally of the belief that mishima knows a bit more about the death game than he’s letting on, although i couldn’t give you a reason why lol, so swapping him with the guy who’s been involved with asunaro made sense to me.
mishima and nao don’t survive their first trials, making mishima a dunmy! he’s assigned to ranmaru, and they’re good buddy chum pal friends. his and nao’s relationship is the same as canon in this au. his presence in the story means being able to unlock some additional info in the office - that of sara and joe! when emiri realizes that sara and joe are rinny and ropp, she’s like… oh shit, i’ve been being a dick to these LITERAL SEVENTEEN-YEAR-OLDS. also, why the hell are LITERAL SEVENTEEN-YEAR-OLDS our floormasters. did asunaro really have no better ideas.
mai and nao swap - mai and hayasaka are friends, nao is a dummy
like i said in the last section, hayasaka tutors mai on data entry! she’s a medical student as well as a baker in this au, for the reason of I Think It’d Be Neat. she also ends up with the sacrifice in chapter two, and begs emiri to tie the votes for her. massacre ending my beloved………..
nao is very silly here. she stabs reko rip. i only realized a bit after making the list that naoreko and qmai swap so thats kinda funny to me. she has shins hands probably (still working out the details but yea)
real hinako and alice swap - hinako lives through their first trial and alice dies, an imposter alice takes his place in chapter 3 (i’m still working out the kinks with this swap)
(trigger warning for suicide discussion.) hinako lives through her first trial yay! however, like alice, she hides in the locker like a dumbass. her fake name is miyado yamada. she takes up the fake name due to not wanting to be recognized - about a year before the death game, she attempted to kill herself. it didn’t work, however, and she became the face of suicide preventation in japan. she also comes from the same orphanage as q-taro!
i’m still back and forth on the fake alice lore tbh. for now, alice had a secret twin who got separated from him at birth, permanently borrowed by asunaro. this secret twin, whom we’ll call arisu because it’s easy, ends up taking alice’s place as a dummy in chapter 3. with the help of the alice ai, he’s able to imitate him almost perfectly. even reko only notices a few discrepancies.
sou and shin swap - Oh Boy.
sou desperately wanted to be a participant in the death game, but asunaro wanted him to be a floormaster. to that, he said fuck you. he called up shin like "hi shin" "HIYORI YOU’RE ALIVE?!" "shinnnnn do u want to steal my identity :3" "CAN WE GO BACK TO THE PART WHERE YOU’RE ALIVE?!" in the end shin agreed to swap places, simply because sou told him about the 0.0 survival rate and he was not having that. sou erased his own memories so that he could go into the death game completely blind. however this had the side effect of him ending up hating the death game and asunaro and wanting to destroy it. him and anzu have that sibling dynamic, which is sweet until you realize that the chapter 2 main game exists. he steals shin’s identity because his first trial told him about the canidate/non-candidate thing, and so he stole shin’s identity because shin was a canidate!
shin is forced to take sou’s role as the fourth/fifth floor’s floormaster. he’s really grumpy and lackluster about it, but he’s really upset that him being the floormaster also means he’s pretty much doomed to die because WHAT THE FUCK HIYORI YOU NEVER TOLD ME THIS?! he’s really one-sidedly grumpy at sou, who doesn’t really get why because as previously mentioned he erased his own memories.
q-taro and reko swap - reko starts selfish and gets development, q-taro may or may not die
like i said in hinako’s section, her and q-taro come from the same orphanage, so they have a sibling relationship like alice and reko but without the "i hate you now because you’re a murderer" thing. q-taro gets replaced with a fake in the room of lies, leading to the route divergence! if he lives and hinako dies, he mourns not being able to protect her more or tell her what she meant to him. if she lives and he dies, it’s pretty much the same, except hinako has it even worse due to being Actively Suicidal and the one person she cares about on this shithole died because of her. fun times
reko acts more like pre-alice-murder-case reko, simply due to not having changed over time like she did in canon. by chapter 3, she acts more like her canon self. when arisu dies in the ch3 roulette, she talks about how she had a feeling that he wasn’t the real alice. she gets pinned to the target with ranmaru, but is much more willing to sacrifice herself than q-taro is in canon, and takes the first dose of venom.
keiji and megumi swap - keiji fucking dies
in this au, their first trial had a hidden gimmick - if the switch is pressed to take off megumi’s chains, the chains switch to keiji instead. there is a way for both of them to survive, by the switch being pressed again… but megumi doesn’t press it again. keiji fucking dies.
megumi is super sus to emiri and michiru, although she puts up a good front to most of the others. she ends up slowly becoming less corrupt as time goes on, though! and in chapter three her and emiri are actually real allies instead of fake allies. hip hip hooray.
maple and meister swap - maple is in charge of the roulettes, meister is the most powerful obstructor
maple is in charge of the roulettes yay! this means she does NOT have to have a crush on sou, and she does NOT have to die tragically. yippee! she feels very bad for everybody but she is simply doing her job
meister also doesn’t have a crush on anybody since he is a grown-ass adult and that’d be weird. instead he’s coded to see shin as a son. he usually acts like regular meister but his emotional state does fluctuates the same way maple’s does in canon.
…that was really long i am SO sorry. autism 💥
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The summer days grew longer and hotter. Keeping his coat on in twenty five degree weather was a crime, so Osvald left it in his room. It was the first day since leaving prison that he would not be wearing it. He'd grown to love it more than any other clothing item he ever had. It fit him perfectly, was warm and admittedly even looked good. He looked presentable wearing it.
"No sweater?" Elena asked as he descended the stairs.
"It's getting too hot for that," Osvald replied.
They were never the type to say good morning. To them, it was a strange and unnecessary greeting. Osvald poured two bowls of oatmeal, cutting up bananas for Elena's, smiling as he saw how invested she was in her book.
"Isn't it your fourth time reading that one? Shouldn't you find other books?" he asked.
"First off, it's my fifth time reading it. And no, reading it a fifth time is fine," she replied.
"If you insist," Osvald said.
Judging her for something so harmless would be hypocritical. In prison, he often found himself rereading the same three books over and over again. They were familiar and kind.
He passed her a bowl with oatmeal, bananas, raisins and yoghurt, just how she liked it.
"Thanks..." she stopped as she accepted the bowl, "woah where'd you get those scars?"
Osvald looked down, trying to figure out which ones she was talking about. There were far too many to keep track of.
"These ones," she pointed at his arm.
He looked down at the rows of horizontal lines on his left arm.
"Was it a monster with lots of claws?" she asked.
A monster maybe, but not quite claws.
Each one was a punishment for some kind of mistake while in prison. When he accidentally hurt someone, almost let his plans slip, or even just dropped what little food he was given.
Well, not all of them were punishments. Some existed only to make the pain of losing Rita and Elena bearable. Emotional pain was a stormy ocean, and he had only a rowboat and a single oar to traverse it.
But physical? He was practically an expert. It silenced the thoughts in his head. Gave him something else to focus on, some kind of problem that had an easy solution, rather than none at all.
Osvald's eyes wetted with tears as he recalled how they'd been made. All his crude, poorly sharpened tools.
"It's..." he paused, "it's a very scary story. I'll tell you when you're older."
His voice was weak and small as he spoke. He didn't want to admit to his daughter that he'd done such a thing to himself. He never should've worn a short sleeved shirt at all. His scars seemed to sting the longer he thought of them.
"Oh, ok then. I bet that stupid monster is sorry it ever even looked in your direction!" Elena laughed.
"Yeah, maybe," he sniffled.
She knew so little about all his problems. She didn't know her being alive practically defeated the monster, or that her smile kept it at bay.
Elena finally noticed he was crying. A concerned look painted her face as she rushed to his side.
"I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?" she frowned.
"Heaven's no, of course not. It's just a sad story," Osvald chuckled.
He took her into his arms, and held her tight. Some other time, he'd have to find another excuse why he couldn't tell her where the scars were from.
WAS THIS YOUR PLAN PIE. YOU GET ME ATTACHED TO OSVALD WITH YOUR FACTUALLY CORRECT OPINIONS ABOUT HIM AND YOUR FLUFFY FICS WITH HIM AND ELENA ONLY TO STOMP OUT WHAT REMAINS OF MY SOUL SHORTLY AFTER WITH THE MOST HEART-RENDING ANGST IVE READ IN MY LIFE. WAS IT
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sorry @hinako-supremacy it got really long and i realized it needed to be its own post so here's my existential crisis ramble about jazz and pokemon
im listening to Carlos Eiene, aka insaneintherainmusic on yt, and his music makes me so nostalgic. he became popular for doing pokemon jazz covers (and a few other games like undertale) when he was in highschool and college. meanwhile i was in 6th grade when i found his channel and it changed my taste in music and me love swing and jazz to this day. in new years of 2022 he announced that he was gonna quit doing covers (after like 8 years of doing them) since copyright is a pain and he wanted to do his own original music and become a professional game composer too. i was really sad but also soooo proud cuz like??? his stuff is amazing??? and its like watching ur childhood friend fulfill their dreams and its so heartwarming. he released his first full original album and its called '' insane in the rain'', named after his channel asjhkhkdjfhsdakfh. i listened to one of the songs (same name as the album) and its a very uplifting song that really feels kinda like a "we did it. we finally made it and i couldn't be more proud" and when i heard it i wanted to cry dkjshfksdjhfk??? it captured exactly how it felt seeing him move on and realizing how much time had past. i finished middle school and high school and his music helped take me to where i am today. i was proud of him, but i was also proud of myself too!! we've both grown to reach the place we've always wanted to be. pokemon music inspired him to improve his skills and become a professional composer in the exact same way that pokemon inspired me to become both a graphic designer and videogame analyst!! and we couldn't have done it without pokemon!!
anyway i remembered this song this morning. and a few days ago, there was a commemorative video that showcased that we've hit 1000 pokemon!!! i think the two together really made me realize how much pokemon has been in my life. my birthday is in 2 weeks, which will roughly mark around 15 years since i first discovered pokemon. admittedly i was really young but i still remember watching the diamond/pearl anime on tv and being both amazed and confused since i didn't watch the episodes in order. so much has changed since then: ive grown attached to other games, got new hobbies and greatly improved in old ones, ive become a dad (/joking lol), and ive gotten rid of my gender. but nothing really changed at all. playing legends arceus on the switch felt the same as playing leafgreen on my GBA SP (aside from the obvious difference of actually being able to read). the desire to explore the world and catch them all is still there.
sometimes i wish i could meet my past self. i do occasionally wonder what they'd think of me. in highschool i used to think they'd be disappointed, but now? i think they'd like college Sumi. im studying art and videogames!! plus i never let go of who i used to be. i think kindergarten me would be proud, and i think im proud of them too. life is good and, for once, i think everything will be ok :)
#long post#im not putting this under a read more cuz L#read my post boy /nf#SORRY IM EXPERIENCING ''5D CHESS + TIME TRAVEL'' LEVEL OF EMOTIONS RN#ITS PROBABLY THE LACK OF SLEEP#sumi's late night rambles#sumi tunes lore
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horrible dream that lasted three days about
-an incoming apocalypse i wanted to get ready for by getting gardening books from the library (???) and desperately asking my mom to walk my dog in the direction of the library but she was incredibly resistant to it
-somehow becoming a target to twin anime girl serial killers because we all collectively saw them do a crime so we had to stay inside but for some reason no one was taking me seriously and we all went to a park.
-said park visit ending in my brother and dog going missing and me running around trying to find them. found my brother but was very anxious about my dog so i left him and kept looking. only to black out and wake up in the convenience store under my dad's chinese restaurant. my dog waddles in and i grab him. theres a video of the anime serial killer girls messing around with the victims of the killing we were witness to. i watch a bit of it before customers start coming in.
-for some reason im aware that there should be other workers but one of the anime serial killers walk in and i lock myself in the freezer with my dog for five minutes until my social anxiety about leaving customers without a cashier kicks in and so i go upstairs to the restaurant
-i learn at the restaurant that another family and my brother's remains were found by the police and somehow that im in an alternate universe where i could prevent this from happening by going with the serial killer anime girls to find them.
-i go downstairs and suck up to the anime girl. she has the personality of toga from mha but a bit more subdued. she already knows who i am and i am a hostage now. she gives me tictacs because i am a good suck up. the other anime girl serial killer is colder. she doesnt fully trust me but i am a hostage that they have to bring along with. i am given and shown the video i mentioned earlier. ots on youtube. the playback says ive already watched a bit of it but thankfully she doesn't notice. its raining outside.
-we start and suddenly it's a fucking firstperson hitman like video game where we go from a train to a cowboy town to a minigame where we have to jump over incoming bulls through a dangling lasso and i die and respawn multiple times.
-one time i become the third anime girl serial killer (but only in disguise) with a bright yellow wig which gets me spotted immediately during our sprint away heist so i had to jump into a river, rip off my wig and for some reason the wig is the only "illegal item" i have on me so i shove it underneath my shirt. the other two anime girls are stacked in a trrenchcoat like a fake adult. they have grown attached to me. i start to feel affection for them. i steal a vest from a sheriff npc who acts as the save point before the bull jumping minigame but i fail the minigame so it didn't matter.
-i watch more of the hostage video at some point, it shows them encouraging a hostage girl to do a backflip and she's crying. but she does it and she starts laughing. i think this is the point in the arc where im supposed to be like ohh theyre not so bad but they literally killed my brother and terrorised my family in another timeline.
-i wake up. not in real life but i wake up in the dream in a house ive never lived in but ive dreamt of many times. it has the secret kiddy cube in the closet that leads to a serious of colourful padded rooms (not dissimilar to a play zoo). it has the broken clock on the cabinet where i keep my trinkets and pokemon cards (in this universe i have a lo t) it has the spiral staircase and big living room windows and the dread of someone always coming to get me.
-i actually think im awake for real. i realize the serial killer anime girls don't actually like me in this reality and while i get up in the dark early 6am morning to turn on the wifi i am afraid for my life. my family is still asleep. but they're alive
-i find my sister's room (an iteration of it where she has a king sized mattress that we share even though its her room??) and contemplate laying down. but i dont. i peek into my mom's room where my brother is sharing the bed with her. i go back to my room, anxiety spiking and lay back down on my bed. the room i return to is eerily similar in layout to my actual real room (Which i register in the dream as a previous room in a previous house we moved out of), despite me at the time only recognising it as a coincidence.
-i actually wake up for real and the anxiety fades because the apocalypse isnt happening and no anime girls or government agents are trying to kill me. massive whiplash that what i just experienced wasnt reality.
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hes neat.
#bkanvas' art#bkanvas' oc#red vs blue oc#rvb oc#rvb#brick ong#i guess this is a reference sheet#ive grown very attached to him and i will cry about him#to anyone if given the chance.#yes i have lost my mind.
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a roar of competitive cheers burst from your hospital room, the boys all piled up on your bed playing in a smash tournament on bokuto’s switch. it was rather endearing to watch the good and grown men argue about which princess was a better competitor (rosalina, obviously, despite not being an actual princess) and, in sakusa’s case, pouting like a sore loser when his favorite — daisy — wasn’t even regarded as a real threat.
he absolutely dominated the next round in retaliation, to the group’s chagrin.
you eventually decided to take a break, the stuffiness and loudness of the room getting to you. the boys, while giving you a variety of concerned looks, respected your decision, leaving you to wander out of your space, clad in the semi revealing hospital gown and fuzzy yellow socks.
it was less than convenient to trudge around with your iv attached to your arm but you didn’t mind. the struggle kept your mind off of what you dubbed as The Incident™, weird as it sounded.
for some reason, the smallest things helped keep you occupied, thanks to your vigilance. your call with doctor yamada definitely helped, his sarcastic, biting nature criticizing some random kdrama had you cackling in your seat until your throat was (even more) sore.
at first, you felt a bit awkward calling him when you physically couldn’t speak but he took it in stride, filling up the silence with his commentary that was much, much appreciated.
actually, all the boys had been surprisingly good about your predicament. it took a moment for bokuto and suga to get used to your lack of responses but they eventually grew accustomed to it and even relished your minuscule reactions to one of their jokes or funny quips.
you were actually, finally, enjoying your time with your housemates and it felt good.
well, not all of your housemates. daichi was a given. you’d seen very little of him after the dinner, only laying eyes on him when he visited your hospital bed when he thought you were sleeping. the look of remorse and shame written all over his face was burned into your memory and you made a mental note to find a way to have a conversation with him in an attempt to clear the air.
while daichi’s situation at least made sense, kenma’s did not. you missed him deeply, and you had no idea what to do or say to fix what had been broken. apparently, both kuroo and sakusa had attempted to reach out, but they were quickly shut down. you could tell kuroo was more hurt than he let on, occasionally catching the tail-end of intense conversation between him and omi, but they were both quick to slap on a smile and change the subject as not to worry you when you made your presence known.
you appreciated their concern, you did, but kenma was your friend too and you desperately wanted to know what you could do to help.
a deep sigh left your lips, the action only causing a slight twinge in your throat as you meandered through the cold halls. your brain started to hurt as you thought more and more about it, stress climbing up your spine and burrowing at the base of your skull.
annoying, you thought, your eye twitching in irritation. headaches sucked mad ass and you were not looking forward to the hell of the one that was building up as you walked.
turning down another hallway, you abruptly stopped, your iv screeching to halt interrupting the hushed conversation that a certain someone was having at the far end of the corridor.
kenma!
kenma twisted towards you, his feline eyes widening in surprise as he whispered a hushed goodbye to whoever he was speaking to before shoving his phone into his pocket and staring at you in shock, pain, and most prominently,
guilt.
pure, unadulterated guilt permeated from all over him, the stench coming off of him in waves. you nearly flinched at the sight of him, the deep circles under his eyes practically broadcasting his struggle to the whole world.
your name dropped from his lips in a low whisper, his immediate reaction afterwards leading you to believe he hadn’t meant to say it aloud at all.
you chanced a step forward at his utterance, and then another and another until you were face to face with each other. you felt his eyes searching yours but you made sure to keep your face neutral if not for the blatant worry written all over it.
his plush bottom lip was pulled in between his teeth as his hands twitched by his sides as if he wasn’t exactly sure where to put them. you let out a soft breath at the sight, kind of hoping he would just give you a hug like it looked like he wanted to.
but, kenma held back, waiting for you to do something, to say something (not that you could) to absolve this horribly tense silence that the pair of you were now enshrouded in.
gently peeling your fingers from your iv stand, you lifted them to sign in the small space between your chests, in clear view of his observant gaze.
you recalled with fondness when a handful of the house members had decided to learn a bit of sign language, just in case someone was in a panic attack and became nonverbal. the impromptu learning session had been so much fun that the group had began regularly meeting to expand their sign language vocabulary and fluency until you all were at least semi fluent (in all the ways that mattered at least).
kenma was a member of that group and you’d throughly enjoyed his witty remarks throughout the lesson and his occasional cute little giggles that were liberally interspersed into conversation. that kenma was in such stark contrast to this kenma that it was almost jarring as he watched your hands with rapt attention, awaiting anything you had to say.
i missed you, you began slowly, not missing the way his eyes immediately became glassy and his hands tightened to fists by his sides.
“you shouldn’t,” he replied, his voice deep and gritty. “not after what i did.”
you cocked your head in confusion at his words. what he did? you had no idea what he was talking about but you were determined to get to the bottom of it if that was what was making him avoid you like this.
what did you do?
kenma’s jaw clenched, the guilt that had faded away for a moment, coming back full force. “i... i did this to you...” he motioned to the healing bruises on your neck and the iv stand still by your side.
now you were even more perplexed. he wasn’t the one who cornered you in the bathroom so what could he possibly be going on about? unprompted, your mind flashed back to that night, the moment where you were heading off to the bathroom, meeting kenma’s eyes for a second when you did.
oh.
was that what he was feeling so horribly about? that he saw you go into the bathroom? that was hardly news and nothing to be up in arms about unless he also saw meiko go in after you and...
double oh.
suddenly, all his behavior started making sense. kenma felt guilty because he believed he was somehow responsible for allowing this horrible thing to happen to you.
oh, honey, you signed quickly, driven to get your point across without him interrupting. you didn’t do this to me. meiko did.
kenma opened his mouth to protest but you didn’t let him, one of your hands coming up to cover his lips. he let out a muffled protest, his breath hot against your palm, eyes wide in bewilderment.
“listen to me kenma. you are not at fault here,” your voice screamed at you to stop speaking but not yet, not until you were done. “i know for a fact that if you knew what meiko was going to do, you wouldn’t have let me go.... you are good kenma, so good.”
his whole body shuddered at your words, all but collapsing into you, his arms wrapping around your waist and holding you tightly.
if you faintly felt the shoulder of your hospital getting damp, you didn’t say anything, content to let him hold onto you and cry it out.
after a minute or two, he sniffled and pulled away from you, his face red and puffy but content. “you shouldn’t have talked idiot,” kenma chided gently, a soft smile on his face.
you just gave him an apologetic shrug and a hastily signed “sorry” before waving him off to your hospital room, sending him a smile as he meandered off in that direction. you didn’t follow, figuring he and the boys needed some time alone to reconnect without your presence there.
taking a hold of your iv pole again, you continued on your way while staring out the window, watching the tiny birds fly by. unfortunately, your little birdwatching stint sent you careening into a hard body, your feet losing their grip on the slippery ground as you stumbled to the floor.
a quick glance up at the perpetrator had your apology dying in your throat. it was osamu, looking every bit as bewildered as you expected him to, a small jello cup in one hand and a spork in the other.
you couldn’t keep your scowl from off your face as you waved away his helpful arm, completely missing the flash of hurt that appeared across his smooth skin. “please, let me help ya,” he tried again, this time earning a physical slap on the arm, visibly recoiling at the contact.
“leave me the fuck alone osamu,” you growled before picking yourself back up and starting to stroll away but you quickly stopped in your tracks, turning your head to give him a menacing grin. “if you fuck with atsumu again, i swear on bokuto jr, i will castrate you and feed you your sorry, wrinkly ballsack on a silver platter.”
with that you were gone, head held high and a wide grin on your face as osamu watched, his heart flipping annoyingly in endearment. he breathed a deep sigh and slid to the floor of the hall before popping open his jello and taking a bite.
your reaction was well deserved but he couldn’t help praying and hoping that things would change between the two of you.
change for the better. change for good.
℗ poker face
change for the better
series masterlist
(●’◡’●)ノ
an - GOLLY GEE THIS WAS A LONG ONE BHT KENMA!!!!!! and samu >:( anYWAYS SLEEP IS CALLING MY NAME, LEMME KNOW WHAT U THINK <3333 don’t forget to feed me :3 also pls kenma’s secret not so secret praise thing :00
taglist - if your name is in bold, i cannot tag you
@boosyboo9206 • @geektastic84 • @elianetsantana • @trashy-simp • @infinitebells • @6mattsun9 • @suhkusa • @katsulovee • @kotarosbabygirl • @fucktheworlddude • @insomniacwreck • @calumsfringe • @saltylettuce • @chai-blu • @al3x1ss • @hawksyoongi • @jooleuuh • @loubells • @kissungjae • @liberhoe • @tetsurocore • @animeoverdosee • @duhsies • @saiKishaircLip • @afire24 • @premiyagi • @kit-kat428 • @doctorspencereid • @daphnxy • @kyomihann • @maer-333 • @sinoflust19 • @peteunderoos • @peachiikichu • @iidanotlida • @yongboxerrr • @kac-chowsballs • @tanakaslastbraincell • @memorableminds • @risjime • @starry-magicshop • @sugavwara • @smuttyanimeslut • @kiwibirbs-library • @haijkk • @airybnb • @crybabygumi • @iwaisa • @decaffinatedtealover • @notameera • @kawaii-angelanne • @rintarovibes • @urlocalsimp • @keiarma • @shrimpypenis
the rest of the tags will be in the replies!!
#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader#hq x reader#hq smau#haikyuu x reader smau#haikyuu smau#haikyuu#hq x reader smau#haikyuu angst#hq angst#haikyuu fluff#hq fluff#atsumu x reader#osamu x reader#kenma x reader#kuroo x reader#bokuto x reader#akaashi x reader#daichi x reader#sugawara x reader#oikawa x reader#iwaizumi x reader#sakusa x reader#tw toxicity#tw toxic behavior#tw toxic people#tw toxic relationship#haikyuu social media au#hq social media au#℗ poker face
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Rook almost has me convinced to watch ben 10, like he's a little😳
Hes perfect man, oh god hes perfect. Hes a genuine sweet friendly slight naive alien catboy man who goes :3 Hes such a little tech nerd sometimes. Hes tall as fuck. Like that man is absolutely over six foot. Hes new to earth so he gets all confused over Ben's funny earth sayings. Starting at season 5 he gets widdle cat fangs. When he says "I am cat-like, yes. But no." I love his relationship with his siblings. Hes a good big brother!!!! He and Ben become really good pals and besties. He has women swarming him all the time and he wants nothing to do with it. Hes fluffy!!!!! When you see him as a littlw kid he has a tail!!!! Its so cute!!! Bumper Robinson just has such a good voice too, it really adds to the experience of enjoying Rook. Just everything about him hhhhhhhhhhhhgjgkfnfofj I want to hold his hand so bad
Like the only downside is hes only in the 3rd series so youd have to go through EVERYTHING ELSE first to get to him. But at the end of the tunnel Rook shall be the reward!!!! You will receive fluffy alien catboy man!!!! What could be better than that?!?!
For real tho, Rook is one of the best parts of Omniverse and, to me, one of my best parts of the series as a whole. But considering how much you have to go through to get to Omniverse, if you're really considering giving the series a shot for Rook, you gotta get committed to something else first. He's a long ways away. Like you gotta actually be interested in like, Ben and Gwen and Kevin and the Omnitrix and Vilgax and Alien Force and Ultimate Alien and the three actual canon movies that you need to understand for plot later on in the show. There's a lot is what Im saying!
And that's not to scare you off or anything, I just need to drive home the fact that theres a lot to watch before getting to Rook. AND there's a lot to enjoy! Its a genuinely good series! I think sometimes I have it in my head that since its a kids show it should be for like, five year olds, and then Im constantly reminded that sometimes the series gets a little fucked up and that, oh yeah, the target audience is like. Twelve. And 12yos are not stupid. So the show is very competent. The whole series is. There is plot, there is character development, there's some fucked up shit sometimes. It's amazing for a show who's sole purpose is to sell action figures to boys. Like, actual love and care and heart is put into the series. Like, Man of Action fucking cares bro. And regardless of any viewpoints on UAF and OV, its still apparent that in many ways, they care about what theyre making. Every installation in the series has made me cry at some point just cuz of how much I've grown to love the cast and they go through some genuinely emotional shit sometimes and it gets to me!
I know theres so many times Ive said UAF sucks and seasons 7 and 8 of OV suck and the end of the show just fucking beats you to death with how much its decided it hates the audience, but dude. Fucking. Thats the only reason I hesitate to recommend the series and even then I think it's worth it. Regardless of my opinion on some parts, regardless of what I think you or anyone new who gets into the series will think of the low parts, I think Ben 10 is worth it. I think the highs and the mediums are absolutely worth the lows. They frustrate me to no end, but that's cuz of how much I care about the series, and I wouldnt care if it wasn't good.
Rook is the tip of the iceberg of things to enjoy my dude. I would genuinely honestly say give the first season of the original series a shot just to give it a try, even without any Rook in it, and I truly believe you'll have way more than just Rook to get attached to.
People like to call 10yo Ben a brat but hes fucking 10 ya know. Hes babey. 10yo Ben might be my fave version of Ben. And Gwen is so fun and awesome and she kicks ass all by herself and her development in OS is incredible. And Kevin and Charmcaster are really good hooks. Every time they come back you get excited to see them again and especially in the case of Kevin he has even more incredible development and I think his change through the series is one of the best parts about it. And Albedo in UAF, c'mon, its Albedo. Stupid little frog man who actually makes me cry cuz hes such a tragic character that deserved a chance and oh goddddd. And genuinely Save The Last Dance in AF, you will not come out of that episode the same person. That episode will have changed you. That is a life altering episode. And Julie!!!! Julie's a great girl! She's a great character! I love her! She's doing her best!!!! And Argit is a delight! I love every episode hes in!!! Hes fucking awful! And Octagon and Rhomboid Vreedle and the Vreedle family in general are highlights of the series too!!! And Attea's a great character! Gaslight gatekeep girlboss as they say! Also, Ship and Zed??? Best pets in the world. They deserve all the love and head pats and huggy wuggies!!!! Duuuuuude, just fuckin do it!!! Start for Rook and keep going for everyone and everything else!
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Thank You For Your Service IV (M)
Thank you @7stars-aligned13 for the beautiful mood board!! Pairing: Jimin x Reader Genre: smut, angst, fluff Warnings: mentions of trouble conceiving, lots of time skips, squirting, face fucking, dom!Jimin, slight role play, impreg kink, dirty talk, fingering, cream pie Word Count: 24,500
Part 1~ Part 2~ Part 3~ Part 4
You hiccup, already crying fat tears before you’ve even heard the news. You fear those words, feel the emptiness, and it hurts your soul. The straight faced doctor takes her time coming into your room, letting out a sigh once she sees your face. It’s from exasperation, but you would like to interpret it as sympathy. She stands at the foot of your bed, waiting until you calm your breathing enough to hear her.
“As I am sure you have guessed, you are not with child.” Those words break your heart for the sixth time and you break down into sobs, hiding your face in Jimin’s pillows.
Six months. It has been six long months since you were wed and you still are not pregnant. Even after all those late nights, early mornings when you’d send the servants away before your schedules began, the remedies and special foods, the slightly uncomfortable positions and pillow mountains, you still are not yet carrying your husband’s child. And it crushes you.
Yes, you know having children is not all you are good for, but it is one of your duties as a Queen. Having heirs is something that only you can do and the entire kingdom awaits expectantly for the news of an incoming prince or princess that they can idolize and adore, so you feel the pressure at all times of day— as well as guilt in regards to your barren womb. You should be fertile at this youthful time in your life. Both you and Jimin have passed every physical examination and remain in excellent health, which is why it is so perplexing to you that you are having trouble conceiving. Rosé, Queen of the kingdom just north of yours, is already pregnant and she was wed to her husband an entire month after you. Twins, you hear she’s having. You’d hate to fall behind her kingdom in any aspect, even in such a trivial competition as having children. She has nothing to do with your family, and yet, you still feel so inferior because you do not yet have one.
“To put it bluntly,” Your doctor begins, looking down at the paper she’s holding, scribbled with notes. “I believe the cause of your current condition— or lack thereof— is due to the poisoning you endured several months ago. It is possible that the potion affected your reproductive organs in some imperceptible way; your kidneys exhibited symptoms of its effects for nearly a month after your recovery, so we cannot completely rule out this possibility. But, Your Highness, the only way I would be able to test this hypothesis is through surgery to visually inspect your organs.”
You shudder at the thought of being cut open, shaking your head animatedly. Maybe you would consider this “inspection” after a year of effort and failure, but you would not take such drastic measures this early. No matter how much the constant failure hurt.
“If my infertility is due to the poison-“ You swallow thickly when your voice comes out as a mere whimper.
“Let us not be so hasty in calling it infertility, Your Majesty.” She interrupts, stare lightening just slightly. She’s learned the tiniest bit of respect since working under Jimin, his low tolerance for rudeness and spiny disposition during medical examinations slowly beginning to unnerve her cold discourse. Many a time has he reprimanded her for speaking to you informally or for her lack of sympathy, and you are finally starting to see a change, though she still interrupts you to interject.
“If my current inability to conceive is because of the poison,” You try again, “Are there any elixirs or pills I could take to lessen its effects? There must be something!”
“Because we do not know entirely if this is due to the poison, I am hesitant to give you treatment— sometimes getting pregnant is difficult for some people and there is nothing medically wrong with them. For now I can only give you advice on conception: try to lower your stress levels, eat more fruits and vegetables for vitamins, and do not over exert yourself. That is all for today, I will be back in a month for your regular check up unless I am needed sooner.” With that she turns and leaves, not waiting to be dismissed and leaving you alone in your room.
It is the middle of winter and the bone-chilling winds whip against your windows. The palace is heated by fire, but you refuse to light your fireplace, choosing to sit and suffer in the cold alone as you wallow in your gloom. Jimin has been busy all day with kingdom affairs, out and about performing duties that not even your father cared enough to get done. The people love him, love how involved he is and how much he cares, and they never hesitate to alert him to any problems they might have that Jimin could take care of. Of course he doesn’t mind, you knew he would never be able to stay inside these sheltered walls for long when he was so used to the excitement of training and battle, but you wished he would spare a little time to cater to your issues. His absence during your monthly checkups is not unusual. For the first three he held your hand and sat with you, on the fourth he left in the middle due to an urgent matter, and these last two he has been out of the castle altogether. Since your third appointment, when your hopes of being pregnant were at its highest, he seemed to have a very negative attitude toward your checkups. He told you he did not intentionally avoid these meetings, and you think that is partly true, but you know that he must hate the constant rejection and is deliberately making himself unavailable when he thinks you will be rejected again. He would much rather hear the bad news from you instead of your cold doctor.
When you asked your father to accompany you, he sort of grimaced and then politely declined. You understand, the thought of addressing the fact that your daughter has not only been deflowered, but is being repeatedly taken in the efforts of bearing fruit is sickening to you, too. Also, he is not very adept at comforting you when you break down like this, face buried in your husband’s pillows and shoulders shaking with sobs.
Telling by the ache in your skull and the completely soaked through cushion beneath your head, a long time has passed by the time you finally raise your face at the sound of Jimin shuffling into your bedroom. He shivers once the door is closed again, expecting warmth but being met with bitterness.
“It is freezing in here.” He rasps beneath his breath, ignoring you momentarily to light the fireplace, moving to shed the outer layers of his clothing once the fire is of decent size. The single glance he took at you upon entering is all he needed to know what has transpired, and he is in no rush to hear the devastating words. It’s only until he is in comfortable attire that he turns to face you, easing your head onto his chest with a curled bottom lip before he’s even settled properly on the mattress. “My love...”
Your tears flow freely onto his chest and he says nothing, sighing into your hair because by now this has become a common occurrence.
“She said it might be,” You snivel, “because of the poison.” He closes his eyes, having suspected the same thing but praying that it was not true. He wondered if the poison would have any long lasting effects on you, or on your future offspring, but dismissed the thought immediately. Although he knows nothing of what the doctor has said, he feels discouraged nonetheless. His past failure to protect you continues to circle around his head like a vulture, tormenting him to no end and making its appearance to pick at his wounds whenever he starts to move on from it. Six months feels like a long time, but it is apparent that his emotional scars need far longer to fully heal. And for that he owes to Jinwoo.
“I am s-sorry for being s-so weak.” You wipe your nose, face red and puffy from both tears and embarrassment. “Half a year ago you had not yet seen me shed tears, and now...” Almost as if the word itself had summoned them, fresh droplets fall from your eyes, looking pitifully up at the man who had stolen your heart. Only, he must have given it back to you at some point because you feel too much these days and you are tired of hurting like this. God, you probably look so ugly right now, you can feel how swollen and red your eyes and cheeks are, your self confidence plummeting to an all-time low.
“You are beautiful and strong, (Y/n), do not ever think less of yourself. You have good reason to feel the way you do, please do not think that you have to be stoic in front of me.” Like always, Jimin says exactly the right thing to ease your mind, using his hand to wipe your wet face and burrowing into the sheets with you attached to his side, his heat warming the icy sheets that drowned you when you had been alone.
You retired to bed early last night, which is why you can afford to wake up with the sun this morning. Jimin sleeps soundly behind you, but his presence is felt stiffly on your ass between the thin layers of clothing. Snow twinkles on your windowsill, probably the last snow of the season, but you find the sun beaming as brightly as ever to illuminate the room. With the weather beginning to warm in preparation for spring, you’ve grown accustomed to the gentle sound of melting snow dripping outside your window. Mornings like these are scarce and you plan to make the most of it.
You attempt to turn and face your beloved, but his arms tighten around your waist, locking you in your position. A sleepy groan tickles your ear, the vibrations of his voice sending a shiver through you.
“You’re up early.” Jimin mumbles, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. His voice is always so deep and raspy in the mornings, his dialect coming forth with a yawn. You could listen to him speak like that forever, but all you can think about at the moment is how good his moans would sound with the added rumble of bass that comes from sleep.
“So are you.” You snort with a sly wiggle of your hips. The twitch of his length against you sends a flash of exhilaration through your system— time has been short lately and it has been far too long since you’ve last felt him. Apparently he feels the same way, his hand effortlessly gliding up your rib cage to palm at your clothed breast with a deep sigh. You can tell his eyes are still closed due to the laziness of his movements, but it doesn’t matter when his tender touches set your body on fire like this.
His lips find their way to your neck as he shifts closer, kissing and sucking gently enough not to leave marks but to get your heart racing with need. “Take this off.” You follow his instructions and promptly shed the nightgown from your body, leaving you nude against him as he presses himself to you once again, this time slipping a hand between your legs. Your nipples harden from the brief chill of the room before you adjust the covers over your shoulder again, and Jimin takes advantage of this with two fingers, twisting the bud between them to send a spike of pleasure down your spine.
You muffle a groan once his fingers begin to tease at your lower lips, spreading them and toying with the outer skin just to build your anticipation. He wants you to drip before he’s even touched you properly, to whimper into the sheets until you can’t take it anymore and call out his name in frustration. Your clit gets pinched between his fingers when he squeezes them closed, trapping the bud as he continues to rub you up and down, and you find yourself panting in a matter of seconds. Soon, his fingers start to get coated in the essence that seeps from you. It’s so sexy that he can barely stand it. Jimin loves to feel your warm juices trickling out of you, working you up almost feels better than tending to himself, and his breathing hitches too when you begin to wiggle in his grasp.
“Look at my gorgeous Queen, getting soaking wet from just a few light touches. So cock hungry this early in the morning.” His words make you quiver and whine, the teasing quality of his voice right up against the shell of your ear driving you absolutely insane. “I’ll give you what you want if you tell me~” You hadn’t expected him to be so playful after just waking up, but it’s a pleasant surprise.
“I want you to make me cum,” You breathe out between pants. “Then I want you to pump me full of your seed. Please, My King.” Your words have their own special effect on him, evident by the lustful groan he releases into your hair and how his hips subtly shift behind you. Immediately, his fingers move to your clit to lightly graze over the hood until you buck into him, only then does he add pressure. Your back arches into his palm as he continues to play with your nipple, having turned his attention to the other in order to provide the same treatment, pulling and tweaking at it, working the nerves until they’re raw and sensitive enough to have you gasping with every flick.
Jimin doesn’t need to be able to see you in your entirety to know how you look right now. You’re completely helpless to his touch, he can feel you writhing against him and heating up the space between the sheets as your temperature rises. He can feel your heart beating hard against your chest— and he wonders if you can feel his from his position pressed against your back. It has been a while since he’s allowed himself to indulge in these fantasies. He’s pleased to know that he still has every inch of you committed to memory and is able to so easily have you at his fingertips, quite literally. These past months, your focus has been solely on procreating in the bedroom and rarely for the fun of it, so this is refreshing. But he still asks anyway.
“You want me to spill my seed into you, hm? Are you fertile right now?” His words slip past your ears as you lose yourself to the circles he draws into your bud, but somehow you manage to catch them at the last second.
“It does not matter, I want you anyway.” The answer is no, you aren’t at your most fertile at the moment, but this isn’t about that. Regardless of if anything will come of it or not, you want to feel Jimin paint your walls white with his love, something you think you’ve become addicted to. You bask in the feeling of having him throb and twitch and lose control while at the mercy of your tight walls, even when he’s pounding your weak frame into whatever surface he’s decided to take you on, and the thought has you galloping toward your peak faster than expected.
His leg slips between yours to prop them open, two of his fingers dancing their way into your clenching entrance, the intrusion pulling a loud moan from your lips. They glide and twirl within you much to your delight, but before you can enjoy it fully, they pop out and slither back up to your clit with a thick coating of your own slick. It doesn’t bother you, you could cum like this easily, but what really makes you gape is the feeling of Jimin’s hard member grinding against your ass. You can feel that his briefs are now damp with a mixture of precum and your wetness as you continue to drip down your thighs and make a mess of yourself, and you can’t help but rock your hips into his motion. You grind into each other with sensual synchronization and soon he’s panting along with you, the swollen head of his cock peeking out from his briefs to wet your cheek, teasing you endlessly.
“Jimin,” You whine, praying that he’ll let you cum quickly this morning despite his teasing mood. Every buck into his fingers shoots jolts of pleasure through you and every press against his hot cock has you throbbing at your emptiness. It’s a never-ending loop that has both of you moaning in no time, and it isn’t long before the coil in your stomach tightens to its peak. “Fuck, I’m cumming.” You whisper quietly, your breath being stolen away by the feeling of your orgasm. Your husband groans behind you, forcing his own hips to jerk to a stop as you roll against him to ride out the waves. He can feel you pulsing against his fingers and suddenly craves to feel you around his member, removing his hand from between your legs to push away his bottoms.
“Are you ready for me, darling?” He whispers with soft kisses to your shoulder as you begin to relax again. His tip glides effortlessly against your drenched lips and the fire inside you reignites instantly.
“I am always ready for you, my love.” Turning your head, you find his lips and savor the passionate kiss you share, a warmth blooming in your chest that saves you from the cold of the bedroom. Ever so slowly he pushes inside you, bringing a hand up to hold your face to his as his tongue slips between your lips. Vibrations mingle throughout your bodies as you both moan, the insertion tight as he stretches you open in the early morning light, his morning wood always so sensitive especially with your recent bout of abstinence. On the first thrust his fingers intertwine with yours, and this is the most intimate moment you’ve had with him in a long while. It feels like ages have passed since you’ve indulged each other in slow sex and you are starting to realize just how much you’ve craved it. “I missed you.” You mumble against his lips, barely wanting to pull away to look at him.
“I’ve missed you, too.” Jimin smiles, his eyes still closed but hand still caressing your face. He uses it to skim down your figure, hooking under your leg to lift it over his own and allow him deeper into your cavern, angling himself until you squeeze his hand with a shaky moan.
He honestly thinks he could stay like this forever: wrapped up in your warmth, surrounded by blankets, giving you all the love and pleasure he can provide. Things have been so hectic these last few months, an odd tension growing between you two that he can always feel but can’t quite put his finger on, but in these calm moments before the chaos of the day, he feels completely safe and at ease. Being King is no easy task, this he expected, but this is the only time he gets to shed the expectations, the pretenses, the pressure and just be your lover. Just like at the beginning of your relationship— and how things were 8 months ago, when the Crown was first placed in his hands.
You feel almost like a rag doll in his arms as he snaps his hips into you, allowing him to take you and guide you to bliss. Your hips rock back into him subtly, inner muscles squeezing around his shaft and gripping onto him, begging him to stay buried inside to occupy your lonely walls and empty womb. Pressure builds in your lower abdomen again, accompanied by a flush that takes over your body and warms you uncomfortably under the sheets. Jimin tosses the coverings aside when it gets too much, sweat slicking where your bodies connect. Your nails dig into the flesh of his ass when you reach a hand back to rest on the muscle, groaning at how you can feel every movement whenever his hips surge forward, his strength jolting you with his slow, powerful strokes. His length curves perfectly inside you, touching all your favorite spots and it becomes increasingly apparent that you won’t last long like this. He encourages you with gentle sweet nothings tickled against your ear.
“My lovely wife, always so good to me.” Jimin nuzzles his face in your hair, pulling you impossibly closer as his hand returns to your breast. “Always so soft and wet around my cock, darling. Are you getting close again, my love?” You whimper loudly and nod, not trusting your voice entirely when you’re feeling so breathless. “You sound so sweet moaning for me like that. Shall we let the entire castle know what a splendid morning we’re having together? Let them hear how well your King takes care of you.”
“Jimin~” You croon as he picks up pace, hips slapping against your backside and filling the air alongside your heavy breathing. Removing his bottom hand from yours, he props himself up on his elbow to look down over you, opening his legs wider to gain as much leverage as possible to fuck into you. The speed and power he achieves like this has you crying out into the open air, uncaring of who hears how wrecked you sound. You’re certain that the guards keeping watch at your door are uncomfortable by the display of lust, but who are they to judge when Jimin touches just the right places within you to have your body coming apart at the seams?
“Cum for me, my love,” Your husband’s voice feels distant as your thoughts float away. You are not aware enough to marvel at the sheer strength and endurance of his hips, his pace not faltering even once. Crumpling the sheets beneath you, you turn your face into the pillow as your body starts to quiver, a warm hand gripping onto your hip to keep you in place against the onslaught of pleasure. “There you go, milk me of my seed.”
Just the simple thought he plants in your mind’s eye is enough to send you into heaven, your walls clamping down around him with a scream of bliss, just as he requested. Feeling him so deeply makes your eyes roll, every stroke kissing the entrance of your womb and you pray he gives you every last drop he has. With only a few more pushes of his hips, you feel his body tense behind you and shiver, an overwhelmingly sexy groan breathed right into your ear.
It takes several moments of gentle thrusting before he’s satisfied, your body sufficiently full of his sperm and skin tingling with the aftermath of a beautiful orgasm you happily shared. Jimin kisses his way down from the side of your cheeks and neck to your shoulder and arm, ignoring the thin layer of perspiration that dries quickly in the brisk morning air. Though soft, he remains inside of you as he settles himself back against the mattress and holds your body to his, lifting the sheets to cover you before the chill returns. You feel safe. Completely and utterly safe and comfortable in your lover’s arms as you drift back to sleep.
But the peace is short lived because just as you begin to dream again, you feel Jimin pull out of you and shift away, attempting to be as stealthy as possible as he slips from bed. He winces when you turn to your other side to face him, sleepy eyes watching as he pulls on his underwear again. You are unable to return the sweet smile he offers you, already missing the way his skin felt against yours.
“Will you not stay to cuddle me?” You ask quietly, unable to understand why he must leave so soon. The smile on his face turns sad, eyes flickering to the door as several consecutive knocks sing on the wood.
“I have many duties to fulfill today, my love.”
‘And no time for me...’ You think with a poorly concealed frown, burrowing deeper into the bedspread when he opens the door for your servants, who get to work on preparing him for the day immediately. Deep down you know you likely will not interact with him until nightfall as he scrambles around the castle and kingdom serving his duties, but you try not to feel the distasteful irritation in your chest and send him off with a kiss when he makes his exit. Sometimes, though, you cannot help but think he was more eager to be with you when he was merely a soldier.
Jimin sits at a round table meeting with his advisors to discuss the affairs of the kingdom, in which there is not much to report. This is a mandatory meeting they must have weekly and they rarely last long. Most of the time, the conversations divulge into unrelated, off topic subjects just to pass the time, and Jimin has no problem with this on most days. He has a good relationship with his advisors and there is almost never any need for him to use his status as King during their discussions. Today, however, his fuse is a little short. It may be because of the all too frequent restless nights he has been experiencing, or from the lack of quality time he has spent with you, but he is far more irritable than usual. All he can think about is how disappointed you looked when he left and how much he’d rather be cuddled up back in bed with you instead of sitting in front of this counsel.
“Do not worry, the Queen has already taken care of it.” Someone says, he does not know who said it because he is barely paying attention.
“Pardon my coarseness, Your Highness, but it is my understanding that Her Majesty has not yet conceived.” The man presents this in a questioning manner, but Jimin can hear the underlying condescension.
“You are correct.” He replies in a low voice.
“It has been 9 months since your matrimony. She should bear your heirs with haste.” The room swells with voices as his advisors begin to talk about you, each taking their turn to put in their opinions and criticism. He can hardly believe what he is hearing. They speak as though it is your fault that you are not pregnant, as if you are being defiant by not bearing him children, like it is a choice that you have made consciously. Anger bubbles in his chest, blood boiling as they continue ranting about you right in front of him as though they were not saying terrible things about his wife. He stands abruptly upon hearing someone tell a story about how his wife refused to birth him any more children because he “was acting like one” himself. Jimin interrupts just as the man is about to make a comment about stubborn wives, his voice billowing from his throat like heavy plumes of smoke that quickly engulf the room.
“How dare you speak of my wife— your Queen— in such a disrespectful manner! Do you accuse her of treachery against me? Against this nation? You have the gall to insult her efforts on something she cannot control, to doubt her intentions and loyalty to this kingdom and her own family? I should have you all removed from this castle permanently for suggesting such a thing, what do you have to say about that?!” He looks around the silent room at each of their faces, all of them looking utterly shocked by his outburst. Jimin has never needed to assert his authority over them like this, but they have gone too far today. Though he is the youngest in the room, he is easily the most intimidating when angry, regardless of if he were the King or not. Drawing in a deep breath, he tries to calm himself, running a hand through his hair as he takes his seat once more. “It is my fault anyway, not hers. It is my duty as well.”
It is quiet for a long while, the men around the table hesitate to speak again until one man builds up the courage to break the stillness.
“Do not despair, Your Highness, you are both still young, there is plenty of time to have children.” He reassures, followed by similar comforting phrases from the others. Jimin does not respond as he stares out of the window, a solemn look overtaking his face in place of the relaxed and neutral expression he normally wears. He wonders if you face this criticism regularly wherever you go, if people who are supposed to be your supporters are slowly losing hope in you. You already beat yourself up about not being pregnant, he fears what would happen if those thoughts were validated by others. Something must be done about this immediately.
It is silent for another long pause. “You are all dismissed.” He says with a flick of his hand.
*** *** ***
Your servants follow you around quite stubbornly, attempting (and failing) to be as unnoticeable as possible, but their presence is the only thing you can focus on. If you sigh too heavily they all come scurrying over, asking what was the matter, offering to take care of whatever task you had set out to complete. Yes, it was your mother’s dying wish for you to accept your loyal attendants, and it was your father’s order for them to look after you, but you cannot help but feel that this treatment is a bit excessive. It is almost laughable when you reflect on it: how just a year prior you were known largely for your independence, and now you could hardly find a moment to yourself. The only times you can get away with having minimal supervision is when you go out into town, where you may request only one or two guards or servants to accompany you.
Since becoming the official Queen of this nation, you have taken it upon yourself to care for the nuances of your society, to help individuals and keep a close relationship with the people. Jimin was focused on many of the larger issues that affected groups of citizens, like rebuilding one of the marketplaces that suffered damages in a fire last week, as well as handling international business with neighboring kingdoms. Naturally, everyone took a great liking to him and his policies and the people offered him immense support, but your job as Queen was to support the people. So, every week you go into town and buy a book from a novice writer, read it, then publish an unofficial review for the stories you enjoy. Not only does this boost the writer’s credibility, popularity, and sales, it also allows you to communicate with your people. Your presence in town never goes unnoticed, and often times people give you great recommendations on stories you should interest yourself with. It is the highlight of your week since all you can do is read in the quiet moments within the castle.
It is now early spring, trees budding with sweet smelling blossoms and the beginnings of greenery, displaying their proud potency in brilliant hues that bleach you into the gray of a dead willow. Still, your spirits are beginning to lift the farther you distance yourself from the castle. Walking through town, you breathe in all of the scents around you. Street vendors sell an array of foods that you do not see within the castle often and your mouth waters as you step up to one, picking out a pastry covered in sugar, something that you can easily pull apart with your fingers without the need of utensils. Before you can lift it to your mouth, the guard beside you stops you, plucking a small piece for himself to taste for poison. As a royal, you always thought this job was unnecessary and ridiculous before, but after the catastrophe at your wedding, you now understand it’s significance. That does not stop you from pouting, however, as you are forced to wait at least 5 minutes before the stiff guard allows you to dig into your snack.
You continue through the market, admiring crafts from artisans with masterful handiwork and struggle to keep your hand out of your purse whenever something catches your eye. This market is not the closest to the palace, in fact, it is quite far from it, but you have found that the most valuable work comes from the honest workers that live in smaller homes and lead honest lives, not from the traders and merchants who buy their goods from others and claim them as their own in the wealthy districts. The people who live on the outskirts work harder, and they are the ones you need to support the most.
“This would look beautiful hanging from the palace walls, don’t you think?” You turn toward Lilian as she browses the collection of jewelry that sits beside the tapestry you are holding, her eyes inspecting it briefly.
“I think it would look lovely in one of the sitting rooms.” She grins. Lilian always accompanies you on these types of trips. You value her opinion and reason and sympathize with her lack of outside interaction. Both of you are in the palace at almost all times and you are sure you both would go crazy if not for these couple hours outside those claustrophobic walls.
“I think so, too!” You agree, turning to the guard who continues to survey the area. “What do you think, Kyungsoo?”
He looks at it for a while, then at the others around it, finally bringing his eyes back to yours. “Whatever you desire, Your Majesty. My opinion is insignificant.” His answer causes your face to fall, rolling your eyes at him because he always says that. This is another reason why you bring Lilian along.
Sauntering into your favorite bookstore, you cheerfully greet the clerk and begin browsing for newly released books. Not long after, two women approach you, one of which you recognize to be the bookkeeper’s daughter and a new friend of yours. She always comes to talk to you about the store’s newest additions, and it gives others around her the confidence to speak to you as well. Today she is with a slightly older woman who she introduces as a rising author.
“I believe I have read one of your books before; remind me, which ones have you written?” You prompt, making the woman blush and brighten.
“Snowflower is my most popular work. It is all thanks to your review that I was finally able to get noticed in the writing community!” She beams, sparking conversation with you and Lilian about the book that the two of you enjoyed so much. It must be more than 15 minutes later that you finally decide on what to purchase, you have been listening closely to all that the ladies have to say about each author and the summaries of each story. There were multiple that piqued your interest and you could not decide so you ended up with 3 books in hand as your friend walked you to the register. One of them happens to be a story following the trials and struggles of a mother who becomes pregnant during a war. Of course you hadn’t picked this book for its theme of motherhood. It promised to be a good read— though you had overlooked it many times before today— and you certainly did not choose it because it was the closest thing to a lesson on pregnancy you could get without purchasing the entire series of “Preparing for Parenthood”, perched on a shelf that you found yourself eying the majority of your stay in the store.
Your friend talks mindlessly as she rings you up for your books, inspecting your odd selection. “So tell me, Your Majesty, are you with ch- ow!” The woman beside her pinches her arm just out of your sight, offering up a tight lipped smile when she turns to pout at her. A short flash of realization crosses her face before she returns her attention to you.
“Am I with whom?” You ask, confused.
“Are you with t-the children! Have you- have you come to see the preschoolers perform today?” She covers quickly with a nervous smile. Lilian glares at her when you are facing the other way.
“Oh! I recall hearing that they will be performing a play today, I nearly forgot!” The people around you sigh in relief at your obliviousness, resuming conversation as though nothing had happened. They give you instructions to the school and you rush there, Lilian carrying your books and Kyungsoo leading the way.
When you arrive, there are only parents and family members filling the auditorium, signifying that the play has not yet started. They chat amongst themselves in a rumble of murmurs, but the noise quiets quickly once you are noticed by a teacher that stands near the stage area.
“Her Majesty!” She gasps. “Welcome, welcome!” She practically runs to you, approaching clumsily while Kyungsoo moves to shield you with his body, stopping the woman before she can get too close. You gently move him aside to allow the woman to see and speak directly to you. “I had no idea that the Queen would be visiting today! To what do I owe you the pleasure?”
“I have come to see the children perform. It is imperative of me as Queen to support our kingdom’s youth.” You smile, noticing a weird look that crosses her face for a moment before smoothing out. Lilian has a tight smile spread across her lips just out of your peripheral.
“Of course! Well, you are just in time, the show is about to begin.” She tries to clear the front row of parents for you, but you insist that the parents of the children should get the best seats, settling for the chairs she pulls up for you at the sides of the small theater.
The moment the toddlers waddle onto stage in their costumes, your heart liquifies. They are the cutest things you have ever seen. Some of them look confused, some are pouting, but most of them are excitedly waving at their parents in the crowd, nearly tripping over each other from not looking at what’s happening in front of them. Even more heartwarming is the reactions of the parents, each and every one of them sitting up straighter and beaming with joy at the sight of their offspring, even the parents who had previously looked bored. Your attention is split between what is happening onstage and in the crowd throughout the entire play, watching the silent interactions between child and parent. You could always tell which tot belonged to which parent because of their reactions. Every child had their own lines, and whenever one stepped up to speak, the parents would lean in closer to the stage or straighten up to send a thumbs up to the wide eyes that stare back at them.
At some point, you had begun to imagine what it would be like if your own child were up there. You scan the faces of the toddlers, determining that a shy little girl bears the closest resemblance to your future baby, and you watch her the entire rest of the play. Her finger reaches into her nose several times during the performance, something your toddler would be forced to learn not to do, and she appears to be quite hesitant to say her lines. You and Jimin would act just as her parents are now, waving at her and mouthing words of encouragement when it seems like she will not speak at all, smiling proudly after she executes her parts flawlessly. Jimin would probably hold your hand as you watch her and you would be able to feel the sweat on his palms from how much he would worry for her, whispering to you how he hopes she will not cry because of how shy and quiet she tends to be. And you would whisper back that your baby is talented and will do great because she is very mature for her age, being a Princess and all.
Your eyes do not leave the girl for a minute and you are so caught up in your fantasy that you almost miss when everyone stands to clap at the end of the show. You rise slowly and offer your applause, cheeks hurting from smiling too much, but you cannot ignore the bittersweet feeling in your chest that comes when all of the children disperse and run into the arms of their waiting parents. And you are forced to remember your situation. The teacher begs you to make closing remarks and you take your place on the empty stage to address your people. Unable to focus properly, you barely know what you are saying; you thank the students and teachers for a great show, repeat a total of 4 times how adorable the children were, speak at length about how much you enjoyed everything, and once you notice that you’re rambling, you conclude quickly and move from the spotlight awkwardly. The families don’t seem to notice as they return their attention to gushing over their babies.
Just as you are about to make your exit, someone runs up to you and stops at your feet, her hair barely reaching the bottoms of your knees as she looks up at you. It is the girl you had been watching, and her arms reach up to be held once you make eye contact with her. At the approval of her parents, you lift her light body and rest her on your hip, the position comfortable and natural despite you having held a child only a few times in your life. You congratulate her and she smiles at you, turning to look at her parents as you try not to marvel at how perfectly innocent and sweet her face is.
“Your Majesty,” Her mother greets with a bow. “I was very surprised to see you here today. I had heard that you often come to these parts of town, but I would have never expected you to grace us with your presence on an occasion like this.” She is very polite, noting how the little girl has taken a liking to you already.
“I believe it is important to keep in touch with my people, and what better way is there to connect with you all than to attend a performance of my kingdom’s children?” You grin.
“I heard rumors that lately you had been feeling quite under the weather.” At this you quirk an eyebrow. She continues. “Many had assumed you were pregnant, so word spread that the King would not allow you out of the palace and that is why you had been absent for the past few weeks.” As if Jimin could tell you what to do. Yes, it is true that you had not gone outside of the palace in about 3 weeks, but that was of your own accord.
Jimin’s mother had taken a short vacation to your home upon your request after you detailed to her your troubles with conceiving in a lengthy letter, and she spent those three weeks improving your physical health with things like yoga and kegal exercises, as well as offering you very blunt and personal advice that you were almost too embarrassed to put into practice. Jimin warned you of how she was unafraid to talk about intimate topics, recalling a specific conversation she had with him in his teenage years, but you were still unprepared for the sheer amount of information she gave you during that time. You simply did not have time to go on your weekly shopping trips.
“That is... not the case.” You reply, adjusting the girl on your hip.
“Oh, then you are not pregnant?” The woman seems surprised and Lilian seems almost outraged, cutting in when you open and close your mouth with no other response.
“We have not been to this part of your town yet, are there any places you suggest we visit?” Lilian’s voice sounds through her teeth, swiftly changing the subject. You didn’t think you would have trouble talking about this, but here you stand, blinking away tears at her question. The girl’s mother seems to realize her mistake when she takes in your watery eyes that you try to hide with a fake smile. You let Lilian continue her conversation as you wander away a few steps, pretending to inspect your surroundings as you gather yourself, until a nearby newspaper catches your eye. On the cover are the words “KING’S NEW ORDERS! PROTECT THE QUEEN” and your heart jumps at the suddenness. You bend carefully to turn the page and read the article, a mix of emotions rushing through your body that almost makes you lose grip on the child in your arms when you understand their significance. You quickly return her to her parents, excusing yourself from them on the pretense that you had to be back at the palace for important business, and you instruct Kyungsoo to guide you back to the carriage to head home.
Upon entering your bedroom, Jimin finds a note on the bed in your writing, reading it with curiosity. It leads him to a familiar place and he hurries there with mild concern, mind rushing with thoughts of what your note could have meant.
Curled up in your favorite chair, he finds you reclining with a new book in hand as you look through the window of your Secret Library. Your servants know nothing of this place, you and Jimin have made certain that it’s location remains hidden, so this is the only place you can truly be alone. To his knowledge, you only come here when something is troubling you or when you need to think, and his mind jumps to all of the worst case scenarios of what could have happened.
“My love, you wished to speak with me?” He asks, approaching urgently as according to your urgent letter. But you remain relaxed and unresponsive as you continue to flip through the pages of your novel. He looks down to inspect your choice reading, taking note that it speaks of a woman who, in this current scene, is just learning that she is pregnant. You take your time reading it, only turning to him after the chapter is finished. When you turn to him your eyes are blank and unreadable.
“Why have you placed a censorship on our people, My King?” You ask suddenly, and it takes him aback.
“A c-censorship?” He stutters out.
“Yes, you recently placed a censorship on the people of this kingdom, have you not?” You look him in the eyes and find that he can barely hold eye contact, his entire body tense. It is difficult for him to respond, especially since you were not supposed to know about this, at least not this soon.
“It is not a censorship.” He evades.
“Really? So you have not ordered our people to be silent about anything pertaining to pregnancy and children around me?” He fidgets under your piercing tongue, unsure of how to respond. “That sounds quite close to censorship to me.”
“It is only to protect you, My Queen,” He relents, stepping closer to you as you snap your book closed. “People can be very insensitive and I did not want you to be hurt by their words.”
“Hurt by their words? What words would they have said to me? I am not a child, Jimin, you need not protect me from words!” Your volume rises along with the redness of your face. “Are the people criticizing me in some way? What have they said? What have you heard to make you so wary of words?”
“Their words hurt me, (Y/n).” He says quietly as he lowers himself to his knees and takes hold of your hands when he sees the worry in your eyes. “What I heard hurt me, and I could not bear the thought that you may hear such things too. I did not do this because I think you are not strong enough to endure it, I did it because you do not deserve to hear such negativity.”
“Even so, how dare you make such a rash decision without consulting me.” You remove your hands from his and he does not reach for them again. “You saw me directly after your council meeting last week and mentioned not a word of this to me. If you had asked, I would have told you that none of this is necessary, that I can handle whatever my people have to say about me because I am the Queen!” Your voice cracks annoyingly as you fight back hot tears. “I should be able to answer them when they ask me questions. And maybe I should hear what they say about me. Because they are correct, I am not pregnant and I do not know if I can ever become pregnant and maybe they should be worried. My sensitivity should not warrant their silence.”
“You are not sensitive, my love, you have every right to feel the way that you do.” You ignore him.
“But what troubles me the most is how you so easily excluded me. You acted without my consent and planned to keep this from me indefinitely— you even made sure Lilian was the first to know so that she could keep watch over me today! What happened to our communication, Jimin? We should be able to talk to each other about anything and everything, but instead you felt the need to keep something so important a secret from me. You could have simply talked to me and told me how you feel. It feels as though we have not spoken in days, it is almost like you aren’t trying anymore. It feels like you have given up.”
The fire in your tone dies down until all that is left is pain, and Jimin realizes that it is he who has hurt you the most.
Lilian told him about where you went today and how you acted. She told him of the lost and pained look in your eyes as you watched the children, even though you were smiling. Most importantly, she relayed your exact reaction when that woman asked if you were pregnant. It was just as he had feared. Putting these pieces of information together with the book you had been reading, Jimin knows that this argument is about more than what you’d like him to believe.
“This is no longer about the censorship, is it?” He asks cautiously, guilt leaking onto his features. You appear shocked at first, not having realized your own subliminal shift from the topic, but then your face twists with emotion and you bite your lip and turn your head from him in an effort to hold yourself together. You are tired of crying in front of him.
“You-“ Sniffling, you try to control the shakiness of your voice. “You do not talk to me anymore. I never know how you are feeling these days because you have been avoiding me.”
“I do not try to avoid you, my love.” He frowns, moving his hand to rest on your knee.
“It feels like you are. You do not come to my health examinations anymore, you can never seem to make time for them.” He opens his mouth to speak, but you don’t let him. “I am always forced to go through them alone and I sit there the entire time wishing that you were there to hold me or reassure me, but I’m always alone. And it may be easier for you to hear the bad news from my mouth, but it hurts me more every time I am forced to tell you that I have failed once again. And we haven’t tried in a long while, I am beginning to fear that you no longer want to touch me.” Your eyes convey a deeper pain than your words can communicate, and the earnestness in them when you look at him breaks his heart. He didn’t mean to make you feel this way, it‘s the last thing he would want.
“I still very much want you, My Queen, I always will. I have been hesitant to initiate anything with you as of late because you seemed so disheartened and dejected and I did not want to further upset you with inappropriate timing. I have also been struggling to keep my optimism, forgive me for my misjudgment.”
“That is another problem,” You sigh, knitting your eyebrows. “I have no idea what you are thinking or feeling. You always comfort me and tell me that I can be open with my emotions with you, yet you do not listen to your own advice and tend to lock up around me. It will not lessen my sadness, but to know that you are just as affected by this as I am and that I am not overreacting would give me the tiniest bit of comfort. But when you force yourself to appear unaffected, it feels as though I am the only one who cares.”
“But I am the King,” Jimin starts, conflicted. “I cannot afford to show weakness or lament in our misfortunes. I must be strong for the people.”
“Strength is not the only trait of value!” You hiss, irritated that he has this perception that is so inaccurate. “Emotion does not always entail vulnerability and the people will see that. They adore how much you care about them, how you grieve with them when you learn of their losses, so why would it be inappropriate for you to care about me? Do not forget that you are also my husband. That is what you signed up for on our wedding day; you married me and the kingdom followed. Why is it that I am never your priority?!”
Sadness transforming into boiling rage, you stand and push past him toward the exit. This is your first real argument with him and it seems that everything that has been bothering you for the past few months is now exploding out of your mouth. You did not mean for your words to be so harsh, yet you could not control them and figured that you should let everything out while you had the chance. Much of your frustration is about your own incompetence, but you redirect it toward him because you cannot handle anymore mental self-abuse. A tiny part of you wants him to yell back at you and affirm everything you already thought about the direction of your relationship just so you could be right about something for once. Most of you, however, wants him to run after you, take you into his arms, look you in the eye and dispel all of your worries by pouring out his heart to you.
And that is exactly what he does.
“My love, do not run away.” He says gently, grabbing your hand before you can even make it 3 steps past him. He moves to the front of you, taking your face in his palms so he can stare into your eyes, hoping they can fill in the blanks between his words. “You are always my priority and you always will be. I-“ He sighs, looking away for a second before returning to you. “I do not always make the best choices, and for that I apologize. Being your husband and a King is far different than being a military general, and it is taking longer to adjust than I anticipated. I love you so much, to the point where I am afraid of making mistakes and losing your heart somehow, so I try too hard to be perfect. I take care of your kingdom because it was yours before it was mine and I know how dearly you hold it’s people. I try to be as tough as possible for you because I thought you would expect it of me when you were feeling weak.” His hands fall to your shoulders. “As a General, I learned that the only way to gain respect and love was to work hard and solve all issues, but it appears that I will need a different mindset in this situation. Because it seems I have become too consumed with work and too busy to show my love for you, and I know I will need to change that if I want to be a good father to our children.”
“You do not need to change at all, Jimin. Who you are trying so hard to be is not the same man you were when I met you. Yes, you were strong in front of others, but you never closed yourself to me. I do not want you to change or pretend to be tough, I want you to be you, because that is who I married.” This causes him to think back to how he has behaved in recent months. Maybe he was avoiding your appointments purposely so he wouldn’t have the chance to break down in front of the doctor or Lilian. And maybe he had been ignoring you so he wouldn’t have to face his own pain that you reflected. He’s been treating you unfairly in an effort to play a role that doesn’t exist, and he welcomes the guilt that slaps him in the face at the realization. He hates that he ended up like this even after all that you went through in the aftermath of your wedding. It is like he had forgotten all that he promised you.
“I apologize for everything, My Queen. I will remove the censorship immediately.” His head bows with heaviness. “I do still want a family with you, but maybe we should take a break from trying, just for a little while. Maybe this building friction between us and the stress it caused has been affecting our fertility. Maybe we are trying too hard and should take your advice to just be ourselves. A baby should be made from love, not by expectation. I do not want-“ He thinks about his next sentence carefully. “I want to improve our relationship first, before our attention is shifted to other matters. We are young and have not yet been married a year, my love, we will have plenty of time to conceive. Let me make up for the neglect you have suffered these past months. Let us take it one day at a time.”
He’s right, your relationship has been strained, and it is not only from the fact that you are not pregnant. The discord between you two has taken a toll on your body: you are constantly exhausted, your head pounds with headaches most days, and the loneliness has changed your positive attitude into one of sulking and disdain. It has changed you. So how could you think of bringing a child into this world when you are at this level of dysfunction? Things needed to be resolved first, and here he is, willing to work everything out with you after accepting his faults. You couldn’t possibly reject him.
It’s been nearly a month since your argument, and things have taken a turn for the better. You helped Jimin realize something he didn’t quite understand before: that as King, anything he says goes, so he has been taking frequent days off to spend time with you. He’s taken you on many dates around the kingdom, showing you his favorite places to go when he was a child, exploring different towns you hadn’t gotten a chance to see yet, he even accompanied you on your shopping day to meet some of the friends you’d made. Being able to spend time with him like this reminds you of what it felt like in the beginning of your relationship. The novelty of seeing him and the excitement you’d feel in the pit of your stomach. Except this excitement is now from your curiosity of what activities you’ll do with him that day and not from the thrill of possibly being caught together by servants.
You’ve kept things fairly innocent these past few weeks, focusing on rebuilding your emotional connection instead of being physical. You’d lost a lot of weight during the months you were at odds with Jimin, but you’re happy to say that you’re gaining it back now that you’re paying more attention to your health and happiness and not the crazy diets and detoxes that people recommended to you to help with conception. What’s more, you’ve been keeping busy by accompanying Jimin on his political duties instead of remaining put away in the palace. He didn’t want to involve you in political affairs to keep your stress levels low, but you remind him that you’ve been involved in things like that since you where a young princess, so this is the norm. So now you happily travel with him out of the kingdom to attend meetings with neighboring rulers and assure them of your health.
This is the first trip you’ve taken, and it feels absolutely liberating. Seokjin insisted that you and your husband stay in his family’s vacation home located in the area— one of many acquired throughout his travels as a collector and salesman— and it is arguably nicer than the one offered by the royals of this kingdom. Perhaps not as luxurious (though very close to it) but certainly more private. You’d take any opportunity to escape any hovering servants. Your eyes sparkle as you walk through the doors, taking in the modern furniture, high ceilings, and breathtaking view of the green valley and hills surrounding you. The altitude is quite a bit higher than you’re used to, the kingdom poised along a mountainside and sourcing its water from the river that flows through the valley below.
You blame this altitude for the sick feeling in your stomach and the lightness of your head, trying your hardest to keep your etiquette and not plop face first onto the huge mattress. You sit gingerly on the edge, aided by Jimin, who kept hold of your arm ever since he saw you swaying when you stepped out of the carriage. He fusses over you, letting out a disgruntled grumble when you remind him that you saw the doctor before your departure and she found no troubling conditions within you— not even pregnancy, which you were disappointed to hear, but not surprised. The symptoms come and go and you assure him that all you need is some rest and you’ll be back on your feet, and he leaves you under the watch of Lilian and Kyungsoo (who accompany you everywhere) while he travels to the castle to greet the King and assure him of your safe arrival. You nap while he’s away and awake just in time for dinner, feeling refreshed and symptom free, much to his relief.
Being away from the palace and kingdom is sure to do wonders for your physical and mental health. Just being here with the people you love is a breath of fresh air, and you can’t wipe the smile off your face. Seated at the table accompanied by Jimin, Lilian, and Kyungsoo, you feel this is the closest thing you’ll have to a family dinner for a long while. As your servant, Lilian never eats with you at the same time, let alone at the same table, but you begged her to join you and fill the evening air with casual chatter. Kyungsoo is your favorite guard and you’ve always wanted to get to know him, but he remains relatively quiet throughout the meal and never lets his guard down, taking the farthest seat from his monarchs to silently observe. Typical. With your energy levels still quite low, Jimin and Lilian do their best to raise your spirits by showing off their goofy sides, telling stories and making you laugh almost nonstop. But just seeing them bond so well is enough to make your heart swell. You wonder if Jimin will have this type of relationship with your children, one where they can joke freely and build trust with each other without being hindered by the forced power dynamic. You hope their relationship will be better than the somewhat estranged one you have with your father.
“Are you comfortable, my love?” Jimin asks as you settle in for bed. This mattress seems to be made from the clouds of the heavens, you’ve never felt relaxation like this. You’ll have to purchase one for your own bedroom.
“Yes, My King.” You return, grinning at the way his cheeks lift. He climbs in behind you after blowing out the lanterns, the scent of smoke wafting gently through the room.
“How are you feeling? Better?” He sounds tired and you have no desire to keep him awake with your troubles, so you nod.
“Yes, after my nap and dinner, I feel just fine.” You don’t mention your growing headache because you’re certain a good night’s sleep will resolve it. You’re feeling uncharacteristically tired, exhausted even, and it’s most likely from the long journey here. Hopefully, you’ll wake up refreshed and energized in the morning.
“Alright. Let me know if you need anything tonight.” He whispers, already starting to drift off.
“I won’t trouble you.” You assure him, sinking into slumber.
“Are you sure you are well enough to go out today?” Lilian sifts through your clothing, trying to decide what to dress you in for today’s events, accounting for the warm mid-spring weather. She is alone in the bedroom with you, Jimin having stepped out to give you privacy while getting ready.
“Yes, I am feeling much better.” This isn’t a lie. Although you felt extremely sluggish upon first waking up, you now feel great. Jimin had asked you about a thousand questions before leaving bed this morning and at breakfast, and you dispelled each one of his worries with confidence.
“I am glad to hear that, but please do pay attention to your condition, Your Highness.” She says this as she holds up a pristine gown for your approval, handing it to you when you nod both at her words and fashion choice.
She doesn’t need to vocalize what’s on her mind, you know what she’s thinking, and frankly, you’ve been having the same thoughts. But your doctor was very clear that you are not pregnant when you saw her before the trip. Also, you bleed 2 weeks ago, and though it was short-lived, it was accompanied by cramps and headaches, dutifully reminding you of your empty womb. So you ignore Lilian’s concerns and move about your day like normal, smothering the tiny bud of hope that tries to bloom in your chest.
“Are you excited for today’s meeting?” Moving away from the topic, she smiles at you through the mirror at the way your face lights up, beginning her work on your hair.
“This is the most excited I have felt in a long while! It will be my first diplomatic duty as Queen.” Finally, you feel useful.
“Would you like me to accompany you?” What she means is ‘would you like me to keep an eye on you to make sure you are feeling okay/ nothing bad happens’ but you pretend not to notice.
“No, Lilian, I want you to treat this as a vacation of sorts. You work so hard my humble, loyal friend. Go and explore the towns, have fun while we’re away from the kingdom.”
“I do not want a vacation, I want to make sure you are alright.” She responds quietly, blushing. You hum.
“Respectfully, I do not need to be looked after like a child.” You chuckle. “I can do well on my own. Besides, Jimin and Kyungsoo will be there if anything happens.”
“Then I will take my leave tomorrow after I make sure you are alright today.” She says stubbornly, not meeting your eyes in the mirror. “I cannot relax in good conscience without being assured of your safety.” Nodding, you accept her terms with a smirk.
“Always a pleasure to see you, Queen (Y/n).” King Jackson smiles at you, bowing his head in greeting. You grin widely as you sit across from him and his wife at the large conference table, Jimin placed closely at your side.
“You as well, Jackson.” Last you saw him, he was a prince. In fact, he submitted the first marriage proposal you’d ever received, asking your father for your hand in marriage as soon as he heard you were of age. He is a little less than 4 years older than you, handsome, bubbly personality, likable and charming on all fronts, and you had no qualms with marrying him, but you also had no desire to leave your kingdom to rule another. As King, he would have you move into his castle and be at his service where you would likely not hold any power or say in most matters involving the people, something that deeply displeased you, so you turned him down. Now he has a wife and several small children, as well as the throne and an entire kingdom to lead. And as of your coronation, he is your kingdom’s closest ally.
“No need to be so formal, Queen.” He jokes, immediately setting a relaxed atmosphere. You are meeting to discuss and update the terms of a treaty between your allied nations, one that your fathers had written and agreed upon many years ago, but legally needs to be reviewed thanks to the recent shift in power. Your father is quite close with Jackson’s own, therefore you have a good relationship with the young King from years of getting acquainted during your childhood. Jimin, however, has no such history with the man and seems rather tense around the lighthearted playful. “I was disappointed when you refused by marriage proposal, but it seems that you have chosen a handsome and competent spouse in my place, just as I have.” He grins, winking at his wife, Lena.
“It was never ‘your place’, do not be so big headed,” You roll your eyes but he ignores your quip, eyes trained on Jimin.
“We spoke yesterday evening, but I am intrigued to get to know more of you, King Park. May I call you Jimin?” Jackson barely waits for a reply before continuing. “I must know more of the man whom I am to be allied with, and the man who married the ever-so-independent princess.”
“I must admit, I am curious about you, too. But if my beloved trusts and acknowledges you, then I will do the same.” Reaching under the table, Jimin’s hand finds yours and you smirk, pleased that he won’t let the other King intimidate him.
“Regarding the treaty;” Jackson pulls out a long document, skimming over the lengthy script that you are both irritatingly familiar with. “Will our kingdom’s continue to remain allied during times of war, help financially and provide resources in times of natural disaster, respect the borders set by each nation without the intention of gaining territory, and continue to keep trade borders open?” He reads off the major points of the list, you and Jimin answering with a ‘yes’ to each. “Is there anything else you would like to add?”
“Not that I can think of.” You respond, Jimin saying the same. Feeling satisfied by your responses, Jackson signs his name under the print of your fathers, passing the document to you for your signature. But you slide the paper to your husband, whose name appears in ink now instead of yours. Surprised by this, you can see the unfiltered comment bubbling out from the brazen King’s dome.
“I would not have expected, (Y/n), that you would submit the powers of your status to a man.” It is obvious that he has already assumed that your action means that you no longer hold the highest authority in your own land, but you are both quick to correct him.
“You are mistaken.” Your voices harmonize into one as you say this, Jimin continuing on to explain. “My Queen has not yielded even an inch of power to me. As I am sure you know, she is fully capable of handling affairs such as these, any responsibility she has shifted to me has been due to her own discretion.” Though his tongue is quick, Jimin is sure to keep a light, non-malicious tone so as not to offend your friend. You’d much rather focus on internal public affairs, leaving international and business related issues to your husband. But it seems others have the wrong idea about you.
The man across from you blinks at this, raising his eyebrows, and you know Jimin has just gained a large amount of respect in his eyes. You find it quite flattering to see him so defensive of you and you give an approving squeeze of his hand.
“As expected,” Jackson hums with a grin, receiving the document as Jimin passes it back to him. “Well, it seems that our business here is complete! Shall we have champagne to celebrate this swift agreement?” He doesn’t realize his error until his wife nudges him in the ribs and he looks up to see your faces pulled into wide-eyed frowns. “Ah, yes— my apologies,” He scratches his neck bashfully. “Then, may I interest you in some exercise?” Eyes boring straight into Jimin’s, he asks this as the men share a look.
“Oh, this is so exciting!” Lena beams, nearly bouncing in her seat as you both observe from a bench on the side of the field. Somehow you hadn’t expected this when Jackson offered his proposal. Your husbands are standing in a marked area with protective gear covering their bodies and gleaming swords, preparing for a sparring match in the warm weather. The sun beats down on you as you squint at them, using your hand to shade your eyes before Lilian appears with a parasol to place over your head. “Have you ever seen your husband fight before?” She asks, staring at your side profile.
“Never.” You respond. “This should be interesting.” Admittedly, you tend to shy away from violence, resenting the thought of people battling each other for bloody glory. Though you are in charge of the military, you never ask for too many details, and skillfully avoid any training grounds near the castle. It may be ironic, then, that you married a General who has seen more battles than he’s cared to mention and carries more scars than he’d care to explain. But you must admit that you’re intrigued by the spectacle he’s sure to put on for you, comforted by the fact that this is completely safe.
“Jackson has been training sword for most of his life, but has never seen an actual battle. I wonder how their skills will compare.” Lena states proudly, sipping from the drink one of her servants comes to offer, dismissed when you decline.
“I hear that you were a General, King Park.” Jackson checks the cap at the tip of his sword, nodding to the instructor that stands at his side.
“I’d like to think that I still am one.” Jimin responds as he stretches out his stiff muscles.
“Even after being promoted to Commander in Chief?”
“I’ve done nothing to earn that title but get married.” The man before him hums.
“I assume you are quite skilled with a sword then, have you practiced fencing before?”
“Of course, it is taught as the basics of sword fighting. Though, I would not say I am a master.” Humbly, your husband lowers his head to inspect his blade, shaking his head at Jackson’s outcry.
“Nonsense! Any man who has done battle for his life is surely a master. Though, I do ask that you do not hold back on me here; I certainly will not do the same for you.” A wolfish grin creeps up onto both Kings faces, mirroring each other as they pull down the hoods of their face guards.
“You’ve said nothing of your own skill thus far, I will not make the mistake of underestimating you.” The match starts swiftly after they take position, Jackson lunging forward and barely missing Jimin’s side as he dodges out of the way.
Your mouth falls open as they move, each motion calculated and precise. You know nothing about fencing, but it is clear that they are both highly skilled. You’ve never seen your lover move this way before, so dynamic and captivating as though he were performing a dance. Powerful and graceful in every step taken toward his opponent, wielding his blade as though it were an extension of himself. He is beautiful to watch, your heartbeat speeding up in your chest as you are enraptured by the display. Both King’s are even in size and capability, but you can see the ease of movement Jimin possesses compared to Jackson’s deliberate strokes, almost as if he were teasing him. Lena cheers from beside you, but you can’t make a sound. Seeing him like this— completely in his element and moving so gracefully— has your body heating for another reason unrelated to the unrelenting sun. You’ve married an amazing man.
“You’re quick.”
“That is a great compliment, coming from you,” Jackson grunts, keeping Jimin on the defensive with his bold attacks. “But I can tell you are merely playing with me.”
“Not playing.” Waiting. One thing Jimin is an expert at is waiting. Patience is his strength, in fighting and in his daily life. He was patient when it came to you, taking his time with each step of your relationship until he was entirely sure that you were ready, that you wanted him. He was patient with each of his military promotions, climbing up the ranks with hard work and diligence until he was recognized. And he will continue to be patient with the next stage of his life, trying his best not to lose hope that you will become pregnant one day, so he will deal with the disappointment and trials with you for as long as it takes.
As soon as Jackson falters he takes his shot, attacking with swift consecutive swings until his opponent is pushed far back on his side of the space and leaves an opening, one decisive lunge ending the match. They both pant as Jimin’s sword makes contact with the center of the other King’s chest, the cap pressed into the padding protecting his flesh. There’s silence for a beat before they both drop their guard, retuning to the start position. Jimin turns his head to make sure you were watching, lifting his mask to wink at you and smirking salaciously when you blush.
“Well done.” Jackson nods. “But I won’t let you get the better of me next time!”
“Your husband is a bit intense, no?” You ask Lena as she giggles, humming in agreement.
“And it seems your husband is a bit competitive.” You also nod, the heat drying your mouth as you watch her sip her drink again. She calls over her servant when she catches your stare and they hand you a glass— Kyungsoo swooping in annoyingly to try it first before you can taste the sweet liquid. “He seems very fit and possesses a beautiful physique, I’m astounded that you have the willpower to leave bed with a man like that, especially as newlyweds.”
You choke on your drink mid-swallow, nearly spitting it out because of her words. Jackson has a notoriously dirty mind, it is no surprise to you that his wife shares that quality— she’d have to, in order to tolerate him. She laughs as Lilian takes the drink from you as you wipe your mouth, turning the comment back on her.
“I could say the same to you, Jackson is just as built.”
“Oh, trust that he kept me in bed for months after our wedding date. It is no coincidence that I have this many children now.” Her eyes shift back to the men on the field, seemingly satisfied with the rosiness of your cheeks. Recovering, you address her once more.
“Speaking of, may I meet them?”
“I’ve known (Y/n) for most of my life,” Jackson speaks up during their final round. “Though I submitted a proposal, she’s grown to be like a sister to me over the years.”
“Is that so?” Jimin grunts, their swords clashing loudly.
“I was skeptical of what kind of man she had chosen when word spread of your betrothal. Wondered if you would be able to protect her as she tends to venture out and do things on her own; sometimes-” He jumps back as Jimin closes in. “-befriending the wrong people. I worried when I heard of the catastrophe at your wedding ceremony.” The cap of Jimin’s sword touches to his opponent’s chest once again, ending the sparring match. They both remove their helmets and masks, breathing heavily as they look at each other. “I truly empathize with what you were forced to experience. I could not imagine being in that situation with my wife.” Both men turn to look at you and Lena, their 4 children surrounding you as you hold the youngest in your lap. It is a sight that simultaneously melts and breaks your husband’s heart. “Nonetheless, after meeting you, I am confident that she is in good hands. I like you a lot, Jimin, and though my approval may mean nothing, I think you are an excellent match for her.”
You look up to see them shaking hands, both of them walking over to you with content looks on their faces. The child in your lap looks up as his father approaches, making grabby hands at your friend until he reaches down and lifts him from you. You watch with starry eyes as Jackson props the child up on his hip, kissing over his chubby cheeks and forehead, but then your attention is pulled away when Jimin stops to stand in front of you.
“Did you win?” You ask, already knowing the answer.
“Yes, My Queen,” He bows dutifully, running a hand through his sweaty hair. It should be offensive how sexy he looks right now, standing in the sun with his wet hair, skin shining with hard work and eyes landing lazily on your figure with a lazy smirk. Your heart jumps and you have to look away before your mind slips even further away. “Do I get a victory kiss?” He bends down toward you, puckering his lips, and you push lightly at his chest with a laugh.
“But you’re all sweaty!” Your nose wrinkles at him but your eyes still lock onto his lips, even as you continue to swat at him.
“No kiss for your King?” Jackson quips, turning to his own wife who is already shaking her head in disgust. “Lena~ Don’t I get a reassurance kiss after my defeat?” The same look Jimin has on his face is contagious to the other King, who grins at Lena as she shields her face with another one of their giggling children, peeking out from over her shoulder. Both men approach with puckered lips, causing their Queens to squeal at their playfulness— you even hop up from the bench to avoid him, taunting him as Jimin chases you around the field. It’s rather immature, but you feel no need to pretend here or uphold appearances in front of your hosts. Lilian and Kyungsoo look on fondly, never having seen you so carefree.
“You never minded my sweat before, my love.” Jimin whispers to you when you finally allow him to give you a peck on the lips, his arms wrapped loosely around your waist. You don’t respond, rolling your eyes at him with a barely hidden smile.
“You seem to be getting along nicely with Jackson.” You comment as you rummage through your luggage, searching for one specific item. Jimin replies from behind the partition of the bathroom, bathing away the grime of the day in preparation for the night. You had both sent Lilian away when she offered to help and she took off to explore the nighttime activities of the kingdom, one of Jackson’s male servants offering to be her guide. You’ll be sure to ask her for details in the morning.
“Yes, he is quite an interesting character. He gave me his official approval to marry you, which I suppose I am grateful for.” Hearing the smile in his voice, you giggle, silencing the gasp that leaves your chest when you pull out the delicate lace garments, your heart rate speeding up. You aren’t sure why you feel so anxious about this. It’s not like you to get nervous about being intimate with Jimin, but you’ve never done anything like this before. Maybe it’s because it’s been a while since you last had him, the recent abstinence keeping your body on edge. Or maybe you are worried about what he will say when he sees you. Embarrassment colors your face as you quickly slip on the set, covering yourself with a robe when you are finished.
“He gave you his blessing to marry me?” You chuckle.
Stepping onto the tile of the partitioned washroom, you stand before the full length mirror to inspect yourself before tying it closed. The robe covers you from Jimin’s viewpoint behind you as he finishes washing up, and you try to appear productive as you move to moisturize yourself. When he is finished, your husband approaches from behind, a towel hung low on his waist as he comes to wrap his arms around your midsection. You can feel his sturdy body pressing into you as he pulls you closer, his eyes staring into yours through the glass when he rests his chin on your shoulder.
“His ego hasn’t shrunk an inch since I last saw him.” You sigh, letting your eyes flutter shut as the two of you sway gently together.
“Well, he is a King.” Jimin reasons in a whisper.
“But so are you.” His arms loosen around you when he feels you start to turn, both of your eyes open now as you peer up at him with glittering eyes, gingerly locking your fingers behind his neck. Your heart kicks up as you watch the easy grin on his lips, the absolute and unwavering adoration he holds for you so evident in his gaze. It reminds you of earlier times, his expression the exact same as when he first confessed that he was in love with you and you reciprocated, kissing him so certainly. Now, you kiss him with practiced ease and press ever closer into his warm body. Jimin’s tongue dances with yours, both of you getting lost in the moment until you are forced to pull away for air. “You were amazing today, General Park.”
The use of his former title makes his eyebrows shoot up in surprise. It isn’t like he doesn’t like the name, it is simply that he never expected to hear it come from you again.
“I did not realize that you were so agile and powerful, I was very impressed with what I saw.” One of your fingers trails down his chest, playing in the dip of his v-line before coyly tracing back upwards with each slow word you speak. “That is not to say that I was unaware of your capabilities, you have found great success in protecting me and my kingdom, but watching you was eye opening... and quite arousing.” His breath hitches in a way that gives you more confidence, courage swelling in your chest that helps you ignore the redness of your cheeks.
“Is that so?” Jimin swallows, curiosity lighting his gaze.
You hum in affirmation. “You must work extremely hard to become that skilled, so I thought it appropriate to give you a gift to show my appreciation for all that you do.” Taking a step back, you play with the ribbon of your robe, amused by the sudden change in Jimin’s expression. He watches you like a predator stalking it’s pray, detailing every movement of your nimble fingers with a heaving chest as you move at a snail’s pace to untie your robe. You decide to tease further once the ribbon is finally untied, only revealing the tops of your shoulders from the silk, holding yourself in modesty until it looks like he’s going to go insane before you open the from to reveal yourself.
Jimin feels like he could faint from what he sees when the robe drops. You are decorated in a lacy white lingerie set that is quite transparent, your nipples visible through the designs of the fabric. The bra of the set extends downwards under your cleavage and he feels his hands lifting to rest on your ribs to touch the material, following it delicately until he cups your breasts with his palms. Maybe it is due to the design of this expensive undergarment, but you fill out the bra much more than either of you would have expected, your breasts round and pushing at it in all the right spots. This is the lingerie set that Jin had hidden behind your commissioned painting as part of your wedding gift, and Jimin had completely forgotten that it was in your possession. He chooses not to question how Seokjin knows your body measurements in order to purchase the present. Eyes trailing down, Jimin takes in the equally scandalous panties that adorn your hips, all parts solid white except for the crotch that remains lacy and see-through giving him a view that makes his mouth water.
You look absolutely stunning, and he tells you in as many words as possible.
“Your gift is not yet complete, General.” The look on his face is everything that you had hoped for, and you wish to shock him even further with your next move. Hooking your fingers into the towel at his waist, you unravel it and expose his growing length, sinking down in front of him.
Quickly, he grabs your arm once he realizes what you are doing, preventing you from going lower. You pout up at him. “My Queen, a woman of your status should never kneel on the ground for any man. You must remain dignified.”
“My dignity,” You half scoff at the notion, rising to look him in his beautiful brown eyes. “I have neither dignity nor pride. You have it all, my love; I have given myself to you completely.” You allow yourself to break from your role play just this once, he needs to know that your words are true. If there is anything he should know by now, it is that you hold no reservations toward him. With him, you are equal and you trust him completely. It is not like you have never serviced him before, but he has never seen you on your knees below him due to his own beliefs and you would like to change that tonight. “I want to do this for you.”
This time when you lower yourself, he allows you to drop until your knees rest on the ground. The view he has is undeniably sinful. You can tell how much he enjoys it by how rapidly he hardens in front of your face. But when you look up from your own spot on the floor, you find that your view is equally as jaw dropping. Jimin looks down at you from over his nose, the damp hair on his head sticking to his forehead and dangling over his eyes, shadowing his features into sharp lines. Every inch of his body is chiseled to perfection, displaying the hours of training he has undergone over the years to get to the level of skill you witnessed today, and if it were not for you already kneeling on the marble, your knees would have buckled right from under you. He is like a statue carved by the gods. And he is all yours.
“If a Queen wants her soldiers to keep performing for her she must reward them, and you are the very best, so I will be sure to give you special treatment.” Lightly grasping his member, you take the time to feel how he grows in your grip. Just the feeling of you running your fingers over his plush balls has him almost fully erect, the muscles of his abdominals tensing as you lean forward to slide him into your mouth, caressing the underside of his cock with your tongue without closing your lips just yet. You’ll work him up slowly, you decide, wanting him to savor this rare occasion in hopes that he will allow you to do it again sometime. Your palm smears your saliva around his shaft and starts to steadily pump him up and down, the simple action causing a groan to tear from your lover’s throat.
Jimin does not know where to look in this moment. Should he focus on your hands as the diligently work to pleasure him? Your tongue when it peeks out from your lips to tease at his slit? The dip of your cleavage that lie in his direct line of sight, framed so perfectly by the underwear you don? Or perhaps those smoldering eyes you stare up at him with, those plotting, gorgeous eyes that call to his deepest desires? You look as if you would do anything for him at this moment— you have intentionally put yourself at his feet to show how vulnerable you are willing to be with him, that you trust him to the utmost degree and you would sink this low, literally, to demonstrate that.
“Shit,” Jimin curses, eyes trained on the way your lips wrap around his reddening tip. You sense his hands fidgeting at his sides, so you take them to place on top of your head, nodding encouragingly until he weaves his fingers into your hair. He throbs in your mouth and you fight back a smirk.
Working meticulously, you take the time to circle your tongue around every sensitive place at his cockhead, licking slowly over his frenulum and flicking over his slit as it starts to leak. The flavor is slightly salty and entirely him, and it makes your legs press together from where your knees dig into the polished marble. Your lips and tongue play at his upper half for a while, one of your hands rubbing whimsical patterns along his tensing thigh while the other tends to his aching base, pumping in time with your mouth with a slight twist to your wrist that has his fingers tightening against your scalp.
“Are you enjoying your gift?” You break away to speak, twirling your tongue around the line of saliva that connects you to his tip in the most lewd way possible.
“Yes,” Jimin pants, clearing his throat when his voice comes out raspy. But the sound makes you drip into your designer panties, the flimsy material doing little against your increasing wetness. “How did you become so skilled at this, My Queen? You are such an angel but possess devilish talent with that pretty mouth of yours.”
“I had an excellent teacher.” You wink up at him, hoping he was imaging all the times he guided you when you wished to taste him, becoming more confident as time passed and you no longer feared your gag reflex. You figure now is a good time to demonstrate just how well you absorbed those lessons, you finally sink further down on him until he touches the back of your mouth, collecting your spit to slick him before pushing him deeper and into your throat. Your stomach quivers as you hold back the urge to gag, but he sees none of that because when you look up his head is tossed back in ecstasy and concentration. He must focus so he doesn’t cum so soon.
“Just like that.” Biting into the plush of his bottom lip, Jimin falls into the trance of your movements, bobbing up and down on him with his tip lodged in your throat. The first moan he lets out has a shiver crawling up your spine, deep and loud so it echoes against every surface of the room. Drool slides out of your mouth as you continue to suck him but you pay no mind to it, only focused on the way your lover’s body reacts to you. His chest heaves for breath and you can see perspiration beginning to coat his chest and neck, Adam’s apple bobbing every time he swallows. The hand that was previously occupied with the rest of his length moves to his balls, kneading and massaging the sack gently as more moans pour from his mouth. Your clit throbs the longer you suck on him, his cock now at full length and hardness and feeling so thick and heavy on your jaw that you can’t help but fantasize about feeling it inside you again.
His hips eventually begin to twitch and rock into each of your movements, but you can tell he is restraining himself from bucking into you fully. When his eyes connect with yours again, you nod as best you can, pulling off slightly to take a few deep breaths and kiss along his silky skin. Once you have your breathing back to normal, you poise yourself with your mouth open wide and tongue poking out, the sight of you inviting him into your warmth while dressed so scantly and looking up at him with such confidence making it incredibly difficult for him to keep his composure. Here you are, his Queen, the ruler of an entire kingdom by birth right who possesses such elegance and high esteem, sitting below him and offering your throat for his pleasure. This is something that no one else in the entire world will ever see and he feels something similar to pride swelling in his chest at that fact. He knows what you are silently asking him to do, so he does not keep you waiting a second longer before inserting himself back into your mouth and easing his way in until your nose is nestled in the trimmed hair above his pubic bone.
Curses leave him in a continuous string as he takes time to adjust to the sensation, a lightness filling your head that makes you feel like you are floating through the clouds. And that feeling only increases when he starts to move, pulling his hips back for you to take in air through your nose before thrusting in again. Jimin fucks your mouth slowly at first, warming you up to it before he starts to get a bit rougher and visibly more eager, his lips sucked into his mouth as he glares down at you. In any other context, you would think him angry if he ever peered at anyone this intensely, but now you only feel the pool of arousal that builds in your core and gushes out of you at the intimidating glower. Still, his muscles are rigid with hesitance.
“May I go faster?” He breathes, never pulling out to free your mouth to respond. You moan out an answer as best you can, running your tongue against him in approval until he finally releases his tension and follows the urges of his body. He doesn’t aim deep into you, but his pace is quick, surely bruising your esophagus, yet you cannot bring yourself to be bothered. The sensation is indescribable, his hands cupping the back of your head and the sheer heat of his body almost overrides the lack of oxygen in your lungs— and simply imagining the pleasure he is feeling because of you has electricity shooting down to your core. Jimin has his eyes glued to the sight of his cock disappearing into your mouth, but they quickly shift when your hands find their way to your chest to pull down the bra just enough so your nipples poke out, both hands pushing your breasts together to give him a sight that almost causes him to lose his load right then and there. His hips lose control, stuttering and twitching as his eyes widen comically at the dream-like image of you, and he is forced to pull away after little over a minute of fucking your face. “Fuck-!”
“Is something the matter?” You ask innocently, knees screaming out from your sustained position. The veins in your husband’s hand bulge as he grips himself so tightly his knuckles turn white, his length jumping every time he opens his eyes to look at you. His use of hard profanity is enough to tell you how much you have unraveled him and you revel in the accomplishment.
“Get up here.” He pants, taking your arm in his free hand and helping you to your feet. You hear him click his tongue at the redness of your knees, but don’t have much time to dismiss it before his lips are on yours. Jimin kisses you deeply as if your face is not sloppy with saliva and his precum. He kisses you like it could save lives. And above every filthy thing you have done with him, this kiss is what makes you feel a bashful heat color your cheeks when he pulls you closer.
“Am I to assume I performed well?” You mumble against his lips, eyes crossing slightly to see his smile.
“You were outstanding. So much so that I nearly came down your pretty throat.” Smugly, Jimin unclips your bra, parting from your lips after several minutes of kissing to trace his tongue down your neck until he reaches your chest, forgoing all teasing to wrap his lips around a pert nipple.
“Oh-“ A surprised yelp leaves you and he has to use his strength to keep you from falling over, your legs suddenly feeling like jelly. Your fingers card through his drying hair, tugging at the unbothered man as he has his fun marking and sucking at you. As always, his mouth works miracles, but you have never felt anything like this before. Each swipe of his tongue around your nub has you moaning out his name, when he twists at the other nipple your head falls back in absolute bliss. He’s not doing anything extraordinarily notable, but it is like your body has reached a sensitivity that is completely new to you both. Jimin certainly is enjoying it immensely. His eyes are closed but you can see how they crinkle gleefully at the sides, his cheekbones high almost as if trying to conceal his amusement at your reactions. With puckered lips, he suctions one of your nipples before pulling back to speak.
“I can’t wait,” He grazes his teeth over your other tit before continuing. “-until these fill up with milk for our baby. I’m sure you will look incredible carrying our child inside you— even more amazing than you already look, my love. So round and plump... your cute little womb filled to the brim with my cum and baby.” Your eyes roll when one of his hands slips down your panties to tease at your lips. A growl resonates in his chest at the feel of your wetness. “You like the sound of that, don’t you? What would the people say if they found out that their elegant Queen got soaking wet just from sucking cock and thinking of getting her pussy stuffed full of cum? Hmm? Surely they will know how filthy you are once they see you swollen with my child, walking around the kingdom so shamelessly after getting marked by my seed. They’ll know just how good you’ve been for me, darling.”
“I want them to know I’m yours; I want to be pregnant with your baby so badly!” You sob, hips bucking into his hand as soon as he makes contact with your clit.
He soothes you with soft kisses along your face, ending with a lick to the corner of your mouth as you pant out loud moans for him. “I know, love. The time will come soon enough.”
Once again his lips return to your chest, and the combination of his mouth and fingers has your walls fluttering and clenching around nothing. Even after he removes his hand from your panties to hold you closer to him, you feel the building of an orgasm. Your body is completely taken by his tongue and teeth as they suckle cherry blossoms into your skin. And when his wet fingers travel up to twist at your unattended nipple, you feel your body careening off the edge unexpectedly.
“J-Jimin, I-“ Your sentence is cut short by a long whimper, mind going blank at the pleasure. You are able to feel how your walls snap open and closed, each pulse growing more intense as the high drags on for what seems like an eternity to you. Jimin groans at the sounds you make and he looks on in awe from where he still laves at your breast as you bite down on your lower lip to ground yourself. He doesn’t mind the way you tug at his roots in your bliss. The pain only adds to the throbbing of his cock.
“So sexy,” He murmurs as you regain your senses. You seem embarrassed, unable to meet his eyes, and he questions it.
“I have never-“ Averting your eyes to the ground, you look for words in your scrambled mind.
“You’ve never cum like that before?” For some reason you find it slightly humiliating and you have no idea why. Were you really that sensitive from not having sex with him for a few weeks? Your nipples were never that receptive before. Nodding in agreement, you hide your face until Jimin lifts your chin with his finger. “Do not shy away from me, My Queen. You look gorgeous when you cum.” Before you can process it, his hands are yanking down your ruined panties, drenched all the way through and dripping. Your back connects with the wall next to the mirror as you are pinned against the surface with his weight. His fingers slide over your clit and you jolt, attempting to close your legs, but he is faster and jams his thigh between yours to hold you open. “In fact, you look so good that I want to see you do it again.”
Without warning, he plunges 2 fingers knuckle deep into you, searching with little trouble for that spongey area inside you. You are wet enough to lubricate his fingers until he drips down his hand, the slick part of his palm beginning to rub harshly against your clit when his fingers curl upwards.
“Oh fuck,” You gasp brokenly when he reaches your spot. Feeling you clench, Jimin hums and goes to work massaging the area with the pads of his fingers, pressing his other hand to your lower stomach to increase the pressure. Since the first time you squirted he has been almost obsessed with the sight, working diligently to figure out how to make you do it again. There have been many nights dedicated solely to that cause— nights that you endured with bright red cheeks each time he made fun of your fucked out expression and hoarse voice— it is to the point where he now knows your every weakness and can manipulate your body with mastery. He knows exactly how much pressure you like when his fingers are deep inside you. He knows just the right way to massage that sensitive area to get you to fall apart again even if you feel overstimulated. He knows how to move his entire arm to hit that spot each time without fail, his technique flawless as he moves rapidly inside your clenching heat. Almost like a balloon filling with water, you feel another high building up in your core frighteningly fast and the lewd squelch coming from between your legs soon becomes the loudest noise in the room.
“Let go for me,” Jimin encourages into your skin, burying his face in the crook of your neck and panting hot breaths. It is easy to tell how easily he gets himself worked up when pleasuring you. His hard, wet cock twitches incessantly against your thigh, teasingly close to where you want him, and the feeling alone has you galloping closer to your second release. “You look so beautiful like this, pushed against a wall and taking my fingers. I bet you are just starving for my cock, aren’t you, My Queen? I’ll give it to you right after you cum for me. I want you to show me how badly you want it by soaking my arm with your sweet juices.”
The filthy words he feeds you only add to the hunger you feel for him. One of your legs lifts to wrap around his waist, pulling him closer as the balloon in your core continues to grow. Your heart is in your ears, beating rapidly, and you have no other choice but to listen to him and release your pleasure. With one synchronized prod of his fingers and circle around your clit, you descend into depraved ecstasy and let the balloon pop. You black out slightly, ears ringing and body numb to the world except for everywhere that your husband touches you, but you are aware of the satisfied moan he gives at your obedience. Whispers of delicate praises tickle your chest as he rests his forehead on your collarbone to watch you soil the floors and his lower half with your clear cum. The sound of it splashing and splattering against each nearby surface is quite embarrassing but you can’t bring yourself to think of it when your legs are shaking this hard and your body is tingling with joy.
“Good girl,” You hear Jimin groan, pulling his fingers from you to wrap his arms around your waist so you don’t topple over on your wobbly leg. He figures it may just be easier to keep you up if both of your legs are off the wet floor, so he moves your other leg to wind around his waist before carrying you out of the room and away from the mess to the bed.
Your glazed eyes take him in as he stands above you, a hand running through his disheveled hair as he studies you as well. His face is flushed and sweaty and his chest rises and falls quickly, but you’re sure that is only partly due to the effort he has just put in. There are claw marks on his shoulders and you gasp. You hadn’t realized you were gripping him so tightly, but he doesn’t seem to mind the marks at all, focused entirely on the throbbing member between his legs. Your eyes drop down his toned body to where his hand leisurely strokes up and down his shaft, purposely avoiding the tip to keep himself on the edge. It is almost purple with built up pressure, likely painful by this point, and you will yourself to move your weak limbs to reach out for him, pulling him closer to invite him between your open legs.
He takes his place at your center, one hand pressing into the soft mattress beside your head as he leans over you. You want him to kiss you so badly, but you want him inside you even more. He acquiescences this by sliding into you smoothly before swooping down for your lips.
“Mm~ Jimin!” The thick girth of his shaft stretches you perfectly, ignorant of your ticklish sensitivity as it searches for the deepest spot within you. In no time at all Jimin’s hips are flush with your ass, lips and tongue swallowing your moans into his own mouth.
“(Y/n)-“ He moans in response. Eyes squeezed tight, he forces himself to remain still. “I lose my breath every time I take this dripping pussy of yours. I’ll never get used to it.” Flattered, you hide your face with his by pulling him in for another kiss. The two of you stay like this for a long while, adjusting to each other’s bodies and basking in the intimacy of the moment.
“My love, please move.” You whine when the stillness becomes unbearable, yet you grieve at the loss of his heat when he leans away to pull you closer to the edge of the bed.
The first thrust of his hips already has you squirming. Your slick makes it so easy for him to pump into you that he barely has to put in any effort at all, his hips snapping sharply into you from the beginning. You let your legs fall farther apart at his sides and bite your lip when Jimin’s eyes land between your thighs, staring intently at the place where your bodies connect. You’re sure he can see everything, from the way your lips spread open around his wide member, to the shiny streaks of your arousal that quickly slick the inside of your thighs. It’s like you can feel his gaze caressing you, your body feeling sensitive everywhere he studies. You moan unabashedly at the sensation.
“Do you like it, My Queen? Does this feel good?” He prompts, eager for your praise.
“Y-yes, I-“ It has been so long without his cock inside you that you can’t think clearly. All you can do is shout his name and cling to the bedsheets as he wraps his arms around your thighs and holds them flush against his front. The angle makes you stutter, his tip touching somewhere sensitive that has your thighs squeezing closed. “P-please, harder. Use me.”
“Keep these fucking legs open.” Jimin growls, thrusting more harshly now. You attempt to follow his command and unclench your thighs, but they shake violently as soon as they part and it takes immense focus for you to hold them there. Looking up at your lover, you see the dark look that overtakes his features, dominance radiating off of him as he gets lost in you. You haven’t seen this look on him in a long while, but you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t sexy. He looks like he wants to eat you alive, devour you whole and leave not a morsel of you left until he’s had his fill.
Watching Jimin gain so much pleasure from you takes you to another level of bliss. His fingers dig into your thighs as he pounds his cock within your depths, determined to pull more desperate sounds from your throat, and his teeth bite down on his plush bottom lip in concentration. Sweat now trickles down his brow from the humid heat of the room, undoing the bath he took prior and replacing the soap with the scent of sex that leaks from his pores. This man is undeniably the hottest person you have ever laid eyes on and you can’t help but clench around him at the visuals he’s giving you.
Feeling you clench, Jimin moans, dragging his eyes up your figure until they land on your breasts. They jolt with every harsh thrust he gives you and dance flirtatiously in front of him— he can’t look away. Suddenly, he leans down and snatches up your hands, pinning them above your head with his fingers intertwined with yours, nearly drooling at how delectable you look under him. Your breasts certainly look different, the shape has become rounder and they jiggle slightly more than he can remember, but Jimin doesn’t think much of this as he focuses on delivering hard strokes. You shiver when his tongue licks a stripe up your damp neck, sucking a spot just below your ear before nibbling the lobe. He knows this is a weak spot for you, and just as he expected, your walls tighten around him once more. You push against him, trying to free your hands, but he has them locked sturdily in his grasp, silently forcing you to submit to him. You probably want to wind your fingers in his hair or grip onto his biceps, but he won’t give up an ounce of power at the moment. Not while he is ravaging you like this. So you settle for squeezing his hands and soaking in their warmth, gasping breathlessly as he takes you. You are entirely at his mercy and you absolutely love it.
One of his hands moves down to grip your thigh and push it open, unlocking you from where you have been clenched around his hips. Both of your wrists now held in one hand and still pinned against the sheets. The bed frame creaks noisily as he changes pace, abandoning his hard and fast thrusts for a slow and deep grind that has your eyes rolling to the back of your head. Something feels different about you, about the way you feel around him as the head of his cock licks at your cervix. It’s softer than usual and open for him, almost begging for his sperm, and he thinks this is the perfect time to get you pregnant. He aims to stay deep inside you. Each powerful movement is purposeful, everything down to the slight arch of his back that allows his pubic bone to grind into your clit, and you feel like you’re going crazy.
“Oh fuck, Jimin! I’m close again!” Your voice is strained in your throat and he smirks at the sound. He can feel it, the swell of your walls around him as you near your third high, and he swears it’s tighter than usual. Your muscles begin to tense up and push against him, preparing for your inevitable release. And just because you feel like pushing his buttons today, you allow your thighs to attempt to squeeze closed again.
“What did I say?!” The depth of his voice shocks you briefly and your eyes snap open to look at him. His jaw is tight as his stare bores into you with deadly intensity. “Keep your fucking legs open. Or do I have to hold them for you?” You let out a whimper, not daring to move your hands from their raised position when he drops your wrists to push open your other thigh, leaving you dripping and exposed in front of him. Your skin dimples where his fingertips dig into you— though he is careful not to bruise you— and he seems to hit even deeper like this. “You used to be so well behaved, My Queen. Are you acting out just to get a rise out of me?”
You dodge the question. “Please, Jimin, please make me cum again.” You can hardly hear anything aside from the slap of his balls against your ass and the squelch of his cock pushing through your warm walls.
“You think you deserve to cum? What will you do for it?” A dark chuckle leaves his throat when he sees you genuinely thinking of a response, biting so hard on your lip that he fears it might bleed.
“Anything.” You breathe. You’re unsure of how long you can hold back your orgasm, he feels so good fucking you like this, pushing his whole length into you without mercy.
“Anything, darling?” A lecherous grin plasters itself onto his mouth at your expression. “Hm, are you just saying that because you’re desperate? I can tell it feels good, you’re leaking all over me. Do you like it when I go deep like this?” You nod with a whine, eyelids pressed closed to hold back from cumming. “Open your eyes. Look at how deep I am inside you.” Peeling your eyes open, you peer down at yourself upon his command and see where his own eyes are glued. A small bulge presses against your lower abdomen every time he pushes in, disappearing when he pulls out only to reappear with the next thrust. Neither of you can take your eyes off of the sight, absolutely mesmerized by it.
“Please, I’m so close!” You groan loudly.
“You say you’ll do anything, my love?”
“Yes!”
“Will you be a good girl and let me put my baby in you? Let me cum right here against this fertile womb and get you pregnant with my baby?” The effect of his dirty talk is immediate and you clamp down on him, barely holding back as his hand rests over the bulge in your tummy, adding the tiniest amount of pressure to it.
“I will! Please!” Tears wet your doe eyes as you look up at him, digging your nails into the soft sheets above your head to keep from moving your arms from their position. He notes this with a hum, speeding up his hips in reward for your obedience.
“I know you will. Now cum.” On command, your body lets go of all the pent up pressure in your core, gripping onto his length with unbearable strength. Your walls pulsate with so much force that you nearly push him out, and when he finally pulls out of you, you squirt once again over the ledge of the bed. His hands on your legs do nothing to quell the wild tremors that overtake you and the streams of tears that flow over the apples of your cheeks. You are truly a sight to see, flushed red and glowing with the aftermath of yet another ferocious orgasm. Your sensitivity once again shocks him into silence. He didn’t even need to touch your clit for you to climax.
His stiff member bobs like a flagpole in the wind as he takes you in. It’s so hard that it stands straight up against his abdomen, jumping with its own pulse. When you open your eyes it is the first thing you see, and your body heats up again.
“Can you take any more, my love?” Jimin questions with concern, tracing his hands up your waist soothingly.
“Always. I can always take more of you.” Despite the screaming in your limbs, you sit up abruptly and pull him down to the bed, rolling the two of you over as you lock lips. Jimin seems surprised but not opposed to the shift in power dynamics, sensing that you want to take the reins for now. Your fingers wrap around his base and line him up with your slit, showing not even a moment’s hesitation before dropping down and knocking the wind out of both of you.
“You do not have to-“
“No, Jimin, I want to. I am supposed to be treating you after all, let me make you feel good.”
Fuck, you’re hot. Not only do you look amazing on top of him, but your pussy feels much hotter than usual. And it’s so tight, as if it’s greedy for every inch of him and eager to suck out his release. He won’t last long like this, that is for certain. His hands support you as you shift into a squat above him— and maybe it’s the novelty of the position, but he swears it’s never felt this good before.
“I imagined this so many times, but I never thought I’d actually get to see you riding me like this.” He confesses in a strained breath. You press your palms into his chest to lift yourself up, lowering yourself experimentally before repeating the action with less restraint.
“Am I living up to your expectations?” It could just be the angle, but his cock feels unbelievably deep inside you, and you half expect it to hurt yet you feel no pain. There is not even the slightest bit of discomfort as he nudges at your womb and you attribute this to the three incredible orgasms you have already reached tonight.
“God, yes.” He can’t look away from where you impale yourself on him, your shaky legs spread wide to let him see every second of the erotic display. From the way you grip him every time you lift up, to the strings of your arousal and cum that weave a sticky web between your ass and his pelvis, and even to the way your clit swallows in delight, he almost goes lightheaded as he takes it all in. His throat bobs as he gulps, back arching off the sheets under your warm hands.
“Faster?”
You don’t wait for a response before you start speeding up. He’s close, you can feel it in the way he swells against your walls and see it in the way his neck and chest color that pretty pink color you adore so much. Your limbs are aching for relief and it takes all of your remaining energy to keep up your efforts, but you wouldn’t dream of stopping. No, you are determined to bring Jimin to his end no matter what. The high pitched moans he lets out for your ears only are more than enough motivation to keep going, but you are working for a prize much more valuable that the lovely sounds he makes for you. You want his cum. You want it so badly that it is the only thing you can think of, so despite the pain in your fragile legs as you bounce yourself as hard and fast as you can, you continue for him. You’ve never been afraid to put in a little effort, and this is something you are willing to work for.
“(Y/n), I’m gonna cum!” Jimin’s dialect shines through strongly as he grits his teeth through the pleasure you bombard him with. You know it must feel different for him, the pleasure is always so much more intense when you aren’t the one doing all the work, and this is the first time you’ve pinned him down like this. It’s the first time you’ve dropped yourself down to clamp your knees on either side of him and wrap yourself around his upper body as you pant into his neck, leaving sloppy kisses and coaxing him toward his high with whispered words. Now that the roles are reversed, you can see just how wrecked he is for you— the usually composed king now lies spread in a heap of matted hair, sweaty skin, and bitten lips, completely speechless and grasping onto your thighs in a desperate bid to hold onto his sanity. “Please, I- I-“
“Cum for me, My King,” You are sure your body has just about reached its limit, but you feel no pain or fatigue when you look into your lover’s eyes and find an unraveled man. “I promised I would take your cum and let you get me pregnant. Give it all to me, my love, I want it. Cum inside me, Jimin.”
Bucking his hips, Jimin loses all control and throws his head back in anticipation as he aids your movements with his strong arms. When he feels your lips on his chin, he leans forward and allows you to swallow his groans of pleasure, both of you starved for breath but unwilling to pull away from the kiss. Everything you have done for him tonight— wearing sexy lingerie, getting on your knees to please him, squirting not once but twice— culminates into this one moment and he doesn’t think he can take take it. It’s all too much. With three sharp thrusts from both of you, he climaxes with a shout, lifting you up along with him as his hips rise off the bed.
“Oh fuck!” Maybe you shouldn’t feel this way, but you giggle giddily at the state of rapture he’s in because of you. The veins in his neck pop out of his skin as he dumps spurt after spurt of his semen into you, and you think this is the biggest load he’s ever given you. It takes a long time for him to come down from his high and for a moment you wonder if he will be okay with the way he twitches and shivers as your hips roll to a stop.
He doesn’t seem to mind your weight resting on top of him, nor does he react to the light kisses you press to his drenched skin. He does, however, wrap his arms securely around you when you shift to roll off of him, holding you on top of his body until you both have caught your breath and can open your heavy eyelids enough to look at each other with tired smiles.
“I love you.” You grin, running your digits through his disheveled mop of hair.
“I love you more, My Queen.” He pulls you down for another kiss to silence whatever rebuttal you surely have prepared at the tip of your tongue because he knows what you will say. And the thought makes his heart swell.
It seems like hours pass before both of you can work up the strength to part from each other. You have to be carried to the bathroom because your limbs feel far too weak and Jimin is not yet willing to let you go from his embrace. He is mindful of the puddle that you left on the floor as he carries you to the bath, and both of you sink into the depths together to wash away all your sins. You stay like that until your toes are pruned and the water is slightly cooler than lukewarm, the time flying by as you talk freely about everything you can think of: your hopes for your future family, your day with Jackson and Lena, gossip about Lilian and her whereabouts— she has not yet returned to the lodge even at this late hour and you hope that she is safe, but more importantly, you hope that her night with that handsome male servant ends similarly to yours. She could afford to take tonight and tomorrow off to unwind a bit, you feel a tad guilty that her needs may be neglected in the kingdom as she tends to you nonstop in the castle. Sleep finds you both easily and you cannot drop the smile from your cheeks as you cuddle up with the man you love.
This afternoon would have been perfect if not for the way you were feeling. Sparse clouds float through the sunny blue sky, the mountains surrounding you blossoming with vibrancy, but the beautiful scenery is dulled in your bleary eyesight. The lightheadedness you’d felt upon arrival two days ago has returned, along with a pounding headache that dampens your mood.
Jimin and Jackson walk ahead of their queens, talking casually as though they had been friends for years. The sight makes your heart grow warm and you use it to distract you from your discomfort as you walk along the outside pathways to a different section of the enormous castle. Lena notices the shift in your demeanor fairly quickly, commenting that you look less energized than yesterday.
“Did you not sleep well last night?” She implores, her brow creased with worry.
“I had a very restful sleep last night, but it feels like my body is dragging behind.” You try to keep yourself from rubbing at your face. Royals are not supposed to show weakness and vulnerability in public, and even though you are only surrounded by Kyungsoo and a few of Lena’s servants, you wish to uphold your appearances. “I do not feel sick, however, so I do not think it is caused by illness.”
“Would there be any other reason for you to feel fatigued? We did spend quite a considerable amount of time in the heat yesterday.”
“Well,” The guards and servants lag behind you far enough for them not to hear your conversation, but you still lower your voice in modesty. “Jimin and I were intimate late into the evening...” You figure your late night activities are also the reason for the tenderness you feel in your breasts, your tight undergarments causing slight pain as they bind your chest.
“Ah, I see!” She beams back at you, giggling. “You were not used to such strenuous exercise. I have experience with that— one time Jackson kept me in bed for so long that I nearly fainted from dehydration! Jimin seems like he would have a lot of stamina, be careful with that one.” The wiggle of her eyebrows lifts your spirits a bit. Speaking of such lewd subjects is seen as unladylike, especially for royalty, but you find yourself uncaring of that when you are with Lena. You have never had a woman of your same age and status to converse with before, no one could ever relate or felt comfortable enough to speak freely with you. This closeness you have with her is a novel feeling— and it is likely that Jimin feels the same with Jackson.
“I’ll be sure to be mindful of that.” You smile, staring at the back of his head. Your husband turns to look at you when he feels your eyes as he passively listens to the other King recall a story, sending a wink your way before returning his attention to the man beside him.
“Is there any other possible explanation for your symptoms?” Redirecting your gaze to Lena, you catch how her eyes flicker down to your stomach, a small smile on her lips. As soon as you realize her meaning, you stiffen, legs nearly bringing you to a halt.
“No,” Your eyes fall to the ground. “I... do not think it is pregnancy. Before I departed from home I was examined by my doctor and she-“ You sigh. “I am not pregnant.”
“Hmm. Well, I have been pregnant 4 times and have experienced many symptoms with each of my children. What you described to me sounds familiar. Do not dismiss the idea just yet, (Y/n).”
Before you can even open your mouth to form a reply, you are hit with a wave of dizziness that makes the world spin. Kyungsoo is by your side in an instant, stabilizing you as someone asks if you are alright. You are led to a nearby bench where all of the servants crowd around you, Jimin rushing over when he hears the commotion.
“(Y/n)?! What’s the matter?” The world spins a little less when your eyes are closed, so you do not look up at him, but you can imagine the almost sickly worry covering his lovely face. You know he has been especially traumatized by the events of your wedding and you never want to put him in a situation like that again, but you can’t help the way your body feels. Distantly, you hear Jackson order a servant to get the doctor, footsteps skittering away as he comes to squat down in front of you.
“Are you ill?” Jackson’s voice calms the anxiety you weren’t aware you were feeling. It is frightening not knowing what’s going on with your own body. Lena’s words ring in your mind.
“N-no, it is just the altitude. I just need to rest for a minute.” Your excuse is almost convincing, but no one moves— except for Jimin, who moves closer to you on the bench to support your back. After a few minutes, your head begins to clear, though your vision remains blurry. Eyes silently peer at you from all sides and you can feel them hot on your skin, embarrassment now the prominent emotion you feel. “Please do not worry about me, I am fine, really.”
“Are you certain? We can rest here for a little while longer.” Jimin suggests gently, but for some reason this irritates you.
“I said I’m fine.” You snap, earning an even more concerned look from him. Just then, the doctor approaches, slightly out of breath and sweating. “I don’t need a doctor! I’m feeling better already. Look.” You no longer feel dizzy anymore so you attempt to stand, rising quickly from the seat to come face to face with Jackson as he rises as well. Jimin still has his arm around you, both men watching you closely. “See?” But as soon as you’re stable on your feet, the spinning returns as if on cue and you come toppling forward into Jackson’s arms, everything going black.
“You don’t need to do this, Jackson, I told you I feel okay now.” You grumble as he carries you to the infirmary inside the castle. He took you into his arms without hesitation when you fell, offering to carry you because Jimin was rapidly descending into distress. While you were only out for about 2 minutes before you regained consciousness, everyone had reacted as if you were dying.
Looking at your husband now, you can see how unnerved he has become. Because he is a General who has seen many battles, he has trained himself not to react emotionally in stressful situations— but you can read the look in his eyes as clear as day as he walks alongside you, watching you more closely than what is in front of him.
“That is what you said earlier, and then you fainted immediately afterwards. Do not worry, I don’t mind carrying you. I needed a little exercise today anyway.” Always a jokester, you crack a smile at his comment, rolling your eyes as the doctor leads him into a room to rest you on the bed. The doctor works quickly, taking a blood sample from you and leaving for the lab, having already taken your vitals when you initially passed out. “We’ll be waiting outside.” With that, Jackson takes Lena’s shaky hand and exits the room, leaving you in bed and Jimin hovering over you awkwardly.
“Please sit down, you are making me nervous.” You breathe. He blinks and nods absently, perching himself on the edge of the bed next to you. “Are you okay?”
“I should be asking you that.” He laughs dryly. Jimin bites his lip when you give him a sympathetic gaze and take his hand. Your words from the argument you had nearly a month ago echo in his head. This is a chance for him to open up to you about his emotions and seek your comfort, your expression shows that you are expecting it of him, so he takes a deep breath. There’s no use hiding his emotions from you. “Truth be told, I am a wreck. You fainting brought back some rather unpleasant memories.” He confesses.
“I’m sorry.” You really are apologetic, stressing him out is the last thing you ever wanted to do.
“It is not your fault. I just worry about you so much. I cannot bear to lose you, my love, and I feel so helpless when things like this happen, it feels like I always have to wait for others to come to rescue you.”
“Would you like to become a doctor so you are more prepared, then?” He wasn’t expecting that response and snaps his head up to look at you when you laugh. “You cannot control everything that happens to me, Jimin. It is okay to let others help. All I need is for you to stay by my side, your presence is more than enough.” He nods at this, accepting the kiss you plant on his cheek and squeezing your hands.
Long seconds of silence pass as you wait for the doctor to return. Then, a sudden thought pops into your mind that makes you groan aloud.
“Lilian is going to be pissed at me.” You can’t help but chuckle at the circumstances.
“Why is that?”
“I told her to take off today and enjoy her time here, but she was worried about me so she initially refused. I assured her of my health this morning before we left. I can only imagine to look on her face once she finds out what happened.” You do feel a bit bad, Lilian knows you better than anyone and it is clear that she could tell something was off, but you convinced her that her instincts were wrong and now you find yourself in the infirmary. She will surely put herself down over this incident because of her absence when you most needed her.
“You can worry about her after we confirm that you are okay. For now, let us focus on this.” Just then, the doctor enters the room again, coming to stand at the bottom of the bed as you and Jimin look up at them with expectant eyes. Your heart pounds in your chest. You’ve become so used to hearing bad news from doctors, you are almost conditioned to be nervous and guarded around them.
“(Y/n), I have determined the cause of your sudden collapse.” Jimin squeezes your hand tighter and you can feel the sweat on his fingertips. “It appears that you are pregnant! Congratulations! The blood tests showed high levels of-“
“Pardon?” You interject with a raspy voice. Your brain is having a hard time processing the words and you blink slowly for a few seconds, unaware of Jimin’s shell shocked expression. “I- H-how can this be? My physician tested me right before I left and she said I was not pregnant.”
“Well, it is entirely possible to get false negative results, especially when it is early in the pregnancy. I don’t think it reflects poorly on your physician, these things just happen sometimes and are completely out of our control. But looking at my test results and the symptoms you have been experiencing, I am certain that you are about 6 weeks pregnant.”
“B-but I bled last month.”
“For how many days?”
“One or two...”
“Then that was likely implantation bleeding, which is to be expected. Dizziness and even fainting are also fairly common symptoms, so there is no particular need to worry about today’s incident— though I recommend that you make sure to get adequate rest and nutrition to avoid complications in the future. Once again, congratulations.”
Finally, you drag your gaze over to your husband who has been silent since the doctor appeared, and his eyes are filled to the brim with tears when they connect with yours.
“You- (Y/n), you’re finally pregnant!” He whispers, and the way his voice cracks causes the dam to break within yourself and all of your emotions come flooding out. Before you know it you’re wrapped in his embrace, both of you simultaneously sobbing and laughing into each other’s necks from pure joy and surprise as the doctor excuses themselves from the room. It is like all of the building frustration from the past several months has been crushing you slowly and now that weight has been lifted, allowing you to breathe freely for the first time. Jimin feels similarly. He has been holding back so many of his emotions since you first started trying to get pregnant and that has taken a tremendous toll on his mind and body, but for the first time, he can finally release those emotions and let himself feel the heaviness of it all. He is crying harder than you are, soaking the top of your dress as you cradle his head to you and hold him there. His hands ghost over your waist and lower abdomen so delicately, as if protecting the growing life inside of you.
When you’ve both gotten yourselves together enough to allow Jackson and Lena to visit, they rush in without hesitation.
“Is everything okay?” Lena is by your side first, immediately noticing your red and puffy eyes. You’re a little bit hesitant to tell her because you know she’ll gloat about her “sixth sense”.
“Yes, I’m alright. We just found out that I am pregnant.” The room erupts into noise, the two of them sounding like an entire circus as Jackson nearly jumps on Jimin in a bear hug and Lena squeals excitedly beside you.
“I knew it! You dismissed me so offhandedly and it turns out that I was right! I have a sixth sense for these things, you know; you should trust me more often.” Just as expected.
“And here you were, just telling me how worried you were about not yet yielding an heir to the throne,” Jackson throws a heavy arm over Jimin’s shoulder. “I suppose we should celebrate before you depart in the morning. I will throw a lovely ball tonight in your honor!”
“Oh, I must oversee the preparations then! Get some rest, (Y/n), and congratulations again!” And just like that, the couple is gone, rushing back out of the room and leaving you and your husband giggling.
“I am sorry, Lilian.” You apologize for what feels like the thousandth time. She continues to pout as she helps load your belongings into the carriage, barely sparing you a glance.
“I knew I should have stayed; I had a feeling something would happen.” She turns to scowl, not necessarily at you but it is in your direction. “I cannot believe I missed such a huge announcement as well! Both Jackson and Lena found out before me, this is so unfair.”
“You sound like a child,” You snicker, taking Kyungsoo’s hand as he helps you into the carriage behind Jimin.
“Yes, well I think I am allowed to throw a tantrum just this once.” You catch Kyungsoo crack a grin at her, the first time you’ve seen any emotion from him, and it brings a smile to your own face.
“If it makes you feel any better, Kyungsoo found out after Jackson and Lena, too.” Jimin comments, taking your hand and pulling you into his side.
“It does not make me feel better because he still found out before me!”
The sun is still low in the sky but slowly rises as you depart from the kingdom. Once you return to the castle, there are many duties that you must take care of, and many traditional processes you will have to go through now that you are pregnant— you are carrying a possible future heir to the throne after all. But you have never been happier. For now it still feels surreal, even though you have waited nearly a year for this moment, but as soon as the people of your kingdom come to greet you and celebrate the news of your conception, the reality of the situation will hit and you are sure you will be overwhelmed with new challenges. Pregnancy is not an easy thing, but at least you will have Jimin with you to help you through it all, just as he has always done. You rest your head on his shoulder with a mischievous grin.
“So Lilian, how was your date the other night? You seemed rather cozy with that young man at the ball yesterday evening.”
“It was not a date!”
#tyfys#jimin smut#ksmutclub#btscreatorscorner#clubjimin#ficswithluv#Jimin angst#jimin fluff#bts royal au#purplearmynet
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Dystopia pt 8 (FINALE)
Summary: You were an Amity born. You were taught to value kindness and harmony. But you also valued bravery and knowledge. After the test to see which faction best suited you, you were given the choice to either stay in your faction or leave. When you chose to leave your faction for another, your whole life changed and you wondered if it was the right decision. You pondered over it at first, all until you met him.
Theme: Divergent au, strangers to lovers
Genre: mild action [I tried], angst, fluff, slowburn
Warnings: mentions of blood and violence
WC: 3.6k
Pairing: Trainer!Jungkook x Initiate!FemReader
Tips: In this whole series, Y/N is a few years younger than JK. Those who were initiates like Y/N that just ended the Choosing Ceremony, are all the same age. None of these characters portray who the mentioned people are in real life whatsoever! It's just a fictional character!
a/n: Hello! Guess what? You made it to the end! I know this is a short series but I'm more than thankful if you have made it this far. Although it's quite short for a finale, I hope I didn't disappoint you too much! But anyways, here's the final part for this series :) Enjoyyy
~~~
With hurried steps, all three of them quickly hollered their way through the facility in hopes that they would reach the dorms in time. Jungkook’s heart was beating so fast against his chest, unsure if he could even calm himself down knowing something bad had happened to you. That was the last thing he wanted. From the day he saw you a few weeks back, he knew he would like you.
He knew there was something about you that leaves him being all clammy and nervous despite his amazing skill at hiding his emotions. Jungkook never knew he would manage to get close to you, thinking it was impossible considering he was a trainer and you were an initiate.
However, it looks like fate has a different plan for you and him when he saw you training by yourself in the middle of the night. That was when he first got to have a close interaction with you.
Even though it was just him teaching you basic tips on how to improve your skills for each of the different skill sets, he still got to talk to you and also earn your trust after a while. And as the days gradually went by, it was needless to say that Jungkook had grown so fond of you and even had a crush on you.
Yes, a Dauntless Trainer having a crush on a Dauntless Initiate.
How cute.
Ultimately, it all goes downhill for him as he finally arrives at the shared dormitory, only to find the rest of the initiates crowding around at one spot. The minute Jungkook and Changkyun pushed through the crowd, their hearts stopped for a millisecond upon seeing what the fuss was about.
There you were, cradled in Hyunjae’s arms as Gahyeon was crying with her hands desperately pressing what looks to be a completely blood soaked towel against your throat.
Your throat has been slit, not too deep to kill you but just enough to render you voiceless.
You were just turning around on your bed when you peeked your eyes open out of instinct, feeling as though you were being watched. Except, you weren’t expecting for it to be legit. Because the minute you opened your eyes, there was a hooded figure looming over you with a hand raised to their head level with what looks to be a knife from the Training Room.
Fuck!
Before your mind could react, your body seemed to move faster as your arms swiveled to a cross position over your face right when the person launched his attack to your head.
With the tip of its blade just barely missing your right eye socket.
You used all your energy to shove their hand away using your arms, only to kick their stomach harshly. They stumbled back a little before lunging back at you. However, you quickly rolled out of bed to your left, falling to the ground with a soft thud just as they plunged the blade into the mattress right where your chest would’ve been.
You rushed to your feet, making a break for it to the open toilet but your steps faltered when you felt a sharp stab to your calf.
“Ah! Fuck!” You loudly hissed to yourself.
The blade got pulled out of your leg harshly, only for you to flip around on the ground.
The person kneeled over you as they tried to stab you in the face again but you managed to grab their wrist with both hands. They were strong. A little too strong if you say so yourself. However, for some reason, you felt like you knew this person.
You were struggling. You were struggling hard to push their hand away. Mustering whatever strength you had left, you used all your power to push them back.
For a moment, you were glad that they nearly fell off you.
However, you weren’t mentally and physically ready for what he was about to do next. And that was for him to make one swift swing of his arm. It all happened so fast, you didn’t even realize what he did until you felt something wet trickle down your neck. You tried to curse at them but instead you were shocked when nothing came out of your mouth.
That wasn’t until one of your hands reached up for your throat and you felt it.
The open slit, the feeling of wet liquid, your nostrils filling with the strong smell of copper, and finally, bringing your fingers up to see your fingers coated in your own red crimson blood.
Your mouth hung agape as you tried to speak but there was nothing. Tears welled up in your eyes as the person got up and smirked down at you.
“Goodnight loser. I hope you rot in hell.”
They soon took off running, leaving you there helpless with no voice to scream for help, to tell people who did it. But of course, you weren’t stupid. Despite the lack of light, only an idiot couldn’t catch on easily. For there is only one person who calls you ‘Loser’ right from the start. Your doubts were confirmed the minute that nickname left their lips.
Dumb move Yeonjun.
Since you couldn’t scream for help, you slowly began to drag yourself across the room, leaving a long trail of blood behind your leg where you got stabbed only to reach the end of Gahyeon’s bed.
With one swift grasp, you managed to hold onto her shirt and that was enough to wake her.
It took her a second to realize what happened until she saw the trail of blood on the floor and your bleeding throat that you were desperately putting pressure on. She let out a shrilling scream before yelling for help from the others. Everyone began to panic at the gruesome scene, making Hyunjae cradle you while Yunho rushed out to get help.
Jungkook carried you to the hospital wing, with Gahyeon, Hyunjae, Yunho and Changkyun tagging along. One of the nurses inspected your injury, seeing that you’ve lost quite a bit of blood. She mentioned that they had to give you some blood in order to save you and they have to be the same blood type as yours. After much inspection, it was clear that only Jungkook and Hyunjae shared the same blood type as you.
Both of them offered to donate some of their blood to you to save your life. While the two were being drawn of their blood, Changkyun went ahead and brought the other two back to their dormitory to rest. You were already laying there on the medical bed unconscious which means you couldn’t feel the way Gahyeon gently gave your blood coated hands a small squeeze.
“Please be okay, Y/N.” She whispered as a tear rolled down her cheek. Yunho comforted the girl before they both left with Changkyun.
A few minutes later, the nurse managed to collect as much blood as you probably needed after losing them quite a bit. She placed a bandaid over the spots where she injected the tube in their arms. After she was done, she dismissed the two boys but Jungkook asked if he could stay.
She nodded, setting up the equipment so that the blood she collected from the two gentlemen could be transferred into your body through the IV in your hand.
Hyunjae left after caressing the top of your head, wishing you a speedy recovery.
The nurse went ahead and disinfected your wounds before suturing the open cuts and wrapping them with bandages. Once she was done, she excused herself, leaving you alone with Jungkook as the male went over to scoot his chair closer to your side. Jungkook carefully reaches for your hand that didn’t have the needle attached. He brings it up to his lips, kissing your knuckles softly.
“I’m so sorry… I’m so sorry I couldn’t protect you. I’m sorry this happened to you Y/N. You truly don’t deserve this…” Jungkook whispered as he stood up to plant a gentle kiss on your forehead.
He felt sorry. He felt sick. He felt confused. But more importantly, he felt furious at whoever did this to you. Of course he didn’t know who but you knew.
You woke up to a sharp pain in your throat, feeling it get itchy like an unusual sore throat. The prickling pain in your right calf made your leg jolt as you shot your tired eyes open. The morning sun filled the room. You carefully looked around to find you alone in the room which looks to be the hospital wing.
Memories from last night suddenly came flashing into your mind like a tsunami, and yet, you still couldn’t wrap your mind around it.
Did that really happen?
Was it all a dream?
You almost didn’t want to believe it until your hands reached up to your throat and you felt the soft material of the bandage taped onto your neck. Of course, your stubbornness was trying to make you think otherwise so you opened your mouth to speak.
Truth be told, nothing comes out of your mouth. Absolutely nothing. Not even a sound.
Your thoughts were swirling, a million things running across your head at that very moment. From the incident last night to the final evaluation test you were supposed to have today. The test was supposed to determine your final results of your initiation. It was supposed to determine whether you get to stay in Dauntless or you get kicked out and become Factionless.
Of course, there are two ways of getting that second option. First is by failing Stage 3, and second is of course by not attending the final test at all.
How wonderful.
As your mind was swirling with these complications, you completely missed the figure that was making their way to you. It wasn’t until they were a few feet from you that you looked up only to lock eyes with Jungkook.
Immediately, a whole swarm of emotions came rushing through you as you began to cry. Jungkook rushed over to you, only to hush you.
“Shh… Shh… Don’t cry. It’s okay. I’m here. You’re fine. I’m here.” Jungkook cooed as he held you in his arms, feeling the way your arms wrapped around his waist tightly like you were afraid he might disappear if you let go. His heart swelled upon feeling his shirt get soaked from your tears.
Your silent cries only made his heart drop even more. Jungkook caressed the back of your head lovingly, making sure to give you small reassuring kisses to the side of your head as a way to hopefully calm you down.
You both stayed like that for a bit before he sang you a sweet song in your ear.
Jungkook felt your body relax in his touch, happy that his singing made you calmer. After a while, he pulled away slowly to look you in the eye. How is it possible that you are just sitting there crying your eyes out and yet you still looked beautiful? Or maybe it’s just him.
Who knows.
Nevertheless, he wipes your tears with his thumbs and soon smiles down at you.
“You’re so strong. You’re a strong girl Y/N. And I really admire you for that.” He whispered. You couldn’t help but crack a tiny smile when you felt him boop your nose with his own. You had so much to say to him. So much you wanted to share with him. Unfortunately, luck wasn’t on your side today. Just then, Jungkook’s smile faltered and it made you curious.
You reached for his wrist where his hand was just cupping your face softly, to catch his attention. You silently asked him what’s wrong through your worried eyes, hoping he could read your mind.
Thankfully, he did.
“The final stage… It starts in 5 minutes. I talked to the leaders about your current condition. I tried my best to change their mind, Changkyun did try too… Unfortunately, the leaders made an agreement to… disqualify you, which means… y-you…” Jungkook paused as he struggled to convey the message to you but you already knew what it meant.
You violently shook your head at him. You had to redeem yourself. You didn’t plan for this to happen. You were forced to be in this damn medical bed out of your own will. Oh if only they saw who did this to you, would they gladly throw him to the Factionless.
“Decision has been made. Since you can’t physically be there, you’re immediately disqualified.” Jungkook said as you shook your head again. There must be something about the way you were staring at him because at that very moment, it was as though you sent him a message through telepathy.
“Wait a minute… For the final test, you don’t need to talk. You… just need to be physically there for the simulation.” Jungkook said in realization as your eyes lit up.
“Does that mean… she’s immediately disqualified?” Gahyeon asked sadly, only for Hyunjae to nod.
“I mean, technically according to the rules, you are supposed to be here physically for the final test… So, I guess that’s true then…” Hyunjae said.
The rest of them who were gathered by the side of the hall where the final stage would take place, shared mostly the same emotions about you not being able to join them which would render you as Factionless by default even after all your hard work.
However, it looks like someone couldn’t care less about you not making it.
“Who cares? She doesn't belong in Dauntless anyway.” Yeonjun rolls his eyes as he walks to the front, leaning against one of the pillars. Your friends exchanged a few glances to one another, not feeling good about the way he said that. A few minutes passed, and they had just finished the test with the third person on the list. All the initiates were anxious as they waited for their turn. Soon enough, the Dauntless leader calls out the next name to be on stage.
“Y/F/N.”
With that, the room fell silent as the initiates looked at each other with deep frowns on their faces. A few beats of silences went by, not a single sign of you anywhere. Meanwhile, Yeonjun had that devilish smirk on his face as he felt satisfied with your lack of presence.
Unfortunately, just as the leader was about to call out the next person on the list, Jungkook’s voice echoed around the hall from the opposite end of where the initiates were gathered. That’s when Jungkook emerged through the double doors with you beside him.
He had one arm wrapped around your waist as you limped your way to the platform where the chair was waiting for you. Your friends cheered for your arrival as they shouted a string of goodlucks to you. Yeonjun growled, totally not expecting to find you still alive.
Maybe he didn’t cut you deep enough.
You immediately recognized the lady who was prepping the tools to put you into simulation, to be the same lady you met on your Initiation test.
After you sat down, Jungkook gave your waist a little squeeze before he smiled down at you and whispered, “Goodluck.”
He soon left your side as the lady asked you if you were ready. You gave her a small nod, letting her inject the needle into your neck right below your ear.
Once the serum had been injected into your system, it took effect right away, bringing you to your first simulation. It was the same simulations you went through during your Stage 2. They were all of your fears connecting one simulation to the other. You managed to remember what Jungkook taught you during the past few weeks and how to properly handle each situation like a fellow Dauntless.
The minute your last simulation ended, you woke up calmly only for the lady to smile.
“You did well.” She complimented you as she helped you sit up. Jungkook came to your side and very gently led you off the platform.
“Good job. Looks like my tips worked huh?” Jungkook asked, to which you smiled, feeling shy all of a sudden. He guided you to the side only for your friends to rush over to you.
“Sweetie! You’re okay! How are you?” Gahyeon asked as she hugged you, making you return her hug. You showed an ‘okay’ sign with your hand before Yunho ruffled your hair. “Of course you are, you’re a beast Y/N.” His comment made some of them laugh, including you. Just then, your eyes drifted to your left only to meet Yeonjun’s fiery eyes.
All you wanted to do was throw him in The Pit. The last thing you wanted was to see his competitive ass everyday from now on.
However, you weren’t going to kill him despite all the pain he’s caused you.
After letting you meet up with your friends, Jungkook brought you back to his penthouse to let you rest. He carefully laid you down on his bed, pulling his blanket up to your chest while you snuggled into his side with your head resting on his chest. Jungkook chuckled as he caressed your hair, tucking them behind your ear, making sure to let his fingers softly trace the side of your face as he did so.
“No matter what the results are, I’m never leaving your side. That, I can promise you.” Jungkook said softly as you tilted your head up to look at him. You wished you could speak. You wished you could verbally say this to him outloud. Unfortunately you couldn’t.
In the end, you opted for the saying ‘Actions speak louder than words’ and so, with that being said, you lifted your head up and used your left elbow to prop your body up on the mattress.
Jungkook watched you carefully as you slowly leaned in only to press your lips softly on his. Almost instantly, he wrapped one arm around your waist while the other allowed his fingers to tangle into your soft locks. You reached a hand up to cup his cheek, letting your thumb trace the scar he had on his left cheekbone. You felt him smile against your lips as he pulled away for a breath.
His eyes fluttered open to find your cute ones staring back at him. Jungkook couldn’t help but chuckle as he gently massaged your scalp in a calming manner.
“If that is your way of telling me what I think it is, then I’ll be the one to confirm verbally that I feel the same way too…” Jungkook’s voice was smooth and sultry in your ears, it almost made you melt into a puddle. Almost.
So with one more kiss from him, your heart raced in your chest as he pulled away to let his lips hover over yours before he said the words you’ve been meaning to tell him.
“I love you Y/N.”
Prologue
6 months had passed, you ended up staying in Dauntless together with Gahyeon, Hyunjae and Yunho. Right after the final stage, you gave Jungkook the weapon Yeonjun used to attack you the night before the final stage. After investigating the weapon and finding evidence that confirms Yeonjun was indeed the attacker, he was immediately thrown out of Dauntless. Rendering him Factionless.
Yes, that jerk deserved it.
Yunho was given the role of a guard due to his unfortunate ranking but hey, at least he wasn’t Factionless.
Gahyeon was a trainer for Dauntless-born initiates while you and Hyunjae were trainers for faction transfers. Although, you only started becoming one after the 3rd month when you were starting to be able to talk again.
And how was your relationship with Jungkook, might I ask?
Well, just splendid.
Your relationship with him only grew stronger each day as he took care of you during the first few months when you still had difficulties to talk. He was always there for you when you needed someone to back you up in heated arguments.
Jungkook took you to visit your parents the day after the final stage. No doubt your parents got upset over what happened to their daughter, they were more than thankful that you were still alive and that Jungkook was there to keep you sane. As the months go by, Jungkook’s feelings for you bloomed.
Today was another day of training for you and your initiates where you managed to guide the new initiates along with Hyunjae’s help.
You were just standing off to the side, letting Hyunjae take over for the knife throwing session when you suddenly felt a pair of strong arms wrapping itself around your waist. You giggled as you turned your head to find Jungkook’s face just mere inches away from yours.
“Not here, love… We’re in the middle of training.” You whispered, earning a soft chuckle from him before he peppered your cheek with kisses.
“Can’t I just give my beautiful girlfriend some loving kisses before I go to my meeting?” Jungkook teased, making you giggle.
“Aren’t you being needy?” You laughed.
“Only when I miss you…”
“We literally saw each other an hour ago, Kook.”
“I know.” Jungkook grinned cutely at you only for you to push his face away gently while you laughed.
“Hmm, needy indeed.”
“Hey…” He pouted at you. Of course your heart couldn’t bear to see his sad pout so you turned to face him completely. Reaching up with both hands to hold his face, you pressed your lips on his before pulling away to see his silly smile on his face.
“I love you.” You whispered as you felt him hug you.
“I love you more.”
That was the last thing you heard as Changkyun’s voice beckons your boyfriend over from a few feet behind Jungkook. “Come on lovebird, we gotta go… See you later Y/N.” Changkyun chuckled as he wiggled his index finger towards Jungkook. Your boyfriend gives you one last kiss before he jogs over to his older friend.
Maybe joining Dauntless wasn’t as bad as you thought after all.
~~~
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a/n: Thank you for reading this series! Do check out my other fics if you're interested to read more of my writings! ❤️
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Suicidal Misunderstanding Part VI - Star Wars Time Travel AU
Part I - - - - - Part II - - - - - Part III - - - - - Part IV - - - - - Part V
Anakin watched Obi-Wan through the stalks for several minutes. He could see him kneeling at the base of the waterfall, occasionally glancing around, as if searching for someone. Just when he was about to break and interrupt him, Obi-Wan stood and walked over. They sat together on the low bench, surrounded by the carefully cultivated colored fungi.
“Obi-Wan...maybe we should talk about what’s going on with you. Whatever it is, I’m here for you.” Anakin offered hesitantly.
Obi-Wan tensed, hands clenching in his lap.
“No.”
“Master Windu and Bant both seemed to think this isn’t a drug thing. Please, let-”
“That wasn’t what I was saying no to.”
Obi-Wan stood and began threading a path through the mushrooms, careful not to step on any of the smaller ones. Anakin was forced to follow directly in his footsteps, not wanting to risk damaging something Obi-Wan clearly seemed to care about, but wishing he could look at his Master’s face.
“Did I ever tell you about Bruck Chun?” Obi-Wan asked.
“No. Who’s Bruck?” Anakin responded with deliberate patience.
“He was an old crechemate of mine, quite gifted, though he had a temper. There have been times you remind me of him. We were rivals.” They were approaching the end of the alcove, a large stone overhang throwing them in to shadow.
“Were?”
“He died. When we were twelve.”
When they reached the rock face, Obi-Wan started climbing straight up. Anakin followed. Several clicks above the floor, Obi-Wan squeezed his way into a narrow crack, invisible from the floor below. Anakin followed. They awkwardly shuffled along the passage until Obi-Wan suddenly dropped out of sight. Anakin followed.
They landed in a hidden alcove. It was half lit by sunlight filtering in from cracks above, and half lit by the glow of mushrooms and crystals tenaciously embedded in the rock face around.
“Oh.” Anakin said softly. “Is this where you go when you visit the fountains to meditate?”
“No, I hadn’t been here in years.” Obi-Wan answered wistfully. “I started getting too big, didn’t want to damage the passageway too much. I figured some other younglings would stumble upon it someday like I did. I’m sorry. I avoided this room for the first year or two of your padawanship. By the time I even thought to share it, you had already grown so big...”
He sat down, legs stretched out in front. Anakin sat next to him, mirroring his position.
“I’m glad you’re sharing it with me now.” Anakin smiled reassuringly, but Obi-Wan was staring ahead blankly.
The young knight swallowed nervously. “Did you...come here with Bruck?”
Obi-Wan let out a snort. “Gods, no! I hid here from him. Before we were rivals, he bullied me relentlessly.”
“And...this is the guy you said I remind you of?” Was he being insulted?
“At times. Math lessons, saber practice, none of that ever came easy to me. But you and him...you never even needed to study. And you do have a vicious streak, Anakin.”
Rather than try to argue in vain against the slight hurt, Anakin just asked, “How did he die?”
Obi-Wan closed his eyes. “He fell.”
Anakin jerked in surprise, “Wait, you mean-”
“We were fighting at the top of the waterfall- it- he had nearly killed Bant. He was angry that we both had been chosen by Masters, and Xanatos used that to manipulate him into helping with an attack on the temple. Bruck was lashing out. He was a better swordsmen, but his anger made him unbalanced. I knocked him back. And he fell. I’ve forgotten a lot of details about him as a person, but I still remember his body at the bottom of the falls.”
"That’s...awful. I’m sorry.” Anakin said helplessly. He had known the bare basics of Xanatos’s fall, but clearly not the full story.
Obi-Wan sighed, leaning slightly to press their shoulders together. Anakin scootched over to try and provide a little extra silent comfort.
“I thought I had learned to live with my guilt over my part in what happened to him, but I suppose recent events have torn open old scars, so to speak.”
Anakin held his breath, Obi-Wan didn’t add anything else.
“Obi-Wan” he tried to nudge gently.
“Hmm?”
Anakin lost his patience, jumping up. “Master, please!” He half yelled, looming over his Master. A flash of fear crossed Obi-Wan’s expression as he looked up, which immediately halted the fit of rage.
He knelt down penitently, “I’m sorry, Obi-Wan, I shouldn’t have yelled, but please, let me help. I won’t get mad like that again, I swear. Whatever you need, I’m here for you.”
“You’re not.” Obi-Wan whispered, expression blank. He shuddered all over, fists clenching tightly.
“You’re NOT here for me!” Obi-Wan shouted, suddenly offended. “How can you POSSIBLY claim to be there for anyone after what you-” Obi-Wan seemed to choke on the words. He let out a strangled cry and pulled his knees up to his chest. Tears welled, but he didn’t seem to notice.
Anakin stared wide-eyed, cold all over. “This...this is about something I did. I don’t understand. You... told me a few hours that I’m dear to you, what...what could I have done since then to make you...I don’t understand.”
“You know what you did.” Obi-Wan let out. “And the fact that learning about it didn’t stop me from caring about you doesn’t help, it just makes the heartbreak a thousand times more painful.”
Anakin racked his brain wildly. This couldn’t be about his marriage with Padme, right? He told him this morning that he didn’t mind the sneaking off. There was only one screw-up big enough that could possibly warrant this severe a reaction, and only two people alive knew about that, both sworn to secrecy.
“The younglings,” Obi-Wan whispered. “You - you didn’t even spare the younglings.” Obi-wan looked gutted, terrified.
Anakin felt like he had been dropped in ice water. This was- this was his worst fear- that Obi-Wan would learn about his darkest failing as a Jedi and be ashamed of him, angry at him, would abandon him. He had already made his judgement. How could he have even learned about about the Tuskens?
“Padme-” he breathed out. “Padme told-”
“No!” Obi-Wan denied desperately, lurching forward. “Padme would never betray you! I would never betray you! We both love you, Anakin. Please, some part of you must know that! You must!”
His master seemed frantic, fingernails digging painfully into Anakin’s arm.
“You love me?” Anakin asked brokenly, heart cracked open.
Obi-Wan let go of Anakin to curl in on himself again. He seemed very small. It hurt to look at.
“I think its safe to say at this point that there’s nothing you could, no betrayal or atrocity you could commit that would make me stop loving you. Despite what you’ve done, you’re my brother, my son- of course I love you. The fact that I led you to doubt my love for you might be my greatest failing, though there are so many its hard to really say.” Obi-Wan sounded utterly defeated.
Anakin’s heart was pounding. This was a nightmare and a childhood dream. Obi-Wan loved him unconditionally, but he knew about his slaughter of the Tusken's and was ashamed. This couldn’t be real. He can’t know.
“Palpatine-” Anakin tried to ask.
Obi-Wan growled. “I do not need to talk about how that power-hungry liar systematically worked to tear us apart. I want to know why you would-” he cut himself off again.
Palpatine told Obi-Wan- that was more than he could even begin to process.
"I’m sorry, Master. I’m so sorry for failing you.” The words came desperately tumbling out, “I was just- I was so angry about my mom’s death and-”
“Your mother’s death? You killed innocent children for the sake of your Mother?! I don’t- how could anyone possibly rationalize-” Obi-Wan hissed out, truly angry for the first time that day. He took a deep breath and pulled himself upright.
“Your mother’s death was a terrible tragedy and I will forever regret my role in it. I should have tried harder to free her, for her own sake. I was so afraid that if I pushed for permission with the council they would think I was failing you, and they would take you from me. I made- so many decisions out of attachment, out of fear of losing you, and in the end I hurt you so badly you couldn’t trust me. You didn’t trust me with the truth of your visions, so I gave you bad advice born of misunderstanding, and your mother died horribly. I- I can see how you would blame the Jedi for that, even if its not rational. I certainly understand why you would blame me for that, why you would hate me because of her death.”
Obi-Wan scrubbed at his face mercilessly, practically tearing skin in his haste to wipe away snot and tears.
“But why, if you were getting revenge, would you kill the children and not me?” “Why couldn’t you just kill me and be satisfied?” He finally looked straight at Anakin, asking like it was a real question.
Anakin was horrified. After a few false starts he finally choked out, “Master, I love you. I told you, you’re the closest thing I have to a father. You’re the last person I could ever kill.”
“The last person you could ever kill,” Obi-Wan echoed back, looking pained.
“Please, Master, tell me how to fix this. I want to make things right. How can I fix things?” Anakin begged.
“That’s not a fair question. You can’t unmurder people. You can’t put them back together like a- an engine or a droid- ”
“There has to be something I can do to make you forgive me!” Anakin said desperately. “You can’t just tell me you love me and then say I’m an irredeemable monster!”
“Well that’s an entirely different matter, though no less cruel to think about.”
He leaned into Anakin’s side once more, the press providing a hint of warmth even in the unshakable cold. “Anakin, it isn’t very rational or fair of me, but it wouldn’t really take that much to get me to forgive you. Kriff, if you just acted sorry for what you had done.” Obi-Wan sighed.
“If you told me that you regretted the lives you took and swore you were going to stop murdering, force help me, I’d probably take you back in an instant. All I ever wanted was to help you be the best version of yourself.”
“I’m sorry.” Anakin said immediately. “I’m so, so sorry for what I did. I lost control of myself because I was scared, and angry, and suffering and, and then I was so scared that you would hate me that I pretended it was ok, and I told myself that they deserved to die, but how could children ever deserve to die and please Master I’ll throw away my lightsaber just please, please don’t leave me, I need you, please-” and the rest of the words dissolved into large, ugly sobs.
Obi-Wan keened and pulled Anakin into his lap like he was a child again. Anakin scrabbled at his cloak, desperately trying to hold on. The terrible chill that had been haunting him slowly started to fade away as he was rocked back and forth.
After a minute, Anakin got enough of a hold on himself to consider trying to stop blubbering like a crecheling on his Master’s robes. But he quickly realized that Obi-Wan was also crying, so instead threw his arms around the older man and let himself go.
An uncertain amount of time passed before they both slowed from heaving sobs, to dry hiccups, to quiet whimpers. Eventually they ended up laying in a heap, boneless but for their hold on each other. And finally, the cavern was more or less silent.
Anakin felt physically lighter, mind clear like he had just completed an extremely successful meditation session.
Without a word, they slowly shifted so they were leaning on the wall instead of sprawled on the ground. Obi-Wan pulled his robe off, first using it to wipe his face, then tenderly cleaning his Padwan’s.
Anakin just chuckled.
Obi-Wan threw the robe so it covered the two of them, which was a little gross, but that only made Anakin snort giddily.
They sat there peacefully for sometime. The shadows from above started shifting, and Obi-Wan sighed, “I really should go eat something.”
Anakin sighed back at him in agreement. They both stretched in the small space, joints popping.
“Do you need to walk through the rest of the gardens first?” Anakin asked.
“No,” Obi-Wan replied, tenderly fussing with his kid’s hair and robes so they looked presentable. “This was...more than I could have hoped for.”
Anakin beamed, giving Obi-Wan one last quick hug before gesturing upwards. “Time to get back to the real world?” he joked with a hint of regret.
“Time to get back to the real world.” Obi-Wan repeated heavily.
Part VII
#star wars#star wars au#my au#time travel#suicidal misunderstanding au#Its about the DOUBLE MEANINGS in every conversation#Its about not Understanding because UNEXPECTED TIME TRAVEL is involved but also they’re idiots#obi wan gets a hug#fanfic#star wars au no 27#why anakin#just why
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Anonymous:
note: i ramble a lot here again. so for everyone's sake ive decided to turn things in parentheses blue 😔👊
anyways i realize itd be kind of awkward to say more stuff. so ive decided to separate this into two different asks due to the change in topic because Man Do I Have Thoughts. Like. All The Time Every Day. this is more of a stream of consciousness thing than an actual theory
but like. you know how "the king IS siffrin" or whatever is a thing. like. a theory that i think most people have?? after finishing the game??? (source: i successfully convinced a friend of mine to get the game and during our post-game conversation she did tell me that the king being siffrin somehow was an idea she briefly had)
and i think weve talked about it before and that. like. how unlikely it is that the king IS siffrin due to the fact that its. uh. too obvious?? well i thought of two (2) more reasons that its (probably) not true:
1. since you own the artbook youd know that siffrin's pronouns are he/they and the king's are he/him. unless future!siffrin decided "hm... today i will go by he/him :)" theyre probably not the same person
2. i faintly remember going through adrienne's twitter and seeing that last year's april fools joke was something about "the king is the only queer character in the cast and that the rest are cishet. ha ha just kidding!!" and since that implies that the king is cishet (...does it??? i am very bad at reading comprehension sometimes) i feel like thatd be a very weird joke to make in reference to a character who has been explicitly confirmed to canonically be both non-binary and ace
HOWEVER. i do think itd go verily hard if siffrin was like. "the prince" or something. i KNOW this is like the third time ive suggested the idea of siffrin's title/character class changing into something else and im SO sorry but please bear with me here. basically. i am thinking about flowey undertale's line of "i am the prince of this world's future". that's literally it. also please ignore the fact that "prince" is also the name of a homestuck class thing i literally havent looked at homestuck since 2019 so i dont remember what each classpect is all about BUT @any homestucks who may be reading this if reading this makes you end up classpecting siffrin as a prince of time then i WILL cry/j /lh
(if i remember my homestuck classes correctly though then a prince is someone who destroys their aspect or destroys using the power of their aspect. so a prince of time would be someone who either destroys time itself and so leaves everything in a timeless state (such as. oh i dunno. freezing the very flow of time itself) OR someone who destroys using the power of time (e.g. freezing living beings in time and thus effectively "killing" them). hm. [imagine me glaring very hard at the king right now])
anyways im not gonna suggest the idea of a character who goes by "the prince" in sasasa and then leave without any further explanation. so like heres my own two cents on it while working under the assumption that siffrin IS said prince. basically. i have very mixed feelings about the idea of siffrin being the king's kid or something (plus! look at the man! he clearly doesn't have a wife! and as divorce anon let me tell you, he's divorced at best!/j) and besides. judging from the shape of siffrin's crafts and what the artbook itself says on it he's PROBABLY not from vaugarde (although i guess to be fair the artbook never explicitly states that siffrin ISN'T from vaugarde so i guess it could be like. deliberate trickery and tomfoolery. maybe being the prince just makes you Built Different™ and turns your crafts to look like that. i dunno. but personally even though i think the concept of siffrin as "distant traveler returning to the hometown they haven't seen in a long, long time" could definitely be done well i have unfortunately grown too attached to the idea of siffrin being from some faraway place. and besides. isn't four (4) vaugardians a Bit Much? im pretty sure much of the appeal for sasasa's main cast is something something found family + people from all walks of life and places all over the earth and whatever coming together and becoming the closest of companions. so i feel like making the researcher the sole foreigner kind of defeats the point.) so my idea on how being the prince works is that its like. a weird messed up magical "natural order of the universe" thing where "the king" and "the prince" are magical titles ushered and forced onto you by the universe/fate itself and being the king. well. being the king just gives you unimaginable power over time and also makes you Like That. meanwhile being the prince kinda uuuh. you know. may make your craft turn into stars regardless of what it should be but DEFINITELY makes something very, very bad and traumatizing involving time happen to you which may or may not be a time loop where you die repeatedly (the time loop could be caused by something else! who knows! the main point is just to make the prince have an awful relationship with the concept of time and/or the passage of it. see: the king's whole motive being to freeze the flow of time itself because he could not handle the change that inherently comes with the passage of time). in conjunction with my previous "exile siffrin" theory this COULD be why they got exiled. either way, when the current king dies, then the current prince gets dragged screaming and kicking by fate itself like "come here. you will become the sole ruler of a tyrannical monarchy whether or not you like it <3" into becoming the new king or something. this promotion may or may not be immediately apparent to the new king. i dunno. i made most of this up on the fly. i DO think itd be very messed up in a fun way though if it is written in fate itself that the current prince will be the one to kill the current king. and hey. what do you know. siffrin is the one who ultimately deals the final killing blow to the king in the true ending.
(ps. this has literally nothing to do with the rest of the theory (if you could call it that) but what are your thoughts on the idea of like. the rest of the bosses in sasasa2 being named after chess pieces. with the combination of the king being named the way he is, the game being in black&white, siffrin's colors being mostly an inversion of the king's (siffrin has (a patch of) black hair but is dressed in white, meanwhile the king has white hair but is dressed in black), fate being a reoccurring theme in sasasa so far and it being a Bad Thing, and something something about a pawn (who is destined to move only in a straight line until the end of the board, much like how siffrin cannot stray from his journey until the very end) getting promoted when it reaches the end of the chessboard, i personally think itd be VERY cool/g)
Wait, holy heck, I didn’t know asks could come in blue
I'm gonna post this now and type a response later because it's been in my inbox for far too long, but heck yeah more theories with Divorce Anon time
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