#its very. 'maybe life didnt turn out how you wanted or how it was intended but thats ok

[bulbabutt]

okay. lets bite the bullet and talk about 2012. lets talk about child abuse, familial abuse, generational abuse, toxic family units, whatever you wanna call it. lets talk about it and whether it exists in this show. i actually encourage you to read this no matter what your take is, just to hear it out. let me be FUCKING clear: i love this show, but i get scared to talk about it seriously. everyone on every side is defensive all the time but i love every turtles show to no end.

this post is going to go over so well and not controversially at all.

precursor: every splinter is some level of shitty dad. he always has been. the fucking bare bones of the character is that he raised his children to kill the man who killed his own father. thats inherently fucked up. every splinter has some level of fucked up about him. maybe hes inattentive, or neglectful, or strict, or secretive, maybe hes just not very good at dealing with his kids. splinter is supposed to be far from perfect. thats what makes him splinter. maybe he grows over the course of a series, maybe he doesnt. maybe hes supposed to be shitty his whole life, maybe hes not. thats just splinter. each is adapted differently depending on the story being told.

and 2012 has a very interesting tone to its story.

lets start at the beginning, back in japan. this is season 3, was this story what they intended when they started writing the show back in season 1? probably not, theres probably things they would have written differently had they known this was where splinter's story started. thats kind of the way tv works, you add the details later. but for our sake of analyzing the character of splinter as a whole, it seems best to start here as if its all intentional.

hamato yoshi is a member of the hamato clan. theyre a very traditional old ninja clan in the modern world, they have old feuds and theyre trying to keep their culture alive. they're literally the last of a clan of ninjas like this, having (supposedly) defeated the foot clan (their generational enemies) back when yoshi was a baby. hes set out to lead next, and its very important to him. and yet hes married to a woman who works in the city, a modern woman who doesnt live the life he does. she even moved to be with him. i feel the need to compare this to how men in the real world who want traditional wives never go for women who are willing to be their housewives, always try to break down the independent ones. splinter seems unconcerned with how his wife wants to live. with how she wants their daughter to be raised.

im not necessarily saying this is how this comes off in the show, but i find it interesting to think about. this is absolutely the most rounded version of tang shen as a character (thus far) it stops her being just a name on a page "hamato yoshi's love and the object of his enemies affections who died" and turns her into a woman who has a stake in the story. gives her more agency.

its very interesting that this show implies an actual relationship between tang shen and oroku saki, albeit a one-sided one that didnt work out, but they do seem to have parted on equal ground. the pair of them discuss yoshi's inattentive duties as a husband and father, that he's too obsessed with the tradition and lineage of his clan. honestly, if this woman just took her baby and left no one would blame her! he has his priorities set, and it leaves no room for her and their newborn baby. if she ran away with saki at this point, the story would make just as much sense.

but then disaster strikes, saki learns the truth about his family, that he was actually a child of the foot clan (honestly i wish we saw this play out instead of jumping ahead in the story but thats not what this post is about) and he kills he and yoshi's father. revenge for him having killed his. cycles of abuse and revenge that never end. the pair of them were raised in this society that values lineage like this, that would kill for it. its no wonder they both grew up this way.

anyway, tang shen is killed by a blow meant for yoshi, and saki takes their child and raises her. based on splinter's lack of desire to be a father so far in the story, its honestly not one you can blame him for. its fucked up, but it makes sense. saki does to miwa exactly what his father did to him. cycles of abuse and revenge.

yoshi loses everything, and moves to america. he's turned into splinter the mutant rat, and gains four turtle sons.

so as established, he's not exactly grown up with a stable family life. he obviously, while human, wasnt acting as a stable father for the child he intended to have. so how good is he at this?

ive talked before about how the 2003 show treats the turtles as kind of one whole unit. they don't have individual relationship arcs, they dont have overarching storylines where they grow apart or closer, they're always in each other's corner.

2012 makes this more dynamic. here we see that 15 years seeing no one but each other, growing under this splinter has come with its own quirks. these brothers dont understand each other that well. they get jealous of each others treatment, some are left out, some are misunderstood. raph resents leo, none of them appreciate what donnie does, mikey bothers everyone else for attention, etc. it creates a really good starting place for this show.

(the issue i have with this show is more that they never really open or close any of these beats, at least not in ways that last. but boy does it make for some good dramatic scenes)

we see over the course of this first season that splinter treats his children just as he was, as little ninjas more so than sons. he raises them to follow his traditions, the ones tang shen never cared for. but this is all he knows how to be! you cant really blame him.

most people bring up mikey as the quintessential example when they talk about this, i dont want to do that cuz i know you've all heard it. while i think his father does disrespect him and i think it is paid forward and his brothers do too, i'd rather talk about raph for a change.

in one episode, raph loses his temper. to teach him a lesson, splinter makes his brothers pelt him in training while insulting him any way they can, and tells him to just... not lose his temper. this is a terrible lesson in general. instead of trying to coax out why he might be angry, it just plays up that if he loses his temper bad things happen.

splinter in this episode basically encourages bullying. this comes up a lot when it comes to raph. to compare, in 2003 when raph loses his temper, hes told to blow off steam which he does. his brothers don't blame him for having emotional outbursts, they know thats just how he is so they know how he needs to cope with it. he's given the physical space to let it out.

im not saying this show needs to be like that show, im just saying thats a version of this story where the outcome is better for raph as a whole. since this outcome is not as good for him emotionally, you can tell why he's still got these emotional issues. splinter never helps him more than that. thats more why this raph differs from that one, if that makes sense. one has his family in his corner more than the other.

speaking of. raph has a pet turtle. this turtle is the only one he can talk to about how he feels. why might that be? it's the only thing hes kind and gentle to, and he refuses to let his brothers make him feel weak for being kind to it. where did he learn to be ashamed of being kind and gentle? thats a learned behaviour. in a house full of other men... yeah, that would happen. but whos values start that?

when this turtle gets some mutagen spilled on it, it tries to get revenge on his family. there is such a resentment going on here, its extremely juicy. the show chalks this up to "post mutation insanity", but its just as easy to think that everything raph has experienced has made him seem angry and resentful and perhaps scared to his pet, and that former pet wants raph to himself so they can be free. the frustrated venting of a child complaining about how no one understands him in such a big way turns slash into a vengeful monster, cuz thats all he's ever heard. it makes sense, he went from a little turtle to a fully cognizant adult aged being in an instant. emotionally no one would handle that well, and definitely not someone whos only ever heard the worst about people.

he comes around later. notably by being on his own, away from the hamatos.

again, im not saying the show is writing this intentionally, but i think tonally its in the zone where you could see this analysis as being canon. that these little pieces of narrative fit the worldview of a toxic family unit that isnt dealing with its problems in a healthy way.

there's other small aspects. leo slaps mikey early on, having seen it on his favourite show be used as a way of getting someone to calm down. mikey questions this behaviour, leo seems to feel bad about it when questioned. if we know that that behaviour was bad, what other things might he emulate in a similar way?

there's things like donnie's predatory behaviour towards april. in a world where all they ever knew was splinter's stories of the outside world (and perhaps television from decades earlier), hearing splinter's story of his love for tang shen, his rivalry with his own brother over her, you could actually see why he would behave the way he does, why he claims her the way he does. not as an excuse, but as a reason he learned the behaviour. and there's multiple opportunities for his father to tell him off. he never does. why would he? he knows no better.

this splinter, unlike every other, is not old or disabled. he doesnt require a cane (at the start, but also was never a good cane) and its interesting that despite being like... a 40 year old man in the peak of his life he does not accompany his sons on missions. he sits around doing nothing and disproves of his sons heroic actions. april literally calls him out for this at one point. the show is actually telling us some of this man's behaviour is wrong.

one of the more upsetting things that happens in this household is a lot of physical hitting. "theyre training" you might say. understandable. but when you see a lot of hitting come from the father in this show, played for a laugh, when you see splinter play the "drunk master" bit it makes you think. is that okay? isnt that a bit much?

the end of the muckman episode is a freeze frame of splinter (after having knocked out all of his sons to punish them for leaving while grounded) turning his anger on april and her running away. idk thats just not funny to me. this is a bit of the dating of the show, 2012 was a time where character's in shows were meaner, less affectionate, more bullying in nature. that was the sense of humour at the time. that isnt me making a judgment, it's just kind of the era. a pre steven universe world, if that makes sense. so many of the jokes that end in a hit aren't funny in 2024. especially not when they come from a parent.

when this splinter speaks about his kids to their brothers he often ends up insulting them. "you should be like mikey, he never overthinks because he doesn't think", this would be a big reason the boys speak about each other the way they do to their faces. puts forward a bit more of that bullying thing i mentioned earlier. if their own father talks about them like this, of course their brothers do too. so of course they join in and give payback.

again. splinter wasnt raised in a normal family. he was raised in a ninja commune with a bunch of murderers. he wasn't great with his wife and baby daughter. its not surprising that he's bad at this.

so, ive just said a bunch of things about what's wrong with this household as a whole. i think ive explained why the family unit behaves the way it does: generational teachings of feuds and traditional values. i dont think this makes the show bad! i, in fact, wish there was more of it. i think theres so much low hanging fruit that the show kind of wants to play with, but cant fully bring itself to.

specific example: during the space arc on a planet thats driving all the characters emotions against each other we get this amazing scene where raph screams at leo for being splinter's favourite. leo responds by hugging him. its really well done!

however its never brought up again, never actually getting into the nitty gritty of why raph feels like that is exactly what i think makes this show resonate with so many people

its dark! it pulls at your heart strings! it makes people feel seen! we go in mikey's head at one point and see such splintered (lol) personalities in his head. he has a huge anger problem (much like raph) in there. he retreats into imagination land when stressed. the show kind of toys with "these kids are fucked up!" but never lets those character moments go anywhere. i love how fucked up this family is. its so complex, it feels real. at least real to me. i wish it went that little step further and let the characters talk about these things a little more.

maybe you have a different experience, and thats fine! but i wouldnt brush off people like me who look at 2012 and say "these dynamics make me uncomfortable". to excuse it by saying "my family is like that and we're fine" sometimes i just wanna say... <:/ are you? have you talked about that? and if that's your read on it is that its fine, thats great. but some people notice patterns and those patterns can make them uncomfortable. i hope ive explained the patterns here.

i think thats why the fandom is as big as it is. this show would lead to the most amazing deep introspective fan-works youve ever seen, it lays the pieces out so perfectly for you to draw your own conclusions about why they are this way. you cant really blame people for talking about it as if its got a way higher rating than it does. it feels like it does.

i should say, i dont even know if i blame the show on its own for leaving those pieces laying there, it was on nickelodeon. i sense studio meddling in the tone. i mean, given that the show wanted to end with the big mutant apocalypse storyline, and yet the network wanted to end it with the big 87 crossover..... yeah i think its safe to say nick would rather they keep it light.

which is funny, because i think the most controversial thing i can say is i personally love the finale arc as the mutant apocalypse. it so encapsulates my favorite part of this show. to end this show in the darkest timeline and say "even though these characters are so far removed from who they used to be and even though the entire world is over they still have each other in the end" and i find that so perfect.

so. i understand that this is always a touchy topic. i know people want to brush it off as "people say the 12 brothers are abusive to mikey but mikey is fine", and i think thats a really skewed version of it from both sides. first of all. mikey is not fine, look in that boys head. look how he copes. he's not. but also, mikey is not the only victim. they all are. these turtles are victims of their upbringing, victims of generational war. of men who didnt know how to be good fathers in the first place. and thats good writing! it feels deep! it connects!

for more context: any fucked up way you can think of karai being raised by shredder? its probably the same way here. splinter and shredder were raised the same way.

i guess i think about this a lot, cuz i always see things like "oh, rise fans write crossovers where the rise boys love each other and have to teach the 12 boys how to be nice cuz they dont like 2012!" and i just think to myself:

guys. do you understand why a person might do that? why would someone (likely a teenager) want 2012 mikey to be treated nicely by a kinder more openly affectionate version of his own family? do i need to spell that out for you? why do we connect with media at all, why do we write our own stories about it?

if you genuinely dont. i mean, im glad for you. but sometimes you wanna imagine a world in which your own family is more openly affectionate with you. where they hug and tell you theyre proud and love you and you never have to question it, never have to look elsewhere for that kind of approval. its less that they're idolizing rise, and more that they're looking at the two families and saying "this one is emotionally mature and in touch with their feelings more than that one. how would that play out?"

doctor feelings ass response.

look, im not saying everyone understands 2012, that everyone likes or needs to like it. im just trying to say that i think these fucked up parts of 2012 are all around my favourite parts of the show. its an inspiring story about this fucked up little family that has no one but each other, and they're not great about it. they try, but they don't always get it right. i just wish the show would have talked about that part more. but i think that since it doesnt people get to fill in those blanks themselves, and they do it so beautifully. and i really wish people on the internet would be more kind to one another when they wanted to discuss these darker themes they find in it.

these are the reasons i love this show. i think its so very interesting that splinter dies this fucked up father figure who never really apologized for his behaviour. i like that raph needs to be held to stop punching his brothers. that leo doesnt have a good grip on what it is to be a leader, that he tries bad ways of doing it. i like that no one copes well! i like that their relationships are so complex! this show is messy! its good! i wish it was more messy!

and id love if we could be more honest about these things and how they make us feel instead of just brushing each other off as "likes the show" or "doesnt like the show". the things that make me uncomfortable are why i love this show and i'm pretty sure i'm not alone there.

[chiefdirector]

I'm feeling kinda sappy.

Could I ask for a story where Gibbs gets married to the reader and she moves into his house. Gibbs is away on a case and maybe she starts going through boxes in the basement and digs up pictures of his mom, dad, Kelly and Shannon. She hangs up a bunch of their pictures on a wall. Gibbs comes home sees it. He stares at it and is very quiet. The reader is nervous but then Gibbs tells her it's perfect and no one he's ever been married to wanted to honor them like this.

we keep this love in a photograph... | Jethro Gibbs | NCIS

I know it isn't exactly how you asked, but i took a few liberties, hope you don't mind

-

(Y/N) knew she shouldn't have been snooping around, it could break the trust that she worked so hard to earn, but she couldn't resist. Jethro had recently asked her to move in with him, a big step considering the nature of their relationship. They had to work together and trust that their lives would be safe in the other's hands, but living together meant not only trusting your life with someone, but opening it up to them too.

She knew that Jethro had a past filled with too much sorrow for one man to carry alone. He had tried to bury it in failed marriage after failed marriage, eventually resigning himself to the bachelor lifestyle. He had tried to continue his ways when he met her, but she was something new, something unexpected.

Vance had given (Y/N) the day off to move her stuff in and get settled fully. She had spent countless nights and weeks here with her lover but had never really left anything here except a toothbrush and a spare set of clothes. She never really needed anything more. It was easy enough to part ways with most of her belongings, sofas and dinings chairs never meant all to much anyways. Managing to fit most of her stuff her a pick-up truck, she had set off to her new home.

It was only when she opened the old hallway cupboard to store her now empty suitcases did she find the box. It wasn't labeled, but the creases and fingermarks on the cardboard showed that it had been opened and shut rigorously over the years. The rest of Jethro house was meticulously organised, there wasn't anything that didnt have its own place. Nothing was stored where it wasn't meant to. Especially old boxes.

Slowly, she opened the box and peered inside, being greeted by several picture frames. Most of them were empty, or cracked. There was no reason to keep any of them. Still she flicked through the frames. Lifting the last, she made eye contact with a young redhead holding a small infant. Even though (Y/N) didn't recognise the faces, she knew who they belonged to; Shannon and Kelly.

Quickly, she put the box back, but left the final frame out. She placed it on the sofa before trekking down to the basement, her mind focussed on one thing only.

----

Jethro got home hours after the sunset.

The house was quiet and still, he had expected as much. After toeing off his shoes, made his was through the house, intending to set the coffee maker ready for the morning. One less thing to think about in the far too early hours of the day. He stopped before he made it to the kitchen.

Jethro wasn't a man that hesitated, but the sight of his smiling wife and daughter handing on the wall made him freeze. Her bright eyes and red hair was the last thing he had expected to see, but after the day he had, he couldn't be more thankful.

He took a moment, turning to his left to find (Y/N) laying on the couch, nails and hammer strewn messily on the coffee table. Her engagement ring shone in the moonlight. Gently, he shook her shoulder to wake her.

(Y/N) hummed tiredly. "You're home?"

"Thank you." Jethro said, ignoring her question.

She shot up at the memory of what she had done. Making eye contact with him, then the photograph. "You don't mind. I didn't overstep, did I?"

"Not at all." Jethro sat next to her, wrapping his arm around her shoulder to pull her onto his chest. "Not at all."

Tags:

@innercreationflower

[laniissocool]

starboy

pairing(s): jack champion x actress!fem!reader

warnings: none really ? she/her pronouns, fem reader, cursing, mentions of stabbing and scream VI spoilers i think ? also not proof-read and lowercase intended !

a/n: hi everyone !! so this is my first fic and i do plan on doing a second part. i really am more of a reader than i am a writer so please leave criticism in the replies !! also instead of y/n or reader i use just a blank (___) so let me know if i should change that and i dont know whether this is fluff or angst or like in the middle ? i’d say its a normal story but wtvr !! hope you enjoy !

you made your way onto set. you walked with your tote bag thrown over your shoulder, phone in hand as you walked pretty fast without looking up. knowing how clumsy you were, you were surprised you hadn’t bumped into anything yet. or maybe anyone. you got a text and opened as fast as someone could blink as soon as you saw the name. 

jackkk💫:

R U Coming to set yet?🎥

you:

omw !! ready 4 me 2 stab u ?🔪🔪🩸

jackkk💫:

As ready as I’ll ever be😵‍💫

you asked jack if he wanted you to show him how to turn on all lowercase, but he refused. he said typing like someone’s dad is cool.

you caught yourself smiling at your phone before turning it off and looking around as you walked. 

a few minutes later you made it to your trailer. you walked in and turned on the light, cracking your knuckles then tossing your bag on the small couch you had. you took your phone back out and texted jack.

you:

i’m here in my trailer, come get me ghostface👻👻

seen at 1:14

you thought it was sweet that there was a mutual thing between you and jack where it was completely needed and necessary to end all texts with an emoji, if either of you couldn’t find one you’d have to call or send an audio message.

about an hour later, everyone got their costumes on and ready to film. you were so thankful that the character you played, Elena, gave off the same vibes as you, so, you could dress her yourself. sometimes even with your own clothing. maybe it was your face ? you were very pretty, after all. a kind of rarer pretty, like a magical pretty ? but it definitely was not just your conventional attractive pretty. everyone got on set and you saw jack for the first time that day. you ran up to him and hugged him, your arms wrapped around his waist, in a friendly way. he hugged you back and you pulled away after a few seconds. 

“ y’know, i think you’re a pretty good-looking killer “ you said to him with a soft smirk. 

you guys always flirted with eachother, not even realizing. 

“ why thank you “ he said in a weird accent. 

before you started filming the prop guys had to fix some stuff so you guys got a quick break. you walked over to jack’s trailer, which he wasn’t in and sat down eating some gummies you found in your bag. after a few minutes jack comes inside without making noise since the door was cracked open already. he closes the door behind him silently and sits right next to you. he peeked over onto your phone as you played your favorite game. even though it wasn’t really fun to watch, he was insantly interested in anything you were. you didn’t even realize he was there because of how into it you were, besides, he didnt make a sound.  you noticed when he reached over to your bag of Haribos to get one. you jumped and almost dropped your phone.

“ shit, jack ! fuck ! you scared the life out of me “ you said with your hand that held your phone up to your heart. 

he burst out into a fit of laughter.

“ your- “ he couldn’t even speak without laughing. after about a minute or two of him laughing wiping his tears and you staring at him like he’s insane he finally says something. 

“ your face, ____ your face ! you looked at me like i’d just stabbed you ! “ he said, still with a smile from ear to ear on his face.

you looked at him with an unimpressed look on your face, scoffing at him as you bit back a smile. 

“ it wasn’t even that funny, idiot “ you said as you ran your tongue across your teeth trying not to smile. he saw right through you.

“ you wanna laugh so badly, don’t you ? ” he said as he looked down at you. you looked up at him, with a soft smile on your face. you laughed a little too as you had to give in. the room went silent and awkward as you’d looked at each others faces for a few seconds. unconciously, you both leaned in. you looked at his lips and your full lips parted a bit. your heart was pounding but you didn’t know that his was too. your lips touched and your hand travels up his chest to the back of his neck, sliding up to grab a handful of his curly hair. you pulled him closer and before you knew it you were turning your head into the kiss. both hands around his neck now as you tugged lightly on his brown locks. then you realized. you really realized. you were close to, but not quite making out with jack champion. he was your starboy. you’d never believed it, even if you told yourself from this morning that you kissed jack champion for a good, 30 seconds, you wouldn’t believe it.

you opened your eyes and they widened, looking back at him. his cheeks a flushed, rosy color. as were yours. you opened your mouth to say something but nothing came out.

you got up and he did as well after you, towering over you. he looked at you with eyes that were saying that he wanted you to say something. anything. you couldn’t. physically, nothing could come out. you had no idea what was going on, you never thought of jack in that way. or, well, in the way that you would kiss him for almost a minute straight kind of way. you walked out practically running to your trailer. 

all jack could do was watch, he was frozen and just as, if not even more shocked than you were. as you walked you remembered all the times you were around him. you’d get butterflies. he could be in the same room as you and you’d get butterflies but you’d labeled it as ‘nervousness’ for ‘no reason’. but it’d only ever happen around him. him. then you realized, the non-purpose flirting, the butterflies, the need to be around him. you were inlove with him ! god, how didn’t you notice before. that’s why everyone would look at you too with funny eyes whenever you’d flirt without knowing, thinking it was a friendship thing that only you two did around each other.

everyone probably definitely knew. they knew how you felt before you did. you opened the door to your trailer and locked it. you sat down as thoughts raced through your mind. how would you tell him ? how would you tell jenna and devyn and liana ? did he like it ? did he mean it how you meant it ? was it just a kiss for him ? .. is jack inlove with you too ?

[fcknstar]

,, as his assistant "

- harryosborn x reader

a.n : i honestly wanted to make this more intense like but im too sleep deprived to write more lmao, this is all i can manage. this could go to a 'smut' direction but i realized that im not confident in writing it. but heyyy im on a posting streak!! im gonna write for other characters, but the harry content will still be coming through!

warnings : jealousy? , suggestive ending

**lowercase intended**

being able to work for harry was a thing you never saw coming. you did like harry. but being his assistant forced you to keep things professional with him. which greatly annoyed you. you werent exactly sure how you got the job, you were just attending a meeting held by harry with your lawyer when he claimed you as his assistant. but why complain when your pay increased.

you and harry threw flirty comments, shared jokes. and maybe shared more than just jokes. but that was old news. having a hold of harrys schedule infuriated you as being his personal assistant meant you had to meddle with his private life outside work. it hurt you knowing that harry started going on dates and looking at his schedule served a great reminder that he was out of your league.

" harry, you have a date at 8.30 tonight with a charlotte. the location where the date is held is at Le Grenouille " looking up from your tablet, locking eyes with harry who seemed to be deep in thought.

" uhh, harry? " waving your hand infront of him was able to get him out of his little day dream. a confused face of his only confirmed that he wasnt paying attention. repeating his schedule once again, the information finally sinked in.

" right, thank you. uhm, are you able to pick out some suit for me? " he said in a hurried tone. raising an eyebrow, you questioned, " hm, this date of yours seems very important " you chuckled, walking towards his desk which was messy. helping harry clear and organize his desk, he noticed how gentle and smooth your hand is when his accidentally glided across yours.

" yea. no? im not entirely sure. i guess i just wanna make an impression? " placing the last document in his cupboard, locking it up.

" the ceo of oscorp wanting to make an impression " he caught on to your cheeky tone that you thought was able to mask your jealousy. but to your luck, you werent that very great with facial expressions. you however tried to busy yourself and walked harry out of his office, leading him to the elevator.

" why? is my assistant jealous? " he really hit a nerve when he emphasized the word assistant. noticing how your gaze on the glass door falter, he laughed.

" well why would i be when im able to find other important things to care about. but sure, ill be able to help you pick out a suit. " harry didnt seem to like your answer very much. what are the other important business were you talking about? looking at you work on your tablet peacefully calmed his soul somehow. he enjoyed seeing you focused, giving him the excuse to stare knowing you are too focused to notice.

" youre staring again " you whispered out, when you looked up at the glass door when it opened. noticing the way harrys cheek flush confused you.

the way back to his penthouse was silent. helping harry pick out his suit was harder than you thought. tonight was different as he wasnt satisfied with any of the suits you helped him pick out. being exhausted, you rasped out, " sir, harry. you are going to be late for your date. its eight ten and you have not found a suit. you do know that the drive to the restaurant is long? " looking into his closet again, you saw another suit. hand out to grab the suit, you felt a hand ever so softly touch your waist.

" eh, how bout you just cancel it or something. " turning to face him, you place the said suit against his chest. ignoring his words, you turned him around for him to look at himself in the mirror. raising your eyebrow, you waited for his answer. " so? " you expected him to finally agree on the suit but what he did next was very much unexpected.

harry pushed your hand down, which dropped the perfectly ironed suit. he didn't seem to care about it though. walking towards you, he took your face in his hands, looking at you with love and care.

" you look tired. maybe stressed? how about i help you feel better? because as your boss, its my turn to return you the favour " caressing your cheeks with much adoration, eyes darkening with every second that passed.

[gikairan]

Current Rook backstory is turning out to be:

Foundling adopted by a military family? No, we're going with:

Born into slavery, and kinda torn away from his real family at a very young age and sold off If his parents named him, it didnt carry forward. He was just kinda "boy", "you" etc at his "new" household.

Not sure what age his magic came in, but I dont think this household ever wanted to acknowledge it.

And thats where Mercar comes in. I'm taking away the idea of "adopted this abandoned elf child out of the goodness of their heart uwu" no. They go around purchasing up slaves with magic, sponsoring their liberation, sending them to magic academy and then....

Sending them to the front lines :)

Maybe Not Slaves Anymore, But Not Technically Free Either. Its A Secret Third Thing - Indebted and told they should be Grateful to the Mercar family :)

He managed to wriggle out of the military after a few years or so

I'm still not quite sure how exactly he gets involved in the Shadow Dragons, but i sort of dont imagine hes got much of a life outside of them? Sure, maybe plenty of employment for mages in Tevinter, but I'm not 100% sure how legit his discharge is. I think its safe enough to use the Mercar name, but its also not a great idea to bring attention to himself just in case? Dont want anyone digging in papers to find a signature was forged or something to that effect....

"Rook" is just a codename thats come about by working with the Shadow Dragons, and since hes kinda got a pretty loose attachment to names as a concept - yeah it works. It serves the purpose for which it is intended, guess hes Rook now.

I dont know exactly where he was working as a Dragon though. Its not Dock Town, because the dialogue says its not his haunt. I also dont know if he has any place to actually live in. I just sort of assume he lives in his chapters Safe House....

[bmpmp3]

and you know recently i was thinking about the otome isekai vs otome game conundrum (a lot of the tropes and genre staples the isekai stories have in their fictional otome games are not very reflective of real life otome game trends historically) again and like ive mentioned before now that i dont mind that too much (although i do personally prefer my isekais generally to be into a book or a comic or something linear (or of course the classic isekai into the past or an alternate universe is also great) unless the story really goes out of its way to take advantage of video-gamey weirdness. if u die in the game u die in real life!!!!!!! shit like that LOL) but i was also thinking about like. i wonder how an isekai into an otome game would actually look like....

there is the problem that the localized scene is only a fraction of whats out there (although recent years have been very kind to us! but if u ever want good motivation to practice ur japanese, go on vndb and look at the sheer amount of jpn only psp otome games there are on this earth 😔 someday.....................) so if u were going based off the english speaking perception, otome games are like painfully varied genre and setting wise and full of high stakes action LOL we have been getting quite a few lower stakes ones about actors though recently....

alas as implied before i dont speak japanese (YET.......) so my knowledge is only secondhand and you should take everything i say with a grain of salt BUT it does seem in the jpn only psp era we had a LOT of highschool otome games, and it seems like samurai never go out of style. vaguely medieval and vaguely victorian fantasy is also a classic, although unlike most of the isekai stories it seems nowadays most villains will be men (another guy to romance) and villainesses are still pretty rare after like 2005.... but its still difficult to find a common denominator here to play off of cliches

BUT i do think there could be something funny about an isekai main character trying to remember the exact dialogue options needed to not get a random bad end HJWHRJDSHJFs oh fuck if i go left i'll run off a cliff and die!!! or was it right.....

but thats more on the character route-structure visual novel side of things, on the more stat-raiser-y true dating simulator side of things (we dont have a whole lot outside of a few indie games and a couple fantranslations) those seem to be largely fantasy (Angelique and the like) or high school stuff (there were ten bajillion on the psp and some ds ones too!)

many isekais do take the angelique fantasy story route, but it could be fun specifically to play on the princess competition premise. also didnt one angelique game let u play as the rival character? thats a bit intriguing...... but on the later highschool dating sim end of things i guess it makes sense thats not used as a setting that often LOL i mean I was playing storm lover kai like one wrong turn could kill me BUT that is not. the intended experience of these games hkjfdhjrkgfeldjfs but actually maybe it could be interesting for a horror or thriller story.... i just wanted to have fun being isekaied into my favourite romcom dating sim but everyones dying somehow????? this isnt in the programming?????????

i dunno its kinda fun to think about! i think usually among the english speaking audience the general consensus is that if they were isekaied into their favourite otome game they'd probably get killed immediately. if that says anything about the medium as a whole in the localized sphere.

[valla-chan]

copying this from my own tags cause actually i want to talk about this on the post after all.

Warning: Long text! feel free to skip!

I feel like having one parent of one kind and one of the other made me this fucking mess that i am now, in a way. It was never explicit or outright but it Never Needed To Be.

I would get harassed for my nails and hair and mannerisms and be made the butt of jokes that i didnt understand by one parent, and then the other would tell me im great the way i am. i guess also there was some kind of ongoing speculation between them as to what my sexuality was?? i do remember that.

It really created this strong, unrelenting feeling that i have a very narrow path to tread before people begin speculating on the different ways that i'm actually somehow fucked up or weird in an unlovable way, but as long as i tread lightly then i can toe the line.

of course, my life has improved since then because they split when i was a preteen (#aayyyy) but it did last long enough to do damage...

(otherwise how else do you explain trying to always "lose people's trail on you", when you feel like theyre onto stuff going on in your head? Trying to maintain the image people have of you, so they dont fall apart at how disgusting you actually are, or instead start drawing uncomfortable connections that will lead to them to that realization anyway? “Finding out”? Finding out what? Who the fuck knows by now! but theyre gonna find me out! and then theyre gonna hate me!)

Results?

For at least a decade and a half everyone has been “Going to Find It Out” about me and i have no fucking clue what that means anymore. because ive already come out and transitioned n shit, and ive been fine for it. that was like my biggest secret for a while. But that feeling of people i care about "finding out" is real enough to keep me from doing anything! (other than hrt cause i woulda literally have offed myself if i had to live even 5 more years as a guy... so thank fuck for the support yknow lol cause otherwise i would have figured out some DIY shit under the table by then. but other, more surface level pursuits still feel off the table, because they are not motivated by literal death if i dont do them in time.)

But its like... the damage is already done.

ive got a supportive family. even the worst of most of them have come around.

But those mental patterns are Mine now. Those thoughts are not theirs to take back anymore.

I have internalized those years of uncomfortable treatment into my own mind and how i work. thats on me now, and im trying to explore and help myself now and its hard.

So make sure to constantly tell your kids that you would love them even if they turned into a fuckin slug. And more importantly, that you accept them and promote them for everything they want to stand for even if you dont agree. Cause MAN, even for maybe not intending to do anything wrong、that shit influenced and ruined every interaction and decision in my life since! Theres no taking that back, even if done on accident through just being a goober parent influenced by current social norms! So imagine doing that level of harm on purpose!

You will create a kid that doesnt have to wonder on the extent of the bounds of how much they will be loved, they will KNOW those bounds. They will feel those bounds in every decision they make and every choice they consider. They will know FOR SURE that they will not be loved for themselves、and that will be on YOU.

and a word of advice, love their potential too... love their choices and their visions and the people they look up to. Cause people change. They are designed to.

you cant just love someone for who they are now and not those other things、or they will be stuck in trying to be that person for life.

And to anyone who reads this who knows me, hi! If this says anything about me as a person, then good! It should!

I think that my mid 20s are going to be some of the most intense self reflection ive had yet, and hopefully that actually goes somewhere unlike how it never does. so forgive, me voices and memories, for becoming someone who i like and who the people i hate don't.

[cielospeaks]

sometimes i think abt kasumiverse b6 and how wholesome post b6 storyline would be of em finally having people who treat her decently and nurture her for once in her fkin life like these are my ocs in a story i keep procrastinating writing why am i getting so emo abt this

[2jaeh]

INSUFFERABLE l  KIM DOYOUNG 

GENRE: mature theme, slight smut

WARNINGS: choking, dom themes, cursing

asshole! Doyoung , enemies to ???

Words : 4k 

You’re put in a group project with the most annoying pretentious jerk your law class had to offer. Immediately Doyoung tries to boss you around but you being you, you weren’t taking his shit...soon enough he finds out he can dominate you after all...in a very different way. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Theres no fucking way...no fucking way” you groaned looking at your group project list, eyes narrowing on possibly the worst people within your course year. Slumping in your seat you half smiled at the girl who approached you, one of your fellow members from project hell. 

“Heyyy y/n I think we're in a group together” she grinned and took a seat next to you, flipping her red hair over her shoulder and checked herself out in her mirror covered cellphone. 

Dami was probably the most narcissistic person you'd ever met and being in law, it was definitely a common trait around here. Dami sat up and began tapping you on your shoulder frantically “He’s in our group! Kim Doyoung is in our group” the two of you watched as the dark haired man conversed with the lecturer, casually turning back to look at the table where you guys sat, in annoyance. 

“That guy is such a prick” a guy who slid in the desk behind you, Seungmin said and Dami nodded in agreeance as you all continued to watch him. 

“Ive never really spoken to him before” you cocked your head, “What’s so annoying about him?” 

This time another group member joined in, a quieter girl who normally sat in the back Jisoo, cleared her throat, “He is really bossy and only likes to do things his own way.”

‘Well he is about to meet his worst nightmare’ you thought knowing nothing pissed you off more than someone telling you what to do. 

The muffled conversations around you began to soften as you felt someone stand over you and drop a file on your desk. Looking up, you locked eyes with the one and only Kim Doyoung, dressed in his usual black slacks, black turtleneck and clear rimmed spectacles. He raised his eyebrow at you as if you were supposed to guess what he wanted.

“What ?” you challenged him, folding your arms across your chest and returned an eyebrow raise. 

Doyoung sighed in annoyance, his long slender fingers moved across the file and opened it swiftly, “I want you to do roll call” he said coldly. 

A lump formed in your throat. You felt like you were being talked down to, it was something that infuriated the hell out of you. He wasn't older than you, nor was he getting better grades than you but somehow he had a superiority complex. Dami quickly nudged you and you rolled your eyes, “Seungmin ?”

“Here!” 

“Jisoo ?” you placed a tick as you called out each name. 

“Dami, Jangjun…?” you looked around and noticed that the usually loud comedic relief in your classroom was nowhere to be seen. 

“I think Jangjun is late, i’ll text him” Seungmin sighed and pulled out his phone. You turned back to the roll call sheet and pursed your lips, “Kim Doyoung ?” 

Doyoung just looked down at you, sucking in his bottom lip and raised that damn eyebrow at you again. 

“You need to say ‘here’ do you not know how roll call works ?” you tested him and he rolled his eyes and sighed, “here.” 

You smiled to yourself, completely satisfied with pissing him off when your internal celebration was interrupted by an out of breath Jangjun, who threw his bag on the floor and took a seat on Dami’s desk. Doyoung looked at him disgustingly, and even though you too were obviously annoyed by Jangjun’s tardiness, was that reaction really necessary ?

“Be on time” Doyoung sneered and grabbed the roll call file making his way back to the lecturer. 

“Fuck Kim Doyoung is in this group ?” Jangjun groaned, sharing the sentiments of the entire meeting. You couldnt believe these were the people you had to work with for the week. It's like you could almost feel an outburst waiting to happen, whether it be from you or Kim Doyoung. 

Doyoung returned and took out his phone, not really looking at any of you as he spoke, “we should make a group chat to update each other on work”

The group hastily shared each other's details and Doyoung created the chat and pinned a set of three rules. 

The first was the group was strictly to be used for the project, no small talk or any other messages that weren't related to the project. The second rule was that no one talks about the group content in private chats as it will cause confusion among members. Lastly you weren't allowed to message after 9pm unless it was an emergency, a very serious emergency. 

“Dang is this the military ?” Jangjun snickered as Seungmin and Dami tried their best to hide their laughs. It was typical of people like Dami and Jangjun to not take anything seriously. Their families were well off and they were just studying just for a piece of paper you call a degree. Doyoung couldn't even hide his annoyance, not like he ever did but he seemed particularly pissed off today. 

“Look, just follow the rules and all of you get a free pass and then we never have to speak to each other again” Doyoung spat and made his way to the exit leaving the rest of you in utter shock. 

———

The first two days were utter hell as Doyoung tried to take control of almost every aspect of the project and frankly you didn't even mind because his business proposal was flawless, it was just the way he spoke to all of you that drove you insane. 

“Dami its not fucking rocket science all you need to do is make a clientele spreadsheet with the mock list the professor gave us” Doyoung didnt even lift his head from his laptop, unaware of the impact his words had on her. 

Dami pushed away from the desk and her eyes began to well up and before you knew it she was running out of the library, with Jisoo and Seungmin following quickly out of concern. 

“Nice move asshole” you rolled your eyes, continuing to work on your laptop. 

Doyoung peered up and pushed his spectacles up, “what was that?” 

“I said nice move asshole, do you intend to talk to your future clients like that?” He initiated a different kind of anger from you but you managed to keep your cool. Doyoung shrugged as if what he had said to Dami had not carried any weight and continued typing away. 

A few minutes of the members disappearance quickly turned to an hour and Doyoung’s nonchalance about the whole ordeal really ticked you off to the point of slamming your laptop closed and pushed back from the desk. 

Doyoung quirked his eyebrow at you, “Is something wrong ?” 

“Is something wrong” you mimicked him, “Jangjun hasn't come in today because you sent him on multiple errands, and you just made Dami cry over something so ridiculous”

Doyoung sat back in his seat and rubbed his temples, “They're all freeloaders, you and I are the only ones doing work, why do you care so much about them?” 

“Basic human fucking decency maybe?” you groaned and ran your fingers through your hair, “listen im not like them, i'm not gonna take shit from you”

“Sure”

“Youre a fucking asshole Kim Doyoung.” 

—-

You lay in bed and replayed that scene with Doyoung in your head multiple times. He was so unbothered by your antics nor did he care about anyone's feelings within the group. He was cold, heartless all he thought about was himself. His cold expression was practically engraved in your head, spending all these hours with him was really not your favourite pastime. 

Group 7 gc 7:00pm

KDY: I posted a schedule for tomorrow we will be working in pairs on the highlighted sections. 

You took a look at his document and groaned when you saw your name placed next to his. There was no way, no way in hell you want to work with him one on one. Not caring about breaking his rule, you pulled up a private chat with him and began expressing your concerns. 

y/n  x  KDY : 7:10pm 

Y/N: Hi, there's no fucking way in hell am I working with you. Change It. 

KDY: I said no private chats and no, I'm not changing it. 

Y/N: Wouldn't it be better for us to split and have the others actually DO work for once ?

KDY: I barely gave them room for error, we're going to be the most anyway and besides, I'd prefer someone who can handle...my personality. 

Y/N: …..so you agree..you are an asshole ?

KDY: I give people a reality check that's all..

Y/N: whatever makes you sleep at night...can I atleast choose our work venue because If I were stuck in a library again with you I might kill you. 

KDY: haha..

KDY: sure. 

Y/N: mango drop cafe, 10am. 

KDY: cool, see you then. 

‘Haha’. You had no idea why that text in particular riled you up. Did he find all of this amusing ? Was he making everyone's life a living hell because he enjoyed it ? You stared at his messages and somehow ended up on his profile picture. He was leaning against a railing dressed in all black with his hooded eyes concentrated on the camera lense, Your realization of how attractive he was came from the fact that you stared at the picture for a good 20 minutes. You wondered who took the picture, a girlfriend maybe ? You shook your head. He seemed too uptight to be getting laid. You sighed, closing your phone and awaited yet another day with the insufferable gorgeous man that was Kim Doyoung. 

You arrived quite early at the cafe but of course Doyoung was here before you, already typing away at his laptop, in his usual attire. You greeted the barista and placed an order for a chilled cafe latte before making your way over to him. 

“Hey” you said simply and took a seat opposite him in the booth. Doyoung’s ears perked up at the sound of your voice and made room for your books on the table.

“You're here early” 

“You're already picking a fight with me?” you said casually setting up your workspace. 

Doyoung chuckled under his breath and shook his head, “I just didn't expect you this early y/n it's not that serious.” 

You ignored his words and got straight to work, not in the mood to play his little game. You felt Doyoung look at you a few times. You weren't sure if it were to check if youre doing the right thing or he was just looking at you. 

“Well i'm done with my part” you stretched your arms above your head and yawned. 

“Yeah I'm pretty much done too, Do you want another cup of coffee ?” Doyoung offered pointing to your empty cup. You were taken back by his softer demeanor but quickly nodded, “uh yeah sure.” 

Doyoung returned carrying a tray of two fresh cups of coffee and a slice of cheesecake. Setting everything down he handed you the extra fork and placed the cheesecake in the middle of the table to make it easier to share. 

“H-how much do I owe you ?” You fumbled in your bag for your wallet. 

“It's okay, it's my treat” Doyoung replied, placing a piece of cheesecake in his mouth and slowly licking the fork clean. You gulped as his tongue darted out carefully licking the cream from the metal, not leaving any residue behind. You had no idea what the hell was going on but you felt hot, almost claustrophobic. 

“You're okay?” Doyoung asked innocently, unaware of what he was doing to you. 

“Why are you being...nice?” You questioned, knitting your eyebrows together as the man continued to act as if this was his usual behavior. 

Doyoung pursed his lips and placed the fork on the plate, “You want me to be mean to you?”

“No I just don't get-”

“I apologized to Dami and she told me she only overreacted because the guy she likes, Seungmin was there” Doyoung explained and removed his spectacles, “she was embarrassed to ask anyone for help, I paired them up for today.”

“Wait wha-”

“Also Jangjun works at the campus radio” Doyoung continued, “I had only found out the day we all met, I gave him tasks that will allow him more flexibility, that way he doesn't have to join group sessions often.” 

You blinked, unable to form any words in order to reply to Doyoung. Especially after he chuckled at your speechlessness, knowing you didn't bother getting his side of the story at first. 

“You were right y/n I dont have to be an asshole all the time, I just like to get my work done” He shrugged. You kept eye contact with him but somehow it felt as if he were still toying with you, waiting on your next reaction. He seemed like he played this game often, making sure he always had the upper hand. Doyoung seemed relaxed as he stared at you, taking another scoop of the cheesecake and slowly ran his tongue over his lips after his bite. What the fuck was he doing ? 

“Y/N ?” you heard a familiar voice come from the entrance of the cafe. Your attention diverted from Doyoung to the blonde haired boy who began approaching your table. 

“Jungwoo ? oh my God what are you doing here ?” You stood up and pulled him into a tight hug and pecked his cheek. Doyoung shifted awkwardly in his seat as he watched your exchange with the stranger. 

“I got off early from class about to go to Subway, are you still doing that group project thing?” Jungwoo looked over at your table and half smiled at Doyoung who tried to distract himself with his phone. 

“Uh yeah but i'm all done here I think, wanna hang out ?” you hooked arms with Jungwoo as he nodded enthusiastically. You turned around and scratched the back of your head, 

“So...uh”

“Were all done you can go, I have somewhere to be anyway” Doyoung smiled as you slowly began packing up your things. 

“Alright, see you tomorrow I guess” you bid your goodbye and headed out for lunch with Jungwoo. 

—-

You had just finished up your skincare routine and caught up with a few instagram posts when you noticed Doyoung had followed you. Sitting up in bed you scrolled through his feed curiously. Every post was aesthetically pleasing and he looked absolutely hot in every single one of them. He had to have a girlfriend right ? No guy posts pictures this good without women flooding his DMs. 

There was no harm in doing the same since he was in your class, you decided to return the follow and close the app. Suddenly your phone vibrated with a new message in your chats. 

Y/N X KDY  10:30pm

KDY: hey 

Y/N: aren't you breaking two of your rules right now ?

KDY: haha 

KDY: I didn't realize what time it was…

Y/N: ….anyways..is this about work at least ?

KDY: kinda… you left one of your books at the cafe. I have it with me. 

Y/N: oh… thank you.

KDY: no prob...oh I hope its not a problem I added you on ig

Y/N: no its okay we are friends I guess

KDY: haha I thought I was the insufferable asshole..

Y/N: you are...but not all the time. Look im sorry for saying shitty things about you. 

KDY: its all good. 

KDY: …….

Y/N: ..whats up?

You twirled your fingers as you watched the three dots from Doyoung pop up and disappear over and over again. What was taking him so long ? 

KDY: that guy….that you met at the cafe..is he your boyfriend ?

Y/N: Jungwoo ? no way we've been friends since high school.

KDY: oh..

Y/N:....why would you even ask that ?

KDY: curious. 

Y/N: curious about who I'm dating ??

KDY: A little. 

You frowned at your phone and noticed Doyoung had changed his profile picture to a selfie. The picture was..something alright. You bit down on your lip as you enlarged the picture, which showed a wet haired Doyoung with his head resting in his palm and his long index finger was placed between his plump lips. 

“Fuck y/n get yourself together” you gave yourself a pep talk before opening his chat back up again. 

Y/N X KDY  10.54PM

Y/N: fine if you can ask a question can I ask one..

KDY: go ahead 

Y/N: who do you keep thirst trapping for ?

KDY: ….haha thirst trapping ? 

Y/N: Yeah who do keep posting these hot pics for huh

KDY: …..

KDY: You think i'm hot ?

Fuck. Why did you word it that way. You groaned immediately regretting sending that message but something in you was so curious about him you decided to just risk it, what was the worst that could happen ? 

Y/N: well yeah, I mean I'm sure everyone thinks you're attractive, you seem to know it too. 

KDY: wow. 

KDY: I think you're hot too. 

What the hell was going on. You felt your face heat up and you placed your pillow in between your legs as you turned on your side. 

KDY: I was almost disappointed when I thought Jungwoo was your boyfriend, he's way too passive. 

Y/N: ...and what makes you think you know what kind of man I need ?

KDY: hmmm

KDY: first of, with that fucking attitude of yours..A dominate one. 

You swallowed hard as you felt a tingle in your stomach, squeezing your thighs together on the pillow to create more friction. 

Y/N: I could say the same for you. 

KDY: You may think youre dominate in many aspects...but when it comes to fucking..im the one in charge. 

God you hated how hot that sounded. He had you in the palm of his hand through text. You were a mess and he wasn't even the room to fuel it. You wanted him so fucking bad it was insane. 

Y/N: running your mouth doesn't equate to doing it you know...

KDY:.....

KDY: then would you like me to show you ?

Everything happened so damn fast. One minute you two were texting the next minute you were sharing your apartment location and Doyoung was on his way over. You scrambled to put on sexier underwear and do your hair, still in shock by the fact that Doyoung was on his way over to bang you. 

You jumped when you heard the doorbell and realized it was him. Opening the door you were greeted to a very different look of Doyoung. His hair was messy and reached his eyes. Instead of his usual black academic attire he wore a loose white vest that showed off his toned chest and arms, along with a pair of grey sweatpants. 

“Hi” Doyoung smirked, his eyes were dark as he scanned your figure. 

“Hi” you responded, leaning against the wall in the hallway and looked up at him. Doyoung slowly approached you, like a lion circling its prey. His slender fingers danced lightly along your body, drawing a line from your waist until he found your throat and wrapped his cold fingers around it. He bit down on his lip as he studied how perfectly his hand looked around it and squeezed gently, smirking after hearing a soft moan emit from you. 

“I want you to do as I say, any back chat from you will get you punished you got that ?” he brought his lips down to your neck and exhaled. 

You nodded in response but that wasn't good enough for Doyoung. You felt his squeeze on your throat once more and he used his hips to pin you against the wall, “use your words” he gritted his teeth. 

“Yes sir” you replied obediently, and felt him smile against your neck. 

“Good girl, and if i'm too rough let me know so I can stop okay ?” he replied, his voice changed and it was much sweeter and genuine than before. He placed a soft kiss on your cheek when you nodded and led you to the bed. 

Doyoung lay you on the bed, already stripping off his shirt and ordered you to undress yourself and rid him off his sweatpants. You bit down on your lip taking notice of how aroused he was when you palmed his member. 

Doyoung watched you through hooded eyes as you discarded his sweatpants and boxers. He softly patted your head and grabbed a tuft of your hair in order to make you look up at him. 

“Spit” he ordered, and held out his hand and you did as you were told. You watched as he lathered himself with it, moaning as he stroked himself. He was so damn sexy, biting down on lip and slowly pleased himself as you watched. 

“Do you want this inside you sweetheart ?” he cooed and placed a finger under chin. 

You nodded quickly, “Yes please” 

“What do you want me to do baby ?” He purred and hovered over you as you lay on the bed, breathing heavily as his fingers moved against your warm skin, tracing your curves, ghosting over your heat and returning back to your lips to insert a digit inside. 

Doyoung watched diligently as you sucked on his finger like the good girl he knew you were. He finally pulled his finger out and with one swift movement entered with his member before you could even respond to his question. You moaned as he quickly slammed his hips into yours, wasting no time in gaining a rhythm as you marked his back with scratch marks feeling as though you were on a high. 

Doyoung fucked you like a pro, wasting no time to switch positions and had you on all fours, slapping your ass before slamming into you again, that pretentious smirk forming on his face as he heard your whimpers asking him for more. 

“Are you ready to cum sweetheart ?” he asked, pulling you up as his strokes became slower and tugged on your ear with his teeth. 

“Y-yes yes i'm ready” you panted.

“What's the magic word ?” he growled as he grabbed your throat and slowed down his pace as you were nearing your climax. 

“Fuck youre so annoying PLEASE, please let me cum Doyoung fuck” 

Doyoung chuckled and picked up his pace until you finally climaxed and he followed shortly after, collapsing in the bed next to you. 

“You have such an attitude God” he rolled his eyes playfully, bringing the blanket over your bodies and grinned when you moved in to cuddle him. 

“I guess you will have to fix that some time” you yawned and wrapped your arm around his waist, “but I have to admit, maybe I do enjoy the insufferable Kim Doyoung bossing me around once in a while.”

[nagisa-shiota-worthy-shit]

Tinder Matches

Karmagisa Week 2021, day 1 prompt: Matching  wordcount: 1600

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The fact that Nagisa had a tinder account wasn’t something he really shared with anyone. At the time, he’d created it as a joke, a way of amusing his friend’s stupid suggestion. According to Kayano, it truly could be the solution to his lack of experience in the love life department. Nagisa hadn’t been too sure about that. He was more than aware of the application’s status and, no, he wasn’t really interested in finding people to just have sex with. 

Yet, somehow, he still found himself swiping through people on the app one night. He was alone in his room, a little bored, and perhaps even a little too tired after a day’s worth of teaching. None of the people he came across really interested him much, although he had to admit that he’d probably give them a shot if he saw them in real life, just because he wanted to believe in the best in people. 

This app, however, gave little to no information on someone’s personality. Then again, some people were very clear about looking for someone rich to provide for them, which Nagisa guessed his teacher’s salary wasn’t exactly right for, and he supposed that also said something about their personality and what they were like in a relationship. Nothing Nagisa really wished to deal with. 

After swiping left on complete strangers in fear of one secretly being a stalker, murderer, or just having horrible table manners, he suddenly stopped when a familiar face popped up on his screen. the red hair, the golden eyes, that all too familiar smirk. Nagisa recognized exactly who he was seeing, yet somehow couldn't exactly process the idea. it just didn't seem entirely right. 

Someone like Karma wouldn't need to use tinder, right? 

He found himself staring at the title picture for a while before he realized he could scroll through and see more. it wasn't like he didn't know what karma looked like... but... he sure was curious about what karma was putting out there. 

It didn't appear to be all that special at first. A selfie in a casual outfit, a picture of him at a bar with people Nagisa didn't recognize, a traveling picture, but the last picture was something else. This picture appeared professionally taken, or at the very least it wasn't a selfie and the picture was set up. Karma was posing in it, after all. Posing in a suit, the jacket in his hand, thrown over his shoulder as he glanced at the camera with those devilish eyes. Nagisa was nothing but taken back by it. 

He shouldn't be staring, should he? This was his close friend and fellow assassin graduate, the staring was just weird. Yet, somehow, he couldn't look away from the picture and thought back to when he’d first met Karma, so many years ago now. He’d felt the same sense of awe back then. Karma was just so perfect, how couldn’t he. This picture, him as an adult looking like a literal model, was like a visual representation of everything Nagisa used to feel Karma was. 

The sudden noise of the train passing near his apartment woke him up from his state. suddenly turning very red, he frantically moved his hands and went to swipe left, except his phone nearly fell out of his hands in the process. He caught it, hands all over the screen and, through his own fingers, he could see Karma being swiped right. 

no. no nonono. please go back

Nagisa fumbled with his phone, hoping to undo his actions, but before he could do anything, a message popped up on the screen. He was surprised by it to say the least. 

‘you've got a match’

A match. He matched. but that meant... Karma had swiped right on him as well?! why would he- probably as a joke. he probably came across nagisa and thought it was funny, right? Nagisa had to assume that was the truth, although deep in his mind a thought echoed around saying the exact opposite. Maybe he wanted it to not be a joke.

After panicking for a hot minute, his phone made a ping sound, indicating he’d gotten a message. He was too scared to look. Somehow, before even opening the message, he could already sense who it was from. Sure enough, once he finally did gather the courage to check the notification, his fears were proven right. This was the worst situation. 

Karma: well well well, didnt take you as the tinder type

He considered ignoring it. What was that called again? Ghosting? Yes, he could ghost Karma. If he didn’t respond to the message, perhaps nothing else unfavourable would be happening. Well, Karma would probably mention it to him the next time they spoke in real life. That would probably be even worse. It wasn’t like he could ignore Karma for the rest of his life. It wasn’t like he wanted to. 

Nagisa: i'm not

Karma: yet here you are.

Karma: swiping right on me ;)

The cockiness almost oozed out of the message. Nagisa was left frowning at his phone. The main thought going through his mind was that Karma was probably enjoying this. He was a sadist like that. He was having fun while Nagisa wanted to bury himself as deep underground as possible. 

Nagisa: you swiped right first! 

Nagisa: mine was an accident

Nagisa: I was surprised to see you on here and my phone dropped

Karma: ah, so you wouldn't swipe right on me :( am I too ugly?

Nagisa felt his face grow hot. He probably shouldn't look at his reflection if he wanted to save himself from the image of his head being a tomato. He didn't think karma was ugly. quite the opposite, actually. Not that he could say that. That would be weird. So, he tried to find some middle ground answer, not calling karma ugly or the opposite of that. 

Nagisa: I never said that, I just didn't intend to swipe right on someone i'm already friends with. 

There, no way that could be taken wrong. He considered sending an additional message, clarifying just how dropping his phone led to the swiping right, but decided against it. It would sound just a little too defensive. 

Karma: well,its nice this gives us a chance to talk again anyways. appears youve been too busy to answrr my texts. 

An awkward laugh escaped Nagisa as he looked away from his phone, forgetting Karma couldn't actually see his reaction. There was no reason to avoid eye contact when there was no eye contact to begin with. Still, he shared the sentiment. He kind of had forgotten to keep contact with people lately. 

He blamed the new workplace. After finishing his days as a trainee, the new school he worked at was surprisingly more demanding. He always knew being a full time teacher was a lot of work, especially now that there was no one to keep an eye on him and remind him of certain teaching specifics of the school he taught at. Of course, the work was rewarding enough for him to barely think about his loss of contacts. He had a habit of treating those too loosely anyways. 

Nagisa: ive just been working

Karma: workaholic

Nagisa: you literally have more work hours than me

Karma: and somehow you still spend as much time working as me. 

The conversation went on like that for a bit, them going back and forth at each other. Overall, it wasn't a bad time. Nagisa kind of forgot about the actual use of the app, and the fact that he could just DM Karma on line whenever he wanted to, until Karma managed to bring back the conversation to it. 

Karma: you know, usually when people match, they try to meet up for a date

Of course Nagisa was aware that that's what the app was for, it was sort of the reason he’d gotten it as well. However, he didn't think anything would lead anywhere for him, let alone with karma. surely karma wasn't being serious. it would be weird to go on a date with your friend. 

and still, Nagisa endulged him, being so stupid as to ask further. 

Nagisa: where do people even go on tinder dates?

Karma: anywhere they want to, usually just for drinks, easy way to lead them home a little tipsy afterwards

Nagisa: okay that sounds creepy

Karma: if that's not your style I could always take you out for dinner. 

Karma: There's this new sushi restaurant near my place, looks like something you'd love. 

somehow, he actually considered it. On any other day, that would sound insane to nagisa. Since when would he consider dating karma? Wait, not dating, going on a date with Karma. There was a difference. Sushi did sound great, and so did Karma's company. He supposed he hadn't really been out like that in a while. date or not. 

Karma: i can even pick you up, very romantic 

The word hit Nagisa a little hard. Romantic. What would that entail? Would they sit opposite of each other, send cute glances, maybe even hold hands beside the table? He wanted his mind to hate the idea of that, doing those things with his friend, ruining the relationship they already had. But, he also wanted to give in, say yes, and see where things would lead. At the very least, he'd have a fun night with good food. 

Nagisa: you have a day in mind?

Karma: how's Saturday?

Nagisa: Saturday's fine

Karma: it's a date!

[corysmiles]

Youve ruined me, how dare you, I will never forgive you for your crimes!! /j ily your fine dont worry!!! Ill just rewrite it lol at least it wasnt a whole list of hcs.

So a fluff for boo and an angst for bur,

Ranboo thought Tubbo was just joking when he talked about stealing his shirts when he came to visit. Then he found out Tubbo thought he was bigger then him this whole time, and he fully intended to do so before figuring out he was tiny. To make up for it Ranboo would steal Tubbos hoodies instead, using them as beds and the big pocket on the front as a blanket. It was like cat rules where when the small creature chooses to use something as a bed, you cant move them its not allowed. But Tubbo is chaos incarnate, he will just pick them up and put them on with Ranboo still in the pocket. Sometimes he'll turn them inside out first so Ranboo cant escape the pocket until Tubbo lets him out.

Wilbur was climbing a charging cord plugged into a phone instead of just asking for a lift up onto the table, it was effortless for him he does this kind of thing all the time. Tommy didnt notice him ans accidentally bumped the phone while doing things on the table, knocking it over the edge juuuuust enough that the cord cant support Wilburs weight anymore. Tommy hears his shout of surprise when the phone falls off the table taking the cord and him with it, and managed to catch Wilbur before he hits the ground. But he doesnt manage to stop the phone from falling on tine and it lands on Wilbur knocking him in the head pretty hard. Whether its enough for injury is up to you~

-❤ anon

Thank you so much I love you my friend and your writing is amazing as always 💙💙💙💙💙 :] I would like to give you platonic hugs (or hand holding) if you’d like, I think you’re very very awesome

I can’t get over Tubbo just putting on his hoodies anyway, he acts annoyed but he really loves how the tiny is like his own personal body heater. And Ranboo thinks it’s really comfy too, it’s comforting being so close he can hear Tubbo’s breaths.

For the Wilbur one I’d like to say he is injured but nothing serious >:] Maybe his nose starts bleeding or he gets a black eye from the phone- nothing that won’t heal but Tommy would feel so guilty. He’s so used to Wilbur acting human that he forgets how fragile the tiny actually is. Of course he knows that Wilbur isn’t glass but times like that make him realizes that he does need to be careful around his small friend. He tries to not be super overbearing with Wilbur but the more he sees how dangerous life is for the tiny the more he wants to just scoop him up in his hands and hold him

[heyitsyn]

Put A Ring On It

a/n: lmao tooru would actually beat your booty if you ever date kags

anon request:  hii can i have a hc like the oikawa sister reader x iwa but now with kageyama?? like the reader is literally the princess of seijoh and never liked anyone until he met kags?? tysm! u make such a cute ff

requests open!!

he might not smile much but when he does, its the most beautiful smile I've ever seen

king and queen of the court??

lmao im getting chills

so since tooru went to kitagawa, it would be natural for him to want his baby sister to go there too right?

you are actually 2 years younger than tooru so that would make you about kags’ age

you are well-known throughout the school as oikawa tooru’s little sister and people also flocked to you since you got the good genes as well

but you were never interested in fear that they would take advantage of you for your brother or to just parade you as a trophy

anyways

you liked volleyball like your brother but you didnt want to play in a team so you just went to their practices to help the coaches

youve heard about this prodigy setter named kagayama tobio, who was also the grandson of a known volleyball couch

but youve only heard bad things about him

tooru lit rally comes home ranting and complaining about this new kid who is great at setting and you were just like, ‘okay and?’

‘y/n-chan! theres an outsider threatening to take your brother’s place! aren’t you worried for me?!’

‘nii-chan, its just volleyball’

‘just-just volley-! that’s it im disowning you’

while iwa just watches from the sidelines

oikawa just shouting and yelling in front of the fridge while you sit on the barstool while eating a banana, looking unbothered

keeping up with the oikawas part 2

you kinda knew him because kindaichi, who is your classmate, talked about kageyama, who was in kunimi’s class

‘tooru-nii never shuts up about him’

you complained to kindaichi one day

‘is he really that good?’

you knew the talent you brother had and the hard work he puts in volleyball as you were usually the one who woke up at night to help him with his knee pains

so you slightly understood his threatened feeling of this mysterious prodigy who just suddenly enters the team

‘he’s not terrible. maybe its because theyre the only setters in the team so oikawa-senpai is threatened about his position being taken’

‘but as long as he’s not a starting, then no foul done right?’

wrong

unfortunately, you were there to see tooru break down during practice when kageyama asked him how to serve

since you usually walked home with your brother and iwa-chan,

get yourself protective brothers

you were forced to wait until he was done with practice

captain duties and all that

and you were getting tired of just waiting in the cold so you go in the gym to tell off your nii-chan when you see him raise his hand at this tobio boy

‘iwa-chan!’

you shriek and he was able to stop tooru from hitting their underclassman

‘oi! oikawa tooru!’

kageyama looked horrified and was so scared that he dashed off

ngl, you felt bad for him and you knew that your brother was probably just overwhelmed w the incoming interhighs and he was just getting frustrated

so when iwa nodded at you that he got tooru, you went after kageyama, who was tossing the ball up in the air

he tossed it up once, expecting it to come back down but you snatched it right up

he turned to see a girl who looked exactly oikawa-san and he backed away

you saw him step back and you pouted

‘ehhh~? am i that scary to you, kage-chan?’

omg the way you even talk was like him

‘are you oikawa-senpai’s sister?’

hes heard little about you from kunimi

you nodded and gave him a smile before sticking a hand out

‘oikawa y/n, at your service’

‘ah, k-kageyama tori-bio’

you giggled at his flustered look 

‘what is it? torio? tobio?’

ofc you already knew but he was so cute to tease

‘i-it’s tobio’

he was red at the embarrassment of messing up his own name but you thought he was so cute and a bean

you heard from kunimi that he wasnt very social and mostly keeps to himself or the volleyball team

‘sorry about my nii-chan, kage-chan. hes just stressed right now. dont worry, he’ll come around. i’ll make it up to you in his place, okay?’

your eyes scrunched up as you smiled to try and diffuse the situation and save your brother’s arse

he owes you

‘its okay. its also my fault for pestering him about it so i should apologize’

omg this boy is ADORABLE

DLKAFDKLJAFALSFEJISLKDJ

‘tobio-chan!’

you shrieked before hugging him and nuzzling your face into his shirt

‘youre so sweet! you dont have to do anything!’

he was actually taken aback by your expressive personality and wasnt used to being fawn upon, especially by a cute girl

he remained frozen on the spot and you worriedly let go, thinking he stopped breathing

‘tobio-chan? did you die?! tobio-chan!’

from then on, you just seemed to see him everywhere

for months you didnt even know this boy but suddenly, after the accident, you were just seeing him everywhere

from your classroom, you’d see him at the yard with kunimi and kindaichi as they toss the ball around

i will always think that this trio were initially friends at the beginning!

he seemed to be a very shy boy and was constantly trying to keep his emotions on check

but you saw the smiles whenever he thinks the two arent looking

that was probably why you absolutely had the biggest crush on this boy

but you didnt realize that you had a crush on him

you just wanted to help him come out of his shell and help him smile more bc it was so beautiful

so you cornered him by his locker one day and your cute smile made his cheeks go on fire

‘FIREEE~~~~ BULTORUNE!!’

‘tobio-chan! i want to be your friend!’

he was SHOOK

girls never really talked to him, much less his frightening captain’s cute sister

no words came from him as he just looked at you with wide eyes 

‘o-oikawa-san?’

you pouted at the formal use of your name

‘haaa?! tobiio-chan! call me by some cute nickname too~!’

you crossed your arms and stomped your foot on the floor

omg no stop this at once little girl

he turned even redder and quickly stuffed his things in his bag before dashing off

‘eh?! tobio-chan!’

his days were filled with that

you were constantly yelling his nickname with a smile when you would see him and he would blush then run away 

even during practice, you would basically act as their manager by giving them their towels and water

but it was obvious that you would pamper kageyama more

that irritated your brother

he dragged you home one day and was basically interrogating you

‘n/n-chan, youre not having a crush on that bastard kageyama are you?’

you glared at your brother, offended at the way he called tobio

‘don’t call him that, nii-chan! i will hit you!’

you shrieked and punched his gut

‘HES NOT GOOD FOR YOU, N/N-CHAN! HES A THIEF!’

tooru shouts and thus began the arguments between your fascination with kageyama

but you didnt care because you intend to uphold that promise and reach that goal through

all you wanted was to see tobio smile freely

one day, you were walking to school earlier than your brother when you saw kageyama at the intersection

your eyes lit up and you bounded up to him

‘tobio-chan!’

his eyes widened and he quickly turned around to walk away

ngl that hurted a bit

‘tobio-chan?’

that small voice made him stop and his head turned to look at your watering eyes

‘tobio-chan, do you not like me?’

you were so used to being liked and fawned over your entire life that the thought of somebody not liking you was so hurtful

maybe thats why you liked kageyama tobio though

he was focused on running away from you rather than going to you

for the first time, you would have to be the one who chased rather than being the one running

kags was worried bc his sister always told him to never make a girl cry and here he was, watching your eyes tear up

‘y/n-san, please dont cry’

you watched him walk to you and shakily wipe your tears away

a smile formed on your face at the touch of his fingertips and you hugged him

lmao we really bokuto 2.0

kags didnt know what to do bc if he hugged you back, that would give you a wrong impression of him wanting to be your friend

but he didnt want friends, he just wanted to play volleyball

but he smelled a faint strawberry scent from your hair and he unconsciously leans in, wrapping his arms around your body

at the feeling of him returning your affection, you giggled and tightened your arms around him while burying your face in his chest

‘do you want to be my friend now, tobio-chan?’

you were so insistent on being a friend that kageyama was touched at your efforts

he was just like

f it shes pretty and nice, its fine

he nodded

and thus began a cute friendship

well, more like a one-sided friendship since you were the more lively one than him

you would run to his classroom with kindaichi and eat with kags and kunimi

you would give him parts of your bento and you would hold his hand

thisgirl does not know personal space

one lunch period, you were all eating lunch when you were suddenly thirsty

you let go of kags and stood up, making the boys look at you

‘im thirsty so ill get something. want anything?’

they shrugged and told you to get whatever so you skipped to the vending machine

yall idontknow how to skip so i just kinda gallop

you got banana milk for you and random things for kindaichi and kunimi

but you didnt know what to get kags

you thought you would know since youve started being friends a few weeks ago but you really didnt know what drink he liked

so you chose the only blue thing they have

you went back to the classroom and gave their drinks but you sheepishly smiled when you gave kags his milk

‘i didnt really know what you liked so i got a blue carton because your eyes are blue and they reminded me of you’

kindaichi and kunimi gave you a disgusted look while kageyama blushed at the thought

this folks, is why kagellama tobiyolo is in love w that blue carton of milk

slowly but surely, kageyama has started opening up to you and you were so happy that he was starting to smile more around you

it took a few months but you were finally considered a friend

ofc tooru was deeply unhappy about this and always tried to foil plans between you and him but you were not having that

he was even harsher during practice but since youre always there, you would take a page from iwa’s book and yeet a ball to his face

‘i will hit you, nii-chan!’

it was a shock to the school that you were actually showing interest to someone since you rarely gave anybody else a second glance

and it was to this shy boy, kageyama tobio, no less!

when oikawa tooru has finally graduated, you breathed a sigh of relief 

you were bumped up to best friend by kageyama and you always walked home with him

iwa-chan liked you (in a brotherly, platonic way) enough that he would even keep tooru in his house so you could hang out with kageyama longer

also, kags has finally came up with a nickname for you and has finally called you by something informal!!

imsoproudofhimohmygosh

‘n/n-chan, my mom’s cooking tonkatsu tonight. you wanna come?’

he asked you one night and you nodded eagerly, excited at the mention of your favorite food

‘yes! you dont even have to ask!’

you hummed as you skipped down the road, still holding his arm, and excited to meet his family

but to kags, this was a way more serious affair

youve never met his family before and hes worried that they might embarrass him in front of this cute girl

and he was right

when they stepped in, his sister, who was back from college, peaked and saw her little anti-social baby brother with a really really cute girl

‘mom! tobio brought a girl home!’

he shuts his eyes in frustration but you squeezed his hands

‘dont be nervous, tobio-chan. im right here, okay?’

oml he doesnt deserve you

his mom was so excited that he even had a friend and quickly finished dinner

you bowed in front of his parents and sister before introducing yourself

‘hello, my name is oikawa y/n. its really nice to meet you and thank you for inviting me to your lovely home’

‘omg oikawa-chan is so nice! dig in, everyone!’

kageyama met the eyes of his family and his heart swelled at their approval

it made him like you more

waitt, like?

like, as in, romantic?

like as in, i like you more than a best friend?

like, as in, i want to be your boyfriend?

he choked at that last thought and you hurriedly gave him his water, patting his back

‘daijobu, tobio-chan?’

no luv, life is not daijobu right now

he nodded before sighing in relief

one look at your face and all the thoughts started happening again and he turned even redder

dear god, he actually had a crush on you

nah, itll go away

right?

nope

this is a fanfiction kags, youre meant to fall in love with us

at the passing of his grandfather, tobio was an actual wreck

an emotional, mental, and physical wreck

he skipped school and constantly practiced at the backyard and refused to eat his meals, wanting to stay outside with his ball longer

at his second day of absence, you went straight to his house and when his mom opened the door, she gave you a sad smile and pointed to the back

you saw him trying to do a serve only for him to miss and hit his head before shouting curses

never have you seen him miss a serve

you studied his appearance and your hands trembled

his eyes were red with even more red around his eyes, chapped lips from the constant biting and the bruised knuckles from probably punching something

the last time you saw him was at the funeral after he asked you to go with him and you were so worried that he would turn out like this

‘tobio’

you softly called out and he paused, not moving to get the ball

he heaved a wheeze before choking out a sob

you ran straight to him and gathered him in your arms, cradling the back of his head to your shoulder

throughout your friendship, tobio has never been so affectionate

but right now, you were the only thing that made everything seem normal and he held on to you, so afraid that you might disappear too

as if knowing his concerns, you ran your hands through his hair

‘sshhh, it’s okay. im right here. im not going anywhere, tobio. im right here, okay?’

even you were hurting

everything started because you thought he was beautiful when he smiled so you made it your mission to keep that smile alive forever

but when hes sobbing and in pain, it gives more value to that smile because underneath all that, he was just a shy little boy who had a passion of volleyball

you didnt want to say anything to him but everyone knew that he wasnt exactly the same tobio

if anything, he was much harder with himself and trained even harder

he was staying later in the gym and he was starting to snap at everyone, even kindaichi and kunimi

they got into a massive fight during practice and everyone went home angry but he stayed after, putting his frustrations into doing jumping serves

you watched from the sidelines and when you saw him fall, you rushed over and gently patted his face to get rid of his sweat

‘tobio-chan, let’s go home’

he shook his head

‘no! i need to perfect this-!’

‘tobio-chan, lets go home’

your voice became stronger and firm so he hung his head low

‘you dont understand, y/n. i need to be strong and i want to be the last standing on the court’

you flashed a crooked smile

‘did you forget who my brother is, tobio-chan? i suffered through it with nii-chan so im not going through it again, especially with you. so come on, lets go home’

everyone in the school became wary of the former shy boy who seems to glare at everything and everyone

you were even told, straight to your face, that you were wasting time being his friend

‘ne, y/n-chan. kageyama-kun is so mean so you should stay away from him, okay?’

you glared at them before slamming your book close

‘say one more word and i will shove this book down your throat so youll never be able to utter a single sound ever again’

go off sister!!

you stayed with kageyama, even if he got frustrated and got angry at you, but he was your best friend and youve been friends for years

and you still want to see his smile

tooru was practicing a lot again and your sister and takeru were at tokyo for a trip so you were home alone

so you texted kageyama that you were coming over and he didnt respond which you took as a sign of agreement

so at your trek to his house, you hummed as you swung the bag full of meat buns and cartons of milk when you saw your 3 friends

you were about to shout and raise your hand when you saw kindaichi harshly push kageyama back and kunimi separating the two

‘you-!’

kunimi saw you and hissed at the two

‘stop this right now. y/n-san is over there’

you shouldve known then that everything was falling apart

at this point, you were the only one he let in as his family was too afraid to push him too far

you should be happy, right?

he was smiling around you and only you

only you were able to see such a beautiful thing

but now,

you were not happy with the way he acted towards everybody

during that iconic game in his last year of middle school, he pushed you away too

the locker room was tense and kindaichi was about to yell at him when you knocked 

‘tobio-chan, can we talk?’

he wordlessly threw the towel down and hefted his bag before going outside to follow you

omg im getting flashbacks from my shirabu ff from yesterday

you grabbed his hand and pulled him in for a hug

youve given him many hugs before but this time, it was so strong and different than the others

his arms were around your shoulders while yours was around his torso due to your height and your head was leaning against the place where his heart would be

‘im going to seijoh, tobio-chan’

you paused, gauging his reaction

he didnt say anything, just keeping you in his arms

not iwa-level-bara arms but a healthy-muscular-arms

‘tooru-nii wants me to spend one more year with him before he goes to college and theyre saying my grades are enough to keep me there. but if you dont want me to go, i wont’

‘what? why wont you? its a good school and you deserve it’

his grumbles were still frustrated but he was rather calm whenever he talks to you

‘you wont miss me then, tobio-chan~?’

he could feel you pouting and that made him smile

‘i wont since youll come over to my house everyday’

you pulled your head away with mock surprise

‘everyday?! tobio-chan~! youll really miss me~!’

so you went your separate ways

but you spent every day of the summer together 

much to oikawa’s dismay

and during your first day, he was reluctant to let you go

for 3 years you walked together at the same direction to the same place

but now, youd have to part ways at the same intersection

you softly smiled and giggled when he refused to let go of your hand

im busting uwus just writing this yall

my fingers said ‘free reign!’

‘tobio-chan~! i’m going to be late~!’

you playfully whined and gently pulled your hand from his grasp

but he didnt let go, still holding your hand while the other was in his pants pocket

‘we should skip today, n/n. we can go get meat buns and popsicles and-’

you walked back to him and wrapped your arms around his torso, chin rested on his chest so you could look up to him

‘as much as i want to, my grades and attendance need to be high, tobio-chan~’

he scoffed, ruffling your hair

‘once i become a professional player, you wont need to work. i can support us by myself’

bruh hes already thinking they would get married or something

you scrunched your nose in distate

‘i want to make something of myself. i was given a life so im going to live it’

‘but that means spending less time with me and-’

‘tobio-chan, i know what youre doing. stop stalling and let me go to school already~!’

‘no!’

he refused and caged you in his arms while you wiggled and laughed

‘ill see you later! i promise! now i need to go or nii-chan will yell at you~!’

with great reluctance, he let you go to school, pouting and everything

that cute pout he has oml

as your figure became smaller the farther you walked, you turned around and saw him still standing there and when he saw you look at him, he raised a hand

you jumped and cupped your hands around your mouth

‘MISS YOU ALREADY TOBIO-CHAN!’

i reference my previous works constantly

pedestrians looked at you weirdly and looked at kageyama too causing him to get flustered and run to school, your laughter echoing behind him

seijoh was already expecting the arrival of oikawa’s cute little sister and once you appeared, woohoooo

you got your own fanclub of ladies and genitals

they flocked over to your desk after tooru and iwa dropped you off at your classroom during lunch

‘ne, oikawa-chan, do you see anyone cute today?’

‘iwaizumi-senpai is cute, dont you think?’

‘no! yahaba-senpai is cuter!’

‘matsukawa-senpai and hanamaki-senpai are not bad’

we have matsuhana rights in this household

but you remained quiet, focusing on your phone as kageyama complained to you about some tangerine looking fool

‘oikawa-chan!’

that caught your attention and you smiled gently

‘hm?’

they giggled at your rosy cheeks

‘she has a boyfriend, probably’

you shook your head

‘no. i dont’

‘well, do you have anyone you like?’

you thought about it and shrugged

‘ive never really liked anyone before. i dont care about having a boyfriend either since my brother and tobio are enough for me’

that traveled quickly and soon, everyone was trying their best to woo the little princess oikawa

from lunch suggestions to study dates,

they all wanted to be closer to you

but you always refused,

‘tooru-nii wants me to eat lunch with him’

‘im hanging out with tobio-chan after school’

‘iwa-chan doesnt like you so no’

lmao yes

you were famous around the school for the way everyone treated you and catered to your needs to gain your favor

exactly like a princess

the princess of aoba johsai

the princess of seijoh

she ruled the court alongside the Grand King Oikawa and everyone practically worshipped them

everyone wanted them to like them, just a little bit, but you remained closed off to romantic relationships

when tobio texted you about the upcoming seijoh practice match, you were bouncing on your heels in excitement as you waited for them in the gym

kindaichi and kunimi were rolling their eyes at you

the other members of the team knew of you and were confused at your behavior

‘her boyfriend’s on the karasuno team’

‘the king of the court’

‘eh?! boyfriend?!’

‘y/n-chan, can you hand me my bottle?’

he wasnt answered as you shrieked and sprinted straight to kageyama who appeared at the door

‘tobio-chan~!’

you launched yourself and latched yourself to him, tobio immediately supporting you

‘geez, n/n, not in front of everyone’

you giggled

‘i missed you so much, tobio-chan~!’

‘then transfer over’

‘i cant do that! you know that!’

everyone was S H O O K

‘is she,,,, your girlfriend, kageyama?’

daichi and suga asked but the boy turned red before shaking his head

‘my friend’

‘ehhh?! you have friends?!’

hinata shut up i swear-

you cheered him on despite being on the other team 

you got even louder when you saw your brother playing and he complained about your loyalties

‘you cheer on for your boyfriend but not your brother?! what is the meaning of this n/n-chan?!’

you rushed to give him a towel when he motioned you to do it for him like you always did

‘i want a girlfriend too’

‘we’re not dating you idiots!’

kageyama shouted from the sidelines to the orange hair kid

‘but you act like,,, that’

you smiled

maybe dating tobio wouldnt be a bad idea

i mean, hes cute, adorable, talented, funny, nice

you could deal with it

‘so youre syaing, we act like it already?’

you questioned towards the grey-haired guy who nodded

‘whaddya say, tobio-chan? should we hurry up and put a ring on it?’

he spluttered, almost choking on his water

‘r-r-RING?!’

‘well, you said youd support us in the future, right?’

‘i mean-yea-but’

‘okay then its settled’

both teams gawked at you while kageyama was too busy trying to not have a nosebleed or a heart attack by how fast his heart was beating

you turned to your brother who was looking like his entire world was crumbling

‘OI TOORU-NII! TOBIO-CHAN AND I ARE NOW DATING AND WE’RE GOING TO GET MARRIED!’

oikawa screamed

yall this is so long im--

[creacherkeeper]

im getting a little too in my family feels today and so INSTEAD of feeling those im just going to ramble for a second about why i fucking love paladin!aelwyn because. im. just like this i guess im coping leave me alone

cw for discussions of child abuse, maladaptive coping, drugs and alcohol, self harm, destructive tendencies, basically everything we see in canon and the implications

aelwyn is ... SO interesting to me because for as much of her interiority as we see, as much of her as we think we understand, as much as i could ramble about her character for hours, we know ALMOST NOTHING about her in actuality?? (besides ... one key thing)

(this is like 2k and probably incoherent someone please stop me)

okay. listen. almost everything we see aelwyn do in s1 is maladaptive rebellion against her parents and home life. the drinking, the drugs, the partying, perhaps some of kalvaxus (though i dont think we fully understand how much of that was forced on her as well, kalina WAS watching her when she was talking to adaine about it). you can say like, oh aelwyn is a party animal, she's impulsive, she makes risky decisions, she's bitchy and rude, and its like. okay but IS SHE ACTUALLY. because under her parents thumb she had an EXTREMELY limited amount of freedom, and usually when people are suffering from very little control over their life, they WILL act destructively over the tiny bit they can, either harming themselves or their environment or people lower than them in the pecking order, because in a way, that feels like a reclamation of autonomy. saying "you have so much power over me but can you stop me from hurting myself and destroying what you havent managed to claim yet?". its just like, kind of what human brains do and frequently has little to do with a persons actual personality or impulses, its just. desperate brains trying to control SOMETHING because autonomy is a fundamental human need and when thats taken away we get. very bad off. (this is one big reason eating disorders are SO common with abused kids.) so i think a lot of the s1 aelwyn we see is like. this is a very desperate, abused teenager "acting out" in the only way it is possibly somewhat safe for her to do so because, on a psychological level, the self destruction is weirdly the only emotional tether and its either this or just dissociate all the time (something we do see she has problems with in canon)

and yes, she did treat adaine horribly in s1. she fully did. obviously what we get in canon is what happens but a moment thats interesting to me is in episode 1 where adaine has attacked aelwyn several times, who either does nothing or just bounces it back, when she says "i never cast spells at you" and siobhan immediately retcons it and says "yes you do, all the time" (i havent gone back and watched this bit so i might be wording this wrong). obviously its an improv show and the canon is built between performers as they go, but that was interesting to me. that brennan hadnt intended for her to have fought back in that way. she definitely feeds into the emotional abuse from their parents and participates in all the toxicity there, but we know in canon that she did that because of overwhelming fear and self preservation. and that her self hatred because of it just fed back into the cycle and made her feel like she wasnt good enough to even try to break free from it. this is very common in golden child/scapegoat sibling relationships where the golden child SEES what the parents are capable of and becomes a participant in the abuse out of fear for their own standing. in any way siding with the scapegoat child not only directs abuse at themselves as well, but frequently makes things WORSE for the scapegoat because the parents will take out the challenge to their power on them even more. so, if aelwyn DID ever try to defend or help adaine when they were small, she would have VERY QUICKLY learned that made things worse for everyone. and just. sectioned that part of her brain off, as she's done with so many other things. (and i dont think im reading too much into the forest scene with the abernants to say their parents were VERY QUICK to turn abuse towards aelwyn if she stepped out of line even a little. like, you dont flinch when a hand moves unless. you know. dont need to say it just something to think about. as far as we saw in canon, she had done everything they asked of her leading up to the forest, and we DONT KNOW what happened in it but we do know brennan specifically called out how in broken spirits she was when adaine was summoned, even though they did the ritual to avoid all of the nightmare bullshit)

(the house party is literally a whole separate post but i think its fair to point out that 1) she was super under the influence when that was happening which DEFINITELY is in no way an excuse for her behavior but worth remembering when trying to analyze that 2) her losing that fight did canonically have DRASTIC consequences for her and even if she didnt know exactly how that was going to turn out, i think she knew how bad it might be. and she did not know adaine or any of the bad kids were going to be there in the first place)

all that said, it feels in some ways counterproductive to say that aelwyn is an extremely devoted and protective person (yes we're getting to the paladin shit i know i've been rambling a while) but i think that thats strangely ALL WE ACTUALLY KNOW ABOUT HER. because we've established that her self-destructive and abusive behavior in s1 is almost entirely psychologically scripted for her by her parents, we dont know how much of her villain shit in s1 was LITERALLY UNDER THREAT OF DEATH because we know at least killing the oracle was and we dont know how much of the rest of it was mandated by either her parents or kalina other than that she probably was under orders not to tell adaine the truth, and we know participating in all of this caused extreme self loathing in her that she refused to show to anybody and was too terrified to act on in any way

so, like. what does that actually leave us?

here's what we do know about aelwyn:

- of all the schools of magic, she went into abjuration

- the entire bbeg plan from season 1 hinged on aelwyn's complete faith that her level 1 sister was the most prodigious diviner in the world

- right after (?) the house party, she locked her memories where only adaine could find it with a note basically saying "theres so much bad blood between us but i know only you could find this"

- she desperately wanted to protect adaine and the fact that she was too afraid to do so made her hate herself (and her knowing that adaine now knows this is the turning point in their relationship)

- despite everything, even in the nmk forest, she still loved her parents

- the SECOND she is shown genuine love and affection and care from adaine, and adaine says whatever you do, i am here with you, all her actions from there forward are just about protecting adaine from their father, very nearly at the cost of her own life

- with what she probably thought were her last words (and would have been if adaine hadnt given her the tincture), all she wanted to communicate was how to help adaine and the bad kids, and how despite everything she had always believed in her

- at five levels of exhaustion, unconscious, she used her first spell slot after nine months of torture to build a shield around adaine

NOW we get to paladin!aelwyn. because, once everything is stripped away, the abuse and the control and the maladaption and the threats and the torture, EVERYTHING we ACTUALLY can glean about aelwyn's personality and inner core is that she's protective and devoted. and of course classes arent locked by personality, but that just screams paladin to me. its her WHOLE THING. adaine even says "wizards dont have heals, we dont care about other people" and of COURSE that isnt true for either of them, but? mechanically? aelwyn chose the wizard school that DID let her protect, and DID let her help, but i dont think, at this point, going forward, thats really going to be enough for her (and we could also talk about the parallels between them, how often adaine uses her portents to help other people)

i think a lot of the different reads on aelwyn come from this fundamental disconnect between her actions and displayed personality vs who she actually is and what she actually wants. and i think there are very different interpretations of what thats going to look like for her going forward. but i think, for a girl who's most hated characteristic about herself was her self preservation at the detriment of others, her perceived selfishness, and her fear ... isn't choosing to be braver and more selfless and more protective and shedding that self-preserving instinct for the betterment of others ... and MECHANICALLY being able to act on all those things ... the logical next step? i think its going to be a LONG TIME before aelwyn can love herself, but what other way is there to try? if adaine loves her, and adaine believes she can be better, isnt being better because she trusts adaine kind of a form of self love? saying, i dont believe in myself, but i believe in the person who believes in me, and maybe, in a roundabout way, thats the same thing. she was never able to TRY to be better before, because trying to improve even a little, even when people arent watching, when a harmful force has so much power over you and your actions ... like, the mental dissonance is honestly TOO much to even try, thats WAY more terrifying than letting yourself be bad, to the point where thats psychologically impossible for a lot of people. but now she actually has space and freedom and CHOICE and she CAN embrace the instincts she always had to shove down, she CAN be the person she knows her sister needed her to be

i dont know, i think theres an inherent love letter to yourself in wanting to be better and wanting to improve, even if you justify it by saying its for someone else. and now aelwyn actually CAN improve, and thats probably going to be extremely awkward and scary and there will be set backs and backslides for sure. but. i dont know. i think she wants to make up for lost time. because she never wanted the time to be lost in the first place. and if a protector is who she always wanted to be, whats stopping her from being that now?

[jupitermelichios]

On a more possitive note, I’ve started watching Sword Art Online. It’s one of the worst things I’ve ever seen (and the last film I saw in cinemas was Cats to give you context for the scale i’m working on here) and I kind of adore it in much the same way I love garbage like Smallville or Twilight. It’s so stupid on so many levels. You could challenge someone to write the worst anime, and it would almost certainly be better than SAO. It’s almost hypnotic how terrible it is.

No one should watch this terrible terrible show so I therefore don’t feel at all bad that I’m about the spoil absolutely everything, but honestly if you do also hate-watch this please come talk to me about how terrible it is. I don’t know anyone else who watches it.

Highlights of Season 1 include:

everyone is trapped in an MMO, and if you die in the MMO you die IRL. but if you were a beta-tester you’re probably fine because they just let them keep all their levels and items from the testing, so they’re all massively OP and everyone just accepts this as a normal and non-game-breaking thing

it’s a fantasy MMO but there’s no races, no magic system, no weapons except swords and maces, and not even an option to dual wield - literally all you can do in this fucking game is stand in front of an enemy and mash the attack button. I’m pretty sure they’re trapped there because the devs realised no one would play this post launch-day otherwise because it’s boring as shit

when the villain traps everyone he also just changs all their avatars to look like they do IRL for absolutely no reason, like actually none, he doesn’t even say he thinks it would be funny, he just does it and no one questions it and it is literally never mentioned again because this is the worst TV show ever animated.

in the second episode the main character deliberately witholds information about how to defeat a boss, indirectly causing multiple deaths. there is absolutely no reason for him to withhold it, he was just being a jerk because he doesn’t like people

in the third episode they reset his entire personality and he’s now a selfless hero pretending to be a lower level than he really is so people will find him more relateable and be his friend because all he wants is to help people. this is not a consequence of episode 2, they just decided they didnt like the character as he’d previously been written.

he makes some new friends who are all objectively terrible people who have decided for no season that the twelve year old who doesn’t really know how to play and keeps having anxiety attacks about the very real possibility of death has to be the guild tank. the MC is high enough level to be functionally immortal in like half the levels, but doesn’t tell anyone this he just lets them go on bullying this child

none of his friends survive that episode, in the game or IRL. which is also a christmas epsiode. a child dies in battle because she’s a terrible tank and then a man commits suicide out of guilt, so then the main character murders santa to try and bring them back from the actual dead but it doesn’t work because again, this is a video game and they are dead IRL, so then he walks off into the snow alone. Christmas!

we meet the best character in the entire show in episode 4, Rosalia, who has gone evil and started just straight murdering people because she’s sick of being an attractive adult woman who can’t get a date because she’s surrounded by lolicons who are only interested in the preteen characters (not a joke, that comes up, the show is firmly on the side of the lolicons)

in the same episode we get an extended bra and panty sequence staring an actual fucking child, like canonically this character is maybe 13 at best. this is one of only 2 occaisions when they feel the need to undress a character and it’s the fucking 12 year old, it’s so gross it reads like a parody of itself

literally every single named female character aged over 8 who talks to the MC falls in love with him after like 5 minutes (and in season 2 this includes his actual sister). he shows absolutely no interest in any of them (including his sister, thank god) until...

the main character gets engaged to a girl he only knows from an MMO after a virtual single date (he doesn’t actually win her in a PVP match but only because he looses the match, he 100% canonically tries to win her in a match, which she is apparently fine with). he then doesn’t bother to ask for her real name until the final episode, he just calls her by her screen name

(that’s okay though becuase it turns out that this moron of a love interest used her real name, on a local server, in a game where your character looks like you do IRL, because apparently getting doxxed is her hobby)

they then get in-game married off screen. there’s not even like a still of a wedding photo. nothing. the main character proposes and then the show immediately jumps to the honeymoon, it’s fucking bizarre.

they find a creepy child dressed all in white with no memory alone in the woods a week into their honeymoon who starts calling them mommy and daddy literally seconds after they first meet her, and they don’t suspect anything suss is going on and adopt her

for hilarity bear in mind the main character may only be 15 at this point (he says he’s only just turned 16 in the last epsiode, but his actual birthday is never mentioned), and his virtual wifu is 16, but no one ever questions the marriage or the adoption, even though ‘hey marriage in a video game is as important and meaningful as marriage in real life’ is an actual conversation people have multiple times. also they think the child they adopt is an actual IRL 8 year old who thinks these randos she met in an MMO are her mum and dad and everyone just goes with that like it’s a totally normal thing

a character called ‘Thinker’ agrees to meet an enemy faction leader for peace talks. the “peace talks” take place in a high level dungeon and he is told to come alone with no weapons and no fast travel. he does this. no one ever comments that his name is ironic, and in fact they seem to think that being betrayed and trapped in a dungeon with a boss is a totally unexpected turn of events Thinker could never have planned for

they take their new baby into the dungeon to rescue thinker, because they went to the jean grey school of baby rearing, and she imediately reveals that she’s actually a magical maggufin with infinite power, murders the grim reaper, and then dies. In literally the second episode she’s in

after she dies the MC hacks the admin account of the game, converts her corpse into an in game item, and saves to the local storage on his console, with the intention of bringing her back to life as a robot once they’re saved from the game. I’m not joking, that’s an actual thing that happens.

the fact that the main character can just access the main admin account and make massive game-breaking changes isn’t used again in that game and he never thinks to try and use it to force log people out or give himself infinite life so he can just rush the game and free everyone. nope, convert a corpse into an item and then never think about it again.

there’s an entire episode where all they do is go fishing. its the only filler episode in the season, and it immediately follows the death of a small child. it’s the most tone-deaf beach episode in writing history

it turns out this game, this game where they didn’t bother coding in any difference races, weapons, or any kind of magic system, was intended to have fully sentient AI therapists, because why the fuck not at this point honestly

oh also the game has PVP and you can trick the game into thinking a sleeping player is in PVP with you in order to actually murder a real person without it flagging in-game as a murder making the crime impossible for the real life legal system to investigate even though you just murdered a person. and they expect us to believe this game had actual beta testers. at least cyberpunk wasn’t played on microwaves you connected straight to your brain (also not a joke, the VR consoles canonically work by sending microwave radiation into your brain, no wonder VR never caught on)

the set up for the show is that they have to reach level 100 of a dungeon in order to win. At level 75, the writers got bored and the show just ends.

it turns out the power of love allows you to just break the fucking game and the main villain literally has a line about how ‘love allows you to remove debuffs, huh, we didn’t think to plan for that’ because again, there’s no metaphors in this show, everything is 100% literal including the fact that falling in love with another player means you’re immune to the paralysis status effect

power of love also allows you to very briefly become a poltergeist after being killed, but only for like 2 seconds. again not a joke or a metaphor, main character is killed but then gets to hang around as a ghost for a little bit to enable him to defeat the boss. he also doesn’t die in real life despite that being the entire fucking premise of the show, again because power of love.

the bad guy literally has no plan, he’s just doing shit for the sake of having something to do. His actions directly cause the deaths of more than 4,000 people, and it’s not even in aid of anything. they ask him why he trapped 10,000 people in an MMO and allowed them to slowly die, and he’s just like ‘huh, i forgot i did that, random’ and then just fucking peaces out

the fact that he committed one of the largest mass killings outside of war never really comes up again, as far as we know he doesn’t even go to jail. i think the show actually kind of thinks he’s a good guy, which is a fucking WILD moral stance to take on the deaths of 4000 completely innocent people for absolutely no reason

If this sounds hilari-bad but you don’t want to invest the time to watch a show which is objectively garbage, it has an abridged series which is famously better than the show it’s parodying (i’m dead serious, people have character arcs, the getting married after one date thing is properly addressed, the mc has to deal with PTSD because of all his friends dying in epsidode 3, they don’t immediately follow the death of a child with an extended fishing montage, the villain has an actual plan). It’s mostly actually pretty good, but this is the internet and it’s an abridged series, so while there are a lot fewer yikes moments than most it still has enough that I’m not comfortable recommending it without the caveat. that said I still enjoyed it a lot, although possibly not at much as pointing and laughing at the garbage that is the actual show.

[unlikelymilkshakedream]

A/n: Hello! Here is part 3 for the Charlie Weasley fic I promised. Sorry this took so long. I promised angst, so I'm giving it. Hope you enjoy!

Another day, another exam, or so it seemed that way at Hogwarts. As May came to a close, and June starts, your O.W.L.s were giving you more stress than you had ever felt. Your future was on the line if you didn't do well with your exams.

Not only were your exams crushing you, your relationship had been rocky for a couple of months. After the valentines day dance with your date, Charlie Weasley, nothing could have made your life better. You were dating your best friend, all of your friends supported you, and you had no tests coming up. In other words, very different from your life currently.

You were still technically dating your best friend, but from long classes and homework that came with them, to Charlie's quiditch practices lasting forever in hopes of winning the house cup, you hadn't had time to spend a moment alone together in what felt like years.

Your friends would always be there for you and you knew that, you cared about them with your whole heart and knew they felt the same way, but they had their own exams and futures just as you did. You would never ask them for anything because you didn't want to be a burden.

And of course, your exams. Your dreams of becoming a curse breaker were very important to you. You wanted nothing more than to help people, on top of finding your brother and protecting hogwarts. You were a natural curse breaker so it only makes sense that you would pursue your passion. However, if you wanted to do that, you needed to not only pass your exams, but exceed the expectations.

With that responsibility came nights on end in the library, studying, preparing and hoping that it would all work out. Your exams, finding your brother, hell, even your relationship with Charlie. You knew how rocky it was and you were devastated by that, but you knew if you two truly wanted to, it would work out, or so you hoped.

So, another night in the library, was your fate. You wanted to be with Charlie, but you knew he had quiditch practice, and you had a potions exam in the morning that you weren't ready for. As you flipped through your book, trying to soak up as much information as you could, you didn't notice a certain redhead sneak behind you.

"Hey baby," you felt the hot breathe on your neck and jumped more than out of your skin.

"Blimey Charlie, you scared me." He chuckled as he pulled a chair beside you.

"Sorry, I just wanted to see you after practice, and I haven't seen you all weekend." He smiled at you, which you couldn't help but smile back.

"I know, its just tomorrow starts like the most stressful week of the year. If I don't do well on my exams, my future can be forgotten. Speaking of, I am not ready for potions tomorrow, hence why I'm here." You smiled as you looked back towards your book.

"Hey, you're gonna do great on your exam because you are great, and smart, and beautiful," Charlie said as you rolled your eyes and laughed. "Its just we haven't seen each other in a while, thought i could keep you company." You sighed.

"Look, I know we haven't been the most talkative lately, but what exactly do you want me to say, you know how important this is to me." He put his hand on yours.

"I know, I get it baby, I do, and after this week, we're gonna celebrate." He said with the biggest grin on his face. Suddenly, Madame Pince came around the corner with the dirtiest look on her face.

"Shh!" You smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry Madam-"

"Shh!!!" You sighed as she walked away. You turned back to charlie.

"You better go, I have to study and don't wanna get kicked out." You smiled at him.

"Okay, but I meant what I said about celebrating." He smiled hugley. You returned the smile, only a fraction of what he had given you. That made his smile falter and eventually he turned and walked back to his dorm.

Eventually you had to except the time as 11pm rolled around and Madam Pince kicked you out of the library. You took the book along with all your other stuff and headed towards your common room.

Once you were in, you sat down near the fireplace and opened your potions book once again, flipping to the section about dragon livers and how they were hard to get.

Eventually, you heard the clock strike 2am and had to call it a night. As you closed your booka nd sat back, looking into the fire, you thought of your life as a cursebreaker, how great it would be, how much you wanted to do it, and what you were willing to do to achieve that goal.

As you stood up and headed towards the stairwell, your way was blocked by charlie, the last person you expected to see, especially at this hour.

"Hey, what're you doing up?" Charlie asked groggy.

"I could ask you the same thing. I was just going to bed." You said as you pushed past him and climbed the stairs. He followed you up.

"I thought you'd be up, I was just checking on you." You turned around as you got to the last step before your dorm and smiled.

"Thats sweet, but go back to bed. Goodnight." You leaned down and kissed him on the cheek, then headed into your dorm, falling on your bed and instantly falling asleep.

The next morning, you woke at around 8. Shit. You were late. You quickly got up and dressed faster than ever and ran to the dungeons. You mad either to class just in time, not eating or anything.

"Well, well, Ms. Brooks, you have decided to grace us with your presence, how considerate." Snape sneered at you as you walked to your seat beside Rowan, breathing heavily, across the room, you saw Charlie looking worriedly at you, which was the last thing you wanted in that moment.

Once your potion exam was finished, you walked out of the room, feeling exhausted and like you failed. You started walking to your next exam, which was charms, the easiest of your exams. Soon enough a certain redhead caught up with you.

"Hey, y/n, why were you late today?" You turned to him.

"I over slept, which I dont do, so I didn't realize at which point I had to sprint to make it, which I didnt." You sighed tired lying. "Why?"

"Just wondering, I missed you at breakfast. Did you eat anything?" You smiled softly.

"No, I haven't but its fine, look i have to go to charms and I really don't wanna be late again, see you." Without another word from either of you, you walked away to charms.

At charms, you felt most confident of all classes, which honestly wasn't saying a lot. You finished your exam pretty easily and walked to the great hall, intending on studying until your Defense Against the Dark Arts exam in an hour. Once the clock struck the time to take your next exam, you left the great hall.

Once you reached DADA, you walked in with Tulip and took your seat. You should feel bad, but you just were so glad charlie wasn't there, staring at you like a sorry case. He meant well and you knew it but you just wanted space.

As you finished your final exam of the day, you headed to the library, studying for transfigurations next. When you reached the library, unfortunately you fell into the same pattern as the previous night, except this time no charlie.

When the clock struck midnight, you went to the dorm room and headed straight for bed, not bothering to study anymore. Once your head hit the pillow, you were out.

When you woke up the next morning, the sun was shining into your window nicely. It was a good way to wake up honestly. You say up and saw Rowan asleep. You figured you had a few minutes before breakfast so you got up and got dressed.

You and Rowan walked to breakfast while revising your transfiguration knowledge. You didn't feel as bad about it as potions but you also didn't feel as great about it as charms. Walking into the great hall, you found Charlie sitting with his younger brothers. You knew you had to go sit with him.

"Hey y/n, how'd you sleep?" Charlie asked as he saw you sit next to him and his brothers giggled at him, to which he sent a dirty look.

"Um, not the best but ye know. Its whatever." As you sat down you ate the blandest breakfast ever, granola and coffee, it would just have to do for today.

"Are you guys ready for the big game tomorrow night?" Fred asked the table. You looked at him with a confused expression whereas everyone else seemed to understand.

"What game fred?" He turned to you.

"Uh, the house cup game, we are so gonna kick hufflepuffs ass." Ah.

"Right, good luck." Charlie turned to you.

"You'll come right love? What me win?" You smiled as you sipped your coffee.

"Uh yeah, maybe, I might have to study for History of magic but we'll see." Charlie stopped.

"Y/n, you can't miss the game, its only the biggest game of the year. Please come." Ugh when he gave you those puppy dog eyes, you knew you were done for.

"Okay, yes I will go, of course I will." You smiled and kissed his cheek.

As breakfast finished and you and Rowan made your way to transfiguration, you felt confident in the upcoming essay. Going over info with Rowan definitely helped.

Once you were finished with the exam, you went to the great hall, being assigned twenty five inches of parchment for the second half of the exam was not ideal. You were stressed out, but at least you only had care of magical creatures left for the day, something you were sure you'd excel in thanks to charlie.

As you walked down the grounds for your exam, you felt very confident that you'd do well. Your confidence was correctly placed as you walked to the common room to start on you parchment for transfiguration, doing very well on your exam in care of magical creatures.

The real problems didn't start until the following day, charlies big game was today and you hadn't made a dent in your parchment, due to not being able to focus and eventually falling asleep far earlier than you would have liked. Today you had exams in astronomy, history of magic and a regular potions class. You were extremely busy today, it didn't help you woke up 20 minutes before your exam in astronomy so you had to sprint once again to be on time.

Once you were seated in astronomy, your exam begun and you didnt feel very confident. You gave it your all and after about 75 minutes, you were done. You walked out and saw your boyfriend charlie who lit up when he saw you. You walked over to him with a small smile on your face.

"Hey babe, whats up?" You asked him.

"Not much now that your hear, just nervous for later." You looked at his smiling face confused.

"Later?" His smile dropped. You had forgotten about the quitditch match.

"The match that determines who wins the house cup? I thought you were coming, its really important to me." Shit. Right, yeah of course you would go.

"Right, of course I will be there, sorry I'm just tired you know how it is. I will be there, but right now I have to go to potions, ill see you later." Damn, how had you forgotten?

Potions seemed to last forever as Snape lectured on Beatle brains, you swore you were going to die of boredom, all you wanted to do was study for history of magic.

When class was finally dismissed, you headed straight for the library, not having your final exam for an hour and a half. When you sat down in the library, you immediately fell into studying, the time slipping by quickly until it was time to go to your exam.

Arriving to your exam, you set your things down and got ready for it, feeling confident as you had spent a lot of time studying for this. You finished your exam in 65 minutes and headed to the great hall, feeling hungry.

When you got to the great hall and saw what was happening inside, all hunger left your body.

Shit.

Inside, Gryffindor students were celebrating the win of the house cup, you had forgotten the game. You walked in to the great hall and saw Charlie, held up by his teammates above everyone like a king. You smiled at how happy he looked, but when he saw you, its like every drop of happiness was taken from him and you felt your heart break.

Charlie told his team mates to let him down which they did as he made his way over to you, looking hurt and disappointed. You couldn't do much besides stand there and look at him sheepishly.

"Y/n, why didn't you come to the game, you knew how important it was to me and how much I could have used your support." He said loudly, causing those near you to look on at the conversation.

"Charlie, can we go in the hallway?" He looked pissed but didn't object. Once you were away from everyone, you turned to him.

"Charlie, I am so sorry I didn't go to your game, I was in the library studying and the time just got away from me and before I knew it I had to go to my exam and I completely forgot l. I'm so sorry. But you won anyway so you didn't need me at all, cause your just that good." You said with a smile, trying to defuse his anger. It didn't work.

"Y/n, that's not the point, you said you would be there and I wanted you there. You didn't need to study for your exam, you've been studying all week, this is all I asked of you and you couldn't even give me this." As he finished, you felt sorrow drain and anger rise.

"What exactly do you mean I didnt need to study for my exam? I have been studying all week, unlike you, because I care about getting good grades. You know how badly I need to do on my exams to have a future! I didnt go to your match, because I wanted to make sure I did well. I apologized but now your being irrational." He scoffed.

"Irrational? I asked one thing of you, I asked you to attend a quiditch match to support your boyfriend, but apparently if it doesn't benefit you, it doesn't matter, huh is that it?" You were now fully screaming at each other, thank god the hallway was deserted.

"Are you serious? You know maybe if you cared more about your future and grades like I do, you would see where I'm coming from, but all you care about is a God damn match and dragons! No wonder we've been like this for months. You say im selfish, I've done everything for you. I miss one thing and the worlds over to you." Charlie turned away and scoffed.

"You're right, we have been like this for a long time, because we just don't work anymore." You froze. "Y/n, you can't even support your own boyfriend, you care more about tests than anything, this clearly isn't working." You looked at him while a tear rolled down your cheek, which you quickly wiped away. You didn't want to break up with Charlie, God no. But he didn't seem to want to stay together.

"Charlie, it's not like that, you know how stressed I've been, I'm sorry I didn't come to your game, I truly meant to go. I care a lot about my future, but you don't and thats not on me. You can't put this on me, its not just the match, you've been like this ever since the dance, its not only me." More tears rolled down your cheeks as one slid out from his eye.

"Y/n, this just isn't working, I'm sorry." No, God no please.

"Charlie, no, please, don't do this. I swear I-" he cut you off.

"I'm sorry, its already done." He turned and walked away, leaving you standing alone in an empty corridor, feeling your heart leaving your soul. You don't know how it happened, you don't know where it went wrong. Was it truly the match? Or was it ever since the day of the dance? Did he even ever like you?

As you stood in that corridor, you felt cold, you felt like you soul left you. You watched him walk away and eventually out of eyesight, thinking about how you would never feel his kiss again, never feel the comfort of his embrace, never feel his love again.

You didn't want this, God no, but your gut told you it had to happen, you just wish it didn't hurt this much. As you wrapped your arms around yourself and sank to the floor with tears on your face, you felt nothing but hollow, wishing the presence of charlie was still there. Wishing he could hold you and tell you he loved you again, as you loved him still.

You didn't know how you were going to go on without him, but you knew one thing for sure, the last thing you cared about was your fucking grades, because you just lost the best thing in your life.

A/n: okay, sorry this took so long, I suck i know! Im sorry this was shitty, I will try to finish the series relatively soon, there will be 2 more parts. I hope you like it, thanks for reading!

[lonelyghosts-stuff]

Marvel’s What If Episode 7 Reaction

No no this is the opposite of what I wanted. More Loki! Not less!

If they don’t have Thor being an absolute idiot without Loki being his voice of reason I’m gonna be upset

Wait what the hell I saw Seth Green in the opening credits lmao??? Now I’m just thinking about Chris Griffin

DARCY

Wow they got Jane back too

Soooo how do they know about aliens?

“HOLY MOLY” lmao

Hey thor my life isn’t that dull… okay fine that’s a lie

Sooo Thor is a frat boy?

YOOOO I NEED A SCREENSHOT OF THAT ART WITH THOR AND LOKI

ALL OF IT

Soooo in this world, Odin was a good dude and didn’t kidnap Loki and gave him back to Laufey? (Didnt Laufey abandon him tho since he was too small? I guess in this universe they simply… lost their prince? Lmao?)

Thor didn’t have Loki as his voice of reason I called it.

Night night Odin

Lmao Chad Frigga dipping Odin as soon as he’s asleep

I wonder if they got Idris Elba back for Heimdall?

“We are going to the most backward, backwater planet that not even Heimdall pays attention to.” D,: Thor why you gotta do me dirty like that???

Chris Hemsworth is definitely a better voice actor than some others

Oh yo it be Skurge

Darcy into probing huh?

(Romantic Music Playing) lmao

Man I love Darcy

Poor Howard the Duck lmao (oh yea that’s Seth green)

Skrulls huh

Honestly surprised Thor knows all of these planets. Including the grandmaster??? In the sacred timeline he didn’t even know Sakaar existed.

Wait so, are the Asgardians on good terms with Jotunheim then? If so, I wanna see party loki. Or maybe he’s too reserved for that. I wonder how Laufey raised him? IF WE DONT SEE JOTUN LOKI IM GONNA RIOT

Thor destroyed a star. That sounds about right

“Now that was an excellent party. You know, we lost Fandral for three days. Found him in a barn, curled up next to a baby goat. It was classic. Isn’t that right, Fandral?” “I NAMED HIM GARY!” “Yeah, you did.” “YEA GOATS!” Okay. Screw everyone else in the MCU. I love Fandral now. He’s the GOAT, pun intended

Oh not a star, he killed a whole planet.

I thought Asgardians were supposed to be more advanced than earth but making a tablet is so complicated?

Howard and Darcy was not a pair I thought expected

Yo it’s nebula and korg? So where’s Thanos? How is nebula allowed to go partying with Thanos looking for the infinity stones?

Drax too? Isn’t he in prison? And then Valkyrie? Seems like a lot more than just Thor being an only child is different in this universe. Most of these dudes should hypothetically be in prison or on super serious missions. And I just thought, isn’t Howard the duck imprisoned by the Collector? What’s the timeline for this?

DARCY MARRIES HOWARD THE DUCK? GIRL YOU DESERVE BETTER THAN HIM AND HIS CORKSCREW WANG!

Aaaaaand Jane and Thor got magic and science tattoos. Mighty fast character progression.

Oh? Hookups? That took a turn.

Awwwww Fandral snuggling with a bunch of Chinchilla looking animals <3

Unknown caller?

Dammit Rumlow

Rocket???

Acting director??? What happened to Nick???

KORG NO

Damn everyone crashed at Jane’s

I mean, didn’t seem like too much of a threat

PHIL!!!

Lmao the world isn’t gonna be destroyed by parties?

Oh Carol Danvers?

Okay so…. Lemme get this straight..

Loki and an army of aliens attacking the world? Shield: “nah not a threat.” Robot with robot army threatening to destroy the whole planet “nah Carol has better things to do.” A partying dude from space with no ill intent but just doesn’t seem to understand consequences? “CALL CAPTAIN MARVEL WE NEED HER!!!” Yea okay Shield

Thor loves waffles

LOKI

JOTUN LOKI

HES HERE

LOKI!!!

HOLY CRAP HES HUGE

HE HAS ICE HORNS

See everything would be better without Odin’s interference.

(That’s what she said)

YAY THEYRE FRIENDS

“You’re my brother form another mother man.” YOOOOOO

Loki just sang “Brothers foreveeeeerrrrr!” I can’t—

Aaaaaand fart jokes… “did you boom?” “I never boom. I only boom in private.” Dammit marvel I hoped you were better than this.

LOKI MAKE A WISH

White snake? Lmao where did she get that name lol.

What’s wrong with a party tho? Is this really top priority? Yea they destroyed another planet, but you never explained how

Why doesn’t she sound like Brie Larson? She’s still acting for Marvel Studios so it’s interesting they couldn’t get her for it… unless it is her and I just can’t remember how her voice sounds

Was that punch really necessary? Dude wasn’t posing a threat to anyone.

“You know, there’s a Midgardian word for women like you.” THOR NO—

“PARTY POOPER!” Oh thank God

“This ones for fury” but it wasn’t even Thor that hit him? It was korg and on accident! Cmon carol, I had hoped you’d be smarter than this and more reasonable. Not resorting to violence when nothing has even escalated…

Haha hammer to the face

And the back of the head lmao

BAHAHAHAHA HE JUST SMACKED HER INTO ANOTHER COUNTRY

THOR DONT BOOP STONEHENGE

Dammit Thor

Lmao I love that the countries have their names on them.

Okay just stay and fight here away from civilian population

Marvel really giving us what we want with the most powerful characters fighting

Mary Sue Captain Marvel

Her lipstick has stayed perfect somehow

Fighting in a storm eh? Can’t see how this could go wrong

Haha hammer timeout

Lmao I wanna see Frigga put Thor in a timeout

They’re chanting pooper at her. Is this elementary school again?

Bruh I just realized, Thor is supposed to be acting king while Odin is in Odin sleep lmao. I bet Asgard is going to either be in the best peace ever without Thor or utterly destroyed.

Leave south and north Dakota alone lol

Lmao I love Darcy

YAY GARY THE GOAT WAS SAFE

Wow Jane used the L word fast

Kicking Jane out of the helicarrier? Yea smart move kicking off the person who actually knows anything about this albeit she is a little blinded by love

Giant Loki holding a tiny phone

BAHAHAAHAHA “hey earth girl, you haven’t got a friend, have you!” YES LOKI ITS ME. MARRY ME

Stop throwing phones lmao

BRUH HOW IS SURTUR NOT EVIL EITHER? AND STOP FLIRTING WITH THE STATUE OF LIBERTY.

NO HE DESTROYED HER ARM LMAO

There goes the power grid

NOT THE SYDNEY OPERA HOUSE

Lmao there he goes

WHY DID KORG HAVE A PACIFIER IN HIS MOUTH

Bout time Heimdall popped in

Aaaaaand Jane got abducted by heimdall

Seeing as Heimdall hasn’t said anything, I’m assuming they didn’t get Idris back lol.

How is shield so chill on murdering Thor? Yes he’s destructive but they’re resorting to killing him so fast instead of talking to him! No one has even told him he’s putting the planet at risk! Dudes too dumb to know on his own!

JANE STOP DRINKING

Damn Maria Hill I had higher hopes for you

Lying Thor

Okay so shield trusts Frigga to help, but still irks me that shield was so trigger/nuke happy… seems the opposite of what we’ve seen of them (ugh just gotta ignore it and chock it up to this being an alternate reality)

Ew Drax

Loki calling the other jotuns “ice bros” lmao

It’s also mantis and Yondu!!

wait how did grandmaster just teleport away like the bifrost?

Nice going thor. You big hunky dummy

“MY MOTHER IS COMING.” Good lord is this high school now lmao???

How do they all know Frigga and why are they all afraid?

Damn the bifrost takes a lot longer than I would have expected

No no Thor the tower of pisa is meant to be tilted—oh whatever

Wait, but I don’t see loki helping, is he gonna be up to something last minute to ruin Thor’s cover up lmao?

I don’t believe Frigga would be tricked this easily lmao

Thor you are such a bad liar

Lmao here comes carol

Hahaha how did mjolnir get so trashed

Wow thor is so much taller than Jane

Wow this Jane and Thor seem to have more chemistry than the sacred timeline version ever did

Wait I want resolve for Loki!!

Uh oh

WHAT

ULTRON VISION WITH THE INFINITY STONES?? HOW

No resolution for that??? Well then. Rip this universe too lmao

Damn I wanted more Loki

There better be a Loki centric episode sometime. If they didn’t it’d a huge missed opportunity from marvel

Okay yea looking at the credits, Carol Danvers wasn’t played by Brie Larson but a lady named Alexandra Daniels. Odd they didn’t get Brie Larson.

Probably my favorite episode so far even with how absurd it was. A lot more upbeat than the past few ones with a better resolve to the story imo.

Also, if anyone can provide me of screenshots of Loki from this episode I would be very grateful