#its my husbands grandma who passed

[briarpatch-kids]

Family is grieving due to a somewhat expected death, so I'm doing what I do when people I love are sad and baking bread. I got two loaves made and a double batch of cinnamon rolls going for the morning.

[5-htagonist]

bro i remember being young and my grandma telling me if i dont learn to clean my room then i wont do it when im older. while there is some truth there what she did not account for was the audhd

[4ranghaes]

kim leehan x reader [fluff, dad!leehan, fem!mum!reader, use of leehan’s real name]

a/n - i’ve been wanting to write a dad!au about ANY of the members of ANY of the groups and then also aquarium date with leehan and i went to an aquarium today and saw this happening irl and its culminated in this…

13:02 - “mummy,” sua mumbled, gripping onto your hand tightly, her small body almost totally hidden behind your leg. “i’m scared.”

you gasped dramatically, “you’re scared?!” the 2-year-old nodded in response, pressing her face into your thigh.

the entrance of the aquarium lingered in front of you, darker than the reception area and gift shop behind you. you could appreciate how it might be scary for a 2-year-old, but with her dad’s genes, her water-based name, and all the effort it took to get her and the baby strapped to your chest out the door and to the aquarium, you could only pray she would learn to enjoy it.

“donghyun-ah,” you called, looking to your husband who was already staring at the fish in the tanks down the hallway. “sua needs you.”

“what’s wrong, princess?” he asked, noticing your daughter’s shy look. he came up to the pair of you, crouching so he was at her eye level; she flopped into her dad’s arms.

“it’s scary,” she whispered.

“scary?!” he exclaimed, “sua-ya, fish are our friends! do you know how much your daddy likes fish?”

she pulled out of his body, looking at him with a slight curiosity before shaking her head.

“they’re my most favourite animal in the entire world! plus, these fish here are just the cousins and aunts and uncles of the fish we have at home, princess,” leehan smiled at his daughter who was now listening with increasing comfort and curiosity.

“and grandmas and grandpas?” she asked, already looking past her dad to the fish.

“of course!” he exclaimed, standing up and taking her tiny hand in his, “come on, we have to introduce ourselves, right? we’re basically family!”

sua giggled at her dad’s odd behaviour, jumping alongside leehan, who was walking, to the first tank.

“hello fish,” leehan said, unfaltering confidence as he waved, “i’m kim donghyun.”

sua giggled, looking curiously at the fish swimming past.

“sua, look at this one!” he exclaimed, crouching down again as a big catfish swam against the glass. “go on, introduce yourself.”

sua remained shy, hiding herself in her dad’s side as she waved, talking in a small voice. “hello catfish. i’m kim sua.”

leehan put on a funny voice, replying as the catfish, “hello kim sua. nice to meet you.”

sua’s loud laugh rang through the aquarium, suddenly filled with excitement as she ran to the next tank.

“some of these fish are in really terrible conditions, you know,” leehan said to you, as the two of you strolled after your daughter.

you nodded, smiling as you brushed his hair back, your other hand cradling the baby on your chest as he slept softly, “i know, love. but maybe if we come here often enough, she’ll learn to take after her father.”

“she already is! look at her,” leehan smiled proudly, watching sua’s face, millimetres from the glass, as she waved to each fish that passed, “we waited too long to bring her.”

you smiled, agreeing with a hum as you finally reached your over-excited toddler at the next tank.

“hello, i’m kim leehan,” he introduced himself to the fish, turning to look at you expectantly. “mummy?”

laughing, you looked down to your daughter who looked up at you with excited, shining eyes, resembling that of her father’s. “hello fish! i’m y/n.”

sua giggled, looking back at the fish, “i’m kim sua!” she suddenly looked to her little brother in the papoose on your body, “and this is kim haesu but he can’t talk yet.”

leehan looked as if his heart would burst from the cuteness of his daughter as he leaned down to kiss her head.

“good girl,” he smiled, “come on, let’s keep going. i’ve heard there’s sharks here!”

[look-at-the-soul]

Watching over us

Tommy Shelby x reader

This story has been in my drafts for a while… I wrote it for @peakyswritings 2K celebration 🎉 congratulations dear Reb! You’re probably way over by now… I’m sorry for taking so long!

But like I always say, each story has its own time… initially it would focus in that infamous scene between Lizzie and Tommy in the open field, I never liked how she approached Tommy in such vulnerable state so I decided to “fix it” 🤭 but it was so so dark that I doubted and never posted it, to portray Tommy like that, gave me chills beyond words, luckily after dreaming of my grandma after she passed away, I decided to mix both ideas and make the story a little less sinister… or at least I hope so.

Like always, my deepest gratitude to @blondie-22 for the remarkable work around the moodboard, I mean look at this?! It’s perfect!!! 🙌🏻👏🏻

Summary: Ruby has been having some dreams that make her feel uneasy while Tommy is away. Because how would you feel after dreaming of someone who already passed away but it’s trying to send a message?

You paced the open room from side to side, toying with the necklace around your neck. Patiently waiting for your husband to arrive.

It was only matter of time.

The sky went dark a while ago and you really couldn’t put this on hold. His daughter had questions, she wanted answers, an explanation… something to believe in.

Frances had asked a few times if you needed something until you guided her to her headquarters, longing for some peace, for a moment alone to try to rearrange your own ideas.

A part of you felt calm, looking at the bright side, it wasn’t something you should feel worried about. Another part felt uneasy about how to approach the matter properly.

Eventually, the sound of Tommy’s car approaching filled your ear sight and you rushed towards your husband.

“Tommy.” You called breathlessly.

“What’s the matter?” He asked right away, aware of your state.

“I’m so glad you’re home now, come… we need to talk. About Ruby.”

His heart stopped beating for a split second, worry shadowed his crystal orbs.

“What happened?” He tensed thinking of the possibilities.

Taking the briefcase from his hand, you placed it on the table by the door, to move then to get his coat.

“What’s the matter?” He asked bluntly trying to control his voice.

But you pushed him slightly until he took a seat, not knowing how he’d take the news. He was particularly protective over Ruby specially after she miraculously overcame pneumonia.

“Take it easy, she’s waiting for you in our bedroom, I asked her to sleep and assured her you’d wake her up to talk…” taking a deep breath, you placed your hands on his shoulders for reassurance. “She’s been dreaming of Polly, she only started this week. A dream per night, it’s very vivid and she remembers everything afterwards. But she’s scared.”

“Ruby, Ruby, my little Rube.” He mumbled getting rid of his leather gloves. Standing up, he skipped a few steps on his way to the second floor, you following him closely.

The abrupt passing was taking a toll in the Shelby family. It wasn’t easy to move on, specially as grief came in waves.

You saw him stopping on his tracks at the sight of his daughter sleeping on his side of the bed, her hair scattered over the pillow, her soft features relaxed.

Gently, you pushed him towards the bed, so he could get closer.

Sitting by Ruby’s feet, Tommy doubted of disturbing her sleep, he contemplated the small and fragile figure, his precious daughter. Touching her hand gently, he brought it to his lips, to place a feather-like kiss.

“Daddy?” Her eyes fluttered open.

“Yes, I’m here my darling.”

Ruby launched herself into his arms, finding the comfort she needed in his chest and embrace.

“I saw aunt Polly.” She explained rubbing her eyes.

Tommy’s eyes searched for you at the opposite side of the bed. Then, he caressed her face, noticing she was still wearing the Black Madonna around her neck.

“What did you see?”

Ruby then went on to explaining him all about her first dream. That first night she dreamed of Polly, there was a knock on the door and Ruby went to open it, even though it was always Frances responsible to attend, but when she saw her beloved auntie, she didn’t hesitate to give her hug. To which Polly only answered with a smile and wrapping her arms around Tommy’s daughter. The following night, Ruby dreamed she was using the swing by the big tree and as she started moving higher, she looked over her shoulder and found Polly pushing her, when the girl asked how could she do that, her aunt only gave her a lighthearted laugh and kept pushing her until Ruby looked back again and she wasn’t there anymore.

The first verbal communication came by the third night though. When Ruby prayed before going to bed for her aunt, You told her it was the best she could do, pray for her soul, for her spirit to find peace. That night her dream started when she was sitting by the fireplace, feeling someone close, Ruby turned her head and found Polly standing by the doorframe.

“I’m praying for you.” The girl started the conversation.

“Thank you.” Polly replied with a nod, wrinkles appeared around the corner of her eyes when she smiled at her niece. “I heard you.”

“How?” Ruby asked in confusion.

“Have no fear my sweet girl, I’m always watching over you.”

When Ruby tried to get up to be closer to Polly, she was gone, and that’s when Ruby woke up.

Tommy gasped by the surprise the dreams his daughter was having.

“Polly.” He murmured.

“Am I going crazy daddy?” Ruby asked with concern.

You already assured her that wasn’t the case, she should feel calm and thankful that Polly had chosen her to let them know she was alright. But she needed to hear it from her father.

“No, of course not. Polly loved you very much.” He assured her.

“She said she loves you too and that she’s sorry for never telling you that.” Ruby treated Polly’s message for her father, which sent Tommy to let out a choked sob.

“She told you that?” He asked shocked but treasuring her words.

Ruby nodded and then proceeded to tell her father another dream, she was walking in a beautiful open field full of flowers and trees, she could hear the river close, the sky was clear, it was a gorgeous day. A beautiful butterfly caught her attention.

“She told me to ask you to be careful.” Ruby expressed solemnly. “Don’t believe everything. That you’re not going to die.” His daughter sighed and then continued. “She said read the papers.”

Tommy’s head snapped to find you staring at him already.

Time stood still for an instant. Blood flew off his body, he had kept a secret the illness detected by Doctor Holford from both his children. After he set Lizzie free and signed the divorce papers, Charlie went to live with her and Ruby, but a few weeks later, Ruby asked to see her father and occasionally stayed to sleep there, you had welcomed her with open arms. You had accidentally found the diagnosis and since then you had supported him without a second thought. Convinced to help him live his last days as better as possible.

That was part of the reason why he rushed the wedding and asked you to go to courthouse in the middle of the day, he was afraid to leave you unprotected.

“Were you going to die daddy?” Her concerned voice brought Tommy back to reality.

“Ruby, remember when you asked me if it was a bad thing that you dreamed of someone who is already gone?” You asked the girl instead, walking around the bed to stand behind Tommy.

When she nodded, you smiled briefly. Going back in time.

“Sometimes it’s a signal our loved ones give us to let us know they’re alright, or guide us somewhere.” You explained softly.

Tommy cleared his throat.

“Y/N is right.” Tommy explained. “That’s how I met Y/N.”

Flashback

Your heart froze, you had seen everything. A man desperate screaming into the nothing, bringing a gun into his temple.

But it failed… thankfully.

Or at least you didn’t hear the shooting, but you saw him collapsing into the mud. As you were about to run towards him, a tall, slim woman approached him. She mumbled something and then let a few bullets fall next to him.

You would never approve how Lizzie approached the matter. Tommy was in a vulnerable state after failing the Mosley assassination, he needed someone to be there for him right there to pick him off the ground. Not a resentful wife giving him the bullets. You shook your head disapprovingly at the thought.

*

“Tommy…” it was his mother’s voice. Was he already dead? He had to. “Tommy it’s not your time yet.”

Again there was her sweet voice, just like he remembered.

“My darling you need to get up. You still have things to do.” She insisted. She looked beautiful.

Just like the morning before she drowned in the canal, her hair blowing against her face, her crystal eyes just like his shining.

But he was tired. Oh so tired of everything already.

She pressed down a kiss to kiss his cheek.

“Wake up and you’ll find what you need.”

“Don’t go mother.” He whispered just as he felt someone hold up his head.

*

“Mister? Can you hear me?” A woman dressed in a white gown kneeled before him, gently placing his head on her lap, trying to remove the dirt from his eyes and nose.

And he knew right away, what his mother meant in his dream.

When he saw that selfless woman taking care of him considering the state he was in, both physically and mentally he knew you needed to be in his life. You didn’t hesitate to offer her help genuinely, didn’t care your clothes got dirty, instead you focused on his well-being.

(End of flashback)

“You know the rest of the story, Lizzie and I got divorced and after that, Y/N moved in with me, she’s been taking care of me.”

“You’ve never talked about your Mum.” Ruby pointed out. “I didn’t know you dreamed of her too.”

Tommy nodded, moving one of his hands to his shoulder, to cover yours. Touched by remembering the events. Of course he decided to not mention Ruby that her own mother dropped deliberately the bullets next to him before you helped him. She didn’t need to know that.

“The night before that happened,” you spoke looking at Ruby, “I went to sleep early, I felt so tired but past midnight I started to feel uneasy. And out of nowhere, I found myself walking in a wide open field covered by fog, I kept walking and when I reached the river, there was a woman who asked me for help desperately.”

Taking a deep breath, you continued with the story. “I didn’t recognize her at all, she just kept asking for my help, calling for someone whose name was Tommy. When I saw the fear in her eyes, I followed her, we kept walking for a while until I saw a shadow standing in the middle of the field.”

Ruby’s eyes observed you intensely.

“Help him please.” She pleaded again. “After that I woke up, it was probably five in the morning just like in my dream, luckily I knew the place so I grabbed a coat and went outside to see if it was real… something indescribable was pushing me to keep going, until I found your Dad.” You sighed loudly at the memory feeling Tommy squeeze your fingers.

“That day, Y/N saved my life.” Tommy added, if it wasn’t for Y/N, he would have taken the bullets after Lizzie left him there in a vulnerable state and to end with his own life.

He couldn’t help it but shudder at the memory.

“I didn’t know back then she was Polly and that she had just passed away.” Y/N continued trying to explain everything to Ruby according to her age. “But as I helped your father back into the house, and days went on and we were talking about what happened, I told your Dad about my dream and described the woman I saw, when he showed me a photograph of your aunt Polly, I was surprised and shocked to know it was her.”

“Aunt Polly helped you save my Dad?” Ruby asked incredulously.

Y/N gave Ruby a reassuring smile. She had so many reasons to believe and be thankful for dreaming with Polly when Tommy needed help, that she found a way to communicate through her dream. Otherwise she wouldn’t have met him.

Tommy nodded profusely, and now he was sure Polly found a way through Ruby to let them know she was alright among other things.

“Sometimes Ruby, our loved ones know we need them and when they visit us in our dreams it’s a good thing after all. I like to think they do it because it’s the way they have to show us they’re still around, they’ll always be.” You explained lovingly.

“I’m not scared anymore then, I know aunt Polly is still around.” Ruby declared solemnly.

Even it had been months since her passing away, Tommy sometimes still called her name after a meeting or looked up in the sky to find an answer.

He wasn’t sure how the afterlife worked, sometimes he thought it might be a result of his desperate need to find a solution. But listening to his daughter’s dreams… he had no other choice but to believe it might be real.

Tommy nodded, with a lump installed in his throat. “You can be sure, she will always be watching over us.”

Kissing his daughter goodnight, Tommy tucked her in and then he guided you outside the bedroom.

Rushing downstairs, Tommy went straight to his office to search for the papers. You following him but decided to give him some space, his eyes scanning the pages. One after one, cursing in between, you could see frustration taking a toll on him until he stopped abruptly.

Walking around the desk without asking him what was happening you took a look over his shoulder, following what caught his attention. And there it was, a photograph in the social section.

“Is that…?” Confusion crept over you.

“That bastard.” Tommy murmured.

His doctor was posing at the wedding of Diana and Oswald, the doctor posing next to them. All this fucking time… he creased the newspaper hard.

He was determined to end it right there, to get revenge after realizing of all the lies he had been telling him. But as he was about to walk out the door with a loaded gun in his hand, a soft but firm hand stopped him.

“Tommy.” You called him softly. “Take a minute to think this through… I know he deserves the worst punishment possible, he’s the worst. But you’re better than this.”

Your words seemed to soften his eyes for a moment, when he looked at you his whole expression changed.

“You told me you wanted to be different… better.” You tried again noticing the internal battle he was challenging. “You’re not like them.”

When Tommy’s anger subsided, you took the chance and retrieved the weapon from his hand placing it over his desk.

“Listen to me, take this easy.” You suggested, terrified of the look in his eyes. Since the day he pointed a gun to his temple you have never felt so uneasy and worried about him. “Tommy? This is what they want, a visceral reaction. They want you to explode and act impulsively.”

You felt him shaking under your touch.

“All of the lies he told me…” Tommy finally mumbled. “That fucking son of a bitch assured me these were my last days alive.”

He pursed his lips in an attempt to contain his anger. Not against you, but the situation.

“I know, my love.” You felt on the brick of tears. “But look at the bright side… we’ve a long road ahead.”

That’s when Tommy finally broke down. Hearing you say those words meant a lot to him.

He gave in and his weight pulled you down with him still in your arms, his choked sobs shattered your heart. He was like a young boy crying for his favorite toy.

“Tell me it’s true. Tell me Y/N.” He pleaded between sobs.

Since he met you, he told you how unfair it was after two failed marriages to finally find his true love but after his diagnosis he was angry at how little time he would have to love you.

And you felt the same.

You rocked him gently from side to side, feeling a wave of relief as your eyes fixed in the flames flickering in front of you.

“You aren’t sick Tommy, they lied to you to make you weak.”

News like that it wasn’t easy to digest, not especially after making peace with the idea of death. But finding out that he was healthy gave the two of you the chance to live what you’ve been missing all your life.

It gave you hope.

Although grandma doesn’t make an appearance here, she’s always the main inspiration, follow the Grandma series here

A dark story like this is never easy, so if you feel up to, I’d love to hear what you think! ✨♥️

Master list

Tag list: @lyarr24 @runnning-outof-time @cillmequick @datewithgianni @cloudofdisney

@onlydeadcells @gretelshelby @garrison-girl-08 @lespendy @fastfan

@stevie75 @prettylittlehoneyeyesxoxo @esposadomd @forbidden-forest-witch @ange-thoughts

@moral-terpitude @elenavampire21 @winchestergirl22 @zablife

@elk96 @blondie-22 @imichelle-l-rigby @allie131313 @already-broken144

@peakyscillian @babaohhhriley @shaddixlife @sloanexx @sydneyyyya

@adaydreamaway08 @pono-pura-vida @kmc1989 @thomashelbyswife @darleneslane

@lauren-raines-x @everythingelseisextra @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @lau219 @red-riding-wood

@ironpen @holacia3 @narlytude

[the-simp-of-all-simps-22]

Disclaimers: Spelling mistakes, unhealthy Obsession, Yandere. Taehyung is going to get worse and worse as this goes.

Chapter Two: Encounter

Taehyung entered the mysterious girl's dimly lit space with an aura that felt both enchanting and unnerving. The flickering lights cast a shadow that distorted her figure, making her seem almost otherworldly-like a diamond trapped in a room full of dull stones.

As she laughed, he could feel the air thicken, as if very essence around them was taking on a life of its own. She smiled, but there was something addicting about that smile, a hidden depth that hinted at darker intentions. There was a haunting beauty in her presence, reminiscent of a siren luring sailors to their room, and he mesmerized and unaware, felt himself slipping deeper into her web without her doing anything.

But the more he admired her, the more he realized that this masterpiece held a charm. A chill crept his spine with each word she uttered—a foreboding whisper that warned him he shouldn't be drawn to her allure. There was a lightness in her eyes.

Soyeon looks over and sees Chun-Yung with cousin Seo-jun and a girl. When she looks at her son. She sees him staring at the girl with Chun-Yung. She then looks at her husband and sees the look he was given pleading for her to distract Taehyung.

Soyeon rolls her eyes "Son, ensure you handle the stocks for tomorrow and send the builders to complete the museum." Soyeon said in a stern voice making sure Taehyung heard her and understood. Taehyung turns to face his mother giving her an inserting nod Taehyung younger brother walks over to distract their father.

Taehyung and Soyeon stroll over to Chun-Yung and the mysterious girl. "Chun-Yung, so glad you made it! How's everything with the beauty makeup?" Soyeon beams at Chun-Yung, but her eyes dart back to the mysterious girl like a kid in a candy store.

"Auntie, it's going great! This is my best friend L/N Y/N, she's an amazing artist—she painted that masterpiece in my mom's foyer."

Chun-Yung flashes her best smile, trying to impress. But honestly Soyeon's not the easiest to deal with; she can be, well, a bitch. Everyone's a little scared of her (a lot) except her husband, Lee Bong-Tae—he's like her personal calmness coach!

Taehyung couldn't take his eyes off Y/N since his cousin Chun-Yung mentioned her name: L/N Y/N. It suddenly clicked for him—she was the artist who created that stunt painting in his aunt's foyer. Taehyung was captivated by her beauty that he couldn't form a word. He glanced down at her outfit: a silky, spaghetti strap dress that made her look like she stepped out of a dark romantic novel. She was truly a work of art herself. "Your art is amazing dear you have talent" Soyeon said trying to get Taehyung to talk.

"Nice to meet you I'm Kim Taehyung you are the most astonishing woman I have ever met Ms L/N." Taehyung said trying to flirt with y/n, y/n pulled her hand a little trying not to come off as rude "Thank you guys so muc, it's amazing to finally meet you guys" y/n gave the sweetest smile she could pull before she gave a the little bow and walking away linking arms with Chun-Yung. Taehyung stares at y/n figure walking away he is gonna follow her but his mother stops him "You still need to attend to your guests, so let's get moving!" Taehyung follows his mother's order but still glances at y/n every second he could without getting caught

AN:

Hey guys sorry I haven't posted my grandma passed away so I feel down but I'll try my best to keep posting bye

[youngestdaughtersyndrome]

🧚🏻‍♀️

Waittt omg this reminds me of an objectively crazy piece of youngestdaughtersyndrome lore but its kind of long so im putting it under a cut ....

So like way back in the day (like wayyyy back im talking 4-7th century) in scotland-- and this is the way my great grandma tells it so who knows if its the official story-- there was the macleod clan of castle dunvegan. And this kid loses his favorite hound right? So hes searching for him everywhere, far and wide, just wandering over the moors for days until he comes to a bridge just sitting in a clearing, totally purposeless like not crossing over anything, and he hears a bark. And hes dead certain that its his dog so he searches the surrounding forest around the bridge but he cant find his dog. Unthinkingly he crosses the bridge and all the sudden a beautiful girl is in front of him with his dog and hes like. Thats my dog. And shes like no its my dog wtf also youre in the land of the fae and if your dog crosses back over he'll die immediately so he needs to stay here and besides i love him so much. The son very quickly realizes that hes like mega fucked and hes standing in front of a faery princess and shes so so beautiful and she has his favorite dog. And because that shit used to fly hes like Well if you marry me and come live at my home you can have the dog and shes like yayyyy okay <3 so they get married and some years pass and they have a baby. At that point shes like i have to return to my people bc im a princess and they need me but im leaving our son with you. Take care of him or im going to be so mad. Then off she goes and the macleods have a banquet to cheer the son up (its not working) and the nursemaid slips off to have a drink and a bit of chat, as one does. The baby kicks off the blankets though because hes a baby and the window is open so he gets cold and he starts to cry. Now the princess is all the way in the realm of the fae but she hears him crying and flys over to the castle into her sons room. And objectively hes well taken care of so shes not really mad. Besides, she loves her human husband and the baby, so she just tucks her son in with a scarf or something of hers. At this point the nursemaid comes in and is like oh shit youre back? And the wifes like not really but keep the blanket ive wrapped him in because if you wave it you can either cure a cattle plague or summon extra fighters in battle. Also you can only wave it three times so like be choosy about it. And then she disappeared and was never seen again but the baby grew up to be a valued member of the clan and whatnot. And supposedly my mothers side of the family is that faery babys descendants. The story is up for dispute as all folktales are but the fairy flag is real u can look it up 👍

[beautiful-songbird]

Smoke and Mirrors

Pairing: Idol!Tae x Model!OC

Genre: angst, fluff

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: suggestive, smoking, multiple mentions of sex, mention of emotional breakdowns, the characters both have negative feelings about smoking and actively discourage it so be warned if that triggers you?

Summary: Tae and Zelda have a long overdue conversation after she finds him smoking.

Zelda stepped out onto the deck, letting the door click shut behind her. Tae let out a huff of air that was mingled with smoke before glancing back at her.

“Hi,” he muttered, flicking at the cigarette in his hand.

“Hi there. Why are you hiding?”

He smiled wryly. “Didn’t want to smoke in the house.”

“Hm.” She crossed the deck and wrapped her arm around his waist, leaning into his side. “Why is this the first time I’m finding out about this, then?”

“I think you know why,” he responded quietly. “You’ve made it pretty clear you don’t like it when people smoke.”

He settled his arm over her shoulders then, accepting the fact that she wasn’t going to leave.

“I don’t. That doesn’t mean I’m going to get upset with you for doing it, though.”

“Really?”

She glanced up at him. “Tae.”

He glanced down at her.

“You don’t have to feel guilty about it.”

He hummed before taking in another breath of smoke before blowing it out his nose. “I just don’t like doing it,” he replied finally. “I know it’s bad. I just…can’t stop.”

“I know.”

“You do?”

She nodded. “My grandma smokes. She’s been trying to quit for as long as I can remember.”

“Is that why you don’t like it?”

She smiled sadly. “It’s not good for you, Tae. That’s why I don’t like it.” She poked his chest. “I’d like to have a husband for a long time.”

He chuckled.

“You haven’t done it before when we’ve been together. Why not? I mean…you didn’t even do it when we were on our honeymoon.”

He combed his fingers through her hair. “Because. I was always ok when we were together. And…we were never together for very long.”

“But two weeks ago?”

He hummed. “I got my dopamine in other ways.”

“Does it help?”

He glanced at her again. “The cigarettes?”

“Sex.”

“Ah,” he smiled. “Yes. It’s too much to ask of you every time I need it, though.”

“Is it?” she frowned.

He didn’t respond, choosing to simply continue staring at her.

She motioned at his hand. “Can I take it?”

He hesitated.

“You can say no.”

He shook his head. “I can always light another one if I need it.”

He flipped it around in his fingers and handed it to her. She dropped it to the ground and dug her heel into it. Then she hugged him tightly, resting her head against his chest. His breathing was steady, like he hadn’t just been inhaling smoke.

“You ok, Zel?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah. I love you.”

“I love you too,” he smiled.

She looked up at him then. “You still need something?”

“Yeah,” he replied softly. “Is that ok?”

“Of course. I wouldn’t have asked if it wasn’t.” She stood on her tiptoes then, leaning up to kiss him. “Eugh.” She pulled away from him.

He chuckled. “Don’t like the taste of smoke?”

She smacked her lips in distaste. “Not really.”

“I’ll go brush my teeth,” he replied, patting her butt.

She kissed his cheek. “Ok. Let’s meet in the bedroom. I’ll toss your cigarette.”

He chuckled. “Thanks.”

After he left the deck, she picked the cigarette up off the concrete. She glanced over at the table, just now noticing that a pack of cigarettes was laying on it. She picked it up and tucked it in her pocket before heading inside.

Inside, she headed straight for the kitchen before dousing the cigarette in water, digging her nails into its burnt end to make sure it had been fully soaked. Then she threw it in the trash. She pulled the pack of cigarettes out of her pocket then. She faintly recalled a time when he’d pulled a lighter off his keychain to light some candles, and at the time the only thought that had passed through her head was how hot it was that he just carried a lighter around with him. Who did that? She knew now. He’d been carrying it around to light his cigarettes with. She frowned.

She half-heartedly wondered why he’d never brought it up before. They’d been together for two and a half years, and he hadn’t as much as even hinted about it. It saddened her to know he’d thought he had to hide something like this from her. To her, it was simply a struggle he dealt with, and yet he’d been so ashamed that he’d never even told her.

Was it because of what she’d said? She knew what he’d meant when he’d mentioned her disapproving of it. They’d been on a date once, and the smell of smoke had filled the air. She’d coughed before simply stating, “I wish people wouldn’t smoke.” She could imagine now how much that had stung him.

It didn’t really make sense to her, though. He’d dealt with so many of her issues, and yet, now that she thought about it, he’d never shared his own. He’d dealt with her melting down and practically screaming, so how could he think this was worse than that?

It was just a cigarette…or hundreds. But it wasn’t everything she’d done. She could tell just from the look on his face when he’d seen her that he’d been disappointed in himself. Was that it? Had he not wanted her to be disappointed too?

She found herself in the bedroom a moment later, setting the pack on his nightstand. She was sure there were others in his drawer, and that’s why he’d been so careful about her getting into it, but she didn’t want this to be a secret between them anymore, so she didn’t place it where it would be hidden.

“Zel, come here. I need to know if I did a good enough job brushing.”

She laughed and joined him in the bathroom, where he was quick to kiss her.

She hummed. “Taste like mint now. Not much of an improvement.”

He laughed. “Still not a fan of mint?”

“It’s better than smoke,” she offered.

“Good enough?”

“I can live with it.”

“You’re just teasing me now,” he whined, tugging her towards him.

“I am,” she smiled as their lips met again.

He groaned against her mouth, making her grin. She grasped his shoulders gently.

“Tae.”

“Mm?” He hummed against her mouth.

She pushed him away ever so slightly, just enough that she could look him in the eye.

“Tae.”

“Yes?” he asked, brow wrinkling.

“I love you.”

He smiled. “I love you too.” He pecked her lips again.

“Hm,” she pressed on his shoulders again. “No.”

“Oh?” he asked, his face falling.

“I love you.”

He licked his lips, pout still on his face. “I know.”

She cupped his cheeks in her hands. “I’m not disappointed in you. You know that, right?”

“Yeah,” he responded, voice cracking.

“You don’t need to be perfect for me.”

He nodded slowly, tears welling in his eyes.

“Do you?” she asked softly. “Because you seem to have this idea that you can’t have any issues.”

He sniffed. “I’m scared,” he admitted.

“Of what, honey?”

“That I’m going to finally show you who I am and you won’t like me anymore.”

She thumbed at his tears. “And who are you?”

“I don’t know. I’m weak. I can’t be strong for you if you know everything.”

She tilted her head slightly. “I think you can. I think together we can be stronger if we both rely on each other.”

“But my problems aren’t as big as yours,” he cried softly.

“Are you sure? Because I think they are. And besides, it doesn’t matter how big our problems are, it matters that we struggle with them. I can’t hold your hand through it all if I don’t even know what it all is.”

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled quietly. “It’s just hard. No one wants this side of me.”

“And no one wants to be with me when I have a meltdown,” she answered. “So why do you do it?”

“Because I love you,” he replied like it was the most automatic thing in the world.

She smiled, eyes watery. “So why can’t I handle you then, huh? Why do you smoke?”

“Because…because sometimes it’s the only thing that will calm me down.”

“Right. So how can I not handle that when you’ve dealt with me screaming?”

He couldn’t help but cry then, tucking his head against her hair. “Because the emotions aren’t your fault. It is my fault that I smoke,” he whispered against her forehead.

“Honey, it doesn’t matter how you got addicted. If it’s not something you want to do, it’s not your fault.”

“But sometimes I do want it,” he admitted. “It makes me feel good. It’s fun. I…I enjoy it.”

“Of course you do, hon. It gives you a hit. That’s what drugs do. They make you feel good so you’ll want to take them again. That’s not your fault.”

She could feel his tears soaking into her hair now, and she couldn’t help but frown over how broken up he was about this. She didn’t blame him for any of it. She couldn’t. She knew it wasn’t his fault, and this was enough to tell her for sure he didn’t enjoy the addiction.

“I love you,” she reminded him again. “Please don’t be mad at yourself. You’re not hurting anyone but yourself. That’s more than I can say about me.”

“You don’t…hurt me,” he sniffed.

“I do,” she replied softly. “I’ve seen the look on your face when I’ve yelled at you. Don’t tell me it doesn’t hurt you. I know it does.”

He frowned. “I…yeah.” He drew in a deep, shaky breath. “But I can’t blame you. I know how much you hate yourself when it’s all over.”

She simply reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, unwilling to say anything to what he’d said.

“Zel.”

“Mm?”

“I’ll forgive myself if you forgive yourself first.”

“That’s not a fair trade and you know it.”

“I didn’t ask if it was fair.”

“Tae…this conversation isn’t about me.”

“Yes it is. We’re dealing with our issues - both of us. You can’t keep blaming yourself for emotional outbursts that are out of your control. I know it hurts me, but I know you’ve tried your hardest.”

“Tae,” she grumbled.

He hummed and leaned his cheek against the top of her head. “You said you wanted to hold my hand. I want to hold yours too. Holding hands isn’t a one-way street, Zel.”

“I can’t forgive myself, Tae,” she said finally.

“Why not?”

“Because I’ve been awful to you.”

“Zelda.”

“I don’t care if…if I can’t control it. I hate it, and I hate that I’ve put you through it.”

He let out a big sigh. “I know. And I hate how upset I made you today.”

“I’m not upset.”

“You’re not upset with me. I know you’re upset though, darling.”

She squished her face against his chest.

“You’re upset because you think you’re going to lose me. I scared you.”

She swallowed hard, tears finally starting to really pool in her eyes. “I am.”

“So can we just agree…that we’ve both hurt each other with things that were out of our control? And forgive ourselves?”

She nodded slowly, and he smiled.

“Ok. Good. You forgive my pretty wife?”

She giggled. “Yes. And you forgive my handsome husband?”

He grinned. “Yes.”

She pushed herself away from him then so she could look up at him. “Good. But…you have to promise me that if you need me in the future you just tell me. Don’t go smoke as your first resort. If I’ve done everything I can for you and you still need it, that’s ok, but please ask me first.”

“You’re sure?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“You’re sure sure?”

She poked his chest. “Tae. I enjoy having sex with you. This is not a sacrifice for me.”

He smiled, licking his teeth. “I know. I just don’t want you to say yes just because you don’t want me smoking.”

“I’ll say no if I need to, Tae, you know that.”

He nodded.

“Good. Now that we have that sorted out….”

She tasted his grin against her mouth as she pulled him into a kiss a moment later.

“Mmm. Can’t taste the mint as much anymore,” she mumbled. “Tastes more like you.”

He grinned again, their teeth nearly knocking together. “You like that?”

“‘Course,” she replied. “Why’d you think I married you?”

He pulled away from her. “Oh, you think you’re funny?”

She grinned.

“You do! You thought that was funny!” He heaved her up into his arms. “I’ll show you funny.”

He was gently tossing her on top of their sheets a moment later, caging her in. He wiggled his thumbs under her shirt, stroking the soft skin of her belly as he nibbled at her neck. The sensations were making her giggle.

“Mhm, told you it was funny,” he mumbled, simply making her giggle even more.

“I love you, Tae.”

He hummed against her neck before pressing a soft kiss against it. “I love you too.”

She laced her fingers together, settling her hands behind his neck. “What would you like to do?”

He drew in a deep breath and rested his cheek against her shoulder. “I don’t know. I mean…” he stroked his fingers along her stomach. “I do, but…you know.”

She giggled. “Well, you’ve got me for the rest of the day. Whatever you need.”

He grinned and nosed his way down to her collarbone. “I suppose we’ll see, then.”

This is part of the Dad!BTS series that can be found here

A/N: I’ve been debating posting this for a few days and I decided eh what the hell why not 😂 so…yeah 🤪

It would be greatly appreciated if you reblogged the story if you liked it!

Taglist: @jiminie-and-his-pinky-finger @jinnie-forthe-winnie @thornedswan @fly-you-dam-fools @aianloveseven @kookstempo @lvoekook

[memento-morianon]

WIP Wednesday

@creators-club

I've been very busy with an illustration project on a time limit, but I have managed to write a little bit of my next rough draft chapter.

check out my masterpost of rough draft excerpts too

character context for those who haven't read the previous excerpts: K'arik is a deaf orc, Evarin is mostly a gnome but has an orcish grandma, and Morianon is a bird dude who's also half elf. Mori and Evarin are married, K'arik is their queerplatonic companion and also Evarin's third cousin. He is preparing for an important spiritual magic ritual.

---

It was a quiet evening, stilled by the rain that had come and gone all week. Evarin stood on a bench behind K'arik, pulling his hair into a simple braid while Morianon helped him with the ceremonial strands of carved bone arranged on leather strings, tying them around his arms and waist and neck. K'arik kept his breath slow, kept his eyes focused. The only sound in the whole room was the click of bone beads, the soft crackle of the hearth fire, and the light whispers of K'arik's family as they prepared to accompany him to the ritual.

"Mori, pass me the tusks," Evarin said, holding out a hand. He handed them up to her and she carefully tied them into the top of the braid, pulling their leather strap through K'arik's hair and looping it around until she was sure it wouldn't come loose. Aside from the beaded strands and the tusks in his hair, K'arik only wore a simple robe of elk hide which he could easily remove.

"Done," Morianon signed with a smile. K'arik nodded and got to his feet, taking his bone knife from the table and tying it to one of the straps around his left wrist.

"It is an honor to have you both with me tonight," he signed, then gently touched their cheeks. Evarin kissed his fingers.

"And we are honored to be here," she replied. She hopped off the bench to join her husband. K'arik's family walked with them as they left the building; only his parents and siblings would be in attendance, while his other relatives helped prepare the morning feast to celebrate.

The sky was still tinged with a faint pink behind the trees, but the moons were rising overhead, almost parallel to the arc. A few orcs were standing at the fire pit in the center of the village, chopping fresh wood. They nodded silently to K'arik and his family as they passed by. Entering the [spiritual building], they were met by the clan elders who ushered them inside and closed the heavy hide curtain behind them.

"Welcome, welcome," one of the elders signed, "everything is ready." He gestured to the back of the room, where an altar had been set up in front of the grand mural that depicted their ancestors, some of whom were also present as carefully cleaned skulls looking over the room. Evarin swept her gaze over their empty sockets, resisting the urge to count them and guess which of them had been her own direct ancestors; her and K'arik's shared great-great grandparents.

K'arik walked forward to the altar while everyone else hung back a few paces. Laid out over the altar was a panel of tattooed leather, on which sat a few large bones and the upper part of an orc skull; all freshly cleaned. K'arik knelt and kissed his grandfather's skull, pressing his snout gently against its forehead.

[midwesterngothicmomus]

in Norse Grandma Addition

Why did they defend Loki's child? You would think Frigg would want her dead and so.

This is long so I put it under a cut but TLDR: It's their job as Odin's wives and not doing so would create a bad precedent.

Jörð fostered Loki. Nominally she is the closest thing to a mother for him, so she expands a certain amount of care to all his children. She is also Odin's wife and as Odin's wife, she has a duty of care toward any children of his house, which Percy counts as because Loki is Odin's sworn brother and lives in his house. Additionally, she has strong feelings about Poseidon thinking he can just attack a child in their house and get away with it and just wants to crack his skull open since she thinks he raped Loki (who she did help raise).

Frigg is effectively the second in command of Odin's house. She manages its internal affairs and its public image to an extent. Even if she does not like Loki, as a wife (and yes this is a dated belief but she is an old Norse woman) she has to follow her husband to an extent. One of the things Odin is constantly pushing for in my fic is for the family to appear united to outsiders so it would be extremely bad if she let an assault like this pass without doing anything. It would discredit her as a wife, expose discord in the nose pantheon, and give others the impression that if they attack children of the Norse pantheon they won't be punished which is not something she can allow to happen as the main hostess. So Frigg will, at least for appearance's sake, make sure Percy has whatever she needs. It's literally her job as Odin's main wife and the person who manages the house's finances, regardless of her feelings about Loki.

Gunnlöð does not care about Loki one way or another. He is an adult who can take care of himself. She'll defend him if she sees him being attacked because he is part of Odin's house. For Percy, she defends her because Percy is a child who can't fight and Gunnlöð has strong feelings about that.

Gríðr actually feels indebted to Loki because she has used his skills to get her hands on rare research materials before, so naturally she doesn't want to alienate him. On a more practical note (and her bio will talk about her relationship with Odin more), she is Odin's wife, and doing what he wants is her job. Since he wants Percy safe then she will step in.

Rindr does not care for Loki but she knows Poseidon raped him so, as a fellow rape victim she wants to hurt Poseidon. It's not like she can hurt Odin after all (he's her husband, she has attitudes from her time), but Poseidon is fair game, and he showed up to kill his own daughter so she wants to hurt him because she thinks he is the worst.

So in summary, Percy is Loki's daughter and a child of Odin's house so as such she is entitled to be defended in said house. Not doing so would make the Norse look weak to other pantheons which Odin would hate so, regardless of personal feelings, Percy will always be well cared for by the Norse.

[dark9896]

AITA for going Scorched Earth against my Uncle?

So I have been going through a thing, a repeating pattern with a once-close family member. Specifically an uncle who is a year older than me. He has a history of playing nice for a short while, or doing a "favor" for me then turning into a complete dictator. And by dictator, I mean giving me an ultimatum and getting ultra pissy if I ever say 'no'.

A couple months ago, K (younger uncle, mentioned above), J(older uncle and brother of K), A (mutual friend), M (other mutual friend), C (husband), B (third mutual friend who hasn't been able to join since session 1), and I started making weekly DND sessions at my house. 2-3 hours a week after work with very few things that could stop us from meeting up.

The first few weeks were perfectly fine, then K starts bringing up things to A (who's running the sessions as DM) and me. Some of the things are reasonable like not revealing sensitive background info that the players are keeping to themselves and/or passing through notes. Others were a little less reasonable; like demanding another player be told they have to play a certain way (which A did research and follow up on, overridding K's demands). Soon K and J were being extremely quiet during sessions, causing A to pull croc teeth to get them to say what they wanted to do.

Now after some other personal family drama (completely reasonable worry) K is making demands that I put away my dog (who is kept in a crate while C and I are at work) so they can bring grandma over while we play DND (she just went through some serious medical problems and definitely need 24/7 care). I suggested both remote play (which is difficult and not nearly as fun) and going to the local park so we can all watch both grandma and the pupper.

However, both suggestions were completely shot down by K and its the last fucking straw. This is not the first time he has tried to control what I do (especially when playing DND) but it is the last. I have already made up my mind that he will no longer be allowed inside my house, he will not be welcomed to when I do any DM'ing campaigns (I will never tell someone else what to do or how to run their games outside of gentle suggestions for fair rules). And I do truly mean he is not welcomed in my house, for any reason at all. No family gatherings where he is invited will be held at my house, no game nights, nothing. To be clear, I'm not cutting him out completely, just putting my foot down about his current behavior.

TLDR; Uncle is trying to control my house for DND and I am putting my foot down, refusing to allow him inside my house.

[shegatsby]

The Last of Us

Warnings; Post apocalyptic world. SMUT! P in v, unprotected sex, don't be silly wrap your willy. Angst, slow burn.

Will the reader go with Joel and Ellie or stay at Jackson?

Words; 3.107K

A/N; Hi guys! Smut is here but its kinda sad. English isn't my native language so apologies on advance. Enjoy.

TAG LIST IS OPEN!

Summary; Ever since childhood you had to survive, you were born before the disease so you kinda remembered what was it like, to have a hot shower, clean food etc. You didn’t know what happened to your parents because they were on a vacation and left you with your grandma who passed away during the chaos. You were 10 when it happened, a child who had to be a woman over night. What happens when you are a brink from killing yourself and find purpose again?

Chapter Seven- One Night

‘’We settled here about 7 years ago.’’ Maria was giving the history of the town which called Jackson, as they were walking Y/N noticed that people were looking at them with curiosity in their eyes. They had school, laundry, gardens to grow fruit and vegetables, maybe her dream was becoming true, she liked teaching back at Boston QZ until FEDRA stopped her. She had this stupid idea that Maria and other people in Jackson would want them there, well, what’s humanity without hope persevering.

They had a barn for the horses they ride and the sheep they have, ‘’Hey Joel, check it.’’

Maybe the universe was finally granting their wishes. As Ellie was petting the baby horse Shimmer, Y/N was listening to Maria explaining how things run here,  Maria turned to her husband Tommy ‘’Well, I’m sure they would like a shower, some new clothes. We can put them in the empty house cross the street from us.’’

Joel seemed uncomfortable with things being given to him freely, he wasn’t use to that.

‘’Yeah. It’s a decent place. Pretty much untouched since ’03, but it’s got heat goin’ in it. Could do worse.’’ With the news of heat in a house Y/N was over the moon, so many things she used to have were now luxury.

‘’Trust me, we have been.’’ Ellie said looking at Joel and Y/N for support, ‘’We’ve been doin’ fine.’’ Joel immediately responded, it had been months ever since she met him and she was figuring him out, Joel was a father back then, and being a parent stuck to him, he enjoyed protecting his clan and providing, taking care of things and Jackson represented all the things he couldn’t give to them, to his new found family. He felt little in front of his baby brother, ‘’Yes, we’ve been doing fine but thank you again, for the hospitality.’’ Y/N had this instinct to be on Joel’s side all the time even if he was wrong.

Maria took Y/N and Ellie to their new house while Joel and Tommy went to talk. The house looked normal, two stores, as soon as they walked in they were welcomed by the heat, Maria left them alone to settle, she said they should visit her when they were done. Tommy was true, the house was untouched since forever, it looked cozy with comfortable chairs and yellow light, ‘’Let’s find the kid’s bedroom and you can shower there.’’ Y/N said as they climbed the stairs, ‘’And you’ll shower at parents’ bedroom with Joel.’’ Ellie said with a sarcastic tone and a smirk on her thin lips, she wasn’t stupid. ‘’Ha ha very funny.’’ They found the room, Maria’s people placed clothes for Ellie on the bed, ‘’See you in a bit.’’ And Y/N left her to find the parents’ bedroom, it was normal, big bed with two side tables that had lamps, a brown wardrobe, she found new clothes on the bed. A red sweater, jeans, new boots, underwear etc. She hit the shower immediately, the last time she got a hot shower was at Bill and Frank’s house and that was months ago. Her body welcomed the heat willingly, there were several choices of shampoo and body conditioners and thanks the gods above she found razors! Maybe the night they talked about what they would do manifested itself. As she covered herself with a brown towel and leaving the shower she heard some footsteps but thought it was Ellie. Her hair was damp and loose, her body smelled like the rose scented body wash and she walked into the bedroom finding Joel sitting at the edge of the bed, looking defeated. It was obvious that something was bothering him as soon as they stepped foot on the Jackson. ‘’Hi!’’ she said with a nervous tone, ‘’I’m-‘’ he looked to meet her eyes, ‘’I’m sorry, I was waiting for you to finish-‘’ he was mumbling, she could see the blush creeping on his beautiful face, ‘’Its okay.’’ She was holding the towel she was in with one hand, ‘’Look, they left clothes for us. No offence but please throw the old ones away.’’ She smiled gently and Joel stood up, almost crashing his lips onto hers, the thought of it made his heart beat faster, ‘’I should take a shower.’’ He said and walked past her, smelling the rose scent on her, his mind went to the roses he had in his garden back at Austin Texas, Sarah loved growing flowers.

When Y/N heard the water she got dressed and left the bedroom, found Ellie to visit Maria and Tommy’s place. Their house was right across and the white door was unlocked so they walked in. The fire place was lit, there were books and candles on the coffee table, blankets on the couch, Y/N imagined the happy couple curling up with their books by the fire place, she wondered if she could experience that kind of love.  There was a memorial on top of the fire place for two people called Kevin and Sarah, they thought those were Maria’s children, how they were wrong.

Maria came through the kitchen door which led to their back yard. She brought two coats for Ellie and Y/N, she wasn’t sure if Maria was doing this because she was a kind woman or because of Tommy, either way Y/N was over the moon. As Maria was cutting Ellie’s hair they were talking. They learned that Sarah was Joel’s daughter, it broke Y/N’s heart because she looked at when the day Sarah died, it was on the outbreak, she probably got bit or someone killed her, death of his daughter explained why he was like this. So many questions on her mind were answered.

Maria didn’t forget to warn them about Joel but Y/N and Ellie already heard his reputation back at the QZ, they went to the movies together. At first Y/N thought that Maria was joking, there wasn’t a movie theater but they made place for people to watch movies, they had a white screen and a projector, Y/N was with the adults at the back watching while Ellie was with the kids, sitting. Ellie kept looking at her back to see Y/N, every time she smiled and waved at her, clearly she had trust issues and Y/N was there to make sure that Ellie was heard and seen. Later Ellie said she wanted to explore, at first Y/N wasn’t sure but Maria reassured her, ‘’I’ll be at home, if anything goes bad just ran home and find me okay?’’ Y/N whispered in her ear so that Maria wouldn’t hear. Ellie nodded and left, later Y/N excused herself and walked to her new home. After living in that disastrous apartment this was a palace, whenever she remembered the QZ she had to relive her last day there, she almost killed herself and ready to leave this world, if it wasn’t for Joel she wouldn’t be here, of course coming here wasn’t an easy trip but Y/N, after years of solitude she felt like she had a purpose, keeping Ellie safe and taking care of two people who became so close to her that lately she couldn2t imagine a world without them.

It was a tiring day so climbed the stairs to bedroom to sleep, she didn’t forget to leave few lights on for Joel and Ellie, she found a long t-shirt in that wardrobe and wore it as a pj and carried her tired body to bed, as soon as her head hit the soft pillow she fell asleep.

What woke her up was the loud noises coming from Ellie’s bedroom, she woke up with a rush of adrenalin and run out of the bedroom, Ellie’s room was close to the stairs and hers was down the hall, just few steps. She didn’t have to walk in because she heard only Joel and Ellie, no one else so they weren’t under attack. 

‘’You’ll be way better off with Tommy.’’ Joel was explaining his decision and Y/N was silent, listening to them.

‘’Do you give a shit about me and Y/N or not?!’’ Ellie didn’t forget to include her too, ‘’Of course I do.’’ They were yelling at this point, she wanted to barge in and stop it but it wasn’t her place, they had to figure this out on their own. ‘’Then what are you so afraid of? I’m not her you know?!’’

Y/N’s hand went to cover her mouth, Ellie shouldn’t have brought Sarah into this, ‘’I’m sorry about your daughter Joel, but I’ve lost people too.’’

‘’You have no idea what loss is.’’ Joel’s unusual tone sent icy shivers to her spine, Ellie was on thin ice, ‘’Everybody I have cared for has either died or left me. Everybody, fucking except for you and Y/N!’’

Y/N was waiting impatiently for Joel to break his silence, she knew he was a stubborn man who would never back off from his decision, ‘’Now, come dawn we’re goin’ our separate ways.’’

Y/N was standing there, shocked to hear his words as Joel left Ellie’s room and slammed the door shut, she flinched, Joel saw her standing there, hair loose and in a long t-shirt, he quickly regret what just happened, he didn’t want her to see him like this but he couldn’t undo it, the damage was done. He walked to their shared bedroom, what surprised her was that he didn’t close the door, was this an invitation? Y/N hesitated at first but she had to talk to him, he couldn’t just treat Ellie like this. She walked to the bedroom, closed the door behind her, ‘’Care to explain your decision with me too or am I suppose to find out myself?’’ this was the first time she was confronting him, he was standing, back facing her, ‘’You heard.’’ His answer angered her even more, ‘’So you’re gonna ditch us. Perfect.’’ She kept her voice low so that Ellie wouldn’t hear her. Joel turned to face her, a deep frown, a sudden light in his eyes, a light that Y/N couldn’t put a finger on, ‘’I have to leave you. This is for your own good.’’ He was speaking as if he rehearsed his speech, ‘’And why is that Miller?!’’ he couldn’t believe the fire she had, usually she was so calm and gentle, seeing her like this.. he liked it. He took a step closer to her, ‘’Why can’t you understand woman?! I’m not capable of protecting you any longer, I can’t.’’ he paused to say something, thought better and stopped, he wanted to scream at her ‘’I cannot afford to lose you!’’ but he couldn’t do it, unbidden tears came to her all at once, there were mere inches between them so with all the force she had she pushed him with both hands, well, it didn’t make him move but the point was made, she turned to leave but Joel found himself grabbing her arm to stop her. She frowned, questioning him, ‘’Don’t’’ he whispered gently, ‘’Don’t go.’’ He pulled her towards his torso, ‘’Give us a one good night.’’ He was begging. Ever since he saw her for the first time at the QZ he couldn’t stop thinking about her. She kept consuming his thoughts and spending months together, sleeping close to each other, watching her take care of them didn’t help at all. He had to have her all for himself tonight, he only wished for his feelings to be mutual. Her head pressed his torso, she could feel how frantic his breathing was, his big hands went to her back, hugging her. She lifted her gaze to meet his dark ones, there was a silent agreement, tonight was theirs and tomorrow he was leaving her, with a broken heart she lifted herself to match his height to kiss him.

The kiss was a relief, all those lost opportunities during the time they spent together came crushing down, Joel eagerly kissed her back, his hands went to her ass cheeks and he cupped them with a sudden force which made Y/N to open her mouth and moan in pleasure, it drove him crazy. He just wanted to slam her against the wall and take her but he wanted to savor her, he wanted to remember this for the rest of his life. Her hands went to his face, gently caressing, his beard tickling her palms, their bodies seemed glued to each other, she pulled back to breath, it was too much. She thought she would see regret in his dark eyes but all she found was desire, she was glad. ‘’Do you want this?’’ Joel asked, his forehead against hers, ‘’Yes, please-‘’ the way she begged triggered something in him and his hands went to lift her oversized t-shirt, she was naked underneath, he liked what he saw. Y/N could feel a sudden shyness creeping to her face but she kept calm, let him look at her up and down, he was a man starved, her hands went to her green plaid shirt, their movements got quicker the seconds past by.

She traced her fingers to the old scars on his broad chest, she wanted to ask him the story of his scars but the desire consumed them together, he stopped her hands when she reached to his jeans, she looked puzzled but Joel guided her to the bed, gently laid her to watch him get undress for her.

It was a sight sore eyes, he was completely naked and she could see how thick he was, should she be nervous?

‘’Spread your legs for me.’’ He said with a low baritone, he spit into his palm and his hand went to his cock, stroking as she spread her legs for him, she was getting wetter and wetter, ‘’Touch yourself.’’ In one of his fantasies Y/N was touching herself like this, Y/N’s one hand went to her slick folds and other to her tit, squeezing, she arched her back with the sensation, Joel was hard as a rock and couldn’t take it any longer. He knelt on the bed between her legs, heavy breaths filled the room, anticipation killed Y/N, she had dreams of this moment for months, Joel rubbed the tip of cock to her wet core, she shuddered in agony, she wanted him inside and quick, ‘’We have to be quiet, can you do that for me darlin’? Can you be a good girl and take it?’’ this new side of Joel surprised her in a good way, she nodded but it wasn’t enough for him. ‘’Use your words sugar.’’ He was still rubbing the tip of his cock and driving her mad with the sensation, ‘’Yes, I’ll do what you say please just fuck me please.’’ Joel was also surprised to see this side of her, chasing after what she demanded, ‘’Good girl.’’ He praised her, ‘’I have to open you up first.’’ He announced and opened her up with his two thick fingers, she had to shut her mouth with her palm to stop herself from moaning loud but the muffled voices made his cock jump in excitement. He fingered her slowly, it had been a while for them since their last sexual encounters, probably years, so Joel was taking it slow, they had the night for themselves.

The wet sounds of her soaked cunt made pumped blood to his cock, his fingers were merciless, giving her pleasure but not there yet. He curled his two fingers and her legs started to shake, she leaned her weight on her elbows so that she could kiss him passionately, ‘’Joel,’’ she said out of breath, ‘’please, I can’t take it any longer..’’

She was ready, more than ready in fact, Joel removed his thick fingers and tasted his fingers, her juice was divine, he wanted to taste her but there was no time. He had to be up and leaving in 5 hours, he shook that thought away. Joel kissed her back and with one of his hand he choked her gently, guided her to lay on her back again, he gently pushed in, tip first, her mouth opened in the shape of O, obviously trying to control herself. He pushed his length fully and this time she couldn’t hold her scream. Joel immediately kissed her swollen lips, Y/N kissed him back her hands scratching his back. Once he was fully in her he let her adjust to his thickness and length, Y/N didn’t want to admit to him but he was the biggest of all the suitors she had. He pulled back and slammed into her again, now she was more comfortable, ‘’You want me to-‘’ Joel again wanted her consent to keep going, ‘’Just fuck me please.’’ Her reply gave him confidence. Her legs hugged his hips, with every thrust her nails digging into his back, he didn’t forget to give her multiple hickies so that she would remember him for a while, maybe it was selfish but he didn’t care. Skin slapping to each other and their moans added to their pleasure, Joel almost came when he hit a spot in her, it was spongy and both of them could feel the effect on each other, she knew that the next few days her body would be sour. His head was at the crook of her neck, sucking the skin, her hand was pulling his gorgeous hair. ‘’Fuck-‘’ Joel cursed, ‘’I’m gonna come.’’ He said, ‘’Your pussy is so tight, milkin’ me so good.’’ He just wanted to came in her, in his sick fantasies he was having kids with Y/N and living together for the rest of his life, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad… he pulled out before he came and jerked himself off on her stomach. Their bodies covered in sweat, chests raising and falling. Joel knew she didn’t came so he did something he desperately wanted to do. He went down on her. Since she was already close it was short but he get to eat that pussy like a man starved. Her soft lips and sticky juice drove him mad, his tongue hitting all the right spots, at first she was going to stop him from doing it but once he licked her pussy her eyes rolled back at her skull and she could swear that she saw galaxies when she came undone.

They laid next to each other, panting heavily. ‘’Y/N-‘’ Joel wanted to talk to her but she stopped him, ‘’Don’t.’’ she turned to him, ‘’Let’s just sleep. We have only one night.’’

Tag list;

@psychomanias

@stitchattacks

@anxiousbeech

@elmontsmile

@cheyxfu

@mushroomelephant

@avengersheart

Thank you for reading. :) 💜

[eclipsecrowned]

🚩 // @everlived

We're getting down to my capital c Controversial opinions now. Y'all have driven me to this. And I am not sorry for what I'm about to say.

I see the resurgence of darkfic and romances as a sign we need to back off the moral puritanism, actually. If it's to the point that fandoms populated by teenagers are openly writing content that I don't think a kid their age should be aware of, then we as the standard-setters of fandom have failed.

Darkfic and romance is not endemic of some great moral failing or anti-SJ movement. Historically, it's a way to cope with sexuality in a way that does not court shame or judgment.

You know that bit about how all our grandmas had those bodice ripper Harlequins full of Dukes or Sheikhs with rippling abs who abduct our fair lady protagonist and prove Hull's hypothesis correct? You know how our grandmas also didn't have the right to divorce their husbands unless they wanted to be social pariahs? Same maxim here. When sexuality is demonized and narrowed to a very specific, thin margin of acceptability, dark content arises as 'have your cake and eat it too.'

Oh, the protagonist is having sex, but she's not a slut or anything, it's being foisted upon her by an older, more attractive man who will eventually make it right by falling in love with her. It's a way to approach sexuality and its exploration in a way that gets a pass from the moral guardians. At this point, fandom is the moral guardian over fic, and the more we push back against sexuality or say only certain kinds of relationships can be explored without some thirty year old ignoring her kids to post about anime online screaming that you're some kind of monstrous pervert, the more we drive people towards this.

And like obviously if a fic is harmful via misinformation, poor representation, being marketed at an inappropriate age group, or used to fetishmine, by all means call it out. But don't think that everyone who writes questionable content is some kind of monster because you defined everyone who writes anything past a 13k slowburn coffee shop AU as such. You created this beast. Starve it out. Let people be weirdos on the internet in healthy ways and I promise this will taper off.

And even if it doesn't, block and move the fuck on.

[petalboundtovanish]

Wtf was the nightmare i just had. It will be disturbing so have caution while reading it

This famous actor turned out to be my cousin's husband. They had a daughter and we were at a birthday party. But the dance number he did with her was super inappropriate and sexual. So i interrupt the show to yell at him for being insane for organizing something like that. But he was really confused. Everyone was. He told me that we should have a nice calm conversation so he can see what he did wrong. No one could see what was so wrong. My entire family started coming up to me and asking me if i was okay. Suddenly, i started getting a really bad headache, so i thought that maybe there was something wrong with me. I went to my weird grandma's room who records everything with a vintage camera (she doesn't exist in real life). And this is where it gets weird.

I suddenly remember that im actually watching a horror movie by this really famous female director and that a scary part is about to start. Meanwhile, i and the protagonist of the movie are rewinding the tape to see what really happened. But strange things are appearing as im watching it. The tape becomes really scary, and i back away from the lens in fear. But as i do, im transported to an alternate reality. I am lying down in bed, and three masked people with screwdrivers are sitting and watching me. I can see behind their white masks that they are grinning. Then, i see a youtube analysis of this part. He's saying that im about to do everything in the wrong order. Instead of checking the masked people and figuring out their deal, i will start running down the stairs, and they will kill me. As soon as the video ends, i can see myself doing exactly that, and im no longer in control of my body, despite trying to save myself because i now also know im about to die. The masked people start the chase. They beat me when they come near me and eventually manage to break my legs. But im still not giving up. I try to escape down the stairs, and as i do, i start falling down the stairs and hitting my head. There is no pain, but i can hear a really horrible banging noise and it scares me Then, im split between two worlds. I can see myself in my reality falling down the stairs, and the injuries coincide with everything that's happening in the other world. The split between worlds ends when i reach the bottom of the stairs, unable to move and dying from the injuries. The stairs were a portal back to my reality, but it was too late. Then, i am no longer myself. I am a daughter, watching my mother fall down and quickly die.

I grew up, and I am pregnant and carrying some laundry when i think of what happened with my mother, and also fall due to shock. I somehow fall into the washing machine and get grievously injured. Then, i am her husband, coming to her because i heard a commotion. When i see her at the stairs/washing machine (they're the same place somehow), i start running, but slip on the vomit from my wife. I pass out for a while, and when i wake up, i see more of that strange mix of vomit and blood, but it is all lumpy and gray. I somehow get up and check the washing machine to see if my family is alright. The door is open. I look inside and see toys, and on top of them, a placenta and more grey blood. I am horrified and thinking that im about to find both my wife and my baby dead. I start digging through the toys, and as i do, im no longer the husband. I am now watching him via the movie. I see a rabbit fall down and then a bunch of gore falling around it. It's finally red. I think it's a beautiful and respectful way to show a baby dying.

I wake up as the wife. I look at my husband and already know what he is about to tell me. I briefly see my real self looking at a wikipedia page about the movie, explaining the plot. Its an intersection of 8 unrelated stories about strange events and the powers that are based around their worlds. But as we watch the movie, we will see how related they actually are. Im scared and dont want to watch the movie anymore, but i have to. I am back to the wife, and my husband is surprised to see me so calm. How did i know i would survive? I smile, and tell him its because my son gave me his eyes and with them his gift. I can tell im about to be forced into another flashback. But i dont see the washing machine incident. I see the wife, and i am her, as the son's gift is slowly driving me insane. I can really know the future, but i also think everything is apples. There is horrible music that makes me unable to think as i look at my arms, and the only thought that manages to escape is how delicious they look. I am recoiling at myself in disgust, and as i do, i finally WAKE UP!!!

I was about to fall asleep again, but I knew that i couldn't do that since i have issues with my nightmares simply continuing when i do that. So, I've been typing this up for the past 30 minutes. I feel a little better now, but im still disturbed. I hope writing this down makes me not dream this stuff again. If anyone actually read this far, i apologise for the grammar mistakes.

[crazy-loca-blog]

Meet My MC (2023 edition)

Late as usual, but otherwise it wouldn't be me 😂 (and I really didn't want to miss @openheartappreciationweek!). Thinking about doing a new version of Meet my MC just because it's been a really long time since the first one I did. I used the same original base template that @jamespotterthefirst shared forever ago, and I added some extra information.

Full Name: Casey Marie Valentine

Nickname: Besides Ethan calling her "Rookie"? None! 

Date of Birth: December 4th

Place of Birth/Hometown: Abingdon, Virginia

Currently lives in: Boston, Massachusetts

Hair: Proud brunette!

Eyes: Green

Parents: Margaret (Maggie) and Thomas (Tom) Valentine

Siblings: Oliver Valentine (her older twin)

Other Relatives: Marie Smith (maternal grandmother); Sean Snith (maternal grandfather)

Love Interest: Ethan Ramsey (husband)

Kids: Three! Gabriella, Simone and Julian

Pets: She inherited her grandma's cat Lola; however, as she couldn't take the cat to Boston with her, her brother takes care of it.

Education: Biology major; Internal medicine / Duke University

Roles over the years: Member of the Diagnostics Team at Edenbrook; head of the Diagnostics Team at Edenbrook; researcher and member of the Diagnostics Team at Edenbrook.

Books: "Paging Dr. Internet", a book inspired on a case she and Tobias solved in her last year of residency. Its main goal was to raise awareness among the medical community and the general population on the dangers of self-diagnosis through Internet searches. She's also been working on a project with Ethan, but it hasn't been released yet.

Personality Traits: Even if she doesn't have trust issues and she doesn't consider herself an introvert, Casey tends to be a very, very private person (she gives Ethan a run for his money) who needs to have her daily alone time to disconnect from the hospital madness. At work, she's a real team player who loves supporting and recognizing her colleagues every time she can. However, when a case gets more complicated than she originally thought, it takes a toll on her mental health. In general, she's someone who forgives, but doesn't forget.

Hobbies: Cooking, reading, listening to music (she hates the fact she's an awful singer and she can't play any instruments because she just adores music).

Curiosity: Despite being twins, she doesn't share her birth date with her brother. Oliver is 10 minutes older than Casey, but he was born before midnight and she was born after midnight.

Casey takes her first name from a variation of her mom’s middle name (Margaret Kacey). She shares her middle name (Marie) with her maternal grandmother.

She doesn’t have any nicknames because grandma Marie HATED them. She always said she had a name for a reason, and that her parents had spent a good amount of time deciding the right name for her.

Her past is as troubled as Ethan's. Her parents died in a car accident when she was 7. After that, the Valentine’s siblings were raised by their grandma Marie, who passed away about a month before Casey began her residency at Edenbrook (her grandpa Sean had passed away when Casey was a baby, he was much, much older than grandma Marie!). So, by the time Casey moved to Boston, it was just she and her brother against the world.

She doesn't keep in touch with her paternal family. After Maggie and Tom's accident, they left town and disappeared of her life. When Casey was in med school, grandma Marie confessed she had tried to reach them several times, but they were no interested in meeting them. So, the twins didn't make any efforts to keep trying to have a relationship with them in their adulthood.

As a teenager, Casey started to realize she had had to grow up too fast after her parents’ accident, so even though she was always surrounded by love, she's always thought she never lived her childhood to the fullest.

She had one of her ovaries removed when she was 16. That's why she actually didn't know if she was going to be able to get pregnant when she and Ethan decided to actually have kids.

Even though Casey had always wanted to become a doctor, she wasn't sure if she was cut for it. Then, she discovered Ethan's book by chance at her local library. She was obsessed with it and started to use it for her own research in the advanced biology class. She got her own copy when grandma Marie gave it to her as a Christmas present. That was the final push to convince her to attend med school.

Casey was really close to give up on her dream of doing her residency at Edenbrook next to Ethan. Her boyfriend at the time was going to move to Los Angeles to try to become a script writer, so she was willing to follow him to do her residency at UCLA.

She claims she didn’t google Ethan during her university years because she didn’t care about him, but only about his book. Then, when she was admitted to Edenbroook, she kept refusing to google him, claiming that “she wanted the knowledge to do all the talking”.

She never thought she was going to stay in Boston after finishing her residency. Her original plan was to move back to her quiet life in Abingdon to work at the local hospital.

She decided not to change her last name after marrying Ethan. It was important for her to keep it because it’s one of the few things she had left from her parents, so it has some great sentimental value. However, she’s not opposed to the idea of taking Ethan’s surname in the future. She knows if she feels ready to take that step, she’ll do it.

[occult-roommates]

A scandal in the spellcasting world

One day, late in the evening, the Rossinis cousins were watching a movie on a channel which airs comedy classic. However, nothing made them feel older than the fact the movie currently airing was "Don't Mess with the Zohan". Then, Dawud joined in, and he got so close to Matteo he clipped into him, and Daniele had to pretend he's fine with that. Please someone come put an end to his misery...

Rudi: DANIELE TURN ON THE TV! PUT ON THE NEWS YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE WHAT JUST HAPPENED DOWNTOWN!! Daniele: WHAT??

Stressed out, he grabbed the remote control and turned on to SMN24 (San Myshuno News 24), only to see a woman he had never heard of in his life make a speech.

Rudi: Listen listen! Daniele: Rud, this cannot be the right news report for the level of urgency in your voice. Rudi: I had to make it crystal clear in order for your autistic ass to understand how much I wanted you to see this. Daniele: Stop saying I'm autistic! Matteo: You're not?! Dawud: Ok but like, never do it like that again. Like...last time someone said with this tone of voice to turn on the news cause something big happened in the San Myshuno downtown, it was the worst terrorist attack in history.

Because none of them were listening, Rudi rewinded until the beginning of the news report. There, a reporter explained only a few days before the upcoming Magic Realm Summit, a human woman had made a revelation that was shocking the spellcasting world at its very core. It then cut to the woman making a speech, what was being shown when they originally changed channel. It was written below "Delfina Baradoz - History teacher".

Delfina: Welcome everyone, my name is Delfina Baradoz. However, nobody but a few people knows me under this name. The name I used to be known as is quite similar. I am better known as Delphine Lorgnez, the so-called dead daughter of Gwenaelle Lorgnez and Giuseppe Paradisi. According to most, I passed away at only five years old, and yet here I am, turning 53 today.

Daniele felt confused. Why would they even lie about their daughter being dead? Surely, this woman had to be doing it for attention. However, he could not deny how much she look like a perfect blend of Gwenn and Giuseppe.

Daniele: But why? Rudi: Back when my dad was alive he had this friend who was obsessed with faking his death...Well, maybe not obsessed, but he brought it up often enough it was sus, especially whenever he was going through stuff. He'd even suggest it to other people. Dawud: I mean, faking your own death is a bit messed up already for your loved one, but forcing someone, a child even, to fake theirs seems even worse. Daniele: Shut up! I'm trying to listen...

Delfina explained she had remained in hiding her entire life. Her parents had found a human couple in Brittany willing to raise her in secret, and she had spent her childhood under the name Christine Cabioch. Once she turned 18, she wanted to change it back to her original name, but realized she actually quite enjoyed being out of the public eyes, unlike her biological parents, and instead picked one that was a nod to her true identity.

Since then, she had a pretty average life, she got married in her early 20s to a human, found a job in Nantes as a high school history teacher, had three kids with no magical abilities and is actually on her way to become a grandma in three months, has a house and a dog, nothing out of the ordinary. Nobody knows who she really is, even her own husband found that out in the last month in preparation for this speech.

Delfina: But why? Why would they do that? As I said, I enjoyed being out of the spotlight, but it is sadly not the reason why they hid me. If that were the case, there were easier solution. No, as you might have noticed, my life has been very human-centric, and the reason is obvious. I am a human...sort of. The older of you might remember a time when my parents were constantly boasting about me, how happy they were to have a daughter, and how much of a powerful spellcastress I was going to be. Then, tragedy struck and my powers were not developping. I was brought to a doctor, who tested me and found out I never will developed any. I was born with a genetic disorder which prevent my body from processing magic properly.

Embarrassed of having a human daughter after constantly claiming his seed (ew) made the most powerful spellcasters, Giuseppe took...a decision. He decided he will fake his daughter's death and hide her. Delfina is not quite sure how he convinced Gwenn to go along with his plan, but he eventually did. One day, they came out claiming their daughter had died in her sleep of a seizure from undiagnosed epilepsy. In order to make sure nobody will ever speak up, they did erase the memories of Delfina and her new parents.

However, Gwenn was never really out of her life and would often come to visit, on top of Delfina constantly hearing about her in the news regarding her weird cult. Then, at 16, she learnt the truth, which obviously messed her up quite a bit. That was the end of the story.

Daniele: No! This is not true!

The spellcaster stood up, unable to believe it. He literally felt mad on behalf of Delfina, but more importantly, he felt weirdly...hurt? He felt weirdly hurt by this.

Rudi: Hey, Dan? You ok? Daniele: This is not true. Giuseppe would never do that. This woman is just an attention seeker who looks like them, hell a human can have blue hair if they have occult ancestry. And she even said herself she changed her name to sound closer to Delphine's name. And how convenient a memory-erasing spell was even involved in her story. Rudi: How would you know he would not do that? You never met him. Daniele: No but...I mean, he's considered a hero to young spellcaster who struggle with magic or developped their power late. Hell, he even used to believe he had the same condition as this woman claims to have! Why would he even treat her the way he was treated by his own family? Well, like, they didn't exactly do that to him, but they were super abusive even by 1900s standard. Rudi: I'm gonna send you the Wikipedia article about the cycle of a abuse. You will find that a fascinating read. Daniele: I still don't understand why he'd do that! He's like...He's my hero...He gave me hope for me, for when my condition will make me lose my power. Maybe I'll find a way to make them comeback, and he's super based like he's pretty much always been on the right side of history, which is saying a lot for a dude who's 123 years old. Rudi: If only you knew the amount of time I found out musician and artist I loved and respected said shitty things about werewolves, even the super progressive one. And the older they are the worse it is cause you know, back then what they were saying was actually socially acceptable. Daniele: So why don't you understand why I'm feeling hurt. Rudi: He doesn't even know you exist Dan! Y'all never even met!

As they say, never meet your hero, that's how you find out they're asshole. Poor Dan, he didn't even got to meet him before finding out he secretly suck.

Prev - Next

[dabacahin]

Snowfall and scissorhands

[I wrote this little memory piece on Christmas Eve ten years ago. Obviously, the world has changed a lot since 2012. My ways of looking at this world have changed, too. But some things remain bittersweetly the same. So here I am again revisiting places in my mind, memories in this blog. Here’s a slightly revised version of that piece for these changed and changing times.]

Edward Scissorhands will always be my Christmas movie, my winter’s tale. It begins on a snowy evening with a little girl being put to bed by her grandmother. She asks, “Why is it snowing, Grandma? Where does it come from?” And the old woman tells her the story of how a strange, lonely creature continues to do his thing—making the most of his solitude by creating ice sculptures, letting the crystal shavings fly out the windows of his castle, showering the world with magic that eventually melts.

But I’m telling this tale the wrong way. I’m loading it with my usual baggage. Loneliness, solitude, impermanence, hmm . . . Let me put it this way instead. Once there was a great inventor who lived alone in a castle on top of a mountain. His grandest design would have been a human being to stand tall among his cookie-cutters, his other gadgets and gizmos. Two hands (you know, those things with fingers, palms, and wrists) would have been his Christmas gifts to Edward, his work in progress. Sadly, before Edward is completed, his maker dies. From then on, the poor unfinished creation has to fend for himself, with crucial parts missing. He is stuck with scissorhands, which can create art and inflict pain.

Nah. That’s not it, either. Director Tim Burton and screenwriter Caroline Thompson would stab me with scissors (or pins or icepicks or whatever comes in handy) to deflate all this so-full-of-myself babble. The truth is, I’m so full of fond memories of this film. Memories of the kind Avon lady (Dianne Wiest) rescuing Edward (Johnny Depp) from that dark castle and taking him home to her family and her neighborhood of gossipy wives and bored husbands. Memories of Edward as a Goth-inspired Charlie Chaplinesque man-child, landscape gardener, hairstylist, sex object, TV celebrity, and town scapegoat. Memories of him as the ultimate Rorschach inkblot test—a blank screen onto which a whole town can project its hopes and fears, ambiguities and contradictions. He’s pure innocence and/or a double-edged sword. He’s a Christ figure and/or the scourge of Satan. He’s Frankenstein’s monster and/or a portrait of the artist as an ageless semi-human.

I’m fond of that scene in which Kim (Winona Ryder), the Avon lady’s teenage daughter, takes a break from decorating the Christmas tree and goes out into the yard to find Edward high up on a ladder, sculpting a huge ice angel. She is thrilled to look up, her arms lifted and palms open to the falling swirls and specks of ice shavings. She dances under this momentary fountain. In Danny Elfman’s glorious music, I hear a chorus of lost souls lamenting all the things that are fleeting. But I also let some of the rapture overflow into my head. Until, as in Edward’s case, it’s time to run back to the dark castle, where I can continue to do my thing—chiseling my way through the cold, hard truths.

Like Edward, we all just want to be loved despite our bad-hair days, our ugly scars, and these hands that can both caress and cut. “You can’t touch anything without destroying it,” Kim’s jealous boyfriend (Anthony Michael Hall) snarls at Edward. Sounds like nature accusing us humans. Or like any self-blaming person looking in the mirror. Like Edward, we sometimes feel like parts of us are missing—we’re incomplete. We yearn for things we never had. Or we’re nostalgic for parts of us we used to have. I know these are not exactly the kind of Christmas sentiments we need right now. I really have to find a better way of telling this story. Or maybe sometimes there is no story to tell. Snow falls, ice melts, the world spins. Time passes, that’s all.

Meanwhile, I think of Edward up there alone. I imagine him still alive, snipping away at chunks of ice to perfect his sculptures or trimming leaves and twigs to shape his topiaries. It’s enough to make me want to open my arms and hold out my hands for remains of ice. Yes, true story: even I have learned to live with what sometimes feels like endless snowfall. As Grandma says in the end, “Sometimes you can still catch me dancing in it.”