#its for you guys and ill do anything to make it better

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

[toytulini]

me, stupidly and weirdly resistant to listening to audio books vs reading a physical book for no real reason: man i wish there was a way to like, read a book while i crochet like i do with tv shows and movies and podcasts

[plulp]

duuuuude oh my god i had to redesign this guy like THRICE because i couldnt get it RIGHT! heres EDEN. for you.

[nomairuins]

i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is

[justablah56]

hmm I think instead of feeling bad I will simply project this bad onto The Character . for funsies .

[triglycercule]

guys i havent written since may (for killer's birthday) but stupid silly swapinverse has been on my mind for a little bit and i threw together this silly (he has a panic attack and throws up) little short draft 4 swapinverse horror!!

-

“hah… ah… oh god… no, no, nonono…”

he ran. sprinted through the forest like a frightened deer, his demeanor that of prey, although his previous actions aligned more of a predator. panting and shaking, his mind cycled through countless variations of how to react to what just happened, what he just did.

how should he react? how could he react? it was impossible to tell for him in the panicked state. and as the trees in snowdin slowly began to surround him (but weren't they always doing that?), paranoia couldn't run anymore. he was surrounded, he was blocked off, he couldn't escape. not from horrortale, not from snowdin, not from the dusty graveyard he had just left it, and not from the blood smeared across his mouth.

“no, i- what did, what did i do? paps, snowdin, even-undick, no, it-”

paranoia’s incoherent rambles brought his hands to wander across his face, tugging at the massive hole in his skull spanning majority of the left side of his head. picking at the chipped bone didn't help, it never did, but a nervous habit was unbreakable, and he was more than nervous in this moment. in fact, quite terrified. everything was terrifying. he was terrifying. and as the slightest hint of red blood touched his sleeve, the once red, now magenta eye quickly locked onto it, and he couldn't hold it back anymore.

“fuck- oh god, no, aliza-!”

falling to his knees, a disgustingly gorey mess of red, pink, and black spilled from his mouth. sounds of retching and hurling were all that filled the empty forest, and paranoia couldn't bear to look down and see the mess he’d made. the mess he’s caused. wasted food, he would've said. but that statement normally only applied to others. he never imagined using it on himself. choking on his spit and certainly not his blood, tears fell from his eye, joining the vomit and blood seeping into the snow. strange. paranoia didn't think he had enough magic to even shed tears anymore. just for the bare necessities. he managed to surprise even himself, after all this time.

but could it be could be considered surprise, or rather terror? he fit up to his name, certainly horrified at his own actions. forcing out as much of the grossness he could that he’d just consumed, paranoia couldn't help but look down at what he’d done.

red. a lot of red. too much red. he’d never been queasy before, never. he had to adapt to it, being the one to hunt down humans that ran or sneak up on those when times got desperate. there was no time or need to be queasy at what he even considered his job before. a duty he had to do.

but now, there was too much red. far too much red. and he didn't know why, although he totally knew, but paranoia couldn't stomach it. he just threw his guts out (shouldn't they be aliza’s guts, or no?), and here he was, wanting to throw up until his SOUL shattered. his SOUL cycled through those strange 4 shapes, unsure of which to settle on. he couldn't blame it. paranoia himself was unsure of what was even going on anymore. he wanted to run, but was frozen. he wanted to scream, but didn't know who at.

everything was contradicting. everything was going on, and not enough was given for paranoia to understand how to deal with it. and with a muttered curse, he flopped on his side onto the somehow dry snow, losing consciousness in the haze of fear now intermingled with his SOUL.

-

ik theres probably grammar mistakes i wrote this on my phone,,,, but like idk. had idea for a little moment in paranoia's lore and i sure as hell didn't wanna draw it so i wrote it as an easier media! god this is so much easier compared to drawing idk why i dont do this more often (because youre lazy silly!) anyways swapinverse silly i love swapinverse. i've only thrown up like never so i dont know if this works. also never had a panic attack (i think) and AGAIN i dont know if this is accurate but whatever i dont write to be good i write for expressing my ideas. like everything i do

[moafleco]

i hate that duality that your mind can be your safe heaven that helps you get through some difficult things, keeps you going and brings you happiness at the worst of times. and at the very same time it could be your worst tormentor that won't let you rest and won't let you breathe, literally for no particular reason at all. and you can't leave or silence it. can't get it to stop when it gets dark in there. can't get the light in when you desperately need to feel a respite instead of suffocation.

[mythesque]

alhaitham and dehya are FRIENDS they are friends THEY ARE FRIENDS they are besties they are F R I E N D S this Is the hill i Will die on

[dhmis-autism]

drawing stuff for valentimes and u all better enjoy it once i finish bc its the sappiest stuff ill ever draw ever

[bingotime]

sad. bitter realization that i am still haunted by people of the past, got recc'd a show a guy i knew really liked and would recommend to me. and i figured i would at some point, but now even the thought makes me irrationally. something. unsure. uncomfortable? bitter? upset? overwhelmed maybe. i want to watch it, but i can't really tear two and two apart. just feels like a punch to the face

[charliesinfern0]

stupid fucking animation software compressing my files to shit for no reason

[haunted-house-heart]

living with someone with untreated mental illness is like. i understand why you're like this and i do empathize but also like. jesus fucking christ get some help before i throttle you i stg

[frostbite-the-bat]

i hgoupe I'm The roller guy to yall

[nomaishuttle]

btw im putting salon trip on my list of things thatll either be christmas present 4 myself birthday present 4 myself or new apartment present 4 myself

[kazumirambles]

THIS.

UNPOPULAR OPINION: Comparing Vil Schoenheit to Trans Characters in Anime, Manga and Games — Forceful pushing of headcanons and why Vil is a better character in canon as a cisgender (gay) male

DISCLAIMER: this essay is aimed at those who find it entirely acceptable to shove their headcanons down others’ throats with the threat of crying wolf (i.e., “if you dislike this hc you’re transphobic”, etc.) should they not comply. For those who simply headcanon Vil as trans and acknowledge that canon and other headcanons can exist with (and without) their approval, this essay is not aimed at you and you are perfectly valid.

Notes: Title may be slightly misleading as there’s really only one comparison, and being a cis character does not necessarily make one “better”. However, given Vil’s character, the mun views that Vil has a far bigger impact in terms of plot, hence the title.

Many of us like to suggest headcanons for our favourite characters, some to make the character even more interesting, others simply to relate to the character further. While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with fun headcanons here and there, the forceful insistence of fans in recent years that their headcanons are absolute to maximise their own comfort has become a glaring issue across many fandoms. In particular, the subject of LGBT+ headcanons has been especially touchy, as minorities use the discrimination against them to their own benefit and, ironically, suppress the opinions of others. One such headcanon is that Vil Schoenheit of Twisted Wonderland is transfemme, or even a trans woman, as he uses the pronoun “atashi” (typically used by women and girls), and is perceived to be traditionally feminine. However, such a headcanon not only fundamentally ignores the very basis of Vil’s character — breaking gender stereotypes as a cisgender white male — but can even be taken as sexist. To prove this controversial statement, a comparison with other notable transgender characters, either confirmed by canon or heavily speculated on by fans, in other anime, games and manga is needed.

First and foremost, the idea that Vil is transfemme or even a trans woman is shallow and unfounded. While Vil indeed uses the pronoun “atashi” in referring to himself, a pronoun typically used by women and girls in Japan, “watashi”, the pronoun that “atashi” is (presumably) deprived from, is a gender-neutral pronoun used by both genders, though for men, both “watashi” and “atashi” are usually used in a casual context by stereotypical feminine gay men or drag queens. Throughout the story, there was absolutely no indication that Vil has issues with his own gender. In fact, it seems to be the very opposite, he is incredibly comfortable and confident in his own masculinity, which is why he has no problem doing things that are traditionally seen as feminine:

“Next, lotion. As guys (lit. with us being high school boys, アタシたち男子高校生), our skin tends to be oilier so applying too much only makes things worse.” (Main Story Chapter 5, translated by j-mee on Twitter)

“There’s no such thing as “men only” or “women only”, whether it’s clothes or dance.” (服にもダンスにも「男専用」「女専用」なんかない。) (Main Story Chapter 5, rough translation by patchy)

Epel provides as a foil character in this case, having stated his dislike for his cute and “girly” appearance multiple times, as well as wanting to be in Savanaclaw due to the athletic nature of the dorm rather than Pomefiore:

“I really... I really wanted to get into the wild and brave Savanaclaw instead!!” (Ceremonial Robes story, chapter 1, translated by twstarchives)

Epel clearly thinks that Pomefiore is too feminine for him, and only puts emphasis on his unwanted cuteness. While Vil being transfemme or a trans woman would certainly be progressive for Japan considering its conservative nature, Vil being a fellow cisgender boy is certainly far more powerful in delivering this response to Epel. They’re both white and cisgender, yet while Epel only sees his adorable baby face as a weakness, Vil sees his own beauty as his strength and capitalises on it. It is precisely why he is so careful to maintain his appearance through dieting and impeccable makeup:

“I've not once neglected my health. And no one on my Magicamera account, which mind you has over five million followers, has said anything about it.” (Vil’s Lab Coat SR, Part 1, translated by kibadreams)

Having grown up in the entertainment industry and showing no sign that he wishes to retire from it, Vil’s “otherwordly” beauty is one of his greatest assets, and as such, he complies with the industry and all its standards, and is unashamed to do something like dancing if it can potentially further his career. Vil is no Azul, but he is still a businessman in the sense that he knows how to advertise, promote and market himself to the masses. To insist that Vil is transfemme or a trans woman erases the meaning to his actions, and instead reduces him to a shallow figurehead based on how traditionally feminine he acts (use of pronouns, way of speaking, behaviour typically seen as “feminine”, etc.) instead of focusing on his relationship with gender presentation and his rejection of traditional gendered labels as a whole.

Arashi Narukami from Ensemble Stars, while not officially confirmed to be trans, provides a good comparison, though many often compare them on a surface level to try and force Arashi’s character onto Vil’s or vice versa. Aside from their shared use of pronouns, professionalism and both having careers in the entertainment industry, the two characters cannot be any more different. Unlike Vil, Arashi has stated her views on her relationship to gender identity multiple times, albeit they are rather inconsistent due to the different writers of Ensemble Stars having varied interpretations of her character. She repeatedly calls herself a “maiden”, a “girl” and a “big sister”, and insists on others using the “-chan” suffix for her rather than “-kun” (the only exception seeming to be fellow unitmate Izumi). She has also stated her internal conflict with her gender, which one can interpret as Arashi wanting to transition but unable to do so due to her career in the modelling and idol industry, as well as the unwelcoming attitude held by Japan in regards to the LGBT+ community:

“I’m honestly envious… No matter how much I want it, and no matter how hard I try… I could never become the beautiful woman I dream to be.” (Gacha story “Beasts — Centre of the World” part 7, translated by euni2319 on Dreamwidth)

Due to the ambiguous nature of the “okama” label, a derogatory one used for both drag queens/crossdressers and trans women alike, it is not clear whether Arashi truly is a trans woman unless canon states otherwise. However, there is certainly enough evidence in the story to argue such a case, especially with the English localisation of Ensemble Stars using she/her pronouns for Arashi. In contrast, Vil’s behaviour is more in-line with an “onee” type character, or a stereotypical feminine gay man, which is surprising considering that the Twisted Wonderland fandom, in all their hope for LGBT+ characters, fails to pick up on. As stated above, “atashi” is a pronoun often used by drag queens/crossdressers and stereotypical femme gay men, the latter of which Vil seems to fall into the category of due to the homoromantic subtext of his relationship/friendship with Rook Hunt. Many of their interactions can be perceived as romantic, even more so due to the stance that both Disney and Japan have on homosexuality, mainly either with unvoiced distaste or being acceptable as a fetish/strange interest due to the forbidden nature of homosexuality in Japan:

“Nevertheless, Rook's eyes are more accurate than any scale. Even more than a mirror, perhaps.” (Vil’s Lab Coat SR, Part 2, translated by kibadreams)

While Vil and Rook’s relationship does have homosexual undertones, on Rook’s part more so than Vil’s, Vil at the very least relies on Rook and trusts him greatly. The above quote is just the tip of the iceberg.

Vil’s character can be seen as a twist on the stereotypical “onee”, one that is written and taken seriously as a direct comparison to how the character type has been commonly used for comic relief or otherwise unimportant side characters in past works (Garfiel from FMA, Magne from MHA, though a trans example of the stereotype, and Otokosuki from DBZ). The implication that Vil is gay by partially conforming to behaviour expected of feminine gay men yet being a serious and hard-working perfectionist (i.e., having a personality not centred around comic relief) is arguably a big step in Japanese anime, games and manga.

Sexism and even ageism in the Twisted Wonderland fandom is unfortunately nothing new, towards all genders. Non-female creators and yumes struggle to garner an audience without yumejoshis, particularly unusually possessive ones, feeling threatened by their very presence. Adult fans are criticised simply for playing the game despite that their in-game payments are what make the game profitable enough for younger fans, most of which do not earn income and thus cannot fund in-game transactions, to continue enjoying Twisted Wonderland. Yana herself has become the scapegoat for Disney Japan, being blamed for any issues regarding the game’s storyline despite that not only are the Disney Japan executives the ones giving the final approval, Yana has been working while ill due to the gruelling and even abusive nature of the anime, game and manga industry in Japan, where artists, animators and other staff members are overworked to produce the smallest bits of content. Fans, especially those often discriminated against in their own countries, have developed an unfortunate habit of using their statuses as minorities to avoid criticism and responsibility for their own actions, going as far as to deflect criticism of their irresponsible behaviour onto the critics and paint them as the aggressors. Anyone who does not view Twisted Wonderland in the same view of unrealistic progressiveness more commonly expected of Western cartoons is shunned and their actions deemed discriminatory. The fandom has evolved into a space where the prey become the predators, the hunted become the hunters, and the oppressed become the oppressors, all in the name of establishing equality and equity.

Ultimately, we are all fans of Twisted Wonderland trying to enjoy the game in our own ways. Our comforts are unique and distinctly different from one another, and no one’s comforts should be prioritised above that of others simply because one is in the minority. While the fact that people have become more and more comfortable taking pride in their own identities is certainly something to be celebrated, we should not be taking this as an opportunity to alienate those we so much as remotely dislike just because they belong to a certain race, gender or age group, particularly twisting oppression against vulnerable minorities to do so. Frankly speaking, none of us have the right to force our own interpretations of canon onto others, minority or not, and doing this simply reinforces one’s narrow mind and self-absorption.

[icarusredwings]

Thinking about Logan getting really worried when Wade's (metaphorical) mask comes off and he's not the guy dancing on the bar, making boob jokes and kicking people in the face but rather the one with his face in the toilet at the club, promising he's okay while still struggling with the side effects that come with cancer.

"No no, really its fine! Go on, go have fun ill be out in a second!"

And being the emotionally closed off manly man that Logan is, doesn't press about it but still waits outside by the door, not letting people in the bathroom, ending up causing a bar fight because hed rather get punched in the jaw then let someone see Wade like that and embaress him.

Thinking about him coming home with groceries and finding him dead asleep on the couch, but the kind of sleep that looks like it was taken by force rather than comfy. The kind where you pass out because your body has had enough and just coming to check on him every couple of minutes before eventually sitting next to him and just waits until he wakes up.

Al can't see. But she's had a smug look on her face ever since Logan has walked in the door because she can hear him walking back and forth to go check on her room mate.

"You're really worried about him, ain't you?"

"What?"

"He's fine, you know. He does that. Go on. Go do what ever it was you angry men do."

But he doesn't go. He stays put. Like a loyal dog at his owners death bed, hoping if he stares enough, he'll get better. Eventually, he falls asleep too And Al is going to tease them both about this for the next month. She took photos to prove it.

Soon enough, it evolves into him picking up tasks so that Wade can rest but refuses to tell him why. He doesn't want to embarrass him and make it feel like a big deal.

"Alright. Well, I'm gonna go walk mary puppins. You want anything from the bodega?"

"No.. actually.. could I walk her? I can take her. Being in this apartment is killing me."

"What need to get your steps in or something?"

"Something like that."

"Ah I get it. Wild cat needs to prowl. Well alright. But dont be taking our baby to any skanks house! Shes too innocent!"