#its bc Im literally her daughters age

[mira--mira]

I do like my job but it can be so frustrating sometimes. I'm jumping through hoops trying to help my boss on a time sensitive issue that has had roadblocks at every turn (not her or my fault) and I'm being as flexible as I can to get it done, changing around my schedule offering to "donate" a handful of supplies if Plan B goes south (Plan A is already up in smoke) bc we literally do not have time to get things in before the project is due. Then I email her that a completely inconsequential email got buried in my inbox because my schedule is wonky and I get in reply a terribly condensing "well, its important to check your emails because thats how we communicate with each other..." Ive been at this position for more than 6 months, I know! I said it was my fault, this is the first time an email alipped by men (despite again, it not being important and everyone else having this issue multiple times I might add), and Ive been consumed by the other project that I've been on call for for thr last week! Why are you treating me like I'm five years old suddenly!!

[fleshdyk3]

god i fucking hate my dad

[fenrins]

im gonna be a hater tonight but idc! its a lomg one but i rlly wanted to rant 😔😔

im just gonna go right in and say it: some house of the dragon characters are unoriginal and lazy, and it pisses me tf off. im sick and tired of seeing the same oc regurgitated in this fandom bc istg half of these hotd ocs are literally just daenerys targaryen thrown back in time under a different name.

i usually dont care abt fanfic because its fanfic. nothing i can do, its probably some child having fun, but like i said im just TIRED of looking through hotd fanfics and seeing daenerys pop up as a faceclaim, and then going on to see that half (or all) of dany’s entire character is put into an oc with little to no actual originality if this makes sense.

before i get into this, what the fuck happened to the originality in original character? like genuinely? this is mainly abt one oc i legit just saw like an hour ago off of tiktok bc but still this applies to the daenerys knockoffs i (regularly) see and cry abt like my grown ass should not care but i do!!!!

starting off, the oc’s name is daenera. cool! fine! she’s not a daughter of rhaenyra which is a slay, but is a daughter of alicent and viserys which eh, good enough. we go on to find out that for some reason vizzy t and ali hate her, and at age 16 they decide to ship her off to pentos so she can marry a dothraki warlord. im not even joking. aside from that, she’s in pentos for a year, and comes back with an army of 550k and three dragons. okay hello daenerys! anyways she apparently fights for rhaenyra, but also bangs aemond, daemon, and cregan in the two year timeframe that the dance takes place in.

no one is gonna read this but my ass is mad and idgaf! i need to complain!! but anyways, i am sick and tired of the ocs that are just cheap copies of daenerys because at what point is this an original character? if youre using a faceclaim of daenerys for your character and essentially adding her entire plotline onto your oc, is it even an oc anymore? like i get being inspired to base a character off of her because dany is literally the blueprint, but copy and pasting her entire character and then going off and ignoring grrm’s established lore (yes, its a fanfic, but ive seen too many oc’s claim both cannibal AND vermithor at the same time and i am TIRED) is just lazy and boring.

i wish people did more with their hotd ocs honestly. like theres hundreds of houses and shit and actual ORIGINAL ideas one could use instead of just taking dany’s whole character and just making it their own. i dont even want to start an argument with this but i NEED to see more original characters. like im writing my own two on wattpad rn (one’s a dragonseed whos like schizophrenic idk and the other’s a mormont who slays the day away) but even then i just need more than aemond x his sister or niece or smth idk yk??

im just reiterating points ive made but man its just ughhhh

[chipchopclipclop]

Please.... Recs for anime about middle aged men..... I beg of you

heres a list from me thinking and also checking my mal lol

Ristorante Paradiso / middle aged and up men working at a restaurant, based on a manga by natsume ono, the anime adaption looks a little wonky at times but the ps2 graphics kind of added to the charm for me lol, the mc specifically chases down a gilf iirc. her power.

Rokuhou-dou Yotsuiro Biyori / middle aged and younger guys working at a restaurant (help) these guys aren't as old as the above but i think most of them will still appeal, a pretty breezy watch

Eternal Boys / middle aged men become idols 🌟 i had a bias against this show bc i like the artist they hired to do the initial concepts and didn't like the changes they made to the final designs but i did eventually watch it and like it so i came around (lol)

Tiger and Bunny / what if superheros but they were real (woah) im reccomending this WELL KNOWN SERIES bc the mc kotetsu is The middle aged anime man of All Time (Of All Time) even if i dont like the main ship the world pushes him into

ACCA13 / i thought about and literally 95% of the men in this are actually middle aged (including the mc) political drama show (and very beautiful) also adaption of natsume ono manga

Deca-dence / of the mc duo, one of them is an old man mentoring a young shounen protag girl (WATCH DECA-DENCE) there is old man yaoi bait potential

Sakugan / its like deca-dance but badly paced and not as good but i have to shill for faildads in anime

My Home Hero / father begins cycle of violence to protect daughter that spirals out of control, you should just read the manga for this one actually but the mc is also one of the Middle Aged Men of All Time to ME

My New Boss Is Goofy / slice of life peaceful show about office workers, everyone in this is very smooth bl ikemen so i kind of bounce of that design wise but its cute

[choccy-milky]

1. your fic is absolutely amazing. Have been bingeing it and I’m literally obsessed. The way you write just itches my brain in such a good way, literally cannot contain my love and appreciation for your work👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 cheers to you!!! Can’t wait to keep reading

2. As I was reading I found out you also deadass drawing the art to go w/ the fic?? Literally you’re living my dream 😭 plus your art is so so so well done!!!!! It’s added so much joy to my reading experience

Cannot wait to see what else you have in store!!’ Hope you have an amazing, AMAZING day, week, year, etc.!!!! 💞🙌🏻🫶🏻

OMG IM GONNA CRY 😭😭 BAHAHA U SENT THIS AT SUCH A CRAZY MOMENT cuz i just checked my ao3 comments and was down about a rude comment i got, and then i come to tumblr and like, a few mins later/literally AS i was venting about it, u send this BAHAHA your choccy senses were tingling. IM SO GLAD U LIKE IT THO AND THAT YOURE ENJOYING IT (and my drawings, even if youve defs seen spoilers by now BAHHA) hope u have a good day too, u defs brightened mine!! THANK UUUU💖💖💖

@kaviary-blog this looks so funny bc i censored u just to keep it (mostly) spoiler free BUT AW THANK U DAMN IM HONOURED THAT MY FANFIC WAS THE ONE TO MAKE YOU CRY?? IM SO HAPPY HOW INVESTED YOU ARE 😭😭💖💖 im also super happy with that chap and its so satisfying like you said to finally be able to tie of all those threads so IM GLAD IT WAS WORTH IT💖

@lovesicklovermia ONE DAY???? OMG. FIRST TWO DAYS NOW ONE?? ITS JUST GETTING SHORTER AND SHORTER. next thing i know someones gonna be like yeah so i took some highly experimental drug that lets me read at 1000% the pace of a normal person, and i finished ur fic in 2 hours 😍omg loved it!!!😍😍 BAHAHAHA but omg i totally see what u mean, they do HAHA. AND THANK U💖💖 IM GLAD UR LIKING IT💖

YEAH so in my fic fifth years are 16, and by the time things get....explicit....clora and seb are 17. im not against consuming media with teenagers depicted in sexual situations like euphoria or riverdale or w.e else bc i get that its fiction and these are just real things that happen so its fine to write about them, but their canonical ages of 15 was still too young for me and i wanted them to be 17 before it got the E rating (which is why clora and sebs birthdays end up being so close, bc i was RUSHING for them to turn 17 BAHAHHAA)

BAHAHA clora and seb secretly being together is like the most poorly kept secret in my fic, like im sure her parents technically KNOW, but due to old fashioned traditions and whatnot (and it being 1891) seb wants to be able to propose properly and with a proper ring, bc clive is intimidating and he doesnt wanna just be like "yeah so im dating your daughter and weve already fucked and i plan to marry her" LOOL he wants to do things properly and be with her with her dads permission(even tho its a bit late for that HAHA) BUT WE CAN JUST PRETEND. tldr its basically just out of some sense of chivalry on sebs side, a fear of her dad, and wanting to do things right LOL

ALSO WAIT OMG STOPPPPP I WAS LITERALLY JUST ABOUT TO POST THIS BUTI HAVE TO INCLUDE THIS NOW

YOU SAW MY POST AND IMMEDIATELY DREW THIS AS A RESPONSE WHILE IN CLASS?? BAHAHAHA IM ACTUALLY SO TOUCHED RN IM TEARING UP WTF THATS SO SWEET OF YOU WTFFFFFFFFF THANK YOU SO MUCH😭😭😭💖💖 (NOW PAY ATTENTION IN CLASS!!🤬🤬)

[kindred-spirit-93]

jazzy!! & apollo

hello yall im back on my bs (biscuit soliloquy) with my wonderful oc jazzy and a modern au i came up with when i opened my eyes this morning lol. u can find a little lore on ma blog under the #jazzy tag :3

--

aight so for context a few months ago while deep in the trenches of my greek mythology obsession i made a minor underworld diety oc who goes by kore or jazzy. shes my favourite muffin and i love her.

and after reading one too many apollo fics here lmao i really wanted to explore his domains (which i find endlessly fascinating bc its all my favourite things in one: medicine art literature) and learn more about him as a god via a character study of sorts.

(ive yet to write anything for them lol but when i do it will be great :P)

--

anyway back to the story they are teachers!! bc im currently rethinking my life choices and having fun imagining what my life could have been like things went differently (11/10 recommend. great for the blorbos). babys first midlife crisis at the ripe old age of 21 lol

so without any further ado, them <3

HHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY BABIES

*slaps hands* aight so context and premise:

cant be bothered to come up with alternative names and clever refernces for everyone so theyre keeping their greek names lol.

not everyone in the pantheon will make an appearance, this aint keeping up with the olympians (until it is)

the setting is vaguely british lol bc its where i grew up and am more familiar with the system and the norms. ish

they teach both primary and secondary school students (this afaik doesnt exist in the uk but it does here so yeah. will elaborate later)

greek mythology adjacent at best i regrettably know very little of the mythos and my one and only reference is theoi. i will do better i promise. as soon as i graduate

in the mean time pls feel free to tell me all about ur fave myths and works and recommend stuff :D!!

--

art stuff, character design, notes

apollo has heterochromia :3 dunno if u can see it but his eyes are olive green (right) and a teal (left). representing the suns reach over land and sea. ALSO FRECKLES >:D

my girl jazzy has the most boring brown eyes ever. no pools of honey or flecks of gold. just good ol dirt brown. *foreshadowing*

short curly hair somewhere between brown and black for her, and floofy kraft singles waves for him XD

jazzy is a knitwear gremlin (like urs truly lol), 24/7 turtlenecks cardigans jumpers scarfs all of it. her hands (and extremeties) are always cold bc bad circulation and probably dehydration. shush

palettes are warm and earthy for jazzy (wow im so subtle) and cool celestial for apollo (and artemis hehe)

so thats mostly greens esp olive, brown and beige and a healthy sprinkle of rose. le aesthetic is forest/ gremlincore for my girl

and lots of blues esp navy and shiny silver and gold for chaotic academia sunshine boi (TIL astroacademia is a thing and like wow)

arts and moodboards and quotes in this century trust

jazzy is of average height (which to me is 160cm hhhhh and apollo is taller at 180cm. do ur own math we use metric in this household)

--

finally concept idea, plot if u will, notes and backgorund info too:

the first thing i thought of when i opened my eyes was literally apollo and his nine daughters the muses. let me finish

i wish i was joking lol it instantly gripped me but alas i had to go to uni and so it stayed on hold and i havent studied more that 3 pages bc im thinking about them

and by thinking i mean going over the same scene in my head and not doing somethinguseful like say expanding lore. as one does.

anyway yes we have apollo the girl dad of all time who has 9 wondeful daughters of varying ages from fist year of uni to toddler

still mapping out details like if from same mother or several relationships. idk what im doing pls respect my privacy at this time

apollo has 2 degrees bc its cool af to me (my dad has two masters and its been on my bucket list since. i dont know why i am the way that i am either) one in nursing and another in english literature (and a masters in translation bc i can)

he teaches english and history tho and the art afterschool clubs. yes clubs plural. i am insane and so is he.

jazzy is a biomed graduate and is currently pursuing a masters in forensic toxicology (sucks that i hade organic chem this would be fun to write) so she teaches bio. probably part time idk.

i will get to the details of lore and what theyre like and their work ethics etc but i is tired and id really like to finish some work before bed lol so goodnight for now and enjoy and feel free to ask stuff ig :3

[darkchocolatedimples]

the tortured poets department (sponsored by my procrastination)

excuse my essays for each song the lyrics are so interesting to me so there’s like actual analyzation for each one.

fortnight - dex

that lingering resentment disguised by surface level friendship is that not literally him and sophie come on. “run into you sometimes, ask about the weather” the awkwardness!! “your wife waters flowers, i want to kill her” he was the #1 fitz hater for multiple reasons after all (although i think he was over it by the time keefe became prominent)

the tortured poets department - sophie

this is so keefe from her perspective come on “you’re in self sabatoge mode, throwing spikes down the road, but i’ve seen this episode and still love the show” “i chose this cyclone with you” “sometimes i wonder if you’re gonna screw this up with me. but you told [biana] that you’d kill yourself if i ever leave. and i had said that to [dex] about you so i felt seen. everyone we know understands why we’re meant to be.” also let’s be so real keefes drawing journals + goodbye letters, he’s giving tortured poet

my boy only breaks his favorite toys - fitz

guys he’s just a silly little boy with anger issues, and he’s MY silly little boy with anger issues stop hating him 😞 “the voices in his head called the rain to end our days of wild” “he saw forever so he smashed it up” he may have fucked up but it happens!!

down bad - dex

CUZ FUCK IT HE WAS IN LOVE!!! also if i may present to you: “i might just die it would make no difference” in the context that outside of sophie saw no purpose to his own life. he saw himself just as he is presented in the books: as her best friend and nothing more. so in losing that (blaming himself and his own feelings for it) what was left of him? who was left? sophie was also his ONLY friend. not to mention in the context of the fact that when he WAS presumed dead nobody cared, they still cared more about sophie.

so long, london - keefe

no not bc of london actually but because “and you say i abandoned the ship but i was going down with it, my white knuckle dying grip holding tight to your quiet resentment” is actually a direct reference to keefitz’ friendship falling apart as fitz got angrier and keefe got more closed off. “you swore that you loved me but where were the clues?” “im just mad as hell cause i loved this place” me when everglen is no longer keefes safehaven. nor anyone’s for that matter bc its haunted by alvars betrayal and alden’s mind break and fitz’ anger.

but daddy i love him - biana

“i just learned these people only raise you to cage you” “i just learned these people try and save you…cause they hate you” “dutiful daughter all my plans were laid…growing up precocious sometimes means not growing up at all.” i hate alden vacker. how do u manage to use and fuck up all ur kids by age 12 like wow. “i’ll tell you something about my good name: it’s mine alone to disgrace” she would 100% say this. she would also 100% say “im having his baby! no im not but you should see your faces.”

fresh out the slammer - keefe

sokeefe or keefitz take it as it comes. “in the shade of how he was feeling.” “as i said in my letters.” “my friends try, but i wouldn’t hear it…for just one glimpse of his smile” “swirled you into all of my poems” it’s so him it is truly.

florida!!! - keefe

THIS one’s about london! “well me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time! yes i’m haunted but im feeling just fine” ethan and eleanor wright who?? “your home’s really only a town you’re just a guest in” candle shade/shores of solace type beat “i need to forget so take me to [london], i have some regrets i’ll bury them in [london]” “i don’t want to exist so take me to [london]” aw bae

guilty as sin? - dex

i don’t know how to explain but i just feel like this feeling of i shouldn’t be doing/feeling this the literal guilt and all these delusions and the sheer intensity of it all is just giving me dex. “this cage was once just fine, am i allowed to cry? i dream of cracking locks, throwing my life to the wolves or the ocean rocks” “i keep these longings locked in lowercase inside a vault” this must be the way he loves if he thinks so little of himself and doesn’t let himself have good things. “i choose you and me religiously” because at the end of the day when he makes a decision or chooses something or someone he puts his all into it.

who’s afraid of little old me - sophie

“you lured me and you hurt me and you taught me. you caged me then you called me crazy. i am what i am cuz you trained me.” all of it’s literally giving her growing into herself in stellarlune and making decisions on her own. SHE IS NOT A PAWN!!!

i can fix him (no really i can) - tam

idk its just giving him defending rayni with his life when everyone else including linh was like who tf is this girl.

loml - fitz

every sad pining song is fitz vacker to me. esp the refrences to the romance being dead but never buried... "still alive killing time at the cemetery, never quite buried...i'm your holy ghost" the way that sophie switched up on him in stellarlune (although i fully support her) didn't give him much time to recover. "are they second-hand embarrased that i can't get out of bed because something counterfiet's dead" give me heartbroken fitz!!! for once instead of angry fitz just give me tired, resigned fitz. "it was legendary, it was momentary, it was unecessary, should've let it stayed buried" is such a good summary of sophitz imo.

i can do it with a broken heart - linh

linh is so interesting to me as a parallel of fitz: meaning she, just like him, is always angry. however she masks it in smiles and kindness the way he never learned to, he just lashes out. this song feels like it’s talking about that mask: “i’m so depressed i act like it’s my birthday everyday” “i can read your mind ‘she’s having the time of her life’ …i can show you lies” “cause im miserable and nobody even knows” “i can hold my breath, i’ve been doing it since [i] left”

the smallest man who ever lived - keefe

it’s giving a letter to cassius/gisela/alvar. “and i don’t even want you back, i just want to know if rusting my sparkling summer was the goal. and i don’t miss what we had” “did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed?” “in 50 years will all this be declassified and you’ll confess why you did it, and i’ll say ‘good riddance’” “i would’ve died for your sins instead i just died inside. and you deserve prison but you won’t get time” “in plain sight you hid, but you are what you did. and i’ll forget you but i’ll never forgive.”

the alchemy - sophie

“cause the sign on your heart said it’s still reserved for me. honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?” aw sokeefe.

clara bow - biana

BIANA BEING COMPARED TO HER BROTHERS AND ALL THE VACKERS BEFORE THEM "the crown is stained but you're the real queen" "beauty is a beast that roars, down on all fours, demanding more...its hell on earth to be heavenly" i love her.

the black dog - fitz

bring back petty fitz!! i think the young girl not knowing the starting line could parallel with keefe not being able to understand things about telepathy that really connected fitz and sophie. i also think we could shift the angle and make it about alvars betrayal and how it sparked his angry trauma response. “you said i needed a brave man, then proceeded to play him until i believed it too.” “now i want to sell my house and set fire to all my clothes…even if i die screaming, and i hope you hear it.”

imgonnagetyouback - fitz

he is 100% this delusional. he's just like me. "you'll find that you were never not mine" "even if its handcuffed im leaving here with you." "told my friends i hate you but i love you just the same, pick your poison babe, i'm poison either way"

the albatross - keefe

“one bad seed kills the garden. one less temptress, one less dagger to sharpen.” “the devil that you know looks now more like an angel. i’m the life you chose, and all this terrible danger.” HE IS THE ALBATROSS. i can’t wait for the movie i want edits of him to this. ACTUALLY I WANT A LOT OF THINGS maybe I’ll make a separate post about that.

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus - keefe

you saw it coming. this song SCREAMS KEEFITZ. like- “you said some things that i can’t unabsorb…you needed me but you needed drugs more.” “changed plans and lovers and outfits and rules all to outrun my desertion of you.” “if you want to break my cold cold heart just say ‘i loved you the way that you were’” WHAT THE HECK DUDE IM SOBBING “back to the moment i crashed into you like so many wrecks do” that line solidified this as keefe’s pov for me. in conclusion. SOBBING.

how did it end - biana

i propose to you: not a relationship, but the vacker family falling apart and the way they became a huge subject of gossip in the lost cities. when alden’s mind broke, while fitz had turned to anger biana became depressed, and i think this song could relate to that as well. the whole part of “guess who we ran into at the shops” feels very much like conversations others would have about the vackers at the time and when alvar betrayed them. “soon they’ll go home to their [brothers], smug cause they know they can trust him.” and i think at the end of the day when all of it happened biana was just young and betrayed and lost, because she didn’t see it coming or understand why (who did?) “the deflation of our dreaming, leaving me bereft and reeling” “i can’t pretend like i understand, how did it end?”

so high school - biana

HER VIBES ALL THE WAY she’s so cute and lovely and i want this for her (and dex. specifically dex. not anyone else.)

i hate here - sophie

was leaning dex until “you see i was a debutant in another life but now i seem to be scared of going outside” but the whole idea of escapism applies to both of them. especially to sophie though when she lived with humans and was so alone because even her own family couldn’t understand her, and she canonically is a bookworm and probably found more comfort in those other lives than she ever could in her own. "I hate it here so I will go to secret gardens in my mind...i read about it in a book when I was a precious child" "ill get lost on purpose, this place made me feel worthless"

thanK you aIMee - tam

aimee 🤝🏽 the song parents. “everyone knows that my [sister] is a saintly woman. but she used to say she wished that you were dead.” “but when i count the scars there’s a moment of truth: that there wouldn’t be this if there hadn’t been you.” thank you song parents 🫶🏽

i look in people’s windows - fitz

i thought this song sounded so creepy till I actually listened to it and now the idea of like lowkey stalking someone just to see if they still care about you or have moved on is slightly making sense. "does it feel alright to not know me? i'm addicted to the if only." it's giving keefitz (when isn't it?)

the prophecy - dex

"let it once be me, who do i have to speak to about if they can redo the prophecy?" THIS JUST REMINDS ME SO MUCH OF THE BEGINNING OF STELLARLUNE WHEN HES LITERALLY MOURNING WHAT HASN'T EVEN HAPPENED TO HIS BROTHER YET i need more dex being the oldest sibling and shouldering that burden. the love-hate relationship with his siblings while simultaneously trying to make their quality of life so much better than what he had. also "a lesser woman would've lost hope, a greater woman wouldn't beg" is so him. he is so that middle.

cassandra - tam

"so they killed cassandra first cuz she feared the worst...do you believe me now?" "you can mark my words, i said it first. in a mourning warning, no one heard." tam when keefe joined the neverseen fr

peter - keefe

pls tell me you saw this one coming. "are you still a mindreader? a natural scene stealer, I've heard great things [fitz], but life was always easier on you than it was on me." "promises, oceans deep, but never to keep" "forgive me [fitz], my lost fearless leader...from when we were just kids. is it something I did?" i think I'm just in a constant state of mourning their friendship.

the bolter - keefe

obvious reasons but also "i can confirm she made a curious child, ever reviled by everyone but her own father." "hearts are hers for the breaking, there's escape in escaping." "she's got the best stories, you can be sure, as she was leaving, it feels like freedom."

robin - dex

had to do some research for this one but apparently its talking about preserving a child's innocence! for this reason it reminds me again of dex and his siblings because of the way he really wants to protect them from things that haven't happened yet (especially considering rex being talentless). "way to go tiger" definitely sounds like something he would say to them feeling all sentimental but then, knowing siblings, they'd probably grill him about why he's being nice 💀

the manuscript -

we know the drill by now, fitz gets all the breakup songs because they could be about sophie OR keefe. "afterwords, she only ate kid's cereal, and slept in her mother's bed" while the song is discussing reverting back to childhood habits in vulnerability, fitz's vulnerability made him angry (but it was still a big change from his regular self) "looking back might be the only way to move forward" I hope he does get to move on!!! im tired of the love triangle plot if we're not gonna focus on keefitz' friendship 😭

[hard-for-harding]

another bunch of clowns trying to bring DA: TV down lmao. 1. dragon age was always "woke" b1tch3s, time to wake up. if you havent noticed this while playing DA:O, you're more stupid than you probably look. 2. crying that the graphics look outdated / ugly / cartoonish etc - on one hand game was in development for a very long time, on the other hand at least it will be optimized for a lot of PCs, and y'all console ppl won't have to worry you're struggling to maintain 60fps... this isnt a COD game or else that it needs photorealistic raindrops and graphics that will be a struggle to run even on high-end PCs and sweating consoles. then you'd be crying that it needs 400gb free space on your SSD and its lagging and barely have 20fps. the game looks pretty as it is, and im sure it will be also well optimized. 3. DA: O combat was better - great, go play that game! GLHF! 4. the game has pronouns - why do everyone pisses their pants when an RPG game lets you choose your pronouns? this is literally 1-click in the game, and no one is forcing you to use something you don't want to? 5. LGBTQ+ in the game - as disclosed before, there were always LGBTQ+ in the game. no one forces you to have mlm or wlw playthroughs in the game! and just bc you dont want this, let other ppl enjoy the game as they want.

6. "Where are the white men?" - up your @$$. srsly, there will be plenty of white men in the game... y'all need a video game that has only male player characters, male npcs, so even if you go to get a quest from the queen the queen will be a white man, and you can earn to marry her daughter whos also a white man.

7. Morrigan - honestly she looks better than ever imho, no one cares that incels dont find her hot enough. go play any korean made game like the first descendant and you'll see plenty of @$$ and T1ts. Closing: you need to accept that there are billions of games out there, and hundreds of millions of ppl are playing them - not all games are going to be up your alley for whatever reason, and you need to accept that. i dont give a damn about WoT, WoW, COD, etc other games you play and im not talking shit about it either on the forums. if youre doing that, you need to crawl out of mama's basement, take a needed shower to wash off your sweaty opinions, and get a life, touch some grass.

[merlucide]

gonna have a convo with my dad tmr (rant about dad tingz)

I’m gonna do it 🗣️ and he’s gonna have to listen

I invited him to take me to lunch (LMAO)

I’m gonna tell him how I feel and hope for the best, he’s going to get defensive and deflect it but I’m ready fr 💪 He’s prob gonna gaslight a tad too lol

He’s not a bad dad, just not the best yk? He’s not mentally/physically abusive thank God but he’s like…. special.

He makes me so upset— I mean he’s really hurt me and there has been moments were he has physically hurt me. That was a while again but those were impactful moments for me, and bitch I don’t remember an apology?! then I get after bro for doing what he did to me to my sister and like I was angry crying and getting off at him bc you don’t fucking hurt people and not apologize?!? THATS NOT FUCKING DISCIPLINE?! ITS ABUSIVE. And bc you are so fucking prideful and don’t want to face the fact that you hurt me, you hurt her, you are going to deny and say ‘well that’s what happens in life’. Shes 7. SEVEN. Who is on the spectrum and has ADHD. She doesn’t fucking understand you asshole. NO SEVEN YEAR OLD IS GOING TO TAKE AWAY ‘I shouldn’t have done that’ WHEN YOU FUCKING DO THAT. She’s going to remember how YOU hurt her, and how YOU didn’t apologize, how YOUR wife held her and deescalated the situation. You cannot blame a child for acting like that, yeah she was acting absolutely insane and frustrating, but you as a fucking grown adult cannot hurt your child like that. AND THEN COMPARE YOU TO ME?!? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?.

And he doesn’t even care about her, it’s sad. I mean this whole situation is fucked up man, I get it. My siblings quite literally ruined my life tbh.

How do you think I felt when my dad stopped caring about me? Stopped playing with me— and started yelling. How do you think I felt when you turned grey and I was the only one helping momma with the kids. I was little too. I didn’t know it would get so crazy after we adopted them?! No one did?!? So stop blaming this shit in my mom you signed those fucking papers too. She’s still your daughter you asshole. Care about her too. You don’t get to make efforts with me once a month then discard her. AND fucking act like you don’t have a son anymore, just because he is out of the house doesn’t mean you have no connection to him. If he was a normal fucking kid he’d wonder why his dad is the only one that doesn’t call. But since he’s also fucked in the head he doesn’t, it’s better that way. I hate and love my siblings. Well, I love my sister, I’d kill for her. I love my brother too, but I hate him, yes it sounds ridiculous considering the overwhelming age difference between us but he hurt me significantly. I’m glad he’s gone, he’s doing better anyways. I wish things were different. I wish he could’ve been normal. Lmao I remember thinking ‘I just wish he was never born’ lol. It’s not his fault their parents sucked.

Anywho wow getting sidetracked here—

My dad is a crazy Winston Churchill ‘follower’ of you would. Constantly quoting him and wtv sooooo I have a couple quotes ready to fire at him when he gets defensive… heheh

I feel so prepared lmao

I’ve also talked about him so much with my mom so I’m like extra ready lol

I just need to get it out yk.

Also if anyone is reading this (which I doubt) my dad is NOT abusive or wtv— i am not in danger or wtv 😭🙏 im not in denial I’m quite aware of how my life looks so know it’s ok. And again, my dad isn’t a bad dad, there’s just a lot of pain in our relationship 🫠 He tries, just it’s never what I need yk. He loves me and our family, he just has issues of his own (Not excusing in the slightest- in fact I think it’s a shitty excuse but yk) I love my dad, he’s just rlly hurt me yk

[acuar-io]

haii interview incoming about your ocs

If they were an animal what animals would they be?

Do they have any siblings? hows their relationship with family?

Where are they fromm? do they speak another language?

What's their biggest (stupidest) fear?

Favorite music genre/artist?

and last because im yapping away...are there any fun facts or deets about them youd like to share?

YAY OC ASK TIME!! I actually answered this on the app and tumblr poofed it. So im going to reanswer the questions again lol. Its going to be a long one so BUCKLE UP CUS HERE WE GO!

If they were an animal what animals would they be?

Sephtis would be a black cat 🐈‍⬛, Izara a bunny 🐇, Benny an otter 🦦 and I have really introduced him to the blog yet and gotten into his character, but Dante would be a dog 🐶 specifically a Jack Russell

2. Do they have any siblings? hows their relationship with family?

I love this question and I will get more into detail with all of my ocs in another post or in their character page (when i create one :3)

Sephtis has an older sister (three years older). They both have a good relationship with their mother, but a terrible one with their father. Their dad actually cut ties with them because they are both (according to him) "a disgrace to the company and family name" he ended up giving the company to their cousin because neither of them wanted to inherit their fathers company, nor cared about his business lol. Their father was never really there for them, their mother practically had a facade the entire marriage & fought so much for Seph and his sister to live "normal lives" as nepo babies (lol) they were pretty popular in school because of their bg which they hated. Their parents divorced Sephs senior year of hs and at that time is when his dad cut ties w him as well.

Izara is an only child. She has a good relationship with her parents. They're more on the traditional side & older people, so sometimes they dont see eye to eye, especially when she was in Junior High & High school. Izara's interests concerned them (literally just regular interests teenagers have that freak out ethnic parents bc they need theyre becoming demons or some shit lol) also didnt like that she loved art and wanted to be an artists/art curator. Eventually though, they understood that they cant control what their daughter does with her future and that is all up to her ( I think they left her alone more so because they realized she is successful in her art and modeling career).

Benny is the youngest of 4. He has 3 sisters. His relationship with his parents was really shitty growing up, sadly. He is gay & hes known that for his whole life. Having 3 sisters and being the only boy, he loved to play with dolls. His parents being very religious, seeing him play with dolls, was not something they liked. Even if he was just playing with his sisters. In school, he was bullied. There was name calling and rumors that spread around about him. His parents hated the rumors and name calling not because it hurt Benny, but because it makes them look like bad Catholics. Benny truly only had his sisters and other female friends by his side throughout school. It wasnt until high school where things seemed to change for the better. This especially were better because he had Sephtis. His parents have come around, but they def took their time to finally accept their son.

3.Where are they from? do they speak another language?

Sephtis is from Osaka, Japan (Mt. Komorebi) then moved to Los Angeles at age 4 (Del Sol Valley). He speaks English and Japanese!

Izara is from New York (San Myshuno), shes Ethiopian-American. She speaks English and Amharic.

Benny is from Quebec (have no idea what sim world would be considered Canada lol) He speaks French & English

What's their biggest (stupidest) fear?

Okay so Sephtis & Izara are afraid of movie characters LMAO Sephtis will forever be afraid of Kayako (The Grudge) movie he watched as a kid with his sister that scarred him as a child ksfkksfks. Izara specifically does not like the older Godzilla (model?? costume??) she thinks its ugly and creepy as fuck like literally nightmare looking ass creature. IS THIS NOT JUST CREEEPY TO U???

Ok I wouldnt say Benny's is stupid....hes afraid of bugs specifically roaches. I mean logically, hes bigger than them so he can step on them and kill them, but he just finds them super fucking gross that he cant bring himself to do that lol.

Favorite music genre/artist?

Sephtis' fave band is BUCK-TICK, Fave genre is Rock (I'll keep it broad because he loves a toe=ne of sub rock genres).

Izara's fave artist is PinkPantheress! For groups, she likes New Jeans, Aespa & Perfume (yes she listens to kpop/jpop). Fave genre is pop for sure!!

Benny's fave band are the cranberries!! fave genre is also rock, but he prefers alternative rock!!

and last because im yapping away...are there any fun facts or deets about them youd like to share?

Okay well, I want to share a little about Seph and Benny's relationship rq!! So they went to the same high school. Sephtis is a year older than Benny. Their paths didnt officially cross until Sephtis' senior year and Benny's junior year of high school. They met one day after school when it was raining, Benny didnt have an umbrella but sephtis did :) thats all ill say for now :3

[gold-rhine]

i thought Neuvillette and Navia would be a more popular ship bc their scene at Callas' graves gave huge Jane Austen/period drama vibes but now i feel he's more paternal toward her than anything. i can't see him with Furina either if i'm being honest.. but i always look forward to your insights bc you always have such smart and interesting observations <3

thank you! :3 their confrontation with navia was very dramatic and emotionally charged, yeah, but like you gotta remember context in the narrative. like, their scenes were about critiquing failures of the justice system, with neuvi being a representative of it as the high judge. like navia is literally the victim of failures of fountaine court that followed the letter of the law and let her father die, yelling at the authority who allowed that to happen. if this authority figure then somehow had expressed any interest\attraction to said victim, that would be like beyond fucked up. like navia's role in the plot is to be representation of common ppl suffering from the negligence of the rulers, neuvi as a ruler can only stand there and nod sadly as she yells at him, there cannot be any chemistry, come on adfgjk

and this ties to the "paternal" vibes like come on, not everything has to be family coded. neuvi is a sovereign\god of life, a lot of his interactions is immediately taking responsibility\care of weaker people\people in need. if we start calling this "paternal" every time its gonna get ridiculous. and also like he is canonically a single dad of 400+ daughters, we do have example of how him being paternal looks like. so like, does he look like that when interacting with a character? no? then mb lets not assign him a dad for said character. seriously, i think there is a very distinct difference in how he lights up and interacts with melusines, who are actually vishaps and part of his bloodline, compared to him being benevolent ruler interactions

with furina specifically i don't like the paternal angle bc like it infantilizes her a bit, like they are the same age first of all. but also it erases interesting dynamic of archon and dragon i was talking about before, because yeah, she IS the one actually in charge, even if he's more powerful and ppl can tell. She pulls the rank on him ALL THE TIME, and she's in precarious situation where the rank is all she has, she cannot force him to do smth and it throws her off when he confronts her about it, like when she assumed he would go cover her in meeting with arlecchino without even asking him, he was like "thats not my job tho:\" and she lost her shit panicking, and pulled rank on IM THE GOD TRUST ME even harder. like there is a lot of interesting power play between them, even not touching colonialism specifically, where she is the puppet-ruler in power just bc his usurper took that power, and trying to force it into family box erases it

[magebutts]

my sincere apologies to everyone who's sick of seeing me talk about all my griefs with veilguard, but i do have more lol

did anyone else feel an extreme lack of connection between rook and the rest of the party? is that just me? like it feels like they spent a lot of time focusing on the interpersonal relationships between the companions and their individual stories, and then rook is just... there. and like i get it, the charcters are important and always have been. but it feels like rook really gets sidelined. (forewarning i also got sidetracked and talk abt a lot of loose story ends and stuff)

and maybe i just missed out on it because i played a shadow dragon who didnt save minrathous, but even their background doesnt feel super important. like i get rook is a hero by happenstance but like.... idk.

yeah idk for an rpg, especially a bioware rpg, i expect more. like da2 might have been super restricted bc there was no origin choice, but at least you were connected to the story. the warden was integral to the story. the inquisitor had the mark and was integral to the story.

and rook was just like... a silly goofy lil guy who cracks jokes no matter which dialogue option you choose and as much as i enjoy the heroes who are like "someone has to do the job so i guess it might as well be me if no one else is gonna do it", it felt incredibly mishandled.

and again, idk, maybe i missed out on a lot bc i did play a shadow dragon who saved treviso and romanced the slowburn guy who had virtually no romancr content which is a whole problem on its own, but... whatever lmao 🙃

oh and as i just saw a post about it on twitter, its WILD that they brought back morrigan AND ALSO ISABELA ???? and you get NO say in their history, when it is very easy to have both of them permanently leave ur party in their respective games. like im sorry, isabela learned the meaning of found family in kirkwall? every game i have ever played, i have never succeeded in getting her to stay even when i was trying to. they couldnt even be bothered to say hawkes name once in veilguard but isabela is gonna wistfully namelessly reference them??? and the fact that a character who could have been trapped in the fade and is never mentioned once in a game that is all about people being trapped in the fade

and do NOT get me started on morrigan and flemeth. we are NOT going to pretend flemeth wasnt a horrible woman who had daughters for the sole sake of creating a posessable vessel. or the fact that in a lot of worldstates, morrigan has a son who we were previously told contained the soul of an old god of tevinter... only to find out that that isnt true, so that boy was also possessed by a fragment of the spirit of an elven god, which flemeth and then solas potentially also stole if kieran existed.

and also never acknowledge the fact that there are still in fact 5 blighted elven gods trapped in the fade, granted they would hypothetically be mortal with their dragons dead but like... theyre still out there.

and dont get me started on the state of the south, i will literally never be able to care about anything else knowing what happened there. and like, idk what bioware expected. we spent three whole games in ferelden + the free marches. and i will argue, that as interesting as the rest of the world is, ferelden + the free marches are the home of dragon age. and that very well might just be me, but i feel like having games set anywhere else created a rift very similar to the rift between andromeda and the main mass effect series

ESPECIALLY with the "secret ending" cutscene (spoilers for that now if you havent seen it)

hinting at the series going even bigger + beyond the fade, its giving pathfinder/dnd outer realms, and im sorry, but if dragon age leaves the medieval fantasy theme to go for eldritch/alien beings, im gone. my interest in the series is dead. implying that everything that has happened has been the design of some greater beings and all of your heroes and their actions were actually someone else's doing all along... its an insult to player agency, and you can NOT continue doing that as much as EA has done in an rpg series. the dissolution of the keep and previous player choices and characters appearing in zero capacity was already a lot, but i could accept it if the scope of the story was beyond our choices. but with solas's dagger being the one hawke found in the deep roads, with darkspawn ravaging ferelden again and there being no mention of alistair or the grey warden who could very much still be alive and in the order, let alone be ruling the fucking kingdom, its fucking insane actually. its insane that the only choice that apparently has any meaning was how you inquisitor felt about solas, and beyond that, if you romanced him. even disbanding the inquisition doesnt seem important anymore, bc there is zero mention of solas and his agents that he had in trespasser.

like yes, sorry, i am mad actualy that no one else and nothing else mattered. the inquisitor and dorian stood side by side and you dont even get to determine their relationship if they arent together. like the man who invented telephones and face time for his best friend can only say "bet u cant wait to go home and see a certain somebody, WINK", not even considering the fact they might not have been friends.

how funny and easy it would have been for varric (ignoring the fact that hes a ghost) to make one singular joke about hawke dating an abomination and rook doing the same. for isabela to mention fenris or merrill, or a romanced hawke. for merrill to never be mentioned again despite being so dedicated to researching and restoring her eluvian. for fenris to never be mentioned despite his ties to seheron and tevinter. for the warden to never be mentioned despite ending one blight just to have two more ravage their country in their lifetime. for the crows to be a main faction and zevran gets two vague unnamed mentions in companion ambiant dialogue. for starkhaven and fucking sebastian vael, a character many people didnt see bc he was a dlc add-on, let alone a highly disliked character who a lot of people with his dlc never even recruited. no mention of hawke or their warden sibling, who were said to have disappeared after venturing to weisshaupt when all the wardens were recalled and the keep went silent. and i am going to harp on this, the cure for the fucking blight. because it is possible, and now with veilguard, we have seen it TWICE in canon.

it really just drives home that actually, the scope hadnt gone past the former heroes, they just cared more about telling their own story than collaborating with the players who make the games possible.

anyways bioware im in your fucking walls, ea i know where you fucking live and i do actually expect better from a triple a studio who was fucking stupid enough to acquire a studio who was revolutionary and famous for their storytelling only to not fucking support that

[1eos]

Hi, just read your post about immigrant mothers ruining their kid's jobs. My mother is not an immigrant but she's asian and she cannot for the life of her be considerate with my previous job situation.

I earned 2k monthIy. It's quite low bc we're poor and I have to use half of my pay to support my family. So I decided to take this remote part time job for savings (not just for me but for the family also) and bc of that I am almost in front of my laptop 24/7. It's a report writing job and usually I would have 2 reports weekly to be submitted within 4 days.

My mother hated that I am always in my room doing work and would get so angry because "I listen to the employers more than her". She would make me do a lot of house chores when she knew I was tired from work just to spite me, saying that in the house I do the least chores???? Yeah bc I have a deadline to catch OMG.

Usually I would plan my week for the reports but then she would make me drive her for errands etc and would guilt trip me if I don't do so. Because of this I would stay up all night trying to finish the report just so that she won't throw a fit. Also, I have 2 other brothers who have a lot of free time but just for gaming, not for chores.....but somehow I'm the bad guy......which also makes me believe all asian mothers are "boy moms" but that's for another day.

The problem about these mothers is not because they don't understand their children. It's because they DO NOT WANT to. Because if they do, it means they have to listen/cater to you; not the other way around. They rather die than doing THAT.

first n foremost i haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate that you're going thru this :(. it's truly thee worst to be sabotaged by a mother its truly so insidious and too many ppl in this day and age think its cute or like something we just have to suffer thru bc hey that lady gave birth to us and helped raise us. like the idea that GIRLS --bc they rarely if ever do this to sons--are literally put on earth to toil and suffer and serve their mothers, brothers, aunties etc until some man comes along and then u serve him w no thought or care for ourselves until we die is sooooooooo pervasive.

like its so sad that in 2024 you have someone purposefully going out of her way to sabotage your hustle :(((((((((((((((((( and i won't do the annoying 'just move out!' bc trust me ik how hard it is to move out right now!!!!!!!!! i will say i hope you maintain the strength and energy to persevere thru the sabotage 😐 you will win. misogyny will not win! m*thers who are mad that their daughters aren't just rolling over to be the family doormat. and its like? you'd think they'd be happy but that post partum jealousy is something else i'll tell you that

i still remember being a kid and my mom waiting until i was totally asleep to force me awake to put two dishes in the dish washer?????? and would be yelling and totally pissed off that im not standing at attention to do the dishes at 11pm 😭😭😭😭😭 bitch i was in literal rem sleep why are u screaming at an unconscious child? just lacking control or excitement in their own lives and take it out on their daughters its fucking sick

bc you're right lolllll its not that they 'dont understand' they deadass do not want to. which is why i don't believe in extending grace for bad mothers in a lot of these situations bc why the hell do i have to put myself in YOUR shoes and suffer disrespect always thinking about YOUR feelings when for the first 18 years you were the ONLY adult??? absolutely bizarre. i hope one day we can stop lighting up mothers for shit they can't control like crying babies or having to breastfeed and clock them for the way theyre cornerstones in keeping the patriarchy alive. and the specific bullshit mothers dole out and get away with it bc society expects total devotion to mothers especially from daughters like i need everyone to wake it up bc there's nooooo reason for a grown ass person to be sabotaging you like that! a lot of us are living in the house with our worst opponents and i hate it!

but bottom line? I AM ROOTING FOR YOU ANONNNN WE WILL MAKE IT OUT OF HERE I PROMMY

[goodfully]

oh god i cant believe ive finished reading the neapolitan novels already, its over??? ahh okay thoughts on the last book "the story of the lost child"..

honestly i was dreading the last maybe twenty pages bc i didnt want it to end hahaha. its crazy that everything we've read is essentially all for lila. "i who have written for months and months and months to give her a form whose boundaries wont dissolve." ahh!!!!! what!!!!!! to spend so much of the book saying how much lila suffered and feared from dissolving boundaries, how she had been so overwhelmed during the earthquake when the entire world felt like its boundaries were dissolving, and then say that everything shes written is to keep her from dissolving herself... my goodness. "i loved lila. i wanted her to last. but i wanted it to be i who made her last. i thought it was my task. i was convinced that she herself, as a girl, had assigned it to me." wow... you ever loved someone so much... also.. the way lenu was saying how connected they are, that even tho she has written a lot about her own life in these pages, "the very nature of our relationship dictates that i can reach her only by passing through myself"??? god.

i think my favorite parts of the book were all when lenu and lila were so close to each other during and after their pregnancies. i just thought it was so sweet, the way they were basically a family together, two mothers and their children. going to their doctors appointment tmr, taking walks together, taking care of each others daughters like their own.

i have to admit that i was confused by the meaning of the dolls at the very end, but i love that the openendness of the ending was referring back to something unanswered (where were the dolls) from one of the very first scenes from the first book (altho very interesting!, considering how not too long before the end of the book, lenu was telling imma not to believe in the cyclical nature of society). to me i thought, perhaps also it could mean that (assuming its lila) lila chooses existing (with lenu) over disappearing? actually, when tina disappeared and dede had accused lila of losing tina on purpose, i immediately thought it made sense. the first thing we literally know about lila is how she has felt the need to erase herself completely, and tina parallels/is an extension of lila the way imma parallels/is an extension of lenu. lila wanted to erase herself without a trace, and there was literally zero proof of tinas death/kidnapping/existence.

in the same way lila wouldnt be able to erase herself completely without also erasing tina, i think about the idea of how the ppl we love will never truly be erased if we love them? thats why even if tina disappeared, lila cant be erased bc lenu loves her. like how, whether its on purpose or not to keep her mother alive, lenu finds her mothers existence with her in her limp. i think the same could be said about the solaras, who altho arent exactly loved by the neighborhood, are important enough to most ppl in the neighborhood and their power is still felt in the neighborhood after their death. also, i think its a little different, but im reminded of when lenu said something like the many fragments of ourselves are scattered like splinters or something (altho i think the context here was about their children). but no one is ever never really gone, i think.. oh.. i go crazy every time she talks about her relationship/similarities with her mother (the ancestors in her body when she was physically violent back against her mother, and the.. "must i watch you become worse than me?"), and her relationship/similarities with her daughters (her daughters reaching the same age as the ghosts of her girlhood), and every time the imma/tina relationship parallels the lenu/lila relationship.

i was thinking that this book was more of accepting yourself and your origins, whereas the other books showed lenu and lila trying to escape them? perhaps acceptance of the past and the agency you have despite the past that defined you? like when lenu realizes that ninos actions are not attributed to his father, nino is his own person and he himself is the reason he is a piece of shit man, not just bc of the man who raised him. and that part when lenu said that antonios tone resembles the neighborhood, but it is entirely his own. more so when lenu had published her third book and said that only words and stories from the neighborhood were the only ones with meaning, and that she no longer felt she was a victim of her origins but was capable of dominating them and using them to climb higher. stuff about the past and present colliding. it reminds me of when mariarosa said something like, a woman without love for her origins is lost, or something.. i kinda forgot what the context was tho.

oh another thing, the closeness between the childhood neighborhood friends meant so much to me.. like there was a moment when carmen said that lenu and lila are her sisters during that little gathering with the neighborhood group of kids now all grown up just talking to each other... i think theyre like family, they grew up together. when lenu goes in the neighborhood after moving back to naples and is talking to carmen, lila, and enzo again... they care so much about each other. and talking about how much they love pasquale too no matter what hes doing. sobs.

this just reminded me of nino.. (he was there the first time, but whatever! he kinda wasnt.) when lenu makes nino come over, i was so pissed... and i had a feeling something bad would happen while he was there, but tinas disappearance was not what i was expecting.. oh but enzo.. my beloved, he was so caring and attentive, not only to tina but also imma. ahh.. while im on the topic of men, the part when gennaro and stefano find rino, and gennaro had to listen to stefano yell insults at rinos dead body and then beats up stefano while crying that he is disgusted with himself for being his son. it just made me really sad.. these are the two adult men he has and is related to..

tbh francos death sticks out to me mainly bc he said something that i honestly believe and live by, i repeat it to myself to not relapse into whatever mental illness, "it [is] a good rule not to expect the ideal but to enjoy what is possible", but then he kills himself immediately after and it... makes me so fucking sad.

lenu said this only in the beginning about feeling the hostility from her mother/lila and felt estranged from them, but i often think about freedom vs loneliness. i suppose its also something throughout the whole series, with how much she wanted freedom and to escape from her origins, she /was/ lonely. and the time spent trying to be on her own without lila was also lonely. the end of the entire series when she felt her friendship with lila must have ended... that was lonely. i think in this fourth book, lenu expressed a lot more of her love for lila.

anyway... overall i loved the entire series so much... i am so glad i read it finally, its some of the best books ive ever read. im on a trip with family rn and every time someone asks me what im reading, i really dont know how to summarize all four novels all together in a way that explains how good and thoughtful it all is. also i know its adapted into a show, which i really want to watch eventually! i still cant believe im done reading tho.. like what do i do now! ahhhhhh

[bonesandthebees]

YESSS OH MY GOD PLEASE SCREAM AT ME I've read the entire thing but I don't remember where in the book each thing happens so I can't say shit yet out of fear of spoilers but I am SO READY to ramble with you once you're done AAAAA

-❄️

IM LOSING MY MINDDDD like I've hit the stage I hit when I was reading priory where I become so obsessed with the book I just want to read it all the time and it's all I can think about it's so so good

I'll talk a little bit about what's making me so insane the most below the cut - spoilers for a day of fallen night (prequel to the priory of the orange tree) below!

just. glorian and wulf. aaaaaa I love their relationship so much. I had a strange feeling wayyyy earlier in the book that something was going to happen and wulf might end up being the one to get glorian pregnant but just. they mean so much to me. their friendship is so sweet.

I'm just going so insane over glorian in general. she's a child!!! she's a 16-17 year old girl who is so scared but is so determined to be the best queen she can. her mother thought she wasn't enough and even though her mother isn't here to see her fulfill her duties she's so determined to be more than what her mother thought she would be. I seriously adore how samantha shannon wrote her. she genuinely feels so much like a teenage girl even as she gets more and more responsibilities settled on her shoulders.

and just. the way she's chained to her castle walls until she has a child. her body is an incubator and she can't defend her people the way she wants until her womb has served its purpose. she wants so badly to be more than a womb, she wants to be the shield for her people. she wants to be their protector. she wants to be their queen. but she can't do that until she continues this vicious cycle of the berethnet queens.

(also I just deeply appreciate how clear samantha shannon made it that glorian is aroace. I know she wrote tané as aroace in the first book which was great but it wasn't the kind of thing I could extrapolate from the text on my own. glorian's orientation never feels unnaturally slotted in it's just a part of who she is but it's very explicit at the same time. and I especially appreciate it since she does have sex! and she doesn't hate it, even joking with wulf like "oh how terrible we have to do this several times" but also knowing once she's pregnant she's never going to have sex again. like yes asexuals can have sex and even enjoy it and I just love the nuance glorian is given)

but man. glorian shieldheart. she's so young but she's doing such an amazing job as queen already and I'm so glad she had wulf and that he made sure she was comfortable and okay. I am terrified something is going to happen to wulf but if he survives the grief of ages I am so deeply hoping he gets assigned to stay in Inys serving glorian as a knight so he can watch his daughter grow up even if its from afar

also of course I love all the other characters too. I love dumai and nikeya's dynamic so much and I'm so obsessed with the two of them (I had first suspected maybe they were going to have something between them but I brushed it off and when I realized we were going that direction I literally cheered out loud). and tunuva... oh tunuva I love you. I want her to find wulf so badly. I'm also a bit pissed at esbar saying that tunuva doesn't feel the priory are enough, she's trying to find her SON!! I get you might not love your daughter more than any other priory sister esbar but tunuva loves both her children so deeply. I am very scared of what canthe/kalyba is up to. also when tunuva first told the story of how she lost her son to canthe I thought to myself "man wouldn't it be wild if that was wulf" and then I brushed it off bc I was like how would he get to inys. still don't know how he got there but I'm sure canthe had something to do with it.

just. aaaaaa. I'm losing my mind snowflake help

[areamodell]

dropping my lore bc i’m bored and want a recap

i will like always wonder why me and my parents never had a healthy relationship w eachother. idk if it was bc my parents js decided to split up when i was only 4 or what but i kinda never had a good relationship w either of them…🤔

when i was younger (like i said, 4), my parents split up and i wanted to be w my mom more bc i love my mom and when i was around 7 she got a bf and had my brother, wtv. but a year or 2 after having my brother they started having issues and argued literally almost every chance they got and it was bc of smth dumb i swear. and then my mom js disappeared to oklahoma from 2017-2021 and i quite literally didn’t know what was happening. at the time i was living with my dad so yeahhh

and i didn’t like living with my dad bc i was always scared of him and i was always intimidated by what would happen if i got a bad grade and to this day im lowk still scared to ask for help w anything. whether its grades or anything bc when i was in 1st grade my dad wanted me to be an overachiever. so everyday after school i obvi had hw and i sat in the living room w him and he’d help me. i think u can assume what would happen everytime he got mad but if its not obvious, he’d yell, sometimes smack me, and lowk be messing up my hw paper. so like id obviously be scared of him

when my mom came back from oklahoma or wtv i went back w her but the apartment i was living w my step dad, brother, and mom, was literally empty, like they ditched it when my mom came back. and my mom literally went crazy for awhile. and to sum up her crazy was basically going to court often, filing kidnapping papers(cs my step dad took my brother too when they ditched the apartment), and not being able to provide a good childhood since she had no money. so i was an basically an akward 10 year old at the time both scared of my parents. when i was 10 or 11 i was in the car w my mom and she was kinda js talking on the phone and i don’t remember what it was abt but i told her like “i got sa’d by grandpa” and when i told her she was obviously surprised and im time skipping a little but she asked her dad which is the grandpa and overall, nothing was charged bc i had no proof and bc it happend a long time ago when i was 4.

my dad was an overall good guy w a bad temper so yeah when he’d get mad he would be really really mad. but i’m glad he’s a changed guy and i could talk to him sometimes.

my mom is doing okay now too. in 2022 she got a truck driving job so good for her. but i hate that i can’t even have the mother daughter relationship like other girls my age. like yeah i wanna tell her all the drama at school, yes i wannna trust her with my relationship status and who i like, but i can’t without her telling my dad. so BOOM trust a little broken. but it’s so uncomfortable at her house when i go over on weekends because i just feel like a roommate bc she makes me pay for my own stuff. like when we go out i pay for my own food and clothes and wtv, and restaurants too. so i kinda js get sad when i think abt it bc i kinda js wanna be treated like her kid instead of a grown up. and it honestly doesnt make it better that my brother gets her undivided attention and all i get was a good job. not trying to sound ungrateful but yeah. at first when i was able to see her, she tried to bribe me with gifts as if to be won over by it but i js wish i had a childhood.

me and my dads relationship is okay. we arnt close but we talk, but he doesn’t get me like that. like i wish my mom could js listen and give me advice as if we been bsf for years.