#its a whole lot more complicated than either of them think

[dustlakeca]

thinking about angie again. could june and her ever become friends? were they friends before?

[mangled-by-disuse]

Tried to put this in the replies, but it got long and is relevant to the OP, so:

Less so than the average British/South African white guy of his time, which is to say: yes, but not notably so.

He did also speak very bluntly in his response to the Nazi requests to translate his work, claiming he would have been proud to be a genuine Aryan [that is, from the Indian subcontinent] but unfortunately he's just German and English. Some of that is "Oxford fellow thinks he's being very smart" rhetorical devices, but he also does seem to have been pretty vocally of the belief that different cultures and ethnicities held value, and while he left South Africa very young and considered himself English, he did also remark on the brutality and inhumanity of the apartheid regime there. He also criticised C.S. Lewis' assertion (in The Last Battle) that some people couldn't get into heaven on the basis of race and culture, but "have a theological argument with C.S. Lewis" does seem to have been one of his primary hobbies at the time so idk if that was purely anti-racist.

At the same time: this was at a time when the N-word was in common parlance (including in children's nursery rhymes and even in leftist discourse), when Britain had an empire and Tolkien had been raised in one of its colonies, and when the school system emphasised "the white man's burden" and the savagery and primitivism of "lesser" cultures. And Tolkien was not a radical, and not sufficiently concerned with race as a topic to break fully from that social conditioning. So it's not like he wasn't a racist, but he wasn't a racist by the standards of his time, background, and immediate environment. (Bearing in mind that his immediate environment was the same one that saw the rise of Oswald Mosley and Winston Churchill.)

What Tolkien WAS was a genuine, old-school British conservative, which I think is what right-wingers pick up on in his work. He had an engrained belief in hierarchy and traditionalism, and his arguments against capitalism come from Catholic semi-feudalism, not socialism. "The rich man in his castle, the poor man at his gate/God made them high and lowly and each to his estate" is very much an underpinning of a lot of Tolkien's work, which emphasises the importance of working to, and being satisfied with, your status in life - Sam's strength is his humility and desire to be a simple gardener, but, while humility remains valuable throughout, Aragorn's strength is that he knows that he is born to be King. Ruling is all he can ever ethically do (noticeably, whether or not his people consent to be ruled - note that the first Man of Gondor he comes into contact with is Boromir, whose response of "ok mate where the fuck have you been when we were fighting and dying for the past forty years?", and that is cast as a mistake on Boromir's part, and he is told to sit down and respect the rightful king by Literal Voice Of The Gods Gandalf), and it would be wrong and evil for him to try to do anything else, just as it would be a moral wrong for Sam to try to be a king.

Lord of the Rings in particular is very concerned with noblesse oblige and the burdens of power - while, yes, the core story is "minor gentry [Sam is the only actual working-class character] rises above his presumed station and, through being literally and metaphorically one of the little people of the world, slips under the radar and completes a heroic quest", almost all the surrounding stories are about the difficult duty of managing power. And, unfortunately, this lends itself very readily to a "white man's burden" kind of reading - these people, you see, are simply of superior race (literally, in the case of the Elves, and in the case of Aragorn, Boromir, and the ruling class of Gondor being measured by their proximity to Númenorean bloodlines), and so it is their unfortunate duty to command and to cleanse the lesser (Orcish, and by extension Easterling and Haradrim) races from their nice, functional societies.

To be clear: I do not think this is how Tolkien intended it. I think, in his own traditionalist, cloistered-academic, Catholic way, he was pretty egalitarian. He doesn't treat the ruling class as actually better than the working class - Sam is no less a hero than Frodo, Merry, and Pippin, all of whom are gentry or nobility, and none of them are lesser as people than Aragorn or Elrond or even Gandalf or Galadriel - even if he does view class distinctions as fundamental and immutable differences. He values friendship, peace, and the laying down of grudges (against all the problems caused by revenge, note that Éomer's first and most noble act of kingship is "accepting the Dunlendings' surrender, treating them kindly, and making peace with them", and they are so impressed by this that they too put aside a centuries-long war and help rebuild the country they helped to destroy). While he often forgets that women exist (I will die on the hill that "three out of 22 rulers of Númenor were women, despite equal inheritance being explicit" is evidence that Tolkien just did not think of women as being half the population), he is quick to defend their value in both masculine and feminine pursuits, and to express them as people outside of marriage and childbearing - and his own life, in which he married a much older divorcée from a different religious background against all voices from their families, reflects that same sense of valuing women on human terms. He is a humanist, not in the religious sense but in the sense that he values humanity above all things in his writing; he writes consistently against power for its own sake, against war as glory, and against bigotry and condemnation.

BUT

he was also a traditional, dyed-in-the-wool Tory, Catholic-restorationist, pro-feudal Oxford don who was raised in a much more conservative time, place, and social class than most of us, and he brings that to his writing too. From a conservative perspective, reading with an eye for right-wing ideas:

Éowyn ultimately turns from the aberration of being a warrior and becomes a wife and mother, embracing "feminine" traits of healing and caring as part of her own healing.

Class is reified through Sam's heroism being that of a servant, and Aragorn's that of a king, and the return of the king is the source of great rejoicing.

Some races, and some classes, are simply better at things. Dwarves are better craftsmen. Men are better warriors. Elves are better at everything because they're special. they are also tall and fair and European

The idyllic Shire is a cottagecore dream of traditional British rural life, in which people know their place, women are real women, and everyone has good manners.

Most of the "good" societies are coded with European or Classical trappings (the exception is actually Gondor, which is pretty easily read as Byzantine), and opposed against a literal rampaging horde from the East. Some of the horde from the East are literally inhuman, while others are elephant-riding brutes who hold oblique historical grudges and strange religious customs. Compassion against these foreign invaders is looked upon favourably by the narrative, but only after you've killed them.

With the previous point, and the films, in mind, it is easy to conclude that regardless of species diversity, the Fellowship is a cadre of brave white men fighting to protect their society from a monstrous foreign threat - one in which a cunning trickster from within the main setting has puppeted the less evolved races into destroying Western civilisation.

While the story is anti-war, it is anti-war in a way that allows for cool battle scenes and noble deaths, and there are several points at which Dying For A Cause is lionised and seen as redemptive in a way that slots nicely into a lot of more militaristic ideologies (including fascism).

again, I cannot underline enough, I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS IS A FAIR READING OF THE NARRATIVE. I think it's an ideologically-motivated reading that ignores both Tolkien's personal views and large chunks of the text. But the thing is: the people who read it in the way I've described would probably say the same thing of your description.

The thing about Tolkien's much-discussed distaste for intentional allegory is: Lord of the Rings is not 1984. It is not an explicit political polemic. It is one man unpacking his Great War trauma and political anxieties, his expertise in Anglo-Saxon literature, his special interests in folklore and etymology, his love of the English countryside and his dislike of modernity, his Catholicism and his conservatism and his egalitarianism and his loneliness and his loves. It is not absolute in its politics, because it isn't trying to give you a political solution: it's trying to give you morals, yes, but they're as much personal ones as societal ones.

It is not a shock that right-wingers latch onto Tolkien's work, or see parts of their beliefs reflected there. It's still a fucking insult to the work, but it's not a shock.

Seeing conservatives and bigots being fans of Tolkien works is a special type of jumpscare bcs what are you doing here man? In the franchise about folks from different backgrounds and races come together in brotherhood to vanquish the villain? Where kindness and compassion and sinple happiness were seen as the best ways to keep evil at bay? Where war is not glorified and seen as a grim necessity to the point where the son of the author gor criticised the movies for glorifying the war too much? Where men openly engaged in feminine activities and were open about emotions other than anger? Where multiple characters gender presentation varied from those we normally associate with their gender? Where women were empowered in multiple different ways? Where greed was presented as turning one into a literal monster?Where the villains are all thinly veiled depictions of capitalism? Where care for the enviornment is seen as a given?

[gallifreyan85]

highkey im LOVING all ur agathaxreader fics im literally in a pool of tears when i read each one and I LOVE IT SO MUCHHHHHH ILOVEIT AND ILOVEUFORMAKINGIT,,, so pls dont explode anytime in the near future i need more fics, i literally need one everyday its now a drug ts insane i have a fic req, if u could make a 'tell ur baby that im ur baby' - i bet on losing dogs, where someone gets jealous that someone else is getting more attention that them, ex agatha losing her self bc she saw u hugging ur old teacher or reader crying themself to sleep because they think agatha likes billy more than them :) PLSPSLSPLSLPSLPSLPSLP I BEG OF U MAKE ONE IM GONNA DIE ILYSM IF U DO

Hii, I'm sorry if this took too long, I was traveling and then had college stuff, so I was in a bit of a hustle. I had started writing this and then kind of got off track a little (hence the title being different), but I tried to keep it around the whole reader thinking agatha prefers billy now, and all that jazz. I hope you like it, if you're not happy tell me, it has a bit more dialogue than my usual fics, but hopefully it'll be okay. Thanks for the request!!

<3

Hurt Me and Tell Me You're Mine

summary: Summary: after Wanda closed the hex, things got complicated. Now you’re on the witches road with your mentor after not seeing her for three years, and she brought someone who you think might be your replacement (Billy.) With everyone reeling after what happened during the third trial, you try to talk to her and sort things out.

pairing: mentor!Agatha x reader

A/n: as always, more stuff at the end, this was originally supposed to be part 5 of (𝐼 𝒲𝒶𝓃𝓉) 𝒩𝑜 𝑀𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝒯𝒽𝒶𝓃 𝒯𝒽𝒾𝓈 but I have something else planned for that sooo. idk. it's my bday tomorrow i'm a bit chaotic. enjoy!!

The Witches Road was no place for the faint of heart. You’d learned that the hard way, first getting drenched during Jen’s trial, then almost burning to death because of a curse during Alice’s. When Teen had gotten hurt you caught a glimpse of something in Agatha’s eyes, the way she lingered for just a moment too long after everyone had already made sure he was okay. It had been three years since you’d last seen her and you wanted to sit down and talk, catch up for lack of a better, less normal word, but time didn’t seem to be on your side. And it seemed Agatha wasn’t either. You’d been her student, if that was what you could call it, and she was relentless and strict and sarcastic, but she’d taught you things about magic no other witch ever would. You were sure of it. Her view on magic was all control and precision, yet chaos and power at the same time.

It was a lot.

It was unique.

But you didn’t regret it.

You still wondered if maybe she did. She never told you. In fact, ever since you barged in to find her and this other boy around your age in her house, along with a bunch of witches you didn’t know, she kept quiet around you. So you came along. Of course it would be dangerous, like everything else she ever did, but you could handle it. You didn’t spend three years perfecting your magic best as you could to flake out at the slightest opportunity of chaos. Maybe you were like her after all. And then her trial came along. You were there with the rest of them, on Teen’s side when the others tried to turn on her, and then her mother’s ghost was there, and Agatha was pleading with them, pleading, not to leave her behind, and Alice stepped in, and--

You shook the memory out of your head. Tried to clear your thoughts. It didn’t really work, apart from giving your already minor headache a boost, but you sighed and tried to relax anyway. Being tense would get you nowhere.

It was then that you realized the rest of the coven, whoever was left-- had finally stopped arguing. You turned to see Jen and Lilia talking to Teen, all three of them sitting down, not sparing you a glance. Neither Agatha or Rio were in sight. You sighed. While you did wonder about Rio, who she was and why Agatha seemed to hate her so much, you didn’t feel up to going to look for her. You wanted to find Agatha. And with the others preoccupied, this was your chance.

So, quietly, unnoticed by anyone, you slipped away from the path and onto a little clearing, hoping that Agatha didn’t go far. You’d learned that the trial would be ahead of you whichever way you went, but that didn’t mean you were eager to wonder around such a place alone. You had just spotted something resembling a small pond, or maybe more of a swamp-- it was covered with weeds and tall, wet grass hanging from overhead branches from the trees-- when a voice made you jump.

“You never were very good at following the rules.” Agatha stepped out from a dark nook you hadn’t even noticed, a distant smirk on her face, not quite reaching her eyes, “But then again, that was part of why I liked you.”

You turned around to see her striding towards you in a slow, seemingly composed way, hands shoved in her coat pockets.

“Liked?” you murmured quietly.

She chuckled.

“I did share my very vast magical knowledge with you. Be a little grateful.”

You stayed quiet. Her smirk, which you suspected was fake, fell into something of a contemplative expression. She seemed… less sure of herself.

It unnerved you a little.

“Stray not from the path,” she went on, her voice a teasing lilt. “And yet…”

“I was looking for you.” you murmured.

“Still, it’s no excuse.” she huffed faintly, coming to a stop next to you, blue eyes fixed on the muddy pond. “We’re already down one person. You shouldn’t wander off unless you wanna be number two.”

“Three.” you said faintly.

She gave you a confused look.

“Sharon Davis?” you gestured around the air to no avail. Agatha frowned.

“Who?”

You sighed. “The gardening lady.”

Her nose scrunched, a vague scoff escaping her. “Oh. Right. Two people then. But the point still stands.”

And then--

“Why are you here?”

You stayed quiet. She frowned.

“Pet—”

“You used to call me that all the time.” you said softly. She didn’t look at you.

“Did I?”

“Yes. Now you just use my name. It’s…” What was it? Odd, unnatural, distant-- too distant.

You knew she didn’t care for you in any soft, affectionate way, of course she didn’t, but you felt like she was purposefully being vague and quiet towards you. Maybe it was the three years of not talking. Maybe she already forgot about you. What were you really? A student? How many of those she must’ve had over the years, dozens, maybe hundreds, and you were just one in the long line of Agatha Harkness wannabes, making yourself think she had it in her to become fond of you.

Maybe she did. Or so you thought. The hope you held had slowly started to die out from the moment you stepped into her basement. When you turned to look at her her head was held high, one hand running through her hair, the other somewhere along her side, half hidden by that blue coat, fingers grasping around nothing as if she was perfecting an invisible spell.

“Did you get it back?” you asked quietly blurting out your thoughts.

She paused.

You weren’t sure if she was expecting you to ask about Alice, or what happened, why it happened, but you didn’t. Selfishly enough, you were meaning to keep on track for trying to get her to talk to you. To bridge that gap that was somehow there no matter how hard you tried to follow her, agree to her ideas, watch her when she was watching someone else.

“No.” she said flatly. “Not all the way, at least.” she raised a hand, twisted her fingers, and you watched as a small cloud of warm orange light slipped around her empty palm, swirled for a moment, and then vanished into a puff of smoke.

She wasn’t looking at it. Her eyes were fixed on some distant spot, far beyond the forest.

“That’s still something.” you tried to sound optimistic. “Something’s better than nothing.”

She scoffed, shoving her hands back into her pockets.

“You always were so cheerful. I suppose you’re right, sure. But this is nothing compared to—” she paused. You could see the inner turmoil in her eyes, that quiet fury mixed with longing.

“It’s different.” she said, turning away. “If it had been someone like Wanda—”

“I tried to find her, you know.” you said quietly.

You thought she’d at least turn to look at you. She didn’t.

“And?”

“People say she’s dead. I’m...not too sure. They didn’t even find her body, but…”

Agatha huffed. “You could’ve done something useful.”

You frowned.

What? Was she serious?

“I did it for you.” you said, firmly, a little surprised, almost desperate, “I was doing it to help you—”

“Well a lot of good that did.” she sighed.

You fell silent. Hurt. You saw her gaze flick over your face, and something sharp softened in her blue eyes.

“What did you think you’d do? If you...found her.”

“I would’ve asked her to lift that- that spell. Whatever it was.”

She tilted her head.

“Why?”

Because I wanted to help. Because you’re the only person I can call family, the only one who-

You decided to be honest.

“Because I-- missed you.”

She didn’t say anything. You thought you saw her huff, lightly, glance away-- but maybe it was all in your head.

She was turned away from you, her head towards the faint chatter of the others, Teen talking to Lilia, their voices carrying through the thicket of the underbrush. You felt a wave of frustration course through you.

“Agatha.” you said.

She turned. Perfect posture, perfect teeth, sharp smile in place.

“Yes?”

And no words left you. A part of you maybe wanted to scream. To ask her why she was acting like this, so distant, so unlike her to be gloating so much, the lack of teasing little taunts murmured to you in passing. Instead she was just… quiet. Yes, she teased the others, but you? It was almost as if she was ignoring you.

“Are you going to stand there and gawk at me or are you going to speak?” she asked, enunciating every word with clear precision.

That felt more like her. Something eased inside of you, a familiarity, a warmth, at her voice saying things you were used to. Things you wouldn’t admit you so dearly missed in your time apart.

You took a breath. “Why are you so curious about him?” you blurted.

It wasn’t what you were meaning to ask, your preferred response would’ve been something like ‘can you let me in on what’s going on’ or ‘are you mad at me’ and now she was looking at you like that, like you just asked her something very funny and amusing and she looked smug. More like the Agatha you knew. It hurt a little as much as it soothed. You wondered briefly if you would die with her one day, just like this, meet your end stuck in some nevereding loop of running after the affection of someone who might not even want you anymore, not in her coven, not as her student, definitely not as a daughte--

“Oooh.” she smirked, tilting her head, “is someone feeling left out?”

You crossed your arms. Your insides were screaming yes, yes I am, why are you so interested in him, why won’t you talk to me, I was there first-

Instead you just said, “No.”

She smiled. “No? Are you sure, dear? I do know you very well, and-”

“All this time you’ve been watching him.” you said, looking down at the murky water below, “I want to know why. And it’s not just boredom, you don’t look like that at the people you’re not trying to figure out. So why him? Is it the sigil? Or what?”

Agatha sighed. “And you’ve been watching me, have you?”

You were. You were always watching her, even before, when she was your mentor officially, watching the hand movements, the way she countered spells, cast shields and blasted hexes and walked around with that impeccable, unflinching flair.

“I just wanna know why you’re so interested in him.” you murmured. “He’s just some kid, same as me, and I was here first.”

She paused, lips curving just a little bit upwards.

But she didn’t answer.

You sighed.

Looked down.

Took another breath.

“Okay, fine. Don’t tell me. Just-- why-- at least tell me why you’re acting like this? What id it, what did I do? Did I do something wrong, are you- are you mad at me?”

At that, her expression changed. It was almost imperceptible, but you caught it easily, a softer shift in her stoic exterior.

“No.” she said after a moment. Her voice was quiet. “I’m not mad at you. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

You felt something deep inside your heart unwind, relief flowing through your veins, a hope growing brighter-- “Then why?” you uttered, your own voice quieter too, slightly uneven despite your attempts at keeping your composure.

“Because,” she sighed finally, turning back to look at you, “you weren’t supposed to be here. You weren’t supposed to come with us.”

You frowned.

“What?”

She pressed her lips together, frustrated.

“None of this was supposed to happen, toots. No trials, no—” she gestured blindly around, annoyed, “middle-of-the-woods cabins and ghosts and—” she met your eyes, “no Road.”

You paused, not following.

“What do you mean no Road?”

“The Witches Road, it doesn’t exist.” she said.

You stared at her. Blinked. Still didn’t understand.

“But-- it does. It does exist- we’re on it, right now. We’re here-- this is real.”

“Yes.” she nodded, something darker in her eyes. “It’s real. And the question is, who made it real?”

You followed her gaze over to the others. Stopped. Finally understood.

“You think he made the road?”

She waited. “I had my suspicions from the start, but now I’m sure.”

“You’re sure.” you tried to read her thoughts and came up blank. “So he’s a powerful witch, you mean. Powerful enough to make all of this? You think he made-- everything around us, right now?”

She nodded, quiet, and turned to meet your eye, voice low.

“Yes. That much power in someone so young,” you swallowed down a sting of something unfair, “it’s a precious thing. Needs to be handled carefully, or else…”

“Now you’re saying he’s precious?”

“I’m saying his power is precious, and that’s really sweet actually.”

You frowned.

“How much you seem to care what I think about him. I never took you for the jealous type, pet, but here we are.”

“I’m not—” you swallowed. “jealous.”

She chuckled. “No. Of course not. You’re just worried your dear old mentor might’ve found a new favourite student.”

“I’m your only student. And he’s not-- Agatha—”

“It’s alright, pet.” she murmured. “You know you’ll always be my favourite.”

You died there, maybe. Those were the words you needed to hear, however pathetic, however needy, they made something settle inside of you, the frustration-turned-desperation melting to relief, to ease, and more hope.

You hugged her.

She wasn’t expecting it, not at all, and made out a slightly startled oof- as you wrapped your arms around her so tight, holding on for dear life, face tucked into her coat.

“Why does everything have to be filled with sentimental nonsense when it comes to you, hm?” she asked, but you already felt her arms coming up around you, hands that pulled so much life out of others smoothing over your back in a comforting gesture. You didn’t know for sure when the tears gathered in your eyes, but before you had a chance to stop them they were falling down your cheeks, and into the mess of her curled, dark hair. You sniffled.

She let out a sigh, as if this exhausted her to the utmost level, and ran her fingers through your tangled hair.

“There, there.” she said, a little awkwardly, voice laced with exasperation. “You’re okay.”

And you nodded, because she was right, you were okay, and you were fine--

“I thought you-” your breath hitched, “you might be mad at me for- for not coming back so soon- I was trying- I t-tried—”

She exhaled softly, a thousand heavy regrets in her heart, and shook her head.

“It doesn’t matter, darling.”

“But it does,” you insisted, “it does matter, I should’ve found a way-- and instead he—”

“He isn’t my favourite, only student, and he’s not my-”

“Your what?” you made out quietly.

“He’s not my anything.” she said. “You are.”

That was enough. Enough to ease your worries once and for all, all the untrue thoughts your mind had conjured up about you in the dead of night, that she might hate you, might not want you around anymore, that she found someone better- easier to teach, better at learning-

She pulled away from you with a quiet look, her eyes on you, studying your tearful face.

“What?” you murmured shakily.

“You really care, don’t you.”

“Of course I do-”

She turned away a little, only slightly, like she was maybe unsure if you should see. Her eyes were pale as always, blue and set like cloudy weather, and she had the look of someone so composed on the outside yet hiding a storm on the inside. That was most of her life, you realized at some point while staying with her before. Always so distant, yet so much emotion raging inside. You looked into her eyes and wondered if you were seeing a glimmer of regret. What she did to Alice was a reminder of who you were dealing with, that she wasn’t some friendly, smiling witch or sleepover buddy, but you weren’t about to turn your back on her like the rest of them. Not now. Not here. You might not agree with her morals, but this was something you knew when you begged her to let you join her. You knew what you were signing up for. Witchcraft wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows and Agatha Harkness wasn’t a cold-blooded psycho, not like everyone said or thought. You knew her. Deep down, quietly and from the sidelines, but you did. You believed that and you hoped she knew that too.

You wiped your eyes, quiet and careful, and stilled when she rose one hand and swiped off the liquid on your cheek with her thumb.

And you asked what kept lingering in the back of your mind since you all left the last trial.

“Agatha?”

“Hm?”

“Why didn’t you ask me?”

She tilted her head. “Asked you what?”

“To give you my magic. Juice you up, whatever you call it. I could’ve blasted you with it.”

She stilled just slightly, an almost-smile on her lips. “And you would’ve let me?”

“If you asked me, yes.”

“How do you know I just wouldn’t kill you?” she asked.

The truth was, you didn’t. You hoped she wouldn’t, but it was all a slippery slope. You did trust her. Not just a little. Maybe too much. You definitely believed her when she spoke about being on the Witches Road before. And you would’ve let her take some of your magic too. Naively, maybe, you also believed she wouldn’t have killed you. That maybe, somehow, she would’ve stopped just on the brink, and it would leave you slumped over and heaving and panting but alive. You were so close to stepping in when Alice did it first. Would it have been different if it had been you? Would you have saved a life, or exchanged it for your own?

Beside, quietly, Agatha said, “You don’t know what it’s like, dear. All that power, surging into you, it’s like breathing air after being underwater for too long. It’s all you need to do until you feel better. Until you catch your breath. Some could survive that. Some couldn’t. But Alice never stood a chance. And neither would you.”

That stung.

“You think we’re too weak?”

But Agatha shook her head, the look in her eyes almost remorseful. “No. Not that. But it was three long years. Anyone to blast me with even a spark of it was guaranteed to…” she stopped. “It’s not an easy thing, this.” she said, quietly. “Most days I love it. It’s saved me more times than I can count. But it’s not always the easiest to control. Do you think you could make yourself stop breathing the second you took that first breath of air after being down for so long? For three years?I’m glad it wasn’t you.” she said, and you were surprised to her the firm conviction of her tone, “I’m not glad it was her, but I’m glad it wasn’t you. I don’t know what I would’ve done if—”

She didn’t finish her sentence. There was a gentleness in her gaze you oh so missed, that soft look she gave you after saying something far too soft and indulging you in it. Her hand gently fixed your hair, tucking away a strand gently behind your ear.

And you didn’t know what to say so you just stood there, looking at her, feeling like you might cry all over again.

“So we’re on the same team?” you murmured. “Not like, the coven, them, and you and me. I just mean, us.”

She smiled. A fragile, uncertain smile, but it was there. Guarded. Healing. Safe.

“You and me.” she said back, “I promise, kid.”

For a brief moment, neither of you said anything. You felt the moment settle. Dissolve.

“We should probably get back to the others.” she said. “The sooner we finish this thing the sooner we can get home.”

Home? You turned to look at her, but she was already strolling away, posture poised, head up, back straight, that blue coat flapping behind her like a loyal apprentice, instead of you. You watched her for a moment, walking with her back to you, no doubt rather unwelcome now with the rest of the group.

You couldn’t blame them.

But you shoved your own guilt over it down. Perhaps they’d hate you for it, but you’d stay on her side. Just like before, just like always. There were times when even people like Agatha needed someone in their corner, and you swore to yourself you’d stay though the worst of it, where so many others turned their backs on her and left.

And so, with a purposeful stride in your step, you turned away from the lake and followed her back to the others. There was another adventure to come.

A/n: this wasn't proofread, i'm sorry. title is from Diet Mountain Dew (The Flight Demo) by Lana Del Ray. send me your thoughts on agatha or anything else, I love to talk with yall!!! I had a lot of college exams these last few days and tomorrow I'll be 21 (I literally do not feel old enough) but life goes on and what can you do. Thank you for reading and I hope you're all good and have a wonderful day!

Taglist 💜 @milflovers4 @senhorita-girassol @dandelions4us @kaymariesworld @ahintofchaos @atlasimagines

[kelocitta]

what did you think of watcher? i noticed a good few people dropped the dlc because of high expectations and how different it felt from the rest of the game. which is a shame because it gets very good but that's how rain world goes.

[Non-spoiler Answer] I liked it! I was actually one of the beta testers for it and distinctly we were all super thrilled with the overall way it 'felt' because it did actually feel like vanilla RW again. It's not 1-to-1 obviously, but it was super nice to go back to that more esoteric wandering game than what Downpour was- which was very much a very distinctly more 'normal game' experience. Its got a few quirks that need some more evening out, either due to time constraints or just being a hard thing to balance without a bigger playbase, and hopefully they will be. There's also the issue of anti-spoiler rush to finish things before everyone starts posting about it, which means people get irritated easier or frustrated when progress isn't consistent, they only want the big reveals and bits or lore and are considering the process of getting to those a blockade rather than the game. I think a lot of people just forgot what its like to play vanilla Rain World, or at least didn't remember what its like to play vanilla Rain World without a wiki open or a guiding hand. Cause if you were playing RW truly blind, c'mon, this was a game where you wandered through a couple ecosystems until you effectively climb into a plot once you get up the leg and into Five Pebbles and someone can actually talk to you and point you towards a more physical goal, and even then most players who ascended had no clue what was happening, much less why. The pearls are fun but lets be real, most of us read those on the wiki and not painstakingly delivered all of them for the bits of bite-sized region lore. Rain World has always been like that, it was why it was so much more niche prior to DP- some people grew to love that quirk but most people bounced off hard cause of it. I enjoy Downpour but it's design philosophy is miles different, and in a much more accessible and appealing way. With that said, I think it has a great story, and one that is frankly, much more obvious and at the forefront of it than base RW. People saying it doesn't have a plot are insane imo, its extremely there, minus the initial wandering the (at least the first) goal and plotline is not at all vague. I was also pleasantly surprised by some fringe things I got correct, or at least put my thumb on at some point, lmao.

[Small Spoilers about a small game design choice of the DLC, not plot]

One thing I'm surprised lots of people didn't like was actually the region cross-warp mechanic, I get why they don't like- things don't connect into each other in a sensical, worldbuild-y type way, but for me, who was someone who had a pretty big gripe with Downpour's 'Bubble Narrative' choices in how it was laid out it felt super cool to have this implication of an impossibly large, tangled world where you don't and can't know how everything is laid out. Everything in Downpour takes place in Five Pebble's immediate area. The creatures are consistent across the timelines (Not in distribution, things go extinct or change locations, but nothing distinctly new 'comes in' despite the massive world changes.) It makes the whole thing feel like a terrarium, where you can see it all despite the fact you shouldn't, that you don't have the right to know everything about the world. The fact that you aren't getting the full regions, that you really can't tell how they all connect- how much of the world is inbetween them, whether these areas are actually physically connected- its delicious to me frankly! The world is so big, so complicated, and you only ever get snippets of it. You are denied the full picture of life, its impossibly big- the world stretches out so far. Its the kind of the design that says 'hey, all those fan regions people make? Maybe those are all out there, somewhere, they fit into this grand puzzle but you'll never know where or how' I like that! The world is big and complex and unknowable again! We've seen outside the Five Pebbles bubble and were told only a scrap. I actually really like how jumbled up everything is after vanilla and downpour, I like thinking that the world map we have is full of empty spaces and unknowns in how all these places bleed into each other. I can understand why people miss the connections, or the pearls, but frankly I really like the spin they put on the exploration mechanic to spread things away from FP that isn't just 'make the bubble bigger'

[qoldenskies]

Thinking about Rise Splinter hate… it always makes me kinda sad. Like YEAH, it wasn’t right the way he treated the boys. But like, Rise is really good at expressing subtle familial dynamics, and one of the big ones for me is the fact that like… there’s always an undercurrent of “It’s complicated” to their interaction with Splinter. IRL, it always pisses me off to see people casting judgments on people’s relationships with their family, because you don’t know!! Yeah, they hurt you, but not everything’s black and white. It’s complicated. Because you love them, and sometimes you get to understand a little bit better why things happened as you get older.

In a matter of smaller importance, hate for him loses so many opportunities in his character… even things that might just be kinda off-handedly mentioned.

He fought for SEVEN years—give me Splinter with chronic pain. Splinter relating to his boys with their neurodivergence—it’s HIS fault they have it!!!

That was seven years of imprisonment, or even simpler, an abusive relationship. What did he learn from that? How did he change? What things are skewed in his worldview?

His childhood! We saw his relationship with his grandfather a bit, but how did Splinter grow into his dream of being a movies star? HIM BEING A MOVIE STAR. He was both a rebellious team and a literal celebrity, this guy probably took empyrean at some point without knowing it, just like. Recreationally or something LMAO.

I maybe just need more of his old man knowledge. Him being so loser-core was a great move by the Rise team, and I could SEE where his story was going—ROBBED. We were ROBBED.

splinter hate is CRAAAAZY when he's such an INTERESTING character who does actually have a lot of obvious depth. like he's goofy and he's objectively flawed as a parent but he does go out of his way to improve himself and LEARN throughout the show, and he does listen and apologize when he knows he's messed up. his issues are so similar to leo's actually, leo's a kid so he's got more leeway to be shitty but idk when people act like its endearing on him and not on splinter. splinter's hilarious free my man

on the other side of the coin i dont really like when people make him a perfect loving parent either,,, i think people going for all kinds of interpretations in order to serve whatever story they need is fine but i do prefer kind of messy parent splinter, i think its kind of sad to see him reduced down to bad or good. he LOVES his boys so dearly and he would NEVER intentionally want to hurt them, but he's quick to cast judgement when he's angered/feels disrespected (evil league of mutants comes to mind, but also in turtle dega nights when donnie first stops the tank) and he's really a lot more inattentive than he should be. but there are REASONS behind this, coming out of an abusive relationship, fighting in bloodsports against his consent for years, you could probably count the whole draxum thing as traumatic (its presented as kind of silly in the show, but considering what it lead to,, its a pivotal moment in the backstory. its one of those things that i reasonably feel can be recontextualized because its so essential) and then dealing with crippling body dysmorphia and being forced into the sewers with no company other than his children,, it really adds up

idk like ,,,, you can still be extremely traumatized and be a horrible parent. in fact trauma can be a direct CAUSE of being a bad parent because that kind of thing influences every facet of your life and if youre unprepared emotionally, yeah. but splinter isn't the kind of person to double down and become more overtly nasty when he feels cornered. if he gets the feeling that his kids are actually upset with him, he backtracks. this is actually kind of a key trait of his, that he does try very hard to correct himself when he messes up. he's communicative and apologetic, and he tries very hard to be that way.

and also this is maybe something that i just have a wider problem with when it comes to the way people interpret things in cartoons at times but splinter's actions in eps like lair games (especially in lair games) and flushed but never forgotten are meant to be like. jokes. its absurdist comedy that's meant to catch you off guard. there are more serious emotional beats in rise you can use but i think when youre adapting this world and characters into a more serious tone you have to keep that kind of thing in mind because some things are meant to be surprising and absurd for the sake of making you laugh. i think the best comparison i can think of is how in musical movies they're not actually singing (in most cases, sometimes the fact that they actually are is played for laughs it depends. but yk what i mean). the joke is that this is kind of a shitty thing he's doing but taking the actions themselves seriously in a vacuum in order to cast shame on a character has always been odd to me. that'd be like calling raph abusive for rolling up the window on mikey's neck in late fee. or calling the teetz murderers because they caused a robot mass suicide that one time. it just doesnt make any sense

[artbyblastweave]

Draft a proposal to fix the x-men.

To the extent that the X-Men need to be fixed, the problem, more than probably any other superhero, is that they never fucking end; they can't end. Every civil rights movement they've ever been pegged as a metaphor for has made some kind of forward progress over the decades, but the people who can fly are somehow stuck on a treadmill. We're on the sixth or seventh "mutants on the brink of extinction" scenario; McKay just did, what, the fourth instance of Xavier Fucking Off Forever, For Real This Time, Pinkie Promise? Even if it was objectively incredibly well written it can't claw its way out from under the weight of the fact that it's all been done. And it'll be done again. Making it a single, finite story that fucking ends, or at least advances the fucking setting, is all that actually needs to happen. X-Men: Evolution but it runs for five seasons and gets to tie everything up. Claremont took a stab at this with X-Men: The End, although I haven't read it and can't attest to its quality one way or another. And, of course, Ultimate Marvel made them a finite property in its own roundabout, widely despised way.

Option two, (really option 1.5 since these aren't mutually exclusive) is to make the story an explicit period piece, ideally either in the 1960s or the 1980s. The 1980s would allow you to tap into and play with the zeitgeist that produced the version of the team that people actually give a shit about (which, come to think of it, is what X-Men 97 is already doing;) it's also the point at which the Marvel timeline really started to terminally arrest into comic-book time; the ANAD lineup have been around for fifty years but they're still the New Guys, to me. Positioning the X-Men as the comparative New Kids on the Block compared to the old guard of the Avengers, Fantastic Four and so on lets you pin the disparity in their public treatment of mutant and non-mutant heroes as the result of the increased saliency of mutants from the mid-70s onward. Claremont's run was already deliberately plugged into the politics of the back half of the cold war in a lot of different ways; Magneto as an aging concentration-camp survivor turned mutant Zionist, Storm having been orphaned by French Bombers during the Suez crisis, evil televangelists as antagonists, a whole mess of stuff with a lot of historical specificity.

If not the 1980s, my other pick would be to set the thing in the 60s. Mutants are fundamentally a product of the atomic age, fleetingly and hand-wavingly identified as the delayed byproduct of the testing and use of nuclear weaponry, but 60s X-Men really weren't engaging with the politics of any of that; or really any kind of complicated politics at all; it wasn't a civil rights metaphor except retroactively. But in this pitch it could be more directly plugged into that political moment, ideally in tactful and non-stupid ways. There's tons of ways in which the non-metaphorical minorities at the heart of the civil rights movement bore the brunt of American nuclear testing and similar scientific misadventures; the idea that mutants were created by the same government now frantically trying to oppress the cat back into the bag is a pitch with a lot of legs. Ultimate Marvel understood this, although the idiom was filtered through the lens of genetic engineering is the new nuke, and nobody liked the punchline because Jeff Loeb delivered it in the trainwreck that was Ultimatum. Deniz Camp has implemented similar ideas to what I'm talking about here on the Hulk side of things, with the New Ultimate She-Hulk being the byproduct of illicit gamma bomb testing on Pacific Islanders. To cap this all off I've mentioned before that a 1960s retrofuturistic nuclear age X-Men would act as a great foil to a 1930s-situated first wave of heroes- Teenaged Rebels and Heartthrobs on the heels of the Greatest Generation. It could be made to rhyme.

[nightsandreala]

Continuing potential Nightmaren design inspirations… Reala time :) I wanted to save him for later but today is ✨ his day ✨

Not much new stuff, but he actually has a lot of canon design lore already 👀

All together, the Nightmarens are made to resemble a circus group, and of course NiGHTS and Reala as jesters. Jester-like designs were chosen due to jesters being able to be seen as either cute and funny or as sinister— and Reala reflects the latter part of that (source)

Naoto Ohshima: “By the time the character of NiGHTS was complete, many different versions of NiGHTS had been created, but the one that brought together the “cool and cute” parts was what became the current NiGHTS. And then, Reala was created by collecting the “scary and frightening” parts. They are two beings of light and darkness, with equal abilities but contrasting personalities.” (Full post here)

Further than that, Reala is meant to represent reality whereas NiGHTS represents dreams:

“In this nightmare world, only Reala is different. He asks us to "face reality!" and "don't let your dreams control you!" Yes, we can't live on dreams alone, and we need Reala. I think all the characters in NiGHTS are necessary for us.” (source)

Reala’s main colors— gray/white, red, black, and yellow— are more natural in comparison to NiGHTS’ more fantastical purple and pink. This could also be the reason NiGHTS’ design is more “complicated,” with a full suit for an outfit while Reala just has a simple vest to wear. Some have also suggested that Reala’s colors and features may be meant to invoke a corpse-like design, with pale skin and yellow nails. His blue-purple-red diamond pattern might also be a continuation of the reality vs. dreams theme, with blue representing dreams in their entirety, purple representing a middle ground/crossing between dreams and reality, and red reprsenting reality in its entirety.

This part is pretty well known, but Reala’s final design was made through a combination of two previous designs by Ohshima and Kazuyuki Hoshino. Also, Ohshima has posted that Reala’s final colors were decided by Hoshino, too (source, goes through the whole thread)

I’ve posted about this theory before, but one potential design inspiration I’ve thought of for Reala is a wrestling heel. Heels play an antagonistic role in matches, similar to the role a lot of fans assume Reala might have played before NiGHTS’ rebellion: they would befriend visitors and help them gather their Ideya, then Reala would come in to steal them (similar to what Reala says the two of them are doing in Helen’s Memory Forest cutscene)

As seen in the second image, heels are also known for a focus on physical moves rather than those requiring more technical skill (which may explain why Reala is designed with muscles while NiGHTS isn’t), as well as for costumes/makeup inspired by trickster-esque characters (Reala’s is also just inspired by regular clown face paint, though, lol)

While it isn’t explicitly canon, just the feeling the author of this article got from watching Reala’s gameplay, there are theories that Reala doesn’t like flying as much as NiGHTS does, either, and does it mainly as a means of scaring people:

“Watching Reala fly, I don't get the impression that he enjoys flying as much as NiGHTS does. Is it because of the Nightmarens’ inherent nature to instill fear in the human mind and enjoy it?” (Full post here). Coincidentally, Reala flies differently than NiGHTS in both games, having a different Drill Dash in NiD and different acrobatics in JoD. Both are due to oversights, but it’s cool to see this lore continues in any form they should just make it canon though tbh

[darlingdaisyfarm]

Could you ever see Ford getting into a sorta DDLG relationship with Reader? Ford doesn’t need to be referred to as daddy or anything like that, it’s just more or less the nature of the relationship

thank u for asking!! seriously. made my brain work lol because ive thought about this too. honestly a lot. and i still don’t have a clear answer

part of the reason it’s so hard to figure out is because ddlg, when we’re talking about the actual dynamic, not just internet kinky stuff, is kinda complicated. it's deeply psychological, for me its about vulnerability and being taken care of in a very dependency-coded way. and with Ford, you can’t talk about dynamics like that without talking about trauma, guilt, repression, and the constant tension between his need for control and his belief that he’s fundamentally not safe to be close to

ill hide it under the cut because it's long

i believe Ford is extremely caring. intensely so. he’s protective over those he loves and absolutely has the capacity to caretake. i mean, he’s the kind of person who would research your triggers. who would actually read articles about your mental health condition and then print them out and annotate them. he’s the kind of person who would wake you up with a glass of water and your meds without making it a big deal. who would block off certain lab sections just because “i don’t want you around the chemicals, i’m not risking that” he’s cautious and self-sacrificing and..... yeah, really tender under the layers of anxiety. he’s not cold, i don’t see him so. maybe really bad with his feelings and explaining his emotions, but he’s not THAT distant emotionally, especially not when he really loves someone, especially OLDER Ford, post-weirdmageddon, when he's finally trying to be in the world, near his brother and family, instead of just run from it.

i think, Ford is not okay with being in that role CONSCIOUSLY. let me explain!! because deep down, he doesn’t trust himself with power after nearly destroying the whole world (not his fault, but he still blames himself for it). he has done damage with it to the people he loves so much. to Stan. to McGucket. to the entire world, as he thinks of course, because of weirdmaggedon.

BUT, and this is important, if we’re talking about a dynamic where it’s very much care-focused - yeah. Ford WOULD do things like make sure you ate. he’d pack your bag if you had a big day and he knows your executive dysfunction’s acting up. he’d gently push your forehead and go “bed. now. no, i don’t care that your doomscrolling is ‘important,’ come on.” he’d tuck you in and grumble about you using your phone a lot. and he’d never call himself “daddy” that's right, but he’d say things like ”come here, sweetheart. sit still for me”, ”i’ll take care of that.”, “you don’t have to think about it right now, i’ve got you.”, ”talk to me about it” and etc

and i 1000% believe there would be days where he needs to be the one taken care of. like where he goes into a shut-down state and doesn’t eat and you have to drag him out of his work chair. and if the dynamic is mutual and based on trust and respect rather than roles, i think Ford would exist in that kind of relationship absolutely normally. it just wouldn’t be ddlg in the way most people imagine. like sexualized or through roleplay that’s too close to the thing he fears he failed at most, being responsible for someone’s wellbeing

so yeah.... :') i’m still not sure. it's just Ford is that kind of character you want to trust, you want him to take care of you especially if you're into older men lol. and i think he wants that too, to take care of someone, he just doesn’t always think he deserves it because of his past

i hope that didn’t sound weird by the way. and yeah, not my final answer either. i love getting philosophical about this stuff. i still think about it a lot. AND IF YOU HAVE YOUR OWN THOUGHTS I’D GENUINELY LOVE TO READ THEM <3

[briebysabs]

Something I’ve been meaning to touch on is the whole “KDJ didn’t break the cycle of abuse he’s terrible father” or “KDJ was the best dad y’all lack media literacy”.

Look, Kim Dokja is a human being. He was a 28 year old, lonely, borderline suicidal man who’s never loved another person other than his mother before the apocalypse started (which that itself was a complicated case). In the end, he is a reflection of his mother. Lee Sookyoung made the decisions she did, could she have made better ones? Could she have communicated with her son more? Of course but everyone understands why she made these choices.

I’m not comparing her situation to KDJ’s but more so how they handled them and its lasting effects. It all comes down to sacrificial love. KDJ loves his kids deeply, he feels as though he doesn’t deserve them. But having them see KDJ die or lose himself over and over has undeniably left them trauma. More trauma than the apocalypse itself. His love led to hurting them. I personally don’t think it means he’s a horrible father and I don’t think anyone at KimCom would see it that way either.

Kim Dokja dealt with love the only way he knew how. And everyone knows that love was the truest thing. Because lot of the time, people feel so alone that they cannot fathom that hurting themselves will cause pain to people who love them. Who cannot bear to be without them or seeing them self-destruct or suffer in silence.

I want more orv readers to understand that doesn’t make you horrible. That doesn’t make you selfless either. You’re lost and simply need help.

[ladytauria]

and lets do a "Tim got turned into a cat" au

your pick who picks him up and takes care of him

didn’t expect this to be the one i finished first but i’m not complaining. anyway you get a small snippet plus uh. more than 5 points xD

yknow for as much as i enjoy reading them i don’t think i’ve ever written OR plotted one out before!

hmmm… 🤔

very tempted to go damian for this one bc i love the whole. ‘see a different side of someone’ trope with animal transformation & when it comes to tim i find that trope yummiest w jason & dami lmao

hmmm, am thinking…

Tim gets turned either on patrol or while researching an object. I lean more toward the latter bc I like the idea of them finding him at his apartment or in his nest, and while that’s possible with the first option it’s easier/more likely with the second. And I like the idea of him having been stuck there for a short time lmao.

Could also be fun if maybe he was on research duty bc he had a broken/twisted/sprained arm or leg, so little cat Tim also has an injured limb… Teeny Tim cat with a li’l cast on…

Anyway! Damian and Dick are on patrol together when Babs asks them to check on Tim bc he hasn’t reported in over 24 hours and she just wants to make sure he’s good. Dami is aggravated to be interrupted but also he IS a little concerned bc Tim is generally prompt about his check-ins. And ofc when they get there there’s no sign of Tim, just a little black cat holding one of its paws kind of weird.

They look the place over, collect any evidence, etc. Damian makes some disparaging comments both to hide his own worry but ALSO to distract Dick from his. Def takes charge of the cat, bringing him back to the Cave/Manor to get him some food and medical attention. Maybe says something about Tim’s carelessness, which bothers Tim, making him growl/hiss/scratch at Damian.

Obviously how he acts with everyone around vs just with the cat is different; he’s less prickly when it’s just him & Timcat. The main inspo for me picking Damian and writing all of this was a couple of lines of dialogue that popped in my head when I read this. Something like—

“Just between you and me,” Damian says, his voice low and almost conspiratorial, “I find myself worried for Timothy as well.”

Tim’s ears prick slightly, his head raising ever so slightly off of his paw. His body has turned liquid under the touch of Damian’s hand; gentle yet firm as it runs over the length of his spine.

“For all of his faults, he would not have left you alone. Especially not if you were injured.” Damian’s hand stills, settling just under Tim’s shoulder blades. It’s a warm, comforting weight there—almost as comforting as the words themselves. A soft rumble starts in his torso.

As much as he tries not to care what Damian—what *anyone*—thinks, it… bothered Tim, that Damian believed he could be so callous. To know that it was an act is a relief.

Though it begs the question of *why*.

Damian scratches lightly behind one of Tim’s ears, and his eyes close without his meaning to. He tilts into it, sighing; the soft rumble in his ribs turning louder.

His questions will keep.

Not sure how they ultimately figure out that Tim is the cat, only that I do want Damian to be the one to figure it out. I also want Damian to end up doing a majority of sifting through Tim’s files—lol, maybe taking over for Bruce or Dick bc he didn’t like how they were doing it, and Tim being surprised at how well Damian knows him/his system. (Bc Damian has been studying him.)

Oh OH, also want Tim to decide to take advantage of being a cat to learn more about Damian since Damian talks to him a lot? So he learns more about how Damian feels about him but also more about Damian in general. But then maybe it gets awkward bc Damian maybe starts talking about Tim being pretty and how that just makes his feelings (jealousy, admiration, guilt) even MORE complicated.

Final thought: I kind of want this to be pre-Alfred the Cat? So Damian doesn’t have a cat at all, and Tim gets him one after bc “he knows Damian will take good care of it” and “he always wanted a cat growing up so maybe he could visit it sometimes…”. Cat could maybe be an apology for Tim letting the ruse go on, though I am thinking he DID try to signal early on, they just missed it? But anyway.

[ send me an au and i’ll tell you (at least) 5 things i would have happen in it ]

[soleminisanction]

I've always really liked DC's in-house choice of referring to their various superhero groupings as "families," but it has gotten a little frustrating recently with people both in canon and in fandom seeming to forget that families aren't just a parental-unit-and-kids formation. They're complicated, and a lot of the DC families are too messy to fit into that neat little nuclear family mode.

Which is to say... here's some scattered thoughts/summaries about how these families are actually structured in canon, because I think it's interesting:

Supers -- The smaller, more traditional Superfamily (Clark, Lois, Kara, Kon, etc.) is a pretty traditional Midwestern nuclear family, with Jimmy Olsen filling the role of close family friend/goofy neighbor sidekick (in the Silver Age, he was Kara's would-be suitor) and Steel feeling more like part of Clark's personal circle of friends. The recent line up, though, with Jon, the twins, Kong and Nat? Starts to feel more like some old dynasty or noble house, complete with fostered foundlings and the Steels acting almost like knights under a noble's banner, possibly reflective of what the House of El would have been on Krypton.

Arrows -- Might currently be the closet to a traditional nuclear family structure. You've got Ollie and Dinah, their younger sisters, Ollie's adopted and biological children, and Ollie's granddaughter through Roy, plus by some counts Roy's co-parent and her sister as "in-laws." Bonnie and Cissie King-Jones are adjacent to but not technically "part" of the family, though I believe it's implied at one point that Ollie might also be Cissie's bio-dad. Pretty straightforward, these guys are actually family and they act like it, for good and ill.

Shazam Family -- Also a literal, actual family. Not originally, the original golden age "Marvel Family" was considerably more complicated and only Billy and Mary were full siblings, but nowadays the whole point of the modern Shazam family is that they're foster siblings united by familial love and that's fantastic. Meanwhile your average Black Adam story is 75% angsty family drama, 25% Egyptian mythology references.

Flashes -- Technically closer to three nuclear families (the Allens, the Wests and the Garricks; four if you include the Quicks), two of whom are united by marriage and all of whom are bound by the Speedforce, which, given its semi-spiritual connections to things like Speedster afterlives, can act almost like a religious force that connects them to the additional members like Avery, Circuit Breaker and Max as Bart's foster-dad. They're a big, sprawling tree with more cousins than siblings, the kind of family that functionally has a reunion every Christmas and Thanksgiving.

Lanterns -- Now these guys are the exception that proves my point about the whole 'family' thing not being straightforward. The lanterns aren't a family, they're a corps. Soldiers. Space cops. Comrades-in-arms. They respect each other, have each other's backs, might even like or care about each other, but those last two are optional, and they don't have the same kind of assumed obligations towards each other that a family would have. They're friends and co-workers, not family, but that doesn't mean their relationships are less significant, they're just different.

Wonders -- Roughly half of them are either one of Hippolyta's daughters (Diana, Donna, Nubia pre-Crisis) or related to them through the gods (Cassie), and the other half (Artemis, Yara, modern-age Nubia) use sister as a term of endearment more in a utopian lesbian commune kind of way. I think they brought Steve Trevor back recently? He's basically the Ken in this equation and perfectly fine with that role. None of which should be surprising if you've seen Professor Marston and the Wonder Women.

Bats -- This is the one that people get really wrong when they try to force it into a traditional family structure. Don't let WFA fool you, the Bats are and have always been way more a snarled mess of tangled interpersonal relationships than they've ever been a cohesive family. Whether Dick is Bruce's son or his brother depends on what era you're talking about, and the former reading is much more recent than you think -- as in "started cropping up in the early 2000s" recent. Barbara is both Cassandra's sister and her mother. Duke and Steph both have living parents and neither of them want or would ever dream of treating Bruce like their dad; Tim was the same way until his dad died. None of the Robins ever lived in the mansion together, nor did Cass. Babs considered Jean-Paul Valley her brother and Huntress is so close to Tim she once hallucinated him calling her Big Sister. They're a beautiful mess of people finding places where their broken edges fit together into something that works for them and trying to reduce it down to a cozy nuclear family is just so goddamn reductive and lazy.

Blue Beetles -- Are only tangentially related to each other. Seriously, they never even get direct mentoring, each one just takes over when the previous one dies and works on completely different rules from the other two. They're complete strangers bound by a legacy and that's honestly pretty fun.

Zataras -- There's only three of them and they're literally a father, daughter and cousin.

Martians -- Not really a family because there's only the two of them, but an interesting case where the two survivors of what was functionally a war of mutually assured destruction came together in an attempt to find some peace in the aftermath of what they'd lost.

Titans -- The JLA and JSA aren't really in the "family" category, but the Titans lean into it hard, mostly because they're a textbook found family. They don't mirror a nuclear family structure, they're simply a group of people who came together to form a mutual support network. They're the idealized college friends you grew into your own with, some of them childhood companions and others you only met once you leave home for the first time, but all of them friends that you manage to maintain contact with for life, with everyone coming back together even as you scatter and do your own things.

Young Justice -- Meanwhile, this team is the chaotic group of misfits you hung out with when you were a teenager, especially when you were just starting to be allowed to act without adult supervision. You drive each other crazy, none of you know you're all queer as fuck, and you'd fight a bear for any of them even if they asked you not to. They'd probably be insulted if you tried to call them a family. They come out here to get away from their families, thank you very much.

[tammyhybrid21]

Ingo and the Pearl Clan

(A whole Lot of Thoughts)

You know, I might as well admit it, I’m currently in PLA and SubMas Station. More to the latter than the former, but they kind of go hand in hand truly. So, while I’m here, I might as well make some posts talking about things I’ve noticed in my own funky view and the complexities of interpretation... So here we go some headcanons...

Specifically, I’m going to start with some observations/headcanons for PLA Era, with Ingo and the Pearl Clan, because I have... many strong opinions about them really.

There’s not any particular order to these, nor do I particularly care how clear/concise they are to people not me, it’s more just my thoughts to be gotten down.

Mostly going to be general rambling, organized as dot points but that’s just how I do, prepare for wall of text I am not going to apologise for. Especially since I don’t have game screenshots on hand, nor do I feel like hunting them down for what’s basically stream of consciousness and self-indulgent thoughts. Also I already know a lot of this has a bias, its fandom... it’s supposed to be what we find fun/pleasing.

General Pearl Clan:

Alright, I’m going struggle here, but I feel it’s very important for me to just get a key thing out of the way first. I am very, very attached to the Found Family vibes that the Pearl Clan could have. I’m very attached to how there’s the storytelling in the subtle and unspoken with Ingo and the Pearl Clan. He’s their stranger from nowhere.

And it hurts my soul so much when people make fics where they keep outsidering him. Or worse, where Ingo outsiders himself. Now I know how his dialogue is in game... it’s not exactly showing him settled in Hisui by any means, but it really feels a lot more complicated than just open and shut he’s unhappy.

Purpose, wondering what his purpose here in Hisui is... and then the paraphrase of “Seek out All Pokémon”-- I have some conspiracy glasses on this, beyond just the he was Arceus Plan A theory... But this isn’t the place for that.

But yeah, I have a lot of complicated feelings about Ingo and the acceptance or lack of that he has in the Pearl Clan. But how can I even begin to explain them, I don’t truly know.

I just, I have a lot of emotions but not the words to put it into something digestible. But I really do not like seeing fics where the Pearl Clan is outright hostile... for all they are to us and the Galaxy Team in the game, they have valid reasons for wariness... but also, I have views and ideas on that... a general oddball headcanon that hey... what if Ingo arrived with injuries from other humans?

Or logically... maybe the clan is wary because poachers do be a thing still even in Pokémon Universe.

Seriously though, the fact Ingo is a Warden at all says a lot. Whether you want it to or not, Ingo wearing the Pearl Clan tunic and uniform as well... even if he’s clinging to his past, he’s changed. He’s adapted, I would also like to point at the Path of Solitude and Alpha battles with the FUN NOTE... Those pokémon aren’t in Pokéballs.

While his main team obviously is, and we do see him using pokéballs, it’s not like he’s entirely putting everything in a pokéball

Also this leads to the fun speculation I’ve seen of both SubMas twins having pokéglotism and I would like to say love that. So much.

N handshake SubMas Twins: If you just ask the wildlife if it wants to throw hands, the answer is usually “YES”

No but seriously, his Path of Solitude battles just start with the pokémon out and no pokéball animation... I don’t think those mon are caught either... THEY DON’T EVEN FAINT INTO POKÉBALLS!

I actually have a lot to say about Ingo in the Pearl Clan tunic and clothing, but it’s very hard to put these thoughts into proper words. But it really does say more than people want to acknowledge that he’s wearing it at all. He is adopted, he has adapted. Even with it blending with his uniform... Ingo has found more family and that’s just so important to me. Family can be many things and the Pearl Clan been community and family is just... the best take. They took him in, made him their own.

Okay, but seriously, Ingo’s adapted more than people seem to think. But that’s a mess to try and explain, mess to give any evidence or anything to. But generally, it hurts my SOUL to see takes where the Pearl Clan is only tolerating Ingo because he’s the funny guy that Lady Sneasler picked up. Let him be their funny guy who talks about things nobody not even he fully understands.

The community of it is very important to me.

Even if not perfect, leads me into a bit of a weird point where I feel a lot of Ingo’s not settled feeling that there is in Hisui is just... closure issues. Like the lack of fully knowing what he’s missing, just a longing for it... but it’s like if he did have his memory, it might be both easier and harder... because then he does know, but can he go back? He’s made a new home, new role... Jumping right into it. Anycase, it really feels like the issue is more closure to me. He’s made a home, and does belong but isn’t settled because he can’t reconcile it without the full context.

Also on this, fics where he just drops everything to go Home no hesitation leave a bad taste because it feels WRONG.

More fics where it’s a struggle emotionally, it’s a hard decision, the hardest... in a void anyway

Adore fics where the Pearl Clan hears he has the opportunity to go home and are just SO EXCITED for him.

Love is letting go, and this can go both ways and I just have... a lot of personal feelings about how the twins been separated doesn’t have to necessarily be a tragedy but I need to save it for when I have the spoons.

Actually complicated feelings on him going home at all... but not for here...

Side note, the Pearl Clan and personal space and Ingo. I personally think he would have come already ready to be respectful of it. I project my personal space and tactile issues onto him here, but honestly... with his body language and general attitude... he gives me massive vibes of very tactile but only when he’s the one initiating the contact otherwise we have issues. Also the Pearl Clan having such a thing about touch and contact is just nice I think...

At the same time, love takes where they sleep communally and Ingo’s very bewildered in the middle because help him. Sleep piles as a love language and keeping warm in the weather.

Also for the Pearl Clan, those takes where Ingo is just kind of incidentally the babysitter because he’s good with kids are just... so good. He listens to them, encourages them, and can play on their level when needed... it’s just something I love. Ingo taking care of the kids and also the pokémon of the clan.

Also with the potential pokéglotism take, just imagining the Clan been bewildered and yet fascinated with this is so FUN to me. Like he’s weird sure, but nothing wrong with that.

Side note, I feel like the masking we see in PLA is mostly as a result of Ingo stuck in Jubilife... with Kamado... who I have a MESS of opinions on depending on the day... but most of it is tea regarding the brush over of colonization and Ugh, not for here... Otherwise it’s like, Ingo’s already outside of PLA shown to be kind of insecure on his own... the more subdued twin compared to Emmet and also introvert things.

I don’t know if Ingo visits the settlement a lot, but I do think that’s probably more about the cold and snow than any lack of acceptance... and also just like, there’s a general disconnect with how things regarding the Wardens and their Clans are presented in the game... like do they even interact with their Clans after they become Warden? Ingo feels like he’s just as much involved with the rest of the Clan as Lian or Palina are... Which is to say just maybe sending a letter every so often or popping in randomly to remind people that he is still alive.

I’ll round out this section by saying my headcanon for how long Ingo’s been in Hisui and that’s seven years generally... and the reasoning is simple. I find the thought of Ingo getting the opportunity to find his way home just before he would be declared dead incredibly funny. Like man’s about to show up and pull off the funniest thing in the world.

He lived folks!

Oh actually, here is probably the place to put... I do think that Ingo’s possibly the guy in that Zorua/Zoroark Reveal Trailer... but it’s kind of hard to put into words the full thoughts on this. Is that where the memory loss came from, no. The attitude of whoever is filming in that trailer and their confusion about the “strange device” would imply it’s already afflicting him.

ALSO THE REACTION TO BEEN OUTSIDE, IT’S BEAUTIFUL... Breathtaking, Ingo do you go outside much before been thrown to the past?

I also have other conspiracy glasses for this and other things, but this is NOT the post for those things...

Speaking of Zorua/Zoroark there’s a particular ache in me when I see the Pearl Clan written as assuming Ingo is one... but that’s... an issue for its own post.

I actually think that there was at least a year or even two before Ingo officially became Lady Sneasler’s Warden. Mostly because there are some politics that would come into things. His general unknown status, the fact the clan doesn’t want to be involved in stealing him from his original space. Like, look, I have OPINIONS about this as well.

But what do you do with strays? You take them in and care for them. Ingo got hit with cat redistribution and the Pearl Clan’s dealing. Autism and cat behaviours... 

Also just genuinely, he could not become Warden without been a member of the Pearl Clan. Which goes beyond honorary even if it’s a messy view. He’s one of their family and the Noble Pokémon are family to the Clans as well. They’re all family your honor. And it’s not perfect but why should it be?

Ingo is their guy. Truly the stranger of all time.

Lady Sneasler:

She gets her own section. :3

Obviously, first up, I 100% adore every single take where Lady Sneasler found him first. It’s my most favourite thing. I absolutely love it every single time. Lady Sneasler found a guy in the snow, he’s her guy now. About 75% of the time this is the headcanon that is firmly in the forefront when I’m trying to work on my WIPs... the other 25% of the time, I think it’s incredibly funny to inflict Gaeric with an Ingo event.

Do I need to elaborate? No

The whole fandom seems to agree that Lady Sneasler basically took one look at Ingo and adopted him, and honestly, it’s the BEST headcanon ever.

“LADY SNEASLER DID YOU STEAL A WHOLE GUY?”

Give the Pearl Clan a month or two to realise he even exists for bonus points. It’s the funniest take ever IMO.

Ingo is basically like a kit to her. This is very, very similar to how I view the situation in Rain World with Five Pebbles and The Artificer... in which both parties think that they’re the one who’s in charge... but also not. I think Lady Sneasler can back her claim up somewhat, she’s definitely the one making sure that he actually learns some survival skills, beyond just the Pearl Clan taking pity on him and showing him how to survive.

Lady Sneasler 100% taught Ingo to rock climb like how she trains her Sneaslets... there’s just something in the way his dialogue vibes when he says “You would never expect to be able to climb such sheer cliffs as these, yes? But with Sneasler as an ally, it becomes the work of a moment.” Something about this just... gives me vibes like, she has spotted for him 100%. Also the idea that Ingo learns rock climbing and does it in those shoes SENDS me to a very happy place. Like yes, it’s a pleasing thought.

With the power of aura in pokémon... and adaptation... anything

He is the babysitter of the Sneaslets 100% and that fandom trend of giving Ingo a poison immunity is absolutely a lovely thing. When it surprises people is also very much a fun thing. I like to think he even was predisposed to it... because well, he does have a garbodor on his team pre-Hisui.

Just as a bonus, I think Ingo’s slipped up at least once or twice and called Lady Sneasler “Mama” because she nagged him or something... and her behaviour... also just side note, I feel as though she’s either “Lady” in terms of nickname, or much quieter and only ever internally he’s reffed her as “Chariot”.

Also she is a Noble, fandom taking Kamado’s word as law on the Rides not been Nobles frustrates me to no end. Both groups are described as descended from the blessed pokémon of the original hero.

I would also love to talk about my opinion on letting Ingo be feral hours here, but that probably deserves it’s whole own rant post alongside Emmet. Just know I definitely vibe with Ingo going a bit feral in the mountains with Lady Sneasler overlooking and have OPINIONS about it.

Clan Leader Irida:

Was not actually the Clan Leader yet when he first arrived. I have a few ideas regarding this, but mostly it’s the thought that it’s interesting. The passage of time and change, the fact the Pearl and Diamond Clans are small. The recent ending of whatever war, and Irida is young and new in her role, something the game repeats a few times.

Which for me makes me think she became the Leader just a few short years before the game events. So Irida met Ingo before she was Leader and it was the previous Leader who chose to take him in.

Also just, again, there’s so much of the disconnect that the game has between each area. Irida’s kind of rude moment of introduction with Ingo as well. Their own guy from nowhere, it’s either her implied younger age nineteen-twenty... or just that really did leave an impression on everyone, which valid you know. Just showing up like that doesn’t seem like something that would fade from memory too fast. The kind of event that gets talked about for years...

Also Irida, love her so much, she wants Ingo to be able to find himself again so much, concerned and wondering if we the player could help him.

At the same time, so rude of her to just bring that up like that...

I think Irida and Ingo have such an interesting set of options for relationship. Mutual respect and understanding, or trying to understand each other.

There’s the question of pokéballs as well, but again, I would argue Ingo actually isn’t as clinging to them as it appears. He’s more respectful of the point than you think and the odds he free roams his team for the majority of the time is HIGH. And also Irida at least in Masters does grow beyond her knee-jerk dislike of pokéballs.... especially since you know pokémon can get themselves out of them.

Transport and smoothness, Emmet is having a time when Ingo returns home and why is his brother barely using pokéballs now, Ingo please.

I like to interpret that Ingo already had his companions but not in Pokéballs until Irida became more comfortable... it’s just nice.

Anycase, head of the Ingo support club I do think. They influence each other more than you would think. I have more thoughts but it’s like, this is the kind of territory that’s almost entirely speculative. But also it’s very much like siblings in my head, they probably bother each other and have gremlin moments for as much as they respect each other.

The Other Pearl Wardens(+ Some Melli and Arezu):

SPEAKING OF SIBLING/FAMILY LIKE RELATIONSHIPS...

I have so many thoughts on the general Warden relationships and it’s such a shame that it’s all so disconnected in the game itself. Nothing really touching anything else outside the specific area that it’s introduced and then moved on from. We really have to come up with it ourselves. Which is kind of standard for Pokémon unfortunately, but still, we get some hints I guess. Daybreak does exist... but beyond that.

Ingo and Lian, Autism Buddies. Or just special interest and hyperfixation buddies. I love every fic where they just are like “Same” about rambling. Big Brother Ingo hours here, I know folks love Uncle/Dadding him but-- BUT-- No. Sibling energy is the best energy here, or maybe cousin energy if that’s too close.

Lian has definitely stolen Ingo’s hat at least once, got his own stolen right back.

Cowboy, cowboy

Got that Autism Swagger

Lian reminds Ingo of someone, but it’s just out of reach. Yes this is talking about Clay, and considering they work underground, I do think there’s association. Also the Masters event, Ingo so ready to jump in and help, no hesitation. Maybe not close, but coworkers at least, and Clay likely helped with some of the Subway Tunnels maintenance and upkeep due to crossover... Also incidentally odds of the closeness of some of those tunnels to the tunnels of the Gym.

Also just Lian makes Ingo feel comfortable and it’s echoed right back. They’re autism buddies and both can sit and just vibe together. It’s good.

Calaba is Grandma. Or the one nurse who just knows

She has treated so many injuries. Especially in the early days before Ingo improved his special awareness level, he still struggles with it truly...

Ingo stop ending up in her medical tent challenge level impossible.

She went through her whole outsider issues arc with him. He’s her grandson even if she would never willingly admit it. No, you will not hear it verbally from her. She expresses it through begrudging care and fussing and making sure he is fed... and providing his favourites. She cares so much more than she can ever admit, her pride won’t let her vocalise it.

Good thing Ingo knows

Words are good but there are many ways to show care

Ingo helps her quietly just as much

Calaba knows all his favourites whether she wants to or not

She’s also more than aware of some of his texture issues and has a special set up just for him

Palina is probably the Warden that has the least interaction with Ingo, because well, she lives at the Coastlands... and I think Ingo has Thalassophobia. That just obviously doesn’t mix. As it is they’re the most... strangers to each other of the Wardens. He thinks she sounds nice though-- Also understands her grief, but it gives him nightmares second-hand to hear about what happened to the prior Lord Arcanine.

He absolutely does not know about Palina and Iscan. No, not at all, who’s asking him?

Ingo is one of the few defenders of Palina’s choice to wait for Lord Growlithe to be ready, the loss feels... familiar.

Ingo hearing about Palina Pearl Diving, absolutely awed and terrified of her power.

Palina and Ingo both share a bit of outsider vibes. Gossip is something neither is unfamiliar with. In fact truly, gossip is more the speed they share with each other. It’s kind of awkward in full Warden Meetings because they don’t really talk or meet much outside of them. Each thinks that the other seems polite though.

In my head they’re both kind of scared of the other, it’s funny to me

Melli coming next because they share the Highlands. Also I just-- honestly love Melli, such a disaster of a human being. I think the relationship is something of a mess. Not fully defined, they range from gets along great to god I can’t stand this person between literal hours it feels. Both have spent a lot of time around each other-- closest point of contact.

The torches thing is enrichment, as well as Melli been petty to the PC specifically

Melli categorically struggles to ask for help, insecurity and pride crossloading... Ingo gets it.

Melli and Sneasler both very begrudgingly team up to make sure Ingo doesn’t just die tbh, Melli will bully this man into some self care so help him.

Melli 100% has a one-sided crush

Ingo has also 100% jumpscared Melli at night/in Wayward Cave multiple times. Him and his glowing eyes

Melli is probably deserving of his own post truthly. I will come back to him and Ingo later on. It really is its own post probably...

Gaeric is actually another character who is so interesting in my head. When it’s not Sneasler finding Ingo I like to assume Gaeric is the first one to find him. Gaeric with his big heart and absolute presence. Gaeric honestly deserves to experience an Ingo Event or two, or three. Sometimes of course it’s the other way around, Ingo’s experiencing a Gaeric event.

Gaeric speaks to me in an interesting way actually. Like, he’s related to Wulfric and maybe Brycen implied right? (Also, am I the only one who thinks he looks more like... Brycen, hello?!)-- ANYCASE, For some reason as well my brain goes “Sometimes Ingo mistakes him for Drayden” it’s the vibes.

Ingo has called Gaeric Uncle at least once, he will never live it down.

The dynamic is somewhere between siblings and uncle-nephew depending on the day

TORMENT EACH OTHER

Gaeric will drag Ingo into his exercise routine, whether Ingo wants to be dragged along or not-- Ingo will find ways to torment him right back

Both thinks the other is the weird one, but it’s a good kind of weird

Wrestling wild pokémon challenge

Both will bite honestly

Gaeric can CARRY Ingo... More shocking is when that favour is returnable

Gaeric just has such good energy and I think I need to linger on him more as well, but later maybe. He’s also definitely the first one to find Ingo in Lady Sneasler’s nest tbh. First member of the Pearl Clan to meet Ingo and it sure would be an impression. Who is this guy just chilling with Lady Sneasler hello?!

And then Ingo wrestles a dragon because Uncle Drayden

Finally we have Arezu. Who joins Ingo in Jubilife as one of the two wardens who stays there. Which is also the first time those two really meet, she wants so badly to do up his hair fancy or something-- meanwhile Ingo’s like “I like my hair the way it is thankyou” They’re bit awkward at times.

I also 100% believe their safety was held over the Clan Leaders heads during the Red Sky Incident-- conspiracy glasses

Ingo and Arezu basically just have a very polite working relationship in Jubilife. They basically know of each other and then kind of... vibe. Different circles, it’s nice to be able to at least say hi they suppose.

Bonus the PC/Akari/Rei:

Sibling hours actually.

No but seriously, Ingo has taken one look at the PC and gone “I can torment you with the Path of Solitude” and I will come back to this much later but I really have to admit, the vibes here is sibling torment. Those battles are just such a vibe... same with how he prepares the other paths and challenges.

The fucking, L

Conclusion:

The Pearl Clan loves their weirdo and Ingo loves them back even if there are some issues, but this is mostly me just really, really having AN Opinion.

I also likely will make more in depth dot point posts later on prolly... this is more just spitballing and getting the major points down for myself lol.

[docholligay]

sounds like you successfully argued to have migrants put in PRISON instead of the equivalent of a hurricane/emergency evac center :/

So i had a whole, really cutting takedown of this statement, and, in general, the smattering of bad faith engagement I've had with a post that went far beyond my usual reach so wasn't written with as many protections against folks looking for a crack in the wall.

But being mean to someone, who, in any case only believes what they are saying so far as they can be anonymous while doing it, isn't helpful. It doesn't inform you any better, it doesn't inform anyone of how to go about this stuff, it just makes feel good that I, what? Made someone on tumblr look silly? Everyone claps? Jesus Christ what a waste of life.

So, let me tell you what actually was successfully argued. What was argued was that the one place in the state that had been offered up by the politicians was rejected by its people. There may be one someday, but not here and not today.

The prison that guy mentioned? (It was not me, but you'd be forgiven for thinking it--this went around with an INSANELY, fox newsbite level, bad faith crop that made me immediately regret not editing better) It's not owned by the state. I went and looked it up later. It's owned by the Bureau of Indian Affairs. Supposedly they are running it for their own use. It's gonna be a lot harder to get them to use that.

What we successfully argued, is delaying the implementation of anything. Delaying is a huge part of resistance. Every headache you give people, every hour you cost them, is a win. We cannot afford to wait for utopia, and perfection, and a savior. Some of our greatest weapons in life are delaying, and feigned incompetence, and picking at threads. Especially if you live in a red area, sometimes you gotta go, "Oh sure, yeah, but you know, not THERE, and...no, not there either, cause of X, and, man, Y is almost a perfect place but I just can't sign off on it because..." you see what I'm saying? Oskar Schindler was arguing he needed Jewish children to polish the insides of gun barrels.

The other thing that was argued, is when the commissioner said, 'We'll bend over backward to accommodate your orders," we said, "No we won't." And that goes much further than any site. It sends a small message, that, even in a red part of a red state, not everyone is falling into line. This is why action matters.

I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, and my work in political arenas is not either. But, I have been doing stuff in political arenas since Obama, and, I have always worked here, in this very complicated place. I am an extremely pragmatic worker. I do what works. I don't care much about the appearance of goodness. Sometimes delaying a project is what it takes. Sometimes, in life, you lose anyway. But that doesn't make the delaying worthless. I have lost a lot of fights, and I am going to be set up to lose a lot more. But, today? An offer had to be withdrawn. And that's something.

I hope you come back, and reread both the post and this response, and, even if you disagree with me, have a different perspective on how political action can be approached. More than that, I want it to give you hope that even small, imperfect actions matter. The perfect is the enemy of the good. And the good is the enemy of the literally accomplished.

[system-of-a-feather]

hi, i have been thinking about the topic of fusion, and what i want my long-term goals to be, and i was wondering. do you ever feel like being fused is exhausting? not the process of fusion, i know thats exhausting because healing is exhausting. but like. do you ever feel overwhelmed due to being all parts of yourself at once? i havent experienced any fusions yet (hopefully in the future!) but ive seen people talk about how even when fused, none of the parts disappear but instead are all part of the "you" that always exists. my only frame of reference for how that feels for myself is blendy cofronting, which in my experience can be pleasant with 2 or 3 parts, but any more than that gets overwhelming and disorienting

Actually? Surprisingly? No. Not really at all honestly. The funny thing is that I used to wonder the same thing so I absolutely understand the frame of reference and perspective and assumptions that go with it, but its extremely comfortable and LOW energy to be fused for me.

The actual thing that happens is that you don't really get that "too many parts in front" fatigue like... ever or fronting fatigue like ever - at least thats how it is for me.

I relax a whole fuck ton better as a fused whole and while a lot of fusion still has me having to learn my new / fused "me" and how I operate on a baseline, thats an entirely different thing than trying to balance all the differing and contrasting parts or trying to understand and negotiate that because like... They are all simultaneously me and I VERY freely and fluidly exist as and between all of them. There isn't really "compromise" I have to make because.... we just co-exist harmoniously as one without even needing to explicitly talk about it or discuss or put intention into coming to a shared understanding, we just... do and know and its really really really really fucking easy living as a fused whole compared to being multiple parts

Like even if you were to ask me just as ONE part versus how I am now, there is not a single part in our system that has ever actually been so comfortable and so not-fatigued existing as I am as a whole

Everythings a lot more balanced, managable and our window of tolerance is STUPID fucking large - and I don't mean that in a "relative to where we used to be" or "relative to someone with as much trauma as I do" but genuinely STUPIDLY huge compared to most generally neurotypical non-traumatized not-severely-mentally ill people and I largely thank that to Post Traumatic Growth honestly.

But like... tldr, not really at all for me surprisingly. Maybe really early post fusion when I was still figuring myself out a lot but like.... Thats more so the process of fusing than being fused itself imo.

(Side note edit: Sometimes I DO think itd be better to explore a situation and issue as independent parts and so sometimes I DO operate in a more system / plural way of existing for however long its beneficial, but thats less to do with fusion not helping me as much as it is that I think a plural lens and perspective has a lot of perks in navigating complicated situations.)

Anyways tagging a few others who might have a different answer / perspective on this since they are either in a different stage of a fusion / integration and/or have a different way of existing with their fused / integrated state than me.

@hiiragi7 @reimeichan @subsystems

[eamour]

all about techniques.

there are so so many techniques and methods that people have come up with to make manifesting easier and more entertaining. so, let’s talk about the most important points when practicing those techniques!

manifestation techniques.

a technique in terms of manifesting is a method to make you experience the satisfaction of your desire within your imagination. it does not only make manifesting easier and more enjoyable for you but it also helps you to shift your concept of self. you can use any technique to help you embody or identify with your desire.

techniques don’t manifest.

the problem with techniques in manifestation (such as visualisation, affirmations, sats, the "i am/void"-state) is that people tend to assign power to these techniques — more power than to themselves.

again, a method is supposed to HELP and ASSIST you. it’s not doing any of the creating-your-reality work, unlike you. YOU are indeed manifesting things into your reality, with or without a technique. remember. you are manifesting at all times, you are occupying all sorts of states throughout the day, making your current state of consciousness manifest. are you scripting for each state which you NATURALLY shift to? no matter what technique you do, its only purpose is to help you create experiences you would like to have mentally. that’s where all manifestations take place first — in the MIND. not because you have written it down on paper.

all techniques are equal.

when i say "equal", i'm not saying that each technique is the same in terms of what you're doing and how you're doing it. no, all techniques are equal because they all FUNCTION equally and guarantee the same results. no technique works better than the other. no technique is either superior, or inferior.

here's the thing: the reason why people say "this technique works so much better and faster for me!" is because they favour it. they enjoy doing it. doing the technique feels natural to them and doesn’t require a lot of effort. it’s not something that they have to bring themselves to do with force — they LIKE doing it. that’s because we are all different. i know people who could write a fucking novel with the scripts they have in mind. then i know people who love to affirm whenever they can because they think it’s convenient for them to do. and then there is me who loves to listen to music and visualise my desired scenes. what we have in common is that we do all these techniques because they suit us and we can choose to try any other technique whenever we want. we aren’t tied to one technique only. sometimes i end up writing a whole list of things that i want to have, accept it as mine, and go on with my day. works JUST as well as visualising.

please, do not …

... force it · for example, the scenes you could visualise when trying to fulfill yourself or let yourself experience a scenario you desire should come to you naturally. the affirmation you would like to use should feel natural to you. a technique is always something you choose to do voluntarily. it isn’t a rule you need to follow. you're not obligated to do this exact technique for this long and that many days, and so on.

... perfect it · when you do a technique, it’s not your goal to do it as perfect and as accurate as possible. you don’t have to visualise a picture perfect scene, nor will you fail to manifest if you miss to affirm the rest of your affirmations-list. you can forget details when scripting, be as detailed or vague in your visual scenes, or only affirm one single affirmation — that’s perfectly fine! your perfect scene in imagination or your affirmations aren’t what makes it perfect in the physical world, it’s the FEELING you get from it. if you can perfectly FULFILL yourself, then it will be perfectly reflected back to you in its physical form. inner acceptance is what creates fulfillment, not the perfection of a technique.

... complicate it · a technique cannot put you into a spiral and make you question your whole reality just because you think you haven’t done it "correctly". there is no right way to do a technique and no fixed way to practice it. do whatever you like and however you like it!

... follow others · now, you can definitely try a technique that seems interesting to you, that has been introduced to you by others or that you think will be enjoyable. nevertheless, a technique that feels normal and natural to others doesn’t have to feel normal and natural to you. don’t commit to doing something because you think or you've been told that this is the technique you need to do in order to manifest your desire.

no have to's, only want to's.

the premise of each and every technique is that you WANT to do it. there is no forcing, no pushing, no "need to" or "have to". it’s personal, it’s something YOU like doing, not what the bigger collective seems to be practicing. this is what i always remind myself of when practicing anything loa related: you cannot commit to something you dont love, you’ll cheat. meaning, you won’t be able to do a technique properly (as in, having and being), therefore won’t change self and remain the exact same.

if you like visualising, do it! if you like affirming all the time, do it! if you like counting your affirmations, do it! if you like scripting, do it! if you do the lullaby method before going to bed, do it! if you like rampaging after you wake up, do it! again, you are the creator and you choose which technique(s) suits you the best.

what to do.

when manifesting with the help of a technique, focus on inner acceptance. accept your desire as factual. make it a present, undeniable fact. because accepting your desire to be true means to identify with it in imagination, therefore you BE or HAVE it. that’s your goal, that’s your priority.

with love, ella.

[dustymeadows]

I should smooth out what the situation is between nightmare and his men

I don’t quite think its anything abusive, but you can’t put 4 mentally ill men in the same building and expect good situations to come from it you know. So its not exactly all needs are perfectly met either

This is all coloured by my personal idea Nightmare would not replace his men- its just generally inefficient and troublesome and honestly emotionally taxing. And terrible for loyalty. Nightmare went through so much shit himself feeling like second-best, expendable, like nobody would blink an eye if he was gone, and as much as he’d want to position himself like the people that hurt him in order to feel powerful I think the moment he felt like his brother (or how he believed his brother thought of him) he’d recoil like touching a hot stove.

Anyway my order of joining I think would be Killer, Dust, Horror, Cross (if applicable)

I like Killer being first because it means all of the shit NM had to figure out? He had to do with Killer. Creates a really complicated relationship thats closer than Nightmare’d like to admit. Killer’d get to see Nightmare go from someone floundering trying to pretend he knows how mortals work to sssort of having it more together by the time Dust is picked up. Killer doesn’t have a positive opinion of Nightmare but he still likes NM yknow? Out of everyone, Killer sees Nightmare the most falliable. The most “human”. Just as prone to faults in judgement as everyone else. Killer trusts Nightmare only as much as Nightmare will trust Killer. Which puts them into fun seesaws

Dust doesnt really give a shit? Dust is always kinda in his own world until things settle down more. Dislikes Nightmare but its as much as Dust dislikes everyone so. Has the most trouble adjusting to things but I also think him and Nightmares arrangement definitely involves NM telling him if the player returns to his world? So it lets Dust kinda start to explore his new… everything, without as MUCH of that constant weight. Which eventually becomes a general trust of nightmare even if it never grows past neutrality

Horror… horror is. Interesting. The first hurdle you have to jump is how the hell you convinced him to join NMs gang but that could be a whole other post. So putting a pin in that, Horror seemed like he adjusted the quickest but definitely was just putting up a front until everything eventually cracked and he had worlds worst crash-out. Horrors trust in nightmare (and dust and killer) was built by how that situation was handled- not that it was done perfectly but the fact Nightmare gave him proper space and accommodation without trying to force anything definitely. Like. Like in the moment it worsened the paranoia but in the long-run it made Horror feel way more secure in his place. He’s not too personally close with Nightmare but he has a pretty positive opinion despite it

Obviously theres a lot of rough edges but i think its important that Overall theres a level of security. Because it helps tie them together and give them an actual motivation to stick around if shit gets rough. If nightmare ever spiraled or seemed to make stupid decisions the three wouldn’t blindly follow, they’d turn around and try to figure out what was fucking him up. Because even if Nightmare believes its fear or deals that keeps them in line, its the security of the situation and the fact that Nightmare listens to them and values their perceptions of reality.