#it's the second quarter life crisis yall

[dearkyeom]

caratblr my safe space fr i feel so OLD in other platforms and fandoms

[ppangjae]

SUMMER’S INTERLUDE 02

LET ME KNOW - series masterlist

previous -> summer’s interlude 02 -> next

If there’s anything Jaehyun’s been sure of, it’s his feelings for you. But there’s always one thing that holds him back. Why can’t he tell you?

When a man and a woman become best friends, one is bound to fall for the other. In this case, it’s him.

“I think there’s something you should know, Jaehyun.”

Jaehyun quirks an eyebrow at Johnny. His friend turns on the engine of his car and locks the doors. Jaehyun could only stare at him confusedly.

“You’re not going home yet.” Johnny commands as he drives through the neighborhood. “We need to have a talk.”

The ride is quiet. Jaehyun looks out the window. It’s a beautiful morning. The skies are bright. The sun feels warm against his skin. Johnny pulls up at a familiar place that holds many memories. It’s the neighbourhood soccer field. It’s the usual place where the three of you meet up to star-gaze.

“What’s up with you, lately?”

Jaehyun glances at him. “Me?”

Johnny glares at him. “Who else do you think I’m asking?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs his shoulders.

“First, you ask me to go get some drinks with you. Then, you get shit-faced drunk.” Johnny says. “Now, you’re acting petty. For what? Did something happen?”

“She happened,” Jaehyun mumbles. His voice is so soft and quiet and Johnny barely picks it up.

“I’m slowly starting to think it’s because of Y/N. Ever since a guy started liking her, ever since it made her happy, you’ve been acting the complete opposite.”

Jaehyun sighs. “Remember when I complained about my quarter-love life crisis?”

“Yes, and what about it?”

“Y/N and I cheered each other on about finding the one. But,” Jaehyun gulps nervously. “But ever since Jooyoung tried to pursue her, I didn’t like the idea.”

“Didn’t like the idea of what?”

“That she’s potentially going to be with him. That I’m going to try and cheer her on but knowing deep down that it’s far from being sincere.” Jaehyun explains.

Johnny holds in a breath. Johnny knows how you feel for Jaehyun. He didn’t need you to tell him because he could see it. He could see how much you love Jaehyun. But he never thought he’d see the day where Jaehyun would finally notice it. And now that it’s happening right in front of him, he’s not sure how to approach it.

“Well,” Johnny hesitates. “Why do you think you feel that way?”

“Johnny, I don’t think I could stand seeing her with someone else. But at the same time, I’m pushing her away because I don’t want to ruin or stop her from being happy.” Jaehyun replies.

“What if stopping her will make her happy?”

Jaehyun looks at his best friend. “What do you mean?”

“You’ve always thought that stopping her from being happy would be stopping her from being with someone that’s not you.” Johnny explains. “But have you thought of another possibility? The possibility that stopping her from being with someone else and being with you instead would make her happy?”

Jaehyun chuckles breathlessly. “Do you think she would be happy with someone like me? Her best friend? Her best friend that unfortunately has feelings for her?”

“She’s been with you for most of her life, as your best friend. What does being with you as a lover make it any more different?”

“I can’t. I can’t risk our friendship.” Jaehyun shakes his head. “I’d rather have her as my best friend if telling her how I feel about her would make me lose her forever.”

Johnny smiles while shaking his head. “Y/N isn’t like that. You’ll never lose her over something like that.”

“How could you say that?” He asks.

“I say this because I see it. I see how special you are to her. She looks at you like you’re her whole entire universe. She looks at you like with one wrong move, you’ll be gone forever.”

author’s note. yall it’s almost done. we’ve passed the second interlude and there’s only a couple chapters left. i can’t omg i never thought it’d be done so fast. i hope you liked it!

[dcehvi-blog]

using this gif because jung hae-in is a MEAL because he cute okay? but yes HELLO this is su, back with her second character, song daehwi, 29 year old ex-mayor’s son and a politician himself!!! he also owns and runs a (not very elite)  luxury club. i’ll be developing him for a while as i take a short break from all the darkness that seojoon brings (i love him tho). you can reach me on im or on discord!!! or alternatively, feel free to like this and i'll reach out to you! I’ll be a lil slow in replying but I promise I”ll definitely get back to you <3

so here’s a lil rundown: 

so he was born literally with a silver spoon!!! he’s the oldest of three siblings and always had immense pressure put on him since birth. that’s not to say his life is DIFFICULT because boi is literally rolling in money BUT he’s always had to be perfect and polished and pristine (we are pristin ANNYEONG)

his siblings have it a little ~easier~ because daehwi was the only one to really grow up in the spotlight - his father became the seoul mayor just as he turned sixteen, so he’s grown up quite fast rly 

so he’s a great smoothtalker and can probably charm the pants off you - except he isn’t into that so he’ll probably just take your vote

right so he’s a politician!!! he’s working for the seoul mayor’s office and helped in the campaigning efforts of the current mayor. he’s currently in charge of gangnam-gu, naturally. 

it’s only when he turned 25 that he realised he doesn’t have a personality. well, at least not a personality HE created. he’s been stuck with a PR personality for so long that he’s not really sure who he is

call it a quarter life crisis

the luxury club is his idea of rebelling but it’s also his way to get more power. he knows he can’t win over people with empty promises and cheshire grins, so he’s created a fucking luxurious club which welcomes almost everyone 

the place is called chasms 

he basically hand picked everyone to be hired in that place!!! he’s a “good” owner in the sense that he seems to be v involved and caring but he just knows how to keep eveyrone’s mouth shuts

so that’s why his label is j a n u s -> he’s actually v manipulative when he wants to be and switches so easily between personalities that those who don’t know him well often get a whiplash

personality }}

he is EXTREMELY two-sided but he often doesn’t show both sides to the same person

he’s mostly good natured (in front of people) but a little insincere because most of the time he seems so put together? but he’s not above threats if he has to get his way to make sure nothing’s afoot in gangnam. it’s his job after all. 

trigger warning: violence // he’s been known to get his way, even if it’s through spilling blood of threatening someone with good old life or death threats. he’s never carried the latter option out but you know, if he needs to, he would. 

trigger warning: mild drug addiction // he has a case of adderall addiction which is... I would say quite severe? it doesn’t harm him (yet) but he just needs it to keep him going. he justifies it to himself by saying that o well at least it’s not hard drugs

which explains why he tends to be REALLY fidgety when he hasn’t had his dose

extremely efficient and generally hates anyone who slacks off? coming from quite an elitist background, he wrongfully believes that hard work should be able to solve ANYTHING.

enjoys dancing if coaxed onto the dancefloor!!!! he hardly ever a) lets his guard down and b) gets drunk, so good luck with that

his asexuality is both a huge and minor part of him - he’s comfortable with kissing (sometimes) and he doesn’t quite mind giving hickeys really (but not receiving them) but nothing below the belt thank you very much. It’s just been a part of him which he’s been quite open about

that does NOT mean he is not romantic. even he’s panromantic - he genuinely isn’t concerned with the gender of the person he’s romantically invested in. in his line of work, romance is a little hard to come by. 

stickler for cleanliness!!!!! pls don’t put him in direct line of sight of huge messes, it makes him uncomfortable!!!!!!!!!!!!

plots }}

yo we could go 7000 ways w this boy tbh

all right first off his family/friends -> he’s rich as hell, so he’d probably go around quite a bit in the elite circles? he also has two younger siblings!!! who I don’t have specified story lines for except for what was stated above

partner/best friend-> he’s a bit of a workaholic so his (platonic) partner/best friend is someone who works with him or someone who works for him 

staff -> in any form! he probably has the regular secretary, driver etc or even someone who manages his meetings for him? 

and then the other staff -> anyone who works at chasms! escort, management, bartender, security, dancers, hell even the one or two peddlers!!!! anything is possible!!!!!

then there’s the third form of staff -> the ones who do the dirty work for him, the ones who are all muscle and brawn and perpetually by his side 24/7. bodyguards/possible hitmen??? options are ENDLESS weeooo

he’s in office on tuesdays, thursdays and fridays! come talk to him, if you have an issue. he’s usually the poster boy of good decorum in daylight hours! 

a mandatory ex who we can talk through the story line with! daehwi would have met them when he was 18-20? but things didn’t work out (maybe) because of his huge personality shifts

honestly i love plotting!!!! i love hearing about your characters and all the cool things yall are doing with them so please! don’t hesitate to hmu! <3

[dunkalfredo]

1575 words of gay and also hair? ft. amy

yo yo yo what up im back and im here to bring u that sweet sweet infidget

disclaimer: in case the title implies otherwise lemme just say that amy is gay too shes just not the main focus of this story. trust me, shes v gay and i love her. shes a good gorl. bless her soul

other disclaimer: infinite’s not-infinite name is finn bc infinite is Not his real name i stg

other other disclaimer: this is old friends au/fixed canon. follows the canon @theashemarie and i are establishing over here in our lil gay corner

u kno the drill yall click Keep reading to read the things

It’s a simple difference, so small that Gadget doesn’t notice it at first.

Finn’s there, at the breakfast nook, reading the newspaper, and when Gadget walks in (always the last to wake up, today’s no exception) he makes it all the way to the fridge before his eye spots the change in shape, the abnormal smallness of the silhouette in his peripheral.

He turns, slowly, as though he’ll disturb the air if he moves too fast, and says, perplexed, “Did you cut your hair?”

(Gadget really looks at Finn for the first time, and his brain confirms what his eyes whispered to him mere moments ago; short, white locks tickle Finn’s neck, replacing the usual mane of white down his back.)

Finn looks up from his periodical, makes eye contact, and shrugs. “Needed a change. Do you like it?”

Gadget’s still several paces behind where he needs to be, not yet at ‘Do you like it?’ and still at it wasn’t short last night.

Finn’s not exactly a master hairdresser. Gadget eyes the thin locks, the jagged ends, the slight shake in Finn’s hands as he watches Gadget watch him; it all screams impulse, midnight and afraid, chop it off, feel better now but horrified in the morning, all too aware that it’s too late to take it back. Gadget sees it in his eyes, the need for reassurance, validation.

Gadget sighs, a small depression of his chest, and smiles. “Yeah, it’s nice.”

It’s not so much that Finn smiles, or speaks, but his carriage lifts ever so slightly, and the newspaper stops shaking.

-

(Gadget also sees, for the first time, the dark circles under Finn’s eyes, and his mind wanders.

Finn, three a.m., sheets tossed by nightmares and bed absent one, stumbling to the bathroom and staring himself in the mirror with wild, cold eyes. He doesn’t recognize the face in the mirror. He can’t feel his own hands. The world is little too dark, too foggy, obscured by nightfall and burnt lightbulbs, and the space feels liminal, unreal.

Finn runs the tap, listens to the whine of the faucet, lets it ring in his ears as he splashes his face with cold water, and the hair on his head hangs limp over his neck, pouring over his shoulders, a cascade of white. He forgot to put it up last night.

It’s this simple fact that occupies his mind, drags his hands into the drawers for a hair tie, but instead his fingers brush against something hard, sharp. Scissors.

Gadget’s mind stops there, not willing to breathe life into the image of Finn, breath heavy, eyes watering, hands trembling, sweeping hair into the garbage and carefully climbing back into bed limb by limb like he’ll break if he bends too far.)

-

It’s later, when the day is over, and they’re home, sprawled out over the couch and recharging after errands and separate schedules and distance that Finn finally says it aloud, despite its sitting heavy in the air since that morning and never leaving:

“I need help.”

Gadget, head in his lap and eyes on the television, doesn’t look up, doesn’t even bother raising his head to speak and instead mumbles his words into Finn’s knee. “Astute observation, Einstein. How did you ever come to that conclusion?”

Finn huffs. “I’m serious.”

“I know you are.” Now Gadget rolls over to look up, frowning when he sees the disconcerted expression drawing Finn’s brows together. “You haven’t cut your hair since third grade.”

Gadget sees the cogs turn in his head, and then finally Finn says, barely a whisper, “Third grade?”

“Yeah.”

Finn deflates, sinks back into the couch, and then sinks further with a sigh that flattens his lungs. “I really need help.”

-

At first, they dismiss therapy outright, because they don’t think a psychologist will hear “I killed thousands of people because I got kidnapped by a mad scientist and forcibly possessed by a rock” and not immediately send Finn to the psyche ward (or, alternatively, a prison cell, since Finn’s still technically a wanted criminal. Only technically). It’s only after another night of deliberation and (for Finn) staring, sleepless, at a wall that they decide that they need someone to talk to.

(When Gadget mentions this to Sonic while they’re out doing “cleanup” (getting rid of debris in X city or Y town because Knuckles is occupied), almost shouting to project his voice over the creak of the pipe they’re lifting from the sidewalk, he’s not expecting the immediate response Sonic shoots back.

“Talk to Amy,” says Sonic, casually, dusting off his hands and reaching for a chunk of… building? Sidewalk? Gadget can’t tell. Concrete something. They’re both going to have to lift that one. “She’s great with emotions and stuff.”

“But Amy hates Finn!” Gadget cries. “Why would she be his therapist?”

“Well, she likes you,” Sonic says. “Maybe that’ll help?”)

When Gadget relays this suggestion to Finn, he’s just as appalled. “Talk to who?”

“Amy,” Gadget says, hands worrying over each other and eyes somewhere to the right of Finn’s face.

Finn deadpans, “She hates me,” and Gadget thinks it’s like poetry, how his conversations seem to rhyme.

He sighs. “I’m aware.”

-

The moment they show up on Amy’s doorstep, and she opens the door, eyeing Finn like he’s a block of rotten cheese she just found in her fridge, Gadget’s one-hundred percent convinced that this isn’t going to work.

This feeling continues as she ushers them (Gadget) inside and offers them (Gadget) some tea, to which Gadget politely refuses and Finn stays silent. She brings out three cups of chamomile anyways (Finn’s was likely an afterthought, but Gadget considers it progress), and they’re seated in her living room, Finn’s hand in Gadget’s, Amy in the seat opposite, when she starts speaking in earnest. It’s not what Gadget expects at all.

A simple question, four words, and the most perplexed voice Gadget’s ever heard from Amy; “You cut your hair?”

It’s an unexpected question followed by an equally unexpected answer: “Midnight crisis,” Finn says, and it’s with a voice that’s not nearly as small as it was hours ago, when they were both leaving the apartment and Gadget asked if he had his wallet. That was the quiet “Yes” of a man half his size and age; this is his normal, low timbre, conversational, like Amy wasn’t glaring daggers at him mere seconds ago.

Amy’s posture shifts, and while the air’s still unnaturally cold, her face opens up just a little more. “That’s why you’re here.”

“Yeah,” Finn says, frank.

She hums, and Gadget’s nerves spike.

-

It’s an hour later, and Gadget’s walking back to the metro station with Finn to head home when he hears him say, “That wasn’t too bad.”

Gadget reminds Finn, pointedly, “Half of our visit was awkward silence.”

“She only glared for a quarter of it.”

-

Later, Gadget thinks, watching Finn fiddle and hum and haw under Amy’s stripping, burning, disarming, demanding gaze for the third time in a month, that there’s something missing. He sees Finn’s thumbs, his fingers, restless, twitching and turning in his lap, and Gadget’s struck, hard, with this feeling, a wave washing over him that this isn’t right. Gadget knows what’s missing, he’s sure of it, but it’s just out of reach, a breath too far from his grabbing, clutching hands.

Then, as they walk home from Amy’s that day, he sees it, in the corner of his eye; Finn, right hand in the motion of grabbing for his shoulder, where for years a white lock would spill over and he could grab, run it between his fingers, fiddle and twist.

A memory surfaces: The two of them, younger, late high school, Gadget slipping out of the house at one in the morning because if he stays inside, where the death and cold and emptiness his father left behind aches the hardest, he might punch the walls in two, every single one, and then break and bend and snap over the rubble right after, a broken body to match the broken home it came from. He leaves, he sneaks over, desert night lukewarm and clammy against the back of his neck, and he arrives at the gaping maw of his best friend’s front door, where the hinges creak and the door opens as soon as Gadget’s foot meets the doormat.

It’s a comforting memory; Finn, shoulders tired and slumped but eyes and arms warm, curling around Gadget, letting him step into his space and his embrace, there, in the doorway, and both taking a moment to pause and breathe. It’s this lull, this potential energy building between them before moving again, that does Gadget in. His chest breaks open and a single, harrowed sob, more a hiccup and an exhale than a cry, spills out, but its muffled by Finn’s chest, contained, away from the prying eyes of others and kept just for them. In this stillness, Gadgets cards his fingers through the hair on Finn’s back, focusing on the softness of the locks instead of ache of a late father, and the digits begin looping the tufts into loose braids.

Gadget thinks of this moment, sees this in his mind’s eye as he watches Finn try and register why there’s nothing there, why his fingers feel nothing, and Gadget wonders how much they really lost that night, weeks ago, besides sleep and besides hair.