#jung jaehyun blurbs

[thewonandonly]

LONGING FOR YOU

PLAYLIST : spotify

PAIRING : pro-baseball player!jaehyun x fem!college student!reader

GENRE : fluff, smut

PROMPT : "if you were my little girl, i'd do whatever i could do, i'd run away and hide with you." au

WC : 15,323 words

WARNINGS : strong language, sports medicine student!reader, reader used to play volleyball, teeny tiny age gap (reader is early 20's, jaehyun is irl age), greek life, jaehyun is implied to be a (former) frat brother (never officially states it), frat party, drinking/alcohol, there is a mention of puke/vomit, mention of overstimulating setting, cameo by yeri :3, mark, and johnny, consent is sexy, protection is hot, lots and lots of praise, BRIEF locker room sexual tension bc i had to, ig it can be considered a kind of sugar daddy au?, jaehyun has no rizz 🗣️, penetration (f), oral (m + f),

AUTHOR'S NOTE : jaehyun military enlistment 😞 jerma helped me write this thats why it took so long. forgive me for the horrendous explicit scene i quite literally have not written full length smut in so long. and also, jaehyun jaehyun jaehyun jaehyun jaehyun jaehyun. :3 that's all.

DISCLAIMER : the characters in this story are to be allusions to real people, and none of the situations, personalities, and actions found here should reflect reality. this story was created with zero intention to violate the images of the artists.

"Come on, come to the party with me!" Yeri groaned, tugging on your arm as if you were her mother and she was your child begging for a toy.

You sighed, rubbing your temples, "I would love to, but I've got work I've gotta do." It was the seventh time — yes, all in one day — where Yeri has asked you to join her at this giant frat party that her friend, Johnny, who happened to be the RA where said party was being held, invited her to. She would've loved to go by herself, but she planned to consume insane amounts of alcohol and would require someone with wonderful bedside manner, i.e. you. 

Yeri groaned, throwing her head back dramatically, "All you do is do your homework." She complained, "I'm sure the wonderful science behind athletic medicine can wait for one night off."

"I'm sorry, Yeri, but my entire scholarship is riding on this." You mumbled, watching Yeri groaned louder, as her head moved forward, trudging her way out your bedroom doorway.

You would be ecstatic to go to some lame party down University Road. You'd love to get drunk, hook up with some dude who is looking to hit. You'd love to take a break, but, unfortunately, your life after you graduate was already starting. You had 29 thousand dollars and two internships invested in your future. If you wanted to be an accredited professional in athletic medicine, you'd have to focus, and not get distracted or discouraged. 

But, then again, you're still young. You're only getting closer to the end, and Yeri is busy with her cheerleading career. You'd rather not lose this connection. Glancing at the clock, you noticed as the second hand tick away, sighing softly. It was thirty to 12. The night was still young.

You turned in your chair, calling to her, a small laugh escaping your lips as she looked at you with eyes that looked as if she was a kicked puppy, "I'll go."

Her face immediately lit up and she smiled, "You will?"

You held up your hands in surrender, standing from your cluttered desk, "You're right, as much as I hate to admit it. The world of medicine can wait."

"I'm so happy right now." She cheered happily, "Okay, I'll let you get ready. I'll take a quick shower and everything." She turned the corner into the hallway and you heard the shower run.

Sighing, you opened your closet door and analyzed the clothes on the hangers. You didn't have any "sexy" outfits, so to speak. Everything was strictly professional clothing, especially considering you had your internships around the corner. But, who could show up to a frat party in high rise, flared dress pants? Maybe it was time to break out the clothes you packed right out of high school. 

Once you tore through the boxes, pulled on the clothes, you could swear they grew tighter, which was normal; you were still growing, in more areas than one. You opted for sticking to the items you chose, for the most risqué look, considering it was a frat party.

Yeri was quick to get in and out of the shower, quick to get her makeup done, and quick to get dressed. You're sure she was going to be quick to get out the door as well.

You leaned against the wall to pull on your shoes, watching Yeri immediately grow frazzled as she struggled to find her keys, which were normally in the catch bowl, but was strategically hug up on the key hook earlier for convenience. 

The trip to the Pi Phi house wasn't far, but the blistering cold wind bit at your nose and cheeks as you and Yeri both walked down the road from your apartment to the frat house.

You both turned the corner, your jaws opening in shock. 

The Pi Phi house was huge, damn near 3 floors. And much to your dismay, it wasn't a new brother of the house at the door, it was two sisters from the Kappa Omega Pi sorority. They seemed nice, letting in quite a few people, until they turned away another girl. 

You looked to Yeri, sighing softly, "I don't think we're gonna get in." The small queue was moving quickly.

Yeri rolled her eyes so far back you were sure they'd get stuck, "Relax. If they don't let us in, I've got an in." She rubbed her hands together, the cold chill in the air slowly building, "God, fuck! It's fucking cold."

"Just don't think about it. We're almost to the front." You mumbled, stepping forward up onto the porch, watching the girl's faces drop at the sight of you after letting two guys inside.

They gave the two of you a once over, exhaling a deep breath through their nose, "It's six bucks to get in."

Yeri pulled out her phone, scoffing, "That's not what it says on the flyer." She turned her phone to the girls, giving a smartalick smirk, "And, besides, I know Johnny." 

The girls looked at each other, chuckling, "You know Johnny?"

Yeri crossed her arms, motioning to the open front door of the frat house, "Go on. Go get him."

One of the girls stepped inside, and walked out in seconds, a tall male peeking his head out, pulling a face at the girl, "Come on, you're really asking if Yeri can come in?" He nodded his head to the two of you. 

Yeri smiled at the girls, waving to them before turning to you and speaking over the music that grew significantly louder as you walked through the crowded hallways, "Those girls were definitely not girls girls."

"Aren't the Kappa Omega Pi sisters like really tightknit with Pi Phi?" You responded, watching your temporary escort split off from the two of you.

"Yeah," Yeri sighed, "Let's not worry about them, though! Let's just have fun!" She immediately turned a corner and you found yourself by your lonesome, squeezing past people with small whispers of "Excuse me's" and "Sorry's" before you finally made your way into the kitchen where it wasn't as crowded, but was definitely still filled with a few people. Pi Phi brothers and Kappa Omega Pi sisters were lined up along a wall where they took pictures together to show their love for their greek life. Your hand moved to grab at a bottle of Michelob Ultra, pouring it into the cup while you stared at the group taking photos. Maybe a social outing wasn't the best idea, considering the setting. You weren't much of a—

"Hey." Someone reached over and set the glass bottle down on the counter, laughing softly, "Your cup." 

You tore your eyes away from where you were staring, glancing down at the cup filled with foam from the beer, "Oh." You mumbled softly, glancing up at the person who was kind enough to take the empty bottle from your hand, "Thanks."

You watched him dump out the foamy beer into the sink, grabbing another plastic cup and beer, slowly pouring it out in front of you, "Here." 

"Thanks." You mumbled out again, grabbing the cup from his outstretched hand. It was dim in the kitchen, much to your dismay, only a string of Christmas lights you weren't sure the brothers ever took down from the passing holiday. You squinted your eyes to try to get a glimpse at who this person was for pouring your drink out. "I recognize you from somewhere."

"Damn, dude, what's taking so long?" A voice spoke over your own, at a much louder octave. He patted the guy on his shoulder, "Gotta celebrate your big game tomorrow."

Your brows pinched together as you assessed the voice, "Mark?" You questioned, your eyes squinting more, almost blinded by your lashes.

The shorter male turned to look at you, "Woah, Y/N, bro, I didn't even know you were here!" He smiled, laughing out loud, "What's up?" He asked.

"You're Pi Phi?" You asked him, waving awkwardly at him, "I didn't know you were part of the greek life."

"I didn't know you were either." Mark laughed again, "Bro, that's crazy. I didn't know you were in a sorority."

The unknown man turned to pour out some drinks, Mark's hand holding onto his shoulder for balance as people shoved their way through. 

"Oh, I'm not." You shook your head, taking a sip of the beer poured into the cup, "Yeri was able to get us in."

"Yeri's here?" Mark began to whip his head around, looking for the mentioned lady, "Dude, I didn't know she'd be here." His hand began to slap at the other's shoulder.

"Guess it's time you get over your fear." The other called to Mark, who grabbed three of the cups in his hand.

"Oh, I completely forgot." He motioned between the three of them, "Uh, Jaehyun, this is Y/N, she's in my athletic science class. The one I was telling you about!" 

The man, now named Jaehyun, waved his free hand at you, "Nice to meet you."

"Man, Y/N's, like, the smartest girl in the class! She knows a lot about that stuff." Mark nudged him, "Maybe once she completes her residency, she can be your primary physician." He teased.

"You play sports?" You questioned, taking another sip of the beer from the cup, "What do you play?"

"Baseball. Nothing too exciting."

"Does he play sports? He's in the ML." Mark seemed more excited about it than Jaehyun was, your smile growing as you saw Jaehyun roll his eyes. "ML means major league." 

"I know what it means, Mark." You laughed, "But, hey, congratulations! It must be nice." You smiled to Jaehyun, "Have you always wanted to play major league?"

Jaehyun shrugged, "Got scouted in high school. Johnny was the one who convinced me to accept it."

Mark laughed, "Well, hey, Y/N, it's nice to see you. If you want, we're gonna be at the couch with everyone." He used his elbow to motion over to the center of the house, "No pressure!"

You nodded, "Yeah, sure. I can help you carry some of the cups." You grabbed two of the cups from the counter in one hand, following the two of them back over to the couch where Johnny, Yeri, and other attendees sat, including the girls from the front door. You squatted slightly to place the cups down on the coffee table, wincing softly as you felt your knee creak.

"You okay?" Jaehyun, who wandered behind you to sit down, asked, his hand lingering on your back as you stumbled.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine." You laughed awkwardly, sitting down on the couch, "Old injury." You waved it off, taking another drink of your beer.

Mark found a spot next to Yeri, smiling softly as he greeted her and began conversating with her. You glanced at the two, chuckling softly as you watched Mark's cheeks turn pink.

You heard a jumble of words from Jaehyun, turning your head back to him, "What was that?" You leaned closer to him to hear him over the music playing over the subwoofer speakers.

"What from, if you don't mind me asking?" He repeated into your ear, his breath gently fanning across your cheek.

"I used to play volleyball." You shrugged, "Liberio, so, I normally fell on my knees." Your hand found it's way to the cap of your knee, rubbing it with your hand.

"Used to?"

"Yeah. I stopped playing after the injury." You laughed, nodding your head, "But, my doctor was really sweet. She actually helped me to study up until the entrance exam." 

Jaehyun nodded his head, "Well, I know myself and other athletes will be happy for your help." 

You smiled, laughing softly, "I hope." You turned slightly to look at him as he sat back against the couch, his arm resting over the back, "Do you like the major leauge?" Setting down your cup, you looked at him.

Jaehyun shrugged, "It's nice. I've been on a training regimen since I started. I mostly joined just cause I love baseball, though." He smiled, the cup resting in his hand on top of his thigh, "But, I mean, the coach and my teammates are pretty cool. And the pay isn't bad."

"I bet." You chuckled softly, "At least you get to do what you love." You smiled at him.

"How do you-"

"When are you-"

You both spoke over one another, both of you laughing.

Jaehyun motioned to you, "You go first." He reached his hand up to lean his head against it, looking at you.

"I was just gonna ask how you know Johnny and Mark." You shook your head, "I know you said that Johnny encouraged you to accept the scouting offer in high school. But, how'd you meet Mark?"

Jaehyun laughed, his hand reaching up to rub his temples, "Well, it's a pretty funny story." He started, glancing at Mark, who continued to talk Yeri's ear off, "He kinda joined the frat after finding out I was apart of it. I was only apart of it for a month, but, you know, sometimes people just get close."

"Well, if I do say so myself, it seems Mark is ecstatic that he knows you personally." You nodded to Jaehyun.

"I'm glad."

Yeri turned to you quickly, tapping your shoulder, "Hey, Y/N." She called to you, pulling your sight away from Jaehyun to look at her, "Wanna dance?"

You glanced at Jaehyun, and back at her, your mouth open and shutting like a golfish, "I-I really shouldn't... My knee."

Yeri groaned, "Come on! I love this song." She pouted, rubbing her hands together as she silently pleaded.

It was true, she did love this song. God, the amount of times she'd play this song in the car would make you nauseous. And you didn't have much of a choice when she pulled you up from where you were sitting to drag you into the crowd of people dancing to the music.

"How are you and Mark?" You called into her ear, the two of you holding hands as you both lazily danced.

Yeri glanced back at Mark, who was happily comversating with Jaehyun and Johnny, giggling like a little kid before she turned to you, "He's so much fun to talk to." She smiled.

You smiled back, happy to see her happy. "I'm glad." You responded, "Plus, he really likes you. You know he can't hide his feelings well." You glanced back at the three, glancing at your feet as you caught Jaehyun's eye.

Your friend smirked, laughing softly, "Oh, I see what's going on." She nudged your shoulder, which you rubbed with your hand as you looked at her, "You've got the hots for number 16." Yeri teased.

"What?" Your voice came out slightly higher, considering the assumption, "No, no." You shook your head, "I just met him."

"Doesn't mean you can't find him hot." She nudged you again, "Johnny told me he was expecting him to come tonight." She pulled out her phone, opening the tab of her browser to show you the search. "Jung Jaehyun, major league pitcher." In the middle of the crowd, you glanced between the phone and the man who sat on the couch, "Number 16." Yeri's finger clicked on a photo of Jaehyun, the front of the jersey embroidered with big red letters that read, "Sentinels".

"Wow." It's all you could say. You knew Mark said he was in major league, but you didn't think that major. You were thinking maybe small hometown baseball that made it big. "He even has a trading card?"

Yeri nodded, locking her phone before putting it back in her pocket, "He's big." She nodded her head, "Professional Sentinels player, going on his fourth year with the team."

You were flabbergasted. No wonder Mark was so excited telling you.

Standing there, you thought for a second, "If he's so big, why isn't anyone freaking out about him being here?" You raised an eyebrow.

Yeri raised her own brow, "You'll be surprised how many athletics students don't watch athletics." She hummed, nodding her head at her own statement.

"Okay, well, now that you told me this, I'll just feel like a gold digger." You rubbed your neck shyly, completely unaware the end of the song just as another one kicked up.

"Shut up." She scrunched up her face again, grabbing your hand to lead you back to the couch where you both were previously sat, "You're fine. You're nothing like a gold digger."

"Welcome back!" Johnny called, motioning to the couch.

Yeri sat the both of you down, smiling at Mark as soon as she got comfortable, taking the cup from his hand to take a sip.

You sat down, Jaehyun to your right and Yeri to your left. 

Jaehyun's whole hand covered the top of the cup he held, slowly passing it to you, "I held onto your drink while you were gone." He smiled.

"Oh, thank you." You nodded to him, taking a small swig of the drink, glancing at him shyly.

He wore much more lax clothing; a black long sleeved shirt and black cargo pants, various rings along his fingers and a silver necklace with an charm you couldn't quite see as it was flipped over. You glanced away, watching Jaehyun smile softly as you took another sip.

"What?" You questioned, blushing softly as he continued to stare.

"Nothing. Nothing." He mumbled, "Just... don't drink too much." 

You smiled softly, setting the now empty cup down on the table, "Don't worry. I normally only have one drink and I'm done." You sat back on the couch, looking at him.

You both sat there for a second, not saying anything. Jaehyun would glance over the back of the couch every once in a while, meeting the hands of other members of Greek life, making small conversations with them, or even sharing a few laughs as they conversed. Sometimes Johnny or Mark would join in.

Slowly, you felt your social battery slowly drain, and you whispered to Yeri to share where you'd be going; outside, in the expansive, empty backyard of the frat house, away from the music, crowds and smell of alcohol in the air.

You sighed softly as you relaxed against a chair in the backyard, glancing down at your phone to slowly recharge your own battery.

Yet, it seemed like despite being away, your thoughts and fingers lingered back to Jaehyun, typing his name across the keyboard into the search bar.

There were articles about him, fan pages, compilation videos of some of his pitches and plays. Professional photos and fan captures. He really was larger than life. 

The baseball uniform he wore was clean and pristine aside from the red dirt across the left side of his body, and after much digging, you found out that after batting, he'd reach a base by sliding. 

You found yourself diving headfirst into doom scrolling about Jaehyun, his career, what people thought about him. His record with the team was clean, and his ability was impressive. He was often claimed as MVP of his team, giving them several wins in their games.

The sliding door opening was enough to have you scrambling to lock your phone and set it down in your lap. You glanced behind you, finding it was nothing more than another guest at the frat party, gagging as they turned the corner to spill their guts. 

You pulled a face, standing up to move back inside to the party, the sudden smell of puke and alcohol mixing making you feel sick, mixing together just as you opened the door to step back inside. 

You recharged your social battery just enough to continue talking before Yeri wanted to leave, yet it dropped right back down again as the smell settled around you. Did it always smell like sweat? Did the floor always feel sticky? Did the counters have all those cups on them? 

Everything felt so overwhelming.

"Hey, are you okay?" 

It's the second time that voice has asked you if you were feeling okay. You pull your eyes away from looking at the scene before you to look at Jaehyun, whose eyes were softened.

"I was just about to check on you." He mumbled.

"I'm okay." You took a deep breath in, slowly exhaling, "It's a little overwhelming in here." 

"Yeah." Jaehyun chuckled, letting him step behind you to slowly guide you away from the big group of people, "Here. This way you can get the best of both worlds." Jaehyun leaned beside you against the wall close to the front door, holding the brim of his plastic cup with his fingers, glancing around at the group as it only grew bigger.

"Thank you." You whispered, crossing your legs as you leaned against the wall, "Hey, so, I know Mark said you were in major league, and... Yeri kinda showed me the google search about you."

Jaehyun laughed softly, "Yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck, "Sentinels."

"Yeah." You nodded, looking at him, "Must be cool going places and getting recognized." 

He shrugged, "I mean, it's all the same. Often times people don't know it's me without a cap or a batting helmet." Jaehyun nodded, "It is pretty cool having a trading card, though." He smiled to you, turning to look at you.

"I saw that! Did you see how much someone's willing to pay for a signed one?" You chuckled.

"Yeah, I did." He laughed too, "Can't believe someone has that much money to spend on a piece of paper. Especially when I started not too long ago."

"Well, I mean, you do get that type of money." You nudged him, feeling your uneasiness quickly disappearing as you spoke to him.

Jaehyun shook his head, "Most of it goes to bills and taxes." A group of some Pi Pho frat brothers pushed by, forcing Jaehyun into you, his arm above your head to make sure he didn't crush you, "Jesus fu- Christ." He didn't finish the swear, glancing at you, "Are you okay?" He glanced at the people sprinting by, one slipping and dropping their cup of alcohol.

"I'm fine." You whispered, "Fine."

Jaehyun leaned his arm on the wall, right above your head. His face was close enough to see the details. He smelt good — like rose and ember; so much so that it was intoxicating. His dimples and his eyes as he smiled, the faint stubble along his chin and his upper lip. The necklace hanging from his neck, the emblem still flipped backwards; you were beginning to think he put it on backwards for it to face away from others. As you appreciated his features you realized that perhaps he was sculpted from marble by Michelangelo himself. 

The faint smell of alcohol from his red solo cup and a puddle of the spilled liquor from the brothers swirled around the both of you. The song changed beat and volume, glancing around the corner to find Johnny turning up the dial, the bass nearly blowing out your eardrums.

"Don't you have a game tomorrow?" You spoke into his ear over the music, feeling your heart flutter as he turned his head slightly so you didn't have to move much.

He chuckled, shrugging, "It's kinda tradition to visit before a game." He responded, his lips gently brushing against your cheek as he spoke.

You nodded as he moved back to his position, smiling at him, "So, do you always linger around the university or...?"

"No," He shook his head, and you can see the liquid courage glossing his eyes, "But, I mean, if I got to find someone as beautiful as you, maybe it's not a bad idea." Someone nudged behind him, causing him to straighten up with his chest hitting your own. He had you pressed flush against the wall, but he obviously wasn't focused on that as he glanced behind him, "A lot of energy for you students." He laughed as he looked back at you, "Must be nice to be young."

You laughed, smiling at him, "Aren't you only 27?"

"Well, yeah, but..." He playfully rolled his neck over his shoulders, "At some point in time, these old bones have to rest."

"And you decided to do that at an old frat house with a bunch of newly turned 21 year olds?"

He shrugged again, "Better than the old farts in the league." He glanced around the party, noticing multiple of the attendees either drinking to their restless end, making out with some of the bubbly blonde sorority sisters or passed out on the ground, table or couch. He noticed Mark talking up a storm with Yeri, and Johnny handing out more drinks to guests, "But, you're right. Wanna head out?"

"Yo-you wanna leave with me?" You stammered.

He laughed, "Yeah!" He smiled, his dimples making an appearance once more, "How rare is it that I meet a beautiful woman here among all these girls?"

You blushed at his compliment, smiling before nodding your head, "Yeah. Yeah, let's head out." You stood up straight, Jaehyun pushing away from the wall, "Let me just let Yeri know where I'm gonna be at." You stepped around him, making your way over to the couch where Yeri sat, "Yeri." You tapped her shoulder, and when she didn't turn around you called her again, "Yeri!"

"What?" She turned to you, "Is something wrong?"

"I'm heading out." You spoke into her ear, "With Jaehyun."

Yeri smirked, nudging your shoulder, "Come on, stop messing with me." She laughed.

"I'm not messing with you!" You chuckled, "Hey, you have my location, and maybe I'll be back tonight, most likely tomorrow morning." You gave Mark a wave as you made your way down the hallway once more.

"Use protection!" She called loudly as you walked off, continuing her conversation with Mark. 

You made your way back to where you and Jaehyun were standing previously, catching sight of Jaehyun in the kitchen, bidding Johnny farewell with a one-armed hug and an untraditional handshake. The two were laughing as they both finished up their conversation, Jaehyun walking straight towards you, "You ready?"

"Yeah. I'm ready."

Jaehyun took your hand in his own, guiding you out of the frat house. The silence of the night was a comforting contrast to the loud frat party you were both victims of attending. The rustle of the leaves, the sound of wind whistling. It was the only sounds you could hear as your ears adjusted to the noise disappearing. 

The street lamps gave you better sight of Jaehyun's figure. His arms were ripped, to say the least. He had veins crawling up from his hand to his elbow, and his hand was a little rough, calloused skin from swinging baseball bats for a lifetime. 

The two of you approached a fairly new car, but still a few years behind the recent model. Jaehyun unlocked the door, and pulled open the passenger side.

"Thanks." You whispered, settling into the seat. You slowly buckled in the seatbelt, Jaehyun gently closing the door just as the realization just set in that you were in the car with a national professional athlete. The butterflies began to fly from your stomach into your throat, and you were worried if you even spoke that you'd just embarrass yourself.

Jaehyun climbed into the driver's seat, sighing softly as he reached up to stick the key into the ignition, "Sorry. I didn't expect to bring anyone back with me, so, I brought my less inconspicuous car." He chuckled softly.

"No, no! It's fine. I mean, you're already one step ahead of me. I don't even have a license, so, I have no right to judge." You matched his chuckle, smiling at him. "Besides, there's something more humble about an old 2008 Honda Civic." 

Jaehyun let the car warm up for a second before he pulled off from the curb, his hand lingering on the stick shift, his foot lingering on the clutch. 

You began to admire his hands once more. He had slender fingers, his wrist was adorned by a silver cuban link bracelet, another vein wrapping around his arm and ending at his bicep. You could tell he's worked out, but not too much. I mean, he is a professional athlete for a living, so him working out wasn't much of a surprise. Just as he stopped at a stop light, you pulled your eyes from his form and glanced out the window. 

The both of you drove through the heart of the city, your eyes catching the bright lights as you stared at the window. It was a nice difference from University Road. The quiet melody of music played from the radio, filling the tense silence between the two of you. Jaehyun clearly kept the car in good shape. There were zero stains on the seating, the steering wheel and bulb of the stick shift were a little worn from where his hands rested, the radio seemed intact.

Jaehyun continued to drive, clearing his throat, "You can change the channel, if you'd like to." He motioned to the radio, before he quickly downshifted, "I have a bunch of CD's in the glove box."

You took the initiative to open the glove box, smiling to yourself as you saw the CD case, unzipping and opening it. You weren't sure if you were smiling because he seemed like such an old soul for keeping CD's for his older car, or because it looked like the CD's were all in alphabetical order. "Crazy Town?" You questioned teasingly.

There was a slight tint at the shell of Jaehyun's ear, chuckling, "What can I say? They're revolutionary." He looked into his mirror and over his shoulder as he switched lanes, glancing over at you as he saw you eyeballing him, "What?"

"Just never took you for one who enjoyed rock music like this." You continued to flip through the CD case, seeing various discs of music; including, but not limited to rock, pop, hip hop and r&b. There were more genres that you didn't really recognize and you tried to read the fine print to see if they printed it, but no luck. "I think it's definitely fair to say you listen to every genre."

Jaehyun chuckled, watching you insert the Crazy Town CD into the reader, his hand quickly moving to turn down the volume, "I just listen to music. Genre doesn't matter to me."

You smiled to yourself, slowly turning the volume up as the CD started playing. The silence felt less tense now as the music played between the both of you. Given the circumstances, you needed the tension to die down. 

You looked out the window, not recognizing the area you were in very well, but you definitely recognized the giant building on the side of the road; two tall buildings beside each other, the sign reading "The Hallows".

Jaehyun took a very gentle left turn into the roundabout, stopping right in the middle as he climbed out and passed the keys to his 2008 Honda Civic to the valet. 

"You live... here?" You questioned, staring up at the buildings.

Jaehyun chuckled, grabbing your hand in his, "Yeah." He smiled, "It's pretty nice. Out of the way." He guided you into the lobby of the building, and you were even more awestruck.

Everything in the lobby were either expensively vintage or expensively new. They even had a couch you would see frequently in a magazine you glanced over while you waited in line at the supermarket. A couch you could only dream of purchasing. For this condo — penthouse, seems more likely — complex to have 4 sets of a couch that only the richest people can afford already told you what to expect.

Jaehyun greeted the front desk attendant, calling the elevator for the two of you, his hand holding yours gently. 

A small chime was heard just as the doors to the lift open, and he motioned for you to step inside. You took a step in, glancing at every corner, making eye contact with the camera. 

Jaehyun sighed softly, clicking the floor button as he stepped inside, stopping just beside you. "Sorry if this makes you all uncomfortable." He started, "I realize now just how awkward it might be to show up here. Like I'm showing off."

"No, no, it's not your fault! You make your money the same way I do, you're allowed to spend it where you please." You smiled, "And sometimes where you please to spend it is at a gigantic apartment building, and that's okay." 

Jaehyun chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck, "I'm just enjoying your company so much, I don't wanna scare you away."

You smiled to yourself, messing with your fingers as you glanced down at your feet, "I'm enjoying your company, too." You chuckle, "A lot."

Jaehyun smiled brightly as the elevator doors opened once more, and grabbed your hand back in his own as he guided you down the hallway, swinging your intertwined hands as he walked. His free hand grabbed his keys and skillfully unlocked the door, allowing you to step inside.

Which you agreed to, and you were met with a large condo, with a window large enough to span across the wall of his condo. The skyline was bright enough to light up the wall straight across from it. There was a giant kitchen, a giant living room. The whole place was giant. 

Jaehyun tossed his keys into a catch bowl by the front door, flicking on the lights.

"It's..." You paused as you continued to take in the sights, "It's beautiful."

"Yeah, my... Johnny and Mark kinda got a little excited with an interior designer and they decorated it like crazy."

You smiled, taking off your shoes to set them to the side before you took a step further. "Did you always have the idea to have an open floor plan?"

"Well, no, but like I said, Johnny and Mark got excited." Jaehyun chuckled, "Gave me a bachelor's pad when I'm hardly even a bachelor."

"Live while you're young." You whispered to yourself as you admired the city line. Jaehyun stopped beside you, but his eyes lingered on your reaction, which he was generally pleased to see.

Jaehyun cleared his throat, his fingers pulling at the cuff of his long sleeved shirt, "So, Mark told me a lot about you." He started.

"Did he mention how I let him cheat off my papers?" You teased, turning to look at Jaehyun.

"No, no, nothing like that." Jaehyun laughed, shaking his head, "But, he did show me your SNS accounts." 

"Oh, that's embarrassing."

"I think you looked amazing." Jaehyun whispered back almost immediately, "But, you look more amazingin person."

"It seems like we both looked up each other."

Jaehyun shrugged, "That's why I wasn't as upset when you did it." He smiled, "Where was I going with this?" He mumbled to himself, "Mark really talked me up for this." 

The tension between you both returned. And it wasn't an awful tension. It was tension that was telling you that obviously something was going to happen. You didn't know how long or what Mark said to him, but you couldn't help but thank Mark for whatever length of time he's been talking to Jaehyun about you.

Jaehyun cleared his throat again, feeling like all the words he prepared for this moment had disappeared from his mind. His eyes that were once watching you turned to look out the window where you were looking previously.

"You don't have to force yourself." You whispered, smiling at him. 

Jaehyun smiled back, turning to look at the couch, "Come on, let's sit down." He sat down on the leather couch, and you could notice he was in his element.

You followed, sitting beside him. 

"You didn't have to come here if you weren't comfortable." He started, his hand finding your own, "I know it's pretty awkward to get picked up at a frat party, and I never meant to put you in a position where you didn't think you could say no."

"Oh, I didn't think of it like that." You chuckled, "Trust me, if I wanted to say no, I would've." 

Jaehyun leaned a little closer, drawing his bottom lip in with his teeth, "Can I kiss you?"

God, you've been waiting for that question all night. Nodding your head, you smiled as Jaehyun's lips pressed against yours. The hands you have been admiring for the last 30 minutes during the car ride were now placed on your hips as he attempted to pull you closer until you were practically on his lap. He tasted of Heinekien beer, and spearmint, and you began to question when and where did he get gum or mouth spray from. Despite the mix, his lips were soft, and they were tender against your own.

Jaehyun pulled away slowly after a moment of kissing you, his hands lingering on your waist, his eyes opening to look into your own.

You both shared a small laugh, a lingering peck placed on his lips.

"You don't know how long I've wanted to do that." Jaehyun whispered, letting a sigh escape his lips.

Glancing at your phone's time, you chuckled, "Can't be anymore than 2 hours." You teased, "But, if it's any consolation, I've been thinking about it too."

Jaehyun rolled his eyes, "You really aren't aware of how much Mark's been trying to set me up with you." He whispered.

"Is that so?" You raised an eyebrow, "How long?"

Jaehyun sighed, running a hand through his hair, "Months, at least." He leaned his head against the back of the couch, the hair he pushed back falling back into his eyes, "He's been trying to set me up with you for the longest. Johnny, too."

You rolled your eyes, "You're telling me that tonight was one giant ploy to get us to finally meet?"

"No, no, definitely not. That was a frat party, through and through. But, I'm happy we could've met there." Jaehyun gently grabbed your hand, pressing soft kisses to your fingers.

"Are you always this romantic?" 

"Only with people I actually have feelings for."

"And that implies that there's people that you have had feelings for."

Jaehyun chuckled, "It does. But, none of them were you." He smiled, intertwining his fingers with your own. You looked at the size of his hand compared to yours, the length of his fingers compared to yours. Jaehyun had height, and his hands definitely matched that; slender fingers, thick veins, soft skin. His nails were well kept too, considering what he did for a living.

His words repeated in your head, and you had to stop yourself from smiling. To be desired and admired for that long, with nothing but Mark's words and your social media posts to hold him over. 

"Why didn't you just follow me and talk to me?" You chuckled, watching him kiss your hand and wrist.

"It's not like I have a personal account. I only have my professional one for work." He whispered softly, "Plus, I had to see if you were interested first. I'm not good at that over text." 

You rolled your eyes, "Excuses."

Jaehyun chuckled, "Maybe a little. I just didn't want to swing and miss." He smiled, "I have an idea." He sat a little closer, his fingers playing with your own again, "Why don't you come to the game tomorrow? I have one pass left."

"I don't know a single thing about baseball." 

"That's fine." He smiled, "I'm not expecting you to figure out the miles per hour of my fastball. I just... I think I'd do better with you there." 

"Who else is gonna be there?"

"Johnny, Mark, and your friend. Mark wanted to show off." Jaehyun's dimples made another appearance, and you couldn't help your heart racing behind your ribcage. "You don't have to say yes, but I'll be happy if you were there."

You thought for what felt like minutes, but in reality, it was nothing but seconds, "Yeah. I think it'd be fun."

"Unless we totally lose." He chuckled, "My only excuse would be that I was too distracted by you."

"Are you always this cheesy?" You smiled, shaking your head.

Jaehyun met your smile with his own, "I can be." He shrugged.

"It's cute." You whispered, "I'd love to see you play, Jaehyun."

Jaehyun was physically fighting his excitement, giving another shy smile, "Great. Great." He chuckled, squeezing your hand. "If that's the case, we should probably head to bed then. We've gotta be up early if we wanna make it in time."

"Right." Your hand reaches for your phone in your back pocket, and you open your contacts, getting ready to call a taxi to pick you up, "I can get a cab ride home."

"I was thinking..." He locked your phone, "Maybe you could spend the night here." He whispered shyly. 

"Oh." You thought for a second, "Oh!" 

Jaehyun chuckled, "Doesn't have to be anything more than innocent, if that's what you want." He stood up from the couch, your hand lingering in his. "Come on, I have some clothes you can wear."

"Please don't tell me you're gonna dress me up like Adam Sandler." You stood up, letting him guide you down the long hallway to his — once again — gigantic bedroom. The lighting was dim, and you would've thought he had the lights on the entire day if it wasn't for the sound of the switch flipping. There was a bay window adjacent to the bed set of velvety black duvet, sheets and dark stained bed frame. 

Jaehyun let you linger by the door while he wandered off to somewhere around the corner, only to return with a red dirt stained baseball jersey and a pair of sweats you were sure weren't going to fit you. "Here you go."

You snapped back from admiring his bedroom to grab the clothes, smiling at him, "Did you wash this?"

Jaehyun nodded, "Red dirt stains. Only way to get it out is power washing." 

"Good enough for me." You laughed, "Where should I change?"

"Oh! Right, right." He stepped behind you to guide you by your shoulders to the double bathroom, "You can change in here." He looked at you through the mirror, smiling softly, "And, if you aren't comfortable with us sleeping in the same bed, I can always take the guest room."

"You have a guest room, too?" You chuckled, setting the spare clothes he gave you on the counter.

"Yeah. The bed isn't as comfortable in there as it is in here, though." Jaehyun continued to watch you through the mirror before he turned his eyes away and walked out of the bathroom, "I'll let you get changed." He nodded, shutting the door behind him.

You took a little longer to admire the bathroom, your fingers running across the granite counter, the big mirror and the nice black sinks. He had a walk-in shower, lined with dark grey tile. You peeked around the sliding door to the shower, catching sight of a shower ledge where the occupant could sit. 

You smiled to yourself before you turned to start changing your clothes, pulling on the clothes Jaehyun was nice enough to offer. It smelled like him. And they were nice and soft.

You folded up the clothes you wore to the party, setting them to the side of the sink closest to the door, gently opening the door.

Jaehyun sat on the edge of the bed, standing up as soon as you stepped out, "Hey."

"Hi."

"They look better on you than on me." Jaehyun chuckled softly, blushing a soft pink, pushing his hair back with his hand, "I knew they would."

You raised an eyebrow, chuckling softly, "Is this your way of saying you wanna see me wear your clothes more often?"

"Yes, definitely." He wore clear framed glasses, andyou could swear you saw them fogging up from the blush growing on his cheeks. "I definitely want to see you in my clothes more often." He grabbed your hand in his own, squeezing it gently.

"We'll see." You teased, squeezing his hand back.

Jaehyun smiled, "Did you think... about...?" He pointed at the bed, silently asking. 

"If you want me to, I can sleep in the guest room." You started, "I mean, it's your bedroom. I am a guest."

"I have no issue sleeping in the guest room. The whole bed thing... that was a joke." Jaehyun cleared his throat, obviously tense. "The mattress in the other room is just the right amount of soft and stiff."

You had to stifle the laugh that threatened to leave. "Jaehyun, really, I don't have an issue sleeping in the guest room."

He nodded his head, "Okay, okay." He smiled awkwardly, "But, really, I wouldn't mind if you stayed in here with me. Just put this whole thing behind us." He laughed.

"Hm, that might be easier." You continued to hold his hand as you sat on the edge of the bed, "As long as you promise to not crush me."

"Don't worry. I sleep like a log. Fall asleep in one position, wake up in the morning in the same." He held up his hands in defense, "I also promise to try to keep my hands to myself."

"Haha." You laughed sarcastically, sitting him beside you.

"I'm just kidding. I'll keep my hands to myself if you want me to." He nudged you, intertwining your fingers together.

"And if I don't?"

Jaehyun raised an eyebrow again, glancing at you, "Then I won't."

You smiled, "Sounds like a plan." You let go of his hand to crawl up to the head of the bed, laying on your side as you rested on a pillow.

"What? Like you not wanting me to keep my hands to myself or...?"

You laughed, "Just come lay down. It's already almost 3am and you said we have to be up early, didn't you?" 

Jaehyun took off his glasses, setting them down on the bedside table, laying down on the pillow next to yours, a soft smile on his face. 

☆

You aren't sure when you fell asleep, and you definitely weren't sure about how you ended up with Jaehyun's arm over your hip, the alarm clock beside his bed blaring the god sound of the "Apex" ring tone. You slowly sat up, rubbing your eye and running your hand through your hair. You took a second to remember the scene of Jaehyun's bedroom before your eyes, turning your head to admire him. You were aware how odd it felt that you were allowing yourself to lay beside him in his bed, wearing his clothes. You weren't sure why you were doing this. 

You tried to convince yourself it was the alcohol you had the night before but you weren't even tipsy, let alone drunk. You could feel the butterflies flutter in your stomach as you thought about the night before, studying his face as he slept. You wondered how many people would kill to see this view. 

"Jaehyun." You whispered, leaning against your hand, brushing some hair from out of his face. 

"Hmm?" He grumbled, obviously half asleep.

"It's 8 a.m." You responded gently, quietly trying to coerce him out of his slumber, "We're gonna be late, Jaehyun."

Jaehyun groaned, pulling his arm back to his chest as he sat up and pressed the stop button on his home screen. He sighed, pulling his legs out of the covers so they could touch the ground. 

Some moment throughout the night, Jaehyun obviously pulled on a large white t-shirt and sweats, expelled the shirt from his body (evident by the white t-shirt thrown at the foot of the bed), and went to sleep. 

His back was muscular, his shoulder blades prominent as he stretched his arms above his head and in front of him. His fingers wiped at his eyes before he pulled on his glasses and stood up to stretch further.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked gruffly, turning to look at you, "I hope I didn't hog the bed too much."

You fought with your eyes as they wanted to linger on the happy trail below his belly button, settling on shutting your eyes as you smiled at him, "It was perfect, Jaehyun."

The sound of rustling sheets made you open your eyes to find Jaehyun on all fours, his face impossibly closer to you, "Good." He whispered, using a hand to pinch your chin with his thumb and index finger, "I've been thinking about kissing you again since last night."

Your cheeks turned red, and your heart raced in your chest. "Why didn't you do something about it earlier then?"

"You looked too beautiful sleeping." He smiled, "But, if you'll allow me, I'd like to do something about it now."

You smiled, "I'll allow it."

Jaehyun chuckled, cupping your cheek to press a kiss against your lips. His lips were still as soft as they were the night before, his hands gently as his thumb rubbed across the skin of your cheek. Despite it feeling like minutes, it was only seconds in reality until Jaehyun pulled away.

"Can I consider that my good luck kiss for tonight?" He asked softly. 

"Yeah." You chuckled, "And if you win, I'll maybe consider giving you a victory kiss as well."

"Sweet." He nodded, moving back to climb off the bed, making his way to the bathroom, "I'm gonna take a quick shower."

"Alright."

"I'll be back."

"'Kay." You smiled as he stepped into the bathroom and shut the door, immediately reaching over to the nightstand to grab your phone. 

You don't know what you were thinking staying the night when you didn't even have a change of clothes. You sent Yeri a quick text asking her to grab you a set of clothes, anything would do. Especially something warm. 

You can tell she agreed when she started calling you on Facetime, which you answered.

"How was it?" She asked as soon as the call connected.

"What do you mean?" You asked, turning down the volume as you sat back against the headboard.

Yeri rolled her eyes, sitting up in her own bed, "Come on, share all the details." Her screen switched to "Paused" and you could only assume that she was scrolling either on Instagram or Tw- "Holy shit! You're at the Hallows?"

"Yeah, that's the name of the building."

"Y/N, how out of touch are you?" Yeri started, her face returning to the screen, "The Hallows is where all the famous people live, like Lee Jongsuk and Seo Inguk."

"Well, if you're asking, no, I haven't seen anyone." You started, "The lobby looked expensive, though."

"I've gotta see this!" She stood up, "Okay, tell me what outfit you want then I'll head there."

Yeri entered your room at your shared apartment, opening your closet and turning the camera to show you different shirts, pants and other fabrics. You both took about 30 minutes of the call deciding on a good outfit, before you both settled on something.

"I'll be there in a few. What should I do when I get there?" Yeri asked, folding the clothes neatly into a bag.

"I can grab the clothes from you in the lobby." You nodded, "I'll see you when you get here."

"Bye. Love you."

"Love you, Yeri." You responded before ending the call. 

You heard the shower water come to a stop, and you fully expected Jaehyun to walk out of the bathroom but you sat there, staring at the door as he stood behind it. 

A text from Yeri came through your phone and you stood up, making a slow trek to the front door, which you opened and closed behind you. You remembered the door number, and the floor number, and you memorized the button you'd have to press to get back up. You suddenly felt awkward to even walk down into the lobby wearing Jaehyun's clothes, but the awkwardness melt away as you saw the area empty. Yeri was the only one there, recording herself for her Instagram story. 

She was too absorbed in recording the lobby that when you stood in front of her as the camera panned to you, she jumped, a yelp getting cut off just as she released the button. "Jesus, you scared the crap out of me." She said through a laugh, patting your shoulder. 

"Do I look that bad?" You questioned, grabbing the clothes from her hand.

"No, you don't look bad. You know me." She chuckled, I brought you some extra shoes too, so you don't have to worry about wearing the ones from yesterday." 

"You're awesome."

"It's really nice in here." She started, looking around the lobby, "I almost feel too broke to be here." 

You ran your finger over the clothes, chuckling, "I felt the same." You smiled, "So, how'd it go last night with Mark?" 

Yeri smiled to herself, "Well, I think it went wonderfully." She paused, playing with her keyring, "He asked if I wanted to come with him to Jaehyun's game today." 

"I heard." You laughed, "At least you'll have me to play wingman."

"You're coming too?" She smiled, "Awesome! Now I don't have to be so nervous." 

You laughed, "I've gotta get ready. Jaehyun's already in the shower and everything." You gave her a hug, "Get back safe."

"Text me if anything new happens!"

"Same with you." You called the elevator, watching her walk back out to her car, where you're sure she'd play her song of the week over and over until she got tired of it.

You retraced your steps as you stepped into the elevator, thinking of the night before as Jaehyun clicked the floor button to get you up to his place. The elevator stalled, then moved upwards. 

You felt the same butterflies in your stomach as you rode the elevator up, smiling to yourself as you glanced down at the clothes you held in your arms.

Could you even begin to consider this a date? You thought to yourself, It could be considered nothing more than just visiting Jaehyun's workplace. 

As the elevator stopped, you made your way down the hallway and stopped right outside Jaehyun's front door. You knocked on the door, waiting patiently for him to open the door. Which he opened, to him wearing nothing more than black sweatpants around his waist, his hair dripping droplets down his collarbones. 

"Hi." You looked at him.

"Hey." He chuckled, "I thought you left."

You shook your head, "Without my shoes?"

"Good point." He opened the door a bit wider for you to step inside, which you did.

"Yeri just brought me some clothes to wear for today." You motioned to the folded clothes in your arms.

"That's nice of her." Jaehyun smiled, "You can use the bathroom to change if you'd like." He closed the door, "I'm making something to eat as well."

You nodded, making your way to the bathroom in the hallway, quickly changing into the outfit Yeri and yourself picked out through the video call. It looked almost as nice as you thought when you imagined it. Sure, the black shirt was darker than the washed out black pants, but you think that added to the charm. You folded up the clothes Jaehyun offered the night before on top of the washing machine in the bathroom, slowly opening the door into the hallway once more. 

It smelled of maple syrup and coffee, and you took a seat at the island in Jaehyun's kitchen as you watched him cook. It was simple breakfast food; bacon, eggs and some rice. You spot the coffeepot brewing, the soft sound of the java hitting the glass pot. Jaehyun seems to have taken a step away from the kitchen to pull on a shirt to wear. 

"Thank you." You whispered softly as he set a plate down in front of you of the food, taking a bite of the bacon. 

Jaehyun smiled at you, taking a seat beside you as he started to eat his meal with you as well. It was silent, save for the water used to make the coffee coming to an abrupt halt. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence, not at all. It was comfortable. Like sitting in silence together was comforting enough. 

As soon as you both finished, Jaehyun cleaned up, poured himself a quick cup of coffee after offering — which you respectfully decline, "trying to cut back," you'd joke — and grabbed the bags by the door that you didn't notice earlier. A giant duffle back, and a backpack that looked like it's been through Hell and back, littered with handwriting, even some quips from Mark and Johnny. You joined him in The Heights spacious garage, climbing into the newest Genesis model as he opened the door for you after he shoved his bags into the backseat. 

Throughout the car ride, as his phone connected to Bluetooth and changed through the songs, Jaehyun would grab your hand every once in a while, not paying much attention to it as he drove to the stadium. You didn't bother moving your hand. 

Jaehyun pulled into the back of the stadium, parking his car in some obscure area and helped you out. There were news tabloids, sports enthusiasts and paparazzi everywhere, and you felt your heart racing in your throat. But Jaehyun made quickly to avoid them, pulling you in front of him as he stepped through the door before the cameras started flashing. All you saw before it shut was a blinding flash.

Jaehyun sighed softly, adjusting the bag over his shoulder, "This is where we split off." He whispered.

You felt upset. You spent nearly the last 12 hours with him and for him to split off from you now for who knows how long felt so weird. You could tell you grew attached to him.

"Hey," Jaehyun chuckled, "The game doesn't start until 6:30, you've got the rest of the day to chill." His hand trailed down your arm before he grabbed your hand.

"I know." You chuckled, "I do have some homework I was planning to finish from last night, so I could do that while I wait."

Jaehyun smiled, "Great." He rubbed his thumb against the back of your hand, "Come on, I'll show you where you'll sit when the game starts." He began walking, silently passing you his jacket and let you sit down in the front row of the seats, watching as the field attendants chalked the dirt, and maintained the advertisements against the barriers. 

Jaehyun walked off after you sat down, giving you a wave as he walked off to where he needed to go.

You didn't realize how focused on your schoolwork you were until you felt the cold breeze and the loud chatter of other attendees. The stadium lights were turned on and the field attendants you saw hours ago were no longer there. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat as people push by your legs; unsure whether you should stand up from the chair to let people through or pull them up to your chest. You pulled on the coat Jaehyun had given to you earlier around your shoulders, waiting patiently by yourself for the other three guests to arrive. 

And when they did, you smiled up at them.

"Yo, Y/N, what's up?" Mark gave you a headnod, sitting on a seat only one away from you. Yeri and Johnny followed behind Mark. Your best friend taking the seat right beside you.

Johnny sighed, "You guys are gonna make the tallest, lankiest guy push through you all?" You could tell he wasn't irritated, clearly making a small joke as he stepped over your feet to sit in the seat beside Mark. He sat down with a sigh, adjusting the jacket over his shoulders.

Mark and Johnny shared a quip with one another, Mark sharing a boisterous laugh like he always did. 

Yeri nudged you, smiling sweetly, "So, what have you been doing while waiting for the entertainment to return?" She asked.

You held up your phone, the word document plastered on the screen, "Homework."

"Like always." She sighed, "You look nice."

"Thanks." You smiled, quickly saving the document before you shoved the phone in the pocket of Jaehyun's jacket.

You and the trio all spoke to one another, talking about school, interests and other things to fill the time before you caught sight of the teams walking through their thresholds.

Attendants around you all began to share chants of their respective teams, some going as far to shout out jeering taunts to fans of the away team.

Johnny and Mark seemed familiar with this, standing from their seats and clapping as the teams prepared with their coaches for the game.

You caught sight of Jaehyun laughing, the mit around his hand worn and clearly aging. He looked around the stands, waving to fans before he stopped and glanced at you, giving a small wave and shy smile. 

The crowd exploded with a loud cheer after he waved at you, and the teams were off.

☆

A little over four hours later, the Sentinels had yet another win under their belt. Johnny and Mark were critiquing the plays made by both teams, while you and Yeri were busy trying to understand what the hell was happening in real time. It was different for the both of you when you were watching the plays in real time without any type of commentary or slow-mo videos to show the play. 

The wind picked up during the middle of the game and you were thankful Jaehyun gave you his jacket. Although, you weren't thankful for the wind sending a foul ball straight into the barrier net to keep the audience members safe. You could feel your heart racing, turning to laugh with Yeri, who was also frightened.

As soon as the game came to an end, everyone filed out of their seats, making there way to food stands or tailgates in the parking lot, where fans celebrated the Sentinels victory. Johnny, Mark, Yeri and yourself opted to waiting by the locker room for Jaehyun to walk out.

You held Jaehyun's coat over your arm, playing with your fingers as you waited. Mark and Johnny were having their own conversation while Yeri stood beside you, doing some complex edit to the photo she took with you and the boys to post on her Instagram story. 

"Dude, I'm hungry!" Mark complained, leaning his head back against the wall, rubbing his stomach.

Johnny snorted, "Yeah, I bet you want that stadium hot dog."

Mark gave his usual chortle, hitting Johnny's arm in a playful way, "Shut the hell up, dude." He spoke through his laughe. 

Yeri leaned against the wall beside you, sighing, "Yeah, I'm hungry, too. I haven't had stadium nachos in years."

"Yeri, the last time you've had stadium nachos was at school at the football game last week." You teased, locking your phone as you looked at her. 

"Well, it feels like years." She mumbled, looking at Mark, "Wanna come with me?"

You could see Mark's eyes light up, nodding his head rapidly, "Yeah, yeah, let's go."

Johnny kicked off the wall, his hands shoved into his jacket pockets, "I might as well come, too. Don't want you two to get lost." He looked at you quickly, "Wanna come, Y/N?"

"No, I'm okay. I ate before I came." You smiled softly, "You guys go eat. I'll wait for Jaehyun so he doesn't think we ditched him." You waved them off.

Yeri held up her phone, "Well, text me if you want anything."

You nodded your head, waving to them as they walked away before you leaned back against the wall as you pulled out your phone to occupy the short amount of time. 

You were invested in the random video of how fossils were formed, blackhead videos, mukbang ASMR, and other interesting videos. And you would've kept watching if you didn't see the last of the team file out of the locker room, save for the dark haired male you came with. You watched the team leave, and you pulled a frown. 

You began to question what was taking him so long, but decided to leave it as it was. It wasn't your concern what was taking him so long. You were a guest.

You looked at the locker room door for a moment longer, and hovered your thumb over the pause button on the video about who knows what — you blocked that information out. And just as you were about to press play, your phone chimed and vibrated.

jaehyun:

no one's in here, if you wanna come in.

so you don't have to wait in the cold.

delivered 1 sec ago

You blushed; for one, it was the men's locker room. And second, you didn't know where your thoughts were going. All you could remember was this morning, where Jaehyun pulled open his front door with just a towel on. You kept the text open for a moment, before you approached the locker room door. You looked both ways three times. One look was too quick. The second, in case any one was approaching. Third, for extra measure. 

Your fingers held onto the handle for a second as you contemplated a little more, the metal handle cold from the breeze drafting through the open stadium. 

You pulled open the door, peeking your head in slowly, "Jaehyun?" You called softly, your voice echoing off the walls, making it seem louder than you intended.

"Over here." Jaehyun responded, and you quickly stepped inside, the squeaking of the hydrolic hinge echoing just as loud as the door latching behind you. Your shoes hit the ground as you stepped in further to find Jaehyun within the maze of lockers. 

And you did find him. He stood by a locker, a black Sentinels branded towel hanging low around his waist. It's clearly not like you haven't seen him shirtless, let alone half-naked. You saw both visuals this morning. But it was the fact his hair dripped drops of water down his back, over his shoulders, even down his face. The fact his back and arms were so muscular. And the very obvious fact that beside the towel, he wore nothing at all.

Jaehyun turned around briefly, chuckling, "Hey." He whispered softly.

"Hi."

He smiled to himself at your small voice, using his hand to keep the towel around his hips. He seemed... shy? More shy than you've grown accustomed to. You were thinking that it was definitely because of the circumstances of where his clothes were. He cleared his throat, "Hey, I just... uh," He started, grabbing your hand in his own and stepping a little closer to you, "I wanted to say thank you for coming to see the game." He squeezed your hand in his own, smiling shyly, "It's the first time I've actually had so many people come see me. Uh, in terms of VIP."

"I'm glad I could come, too." You smiled back, "I had fun. Plus, it was nice to see an actual baseball game in person, and not on a television." You tilted your head to the side as you thought, "Although, I didn't expect that many grown men to get excited when you waved."

Jaehyun laughed, "Yeah, they can get pretty excited." He smiled, "But, I think that kiss you gave me this morning gave me the good luck I thought it would."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." He chuckled, glancing away for a quick second, "Does that mean I get that victory kiss you were talking about?" He asked softly, the hand that held his towel tightly was released, cupping your cheek with it. "You said you'd consider it."

You laughed, kissing his lips softly. 

Two days. Two days of electric tension bubbling between you guys was finally boiling over the top as you both kissed. You could tell Jaehyun was kind enough to act as the gentleman he always was for these two days, but from the way his hands wandered as you both moved your lips in sync was enough to tell you that he was desperate to touch you, to claim you as his own.

At first, he had one hand against your cheek, then both hands resting on your hips, then before you knew it, Jaehyun's hands trailed down your legs, and guided them around his waist as he lifted you up effortlessly and seated you on his lap as he sat on the bench in the middle of the floor. Jaehyun's lips never stopped moving against your own, his thumb rubbing your thigh through your pants as you straddled his hips.

Jaehyun parted from the kiss momentarily, glancing at your face as your lips grew swollen from the kiss. His hands moved from your thighs and found their way under your shirt, his thumb brushing against the skin of your stomach. "You look amazing." He whispered, placing open-mouthed kisses against your neck. 

You rested your hand against his neck as he kissed yours, your other brushing your fingers against his arm; over the veins you admired the night before, over the carpal boss of his wrist before he intertwined his fingers with your own again. Jaehyun's hips pressed against your own as his chest did the same with your own. 

"Jaehyun." You whispered softly, squeezing his hand in his own.

Despite the gentle whisper, Jaehyun had no intentions proceeding without anything more, pressing his lips to your shoulder through the fabric of your shirt, "Hm?" He hummed out, pulling away slightly to look at you, "What's wrong?"

"I just didn't think we'd share a moment like this in the locker room." You chuckled shyly, looking at him, "Not that I'm complaining, it's kinda hot, but..."

Jaehyun cupped your chin, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, "I understand." He whispered, "How about this? I'll get dressed and then we can head back to my place — or yours, I'm okay with either."

You nodded softly, climbing off his lap and sitting on the bench while he stood up to get dressed. He pulled on his briefs with the towel around his waist, loosening it to throw over his head and dry his hair. 

You looked around the locker room to avoid getting caught staring, admiring the red and black walls, the Sentinels logo in the center of the wall. You over analyzed every detail; how crooked the logo was, how some of the red bled into the black, even how there were smudges of paint left on the lockers. Maybe you were being a bit too critical; after all, you weren't an artist and sometimes mistakes happen. You began to beat yourself up because why would you criticize art if you couldn't even draw a stick figure, let alone a giant logo like the Sentinels had. Maybe you'd take an art class.

When you looked back at Jaehyun, he was dressed in his usual attire, the attire you were most accustomed to. The grey, baggy cargo pants, the black muscle tee, the backwards Sentinels baseball cap. He looks just how you were first introduced to him, and it was comforting. He grabbed his bags and wrapped his arm around your shoulder as he led you out of the locker room.

"Hey! There they are." Johnny called, a half eaten corn dog held in his hand, "We were looking everywhere for you two."

Yeri held the paper boat of nachos in her hand as she gave you a knowing look, biting into a cheese and jalapeño covered chip.

Mark breathed heavily, "I ran around the entire stadium looking."

Jaehyun chuckled, shaking his head, "You guys didn't have to do that." He smiled, "Well, we're gonna head out."

"Why don't we get something to drink as celebration?" Johnny suggested, taking a bite of the corn dog.

"Sorry. Have plans." Jaehyun shrugged, guiding you past the three of them. 

Yeri took another bite of her nachos, "Wear protection!" She called, more so to you than Jaehyun, or at least you think so.

"Dude, ew!" Mark's laugh echoed off the walls as you and Jaehyun walked off.

Jaehyun was on a mission trying to get you both to the car so you both could get out of there and relieve some sexual tension. Not only did he have to deal with some of the teammates of him stopping him, he also had to deal with team managers, coaches, and some fans of him that were begging for autographs and photos; which he gladly accepted, because he wouldn't be anything without the people who supported him. That continued the whole entire way as you both walked to the back of the stadium where he parked earlier in the morning. 

Jaehyun slowly peeked out of the door before he closed it as soon as he opened it, "Here." He whispered, swinging the backpack to his side and pulled out some sunglasses, "There's gonna be a lot of cameras flashing, so wear these and only look straight ahead." 

You nodded, pulling on the sunglasses. Jaehyun grabbed your hand in his own, and slowly opened the door again, guiding you out with him. And that's when you understood what Jaehyun meant; the flashes of the cameras were speeding in at one per second. Jaehyun was used to it, but you definitely weren't. He gave a nod, a wave, even a handshake to paparazzi, keeping you close to his side. There was a security guard that helped you both make way to the car. You wondered how so many people were able to obey one security guard, let alone with that many people.

The car was inches away from you both, Jaehyun's fingers grazing the handle to the passenger side door, helping you inside. 

"Jaehyun, is that your girlfriend?" A paparazzi shouted, continuing to take pictures, most likely blurry from the nudging and shoving from other paparazzi. Since when did athletes have the same amount of paparazzi as superstars. 

Jaehyun shut the door, giving you a smile as he shoved the bags into the backseat, "Yeah, she is." He responded to the paparazzi, shutting the door and let the security guard guide him to the driver's side. The security even went as far to check under, on top and inside the car's backseat. 

Once the security gave the go ahead, Jaehyun pulled out of the car lot, his hand immediately finding your own. 

"Sorry about that." He said, making his way back towards his place.

"Oh, it's okay." You took off the sunglasses he gave you, holding them by the nose bridge as you folded the arms, "I feel sorry you have to deal with that. No wonder you drive a Honda." You smiled.

Jaehyun laughed, "I meant saying you were my girlfriend." He glanced at you, pausing the music on his phone, "It's easier to say that than explaining we're in a talking stage, you know?"

"It's fine." You glanced at his side profile, "I know what you mean." You mumbled, "I don't mind. Being considered your girlfriend, I mean." You smiled to yourself.

Jaehyun smirked, squeezing your hand, "You sure about that?"

"Yeah."

Jaehyun nodded, playing the music to fill the silence. The music playing varied between The Weeknd, Lloyd, and even some underground artists you had no clue existed. But the one variation that they all had in common was that they were heavy intented with sexual innuendos and sexual tension. You have no idea if Jaehyun made a playlist with these types of songs or if they just happened to be playing on shuffle back to back. But either way, they were definitely setting the mood. 

Jaehyun pulled into the roundabout, grabbing his bags before passing his spare car keys to the valet and helped you out of the vehicle. 

"Why don't you park it yourself?" You questioned, reaching for the strap of Jaehyun's backpack and throwing it over your shoulders. You were genuinely curious, glancing up at him.

Jaehyun shrugged, "I don't know. They only allow employees out there. I guess it's the luxury part of the apartments." He guided you inside and to the elevator, clicking the floor button that you memorized from this morning.

You chuckled, "Do you like living here?"

"It's nice. But, I'm not much of a big house guy. I've never been interested in it." He leaned against the railing of the elevator, the duffle bag between his legs as you stood in front of him.

"So, why get a giant apartment?"

Jaehyun shrugged, "The commissioner of the team paid the lease if I agreed to join the Sents." He glanced down at his hands, "But, I'd much rather having a nice little apartment."

The elevator rung and stalled to a stop as you both reached the hallway, your hands never leaving one another's as he guided you to his door.

You felt the butterflies grow in your stomach, your heart beating in your throat and your hands clam up. Was now a bad time to say you can't remember the last time you've had sex? You really don't understand why you're feeling so nervous all of a sudden, you were both having a great conversation in the car and now, you felt like you were about to throw up.

Jaehyun pushed open the door, setting the duffel bag on the ground under the upholstered bench at the entryway, kicking off his shoes. You followed, setting the backpack down beside the bench and neatly placed your shoes next to his. You were trying to buy time to settle the butterflies in your chest by rearranging the shoes a little bit. And when you stood up, you gasped when you felt Jaehyun's hand on your own, once again. 

"If you're too nervous, we don't have to continue." He spoke in that soft voice, the same one you grew accustomed to since the night before. "I'm nervous myself."

You took a deep breath, sighing softly, "I'm nervous but... I want this."

"Are you sure?" 

"Yes."

Jaehyun stepped closer, your back pressed against the front door, he cupped your chin, his thumb brushing your bottom lip, "Can I kiss you? Is that okay?"

You nodded your head, "You don't have to ask."

Jaehyun kissed you — feverishly. Like a man starved, he pressed you against the door and kissed you like any man would with the woman they love. You felt his hands wandering again, squeezing your hips before wrapping his arm around your waist to pull you closer to him. 

His tongue found its way into your mouth, rubbing against yours. You could feel him through his pants, and he was hard. You so desperately wanted to touch him, but you didn't want to cross a boundary he might not like, so you settled for kissing him back as feverishly as he was.

A gentle groan escaped his lips as you pressed against him, a whispered "fuck" breathed into your mouth. He tapped his fingers against your thigh, silently telling you to jump up, which you obliged. He steadied you with the arm around your waist, and guided your legs around his hips as he held you effortlessly.

"You okay with moving this to the bedroom, baby?" He spoke with a gravelly voice, his lips swollen from the kiss. You felt the butterflies grow in your stomach again, your heart racing, and your panties growing wetter as he looked at you with those gentle, yet dominant eyes. You couldn't help yourself but nod.

Jaehyun smiled, carrying you over to the bedroom, crawling onto the bed and resting you on his lap as he continued to kiss at your skin, his lips trailing along your jaw, neck and shoulder. "Do you wanna continue?"

You nodded, your hand running through his hair, "I do."

Jaehyun smiled, pressing soft kisses across your face, "Okay, baby." He placed one soft kiss against your lips, adjusting his position so you were laying back on the bed, and he was between your legs. He reached over to the bedside table, pulling out a condom and looking at you softly, "Open it for me?" He chuckled.

You grabbed the packet and tore it open with your teeth, passing it to him, "Expecting a lot of play?" You teased, motioning to the box of condoms.

Jaehyun smiled, shaking his head, "Only if you want to." He nudged your leg playfully, "And I'm hoping after this, you're the only one I fuck."

You bit your bottom lip, smiling sweetly, "I haven't had any complaints yet." 

He set the condom off to the side, skillfully unbuttoning your bottoms and pulled them off your legs, throwing them off to the side.

"Oh, my—" You mumbled.

"I'll buy you a new one." He whispered, his hands pulling off his shirt, "Anything you need, I'll get it for you." His shirt was the second piece of fabric added to the growing pile of clothing, his hands pulling off your own shirt, "You're so pretty." He whispered breathlessly, "You don't understand how hard it was to keep my hands off you." 

"You shouldn't have." You smile softly, brushing your fingers through his hair as he kissed at your collarbone.

"I'll keep that in mind." Jaehyun's breath fanned against your chest, and he looked up at you, "You're so beautiful. I was hypnotized when I first saw you in person, I swear."

You laughed, "Did Mark push you to come pour my drink?"

"No, I took that initiative myself." He smiled, his fingers tangling in the waistband of your panties, "I was sick of waiting." He chuckled.

And you were sick of waiting. It's two days of complete sexual tension and it was almost painful waiting for anything more to happen. You can't remember the last time you had this much sexual tension with someone, let alone the last time someone desired you this bad.

"Jaehyun..." You whispered out, as he pressed kisses to your hip bone, "Please, I can't wait anymore."

He smiled, pressing a soft kiss to your hip once more, "You can't wait anymore?" He teased, "I spent months fantasizing about this, and you can't wait anymore?" He hummed.

"You know what I mean." You whined, feeling your cheeks blush as you leaned your head back against the pillows.

"Okay, okay, baby. I guess I shouldn't keep you waiting any longer." His dimples imprinted his cheeks, sitting up from between your legs and grabbed the condom from beside him, "You've been patient and I appreciate that." He dipped his hand into the waistband of his pants, his cock resting in his hand as he rolled the condom on, slowly pumping himself in his hand, "Fuck, look what you do to me, baby."

You wrapped your legs around his hips, using the heel of your foot to pull him closer to your heat.

Jaehyun's hand pressed against the pillow you laid on top of, guiding the tip of his cock into you, slowly pressing into you, "Oh, fuck..."

"Oh my god..." You whispered out, tangling your fingers through his hair as he pressed his chest against yours, pressing open mouthed kisses to your neck.

"I'm gonna start moving, baby."

"Mmhmm..."

Jaehyun slowly began thrusting into you, the tip of his cock pressing against your sweet spot, your toes curling and fingers tightening on the hair on the back of his head. Jaehyun's long eyelashes brushed against your jawline as he continued to press soft kisses on your neck, "So soft, so pretty." He whispers against you skin, his tongue wetting the plain, gently sucking.

Gasping, you rolled his hips up against his, "Jae," Your words come out shaky, the heat moving from your cunt up to your ears.

"Sensitive there?" He whispered, nibbling on the skin, his hand moving from your cheek to press between you two to rub his index and middle finger along your clit. 

"Fuck!" 

Jaehyun chuckled, "You're so wet, princess." He smiled, his hips continuing to press into your own, "God, I imagined how pretty you'd look underneath me for so long." His cock twitched against your walls, a moan escaping his lips, "Feels so good... Could keep fucking you forever."

The words you wanted to speak disappeared just as quickly as they appeared, listening to your thoughts echo Jaehyun as he continued to press into you. Silent babbles were occupied with whines and moans, clenching down on his dick as he moved. "Jae, Jae,"

"I gotcha, baby. I'm right here." He whispered softly, rubbing your legs, "Jae's right here."

You groaned as Jaehyun grabbed your hips, guiding you along his length, "So good..." You whined.

"I know, baby. Like you were made for me." Whispering in your ear, Jaehyun's fingers found their way to your clit once more, flicking it gently, "A pretty, soaking wet pussy just for my dick."

You jolt slightly as Jaehyun flicked you clit, a heat wave washing over your body as it blushed, simultaneously, goosebumps covered your skin from Jaehyun's words.

Jaehyun smiled softly, whispering sweet nothing against your ear, "So tight. It feels so good."

"Fuck, Jaehyun...." You whispered out, your throat straining as you attempted to speak.

Jaehyun's fingers worked against your clit, continuing the same pace of his hips, "Does it feel good, baby?" 

The words he whispered were enough to make your pussy jump, nodding your head. Glancing down at the bulge of your stomach, you couldn't help the moan escape your throat, "Oh, fuck." 

Jaehyun groaned, his hand lingering on your hip, "Look at you..." He whispered, more to himself, "Wanna fuck you everyday."

Jaehyun's voice was hoarse, his eyes staring into your own. He leaned closer, kissing your lips in contrast to the brutal pounding of his hips. He hummed against your lips, sliding his tongue between your lips and rubbed his own against yours. 

Jaehyun pulled away for a moment, looking at you, "Can I taste you, princess?"

It was a question you honestly couldn't refuse. You nodded your head, whining softly at his exit but allowed him to continue to kiss down your body, his breath fanning against your wet cunt.

Licking his lips, Jaehyun hummed softly at the white cream around your hole, "Shit..." He whispered out, pressing soft kisses against your sensitive clit.

"Jae!" You yelped as his lips pressed against you, blushing softly as another wave of heat covered your core.

Jaehyun smiled, the dimples on his cheeks making an appearance before he delved into you, his tongue licking your hole, savoring the flavor. 

You gasped softly and let your hands immediately slip through his hair, feeling the soft strands tickle the inside of your wrist. 

He was eating you out like a man starved, his fingers pressing into you as his lips and tongue danced with one another against your pussy. Jaehyun's eyes closed as he continued to thrust his fingers into you and taste you against his tongue, the cold of the ring around his finger soothing the burn of your body.

You could only handle so much more as he curled his fingers into you, gasping and whining as he teased the spongey spot inside you. Your pussy fluttered around his fingers, moaning softly, "Ri- Right there, Jae."

Jaehyun's fingers continued to rub against the spot, his tongue lapping up all your juices that dribbled onto his fingers like it was juice rolling down his hand. 

Your pussy sobbed as he continued tasting you and teasing you, feeling the warm coil break in your stomach, the creamy cum coating every line of his hand, covering the silver ring that pressed against your hole and leaving a white ring around the base of his fingers.

"Fuck," he whispered against you clit, moaning softly as he slowly moved his fingers inside you, "That was hot."

You whined shyly as he continued to press into your heat, his fingers never moving from the spot inside you, "Keep moving your fingers like that, and I'll cum again."

Jaehyun smiled, "I'm always up for a challenge." He teased, kissing your thigh, "Only if you are."

You blushed softly; how could resist such an invitation? You were so out of practice that you were out of breath only after cumming once, you had to at least repay the favor.

"Can I suck your cock?" You asked gently, sitting up on your elbows.

Jaehyun chuckled softly, moving his fingers out of your cunt, "Do you want to?"

You used this chance to adjust your position and lay across his lap, your mouth salivating at the sight of his cock, covered in the clear condom. You looked up at him with shy eyes, nodding your head.

"You gotta say it, baby." He whispered, his fingers brushing against your cheek.

"I wanna." You mumbled, entangling your fingers with his own.

Jaehyun smiled, leaning forward to peck your forehead, "Good girl." He whispered in your ear, "Go ahead." He guided you with his words, letting you roll the condom off his cock and kiss at the red cherry colored tip. A groan parted his lips as he settled his hand against your head. He didn't push, he just used it as silent praise, letting you take your own pace with what you were doing.

Yet, his hand on the back of your head almost gave you the motivation to do more; You wrapped your lips around his cock, slowly bobbing along the length, using your tongue to tease the slit of his cock. Your hand moved downward, rubbing against his sack, listening to his whines as you sucked him off.

Jaehyun glanced down at you, using his hands to move your hair away from your face and wrap it gently around his hand, "You're gorgeous." He whispered, as he admired your lips turning a swollen red, your flushed cheeks, your pretty fingers rubbing against him and your eyes lidded as you savored him on your tongue. 

Looking up at him through your lashes, you moaned at the praise, tasting the pre-cum leaking against your tongue. Pulling away with a thin string of saliva keeping you both connected as you took the moment to pump him in your hand, the pre-cum oozing from his slit.

"Fuck," Jaehyun leaned in closer, pressing his lips against yours to taste himself against your tongue, "You're so pretty." He moaned as your hand continued to move against his member.

You smiled softly, "You're not too bad looking yourself." You smiled, "Taste good too."

Jaehyun smiled softly, soft whimpers leaving his lips as you wrapped yours back around the cock head. Your finger traced the vein on the underside of his cock, drool dripping from your lips down his girth.

"Shit, f-fuck," He whined, "So close, baby. Keep going."

Listening to Jaehyun's sounds was enough to encourage you to continue until his muscles tensed, heavy pants escaping his throat. The taste of Jaehyun's cum against your tongue was like a hunger that you weren't aware you had sated. You had the taste linger on your tongue as you pulled away from his cock, swallowing the thick release.

"God, baby..." Heavy breaths, messy (but still insanely perfect) hair and flushed cheeks only suited him more, "That was perfect."

You smiled, laying back on the bed as you soak up the compliments.

Jaehyun lay beside you, wrapping his arm around your waist as he placed soft kisses against your neck, jawline, cheek.

You both continued to cuddle, letting Jaehyun fawn over you as you laid with one another until either of you fell asleep. You didn't mind being doted on. It was kinda nice.

copyright © 2024 thewonandonly. all rights reserved.

[whereisten]

Promises

Part 1 | Part 2 | more coming soon

“I make no promises, I can't do golden rings, but I'll give you everything tonight”

Pairing: Mafia Leader!Jaehyun x female reader (cafe owner)

Genre: Friends to lovers au, fluff, smut and angst

Warnings: gun and violence mention, blood mention, stalking, unprotected sex, slight choking kink, slight impregnation kink, oral sex (female receiving), rough sex, overstimulation

Word Count: 6.5k

((A/N: this is a short fic series inspired by the song “Promises” by Calvin Harris & Sam Smith. It's been some time! Y/N is now a bakery shop owner! I hope you enjoy this short series, I believe there will be four parts. If you're a jujutsu kaisen fan, the Geto version will be added to our ao3 :)))

----------------

[2 Months Later]

It’s 10:30 PM, the chairs are up and you’ve just about finished mopping the floor. Jaehyun sighs and leans back into the driver’s seat of his car. He’d been watching you every night since he left. He couldn’t stand to not be near you, or to not make sure you were out of harm's way once you left work and walked home at late hours.

If he hadn’t messed up that night, if he hadn’t been vulnerable with you and given into his heart's desires life a selfish, touch-starved man, he would still have a friend. He could keep you company when you closed the bakery, and talk to you about everything. Just like the days before that night.

You lock the front door with your keys, and start your journey home. 

You sigh, dragging your hand bag over your shoulders and buttoning your coat. “Well, at least there’s no rain tonight.” Your eyes and legs are tired, and all you want to do is climb into bed and enjoy a cup of hot chocolate, maybe you’ll watch a movie. You put your headphones in and fix your hands into the coat pockets

You’re about halfway into your 25 minute walk when Jaehyun notices two men following you. As usual, he drives slowly, and without his headlights on the dark road so you don’t suspect being followed. The two men walked out of an alleyway as if they were waiting for you to pass them. Jaehyun’s brows furrow. He knew you couldn’t hear their steps because you were listening to music, but how couldn’t you feel their presence?

“Shit.” He grumbles, knowing that he will have to make himself known if he is about to stop these men.

2 minutes later and they still huddle together while walking behind you, however, you bop your head to a new song just released by your favorite k-pop group.

“Oooo I’ll have to add this one.” You say to yourself, adding the song to your Bakery’s playlist on Spotify. By the time you look back up, you see a car swerve right in front of you.

“Holy-“

“Get in!” Jaehyun unlocks the door of his coupe, which is now perpendicular to the sidewalk, blocking you in with no choice but to get in.

Your look of shock turns into one of disdain. You take your headphones out. “You’ve got some nerve.”

You walk in front of the car and flash both middle fingers before continuing home.

Jaehyun curses under his breath, swerving the car back into the street to drive beside you.

“Listen, let’s talk about it, okay? You just need to get in right now, I’ll take you home.”

“I don’t even know who you are.” You roll your eyes.

“Y/n! Stop fucking around! Get in!”

“Hey hey hey…no need to get aggressive, man…she said she’s not interested.” A strange voice says from behind you.

Before you can turn around to see his face, he drapes a heavy arm over your shoulders to stop you from walking any longer.

“Leave her alone…she told you to get lost.” Another man speaks, your eyes widen.

“You alright, sweetheart?” They turn to you, your heart begins to race as you get an immense feeling of dread.

Jaehyun quickly puts the car in park and jumps out. He walks towards them as they pull you back. “Get off of her.”

You reach out for him with pleading eyes. “J-“ you start, but you feel something circular pressing into the small of your back.

“Oh no, we’re saving her from you, she’ll be perfectly fine once you’re gone.” The man chuckles.

“Tell him to get lost or we’ll put a hole in you.” The other whispers into your ear.

You gasp and look back up at Jaehyun.

“Fuck off dude, you’re a creep. Isn’t he, sweetheart?” He presses it in more.

“I-I’m fine, just go away!” You look at Jaehyun in hopes that he will listen, one wrong move and it could be either of you with a new bloody hole to model.

Jaehyun lowers his hand and nods. “Okay.” He walks away and jumps back into the car. You feel a sense of relief, but it's short-lived as you are now subject to whatever these men want to do with you. You feel disappointment and despair. Did Jaehyun really give up on you that easily? Could he really abandon you in this moment when you needed him the most?

The men drag you back into a dark alleyway.

“Please! Leave me alone! Don’t kill me!” You beg for your life in hopes that they will just leave you alone, that they’ll have a sudden change of mind. But deep down you know they’ve been planning, they’ve finally caught a victim and don’t plan on stopping now.

They only laugh and tie your hands together behind you while you sob and plead.

“Quiet down, sweetie, you’ll live but only if you shut the hell up.”

One of the men says before throwing you into the brick wall. You grunt as you feel your back collide with the rough surface.

The man is about to say something else when you hear a sharp, high-pitched noise echo into the night. You shut your eyes, flinching when you feel blood splatter across your face.

When you open them you see the body of one of the men laid out right in front of you, a small hole in his forehead gushing out blood as his blank eyes stare at you. You scream, and the other man grabs your coat, yanking you in front of him before pressing a gun to your temple.

“Who the fuck is there?! I’ll shoot her right now!” He looks around anxiously.

The alleyway is completely dark, you can’t see anyone, but the man backs away thinking that the shot came from the right side.

He stumbles over his friend's body, releasing his tight grip on you in the process. You take it as your chance to run away. He tries to run after you, “Hey you bitch!, get back-“

Before he can finish, another shot goes off. The man lets out a blood curdling scream and drops to the ground. You quickly turn around, panting as you see his shadow finally come to light.

Jaehyun.

Your dark-haired savior walks slowly towards the crying man with a sniper gun in his hand. He lugs it around like it's nothing, but based on the length, noise, and precise shots, you know it’s heavy. You swallow hard as you watch his menacingly large figure create an engulfing shadow over the man.

As he walks under a street light that the man has dragged himself to, you see a completely unfamiliar look on Jaehyun’s face. He’s angry, no.. he’s outraged, and the dark glare in his eyes makes your heart race. Is it because he’s hot, or is it because he’s terrifying? You’re not sure.

Nonetheless, he doesn’t give the man a chance to beg. He cocks his gun and shoots his other kneecap. The man places both hands over it and cries out while laying on his back.

“No!! Please don’t! I’m sorry, we weren’t gonna hurt her!” The man cries out when he sees the grim face of Jaehyun looking down on him as he crawls away.

Jaehyun cocks his sniper gun again.

You finally snap out of your daze and run towards him. “No stop! Don't do this!” You yell out.

Jaehyun doesn’t respond to neither you nor him, he only aims for the crying man’s crotch area. He shoots him again and cocks his gun. The man struggles to back away from him as he aims it at his head. 

Jaehyun is so furious, not a word escapes him, he only feels rage and sees red. 

But just as he’s about to pull the trigger again, you jump onto the ground in between the gun and the man.

“Jaehyun! Stop! Please, he’s learned his lesson.” You pant, your arms till aching as they are tied behind your back.

“Move.” Jaehyun’s tone is dark, you don’t even recognize him.

You swallow hard, hoping you can get through to him. “Jaehyun..it’s not worth it, the police are gonna be here any second now, just leave.”

“I said move. I’m gonna blow his head off.”

“No! I won’t allow you to! This ends now.”

Jaehyun’s voice raises. “They put their hands on you! They were going to hurt you! They deserve nothing but pain!” 

“Yes! I agree, but you’ve done enough! Get out of here!”

Suddenly, police sirens start to get louder, it's as if someone called them after hearing the shots.

“Jaehyun..help me, please.” You look up with wide eyes, and finally, Jaehyun snaps out of it.

He finally puts his gun by his side and leans down to help you up. 

He looks back at the man and kicks his head hard, leaving him crotchless and bleeding out on the dirty ground alone.

The two of you run back to Jaehyun’s car.

 He helps you into the passenger seat before jumping in and speeding away.

“Jaehyun, what the hell! You–you just killed someone.” You cry as he drives maniacally to your place.

“Are you okay?” He ignores your panic.

“Okay? Okay?! No I’m not fucking okay, Jaehyun, I just witnessed a murder! There’s- there’s blood all over me!” 

Once at a stop light, he takes his pocket knife out and cuts your zip ties. 

“Are you hurt?” He asks as he examines your soft face and body.

You sigh and look into his worried eyes. Damn it, why did he have to look at you like you’re his world? “I’m..listen I’m fine, but what you did was not okay, you just killed-“

“It’s what I do y/n.” He says lowly, calmly, but with a scary tone. The light turns green and he continues driving. The street lights illuminate his sharp features and you feel your heart drop. The man you had a deep longing for lived to kill, and killed to live, that’s the reality of it. He had no regrets whatsoever after taking a human life.

This was normal for him.

His fist tightens around the steering wheel. Your eyes catch a glimpse of the thick veins in his arms. “If something happened to you..I couldn’t live with myself..I’m sorry you had to see that, but it was necessary.”

He looks at you then quickly looks away, hiding how his eyes started to fill with water. You didn’t deserve to be treated that way. You’re just trying to get home after a long day of work. What if he wasn’t there to save you? What if he lost you? And he realizes once again why you two could never date. You’re nowhere near ready to see him for who he truly is.

You take a deep breath and relax into your seat, resting your elbow on the door. Your fingers shakily press against your temple as you look out of the window . “Jaehyun..you can’t protect me from the world..you can’t just hover around and follow me everywhere.”

“Why the hell not?” His nose scrunches.

You flick your head towards him. “Because you’re not my boyfriend! You yourself said you regretted ever meeting me, you never wanted to see me again, and yet, here you are swooping in like fucking Batman!”

Jaehyun clenches his jaw and abruptly parks his car outside of your apartment building. 

“I mean nothing to you..you should start acting like I don’t.” You look down at the floor and say sternly.

He sighs. “Y/n..I—didn’t..” he stumbles over his words as you sit there in silence.

You look back up at him, and he wants to hug you, he wants to hold you and get lost in your beautiful eyes. He takes a moment to breathe in your scent, still fresh and pretty after a long day at work. 

“What?” You watch him as he stares.

He sighs and looks out of the window. “You can get out now.”

You purse your lips and nod, tears threatening to escape. “...the next time I see you outside of my job, I’m going to call the police.” All this time, you knew he was watching. 

Jaehyun turns back to you with a puzzled expression. Night after night, you’d seen his black sports car parked a few feet away from the bakery. You knew he was there, and you never approached him about it. 

You look into his eyes before opening the door and stepping out. Jaehyun doesn’t protest as you slam the door and head inside.

Once he sees your apartment light turn on, he drives away, angry at himself once again. What if someone saw him with you? What if they knew he had a weakness and knew where that said weakness lived?

He lays in his bed after taking a hot shower and falls asleep quickly. 

“Jaehyun..”

“Hnnn..” His eyes struggle to open.

“Jaehyun..baby.”

“Yes…hmmm.”

“Need you..” 

Jaehyun hears your soft voice and feels your warmth. He opens his heavy eyes to see that he’s back in his car. This time he’s in the backseat with you beside him. 

“Y/n..” He rubs his thumb over your cheek to check if you’re really there. You lean in and look into his eyes before kissing him deeply while closing your eyes. 

 Jaehyun turns his head and groans into your mouth as his tongue traces over your smooth lips. Cherry. The same cherry balm he tasted when kissed your lips the first time. 

The hunger in his chest grows, he grabs you by the waist and brings onto his lap, your arms still tied behind you as you moan. He handles you like it’s nothing, pushing your skirt up your hips and to your waist before pulling you down harder onto him. 

He releases your lips finally, a string of spit dropping down your chin as you whimper. He pulls his pocket knife out and quickly cuts the fabric of your underwear, a move that has your skin riddled with goosebumps in no time.

He looks at the knife, thinking about how he should also cut your zip ties, but also thinking of how he doesn’t really want to. Something about you being bound, restricted, and doomed to ride him until you swelled with his offspring made everything hotter to him.

He looks up at you while brushing his fingers over your opening. It's silky with your essence, already building just from your kiss. You throw your head back and start to grind onto them as he teases you. “You’re so beautiful.” He whispers, gazing up at your angelic face. He swears he’s already in heaven.

His fingers finally enter you, a high-pitched moan escaping you once you feel them stretching you out. 

“I-I’m ready!” You move faster, finding it hard to hold back as you’re so wound up already.

He pulls his fingers out and wraps his arm around you to guide you down onto him. “Good girl…almost there.” He whispers while watching you take him in.

The sight is so satisfying, he doesn’t know if he’ll last all night. You gasp once his tip kisses your sweet spot, but you continue to move up and down like you did with his fingers.

You move easily, your essence and his pre cum being all the lubricant you need to fit him inside repeatedly. He groans, rubbing his large hands along your thighs.

“So—good, I can’t” You struggle to move steadily with your arms tied behind you, you’re close, but getting weaker. You close your eyes as tears escape.

He tilts your chin, forcing you to open your eyes and look down at him. “Don’t slow down, baby, you want me to fill you up right? Well, keep going.” He chokes you slightly as you whimper. 

“Yes..please cum with me..” 

He could see your breasts bouncing under your button down dress shirt from work, he could see them pop open one by one as you bounced faster. And your pussy, so warm, so tight around him. He can feel his tip twitch as you clench around him, threatening to coat your walls at any moment now.

“Oh my.. GodI!” Your head falls back. Sweat runs down into the crevice of your breasts. He grabs your waist with both hands, taking over to slam you down onto him at a faster pace. He thrusts into you aggressively, chasing after a high that he knows he’ll remember well after tonight.

If you thought you could drop him after this, you’d be so wrong. He’d never been happier, never been hungrier, never been more anxious to fuck someone into oblivion like this. He could keep going if you let him. He’d have to recover quickly just so he can do it all over again in minutes, it would be difficult, but it’s not impossible.. He had to do it for you.

“Cum for me, baby, I know you want to....yes good girl, so tight for me.” He pants, his voice is gravelly.

“Jaehyun!” You cried out one final time before his eyes flew open. 

No. 

Jaehyun looks up at his ceiling and feels his bed under him. It’s wet with his sweat.

His chest is heaving and his dick is painfully hard, sticking straight into the sheet above him. “Shit. It felt so real.” 

He closes his eyes and rounds his fist around his dick to relieve himself, still imagining you clenching around him so beautifully while in his car.

He groans and wipes his forehead once he’s done. “This is gonna be hard.” He knows he should respect your wishes to not see him again, but deep down he knows he will have to. He knows he’s in too deep, and letting go is impossible at this point.

[One Month Later]

Jaehyun tries to let you go, he doesn’t watch you anymore..well, not every night at least.

He told himself he was getting better, and if “getting better” included installing a tracking device on your cell phone to follow you instead of watching you outside work, then yes, yes he was “getting better.”

A guy in his gang that acted as a hacker sent a virus to your phone through a text message pretending to be a K-pop album sale link. And just as he expected, you got too excited and clicked it without thinking. By the time you realized it was a scam, it was too late. He was in. You shrugged your shoulders and went about your day like nothing happened.

He didn’t track you every day but just knowing that he could when he wanted to was enough for him.

He had just welcomed a shipment with his guys, when he decided to take a break and check on you. His brows furrow when he notices you’ve stopped by a particular place between home and work once again. What could this place be? A new friend? Or.. a new man? No, you wouldn’t do that to him..or would you?

He jumps into his car and tells his guys to finish everything up before speeding away.

When he gets to his apartment, he looks the address up and finds that it’s an apartment building that belongs to a wealthy banker.

He bites his lip as he contemplates what on Earth you could want with a banker.

He relaxes into his computer chair and shrugs it off. He shouldn’t be intruding like this, it isn’t right. He’ll let you handle whatever it is you’re doing. It must be important and necessary. So he doesn’t let it bother him…that is until one day when you have a date with the man.

He watched you go out with the banker that aged you by at least 15 years. You wore a gorgeous red silk dress and did your hair up. Your skin looked immaculate and your smile shone brightly in the dim lighting of the restaurant. He watched from outside, holding himself back from marching in there and crashing the date. If Mr. Bank thought he was gonna get lucky tonight, he was very wrong.

You smile and laugh with him so much, Jaehyun can’t take it any more. He drives away.

A few hours later, you enter your apartment and kick your heels off. You shimmy your coat off before walking into the kitchen to get yourself some water. 

“Where were you?” A deep voice asks from the shadows of your kitchen.

You jump up and walk backwards. “WHO-“

Jaehyun steps out with arms crossed and knitted brows. His hair is styled back to reveal his forehead, and grey shadow rests under both eyes like he hasn’t slept in days.

He still looks handsome though, his black T-shirt clinging onto his toned biceps.

“Jesus Christ!! Jaehyun WHAT THE HELL?” You quickly turn the light switch on then turn to your handbag, fumbling around for your pepper spray.

“It’s 3 fucking A.M. and you’re just now getting home.” He tilts his head, confused as to why you act like he’s intruding.

Your mouth falls open, the audacity of this man.

“Are you crazy? That’s it, I’m calling the police.” You reach for your cell phone in your bag, but as you search for it, Jaehyun walks up to you and grabs your wrist.

He quickly places your hand behind your back and backs you into the wall.

Your eyes widen as he towers over you. 

“Answer the question first.” He grumbles, looking down on you like you’re some kind of criminal that’s been caught stealing.

You shake your head and gasp. “I don’t have to answer to you! I’m a grown woman!”

Jaehyun smirks as his eyes trace downward, floating from your lips to your neck and finally to your pronounced cleavage.

“This is a really nice dress, y/n, did he like it?” His eyes are filled with fire and jealousy. He looks almost disgusted as he thinks about you giving your body to someone else.

Your eyebrows raise. “You’re still following me? You’re insane!” You struggle to pull your hand away, but you pound against his chest with your other hand. He quickly grabs it by the wrist and places it above your head, like it’s nothing. His neck cranes down to get closer to your face.

“Let me go!” you yell. 

He shakes his head. “Not until you answer me.”

“Somebody help me!”

He can’t help but chuckle. “Even if someone comes, do you really think they can help you? Do you want to watch another person die, y/n?”

You swallow hard, and even though he is frightening at this moment, you feel hot and lustful with the amount of power he has over you.

“What’s your problem? First, you say you regret meeting me, and now, you’re following me every day! I can't keep doing this! So what if I moved on? Yeah I fucked another man, now what? You gonna kill me?”

Jaehyun flips you around so he’s pressed against your back and you’re pressed in with both hands held by him.

You grunt as your cheek hits the wall.

Jaehyun leans into your ear and whispers. “Mr. Bank loves that cheap cologne on his dresser. I see him use it every day. But it’s funny because I don’t smell it on you. And that’s how I know you’re lying.”

Chills run up your spine.

“W-we took a shower together, did you forget that I like doing it that way?” You smirk. Jaehyun’s grip tightens as he becomes even more infuriated.

You were lying, but you liked to see him get riled up, maybe just maybe, he’d leave you alone so you could forget about him, so you didn’t have to touch yourself to the thought of him, so you didn’t have to look at the empty chair in your bakery in hopes of seeing him there one night.

“You’re intent on pushing my buttons..even with you pressed up against the wall..even with your hands behind your back. Aren’t you afraid of how bad it’ll get for you?” 

You chuckle. “Are you threatening me because I just had the best sex of my life?”

Jaehyun picks you up off of the wall and lays you down onto the counter face first with a hard push.

“The best huh?” He flips the bottom of your dress up to expose your ass in your thong. He then taps two fingers against your clothed folds, you jump slightly at the unexpected contact. “And yet..your panties are still intact and you’re walking just fine.” 

He continues to rub his fingers against you, pressing them in just barely. You whimper quietly. “Your skin is cold. Your thighs are dry and you’re reacting to my simple touch. You smell like you did the first time like grapefruit and berries..seems to me you’re just as untouched as the Virgin Mary.” 

Jaehyun whispers so deeply, you can’t help but grow wet. Damn it, he really knew you like the back of his hand.

“And if it was the best, why were you able to go back to your place? Why didn’t you just sleep there in hopes for round two?” He still drags his fingers in and out, teasing his digits along your opening by pushing them in slowly.

“Unlike you, he begged me to stay tonight but I told him “no, I have to be at work in the morning.” You let out, you try to have a sturdy voice as you slowly unreel from his long fingers.

“Please, y/n, the more you lie, the longer this will take. You’re not the whore you claim to be..” he whispers against the back of your neck, giving you chills once more, but you shake them off and speak strongly.

“You don’t know me! I did unimaginable things with him tonight!” You wiggle to try to escape him, but the strong 6-foot something man doesn’t budge.

“Oh is that so? Show me.” He leans back and presses your wrists down with one hand while unbuckling his belt with the other. He then ties your hands behind your back with it and steps back. He sits at your dining table and waits for you to walk over.

“I’d need my hands, Jaehyun.” You roll your eyes.

“Come on y/n, see how much you can do without them..” he taps his thigh.

You sigh and walk over to him. Why did he have this control over you? What if he just ends up leaving again?

“I shouldn’t do anything for you, you’re cruel.” 

Jaehyun’s low eyes trace over your body in the red silk dress as you walk over to him. “But are you doing anything for me, per se? No baby, you’re gonna use me to satisfy yourself after a disappointing date.”

His hands can’t help but find your waist. He forces you down onto his thigh but doesn’t do anything other than look into your wide eyes.

You look onto his neck and broad shoulders, you smell his simple and fresh cologne. You wish you could run your hands through his full head of hair and intertwine your fingers on it as you go dizzy.

He lets your waist go. “Or...you can just sit here and tell me you hate me. I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to, you know that.”

Your mouth falls open as you look at his lips.

“Go on..I’m listening.” He leans back and tilts his head slightly, looking down onto you with those low bedroom eyes. His gaze makes you tremble.

You’re so turned on from his touch, you continue moving against his thigh. He’d gotten you this far, why not finish it?

“I hate you because you won’t leave me alone. You send mixed signals. One day you want me, the next day you say it’s unrealistic to be with me. Make up your damn mind.” The friction of his thigh against your opening makes you light headed, but you push on.

“Before we do this again..I need to know what the hell you want from me, do you want me in your life or not?!”

“Y/n..of course I want you in my life...it’s just not safe for you..”

“Don’t you think I know that? I’ll be fine.”

He shakes his head. “I answered your question, you should answer mine..why are you home so late? What business do you have with that man?” He clenches his thigh and the sudden action makes you moan and shut your eyes tightly, you move faster.

“Jaehyun...it’s none of your business.”

He knew you were trying to get close to the bank manager so you could get another loan for your business, you needed to make improvements in the kitchen, decorations, flooring etc. and the money you made wasn’t cutting it. You figured that if you could find the right man to seduce, maybe you could get what you needed quickly.

Jaehyun knew this because he had seen the Google searches on your phone that went from “how to get a loan.” to “how to best seduce a man.” Hence, the red silk dress you wore, the glam hair, the intoxicating perfume that was quickly seducing even him as well, the high heels you wore to bring out your curves, and of course, the bra that made your cleavage noticeable to even the stars above.

“..let me protect you..and I’ll give you everything you need.” He kisses your neck and whispers into your ear while bringing one of your straps down your arm. He starts to kiss your shoulder.

You move faster on his thigh, swiveling your hips as his grip becomes tighter. “..that’s easier said than done..I want...I need to be completely yours, I don’t need a bodyguard.” You whimper and moan as he sucks your neck. Sweat builds onto your forehead.

“I don’t need your protection, I need your love.” You say breathily before finally releasing on his thigh. You rest your head on his shoulder, trembling while feeling your legs weaken.

He looks into your wet eyes and caresses your cheek while zipping down your dress with his other hand.

He then yanks your dress down to reveal your hard nubs. His hands cup your breasts, massaging them before tracing his thumbs over the peaks. “So beautiful, and only for me.”

He sucks them one by one, caressing them with one hand as the other grips your thigh, hard, so hard you know you’ll be sore for days. You groan in pain from his fingertips pressing in deep, and if your hands weren’t tied behind your back, you would’ve pushed him away.

He doesn’t let up, guiding your body forward and backward so you continue to leak all over his sweatpants. “Jaehyun!” You cry out in sensitivity, you cum again easily but he doesn’t stop. He won’t let you go, he continues to flick his tongue against your breasts. Your back arches, your clit is stimulated once more by his thigh, but it isn’t enough. 

He lifts you up easily and lays you down onto the table. He wants to make use of his time with you while you are bound, so he slowly drags your thong down your legs before throwing it to the side.

“Stay still..” he commands as your legs wiggle in an effort to get away from him. You whimper as he presses his fingers and thumbs into your thighs to spread you further apart.

He licks and sucks your clit as his fingers dive in deep. Your entrance, already sopping but welcoming him nonetheless. Your back arches again. “Jaehyun!” You cry out as you watch him devour you. His dark eyes lock with yours as he groans.

The tip of his tongue traces over your sweet spot as you throw your head back. You cum again, struggling to break out of his belt and grab his hair. He doesn’t stop, licking up everything that escapes as tears escape your eyes.

“Please.. I can’t- slower.” You plead, but he doesn’t care. He wraps his arms around your legs to keep them open and fixed around his head.

“Mmmm you taste so good, baby, and you’re all mine.” He chuckles then flattens his tongue against you.

He wants to make up for all the time he’d lost with you, he wants to consume you forever, to taste what he’s been craving all his life. He eats you out until you’re begging him to stop. Your wrists are tired of fighting against his belt, you try to kick his shoulders away again, but he simply smirks and grips your ankles tightly. 

“Don’t disobey me like that again, sweetheart.” His eyes dark and threatening as he looks up through his lashes.

You can’t stop moaning as your eyes roll to the back of your head and your back arches, threatening to snap completely.

He finally finishes when he’s had enough. He stands up from the chair, flipping your body over and lifting one of your legs over the table. He pushes the waistband of his pants down, releasing his hard member and grabs your waist. He runs his cock against your slit, parting it slightly with the head to gather your slick. 

“Gonna be a good girl for me right? Gonna follow my orders and cum when I tell you to?” He asks lowly.

“Yes! Yes..Jaehyun..I need-“

He pulls you into him, your ass shakes as you moan. The angle created by one leg lifted drives you crazy as he pushes himself deeper and deeper. You can’t stop yourself from clenching.

“Fuck..so good..cum with me, don’t let anything escape..I wanna see you hold it in for me..”

He buries himself in deep with each stroke, allowing you to feel every judge and vein as he runs his dick against your velvety walls. The table shakes with each thrust, he groans when he feels you clenching again. He moves faster, pressing his hand into the small of your back to keep you still. 

“Yes, don’t..stop!” You release onto him and chant his name as he moves in and out slowly.

“That’s it..such a good girl for me..” he rubs your clit to coax another orgasm out of you despite you being sensitive. 

You can feel his abs on your back, you can’t take anymore. You open your hands and try to push him away. He pushes in deep to make you squirm. “Give me one more, okay..you’re my slut tonight, gonna do whatever I say, right?”

“Jaehyun!” Your hands fail to apply any pressure.

He chuckles. “Are you disobeying me? Tsk tsk..you act like you can’t take it, yet you’re gripping me like it’s yours..”

He rubs his fingers in circles with more force and you can feel your essence dripping down your legs continuously now.

He thrusts faster and harder, the entire table moves as he pounds you like there’s no tomorrow. “Cum with me..cum with me right now..I’m gonna fill you up so you don’t forget who owns this pussy. so full..so warm, you’ll never give it to anyone else, that’s a fucking order, understand?..”

You can’t think clearly, you become dizzy. 

Jaehyun grabs your waist tightly to slam your ass against his pelvis and reaches his other hand around your throat to choke you. “Y/n! Do you understand?!” 

You struggle to breathe,  but nod and cum again. ”y-yes! Yes, oh my god!”

A loud groan leaves him while his movement stutters. He collapses on top of you as he empties himself finally.

After a few minutes, he sits back into the chair, turns you around and brings your limp body onto his lap as you pant. He holds you close by wrapping you in his arms, tracing his fingers delicately against your spine. 

“Jaehyun..just let me love you..please.” You rest your head onto his shoulder.

He does love you, everything about you makes him ache, you make him soft and remind him that he has a heart. He’d let his mind wander too many times, he let himself think of a world where the two of you could live together, have a few pets, get married, have kids..all sorts of “regular” things.

But love? Jaehyun is left speechless, he doesn’t know what to say, but he also doesn’t want to break your heart again. He was beyond worried for you. He unbuckles his belt from your wrists and helps you up.

He stands the both of you up then sits you back down. He looks down at you as you wait for his answer with pleading, wet eyes.

He shakes his head. “I’m sorry.” He fixes his pants.

You stand up on wobbly legs, take his head into your hands and kiss him hard. “You don’t have to be sorry, just give us a chance.” You say once you break the kiss.

He kisses you back before pulling away “I can’t.” 

Your mouth falls open in shock. “What exactly am I to you? Just a quick fuck and nothing else? Just tell me!” You turn away from him.

He feels his heart break again. “No! No..you’re much more than that..it’s-“

You turn back to him. “What? What the hell is it, Jaehyun?”

“I-I don’t know, I have to go.” He can’t look into your eyes anymore.

“No..don’t.” You grab his hand and tug him back. “Not again.”

“Y/n..I’m ....” he closes his eyes and shakes his head, keeping you from seeing the tears in his eyes. Why was he getting emotional?

The truth was Jaehyun had heard those exact words before. 

“no..don’t” 

It was the last thing his mom said to him. He was 16 and hell bent on doing his own thing. He ran away from home and decided to live a life of crime. He was stupid and broke her heart in the process, leaving her to die at home alone a few months later. At 12 years old, he had made a promise to protect and care for her when his father abandoned the two of them to take care of his other family.

Jaehyun needed to make more money and by the time he was 16, his friend offered an opportunity to make more money than he could ever imagine. It’s what he needed to do for himself and his mom, or at least that’s what he thought at the time. He didn’t know that all his mom wanted was for him to be safe and to grow up as a hardworking man she could be proud of. He disappointed her..and he feared he’d disappoint you too one day.

You sigh and let him go. “I don’t hate you Jaehyun, I just don’t understand you..”

He turns away from you to not show weakness once again. “I wish I understood myself, I wish I didn’t hurt you.” He leaves, slamming the door shut as you sink down into the chair.

[donkey-hyuck]

¡MASTERLIST!

WORD COUNT - 10.146

GENRE - angst haha | fluff | established relationship!au | CEO!au | slowburn?

CHARACTERS/PAIRING - CEO!jaehyun x orphanage caregiver!fem!reader | nct/wayv

INTRODUCTION - getting into a relationship when you were at the lowest point of your life dragged you down to the bottom. but it dragged the ones you loved as well.

WARNINGS - adoption/being an orphan | profanity (like a lot) | insecurities (major imposter syndrome) | being poor/poverty | panic attacks/anxiety/depression | alcohol consumption | (prescribed) pill intake | lots of dialogue | pet names 

TAGLIST - @xxvaelinxx @bbhmystar @actuallynarii @gfksz @jenosbliss

A/N - yikes this one’s a deep one :( the song is track five on the album and track three on the playlist. have fun breaking your hearts :’) (also hi ik it’s been literally centuries but it’s finally here pls don’t kill me (for the rushed end.))

DISCLAIMER - read as you please!! i don’t want to trigger anyone and please lmk if i missed any warnings! i don’t want to be insensitive to anyone's feelings. thank you <3 p.s. this is not proofread and im so sorry for the immense pause.

It wasn’t too far into your relationship when you broke down in front of Jaehyun. You didn’t know why but opening up to him just became natural.

To be fair, you were also a little ways past tipsy. 

In fact, you were a bit deep into the soju bottle you had bought while sitting outside of the convenient store when you first met Jeong Jaehyun, himself. Of course, you didn’t know he was the CEO of Jeong Peach Corporation at the time. 

Jeong Peach Corporation. A fragrance and personal hygiene corporation company whose audience consists of he’s, she’s, and they’s. The brand as a whole has this certain aesthetic that is appealing to those people. But Mr. Jeong Jaehyun himself also had a certain aesthetic that definitely matched the brand name he built from the ground up. His striking looks and simply the way he carries himself has men and women falling on their knees for him. But it was a little too late for them to capture his heart the way you did.

“Hey you! I can see you looking over here. How ‘bout’chu come over here and I’ll show you a piece of my mind,” you slurred and held up your fist. 

He was almost taken aback. Not because he was Jeong Jaehyun and you had the audacity to speak to him like that (again he carries himself in such a humble way that that would never be the option), but he was simply minding his business, walking to his car until he heard the sound of your drunk voice. He was definitely not expecting a drunk voice while he was ready to go home right around midnight. 

He chuckled to himself, too amused at the mere thought of you. But it was midnight and this was the darkest the sky was going to get. It was dangerous for you— for anyone— to be out this late, by themselves, downing a bottle of soju. Well, two and a half bottles of the infamous alcoholic drink. 

“Who are you? And why are you out here so late? Drunk?” He laughed, tucking his phone into his pocket, slyly grabbing a chair and sitting by you. 

“Suffering. It’s tough out here,” you took another shot.

“Hello, suffering. Why are you out drinking soju so late?” He teased. It was easy to get along with you it seemed, the alcohol brought out the extrovert in you.

“Hey! My name is Y/n. Not suffering…. I’m just saying I’m suffering because,” you paused. And he subtly leaned closer to you, wanting to hear the reason why you’re here by yourself, downing the whole damn bottle.

“…. Just because, okay. Now can you please go so I can drown my own sorrows by myself? I don’t need another pity party,” you sobered up for a moment, then went back to pour yourself another shot. 

But before you could take the shot, Jaehyun grabbed it from your loopy hands and took the shot instead.

“Hey! You don’t just take someone else's alcohol! That was the last shot too! Now I have to go buy another bottle!” You pushed yourself up from your seat only to be met with the hard concrete ground. 

“You shouldn’t be out here this late, miss Y/n,” he said, his voice laid with concern. 

“Who are you to tell me that? I don’t even know who you are,” you pouted, still sitting on the ground. He sighed to himself, showcasing his deep dimples, and got up from his chair to help you up. He was going to try and take you home.

“Hey! What the hell are you doing?!” He wrapped his arm around your waist to keep you up.

“Stranger danger! Stranger danger! This man is trying to kidnap me!” You yelled out. Of course, no one would really hear you. Besides Bong Cha— who was a goodie-two-shoes for Jeong Jaehyun and Jeong Jaehyun only— who walked out of the company right after her boss had. She saw the whole thing go down.

“Stop it! I’m trying to help you!” He struggled, since you were kicking and flailing your arms around in order to prevent him from taking you. 

“Help me, my ass. What do you want from me? Taking advantage of a poor, drunk, girl just trying to get in my pants? Get off me fucking psycho. My car is the other way,” you kicked some more. And he gave up, placing you on the ground once more.

“Please, Y/n, you have to work with me here. I just don’t want you staying out late. Who knows? You could actually get kidnapped if I don’t help you.”

“How can I trust you? I don’t even know your name. You may be handsome but it’s always the hot ones that are fucked up. More fucked up than me!” You exclaimed.

He sighed and rubbed his forehead. Maybe he should have just left you at the seven-eleven. But Jaehyun just sat on the ground next to you, a good distance away and observed your ridiculous, drunk, figure. 

“I’m Jeong Jaehyun,” he started, “now can you please cooperate with me? I’m trying to help you, here.”

You looked up and squinted your puffy eyes at him. “In your damn dreams, you’re Jeong Jaehyun. Like I’d believe that. I may be drunk but I’m not fucken delusional.” Oh, but you were delusional. 

You slowly raised from your seat on the ground and walked your way back to your car, which wasn’t actually where you parked it. The man followed you— sorta like a creep— just to make sure you were safe. But on the way to your car (which was not the right way at all), you bumped into Kim Bong Cha herself. 

She hadn’t seen her boss behind you because it was a little too dark but she lashed out at you anyway, “Hey! Watch where you’re going dumb bitch.” You were about to pounce on her until he caught you before you had the chance. 

“Let me go! Let me at her!” 

The girl was shocked to still see her boss shielding her from you. And she felt embarrassed to let him hear the rude words come out of her mouth. Karma’s a bitch.

“I’m sorry, Bong Cha. Please, go home. And don’t discuss this to anyone. I’m just trying to help her,” he explained to his secretary. Ah, so she was his secretary. That makes a lot of fucking sense.

Quietly, she speed-walked to her car leaving the two of you alone again. 

“Why didn’t you let me at her? She was being a rude asshole.”

“Y/n. She’s my secretary. And she’s always been like that. But don’t worry about her, okay. Please just let me help you,” he begged. It was too late for him to just leave you on the road. 

You sighed, the dizziness was now getting to you. 

“Fine. I need to get to my car, though,” you pushed him off of you.

“I don’t think you’re capable of driving right now,” he retorted.

“Then what the hell am I supposed to do?” 

And that was how you ended up sitting in the passenger seat of Jaehyun’s luxury car (the one he drove that day was his Aston Martin DB11.) 

That was how you first met Jeong Jaehyun.

So much for first impressions. 

—

When you woke up the next morning (with a massive headache), you found the CEO asleep on your couch. All in your shitty apartment. And when last night's events finally hit, you felt like the biggest asshole on planet Earth. 

Jeong Jaehyun was sleeping on your couch. In your shitty apartment that could definitely not even compare to his lavish lifestyle. You felt embarrassed all over again. God, what the fuck were you thinking?

You tried to clean up a bit before you woke him up but nothing would fix the slightly stained walls and the old furniture he was definitely a foe to. 

After you cleaned up the place, he still seemed to be fast asleep, so you decided to cook up some type of breakfast for him. The rusty refrigerator only consisted of greens (that were about to go bad), a carton of eggs, and a gallon of water. Sunny side eggs, it is. 

This was for sure nothing he was used to. He was a CEO after all. The CEO of one of the most popular global brands, might you add. Which made the whole situation so much more humiliating.

Whilst you were cooking, you looked over your shoulder because of the squeaking of the couch Jaehyun fell asleep on. You wanted to fall off the face of the Earth. 

Quickly you set the eggs into a plate and placed them next to his water you had already set on the table in front of him. He had only been awake for five seconds and he was met with the hospitality of you. 

“Mr. Jeong Jaehyun,” you started, “or— no, yeah. Mr. Jeong Jaehyun, sir, I’m so incredibly sorry for the inconvenience I left last night. You did not have to take me home. In fact you didn’t have to stay the night, which was kinda stupid on your part, not that I would ever call you stupid, even though I just did but-” he cut you off. You definitely rambled a bit too much. 

“It’s okay, Y/n,” he slightly laughed, picking up the chopsticks from the plate and eating the egg. 

You sat in front of the table, too defeated to say anything. Too defeated to even look at him— even in the few minutes he had been awake, he was more prestigious than you’ll ever be. You didn’t care about who he was. You really did, of course, but after the whole mess, you didn’t even want to be in his presence anymore. 

“Why are you so quiet, angel?” The pet name made you feel even worse. Why was he being so nice?

You gulped and looked at him. 

“I’m just- I’m so sorry about last night. I was just-”

“Suffering?” He cut you off once more.

The fact that he answered you and finished your sentence made you want to crawl up in a ball and never come out. Last night definitely placed number one in your list of horrible nights. 

“Uhm… yeah, that. But-”

“Why don’t you eat, love?” This was the third time he cut you off and the second time he referred to you as an endearing person. He acted as if he knew you for his entire life. 

“I’m uh- it- it’s okay. I’m not really that hungry so,” you trailed off, looking down at your hands while you played with your fingers. Just then, he shoved his chopsticks in your face. A piece of egg sat on it. He motioned for you to eat. 

You quickly turned your head and shook it, pushing his hand back, “No!” You cleared your throat, “it’s really alright, Mr. Jeong.” You really don’t know why you called him that but it just came out. It was probably the nervousness.

“Jaehyun.”

“Jaehyun… It’s really okay. I mean this is also the least I could do- uhm- especially after last night. Also, my house is a bit of a mess, I'm sorry about that.”

Jaehyun noticed the neighborhood and apartment complex you lived in. Of course, Jaehyun was a nice person so he wasn’t going to comment on it but it was obvious he noticed the living situation you were in. But none of it mattered to him. He just wanted to make sure you got home safely. 

“Don’t apologize about that, Y/n. Now eat.”

“I have more eggs in the fridge. I can make my own, don’t worry about it,” you felt your face flush with heat. He caved in and shoved the piece of egg into his mouth, still worried about you.

It was awkward for a long time until he finished his food. You took his plate and cup and put it in the sink. 

“I’m sorry. Do you want to wash up? Or maybe-” he laughed.

He had a habit of cutting you off, and you’ve only met this man all of eight hours. Most of those hours you were out cold.

“Stop apologizing, love,” he smiled at you, dimples on full display.

“I’m sorry-” you cut yourself off this time. He laughed again. You were cute. 

“I actually need to go to the bathroom. Could you show me where that is?” He asked. You nodded and pointed him down the hall to the left. He quickly thanked you and made his way.

Right when the bathroom door closed, you ran into your bedroom and plopped, face first, into the sheets. How degrading that was. 

When Jaehyun was done using the bathroom he got out and called your name which made you scurry out of your room to meet him from behind. You forcefully smiled and waited for what he was going to say.

“Your car is still at the convenience store.” Your fake smile dropped as you scrunched your nose, remembering how he drove you home. 

“It’s alright. I’ll walk there later. It’s no problem.”

“But-” this time you were the one to cut him off.

“You’ve already done so much for me. I owe you my life,” you joked.

He playfully scoffed and walked toward you, now directly in front of you,“Just let me drop you off. It’s a far walk.” 

“I can Uber or take the bus. Really, everything is okay. I don’t need you to help me anymore. You helped me more than I needed last night and I owe you everything I have.” You were so stubborn. He wouldn’t give up, though.

And there you sat in the same passenger seat as last night. 

“I’m going to wash up at my house first. Is that alright?” He looked over to you while at a red light. You had been looking out the window before he said that.

“Of course. Take all the time you need. I’m in no rush.”

—

You underestimated the home Jaehyun lived in. It was pure luxury. Fenced-in house with a security system (that, alone, probably costs more than your apartment), green upkept grass, and a beautiful white exterior and interior that screamed majestic, mature, and regal. It made your home feel like a shit-show. It made you feel completely horrible about yourself. 

“Please, come inside,” he opened the passenger side door for you.

Shakily, you unbuckle the seatbelt and exited his car. And he just sweetly smiled at you the entire time. It made you want to cry.

He led you to the front door with his hand hovering the small of your back. You could feel the heat of his hand through your shirt. You took off your shoes and followed him inside.

It was very bright and very aesthetically decorated. With plants (which you weren’t sure were fake or not), paintings that you had never seen before, and knick knacks that seemed too expensive for you to even touch. But he led you past everything in his house and went straight into his bedroom. He had a whole couch and side chairs as well as a fireplace. It was just as grand as the rest of his home. 

“Uhm, you can sit on the bed if you’d like. Or the couch, I don’t know. But I'll be done shortly. Please, make yourself comfortable,” he held your arm, informing you. But you were too stunned to speak, so you nodded your head instead. 

You sat on the couch, it was a little weird for you to sit on his bed when you barely knew anything about him (and he barely knew anything about you). Plus, you were too busy gawking at his house. And it made you feel self conscious again. It made you feel small; like you didn’t belong. Which you didn’t. So you don’t know why Jaehyun seemed so comfortable with you. 

He came out of his bathroom— that was attached to his bedroom— buttoning up his shirt with damp hair. He took as quick of a shower as he could, to not keep you waiting. And through the reflection of the mirror, he could see you with your head facing down again, probably playing with your hands. 

“Y/n, love,” he called out. You whipped your head around to his voice, not expecting that to escape his lips.

“Can you please help me button this?” You don’t understand why he called out to you as if you were his lover. Or at least someone he was comfortable with. Couldn’t he see that you were a bit lost? 

You sighed to yourself and wiped your palms against your pants, hesitantly walking up to him. 

Carefully, you buttoned up the rest of his shirt and looked up at him. He was already staring at you with all the love and adoration in his eyes. Of course, you didn’t realize this at the time. Jaehyun himself didn’t even realize it.

He then handed you his tie, “I hope you can tie a tie?”

You’ve tied many ties in your time of working at the orphanage. 

—

Warm Hearts Orphanage held a prolonged special place in your heart. You’d been going to the orphanage as far back as you could remember. The orphanage held children from infants to teens. And everyone there was like family. Even though your little family didn’t have much, it always warmed your hearts to give back to children who were less fortunate than you were. And though you grew up poverty stricken, these children suffered more than you did and all you wanted was to help them. 

You’ve seen children come and go, and the thoughts that always come to you is that they lived a happy life. Everyone in the orphanage deserved it. Even the sourest of apples, because all they wanted was to be loved by a family.

That being said, the orphanage always planned surprise parties for those children who had been adopted. It was a nice tradition, and you’ve helped many children get ready to graduate from Warm Hearts into a family that will love them.

—

“I can.”

As you were doing up his tie he slowly raised a hand to pat down your hair. The action made you pause your movements. Then, you realized everything that was going on was completely wrong and inappropriate, so you quickly finished doing his tie and took a step back. Your heart fell to your ass.

“What’s wrong, lovely?” You still felt like you were going to cry. 

“I- Nothing. Don’t worry about me,” you fakely smiled again. But, again, it was as if he knew you your entire life because he wiped the pad of his thumb against your lips, making you genuinely frown.

“How can I not worry when you seem squeamish? And these fake smiles plastered on your face. What’s wrong?” He stopped swiping your bottom lip and cupped your face with the entirety of his right hand; thumb rubbing your cheek instead.

You still forced a smile and wrapped your hand around his wrist, bringing his hand away from your face. You felt undeserving of everything he was doing to you. And you wanted to hide your emotions as much as you could.

“I’m okay. You can stop worrying about me. I’m fully capable of taking care of myself,” you released your hold on his wrist and held yours, crossed in front of your body. 

This time, with his left hand, he smoothed down your hair and let his hand rest on your face.

“Okay, pretty. If you say so. Now, let’s go get your car, yeah?” You bit your lip and nodded and he led you out of his house with his hands on the small of your back, just like he did when he was bringing you inside.

The seven-eleven you were drinking at just so happened to be located right next to Jeong Peach Corporation. Your car was still parked in the parking lot. And it was still nothing to ever compare to the CEO who was sitting beside you.

You both got out of the car, and he was standing in front of you. 

“Thank you and I apologize for last night. But if it weren’t for you, I’d probably be passed out on the sidewalk,” you awkwardly laughed. 

“No worries, love. And thank you for your hospitality. I’m happy you’re doing alright,” he responded.

You pursed your lips and pivot your heels to the direction of your car.

“I hope to see you again, Y/n.” Yeah right.

You pivot your heels back to the direction of Jaehyun. The embarrassment of last night and this morning still lingered in your body. There was no way you would see him again. You were from two completely different worlds. And there was no way you were coming back to this seven-eleven.

“I hope so too,” you said bitterly before rushing to your car. 

“Y/n!” He said before you could finish shutting your door. You groaned to yourself, stepping back out of your car and facing him again. You wanted to save yourself from the self-bashing already.

“Would you like to… maybe… grab something to eat later?” But damn, he was too nice to turn down. You wanted to say yes so badly, but another part of you wanted to decline. You just didn’t belong in his world. 

He was born to an upper class family, you knew that. Everyone knew that. So what would happen if you said yes? You had nothing to offer.

But it didn’t hurt trying, right?

You took in a huge gulp, “…. I would like that.”

“I’m sorry, what?!” exclaimed Danbi while the two of you were washing dishes.

The kids had just eaten and they were now free to do whatever they pleased, whether that was draw, sleep, or take a walk during the good weather. 

“Keep it down!” You shushed her.

“I can't! THE Jeong Jaehyun of THE Jeong Peach Corporation asked you out on a date tonight?!” She squealed in happiness for you, making the bubbles fly everywhere. 

You told her everything that had just happened within the past twenty-four hours. And she was beyond stoked for you. This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and she knew you deserved it the most. You’d been through hell and back and you’re about to go right back. She knew everything about your situation, you’d both been volunteering here for years so it was only natural to open up to one another.  

“No one said anything about a date…. Just a, uh, hangout. Yeah…. a hangout.”

“Y/n, he just met you and he’s head over heels for you already! I’m so excited for you!”

You were excited too. Way beyond excited.

—

Jaehyun said he would pick you up around nine p.m. You had just gotten back from grocery shopping and you now had a little over an hour to shower and get ready. You didn’t even know where he was taking you. 

But as you were applying your makeup and looking in your bathroom mirror, everything started shutting down on you. And you were surrounded with nothing but your own, suffocating, thoughts. You were a fraud. But Jaehyun was coming to pick you up soon, so now was not the time to think about it; or at least try not to. Fake it ‘till you make it.

When the knocking on your door signified Jaehyun's arrival, you quickly sprayed some perfume and opened up the door for him.

You were wearing a simple, spaghetti strap black dress with a slit on the side leg and a dark gray blazer with a matching bag. He looked the same as he did when you saw him this morning, except his blazer was now off of his body and he took off his tie which left him with his white button up (which he unbuttoned the first few to give him more of a casual look).

“Are you ready?”

☹ ☹ ☹

I told you I was down bad

You hate to see me like that

Two whole years had gone by and it was almost your third anniversary. Almost, as in, it was six months away. But so much can happen in a mere six months that seem to pass by so quickly. 

You were in your apartment, the same crappy apartment you lived in two years ago, crying in your sheets. Your damn thoughts were getting to the best of you again. 

And when you didn’t respond to Jaehyun’s phone calls, it was an understatement to say he was worried about you. So he drove to your apartment immediately. 

He frantically knocked on your door and almost broke it down until you came to open it, eyes still red from your tears and breath still uncontrollable. Your lover welcomed himself inside and shut the door, holding you so tight yet soft in his embrace in the doorway. He was trying to comfort you with his lips resting on your forehead and his hands carefully cradling your body.

“It’s alright, love. I’m here. Don’t cry. Please. I need you,” he repeated into your hair, rubbing your back and swaying you both side to side. But the action made you cry even more. You didn’t deserve the love he gave to you. Your head rested on his firm chest as you tried to calm down the pain.

“Angel, where are your meds? Are they in your room?” 

You nodded as best as you could as he carefully led you inside and into your bedroom. Jaehyun sat you down on your bed before grabbing a glass of water for you to take your pills. You hated relying on him so much. You hadn’t changed. But what you don’t know is that Jaehyun loved you even more than he did two years ago. He loved you because you weren’t afraid to show him such a vulnerable part of the human being you had become. Or so he thought.

You did what you had to do and he carefully pulled you into bed with him. Your head rested in the crook of his neck as he felt your hiccuping breath die down into slumber. He rubbed your back some more, hoping that it would lull you to sleep faster. 

You don’t know what you’d do if he wasn’t here. Jaehyun was your everything, as were you to him.

���

When you woke up the following morning, you were still in Jaehyun’s embrace. Slowly, you turned around to check the time and the clock read 5:43

a.m. That was why it was still dark outside. 

You turned back around to face Jaehyun and you sadly smiled at him. He worked so hard 24/7 and the purple bags under his eyes proved that. You just wished there was something you could do to help him, just like the various ways he had helped you. Jaehyun has always been there to help. From the day you two met, to this moment, Jaehyun was always your number one. 

You shifted around in his arms as he slightly groaned because of the sudden movement. 

“I’m sorry, love. Keep sleeping,” you whispered, kissing his closed eyes. He came to your house in his work clothes, though, so you were sure he was a bit uncomfortable. You walked to your wardrobe and found some folded up pajama pants he left over the other night as well as one of his gray hoodies he left ‘not on purpose.’ You gathered his clothes and walked to the bed to wake him up.

“Wake up. If you’re gonna keep sleeping, at least change, love. You’re probably all stuffy in your button up and dress pants,” you lightly shook him awake. He groaned some more before stretching his limbs and opening his eyes. You were the best thing he could ever wake up to.

Jaehyun playfully pulled the blanket over his head and managed to wrap his arms around your waist as you were sitting down beside him. You laughed at his antics and tried to free his grip on you. It failed; and you ended up wrapped under your sheets with him, his comfortable clothes still in your hands.

“What if I don’t want to change,” he challenged.

“You don’t have to,” you teased. “But it’s not going to be my fault when you complain about being uncomfortable.” 

His tight hold on you faltered for a moment before he fully released you and took off your blanket from his (and your) bodies. He released a puff and pouted his plump morning lips. The man sighed and got out of bed, taking the clothes you had in your hands and just stripping from his work clothes right then and there. 

“Aren’t you gonna change in the bathroom?” You asked, laying back down in bed. So much for getting up.

“Eyy, you know I don’t do that. I’m gonna come back into bed anyway,” he said before climbing in after you and pulling the grey sheet back onto him. As he slid into your bed, you wrapped your arms around his head as he rested himself to be held by you. Jaehyun loved being babied, especially in the early hours of the morning. It was one of the many charismatic features about him.

—

When you woke up the second time that morning, it was only nine o’clock. But Jaehyun seemed to be awake now, cooking breakfast that was sizzling from the kitchen.

Quietly, you sat on one of the stools and stared at him. He was the best thing that ever came into your life.

But why did he openly put himself in it?

You always wondered why Jaehyun stayed. It always turned into panic attacks and crying fits, but you couldn’t help it. He was a part of a completely different social status and you stood out like a sore thumb when you were next to him. It wasn’t like you were ashamed to be his girlfriend; you just thought he was ashamed to have you as his girlfriend.

He should.

There goes those thoughts again.

Unknowingly, you choked a sob which made him turn around. When he saw you, he smiled with pure adoration beaming in his eyes. God, why did he make this so hard?

He shut off the stove and walked toward you, forgetting about the breakfast he was making, it was almost done, anyway. Jaehyun wiped his hands with a towel and walked to you, cupping your face with his right hand, wiping the tear that seemed to fall from your eye.

“Why are you crying, love?” He still held the same, sweet, smile.

“…. I love you.”

He raised you from your seat and just hugged you, lips resting on the crown of your head, swaying you back and forth on the creaky floor.

“I love you more.”

“I’m sorry I’m like this,” you confessed against his chest.

But he immediately raised you from your position, to look at his, now serious, expression.

“Never apologize for something you can’t control. You say sorry all the time, peach. I love that you feel the need to say it, but you really don’t need to say it all the time. Especially in front of me. You know how much I love you, right? For being who you are?” He wiped the baby hairs away from your face. 

“You know how much I don’t care how messed up, or whatever you call it, you are, right?”

“…… Of course.”

“Then you should stop being such an amazing person. I don’t deserve you. But here I am,” he laughed, tugging you into his frame once more.

However, you still felt the need to give him the world. You still felt as though you owed him your life, he’d been your boyfriend for almost three years.

And yet you still thought that it was you who didn’t deserve him.

“Now stop crying. You know I don’t like it when you cry. Especially if it’s your damn thoughts that are eating at you.”

You love him so much.

☹ ☹ ☹

I don’t know how you look past

My stupid fucking setbacks

You said it before and you’ll say it again. You’ll say it a million more times; Jaehyun deserved more.

Sometimes, you’ll look in the crooked mirror placed in your bathroom and just think to yourself. Think about all the negatives rather than thinking about the positives. And although there are times you do think about the positives, they all end up with a wretched outcome. And then it’s negative thoughts all over again.

It’s the same routine and you’re growing sick of it. You’ve been sick of it ever since you could remember and you despise people who seem to have it easy. It just seemed as though there was no luck for you. The only luck the universe brought to you was Jaehyun. There are times, though, where you wished you never met him. He was a goddamn CEO and you were a low-class citizen. None of it just made sense.

But you loved him. It just hurts to deal with your true emotions and stow them away from your lover; because you never wanted him to watch what you were going through. Even the thought of it made you want to vomit.

Trauma just came natural to you, apparently. And you absolutely hated it. You just wished you were different, then maybe you wouldn’t feel so guilty about dating Jaehyun. Then he would truly be proud of who you are.

He was already proud of you, though. And he’s told you this a billion times. Your brain just makes you believe that he’s saying it out of pity. He’s only saying it because you’re his girlfriend. 

And the cycle continues.

—

You were spending the next couple of days at Jaehyun’s house. It was obvious he didn’t like your lifestyle and wished for you to live with him. You could never bring yourself to do it though; to always rely on him for everything that you do. You were fully aware of what you could and could not do, and you didn’t need him to help you.

Which led you to silently cry away your sorrows in his bathroom. You were taking a bath, in hopes to dial down the overwhelming emotions that engulfed you. Yet here you were, with a flushed face and puffy eyes— the aftermath of a breakdown. 

It seemed as though ever since you got into a relationship with Jaehyun, your anxiety only intensified. And that resulted in the thoughts that had been burdening your mind since the day you two met. 

Fortunately, he wasn’t home to face the pointless shenanigans that go through your head. So you had enough time to pull yourself together, take your meds, and try to meditate on the balcony that was attached to his bedroom. 

The summer nights were cool enough for you to relax your mind before Jaehyun made his way home. You were working at the orphanage the whole day and you managed to pull through the entire day without a single tear, which probably led to the bathroom-breakdown fiasco. 

The crickets had been chirping and the wind was starting to blow. That was when you heard the bedroom door open. And when Jaehyun saw the slight movement of the balcony curtains, he knew you were outside doing whatever you do best. 

Quietly, the man sighed to himself, placed his work on the side desk and undid his tie. He was finally home. He was finally with you. 

Jaehyun opened the sliding door larger than what it was and joined you in sitting on the floor with his legs crossed. At first he let out a long breath and looked out toward the yard which his bedroom was facing. Then, he got tired and shifted toward you. 

That happened all in thirty seconds.

Your eyes were still closed as you breathed in. Jaehyun lovingly smiled at you and kissed the side of your head.

“I missed you today, angel,” he broke the silence. 

You opened your eyes and shifted your body to face him.

“You say that every day,” you chuckled and played with his fingers. A habit of yours that Jaehyun absolutely adored.

“And it’s always true. I can't wait for the day I get to see you every time I come home.” You felt more guilty that he had the need to say that. And you knew he meant nothing harmful, he was just a caring person and didn’t want you living the life you had. You were better off living with him.

But you joked, “You will. For the next three days. And then I’m off home.”

He groaned and layed back on the cold floor. “Don’t remind me. I want to cherish the time we have now.”

You laughed once more. He was acting as if he didn’t come to see you practically every day. Sometimes, he’ll even leave his job just to come see you at the orphanage. 

“Eyy, quit saying that. I’m still here. You come by all the time. Sometimes twice a day. You’ll get sick of me soon, I can guarantee. I don’t know how you put up with me all these years.”

Although you were (partially) joking, Jaehyun sat right up from his prior position and looked at you with his pout and furrowed brows. 

“What do you mean, peach? I could and would never get sick of seeing you. Don’t say that.” You were shocked to see him react that way.

You slightly snickered at him and said, “I was joking, love. I’m sorry,” you leaned your head closer to his and placed a little kiss on his lips, to make him sort of forgive you for saying that. 

“You better be. I don’t know what I’d do without you, peach,” he kissed back. And pecked your lips repeatedly, several times. 

The actions made you laugh out loud and slightly push him away. Jaehyun loved being the reason why there was the brightest smile on your face. So he quietly smiled as your eyes crinkled because of him.

He suggested that you two wash up. However, you already told him you bathed before he came home. And like a child, he groaned and went into the bathroom himself. But he made you promise to wait for him tomorrow. You agreed, because he was your little baby. 

As he was in the shower, you cuddled your way into his bed sheets and blanket. The lights were now dimmed and all you were doing was waiting for him to get out of the shower. Hopefully he would be able to beat the slumber that easily pulled you in. 

The warmness of the blanket, though, soothed you to sleep and Jaehyun was unable to defeat the unfortunate slumber that casted over you. It was a shame since he wanted to talk to you; ask about your day and what you did. He’d grown used to the look of your puffy eyes, and he knew you’d been crying. He knew you were having a moment the minute he stepped onto the patio. Because the only time you would sit out there was if something was bothering you.

Being the amazing person he was, left you alone, and didn’t ask about what you clearly didn’t want to talk about. He believed that you would open up to him when you were ready. You’ve already opened up to him so much, but nothing would stop him from worrying about you. 

Once he got out of the shower and towel-dried his hair, he placed the wet towel in the basket and climbed into bed next to you, immediately clinging to your fatigued figure. God, he would give you the entire world. Jaehyun turned around and shut off the lamp on his side of the bed (yours was already turned off) and hugged you against him, his breath soon evening out to match yours. 

And fast asleep he was.

—

The following morning, Jaehyun was awakened with your fingers threaded in his hair and his face squished against your chest. He managed to stretch some parts of his limbs whilst still, practically, laying on top of you. 

“Good morning, angel,” he said in his morning voice, “I’m not going into work today.”

As a CEO, you’d expect him to take care of himself (with Jaehyun being his own boss and all) but you didn’t expect him to say he wasn’t going in. Not that you minded, you’d much rather spend the day with him but Jaehyun was a hard-working man, and he rarely took days off. 

“I’m not going in for the next three days either. It’s been a while since I took a day or two off.”

“Yeah, but you’re taking four days off, including today. Are you sure you want to do that?”

He was taken aback for a moment. Did you not want to spend time with him anymore?

“There’s nothing wrong with me taking four days off. You appreciate it, no?” He said in the littlest voice which instantly made you regret what you said.

“No, no, no. Oh, I’m sorry my love, I didn’t mean to make you upset. It’s just that you’re so busy with work and it’s just me so you don’t have to-” you rambled.

“And that’s where I’m gonna stop you. You know how much you mean to me, so of course I’m gonna take these days off to spend as much time with you as I can. The company's getting a little busier with a new launch around the corner but I’m sure they’ll be able to survive without me for a few days,” he retaliated.

You sighed, still feeling like an asshole for wording the sentence the way you did. God, could you do anything to make him happy? It felt as though everything you said and everything you did could never satisfy him. Of course, those were just your thoughts.

Jaehyun was happy that you cared about his job, but what he wanted you to realize the most is how much he wanted to be with you. Whatever it was, spending time with you is the best remedy he could ever ask for. 

Just why is he never sick of you and your words? You’re sure he would be with how rude you, unintentionally, were to him. 

☹ ☹ ☹

When you opened up the door

You let me in when you should have your guard up

Thinking back to the time you finally let Jaehyun crawl through your walls— when he’d let down his walls way before you— the constant feeling of regret and pain constantly filled you. Whether or not the glass was half-full or half-empty, it was always just half. There was never a certain hundred percent yet Jaehyun took his time in letting you trust him as Jeong Yoon Oh. 

Thinking back to the time you first met Jaehyun himself, he somehow couldn’t process the red-flag you were oh-so not afraid to show while you were inebriated. He thought you were cute, and the words you were spilling from your mouth, conscious or not, made him feel sort of protective over you. And he didn’t even know you.

It was about ten a.m. when the two of you got out of bed. Ever since the conversation earlier, the air has just been tense. At least for you. You’re sure Jaehyun probably hadn’t felt anything but your brain was constantly playing tricks on you, and this could be one of them.

Your lover is in the bathroom now, as you’re sitting on the bed staring into space with your thoughts locked into your brain. You should apologize. Of course, you want him to stay home with you, but he plays an important role in the economy and in his industry that you can’t help but feel bad for keeping him away from what he loves doing most.

Resting against the headboard, you turn your head toward the bathroom door that was being opened. He walks through and sits back in his spot next to you, although his body is fully facing yours.

“I’m sorry about earlier. I just… I don’t want to keep you here if you have a lot to prepare for your launch,” you sighed and rubbed your eyes.

He laughed, but the feeling of hurt lingered a bit in his eyes as he held the utmost respect to you. “You don’t have to apologize, my love. It’s completely okay. And if they need help, they have my number and it’ll all get fixed with a simple phone call, alright?” He used his right hand to cup your face, rubbing the pad of his thumb against the surface of your cheeks. 

You bit your lip in hesitation but you stopped when Jaehyun leaned down and kissed away the bad habit he always noticed you had. 

“Let’s make breakfast, yeah?” He whispered against your lips, giving you the biggest puppy eyes ever. You laughed and kissed him one more time before going into the bathroom to get ready for whatever the day was going to bring. 

—

Breakfast was absolutely lovely. As it always is whenever you’re with Jaehyun. But for some reason, this morning’s just hit so different.

Today, though, you planned on going to the orphanage just as a surprise visit. Truly, it was your home. Your second home (if you considered Jaehyun.) 

“Well, I was planning on getting goodie bags for the kids but… I don’t think I’m gonna. We can just spend the day there,” you were telling him all the things you wanted to do today and the things you wanted to do for the kids there but you were having trouble deciding what to actually do.

“Nah, we can go to the grocery and buy them goodies,” he abruptly said as if it was no problem. Realistically there was no problem. Except you. 

“But-”

“No buts. I haven’t seen them in a while, so just consider it a gift from me. Now, let’s finish our food and get some snacks for the kiddos,” he put his plate in the sink as you sighed in adoration (and maybe a little in guilt.)

Grocery shopping with Jaehyun was like grocery shopping with a child. And it was good, because he picked out snacks he thought the children would like, as well as treat bags to put them in. He was a child at heart although he portrayed a stoic and successful CEO.

The two of you sat in his car for an hour in the Warm Hearts Orphanage parking lot packing juices and snacks and candy into the bags before finally walking through the front door. 

One of the staff members had seen you and happily greeted the two of you as you walked into the main entrance to the room the kids spent the most. Upon your arrival, all of the children shouted in happiness, greeting you with hugs and questions of the bags that were placed in a cardboard box that Jaehyun was holding.

Giving them out and spending time with them truly warmed your heart as they played the whole day long with Jaehyun. 

He was so fond of children and your entire being melts with the sight of him playing with them and catching them up on his launch. 

Something about it was heartwarming yet bittersweet. 

You don’t know how long you could last anymore.

☹ ☹ ☹

What a painful back and forth, oh

Today was just not a good day. For you and for Jaehyun. He called you in the morning and said he was going to visit you at your apartment when he was done in the office. 

Only problem was, it was twelve in the morning when he walked through the door with the extra key you gave him. Your apartment was quiet, excluding the yelling from the thin walls of whichever neighbor. 

For the first time since he’s met you, this was the first time he’d actually noticed every little detail about your apartment. From the stained walls to the crack in your window. He felt like he wanted to cry. Jaehyun didn’t want you living like this anymore, that was the truth. And he knew you worked two jobs before committing to the orphanage. He also knew you were never able to pursue college. No amount of scholarships you were given could afford the ungodly university tuition.

And just as he was about to suck up the water forming in his eyes, you walked out of your room, fully awake. You stopped and called out his name. But the ringing in his ears only got louder. And soon he broke down into tears.

You were completely shocked. It was midnight and you didn’t think he would come over because it was so late. But now he’s here, and you don’t know how long he has been standing there, breaking down right in front of you.

“Hey, hey, hey. What’s wrong, angel?” you held him in your grasp as his tears kept coming down.

“Why are you crying? Please tell me, my love,” you pleaded, voice cracking. In the three years you’d known Jaehyun, he was never one to cry. Not one tear. He wouldn’t ever tear up either. So seeing him like this, vulnerable, was both shocking as it is confusing. 

“I just…” he sobbed, “I just love you so much. Please don’t ever leave me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” To you, he wasn’t making much sense but he was still valid to have these thoughts. Some people have their off days and you guessed this was his.

“Of course not, Yoon Oh.” He cried harder, somehow pulling you even closer than before, his head still hiding in the shadows of your neck.

Moments passed by before he finally lifted his head up. He looked so ethereal though he was covered in tears and the image in front of you made you want to cry yourself. 

“You’re okay. I’m right here,” you cupped his face with both of your hands, wiping away the tears on his cheek with your thumbs. He does the same to you, although you’re not crying.

“I want you with me forever,” he whispered, searching through your eyes as if he doesn’t know you like the back of his hand.

“I’ll be here.”

You don’t know if you’re lying to him with the response. But only time can tell whether the guilt forever residing in your heart gets the best of you and inevitably, to the best of him. But he’ll get over it right? He’s Jeong Jaehyun after all.

—

You’re now laying side by side on your bed. He is being cradled in your arms as he continues to calm down in the drowsiness of the late hours of the night.

“I’m sorry about breaking down earlier. I just… I don’t know, I just felt super overwhelmed all of a sudden I guess,” he lifted his head up to look at your moonlit face.

You shook your head and stroked his hair. “Don’t apologize. You deal with me all the time,” you dryly chuckled.

“Because I know what you go through… But thank you,” he rubbed your back.

“For what?”

“For being there for me when I need you most. I really appreciate it…” he trailed off for a moment, “I really appreciate you.”

“Please…” he continued, “Come live with me.” 

You don’t know if it was sympathy, pity, pure love, or all of the above. But Jaehyun was very much aware that he could treat you like a queen. Which he already does, and that makes you all the more hesitant.

“You know that-” you’re cut off.

“I know. I know you refuse to but please. You’re my entire world, Y/n. I can’t even explain to you in words how much you and your entire existence means to me,” he’s desperate now. So desperate to finally have all of you. So, so desperate to watch you flourish into the beautiful bouquet he knows you are.

You sigh and continue to wrap your arms around his broad shoulders. “I’ll think about it.”

But the both of you knew the true meaning behind those words. Yet neither of you can say a word.

☹ ☹ ☹

It’s hard to ignore all of my problems

You couldn’t even count all of the imperfections and impurities that you had hiding within yourself. So much so, that you seem to project those imperfections onto the people around you. To the people that you love.

And sure, they might not notice them— ignore them, in fact— but they are clearly written out right in front of you and they don’t ever seem to go away. Which is probably why they say ‘you are your greatest enemy.’ It was true.

Yet of course, these thoughts had to swarm your mind at the grocery store. Grocery shopping, for crying out loud. With Jaehyun and with bunches of people who are too nosey to not look at you and not whisper to themselves as to why you are crying. 

With the shopping cart full, Jaehyun pulls it over to the side so as to not create traffic, and pulls you closer to him by your arms. 

He pushes the hair out of your face and leans down to see you. All of you.

“What’s wrong, my love?” He shushes you and wipes the tears off your cheeks.

This was absolutely terrible. Even the most domestic and everyday tasks were a hassle. And you felt like you were burdening Jaehyun in the busy market that only the wealthiest people had shopped at (since you were staying over Jaehyun’s again for a few days.) 

“Nothing, it’s- I’m okay,” you sucked in a breath and wiped your tears before looking up at him to meet his worried gaze.

“Are you sure?” He squinted his eyes.

You took in another breath before nodding.

“One hundred percent sure?” He patted your flyaway hairs down. You nodded again.

“I need words, angel. To make sure you’re okay. Really okay.”

“I’m okay, I promise,” you try to give him your best smile.

He only responds with the softest kiss to your forehead. 

“I need you to be with me,” he whispered against your skin.

“I am. One thousand percent. I’m okay,” you whispered back, now getting self conscious of the scene of you and Jaehyun canoodling in a grocery store on a Wednesday at eleven a.m.

He believed you, however the rest of the shopping trip went by slowly, awkwardly, and quietly.

You wished you could change the way you think. 

☹ ☹ ☹

Cause I'm no good (Ooh), you could do better (Ooh)

You should walk out, it's now or never

Ninety-nine percent of couples argue. Those statistics are completely true. No matter how often or how little, couples everywhere have their fair share of fights.

You and Jaehyun are one of those couples that rarely fight. Today, however, had not been very good to the both of you. Stress, anxiety, and more stress were eating at the both of you and now it landed you here. Just great.

“I don’t need you constantly taking care of me! I’m perfectly fine on my own!” You shouted toward him.

“Clearly you’re not if you break down every other day! I just want you to be okay,” he lets go and sits on one of the chairs in the living room. His face is hiding in his hands as he feels the anger and disappointment run through his brain.

Noticing this reaction, you sigh and furrow your eyebrows. It’s silent for a fleeting moment. “Why? You know I’ll be okay.”

You sit on the couch, opposite of the black leather chair Jaehyun is sitting in. 

“I know how much you’re hurting. And I don’t ever want you to feel those terrible feelings ever again. I want to be here for you and I want you to know that I want to be here for you. Can't you understand?”

It isn’t too much after he let out those words that you feel the tears fill up the sockets of your eyes and the void of the room. The walls that had now captured the two lovers screaming at each other now hear the abundant silence between them.

“I can't give you anything. You do so much for me and I’m just here.”

“I don’t care. No materialistic thing could ever compare to you just being here with me.” He gets up and sits next to you, making sure you know he’s with you the entire way.

“But it’s not enough.”

“Yes it is, Y/n. And I don't know what else to say to get through that thick head of yours. I love you for being you. And I love you for accepting me for who I am, not who I need to be. I don't need you to offer me anything besides your love.”

“That's the thing. I can only offer you my love.”

“I don’t care! Y/n, you need to realize how much you affect me. And I can't let you go around saying those words because they hurt me. It genuinely hurts me to hear those words.”

“…. I'm sorry.”

“Y/n, you truly don’t know how much you help those around you?”

It was silent for a moment.

“You work in a damn orphanage, for crying out loud! For fun. And it just makes me appreciate you. Appreciate how much you enjoy the happiness of other people. It’s all I could ever ask for.” He wiped the tears falling from your eyes.

“Please don’t cry. I just need you to know how much I love you. Why can't you see that? Do you not love me anymore?”

With zero hesitation, you released his hand from your face and stood up, “No! Don’t say that! Of course I still love you!”

“… it’s just that…”

“Don’t even say it, Y/n.”

The gloomy night has come to an end. And yet Jaehyun will not— will never— leave you behind. 

☹ ☹ ☹

Gonna regret being too honest

Callin' it love, but this isn’t fallin'

It’s the following morning. It is truly a gloomy morning, in fact. The rain was slowly pouring, the wind was rustling against the trees, and the upcoming fog coming from the ocean was painting the neighborhood.

The minute you woke up in Jaehyun’s arms, you remembered the fight the night prior. And, God, did you feel like an absolute ass.

Could this be it? It’s been three years and yet the question still lingers. Just why? It seems as though you bring him so much pain and yet he has chosen nothing but enduring the repercussions of your wrath.

You gradually regained the strength to get up and without a minute to spare, you quietly escaped out of Jaehyun’s protective arms to make breakfast. Some sort of remedy to help heal the pain of last night's argument.  

You sat on one of the island chairs waiting for the food to cook in the oven. Slowly but surely, you were once again trapped in your thoughts. Were you being too harsh? Were you being too honest? Were you actually enough to be with the most amazing man on planet Earth? 

All of these questions were paused by the padding of feet coming into the kitchen. You look up at him, not expecting anyone else. And in his dazed glory, Jeong Yoon Oh was still the most precious human being that had ever entered your existence.

“I’m sorry,” is the first thing you’re able to say before finally crying. Crying the waves of emotions that you felt the night before yet did not physically show.

He didn’t say a single word. He didn’t have to. All he did was take you in his embrace and whispered apologies and sweet nothings into your ears. The rest of the morning went by with stuffy noses and quiet munches.

—

“I’m sorry about last night,” you apologized once again, sitting on the bed watching him get ready through the mirror.

“It’s okay. I’m sorry too. I just want you to know that you can lean on me. You’ve been able to lean on me for years now…. I didn’t mean to yell but desperate times call for desperate measures,” says Jaehyun.

“But I'm not desperate at all, you know that.”

“Yes but don’t you know I’m so desperate for you?” 

[baeyrah]

HEPL ME FIND A FIC!!!

hi guyss, i know people don't know me at all, i don't have any followers or what so ever as I'm always a reader here..

but please I'm BEGGING you guys to help me find a taeyong's fic. I read it around 2 years ago.. i think...? 🥴

the plot is, taeyong is in mafia or a gang and he's in a mission. then they got ambushed or something that the other members had to flee first. taeyong's got hurt while fleeing and ended up at y/n's house.

then she treated him ( if I'm not mistaken she's a nurse) and like he fall for her, she fall for him, and then there's smutty scene... 👀 then if one of the member (as far as i remember doyoung) called him and say the gang needs him and he left y/n for few days then he come back and reveal the truth to y/n..

then taeyong want to get married with her and give up his title as the leader of mafia/gang. and then i don't really remember what happened but at the end taeyong died because he drank poison that was meant for y/n.. 😢

pleasee help me find itt, i cried for DAYS after reading this.. I'm DESPERATE!!!

[saturnznct]

d-5; decorating the tree/house | jjh

➸ word count; 678 words

➸ alissa & amelia; aged 9, josh; aged 3

dadmas masterlist | nct masterlist

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

‘Wow!’ Amelia launches her bag onto the sofa, having just arrived home from school to see the Christmas Tree up in the living room.

‘Hey sweetheart,’ you smile, still fluffing the branches out, ‘had a good day?’

‘Alright,’ she heads over to Josh, who’s playing with some toy cards on the floor, ‘hi Joshie.’

Jaehyun and Alissa trail in behind her, Jaehyun tossing his car keys into the pot in the doorway.

‘Oh, cool!’ Alissa marvels at the scale of the tree, which goes all the way up to the ceiling.

‘We’re gonna put the lights on and decorate after dinner, ok? When it’s darker and cosy.’

The girls finish homework and play some multiplayer video games together while you prepare dinner, Jaehyun joining Josh in playing with his toy car garage. Once your dinner of kimchi fried rice is finished, the twins clear away the dishes while you and Jaehyun string up multi-coloured fairy lights across the Christmas Tree.

Christmas songs play from your speaker, and you and Jaehyun hum along, occasionally chucking when Josh starts singing and dancing.

‘Okay kids, lights are on!’ You call, and the three of them quickly gather around, already beginning to rifle through the piles of ornaments and baubles on the floor.

Alissa starts first, grabbing a Tokyo Disneyland ornament from the pile, while Amelia picks up a hanging photo frame of Jaehyun holding a newborn twin in each arm. Josh takes a little longer, the girls having put on three or four baubles each before he’s even chosen one. Jaehyun helps him loop the ribbon over the tree brach, albeit a very low branch due to his height.

‘Good job, buddy,’ Jaehyun pats the back of his head, ‘wanna choose another one?’

He toddles over to the pile once again, returning to Jaehyun with a snowflake ornament.

‘Are you going to try it yourself this time?’ Jaehyun asks, pointing to an empty branch within Josh’s reach. Josh successfully places the ornament on the tree, Jaehyun giving him similar words of praise.

You love seeing Jaehyun like this, being so sweet and caring towards your children, absentminded smile, bare face, fluffy hair, dimples and eye scrunch on full display. It makes your heart all warm and your stomach all fuzzy.

With five of you, the tree fills up with baubles from around the world, various colourful ornaments and pine scent sticks.

‘And for the final touch,’ you produce a silver star, wires intertwining inside the shape with little white lights.

‘Now, since Amelia did it last year, and Alissa the year before,’ Jaehyun says, ‘and now that our Josh is all grown up, it’s his turn to put the star on the tree this year!’

Josh giggles and claps excitedly, making grabby hands for the star.

‘It’s ok, daddy’s gonna lift you up, little man,’ Jaehyun lifts him up from under his armpits, Josh waving the star around in his chubby little hand.

‘Go on, Jaehwan-ie,’ Amelia encourages.

It takes some guidance from Jaehyun, but eventually Josh manages to slot the large ornament onto the top stalk of the tree. The rest of you clap and cheer, much to Josh’s delight, who happily laps up the attention.

The three year old then very quickly loses interest, preferring to watch cartoons on the television rather than help all of you decorate the rest of the house. Alissa volunteers to watch over him (although you suspect she likely just can’t be bothered to help anymore) while the rest of you go through hanging wreaths on doors and wrapping fairy lights and tinsel around the bannisters, as well as placing ceramic ornaments on mantlepieces and tabletops.

Later, when all of the children are in bed asleep, you and Jaehyun enjoy hot chocolates on the sofa, admiring your work.

‘Another Christmas,’ Jaehyun smiles, ‘it’s crazy. The twins will be ten this year.’

‘Josh is old enough to put the star on the tree.’

‘They’re really growing up, huh?’ Jaehyun sighs, a little sadly, ‘anyway, Merry Christmas, love. We’ve had another amazing year.’

‘Merry Christmas, Jae.’

[saeyoungchips]

[8:51 p.m] 

warnings: descriptions of being sick.

you hadn't seen jaehyun in a long time, so you were excited to finally spend some time with him during the dinner you both planned.

but things couldn't go as contemplated, because this morning you woke up to find yourself sweating with a hot body.

you felt awful, not only from the throbbing pain in your head but also because of the plans you had to cancel. you had lost your appetite, so what was the point? leaving behind the fact that you couldn't bring yourself to get out of bed.

you spent almost the entire day sleeping, losing track of time, and only waking up because your phone kept ringing.

"hello?" you answered the call in a tired voice without really paying attention to the caller id.

"i'm outside." you heard the only voice on the phone that could make you feel better.

with clumsy steps, you made it to the door and opened it only to find jaehyun on the other side, who had brought with him a couple of bags from the grocery store and pharmacy.

"what are you doing here?" you asked him because you weren't expecting to see him in your apartment, especially after you explicitly told him to stay away in case he caught a cold as well.

"i didn't want you to be alone," jaehyun admitted with a little smile.

it wasn't until he came into your place that you finally took proper care of your cold; thanks to him, you ate a bit of food and took enough pills to make you feel better. your fever wasn't as high as it was in the morning, but you still felt quite uncomfortable, so, at jaehyun's suggestion, you cuddled next to him on the couch with a blanket around your body.

as you heard jaehyun's soft voice talk about his week, you let yourself close your eyes and let the sound of his voice embrace you. the warmth of his touch made you feel the most at ease you'd felt all day, which made you realize how much of a safe haven he was for you. you were grateful that your paths crossed and allowed you to meet.

"jaehyun," you said, interrupting what he was saying to you.

"yes?"

"i love you," you said as you felt your cheeks get hot, but not from the fever. "thanks for taking care of me."

"i love you, too," he replied, pressing a loving kiss against your forehead.

[3raaaachachacha]

11:22 pm 

Seo Johnny x female reader / 623 words / fluff / suggestive

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, heated make out, friends to lovers

Disclaimer: contains 18+ content; minors do not interact

⊱ ──────────────────────── ⊰

You had known Johnny for quite a few years now. Never thinking of him as any more than, well, Johnny. The man was the funniest person you’d ever met and your best friend. He, of course, was still a guy, and a handsome one at that, yet the thought of wanting him never passed your mind. Until the two of you were tipsy off beer and soju at your friend’s house to celebrate their birthday. The night was still young, yet everyone was already drunk. You sat next to Johnny as he conversed with your friends. He was always more outgoing than you were. 

You shivered, something that happened whenever you drank. It seemed your body temperature couldn’t quite process alcohol as fast as others, making your body cold. Johnny noticed as he pulled you into his side, his arm wrapped around your waist, “Cold already? You’ve only had a few shots.”

You chuckled out of embarrassment. It wasn’t that you were drunk already, you just were cold. A small blush adored your cheeks, “Yeah, leave me alone J. You know how I get when I drink.”

He pulled you closer to him as he now faced you, “I know how you love to snuggle with me when you drink. And how cute you get when you get all flustered like this,” He chuckled to himself, “Is that blush all for me?”

You pouted slightly, smacking his chest, “If you don’t stop making fun of me Seo, I swear to god-”

“What? What are you gonna do?” He taunted, moving closer to your face, only inches away now.

You could feel your heart beginning to race. Why was it racing? This had never happened before. Was it because you hadn’t been touched by a man in so long? Was it because Johnny was in fact handsome? Or the new long locks he rocked, making his jawline seem sharper?

“It’s cute when you try and act all big and tough,” He winked at you, moving a piece of hair to put behind your ear as his eyes stayed glued to you as if you were a prey he was stalking, “Stop giving me that look.”

“What look?” You asked, innocently, not realizing just how intensely you were staring at him, leaning closer as if on cue.

“Like you want me to kiss you,” He said with features softening as if he knew the answer already to his own statement. 

Your eyes went big, yet not being able to break your glare, “What if I want you to?” You couldn’t stop yourself before the words slipped out of your mouth.

Johnny scoffed to himself with a smirk written on his pretty mouth, “Follow me,” He said, extending a hand for you to take as you listened, following him up the stairs and into your friend’s guest room.

Just as the door shut, his lips were on yours. You swore your heart was about to pop out of your chest from how hard it was beating. Your hands instinctively wrapped around his neck, drawing him closer to you, and intensifying the kiss. His hands wrapped around your waist, pulling you into his tone chest. The kiss was slow at first and soon heated and passionate as if this was way overdue for the both of you. You felt your back hit the cool wall as his warm body pressed against you, feeling something hard against your hip.

Your eyes went wide as the two of you pulled away to catch your breath, foreheads pressed against one another, “Seems like we waited a bit too long to do that, don’t you think?”

You giggled at his comment, “Let’s not wait any longer. It’s only torturing us both.”  

⊱ ──────────────────────── ⊰

- Admin 🦋

[mystverse]

PERFECT | J.JH

Pairing : jaehyun × afab reader

Genre : romance (fluff), hogwarts au, quidditch au

Warning : none

Song : Perfect by One Direction

Your mom always said that it takes three meetings to fall in love with someone, and sadly, your mom was always right.

❝Who is he? That dimpled one❞ you pop a toffee into your mouth, walking with your cousin, as you look at group of boys goofing around, in the middle of Diagon alley. The dimpled male is laughing along, throwing in witty comments now and then. He is absolutely stunning. You'll give him that. He's got everything; height, physique, everything. No one's got their robes on, so you assume that everyone are either Ravenclaws or Hufflepuffs; most are your cousin's friends, and you know them. Sicheng has brought a lot of his friends home; though he says he would never invite his close friend. 

❝That's Yoonoh, a Slytherin❞ Sicheng follows the gang into Flourish and Blotts, taking the parchment from his bag. You blink, unexpected; that was really unexpected of himㅡ to have Slytherin as his friend. 

❝Interesting. A Slytherin hanging out Ravenclaws. Very interesting❞ you silently walk away to get your books. This is going to be tough, you say to yourself, seeing the crowd inside. You roll up the long sleeves of what the muggles call a crop top, which is very comfortable by the way, and begin to search for the books. It takes almost thirty minutes for you to get all the books except one, Spellmen's Syllabary.

The manager, a Brit with an obvious accent, had told you that the book was out of stock; and so you'd have to ask Sicheng if he has a copy, and final stop is Quality Quidditch Supplies, you'll have a new broomstick soon, a Comet Two Ninety hopefully, it's still better than a Silver Arrow, ❝Enough day-dreaming, Huang. Let's go❞ 

❝Jeez Myoui, chill out❞ Mina laughs at your way of speaking. Maybe spending the vacation with Mark Lee was a bad idea, and you get it now: his Canadian accent is stuck with you, but you enjoyed the vacation anyway. 

❝Yo, did you take Ancient runes in your third year?❞

❝Nah, it's a pain in the ass, dude. Too many translations, and I do enough already❞ you hum, following her to your cousin waiting for you outside. After a minute or so, Mina speaks again, ❝Yoonoh might have it❞ you near the group of rowdy boys, well, girls as well.

❝The Slytherin?❞ a positive hum as her answer.

❝Is he a Pureblood?❞ a positive hum again. Shit, I don't speak pureblood, though. You curse internally.

❝He is easy to speak with, and you were speaking out loud❞ Mina laughs, dragging you into the gang. You already feel like a dwarf among the wizards standing around you; maybe you should have taken the P.E. classes in your muggle school seriously.

❝Y'all shh. Huang has something to askㅡ❞ Mina starts, and the boisterous noise goes down slowly, ❝ㅡto Yoonoh❞ Sicheng's eyes widen comically, while Yoonoh is, well just standing there; looking at you curiously with his hands shoved into his pockets.

❝Um, do you perhaps have a copy of Spellmen's Syllabary?❞ and there is a glint of a smile in his lips, so faint that you wouldn't notice it, ❝I do. You can come with me and get it❞ your head slowly turns to Sicheng, ❝I hope you trust me with your cousin❞ Melodic. Even the pop singers Mark introduced will go poof in front of his voice.

❝I trust you wholeheartedly, Yoonoh. It's her that I don't trust❞ Almost all laugh at that, and you roll your eyes.

The trip to Yoonoh's manor was pretty fun, considering he invited everyone in the gang to stay over. And yes, you got his copy of Spellmen's Syllabary, a very neatly bound copy to be precise, and you expected the pages as perfect as well but no, surprisingly there's a lot of corrections, notes added into each page and even some scribbles here and there; And few love notes, someone's been getting love notes. You chuckle, placing them back at the last few pages; you'd return it soon anyway.

The second meet was at the start of Christmas holidays; everyone was packing to go spend the holidays with their family but unfortunately you couldn't, because of the Quidditch practices, since you were new to the team you had extra practice hours.

You were in the astronomy tower, recalling your notes, pacing around quietly in the darkness. ❝Lumos❞ you hear his voice, and his footsteps approaching you, ❝Y/N...? You aren't going home?❞

You shake your head, ❝Practice❞ you mumble. Maybe you should have taken Mina's words into your brain. Ancient Runes and Arithmancy, both electives you chose, are pain in the ass. You lean against the railing, the cold wind whirls around. You see him next to you, staring at the Black Lake.

❝You aren't going home?❞ You ask, ruining the comfortable silence. He looks at you for a second and sighs, ❝I should❞ he looks at your face, eyes flitting around, admiring your face, you could guess, ❝But you don't want to?❞ you add; he nods, ❝I've grown attached to this place❞

❝How are you keeping up with Ancient Runes and Arithmancy, I suppose?❞

❝Both are eating up my head. I'll go bald soon if I keep learning❞ he chuckles at your answer, and a silence engulfs the tower, except for the soft chirping of the sparrows. The sun sets into the lake, and the pink tint of the sky reflects on the water.

❝I get it, but don't go bald, though. I like your curls❞ It takes a full minute for him to respond, but there's a pink hue coloring your cheeks. The bell goes off, after a few silent minutes, and he whistles, and his owl brings his Nimbus 2001; he mounts his broomstick, floating on the mid air above the water, ❝I have like 30 minutes. Do you want to go for a ride?❞ the wind is harsh, but he's steady, almost moving with the wind swiftly.

❝Um well but we shouldn't, you know, rules and all❞ you stutter, yet getting closer to the railing, but he chuckles, ❝Come on a goody two shoes, don't spoil the thrill❞ he extends his hand: you stand on the railing, ❝Thrill?❞ you ask a slight hint of a smirk on your lips, ❝Say Jeong Yoonoh, in case I fall from this railingㅡ❞ you raise your left leg, balancing yourself on the other, ❝ㅡ will you be able to save me?❞

His lips curl into a smirk, ❝If you trust me, try❞ he flies away from the railing; it's almost like he's waiting for you to jump, just to know that you trust him with your life. You take a step back, not hesitation, but to taunt him; his face falls for a second, and you don't like it.

You dive into the air, letting yourself split the wind. The Lake shines silver in the moonlight; it's feels like you can touch it if you extend your arm but a warm arm wrapping around your waist pulls you back from the thought, ❝Caught you❞ he whispers in your ear, and places you in his broom, arm still around your waist, torso pressed onto your back.

It's almost the end of the year, when you got to talk with Yoonoh for the third time. It's always smiles and waves, as you prance around with your housemates, very friendly you'll say. But this time, the circumstance is anything but friendly; the year-end Quidditch grand finale: Slytherins vs. Ravenclaws, more like Huang Y/N, Ravenclaw's ace beater vs. Jeong Yoonoh, Slytherin's sly seeker.

The two teams stand facing each other; this is going to be a fierce match you could tell, from the way Yoonoh's smirks, ❝Fancy seeing you without your books, Huang❞ his words lack the softness, replaced with a taunting smirk. You know it; he is freaking confident that he would win.

❝Fancy seeing you without your sidekicks, Jeong. Shouldn't you be reading love notes from your admirers?❞

The whistle goes off in the next second. The game starts. As you guessed, it is indeed fierce. Both the houses shoot the Quaffle into the hoops. At the end of 45 minutes, the golden snitch is still in the air, with the scores in a tie.

Yoonoh soars higher than everyone, trying to locate the snitch. You follow him close, aiming the bludger to his broomstick. You hit the bludger to him, and he dodges it with a snicker, ❝Trouble aiming, Huang❞ he turns towards your direction, sleek and sharp. The snitch floats around you, and so the Bludger follows. Yoonoh flies to you in the same speed, without noticing the Bludger, ❝Yoonoh, duck down❞ you shout, racing in front of him to hit the ball, away from him.

The crowd goes silent, even the players and the referee, pause for a second, ❝Lee , you are a Slytherin❞ Donghyuck blinks, giving a confused look, ❝Try not knocking Yoonoh off his broom next time❞ you roll your eyes, soaring away from him and everything sinks in. You just saved your opponent from a bludger, you really are stupid, it seems.

❝Slytherin scores! 40 to 30! Yoonoh is following the snitch in his brand new Nimbus 2001, very sleek, must say. Will he beㅡ Yes, sorry, professor. 40 to 30, Quaffle in possession of Ravenclaws❞

You keep aiming the bludgers to the Chasers, the Kims knocking them off their brooms. Trusting that Jisung would take care of Yoonoh, you focus on the game.

Someone must have jinxed it. The golden snitch, it keeps coming back to you, and as always, Yoonoh follows, but this time Ravenclaw's seeker is here.

❝Finally, Xiao❞ you sigh, speeding up the pace towards him, and the snitch floats around you. Caging the snitch but you didn't actually catch it, Dejun is flashing, straight at you but he is faster; Yoonoh, he bolts out of nowhere and pulls you aside by waist, dodging that devil of a bludger and catches the golden snitch.

Slytherin roar in victory; green confetti is thrown around, and the Slytherin flag is conjured up in the cerulean sky. You take a second to rewind; Slytherin has won the Quidditch cup. Yoonoh has saved you from a bludger, just like you diㅡ there's a pair of soft lips pressing on your cheek, ❝Thank you❞ Whispery deep voice of him, Yoonoh; he just kissed your cheek in front of everyonㅡ ❝Those love notes you saw, I wrote them for you❞ this time it was you, pressing your lips to his. The applause and cheers fade into nothing when his lips glide along yours.

It's a double celebration, anyway.

: MYST

[hannie-dul-set]

— arranged by: member (eldest to youngest) | date (latest to oldest) | type (full-length to drabbles to blurbs) i don’t recommend reading my older works because they’re terrible. still putting them on here for the sake of bookkeeping | last updated: 23.12.18 

BLUE HYDRANGEAS. wherein this time, it’s your breath that gets taken away and not the other way around.

PAIRING. lee taeyong x reader. GENRE. romance, humor, light angst, and of course the overall theme of the event  — dumbassery (this time, by y/n), florist! taeyong, contract killer! reader. WARNINGS. murder, death i mean lol, violence, swearing, mentions of blood, knives, & guns. WORD COUNT. 2.2k.

MISSED TIMINGS. drabble game; “do i look like i’ve moved on?”

PAIRING. lee taeyong x reader. GENRE. post breakup! au, angst. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 887.

CAUGHT RED HANDED. all you wanted to do was take a picture of the handsome law student during your train ride home. you did not expect things to end up like this.

PAIRING. kim doyoung x reader. GENRE. fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 804.

A FOOL’S GAME. were you the fool for being blind to his intentions? or was it he who forgot what his intentions were in the first place?

PAIRING. jung jaehyun x reader. GENRE. royal! au, drama, romance, angst, slight comedy. WARNINGS. swearing, mentions of death. WORD COUNT. 27.4k.

CONTRARIETY & CONFLUENCE. there was not an instance in your life where your judgement was proven to be mistaken— especially with regards to infatuations outside of your own. after an unpredicted introduction with a far too remarkable farm boy, you took it upon yourself to find a suitable match for him, not realizing that perhaps this time; your usual correct judgements might have been incorrect.

PAIRING. jung jaehyun x reader. GENRE. emma! au, matchmaking! au, strangers to lovers! au, slowburn, period romance, humor, one suggestive scene, very very tiny angst. WARNINGS. implied and borderline smut. WORD COUNT. 16.9k.

[doctor! au] [richkid! au] [sugardaddy! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse]

PUT A FINGER DOWN. wherein mark lee finds you drunk for the first time and promises to himself that he should make sure that you never get wasted ever again.

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. college! au, humor, fluff, suggestive, drunken mistakes that would probably make you cry in real life. WARNINGS. swearing, alcohol consumption, mature content (sexual & explicit jokes about fingers and — u get the gist) please read at your own discretion. WORD COUNT. 1.6k.

BIBINGKA. legend says that if you finish all nine night masses of simbang gabi, your wish will be granted. mark only hopes that it’s actually true because that’s his last chance in getting you to notice him (but wait— shouldn’t his wish only come true after the nine days?)

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. christmas! au, crush! au, lots of fluff, mark is a piner, mark is also very awkward, some filipino references and customs. WARNINGS. swearing, religious themes. WORD COUNT. 6.9k.

HOW TO GET THE GUY. drabble game; “why haven’t you kissed me yet?”

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. college! au, friends to lovers! au, fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.2k.

IS IT BECAUSE YOU’RE ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT ME? video call with your best friend, mark lee.

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. long distance (not so relationship) relationship, mutual pining, angsty themes. WARNINGS. none. WORD COUNT. 428.

[hotsauce! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse] [coworkers! au] 

DO YOU WANT ME (DEAD)? murder and making out.

PAIRING. huang renjun x reader. GENRE. high school! au, suggestive. WARNINGS. attempted murder, mentions of blood and self injury, veryy descriptive kissing, mc has a few screws lost, swearing, depictions of unstable behavior. WORD COUNT. 1.8k.

[friends to lovers! au] [skater! au] [skater! au] [tough love! au] [mermaid! au] [tutor! au]

I (HAVE/HAD) A CRUSH ON YOU. running into a past crush at your best friend’s birthday party wouldn’t have been so bad if he wasn’t— well— all that.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader GENRE. crush! jeno, college! au, rom-com, mildly suggestive moments. WARNINGS. swearing, smoking, mentions of dicks and balls (sorry), an awful amount of men and boys being boys. WORD COUNT. 5.8k

I’LL TAKE YOUR WORD FOR IT AND NO ONE ELSE’S. maybe snooping through your friend’s phone wasn’t that much of a good idea. or maybe it was. either way, you didn’t regret it.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader. GENRE. friends to something, fluff, lots of bickering. WARNINGS. swearing, invasion of privacy(?) lmao. WORD COUNT. 2.1k.

IT’S FOR YOU. all it took was the heavy rainfall from the sky to clear up your misunderstandings.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader. GENRE. e2l (sort of), fluff. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.5k.

[ceo! au] [spacecore! aesthetic] [hotsauce! au] [bf discourse]

KATHANG ISIP. musings of the mind and heart are always dangerous— it’s easy to get carried away and get lost in your made up scenarios, rose colored wishes, and fleeting daydreams of what you thought would be. that is until reality hits you like the crashing of an ocean’s waves.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. roommates! au, college! au, brief roadtrip! au, angst, fluff, humor. also let’s pretend hyuck cannot drive and that his hometown is elsewhere for the sake of plot, thanks. WARNINGS. swearing, alcohol consumption, one descriptive kissing scene, lots and lots of overthinking. WORD COUNT. 19.8k

DATING 101. drabble game; “you’re not very intimidating”.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. highschool! au, fluff, slight suggestive, slight humore, wannabe badboy! haechan. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 678.

SHAMELESS. drabble game; “did you just— did you just kiss me?” “yeah” “do it again”.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. enemies! au, fluff, humor, co-worker! haechan. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 997.

[grunge! aesthetic] [lipstick! au] [bf discourse]

CAN’T HANDLE THIS. how are you supposed to explain that you and na jaemin started dating just to prove each other wrong and ended up catching feelings.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. strangers to lovers, college! au, matchmaking! au, yet another richkid! au, jaemin is an asshole again, romance, humor. WARNINGS. excessive swearing, a near death experience, drinking and smoking, more than a handful of illegal shit, mentions of vomit, blood, violence, too much sexual tension it’s unhealthy, again jaemin is kind of a dick but he’s an attractive dick, jaemin also likes it when you tell him his personality is trash. WORD COUNT. 16k.

IT TAKES FOUR YEARS TO GROW A PEACH TREE. humans are fickle in nature— it takes a great deal of patience, fortitude, and devotion to have a heart that remains constant. that or having an absolute tolerance for all pain and torment that comes in exchange.

so when you are once again met by the ex-boyfriend that you’ve desperately avoided for four years after tearing up his heart, it becomes a test of how much you can endure, and how much more you’re willing to endure after realizing that you’re still in love with him when his love has already been weathered down.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader GENRE. exes to lovers! au, college! au, romance, angst, fluff, humor, hurt/comfort, SLOW AS FUCK BURN, pining, lots of pushing and pulling, the “its always been you” trope, a modern retelling-ish of jane austen’s persuasion. WARNINGS. swearing, heartbreak, alcohol consumption, parental pressure, stress and anxiety, one scene with a nosebleed, jaemin is kind of a dick in the beginning, mentions of hospitals, one scene with a creep, one makeout scene, ghosting, breakup, a lot of me projecting. WORD COUNT. currently 54k.

ARAW-ARAW. mahiwaga— someone or something that you’ll choose every single day no matter the circumstance. and for you, that was na jaemin. even if time decides to set you apart.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. childhood friends to lovers! au, college! au, romance, slow-ish burn, fluff, humor, tiny angst, biology major jaemin and art major mc HEHE. WARNINGS. excessive swearing, insecurities, some sex jokes LMAO, i project a lot in this i’m sorry JSFJG. WORD COUNT. 14.5k.

US, AGAIN. they say history repeats itself, but you’d like to disagree. you had to disagree. history changes, even if you had to force it. but when all your attempts to twist fate were met by nothing but the flashing recurrences of the past, what were you supposed to do?

or, wherein you try everything in your power to have nothing to do with na jaemin, but na jaemin wants nothing but you.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. college! au, historical! au, soulmate! au, past lives, forbidden love stuff, reincarnation, romance, drama, humor, angst, fluff, looots of flashbacks, this is an entire kdrama, very loosely inspired by the webtoon “see you in my 19th life”. WARNINGS. (updated as the series goes on) character death/s, night terrors, murder, terminal illness, hospital mentions, gun mentions, inaccurate depictions of the joseon era for the sake of plot lmao. WORD COUNT. currently 4.9k.

TOP OF THE WORLD. things had always been the same in the world of na jaemin— him sitting on a throne above everyone else. that was the natural order. but the world as jaemin knew it began to shake after a few fated encounters with someone at the bottom of the food chain.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. private school! au, one sided e2l lmao, a dash of fake dating, romance, heavily suggestive themes, lots and lots of sexual tension and power dynamics. WARNINGS. bullying (lots of it), public humiliation, mildly nsfw, borderline smut, implied smut, swearing, jaemin being a literal asshole. WORD COUNT. 15.6k.

HOSTILITY. making out with the person you hate the most.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. suggestive, stageplay! au. WARNINGS. making out, swearing, reader tells jaem to k himself, reader spits on jaem’s face and he does something…questionable. WORD COUNT. 438.

DO IT AGAIN. maybe you should have paid more attention to your boyfriend. he isn’t always petty, but he has his limits.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. fluff, established relationship! au. WARNINGS. alcohol consumption, kissing. WORD COUNT. 576.

DON’T THINK, JUST DO. an overthinker, a piece of advice, a sudden confession, and a subtle meltdown.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. high school! au, f2l, fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.6k.

WHAT BEST FRIENDS DO. drabble game; “i need a hug”.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. high school! au, maybe secret relationship! au, fluff, light humor. WARNINGS. swearing, mentions of food. WORD COUNT. 988.

[secret agents! au] [richkid! au] [boyfriend! au] [neighbor! au] [spiderman! au] [softcore! aesthetic] [racer! au] [vampire! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse] [best friends to lovers! au] [reincarnation! au]

[johnny royal! au] [yuta punk! aesthetic] [yuta bf discourse] [kun richkid! au] [jungwoo royalcore! aesthetic] [jisung bf discourse]

NCT & WAYV MASTERLIST. © hannie-dul-set.

[outro-jo]

yellow

pairing: jung jaehyun x reader

type: blurb

summary: jaehyun needed a little tlc and knew just where to go

warnings: literally none this is pure fluff bc i love jaehyun sm

song inspo

masterlist | info

the door opened and shut, echoing throughout the small apartment. it was all jaehyun could do just to shuffle across the floor. his bag and shoes had been discarded at the door and his tired body ached. all he wanted to do was crawl into bed and pass out. with a light push on the door it swung all the way open, making a small noise as it hit the wall, gaining your attention.

“hi, baby.” you pouted at his worn state as he collapsed on top of you, careful not to hurt you though.

you set your phone on the bedside table and laced your fingers through his hair, weaving them in and out of the strands. jaehyun buried his face into your soft stomach and wrapped his arms around you as he tried to make himself comfortable on the bed. 

“rough day, my love?” you asked him softly.

he nodded against you and finally went limp. the empathy you felt for him ached in your chest. though you know he loves his job and wouldn’t trade it for the world, it does come with its downsides. you wished so badly to take away his pain and exhaustion but for now rubbing his head and letting him rest on you would have to do…for now. 

he looked up at you pleadingly, “baby, will you sing to me?”

you let out a laugh, “babe, you’re the singer. not me.”

“i know but i love your voice. it’s so soft and pretty. it relaxes me. please!” jaehyun pokes his lips out at you in a pout, knowing you can’t resist.

“ugh, fine but don’t complain when the neighbors dogs start barking.” you rolled your eyes at him.

beneath you, jaehyun shifted to make himself more comfortable as you sunk down to a laying position and reached over to turn off the bedside lamp. darkness enveloped the room save for the moonlight coming through the window. your voice was low and timid at first as you started to sing your song. the song that jaehyun said reminded him of you. the song he keeps on repeat when he’s away on tour and missing you. he says it’s how he feels about you, that you’re his yellow. it was the song you remember your parents dancing to in the kitchen when you were little. you can still hear your dad singing along with the little radio in the windowsill. this song was permanently ingrained in your memory and seemed to follow you throughout your life and despite jaehyun saying it was for you, you felt it was more for him. 

even in the dark and with his face against your torso, you could feel jaehyun’s smile. his eyes had closed and you could feel his breathing slowing as your voice and repetitive movements on his head lulled him to sleep. doing what he loved may drain him on a daily basis but it didn’t matter much when he had you to replenish him. you were everything he needed to be restored again like the sun. his yellow.

[thewonandonly]

01:57 — if you were my little girl, i'd do whatever i could do, i'd run away and hide with you l daddy issues by the neighbourhood

here's a little snippet to a fic im writing 🫣 erm, i hope you enjoy!

jaehyun leaned his arm on the wall, right above your head. his face was close enough to see the details. he smelt good - like rose and ember; so much so it was intoxicating. his dimples and his eyes as he smiled, the faint stubble along his chin and upper lip. sculpted from marble by michelangelo himself.

the faint smell of alcohol from his red solo cup and a puddle of the spilled liquor from a drunk attendee swirled around the both of you.

"don't you have a game tomorrow?" you spoke into his ear over the music, feeling your heart flutter as he turned his head slightly so you didn't have to move much.

he chuckled, shrugging, "it's kinda tradition to visit before a game." he responded, his lips gently brushing against your cheek as he spoke.

you nodded as he moved back to his position, smiling at him, "so, do you always linger around the university or...?"

"no," he shook his head, "but, i mean, if i got to find someone as beautiful as you, maybe it's not a bad idea."

someone nudged behind him, causing him to straighten up with his chest hitting your own. he had you pressed flush against the wall, but he obviously wasn't focused on that as he glanced behind him, "a lot of energy for you students." he laughed as he looked back at you, "must be nice to be young."

you laughed, smiling at him, "aren't you only 26?"

"well, yeah, but..." he playfully rolled his neck over his shoulders, "at some point in time, these old bones have to rest."

"and you decided to do that at your old frat house with a bunch of newly turned 21 year olds?"

he shrugged again, "better than the old farts in the league." he glanced around the party, noticing multiple of the attendees either drinking to their restless end, making out with some of the bubbly blonde sorority sisters or passed out on the ground, table or couch. "but, you're right. wanna head out?"

"yo-you wanna leave with me?"

he laughed, "yeah!" he smiled, his dimples making an appearance once more, "how rare is it that i meet a beautiful woman here among all these girls?"

you blushed at his compliment, smiling before nodding your head, "yeah. yeah, let's head out."

copyright © 2023 thewonandonly. all rights reserved.

[smoll-tangerine]

ten reasons why i hate you: reason #7

SYNOPSIS. while you admittedly didn’t refuse the arranged marriage between you and jung jaehyun, that didn’t mean that you’d allow him to treat you like a doormat. for the emotional distress he had put you through during the months leading up to your engagement party, you ensure that he will pay for the way he had been treating you for the rest of his life. 

PAIRING. rich boy!jaehyun x rich girl!reader GENRES. romance, fluff, angst, drama, rich kid!au CHAPTER WORD COUNT. 2621 

WARNINGS. (spoiler alert!!) someone got cancer, use of the term “bitch.”

DISCLAIMER. this is a work of fiction based on fictional events and characters. it is unrelated to any real people, organisations, locations, and events. the laws, and legal and medical interpretations in this work have also been modified for storytelling purposes.

TAGLIST. @crescent-iak @moonchele @ahtisa02 @ghostfacefricker6969 @jaehyunnie77 @jungish @anya-writes-stuff @hey-won @ishireads @xxxx-23nct @peachibevuti @shepeelsoranges @hopefulchick​ @baehaechannie​ @ya-lame​ @yumilovesavocado (bolded = unable to tag) 

[a/n]: a fair warning, this will be the last fluffy chapter for the rest of the series. enjoy it while you can hehe. super long chapter ahead to make up for my long hiatus!! i also really, really enjoyed writing this chapter. idk if it’s because it’s just little blurbs of moments. pls pls comment!! i love reading your feedback♡ a reminder to send me an ask if you want to be on the taglist~

← REASON #6 || MASTERLIST || REASON #8 → 

REASON #7 

You didn’t understand what compelled you to accept Jaehyun’s ridiculous request in the first place. 

Scratch that. You didn’t really accept Jaehyun’s request. 

At least, not without a condition of your own. 

You could tell from the look of frustration on Doyoung’s face that he also didn’t understand the reasoning behind your decision. 

“Who does he think he is?” he scoffed at Jaehyun’s condition and then gave you a small glare. Though you knew that he wasn’t truly mad at you. He could never. “What were even you thinking?”

You shrugged nonchalantly. “In the end, I won’t lose anything.” 

“Our relationship isn’t something worth considering?” 

You raised a brow at his snarky remark, silently asking him if he truly meant what he said, considering the fact that he was the one who dumped you in the first place. 

“Let’s be honest, Doyoung, do you really think that Jaehyun’s going to be able to actually break things off with her?” you replied. “That’s why I included a condition of my own. I’m only going to cut all ties with you after the five months are up.” 

Doyoung still seemed displeased with the situation. “Do you really think that you can cut all ties with me?” 

You scoffed. “Of course not. Not only our families are friends, we work at the same hospital. I’m not about to drop everything just because of a boy who made me cry.” 

A pregnant silence fell upon you two. 

It didn’t hit you how much your words rang true until you realized how silent Doyoung was being, considering how much he had to say about the situation. 

He let out a bitter laugh. “Yeah. That’s always how you’ve been.” 

You frowned at his statement, but did not refute. 

“You’ve never let anything—anyone—deter you from your goals. That was one of the reasons why I fell in love with you in the first place,” he continued. “But also one of the reasons why we had to break up.” 

“What are you trying to say, exactly?” 

Doyoung shrugged nonchalantly, allowing you to see that he meant no harm nor did he mean to offend you. “Sometimes, I can’t help but think what if you were just more... flexible? Would that have helped salvage our relationship?” 

“Perhaps,” you mused. 

He turned to you with a bitter smile. “Let’s say he meant it. Meant every word he said about breaking things off and needing—what, five months?—to make things right by you. And you can see that he’s truly making efforts to make your marriage work. Would you abandon your plan?” 

You chuckled at his words and tilted your head in curiosity. “Where is this coming from?” 

“My personal feelings aside,” he explained, “you’re still one of my closest friends. I still care about you, regardless of what happened between us. I only wish for your happiness. And I can see how it’s not this marriage with Jaehyun that’s draining you, but also this plan of yours to take him down. To make him regret.” 

Doyoung poked the little space between your brows and gave you his signature bunny smile. You couldn’t help but smile back in response. 

“I’m just saying.” 

“Yeah?” 

“It wouldn’t hurt to be more flexible in this case.” 

FIRST MONTH

“What is this?” 

You were slightly taken aback by the appearance of Jaehyun’s silver McLaren Speedtail parked in front of the hospital you worked at. As much as you disliked him, you couldn’t deny that he had taste in cars. 

Jaehyun smiled at you as he opened the door to the passenger seat for you and motioned you to get in. 

“What are you doing?” 

“I’m picking you up?” 

“Yeah, why exactly are you picking me up?” 

He let out a small huff through his nose. “Why would I not pick up my wife from her workplace after a long day?” 

You almost choked on your own spit as you couldn’t believe the words that came out of Jaehyun’s mouth. 

Did he just call you... his wife? 

You wordlessly entered his vehicle in a slight daze, unsure of what just occurred. You almost had to pinch yourself to make sure that you weren’t dreaming about the current situation you were in. 

It was just some weeks after he made you that promise on your honeymoon, but you didn’t expect him to spend time with you in addition to break things off with Chaeyoung. 

Sure, he said that he was going to try and make your marriage work. But this seemed like a complete 180 of his usual behaviour towards you that it almost gave you whiplash at how nice he could be. 

It reminded you of that time Chaeyoung told you that Jaehyun truly was a nice person, but you simply brought the worst out of him. 

It made you wonder if she was right. 

But the slight giddiness caused by Jaehyun’s actions and your lack of mental energy from work caused you to drop that question completely. 

It wouldn’t hurt to bask in this slight happiness, wouldn’t it? 

MONTH 2 

“Did you start the movie without waiting for me?” Jaehyun shouted in pure disbelief from your kitchen as he was busy making popcorn for the two of you. 

“No?” you shouted back, feigning innocence. 

Movie nights were now almost a weekly occurrence. 

Jaehyun would pick you up from work and you two would head back to your place. It first started with an episode from a series, then a short film, and then a whole movie marathon. You two never really set up a date or anything of the short. It just became something that was... natural. 

It honestly scared you just how natural things felt between you and Jaehyun. 

It was scary to see how well you actually got along with him. 

You didn’t expect to have this much in common with him. Your parents reassured you prior to your engagement that you would love the guy they had set you up with. You didn’t actually expect them to be right to this extent. 

“Scoot over,” he said to you. 

“No,” you refuted and sprawled over your couch, ensuring that he doesn’t have any space for him to sit. 

“I will sit on you!” 

“No, you won’t!” 

You let out a small screech as he actually sat on you. But you could tell that he didn’t put his full weight on you. 

“Get off me! You’re so heavy!” 

“I told you to scoot over!” 

You threw your head back in laughter, slightly wondering in the back of your mind when was the last time you’ve felt this way. 

Whatever it was, you wouldn’t mind continuing feeling this way. 

MONTH 3 

“So, when can we expect a grandchild?” 

Both you and Jaehyun choked on your food and immediately reached for your glass of water.

It was uncanny how you two started mirroring each other’s actions. 

Due to how busy everyone was, both of your families set up mandatory bi-weekly dinners. To get to know each other as in-laws but also in hopes of you and Jaehyun getting closer and less awkward in a stressful environment such as dinner with both families. 

“Your mother-in-law is right,” your mum dabbed a side of her mouth with a napkin. “It’s been almost four months since your honeymoon. Are there going to be any good news in the near future?” 

“How many children are you two planning on having?” 

“It’d be best to have the children at the beginning of your marriage before you two get too old for it.” 

Your tongue poked your inner cheek and you sighed in slight annoyance. That single bottle of red wine will not last you long enough. And you could tell from the look that Jaehyun gave you cheekily that he shared the same thoughts. 

To be honest, you didn’t even know if children were in the plans. 

Your relationship with Jaehyun wasn’t at a stage where you two can discuss this matter freely. Just thinking about it, even by yourself, was embarrassing. 

Hell, your relationship with Jaehyun wasn’t even at a stage where you two can even produce the very children your parents were talking about. 

“To be honest, I think that three children is perfect,” Jaehyun said with a smile. “But I think that also depends on my wife since she’s the one giving birth. What do you think, honey?” 

You coughed at the nickname that he used that came out of his mouth so naturally. As if that was something he always called you by. 

You froze in your seat as all eyes were on you, impatiently waiting for your opinion about the matter. You quickly turned to Jaehyun, eyes wide in panic as you had no idea what to say. 

He gave you a teasing smirk and sipped on his wine, probably enjoying this situation more than he should. But he still made no move to help you out despite your silent plea for help. 

“Yeah, three children sounds good to me?” you squeaked. 

All the elders erupted in laughter at your response and proceeded to discuss your future without the two of you. 

“So, three children, huh?” 

Jaehyun’s voice was ticklish in your ear.

“Guess we should start pretty soon.” 

MONTH 4 

It was a bit crazy to see the evolution of your relationship with Jaehyun. 

True to his words, Jaehyun did really try his best to make this marriage work. Because of that, there was some sort of tension between the two of you whenever you’d spend time together alone. You didn’t know whether it was sexual or platonic, but you dared to say that there was some sort of connection. 

You two often spent time together. If not spending time watching movies together, then it would be grabbing lunch or dinner, or going on small dates whenever you could. It took you two four months before you two finally held hands, but considering how your relationship first started, you’d like to think that it was immense progress. 

You two were now even making plans about moving in together. 

It made sense for the two of you to live together since you two were married. Not to mention there was no way you were going to move back in with your parents. It was actually Jaehyun’s suggestion that the two of you moved in together, surprisingly. You didn’t expect him to make such suggestion, but you guessed that just showed how dedicated he was to his promise to you. 

“Hey, where are you?” you called him as he was almost ten minutes late. “Are you still picking me up?” 

“Hey, yes! Sorry, something happened,” he replied, evidently in distress. “I’m sorry, but I won’t be able to pick you up today. I will send over one of my drivers so–” 

“Is everything alright? You don’t sound too good.” 

“Yes, everything is alright,” he continued. “I’m sorry that I can’t pick you up. I know we said that we were going to go furniture shopping today.” 

“Don’t be. We can always go another time,” you told him. “And don’t worry about the ride. I’ll ask Doyoung to give me a ride home or something.” 

You almost gasped at your words, remembering that Jaehyun didn’t like it whenever you would hang out with Doyoung. You knew that he didn’t mean to be controlling over who you hung out with. But to be fair, Doyoung was your ex-boyfriend and your colleague. 

You thought that Jaehyun would say something, especially since he would always grumble about how you had to meet up with Doyoung at some times. But he didn’t, which admittedly, was more surprising than expected.

“Okay, sounds good. I’ll call you later tonight!” 

If anything, it seemed like Jaehyun was so preoccupied that he didn’t even register who were you going to ask a ride from. 

Jaehyun was never one to reschedule things. He disliked being flaky. If anything, he would always tell you in advance if plans needed to be changed. 

You had a gnawing feeling at the pit of your stomach, eating you away for some odd reason. 

But you pushed it down as you told yourself that it was probably nothing. If it was anything important, Jaehyun would definitely let you know. 

If only you had listened to your guts that night. 

LAST MONTH  

“I’m sorry to ask this of you.” 

You wanted to laugh at the pitiful situation you were in, but you could only stare at Jaehyun and Chaeyoung in disbelief. 

The room was unbearably silent. Jaehyun’s apology echoed in your ears. The ticking sound that the clock in your office made sounded louder than usual. Blood rushed to your ears, the rhythmic thumping of your heartbeat was somehow comforting yet agonizing at the same time. 

“You’re one of the best surgical oncologist in the country,” Jaehyun continued. “I didn’t know who else to ask.” 

Anybody but me, you wanted to say. You could have asked anybody but me. 

“The other doctors we’ve seen so far all recommended that we come and see you. They say you’re the best there is, and if we were to treat a tumour of this size, only you could do it.” 

Shut up. Please shut up. 

You weren’t one to believe in karma. But you also liked to believe that due to everything—the hell—you had been through due to Jaehyun and Chaeyoung, that you wouldn’t be on the receiving end of karma. 

But karma was a bitch. 

And, so was cancer. 

“Please.”

Don’t ask me to treat her.

Please don’t ask me to treat her. 

“Please save Chaeyoung,” Jaehyun begged. “I will do anything. Anything you ask me, if you can just save her.” 

You stole a glance over at the circled number on your calendar, wondering if Jaehyun even knew what day it was. If he was just the slightest aware of what exactly was he asking of you. 

You knew you should have listened to your guts last month. 

You knew that you should have probed him further. 

You should have known the second he started picking you up less often. Started calling you less often. Started spending less time with you often. 

You should have known. 

And you hated yourself for trusting Jaehyun. 

For trusting his word. 

“Today’s the last day of the five-months mark you gave me.” 

Jaehyun’s eyes widened in horror, as if just realizing the dire, sticky situation he was in at the moment. There was the slightest hesitation in his brown orbs, but quickly blinked it away just like a mirage. 

He forgot. 

Of course, he did. 

“I’m sorry.” 

You needed him to stop apologizing. 

You needed him to stop apologizing when– 

“–you don’t even mean it.” 

Jaehyun looked away from your stare, unable to face you. Chaeyoung was the same, her eyes facing her lap, as if humbled by her situation. 

But you took an oath. 

Your professional feelings overtook your personal ones. And for the first time, you hated that part of yourself. That rationality that allowed you to cut off your emotions just like that. 

Because the only thing you wanted to do at the moment was to scream and crawl into your bed, to hide yourself away from the reality that was presented to you. 

“Go see the nurse outside of my office. She’ll set up an appointment for you.” 

Both of them sighed in relief. 

You never hated a sight so much before. 

You never hated yourself so much before. 

“And Jaehyun?” 

His delighted smile momentarily dropped the second he saw the serious expression that you were sporting, all signs of hope and amusement gone. 

“Don’t you dare talk or contact me ever again.” 

← REASON #6 || MASTERLIST || REASON #8 →

[renjunsbabygirl]

12:37 AM

A loud deep groan escaped jaehyun's mouth as he orgasmed for the umpteenth time that night. How many orgasms had he had? You had no idea. You lost count after the fourth round.

"How's that, baby?" You asked, chuckling a bit at his fucked out form. You gave his cute little butt a soft spank. Your strap still buried balls deep in his ass.

"Fucking amazing," he breathes. "Let's go again."

"Jae, we've been going at it for nearly two hours now," you exclaimed. "I'm tired."

"Then let me ride you," he hurriedly suggested. "Let me ride you. Fuck, please let me ride you."

Gosh, you never realized how high his sex drive was up until this point.

"Okay, fine," you agreed. Gently removing the strap from his hole before moving over to the chair in the corner of the room. Jaehyun bounced off the bed with no problem. Like he wasn't just in doggy style for nearly two hours.

You sat down with your legs spread. The silicon strap standing high and tall. You open your arms, telling him to come on. He happily straddled your lap. His chiseled chest hovering over your face. Stroking your strap like it was an actual cock before aligning it to his hole. Slowly, he sank down on the strap. Closing his eyes and once again groaning loudly at the euphoric feeling.

You lick your lips at the sight. Planting your hands on his hips, massaging them as he slowly bounces up and down. Him doing the same by placing his hands on your shoulders.

"You're so pretty," you praise him. "Taking my cock like a good boy."

You give his nipple a few kitty licks before wrapping your mouth fully around it. This sets him off and he begins bouncing faster. Whimpers leaving his mouth out of pure bliss. You release his nipple from your mouth before doing the same to the other.

"Oh, my god," he moans, wrapping a hand around his throbbing cock. "I'm gonna cum."

Suddenly getting some energy back, you lifted him up slightly with all your strength, snapping your hips up to thrust back into him roughly. He vigorously jerks his cock. Biting his bottom lip harshly as he nears another orgasm. You remove one hand from his hip to wrap around his neck, pulling him into a wet hungry kiss.

He cums. Splattering his hot white semen on his hand, some landing on your chest.

He pulls away from the kiss to catch his breathe. Pieces of his curly black hair fell over his hooded eyes. You brush them to the side leaning your forehead on his. You remove his cum covered hand from around his cock. Replacing it with your own; slowly pumping it to ride out his high.

"Fuck, that was crazy," he muttered, breathlessly "Never thought I could do that."

"Never thought you'd have a higher sex drive than me," you laugh.

He slides off of the strap. Helping you out of the harness and placing it on top of the dresser. You're about to walk to the bathroom to run a bath for him but he stops you; setting you back down on the chair.

"What are you doing?" You questioned as he sat on his knees in front of you.

"You just gave me the bestest sex ever," he said grabbing your calf's, setting your legs on his broad shoulders. "Did you really think I wasn't gonna pay you back?" He asked.

But before you can even respond,

He dove right in.

-

I would like to apologize for being dead as hell for the past several months. I started college back in august and i barely have time for anything nowadays. y'all had no idea how bad my writers block was until rn. anyways, thanks for staying tuned! and as always, the requests are open so feel free to send in one! 💕✨groups are listed in my bio!

[peanutpinet]

Comfort - Jung Jaehyun x fem reader

[3.33 am] it was one of those nights. Where you just have the tendency to wake up in the middle of the night. No, you didn't have a nightmare. No urge to go to the bathroom. No sudden hunger, no anything. You just simply woke up. The difference? You woke up with Jaehyun, your boyfriend of 1 year, right next to you.

Because you were still within Jaehyun's embrace, you tried your best to not wake him up. You turned around, now actually facing your boyfriend's sleeping face. You gently put one of your hands to cup his cheek, using your thumb to caress it when you felt his head lean into your touch. Realising that you might've accidentally woke him up, you quickly retracted your hand but instead, it was held in place by Jaehyun's hand.

"What's wrong? Couldn't sleep?" Jaehyun whispered, in his hoarse voice

"No. I'm sorry I woke you. Go back to sleep Jae" you whispered back, stroking his hair in hopes that he'll fall back asleep

"I'm alright. You should sleep too. Did you have a nightmare?" Jaehyun asked, his voice still rough

"No. It's just a tendency I have. Just woke up for no reason. I'll fall asleep eventually. You just go ahead and sleep" you reassure him

"Now how can I go back to sleep knowing that my girl isn't? Hmm?" Jaehyun questioned, pulling your smaller body closer to his, your face now placed right below his chin

"I, I'll be fine, Jae" you muttered, just inhaling Jaehyun's scent as he peppered your forehead with kisses

Because neither of you are able to fall back asleep, you just stayed in that position as Jaehyun just peppered you with kisses. You were never one to be into anything intimate. Heck, you never really experienced this amount of physical contact until you dated Jaehyun, who was also your first boyfriend in your whole life up till now.

Even so, Jaehyun wasn't one to push you or even pressure you to do anything too intimate that would push your boundaries. Instead, he opted for the slow route which he didn't mind at all and when you actually showed little intimacy back, it just made Jaehyun's heart melt because he knows that you're also trying your best which is all Jaehyun could ever ask for.

But for some reason, instead of feeling sleepy or drowsy from waking up so sudden, you were feeling a bit daring. As Jaehyun was leaning down, you decided to look back up to him and pulled him into a warm kiss. Though shocked at first, inside, Jaehyun can feel his heart racing and happiness slowly building up.

Before you could pull away from the kiss, Jaehyun snuck his arm to the back of your neck, pulling you back into the kiss, this time, Jaehyun took control. At first, it was slow and soft since Jaehyun was still testing, unsure if you're okay with it. But when you started replying to his kiss, he felt like he just won the lottery. Jaehyun slowly put his other hand behind your back and lifted you off your sleeping position as he himself sat up straight, leaning back to the headboard.

Placing you right on his lap, Jaehyun took your legs and wrapped them around his waist, still not breaking off from the kiss. But his action caught you off guard that you jumped a little, placing both your hands on his board shoulder, finally pulling away from the kiss. Both because you were slightly embarrassed that that just happened but also to catch some breath. Noticing your sudden action, Jaehyun let you relax for a bit, putting his hands on your waist to steady you while checking if you were alright.

"Hey, hey, are you okay? Was I going too far?" Jaehyun asked, one of his hands made its way to your head, pushing some hair strands out of your face

"No, no, it wasn't your fault. I'm okay. It, it's just, I, I n-never really done this" you managed to speak up, avoiding Jaehyun's gaze

"You're cute when you're embarrassed. Hey, hey, look at me" Jaehyun plead, his fingers suddenly under your chin, turning you so you would look at him

"Let me take care of you, baby girl, hmm? Just let yourself go. Let me show you how much I care and love you. I won't touch you like you would think; even if you gave me your consent" Jaehyun sweetly whispered, kissing your forehead, down to your nose, to your cheek, right behind your ear and down to your jaw and finally to your neck as you just slowly buried yourself into the crook of Jaehyun's neck, enjoying each other's comfort and getting lost in each other's touch

People might think that you're crazy for saying how this is one of the reasons why you fell in love with Jaehyun. Sure, he had the looks, he knows how to make a girl's heart flutter. But looks and flirting aside, Jaehyun appreciates you to the point where he'd always put you before himself. He would make sure that you were always alright, that he wasn't taking the relationship too fast and to always remind you that you are enough.

A/N: can't you tell that Jaehyun has officially bias wrecked me? ahaha, but tbh, I don't remember if this was a dream or I was just too hallucinated by Jaehyun since sticker era began :"

[saturnznct]

mornings with your twins | j.jh

➸ note; nobody asked me to write this but the image was in my head so enjoy

➸ word count; 684 words

➸ amelia & alissa; aged 3 months

nct masterlist

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Jaehyun is so in love.

He doesn’t care that it’s the ass-crack of dawn, orange light streaming through the pink curtains of his infant daughters’ shared nursery.

He watches Alissa sleep while Amelia is laying on his chest in the armchair, drinking from a bottle of milk that you had pumped. She’s quite a loud drinker, making little grunts as she swallows and the occasional sharp breath in as she accidentally inhales air.

Jaehyun’s eyes are so heavy, his body begging him to go back to sleep but he can’t, he doesn’t want to. He wants to stay in the moment forever, in his little bubble of love.

You’re sound asleep in yours and Jaehyun’s bed, completely unaware of the wholesome scene taking place just next door. Jaehyun’s okay with that though, he wants you to sleep.

Jaehyun spends a few moments thinking about the best place to take her, before deciding on your small balcony.

Jaehyun spends a few moments thinking about the best place to take her, before deciding on your small balcony.

Jaehyun spends a few moments thinking about the best place to take her, before deciding on your small balcony.

He tiptoes through your bedroom, unlocking and sliding open the sliding door as silently as he possibly could, before stepping outside.

The sun is rising, halfway up and giving off a golden glow that makes Jaehyun look like an actual greek god, although no one is around to see it. He sinks into one of the armchairs and starts to pat Amelia’s back, just basking in the stillness and warmness of the early morning, until she burps.

‘Good girl,’ Jaehyun murmurs, ‘let’s just chill here for a bit though.’

Amelia grunts in response, and Jaehyun shifts her so that she’s laying in his arms rather than over his shoulder.

‘Oh yeah, good morning little one,’ he presses a gentle kiss to her forehead, ‘I love you.’

He readjusts her little socks and sleeves so that she’s definitely as warm as she can be.

Suddenly, the sliding door clicks open once again, and Jaehyun turns around to see you, half asleep, standing there.

‘Oh sorry baby, did I wake you up?’

‘No, I think I got cold since you weren’t there.’

You collapse into the chair next to him, admiring the scene in front of you. A completely glowing Jaehyun, barefaced and tired, holding one of your precious baby daughters in his arms.

‘Is she alright?’ You ask.

‘Yeah, she just needed a feed and then I took her outside to burp her.’

‘Oh, what about Alissa?’

‘Asleep,’ Jaehyun explains simply, ‘but I have a baby monitor here, so I’m listening out.’

‘Ah good,’ you’re still stretching and yawning.

‘You don’t have to sit out here,’ Jaehyun says softly, ‘you should go back to bed, get some rest.’

‘I wanna be out here,’ you murmur sleepily, ‘it’s quiet. Won’t be for long.’

‘You’re right,’ Jaehyun chuckles, ‘how about we sit here until she falls back asleep and then we’ll go back to bed?’

‘Mmph, yeah,’ your head is already resting on his free shoulder, and Jaehyun’s chest vibrates with laughter.

‘I love you,’ he turns his head slightly to press a kiss to your forehead, ‘thank you for this.’

‘For what?’ You mutter, the allure of sleep trying hard to pull you under.

‘Making all this love.’

‘Yeah,’ you snort, ‘we did a lot of that.’

‘No,’ Jaehyun smirks, ‘I meant for loving me. For building a family with me. For these two. The three of you are the light of my lives and I just want to thank you for everything.’

‘I love you too,’ you whisper, ‘you’re our… angel.’

Jaehyun chuckles, pressing several kisses to your head.

‘As you’re all mine.’

Just as Amelia finally burps, a shrill cry suddenly echos out from the baby monitor. Your eyes snap open.

‘Hey, how about you lay down in bed and cuddle with Amelia and I’ll bring Alissa in. I’ll get her a bottle and we can have a family cuddle?’

’Sounds amazing,’ you’re already taking Amelia from Jaehyun, ‘I’ll meet you there.’

[ppangjae]

DIE FOR YOU | Jaehyun

—You won’t find no one that’s better.

SUMMARY. Jaehyun swore to never fall in love again after five unrequited crushes. But when all of his best friends get married and leave him behind, he might just break his oath. He just hopes that this time around, it’s not another unrequited love because he’s tired of throwing up flower petals.

GENRE. fluff and angst + f2l!au + hanahaki disease

note. hanahaki disease is a fictional disease. it’s an illness that occurs due to an unrequited love. the person experiencing unrequited love will throw up petals of their crush’s favourite flower. once the person experiences requited love, the disease will disappear.

WORD COUNT. 20.5k+ words (someone PLEASE stop me)

—I think I’m right for you.

Being inexperienced in falling in love would be an understatement. It wasn’t a choice, it was more of a predisposition made by fate. You’re not quite sure what you had done wrong in your past life that caused fate to curse you with such a boring love life. But as you blow out the twenty-two candles on your birthday cake, it reminds you that this is your twenty-second year of existing and yet you still don’t have someone that makes your heart flutter or skip one beat. At this point, you’re ready to give up. In fact, you’ve envisioned a future where you’d be single for the rest of your life and the only thing that’ll give you company will be your three puppies. Three cute puppies, yep, that sounds just about right. 

“Let me guess,” Jungwoo grins, “You wished for the miraculous improvement of your love life and possibly meeting the love of your life within the next two days.”

You let out a loud scoff. You’ve made the same wish for the past six years. Six years of making the same wish and it’s more than enough to give you the harsh reality that your wishes will never come true. Wishes never come true, if they do, they’re called miracles. 

“Wrong,” you smirk. “I wished for something else this year.”

“Oh?” He quirks an eyebrow. “What did you wish for this time?”

Your smirk drops. “If I tell you, my wish won’t come true.”

“Your wishes never come true, what makes this wish different?” He snickers. 

Jungwoo had a valid point. What makes this wish any different from all the wishes you’ve made? Since none of your wishes ever came true, what makes it any different that this wish will actually come true? Well, the difference this year is that the wish isn’t for you. The wish isn’t for your failing love life or for your defying fate. The wish is for your best friend Jaehyun. 

You spot Jaehyun poking his slice of cake with a fork. A warm, soft smile begins to spread your lips at the sight of your best friend. 

The closest feeling to falling in love that you’ve felt was surprisingly indirect heartbreak. You’ve never fallen in love, but you’ve watched Jaehyun fall in love five times. You’ve also watched Jaehyun’s heart break five times. Indirect heartbreak. Although you’ve never had an unrequited crush, you’ve seen Jaehyun experience it, and you can feel the pain—the heartbreak—that he goes through. 

You’ve always had a soft spot for Jaehyun. You’re the only one that knows about all his unrequited crushes. You’re the only one that knows about his disease, the sickness he feels whenever he experiences an unrequited love. You’re the only one that knows about his oath; that he swears to never fall in love again. But you think he deserves so much more. He deserves the whole entire universe, along with its galaxies and stars. 

And as his best friend, you gave up your birthday wish for him. 

You wish that the next person he falls in love with will be the one and not another unrequited love. 

“The cake is really sweet,” Jungwoo says as he reaches over to cut himself another slice. “Where did you get the cake?”

“Cha’s Cherry on Top,” you reply.

Jaehyun quirks an eyebrow. “Eunwoo made this?”

You smile while nodding your head. Jungwoo pulls out his phone and takes a picture of the cake along with the business card attached to the box.

“Eunwoo makes birthday cakes for you but not for me?” Jaehyun pouts. “So much for a best friend.”

“I guess that’s one of the many downsides of having a birthday on Valentine’s Day, Valentine boy.” Jungwoo teases. He receives a glare from Jaehyun in return.

You nod your head at Jungwoo’s phone. “You should really check out the bakery with Clara. You might be able to find the perfect wedding cake, discounted too!”

“Clara loves her discounts.” Jungwoo laughs. “At this point, anything helps.”

“It’s best to save more money for your baby,” you suggest. “She’s due in December, right?”

Jungwoo nods his head in reply. “Four months before our wedding.”

“Have you thought of names yet?” Jaehyun asks.

You and Jungwoo share a look that Jaehyun fails to notice. He’s too busy picking at his cake. Jungwoo clears his throat.

“We have but only names for a baby girl,” Jungwoo answers. “But we’ve been having trouble thinking of names for a baby boy. What do you have in mind, Jaehyun?”

You glance at your best friend. You bite your lip nervously. Jaehyun always wanted to start a family with the love of his life. But after experiencing five heartbreaks, it seems like he’s slowly changing his mind about his future.

“I’ve always wanted to name my son Yuno,” he confesses, finally scooping a forkful of cake and taking a small bite. “You should name your baby boy Yuno. I give you full permission. I’ll be his favourite uncle.”

Jungwoo’s face softens. “You’ll definitely be the favourite uncle, Jaehyun.”

The conversation ends at that. Jaehyun spends the rest of the day imagining how different his life would be if he just met the one. You spend the rest of your afternoon imagining how perfect of a father Jaehyun would be to his kids. That is, if Jaehyun decides to give love another try. You hope your birthday wish comes true. You hope Jaehyun finds the one.

Fate better get on with it.

Jaehyun experienced his first unrequited love at the sweet age of seventeen. It wasn’t the least bit pleasant. But she was so beautiful, she had a heart of gold, she was perfect. If he were to ever associate her with a colour, she’d be pink and yellow, just like the sight of pink and yellow peonies that he grew to hate because of her.

At the young age of seventeen, he learned to hate flowers. Flowers of every kind. He was diagnosed with Hanahaki Disease. The disease is only present whenever he experiences heartbreak from an unrequited love. When his feelings aren’t returned, it causes him to throw up petals of a flower. It could be any flower, but usually, it’s his unrequited lover’s favourite flower. It didn’t take him long to hate flowers no matter how beautiful they were because he never expected it to become a reminder of how far he was growing apart from the love of his life.

On the bright side, at the age of seventeen, he met you, his best friend. On the day he was rejected, he had mistakenly gone into the women’s washroom out of sheer panic and nervousness. The only thing on his mind at that moment was that he wasn’t feeling too great and he needed to throw up. You had entered the washroom a couple of minutes after, not expecting to see a guy throwing up pink and yellow peony petals in the toilet. It was a weird encounter, but that encounter soon became a secret only you and Jaehyun shared.

He’s been in love five times. He’s been heartbroken five times. But they all have hurt differently, especially his last relationship. He thought she was the one. He thought that she’d be the woman he’d spend the rest of his life with. He thought that she was his whole world. He thought she loved him the way he loved her. But she didn’t. At the same exact time, he didn’t expect to have a growing hatred for red roses.

“Are you feeling better?” He hears you ask as he coughs. He leans away from the toilet and flushes the rose petals. He presses his back against the wall and looks up at you.

“I’m tired,” he whispers. Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. As you take a seat next to him, you rest your head on his shoulder. “I’m tired of this, of everything. Why am I still in love with her?”

“When you love someone so much, letting go hurts so much more.” You mumble. “One day, she won’t even cross your mind. You just need to give your heart some time to heal.”

“It’s been eleven months.” He coughs again and you can feel and hear the emptiness in his lungs. He lets out a bitter chuckle. “Who knew that loving someone could hurt this much? To the point where my body gives in? To the point where I get sick?”

“People come in and out of everyone’s lives. It’s a given. But you can’t stop someone from stepping out of your life.” You explain. “She chose to leave. She chose not to stay. But one day, someone will choose to stay. Someone will choose to love you.”

“Do you think there’s someone out there that’ll choose me?”

You look up at him. He has an uncertain smile spread across his lips. You frown and hit his arm. He lets out a loud groan.

“Of course!” You exclaim. “She’s out there! It’s not the end of the world, Jaehyun.”

He laughs. “How could you say that when you haven’t even been in love or in a relationship? Aren’t you getting impatient? I’m sure you have doubts about your love life.”

You shake your head. “I know he’s out there. I’m not impatient. I’m very patient. Fate will bring us together someday. You just have to be faithful.”

“I wish I was as patient as you.”

“What can I say? I’m an expert. I’ve been single for twenty-two years!”

You find yourself sitting on Jungwoo’s couch accompanied by Jaehyun at ten past eleven in the evening. Jungwoo’s rummaging through his mini fridge for beer and you and Jaehyun are watching a Spongebob Squarepants rerun. 

There must be a reason as to why you and Jaehyun were dragged to Jungwoo’s small apartment out of sheer will. You were in the midst of cooking your dinner when Jungwoo showed up at your door. Oh how you wish you were at home right now, enjoying a tub of ice cream after having a scrumptious steak dinner. 

Jungwoo’s not sure what to expect from this, but his heart nervously beats faster than the ticking of his clock hung up on the wall. He tries to sneak a glance at his two best friends behind the fridge door and lets out a sigh. After arguing with himself, he juggles the cold cans of beer in his arms and joins you in the living room. Right when he plops his butt onto the couch and places the cans of beer onto the coffee table, his eyes meet yours. 

“Spill it, Jungwoo.”

“Drink some beer first—”

“There must be a reason why you dragged me out of the comfort of my own home—”

“So, this isn’t a hangout?” Jaehyun asks you. You nod and the room is silent. It’s so silent that you could hear Jungwoo gulp nervously. “Spill it, Jungwoo—”

“I hate being a burden to you guys but,” he begins before sighing frustratingly. “Clara and I are having trouble finding a perfect wedding planner. Since Clara is pregnant, the last thing I want her to do is stress out over our wedding.”

“We’ll help you find a wedding planner. You could’ve just asked.” Jaehyun chuckles before the dots start connecting in his head. He glances at you and you’re looking back at him with the same expression of realization. 

“Wait. You want us to be your wedding planners—”

“Yes, please.” Jungwoo begs. “I’ll even pay you for your time and work!”

“No.” You and Jaehyun say in unison. 

Jungwoo whines. “Do you not have some sort of sympathy for me, Jaehyun?”

“Nope.” He replies, pursing his lips into a tight line. His dimples show for a brief moment. 

“Y/N?” Jungwoo looks at you with hope in his eyes. 

You smirk. “Do I look like a wedding planner to you?”

“Well—”

“Then, no.” You cut him off while grabbing your can of beer from the coffee table. You take a sip of your beer and think about Jungwoo’s situation a second time. You tilt your head after much thought. “Actually, I don’t see anything wrong with that.”

Jaehyun looks at you as if you’ve gone insane. “Are you being serious right now?”

“Jungwoo’s going to pay us.” You shrug your shoulders. “All we have to do is just show up and pick and suggest what’s best for the wedding. It seems pretty simple.”

“You’re both our closest friends and we figured you knew us best. Thus, this would be a great idea.” Jungwoo convinces you. 

“He has a point.” You tell Jaehyun. “I’m in. Cheers to securing the bag.”

Jaehyun stares at you and Jungwoo as you clink beer cans. Jungwoo takes a sip of his beer and turns towards Jaehyun to give him puppy eyes. Jaehyun avoids his gaze and focuses on the TV. The characters on the show are laughing and their laughter echoes through Jaehyun’s mind, taunting him, haunting him, urging him to accept the offer. 

You watch the two with amusement and fold your arms. Jaehyun squints his eyes at Jungwoo and lets out a defeated sigh. There’s a fire that ignites in Jungwoo’s eyes. 

“When do we start?”

Cha’s Cherry on Top is everything you imagined it to be. It’s a busy bake shop filled with dedicated workers that display distinct personalities. For instance, the cashier that greets the three of you as you step in exudes nothing but a bright and cheery aura. It’s evident from her polka-dotted apron and cherry earrings. Working away behind the countertop are pastry chefs sporting pink aprons and rosy cheeks. But amidst all the hustle and bustle of the shop, Cha Eunwoo can be easily spotted with the human eye. 

In fact, he’s the first one you notice when you step into the shop. He’s frosting a freshly baked cake. You can’t help but swoon over how handsome the young pastry chef and owner is. It’s a shame that he’s off the market. 

“My strawberry shortcakes are finally here!” 

You snap out of your thoughts as Eunwoo brings you back to reality. He’s making his way towards the three of you. 

“Did you enjoy your birthday cake?” Eunwoo asks you. 

“It was delicious, thanks again.” You smile. 

“I’m glad to hear that.” He chirps. “Jungwoo! Congratulations on your engagement!”

Jungwoo sheepishly smiles, feeling all shy from the sudden attention he’s receiving. 

“The reason we dropped by was because—”

“You want me to create your wedding cake, don’t you?” Eunwoo grins. He throws his arm over your shoulder and you’re caught off guard. 

Jaehyun stares at Eunwoo’s arm that’s thrown over your shoulder. He’s not sure when or how you got close with each other. He doesn’t remember Eunwoo having so much skinship with you. 

“You came to the right place.” He flashes his pearly-white teeth as he smiles. His eyes form into beautiful crescents. “You’re lucky you’re good friends with Y/N. I always give discounts to her friends and family.”

You blow a kiss in Jungwoo’s direction. “Consider me your guardian angel, your one-way ticket to a perfect wedding. I’m expecting higher pay for this job, Jungwoo.”

Jaehyun nods his head at Eunwoo. “Do you have any samples prepared for us to taste?”

“Yep.” Eunwoo’s smile wipes off his face. “Hey, you didn’t show up to the group function for the third time! You didn’t even get a chance to taste the new chocolate croissants I baked!”

“At this rate, I’m going to get diabetes with all the cupcakes you bring to our hangouts.” Jaehyun rolls his eyes. “I’m sure Jungkook would be more than happy to take your treats instead.”

“Stop being a no-show at our hangouts and have fun for once. I swear you’re always cooped up in your apartment.” Eunwoo raises an eyebrow at him.

“I agree. Please take him out of the apartment for me. It’s so difficult. It’s not an easy one-man job.” You sigh, following Jungwoo to an empty booth.

Jaehyun and Eunwoo break out into smiles and follow suit. The four of you sit in one booth and one of the cashier employees drops by with the menu. 

“Is there anything in particular that you have in mind? Ideas? Suggestions?” 

“Clara has quite a sweet tooth. She really loves red velvet cakes.” Jungwoo starts off.

Eunwoo hums. “I guess we can start from there. I’ll bring some slices of different cakes and you can taste them, see if you like them, and then we can choose your top three.”

“Am I missing something between the two of you?” Jaehyun asks you once Eunwoo heads to the back of the kitchen to fetch several slices of different cakes. 

You raise an eyebrow. “No?”

“You and Eunwoo seem oddly close. He told me that he has a new girlfriend.” He shrugs his shoulders. 

Jungwoo kicks your foot underneath the table and you have to bite your lip to contain the painful yelp threatening to come out. You send him a death glare. 

“We’re not dating.” You laugh and the serious look on his face surprises you. “Wait, did you think his new girlfriend was me?”

“If I didn’t know you or Eunwoo, I would’ve been convinced enough to think that the two of you were dating.” Jaehyun mumbles.

Jungwoo’s eyebrows raise and he turns to face you. You look at him questioningly. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Didn’t Eunwoo have the biggest crush on you—”

“Here are the samples.”

Your mouths clamp shut when Eunwoo arrives with a tray filled with several slices of cake. You and Jaehyun meet eyes and he squints them at you. 

“These are all the red velvet cakes we serve.” Eunwoo explains. Sitting on the table are a variety of red velvet cakes, it’s almost difficult to find a difference between each one. 

“They all look the same.” Jaehyun chuckles. 

“Shall we start cake tasting?”

Everyone glances at Jungwoo and he smiles sheepishly. 

“Let’s dig in.”

As the three of you dig into the first slice of a red velvet cake, Jaehyun finds himself glancing at you as you take a bite. Unknowingly, you get some of the cream cheese icing on the side of your mouth. He feels a sudden urge to reach out and wipe it off for you. He decides not to, and instead, kicks your foot underneath the table. You jump in your seat, looking up and your eyes meet Jaehyun’s. He points at the corner of his mouth.

“You have icing,” he mumbles and your eyes slightly widen. You wipe the side of your mouth and he chuckles. You look quite endearing and adorable right now. “No, you missed it.”

“I did?” You pout, wiping your mouth again until Jaehyun gives up.

He reaches over from across the table and wipes the icing off the side of your mouth with his thumb. Your doe-eyes look into his. Did your heart just skip a beat? You’ve never felt your heart beat this fast. You’ve never seen Jaehyun up this close. His face is so close to yours that you could count his eyelashes. 

“You could’ve just given her a napkin to wipe it off.”

The two of you tear away from each other like two repelling magnets. You look at Jungwoo, completely in a daze. His eyes dart between the two of you and a grin slowly spreads across his lips. Jaehyun, however, looks unbothered. 

The cake tasting session takes up two hours of your afternoon and ends up with Jungwoo choosing three distinct red velvet cakes. The wedding cake will be a three-tier red velvet cake, with each tier being one of the three cakes Jungwoo chose, respectively. And just as Eunwoo promised, Jungwoo got a discount for the wedding cake. 

The three of you are metres away from the bake shop when you hear your name being called out from behind. When you look over your shoulder, you find Eunwoo jogging up to you with a small cake box in his arms. 

“Y/N!”

“Eunwoo, slow down before you fall on your face.”

He catches up to you and grabs your hands to place the small box onto them. You quirk an eyebrow. 

“It’s for your mother. We made too many batches of strawberry shortcakes.” 

You smile. “You really didn’t need to, but thanks.”

Jaehyun watches you beam at Eunwoo. He barely notices the unsettling feeling in his gut at the sight of the two of you. Jungwoo’s in the middle of answering a phone call. 

“Today?” Jungwoo’s flustered. He scratches the back of his neck. “Yeah—Well—we can probably make it on time, I guess. You’re open until six?”

Eunwoo bids a farewell and jogs back to his bake shop. Jaehyun looks at you suspiciously as you look back at him with a questioning look. Jungwoo clasps his hands together. 

“I guess we’re making a trip to the flower shop. Their client booked for today cancelled last minute and offered to meet with us instead.”

You and Jaehyun share a look. Jaehyun has a growing hatred for flowers and going to the flower shop would be his biggest nightmare. Jaehyun looks nervous but he covers it up with a small smile. 

“Let’s get going then. We wouldn’t want them waiting, right?” Jaehyun insists. 

“What—Jaehyun—” He cuts you off with a look that tells you that he’ll be just fine. You frown, watching him follow Jungwoo to his car. 

Jaehyun looks over his shoulder. “Are you coming or not?”

He doesn’t want to be here. Clearly. It’s evident through the intense staring contest he’s having with the shop’s lit up sign, Lina’s Blooming Flowers. This is his biggest fear and nightmare. Stepping foot inside the flower shop would be major character development for him. It’s similar to the feeling of stepping on the edge of a cliff and counting down before bungee jumping. Nervousness and anxiousness is etched all over his face.

For a brief moment, his nervousness fades away when he feels your hand being placed on his shoulder. You give his shoulder one reassuring squeeze. He glances at you and you give him an encouraging smile.

“We made it just in time with an hour to spare before their closing time!” Jungwoo says excitedly. 

The last time Jaehyun stepped foot inside a flower shop was when he bought his mother flowers for Mother’s Day. At the time, he wasn’t aware of the disease he had. He vividly remembers the scent of fresh lavender and hyacinth. Back then, the fragrant smell of flowers brought him warmth and a sense of rebirth or renewal. Now, just a whiff of flowers makes him nauseous. 

As the three of you enter the shop, you can hear Jaehyun let out a breath that he’s been holding in for heaven knows how long. Standing at the front desk is a woman around your age, wrapping a bouquet of flowers in plastic wrap. It’s an assortment of white and red roses. Red roses. It’s the flower that Jaehyun has grown to hate because they remind him of her. You feel yourself wince and shrivel up, trying to think of ways to distract Jaehyun from seeing the roses. But it’s too late when she catches everyone’s attention with a gasp of panic. Jaehyun stares at the bouquet of roses and feels his lungs start to clog up just at the sight of them. The florist is quickly finishing her job before approaching the three of you.

“Jungwoo, right?” She asks.

Jaehyun snaps out of his gaze and looks at the woman walking towards the three of you. His eyebrows raise. 

“Yes! That’s me.” 

“Great! Sorry for the wait,” she apologizes sheepishly. “I’m Lina, the florist of this shop.”

As she shakes each one of your hands, she extends her hand out to Jaehyun and he looks at her in complete daze. She giggles when Jaehyun is brought back to reality, finally shaking her hand. She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and you don’t fail to notice how red Jaehyun’s ears are. This is the first time Jaehyun’s heart skipped a beat since his last breakup. He earns another nudge from you.

“Are you okay?” You mouth at him and he nods his head.

He’s surprised. It’s the first time he forgot about his hatred and fear for flowers, even if it was just for a brief moment. 

And it’s all because of a beautiful florist. 

“Let’s get started with the colour scheme.” Lina suggests, guiding everyone to the front desk. She pulls out a book filled with many colour schemes and hands it to Jungwoo. She smiles at you and says, “Is there anything you had in mind for your wedding?”

You break out into a chuckle. “Oh, no, I think you got it all wrong—I’m not, no—me? No. I’m not the fiancé. I’m just a—”

“She’s my wedding planner.” Jungwoo cuts you off and points at Jaehyun. “He’s my wedding planner too.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” She exclaims. “I had no idea. It’s my fault for making such assumptions.”

You wave it off. “It’s alright. No worries.”

She laughs nervously. “Shall we continue choosing the colour scheme?”

Jungwoo’s busy skimming through the book and having a FaceTime call with his pregnant fiancé to pick the colour scheme together. Jaehyun’s eyes scan the shop, looking at all the different types of flowers. He spots the peonies placed in metal vases along with roses of different colours. He could probably run a flower shop himself if he fully overcame his hatred and fear of flowers, all because he knows every single kind of flower that exists. 

It seems promising. 

“Have you been here before?” He hears someone ask and he turns around. It’s Lina. 

“Maybe once when I was younger.” He replies. 

“Oh, I see.” She purses her lips into a tight line. “You look familiar. Did you come to the shop with your grandmother, perhaps? On Mother’s Day?”

His mouth forms into an ‘o’ shape. “Yes, I have.”

“No wonder!” She exclaims. “So you’re the little boy I wanted to befriend when I helped my mother run the shop.”

“So, we’ve met?” Jaehyun scratches the back of his neck and she nods vigorously. 

He tries to dig through his memories to try and remember Lina. It takes a while until he squints his eyes at the familiar set freckles on her cheeks and her light brown eyes. He lets out a soft gasp. 

“You’re the little girl I accidentally bumped into!” 

“And you made me spill all the water from the watering can!”

Soft laughter can be heard from the front desk. It breaks your focus on helping Jungwoo with the colour scheme. You look over your shoulder to find Jaehyun laughing along with the florist, Lina. They seem to be very engaged in their conversation. Jaehyun looks… happy. There’s not a single wave of nervousness or anxiousness on his face or in his gestures. It makes a wide smile form on your lips. 

But why do you feel a little bit left out? Why do you feel like you’re missing out? Why do you feel slightly jealous that someone else is putting a smile on Jaehyun’s face? Is it wrong to feel jealous?

“Y/N.”

Your head snaps in Jungwoo’s direction and he looks at you with concern. You barely realize that your eyebrows were furrowed the entire time until you feel your face soften. “Yeah?”

“Everything alright?” He asks. “I asked you the same question four times and you didn’t answer.”

“O-Oh, were you? Sorry, I was just—what were you saying?”

It was a huge relief for Jungwoo and Clara when they realized that they didn’t need to hire a photographer. It just so happened that you, their wedding planner slash best friend, has a huge knack for photography. Thus, the engaged couple will not need to worry about the expenses. 

“This is sick.” Jaehyun utters out when Jungwoo pulls up to the photo shooting location. 

You look out the window. Jungwoo and Clara decided to have their prenuptial photos taken at a location where they had their first date. It’s extremely romantic. They had their first date out on a large field of sunflowers. Sunflowers are scattered across the field, along with some grass patches where couples and families would have a small picnic. 

The first thing you notice is how Jaehyun pays no mind to the sunflowers ahead of him. He’s looking at them with his two eyes and not a single reaction is coming out of him. That is, until he breaks out into a smile. 

You tilt your head in confusion. Huh?

Jaehyun’s taking some photos on his phone. “I should send these to Lina. I think she’ll love it.”

You raise an eyebrow. You grin. “You seem to be getting very close with Lina.”

He blushes. “We are. I actually asked her to hang out with me this Friday.”

“Look at you!” You exclaim with a teasing grin. “Since when were you picking up girls without telling me?”

“I was going to tell you today.” He laughs and it dies down when he thinks of something. “You know, I have a great feeling that she may be the one.”

The one? Your smile slightly falters. Of the five times that Jaehyun told you that the woman he has fallen in love with could be the one, you’ve always been extremely happy and supportive. But why was it that this time around, you didn’t feel as happy? 

“Let’s get started with the shoot! I found the perfect place!” Clara says. 

“R-Right!” You exclaim, grabbing Jaehyun’s arm. The two of you jog to catch up with the engaged couple. 

As you reach the spot, Jungwoo and Clara do some quick fix ups on each other. You’re busy setting up the equipment and Jaehyun’s in the midst of having a phone call with Lina. Every now and then, you find yourself trying to sneak a glance at Jaehyun, only to see him smiling so wide that his dimples were showing. 

Suddenly, you feel a sharp pain in your lungs. Your tripod collapses onto the grass as you gasp for some air. Clara notices and immediately rushes over to you. You’re still trying to catch your breath. You feel as if you’ve run a marathon. Your breathing is low and deep. Your throat feels like it’s on fire. 

“Y/N?” You hear Jaehyun ask as he heads towards you. “Everything alright? What happened?”

Clara is handing you a bottle of water. You pry the cap open and chug half of the bottle down. You gasp for air and start a small coughing fit. “Do I need to call an ambulance? Y/N, you’re getting pale. Have you been feeling unwell since this morning?”

Your legs feel like jello and they give out, sending you to the grass. You clench your eyes shut and you could barely answer their concerns. It takes you a couple of minutes to get back to normal. 

“Y/N, look at me.”

Clara is forcing you to face her when she cups your cheeks with her hands. Jungwoo is in complete shock, not saying a single word. Jaehyun looks extremely concerned for you. 

“I’m okay. I think it’s because I skipped breakfast this morning.” You say as you finally catch your breath. 

The pain in your lungs goes away instantly. You’ve finally gained power to stand up again. You’re not sure what happened to you because you’ve never experienced this in your life. 

“Are you sure? It didn’t look like it.” Jungwoo bites his lip nervously. 

“I’ll be fine.” You reassure them. “Let’s get on with the shoot.”

After five minutes of them protesting you to go home and get rested, they finally give in to your stubbornness and decide to finish up the photoshoot. 

The photos come out beautifully. There are photos of Jungwoo and Clara running through the field of sunflowers. There are single shots of Clara caressing her baby bump with one hand and holding a sunflower in the other. There are solo shots of Jungwoo hiding behind sunflowers and popping out from behind it. 

“You should really start a photography business.”

You look over your shoulder to see Clara. She’s looking at the photos you’ve taken through the viewfinder. 

“Should I?” You ask and she nods. 

“You’re very talented, Y/N. I know a couple of photographers who run their own businesses. I could hook you up.” She winks at you. 

“I don’t know, I have a lot of things I want to accomplish.” You say, feeling unsure. 

“You should give it a try. You never know what the future has in store for you.”

“He said he’ll be running late.”

You tell Jungwoo as you catch up to him. The three of you were supposed to go venue-hunting for reception. However, ever since the three of you visited the flower shop, Jaehyun had started to bail out on the wedding plans. You couldn’t blame him, he probably needed time off to himself after spending a whole afternoon with flowers. But what threw you off was the sound of feminine laughter when he had called you to notify that he’d be running late.

“Late?” You nod. “Weird.”

“It’s alright. We can do it without him.” You reassure the soon-to-be groom. 

The two of you arrive at the first venue. It’s a reception hall for roughly a thousand guests. It’s huge and spacious. Your eyes scan through the venue and you immediately spot the huge chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. You frown.

“I don’t think Clara will like it,” you say as you point up at the chandeliers. “Doesn’t she hate grand decorations like chandeliers?”

Jungwoo hums in agreement. “Shall we get going to the next venue?”

You nod and head towards the owner of the reception hall. You fake a smile. 

“We’ll get back to you if we’re interested in renting out the space.” You insist and the owner agrees. “Thank you for your time.”

The second venue is everything it promised to be. You stare at the venue in awe. If you were to ever get married, this was the venue you’d choose. It’s a venue where modern meets boho. Instead of chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, there are potted plants and flowers with fairy lights wrapped around them. The chairs are wooden and the tables are long enough for roughly ten guests. On both sides of the room, there are large windows overlooking a field of flowers. 

“Clara would love this venue,” Jungwoo says in awe. 

You nod in agreement. “I think so too.”

You hear the owner greet customers and you turn around to see Jaehyun arriving with… Lina? You and Jungwoo share a look. 

“Sorry for running late,” Jaehyun apologizes. 

Lina smiles sheepishly. “I’m so sorry for tagging along. I hope it’s alright with you, Jungwoo.”

Jungwoo lets out an uneasy chuckle. “Yeah, no worries. You are the florist for our wedding, how can I say no to you?”

The owner approaches the four of you. “I’m assuming the two of you are also looking for a venue for your wedding?”

Jaehyun and Lina stare at each other before blushing. You feel your eyes squint in suspicion. Jungwoo feels confused. Since when were these two close? Did something happen between the two of them? 

“We’re not getting married.” Lina shakes her head. “We’re just friends, right, Jaehyun?”

“Yeah, we’re just best friends.” Jaehyun tells the owner.

You stop yourself from scoffing. Best friends? Since when were they best friends? They clearly just met a couple of days ago and now they’ve upgraded to best friends from being strangers? 

Jungwoo nudges you. You snap out of it. “Let’s just keep this venue on the list and move onto the last one, alright?”

Why are you looking into it too much? 

“S-Sure.” You mutter.

You never consider yourself hot-headed. But this is the first time you’ve ever felt your blood boil and your blood pressure shoot up. Jungwoo hops into the driver’s seat. You decide to sit in the front passenger’s seat, looking at the rearview mirror to see Jaehyun and Lina hop in the back. They’re sitting awfully close to each other, with their shoulders brushing. You huff out a breath, looking away and distracting yourself with the clouds in the sky. 

Jungwoo tears his gaze from the road and glances at you. A soft smile spreads across his lips when he sees you mumbling to yourself. To you, you don’t think it’s obvious. But to Jungwoo, he can see how jealous you are over the two lovebirds sitting in the back of his car. He looks in his rearview mirror to see Jaehyun holding Lina’s hand.

He sighs.

“Today’s going to be a long day.”

“Of all the times Jaehyun bails out, he decides to bail out on the suit fitting too?”

Jungwoo’s standing in front of the mirror, fixing his tie. One of the tailors, Jungkook, who’s a close friend of Jaehyun’s, is standing right behind him with a rack filled with other suits. You sigh, shrugging your shoulders. There’s nothing much you could do. You could scold Jaehyun for being such a slacker, but you decide not to. 

“The grey looks great on you,” Jungkook compliments Jungwoo. “I’m wearing a grey suit to my wedding too.”

“You’re getting married?” You blurt out and Jungkook chuckles.

“I’m surprised you haven’t gotten your invitation yet.” He mumbles. “It should be coming in the mail in the next couple of days. My fiance and I just mailed them out last Friday.”

“I got my invitation.” Jungwoo adds. “I guess we’re all getting quite old since I’m attending weddings left and right.”

Jungkook smirks. “I bet Jaehyun’s going to be next.”

Your ears perk up in curiosity. Jungwoo looks at you through the reflection in the mirror. As he studies your reaction, Jungkook helps button up the ends of his sleeves.

“Jaehyun?” You ask.

“Yeah, at the rate, him and that florist will end up together.” Jungkook shrugs his shoulders. 

You frown but you try to cover it up with a smile. “Cute.”

“They’ve been hanging out a lot recently,” he adds, fixing up Jungwoo’s collar. He dusts off his shoulders and turns back around to look at Jungwoo’s reflection in the mirror. “I think the reason why he bailed out on you guys today is because they’re going to an amusement park.”

Jungwoo furrows his eyebrows. “He bailed out on this for a day at the amusement park?”

“Don’t tell him I told you.” Jungkook warns him. “If he ever finds out, he’ll have me dead.”

Jungwoo glances at you and you try to avoid fuming in anger. Who would’ve thought that Jaehyun would choose a woman he barely knows, over his own best friend who’s getting married in a couple of months? There’s disappointment written all over Jungwoo’s face and it fails to remain hidden. Jungkook, on the other hand, feels like he has just ruined the entire atmosphere and decides to give Jungwoo a discount on his suit in compensation.

As Jungwoo’s paying for his suit, you’re scrolling through your social networking account and right when Jungkook’s cashier machine lets out a soft ‘ding!’, you find Jaehyun’s new post. 

And indeed, it’s a picture of him and Lina at the amusement park.

Why do you feel sad? Why do you wish that it was you instead of her? Why do you always feel like you’re missing out whenever he’s with her? Why is he spending more time with her and less time with you?

Why do you feel this way?

You’ll never know.

Clara looks stunning in her wedding dress. You stare at her in awe as the tailor is zipping up the dress for her. Her baby bump is starting to show underneath her dress. You’re too distracted by her beauty to notice that Jaehyun and Lina are entering into the shop. 

Clara’s gaze tears away from you as she spots Jaehyun and Lina. She furrows her eyebrows in confusion. “Jaehyun, you came?”

Jaehyun nods. “Jungwoo told me to accompany you. You know him, he believes in that stupid superstition.”

She waves at Lina. “I’m guessing you’re Lina?”

“Yes, you guessed right.” Lina giggles and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. It’s probably a mannerism of hers whenever the attention is on her, you note. 

“How do you like the dress, ma’am?” The tailor asks the bride-to-be.

“It’s nice, I think I might take this one. I’m not really particular with the dress.” She replies and an idea pops into her head. “Do you perhaps have any bridesmaid dresses ready for fitting?”

“Yes, we do. Do you want to start with the fitting for the bridesmaids?” The tailor questions.

“Yes. I want my maid of honour to pick out a dress—”

“Clara,” you look at her with surprise. “I literally just ate a hamburger, I feel bloated—”

“Stop overreacting and put a dress on. You look fine. You look beautiful.” She cuts you off. “Besides, we’re already here.”

“Fine.” You sigh with defeat, following the tailor into the back of the shop to pick out some dresses.

The dresses come in different colours. The couple plan on having the plain grey and white colour scheme. Your eyes scan the selection before you point out at two different dresses. The tailor looks at you and flashes a smile.

“You have a great eye for dresses, ma’am.” She compliments you and you chuckle.

“I guess being a wedding planner was a good idea.” You muse.

The first dress you put on is an elegant dress that reaches the floor. It’s strapless and has a long slit on the side, revealing your leg. As you look at yourself in the mirror, you bite your lip. You’ve never seen yourself dressed up like this.

“Let me see!” Clara exclaims.

As you walk out of the fitting room, your eyes meet Clara’s. She looks at you like she sees a ghost. You begin to panic.

“What? It looks bad?” You frown.

“No, you look,” she begins. “You look beautiful, Y/N.”

“T-Thanks?” You let out an uneasy laugh.

“You really look beautiful, Y/N.” Lina adds and you’re not sure what to say. 

You look at Jaehyun, who’s too busy texting someone on his phone. He remains unbothered and uninterested. Somehow, you have the urge to make him look at you. 

“Shall we try on the next dress?”

You snap out of your thoughts, looking at the tailor. “Sure.”

As you’re putting on the second dress, the tailor is helping you zip up at the back. The dress is a mermaid dress. It shows your curves at your hips and while the dress is off-shoulder, it reveals your collarbones, perfect for stacking necklaces. 

“How do I look?” You ask as you step out of the fitting room.

Jaehyun looks up from his phone when he hears Lina and Clara let out a gasp. The moment his eyes are on you, his eyebrows raise. You look stunning, it’s almost effortless. Your hair is put up in a messy low bun with strands of your hair framing your face. The last time he saw you dressed up like this was prom night. Time slows down for him and it feels like it’s just the two of you in the room. You’re laughing over a joke Clara probably said, but he finds himself getting lost in a trance by your beauty. 

“Jaehyun?” 

He snaps out of his trance to see Lina nudging him. He glances at her and she points at one of the dresses hung up on the rack. “Hm?”

“I was just telling you how that dress could look so beautiful on Y/N. What do you think?” Lina asks.

Jaehyun shakes his head. “No, I think the dress she has on is the one.”

“Really?” He hears you say. Both of your eyes meet.

He slowly nods his head, almost falling into another trance.

“It looks perfect.”

May 2nd. 

“I tried creating your wedding cake yesterday and this is how it turned out.”

You’re too busy looking out the window. The cherry blossoms have finally bloomed and there’s a plethora of couples out on dates. Eunwoo and Jungwoo’s chatter is drowned out by your thoughts and the sight of a young couple taking a selfie in front of a cherry blossom tree. There’s a small smile on your lips but it drops from your face when you’re reminded of Jaehyun. 

“Y/N?”

You slowly turn around. Eunwoo is asking you to join them in the kitchen. You push yourself off the window sill to join them. 

Jungwoo frowns. “Where’s Jaehyun? Did he bail out on us again?”

You nod. “Unfortunately. He said he wanted to take a day off from the planning.”

He scoffs. “A day off? There was never a day where he was with us.”

The three of you are cutting yourselves a slice of the wedding cake. Eunwoo can’t help but notice how quiet you’ve been since you entered the bakery shop. Your mind is flooded with thoughts that you can’t seem to explain or describe. They’re thoughts only you can understand. 

Eunwoo gets a phone call. “Excuse me, I have to take a phone call. Please go ahead and taste the cake.”

Eunwoo leaves the two of you in the back kitchen with a three-tier wedding cake. You’re poking your slice of cake with a fork and Jungwoo nudges you. 

“Is everything alright? You’ve been quiet all morning.”

You smile. “I’m alright. I guess I’m just a bit tired.”

“It doesn’t seem like it.”

You sigh. “Is it that obvious?”

“Very obvious,” he mumbles and tilts his head. “Did anything bad happen between you and Jaehyun?”

“What? No.” You answer. “Why? Does it look like it?”

Lately, Jungwoo’s been noticing a lot of things. He’s been noticing how whiny and angry you get whenever Jaehyun bails out on the two of you. He’s seen the longing stares you have whenever Jaehyun is around. He sees how nervous you get whenever you’re around Jaehyun because of the ridiculous amount of times you’ve fiddled with your fingers. You’re jealous and you don’t even know it.

He sees himself in you. The last time he’s been like this was when he first fell in love with his fiance.

“Y/N, can I ask you something?”

“Jungwoo, I need your help.”

The both of you look at each other and laugh. He takes a bite of his cake. “Oh, this is delicious! Anyways, you go first.”

“How do you know if you’re in love with someone?”

He chokes on his cake. You pat his back and offer him a glass of water. “Sorry, repeat that for me.”

“How do you know if you’re in love with someone?” You ask again. “I’ve never been in love before, so I figured you would be the perfect person to ask.”

“It depends.” He starts off explaining.

“How so?” You mumble. 

“It’s different for every person. When I fell in love with Clara, I always felt happy around her. I’d always find myself putting in more effort. I’d find myself thinking about her even though I shouldn’t be, I’d wonder if she had eaten her meals, if she’s getting enough sleep. But I knew that I was falling in love with her when she started liking someone else. I figured that I would shoot my shot whether she liked me or not because I felt that I owed it to myself.”

You smile. “And all this time, she was in love with you.”

He nods his head with a warm smile. He wiggles his eyebrows. “Have you been feeling that way?”

You’ve always felt happy around Jaehyun. You and Jaehyun are like two peas in a pod. You’re both stuck together like glue. He makes you a better person everyday. You can’t imagine your life without him. 

You’ve always been putting in more effort. When Jaehyun got his heart broken five times, you’ve always been there. You chose to stay. 

Lately, Jaehyun has been on your mind more than usual. Ever since he started bailing out on helping Jungwoo plan his wedding, you’ve been wondering if he’s doing alright or if there’s anything wrong. Ever since he started hanging out with Lina, you’ve been wondering if she’s been treating him out for his favourite ice cream or if he’s been eating his meals with her. Sometimes, Jaehyun would make you worry and all it took for those worries to go away was one phone call or text from him. 

But maybe you’re falling in love with Jaehyun. Ever since he started showing interest in Lina, it was slowly starting to make you realize that you too, have feelings and you too, can fall in love. You’ve been comparing yourself to Lina. You’ve been craving to hold Jaehyun’s hand. Whenever he smiles at you, it’s like the whole world stops and you’re not sure how to act. You feel shy around him, which is unusual for you. You’re never shy around your best friend. 

But I knew that I was falling in love with her when she started liking someone else. 

“Holy shit.”

You’re in love with Jaehyun. You’ve been in denial about your feelings for him this entire time. You’re in love with your best friend, Jaehyun. 

“Language!” Jungwoo scolds you. 

I figured that I would shoot my shot whether she liked me or not because I felt that I owed it to myself.

“I have to go.”

Jungwoo watches you scramble for your things. You’re in a rush. As you leave the kitchen, Jungwoo can’t help but smile. He knows. He knows that you’re in love with Jaehyun. You don’t need to tell him because he sees it. 

“I’m just a couple blocks down from the cafe, the driver can park in front of the bakery—Y/N?”

“I have to go! Let me know how it goes!”

Eunwoo looks at you bewilderedly as you wave at him. You’re running down the street with your purse barely slung over your shoulder. He tilts his head in confusion. 

“Where is she going?”

Jungwoo steps out of the bakery and places his hand on Eunwoo’s shoulder. 

“She’s going to shoot her shot.”

As you reach the bus stop, you see a bus loading on passengers. You let out a groan and sprint to the bus, hoping to get on it. Fortunately, you hopped onto the bus, completely out of breath. Pulling out your phone, you dial Jaehyun’s phone number. 

“Hello? Y/N?” You hear Jaehyun’s voice after a couple of rings. 

“Jaehyun!” You greet him. “Where are you? I need to tell you something.”

“Perfect timing! I have something to tell you too.” 

“Let’s meet at the pier, where the cherry blossoms bloomed.” You suggest and you can hear him smile on the other line. 

“Perfect. I’m almost there. I’ll see you!” He chuckles. 

“I’ll see you.”

A couple of minutes pass and you look out the window to see cherry blossom trees. The bus halts to a stop and you rush out, walking fast in search of your best friend. It’s a difficult search because there are too many couples roaming the pier. Just as you’re about to give up and call Jaehyun—

“Y/N!”

You look to your right to see Jaehyun jogging towards you. As the two of you meet halfway, you timidly wave at him. He looks so beautiful with the cherry blossoms behind him. You find yourself staring in awe. 

“What was it that you needed to tell me?” You both ask in unison. 

“You go first.” You insist. 

“Are you sure?” You laugh, playfully hitting his arm. 

“Go first.” 

He bites his lip, a smile threatening to spread across his lips. He looks nervous. His dimples are showing. His ears are extremely red. You feel your heart skip a beat too many. Your heart is beating so fast that you’re afraid he can hear it. 

“I asked Lina to be my girlfriend and she said yes!”

Your smile threatens to fade away. But you don’t even dare let it fall off your face, no matter how shattered your heart is. It’s fascinating how Jaehyun can make your heart beat faster than normal and shatter it into pieces in one day. You’re not sure if you’re happy for him or sad that you just got rejected. 

“O-Oh! That’s—That’s great! Con—Congratulations!” 

Jaehyun notices that your eyes are glassy. He pays no attention to it when you pull him into a tight embrace. You rest your head on his shoulder, blinking away the tears threatening to form in your eyes. He pulls away from the hug. 

“What did you want to tell me?” 

You look up at him. “Oh. It’s nothing. It’s not that important anymore—”

“What? No, you’re lying—”

“Well, I’ve been thinking about starting a photography business. Clara managed to convince me. She might help run it with me.” You tell a white lie. 

“Really?! I’m so proud of you!” He exclaims and pulls you back into another hug. 

You find yourself hugging Jaehyun tighter. It might be because this may be the last time you could hug him. He belongs to someone else now. Your chance is gone. You wish you could blame yourself for being a little too late, but you’re too busy drowning in your sadness. 

A little too late. 

Just a little. 

And you hate being late. 

That night, you find yourself sitting in your bathroom. Hugging your knees to your chest, you let out a soft sob. The fear and vulnerability you feel is that of like a huge bucket of ice cold water being poured on you. Scattered around the bathroom floor are cherry blossom petals. You glance at your camera that’s still turned on, with a candid photo of Jaehyun focused on the viewfinder. 

Everything was starting to make sense. 

From your nauseous episodes to your shortness of breath, it led up to this. Everything feels numb. All you can remember is Jaehyun’s dimply smile and the beautiful cherry blossom trees behind him. You never thought it would come to this. 

In the toilet are cherry blossom petals. You manage to gather yourself and you slowly get up to flush the toilet. You watch all the cherry blossom petals go down the toilet. 

Jaehyun loves cherry blossoms. 

The more you stare at the cherry blossom petals that you’ve thrown up, the more you start to hate them. You’re starting to hate them because it reminds you of your heartbreak, it’s a sign of rejection, and it tells you one thing; Jaehyun’s not in love with you. 

“The invitations came out beautifully!”

You tell Jungwoo who lets out a soft chuckle as you’re showing him your invitation that you had just gotten from your mailbox. He flashes two thumbs up through your laptop screen. Behind him, you spot Clara taking pictures of their newly renovated baby room. 

“Have you heard from Jaehyun, lately? I haven’t seen him since we all met up to finalize the invitations.” 

You ponder on whether you should pretend to have mistakenly hung up on the video call, but you know that Jungwoo wouldn’t buy such a lie. You gnaw on your lip, thinking of an answer to tell him. 

You give up. You shake your head. “I’m sure he’s busy with Lina. They’re dating now.”

“What?” Clara yells, disregarding her photo taking session to join in the conversation. You chuckle lightheartedly. Jungwoo furrows his eyebrows in confusion. “He has a girlfriend now? And it’s not you?”

“Did you want it to be me?” 

“Uh, yes?” Clara answers. She frowns. “Is that why you’ve been looking down lately?”

“Have I?” The couple share a look and nod in reply. It’s true. You’ve been feeling down because of the heartbreak, but you can’t help it. You’ve learned that when you fall in love with someone, you fall hard. However, you’re never ready for the heartbreak. 

“Your crush on Jaehyun is quite obvious, Y/N.” Jungwoo points out. “It just took you longer to realize it.”

“I’m happy for him,” you muster up a smile. “This just means that it isn’t meant to be.”

You’re not meant to be together. You know it from the cherry blossoms that you flush down the toilet. You know it from the sharp pain in your lungs and the breathing attack you have because of it. You know it from how distant Jaehyun has been. You know it because of her.

You won’t ever blame it on her because you have come to the conclusion that you’re not meant for Jaehyun. The cherry blossoms are a sign for you to move on.

“Well, I think you and Jaehyun are perfect for each other.” Clara attempts at convincing you but you barely buy it. “You guys are like two peas in a pod. I can’t see one of you without the other.”

You flash a small smile. Your smile doesn’t reach your eyes and you know that the couple can see how fake your smile is through their laptop screen. 

“He has Lina now. I think that’s what matters. He doesn’t need me anymore.”

“Are you even listening to yourself—”

There’s a knock at the door, interrupting your conversation. You’re not expecting any guests at the hour and you don’t have any packages arriving until tomorrow. As you excuse yourself, you shuffle towards the door to look through the peephole. Standing on the other side of the door is a tall guy, holding up a box in front of his face. You giggle.

“Cha Eunwoo! What are you doing here?”

He moves the box away from his face and beams at you. 

“I decided to pay you a visit! It’s been quite a while since I’ve come over, huh?”

“It feels quite odd having you over.”

Eunwoo quirks an eyebrow. He’s cutting two slices of chocolate cake, one for you and the other for him. Standing right next to him, you pour two glasses of wine for the both of you. 

“What do you mean?” He laughs. 

“You never come over.” You shrug your shoulders. “When you do come over, it’s usually because you’re having girl problems.”

He scoffs. “I do not have girl problems—”

“You do.” You cut him off, looking up at him with a grin. He squints his eyes at you. 

“Now you make it seem like I have this huge issue when it comes to girls and my dating life—”

You stifle a giggle. “But it’s true, though.”

He frowns. “Is it really?”

You nod your head. “Sadly.”

The coffee table is set up lazily with Eunwoo’s cake that he had made for the two of you, along with a bottle of wine that you’ve barely touched since receiving it as a birthday gift. A movie is playing softly in the background as you and Eunwoo catch up with each other’s lives. 

“Have you seen Jaehyun, lately?”

“No. I figured he’d be busy helping out with Jungwoo’s wedding.” Eunwoo replies. “Is he not helping out?”

“Ever since he started dating Lina, he hasn’t been showing up. It’s only been me helping Jungwoo plan out his wedding.” You explain. 

“He’s dating? Since when?”

“Not sure. I haven’t seen him.” You swirl your wine in your glass before taking a huge sip. 

“Shouldn’t you know? I mean, you’re his best friend, his partner in crime. If there was someone who knew him most, it would be you.” He takes a bite of his slice of cake. 

“Surprise?” You chuckle. “I don’t know anything about his current relationship. Sorry to disappoint.”

You start to feel slightly dizzy. You’re not sure if it’s the wine or if you’re experiencing the same symptoms. Within a couple of minutes, your head starts to pound. Eunwoo takes notice of how quiet you’ve gotten, staring at you to make sure everything is alright. You grab your forehead, eyebrows knitting together as your head continues to pound. You feel weak. Seconds later, your lungs start to tighten and your breathing slows down. 

“Y/N. Are you alright?” He asks. 

You try to look up at him but your head feels heavy. You nod your head but he doesn’t believe it. 

“Excuse me,” you whisper as you struggle to get onto your feet. 

The symptoms are showing up again. You’re stumbling on your way to the bathroom. Your lungs feel full, causing you to have trouble breathing. As soon as you reach your bathroom, you bend over the toilet. 

You spend fifteen minutes throwing up cherry blossom petals into the toilet. You’ve been too distracted by your condition to notice that you’ve left the bathroom door open. Eunwoo rushes over to the bathroom and stops in his tracks. 

His eyebrows raise in surprise. What he sees in front of him is all too familiar. Scattered around the floor are petals of a cherry blossom. His eyes travel towards you. You’re bent over the toilet, throwing up petals. He feels his blood run cold. 

“Y/N.”

You cough, sighing with relief. Your lungs finally empty out again. Your headache vanishes. As you lean your restless figure against the wall, you look up to see Eunwoo standing at the doorway. He’s just as surprised as you are. 

He gestures at the petals. “They look… beautiful.”

You fake a smile. 

“But Y/N, my mother went through the same thing.” He confesses. “This all reminds me of her. Instead of the cherry blossoms, she had stargazer lilies.”

“Those must’ve been beautiful,” you mumble. 

He takes a seat next to you. “Who would’ve thought that something so precious, so beautiful, would end up looking like this?”

You fiddle with your fingers. “Eunwoo, can you promise me something?”

“Of course.”

“Don’t tell anyone about this. Not even Jaehyun.” You beg. “He can’t find out.”

The dots were connecting in his head. If you didn’t want Jaehyun to find out about this, this only meant one thing. 

“This is all because of Jaehyun?” His eyes round in shock and you slowly nod your head. He picks up a petal from the floor and analyzes it. 

“Promise me, Eunwoo. Please.”

He tears his gaze from the petal to look at you. Your eyes are filled with sadness. 

“I promise, only if you promise to do something in return.” He insists. 

“What do you want me to do?” 

He places his hand on top of yours. “Please get yourself checked. I’m afraid you have the same condition as my mother.”

You nod. 

“I promise.”

Later that night, Eunwoo helps you book an appointment with a doctor at the local hospital. You can’t help but appreciate the effort Eunwoo has been giving. During the times where you have been going through a lot, you would have expected Jaehyun to be there for you, just like how you were there for him. But t times where you needed Jaehyun the most, he was nowhere to be found. Instead, Eunwoo has been the one who stuck around. 

You can’t help but think that being apart from Jaehyun may be nothing but for the better. 

The first thing you do once you step out of the Doctor’s office is let out the longest, tiring sigh. The next thing you do is stare at a short list of prescribed medications. You let out yet another tiring sigh. Falling in love should be a paid job if it’s getting you all worked up for heartbreak. 

“Y/N?”

It takes you a couple of seconds to realize that your name is being called. The soft voice calling out your name snaps you out of your trance. Standing a couple of metres away is Clara, who looks surprised to see you in the hospital. She looks at the small Doctor’s note with your medications in your hand and slowly looks up at you. Behind you, she reads the sign on your Doctor’s office door. Disease Specialist. When your eyes meet, her gaze transforms from curiosity to concern.

“C-Clara, hey.” You let out a shaky laugh. “What brings you here? Check up? Ultrasound?”

“I’d like to ask you the same thing, what brings you here?” She replies. 

You scratch your neck nervously. “Nothing major. Do you have a ride going home? Is Jungwoo picking you up?”

She nods her head. “You can come with us. We’ll drop you off—”

“I’ll be alright—”

“Y/N, I want you to remember that you can trust me. We’re like sisters, remember?” She says and it’s all that it takes for your eyes to flood with tears. 

“Y-Yeah, like sisters.” You stutter. Your voice cracks and you cover it up with a cough. “I’ll explain everything when we get in the car.”

You don’t explain everything when you get in the car. Instead, the car ride is silent. You find it difficult to bring it up. Jungwoo looks at you through his rearview mirror and he feels Clara tightly squeeze his hand. He glances at her and she gives him a look of doubt.

“S-So,” Jungwoo starts off a conversation. You look away from the scenery of cars driving on the highway outside the window. He smiles at you through his rearview mirror. “The weather’s been really nice today, huh?”

You snort. This is the first time you’ve laughed since last night. In fact, you did not sleep well last night because of the nervousness you were feeling. It’s been a couple of weeks since Eunwoo referred you to a disease specialist when he encountered you and the cherry blossom petals filling up your lungs. But even after the appointment, you still feel nervous. 

“After today’s ultrasound, it’s safe to say that I’m not expecting twins.” Clara sighs with relief. “Imagine how painful delivering two babies in one go would be. Can’t relate.”

The couple continues to talk about the baby and you’re not sure when you can start telling them. You can sense that they’re trying to make you feel better just so that you can feel more comfortable telling them. When their conversation dies down and as Jungwoo turns right into your neighbourhood, you decide to drop the bomb.

“I have an illness.” 

Jungwoo slams on the brakes and Clara scolds him.

“Hanahaki Disease,” you mumble, chuckling bitterly. “Have you heard of it?”

“Y/N…” Clara trails off. She doesn’t believe you. You? Of all people, why did it have to be you? 

“It started when Jaehyun started dating Lina,” you explain. “The breathing attacks, the shortness of breath, the cherry blossom petals. It all led up to this.”

Jungwoo frowns. “Is that what I saw? Those petals lying around on your bathroom floor?”

You nod. There are tears streaming down your cheeks and you wipe them away, one by one. Clara grabs some tissues and hands them over to you. Jungwoo has no words to say.

“All I wanted to do was find love.” You whisper. “But look where it got me. Whenever I see those stupid petals, I feel like this is all wrong, like falling in love is wrong.”

“Falling in love isn’t wrong. It shouldn’t feel wrong.” Clara reassures you. “Whatever feelings you have for Jaehyun, those feelings aren’t wrong and shouldn’t be.”

“Have you perhaps told Jaehyun?” 

You shake your head. “He can’t find out.”

“Why not?” Jungwoo asks. 

“If I tell him, I’ll lose him.” You reply. “I don’t want to lose him.”

“Why did the Doctor say?” Clara asks. 

Clara watches you fall silent, choosing not to answer as you gather your things. You bid them a farewell and thank them for driving you home. As you step inside of your home, you slowly slide down the door.

“From your x-ray, it is safe to say that you have Hanahaki Disease. Have you heard of it before?”

You nod. “My best friend has it.”

“Perfect. I’m assuming you are more familiar with this disease than the average person. Let me give you a quick breakdown.”

Your eyes follow your Doctor who’s pointing at the leftover petals sitting in your lungs at the moment. He points at your x-ray. 

“The reason why you have this disease is solely because of unrequited love. You may have experienced rejection recently or the past couple of months, which resulted in the occupation of cherry blossom petals in your lungs.” He explains.

“How long will I have this disease? Is it curable?” You ask. 

“It’s curable. There are three ways to cure this disease. The first possible cure is if you fall in love with someone else who so happens to return the same feelings. The second cure is if the person who caused your heartbreak falls in love with you, which reverses the unrequited love.”

“And the last possible cure?”

He purses his lips into a tight line. “The last cure is to permanently remove the petals through surgery.”

“Surgery?” He nods his head. 

“Yes. But beware,” he warns. “Once you have surgery, those feelings you once had for that person would be permanently removed as well. You will no longer fall in love with that person anymore.”

“Where’s the bride-to-be?”

All of the ladies turn towards the door to see an unfamiliar woman entering the small restaurant. You turn around and you feel your blood run cold. Lina enters the small restaurant and greets Clara by kissing her cheek. She hands Clara her gift and makes her way towards you. Clara looks at you apologetically.

“Y/N! Nice to see you.” Lina smiles.

Indeed, Lina looks beautiful. She screams Jaehyun’s ideal type. You wish you were as beautiful as her, as charming as her. 

You smile back at her. “Nice to see you too, Lina.”

“I don’t really know anyone here except for you and Clara. Clara invited me last minute, since Jaehyun and I started dating and all.” She explains.

Your eyebrows raise. “Oh, that’s—that’s nice. Why don’t you go ahead and grab something to eat first?”

“Oh, right! I’ll go ahead. Thanks!” She exclaims, grabbing her plate and heading towards the buffet to get food.

Clara approaches you and nudges your side. “I’m sorry, I had to invite her or else Jaehyun would suspect something. Besides, she’s his date to the wedding, it would be awkward if I didn’t invite her to my bridal shower.”

You shrug it off. “It’s alright. I’m not bothered by it at all.”

The evening goes by smoothly and peacefully with Lina sitting right beside you at the table. Clara is busy opening all the bridal shower gifts with a fake veil on the crown of her head. You’re watching Clara as she opens Lina’s gift, and it so happens to be a bonsai. Clara gasps in surprise and rushes over to thank Lina for the gift. 

“It seems like she really likes it,” you chuckle.

“Jaehyun suggested it as a gift.” Lina adds. “Y/N, I’ve been wanting to get close with you, since you’re Jaehyun’s best friend.”

You turn around to face her. “Sure. We can be friends.”

“Jaehyun talks and thinks very highly of you. You’re very special to him, as his best friend. I hope we can be the same. It might be a bit awkward because I abruptly came into his life and everything.” She looks hesitant.

“He does?” You ask. “I am?”

She nods. “I envy you, sometimes, because aside from me, you’re also important to him. I guess it’s just a given, where it’s normal to envy your boyfriend’s best friend who so happens to be a woman.”

“You don’t need to envy me,” you chuckle lightheartedly. You lie. “I don’t have any feelings for him, if that’s what you want to know—”

She cuts you off with a look. “I know you’re in love with Jaehyun.”

Your mouth clamps shut. You’re not close with Lina, therefore, you’re not sure how to react. You analyze her reaction, to see whether she’ll burst out in anger, if she’ll shove you off your chair and start a catfight, or if she’ll peacefully deal with the situation.

“I’m not in love with Jaehyun, I promise you—”

She smiles. “I’m not blind, Y/N. Anyone can see it, even a stranger. The heart never lies.”

You hesitatingly place your hand on hers. “But he’s in love with you, not me. Don’t worry about it, Lina. He’s absolutely in love with you. You should keep your chin up and take care of him.”

Lina looks at you with an expression you can’t read. You were feeling all the symptoms again. Your head was beginning to throb in pain and your arms and legs were starting to feel weak. At this point, you knew when it was going to happen. You excuse yourself, wobbling your way towards the washroom. 

You experience the symptoms whenever you’re around Jaehyun, whenever you’re around Lina, or whenever he’s the one being talked about. Those are the times where you think about Jaehyun the most, and it brings you back to May 2nd where he had indirectly rejected you. Anything that relates to your rejection or unrequited love will trigger your symptoms.

You bend over the toilet and throw up the petals. It’s a large batch this time, you notice. Your lungs feel like they’re on fire. 

Jaehyun steps inside the restaurant venue to pick up his girlfriend when he finds you rushing towards the washroom. You look sick. He grows concerned and shoves his phone back into his pocket. As he heads to the washroom you’re in, he stops in front of the door at the sound of you throwing up. He has a feeling in his gut that he can’t explain, and it urges him to barge into the washroom.

Cherry blossom petals. It’s the first thing he sees. They’re scattered all over the floor. He follows a trail of the petals and it leads him to a stall that’s been left open. He peeks through the stall and he grows pale. 

You’re bent over the toilet, throwing up cherry blossom petals. To be more exact, you’re throwing up petals of his own favourite flower. Only someone with the same exact condition would be able to understand it and connect all the dots.

You’re in love with him.

But he’s not in love with you.

And that’s why you’re throwing up cherry blossom petals.

You have the disease, and it’s all because of his unrequited feelings for you.

He wishes this was just a terrible nightmare.

“Y/N?”

You freeze in your spot. You turn around to see Jaehyun standing at the doorway of the stall. With widened eyes, you try to utter out an explanation but he’s too busy looking at you with shock.

“You have it too?” He whispers. “And it so happens to be cherry blossoms. But you didn’t dare tell me?”

“Jaehyun—”

“How dare you keep this a secret from me?” Anger and a look of betrayal is washed all over his face and you slowly get up from the floor.

“Jaehyun, please just let me explain.” You plead.

“You don’t need to explain. I see it with my own two eyes, Y/N.” 

He shakes his head in disappointment and disbelief, barging out of the washroom. You take off your heels and chase after him. As Jaehyun steps out of the washroom, he walks past Jungwoo. He looks at Jaehyun confusedly.

“Jaehyun?” Jungwoo watches as you chase after Jaehyun.

“Jaehyun, wait!”

Jungwoo is completely speechless as he watches Jaehyun storm out of the restaurant. Jaehyun feels like his world is spinning. His thoughts are clouded that he barely notices the heavy rain that’s slowly drenching his clothes. He’s not sure what to do except run, run far away. But he hears you calling out his name.

“Jaehyun, let me explain!”

He stops in his tracks and slowly turns around to face you. It is only when he sees you that he realizes that it’s raining. “How could you do this to me?”

Your tears blend in with the rain that’s dripping down your face. “I was going to tell you after I told Clara and Jungwoo—”

“Tell me what, that you’re in love with me? That I’m the reason for those cherry blossoms?” He cuts you off, letting out a bitter chuckle. “Don’t you think it’s a bit too late, Y/N? I feel like you betrayed me. Everyone knew except me—”

“I didn’t tell you because I know you’re in love with her.” You explain. “I thought that if I told you, you’d end up leaving me.”

“Were you supposed to tell me all of this that day we met up? When I told you that Lina and I started dating?” He asks and you’re too afraid to answer. He lets out a frustrated sigh. “You’re afraid to lose me but the moment you kept all of this a secret from me, was when you started to lose me.”

“Jaehyun, I’m sorry—”

He shakes his head. “I can’t return the same feelings for you, Y/N. You’re my best friend. But I don’t think being your best friend would be good for you.”

“No, Jaehyun, we can work things out—”

“We can’t work things out, Y/N.” He cuts you off. “Just leave me alone. I don’t think I could ever trust you anymore. It’ll be the best for the both of us.”

“Jaehyun,” you beg, reaching out to him. You grab his hand but he shakes your hand off.

“I don’t want to see you ever again.”

It’s almost like you lost your voice. As Jaehyun hops into his car, his headlights blind you before he drives off. You feel yourself fall to your knees, your sobs getting louder and louder. Jungwoo steps out of the restaurant and stands underneath a roof to find you crying your heart out. Clara rushes outside to get you back inside the restaurant. Jungwoo knows that the sound of your loud cries will haunt him forever. 

Jungwoo sighs.

This didn’t end well.

1 ½  years later…

“You chose the perfect place!”

You smile, clinking glasses with Clara. As you overlook the exhibit, you take a sip of your champagne. You would have never thought your life would transform into something different within one year. But here you are, one year later, running an exhibit for your photographs. There are visitors of different professions, some are art students, others are fellow photographers. 

Someone clears their throat. You turn around, seeing Eunwoo. You eye the bouquet of gardenia and sweet pea in his arms. 

“Congratulations on your exhibit.” He hands you the bouquet and you chuckle. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“I was wondering why you were late,” you mumble, sniffing the flowers. “Thanks for the flowers, they look lovely.”

“No problem. I’m really proud of you, Y/N—”

“Y/N? We have a bid for one of your photographs.” Your personal secretary, Hyejeong, interrupts the conversation. You raise an eyebrow in surprise. “He wants to meet you.”

“Sure,” you nod your head. You give Eunwoo an apologetic look. “Sorry. I’ll talk to you right after meeting the bidder!”

He waves it off. “No worries. Take all the time you need. I’m not going anywhere.”

As you follow Hyejeong, you carry the bouquet in your arms. There are fellow photographers greeting and congratulating you, and you feel heat rush to your cheeks by the sudden attention. Hyejeong leads you to the far end of the exhibit. You feel your pace slow down. 

“He’s right there.” She points at the bidder.

You follow her gaze and it falls upon a man. Just from the sight of his back, you know exactly who the man is. A lot can happen in a year, and it’s evident through his hair that’s dyed a blue-black, even through his drastic change of fashion. He looks more mature. 

You let out a breath. “You can leave us, Hyejeong. I’m sure Clara needs you to help her entertain the visitors.”

She nods her head. “Let me know if you need me.”

As she leaves you and the bidder alone, you feel your grasp on your bouquet begin to tighten. You approach the man who seems to feel your presence. He turns around and a gasp is caught in your throat.

You gather yourself together. “Can I help you with anything?”

Jaehyun stares at you in shock. You’ve changed. Your hair is no longer long, for it’s cut short and stops right at your shoulders. You look more composed. You no longer look shy and introverted. But you look beautiful. 

You look so beautiful that it hurts him.

“R-Right—” He stutters and points at the photograph behind him. “I’d like to make a bid.”

You look at the photograph he’s pointing at. It’s a photograph of him. You had taken that photo of him during Jungwoo and Clara’s prenuptial photoshoot. He’s standing in the field of sunflowers with his arms stretched out. You named the photograph, Renewal, because it was the first time Jaehyun had overcome his hatred of flowers. 

You purse your lips into a tight line. “I’d like to have you know that photographs on this side of the exhibit are not up for auction. Did you not read the notice before entering the exhibit, sir?”

He scratches the back of his neck. He eyes the bouquet in your arms. “Is that so? Sorry about that, I guess I’ll keep on looking.”

“Sure.” You mumble. “Now, if you’ll excuse me—”

“Y/N.”

You quirk an eyebrow. “Yes?”

He hesitantly smiles. You barely budge an inch and your expression remains blank. 

“It’s nice to see you. It’s nice to see you doing well.” He says with a hopeful gaze.

You nod your head and you prepare to say something extremely harsh, no matter how warm his smile is. You can’t let your guard down. You have every right to be mad at him. 

“I wish I could say the same to you. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have other clients to speak to.”

As you turn around, you feel your heart ache. Jaehyun watches you walk away from him, and he’s completely astonished. He expected this. He expected you to be coldhearted towards him and it’s all his fault. He acknowledges it, but he wasn’t prepared to see it happen right in front of him. 

You’ve changed. A year is more than enough to change someone, for better or for worse. But after seeing you, he’s not sure if time has changed you... or if he himself changed you. 

It was a couple of months ago where you were cured of the disease. You no longer threw up cherry blossom petals, and you were no longer experiencing the symptoms. The reason for your cure remains unknown. It could be that an unrequited lover has fallen in love with you or you have fallen in love with someone else who so happens to return your feelings. You’d like to think it was the latter. 

You don’t believe in the idea of unrequited lovers realizing their undying love for you, especially when it’s too late. That only happens in fairytale stories. 

“My date is looking beautiful tonight.” You hear Eunwoo say as he joins you out on the balcony. You giggle, rolling your eyes at him. 

Jungkook had just gotten married a couple of hours ago. You’re sure that he’s probably wasted on the dance floor with his wife scolding him for getting too drunk with their guests around. You feel a bit tipsy yourself after having a couple of glasses of wine. You decided to get some fresh air, not expecting your date, Eunwoo, to join you. You figured Eunwoo would be getting wasted with his newly-wedded friend. Guess not.

“I guess we’re the last ones who need to find fiances.” He sighs, sipping his wine. 

“Don’t even think about proposing to me, Eunwoo.” You mutter. “I don’t plan on getting diabetes because of all the sweets you’ll bake for me.”

He laughs. “Well, if I were to be honest with you, I did fall in love with you at some point.”

“You have?” You raise an eyebrow, surprised. “You should’ve told me. I would’ve dated you in a heartbeat.”

“You would?” He asks, surprised. You nod. “Wow, this truly tells me we’re not destined to be together. My timing was quite off. The Eunwoo a year ago should’ve just confessed.”

You smirk. “There’s no such thing as second chances, Eunwoo, so don’t even think about shooting your shot with me again. It’s not going to happen.”

“I liked you a lot, Y/N. But it looked like you were so in love with Jaehyun, so I didn’t bother. What’s even more funny was that I lied about having a girlfriend to see if you’d get jealous, but you barely reacted.” He reminisces, and the two of you share a good laugh together.

All this time, Eunwoo had proclaimed that he was officially off the market. Who knew that he did it just to earn some sort of jealous reaction from you? His timing was definitely off. 

You pat his shoulder. “You’ll find someone special. You just have to wait a bit longer.”

Eunwoo doesn’t reply and you look up at him questioningly. He’s looking at someone at the door. You follow his gaze and you let out a tiring sigh. Eunwoo glances at you and pats your back.

“I’ll head back inside, alright?” He insists. “Call me if you need anything.”

Eunwoo passes by Jaehyun, who’s standing at the door. The two of them glance at each other for a brief moment before Eunwoo tears his gaze. You look at Jaehyun for a brief moment before downing your glass of wine. You wince, the wine no longer tastes fruity and sweet, it tastes bitter. 

“Are you following me?” You ask him, turning away from him to look up at the night sky. It takes him a couple of seconds to stand a metre away from you. 

“I just wanted to talk to you.” Jaehyun says softly.

You scoff. “What is there to talk about?”

“Us.”

He sees you roll your eyes. “There was never an ‘us’. I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

“Are you just going to ignore the fact that you were in love with me?” He dives straight to the point. “Are you still in love with me?”

Are you still in love with me? You chuckle bitterly, turning around to face him. You look over his shoulder to find a butler to fetch. You need another glass of wine. 

“Would my answer matter to you?” You argue back. “Last time I checked, you left me for her.”

“It was a mistake—”

“By the way,” you muster up a smile. “How are you guys? Is the relationship going well? I wouldn’t know, it’s been a while since you left.”

“We broke up.” He answers, and it comes out barely above a whisper. 

A butler finally comes around and hands you a glass of wine. You grab an extra glass for him. He doesn’t budge, looking quite astonished and speechless. You shrug your shoulders, placing it back on the butler’s tray.

“How sad,” you say. “Didn’t you tell me that she was the one?”

“Look, Y/N, I’m in love with—”

You close your eyes and cut him off with a sigh. “How long has it been? A year? Since you left me out there in the rain? I still remember that night. You must’ve forgotten because here you are, trying to befriend me again.”

Jaehyun remembers that night so vividly. He remembers how shattered he left you. But most of all, he remembers how guilty he felt for pushing you away. If he had the chance to turn back time, he’d do things much more differently.

“Well, I should get going. It was nice seeing you again, Jaehyun.” You fake a smile and he can see through it. You’re not happy, not the slightest bit. 

“Y/N—”

“And I hope this is the last time I’ll see you.”

Are you still in love with me? That’s a question you feared the most. It terrifies you because yes, you’re still in love with Jaehyun. You don’t see yourself being with anyone else. No matter how much he hurt you, you’re still in love with him. No matter how much he doesn’t deserve you, you’re still in love with him.

And that in of itself is more than enough to ruin your life.

Jaehyun is stubborn. 

He finds himself standing in front of your exhibition. This time, your exhibition is in a different city. He made the extra effort to drive to a different city in hopes of seeing you again. You may hate him for this, but he knew that he owed you an explanation. And if it was going to take many tries to get through to you, he would do it. He would do it in a heartbeat.

“One admission ticket for Y/N’s exhibition, please.” 

This time around, he didn’t show up empty-handed. He stopped by a flower shop a couple of blocks away from the gallery to pick up a fresh bouquet of—

“You saw the exhibit back in Seoul, but you’re here in Busan to see it again?” 

You’re standing in front of one of your photographs with your back facing him. He looks at the photograph, it’s a photo of Jungwoo and Clara’s shadows shown on the pavement. He can clearly make out that the photo was taken after their wedding for Clara’s shadows perfectly show a veil sitting on the crown of her head and the skirt of her dress. 

You turn around. “Cat bit your tongue?”

He hesitatingly approaches you, handing you the bouquet of flowers. You quirk an eyebrow. It’s a bouquet of violet lilacs, your favourite flower. 

“I know you hoped that our paths wouldn’t cross again but—”

“Thanks for the flowers.” You cut him off, gently grabbing the flowers from his hands. You take a quick sniff of the flowers and a smile threatens to form on your lips. But you’re quick to stop it. 

“Oh, hello there, stranger.”

The two of you spot Jungwoo, who’s entering the exhibition with his wife, Clara. Jungwoo feels a bit wary with Jaehyun being near you, and it’s evident with the lines on his forehead. Clara looks at you for reassurance and you bite your lip. 

“Long time, no see.” Jaehyun mumbles. 

“I was wondering where you ran off to after our wedding—ow!” Jungwoo’s sentence is cut short when Clara elbows him in the stomach. 

Clara fakes a smile. “Nice seeing you, Jaehyun. Of all places I’d expect myself to bump into you, I didn’t expect it to be at Y/N’s exhibit.”

Jaehyun barely utters a word. The atmosphere excuses nothing but awkwardness and tension. You clear your throat. 

“Did you drive all the way from Seoul to Busan?” Jungwoo asks him. 

He shakes his head. “I took the train.”

“Do you need a ride going home? We can drive you home, after you stroll around, of course.” Clara offers. 

“Clara,” you hiss through your teeth. 

“If you don’t mind,” Jaehyun says sheepishly. “I hope I’m not a bother—”

“Oh, you’re definitely not a bother.” You say sarcastically. As you let out a sigh, you hand Clara the bouquet of lilacs. “Excuse me, I have some visitors to speak to.”

Clara watches you as you walk away, leaving the three of them. “Y/N—” 

As the three of them are left behind, Clara’s shoulders slump in defeat and turns around to face the other two. She puts on her sunglasses and slings her bag over her shoulder.

“Want to grab a cup of coffee with us?” Clara asks Jaehyun.

He purses his lips into a tight line. “Sure.”

Jungwoo snorts. “Great. I could definitely use an espresso shot right now.”

The couple lead the way, leaving Jaehyun following closely behind. He looks over his shoulder to see you talking with one of the visitors. You have a warm smile on your face. It’s a smile he misses so much. He misses the times where you’d smile because of him. 

But now, he’s the reason for all your frowns. 

“I apologize for Y/N’s… behaviour.”

Jaehyun places down his cup of coffee onto the table. Seated across from him are Jungwoo and Clara. He waves it off. “You don’t need to. I kind of expected her to be like that, especially towards me.”

Jungwoo scoffs. “As you should.”

“Look,” Jaehyun begins. He wraps his hands around the warm mug of coffee. He avoids their gaze, but he feels the two of them burning holes through his head. “I regret everything. I deserve all of this. But all I want is for her to forgive me.”

“Are you sure that’s all you want from her?” Clara asks. “A second chance?”

“I think I have a better chance at being her best friend again. But a chance at being a lover? I’m not too sure.” Jaehyun confesses.

Jungwoo and Clara share a look. Clara takes a sip of her tea, completely surprised by the subtle confession. She clears her throat. “You’re in love with Y/N?”

Jaehyun nods his head. “I think I’ve always been in love with her.”

“Took you long to realize it.” Jungwoo smiles. “But I think you’re a bit too late.”

Jaehyun raises an eyebrow. “You really think I don’t have a chance?”

“Y/N gave up on love a long time ago.” Clara says truthfully. “But there may be a sliver of hope. That is, if you’re persistent enough to keep up with her. If you keep it up, she may give you a second chance. But once you give up, she’ll probably hate you forever.”

Jungwoo smirks. “You act like you don’t know Y/N, Jaehyun. I’m sure she’s still in love with you. All you have to do is show her that you’re in love with her. She can’t resist you.”

“You think so?”

“Y/N’s been your best friend for the longest time. It won’t take much to break down her walls again, especially if the one to tear down her walls is you.” Clara reassures him.

“Wait, when did you realize it?” Jungwoo asks. 

“Realize what?”

“That you’re in love with her.” Jungwoo mumbles.

“Seven months ago? I was on the search for her seven months ago.” Jaehyun replies while scratching the back of his head. 

Jungwoo looks at his wife. She looks back at him and he watches as the gears start to turn in her head. It’s not long until she finally figures it out. Jaehyun stares at the two of them communicate with their eyes.

Clara looks at Jaehyun. “You may have a huge chance, Jaehyun.”

Seven months. 

When Jaehyun started to fall in love with you seven months ago, you had just found out that you had been completely cured of the disease. 

“Text us when you get home!”

Jaehyun waves at Jungwoo and Clara, who dropped him off at a bus stop near his home. In a rush, they were only able to drop Jaehyun off at a bus stop because they had to pick up their daughter from the babysitter. He watches their car get smaller and smaller as it travels farther down the road. He looks up at the sky, and a raindrop falls onto his cheek. Suddenly, the raindrops start to fall more frequently. He clicks his tongue.

“I should make a run for it,” he says to himself, beginning to walk down the sidewalk.

It starts to rain. He starts jogging down the sidewalk when the rain gets heavier and heavier. But he’s completely out of shape and finds himself opting to walk in the heavy rain instead. His clothes are soaking wet, and all the people walking past him don’t bother offering an umbrella. As soon as he spots a convenience store, he hears a loud honk. He glances to his left to see an unfamiliar car parked by the curb. 

The window rolls down to reveal you. You look at him with concern.

“Get in. I’ll drive you home.” You insist.

“I’ll be fine, I don’t want to be a bother—”

“Just get in or else I’m leaving you here.” You cut him off. “Take it or leave it.”

He hesitatingly walks to your car and hops into the passenger’s seat. You drive off. The ride is silent, and he distracts himself from the lit-up signs and billboards. You remember where he lives. He would have expected you to completely shut him out of your life, where you would even forget his address. But you remembered.

“How could you not have an umbrella on you? Did you not hear the forecast today?”

He looks away from the window. You’re focused on the road. Your expression remains the same; completely blank. He doesn’t say anything.

“Look at you, you’re completely wet.” You mutter to yourself. A smile threatens to spread across his lips. You care. You care about him, even if it was just a slight bit. “Great. Now my car seat is completely wet too. So much for maintaining a clean car.”

He probably looks like a fool for smiling at you. You tear your gaze away from the road when you reach a red stoplight. When you look at him, he quickly looks away. You can feel your heart ramming in your chest. 

“Thanks for driving me home.” He says in advance. 

The stoplight turns green. You step on the gas, mumbling, “It’s nothing.”

It’s a complete lie. You decided to visit your old place, maybe drop by the nearby convenience store to eat a nice hot, steaming cup of ramen. But you didn’t expect to park by the curb, only to find Jaehyun ready to walk inside after walking in the heavy rain. The sight of Jaehyun’s wet hair and clothes made you feel bad. 

As you park your car, you glance at Jaehyun who’s fallen asleep. He shivers in his sleep and it immediately makes you check his temperature. Surely enough, Jaehyun has a slight fever that will probably last the entire night after getting soaked by the rain. You sigh, turning off the engine of your car.

“Jaehyun.” You nudge him awake. He rubs his eyes and you notice how he’s beginning to shiver. “Give me the keys to your house.”

“Huh—”

“You have a slight fever.”

“I can take care of it myself, don’t worry—”

“Knowing you, you are incapable of looking after yourself. Hand me the keys.” You extend your open hand out to him and he fishes his keys in his pocket. “Let’s head inside.”

As you support Jaehyun on the walk inside, you notice how his body leans comfortably onto your side. He leans in closer to your warmth. As you jam his keys into the lock, you swing the door open for the both of you. 

“Geez, you’re heavy.” You say with a grunt. You reach up to feel his forehead and indeed, his fever is getting worse. “Let’s get you to your bed.”

Thankfully enough, he’s brought to his bed in one piece. You dust your hands off, walking into his bathroom to prepare a damp cloth for his forehead. Jaehyun’s teeth clatter as he shivers on his bed. Through hooded eyes, he sees you wringing a cloth in his bathroom. You place the cloth along with a bowl of water on top of his bedside table and grab a pair of pajamas from his drawers. 

“Could you do me one favour and change into these? I’ll be outside. Call me when you’re done changing.”

And so you find yourself standing outside of his bedroom. Your eyes linger across his living room until they stop at one of the walls. The wall is decorated with a collection of Polaroid pictures. Curiosity gets the best of you and you get closer to the Polaroid wall to get a better look at the pictures. 

The first picture at the top left of the wall is a picture of Jaehyun and Jungwoo. They’re holding up a peace sign. It’s the first Polaroid picture Jaehyun took with the Polaroid camera you gifted him for his birthday. As your eyes scan the pictures from left to right, you start to notice how they’re all pictures of.. you. 

You shake your head, shrugging off your thoughts. You turn your back against the wall, but his coffee table grabs your attention. On his coffee table, there’s a couple of advertisement flyers. They’re flyers of your photography exhibit. 

“This can’t be,” you whisper to yourself. 

Your feet drag you to his kitchen. On his fridge, you spot a couple of notes you’ve written and left for him. From reminders to small words of encouragement, your handwriting is found all over the notes. It’s noticeable how old the notes are, for some of the adhesive is wearing out, causing the corners of the sticky-note to peel off. 

Everywhere in his home, Jaehyun has a reminder of you. Even after a year and a half, he never once pushed you out of his life. But he offered to walk out of yours himself.

But why did he hurt you? Why did he leave you? Why did it take him one year?

Your eyes well up with tears. Suddenly, you hear Jaehyun open the door and call out your name. You turn your back against him to quickly wipe your tears. 

“Coming.” You mumble. You sniff softly, gathering yourself together. 

And right before you enter Jaehyun’s bedroom, you look back at the Polaroid wall one last time. 

While you thought Jaehyun walked out of your life for good, you somehow remained in his life through memories.  

The cafe is busy with university students rushing in and out with their caffeine boost. You almost bump into one. Seated at a table for two, your eyes meet Lina. She flashes you a small smile, sending you a wave. The beat of your heart speeds up out of nervousness. 

“I didn’t think you would come.”

You bite your lip. “Me either.”

“Look—”

“You’re getting married?” You cut her off. She avoids your gaze, slowly nodding her head. You take out the invitation she had mailed to you. You read the names on the invitation. “Does Jaehyun know?”

“He knows—”

“And how does he feel about it?” You question. “I hope you didn’t hurt his feelings. He was very much in love with you, Lina—”

“Jaehyun and I dated for four months, Y/N.” She tells you the truth and you look at her confusedly. “We broke up because of you.”

“W-What?” You stutter. 

“Two months into the relationship, I started to notice how important you are to him. Everything we did reminded him of you. I was starting to question whether he was in love with me or not because all he did was talk about you.” She explains. “Y/N this, Y/N that. But I brushed it off, and I let it drag on for another two months.”

“He told me that you were the one,” you shake your head in disbelief. “We were all sure that the two of you would end up together—”

“Jaehyun’s in love with you.” She gets straight to the point. “You deserve him. He deserves you. I mean, after you got my invitation, the first person that came to your mind was not you, but Jaehyun. I hope you’re still in love with him, Y/N.”

She was right. After you received the invitation, the first person you thought of was Jaehyun. You wondered if he was heartbroken by the news of her engagement. You wondered if he was taking it easy, if he was doing alright. 

“I hope you can come to my wedding, Y/N.” She smiles. “Although we’re on awkward terms, it would be nice to have you attend. I still consider you as someone I’d like to be friends with.”

“I’ll think about it,” you purse your lips into a line. “Thank you for even thinking about inviting me.”

“I hope you’ll get the closure you need.”

Jungwoo pulls up to the venue, parking his car and turning off the engine. He’s never felt so nervous for a best friend. He looks at you through his rearview mirror. You’re anxious. There are strangers dressed up in suits and dresses, all huddled up in groups outside of the venue. They’re most likely long-time friends of Lina and her soon-to-be husband. 

“Are you sure you will be alright on your own?” You tear your gaze from a couple who are taking a selfie. 

You smile. “I’ll be alright. If anything, I’ll call you.”

You feel awkward standing by yourself. Jungwoo had already left you after giving you one last peptalk. You decide to head inside the venue to wait for the couple to arrive. The venue is beautiful. Their wedding theme so happens to be a backyard wedding, making their guests feel more comfortable. You can tell that they wanted a more home-y concept for their wedding. It’s shown through the white chairs scattered across the grass, the rose petals spread across the aisles, and the right amount of candles lit around the perimeter. 

“It’s beautiful, huh?” 

Jaehyun shoves his hands inside his pockets and looks around the venue. You grow confused, turning around to see him standing a couple of metres away. 

“You were invited too?” You ask and he nods his head.

He chuckles. “I actually don’t know anyone here except you.”

From the corner of your eye, you can see him stand next to you. He has the sudden urge to hold your hand, but he knows that it wouldn’t be a good idea to do. You’re afraid that he can hear your heart that’s beating tremendously loud and fast. Little did you know, the two of you are standing in the middle of the aisle that leads up to the front, where the groom and bride are to be wedded. Oh, how Jaehyun wishes that he’d be standing at the front to watch you walk down the aisle for him.

“I don’t know anyone here except you,” you say. 

He glances at you. “Can we at least be friends just for today? I don’t think I’ll be able to handle being on my own.”

You snort. “Last time I checked, you told me to stay away from you. Now you’re asking me to be friends with you for a day?”

“I’m just taking my chances.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Besides, I regret everything I said to you that night.”

“Rightfully so,” you mumble. You face him. “Fine. But once this day is over, I want you to do one thing for me.”

“Sure.”

You fold your arms. “Stay away from me. I don’t want to see you ever again.”

He stares at you for a brief moment. You look beautiful. You’re wearing a long lavender purple dress that stops just above your ankles. It’s an off-shoulder dress, and you style it up by wearing stacked gold necklaces. 

He extends his hand out for you to seal the deal.

“Deal.”

The wedding was everything you expected it to be. Lina and her husband have been best friends since they were in diapers, and it was a given that they would end up together. It made you wonder how your life would’ve been different if Jaehyun was in love with you and if he returned the same feelings you have for him. 

You wish the night would be over, where you could lay down on your bed and hibernate for a couple of months. You’re not into social interaction, especially with people you barely know. It was a shame that you and Jaehyun were assigned to sit at a table with complete strangers. At this point, you’re depending on Jaehyun to spice up your night by keeping you company.

“Y/N,” he nudges you as the lights in the hall start to dim. “Do you hear that?”

“Hear what?”

“It’s our favourite song.” He smiles. 

You listen carefully and indeed, it is your favourite song. A smile threatens to spread across your lips. As Daniel Caesar’s ‘Best Part’ starts to play, you feel yourself go back to prom night. You had been stood up by your date and Jaehyun found you sitting outside of the venue all alone. He had offered to be your date for the last couple of hours of prom night. A smile forms on your lips when you remember Jaehyun playing this song and offering to dance with you.

“Shall we dance?”

You’re brought back to reality. You glance at him. He looks back at you with a look you can’t read. His eyes are trying to tell you something, but you can’t make out what he wants to tell you. 

“Will it be good for me?” 

“We won’t know until we try.” 

And so you both try. On the dance floor with many other couples, Jaehyun grabs your hand and your fingers interlock. Your hands fit perfectly together. He places his hands on your waist and you carefully place yours on his shoulders. He’s standing so close to you, you could feel his hot breath hit your skin. 

“I don’t remember if I told you how beautiful you look,” he says softly.

You blink. “Thanks. You don’t look too bad yourself.”

Jaehyun’s eyes trail down to your plump lips. You look away from him. The song is so intimate and holds a memory that you wish to forget. As the song comes to an end, your eyes meet Jaehyun’s one last time. Before you could process it, he’s slowly leaning in. His lips brush yours and you’re so close to getting carried away by pulling him closer. 

But you catch yourself right on time. Before the kiss gets passionate, you pull away by pushing his chest. He looks completely surprised. You touch your lips, shaking your head.

“This is wrong—”

“Y/N—”

“Stay away from me.” You warn him. “Stay right there. Don’t follow me.”

Out of shock, you barge out of the reception venue. Your eyes are tearing up. You told yourself that you’re never going to fall in love again. You gave up on love a long time ago, but all it takes is one look from him and you’re doomed—

“Y/N.”

You slowly look over your shoulder to see Jaehyun standing at the door, out of breath. He had chased you. 

“This was a bad idea. I knew it was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have—”

“Y/N, I’m in love with you.” He confesses. You turn your back towards him. “You don’t know how long I’ve been wanting to tell you that. Seven months, Y/N. Seven months of—”

“Those pictures of us in your living room. Why do you still have them?” 

“Because I can’t bring myself to throwing them out. They’re precious memories, Y/N. I kept them because it’s the only thing I have left that reminds me of you.” He explains.

Tears start streaming down your cheeks and you let out a scoff as you wipe them away. “Why am I like this around you? I hate being like this. Whenever it comes to you, I find himself going back to you when I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t be in love with you—”

“I—”

“Jaehyun, you’ve had six relationships. You endured your sickness for six relationships and you didn’t fight it alone because I was there. I was there because I chose to stay.” You will yourself to turn around and look at him. He looks broken. “But when the tables turn and I fall in love for the first time, when I need you the most, you leave me. In fact, you left me for her.”

“You have every right to hate me,” he whispers.

“I was fighting all alone.” You bite your quivering lip. “Jungwoo got married. Jungkook got married. Eunwoo is planning on proposing to his girlfriend. And me? I’m still fighting on my own. I’m still in love with you when I clearly shouldn’t be.”

“Please, Y/N—”

“I’m tired of being in love with you.” He looks at you with hopeless eyes. “If you really love me, you would do me a favour and leave me alone. Isn’t that what you told me to do in the first place? Leave you alone?”

Jaehyun doesn’t know what to say. You look exactly how you looked that night he left you. You’re still broken. You’re still not over him. 

“Y/N—”

“You sealed the deal earlier, right? When I told you that I hope I’ll never see you again, I meant it. I don’t want to ever see you again. It’ll be the best for me.”

He’s completely speechless and you take it as your cue to leave when Jungwoo pulls up in the parking lot. Jungwoo looks concerned from his seat in the car. Just as you’re about to leave, Jaehyun says your name one last time. You look at him over your shoulder. There are tears streaming down his cheeks. 

“I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

He’s selfish. 

“Fine.” You mutter. “Have it your way.”

“If fate thinks we’re destined to be together, I hope you’ll know where to find me.”

“Stop skipping your meals and eat.”

It’s been weeks since Lina’s wedding. It’s been weeks since you last saw Jaehyun standing in front of you, broken and hopeless. You haven’t been doing great. In fact, you’ve been feeling horrible. You feel like your heart has been run over ten times and back. You’re not sure what to feel, but Jaehyun’s voice confessing his love for you echoes through your head every now and then. 

You toss a tissue into the trash can. “Jungwoo, shouldn’t you be picking up your daughter from the babysitter?”

“I asked if she could stay a bit more. I can’t just leave you here looking like this, Clara will kill me if she finds out.” Jungwoo frowns. “Could you please just take care of yourself?”

“I’m not in the mood to eat, if that’s what you were wondering.”

“Stop being stubborn.” Jungwoo says sternly.

He looks around your room and his eyes fall upon a framed picture sitting on your bedside table. He squints his eyes to get a clearer view of the picture. It’s a picture of you and Jaehyun from prom night. He has his arm thrown over your shoulder. The two of you are standing close to each other, pulling off your funniest face. 

“Hey,” he says, nodding his head at the picture. “You still have that? You kept it all this time?”

You follow his gaze and it lands on the picture of you and Jaehyun. “Oh, I forgot to throw it out—”

“Don’t even try to lie. I know you can’t bring yourself to throwing it out.” Jungwoo interrupts you.

“Stop reminding me of how deeply in love I am with Jaehyun when I shouldn’t be.” You plead. “I didn’t ask to be reminded of him—”

“Why are you stopping yourself from wanting what your heart wants?” 

You fall silent.

“Your heart wants Jaehyun. You can’t change your heart’s mind because your heart has no mind.” Jungwoo explains.

“You have a point. But still,” you shake your head. “I am not going to give up on a year’s worth of moving on.”

“But you never truly moved on if you’re still in love with him, Y/N. It’s been a year and you’re still in love with him. Besides, he’s in love with you. Shouldn’t you just give him a second chance?

“No.”

“God, you’re so stubborn.” Jungwoo sighs. 

“He’s the reason for those stupid cherry blossoms and that stupid disease—”

“Y/N, there’s something Clara and I wanted to tell you in relation to that.” Jungwoo says and looks like he’s just realized something. “When we took Jaehyun out for a cup of coffee—”

“I don’t want to hear it—”

“Just listen!” He exclaims as you cover your ears with your hands. You can still hear him, unfortunately. “He told us that he realized his feelings for you seven months ago.”

“So?” You raise an eyebrow.

His shoulders slump. “Didn’t you get cured of the disease seven months—”

“Wait.” You cut him off. Your hands slowly uncover your ears. “What did he say?”

“Jaehyun told us that he realized his feelings for you seven months ago.” Jungwoo repeats himself and he sees the gears start to turn in your head. “Seven months ago, Y/N. Didn’t you get cured of the disease—”

“Seven months ago.” You finish it for him. “Holy shit.”

The first possible cure to your disease is if you fall in love with someone else, who happens to return the same feelings. That cure rules out because you’ve never fallen in love after Jaehyun. 

The second possible cure to your disease is by surgically removing the petals itself. You decided not to get the procedure done because your feelings would be compromised and there was a chance that you would never fall in love again.

The third and last cure to your disease is if your unrequited lover happens to fall in love with you, reversing the unrequited love. 

Jaehyun fell in love with you seven months ago. At the same time, you were cured of the disease.

Holy shit.

“You said you were picking up your daughter, right?” You say, in complete shock. “Start your car. I need you to drive me somewhere.”

As you and Jungwoo hop into the car, there’s only one person you have in mind. It’s Jaehyun. As Jungwoo drives down the road, you look out the window. Your first place to find Jaehyun is your exhibition. He’s always been there just to look for you. 

Jungwoo stares at the cherry blossoms lined up on the sidewalk. “The cherry blossoms bloomed beautifully, huh?”

You nod your head. “Yeah, focus on your driving.”

Jungwoo chuckles. 

He parks in front of the exhibition and you don’t hesitate on getting out of the car. The security guard greets you and you rush into the exhibition. Your eyes scan the room. He’s not in sight. You sigh, running your hands through your hair.

“If fate thinks we’re destined to be together, I hope you’ll know where to find me.”

You finally realize it.

“God, why do you have to be so complicated, Jaehyun?”

Jungwoo finds you rushing out of the exhibition. You’re starting to jog down the sidewalk and he looks at you confusedly. He hops out of the car and calls out your name.

“Y/N! Where are you going?”

You stop in your tracks, turning around. “I think I know where he is. Thanks for the ride!”

Jungwoo smiles. “You’ll figure it out.”

You look up at the cherry blossom trees. There are petals slowly falling down. You glance down at your phone and coincidentally enough, it’s May 2nd. You continue to jog down the sidewalk, turning a left and a right. Finding Jaehyun is harder than you thought, especially when there are couples scattered down the strip of the road. 

Jaehyun steps out of the cafe with an iced americano in his hand. He looks up at the cherry blossom trees and a smile starts to form on his lips. It’s a beautiful day, he thinks to himself. But it’ll be much more beautiful if he sees you—

“Y/N?” He spots you jogging down the sidewalk across the street. 

You’re stopping at each shop and cafe to look through the window. You’re checking to see if Jaehyun is in any of the shops. Unknowingly, Jaehyun is crossing the street to chase after you. You’re walking way too fast, Jaehyun notes. You’re crossing the road that’s slowly coming to an end. You’re ready to give up at this point. 

As you reach the end of the road, you let out a sigh of defeat. You hunch over, trying to catch your breath. 

“Y/N?” You hear a voice.

You straighten up your posture, turning around to see Jaehyun standing behind you. He’s completely out of breath and he lets out a breathless laugh. You look at him with doe-eyes.

“You walk so fast, I was hoping you’d slow down—oof! Oh, alright.” He says as you crush him in a huge hug. 

You pull away from the hug to whack his arm. “Why were you so vague with your hint? I spent a whole ass hour trying to look for you—”

“You were looking for me?” He blushes. 

“Yeah,” you mumble. “Sorry, I just—”

“The cherry blossoms bloomed perfectly, don’t you think?” He cuts you off, gesturing towards the tree hovering over the both of you. 

“Yeah, it did.” You say softly, scratching the back of your neck. Why do you suddenly feel so nervous around him? “It was nice seeing you, I should probably get going—”

“You’re leaving already?” 

You slowly nod your head. “I—I just wanted to say hi. That’s all. I’ll see you around, Jaehyun.”

You’re too nervous to tell him. You feel like you’ll get rejected again. As you turn around, you feel his hand grab your wrist, pulling you back. You look up at him with hopeful eyes.

“You’re leaving right after you found me?” He asks. 

“I don’t know what to tell you, Jaehyun.” You say softly. 

“You’re not going to tell me that you’re still in love with me?” He says as he looks into your eyes. 

His eyes are easier to read now. It’s all crystal clear. It’s laid out perfectly in front of you.

“I’m still in love with you,” you whisper. 

“I’m in love with you,” he confesses. “Always have.”

His face brightens up. He never thought that he’d hear it from you. He feels like the luckiest man on Earth. Fate surely thinks the two of you are destined to be together, for it brought you both together at the perfect time and place the heart only knows. 

“So, when do you want to get married?”

“Slow your horses, Jaehyun.”

He lets out endearing laughter.

He’s surely going to marry you one day.

author’s note. this took so long to finish, i am so sorry for the long wait. i hope you guys enjoyed this! i think i’m going to take a few days off because writing this huge fic of a monster made me want to pull my hair out. again, i hope you guys enjoyed this!

send me feedback! comments? suggestions? let me know!