#it's my campaign I do what I want
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It's been a minute since I doodled something so here's a design update for an old oc. Why does this have the same background as my D&D NPC portraits you ask? oh, no reason...
#nadder#I already reused his name for Na'Dir#so now I'm reusing his snitties as another oc#it's my campaign I do what I want#dungeons & dragons
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the thing about "callout/cancel culture" that convinced me it's rotten to the core is the dehumanisation you face once you become the subject of a campaign like that. a lot of criticisms of callout/cancellation attempts appeal to the humanity of the subject, pointing out that it's unfair and unproductive to treat a person, a fellow human being, regardless of how much harm they've caused and how genuinely unlikable they are, like that. but unfortunately the reality of being the target of a mob mentality often means facing the very isolating and traumatising experience of realising that you've ceased to exist as a person in their eyes. you're a representation of your transgressions, an embodiment of harm that needs to be erased like a blemish, a spectacle for entertainment, a means of earning social approval by publicly condemning and humiliating you in what quickly becomes a competition to see who can strike the blow that knocks you down so you never get up again. nobody cares about who you are outside of what you did. people make mistakes and hurt one another, but there is always the capacity for change, for regret and reparations. you are an irredeemable monster. you can't change. the only way to make sure you can't cause harm ever again is to neutralise you entirely. to drive you off and hurt you so badly that you never consider coming back. and it often succeeds. but it doesn't make the world a better or safer place. it just tells everyone that certain behaviours will be punished, so you should conceal them, and harshly condemn them in others so that everyone knows where you stand; nobody will stand up for you if you're accused and brought out for judgement, so you shouldn't trust anyone, and always be on the lookout to take them down before they can do the same to you. you're not creating a safe, welcoming community. you're creating a panopticon built on fear and punishment.
#🐉#yes ive been the target of multiple harassment campaigns. yes i was in the wrong and deserved to be held accountable.#no i didnt deserve to be treated like that. and no i didnt change because people were cruel to me.#i changed because i was lucky enough to have friends who supported me and pointed out that they wanted me to be better because they cared#their disappointment and earnest belief in my capacity to be a better person was what made me realise i could and needed to do better
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The idea that uni protesters are "elitist ivy-league rich kids larping as revolutionaries" on Twitter and Reddit and even here is so fucking funny to me if you actually know anything about the student bodies at these unis. Take it from someone who's going to one of the biggest private unis in the US, 80% of the peers I know are either from the suburbs or an apartment somewhere in America, children of immigrants, or here on a student visa. I've heard about one-percenter students, but I've never met one in person. Like, don't get me wrong, the institution as a whole is still very privileged and white. I've talked with friends and classmates about feeling weird or dissonant being here and coming from such a different background. But in my art program, I see BIPOC, disabled, queer, lower-income students and faculty trying to deconstruct and tear that down and make space every day. So to take a cursory glance at a crowd of student protesters in coalitions that are led by BIPOC & 1st/2nd-gen immigrant students and HQ'd in ethnic housings and student organizations and say, "ah. children of the elite." Get real.
#also idk how to tell you this but even if it were true. wealthy children potentially sacrificing their educational careers to protest is#a good thing actually. idk how to tell you that caring about people from other nations is good#personal#“this war has nothing to do with most students cuz nobody's getting drafted” idk how to explain to you that we should be angry#that our tuitions of 10s of thousands of dollars that we pay every year for an education is being used to fund a genocidal campaign#also the implication that if you go to a uni institution you are automatically privileged by participation no matter your bg#i didn't /want/ to go to this school. i was supposed to go to a school with an art/animation program. but i realized my immigrant#parents have been working their whole lives to get me here. and turning the opportunity down would be a disservice to their sacrifice#this is getting into convos of “what 2nd gen kids owe their parents” which is different for everyone but. yeah#i just get pissed off at seeing people misrepresenting student bodies as “wealthy” and “privileged” and “elite” when it's such a blatant li#i remember a year ago a friend told me they can't fly home to hong kong for winter break because the plane tickets are too expensive#so they have to find temporary housing around the area#last quarter for a film doc class my film partner made a doc on a small group of marxist grad students from india discussing praxis#during a rally a few months ago in response to police presence the coalition invited palestinian students to speak about their experiences#and lead songs and read poems they wrote. these are STUDENTS. are they elitist too?#this is not to disregard my own personal privilege either.#this whole narrative's just to rationalize a lack of empathy to me. seeing a 19yo student get shot by a rubber bullet and your first#reaction is “HAW! HAW! bet richy rich didn't see THAT coming when she put on her terrorist hood!”#newsflash. these big uni campuses are HAUNTED by the violence of past protests and revolutions and police brutality. we know.#why do you think these coalitions have been making reinforced barricades at record speed
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wait guys actually! I have a great idea! Instead of feeling bad for reblogging our own art why don't we do a thing where we reblog older pieces/art that didn't get much attention/whatever you want and give commentary on it! Talk about what was fun to draw, what was hard, any interesting stories surrounding the making of it! Behind the scenes! pls guys that would be so fun to read I would LOVE to see that let's do it!
#like the commentary section in the extras on a dvd#*taking you by the shoulders very gently* i want to see the art. i want to see the art you're thinking about#the art you want to remind your followers about. i want to hear the secret lore about your art#i want to see you point out the details you added. i want to see process pictures#i want to see that enjoyed making the thing#i want your art to take up space on my dash. in the world. in my mind#whats the point of tidy art tucked in a corner where its convenient. how will people see it. how will it reached who it needs to#dont put a sheet over it. thats what they do when the house is abandoned and being sold! you're still living here!#your love of art. your joy will infect other people. its not annoying it's not too much#i guess this is my new campaign. my very own soap box#text#august rambles
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wizard vacation
#WE TRY AGAIN. if its crunchy again i give up. ✋its not my fate to worry about artifacts in my images#i dont know what crabs look like and you cant make me learn#yes. everything i draw about my dnd character is entirely based on whatever i do in any minecraft server just bc i made him my skin#i COULD theoretically draw. yk. actual canon or lore relevant or campaign moments. but i dont want to(stares into horizon stoicly#wtf... art#aescwynn#oc#dnd#dnd 5e#dnd art
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“It’s happening,” crows Dustin. “Eddie, it’s happening, it’s happening, she said yes!”
Eddie blinks up at him from the blankets. “Is…this about your little girlfriend, Henderson?” Is there a school dance coming up or something? Wait, it’s the summer, school’s not happening.
In a just world, Eddie Munson would never have to think about high school again; in a just world, Dustin Henderson would not have woken him up by breaking into his trailer at ass o’clock in the morning.
“No, man, Erica! Erica Sinclair! She’s gonna run a My Little Pony game for us!”
“Okay.” Eddie turns over to bury his face in his pillow. “Lock up when you leave,” he says, muffled.
———
He honest-to-god thinks it’s just a weird dream for the next few days. He’s almost completely forgotten about it when Mike corners him at work.
“You have to make her stop,” Mike says.
“Okay, Wheeler, two things. First: who am I making stop what? Second: I’m not making anyone stop anything. Really not my style, and also, I don’t wanna get involved in whatever this is.”
“You’re already involved! We’re all involved! We’re all, like, liable.”
“Right.” Eddie wipes his hands on a rag and ambles over. “Kid, you have got to start giving me some context here. What are we talking about?”
Mike gives him just the absolute bitchiest eyeroll any human being has ever mustered in the history of the world, and sighs noisily. “Erica wants to run a stupid game, and Dustin keeps encouraging her. Tell Erica and Dustin that we play Dungeons and Dragons with like, cool monsters and shit. Not some stupid game about ponies. It’s not even D&D, it’s a whole new stupid system that she’s making us learn.”
“Oh, shit.” There’s—a few things to unpack in that little speech, but Eddie can’t help the delighted grin spreading over his face. “That’s for real? The pony game? Shit, this is going to be the best thing ever. What system is she planning to run the campaign in?”
“Oh my god,” says Mike, and storms out of the garage.
———
“GURPS: Generic Universal Role-Playing System,” announces Erica, slamming the books down on Steve’s kitchen table. “A flexible, multi-purpose, setting-agnostic system that can accommodate any conceivable type of story or play style. This is the future of role-playing games, not your broke-ass fantasy bullcrap.”
Eddie wonders how complicated it is to file paperwork for adoption.
“Some of us like D&D,” says Will.
“Yeah, we don’t want your stupid generic whatever. We’re not playing,” Mike snaps.
“That’s not what I said.” Will looks annoyed with Mike, which has been happening a lot lately. Eddie’s glad the kid seems to be growing more of a spine; you can’t just let your tragic heterosexual crushes walk all over you, but that’s the kind of lesson every young gay needs to learn the hard way. “I’m fine with trying something new. I’m just saying, the next campaign after this should be D&D.”
“Sure, what-ever, nerds,” drawls Erica. “We’ll see how you feel after you experience the magic of Ponyland.”
Lucas puts his face in his hands when she says the magic of Ponyland and lets out a pitiful groan.
“Whoo!” cheers Dustin. “Let’s get started!”
———
It takes them a solid two hours to make their characters. Even Eddie, who’s been vaguely aware of GURPS since it was released a couple years ago, is struggling a little to adapt. It’s just been a while since he played anything but D&D, but he’s enjoying the change of pace. He likes this kind of challenge; it’s like figuring out how to play a familiar song in an unfamiliar genre.
Erica is not especially patient with them, but she’s clearly done her prep work, so Eddie thinks they all manage to get through the character creation process more or less the way it’s supposed to be done.
Steve gets back from work right when they’re putting the finishing touches on their characters. The way he blinks all sweetly confused makes Eddie think that Dustin was definitely lying about having permission to play here, and also that Dustin probably has a very troubling stash of keys to all their homes squirreled away somewhere.
“If I may, Lady Sinclair, I’d like to humbly suggest a ten-minute break?” Eddie says, before Steve can decide whether or not to be mad about this whole thing.
“Sure, go ahead and rest up while you still can,” says Erica. “Steve, I hope you got good snacks around here.” She makes a beeline for the kitchen, and the boys trip over themselves to follow her.
“I would die for that child,” says Eddie.
Steve laughs, low and a little tired. “Yeah. Um, me too.”
“So, I’m gonna go ahead and guess that Henderson didn’t actually clear this with you?”
“Honestly, I’m not sure.” Steve runs a hand through his hair. “He might’ve said something last week? Sometimes when he’s on a tear, I just kinda let him talk.”
“Y’know, we’re at a pretty good stopping point for today, if you want us to clear out so you can get some rest.” Eddie can see the smudgy shadows under Steve’s eyes from halfway across the room.
“No, it’s fine.” Steve peels off his vest. He’s wearing an entire perfectly normal shirt underneath, so there’s no reason for Eddie to hastily avert his eyes like Steve’s doing a damn striptease. “I might go take a nap, though. Gonna trust you not to let them burn down the place, got it?”
Eddie does a silly little salute. “Aye aye, cap’n. No hint of flame shall breach these walls.”
Steve laughs again, a gravelly chuckle, and musses Eddie’s hair on his way to the stairs.
“Why do you have that dumb look on your face,” says Erica suspiciously, standing in the kitchen doorway and clutching the biggest bowl of ice cream Eddie’s seen in his life.
“What look, there’s no look,” says Eddie. “Let’s play some GURPS.”
Edit: now a complete fic on AO3!
#steddie#(barely)#yep it's a new one folks!!#I do not promise that this will have any continuation whatsoever#I've just loved the idea of Erica running a MLP GURPS campaign for ages#and thought it'd be fun to write something up since a lot of my current WIPs don't really involve the kids at all#and also I wanted to write something with waaaay lower stakes than the hanahaki AU#sometimes I am like 'maybe I should space these out to have a consistent flow of content and a buffer' but uhhhh no. that's not happening.#fic: what will today's adventure be
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who runs a one-shot at first level? it’s a one-shot. let me do more than one thing before needing to take a nap. and don’t send options for cool subclasses in the setting you’re choosing if some people won’t even have access to that because they’d get it at level 3!
#first level is like. fine for a campaign. but if i’m doing a one shot i want more than three abilities#this is just annoying bc like. i haven’t played in forever i don’t full time play with this group anymore and this is what i get for options#obviously i don’t mean who in general i’m wondering for the purposes of my fm who knows her players can play#and if you want simplicity two and three are. right there. you can do like two more things at level 2 than 1#and you feel less like you’re gonna eat shit if you get breathed on wrong#i just need to rant about this sorry#alli plays dnd
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Here is a rushed Hunter long legs design
This is likely not the last time they will appear here
#my art#rain world#rain world spoilers#hunter long legs#rain world hunter#this is really not what I should be doing right now#but rain world is on my mind#so it can't be helped#I love hunter#didn't finish their campaign yet#because I have a skill issue#of course#but I want to#once I have more time#body horror
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Human Wizard, Lacuna.
ever make a standby DnD character and immediately go feral over them
#dungeons and dragons#dnd#dnd oc#in a dnd lull so to keep myself sane i am coming up with some character concepts to keep in the tank#gotta have a neurotic wizard with a thousand yard stare#and enough ambition to cause serious damage#i have a couple other pc ideas but they require drawing armor and i love myself too much to do that to me right now#must resist making them all human#i am a basic bitch#style consistency who#saving this dude for a horror campaign#even though all my characters seem to be able to fit well in horror campaigns... look i love horror#the kiss is a tattoo#sometimes you just gotta ask yourself “what kind of dnd character would I want played by 70s Al Pacino?” then make an overwhelmed wizard#with a new york accent#original character#biji draws#oc#manifesting a game and the time to play in it
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[ID: a digital drawing of Riz Gukgak from D20 fantasy high from the waist up. He looks like he's holding onto sanity by a thread and is covered in blood as he attempts to sew a finger back onto Biz's hand and says, ha ha, oopsie! End ID]
Damn man being 14 sure is tough... It's all just pimples this, brutally shooting off a classmate's fingers before figuring out he wasn't the mastermind and then immediately regretting it that...
#dimension 20#d20 fantasy high#fantasy high spoilers#fantasy high freshman year#riz gukgak#watched the whole first season in a blur and have many emotions about them#my homicidal princesses etc etc#never watched a campaign before so i just went from la di da in episode 1 to rocking on the floor w adaine in ep 2#i half regret not writing down the moments i wanted to draw but also i am going to watch the hell out of moments compilations on yt#so im sure ill remember at least some#too many good moments to count#have to do the 'yes!' thing. i just have to#fantasy high freshman year spoilers#ill skip the live one shots for now and go straight to sophomore and then come back later#also hi. just in general. what the fuck what the absolute fuck#i see why this was meant to be watched on a weekly level#blood tw
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Sometimes I try to write down thoughts about this campaign but I admittedly have not been paying enough attention to feel confident in my character analysis so I write an incoherent text post and then delete it because I don't know if I'm actually making the correct judgments.
#cr spoilers#in the tags#so i'm going to rant in here instead if you keep reading past this you can't get mad at me#anyway i want to talk about ashton#and how they would have been absolutely intolerable in c1 or c2#where every character was invested in saving the world#for one reason or another#and c3 is just like#orym is the only one talking sense and everyone else is just like 'well maybe?'#but matt also said something about being ready for exandria to shift drastically based on their chocie#and if matt weren't ready for exandria to change ashton would be harder to watch than they are now#idk taliesin does quite often play around with hypocrisy with his characters so i'm not really surprised#by ashton claiming to stand up for the little person and then going and being willing to blow up their entire world#like they're not actually thinking about the 'little person'#they're thinking about themselves and that's really it#but yeah i do keep waiting for someone to say something that gives ashton that realization#that they can't use their trauma as an excuse to blow up everyone else's lives#idk i'm running out of steam#it's interesting to watch taliesin play around with this#but i've got to say that if they don't make a fucking choice about what they're actually going to do#idk i'm just ready for them ALL to stop waffling#okay now i'm done#i still have a lot of thoughts but i'd have to rewatch the whole campaign to feel confident in my talking points#and that's not going to happen lol
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I don't often post my non kink related art but I'm tryna get the attention of someone else in the community and am too shy and cringe to reach out so. Here, have this portrait I did of Hanzo Shimada. With my finger. On ibis paint. This took me four hours. Progress for proof below.
#we have so many similar interests and im trying to not be cringe about that 🧍♂️#hi im autistic and some people are really really hard to reach out to lol#anyways ove/watch fandom please don't look at my fat kink blog i cannot handle normie anon hate rn#plus id. what u think bc u play OVE/WATCH#idc* oops#not retyping all that#and if you have seen this art on animo and noticed i updated my signature no u didnt!!!#i dont want people on amino knowing im a fat guy that thinks it hot to get fatter#let me be kinky in peace#hanzo#hanzo art#hanzo shimada#hanzo fanart#overwatch fanart#watch either get no notes at all like all my other art or spark the first fatphobic harassment campaign against me bc i dared#to post out my uaual tags#anyways#artists on tumblr#trans artist#overwatch#my art ALWAYS gets ignored its such a SHITTY FUCKING FEELING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats WHY I NEVER POST IT !!!!!!!!!!!!#but whatever im not normal and need to make friends somehow#when people learn to give the attention my art is worth ill post more#but yall on this site NEVER. do ( at least on ever blog I had before this one)#i just dobt post much of it here bc whats the point? no one gives a shit about my intrests and skillls#im just. pretty face to look at#and thats all ill ever be or amount to#bi polar ramblings ig ig ig
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My first ever DND session is tomorrow OOUGHHH I'm nervous but excited!!
I'm playing as a "human" ranger (put in quotes bc my character isn't actually human but is just masquerading as one), if you guys have any tips on what to do in a first session please let me know I'm going into this pretty much blind lol
It'll be a relatively short session (like 3 hours tops) and I honestly do not know what to expect so. Any advice is appreciated 🙏
#My DM/roommate already did my character sheet#I'll have to ask him about that tonight actually. Bc I want to see it.#But like. Do I need to know or have anything else...#I HAVE DICE. AT THE VERY LEAST I HAVE THAT READY. LOL#I probably should be doing more prep but I really don't know what to prep FOR. You know??#I did start watching a campaign to get a general feel of how it's going to go#Also my character is very stoic and quiet. And doesn't really have a lot of common sense. LOL#She's trying to learn to be human but she gets things wrong a lot so people think she's strange#I've thought a lot about her backstory but I don't want to get TOO into it in case this is a one time thing#(It probably won't be but who knows.)#Shima speaks#DND
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Let's go, fighting from the heart / I'll tear the world apart / No, I can't stand to see you be with anyone but me
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Shaking my GM (/pos) for using this as nightmare fodder for tiarnán in last night's session
#q#my art#dnd#dnd art#dnd character#dnd oc#dungeons and dragons#pathfinder#wizard#campaign: hadreon#ocs: tiarnan#ocs: moirin#yeah I put the lyrics to love is war in this post what do you want from me#thank the friend I comm'd to draw moirin and suggested the song for their playlist <3#oh also#every time something mildly terrible happens to tiarnan#i am haunted by the interaction i had with my gm like a month or so ago now#me: “wow huh everyone seems to be going through it. im glad tiarnan's doing okay though.”#gm: “oh just you wait what i have in store for you *gilf*”#like 3 sessions later -> moirin attacks
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why are ppl always so mean about taz :(
#every time theres a new arc everyone who only liked balance is like 'oh if u dropped off after balance u have to listen to THIS arc bc its#JUST LIKE BALANCE'#every damn time.#it happened with ethersea a bit but especially w steeplechase and vs dracula#and u get ppl in the notes of these posts saying 'oh yeah i fucking hated everything after balance sooo glad theyre finally doing exactly#what i want them to!!'#like. its ok to have personal preference but dont be mean about it :(#and comparing every campaign to balance is rlly annoying sry#let them be their own thing#stop being so blinded by nostalgia ig#like not to be rude but. i think ppl think balance is the most Perfect Thing Ever but its rlly...not#all the campaigns have flaws but i aint canceling them for that#like what happened with grad#idk its like if balance came later ppl would probably be much more mean about it#bc they wouldnt be blinded by nostalgia as much or smthn#anyways#at the end of the day the mcelroys shouldnt be expected to make a replica of balance every campaign#and thats not what theyre trying to do. theyre doing what THEY personally want to do. like they clearly dont care abt what others think lol#theyre experimenting and having fun#its like. a free podcast with a bunch of silly dudes playing for funsies. they shouldnt have such high expectations or be demonized#in any way#my point being. if i see anyone being mean abt taz u get blocked#>:(#coon speaks#not tagging taz. i dont wanna see nasty ppl in my notifs ty
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The past couple days online have been... interesting. I consider myself a leftist, think capitalism is corrupt, and think that it needs to be seriously reformed/overthrown. I admit that while I've thrown around phrases and terms like "burn it all down" and "the revolution needs to come" out of frustration without actually thinking about what a revolution entails: excellent organization, unity, and strategy to defeat the United States, the world's largest military superpower which has inflicted political and social destabilization across the majority of countries around the world. There also needs to be superb infrastructure and community to support the disabled, elderly, and poor populations who rely on government assistance and programs, healthcare, and accommodations while this so-called revolution rages on.
All I've received from the far leftist movement are lectures from condescending intellectuals who rattle off academic citations regarding ideological theory rather than practical, tangible steps to advocate for change in our local and regional communities. I have not seen one of them actually discuss conversations they've had with their friends, family, or Americans about what they want to see reflected for the future of the country. I have not seen one of them discussed how destructive, detrimental and traumatic a Trump presidency was for social prejudice and morale in the United States. I understand that for many marginalized groups they've been living in a facist state for centuries so the possibility Project 2025 doesn't galvanize them to see the two parties differently, but I don't think it is fair to white leftists falsely equivocate the election of both parties for the entire American population at all??? Or like at least specify the issues you're referring to in which you view both parties as the same????? Literally one TikTok creator who I used to follow talked about how true leftists are so much better than liberals because they aren't waiting for a presidential candidate to save the world NOW due to the accelerated apocalypse due to climate change but when asked how to change the world they suggest sharing ideas of your future utopia with other leftist groups. How the fuck is sitting around talking about living in a walkable community is great considered "saving the world now"? How are you going to dismantle and restructure American infrastructure to create these communities? How are you going to remove existing racial and social tensions to create a community where everyone lives happily side by side? Do people not consider reality at all?????
And is it not wrong for people to have a fucking sliver of optimism and hope at incremental change that's achieved within the corrupt bipartisan system of American politics, even if they know it's propaganda??? Is it wrong for people to have a singular fucking moment of relief in feeling like their values, beliefs, and lives will be better protected and THEY can advocate for change better??? Is it wrong when there's a couple months until the most pressing election in recent history for people to make the choice they feel will reduce the most amount of harm???
#literally i've seen some leftists post like the people in the us could never handle the torture that the us inflicts in other countries#like seriously what the actual fuck do you not think most people are struggling here and dying of preventable diseases and being subjected#to hate crimes mental health crisis systemic racism sexism etc.#why the fuck arent you actually helping your community and helping them see how foreign and domestic policy are tied instead of screaming#like so much of this virtue signaling and not being grounded in reality drives me crazy#and im fucking tired of not being allowed to feel happiness about anything unless it's morally socially perfect how the fuck are we suppose#to move the needle if we never fucking feel happy????? like what after your disorganized revolution the way your room is disorganized i can#be happy that i live in a perfect utopia?? NO! that's not how the fucking world works get a grip#i never believed in working within the system but at least other more reasonable leftists have offered tangible solutions to sway politicia#in our favor and retain a little bit of our rights#like this one woman was saying union organizers align themselves with democrats strategically not because they agree with the party but#so that democrats will count on their vote and money and in turn advocate for union rights#like i feel like a far leftist would be like omg how dare you align with the democrats!!! but like honey!!! what the fuck are we supposed t#do??? stick our fucking nose up at the current political system unless we get everything we want to move the party further to the right and#then wake up one day and realize because we were waiting for a perfect system all our fucking rights are gone?????#bffr#i know i am going to lose all of my followers for this post#grace rants#politics#donald trump#kamala harris#joe biden#jd vance#project 2025#2024 elections#also to be clear this is what i feel right now because of the delayed discussion of far-leftism and options and campaigning for candidates#if leftists actually get together and UNIFY and fucking do something i'll consider inching forward to the revolution#but screaming the system is corrupt without giving people solutions or action steps and just giving them severe anxiety is unhelpful
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