#it's literally not working because Everyone Is Ignoring Me :)))
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Once again, ignore that this took several months, but here's some angst. I'm still not entirely happy with it... but here you go <3
“You want something to drink?” he asks once they’ve made their way into the loft. He quite honestly wants to just get into bed and fall asleep, or maybe have a shower first. He probably stinks. Should he put some deodorant on?
Across from him, Tommy raises an eyebrow. “Should you be drinking?” he asks. And there’s nothing really wrong with what he says, but Buck doesn’t really like the way he sounds like he knows better.
“So what? My blood will be extra thin, I’ll be even less susceptible to clots,” he tries to joke, but it falls flat.
“You know that’s not the way it works.”
“Fine.” Buck huffs, closing the fridge. “But there’s nothing stopping you from having a drink.” He’s just being a good host, what’s wrong with that?
“You know I’m not going to do that.” Tommy looks at him concerned. His eyebrows are furrowed, and he’s looking at him with big, sad eyes, and he suddenly hates it.
“I— I don’t like the way you’re looking at me like I’m gonna break. Like I’m broken. I’m fine. I’m in good health. I’m strong enough to be a firefighter— I passed.” He hates how he always feels like he has to defend himself. Hates how, as soon as he feels threatened, his body decides to betray him and brings his emotions right to the surface for everyone to see.
Tommy doesn’t even react to his short outburst. “Bobby told me that you decided to quit.”
And that— Tommy didn’t speak to him, but he spoke to his captain? Sure, Tommy felt guilty; they discussed that literally five minutes ago, but how does Bobby factor into this? “What? You’re talking to my captain now? Behind my back?”
“I was just thanking him for having us over, I wasn't trying to intrude—”
“I’m a firefighter, that’s who I am. If they won’t let me, then I’m not going to stick around. I can’t.” He can’t. He’s struggled enough in the last few months as it is. He’s not sure he can handle being on the sidelines, watching his family do the job he’s supposed to be doing, whilst what? Filling out forms? Buck’s never been much of a writer.
“Light duty wouldn’t be the end of your life, Evan.”
“Being a firefighter is my life.” His family are all firefighters. His sister is a 911 dispatcher who’s dating a firefighter. His entire world revolves around firefighting.
Before being a firefighter, Buck spent five years trying every other job there is. And they didn’t stick, because there’s only one thing for him. Buck wouldn’t be Buck if it weren’t for firefighting.
“It’s the only thing I’ve done that matters. Without it… I’m nothing.” He’s not saying it for pity, it’s just the truth.
Tommy lets out a breath. “Nobody cares if you’re a firefighter.”
“I care!” Buck hates the way his voice breaks, hates how his vision blurs with tears that he can’t hold back. “I thought— I thought you’d understand. You said flying was… I thought you’d understand.”
Tommy was the one who said that flying was everything to him. Breathing fresh air. So why can’t he understand that firefighting is just as important to him?
“That’s not what I—”
“No. I don’t— I can’t— I think you should leave.”
“Evan…”
“Please.” It’s barely a whisper.
Tommy closes the door on this way out.
#purple writes#purple asks#bucktommy#911 abc#evan buck buckley#911 fandom#tommy kinard#bucktommy physio fic#911 wip
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I think what bothers me the most about people doing this is that I always see them say something about how Saw "unnecessarily blew up the base" that it was "entirely useless" and he was just "stubborn" and "couldn't see the bigger picture"
And like 1, WE have the dramatic irony of knowing that Tarkin and Krennic are going to survive bc we saw the other movies, Saw did not. 2, It wouldn't have been "useless" and "unnecessary" if his plan had succeeded, and he obviously didn't know it wouldn't succeed.
Rewatched the scenes recently (bc I got in a fight about this on pinterest of all places lolll), and there's a very important detail people always ignore:
The Batch being there messed up Saw's plan too. They both didn't know the other would have a mission there at the same time and both missions suffered for it. The Batch maybe could have gotten away with the disturbance in the hangar, and Saw's team could have gotten away with hacking the cameras, but both together drew too much attention and the Imperials discovered them. (which, side note: makes me think back to episode 1, when Hunter tells Saw you can't defeat the Empire and Saw says "not alone we can't." like maybe if they had been working together with the rebel groups they could have better coordinated their efforts)
Saw had no reason to give up his mission, that he surely planned and worked for for weeks, with just half a minute of talking with some guys he ran into. Why should he give up his mission that was equally important to his cause anymore than they should give up theirs? Also why is this fandom acting like trying to kill Tarkin is a bad thing??? Hello??
Saw: Taking out several of their top commanders is a good start. Tech: Well, that victory will be short-lived as their ranks will quickly be replenished.
I just really don't think this is true. Tarkin is a big player, like 3rd in command after the Emperor and Vader, I don't think that taking him out of the picture would be useless. Think of how much work and sacrifice went into assassinating Reinhard Heydrich during WW2. Or how taking out Dooku and Grievous was a major factor in ending the Clone War. Rogue One also shows that Krennic is the main reason the Death Star even happened, bc he championed the project and brought Galen Erso back to the Empire. And if Hemlock had died then? Yeah the clones would need to find another way to find Tantiss base (which they end up doing later), but Omega never would have been captured (something else people like to blame on Saw). And if Hemlock dying at the end of s3 is what leads to Tantiss and Project Necromancer being abandoned and Omega finally being safe, I think it's safe to say that the ranks wouldn't just be replenished without any significant impact.
Taking out major leaders is a valid strategy, especially if a bunch of them are in one place. Like literally if Saw's plan had succeeded maybe the war could have been cut in half with one attack. That is the definition of the bigger picture! Yet bc Tech the oh so smart guy said one thing about it being short-sighted (in typical bad batch 'fighting the Empire is futile' fashion) everyone agrees that it was for nothing. Like honestly with all this in mind the Batch are really the ones who should have given up their mission for Saw's. And saying it was useless just because his plan didn't work out is like saying something like Operation Valkyrie was useless because it failed.
And again, it didn't work out because the Batch being there interfered. So basically, if yall are gonna blame Saw for Tech's death, then by that same logic you should blame the Batch for the Death Star and Alderaan.
Also, I think it's kinda messed up that they gave Saw this line "sacrifices have to be made for the greater good" as if it is radical, dismissive, and selfish (or at least that is how I always see people twist it), a year after Andor s1 came out which showed a Saw who clearly understands and feels the weight of those sacrifices.
For those who didn't know fans have been blaming Saw, it's been happening since that episode aired but Generation Tech did so in a recent video and you'll see plenty of this annoying sentiment in the comments. Literally saying "Saw KILLED Tech" and never mentioning Tarkin who had the car shot off the track. (They do it so violently too, I've seen stuff like "get your pitchforks" and "he must be drawn and quartered" and even "I bought an action figure of him just to torture him" like babe get a life and it's not his freaking fault!!)
I think what pushed me over the edge is seeing some people say "if only the Batch had followed orders and killed Saw in the first episode then Tech would still be alive"
like
I hope they were just joking bc um WTF??
"If only they had FOLLOWED ORDERS"???? You mean Tarkin's orders to literally kill civilians and CHILDREN?!? The orders that pushed them to leave the Empire, arguably the only moral decision the Batch (minus Echo and Omega) ever made in regards to the Empire?? Those orders!?
I'm so uncomfortable with fans blaming Saw for Tech's death, when arguably there were so many other factors. Saw isn't wrong for deciding to stage an attack when all of Imperial High Command was in one place.
I think it's unfortunate that Tech died, but with the way Bad Batch fans talk about Saw you'd think he was being malicious towards Tech in the first place. Mind you, he warned them, and didn't immediately blow the place up.
There's more smoke for Saw than there is for Tarkin or even Hemlock, in that scene. Wasn't Tarkin the one who sent reinforcements that contributed to Tech having to sacrafice himself? Even if Saw didn't blow the place up, they would have been cutting it incredibly close.
I think another layer is they wouldn't even be there if it weren't for Crosshair working with the Empire to begin with.
Idk why but whenever there are ample examples of other people besides Saw who contributed to Tech's death (namely, you know, the Empire), the blame is unfairly placed on Saw.
And if you want to say what Saw does doesn't do anything on the Grand Scheme of things, then fair. But same with Rex and his clone revolution. Regardless though, they are still acts that manage to negatively impact the Empire, no matter how small.
It's not Saw's fault Tech died. It's Tarkin's. It's the Empire's.
#yeah thats when i lost sympathy for the tech girlies#that's toxic af#I could be the first person to complain about Saw saying he doesn't want to give up his mission for “just a few clone prisoners”#and I'm not#bc it makes sense#he's right#and you could never claim that the Batch (minus Echo) have the moral high ground there#bc they literally only care about tantiss bc crosshair was captured#and then give that up immediately after tech dies#and THEN only care bc omega is captured#TWICE#tbb salt#tbb critical#tho honestly don't think the writers intended it to be taken this way bc it is such a logical leap to blame saw#fandumb#fandom discourse#star wars meta#saw gerrera#tbb#andor#mini rant
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Varian headcannons
He/they baddie
Has lots of burn scars from experiments
Has scars on his wrists from handcuffs. For this reason he never takes off his gloves unless he's alone or with someone he trusts.
Trust issues. This kid was ignored by pretty much everyone when he needed them most, it's gotta have an effect on his ability to have healthy relationships (they say, almost like they're not speaking from experience)
Angry and Catalina were the first friends he had that were vaguely around his age. The vat7k gang (- yong) were the first friends he had actually within a year of his age (I hc angry as 12 and catalina as 14 in season 3. the vat7k gangs ages are again my personal hcs: Nuru as 17, Hugo as 19 and Yong as 15).
Used to love the snow and rain and winter because it meant hot cocoa and time with his dad. The blizzard ruined a lot of things for him, including the snow.
Sensory issues galore (no I'm not projecting wdym)
Sh scars BC boy hates himself for everything he's done and blames himself for everything that went wrong
Whipping scars from prison. Again based off a HC of mine where they put him in maximum security and treated him like a regular major prisoner (including fun perks like interrogation, torture, starvation and whipping) until his old cellmate attacked him pretty badly so they threw him into the cell with Andrew. (Which was no better. Seriously which fricking ass had the oh so intelligent brainwave to put him in with Andrew. That's why I created this HC to at least try to give it a rational explanation)
Frostbite scars. You're telling me that a kid in a winter coat travelling the carriage worthy distance from old Corona to the castle through a blizzard literally described as a divine death trap TWICE made it out unscathed? No way!
Looks perpetually like a 12 yer old, much to his annoyance and to the amusement of Eugene.
Autism and ADHD. Look at him. Just look. Especially at the beginning of that episode where he gets kidnapped.
Also: PTSD, anxiety, depression, and BPD. Yes I'm projecting but also. Varians anxiety is pretty much canon ATP. You can see it in most of his episodes pre and post villain arc. PTSD because even in be very afraid, which happens around 2 years after his dad was trapped in amber, he is still very affected by it. Depression and low self esteem, he's miserable about everything that's happened and that's kind of ruined his life and he hates himself for it. Little canon evidence but feels right. BPD- much of Varians character, especially early on, is built around seeking affirmation. When he is repeatedly denied it, his emotions overcome him and he can't hold it anymore and breaks down. Also I see him as very emotional and logical at the same time so he has mood swings out of his control and is horrified at himself because he knows they aren't rational but he can't control them. Totally not projecting. Again not much canon evidence but great for angst and projecting purposes.
Since I'm projecting here I might as well project my artstyle on him. Sketchy, done with a pen or pencil and one random colour on the back of pretty much anything. Actually pays attention to lighting and tone on the rare occasion it is required. Very good at making random scribbles look like a perfect replica of something he's seen before. Good for scientific drawing and sketches. Terrible for fully finished works. Unlike me he is very good at art and makes my weird artstyle look good.
POTS. No real reason, just I can make characters physically disabled in headcannons and I want to use that power. Also varigo fluff potential.
Reads too much
Chronic loneliness from having no one to talk to (I'm projecting too fcking much and I know it)
Insomniac and won't admit it. Has passed out plentiful times in his lab and the most random places ever from pure exhaustion. This got worse during the villain arc because Quirin wasn't there to drag his sleepy ass to bed. Hugo worries.a (no it isn't an ungodly hour in the morning when I'm typing this wdym).
Reconnects with Cass post canon.
Has nightmares about his dad, sots, prison or Andrew regularly and needs either his dad, Eugene and later Hugo to stay with him after.
Has a serious sense of ✨style✨
Biromantic and asexual. He does not escape my giant aspec ray.
Begged his dad for weeks to let him keep ruddiger, who wandered into his lab one day and soon enough became his "assistant". Quirin was rather displeased (DW he came around eventually guys).
We all know that Varian loves animals, but did you know that animals love Varian?
Very picky eater who has a bunch of allergies and often forgets to eat (y am I projecting sm here chat).
Very good at lying and manipulating and scheming, as seen in his villain arc, but his emotions and guilt and empathy get in the way most of the time. As he should tell Hugo in my hcs, "just because I can doesn't mean I enjoy doing it". (HC: Hugo knows Varian has some sort of criminal past but he doesn't know that he was his gay awakening, the alchemist).
Makes annoying household inventions.
sassy and overdramatic
Issues with authority
Shares some rather radical opinions with Hugo and Cass
Frustrated at Cass walking away scott free whilst he was stuck in prison for a year
Bottles up anger until it explodes at the worst possible moment
is NOT innocent.
Intense fear of disappointing people, especially those who wouldn't have a negative reaction, since "that just makes it worse".
Idealist that kept getting more and more frustrated and disillusioned over time.
There are more but this post is long enough as it is. Almost all of these are me projecting on Varian.
What are some of your Varian headcannons? I'd love to know. :)
#varian#varian the alchemist#varian headcannons#headcannons#character headcanons#tts varian#varian vat7k#varian tts#tangled varian#varian and the seven kingdoms#tts#rapunzels tangled adventure#tangled the series#rapunzel's tangled adventure#rapunzles tangled adventure#varian rta#rta varian#rta#varian and the 7 kingdoms#varian and hugo#varian angst#varigo#vat7k
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seveneveral sentencesparagraphs sunday
tagged by @irregularcollapse !! :') i am so excited for more tenny and cyberpunk
here's some wild west au even though i literally just said it's on pause until the fall time after i actually go work with horses (not for fic research i'm not that crazy), just bc i already sent a bit of it to @swifty-fox today. long chunk since you'll all forget it by the time it actually sees the light of day <3
“That man’s somethin’ else.”
Gale had been sitting on the chopping block, some ways off from the round pen, watching even though he shouldn't have been, when Alexander meandered over. Glancing up, Gale found him watching John too, a look that couldn't be mistaken for anything but respect and admiration. Gotdamn, Gale thought, even Alexander.
“Yeah,” Gale agreed reluctantly.
“You don't like him.”
“I never said that.”
“You don't got to say it. I can see it.”
Gale shook his head. When they'd first met, Gale had felt that familiar kind of sickness for Alexander. A nagging kind of flutter in Gale’s blood. But he’d learned to ignore it until it went away, just like all the other times. A hope he still held out for with John, only two weeks into knowing the bastard.
“So what's so wrong with ‘im? All I see is a cowboy to the manner born,” Alexander said, teasing almost like Gale was a fool for not tumbling ass over front for the man like everyone else did.
That, Gale had to think about. Not because there weren't a hundred reasons off the top of his head what's so wrong with John, but because having to say them out loud made him feel suddenly like a dunderhead. A kid who was mad just to be mad. All told, Gale should like John. He worked hard, he was nice enough to his men, and by god if he didn’t know how to work a horse.
It must have been an hour that John had been in the pen with that Appaloosa. Gale had given it to him on a whim, maybe something childish in him wanting to give John a difficult animal in hopes he’d fail. It was selfish. Wouldn’t help John or the horse if he couldn’t make progress enough to get the horse range ready. But he’d been making fast work anyhow. Right now, they were doing some kind of little dance Gale had seen John do. The Appaloosa was bridled already, put up with it enough, and John was mostly just standing there staring at him. He’d wait for the horse to move, swing his neck over or take a step, and John would walk him in a tight circle, or push him back, tucking his neck down with the bridle, and they’d start all over again. It was strange, and gentle, and John hadn’t used anything but his hands and rope the whole time.
“I don’t like the way he talks to me,” Gale offered, finally.
John murmured something to the horse, smiled like he’d understand.
“What, cause he calls you Buck?”
Was John calling him Buck even when he wasn’t around? Were his men starting to think of him as Buck, too? Calling him the name Bucky gave him? Gale caught the grimace on his face and put it away. John let the horse inch his neck closer, closer, ears sliding back, and then a threshold, some line was crossed, and John walked him in another circle.
“Part of it. No man should be calling his boss lil nicknames like that.”
Alexander laughed. “Boss? Since when you call yourself boss around here?”
Heat bloomed across Gale’s neck. He hadn’t thought of himself as the boss until John was involved. Even now, he didn’t feel like anyone’s boss but John’s. And John didn’t even care.
“It’s different with him. I already know you boys. He shows up, some guy I didn’t even pick, and acts like he doesn’t answer to anyone.”
More laughing, this time a little softer, like Alexander was pitying Gale or something. “Is that why you’re mad? Old man Cleven chose some out of town cowboy without asking you first and you’re upset about it? Bucky listens just fine, and you know it.”
But he didn’t listen just fine. He was still calling Gale Buck, still acting friendly with him when Gale kept giving him every reason not to. He watched John take a step toward the horse, and the horse take a step back, and John rub at his neck in reward. The heat crept up to Gale’s ears and cheeks, prompting him to stand.
not tagging anyone bc 1) i'm shy and 2) i feel like everyone has been tagged alreadyyyyyy ? ? ? ? ? ??
#and yes the entire fic draws parallels between gale and a stubborn horse obviously#and just like a horse he gets bridled at some point iykwim#and ALEXANDER IS HEEERE!!!!!!#clegan#buck x bucky#wild west au
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What no one tells you about studying Astrology…
It can get overwhelming QUICKLY. You have to pace yourself and bring it right down to basics, I have still have reference sheets from 2018 that I still use to this day. When it becomes overwhelming it can feel frustrating as to understand one aspect of astrology, you need to learn another etc.
2) People goofing or mocking you, it could be people you know, or if you have just met them - they will happily share their opinions about how Astrology is spurious, a pseudoscience, or that it takes advantage of people when they are most vulnerable. It used to really, really, REALLY irritate and enrage me because they hadn’t studied it, and were not open-minded enough. I have to say, it can hurt when someone who doesn’t even know the definition of Astrology, tells you that it is meaningless. But overtime, I simply say: “There are a lot of myths around Astrology, I just use it as a therapeutic tool, and focus on free-will and the healing capabilities it can have - if you choose to use it that way.” - Then, I move on. I now focus on people who are curious about it. People are on their own path, and as an astrologer, you don’t need to prove to people anything - but it is easier said than done when someone says something so ignorant.
3) ‘The Astrologer’s Curse’ is a theory that once you learn Astrology, it can be inescapable. In the sense that you assume everything a human says or does can be related back to their natal chart or transits. If you are not aware of this, it can be very limiting in a way that you are putting your full trust in an ‘ambiguous force’ that is the Universe, and not being open-minded to other reasonings, or using your free-will. Also, it can be restrictive as you begin to live your life according to what astrology says in the literal sense - For example, not going on that short trip to Paris because Mercury is in Retrograde, or not dating someone because they’re a Gemini Moon in the 11th House.
4) Learning to be discerning over charlatans that use Astrology to scaremonger people. There are charlatans in every field, but once you understand that astrology is not supposed to scare or shame people, or even, in my opinion, tell them what to do or how to live their life, you begin to realise there are SO many misconceptions some ‘astrologers’ spew out on the internet or horoscope columns.
5) Understanding that every astrologer approaches their work with different perspectives on how to interpret a chart - this is something that has taken me years to actually understand, and that not to become confused when information I hear from one astrologer, contradicts another piece of information I have heard. This is why when you are looking for an astrologer to read your chart, you must research their background, their experience, what perspectives they’re writing from. Even their qualifications - do they a diploma in Astrology? (I don’t have one yet give me time hehe). Everyone has a subconscious bias, and you could easily be reading something that has one or multiple underlying themes, ESPECIALLY if you’re new to Astrology.
6) My final point is the broad field of study astrology can offer you. I have really just focused on Psychological, Natal Chart, Synastry/Composite, and Locational Astrology - there are so many other fields to study, such as Mundane, Financial, Horary, Electional, Vedic, Medical and Karmic Astrology. It can feel quite intimidating so I just take it one step at a time. I try to view my feelings of intimidation as a chance to see that the gift of astrology can offer us so many alternate perspectives and ideas on how the celestial bodies affect our moods, behaviours, plans, and everything else under the sun!
I’m curious to know what your thoughts are about studying Astrology. How do you manage these? Let’s start a discussion because I feel this is something that is not spoken about enough!
#thoughts#astrology#feelings#thoughts about astrology#studying astrology#learning astrology#zodiac#psychological astrology#mundane astrology#locational astrology#medical astrology#vedic astrology#karmic astrologt#financial astrology#horary astrology#predictive astrology#natal chart astrology#natal chart reading#synastry#composite#compatibility
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its now 11/12 in my game and im gambling like crazy in the palace and im here with goro akechi kills people theory: round 2
- so in his and joker's duel, the gun he uses definitely isn't the same one he uses normally. it appears more similar to the gun the man behind the slaughter used to shoot okumura (with his left hand and everything yk yk its all connected)
- as early on as the arcade he was joking about "taking joker out" (🤨🏳️🌈) which is exactly whats going on now with the duel and glove and all that. i think that means he's been planning to kill me (joker) for a long time, which makes sense with him lying about when he first went to the metaverse.
- so the biggest problem with this theory is that obviously the guy's mask isnt black like madarame said back in the day. i dont have a very good explanation aside from "ignore that part and it works", but i will mention it so everyone knows i didnt forget that. im also aware that when shooting okumura and in akechi's flashback the killer seems to have a vastly different outfit from akechi. my only defenses are again "go away dont ruin my theory" and also the phantom thieves can change outfits in the metaverse all the time.
- i just thought of something so MAYBE perhaps its based on cognition like our super cool outfits are in the first place. maybe he appears with a different outfit between okumura and sae's palace because, while both seeing him as a threat, okumura knows hes the killer and sees him as such while sae doesnt?? idk this part is literally all speculation i have zero proof
- ok this theory has been building up for a WHILE but i think shido's using him for political gain and ill elaborate on that. first off, i think his goal is to set the phantom thieves up as a huge threat and then very publicly defeat them to give the impression hes saving the people and get voters, effectively putting public trust in him and taking away any suspicion from the murders i think he was doing to anyone he saw as a threat before then.
- akechi works with sae niijima on the SIU (which i cant remember what that means in the slightest), which has a director who has been speaking repeatedly to someone. both of them know what the metaverse is by name, implying him and his mysterious caller are connected to a metaverse user who is obviously the killer (goro akechi is a metaverse user who's been so for at the very least longer than he lets on and is obviously the killer). siu director and the person hes talking to were very much involved with getting that principal killed. the person hes talking to is likely to be someone in power who hates the phantom thieves and that description fits shido.
- not much more evidence for that, ive been cooking up these theories for months so its really easy to forget details and take long held theories as facts when they could always be false. (example: i actually thought the casino was gonna be shido's palace for a LONG time and i was very surprised to learn it wasnt)
#the majority of this theorizing is really old and i only decided to post it now#because i noticed the guy shot okumura with his left hand in a screenshot i took at the time#ive had akechi kills people theory since the pancake thing tho and its only getting more plausible over time#most of my theories actually ive been thinking about for months#started playing the game in january and ive been making theories ever since#p5#persona 5#p5r#persona 5 royal#persona#persona 5 spoilers#p5 spoilers#goro akechi#masayoshi shido#persona 5 theory
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WIP Weekend
“Did she ever visit you before you became a citizen” Leeg asks
Peeta, answers following his orders, to answer every question asked truthfully, even if the rule is being abused in this case. He sits up.
“Not really, except for after Finnick's wedding, she didn't see me that often. I mean when they had me train here for propos, she was glaring, stewing, and complaining to Plutarch, but I just ignored her, and pretended she wasn't there. You know, when I ate with her in the cafeteria, I’m not kidding, the second Katniss saw me, it looked like she was about to spit out her drink. Dells told me that before her trip to the nut, Katniss watched me ranting. It is said that my insane screeching drove her all the way to District 2.”
Leeg tells him, “When you invited Pissy did she show you any compassion? Or was it all about her?”
“It hasn’t gone well, I’m not proud of the way I treated people then. I insulted everyone, even Prim, and when I lashed at Johanna, I got a well deserved punch in the face. Today is the first day we've been civil to each other since my rescue. I still don't know why she even made the visit, or why she even bothered with Haymitch's updates. Did I answer your question?”
“She's a piece of work, we all know that, we love listening to your roasts of Catpiss, I bought a tape recently, it’s comedy gold! I order you to tell us about the time you visited her.” Tong says
Peeta rolls his eyes “Where did you get the tape?” Peeta sounds mad.
Leeg says: “An order is an order, comply, forget about the tape”
Peeta continues: “When she for some reason visited me, I struck where it hurt, she was forced to be a star-crossed lover even in private, or Snow would come after her. They even made her cheat on Gale with me. I twisted the knife and called her a peice of work. But that’s not all, you see, I was trying to find out why Peeta Mellark loved her, and insulting her at the same time. "
Tong says "Yeah she's short and ugly, and not particularly nice"
"That’s literally the bar I set, childish mudslinging." Peeta complains.
"It's the only bar Catpiss deserves, your orders are to reveal, what else? " Tong Says.
"In the cafeteria I was so petty, I roasted everyone at the table. I joked about taking Annie from Finnick, and she was still mad at me about it when I reached out to her and Finnick. I'm glad, they were willing to forgive me. Katniss seemed pretty devastated by the things I said to her, that shallow look in her grey eyes speaks for itself. No, I’m not sure if she was just insulted or if my words have some sort of deep effect on her. Does she actually care about what I say because I’m the one who said them? I don’t know.”
“Shallow teenage relationships aren't the same thing as real love, lovers don't abandon each other in their time of need” Leeg says
“yeah I know that's what Coin said" says Peeta
“And Coin as always is right” Tong says
Peeta says, “I've thought about it alot, and gone over all my interactions with her, I'm not Katniss but she could just as well be grieving me, and it would look no different from not caring at all. If Katniss was my lover and not Gale’s I don’t want to know the effect my words would have on her"
Tagging
@mollywog @persephoneprice @rosegardeninwinter @waywardangel-wilds(what's in the next chapter of a boy a girl and everything else? @strawberrymelllark @mega-aulover @writejenwrite @justafewberries @pitualba2015 @bentknife @tenaciousmoneymuffinzine @fyreflys @arthdoesart @dumbasswhorebug @the9thring @unnamednarrator @tryingssss @cutpaperbleedswater @arxhslayer @cutchh @eleanorjane0690
#the hunger games#peeta mellark#everlark#katniss and peeta#mockingjay#suzanne collins#thg katniss#katniss everdeen#thg#finnick odair
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everything Dan said about labels in BIG was so extremely real and personal to me and people really gloss over a lot of it sometimes I need to talk about it more about it when I'm not exhausted
#he spent years trying to fit into one box or another and then he finally said ah fuck this lmfao#ppl really ignore the “basically” part of basically im gay and it's like you'll get crucified if you point out the nuance#which he himself has talked about so many times#idk why celebrating someone's gayness for what it is in its own esoteric way in their own words is some kind of erasure#i guess because of the issue of ppl calling him bi because they're stupid and don't know how labels work lmao#but that aside i love that he rly is just dan and he's comfortable with that#because it's so hard not fitting into a certain ideal#the part where he said he recognises labels are really important for a lot of people and that's very valid#but he just doesn't give a fuck lmfao like....... i felt that#i felt like him saying “being a man means nothing to me” and then talking about “you could call me she or put me in a dress i wouldn't gaf”#and then calling himself a formless blob or whatever#he literally is just dan whatever that means whatever labels most closely approximate that and there rly is something so powerful#in just not giving a fuck especially on the internet where everyone is so hyper obsessed with labeling everything#and like thinking it's weird for someone to just not really care that much about labels#i feel like so many people misunderstand what he was trying to say in that part idk#like based on the amount of dangender haters#he really just does not give a fuck i fear being a man means nothing to him even if he is one like he just doesn't care#and that's so powerful <3 to me#who up not fitting into a box and feeling lost and untethered because every label you could possibly use makes you feel uncomfortable#on some level#because even trying to be unlabeled is a label in and of itself#i need Dan's therapist's number i think they could fix me#he is just not a labels guy and i love him for that i think it's very powerful and valid when people find joy and solace in labels#but it's also powerful to me when people just don't care for labels at all hadfghgfjkllsfjl#and i think that gets overlooked a lot on the anti nuance website#i love seeing posts celebrating him for being gay gay homosexual gay but i also love seeing posts celebrating him for being a formless blob#he can contain multitudes#and we can celebrate all of that per his own words#without necessarily erasing part of him#i said i wasn't gonna talk about this and then reached the tag limit lmfao i have a PROBLEMMMMM
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saw one of my con friends post a cease and desist in 3 languages on twitter because someone colored and reposted one of their artworks and all I could think was petit bourgeois behavior... I fear I need to get a real job I can't stay like this anymore. this + the reaction to the gh*bl* trend I think is really bringing out the worst of the online freelance artists...
#just thinking thoughts...#I don't know... it's all so surreal to me#I was drawn to posting things online because it meant people could see it for free#like online manga scanlations are all free you know? I think in a perfect universe everything should be like that#it's just so weird that people are now going NOBODY CAN PLAY WITH MY TOYS anymore about it#like brother was the point not everyone being able to play with your toys?#there is just such an intense lack of historical context among online freelancers it's so frustrating#like you all would have been haters when photography and collage and dadaism came around.#and you would have been on the wrong side of it. AI is literally just another iteration of this.#there is no 'spark of the artistic spirit' you stupid slut! ! ! !#PLUS THE GH*BL* THING IS DRIVING ME CRAZYYYYYY#I'm seeing posts like 'm*y*z*k* is trying to say that art is about HUMANITY!!!'#brother. he could not acknowledge the humanity of the victims of japanese imperial violence what are you talking abttttttttttt#be objective. don't let the fact you like something cloud your judgement abt it.#like I like bm for sure but as I'm learning more about things I'm growing more convinced that the work is trotskyist in nature#and I'm not sure I agree w trotskyism. but you gotta be able to look and see what's actually there#and it just really feels like people are willfully being ignorant abt myzki.
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At the end of the day, is kin just someone who identifies as their kintype or not? Is it anyone who actually identifies as their kintype, or do they have to perform all these 'correct' behaviours and social dances to prove that you kin- pardon, that you are kin- correctly?
#beep boop#sorry i got fucking salty on this last one bc its fucking annoying people reblogging a version of that post with dumb misinformation about#how introjects work and whoes entire argument is 'well kin as a verb doesnt work for literally everyone therefore you should stop using it#person who it works for'#when my partner and i both already took down why thats a bad argument but no one bothers to check the fucking notes#and its most useful for fictionkin anyways and then a bunch of dragons and canines are saying well i dont have a use for it#so therefore its bad!#on his post about how HE PERSONALLY USES IT and people turning into like hes commenting that eveyrbody and their dog should use it#LEABVE HIM ALONE#LEAVE VALENTINO ALONE#sorry. i dont mind discussion but it pisses me off when shit we already explained is being ignored#And saying you wouldnt invalidate someone for using it while coming onto someones post about how they personally use it#and admonishing them for doing that#hm.#and this tying back to my very origional post on the topic#which was about how coming at people for how they talk makes the community hostile#regarudless of if you like it or not#can you . consider. minding your bees neez?#and everybody all up about the harm kff do meanwhile using kin as a verb doesnt make you kff and you can spread correct info while still#verbing it#and second of all i have seen new questioning otherkin literally harassed and driven out of wanting to every interact with the kin communit#because of the hostility twoards people who use 'incorrect' lanauge#WHIHC WAS WHAT I WAS ORIGIONALLY TALKING ABOUT#BUT NO ONE WANTS TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT DO THEY?#IS DOING DAMADGE TO HE KINMUNNITY SUDDENLY NOT IMPORTANT NOW#IF YOU DONT GET TO GO AROUND AND ENFORCE SOME RULES?#kin discourse#kin as a verb#anyways if you encourage people to be alowed to police behaviour in this way#which is what you are doing if youre saying no one should be allowed to do it which is what the argument people are making is
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…is it considered moving too fast to have added my new work bestie to my insta close friends two weeks into this thing…
#i wasn’t expecting everyone at work to be so nice… the guy at the desk across from me always grabs me an orange because they go quickly#one person on the neighboring team got me hello kitty keychains because i mentioned liking sanrio during our first conversation???#i met work bestie on the first day literally right in the lobby and once we started talking we hit it off#during the day we send each other slack messages even though we’re not in the same dept and we always have lunch together 😭#she told me that at her prev job she tried to befriend people on their team and they literally ignored her?#like she tried to invite them to lunch and stuff and they Never talked to her or accepted her invitations 😭 literally insane…#anyway! i got her mug for her desk because she said she wanted to start decorating it and idk#besides the fact that i’m like mad on her behalf at her previous coworkers? and the fact that we became such fast friends…#i just love giving people gifts even though i worry i come on too strong#but i figured that it’s better to risk being too much than to withdraw into myself and never connect with others bc i’m too scared
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#that post is interesting and i dont wanna rb bc i dont feel like i can get my points across in the tags and i dont wanna deal with ppl but#like i fully agree that healthcare workers deserve a billion percent more protections at work and better work conditions#but i dont like the insinuation that people just being petty because they think 'their bully is a nurse now so who cares'#like i literally went to a protest during covid that had to do partially with unfair treatment toward healthcare workers#and you know what happened? we had to leave barely an hour in because two unmasked nurses were mad my friend was disabled#and ive watched a nurse file a report on a 'threatening' patient#a disabld patient who couldnt get up and use the bathroom unassisted was asking for help. asking politely then louder then begging for help#i told the nurse and other employees in the waiting room. they said rhey didnt want to help them go to the bathroom because#it wasnt their job#i was injured and sick and unable to help. i asked them to please help her. they ignored me and made that woman wet and mess herself#in her chair in front of everyone in the waiting room. and when that patient yelled at them#crying and humiliated and upset and said she was going to report them and get them fired the nurse called security#saying she was goinf to kick her out if she was loud again#so like. idk! using the example of an older woman of color being beaten nearly to death by a white man#to try and claim that people are just being misogynists by criticizing health care workers#feels really weird!#that post also claims that most nurses are poc when the RN workforce is 80% white people#so it just feels very disingenuous and gross iwl
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#long talk in tags incoming i guess#i don't understand why people keep following me when everything i do is complaining lately#and not about dnp per se. but about how the work is done and how their team *coughs* martyn *coughs* is handling stuff#i'm just looking at all this mess and i can't agree with basically anything#everything goes against my beliefs when it comes to work organisation. customer focus and etc.#and i'm trying SO hard to mildly help for free. and i'm just getting ignored. but that's like.. basic fixing and shit#any decent company would do it and say thank you for noticing and letting us know#but not irl merch lmao#and it all feels and looks like a massive joke#and i'm so so tired to basically pay for existence of this mess#i'm rethinking a lot of tour related decisions i made. and i know the reason i made them was about travelling more than the show itself#so i don't completely regret it#i'm just so tired of being spat in the face (figuratively speaking) over and over again#and tired of no one taking their job seriously ffs#neither martyn nor dnp nor their fucking editors#and i'm doing all that not for attention or whatever. but because I really care for the words to be correct and for the fucking text..#.. to be in the middle. like idc about the credit or WHO i need to ask for it to be fixed. i just want it to be fixed#so it looks good and how it should look#like. it's not that hard to put a little care into the things you do and getting paid for#I don't understand how it became so normalized. how being a bad manager is okay if you work with a fanbase and you're a 'small company'#a small company who has more than enough money to hire people to check things btw. if only anyone cared#i'm just so so tired of caring. because apparently it's not something everyone else does.#and i can let it slide when it comes to dnp. they are not being literally hired to do it. but others..... yeah#today was a moment when i thought 'that's a perfect opportunity to leave. enough.'#but the tour is in 1.5 months and i have tickets so i can't leave lmao#what kind of joke that is? oh and i know i'm fully responsible for this mild breakdown#personal
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I just woke up and now im having a panic attack because some overfried orange bigotted dictatorial asshole (and a bunch of red elitist capitalistic shitheads) was given too much power and now they’re starting to try and fucking axe literal safe spaces for queer people and minorities on the fucking internet as long as the base of operations are in their fucking country……..
And the thing is its just the start too…
#vent#like WHAT THE FUCK#fuck- i cant- my head is too loud right now…#i am furious and in despair and stressed#and its most definitely NOT ONLY GOING TO BE A THING THAT WILL AFFECT ***ONLY*** THE PEOPLE IN THAT COUNTRY BC FUCK#THESE SITES ARE USED GLOBALLY TOO FOR FUCK SAKE#PEOPLE NEED TO STOP BEING IGNORANT AND APATHETIC ABOUT IT JUST BECAUSE THEY THINK ITS NOT GOING OT AFFECT THEM#*BECAUSE IT IS.*#AND ITS JUST STARTING TOO…#FUCK ITS GIVING DYSTOPIAN VIBES FOR FUCK SAKE#HAVE WE NOT LEARNED?!??????#SO MANY AUTHORS HAVE WRITTEN SO MANY STORIES ABOUT IT…#AND WE HAVE LITERALLY HAD A WHOLE HISTORY TO LOOK BACK ON#DON’T FORGET.#AND WHO AM I KIDDING IT ALREADY STARTED LONG AGO. IT WAS ALWAYS THEIR PLAN ALL ALONG#AND ITS JUST GOING TO GET WORSE MOVING FORWARD!#AND WE CANT JUST STAND AND JUST *WATCH.* OR FACE THE OTHER DIRECTION.#BECAUSE ALL THIS IS EVER GOING TO LEAD IS TO EVERYONE’S SUFFERING.#except for those these shit benefits. which is basically those on top#fuckhhhhhh#DUDE IM NOT EVEN FROM THAT FUCKING COUNTRY AND ITS STRESSING ME OUT!!! LIKE FFS THESE SITES HAVE BEEN MY SAFE SPACES SINCE I WAS A KID#AND NOT JUST ME BUT FOR MANY OTHERS!!! SO MANY OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS AND ACQUAINTANCES ONLINE???! IVE MET DUE TO THESE SITES#AND NOW THERES A HUGE FUCKING CHANCE THAT ITS GOING TO BE TAKEN AWAY BECAUSE PEOPLE WERE STUPID ENOUGH TO WAVE AWAY THESE ASSHOLES’#ATROCITIES AND PUT THEM IN POWER *AGAIN* ANYWAY#the system is working as intended#and it is fucking everyone over#aster rant
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society if hoo had them at uni age and the lost trio went to chb and chiron is like "how tf are ANY of u alive and unclaimed". wilderness was just community college.
#on a serious note this changes a lot actually. annabeth and percy would not be in chb anymore so when percy goes missing#its like. a genuine possibility and fear because demigods don't make it that old. there is also some added time between tlo and tlh as well#further adding to jasons isolation as being even WEIRDER than everyone else. he also would've been praetor for longer so maybe the romans#wouldve cared more. this also does away with the plot hole of ppl not giving a shit that jason piper and leo (and dylan) straight up#dipped. introducing piper especially to a summer camp makes chb less appealing because they're too old for that and thus makes their#departure from chb make more sense in toa. yet also it opens up the possibility of new rome uni.... which i cannot see any reason as to why#leo would not go there!!!!! outside of being banned cuz he bombed new rome lol. but pipers sexuality arc works for college too!!! ur never#too old to find urself. but also this is the question of if you are able to relatively function in society (this is more for piper leo fran#and i guess percy) then why would you even fight this prophecy??? anyway lol them being college aged is perfect cuz percy is literally#going to a new place and having a new transition with new ppl... like u do in college LOL. now the question is would hazel still be 13. nic#is a lot older at this point and perhaps has the same age gap as bianca and him did 🤔 cant remember. but also don't know why hazel was 13#in the first place lol. idk. in my college hoo she is just a senior in hs about to graduate from spqr and thinking about staying there or#possibly going to newru after seeing frank make the decision the previous year! SAD!#anyway in hoo. percy and annabeth are sophomores. frank and the lost trio are freshman.#but then in toa. percy annie frank and the lost trio are all graduating cuz percy got held back and Annabeth failed after tartarus fr.#but then also know that piper never went to newru and is adamant about going to mortal uni. and leo kills in newru but is bored. nvm i#forgot he died 🧍♂️ ummmmmm ok. ignore leo. and jason actually. so um. ok that really threw me off but are u getting it. that's when apollo#is like 'heeyyyyy i need help pwease 🥺' and they're all like 'dude.'#OK!#but also i ackowedge that this is a children's book and i am not its demographic so god be with you.
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Sounds like you've got a right bitch of a co-worker based on those post tags lol
ajfksdljf TT0TT Oh that was like my 3rd version of a post I made. I had to talk myself down and censor myself akljsdflkfa orz
But yes he really is. I cannot stress it enough that everyone hates his guts and he's created such a hostile work environment.
#silly asks#the junpei coworker#silly answers#god i hate him so much#he's not the first jackass i've had to work with but god he is the most recent#i should've called HR last night#i literally told him “do NOT fucking finish that sentence or train of thought”#and then he kept ALLUDING to what he wanted to say and i had to keep telling him to stfu#then he hid in the bathroom for 30 min (which pissed me off mORE because it meant he got a free 30 break and was paid for it)#all while i was left alone to wrangle a circus by myself#he was watching anime fyi...cause I could hear it when I had to go to the back room to get stuff#like we had a store meeting and my boss listed a bunch of stuff that needed to be minded#and like HALF of it was directed at junpei (he didn't look at him but WE ALL KNEW)#my boss even confirmed it when everyone else left#he only confirmed it because as soon as they left I turned to him an was like 'when is that mfer getting fired?????!"#my boss wants to fire him but HIS boss says he can't until they find a replacement#the bar is in hell rn#it's so bad that me and my other coworker made a bingo of shit he likes to pull on shift (HE'S THAT CONSISTENT)#*looks at sched* oh thank god I dont need to see him today or tomorrow-#WAIT NO I HAVE TO WORK WITH HIM THE ENTIRE CLOSE FRIDAY NOOOOO FUCK save tme this is gonan suck#i'm kinda hoping he gets “sick” again I'd rather work alone TT0TT#*inhales* it'll be fine it'lle be fine it'll be fine it'll be fine#zen zen centered i am zen...I'll listen to an audio book or video i'll be ok#i'll just ignore him like i've been doing TT0TT#silly vents#vents#irl bs
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