#it's frustrating bc i just feel that there's a straight
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caernua · 11 months ago
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if i beat my gym anxiety this year i will literally be unstoppable
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manasurge · 6 months ago
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Just a bit of lore relevant vent art (with terrible proportions bc apparently I mess that up horribly when I'm tired ugh. Watch me regret posting this tomorrow. The head size is already driving me mad bc it's too big, and I can feel myself wanting to abort this mission already) of Mourynn just, lying down on top of one of those large elevated Pale Tree roots far above the Grove (and far away from everyone else), and during the time between the early years and before the Personal story. Caithe is gone (Destiny's Edge), Wynne is gone (bc well, y'know...), even Faolain is gone (bc of Caithe in DE), and she's just feeling miserable, lost, and alone. (Her hair is in between her sapling hair and the Zhaitan hair, so it's grown out a bit bc she's depressed, and she's meant to be in the new outfit she designed, but I'm in the process of redesigning it a bit, so I've made a few tentative changes for now. Her collar is now just an extension of her clavicle leaves which can be put up like a collar, or can be draped down over her shoulders or back)
#gw2#sylvari#artgallery#mourynn#mourynn art#I've just been so tired lately bc of work#also just going a bit stir crazy with the silence (lonely; but alas I unfortunately suck at starting convos bc I have nothing interesting t#talk about and work has been draining my social energy; making it even harder :( (I'd rather burn the social energy with friends yknow?)#it's getting a wee bit better; but I haven't had much time or energy to even game while we're in the midst of our busiest season :(#I miss hanging out and chatting with my buds; but the universe insists on keeping us apart :(#just miss having something to look forward to throughout my day. Been trying to fill it with other things; but the depresso is overriding i#Mostly just been me with my thoughts and that is just bad bc I got so many horrors in there lmao.#I wanna at the very least; draw more or game more to distract from it; but work is sapping all my time and energy from it.#but also it's very quiet on my end and it's kicking my overthinking into overdrive so I#Ive just been fighting with my mind lately lmao#hopefully this will all pass soon so I won't obsessively keep thinking about it loll#lol I'd post this in the servers but it's vent art so it feels a bit weird to do; so it's going straight to home video w/o a theater releas#hopefully once work calms down it'll help#(I have so many long shifts makes me so frustrated bc I hate them and I run out of steam half way through)#other than all that I'm doing fine lol. My brain's always been like this; But I usually only get like this during the winter season#(bc of the holidays making everything quiet and also the SAD) so it feels weird having this exact same feeling happen to me in July lol
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shima-draws · 1 year ago
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Actually curious as to what people’s general opinion of Ozbert is in this year of 2023. Does shipping them equate to getting hashtag cancelled? Are they still The OTP of the series?? Or are they strictly Platonic Besties For Life. I do not know
It’s weird tho bc obviously if you’ve read the manga you KNOW their situation is very Complicated™️. When they were both the same age it was fine but then Oz got yeeted into the Abyss and time jumped 10 years forward while he was in there for like 3 days and suddenly Gil’s like. 9 years older than him. But then Uncle Oscar still classifies Oz as being 25 even tho he’s physically 15. And then we find out that Oz’s body isn’t even HIS it belongs to Jack so that’s messed up. AND we find out Gil’s actually not just 24 he’s OVER 100 years old bc Baskerville shit. And THEN we find out Oz is actually the true B Rabbit so that makes it so he’s probably even older than Gil is. When we get to the end of the series they’re both canonically confirmed to be hundred(s) of years old so I’m sitting here like. Well,
ALSO looking at these manga panels and official artworks and stuff from the anime I’m like
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Well, there’s definitely SOMETHING going on there, that’s for sure,
#And don’t even get me STARTED on the omakes. Holy shit#Shima speaks#Anyway either way they are a wonderful duo.#Gil’s always been SO ride or die for Oz and I respect that#I just see them together and I’m like 🥰 There they are. My boys#Pandora Hearts spoilers#Pandora Hearts#Ozbert#Oz Vessalius#Gilbert Nightray#They’re not straight. I know THAT for a fact. LOL#And see there’s the appealing thing. The absolute ANGST involved#Gil who grew up harboring feelings for Oz but knowing it was wrong and that he could never ever act upon them#And by the time he’s an adult he still has some sort of feelings for Oz. It’s very complex#And then out pops Oz from the Abyss!! And he doesn’t look ANY different from the last time Gil saw him#Meanwhile Oz who was still figuring things out but who was almost sure he liked Gil That Way#And then it hits HARD when he’s in the Abyss not even knowing if Gil is alive#And when he finds out Gil’s all grown up.#I mean YEAH I’d develop a massive crush too are you KIDDING#It’d be frustrating tho bc Oz is still technically a teenager.#But then he figures out oh hey I’m actually? A being that’s existed for a LONG long time. And one that isn’t even human#So I can totally see him whole heartedly chasing after Gil once he realizes that#Anyway. Rant over sorry LOL#Either way. Again. They’re so so close in canon there is SOMETHING going on between them#(Not to mention the fact the anime really loved that and tried hinting at it super obviously)
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capricioussun · 9 months ago
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Will probably delete later but genuinely WHY do so many ppl hate uf papyrus. "He’s horrible and a bad brother and abusive >:(((" my guy. YOU made him that way
#always weirds me out when a really bad take becomes popular fanon and ppl treat it like it's an inherent universal take#happens to all characters I feel but it's esp frustrating when it's not just a bad take but just straight making a character a certain way#as a plot device. or to project ur own issues onto. at that point just. make an oc or smth. why mangle a character so severely. what is#the purpose#im not even going to TRY to pretend i have perfect ic flawless interps (I absolutely don't and know this)#but even w/ characters I have minimal interest in (like asgore for ex) it's important to me to at least *try* to keep them in line w/ their#og counterparts.#and you'd think. given how so many ppl infantilized Papyrus. that some of that would've bled thru into au counterparts#but nope. the fanon versions are practically just wholly different characters who just look similar and 'fill the same role' in their au#and it's honestly not like there's a shortage of other characters sans could have a toxic relationship with in uf#(bc let's be honest here that's 90% of the reason uf papyrus got characterized that way. for ppl to project onto and sympathize with sans)#I don't like having strong negative opinions on things and I especially don't like talking abt them publicly but idk if it's just weird#timing or smth I've seen so many bad takes the past couple weeks#to each their own and I'd never like. bash someone for having a diff take than me. I just don't...understand.#idk#I'm really tired and my eyes are sticky so I really shouldn't even be posting rn bc I will see this later and be like#can't BELIEVE that guy posted an opinion on the internet. WHY would he do that
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I finally saw the mean girls musical (the movie one) I have so many fucking thoughts oh my god
#thoughts#oni talks#mean girls 2024#I think I may be the only person to kind of like it? like don’t get me wrong it is kinda ROUGH but it has so much potential and there’s bits#and pieces that I actually really enjoy or wish they had more of or just aahh#I’ve been nonstop thinking about the ideal version in my head like there’s so much potential obviously I’m biased by like a lot#since for one I know I tend to like stuff other people hate or don’t like but for two this sequel was weirdly way more relatable so maybe#I’m just projecting from my own personal experiences but Idc the POTENTIAL THERES SO MUCH ID WANNA DO INSTEAD#like there’s so many little details and characterizations that I wish was expanded on or fleshed out and it’s just like it feels like either#half baked or that it’s gone through too many edits it’s like it’s scared to exist?? like there’s some differences I love and wish they lol#leaned into but it’s like it was terrified to be too different? or like they were rushing the end especially#like in my ideal form it’s a tv show coz I think they honestly have enough that could be genuinely expanded in a way more interesting way#via that format probably not like a super extended series like you COULD but you’d definitely need more expansion but I could see the potent#but like idk one SOLID musical season with expanded character story and not like one of those rush cram shows like a good solid one#like Regina’s characterization is so fascinating but also feels like slightly off and like they could’ve leaned way more into things?#like I think keeping Regina as a closeted lesbian gives the greatest potential and interest for an expanded story#like I loved maybe the first half of the movie the most like that one song she sang to manipulate Aaron would work so much more perfectly if#she’s singing it about/to Cady? I also think in my ideal brain an cool flashback episode for Janis and Regina would be so cool coz there’s#so much you could flesh out in a flashback than you could in a retelling which while I do like the retelling since it lets you imagine thing#I just! potential! I also want more of them interacting and I do think changing Janis to be a lesbian works if they leaned more into it?#I also think in my ideal form janis would have more comeuppance or acknowledgement of her shit? I also think an arc of Regina coming out#like one thing they missed from the original is Regina playing soccer at the end & I think they could hint more towards that and maybe lean#more into her at home life in an expanded story way coz her mom is clearly like… yikes. granted maybe some of my views on the movie are too#biased by personal experience but like the way she snaps at her mom usually in my experience isn’t out of nowhere? like parents behind#closed doors. or frustrations with what her mom has clearly been putting on her the way she tells her mom not to talk about her body is very#like idk a lot of the characters in this version feel more real to me bc they act really similar to people I know irl so the expanded story#could be cool. another one that in my ideal brain would have more is Gretchen and especially her relationships with Regina as well as with#that one guy and her parents I wanna see more of how that works and her arc to feel more meaningful when she dumps him & mentions family#also as much as I didn’t care much for the straight plot stuff there’s 100% missed potential there that I could see in the differences like#iirc in the original it’s regular algebra not AP calc which I think could’ve been used as an interesting characterization opportunity for
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phagodyke · 3 months ago
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aouuugh my uterus......
#long long day at work codeine wasnt helping with cramps and my meds are less effective on my period :(#ive been doing okay most of the day tho just starting feeling kind of miserable omw home bc such a long wait at the bus stop in pain#and im kind of lonely at the moment but wont be able to climb tomorrow bc of cramps so thats my main social source gone :(#and it always feels worse at home bc if im having a hard time like in physical pain or feeling down my roommate cant rly handle it#like she cant rly be in the room with me the headphones go straight on. which is ok im realising its just how her type of autism works#so im trying not to get as upset at her abt it. with varying degrees of success but it just takes time#i mean i dont get upset AT her like ik its not her fault and i dont want her feeling like it is. I keep it internal + cry once im alone#just different social needs n boundaries innit. we're a bit incompatible is all#but its still hard. I'd like support from other ppl when I'm struggling i mean i think thats a fairly normal thing to want#but of the friends I would be comfortable talking to abt how i feel none of them have that kind of emotional availability#which again is ok like its not on them. and im very capable of dealing w my shit myself one way or another so its not a Need#but idk. it would just be nice. I feel like I've had to be so independent most of my teenage and adult life and I wish I could take a#break from that sometimes. even just a hug would be nice man#sorry i always come on here and talk abt the same problems... well youll see me do it again no doubt abt that 🫠#ughh and i feel so guilty for wanting things ppl cant give even though i know its not really my fault either and im allowed to want things#and i dont cross boundaries or make them feel bad abt it. i really hope i dont anyway. but still ahhh...#its so hard for me to feel connected to anyone if they cant rly engage w me emotionally at all like its a non negotiable#factor into closeness and trust for me and i get so frustrated bc i feel so distant and alienated from the ppl i care abt most#and ik i overreact bc of my rsd so maybe its just that its probably not even a real issue. but its real to me bc im the one who gets upset#man. anyway its okay just a really really long day. im gonna wash my dishes and then shower#and finish my book. maybe i should play some dead cells i miss it. i dont really want to think abt how i feel anymore#maybe ill see if anyones free to hang out tmr evening so i dont have to feel as lonely even if i cant leave the house after work#all good nice to have a plan anyway. done sniffling. my hot water bottle is helping thr cramps a littlr i think#.diaries#oh i dont think its helping actually ow. i took more codeine an hour ago why doesnt it do anything. not fairrr 😭
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tyrannuspitch · 11 months ago
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i think. i should read more comics.
#space viking tag#i'm just not particularly interesting in the reincarnation plotline and that's what everyone always recommends so idk where to start#idk. i mean. maybe i shouldn't. i haven't really vibed with any non-mcu stuff i've encountered so far#including aoa which is often regarded as like. the peak of marvel loki. it was good! but it wasn't rlly for me.#i have a soft spot for toa bc it's whimsical and charming and prequelesque but i also have so many complaints#idk. hmmm.#i should probably look for some thor-centric stuff but i also dk if that will do aaanything i'm interested in#bc i *like* him in context with loki and i like going teehee he's not so heroic after all he's actually extremely LIKE LOKI#and i get a strong impression that his appeal in comics is much more straightforward like... they're playing it all straight#he just Is A Hero and the complexity is that he USED to be a bully. while i prefer BOTH of those things to be much much greyer#idk.......#at least when i'm engaging w/ stuff even if it is frustrating it keeps me thinking abt thor which i always on some level enjoy <3#i've felt so unfocused and untethered since like. november :-: i need my obsession back!!#it's even fun just to like. see their little faces.#comics thor is not rlly my boy but he's the root of my boy so w/e i see him on some like marvel postcard or whatever in a shop#i still get to go teehee it's my little guy :)#but i'm not a merch person at all interestingly enough. if i buy an object i WILL forget it exists within a week#maybe not if it had a practical function?#but i feel like over time that would fade into visual noise too like oh these are just my. oven gloves or whatever.#anyway what was i talking about
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shirogane-oushirou · 6 months ago
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[cw vent: chronic illness, general world politics mention w no detail)
"man. i'm so tired. i feel like i can't do anything selfship related. is it because my energy's been sapped from family visiting and everyone wanting to do ~summer activities~ nonstop? am i so in my head about "getting ren's story right without stepping over any lines" that i've backed myself into a perfectionist corner? is the world just going to shit so hard that i can't have one (1) minute of escape on this blog before going back to working through the political hellscape we're in? god even trying to make this plushie pattern is killing me even though i want to hold my guy So Badly AUGH."
/finishes the plushie pattern after trying multiple body bases and literally buying a japanese ebook about plushie face and hair design/
"actually what if i lived forever and spent all of that time making an army of these fuckers to swim in? what then?"
#obviously tagging this as#vent -#lol. lmao. anyway.#when i say i spent all day on this... jumping from base to base trying to find one that worked well for what i wanted#and had the right face shape and the easiest way to map a face onto it and know it'll look Right when embroidered...#and then i just caved and bought a book i'd been looking at since i started making mini ren lol#(by p.iyo p.icco -- their y.outube videos influenced mini ren's design and i plan to give that credit once i post final pics#along with the person who made the 10cm doll base i used.)#and it took so much effort and i kept thinking about how Fucking Tired i am and how frustrating it is that playing cards w family#means i have to spend 2 days recovering bc sitting up + in a chair w no good support + mental games + being social = negative battery.#and then i keep going in circles about ren's backstory and the whole 'this is a story about conditions i have but for anyone#who doesn't know me it DEFINITELY reads like a gross story about a stigmatized condition i DON'T have so i have to tread#very carefully when writing about it... but i don't practice writing like i practice art so i'm simply not at the skill level#to navigate that and it makes me feel like i can't post any of that until i figure it out' Thing...#but i DID finish my plushie pattern. and i will start on it sometime this week? depending on Factors? and if i reeeeally like how it#turns out i might buy The Plushie Making Fabric™... i checked at a craft store and buying 1/4yd of both fabrics won't break the bank...#and then i could make all of his AU selves w different expressions 😏#anyway. recovery officially starts in a few days (doc appts and pest control coming over this week + dogsitting in a few days.#not great for recovery lol lmao.) so hopefully i'll be more Around here by this weekend. idk. don't hold me to that kjsndkjn#i might get sucked into plushie making again and disappear for 3 days straight kjsdnfkjsdnf ;;;#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]
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robinsnest2111 · 7 months ago
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still feeling bad even after food and a couple hours of sleep. how mean
#one of these days the yearning for an understanding person to come home to at the end of a day will end me#until then i will probably have to complain about my stupid suffering#why must humans be a social species and why must i crave things i cannot have lol#why must i be stuck living with people i cannot ever trust again. want to be around people i like and who i can be vulnerable with#tbh if i still was as whiny in real life as i am on here most days i'd only get to hear 'shut up' and 'tough luck. man up'#and that is Not It. would only make me feel worse. so i keep quiet and keep to myself#which does not solve my original problem at all#maybe one day. maybe one day i can just be a beloved pet that doesn't get scolded or belittled for seeking comfort#that one thing my parents said to me 15 years ago still haunts me#'only people who deserve it get hugs' which was used to deny me comfort/affection. because apparently i am not worthy/deserving 👍#i was 13 going through the most vile shit at school but bc it affected me negatively and my parents didn't like me at my mentally illest#they just straight up denied me any type of comfort or support. took away my belongings. made me stay in my room for months on end#as corrective punishment. but none of it made me better. just made me worse. idk idk idk#all the shit they put me through. the emotional and physical punishments. the beatings borne from frustration#and still some part of me wants to seek comfort from them. BUT I SHOULDN'T. they broke my trust and my heart and soul so many times#it'd be straight up suicide to open up and be vulnerable with them again... lole running chest first into a wall of knives. no.#sorry. really in it tonight. gonna try to be more normal tomorrow
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20w14a · 1 year ago
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Do Unto Others by MSI gives me Elquackity vibes while Pt. 2 gives me Quackity vibes.
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chickenkooks · 2 years ago
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Hi, it's May 2023 now time rly does fly fast huh? I still re-read TRA bec it's my comfort fic. Anyway i hope you're doing well and still having amazing sex lol! I miss hearing bout ur seggs stories and just ur life updates. I hope one day if by chance u can still open this acc, and you'll see our positive messages ahhh! tysm for writing tra really. Every year i still send you an ask it's pathetic jshdhd but i miss you sm my fave writer but I hope u're well, happy and healthy! 💜 it's been what 4 or 5 years but i still won't give up hope that u'll update us someday even if it's just a life update huhueee im just so thankful u wrote tra. And i truly miss you xx take care always!
oh boy so hi i don't even know how many years its been at this point but this message just really warmed my heart and i thought you were owed at least a response!!! thank you so so so much for this kind message. you guys have been getting after me ever since i left and trust me i see every message but i just didn't know what to say? i don't even know how many of you remember me or will even see this. im sorry for that. god i can't believe its been that long. i don't know if ill ever update tra. i really intended to finish and hoped having beta readers would help but.... i think i had left the fandom at that point so it was hard to put myself back in that same space. i really want to say how i intended for it to end but there is a part of me that hopes to finish it. i just don't know when that'll be, if I even decide to. but i've been getting back into writing lately but I post on ao3 now!!! if u guys are at all interested I could answer messages privately? anyway I hope ur doing well too whoever u are and i appreciate u from the bottom of my heart!!!!!! thank you so much for your patience
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dandyshucks · 1 year ago
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waking up to see someone left a semi-self-demeaning reply on a post of mine and i go to their blog just to make sure they're not someone nasty before i reply encouragingly to them, only to see theyre very into the racist white man youtuber profiting off of Algonquian culture that obviously doesnt belong to him 😵‍💫😵‍💫
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gregoftom · 2 years ago
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some of y’all haven’t grown past the treating queer ppl like shit for liking a ship you don’t take seriously stage and it shows
#i think it’s suuuuuper funny that ppl act like only straight girlies like tg lmaooooo#and they act they r the ONLY ones criticising s4 which is uh. not true lmfao#and yk what it’s ok to feel let down by the fact that s3 finale and 4.01 happened and then took a back burner#ppl acting like tg have no focus whatsoever bffr??? lmao they’re one of the favourites of the show#not even shipping perspective - just their writing and interactions you can find article after article abt them/it#so muc as i fucking hate the term bromance that wouldn’t exist in a billion articles if there was nothing#and i’m gonna say smth radical here - it’s ok to like the show mostly for tg#gasp!!!! cant believe ppl might like snth the most that resonates w them or grips them or inspires them to create art/write#as queer ppl maybe it’s nice to see in such a popular and ‘’’serious’’’ show idk. but you get what i mean#and idk man i’m just getting wae flashbacks to years ago when mlm shippers were treated like abso garbage#*war#and yeah ok there ARE some ppl out there who are shitty i’m sure not that i’ve seen any on here but ok. but like. that’s the same for any#group of ppl lmaoooo#‘’’tg shippers are so annoying!!!’’’ why? bc they express frustration at seemingly loose ends of what looked like a tightly written story#abt charas they like togeyher?? no? ok then why speak your mind#and yk i wouldn’t be so skeeved out if it wasn’t ONLY the tg shippers being targeted like. yk how that looks right#literally ain’t seen shit for any other ship or chara enjoyer tbfh#ppl say they hate greg or tom but don’t come after apologists only talk shit abt shippers lol. so it’s ok if it’s not gay gotcha#you see what i mean??? anyway.#sorry for a rant but holy fuck. it’s worse on twitter than on here but 😬
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lovinglin · 1 year ago
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Hgod, okay, I'm a lot more emotional (/neg) rn than I'd like to be so I'm gonna need to ask everyone for a small favor rn (like. Very small favor)
Please be nice to me and my f/o's for the time being. Which, sounds super silly- I know, but I'd really super appreciate it for the time being rn
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lesbiancerseilannister · 1 year ago
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the endless endless takes on queerbaiting turning into like tonedeaf throwing shit at the wall to see what sticks are killing me. i wish that term never got popular. what the fuck do you mean a man wearing a dress or a skirt is only doing that to manipulate women? what the fuck are you talking about. think for two fucking seconds about how that really sounds. please.
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parapsychologicalvulpes · 1 year ago
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hot tip: communication is essential for any relationship but especially so in a communal living situation
pls talk to people im begging
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