#it's been a while since i've worked on this tbh

[zentriii]

omg…mikashou analysis………tell me more…….

mikashou my belovedss <3

woaw this got long, i have a Lot to say tho tbh i could always say More,,,

this started with me thinking abt their relationship in canon, and how little we see of it but how much is implied. like, i think they're adorable but to be clear i'm staying firmly pre-timeskip canon here lol

it's basically a non-linear exploration of how they got together and how they fell apart?? like in canon we see them as exes with a healthy/friendly relationship and i wanted to poke around more with that and the fractures in their romantic relationship >:3c

why'd they break up? how much into that can i dig? what other contributing factors are likely to have been there that weren't mentioned? how do those factors influence their developing high school relationship? how much does the little we have on their personalities affect whatever situations i put them in?

i suppose it's just about growing up and maturing, about expectations vs reality, about relationships [of all sorts] and finding ones that make you happy + that you're at peace with – tricky as that is.

oh and here's your snippet [from one of their first dates]:

“Boo!” Mika claps Daishou’s back lightly. He jumps a little and spins towards her. It’s a shame – she would’ve liked to feel his back for a little longer. “Yamaka-chan, when did you get here?” he asks, opening his arms shyly for a hug. She doesn’t hesitate to snuggle right into him; she’ll get him used to hugging her one day. Mika briefly imagines Daishou greeting her with wide opens arms. Neither of them are quite that bold – but it would be nice. “Just a moment ago, I didn’t want to interrupt.” She smiles sweetly, thinking about the way that girl got her worked up over nothing. She wants to complain, to tell him that she’s the only one allowed to flirt with him, to be in his space, but she doesn’t. Mika doesn’t have the right to claim him for herself yet despite how much she wishes she could. It’s fine. She’ll take all that Daishou’s willing to give her. “Nah, you wouldn’t be. She was just a bit lost.” Daishou’s words don’t change Mika’s feelings in the slightest. Shouldn’t it have? “Come on, let’s go this way.” He leads her off to the start of their date. She manages to stop thinking about that other girl, somewhere in his excited smiles.

ask game post

[raiiny-bay]

considering... changing the boys' hairs... again.....

[blizzardfluffykpop]

alright~ a few updates about everything! so this weekend I'll be seeing changkyun in chicago- so I prolly won't be posting until after I'm alive again from that 😂😅 (I am vv excited about it- I just know I'll be vv tired when I return home). Anyways, I have a few fics in the works~ one of them that is a request 🤭 I'm vv excited to work on them! But I think I'm going to change my masterlist a bit when I come back. I'm going to retire a few groups from the main masterlist and I've been debating for the past year about it... But I think I'm going to add a yearly masterlist- So it would go from most recent to the beginning of this year~

I'm also thinking about changing my pfp- I haven't been really into stray kids for uh... years- But I will be sure to make an update about that if I go thru with that too- (It may be ji changmin next 🫣🤭)

Anyways those are my few updates 🥰💖

[evilkitten3]

someone's been liking a lot of my old posts relating to my attempts to rewrite fairy tail.... which, and this may astound you, is not actually a cancelled project in spite of the fact that it's been nearly a decade since i first started trying to figure it out

[lexydakitten]

mmmmMM i should let myself out of the cage and ramble abt riftlore for a min.. i had such a good thought abt two of the characters last night. i probably should be using the doc i made a few years back to write down / archive those things rather than just pulling it out of my memory whenever but idrc im sleepy. so maybe i will ramble here in a bit or maybe i wont. if i cant get enough of my friends to listen to me abt it or i make up my mind or i feel even the slightest bit prompted enough to i will i think

[kyouka-supremacy]

—

[imwritesometimes]

I think a lot about how if I'd have been born like 200 years ago I would have been sent to the sea side and dosed with cocaine every day for my Mental Maladies but instead I'm walking around in 2024 and ppl are trying to make me feel like shit for not opting into hustle culture or convince me AI & crypto currency are the future...

[famewolf]

my brain has been really out of whack recently (I think it's the time change among other things) so I'm going to try out some things to see if they help

I might not be on social media a whole lot in the next week or two, but if you're mutuals and want my discord, send me a message

[heyitslapis]

Ok

[actual-corpse]

I'm so excited to move out....

I can't sleep😫

[machidielontheway]

.

[prismaticutie]

I've been watching a lot of Omega Strikers guide videos lately and the one thing all of them have in common is that every single one of them highlights the importance of "just have fun".

That's something people say all the time, about any game. But there was one guide I watched yesterday, and in addition to giving that tip, also mentioned the importance of not being toxic and blaming your losses on your teammates.

This is genuinely the most helpful tip of all time. Like this guide really grilled into me just how horrible having that toxic mentality is. The full first minute of the video was dedicated to that. He also talked about how being toxic and playing w that mentality actively makes you worse at the game, period. Full stop. And he explained the reasoning for that as well.

I've heard this said and yeah I believe it as well, but this was the first time I'd ever had it thoroughly explained to me. It really put things into perspective for me.

Hoping I can improve at both Omega Strikers and Splatoon by keeping this in mind 👍

[ninjaliike]

can't believe i missed our 6th birthday here! damn ... time flies, eh? ❤️

[edgepunk]

I'm going to be extra insufferable today bc I had a panic attack yippee

[bright-haired-teacher]

We finished Animal Farm before the break, and this question about gaslighting had some great side-notes from one of my students.  😂 😂

[notmoreflippingelves]

So I know, I know, we all hate it when people add comments and especially lengthy ones to posts that are no openly encouraging them. Nevertheless, I'm gonna do so in this particular case because the novel that I was writing in the tags just got too too long and I was frighteningly close to the tag limit.

The things that would fix Esteban Flores are (in roughly this order)

A found family (preferably one totally divorced from connections to his bio family) and/or a small child to take care of.

A heartfelt apology from his biological family (definitely Luisa, probably Elena, and maybe Francisco as well).

A hug x1000

Being shaken

Enough sleep

But most especially the first two.

Esteban's issues stem from being made to feel like an afterthought and/or an obligation to his family of origin. In his mind, he was not chosen or wanted. He was liked, loved even--but he was loved because he was familia--not because he was Esteban. He was not enough in and of himself, especially not when compared to Elena.

Do you know why he continued to tend the cacao trees during the Dark Times? Yes, it was out of love for his family, but I think there's a bit more to it than that. His abuela shared something private and meaningful (i.e. how to take care of the cacao trees) with him that she didn't also share with Elena. He was welcomed into Luisa's world--if only for a moment. This was his, the rare thing that he didn't have to sacrifice to or share with Elena. No one could take this away from him--the moment of feeling seen and chosen. Not even the fact that this moment was very very much an anomaly and the rest of his youth (and his adulthood) consisted of him being shoved into the corner of some family portraits and left out of others entirely---and no one noticing this for years.

In "Something I Would Never Do," Esteban outright states "Years ago/ I did not know/Just how much they cared for me." He's just now realizing after 40+ years that his family just might love him (50+ years if you go back to when Esteban moved into palace); he's genuinely surprised about it and terrified that he's going to fuck it all up. Yes, Esteban has atrocious self-esteem, but these impressions did not come from nothing. Even now, his family keeps him largely at arm's length. He doesn't appear (or isn't even mentioned) in the two family vacation episodes, suggesting he was left behind. His Navidad plans (the ones he has been dreaming of , all alone for 41 years!) are rejected outright by Luisa, and no one even bothers to ask what the Dark Times were like or how he is coping. Everything has changed and yet nothing has changed. He's there, sometimes he is shown attention and affection, but he's still made to feel that he's not really a part of the family in the same way the others were.

All this is pretty bad in and of itself, but it's made worse by the fact that he's not getting his emotional needs fulfilled from outside the family any more than he is within it. As far as we can tell, Esteban's only real friends as a child were Elena and Victor. (Maybe Felicia as well, but she was far more Elena's friend than his). And neither Victor nor Elena could give Esteban what he needed: the feeling of being liked and chosen for himself and that alone.

Elena is family--the same family has made Esteban feel like an afterthought and obligation, merely liked at best and tolerated at worst. But that's oversimplifying things. Elena is also the impossible gold standard that Esteban will always be measuring himself against. (And it's especially galling that she was 1-2 years younger than him, and he was still nowhere near her level). She's the favorite (and Luisa is not subtle about hiding that fact), the priority, the important one. She's the one who has always been and will always be secure in power and confidence and their familia's love--the exact opposite of Esteban.

Victor, meanwhile, was a horrible influence on Esteban, and not just where Shuriki was concerned. His selfishness rubbed off on his amigo, and his competitiveness and callousness brought out every one of Esteban's insecurities and worst tendencies. It's also very strongly implied that their friendship (at least on Victor's side) was rooted in how 'useful' Esteban was. Through El Segundo, Victor got closer to power/the crown and also found someone that he could feel "superior" to. Someone that Victor could consistently beat at races, so that he could feel like a winner. Someone who wouldn't tell Victor to go to hell if he subjected unflattering nicknames upon.

So yeah, Esteban's childhood primary source of affection/attention outside his family were two people who exacerbated Esteban's already huge inferiority complex. One of whom was part of said family that enabled said inferiority complex in the first place, and the other of whom is wrapped up in the event that caused Esteban to lose his family as well.

And then, Elena was trapped in the amulet and Victor was banished from Avalor, and Esteban was without anyone at all for 41 years. His primary source of attention and affection during this time was the woman who conquered his kingdom and took away his family. Someone who had preyed upon his vulnerabilities from the very start and who kept him alive only so long as he remains obedient and "useful" to her. There's nothing even remotely close to equal or mutual about this dynamic, and Shuriki did even more damage on Esteban's already battered psyche than all of the others combined and multiplied by ten.

Even after Shuriki is gone, Esteban still doesn't have anyone in his life that voluntarily chose to be in his life. His entire social circle is comprised of people that he knows through his family and/or his role as chancellor (and later his magical abilities). There's Naomi, except there isn't, because their dynamic is rooted exclusively in their shared devotion to Elena and their roles on the Grand Council (which is also directly tied to Elena).

Similarly, Doña Paloma interacts with Esteban almost exclusively in reference to his role as Chancellor. Would she give him the time of day if he had no political power or influence?. Doubtful, especially as she seems to really dislike him most of the time. There's a bit more potential for a genuine friendship to develop with Julio or Professor Mendoza, but again, these connections were formed through Esteban's job and we don't really see any interactions that aren't in service to that.

Higgins is explicitly Esteban's employee and given how insensitive he can be to Esteban, it seems unlikely that he has any real non-professional loyalty or affection to him. Same with Armando, except things do seem to a bit more cordial between them.

Esteban seems to have a good rapport with Avalor's allies, especially Toshi and Shoji, but these are unlikely to be anything more than friendly diplomatic connections and ones separated by distance.

So yeah, my boy literally does not interact with a single character on the show without at least one of them doing so out of obligation/duty/job requirement and/or ulterior motive. Fifty years later and almost nothing has changed, Esteban still has nothing and no one to call his own.