#And I know things between us were rocky for a bit before that
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heyitslapis · 2 months ago
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Ok
#kinda vent post cause ive been anxious ever since we got coffee this evening#I promise I'm not trying to be weird or anything. I'm just#I just really don't want to screw this up. I know we spent almost the last year avoiding each other#And I know things between us were rocky for a bit before that#and I hope I'm not overwhelming you. I know things won't be better overnight#I know we've distanced so much and theres so much awkward history there. I know things are different now#And I respect that. I respect your relationship and your new life. I'm not trying to impose or make you uncomfortable#I'm just anxious and tbh scared an nervous too. I don't want to fuck this up. If theres a chance for us to be close friends again I want it#Im so so so scared of fucking it up. I feel like I forgot how to be friends & after the way I left things Im scared that I lost my chance#I'm scared that it's not gonna work and that a permanent goodbye is in our future. I'm scared that you won't want me around after all#I would understand if that became the case.. but I really don't want that#I cant text you this without seeming like an overbearing clingy anxious mess of an ex but ive been on the verge of a panic attack all night#just for the fear that I'm fucking up already somehow. Just the fear that this isn't going to work and I shouldn't even try#I think I spent so long avoiding you that now I don't know what to do with myself. But I'm trying to be normal#I promise I dont have any motives other than missing a really great friendship and being tired of missing friends#And maybe I still have a ways to go in the emotional healing department but I think I'm ok enough to try. I've been ok for a while now#If you see this please know that I mean every word. If you never see it thats ok because I just need to get it off my chest before I burst#I don't want to scare you off or lose you again. if thats what it comes to then know I'll always miss and appreciate you for all my days#Thats all. Ive been a ball of nerves all evening & I just needed to air this out cause having this weight sitting on my chest is too much#emma rambles#personal#vent post
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goldustwomun · 7 months ago
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bags (s.h.)
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pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader
summary: you'd loved steve since you were fifteen, followed him wherever he went. so when you were finally over him, stumbling home with another man clinging to your side, why was he waiting by your doorstep?
warnings: (unedited) angst angst angst, best friend robin and nancy but also lovers <3 robin and nancy <3, swearing, drinking, clubbing/partying, self-deprecating thoughts and a stubborn reader, steve is kind of an asshole despair and dread lol, this went a route i hadn't expected but i'm feeling achey and sad tonight so :) enjoy :) and don't hate me!
wc: 2.2k+
note: i hope this isn't entirely ass lol i just want steve harrington to break my heart but like i cant put my ideas into words and its SO FRUSTRATING but whatever :’)
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Can you see me? I'm waiting for the right time I can't read you, but if you want, the pleasure's all mine Can you see me using everything to hold back? I guess this could be worse Walkin' out the door with your bags
You should’ve known it’d end up this way. His back, coloured shades of blue and purple as dusk kissed at his skin, retreating into the distance and down the very road you’d just stumbled up only moments earlier. Maybe if you had listened a little closer, noticed a little more, the way he grabbed at your waist, squeezed your palms, held you close, you could’ve avoided it all. The shock and heartbreak and unbearable yearning only to turn up empty and desolate all over again.
Because you loved Steve Harrington, in more ways than he would ever know, but it had taken days, months, years, even, to get over that initial infatuation and belly flutter you’d been plagued with as teenagers. He was King Steve and you but a peasant, a shadow, one of many, that flocked to his side when he waved or smiled or tripped you up.
You loved Steve Harrington, but you hated him for waiting so long to work up the courage to just say it. I love you; I’ve always loved you, you wanted to say, but the words refused to pass the seal of your lips and instead you were left gaping at an empty spot on the ground, a Steve-shaped hole in your heart.
It’d been days since you’d seen him last, mourning his absence but refusing to sit around like you might’ve done if you were still seventeen. But no, you weren’t seventeen, you were a twenty-something independent that went out and did things and met people and kissed them if you wanted, maybe even take them home to your one-bedroom that would be otherwise empty without Steve plastered to your sofa, a hand stuffed into the popcorn you kept around because he once said he didn’t entirely hate it.
And that’s what you had done, convinced Nancy and Robin to leave the haze of their never-ending honeymoon phase to take you dancing. The drinks hadn’t stopped coming. Every time you gulped down a shot, another would be shoved into your hand before you’d had time to comprehend the reality of what you were going to do. To sleep with a stranger in the same space you’d watched Rocky with Steve only days earlier. You’d called and asked and begged him to come over, to join you, Nancy and Robin, but he’d bit at you in that way he sometimes did. The harsh edges of his teenage-self making itself known in ways you’d have liked to forget.
“Stop it, babes. I know what you’re doing,” Robin scolded, frowning at the dip between your brows and the lost look in your eyes. You forced a smile then, and she scoffed at the minimal effort you put into hiding your feelings, always having excelled at letting them take over your features even when you didn’t mean them to. Of course, every knew, everyone could see it in the way you trailed after him, like a lost puppy begging for an ounce of attention. Steve was cruel with the crumbs he handed you, but he didn’t know any better.
Everyone knew and everyone could see but Steve had always stood out, the most handsome, the most fit, the most clueless. And maybe that’s why you were perfect for each other because you hadn’t known either, had you.
“Come on, up you get!” Robin urged, pulling you from your chair with Nancy already clinging to her side, shuffling the three of you with what little sobriety she had left in her to the dance floor, pulsing lights and thrumming bodies none-the-wiser to the way you heart was cracking open.
So, you jumped and danced and bounced to the beat in ways you didn’t know you were capable of. Free and without regret and it wasn’t until someone was staring at you from across the room, watching your every moment with a fascination you’d never been subject to, that you stopped, pressing past Nancy and Robin with a tip of your head that assured them you’d be back.
He, whoever he was, surged into action, coming behind you at the bar where you were busy asking for a glass of water. You turned and smiled, stomach dipping, because he was attractive and strong, and he had these kind eyes and soft lips that looked like they’d be otherworldly against your skin. He introduced himself but the music obscured his words, so you nodded and pretended and wondered why you were dreading this conversation when it had only just begun.
He pulled you into a somewhat quieter corner after you’d gestured it was alright, and really, he seemed as surprised as you were when you all but pounced, mouth meeting his, open and desperate. He hadn’t complained, had probably seen it coming in the quiet desperation of your eyes. Of course, he didn’t know it was because of the way you wished it was someone else kissing you into the wall and not some all-consuming lust you were fueled by.
The next thing you knew you were huddled into the backseat of a cab, then stumbling across the gravel to your front door.
And that’s when you saw him. Sat on the bottom step of your apartment’s front door, gaze focused on the way whatever-his-name-was smirked into your neck, having probably thought you had stopped for a smooch and not because the man you had loved, unrequited, for close to a decade was staring at you like you’d stabbed him right in the chest, and twisted.
“Steve?” you whispered, loud enough to prompt Harrington off the step and marching across the short distance to you. “What are you—” but you never had a chance to ask him before he was swinging a left hook right into the guy’s jaw.
“Steve!” and you were shouting now, pushed to side as the stranger retaliated out of instinct, socking him in the nose. Steve looked like he was grinning, blood dripping into his mouth, like he was enjoying the feel of getting the shit beat out of him. “Stop it! Steve! I said—” you yanked him back, shoving him behind you as you rushed forward to-- fuck. You still don’t know his name.
“I��m sorry— Jesus Christ—” you swore when you noticed how his eye was already bruising as he shook you off. “I don’t know why he did that. I—I’m—"
His words were bitter when he responded, shooting daggers at the looming figure you were keenly aware was still behind you before meeting your pleading eyes. “It’s fine. It’s fine,” he assured you, squeezing your hip as he moved past you to leave. “You should talk to your boyfriend, you know, before you bring anyone else over.”
“I’m not—He’s not—” but he was gone, and you were still reeling from what had just happened, what Steve had just done. You turned, anger coursing through you so violently your hands were shaking. “Fucking hell—Steve! What the fuck are you doing here? And what the fuck was that?!”
“Were you going to fuck him?” he asked plainly, bluntly, shirt pulled to his face as he tried to stop the bleeding. There was still that wild look in his eyes, a flush to his skin, like he too was dazed and confused.
“What—I--- how is that any of your fucking business?” you answered back, shoving a finger against his chest. He was immovable though, only grabbed at your hand and held it until your palm was flat against the front of him. You could feel, now, the reckless thrum of his heartbeat, and you asked yourself how you’d gotten here in the first place, pushed up against a bloodied and bruised Steve Harrington.
“Just tell me. If I hadn’t been sat here, would you have fucked him?”
And you didn’t completely understand it, didn’t know what answer he was looking for—the one that was acquiesce him enough to explain himself or at the very least go inside and forget about all this ever happening—so instead you answered honestly. “Yes,” but your voice cracked at the end, so you snatched your hand back, cradling it to yourself like an injured bird you hoped to keep cocooned in your warm. You cleared your throat and tried again. “Yeah, I would have slept with him. And if it hadn’t been him, I would have found someone else.”
He nodded, looking as if he were pained but you were certain, now, it wasn’t because of the punch he’d taken to the face. “And if I had answered your call, met you there, got drunk and kissed you, would you have fucked me, too?”
You reeled at his words, feeling entirely as though you were the one in the midst of a fight. “Where is this coming from, Steve? Why are you saying these things to me?” you begged, pleaded, tired of whatever back-and-forth the two of you had gotten into the habit of.
“Look—” and he was determined now, steely gaze pinning you to the ground. His bruised knuckles brushed through his hair, scattering the strands across his forehead so that your fingers tingled with the urge to brush them out of his eyes like you’d always done. “—I should’ve said this ages ago. I just—I never could because it was never the right time, and I didn’t really see you in that way, not when I knew you did—” and really you wanted to stop him there, let the Earth swallow you whole and spit your bones out to be buried far from here. “I knew you had this—this thing for me but I ignored it but then we became friends and we—I mean, we watch movies, and we cuddle on the couch and sometimes I think I’d like to do that with you all the time and—
“Steve, please,” you whispered through the tears flooding past your irises, looking anywhere but at him, cheeks flushed with humiliation. He’d always had this tight grip around your heart and maybe he didn’t know that with every word he spoke that grip tightened, and tightened, and you were sure your heart was going to burst if he didn’t shut up right then.
“Just listen—I want to do those things with you always, sweetheart, I really do. I could’ve—I mean, I should’ve communicated my feelings earlier, I know I should have, but I didn’t want to lie to you. Not when you mean so much to me and I couldn’t give you what you wanted.” He looked at you then, expectantly, reaching forward to pull you into his embrace but you stumbled back, wanting out of the hold he had on you in more ways than one.
“Am I meant to thank you for looking at me differently now?” you bit out, exhaustion coating your syllables like rust on a nail.
His face fell as he stuttered over his own words. “I mean—no, sweetheart, no, of course not, I just thought—”
“You thought because I’m pathetic—because I’ve always been fucking pathetic to you—stumbling after you since high school that I’d just be, what, waiting for you? That I’d welcome your change of heart with open arms and gratitude?” you scoffed, gaze narrowed as you watched that wall of his build itself back up. Your ego was bruised and you were too stubborn to admit it, because you thought he had been clueless, and that thought had kept you safe all these years as you curled into his side every weekend.
“I don’t think that. I’ve never thought that” he cautioned, temper rising. If Steve Harrington was anything it was beautiful, and if he wasn’t beautiful, he was angry, stubborn, a pot ready to boil over.  
“Come on, Steve. You said it yourself: I’ve had a thing for you since freshmen year. I followed you after we graduated, and I’ve followed you again, here, now. It took me years—fucking years—to get over it, to accept that I’d never be more than a friend, if that, and now, after you’ve been dodging me for days, you turn around and confess some sort of miracle feelings for me?” You were panting, out of breath from the way the words spilled out of you, thoughts you shouldn’t have kept to yourself all this time.
“Well what should I have done!” he roared, and a few curious lights blinked on from the building behind him. “Should I have not befriended you when you turned up to the same college? Should I have, instead, fucked you ten years ago when it would have meant nothing to me?” And you flinched at his words.
“You should have let me be, Steve,” you sighed, defeated. Because he was right, but you hated him for prodding at wounds you were still trying to heal.  “You should have kept it to yourself and let me be.” But really what you wanted to say was you’ve been lying to Robin and Nancy because you weren’t over him. You loved him; you’d always love him, but you were afraid, if you told him the truth, that he’d slowly fade from your life until he wasn’t a part of it anymore.
He nodded, face slipping into that mask of his you’d dreaded seeing. “Right. Got it.”
He pushed past you, and you wanted to thank him for the slight brush of his skin against yours, but you kept quiet, like you always had.
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as always, please comment and reblog if you enjoyed <3
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gretavangroupie · 5 months ago
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Imber
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Pairing: Jake Kiszka x Reader
Word Count: 21.5k
Warnings: Camping Jake, Cursing, Alcohol, Arguing, Pining, Angst, Severe Weather, Kissing, Graphic Sexual Content, Unprotected Sex, Fluff.
A/N: I had a thought and couldn't let it go. Special thanks to @gretavanmoon and @builtbybrokenbells for always supporting me and listening to my rambling voice memos. Love you both.
You watch as the familiar white Jeep pulls into your driveway, a cloud of dust filling the air as the car shifts into park. It’s only seconds before Clara is bounding out of the passenger door, running up to meet you on your porch.
“Clara…” you say, a suspicious look on your face.
“Josh said he wanted to tag along since he’s home…I couldn’t say no! Don’t be mad!” she whines nervously, knowing good and well this was supposed to be a girls weekend. 
You squint your eyes at her and let out a faux huff of annoyance, “It’s fine,” you say, sending her a playful smile.
“Are you sure?” she asks, bending down to help you grab your camping supplies. 
“Of course, Clara. I was just kidding around. You know I love Josh, and I know you hardly ever get to do stuff like this together. In fact, if you two want to just go, I can stay–”
“No way. You’re absolutely coming! Don’t start!” she shouts, slinging your duffle bag over her shoulder. “Let’s get you loaded up and on the road.”
The two of you spend the next few minutes organizing your things into the trunk, tetrising a few items until the trunk door would shut. You climb into the backseat, taking up residence next to the cooler packed with food for the weekend. 
“Hi Y/N! Thanks for letting me crash your camping trip!” Josh says, turning around in the driver's seat to flash you a smile. 
“Of course! I mean, if I knew that you were going to be home we could have planned like, a whole thing. It’s really no big deal. The more the merrier!” you answer, feeling Clara’s hand reach back to squeeze yours in thanks.
“Just a little break, only three weeks or so then we are back to it. Germany next,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows at you in the rearview mirror. 
You listen to him and Clara talk about the next leg of his tour, seeing the city start to taper off outside the car window. The trees are growing thick and the signs of humanity are next to none. 
“So where exactly are we going on this camping adventure, Clara?” you laugh, never really discussing a location in your earlier planning. 
“We’re going out to Leiper’s Fork, have you ever been there?” Josh answers.
“No, but I’ve heard of it!”
“Yeah, it’s a super cool little spot. Super secluded and gorgeous this time of year. Been out here a few times,” he says, letting his hand move to rest on Clara’s thigh. 
“How did you even find this? I feel like we are in the middle of nowhere!” you laugh, letting your eyes focus on the multicolored trees out the window. 
“Oh this is Jake’s spot. He’s always out here. Likes to come out here to write,” he pauses, turning to look at Clara. You can sense the nervous energy in his voice,  “He’s um, he’s actually going to be joining us.”
“Oh?” 
You feel a rush of panic wash over you. To say that your relationship with Jake was a bit rocky would be an understatement. You weren’t sure if there was ever really one thing that started it, one thing that made him dislike you so much, it just kind of evolved into what it is. You always seemed to find yourself in the same room as him, at the same parties with him, and attending the same shows, thanks to Josh and Clara. Though, neither of you ever bothered to speak to each other, let alone acknowledge the other's existence. It turned into an unspoken feud, filled with harsh whispers and judgemental glances, letting Josh and Clara be the buffer between the two of you. 
The thought of him joining you this weekend had you wishing you never agreed to the trip in the first place, and you know that they waited until you were this far out of town to break the news to you. 
“It will be fine babe, don’t worry. He will keep to himself like usual,” Clara says, sending you a guilty look. 
“Clara…”
“She’s right. He is different when we come out here. He might even be nice, who knows,” Josh laughs. It eases your anxiety just enough and you find yourself agreeing to this set up.
“Alright, it’s fine. I mean, it’s only two days anyway.”
The three of you spend most of the afternoon setting up your tents, wrestling the skinny fiberglass poles through the brightly colored fabric in fits of laughter. You took up shop beneath an old Oak tree, hoping it would provide a bit of shelter from the sun and the wind. Clara and Josh set up their tent just across from you, closer to the car and the fire pit. 
You organized your things in your tent, listening as Josh got chairs set up around the fire pit. He and Clara pulled the cooler from the car, tossing you a beer and as the sun started to dip in the sky, you talked about dinner and made plans for tomorrow's adventures. 
It was nearly sunset before you heard the rumble of tires as Jake’s Jeep pulled up to the campsite. You all snap your heads in his direction, seeing him jump out of the drivers side with a smirk on his lips. 
“Glad you could join us,” Josh teases. 
“Can’t rush these things,” he counters, nodding his head to Clara as a hello. His eyes flick over you and you watch as the expression on his face changes. His jaw tightens and his lips flatten into a thin line. A grumble of something leaves his lips in a whisper, and you don’t even have to hear it to know what he said wasn't pleasant. 
You look away quickly, turning your attention back to the vegetables you were cutting up for dinner. He turns back towards his car, gathering his things from the trunk as he continues to gripe incoherently. 
You focus on Josh and Clara, who are working on their own dinners, trying to keep the conversation flowing and ease the obvious tension. 
Jake tosses his things to the ground, preparing to set up his tent next to yours. You don’t dare tell him that it’s yours, and he doesn't dare ask. You continue to fill the tin foil with vegetables and meat, letting them marinate just long enough to get the fire started. 
“Jake, let’s go,” Josh says, motioning him over towards him.
“Go where,” he asks. 
“Need to gather firewood and I’m not making Clara carry it,” he says. Jake nods and gets up, jogging over to meet him. The two of them disappear into the thick woods, leaving you and Clara by yourselves at the campsite.
“This is going just great, wouldn’t you say?” you taunt, elbowing Clara from your camp chair. Her gaze is completely fixed on her phone, her eyes frantically flicking around the screen. 
“Hello? Earth to Clara?” you continue, still unable to break her away from her phone. 
She gets up and walks around, holding her phone to the sky in hopes of strengthening her signal.
“What's up, is everything okay?” you shout, starting to feel a little nervous. 
“Yeah, um, it’s fine. I think? I don’t know. I just got a weird text from my sister, and now I don’t have any service,” she says, biting at her bottom lip. 
“You can use mine if you want, I don’t know if my service is any better though. We are kinda in the middle of nowhere.”
“It’s– It’s fine. I think,” she says, sitting back down in her chair next to you. 
“Anyway, what were you saying? Sorry, I suck,” she says, turning to look at you apologetically.
Just as you go to speak you hear the crunching of leaves and sticks, and see the shadowy figure of the two men returning with an arm full of firewood. 
“Well, nothing now,” you laugh, motioning to Josh and Jake. 
“Oh, okay, later?” she asks, hoping you will fill her in. 
“Yes, later,” you mumble.
Josh and Jake step up, tossing the wood into a pile next to the fire pit. “That should be enough for two days,” Josh says, dusting his hands off on his jeans. 
Jake’s eyes meet yours, only for a second before storming off to his car. You shake it off and try to focus on Josh as he builds the fire in front of you, using an obnoxious amount of lighter fluid in the process. 
“Clara he is going to light us all on–”
Her phone ringing interrupts you, grabbing her attention as she rushes to answer it. She stands up and walks away towards the car, and you watch as her demeanor shifts into panic. Your eyes meet Josh’s, both of you feeling uneasy about whatever is happening on that phone call. She rushes back over to you, her face fear stricken and her hands visibly shaking. 
“Josh, we have to go! We have to go right now!” she shouts, frantically rushing around and grabbing things from inside their tent.
“What? Clara, what's going on?!” he asks, trying to calm her down. 
“Ashton! She’s going into labor! She’s on her way to the hospital right now! She wasn’t due until next week! I don’t know, I don't know! But we have to go right now!” she says, pulling out of his grip and continuing to grab her things and throw them in the car. 
“Oh shit! Okay, yes, yes we can go, um…” he pauses, looking over towards Jake at his tent and you sitting in the chair in front of him, “Fuck, um…Y/N, do you uh, want to come with us, or–”
“Shit, Y/N, I’m so sorry! I had no idea or I wouldn’t have– fuck, you should just… stay, enjoy the campsite and just relax. I’m so sorry I promise I will make this up to you!” Clara cries, her nervous energy transferring to you. 
It’s mere seconds before her and Josh are jumping into his car and pulling out of the campsite, abandoning their tent, their dinner and the rest of their belongings. 
Fuck.
You stand up from your chair, processing what exactly happened as you stare at the roaring fire. 
“Where uh, where did they go?” Jake asks, appearing from his tent as he hears the car peeling out of the campsite. 
You turn to look at him, shocked that he even spoke to you, while also realizing that now it’s just the two of you. Alone.
“They– Clara’s sister is having her baby. Early. They just…left– I–”
“Left?” he asks, “Like for good?”
“I…think so…” you answer, watching as he drags his hand across his face. The hem of his flannel lifts in the process revealing the tiniest peek at his tanned torso, so you quickly divert your eyes before he notices your staring. 
“Of course,” he gripes, kicking at the pile of firewood. He mutters something under his breath and you feel a wave of embarrassment at the thought of him dreading being around you this much. 
He huffs out a breath and turns to you, “Well, do you want to stay here or–”
“I mean, do you want to stay?” you question, shrugging your shoulders noncommittally. 
“I have no issue with staying. I know you were only here for them, so if you want to leave I promise it’s not going to hurt my feelings. I’m used to being out here alone anyway,” he says, his tone a little clipped. “Prefer it.”
“Are you going to be mad if I do want to stay?” you say, crossing your arms over your chest. You let your eyes meet his for a few seconds, both of you looking at each other as he thinks of his answer.
Again he rubs his hand over his face, shaking his head, “No, no I won’t be fucking mad– I just– Do you want to fucking stay, yes or no.”
“Yes.”
“Okay. Okay. Then we’ll stay,” he says, lowering the sound of his voice. His eyes flick around your face for a few seconds before turning to look at the fire. You can tell he is agitated, but when is he not?
“Jesus, he always uses too much fluid,” he gripes, turning his attention to the flames. “Pyromaniac.”
“Well, I guess we can throw these on?” you say, picking up the tin foil packets. 
“Yeah yeah, um, just set ‘em there,” he says, looking up to you from his crouched position next to the fire pit.
“Do you…want a drink or something?” you ask, feeling the awkwardness between you growing quickly. You can feel the hostility pouring off of him, and getting a drink seems to be you only escape plan.
“What’s in there?” he asks, looking over towards the cooler. 
“Beer?” you pause, “I don’t know, Josh packed it.”
“Whatever’s in there is fine,” he says, tossing the foil packets onto the flames.
You make your way to the cooler, grabbing two icy cans and returning to your chair to see Jake sitting in the one on the opposite side of the fire pit. You hand the can to him, seeing a side smile pull across his lips as he nods his head in thanks. 
“Got something stronger in the car if you want it,” he smirks, popping the tab on his can.
The small sliver of a smile nearly takes your breath away. “Oh, um, no this is good. Thank you though.”
It’s quiet between the two of you, both of you sipping at your beers as you watch the fire in front of you. You want to say something to him, start a conversation, maybe even chip away at his tough exterior, but you know that comes with risks. Risks you aren't willing to take while stranded in the woods for the next two days. 
It’s him though, that strikes up a conversation, but it’s not to make small talk, it’s to get answers. 
“Why do you even want to stay if Clara left?” he asks, bringing his can to his lips. 
You take a second to think about it, “Well, because I bought all this camping stuff, mostly. I’ve been looking forward to this little trip. I like being in nature, and I don’t get to do it often enough. Going in the woods alone as a woman isn’t exactly the safest either. So yeah, it sucks they had to leave but I’d rather be here than back at my place staring at my camping supplies sitting at my front door.”
“No other reason?” he asks, lowering his voice a little as he pokes at the foil packs with a stick.
You shake your head slowly, “Not that I can think of, no.”
He scoffs and flips the packets over before sitting back in his chair. You can feel him judging you, and the silence as he snickers at you confirms it. 
“Don’t be like that, Jake. You wanted to stay, too.”
“Yeah, but I come out here all the time. This is my damn spot,” he snaps.
“Well excuse me for intruding! I can call a fucking cab but I don’t think they will find me out here!”
“Jesus, relax,” he groans, “You know what? That's your problem. You’re too…you’re too uptight.”
“I’m uptight?!” you gasp, “What about you?! Mister, brooding misunderstood rockstar, can't stand to be in the same room as a person that doesn't fall at his feet and sing his praises,” you bark. 
“No, see, that's where you’re wrong. I’m not brooding or misunderstood. The people that I want to know me, know me just fine. I just don't put my feelings on display for everyone I meet. I have a certain way I like to live my life. And if that comes across as brooding and misunderstood, then so be it.”
“You know, you’re insufferable sometimes…” you grit.
“Well thank you for your input. I’ll be sure to put that in my diary later,” he snickers. 
“Do you have any respect for anyone?” you shout from across the fire.
“Of course I do. Those who earn it,” he says, raising his eyebrows. 
“You’re so–” you pause, grunting in frustration when you struggle to find the words.
“Sorry I have standards, sweetheart,” he says, taking another long pull of his beer. 
“Standards? What is that supposed to mean?” you shout, feeling yourself getting a little worked up. 
He glances up at you over the fire, “I don't let just anyone come into my life and get all up close and personal. You have to earn that. Which means my standards are a little higher than most.”
You cut your eyes at him, “Why are you like this? All cold and cryptic…I don’t even know what I did to make you dislike me this much.”
His eyes are dark and unyielding, his lips turning into a smile as he laughs, “I never said I dislike you. You just don't like how I present myself because it goes against what you’re used to. You're used to easy going guys, who let you do anything you want because you’re pretty. Not guys who are a little closed off and reserved. You don't want a little bit of a challenge.”
“Who said I even want you at all?” you bite back.
“You didn’t need to say it, sweetheart. You’re easy to read,” he says, sending you a smug grin. 
“Well, find a different book.”
“You’re also a smartass,” he says, leaning forward to pull the foil packets from the fire with a stick. He carefully opens up the hot foil, and checks them to make sure they are cooked through. His eyes flick up to yours, “Hungry?”
“Yeah, I am,” you say begrudgingly, leaning forward to reach for the foil wrapped food. You unroll the foil and reach for the plastic forks, offering one to Jake. He takes it with the raise of his brow, casually picking at the food in the silver wrap. 
“Explains a few things,” he mutters with a smirk. 
“Is this how this is going to be? Are you just going to dig at me all weekend until we go our separate ways?” you ask, starting to feel a little fed up.
“You tell me. Is that what you want?” he asks, biting a carrot from his fork. 
“No, I want us to just get along the best we can. I want this to be at least a little enjoyable.”
He looks at you for a moment and seems to soften a bit. “Fine,” he says, “So what would you like to talk about then, sweetheart?"
You roll your eyes at the pet name you’ve adopted, “I don't know, what do you enjoy talking about? Pretend it's not me. Tell me about life on tour or something.”
He nods and picks at his food, seemingly thinking for a minute before he speaks. “Well,” he begins, “The tour has been good, a few bumps along the way. We hit some bad weather in Huntsville that delayed one of our shows for a night, but other than that it was a good run. I think everyone is holding up fine.”
“What about you, though. Are you holding up fine?” you ask. 
He seems taken aback by the question. He looks at you with a surprised expression, almost as if it’s the first time someone has asked him about himself. He looks down at his food and is quiet for a moment before mumbling, “Yeah…I’m fine. Why?”
“I don't know, you just seem...agitated with everything lately. Every time I see you, you just seem quiet.”
He looks up at you again, holding eye-contact for a minute. He is tempted to deny it, to tell you everything is fine, but he doesn’t. Maybe there’s a part of him that wants to be honest with you. The other part terrified of letting you see through the walls he has worked so hard to build up.
“That’s just how I am,” he says quietly. He glances up at you and then back at the fire again, “That’s how I present myself. And it’s always been that way. It’s how people expect me to be most of the time and I don’t blame them. Most of my music is written about heartache and struggle whether personal or not. It’s everything I am. But I’m fine, sweetheart. I’m always fine.”
You shrug your shoulders, not wanting to pry anymore, feeling satisfied with the little bit he’s allowed you,. “Okay.”
The two of you eat in silence for a few more minutes, the wind starting to pick up, as the leaves rustle behind you. Jake seems to have softened a bit since your earlier banter, and you wonder if he is feeling a little guilty for his hand in the taunting. 
He looks at you again with a raised eyebrow, “What about you, then? Are you fine?”
He’s asking about you? 
“I mean, yeah. I think I'm fine. There are some things I wish were different, but that's life,” you offer, not wanting to delve too far into things. Not that he would care anyway. 
He seems a little taken aback with your response. Not that it surprised him that you have personal problems, but he wasn’t expecting you to be honest with him. Almost anyone else would have painted a perfect picture and made themselves appear significantly better than they actually were. There was a moment between you two when the only sound was the crackling of the fire and the chirping of Cicadas before he quietly spoke again.
“What do you wish were different?”
“Ahh, it’s nothing really. Just sometimes I wonder if I am where I am supposed to be. You know, the normal stuff,” you say, offering him a smile.  
He looks at you for a beat and nods slowly, seeming to take that in. “I don’t think anyone truly knows if they’re where they’re meant to be. One of the mysteries of life, I suppose.”
“What?” you nod, encouraging him to continue. “What were you going to say? You look like you wanted to ask something.” 
He suddenly looks uncomfortable, looking back into the fire and away from you. 
“It’s nothing.” He shakes his head as if dismissing whatever he was just thinking and stands up. He walks towards the treeline with an unreadable expression on his face, and you wonder what he could possibly be thinking. The wind sends a shiver through you, and you decide to grab the s'mores ingredients from the cooler before he comes back. If he comes back. 
He walks away, disappearing into the trees as he goes to relieve himself. He stands there for a moment, his breath coming out in visible puffs in the cool night air. He runs a hand through his hair, swearing under his breath as he replays your conversation. He hates that you can break him down so easily, that you seem to understand him better than he understands himself, and worse that you even care enough to ask. 
He zips up and turns to head back towards the tent, feeling frustrated and conflicted. He knows he's being unfair to you, knows that he's acting cold and distant for no good reason. But he can't help it. It’s all he can do. He doesn't want to get close to people, doesn't want to let them in. Especially not you. 
You work quickly trying to place the marshmallows on sticks, finding it to be a lot harder than you thought. With a little elbow grease and a dream you shoved the sticky blobs on the ends of the sticks, dangling them gingerly over the open flames. 
With both hands occupied it's hard to shield your arms from the cool wind that is dancing through your campsite. A chill rises to your skin despite the warmth of the fire. You quickly forget about it though as you see Jake reappearing through the treeline. He walks up with his hands in his pockets, his eyes studying you as you roast the two marshmallows. 
“What are you up to now?” he asks, raising a brow. 
“I mean…Roasting marshmallows, what do you mean?” you ask, confused as to why he was confused. 
His eyes roam over you and a small smirk appears at the corner of his mouth. He leans a little bit closer to study what you’re doing, laughing under his breath.
“You’re going to burn them, sweetheart.”
“No I’m not. I know what I’m doing, thank you,” you quip, rotating the sticks. 
He laughs and shakes his head, “If you’re not careful, you’ll end up with a mess of black, gooey, sugar.”
He moves a little closer behind you, until his chest is mere inches away from your back. His voice drops to a teasing whisper against your ear. “But, by all means, continue.”
If the goosebumps weren’t already taking up residency on your body, they would be now. He takes the chair next to you this time, instead of his previous one across from you. You don’t question it, and he doesn’t mention it, so you leave it at that. 
You watch as the marshmallows start to puff up, knowing they are done and ready to be put on the graham cracker, but that's when you realize you only have two hands, and this is in fact, about to go south quickly.
“Here, hand one to me,” he says, grabbing the stick from your hand. “Put that one together, and then do this one.”
You work quickly to assemble the marshmallow, chocolate and graham cracker, your fingers growing into a sticky, sugary mess as it starts to deflate. It’s melting the chocolate perfectly, and you think you may have just made the perfect s’more. The wind starts to whip a little harder, blowing your hair around your face just a little too much. Jake hands you the stick back, letting you assemble the other s’more, trying to push your hair out of your face with your wrist. 
From his spot next to you, you can feel his eyes on you. Watching you struggle, giggling a little under his breath as you fight through the mess of hair in your eyes. 
You place the chocolate on the cracker before trying to position the marshmallow on top, a huff of frustration falling from your lips as you push your hair back with the side of your arm. “Fuck,” you growl. 
You hear him laugh again, but this time it's accompanied with him standing up from his seat. You turn your head and watch as he pulls a black hair tie from his finger. His fingers brush against your neck for a moment, gathering your hair into his fist and pulling it up into a quick ponytail. It is an unexpectedly sweet and careful gesture on his part, taking you completely by surprise. 
He steps back and looks over you, now with your hair out of the way. “There,” he says, taking his seat once more.
“Th–thank you,” you squeak out, still reeling over the feeling of his hands on your skin. 
There is a beat of silence between you where he just looks at you. His eyes drift from your face down to your fingers and the gooey mess you had created from assembling the s’mores. 
He suddenly snickers,“You’re a mess, sweetheart.”
You shrug your shoulders and offer him the perfect s’more, reaching for your own and sinking your teeth into the melty goodness. You were right, it was perfect. Probably the best you’d ever made. Screw him for saying you were going to burn it. 
You turn to look at him, ready to see his reaction to the perfectly made treat. He bites into it, staring at the fire as he chews, swallowing down his first bite before he turns to you. 
“You know, I kind of hate these,” he smirks. 
“What?” you ask, taking another bite. 
“I never have liked them. My whole life, really.”
“Then why– Why are you eating it? You didn’t have to eat it,” you say, suddenly feeling guilty. 
“I dunno. I want to. I guess ‘cause you made it for me.”
You feel your heart drop into your stomach, watching him intentionally take another bite as he settles back in his camp chair. There is a new tension floating in the air now, it's less uncomfortable and more heavy with things unsaid. 
He turns to look at you again, his face glowing in the orange fire light, “It actually isn’t terrible. I will admit.”
“So what you’re saying is that you love my cooking?” you tease.
He laughs, as he swallows his last bite, “Well, I didn’t say that. The fact that you call this cooking is questionable.” His tone is teasing, and you watch as he licks a dribble of chocolate from his thumb. It causes more of a reaction within you than you ever anticipated, and again you thank the wind for causing the goosebumps. 
“I think I have some paper towels  in the car, I’ll be right back.” he says, standing and walking over to his car. You can hear him digging around in his trunk as you stare off at the trees in the distance, trying to make any sense of the feelings rushing through your body right now. Why is he sort of sweet? Why is he sort of really sexy when he’s not being an asshole?
A flash in the trees catches your eye, snapping you from your thoughts and raising your blood pressure. You stare intently, watching for it again, hearing Jake approaching from your left. You see the flash again, accompanied by two others, and a smile crosses your face. 
Jake steps up behind you, tossing a thick flannel in your lap as he takes his spot next to you, offering you a handful of wet wipes to clean your sticky fingers. You glance down at the shirt laying across your legs and turn to him in surprise.
“Noticed you were cold, that's all.”
You clean your hands the best you can before sliding the thick flannel shirt over your arms, letting the warmth and the smell envelop your senses. This was not helping with the thoughts you were having a few minutes ago. You turn your sights back to the trees, watching the little orbs buzz around overhead.
“Fireflies…” you whisper, watching a few zaps of yellow buzz around in the old Oak trees.
He hums as he sees them light up, “They are in all of the trees out here. One of my favorite things,” he admits.
“Jake?”
He turns to look at you, nodding for you to continue. 
“Why do you come out here alone all the time?” you ask, genuinely curious. 
His expression darkens slightly as he hears the question, and he is quiet for a moment before answering. “It’s just peaceful I guess,” He shrugs and looks out into the darkness of the trees instead of you. “Not everyone is cut out to be around people all the time.”
“You don’t ever get lonely?”
A beat of silence passes and he glances back at you. This time, his usual smirk has disappeared and is replaced by a more serious look. He doesn’t answer the question, but there is a look in his eyes that makes you think maybe he is more lonely than he wants to let on.
“I’m comfortable with my own company,” he says quietly. The fire is still smoldering in front of the two of you, the flames gone now, leaving a pile of glowing embers snapping and popping as they work to extinguish themselves. 
You pull the sleeves of his flannel over your hands, catching his attention and pulling a tiny smirk to the corners of his lips. He swallows hard, his Adam's apple bobbing as he tries to focus on the fireflies again. It feels nice sitting with him like this. Just talking, no witty remarks or snappy comebacks. Just two people, talking. 
“Don’t you ever wish you had someone to share this with, though? Your spot?” you ask, giving him a playful grin.
He watches you for a moment, considering the question. There is a part of him that wants to be defensive and cold, shutting you out and telling you he doesn’t want that. But the look in your eyes and the softness of your tone tells him he can’t lie to you about this. He breaks eye contact momentarily, his gaze falling downward to his hands in his lap.
“Sometimes…” he mumbles under his breath. 
You aren’t sure why, but that goes straight to your heart. Sure he said he was fine earlier, but now you’re starting to see that maybe that isn’t completely true. It’s quiet for a moment, and you spend each second gathering up the courage to continue the conversation.
He glances at you again, this time having a look on his face that says he wishes he hadn’t confessed that to you. He suddenly becomes much more uncomfortable, trying to cover it up by acting nonchalant, adjusting his position in his chair and fidgeting with the fire. He clears his throat and looks to you again, “It’s late. We should get some sleep.”
It catches you off guard. Him not only abruptly ending the conversation, but the rest of the evening. You know he is right, you probably should go to sleep, but part of you feels like the conversation is unfinished, and you think he knows that, too. 
“Oh, um, okay. Yeah, you’re probably right.” you say, standing from your chair with a stretch. You can feel his eyes on you, burning holes into your skin. “Is the fire going to be okay?”
He laughs a little, nodding his head, “Yeah, yeah. Just embers now. It will smolder out in an hour or two,” he says. 
You nod your head and pull your flannel covered arms across your chest tightly. You start to make your way over to your tent, your mind flooded with the vision of him just moments ago, soft and glowing in the firelight. You look back at him, still standing at the fire, watching you walk to your tent. He nods with a smirk and starts walking toward his own tent. Before going in, he looks back at you, his eyes meeting yours.
“Night.”
“Night, Jake,” you answer, reaching for the zipper. He nods and watches as you step inside, waiting until you’re safely inside before he lets out a deep sigh.
He can’t quite put his finger on why he suddenly feels so off-kilter. You’ve shaken him in a way no other has been able to. There was something about that conversation earlier, you asking what he wanted. How he was doing.  How he feels. The way your features softened as you listened to him and made him want to tell you the truth. He didn’t like how it made him feel, like every falsity he had built up about you in his mind was exactly that. He had spent so long pushing you away and talking you down to himself that now, here, where he can’t escape you, he is faced with the fact that you’re exactly the girl he thought you were, and everything he has always known deep down is true.. 
Inside your tent, you rummage around in your duffle bag looking for something to sleep in. As you pull an old t-shirt from the bag you pull his flannel from your body, setting it aside while you change. You don’t know why, but you find yourself reaching for it again and layering it over your shirt. You pull it to your nose to breathe it in now that you’re alone in the confines of your tent. It smells of smoke and tobacco, a sweet earthy undertone pulling you into its spell as your eyes flutter closed.
You can hear him zipping his tent, the faint glow of his lantern casting a shadow of his figure against the tent fabric. You hear the buckle of his belt as he pulls it from the loops on his jeans, and you do your best to look away. But with the smell of his cologne invading your senses, you claim temporary insanity and watch as his shadow pulls his shirt over his head and slides out of his jeans. You swallow heavily as you watch his shadow settle down into his sleeping bag and turn off the lantern.
You do the same, turning off your headlamp and getting inside your sleeping bag, doing your best to get comfortable. Even though the air is warm, the ground is cold and you shiver slightly.  It’s difficult to get comfortable in the new environment and you find yourself rolling over and shifting around a lot, almost matching the state of your brain. Eventually, the sound of the cicadas lure you to sleep, and as your eyes shut it's a soft, fireside Jake that is on your mind. 
The birds chirping in the tree above you wakes you. Your eyes crack open and you immediately notice the cool chill in the air. You sit up and yawn, stretching out your limbs and buttoning the buttons on the flannel for a little extra warmth. As you step outside of your tent a cool fog envelops you, causing you to shiver. You see a small fire has been built in the fire pit already, so you gather that Jake is already awake.
You make your way to your camp chair, noticing it has been wiped of the dew already, and is ready for you to occupy it. Your eyes search the foggy landscape for any sight of him, finding him standing at the tailgate of his Jeep fiddling with something. He catches sight of you, and nods, motioning that he will be over soon. 
Minutes later he is approaching with two camp mugs filled with what you can only assume is coffee. The steam is swirling from the tops of the mugs blending in with the fog surrounding you. 
“Morning,” he says, offering you the blue speckled mug. 
“Morning,” you smile, accepting it from his hand. “You have all the accessories, don’t you?”
He smiles, and nods gently, “I’m very serious when I commit to things.”
“Oh, is that right?”
“It is.” His gaze travels over you for a moment. He can’t help but appreciate just how good you look in the morning. The messy hair and the sleepy expression, combined with his flannel, you’re practically driving him insane.
“Do you think we will be able to see the sunrise through the fog?” you ask, sipping at the black coffee.
He squints thoughtfully out into the fog, taking in the thickness of it. He can’t see anything through the haze and honestly doubts you will be able to see much of anything.
“Hard to say,” he shrugs. “Depends on how long it hangs on.”
You nod in understanding, returning to the quiet morning, listening to the chirping of the birds in the distance. “You know it is really beautiful out here, I see why you come out here.”
He smiles a little, appreciating your change of attitude from last night.
“I thought you’d like it,” he said with a hint of a smirk. He glances back out into the fog where everything is hazy and unclear. “It’s nice and quiet here. No one around for miles, other than us of course. I like that best of all.”
“You know, I might even come back here one day,” you smile, feeling your chest grow warm at his last words. 
He suddenly looks surprised that you’re considering returning. He usually had a comeback for anything you said, but for this, he was quiet for a moment, considering your words.
He glances around at the surrounding area, the trees and shrubs all covered in the dense fog. He feels almost defensive about you seeing this place as beautiful. It was his place, his special place, and he wasn’t sure why he felt so weird that you were appreciating it. He falls silent for a moment as he watches you enjoy the surroundings, sipping the coffee he made for you as you sit in his flannel. The peaceful look on your face as you look out into the fog causes his chest to feel warm. He would never admit it, but he wants to bring you back here as often as you want to come.
He clears his throat and looks back at you. “Maybe we can take a walk before it clears up.”
You can feel the blush creeping up your chest, your cheeks burning at the thought that he might actually want to spend the day with you. 
“Yeah, I think I’d like that. Anything cool to see out here?”
He takes a moment to think, rubbing his fingers against his lips, “There’s a pretty decent hike to a creek not too far, we could go that way. Only if you’re not scared of a little wilderness along the way,” he smirked.
“I’m not scared,” you answer, raising a brow in challenge. 
“You bring a bathing suit?” he asks, tipping back the last of his coffee.
“Of course,” you laugh. 
“Good, I’ll meet you back out here in say, fifteen?” he says, standing from his chair.
You nod and both make your way back to your tents, changing into your bikini that you fully did not prepare to wear in front of a man, let alone Jake. You pull a pair of denim shorts and a cut off tee over top, grabbing your hiking boots and your backpack as you make your way back out to the camp chairs. 
Jake is still in his tent, so you use the time to lace up your boots and pack a few snacks into your bag. It’s not long before Jake is stepping out, in a pair of red swim trunks and a black button down, barely hanging on to his tan frame. It seems a strange ensemble for hiking, but he is unlike any other man you knew, and it kind of just fit.
He joins you at the chairs, putting on his own hiking boots. You feel his hand reach over to check the tautness of your shoestrings, grabbing your attention. 
He looks up at you from his bent over position, “Just making sure they are tight enough, don’t need you getting blisters before we even make it to the trail head,” he smiles. 
With your bag packed and your sunglasses perched on your nose, the two of you set off into the treeline, leaving your camp behind in search of adventure. You head down the winding trail that is lined with overgrowth on either side. You can tell that not many people walk this path, and you wonder how Jake even found it in the first place. The thick brush and branches scratch at your legs as you trudge on, but you welcome it. This is what you wanted, after all.
He walks just a step behind you, watching your feet as you walk along the trail. He can’t help but notice how your legs look in your denim shorts, and he does his best not to stare. Not that you would notice. 
You turn around to look at him, noticing him a few strides behind you, “You gonna keep up with me Kiszka?”
He scoffs playfully, a bit miffed at that comment, “I’ve walked this trail a hundred times, pretty sure I can handle it.”
He takes a few quick steps to catch up to you, walking next to you now rather than a few steps behind. His shoulder brushes against yours as he walks, catching you both by surprise. 
“Why am I leading the way anyway if you know where we are going?” you tease. 
He scoffs and rolls his eyes, “You’re not ‘leading the way’ sweetheart, I’m guiding you.”
You huff in annoyance, “Guiding me? I’m not a dog…”
He smirked, thinking about how you definitely weren’t as obedient as a dog. You were much harder to control and a hell of a lot more stubborn.
He suddenly snickered and said, “Never said you were, I just don’t trust you not to wander off.”
“And go where? You’re all I’ve got out here!” you giggle, the words leaving your lips before you consider the weight of them. 
He snickered again with amusement, though his heart skipped a beat when you said that. You were all he had as well. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his swim trunks as he walked next to you, avoiding any more of the shrubs that were trying to grab onto him.
“There’s plenty of places to get lost around here if you wander off the trail. That’s why I’m making sure you don’t drift away too far.”
“Why would I want to?” you ask, a hint of flirtation evident in your tone.
He picks up on your flirty tone, letting a smirk pull across his lips. He glances over at you with a look in his eye as he registers what you meant by that comment.
“If I didn't know any better I would say you're enjoying spending time with me, sweetheart.” 
“Don’t flatter yourself, Jacob,” you quip. 
He snickers and glances over at you again, seeing that look on your face he's all too familiar with. “I don’t have to flatter myself, sweetheart. You’re the one getting all flirty.” He grins.
“Flirty? I’m not being flirty,” you lie.
He snickers again, seeing through your lie immediately. “You have a terrible poker face,” he says. He walks closer to you as he speaks, his leg brushing yours as you walk. 
You feel a chill run down your spine at the contact and you wonder if he feels it too. You decide to change the subject, worried that this conversation may have you backed into a corner. 
“Tell me how you learned to play guitar so well,” you ask, hoping he will be willing to accept your topic change. 
He lifts his gaze to the trees as he contemplates your question. He hadn’t thought about it in a while, but he still remembers those nights all too well.
“Practice, mostly. Spent hours and hours alone in my bedroom just practicing until my arms were sore and my hands locked up. But how do you know that I play well? You watch me, sweetheart?”
You roll your eyes, letting your hands push away a few branches, “I mean, you have to play pretty well if you're selling out arenas…”
He lets out a scoff and a smirk. He was used to people complimenting his skill but for some reason, hearing you do it makes him feel a little flustered.
“I suppose so, but you didn't answer my question,” He chuckles.
“What, have I watched you play? Of course I have. I've been to a few shows with Clara.”
He seems surprised by your confession. In that moment, he begins to wonder how many times your eyes have sought him out through the lights and over the crowd.
He clears his throat and says, “Clara dragged you out to them?”
“No, I went willingly,” you admit. 
There’s a moment of silence as he processes what you just admitted. For some reason, the thought of you going to one of his shows because you wanted to go was making his heart pound a little harder in his chest.
He looks at you with a smirk to mask how thrown off he was by that.  “How come I never saw you backstage?”
You look at him with a confused look, "Did you ever look?"
Something about that question stung. The way you said the words so casually felt like a knife through his chest. He shakes his head as he responds, “No. No, you weren't there. I would remember.”
“You're right. I never went back with Clara after the shows. Didn't want to put myself in that position. I mean, that's your space, ya know? And you and I can barely be in the same room together. We haven't even had a civil conversation until, well, right now.”
He stays silent for a moment, processing your confession. After a minute he sighs and runs a hand through his hair, “I never wanted it to be like that sweetheart.”
You huff a laugh, “Your actions over the last, oh I don’t know, two years have shown otherwise.”
He grimaces when you say that, knowing that you’re right. He knows he has been a jackass to you, but for some reason hearing you confront him about it was causing a strong pang of guilt to flare up deep within his chest. He tries to shrug it off and maintain his cool, but even he can’t deny that your words were hitting him right where it hurt. 
The two of you walk for a few moments in silence, the only sound being the crunch of branches and twigs under your feet. He glances over at you, watching the way your face looked as you focused on where you stepped along the path, and he suddenly blurts out a question.
“Why is it so easy for you to make me feel guilty?”
What?
You snap your head to look at him, “I don’t know, you tell me?”
He lets out a scoff and shakes his head, pushing a limb out of the way to let you pass. “You’ve just got this way of bringing out sides of me that I don’t understand,” he grumbles.
“What do you mean?” you ask, feeling a wave of nerves wash over you. 
He falls silent as he considers how to explain what he means. It’s a hard thing to describe. It’s more than just the way you make him feel things he doesn’t usually feel around other people. It’s more than just the way you look at him, or talk to him, that makes his heart beat harder. It’s more and he knows it.
“It’s nothing, nevermind,” he pauses, “We’re here.”
You decide to let it slide, not wanting to push him into a bad mood. The two of you walk up to the edge of the rocky creek, taking in the sights. There’s a small waterfall trickling over the rocks to your right, leading out into a swimming spot and you almost moan at how appealing a dip sounds after that hike.
Jake stands just beside you, his gaze skimming over the water. He takes in the rushing sound of the creek as it flows past the large rocks and branches. He’s secretly looking at you out of the corner of his eye, watching you stare out at the creek just like he did the first time he saw it. He takes a moment to just watch you. The way your hair looks in the sunlight is catching his eye, the way your lashes flutter as you blink, the look on your face that’s soft and calm. Watching you out here in this setting is making all sorts of different emotions swirl around inside him, but he just can’t bring himself to name any of them.
“This was worth the hike,” you say, turning to meet his gaze. 
He keeps his eyes on you as you admire the creek. The way the sunlight dances against your skin makes you look as if you’re glowing. He can’t pull his eyes away from how goddamn good you look and how peaceful you seem despite everything that had happened between you two.
“Yeah. I suppose it was worth it, wasn’t it?” He agrees reluctantly.
You pull your shirt over your head, leaving you in your bikini top and shorts. You know you want to jump in, but you will wait for him to go first. 
He’s completely caught off guard by your actions, his eyes growing wide. His gaze instantly travels down to take in your bare torso, raking over your skin and lingering for just a beat too long. He immediately clears his throat and looks away, shifting uncomfortably as he feels an unfamiliar pang of heated desire in his stomach.
“You ready to swim?” he asks. You unlace your boots and leave them on the embankment, turning to look at him as he does the same. 
“Very,” you say, nodding towards the water.
He takes a moment to compose himself and avoid staring at you while you are basically half-naked. He pulls his own shirt over his head, revealing his tanned chest and arms, and sets it down beside yours on the bank of the creek.
He dips a toe into the water cautiously to test the temperature. It’s a bit cold, but it feels refreshing on his skin after all the walking you had done to get here.
“Good, let me show you why we really came here,” he says, motioning for you to follow him up a footpath. You quickly kick off your shorts and follow after him, curious as to where he is taking you. As you reach the end of the small dirt path your eyes land on the old rope hanging from the branch of an Oak tree.
“No, no way,” you stammer. 
A mischievous smirk quirks up on his face as you look at the rope. He can tell that you’re nervous just by the look in your eyes. But he would be lying if he said that he didn’t find it cute.
“Oh come on, what happened to ‘I’m not scared’?” he teases. 
“I’m not! But this is different!” you whine. 
He walks up to the rope, grabbing a hold of it and giving it a few solid pulls to test how sturdy it is. He glances over his shoulder at you to watch your face, seeing the anxiety there in your expression.
He smirks and motions towards the creek below him, “See that spot down there? It’s perfect for jumping. It’s safe. I’ve done it a hundred times. I promise.”
“I don’t know,” you say, biting at your bottom lip. 
He grins as he watches you bite your lip. Seeing you looking so nervous and cute was making his heart twist. He steps closer to you, still holding the rope in his hands. He smirks and cocks an eyebrow. “I’ll go first, okay?”
You nod and watch as he wraps his hands around the brown rope. He turns and looks back at you with an excited expression, “I’ll see you down there?”
“Okay,” you murmur, watching as he gets a running start and flies through the air before dropping down into the creek with a splash. You run to peer over the edge, watching him come up from the water with a shake of his hair. He smiles and waves you down, practically begging you to join him. 
“Come on, you can do it! I–I’ll catch you! Promise!” he shouts, “Jump, sweetheart!”
You let out a deep breath, gathering all your courage as you wait for the rope to stop swinging so you can grab it. As you reach for it you hear him cheering, still floating in the water where he landed. 
“Jump!” he yells, smiling up at you as he treads in the water. He grins as he watches you dangle from the rope, nervous to let go and jump into the water. “You’re gonna be fine! Just let go and I’ll catch you. I promise,” he yells.
With that you run, jumping off of the rock with the rope clutched tightly in your fists. Time almost seems to slow down when you jump, your body floating through the air and for a moment, it feels exhilarating.
“Let go, now!” he shouts, and so you do.
Jake waits with his arms open wide, watching as you fall down towards him from above. He can see the mixture of fear and courage on your face as you plummet towards him. He braces himself as you fall into his arms, catching you as best he can in the deep water. He pulls you close to him, his hands gripping your bare waist as your bodies press together. He can feel the adrenaline pumping through his veins as he holds you, your chest against his and your faces just inches apart. He can feel your heart pounding as he looks into your eyes.
The moment you’re in his arms, something within him snaps. All of a sudden, everything feels heightened. The feel of your body against his, the way you’re looking at him, the sound of your breathing as it slightly catches in your chest. The air between you seems almost electrified and he can feel the tension brewing in his gut.
“You caught me,” you breathe, recognizing just how close the two of you are. 
He can’t help but smirk and let out a low chuckle, still holding you against him. “I told you I would.”
You can feel your body pressed against his, the wet fabric of your bikini sticking to your skin. It’s making your brain go fuzzy and your skin tingle in a way you can’t explain.
“Thank you,” you whisper, neither of you making a move to let go of each other. 
He swallows, the tension between you feeling almost palpable. His pulse is pumping, and his breath catches in his throat as he holds onto you. He wants so badly to press you against him further and hold you tighter. Closer.
He couldn’t help glancing down at your lips, his gaze drifting down from your eyes to linger there just for a moment. You let your tongue dart out over your lips, swiping away the water dripping over them. 
He lets out a low, deep breath as he watches you. That small action has his heart racing even more, and every instinct inside him telling him to bring you closer. To claim your lips with his and taste you.
“You’re playing a dangerous game, sweetheart,” he whispers in a hoarse voice.
“Dangerous for who?” you question, biting on your lip.
He raises an eyebrow and chuckles, his grip on your hips tightening just slightly. He pulls you in closer, and you know he can feel your nipples hard and wet against his chest. Your bodies are pressed flat against one another, the cool water from the creek dripping down from your skin and onto his. He can feel your heart pounding against his chest and his pulse thrumming in his veins. 
He leans his head down so that his lips are mere millimeters away from yours and whispers huskily, “You. For you, sweetheart.”
Suddenly he releases his grip on you, swimming on his back further down the creek. Your heart is still racing in your chest from the contact. You felt something just now, and you know he did too. You feel a sick feeling in your chest at the loss of his touch. You tread water for a moment as you watch him swim away, feeling the coolness of the water against your skin and the sun beating down above you. Your mind is racing and you’re trying to process all of the different emotions and sensations that he stirred up within you just now.
Jake turns, breaking the surface to look back at you. “You coming?” he calls out to you with a smirk.
You nod, starting to swim towards him, taking notice of the smile on his face and the small dimple in his cheek. For some reason you feel the need to be close to him, you want his hands on you again, and you think maybe he does too.
He watches as you swim towards him, your body moving gracefully through the water. He can feel his heart rate increasing as he watches you approach, and he has a sudden urge to reach out and pull you against him. But instead, he composes himself and continues to tread water as you swim up to him.
He grins as you get to him, his gaze drifting over your body. “Took you long enough,” he teases.
“Where are you taking me, anyway?” you taunt, treading water next to him.
He chuckles and shakes his head, “You ask a lot of questions, you know that?”
You shrug your shoulders in the water, and with that he spins around and starts swimming further down the creek, moving towards a more secluded area. He glances over his shoulder at you as he swims, making sure you’re following him. He swims over towards the bank, pulling himself up on a collection of flat rocks. It’s a nice shady spot, and you can tell the rocks will be warm to the touch. 
He looks back at you, extending his hand to help pull you from the water. You take it, letting him pull your wet body up onto the rocks with him. He keeps hold of your hand for just a moment longer than necessary, hoping you didn’t notice, but of course you do. 
“This,” he pauses, “Is my favorite place.” He grins and motions for you to sit down, taking a seat himself. Once you’re settled, he looks out at the creek that flows past you. 
“I found it a long time ago. No one’s ever here. It’s like a little hidden treasure, I don’t even know if anyone else knows it’s here,” he says with a smile. “Actually, you’re the only person I’ve ever shown this to.”
“What? No one else?” You question. 
He shakes his head, chuckling a bit. “No one. It’s my little secret hideout.” He looks over at you and grins, his eyes taking in your figure sitting next to him. “I guess now it’s our secret hideout.”
“Oh, ours now, huh?” you tease, turning to look at him as the sun hits his cheeks. 
He laughs, his eyes still wandering over you, taking in the way the water is dripping down your sun kissed skin.
He takes a deep breath and nods, “Yeah, ours. No getting out of it now,” he says with a smirk.
You decide to push the envelope a little, swallowing nervously as you speak, “Wasn’t really planning on it.”
He grins, his eyes lighting up with mischief as he hears your flirty tone. He shifts his body towards you, his gaze drifting over your face and then down towards your chest and legs, still damp from the water.
He raises an eyebrow at you and responds in a low voice, “Good. I don’t think I’d let you, anyway.”
You decide to let the conversation end there, your pulse pounding as you look at him, the droplets of water drying on his chest. He’s hot, and you know that he knows it. The smirk on his lips hasn’t left since you made your way to the rocks and you can feel the tension between the two of you growing by the second. 
He swallows, feeling his heart begin to beat quicker as he looks at you. He wants so badly to reach out and touch you, but he holds back, knowing that doing so would probably drive him over the edge. He takes a deep breath and steadies himself. He’s not used to feeling this out of control when he’s with a woman. Normally he’s the one in charge, the one in control. But there’s something about you that makes him feel like he’s losing his grip, like he’s teetering on the edge of something new and different, and he can’t help but be drawn to it.
He shifts his body closer to you, his gaze fixed on your face as he speaks. “You want to swim some more or do you want to head back?”
“What do you want to do?” you ask, truly feeling like anything would be fun as long as it was him you were doing it with. 
He grins at you, the sparkle in his eye betraying his true desire. He wants to touch you, to pull you against him and feel your body pressed against his. But instead of saying that, he shrugs, “I’m good with whatever you want. Can’t promise we won’t find ourselves in the water again, though.”
With that you push up off the rocks and dive back into the creek, pushing the hair from your face as you resurface from the water. You splash the water up at him, soaking him and causing him to jump. 
“Oi!” he shouts, a bit of an accent peeking out from somewhere. 
“What’s wrong Kiszka? Can’t handle a little innocent splashing?” you taunt, trying to lure him into the water. What you don’t expect is for him to jump to his feet with a vengeful look in his eye. 
“Oh you just wait, sweetheart,” he pauses, charging towards you, “We will see how innocent–” 
You cut him off with another playful splash, drenching him again.  
He wipes the water from his face, shaking his head as if you have pushed him too far, “Mmhm, okay, now you’ve done it.” 
He jumps into the water next to you, wrapping his arms around you as he drags you beneath the surface. He pulls you down with him, holding you tight around the waist as you sink beneath the surface. The feeling of your body against his is intoxicating, and he revels in the sensation for a moment before popping back up and pulling you with him.
As you break the surface, he keeps his arms wrapped around you, holding you against him as you gasp for air. He grins, his smirk returning as he looks down at you. “Payback’s a hell of a thing, sweetheart.”
You push playfully at his shoulders, feeling his hands still holding your waist. A wicked grin is on his lips, and you're certain you’ve never seen someone so beautiful. He laughs as you push at him, not loosening his grip on your waist one bit. He can feel the way your body feels against his, soft and warm in stark contrast to the coolness of the water.
“Watch yourself, dove,” he warns, his smirk growing wider as he looks down at you. “You’re playing with fire.”
“How do we keep finding ourselves here,” you breathe. 
He looks down at you, his eyes locked on your face as he holds you in his arms. You feels the tension between you building, the heat of your bodies close together making your heart race in your chest.
He takes a deep breath, letting out a low chuckle as he replies, “I dunno, sweetheart, I sure don’t know.” His hand moves up to tuck a lock of your wet hair behind your ear. It feels like he wants to say more, but stops himself, settling for something else instead. “You want to head back?”
You feel a pang shoot through your chest, you don’t want to leave this spot, not now, not ever. “Sure,” you answer, and you wonder if he feels the same. 
He nods, a flicker of disappointment crossing his face. He had hoped you would say you didn’t want to leave, that you wanted to stay here just as much as he did. But he doesn’t argue with you, and instead just starts swimming towards the bank. 
“C’mon, it’s starting to get dark anyway, we should get back.” he says, letting you follow behind him. 
You find your belongings right where you left them, but the thought of putting clothes over your wet bikini has you cringing. Instead, you shove them into your backpack, holding Jake’s shirt up, silently asking him if he wants it. He shakes his head as he ties his boots, his hair still dripping down his back. You put on your own boots and sling the backpack over your shoulders, taking one last look at the creek you’d never forget. 
“You ready?” he asks, starting down the path. You nod and follow behind him, the trail lit by the perfect afternoon sun. Your hair is drying in waves around your face, much the same as his. 
He leads the way down the trail, his boots crunching on the ground below. His mind is wandering as he walks, stuck between the memory of holding you in the water just moments ago and the thought of possibly never doing it again. He sneaks glances at you out of the corner of his eye, admiring the way the sunlight is casting warm rays over your hair and face.
“Thanks for bringing me here, Jake,” you say, giving him a soft smile.
He turns to look at you, a small smile on his lips. He’s a little surprised at your sudden show of gratitude.
He shrugs a little, “You’re welcome. I come here whenever I need a break from things. It’s nice to have somewhere peaceful to escape to…” He trails off and looks away for a moment before continuing. “And nice to have someone to share it with.”
The two of you walk in content silence for most of the trail, the sun starting to dip lower and lower into the sky as the minutes pass. You notice a few clouds overhead, and thank them for a reprieve from the sun. You can feel yourself growing more and more tired with every step and before you know it you’re falling behind Jake. 
It’s as if he can hear your footsteps slowing behind him, and he stops walking, turning to look back at you. You’re several feet behind him now, your steps much more weary than they were earlier.
He raises an eyebrow as he looks at you. “You good, pretty girl?”
Your heart hammers in your chest at the pet name, but the fatigue is setting in so quickly you pay it no mind. “I don't know, I think so. I am just so exhausted suddenly.”
He sees the fatigue etched on your face, the way your steps are slowing down. He takes a step back towards you, concern evident in his eyes.
“You want to stop for a minute?” he asks, his voice softer than usual.
“How much farther is it? I can probably make it,” you ask. 
He takes a moment to think before responding, his eyes scanning over your face and your tired expression. He can tell you’re exhausted, but he also knows that you’re stubborn and determined to get back. “About another half mile, maybe a little less,” he replies. “You sure you can make it, sweetheart?”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be fine, let’s just keep going,” you say, starting to walk again. It feels like you’re carrying a bag of bricks on your back, but you push through. 
So he silently falls into step beside you, watching like a hawk for any sign of your energy giving out on you. But that's when it hits him, "What if I carried you?"
“Carried me?” you ask.
He looks at you, a smirk dancing on his lips. “Yeah, carried you. I could give you a piggyback ride the rest of the way.”
“Jake, no…” you whine, deep down loving the idea. 
He laughs aloud at your protest, his eyes dancing with mischief. “Oh, come on, sweetheart, you know you want to. I can see it in your eyes. I bet your legs are going to give out on you any second now.”
“Are you sure?” you ask, feeling hesitant, but he is offering.
He grins, seeing the wheels turning in your head. “I'm sure. C’mere.” He motions for you to turn around, holding his arms open for you to climb onto his back.
You feel his arms wrap around your legs as you climb onto his back, feeling the warmth of his skin against your chest. You practically melt into him, your arms wrapping around his shoulders as your nose brushes against his hair, still wet from the creek.
He grunts a bit as you climb onto his back, the weight of you against him sending a wave of warmth through his body. He wraps his arms tightly around your legs, securely holding you in place, and is suddenly acutely aware of how close you are to each other. He can feel your breath on the back of his neck and the way your chest is pressed against his shoulders, the sensation making his heart beat a little faster than usual.
“Are you sure this is okay?" you ask, splaying your hand against his chest.
He takes a deep breath, enjoying the feeling of your hand on his skin. He nods, his voice a little huskier than usual. “Yeah, it's fine. Don't you worry ‘bout a thing, sweetheart.”
He adjusts his grip on you slightly, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your thighs.
You walk like that for a little bit, your body quickly succumbing to the rhythmic bouncing from every step he takes. You find your eyes growing heavy, and your head starting to droop, and before you know it, your head is resting on his warm shoulder. 
He can't help but smile to himself as he realizes you've fallen asleep on his back. He adjusts his grip on you, trying to keep you as secure as possible as he continues walking down the trail, humming softly and feeling oddly content with the situation he has found himself in. 
It feels like seconds have passed before he gently taps your leg, waking you up as he speaks. “Hey, sleepyhead. We made it.”
He waits for you to regain your bearings and loosen your grip on him before carefully lowering you down from his back, his hands lingering at your waist for a moment longer than necessary.
“That felt like two minutes, tops,” you giggle.
He laughs, a soft chuckle that makes his chest vibrate. “Yeah, you passed out pretty fast there,” he pauses, “You hungry? I’m starving.”
“Starving,” you answer, maybe a little too quickly. 
He laughs again, the sound still as charming as usual. “Yeah, figured as much. Let's get something going.” 
He makes his way to the cooler, opening it up and pulling a pack of hotdogs from inside, “This looks like it,” he smiles, “Let me get the fire going and we will be cooking in no time.”
“Thanks for carrying me, Jake. Sorry I fell asleep on you,” you say, lowering your voice a little. 
He grins as he sets the hot dogs down, looking up at you. “No problem. And no need to apologize for dozing off.” He glances up as he strikes a match, igniting the kindling. “It was kind of...cute.”
Cute? Oh.
A strong gust of wind blows through the campsite, taking both of you by surprise, tossing a camp chair to its side. 
“Damn,” he says, moving to pick up the chair. He looks up to the sky, the clouds growing heavy and darkening. “We may be in for a bit of rain.”
“Tents are waterproof, right?” you ask nervously.
He chuckles at your question, a hint of playfulness in his voice. “Yeah, sweetheart, tents are waterproof.”
“Don’t laugh at me!” you whine. 
He grins, enjoying your playful pout. “I can't help it, you make it too easy.”
He looks at you again, the fire casting a warm glow over his features. “How about you go change into some dry clothes, these hotdogs will be done soon.”
You nod and head into your tent, stripping out of your bathing suit and pulling a t-shirt over your sun warmed skin. You add a pair of leggings and his flannel before stepping back out and seeing him assemble the hotdogs. Your stomach is growling, and you quickly realize you hadn’t eaten all day. 
He looks up as you come out of your tent, his eyes lingering on the way his flannel covers your form. He can feel his heart skip a beat at the sight of you in his shirt, but quickly composes himself.
He grins as he sees your expression, your hunger evident. “Ready?”
You nod as he hands you a paper plate, taking the seat next to you at the fire. The air is cooler than it was last night, and the humidity is growing by the second. Both of you quickly eat, very few words shared between the two of you. 
You both toss the paper plates into the fire, making quick work of cleaning up. He disappears into his tent for a few minutes, emerging in warmer clothes. His cheeks have a pink glow from the sun today, and you can’t help but think it makes him all the more pretty in the fire light.
“So what do you think, you gonna make us s’mores again tonight?” he asks, crossing his feet on the ledge of the fire pit.
You turn to look at him, “What? I thought you didn’t like them?”
He laughs softly, turning to look at you, “I like them when you make them,” he says, his confession warming your chest.
“Are you getting soft on me, Kiszka?” you tease, standing up to grab the ingredients from the cooler.
“Me? Soft?” he scoffs, pretending to be offended. “Never in a million years, sweetheart.”
He grins, the corners of his lips curling into a smirk, betraying his feigned annoyance. He grabs the two sticks from last night, holding them out to you as you place the marshmallows on the ends. This time you give him his own stick to hold, both of you twirling the sugary puffs in the flames. 
He carefully twirls his own marshmallow in the flames, occasionally stealing glances at you as you do the same. The air is quiet, save for the crackle of the fire and the distant sound of crickets, a rumble sounds in the distance but you both ignore it.
As the marshmallows puff up, you pull them from the fire, placing them gently on the graham cracker and chocolate. They melt perfectly and again, you offer him his first. He takes it from your hand, biting into it quickly, as you do the same. 
“Truly, I think it’s something about you,” he admits, taking another bite. “They just taste better when you do it.”
“It’s all in your head,” you laugh, licking marshmallows from your finger. His eyes watch as your tongue swipes over the digits, his throat bobbing as he swallows back his nerves. 
A yawn falls from your lips as he looks at you, the earlier exhaustion creeping up on you again. 
“You look tired, sweetheart.”
“I am, it just hit me out of nowhere again,” you admit. 
He chuckles softly, his shoulder brushing against yours. “Yeah, I can tell. You’ve been fighting it for the past twenty minutes.” He looks at you intently, studying your expression in the firelight. “Wanna call it a night?”
“What about you? I don't wanna leave you out here all by yourself?”
He shakes his head, a small smile on his lips. “Don't worry about me, sweetheart. I can handle myself.” He looks at you, a hint of playfulness in his gaze. “Besides, I don't mind being out here alone. It’s peaceful this time of night.”
“You sure?” you ask, a hint of guilt in your tone. 
He grins, his gaze unwavering as he looks at you. “Yeah, I'm sure. I'll just hang out until the fire smolders and enjoy the quiet out here before I head in.”
He can see the tiredness in your eyes, and he wants nothing more than to tuck you into the tent and hold you against him all night. But he keeps that last thought to himself. 
“Okay, well, thanks again for today. For showing me your secret place. I had a lot of fun with you," you say, clutching the cuffs of his flannel in your fists.
His heart skips a beat at your words, the sincerity in your tone making his chest ache. He looks at you, his gaze softening as he takes you in. “Don’t mention it, dove. I had a lot of fun too.” he says, his voice barely above a whisper.
You nod with a bashful smile, “Goodnight, Jake.”
He smiles at you, his gaze lingering on you for a moment before he replies. “Goodnight, sweetheart.”
He watches as you disappear into your tent, his eyes fixated on the flaps even after you’ve gone inside. He takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself as he looks back to the fire.
He sits there for a while longer, his thoughts consumed by images of you. He can practically still feel the way your skin felt against his, the weight of you on his back as he carried you down the trail. He can still picture the way you looked in his flannel, your eyes tired but still filled with a spark that sent shockwaves through his body. He wanted you, and he always had.
Despite his best efforts he found the feelings that he pushed down for so long had resurfaced with a vengeance, briefly making him question whether they were ever really gone at all. He’d  made up a hundred reasons why he shouldn’t want you, letting it show in his harsh words and hostile demeanor, all the while letting you root your way deeper and deeper into his heart with every caught smile and laugh. He’d done such a good job pushing you away that he started to believe the lies he was telling himself over the last two years. Although, that all came to a screeching halt the minute he decided to let you in last night. The minute you showed him that you wanted to know him beyond surface level, and the minute he realized you were everything he told himself you weren’t.
Inside your tent you are snuggling down into your sleeping bag, replaying the day over and over. The way his hands felt on you, the smile you drew out of him, all of it. You wanted to run back out there and beg him to join you in here, but you know you can't. 
You can hear the fire still crackling, and the sway of the trees in the wind. Thunder is rumbling in the distance, growing closer and closer. You zip the window flaps on your tent for good measure, but that's when you hear it. The sound of a guitar, softly strumming in the breeze. You can tell he is trying to play quietly, but part of you wishes it was just a little louder. 
You don’t recognize the song, but it's soft and sweet and twists your heart in two. You want to know the name. Did he write it? Is it even a real song yet? Instead you lay there, letting the music his hands are producing play you to sleep, wishing every night could be like tonight.
A crash of lightning pulls you from your sleep, the sound of the nylon ripping overhead, pulling a scream from your chest. Rain starts to pour into your tent, drenching you and all of your belongings before you even have time to process what's happening. You pull yourself out of your soaking wet tent to see the storm raging around you. The trees whipping wildly through the wind, and the rain falling so hard you can barely see. You turn to look at your tent finding a tree branch laying across the fiberglass poles, effectively ripping the top of your tent. 
“Shit!” you scream, trying to pull your soaked belongings from inside. Jake must have heard the commotion, pulling on his boots as he rushes over towards you.
“What’s going on? What happened?” he shouts, dripping wet from the pouring rain. His eyes are panicked as they search yours for an answer. 
“The tree! A branch fell and ripped my tent, everything is wet! I–”
He grabs your arms, pulling you a little closer to him, “Are you okay?” he asks, not caring about the tent. You came first. 
“Yes, yes! I’m fine, I just– my tent!” you cry, feeling overwhelmed. 
He curses under his breath, the sight of your slashed tent and your wet clothes fueling the anger inside of him. "Damn it," he shouts, trying to keep his cool as he surveys the damage. “Okay, look, just, go get in my tent. I’ll be there in a second.”
You nod graciously and head over to his tent, unzipping the flap and stepping inside. It’s much larger than yours and is filled with real camping equipment. It’s warm, and is lit with a lantern. You see his things laying neatly by his bag, and you do your best not to drip water onto everything. 
Jake watches as you head towards his tent, disappearing inside and zipping the flap behind you. He lets out a breath, running a frustrated hand through his hair before he turns back to your tent. He grabs the offending branch, tossing it aside before he starts to gather your items from inside. He carefully picks up your belongings, dashing over to his car and tossing them in the backseat. His boots are caked with mud as he makes his way back to his tent, leaving his boots outside as he joins you inside. 
“I tried to salvage your stuff, but everything is soaked. I put it in my car to dry out but…” he pauses, wiping the rain off of him as is drips down his face. 
“Thank you,” you breathe, realizing that both of you are wet and freezing now. He has the same realization as he crawls towards his bag.
He nods in response to your gratitude, his fingers digging through his belongings to find a dry shirt for you. He pulls out a plain t-shirt, the fabric soft and well-worn. He turns back to you, handing you the shirt as his gaze flits over your soaked form. 
“Here, put this on for now,” he says gruffly, trying to keep his train of thought focused on practicality and not how good you look wearing his clothes. “I just need to change into some dry clothes and then you can go back to sleep.”
“What?” you question, unsure of his logic. 
“I’ll change and then I’ll go sleep in my car, you can take the air mattress,” he says, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world that you’d get the better accommodations. 
“What? Jake, no. I’m not taking your tent and making you sleep in your car. No way.” you say, putting your foot down. “I’ll sleep in your car.”
He sits there, stunned at your words. He wasn't expecting resistance from you, expecting you to happily accept him taking the brunt of the damage.
“No, Y/N. Absolutely not. You’ll be much warmer here with the sleeping bag and the air mattress. You’re shivering, you’re not sleeping in the cold ass car,” he snaps, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Well, I’m not letting you sleep in the car,” you argue. “We can just– both share the air mattress. I’m fine with it if you are.”
He looks at you incredulously, his brain short-circuiting at your suggestion. The thought of sharing that small space with you, of being that close to you in the dark, is both tantalizing and terrifying. He opens his mouth to argue again, but the words get stuck in his throat. He swallows hard, his eyes flicking over your figure again. He wants to protest, to say no and keep his distance, but the look in your eyes dares him to argue.
“Fine,” he relents, his voice gruff and reluctant. “But only if you're sure you're okay with it."
“I’m okay with it Jake,” your voice softer now.
He nods, his eyes searching your expression to be sure you mean it. You nod again and he understands. He digs into his bag again producing a pair of worn gray sweatpants, handing them to you with a gleam in his eye. 
You take the sweatpants from him, your fingers brushing against his for a moment. It's a brief contact, but it sends a jolt of electricity through your body. He turns to give you a bit of privacy, despite seeing you half naked already once today. You quickly strip out of your soaked clothes, shivering from the cold air on your bare skin. You pull on the sweatpants, the warm, soft fabric enveloping your legs. You pull the wet shirt from your body and toss it to the ground before putting on the t-shirt that smells exactly like him. 
“Okay, I'm good,” you say, your voice soft.
He turns around and his breath stutters at the sight of you in his clothes. The sweatpants are a little baggy on you, the legs pooling around your ankles. The t-shirt clings to your curves, the fabric stretched tight over your chest. He can feel his heart pounding in his chest, his body reacting to the sight of you more than it should.
He swallows hard, trying to keep his cool. “You look–” he starts to say, his voice cracking slightly.
“Warm?” you smile, suddenly feeling a bit shy. 
He manages to nod in response to your question, his voice gravelly when he speaks. “Yeah,” he says, his eyes flickering to your face for a moment before darting away again. “Warm."
You turn to offer him the same privacy, listening as you hear his wet clothes hit the ground. He is quick to change, pulling on a pair of boxer shorts and a black long sleeve t-shirt. 
“All good,” he says, moving closer to the air mattress. You try not to stare at him in his boxers, but it’s hard not to. 
He motions towards the air mattress, and you crawl towards it, positioning yourself on one side as he takes the other. You notice that you must be occupying the side he was previously on, seeing a book and a water bottle sitting next to your head. 
He crawls onto the air mattress beside you, the small space suddenly feeling much smaller with the two of you in it. He tries to keep some distance between you both, not wanting to get too close and make you uncomfortable.  The air in the tent is thick with tension, the heat of your bodies so close together in the small space. The rain continues to pour outside, falling harshly against the nylon of the tent.
He can hear your breathing, the sound of each intake of breath filling the silence between you. He's acutely aware of your presence beside him, your body just inches away from his, and he is doing everything in his power from pulling you into him.
“Were you reading?” you ask, trying to fill the silence. He looks surprised that you've spoken, his eyes flickering over to you for a moment. He'd been caught up in his thoughts, lost in the feeling of being so close to you in the small space.
He nods, gesturing towards the book next to your head. “Yeah, I was.” he says, his voice a little gruff. “It's a pretty good book.”
“What's it about?” you ask, rolling to face him.
He takes a moment to remember the premise of the book, his mind still a little clouded with the feeling of being so close to you.
“It's um, it’s a crime thriller,” he replies. “It's about a detective trying to solve a series of murders in a small town. It's pretty intense, actually.” 
You giggle, “I wouldn't have taken you for a thriller novel kind of guy.”
He raises an eyebrow at your response, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “And what kind of guy did you think I would be?” he asks, his tone a mix of curiosity and amusement.
“I don’t know. Maybe a biography guy? History maybe?”
He chuckles at your response, a small laugh escaping his lips. “Biographies and history, huh? I mean, I read those too,” he says with a smirk. “But I like a good thriller from time to time.”
He glances over at you, his eyes trailing over your features as you yawn. He reaches over and turns off the lantern, leaving the two of you in darkness with the sound of the rain. 
“You tired?” he asks, his voice a little softer now. 
“Yeah, a little, but that kind of woke me up. I can't lie,” you answer, shivering a little as you lay on the air mattress. Jake seems to notice and immediately sits up, unzipping his sleeping bag and tossing half of it onto your body. His movements are quick and practiced, his eyes flickering to your face to make sure you're covered up.
He lays back down, his body now closer to yours under the shared cover. He takes a deep breath, trying to calm the racing of his heart. The silence hangs in the air again, the sound of the rain outside the only noise breaking through the tension between you. He can hear your breathing beside him, your body so close to his under the covers. He's acutely aware of the feel of your body heat radiating against his skin, the proximity of your bodies igniting a spark inside of him.
He tries to keep his eyes trained on the ceiling of the tent, but they keep drifting back towards you, taking in the way your hair fans out around your face as you look at him.
“I’m glad you’re okay, Y/N,” he says, his voice barely a whisper. 
You slide your hand up to rest on his cheek, warm and stubbly, “Thank you for coming to save me,” you breathe.
His breath hitches in his throat at the feeling of your hand on his cheek, the touch sending a shiver down his spine. He leans into your palm, his eyes fluttering closed for just a moment. He can feel his heart racing in his chest, the warmth of your touch making his skin tingle. He opens his eyes, looking over at you with a mixture of surprise and something else. Something...soft.
“I'll always come save you,” he says, his voice low and gentle.
Your eyes flick down to his lips, pink and full, before meeting his dark brown eyes again. “All this time I thought you hated me.”
He swallows hard, his eyes fixed on yours as he hears your words. He can feel the tension coiled tight in the space between you, the atmosphere thick with unspoken desire. He hesitates for a moment, his eyes flickering over your face as if he's searching for something. 
Finally, he speaks. “I don't hate you,” he says, his voice low and soft. “I’ve never hated you, I always liked you. Too much, probably.”
“What?”
He takes a deep breath, the words spilling out of him before he can stop them.
“I never hated you, sweetheart,” he repeats, his voice softer this time. “I always liked you, maybe a little too much. I remember when Josh met Clara, he told me that you, specifically, were off limits. Of course at that point it was already too late. I swear it just made me want you more. I knew I couldn't go against him, though. I knew he had his reasons. I just...I didn’t know how to deal with it, being around you and not being able to have you, so I pushed you away. It was the only thing that worked.”
His eyes meet yours, his expression vulnerable and open. “It was easier to be cold to you than to be myself and fall for someone that I can't have.”
“Jake,” you breathe, sliding your thumb against his cheek. He closes his eyes at the sound of his name on your lips, feeling your thumb glide along his skin. It feels like electricity zipping through his body, igniting every nerve ending all at once. He turns his face towards your touch, his cheek pressing into your palm as he revels in the feeling.
“He didn’t even tell me that you were going to be on this trip. He knew I wouldn’t have come if I knew you were going to be here, too. He knew I wouldn’t subject myself to that. Honestly, I was doing okay controlling myself, until today.”
“Today, at the creek…” you continue. 
His eyes flutter open, his gaze locking with yours as he hears you mention it. The memory of that moment floods through his mind, the sight of your body in the water burned into his brain.
He swallows hard, his throat dry as he nods in response. “Yeah,” he whispers. “Today at the creek,” he repeats, his voice hoarse. 
You nod your head and bite your lip as your mind replays its own memories. 
He shifts his body subtly closer to you, the heat between you growing with each passing moment. He can feel the tension building to a fever pitch, the air thick with desire and need.
“I wanted to kiss you, sweetheart. I really did. I almost did. Touching you like that, fuck. You letting me carry you back. Just sitting by the fire with you. It’s the best day I have had in a long ass time. Didn’t want it to end, but I knew you were exhausted. I wanted to tell you tonight, but things just didn’t work out. I figured it was probably for the best,” he confesses, his eyes never leaving yours. 
Your hand drops to his chest, the warmth of his skin evident through his t-shirt, “I wanted you to kiss me, Jake. I wanted your hands on me, everywhere. In fact, I never don’t want your hands on me,” you say, feeling his hand nervously slide up and over the curve of your waist. 
He listens to your words, disbelief and desire warring within him as he realizes you feel the same way he does. He swallows hard, his hand on your waist trembling slightly as he absorbs your words. He slides closer to you, his body now pressed snugly against yours under the covers. Your faces are so close that he can feel your breath on his cheek.
“Well fuck me, sweetheart,” he growls. His eyes rake over your features, taking in the way your pupils are dilating with desire, the flush on your cheeks and the way your breath hitches when he moves closer to you.
He’s never seen you look so beautiful, and the realization that he’s the cause of it makes his heart swell in his chest. “I’ve wanted you for so long,” he whispers, his voice barely louder than a breath. 
“Jake,” you beg. 
His heart clenches at the sound of you begging for him, the need in your voice nearly driving him mad with desire. He wants to hear you say his name again and again, to feel your body against his and your skin under his hands.
He leans closer to you, his breath warm against your neck as he speaks. “Say my name again, sweetheart,” he murmurs, his voice low and rough.
“Kiss me, Jake,” you plead, unable to wait a second longer. 
He doesn’t need to be told twice. At your words, he crashes his lips against yours in a desperate kiss, all of the tension and desire between you finally igniting in a blaze of passion.
His hands roam over your body, exploring all the curves he’s wanted to touch for so long. He kisses you deeply, his tongue teasing the seam of your lips, seeking entry into your mouth.
He shifts his body over yours, pinning you to the air mattress as he continues to kiss you hungrily. His hands slide up your body, fingers tangling in your hair as he holds your head in place, his tongue delving deeper into your mouth.
He moans lowly, the sound muffled as his body presses flush against yours under the covers. He can feel the heat radiating off of you, the sensation driving him mad with desire. 
Your hands snake around his waist, sliding beneath his shirt, and pulling it up and over his head. He lets out a sharp breath as he feels your hands on his skin, the feeling of your fingers against his bare flesh sending a shiver down his spine. He breaks the kiss for just a moment, pulling back just enough to let you yank the shirt over his head and toss it aside.
He takes a moment to admire your flushed cheeks and the way your eyes trail over his now bare torso. He grins at the hungry look in your eyes as you take in his muscular chest and stomach. 
“Don’t look at me like that sweetheart, it’ll get you into trouble.” he warns.
“I like trouble,” you say, drinking in the sight of him as he pins you to the air mattress. 
He laughs at your response, the sound deep and gravelly in his chest. “You would,” he says, a smirk playing on his lips. “I think that’s why I like you.”
He leans back down to capture your lips in another kiss, his bare chest now pressed against yours. He runs his hands up and down your sides, his fingers tracing the curve of your waist and the swell of your hips beneath your sweatpants.
As he kisses you, he slips his thigh between your legs, pressing his body even closer against yours. He runs his tongue along your jawbone, trailing kisses along your neck as he moves down to your throat.
He sucks lightly at your pulse point, nipping at the sensitive skin before soothing it with his tongue. His fingers reach for the hem of your t-shirt slowly dragging it up over your body.  “Take this off for me, dove,” he whispers.
You lift up, letting him drag the old, threadbare shirt over your chest. His eyes take in the sight of your bare skin in the low light of the tent. His breath stutters at the sight of your body, the way the light dances across your curves making his throat go dry.
He lets out a low moan as he looks at you, his hands roaming freely over your bare skin. “Goddamn,” he says, his voice thick with desire. “You’re gorgeous.”
His hands trace the curves of your breasts, sliding down over your waist and to the waistband of your sweatpants. His eyes lock onto yours as his hands move down your body, his touch searing against your skin. He teases at the waistband of your sweatpants, his fingers tracing soft circles against your hip bones.
He can feel the warmth of your body beneath his palm, the way your skin twitches in anticipation under his touch sending a jolt of desire through his body. “Can I take these off?” he whispers, his voice rough with need.
“Please,” you beg. 
He grins at your response, the sound of you begging awakening something primal in him. He slides his hands into the waistband of your sweatpants, his fingers brushing lightly against your skin as he slowly starts to pull them down your legs.
His eyes never leave your face as he exposes more and more of your body, his tongue darting out to wet his lips in anticipation. Once he's removed the offending article of clothing, he lets his gaze roam over your body once again. His eyes trail over your bare skin, taking in the way the light from the storm outside casts shadows over your curves. He reaches out, his hands tracing over your legs, his touch gentle and reverent.
He can feel the heat radiating from your core, the way your body responds to his touch making him ache with desire. He leans down, pressing kisses over your stomach and hips, his lips roaming over your skin like a man starved.
You can hardly stand it, the feel of his lips on your skin is making you feel insane, “Touch me, Jake,” you plead. 
He lets out a low groan at your words, the sound sending a shiver down his spine. He leans back, locking his eyes with yours as he reaches for your hips once again, gripping them firmly.
“I'll touch you, baby,” he whispers, his voice thick with desire. “As much as you want. Where do you want my hands, sweetheart?”
“Everywhere, Jake. I told you,” you beg. 
“That’s quite the request, darling,” he says, the sound of the air mattress echoing as he repositions himself as carefully as possible. Your hands tug at the waistband of his boxers, eliciting a laugh from his chest. 
“Impatient, baby?”
“I just want you, Jake.” you confess. 
“I want you too, sweetheart, you have no idea,” he whispers, his eyes locking with yours.
He pushes his boxers down, kicking them off somewhere in the tent as he moves back over you. He braces himself on his forearms, his body pressed flush against yours again as he looks down at you. You get a wicked gleam in your eye, hooking your leg around his, and twisting until you are over top of him, straddling his waist. 
He grins up at you, his eyes raking over your body. “Well I’ll be damned, look at you,” he says, a note of surprise and arousal in his voice.
You give him a proud smile, sitting happily on top of him, enjoying the view below. You can feel how wet you are as it coats your inner thighs, and you know he is privy to this as well as the light reflects from your thighs.  
“You look so damn good on top of me,” he says, his voice rough and low. “Like you belong there. It’s fuckin’ hot.”
“You’re fucking hot,” you counter, brushing the hair off of his face. 
He lets out a laugh at your words, a grin spreading across his face. “And so articulate too,” he teases, his grip on your hips tightening as he speaks. His hand moves towards your center, his thumb brushing lightly against your clit. 
“Jesus,” you whine, his touch sending you soaring. 
“Not here, love,” he smirks. 
You grind yourself against him, a moan falling from his lips, “What was that you were saying?” you ask playfully. 
“Oh shit,” he groans, his hands gripping your hips tighter as you continue to move against him. He opens his eyes, locking them with yours as he tries to compose himself. “Don’t tease me sweetheart, it’s unbecoming.” he says, his voice rough.
You lift up to your knees, hovering over him enough to grab his length in your fist. A hiss leaves his chest at your touch, his jaw falling open as his eyes lock on yours. You drag his tip through your wetness, his eyes growing impossibly darker at the sensation. 
“Fuck me,” he pants, “Listen, if we’re gonna do this, I want to go slow. I have fucking dreamed about this moment. That and if I fuck you how I want to fuck you, we will pop this air matress. That will be for another time.”
You nod as you slowly sink down over him, taking every inch he has to offer. “Another time, huh? What makes you think–”
He delivers a pointed thrust up into you, stealing the air from your lungs. 
“That. That’s what makes me think, sweetheart,” he answers, grabbing your hips and helping you start to move on top of him. 
“Fuck, Jake,” you whine, feeling him stretch you out so completely. So fully. 
He lets out a low growl at your words, the sound filled with desire and need. “Yeah?” he asks, his voice low and gruff.
His hands grip your hips even tighter as you move above him, his fingers digging into your skin as his body responds to your movements. “You feel so good, sweetheart, better than I imagined.” he groans, his eyes locked on yours.
You start to move your hips in a wave pattern, his length hitting you right where you need him. A cry leaves your chest as you toss your head back, feeling his hand move to support your lower back. The heat of the tent combined with the friction between you is making things even hotter, both of you growing sweaty and breathless as you move against each other.
He lets out a low moan, his hands moving up your body to grip your shoulders tightly. “Christ, baby, you’re a fucking dream,” he groans, his body arching up against yours as he snaps his hips up to meet yours. 
“Harder, Jake,” you plead. 
He lets out a sharp gasp as you say his name, his eyes darkening with desire. “Harder?” he asks, his voice thick and rough. “You want it harder, sweetheart?”
“Please, baby,” you whine.
He lets out a low growl at your plea, his hands tightening on your shoulders. “Yeah sweetheart, I got you.” he murmurs, his voice low and guttural. “Give you anything you want.”
You lean down letting him capture your lips in a passionate kiss, his tongue delving into your mouth as he pulls you closer against him. His hips buck upwards with more force now, his body moving against yours with increasing intensity. Your stomach is burning with need and you know it won’t be much longer until you burst into flames. 
“Don’t stop, baby, please,” you cry out, feeling your stomach growing hot. He lets out a muffled groan at your words, his hands gripping you tighter as he continues to fuck you. 
“God, you feel incredible,” he gasps, his mouth moving to your neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin. His hands move towards your ass, his fingers gripping into the supple flesh as he thrusts up into you. Your skin is slick with sweat and arousal, the lewd sounds filling the tent with the sound of the rain. He can hardly contain his moans now, matching your energy in the small tent.
“Sit up, I want to look at your tits while I fuck you,” he growls. 
You hear a hint of dominance fall from his lips and you can’t help but to obey. You sit up, straddling him again, as he leans up on his elbows to watch you. 
He lets out a guttural moan as you do as he asks, sitting up above him and giving him an even better view of your body. He runs his hand up your thigh, his eyes locked on your face.
“You like this?” you say, swirling your hips in a figure eight. 
“Yeah, sweetheart,” he growls, his hands gripping your hips tightly. “I like this a lot.” His hand moves to cup at your tits, bouncing as you continue to fuck him. “You’re so fucking wet for me, baby.”
“I always am,” you say, biting at your bottom lip as you try to stave off your orgasm. 
He smiles at your response, his hands still gripping your thighs. He leans up again, capturing your lips in another intense kiss, his tongue sliding against yours as he pulls you closer against him. He bites at your lower lip, his teeth grazing your skin softly. The feeling of his teeth on your skin pushes you over the edge, and you’re sure he can feel you tightening around him. 
“I’m close, baby,” you whine. 
"Yeah?" he asks, his voice thick with desire. "Gonna come for me, sweetheart?"
He slides his hand down between your bodies, his fingers finding the sensitive bundle of nerves and circling it slowly and insistently. “Come for me, baby,” he whispers, his mouth moving to your ear. “Come right on my cock, just like this.”
“Come with me, Jake,” you beg, feeling his lips connect to the side of your neck. 
He lets out a low groan at your words, his body shuddering as he nears the edge. “Yeah...yeah I'm there sweetheart, I’m right fucking there,” he gasps, his hands gripping you tightly as his body moves against yours. “Say you’re mine, baby.”
Just the thought of him wanting to claim you as his sends you over the edge, your body giving in to your orgasm as you fall apart on top of him. “I’m yours Jake. Yours.”
He lets out a deep, guttural moan at your words, his body shuddering as he loses himself in your arms. “That’s right sweetheart, you're fucking mine,” he gasps, his voice ragged. “Mine and no one else's.”
He holds you close as he comes, his body shaking and shuddering against yours. "Fuck," he groans, his grip on you tight as he rides out the waves of his own release, hot as it spills inside of you. 
“Jake, fuck,” you pant, finally coming down from what is probably the best orgasm of your life. 
“God you’re fucking sexy,” he pants, “Jesus Christ. Incredible, actually.”
“You’re incredible,” you smile, lifting up and off of him. His hands don’t leave you though, not wanting you to stray too far. 
He grins at your words, his arms tightening around you as he holds you close. “You give me too much credit, sweetheart,” he says, his voice gruff and spent. “We just fucked on an air mattress,” he laughs.
He leans back and looks at you, a satisfied smile on his face. “God, you have no idea how long I've wanted to do that,” he admits, his eyes roving over your face.
“Probably as long as I have if I had to guess,” you smile. 
He lets out a low chuckle, a grin spreading across his face as he nods. “You'd be right about that,” he says, his fingers tracing idle patterns on your skin. “I've wanted you for a long time, sweetheart. Longer than I care to admit.”
“Well you have me now?” you say nervously.
His expression softens at your words, a smile spreading across his face. “Yeah, I do,” he says softly. He cups your face in his hand, his thumb tracing over your cheek. “And I'm not letting you go. You're mine now, sweetheart.”
“I think I always wanted to be,” you confess.
He grins at your words, a possessive glint in his eyes. “Yeah?”
You nod sweetly as you reach for your clothes, the chill returning to the tent. You hand him his shirt and his boxers, pulling his sweats and t-shirt back over your body. He watches as you dress yourself in his clothing, a satisfied smile on his face. 
“You look so fucking hot in my clothes, please never try to give them back,” he says, his eyes raking over you with a smile. 
You giggle and shake your head, watching him pull his own clothes on before crawling back onto the air mattress. You snuggle into his side, feeling his arms wrap around you. He pulls you closer against him, nuzzling his face into your damp hair, his breath hot against your neck.
He lets out a content sigh, his fingers tracing lazy circles on your skin as he holds you close. “I could get used to this,” he murmurs, his voice soft and sleepy.
“Oh, no, I thought you liked camping alone,” you tease with a giggle.
He laughs, his chest rumbling against your back. “Yeah yeah, shut up,” he says playfully, giving your side a squeeze. He snuggles into you more, burying his face in your neck and inhaling deeply. “Don't get used to me wanting your company,” he jokingly warns you.
“Oh yeah? Want me gone by morning?” you taunt, letting your fingers trace shapes into his stomach.
He grins against your skin, his arms tightening around you. “Oh, I don't know if I'll wait that long,” he teases back. He presses soft, gentle kisses along your neck and shoulder, his lips moving slowly over your skin. “I might just kick you out now.”
“Ahh, there you are. I was wondering where you went. You were being far too sweet.” you tease.
He laughs, pulling back to look at you. “Oh? You prefer me mean, is that it?” he asks, raising an eyebrow at you. He gives you a playful nudge, a teasing glint in his eyes. “I can be an ass if you want, sweetheart. It really is no problem.”
“No, no. I think I'll keep you just like this.” you say nuzzling under his chin. You listen to the steady beating of his heart, feeling your eyes grow tired. He runs his fingers through your hair, a soft, soothing gesture meant to lull you to sleep. He grins slightly as he feels your breathing begin to slow, knowing that you're on the verge of sleep. 
“Tired, sweetheart?” he asks quietly, his voice soft and low.
“I am now,” you whisper. 
He lets out a soft chuckle at your sleepy response, his arms still wrapped tightly around you. He plants a soft kiss on the top of your head, his fingers resuming their gentle caresses through your hair. 
“Then close your eyes,” he murmurs, his voice even quieter now. “I'll be here when you wake up.”
“Goodnight, Jake,” you breathe, slipping quickly. 
“Goodnight, sweetheart,” he whispers, his voice low and soothing. He presses a soft kiss to your forehead, his fingers continuing to gently massage your scalp as he feels you slowly drift off to sleep.
You wake the next morning finding that the sun hasn't risen fully yet, and the air is chilly. You’re warm though, wrapped up in Jake beneath the sleeping bag.  He feels you stirring next to him, a smile spreading across his face as he feels you wake up. He's been lying awake for a little while now, just watching you sleep and enjoying the feeling of you in his arms.
“Good morning,” he murmurs, his voice low and rough with sleep. 
“Morning,” you answer, turning to look at his tired face.
He grins as you reply to him, his arms tightening around you. “Sleep well?” he asks, his fingers tracing idle patterns on your skin.
“So good. Did you?” you ask with a sleepy yawn.
He chuckles softly, his chest rumbling against your back. “Yeah, I slept great,” he replies, his voice still rough and gravelly. He shifts slightly, pulling you closer against him and nuzzling his face into your hair. “Best night's sleep I've had in a long time.”
You smile as you roll into him, placing a kiss on his warm chest.
He lets out a low groan at your kiss, his body shuddering slightly as he feels your lips on his skin. “Careful, sweetheart. You keep doing things like that and we'll never get out of this tent.”
“I’m kinda sad that we have to leave today,” you say, tilting your head up to meet his eyes. 
He smiles down at you, his eyes soft and tender. “Yeah, me too,” he admits, his hand coming up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “It's been nice having you all to myself. Don't want to share you with the rest of the world, now.”
You giggle against his chest, a warmth washing over you as you feel his fingers moving lazily against your skin, “Ugh, the rest of the world, don’t remind me…”
“Actually, speaking of, Josh texted me,” he says, a chuckle leaving his chest. 
“Did he?”
“Yeah, said he hoped we hadn’t killed each other because neither of them had heard from us since they left,” he smiles, pulling you tight against him. 
You gasp, realizing he’s right, “Shit, I– I totally forgot about them.”
He laughs, his chest rumbling beneath you, “Yeah, I did too. I guess we were just– a little preoccupied,” he grins. 
“Do we tell them?” you ask nervously. 
He considers it for a moment, a thoughtful expression on his face, “I mean, yeah, we probably should,” he pauses, “They don’t need the details, but I think they should know.”
“Won’t Josh be mad?” you ask, scared of his answer. 
He laughs at your question. “Yeah, absolutely he will. He'll give me one of his long winded lectures about being nice to you and treating you right. Make some threats about what he'll do if I hurt you. You know, the usual.” 
You nudge him with your elbow, “Maybe that isn’t a half bad idea,” you tease.
He laughs, feigning offense. “Hey now, don't side with him,” he says, giving you a playful nudge in return. He pulls you closer against him, his arms wrapping around you tightly. “But seriously, I don't think Josh will be too surprised. I think he's always known something was bound to happen between the two of us whether he wanted it to or not.”
“I’m glad it finally did.”
He grins, his eyes locking on yours. “Me too, sweetheart.” He pulls you closer, his body enveloping yours as he holds you tightly against him. “I just wish we had more time alone together,” he says, his voice suddenly serious.
“What do you mean?” you ask. 
“I mean, once we leave here it’s going to be different, you know? We’ll have the band, tour, media, friends, all of it. I just– I know it’s a lot to deal with. You’ve been around Josh and Clara, you know how it can be. I just– I want you around, but I don’t want that to scare you away.”
You smirk at him, “It’s not going to scare me away, Jake. I just want you to be really sure this is something you want to get into right now.”
He looks into your eyes, his expression serious. “I’m sure,” he says firmly. “I know it’s not going to be easy. I know there will be challenges. But I’m sure about you. About us.” He takes your face in his hands, his palms cupping your cheeks. “You’re all I want. Nothing else matters.”
You nod your head in his hand, pressing a kiss to his palm, “Okay, then I’m in if you are.”
His eyes soften as you kiss his palm, a smile spreading across his face. “I'm more than in,” he says, his voice low and gruff. “I don't want you to ever doubt that. I'm yours, sweetheart.” He pulls you closer, wrapping his arms around you tightly and holding you against him. “And I plan on showing you just how much I want you, every single day.”
“Well, everyday until tour starts back up, right?” you tease playfully. 
He laughs, shaking his head at your taunting, “Yeah, alright, smartass,” he grins, giving you a playful pinch on the side. He rolls over on top of you, his body pressing you down into the air mattress as he looks down at you with a smirk. “Don't worry, I'll make up for the lost time.”
“Oh, tempting…Maybe on a real bed? Not an air mattress?” you smirk. 
He chuckles, his eyes raking over your body, "Is this your way of asking me to take you home with me, sweetheart?" he grins.
“Unless you’d like a redo on my twin size,” you quip.
“Baby, have you ever been on a tour bus?” he giggles, pressing kisses to your neck.
You shake your head, laughing as his fingers tickle into your ribs, “No.”
“Mmm, you’re in for a real treat.” He grins down at you, his eyes glinting with desire. "Yeah, I think a real bed sounds like a good idea. And a real shower."
“A shower…” you breathe, the idea sounding desperately appealing. 
He laughs, noticing the way you react to the idea. “Yeah baby, a shower. A big, hot shower with actual water pressure. And a nice bed with sheets and blankets and the best feather pillows you’ve ever laid your head on.”
“Mhmm, maybe we should pack up now and get there immediately,” you giggle. 
“We should.” He presses his lips to yours again, warm as they linger there, “To be continued,” he says, pushing up off of the air mattress and stepping out into the sun. 
You spend the rest of the morning packing up the campsite, tearing down your tents and loading them into his car, sneaking glances at each other every few minutes. Jake works to organize everything into the small trunk, with the addition of your tent and Josh and Clara’s. You drain the cooler as he closes the trunk, dusting his hands off on his pants. “You ready, sweetheart?”
“Yep! Just this and we are all set,” you shout. 
He walks over to you, grabbing the cooler and walking it back to his car with you in tow. He opens the passenger side door for you, gesturing you inside, before joining you on the other side. 
“You know, I really am kind of sad to leave,” you laugh, “I never thought I would be saying that, but–”
“It’s a magical place,” he smiles, “S’why I come here so much.”
“Maybe we can come back?” you ask, tilting your head against the headrest. 
“Oh definitely,” he answers, “Whenever you want, sweetheart.” His hand comes to rest on your knee, his thumb stroking against your skin as he navigates the car out of the woods and back towards the road. You give him a warm smile, feeling the air conditioner bring chills to your skin. 
“Hey, I was um, I was serious about you coming home with me,” he says, taking his eyes off of the road to meet yours in a quick glance. 
“Oh, I mean, I would like that. If you’re really sure,” you answer nervously. 
He gives your thigh a gentle squeeze, a smile coming to his lips, “I’m really sure. I want to be with you as much as I can before I leave. Want you in my bed, my shower, the whole house really. All of it. I just want you.”
You blush, his words sending a shockwave through your system, “Okay.”
He grins widely, “Good.” He squeezes your thigh, his palm hot against your skin. “Should be home pretty quick, now.” 
“It is Sunday funday, right?” you giggle. “But, I guess that's kinda everyday for you, isn’t it?”
“Very funny,” he taunts, his expression growing serious, “But yes. It is,” he answers, grabbing your attention as you turn to look at him. He sends you a playful wink as he pats your thigh, letting out a deep breath that almost seemed like he was relieved. 
“Let me make you dinner tonight,” he says, keeping his stare focused on the overgrown highway. “Real dinner.”
“Oh, real dinner, huh?” you tease, placing your hand over top of his. “I feel like I vaguely remember hearing about you being a good cook, but I can’t remember for sure.”
He laughs, “What else have you heard about me, baby?”
Just as you go to answer his phone rings through the car speakers. You can see on the display that it is Josh calling him, and he glances to you before accepting the call. 
“What’s up?” he asks. 
“Dude, are you two alive? What the fuck is going on?” he asks, a tone of sarcasm in his voice. 
“Yeah we are alive. You know there’s no reception out there. Kinda the reason I go,” he says, hoping to jog his memory. 
“So you didn’t kill each other, that’s great news.” Josh says, and you can hear Clara laughing in the background.
Jake looks over at you, his eyes silently begging the question of if he should break the news to him. You take a minute to consider the risks but decide there really aren’t any. You nod eagerly at Jake, watching as he nods back in understanding. 
“Hey, uh, you two busy tonight?” he asks, his one hand gripping the steering wheel. 
“Not that I know of, why?” he answers. 
“Well, we are just now on our way back. Need to unload, shower, all that. How about you guys come over for dinner tonight? I’m cooking,” he says. You can sense the nerves in his tone, his face serious as he waits for Josh’s reply. 
“Um, yeah yeah that should be…good. You said we… Is… there a we?” he asks, his voice a little quieter. 
“Just come over tonight. Both of you. Just got some things to tell you,” he says, a smile pulling across his lips. 
A huff leaves his lips, “Things to tell me?”
“Hi Josh!” you say, speaking up on the call. 
“Holy shit, hey Y/N,” Josh answers, a hint of bewilderment in his voice. 
“See you tonight?” you ask, hearing him gasp in shock. You can hear him pull the phone away from his ear, doing his best to cover the microphone with his hand, “Holy fuck, Clara you were right. It happened,” he says in a mumbled mess. You know he did not intend for either of you to hear it, but you did.
“Josh?” Jake says, pulling him back to the call. 
“Yeah, yeah,” he says, clearing his throat, “Sorry, yeah– we will definitely be there.”
“See you tonight, Josh?” you ask, lacing your fingers with Jake’s, feeling his warm hand in yours. He leans over and kisses your cheek before settling back in his seat.
You listen to Josh laugh through the speakers, sighing as he speaks, “Yeah, I guess I will see you tonight.”
.
.
.
.
.
.
xo, N
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yanderes-galore · 3 months ago
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Hey there. Could you do a concept for Daemon + Rhaenyra sharing a maid darling? Thx
The funny thing is, this request was made before Season 2 came out. Now that Season 2 is out... I have more content to cover.
"He/She took the maid in the divorce...."
❗️Potential Spoilers Warning For HOTD Season 2❗️
Yandere! Daemon + Rhaenyra Sharing a Maid! Darling
Pairing: Romantic - Sharing/Rivalry
Possible Trigger Warnings: Female Darling, Obsession, Manipulation, Mentions of bedding, Mature themes (Violence and this gets a bit SPICY-), Possessive behavior, Infidelity mentioned on Daemon's part, Jealousy, Dubious relationship(s).
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I like to imagine at first the two can share.
Rhaenyra and Daemon are married as the queen and prince consort of Dragonstone.
Perhaps you were originally assigned to Rhaenyra as her handmaiden, a personal servant to the queen.
For the most part that's all your job is.
You tend to her every need as part of your duties, cleaning and preparing various things for the queen.
Most of your time is spent with the queen, but naturally you end up speaking to Daemon as part of your duties.
Now, Daemon is infamous when it comes to women.
While married to Rhaenyra, Daemon is notorious for pursuing pretty little maids.
You quickly become used to Daemon's insistent attempts at courting you.
What's probably more unexpected is... Rhaenyra expressing fondness towards her own handmaiden.
Based on one particular episode in Season 2 and a popular fan theory with Alicent, imagine if Rhaenyra's 'taste in women' occurs with her handmaiden.
At the start of their marriage at Dragonstone, I can see the pair slowly courting their handmaiden together.
It starts small, perhaps Rhaenyra testing out warm embraces with you in her private chambers while Daemon often tries to corner you with honeyed words.
Only for it to escalate to Rhaenyra kissing you out of sight from anyone else... or Daemon coaxing you to join him in the royal chambers when Rhaenyra isn't around.
The two enjoy their time with you away from one another, but occasionally I can see the two sharing and pursuing you together.
Such... affections become part of your duties.
The two royals clearly have a favorite maid and often love to smother her in affection.
For a maid you are quite spoiled...
Rhaenyra often picks out dresses that signify you're their maid... like a specific outfit that stands out from the usual servant attire.
Daemon often finds jewelry or accessories in general to add to how you look.
The two cover you in draconic designs, your attire often including dual dragon embroideries.
You're decorated in blacks and reds, you're never far from either of them.
Other servants have trouble speaking to you as one of their royals end up calling for your attention.
I can see them both keeping their favorite maid in their lap, peppering her with kisses and admiring how she's theirs.
You're never allowed off Dragonstone, especially when the Dance begins.
The two share well at first, often keeping you from speaking to any other lord or lady.
You are their royal maid, their personal servant...
Not another soul needs your attention.
There isn't many problems until their relationship gets worse.
Rhaenyra has expressed in the show that she knows she can't control Daemon or his actions, even as queen.
Daemon has also expressed defiance when he went to Harrenhal.
Safe to say... their marriage between each other gets rocky.
Which means the two get temperamental and your duties get harder.
I can see them both getting exasperated with one another.
Meaning you get to deal with two very stressed royals.
Daemon gets volatile and easily irritated when this happens.
You often witness the prince snap at Rhaenyra before storming off.
After fights he has a tendency to drag you off with him... tugging you with him to have you ease his irritation.
Other times Rhaenyra calls you, sitting you down to talk or hold you close.
When Daemon goes to Harrenhal, it feels like watching the two fight for... custody.
Rhaenyra is insistent on you staying at Dragonstone.
It's a safer place compared to Harrenhal and she really doesn't need her husband spontaneously pulling her maid along with him.
Meanwhile Daemon wants to bring you along because he doesn't want to be alone.
He has duty in Harrenhal, but might go insane if he doesn't have his maid.
Safe to say... They aren't sharing anymore.
Seeing them fight over you is... intimidating.
Your job becomes much harder now that the two are unwilling to share.
It doesn't help that the two both have dragons.
Rhaenyra has Syrax, Daemon has Caraxes.
Both are fearsome dragons.
So imagine if you do end up with one royal, only for the other to eventually land on their dragon to demand you.
Daemon could be losing his mind at Harrenhal, holding onto you as if he'll lose you, only for Rhaenyra to land on Syrax and demand you back against the warnings of her council.
Or the other way around, Daemon flies Caraxes to Dragonstone to have you in his arms to ease his mind.
Due to both of them being on edge, you just hope others around you are safe.
Daemon is more willing to cut someone if they touch you.
He'd probably snap and hold a dagger or his sword to their throat, telling them to back off before scooping you into his arms again.
Rhaenyra is less threatening... but does keep a strong grip on you if someone is getting on her nerves.
As the war continues and more blood is spilled, the two royals fight more for your attention.
I don't think they'd kill one another, such an issue would cause too much trouble for The Blacks.
While Rhaenyra is unable to control Daemon's impulses, she is an important part of the war.
For the most part they comply by passing you around with one another.
Your job isn't even being a maid at this point.
You're a companion, a little pet or toy they're fighting over.
Your job is no longer to clean or draw baths, it's to be held and warm their beds like some brothel woman.
Both royals refuse to give you up completely.
They aren't really sharing... it's more like tolerating...
You are the only thing that calms them...
But as the war goes on, who knows how long before one decides they won't tolerate it anymore.
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bitchimasnake-sss · 7 months ago
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i love from me to you sm! 😭 like it aimed directly to my heart 😭 you're so good at writing stuff so, here i am asking for a zoro!fic where reader hides that she got wounded during their last battle and zoro founds out and our poor moss head thought reader was gonna die so, he confessed (i just love flustered zoro) 😚 n e ways, continue writing the best stories!! lotsoflove! - glasses of nanamin
i feel like this is your second ask cause of the "n e ways" but lol, eitherways that's such a cute concept!! i would love love love this (i tweaked the prompt a little bit to fit it better, but i hope you like it it still)
got me losin' my cool ft. roronoa zoro!
set-up: as anon asked!! you get hurt during a fight and zoro almost has a mental breakdown haha live, laugh, love <3
warning: a bit of angst, zoro is a dumbass. otherwise, wholesome!
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roronoa zoro's feet pound against the earth and he was sure that with every leap he took, his heart sunk further under. his fingers were clammy. so very clammy against your soft skin. and he was sure the sweat dripping off his forehead and dropping onto your bloodied tank top was the last thing you wanted to see before you died.
"zo—" you rasped helplessly and your voice felt like graters against his skin. your chapped lips, almost closed eyes, the wound on your stomach and your week, blood-stained hand on it. he couldn't even bear to look at you without wanting to breakdown.
"stop talkin, please." he clenched his jaw tighter, the sound of teeth against teeth jarring. and although he refused to look down at you, cradled carefully in his arms, he could hear the desperate heaves that rocked your body.
he picked up the pace, ducking under hanging vines and leaping over overgrown roots of ancient trees carefully, so, as to not hurt you. the ship should be two minutes away, docked at the edge of the island and chopper must be there. and chopper would know what to do. how to help you.
zoro had to just deliver you to chopper.
but with his poor geographical skills, he felt like he had been running for the past thirty minutes without finding the ship. and he was certain the ship was docked only 10 minutes away from where the fight was taking place between the strawhat crew and a local pirate crew.
"zoro—" you started again.
why were you speaking? DID YOU WANT TO DIE?
"—don't use up your breath. please." he panted, feet still working to find the ship. where was that goddamn ship?
"that side—" you winced as you pointed your arm in the opposite direction. you coughed, wincing again before whispering, "the sunny."
zoro's head whipped around to look behind him. and at once, he changed the course. running as fast as he could, he soon found himself at the rocky beach the ship had been docked at.
"CHOPPER!" the swordsman bellowed for the mini doctor as he climbed up the ship. the reindeer was peering over the deck and when he looked at your nearly passed-out figure, he yelped in surprise.
"she got stabbed." zoro explained as he carried you inside to chopper's makeshift office/operation theater. laying you down gently, they both looked guilty as you groaned and clutched your own hand on the wound tighter.
"i need to apply some anti-septic, clean the wound and stitch it up." chopper stated, eerily calm in the heat of the moment. "here—" he gave zoro a sterilized cloth from his cupboard, "—apply it to her wound. put pressure on the area, i need to go make the anti-septic really quick."
"you have to make it? how long will that take?" if the swordman wasn't scared out of his wits, he would be surprised at how desperate he sounded.
"five minutes."
zoro looked at the reindeer wide-eyed. but the reindeer ran off, presumably to make the said medicine.
he looked back at you, putting the cloth to the wound and gently pushing down. he knew how to make the bleeding stop, he had done this multiple time. what he hadn't done multiple times was see you so lifeless, so incredibly overtaken by pain.
"hey." he found himself saying softly. softer than he had ever spoken before, "hey, can you look at me? hear me?"
you nodded slowly and relief washed over him. atleast you hadn't lost all cognitive senses.
"just focus on my voice, okay?" he knelt down so that he was on your eye-level from the bed. his other hand gingerly took ahold of yours. mindlessly, he rubbed soothing circles on your skin. he repeated, "just focus on my voice. yeah, close your eyes. i'm here okay?"
you found yourself closing your eyes, relying solely on the darkness of your eyelids and his voice to guide you to safety. his hand felt like a familiar weight against your stomach, the kind of touch that will renew a dead man and get him climbing back from his grave. his voice was sweet, too sweet to be even called his.
"i—" he paused, rubbing your skin with the pad of his thumb, "chopper's gonna fix you up, you know. h-he always does. i mean you're stronger than this. you'd survive, right?"
he's not sure if he meant to ask it as a question. he was sure he had said it to sound reassuring. but somewhere in between him uttering the words and you hearing them, they had turned into a desperate, desolate plea.
your chest fluttered underneath him, your breath strained. the face he adored slowly scrunched up from the pain. and he found himself talking even more.
"focus on me, okay? just me." he steeled his voice. and his nerves. "you'd be okay. you know, you always said you'd make me mochi, you never did. you said you'd make sake flavoured mochi. is that even a thing?" he laughed despite himself. it was barely a laugh. a pitiful scoff maybe? it was not the kind of laugh that would fool you.
"uh— once you get better." he pretended to ignore the way your body seemed to go slack under him. he repeated, "once you get better, i'm gonna convince franky to make us fireworks. you love those. and- and nami. i'd convince that money-hungry witch to lend me some money so that i can take you out. we will go shopping. you always said you—"
why were you so awfully quiet? usually, you'd talk to the point where he wanted to cut his ear off. now, he wanted to her you. he wanted to hear you call him a moss-head like sanji and he wanted you to laugh when he yelled at luffy for doing something stupid. and—
"—hey?" his voice pitched higher, "please wait, chopper will be back yeah?"
but you didn't even shake your head a weak yes. his shaky fingers reached out to look for your pulse on your neck. it was there. feeble, but there. but for how long?
how long till he lost you?
his throat was closing up, he couldn't breathe. his eyes burned and he was sure he was gonna mark your skin with his own from the way he held onto your wrist.
why won't you talk to him? call out his name, god fucking dammit. nobody called his name the way you did. as if you liked the syllables enough to make a home out of them. nobody smiled at him the way you did. so sweet, too sweet for him. you were everything. even though he was just another wrecked, broken boy with dreams too big for his mortal body, you were everything.
"please," he clutched onto you like a maddening bastard, "please. just hold on, okay?"
but bile seemed to crawl farther up his throat every time you didn't respond. not even a slight glance. not even the movement of a pinky. his fingers checked for your pulse. faint, but there.
and he couldn't hold his words back. he called out your name in a desperate effort to awaken you. water blurred his vision and he blinked it away. his throat was scratchy. too scratchy. and where was chopper?
"i love you." he finally confessed, not thinking much of his words than the fact that he just wanted you to hear them. "i love you so much. i have for so long. i-it wasn't supposed to be like this. i- i was gonna take you out to explore some island. i would have bought you food and called you an idiot when you smiled at me. then— then." he paused, "i would have told you i loved you. you would have said nothing back. and i would have loved even despite that."
he called out your name, sobs racking through his body like accursed symphonies.
"move." chopper was back, in his hand was a ceramic bowl with a green, gooey paste. "go out. i'd call you back, okay?"
if chopped noticed the state zoro was in, he simply chose not to dwell on it. and if zoro had any residual doubts for what kind of a doctor chopper was, he didn't dwell on them either. he caressed your hand one last time and stepped out.
⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚
the swordsman had been pacing around the deck. none of the members were back and it gnawed on his heart. what if they were hurt too? should he go back to see? but how could he leave chopper and you alone here? and what kind of a first mate was he if he cannot even save his own crew?
the world's greatest swordman be damned.
chopper stepped out and zoro looked at the doctor, frantic. chopper gave him a sigh and chased it with a smile, "she's okay."
zoro was not sure if it was the exhaustion, or the relief, or some other feeling his gut had concocted in him without asking. but he crashed down on his knees. his palms felt rough against his face and when he inhaled, he could smell dried blood on them.
"hey." chopper trotted towards him, keeping his paw on the green-haired man's shoulders, "she's okay, really. they missed any vital spots and she didn't lose a lot of blood. she will heal, okay?"
zoro couldn't do anything but just nod along. then, when he had the courage to look away from his hands. he looked at the doctor, finally muttering a faint "thank you."
the reindeer blushed at the compliment, "don't thank me. but you know, once she's better, you should tell her how you feel. this time maybe while she's conscious."
"chopper." the swordsman groaned.
the reindeer shrugged mechanically, "i won't tell anyone what i heard if you promise to take her out on that date."
after much deliberation— having to choose between humiliation at the hand of his crewmates when they discovered his crush or the humiliation from his crush when he finally confessed— he finally gave in. after all, humiliation from one was better than humiliation from seven. especially that fucking cook.
"fine." he grumbled, "i'd take her out."
⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚
it had been two weeks since you were stabbed. well, you didn't talk to anyone about it, really. but when you drifted off into the wicked embrace of sleep, you would be plagued by the memories. and well, a confession.
it's not like you were pretending to be dead!! your body had simply given up. it was exhausted from the fighting and the not-dying. so, when you were laid on chopper's bed to be patched up, your body had gone slack. but just because your body had gone slack doesn't mean you weren't awake.
it had been two weeks and you hadn't told the green-haired asshole what you had heard. why? maybe cause you thought he would make the first move. or maybe because you weren't quite sure if he actually said those things or if you hallucinated it to dilute the pain.
eitherways, seemed like things between you and the mosshead were the same as they were before the incident. and you were really starting to consider the hallucination excuse. but then—
"hey." zoro quipped up as he came to stand beside you. it was cloudy today, the grey skies churning in anticipation of a storm. the winds were unkind and the sea was malevolent. beautiful nonetheless.
"oh hey." you turned and gave him a small smile. you shifted from one feet to another, pretending as if you weren't terrified of the route this conversation might take, "whats up?"
"uh—" he looked back for a spilt-second and you saw— from the corner of your eyes— chopper hidden behind a bunch of boxes, giving zoro his best death glare. zoro sighed, "so, uh, this is random, i think? but when we dock on the next island tomorrow morning. do like... do you want to go see some new sword-cleaning equipment with me?"
you shouldn't have laughed. but you did.
"what's funny?!" his eyes widened and his cheeks were dusted pink.
"no-nothing." you heaved, closing your eyes. "that's the best excuse you could come up with? sword cleaning equipment?"
"what do you mean 'excuse'? i need some equipment!"
"zoro." you forced open your eyes, your smile still frozen over your lips, "if you want to go out on a date with me, you should say that okay?"
his ears went red and he looked away. you were sure if the weather was quiet, you could hear his heart picking up the pace. clearing his throat, he finally asked, "who told you? chopper?"
"no, dummy." you reached your hand out, taking his calloused palm in yours. your thumb rubbed familiar patterns on his hand, "you did."
"me?" he snapped to look back at you, "me?"
you just gave him a grin, "this reminds me, i did promise you i'd try making sake flavoured mochi. i never did. but again, you said you'd ask frankie to make us fireworks and we're still firework-less. but hey, i forgive you if you forgive me okay?"
his head could have burst open from the sheer pressure on his brain but you continued, "but eitherways, what i really mean is that if you said i love you." you stepped a bit closer, "i'd say i love you too."
your hand let go of his and you chose to walk away, leaving him dumbfounded. when his senses came to him, he ran upto you, "YOU HEARD THAT ALL?!"
"all of it."
"ugh."
"heh, it was kinda cute."
"i thought you were dying, woman."
"in a way, we all already are."
"have you been hanging out with robin too much? god, kill me."
"god doesn't need to. you're already dying."
"i want to die faster."
you took his hand back in yours and pulled him towards yourself. pecking his cheek, you said, "no. we still have to go on that date. i mean, if you ever actually ask me."
the flustered mess that was rorononoa zoro just sighed. accepting his fate, he asked, "well, do you wanna go on that date or what?"
you snickered, "i'll think about it"
"do you live to annoy me?"
"maybe. but you love meee."
"i might change my mind after this."
but despite his words, his fingers stayed gently intertwined with yours. hey, maybe getting stabbed in the stomach wasn't all that bad? (jk, it was very very bad)
a/n: i love writing stoic men are flustered little guys lmaoo. hopefully y'all like this? i've been writing a lot of fluff/semi-angst lately. i wanna write some nsfw content but im so out of ideas. send reqs if you guys have anything in mind!!
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semischarmed · 5 months ago
Text
Hunter
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In all aspects but his hobby, Hunter was an all around normal guy. Your interactions with the man in Apartment 1B are few and far between, but you did know a few things. You knew he used to play college football. You knew he liked to go the gym every night- 6pm on the dot. You knew he came from a small rural town in the Midwest. But above all, you knew you wanted his delectable flesh all to yourself. 
Hunter liked to go out on weekends. Usually fishing. He seemed to also have a penchant for catching and releasing snakes. Why anyone would do such a thing felt like such a foreign concept to you, but it did spark a particularly devious idea.
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You feign interest, listening to Hunter drone on and on about his latest trip. You did like the way his eyes beamed whenever he talked about his interests, but as far as you were concerned, the biggest catch of all was Hunter himself.
Now came the time to strike. “Damn, that actually sounds really fun... No one ever taught me to fish.” That seemed to have shocked him to his core. You shrug. “No one ever took me”. Hunter was eating it up.
“We should go fishing! Next week. I have some extra gear with me, maybe you could get some bait?” He exclaimed in boyish excitement. It was almost cute- and to be honest it turned you on a little, knowing the real purpose of the trip.
The trap was set.
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- - - - - 
You eye the bucket of live bait in front of you. A mass of worms wriggling in a plastic container. Right below was a series of strange symbols in a circle of red ink. You stare at the large cut on your hand, before giving it a squeeze over the worms. To your right is a nondescript black book, you read its words as you continue to squeeze, watching the bait seize on contact and appear to die. You hastily bandage your hand. 
You’re not too concerned about any infections, since you knew this would be a one-way trip for the both of you. You pull up a photo of Hunter as you start to chant the next paragraph of words, pumping your dick with your non-injured hand. Because it’s a photo of Hunter, and because you can still distinctly remember his decadent musk from the night before, it doesn’t take long.
You let out an exasperated sigh as your seed begins to coat the bait. It doesn’t take long before the worms begin to wriggle again, now slick with cum and imbued with a piece of you. You moan as you feel each animal as an extension of yourself. You ball your hand into a fist and the worms respond in kind. Perfect. 
- - - - -
You can’t control your sheer horniness. The lake is quiet, aside from the soft sounds of wildlife and, as far as you can tell, it was just you and Hunter for miles. The sun beats down, drawing scents out of Hunter that felt downright divine.
“Told you I knew a spot,” Hunter beams, obviously proud of his secret fishing spot.
He eyes the live bait, pondering on it for a second. You can practically see the gears in his head try to reconcile why a seemingly innocuous pile of worms felt so inherently wrong and otherworldly. He shakes the feeling as you both enter the boat, gear in hand.
The boat sways a bit as you two drift further and further from shore. Your original plan was to draw it out, make it look less intentional, but every moment outside of Hunter felt like a waste.
“Wow, I never realized how rocky these boats w- AAahhh” you scream, as you “accidentally” spill the bait all over Hunter. “Sorry!” It takes all your willpower to not get hard at the sight of Hunter unknowingly covered in pieces of yourself, soaked in your cum.
Ever the cool guy, Hunter laughs off your faked-clumsiness. Though obviously a bit disturbed. “It’s alright, can’t go fishing and not expect to get a little dirt- OOoohhh Ah!” Hunter’s back arches as he feels a cum-soaked worm slip between his clothing and travel down his spine. You order the rest of the worms to follow suit, finding any opening, any crevice to invade.
Hunter starts shaking and screeching, gesturing at you to steer the boat back to shore.
You keep the ruse, steering the skiff into a small island in the middle of the lake. As soon as you make your emergency docking, Hunter is running out of the boat attempting to shake off the worms. Somehow, he is able to catch your first worm before it can slip into his ass crack. “Fuck!” He screams as he stomps on it. That ticks you off.
As he jerks back and forth, you feel a few more parts of yourself shaken off. He can still feel the rest of your bits slipping and sliding beneath his clothes so he starts stripping as well. At last, you feel one worm slip through. 
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He whimpers as he feels a cum-coated worm start to enter his piss slit. As you will it to go through, you can’t help but moan. It was an intrusion of the highest order, and feeling some of his seed mix with yours was pure euphoria. His face flashes to you in horror before he too moans involuntarily. It must have been a uniquely violating experience. To add to the confusion that must have been plaguing his mind, you start to strip down as well. He’s in full shock now, unable to stammer out any response. You use those precious moments to ram him into the ground, jamming a handful of worms right into his screaming mouth. 
The small tussle leads to a few cuts on his otherwise perfect flesh, but you capitalize on the opportunity and will the worms he shook off earlier back into his body through these makeshift orifices. You watch Hunter’s face go beet red, neck veins enlarging in struggle, as a giant mass of you floods into his screaming mouth. He manages to regurgitate a good amount, but enough of you is already inside. Before he can shake your main body off, his hips buck forward, hands grabbing his own ass in shock. More worms burrowing into him. This time, from behind. You make sure these pieces of yourself stimulate his g-spot, leaving him bound to inaction by senseless pleasure. You pin his grimy, convulsing body with the weight of yours, relying mostly on the sensory overload to lock him in place as you claim your hunt. 
Hunter’s breaths are hot, damp and shallow with struggle. You take this moment of preoccupation to take an early taste, bringing your lips over his. One of your worms already deep in his flesh stimulates a few nerves, forcing him to reciprocate. More slip in between muscle tendons, willing his arms into a loving embrace. He’s seething, as he feels his own flesh pulling you two closer. The corners of his lips tremble, fighting the commands you inundate them with. Resistance wanes, as he feels his face pull into a seductive smile. It’s entirely out of character and he feels the sheer wrongness in the personality you force him to wear.
“T-told you I could teach you to fish,” he speaks in velvet, winking before leaning in for a kiss. Hunter’s surprisingly soft lips slowly part yours, and you feel his tongue slip into your mouth. 
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His eyes seared with rage, but his face reflected a completely different emotion. You make him pull the most obscene smile you can sculpt with your control over his facial muscles. His tongue retracts, eyes briefly showing relief before it reenters in a more forceful manner. You stifle a moan.
Hunter shivers slightly, rubbing more of his sweat over you, as you make him shake off another attempt to reassert control. He was not going to ruin this. His smile widens as his tongue gently swirls in your mouth, coating you with his saliva and bombarding you with his taste. It then wrestles yours, briefing locking your two forms into one. With the smuggest grin you can squeeze out of him, you make him breathe into you, and you into him. His lips moving make yours move as well, though the words he is forced to speak were yours to begin with. “Fuck yeah,” he moans loudly into your mouth. You feel his deep voice reverberate into your mouth, down your throat where it resonates outward. It practically feels like he’s speaking through you. You can’t help but cum, basting more of his flesh with your seed. That sets him off enough to rip away from the extended kiss, spitting revulsion at your face.
You lick your mouth clean. Waste not, want not. Besides, Hunter tastes delicious. He is able to struggle again, rebellion renewed by the sheer horror at his brief glimpse of his future as your puppet.
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You feel command waning. You try to rile yourself up in opposing anger, but you can’t help but admit the push and pull turned you on a little. Besides, to have the strength and will able to fight off all the sensations of your wriggling mass entering every port in his body at once only made you want Hunter more.
Feeling your hardening dick press upon him only served to anger the thrashing man further. You sync with your worms, commanding the wriggling mass to move in tandem. In every second of control, you make him play with your bodies, forcing him to grab your hips and center your main body above him grind into you from below. Fuck. You moan.
To be so new to his body, you lack the finesse to control your new vessel fully, so Hunter’s movements are downright vulgar. He grabs your ass with a dominating grip, pulling into a nasty smirk while licking his lips. “Make me yours.” Instantly, his demeanor changes as he fights off your control again. His hands grip dirt, clawing in agony as he tries to get his bearings. Slowly but surely, you feel the dance of authority between you two slow, as your worms settle into more efficient positions in his body. This time, it’s Hunter who’s body grabs a handful of your remaining worms, and, with the biggest shit-eating smile you can get out of him, stuffs his mouth full of it. 
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Most of the worms are now safely tucked inside your new home, so you ease up on Hunter. He looks to you in rage as he continues choking, as his muscled arms and legs flail useless, and as your worms find crevices inside of Hunter to slink into. Now, he too can feel how deep into his being these pieces of you are going, so he starts hyperventilating. That just turns you on even more, feeling those powerful lungs of his heave. You couldn’t wait for these to be fully yours to play with.
His body trembles as he tries in vain to stop his kind face from contorting into another lewd smile. Seeing him as your puppet? Watching his flesh defile itself- feeling Hunter do it with your smile shining through? It’s enough to get your new jockbound dick instantly hard. You drool at the sight of Hunter’s enlarging dick. “Complete me,” he moans.
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You start by hijacking his genetic material. Your wormy mass is quick. It wriggles deep into his crotch. His body grunts as his hands grasps at his own flesh. ‘Something is wrong’, He feels his body telling him. At least, even more wrong than you had already made it. And something was indeed wrong. You were not content in having, binding, commanding Hunter’s form. You wanted more. 
His face winces in pain as he feels his own brain memories recall his memories for you.
It was nice day in the park with his parents. The warmth of the sun and the light breeze framed the idyllic memory. Then you make him taint it. “Fuck yeah.” It pains his brain to continue, but you press on. “Can’t believe those two bred all this… I’m getting hot just thinking about it.” His face twitches until he is ultimately forced to lick his lips. “Get nice a strong, lil me. Build up those muscles so we can be the perfect puppet for him.” At that, Hunter recoils at feeling his own flesh generate pleasure from the thought you make him have. “I’m your perfect muscle sleeve. Use me.” He gagged as his own younger self in his memory anachronistically replied back. “Hell yeah, can’t fucking wait to be worn.”
Totality. You wanted it all. Past. Present. Future. You force his mind to linger on that last point before a payload of your worms burrow into his balls.
Instantly, you gorge the bits of yourself inside him on his seed. Squeezing each writhing worm into them. Outside Hunter’s body, your main body gasps. Mmmm. Strong genes. You make Hunter’s own hands dance across his flesh, fondling himself inappropriately. His insides fared no better. Hunter’s baby batter factory had been hijacked. Fully controlled. Fully infested. Fully yours. Your wriggling mass is no longer thin. They’ve been enhanced. Imbued with Hunter’s strength. Inlaid with your perversion. You feel them start to expand to their true size and form so you will them to spread throughout Hunter’s body and recondense. His tough muscle and flesh provides enough pressure to keep your new offspring together in a manageable size, just barely.
The next few moments are intense. You immediately back from the heat. Hunter whimpers as he collapses. Body twitching in odd places, skin bulging and then receding as your “offspring” together churn inside him. They find more areas to settle into. This time, Hunter is whining for a different reason. His body was not fighting the intrusion at all. That makes your dick stir. You feel his own seed coating your worms like your own personal Trojan horse. They easily slip into the cores of his muscles, cores of neurons. He tries to will his body into a fight but it’s useless. Betrayal and frustration. You feel these thoughts course in Hunter’s mind. He’s yours.
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You can now feel every neuron, every cell and fiber of Hunter’s being scream and fight as you force him to speak his next words. He wraps you in a big bear hug, dousing you in his testosterone-laden sweat. In the sultriest voice you can force out of his vocal cords, Hunter looks to you with a convincingly earnest stare. “I want you to be my boyfriend”. 
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= = = = =
The people have spoken and they want “naughty”, I may still work up the “nice” one, at some point.
There’s more parts to this one, but it’s already a bit long.
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itsgrimeytime · 7 months ago
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when someone yells at you... || Rick Grimes (TWD)
rick grimes taglist: @golden-hoax @mgparker
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"That was all your goddamn fault!"
And maybe it was just because you were tired, but something in you agreed with him -you knew you could do better than this.
"Look, okay, I'm sorry-" you tried -something weak and shaky in your tone (you were exhausted and all they were saying was making all of the noise in your head louder), "-I never meant to-"
"Fuck that," he hissed, "-you almost got us all killed with that fucking mistake. Don't you get that?!"
"It was just-" you started, slowly -words trying to come out properly.
"Just shut the fu-"
"What the hell is goin' on 'ere?" a voice boomed -southern drawl emphasized and tone unshaken: Rick Grimes.
He stepped in between the two of you.
You were exhausted, hands coming up to rub at your temples. Eyes were getting a little foggy and your lip was trembling, you couldn't falter. It could only make you lose respect in the grand scheme of things. You took a deep breath in.
"'Ey fucked up the whole run," the person explained, and you shrunk into yourself more, "-gave one wrong order, and fucking Nancy almost bit the goddamn bullet, Rick."
Rick just stared at him -something heavy in his gaze.
"You must not know shit 'bout this world," Rick scoffed, and you could see the slow steps of him approaching the man -you couldn't even remember his name, "-but every win 'ere's a hundred damn loses. Judgin' one person for a mistake, ya see, just ain't fuckin' wise."
"Somebody almost died, Rick," the man countered, "-don't you care about your people? Or have you lost that side of yourself too?"
Rick rushed forward then, grabbing the guy by his collar and raising him into the air. Your heart jolted into your throat.
"I'll feed you to the fuckin' walkers if ya keep talkin' like that."
The man seemed to falter, but you saw a gleam in Rick's eye. A dangerous gleam.
The group was already rocky as is, Rick didn't need to lose any respect. He didn't need to string out the dynamic further. One move and it'd tip.
"Rick," you insisted -hands wringing out in front of your chest, and his eyes almost immediately flashed to you, "-it's not worth it."
He seemed to lighten then, scanning over you. Maybe taking in your hands, or your hunched shoulders, or your blurry eyes. It was like his priorities switched, completely focused on you.
He let out a long sigh, dropping the man to the ground -he fumbled a little with his footing, "'Ey saved your life, remember 'at."
The man seemed shaken, swallowing thickly and blinking like he was trying to center himself. Rick merely focused entirely on you, heavy footfall bringing him right in front of you.
"Ya okay?" He spoke, soft and sweet -such a drastic difference from before that it made your head spin a little.
"I'm..." you echoed out, a little pathetically, "-I'm just exhausted, and being berated at like that doesn't really help."
Rick frowned, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and guiding you elsewhere -voice low just for you, "C'mon, let's talk somewhere else."
"I'm just tired," you offered but it was weak, and he didn't seem at all moved by it, or even convinced.
He pulled you into his house, off the Alexandria streets -it was strangely empty. No Judith or Carl, and you briefly wondered where they were.
"Sit," he motioned to the couch.
You paused for a moment, "Rick, you don't have to do this-"
"Sit," he repeated.
You silently found yourself a spot, leaning into the arm of it -Rick joined you, barely a breath away. You weren't sure how to react. You were never really sure with Rick.
"If anybody pulls 'at shit again," he suddenly said -blue eyes solid as steel, "-you tell me, okay?"
"Rick-"
"No," he spoke, so solidly it made your voice stutter to a stop, "-nobody talks to ya 'at way and fuckin' gets away wit' it. Ya hear me?"
"Yeah, okay," you responded -softer, "-I get it."
"I don't mean to be-" he paused, turning to you with a much softer glance -blue eyes warm, "-look, Y/N. I really care about ya, and if somebody says shit 'bout you. They might as well be sayin' shit 'bout me."
"They weren't talking shit, Rick," you exhaled, and something in your voice shook, "-I fucked up. Bad."
"'At's not-" he sighed, scooting closer to you and with a solid breath taking your hand in his, "-Everybody fucks up, ain't no reason to dwell on it. Ain't no reason to yell 'bout it like he was."
"He just got scared."
"Everyone's fuckin' scared, sweetheart," he countered, gruff voice in a low whisper, "-Gives 'im no goddamn excuse to yell at ya like 'at."
You frowned, shakingly wiping at your eyes.
"And, 's important to let go of things," he hummed, squeezing his hand around yours, "-ya just gotta remember nobody got hurt. If ya don't, you're only gonna run yourself into the ground."
You were quiet for a moment, eyes swimming over your connected hands thoughtfully. They darted to his, who were already looking at you -something you didn't quite recognize shining in his eyes. There was something there you couldn't quite read -something different. You just did what felt right.
"Thanks," you said quietly -it was all you could say, moving your head to his shoulder.
"Don't-" he hummed, you could feel the grumble in his chest -arm coming to wrap around your side, "-Ya don't 'ave to thank me."
You stayed in the silence of the moment, absorbing the air. All of this... new, it sunk into your skin. Your nose filled with the woodsy scent that you knew to be just Rick, and you had a spare thought.
Maybe this could happen again, but you knew Rick would be there. Maybe that makes it okay. It does... With Rick, it's okay.
"Yeah," you responded -maybe a little fondly, "-I do."
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igotanidea · 2 years ago
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Home : bat!family x bat!sister
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Summary: no one gets to offend my siblings and father. No one but me. I'll make sure of it.
***
Maybe it was a bad idea to apply for that Erasmus program and leave her brothers and adoptive father alone for whole three months. Sure, studying abroad, expanding knowledge, learning language and customs was an amazing experience, but it came with the cost. The price of being in fear that her family would get themselves in trouble, pain, fight they could not recover from.
The first two weeks of her adventure was the worst, since she was waking up at most random night hours, ready to jump into fight, those vigilantes instincts and habits kicking in.
Those were the nights when she was turning and tossing in her bed unable to close an eye and in result sneaking out her dorm room and walk around the campus like the ghost. The quietness and peacefulness of her surroundings at the academy were so different from those she knew in Gotham, it was almost disturbing.
There was no denying that Y/N was the smartest in the family, even Tim admitted it once (obviously not while talking to her, but she overheard his conversation with Bernard) but at times like this she was second-guessing her choices.
Due to her specific upbringing and family background she also never managed to form any deep connection with her fellow students, preferring to stay by herself, focus on the task and putting a lot of work into expanding her knowledge and skills in technology. She never complained, but from other people’s perspective she was an eremite. Kind, polite with perfect manners when someone asked her for something or while working in group, but still highly reserved. Just like her adoptive father, whose relation to she was trying to keep a secret. And it worked up to the day when one of the lecturers accidentally called her  “Miss  Wayne” in front of the whole class. The second he did it the air in the auditorium froze. She might have been in different country, but for God’s sake she was studying technology, of course everyone heard about the Wayne Enterprises and the  Bruce Wayne.
“You’re his daughter?” one of the boys in the lower row turned around and eyed her suspiciously
“Yes. Adoptive one.”
“Of course. He’s well known for taking kids in, right? Seems like some sort of complex or maybe even a disease” he smirked and it made the girl clench her fist. Her relationship with Bruce might have been rocky, but no one except her and her brothers were allowed to judge and offend him.”
“Care to elaborate on that?” she hissed, eyeing the guy with ice cold gaze
“Miss Y/L/N! Mister Olsen! Please calm down and sit down!” the teacher tried to make up for his mistake but it was far too late for that.
“You misspelled my name once, might as well keep calling me Wayne now.”  the tone of her voice matched the gaze. She was not going to let the guy easily, but getting in trouble with the dean was not a part of her plan. “Now, can we continue with the lecture? I don’t know about anyone else in her, but speaking for myself I would love to actually learn something useful.”
***
Y/N was the middle child. Younger than Dick and Jason, older than Tim and Damian which placed her literally halfway  in the family. Because of that she was a mix of responsibility and carelessness, doing her own thing, not always the right way, but still capable of getting away with a lot more than the others. Not as family oriented as Dick, feeling a bit overshadowed by Jason, highly competitive with Tim and more independent and individualistic than Damian. Still, even despite her “boss bitch” attitude, she was sandwiched between her brothers which made her the best negotiator and mediator in the family. Y/N also had a strong sense of fairness and morality and would always try her best to do the right things. Objectively, not subjectively. And making fun of her family was not one the things she could forget. However, before taking any action she had to gather intel, figure out what the guy knew and then come right at him.
***
Waiting till the end of the class was probably the greatest torture she ever had to endure, every minute stretching into infinity and when it was over the sense of relief almost made her drop the plan. Almost.
“I’m not done with you, Olsen.” she was faster to the door, stopping her potential victim from getting away.
“You want more, Wayne?”
“Please. Hit me with your best shot. What is your problem with my family, exactly?”
“Let me think” he tapped his chin. “There are so many. Like for instance, your oldest brother. What was his name again? Oh, right! Dick. Suits him quite well, doesn’t it. A prick, if you ask me. Definitely a show-off with no skills.” He scoffed “Shall I continue?”
“ Please. You got like three more people to gossip about.”
“The second in line, Jason, right? Oh, the unhinged  one. Violent, mocking, thinking he is better than anyone else around, when in reality he’s just a lost, scared child. Probably a dumbass too.”
“Pretty sure he would agree with that. Now what about Tim and Damian?”
At this point Olsen was getting a bit surprised that the girl in front of him was still unfazed. Her calmness, a sign of silent inside fury making him slightly uncomfortable.   Not enough to stop however.
“Drake…..” the name rolled of his tongue while the boy was wondering what words to choose “oh, he’s the gay one, right? Such a shame that the renowned Wayne family has someone like that as a member. Bet your father would never take him in, if he knew. A fairy becoming the next CEO of his renowned company. How ironic!”
“Hm.” Oh, Y/N was so much like Bruce at times and it showed in the least expected moments.
Damn that girl! How could it not make her angry?
“And …… Damian, the only biological child. Absolutely maladjusted and unaware of social norms and boundaries. Tell me, how was it like to have your youngest brother violate your boundaries and personal space?”
“It was. ….educatory. Just like it was with everything you just said. You presented yourself as someone with some serious psychological issues and possibly an unhealthy interest in my family’s life. So thank you, it truly was illuminating.”
***
“What the hell did you do Y/N?” a very alerted Dick appeared  on the other side of the screen
“I have no idea what you are talking about.” The girl sighted and fell onto the cushions bringing the computer onto her lap to see her brother better
“Don’t lie to me now, sis.”
“I wouldn’t even dream of it.”
“Bruce has been on the phone for the last fifteen minutes and from what I figured it’s about something that happened on the campus.”
“The only thing happening on the campus are students who skip classes.” She mumbled “maybe except that one time when one of the boys lost some stupid bet and blew up the fountain as some sort of punishment. That was funny.”
A little grunt was heard on Dick’s side and for a second he disappeared from the screen.
“Dick?”
“Sorry, I had a little interruption.” He rubbed his forehead “Now, back onto what you did…..”
“Did you say that someone blew the fountain?” third face appeared on the screen in the corner, taking over the conversation.
“Hello, Jason.”
“Hi sis. Maybe I should have joined you in your academic career. Seems like you have a lot of fun there. Besides, I never really finished school, since you know…. I died.”
“We know.” Y/N and Dick said in unison
“Always a good opportunity to remind you, right?” he grinned “Now, sis, tell me, how was it going full rogue on fellow student? I gotta admit I’m proud of you here.”
“So that’s what this is about?” Dick’s eyes grew wider than ever “I;m gonna ask you once again, Y/N. what did you do?”
“Nothing permanent.”
“What…..?”
“Cut her some slack, Grayson.”
“Look who decided to join us.” Y/N smirked “improved your computer skills much, Damian?”
“I got tired of being left out.”
“Since when do you care about the group?”
“Leverage, sis. Knowledge is power, I thought you knew that.”
“Ok, that is enough!” Dick finally lost his patience “I’m trying to have a conversation with my little sis here. Both of you, get out of the line!”
“Mhm, keep dreamin’ Dickhead.”
“For once I agree with Todd.”
“You have no right to…..”
“Guys…..” Y/N tried to mitigate them, but deep inside she enjoyed their bantering. It was a while since she experienced it and only now realized how familiar it was.
“I was here first!” Dick yelled “And I’m the oldest”
“No one cares Grayson! You are a Bludhaven resident now.  Just because you visit the manor does not mean you can keep Y/N busy using the wayne’s devices!”
“Don’t you have someone to kill in the crime alley, Jay?”
“Unlike you, I succeeded in all my latest missions.”
“Is that what you call coming back to your safe house bloodied and injured. You were on the verge of death!” Damian smirked “you were absolutely inept, that’s not a success.”
“You were what, now?!” Y/N shrieked. Her second oldest brother was sometimes too careless.
“It was not that bad, Y/N, I swear. And how the fuck do you know about it, demon?”
“I have my ways.”
“I would suspect Drake of spying on me, but you?”
“Speaking of the devil, I’m surprised Tim hasn’t already join us.” Dick muttered
“Oh, he did.” Y/N pointed out
“WHAT?” her brothers cried. Now there was another one fighting for her attention and it was not a secret that Tim was her favorite making the situation harder.
“I did.” Tim chuckled  “Well, to tell the truth Y/N let me in the channel. We have our ways with technology. Something none of you could ever fully understand. “
“Of course not….”
“Cheer up, Dami. You can’t monopolize all the areas.”
“I would beg to differ.”
“Ok, everyone hold up here. I think we lost the point of the conversation. The thing was that Bruce was on the phone, probably taking to the dean about….”
“Y/N played a little prank on her classmate, is that right?” of course Tim was the one who everything best.
 “He deserved it.”
“Y/n…..”
“Stop using the big brother voice on me! It’s not going to work!”
“How about we use Damian’s youngest one?” Dick teased
“I refuse to be used in this….”
“SHUT UP DAMIAN!” Dick and Jason shouted together and shared a murderous look between one another. Now they were both desperate to find out what happened since Tim would rather die than spill the bean. It was infuriating. They were the older brothers! This had to mean something.
“Ok, that’s it.” Damian stood up and the view of the empty chair in the place where his face should be was highly disturbing.
“That is not good.” Y/N said out loud something that all of them already knew. Her presumptions turned out to be right a second later when the shouting and yelling reverberated through the speakers and a blur of black and green rushed into Dick’s room.
“hey, I want to join the fight too!” Jason started up and with a speed, Wally West could be jealous of involved in the mix of limbs and screams.
“Wait! I though Dick was in Bludhaven! Tim?”
“Not today. We’re all in the manor.”
“And you idiots were talking to me through four different computers?”
“Are you actually surprised?”
“On second thought, not at all.” She sighed. It’s a good thing you are the reasonable one here…..”
“There you are, Timmy” now the situation has turned as it was Dick who appeared in the door of Tim’s bedroom “you are not  getting out of this. If you want Y/n to yourself you have to fight me.”
“And me!” Jason tackled Dick to the ground with a loud thump
“Losers!” Damian jumped over their bodies and came right at Tim
Because of their actions, Y/N was the only one who noticed two men stepping from the shadows and exchanging some words. Apparently Bruce wasn’t capable of putting the boys in their places and asked Alfred to try this instead. And a single grunt from the butler did a miracle as all of them stood up and started explaining and apologizing. Funny as it was, Y/N knew that with Bruce’s arrival she was heading straight towards preaching from her father.
“Y/N.”
“Hello Bruce.”
“Did you break his arm?”
“You broke his arm?” Dick was halfway out but turned back immediately
“No.” Y/n shook her head “I broke his arm and hurt his legs.”
“Don’t forget that you also demolished his dorm room.”
“That wasn’t me. That was….”
“Did you go at him as a vigilante? Wow! Way to go, sis. Now I truly am proud of you.”
“Ok, both of you, out!” Bruce lost the rest of his patience pushing Dick and Jay away. “Now that we are alone…….” he sighed deeply closing the door tight  
“I;m not sorry.”
“Oh, I know. And I’m not mad, because I’m sure you had a reason to do it. So tell me, why?”
“you…. you want to know ?”
“Of course. Look Y/n, I’m aware I won’t get  a father of the year cup from you, but I care all right? Did that boy hurt you and you took retaliation? Just tell me….”
“He was talking shit about our family.”
“And you felt the urge to protect the Wayne’s honor?” Bruce smirked “this is so not like you.”
“Honor, my ass. We’ve lost that ages ago, Bruce. The only thing I was protecting was my sole privilege of mocking you. No one else is allowed to do it.”
“I’ll be sure not to tell your brothers that you miss them. “
“That would be most welcome.”
“And you have to know that we don’t miss you either, y/n.” father and daughter’s gazes met and they both nodded in silent agreement, right corners of their mouths lifting almost unnoticeable. “You coming to visit next week?”
***
Something was wrong.
Something was terribly wrong and that tingling sensation became unbearable the second she climbed the manor’s stairs and reach for the doorknob with a heartrate so fast it would send anyone else straight into cardiac arrest. Y/N however kept her cold blood, focusing on what may happened inside and considering her options and strategies for a potential fight.
She could not expect  that the moment she opened the door four figures would jump out from the shadows making the noise that would bring the dead from behind the grave. It startled her and as a result she stumbled back, hitting the wardrobe and making it shake. She could not expect that on said wardrobe there would be packets and packets of paint and that those would fall down straight on her making her look like some abstractionism painting.
“I hate you all.” She muttered while her brothers run away in four different directions.
“Welcome home, miss Y/N” Alfred approached her with a tissue so she could at least wipe the paint from her eyes.
“Home.” She whispered “Yes, it definitely feels like it.”
It was good to be back.
But she was still going after them. .....
Later. When they would least expect it.
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Text
How 'bout I stay here and you fight? 
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Pairing: König x Reader
Summary: You’re determined to find out why everyone thinks König is so scary, afterall he’s just some guy that’s taller than most people right? He’s probably harmless! Well, he’s a little scary, but you still like him anyway.
(No use of y/n or mention of gender/race)
AN: Let me start off by saying I'm sooo sorry for the time it took me to update this, I know that it's been quite a gap since the last upload. Hopefully the wait was worth it though, because I have written about 30 pages for you here, so there's lots to sink your teeth into! As always, thanks for all your support and interaction and all the questions you have about the series, having everyone's lovely messages and art means a lot 💕 knowing I have this community to come back to while I stress out about life stuff is amazing, so thanks for being there! Enjoy the next update ☺️
Part 8 of A Rocky Start - Full Masterlist Here
-☠️-
“Ghost before you-”
“Before I what, Sneak?” Ghost spat, shaking with the effort it took to contain himself. “Before I tell Price? Before I jump to conclusions? What? You gonna try and tell me those aren’t what I think they are? Are you going to keep lying to me? Well go on then, tell me what you think I want to hear, Sneak. It’s what you’ve been doing this whole time isn’t it! You selfish little lying fuck.”
“No! I never wanted to lie to you Ghost, I just-”
“You never wanted to lie to me? Yet, you let me believe that König had screwed you over that day in the gym. Mustn't have been some cheap lay by the looks of things, that must have been you that clawed up his back like that! And to think all this time, I thought better of you,” he snorted, pounding the wall next to you with his gloved palm. “You made us look like idiots running around after you, trying to make you feel better all this time! You’ve had us all concerned about you while you’ve been fucking that cunt behind our backs!”
You whimpered and shrunk into the cold plaster at your back, distantly feeling like you were lying on a slab at a morgue. Everything in you said that it wasn’t long until you were going to be meeting your end. Ghost was wide eyed and loud as a lion as he tore into you, now slapping both his hands on the wall and sandwiching you firmly between him and it. You gulped and clenched your fists, trying to swallow the burning feeling that crept up your throat like a trail of gasoline. Everything was falling apart and you couldn't even see the pieces through the wreckage to try and save them. 
“I didn’t intend for that to happen…it just happened that way. You assumed that König had slept around - I didn’t say it - I just didn't correct you. I couldn’t correct you!”
“Do you think that helps? Do you think it’s better knowing that you took advantage of my trust - in all of the 141’s trust? Do you know how much it hurts to realise that someone that you thought you could count on could be capable of deceiving you for months? That someone that you treat like family apparently doesn’t give a shit and would throw you away for a bit of Austrian Muscle? He’s barely even a person under all that fight and armour, he’s a fucking monster, Sneak, and yet you’ve left us for him!”
You clenched your teeth and rubbed the tears from your cheeks, furiously shaking even though you tried to resist. Ghost knew he had you overwhelmed. He was taking full advantage of your upset, taking his revenge on you now and tearing you down. After all those months you spent running ahead of him, keeping on top of all your lies, you’d really thought that you might manage to get away with it all. Not anymore. Your feet were knocked from under you now.
“I- It- It wasn’t like that!” You protested, choking on your words.
“How wasn’t it?” Ghost roared.
“Because he’s not a monster! We care for each other, he- he cares for me, Ghost.”
“Oh, clearly! You’d have to, it has to be worth it, doesn’t it? You’ve made your choice haven’t you? You’ve gambled your place in the 141 all these months and now your chickens have come home to roost. You think you broke our trust by going against my order that day on the field? How do you think this elaborate fucking lie is going to look to Price? It’s going to ruin you, Sneak.You’re going to break up the team!”
“You mean- you, and Pr- Price is going to kick me out?”
“Who knows what the fuck he’ll do! All I know for fact is that this is going to shake the trust of everyone here. It sure as shit rocked my faith in you, who knows what the others will think when they hear about this. Doesn’t make sense to keep someone around that’s capable of going behind our backs like this.”
A boulder settled in your stomach then. Ghost’s voice had dropped severely low, his angry snarling dying down to a quiet threat. His eyes were narrowed and staring at you with a deadly precision, betraying the scene that surely played in his head - the one where he strangled you for making such an idiot out of him. 
“Ghost, please,” you whimpered, closing your eyes. “I didn’t want things to be this way. I had every intention of staying away, but it’s just…Well…I couldn’t give up on König, I care about the team and I love you all like brothers, but that doesn’t mean I could just abandon König and all the feelings I had for him. I just… I just thought that I could have both.”
You felt like an idiot saying it out loud. 
In that moment a haunting realisation overtook you, the minute you opened your eyes and saw Ghost’s almost hollow mask sockets staring back at you through the gloom, you knew something. You’d made your choice all those months ago. You’d chosen König. That’s how everyone would see it anyway, they’d never understand how much you wished you could be a part of both worlds. 
You knew Ghost could see exactly what you were thinking. He snorted as all the features in your face drooped, backing away from you. You sniffed and pushed yourself off the wall, barely keeping yourself from stumbling as you chased after him. 
“Ghost, wait!”
He chuckled, his throat emitting a dark and choppy sound, one you hadn’t heard before. You shivered and tried to catch up with him, boots slapping hard and fast against the floor as you attempted to match his furious pace.
“Ghost, please, you can’t tell Price yet!”
“And why’s that, Sneak? You want a little accomplice in this, hm? You want someone else to go against Price just to make you feel better? The 141 isn’t a fuckin’ joke, even if you want to treat it that way.”
“I’m not asking you to lie!” you cried out, finally skidding to a stop in front of Ghost. “I’m asking you to wait.”
“Why would I do that?” he scoffed.
“Because we have a job to do,” you said, steeling yourself as much as you could even while tears still ran hot as acid down your cheeks and over your jaw.
“Oh, so now you care about doing your job, huh?”
“I care about you all, I care about the team, I care about this job more than anyone could ever know. Even though I fucked up…even though what I’ve done says otherwise, I do care. That’s why I’m asking you just to hold onto this until the job’s finished. I know exactly how this will go down Ghost, I know everyone will say the same as you have. Do you think this is what the team needs right before going away?”
You sighed and rubbed a palm over your sweating forehead, running your fingers over the wet strands of your hair. You’d been caught dead centre in your web of lies, the least you could do is untangle it with a sense of grace. Let your ruin come at the end of your last mission, let Price handle it all with a clear head, it was the least you could do. You had to make him see that.
“You can’t afford to lose anyone before you go after, Rousseau,” you continued, “Not the night before we leave. Just let me help you with this and then I’ll go to Price myself after all this is through. Just let me try to make things right and then…and then if- if Price wants to kick me out he can. I accept that…just let me help.”
Ghost halted in his tracks and balled his fists, kinetic energy fizzling away as he seemed to consider swinging them. You winced already, scrunching your eyes as you prepared for him to send you flying, but the hit never came. He opted for rolling his shoulders back instead and he paused on your words. For a moment, you worried he might reconsider and give you that well deserved blow, you weren’t completely relaxing yet. Tension sizzled through you both like a bomb fuse. 
Deep down though, you knew he wouldn’t follow through on any of the dark thoughts swirling in his mind. Simmering in the burn of his gaze was a man that was deeply hurt. Even though you were probably one of the lowest life forms in his eyes at that moment, you were still family and he would never punish you like that. Even if he would willingly watch you go into exile.
“You’re telling me you feel fit to operate right now?” he asked, his words coming out with careful measure. 
“There’s no other choice. I have to be,” you said with a bitter laugh, feeling like if you continued anymore, you might go hysterical. “All I know is that if we bring this to Price now, it puts the whole mission at risk and becomes a distraction. I accept that I fucked up, and that you probably can barely stand the sight of me, I do. For the sake of a mission though…don’t you think that we should get through this and let the team deal with it after? The last thing anyone needs is this. Please Ghost, you know I’m right. Even if this is the mission I go down on, at least let me do it without putting the others at risk because of what I’ve done.”
Ghost grunted and looked away from you, letting his body sag as he weighed your words. You’d gotten through to him, you’d delayed the inevitable. You knew it. You just needed him to say it. 
You wished that he’d just tell you he’d let it go completely. For a hopeful second you wondered if maybe some time would stop him wanting to let Price know at all. Though that was never going to happen - if not for the fact that he was hurt from being lied to, then it would be the complete destruction of his faith in you. 
Why couldn’t you have just listened to Ghost from the start? Why had you hurt him like this? 
It was all getting too much to carry. Your heart thumped slowly and filled with lead and oil, thickening the blood in your veins like tar. Your whole body felt wrong, your lungs were gasping just to get by. Your head was spinning as it tried to process all that had happened, rattling with the drum beat of your pulse. It took every ounce of energy you had left just to stay upright, feeling like you might start swaying as you lingered in Ghost's heavy shadow. 
“Alright,” he said eventually, voice gruff and distant. “Fine.”
You swallowed thickly and risked eye contact with him. That only served to reignite his anger though, the shadows in the hallway seemingly shivering around him as he loomed over you again.
“I won’t tell Price yet, but I’m warning you - you wait a single moment to tell him when we get back from this, then I’ll find that dopey Austrian cunt, and I’ll string him up and make you watch as what little light he has in him leaves his miserable fucking corpse. Do I make myself clear?”
You froze before nodding stiffly, body jerking as he shoved past you. 
“Clear,” you whispered, talking to no one as you were left alone in the empty grey corridor. 
-☠️- 
You confined yourself to the darkness that night. You were alone in your room, curling your hands around your knees in bed with the lights off, heavily breathing like some kind of demented horror movie creature. The Only thing that haunted you though was your mind. 
There was no getting away from it, no sharing the load with anyone else, who was there to tell? It was just you and your horrible thoughts, locked up tight together with no respite from any voices of reason. It wasn’t like you could tell the others. 
König had tried to message you, but you couldn’t face him. You just messaged something quick back, reading only a couple lines of what he’d sent you first. You couldn’t talk to him either. There was no way he could know about what Ghost knew or otherwise you’d be kicking off the fight of the century.  
Even with the complete lack of light in that tiny space, you still continued to see the bright whites of Ghost’s mask in front of your face. His hard blue eyes were burning holes into you like the pits of hell. It had your heart racing. Your skin felt too hot, your lungs burned with effort, feeling like they would burst with your heart ramming into them. Nothing could calm you down.
Knock.
Knock. 
You froze in your place, back stiffening somehow even further against the corner you’d shoved yourself into. You weren’t expecting company. Part of your mind wondered if Ghost had given in and told Price. Though as you thought on it for a few more seconds you knew in your heart of hearts that the moment, if Price knew about your relationship he sure as fuck wouldn’t come quietly knocking on your door. The sound was too soft, like someone that was trying to be discreet. 
Only one person that could be - surely.
You padded over to the door and took a breath, holding the cold handle in your palm for a moment and letting it recenter you. If it was who you suspected it was, you couldn’t let him know that you’d been found out. He couldn’t get mad at Ghost and give you away. He couldn’t have the stress of your relationship reveal running through his mind while you were in an active warzone. If something were to happen to König because of your stupidity, then Price finding out about you both would be the least of your worries. 
Why had you chosen the path that had put everyone you love into such a horrible position? Why had you lied so much to them all? 
You swallowed the lump in your throat and closed your eyes for a second, only just opening the door as a tall figure had begun to retreat in the darkness. You watched as the giant stopped in his tracks and then you smiled softly when he walked back to you. The red tears of his mask were the first things to reveal themselves as he stepped into the flickering light that buzzed by your door. 
“Did I wake you?” König asked, honey thick voice coming in at a low whisper. 
“No,” you sighed, gesturing for him to come in, “couldn’t sleep. How come you’re here? You haven’t messaged.”
“I couldn’t sleep either. I wanted to see you before we left - see you alone,” he answered, stepping into your doorway. “And i did message, you messaged me back - remember? You were a little blunt with me, so I got worried.”
Oh.
You shut the door behind him and watched as he walked confidently past you and over to the lamp by your bed. He’d only been in your room a couple of times, despite your insistence he shouldn't risk showing up. Though even those stolen moments were enough for him to remember the layout as if the room were his own.
He flicked the switch on your lamp that sat on your bedside table and looked back up at you then. He was bathed in warm yellow light like an angel that had been sent to soothe your troubled head. Even his eyes seemed to melt through the edge that had settled over you. 
“You don’t look very good, darling,” he noted, frowning over at you. “What’s wrong? Have you been crying?”
He tilted his head at you and with that, seemed to remember he was still wearing his mask. His eyes had grown wide like pale blue whirlpools. With fumbling hands, König tugged the fabric over his head and got himself out of the draped material, his tired face was revealed. His hair blew around before it settled into a messy nest on top of his head and his dark eyes refocused on you once he’d been freed from the hood. They were baggy with exhaustion. 
You knew that feeling well. Not that you could tell him the real reason why.
“Hm?” he hummed, walking towards you now. “What’s got you so upset?”
You shook your head and tried to smile at him, accepting the hug that he wrapped you into with a sigh of relief. You didn’t have a good answer for him. Instead you pressed your head into his chest and inhaled his scent, taking in hints of gunfire and metal that his mask had left behind and, of course, the faint notes of your berry tea - betraying his thievery. 
“Have you been stealing my tea again, mister?” you asked, trying to distract him.
“Me? Stealing from you? Never,” he chuckled, the sound reverberating through his body and soaking through to yours. 
“More like all the time!” you grinned, finally chancing a look up at him again.
“Well really, you only have yourself to blame,” he said, stroking his thumb across your chin. “You should never have got me hooked on it if you didn’t want me to indulge myself every once in a while.”
“Mmm…Is that so?”
“Yeah, that’s so.”’
You shook your head at him and tapped him on the arm, prompting him to release you. He let you go, but followed immediately behind you when you went to sit on the bed. He took little time in swiftly drawing you back into his hold once again, nestling you both into the wrinkled sheets on your sad little bed, adjusting himself into your extra cushions. 
His presence might have been making you feel uneasy, the pressure to not tell him anything growing with each passing second. However it was undeniable that the weight around your body was helping you, scattering your worries the tighter he held you.
“Are you going to tell me?” König pressed.
“Tell you what?”
“You know what,” he said dryly. 
You huffed out a sigh. He wasn’t going to let it go though, he repositioned you then and made you face him, keeping you pinned and lying on your side. 
“I know that the reason you smell of berries is because you don’t lift your mask all the way when you drink my tea. Then it gets damp and rubs off onto your shirt,” you said softly, smiling to yourself as you thought of him guiltily sneaking cups of it.
He looked down at you pointedly and rolled his eyes. Ok, so he wasn’t going to let it go then. You stared back at him for a moment before you lay back against his chest and proceeded to close your eyes, reaching out into the beyond to try and think of something to say. Anything other than the truth behind your insomnia. 
“I’m worried about this op,” you whispered quietly. “And what comes after.”
“What? Why?” he asked, wrapping his arm around you tighter. “Why on earth would you be worried?”
“There’s a lot riding on it. It’ll be dangerous too, more than any of the other missions we’ve been on,” you shrugged. “Then there’s the unknowns that’ll come after it as well.”
“You know what will come after it,” König said, a smile weaving itself into his voice. “We will go to Austria together and I will take you on many adventures and buy you lots of good food, real food.”
You laughed a little at what he said and relaxed against him. You could feel the steady rhythm of his heart thudding away behind your head, working away, strong as ever. Maybe the world wasn’t going to completely end, you thought distantly to yourself, maybe even if you didn’t have the 141 you could still make the best of things. Hell, maybe you could move to Austria. 
In choosing König, you weren’t going to be alone after you were kicked out. You would still have him. It didn’t lift the burden that was sinking your heart any, but it sought to bring some light back into your mind. The thought of mountain trails and mornings waking up to his gentle kisses and calloused hands trailing their way down your back weren’t so bad, maybe there was something even a little enticing about those thoughts... 
Your life would be in tatters, sure, but it would still be worth living. There would still be some happiness, even if you were down the love of four family members… Even if you never got to speak to them again. 
“I am looking forward to our trip, that’s for sure,” you replied measuredly. “I just…I mean- I guess I don’t know what things will be like after all this is over. We’ve been working together through this mission through our whole relationship and now that it’s coming to an end… I dunno - I guess I’m just intimidated by all the unknowns.”
You felt ok saying that. It wasn’t completely false. In reality you were far more worried about the situations you knew you’d face rather than the ones that were unknown, but ultimately Price being told about your relationship was still a mystery in terms of punishment.
You had no idea what he might decide to do with you once he’d found out about your betrayal. For all you were aware he could’ve been planning to send you off to one of the worst deployments that you’d ever known in your life. What then?
“You always worry so much” König sighed, tracing his hand up your body so that he could stroke the side of your face. “Know that whatever we both do next…no matter what…you will have all of my heart, and I will do anything to make sure that you get to hold it in your arms whenever possible…because I love you.”
You froze in place, eyes going wide as you processed what he said. He had spoken the unspoken, he had finally put into words the feelings that you knew were there, but both of you had been too guarded to let slip. He was telling you that he loved you, giving you a gift while you lied straight to his face.
“I love you and I will do anything to make this work. I’d dig a hole through to the otherside of the world just to be with you, there’s nowhere you can be sent to that I won’t find a way to reach you,” he whispered, pressing a kiss into your cheek. 
You let a little breath of silence hang in the air for a moment and bit your lip, feeling a tear track its way down your face while you battled with your throat to stay silent. You couldn’t let him know what you were actually upset about. 
You loved him too after all. 
And for that reason you couldn't reveal the truth that Ghost had uncovered, it would send him spiralling. Would compromise him and mission. You could put him in danger, more so than you had already by involving Ghost - and soon Price’s - wrath. 
“I love you too, König…” you murmured. “I love you so much.”
He let out a breath at your admission, you felt it whistling past your neck. You shivered, and tried not to think too hard on what would happen when he found out you’d withheld the truth from him that night. 
“I love you so much, in fact, that I’m looking past the fact that you chose the night before a huge operation to tell me that,” you said with a laugh, trying to distract yourself from the demon’s in your head. 
He laughed too. You both relaxed into the vibrations of each other's bodies and then lay quietly for a moment, staring up at the old scuffed ceiling above. 
Though you couldn’t linger there for long. You pushed your way out of his almost iron grip and rolled around, propping your head up so that you could see his face. You were surprised to see the look of consternation that greeted you. It was like looking into a mirror. His eyes were half lidded as he looked down and his lips were pursed, the pink line of his scar stretching taught as he thought deeply on something.
“Well, seeing as you love me too… Would you offer me some assurance?”
You reached over to him and cupped his jaw in your hands, adjusting his face so that he’d meet your gaze. You searched his eyes for a moment and suddenly something clicked in the place as you were finally broken out of your wallowing. 
“Assurance for whatever it was that you couldn’t sleep over?” you guessed. 
He nodded, the scratch of his stubble sharply rubbing against your palm. You smoothed your thumb over his cheek and he leaned into your touch, somehow looking younger and smaller than he usually did. 
“Things will be intense tomorrow…I will be breaching rooms with countless unknown men that will be shooting at us, and I’ll be having to make quick decisions - act on instinct. Whatever you see tomorrow, know that I love you and that I wish you didn’t have to witness any of it. In another life, I’d spare you from ever having to even know about it. I just need to know, that after we come back, no matter what you see, that you won’t run from me. As much as I’ve tried to protect myself, I know that that’s all over now. I know now there’s no way to save myself from the hurt, the same way I couldn’t protect myself from anyone else I’ve ever loved in my life. I just want to know that you’ll give me a chance to explain myself if you see something that you don’t like again… that you won’t leave me.”
Oh König…
You felt the remainder of your tears threaten to spill over and flood your sheets, but you held them back and closed your eyes instead, thinking for a moment.  You hadn’t reacted well the last time you’d heard him at work. How would you react if you were to see him in action now? 
You shuddered at the thought, but let it pass quickly. At the end of the day, you were all going there to reap an unspeakable violence to a group of people that had committed atrocities in return. There were no pure intentions and there were no good players between any of you. There was only putting an end to a group that threatened to kill innocents. If König was going to be at the head of the speartip, then he had to be damn sharp. You couldn’t have him ineffective with worry over what you might think.
Couldn’t put him at risk.
“König, I promise that whatever I see…whatever I think or feel in the moment…I won’t shut you out. We can talk about it all when we get home again. But whatever you do, don’t put yourself in harm's way trying to protect my feelings. We’ll make it through this together, no matter what, ok?”
He smiled at you, a twinkle returning to his sapphire irises. He turned and kissed your hand, you still held his head, and you both closed your eyes for a moment, revelling in the private moment between yourselves. 
“Ok,” he finally replied. “I feel like I can sleep now. Why don’t you try to get some rest as well? See if you can shut off that busy mind of yours.”
You both settled into a silence after that, letting yourselves relax into the calm. At some point you turned back around and a little while later, König switched off your lamp. In the back of your mind you worried that you’d be discovered come morning time, but König assuaged your fears before you could air them and whispered to you, tickling your ear as he told you that he’d set an early alarm. 
“I love you, König,” you whispered, your half smile lost to the night.
It felt like something to giggle over, like a secret between school children. You could barely contain your smile. 
“I love you too,” König replied, pressing a kiss to your temple, “I’ll love you always.”
-☠️- 
König had stayed true to his word and had left while the sky remained dark, shutting off his near silent alarm on the second ring and scurrying out quietly before anyone would be any the wiser. Anyone that didn’t already know anything anyway.
It felt like Ghost had almost sold you out the moment that you’d stepped foot onto the transport. The sound of your boots nervously clanging against the metal ramp drew his attention, and all at once his conversation with the Captain ceased and he fixed his eyes on you with a glare.
It was enough to freeze you into place, forcing you to maintain eye contact with him until he released his mental hold over you. You Clutched furiously onto the handle of your backpack, hoping like hell that it wouldn’t shake too badly.
For a few painful seconds you were stuck still, though just as you thought that Ghost might say something after all, he turned away again and blanked you completely. Price gave him a frown and said something low under his breath, but whatever it was Ghost shook his head and carried on with what they were discussing before.
It was like some kind of twisted game of red light/green light. If that’s the way he’s going to play things this’ll be a hell of a way to go out, you thought to yourself. That is if you even made it out of the mission.
You were supposed to be on Ghost’s team, and at that point you weren’t completely convinced that he would bother too much to look out for you anymore. No, now it was just you and Horangi, and as much as König seemed to get on with him, you and he had never exchanged more than a couple of words to each other. 
Would Soap and Gaz offer swapsies?
You shook your head at the thought of Gaz ever going off plan, especially one that Price had approved. No, instead of hoping for better, you faced reality and took a seat far away from Ghost, throwing your stuff down for what felt like the last time. You sank down on your cracking knees, settling next to your bulging bag and holding it like a plush toy. The squishy material was solid under your grasp and made a great pillow for you to rest your head on. It was enough to lull you into a sense of security, enough to make you close your eyes. 
“Sneak!”
Your head shot up and you lost your breath, staring wide eyed into the direction that you’d heard the voice come from. Was it Ghost? Was he going to reveal everything just to spite you now that you were getting comfortable?
No. Soap looked down at you instead, shooting you a grin as he saw how much you’d shit yourself at his shout. Stupid bastard. You hit out at his leg and huffed when he sat down next to you, feeling like his loud obnoxious voice in your ear was just about the last thing you needed.
And just to sour your mood more, just to make matters all the better, he shoved your shoulder and almost sent you keeling over and tumbling over to Ghost and Price. As if Ghost needed another reason to want to get back at you. 
You threw your hands out and pushed yourself up, attempting to shove him almost twice as hard back. He’d dodged at the last second and had you wheeling forward this time, though at the very least you had your bag to fall onto instead of Ghost this time. 
“What the fuck are you being so childish for?” you grumbled, recovering and rubbing the sore spot where he’d shoved you. 
“Ooft, someone’s grumpy, eh?” Soap tittered, smile never leaving his face. “Did you not get much rest last night?”
You grunted and folded your arms, staring straight ahead like you might melt the plane’s walls. 
“The fuck does it matter to you?”
“I’ll take that as a yes then - as usual.”
Soap raised his brows, challenging you to defend yourself. Normally you’d probably shove him again or throw a verbal barb at him, but that day you were in no mood to play. Especially not when the truth was going to come out sooner rather than later, and you weren’t convinced you were going to be on joking terms anymore. 
No, it wouldn’t be long until he knew about you and König, and your mind was already filled with the sight of his angry frown setting itself upon you. It was better that you didn’t make it all worse by pretending everything was fine, you reasoned, so that being the case you ignored him and planted your head back down on your bag. 
“Crabbit little twat,” Soap snorted. “Better find your sense of humour before you wake up again. And if you’re gonna be in a mood with me, then you can forget sleepin’ and drooling all over me too!”
You grunted in response, and gave him nothing else. You were too sick with worry to respond properly, even despite the ache that developed as you realised that that might be one of your last ‘friendly’ interactions with him. The weight in your heart increased tenfold, feeling as if it were a sand timer growing heavier by the minute. Better not to think about it. Better to shut it all out, to shut down. 
Unsurprisingly your mood wasn’t lifted by the sleep you caught up on. It only served to keep you from agonising about your situation until the plane slammed down onto the dodgy countryside landing strip. That shocked you back to life again. From then on, until you reached the safe house, your mood remained sour and kept the others from bothering you much.
When you got there, of course, you had to buck up and try to act normal. You couldn’t have the others picking anything up, couldn’t let them think you were anything else except tired and grumpy. It wasn’t that far outside the realm of normal, you never slept very well whenever you had to travel away anyway. 
When it came time to go over the briefing, you quietly set yourself as far away from Ghost as you could muster and stood around the projector wall, listening to Price’s briefing intently while you locked your arms into a folded position. The light splashed across his face in brief interludes, his weight was shifting from foot to foot as he walked you all through the plan in his booming voice, he was restless. He was right to be. 
Price knew that the intelligence that had been gathered was of questionable accuracy - he told you all as much and Laswell confirmed it. She didn’t look that much more confident that him. The men who’d spilled their guts to the interrogators had varying degrees of incentive to reveal the true nature and layout of their base and all of you knew that they were highly fantastical to boot. It didn’t matter how many exercises you’d run through, none of you could’ve really known what was in store for when you raided the warehouse. 
You’d looked round the room as he’d talked about that, scoping out the faces of all the men that you were going to fight alongside. Your eyes slowly ran over the 141, König, Horangi, and all those of the other team that Price had assembled to lock down the perimeter. There were hard eyes all around, everyone stayed quiet, listening to the captain until his very last word. Even Laswell had limited interjections, she was just as stone faced as everyone else, letting Price take the lead.
“I want all of you to be at the top of your game. On a mission like this there is zero and I really do mean zero margin for error! You make a mistake on Rousseau’s home turf and you will get yourself or one of your teammates killed. All of you must communicate, I want clear positions and status updates on comms. You will tell me where you are in the warehouse and you will let me know who you come across, is that clear?”
You all responded, an impassioned “yes, sir!” rang throughout the room, ricocheting off of the walls and back into the crowd  like a bullet. 
“Good,” Price said curtly. “Now, enough talking,we move out in thirty minutes. And remember - Zero margin for error! Clear communication! Don’t get yourselves killed.”
“Yes, sir!”
You all sounded off for the last time and set to work scurrying around, gathering gear and preparing the trucks for departure. You’d be driving out until you reached the edge of the forest and from then on you would be trekking out to the compound, a group of old warehouses that had belonged to a logging company before it had gone out of business years before. You were in for a hard day.
Though as Ghost reminded you, when he icily stared at you from the otherside of the room, the hardship wasn’t going to end at capturing Rousseau. Your problems were only going to multiply from that day on.
You were the first to break eye contact that time, nervously shifting away and grabbing your gear, double checking your ammo and your pockets. You stroked your hands up through the curves and rough textures of your armour and bags and went through your mental checklist, trying to fill your mind with something other than all the swirling thoughts that threatened to compromise you. 
“All good, Sneak?”
You snapped your head to your left side, meeting Gaz’s tilted stare. 
“All good, Sergeant,” you answered, repacking a few of your rounds. 
“Sergeant?” he chuckled.
“Did your rank change while I was asleep?”
“No, but you seemed to,” he shrugged.
“I’m stressed, there’s a lot at stake here,” you said, swallowing down another of your silly lies. “But all that matters is that I’m here right?”
Gaz shook his head as you reminded him of the words he’d said to you months before. Ever since he’d lectured you about letting König distract you, you liked to tease him and call him mini Price, reciting his words back to him without fail. I wanna go out there knowing you’re here with us and not turning yourself into a walking target. You’d do your best Price impression whenever you recounted them. 
You didn’t bother this time - not while Price was in the room with you. Gaz rolled his eyes and patted your back, almost turning away to sort his own things before a smile lit his face. 
“Well with a good attitude like that I might just keep you around when I get promoted to Captain,” he laughed, walking away before he could see the smile dropping off your face. 
Gaz might’ve wanted to keep you around - but would Price? 
-☠️- 
It was unsurprising, to say the least, that you were going to discover John Rousseau’s last stand wasn’t going to be easy. No. He was intent on going out with a bang.  
It had been a difficult breach, you’d lost a couple of the men that Price had sent to crack the warehouse open with you. They’d fallen in the fatal funnel that had been created when the enemy worked out your entry point. Despite the high levels of bloodshed though, König remained mostly unharmed.
You’d tried not to let yourself get distracted by him, but even still, had found your eyes magnetised to him at times, had seen him shooting quickly and forcing enemies close when he needed to, basically folding people in half in an effort to break them. Some of the sounds their bones made still echoed in your ears. 
Everything had moved so fast. Your mind had very little bandwidth to process it all. One moment you were on the first floor, desperately trying to locate the stairs and get to Rousseau’s ‘war room’, the next you were deep into the building, continuing to blast through doors with Soap at the head while you, Ghost and Horangi secured the rear. 
Gunshots echoed out throughout the hallways, lights flickered and sparked and rained down electrical orange confetti as they were shot from the ceiling and swung out like some kind of deadly assault course. The floor in front of you flashed white and gold and soon you were drowned in darkness. All the lights in the room crashed down into their final resting places.
Ghost was in the room across from you, Horangi was with him too. You’d decided to separate when you’d seen a lone man run into the little office, you were convinced you’d seen someone hauling a massive gun across his back. It was hard to be sure what it was, maybe some type of PKM, but whatever it could have been would do a lot of damage, you knew that much. Though now, as you were left alone in the shadows, it had felt like your mind had played tricks on you.
Your breathing was shallow, and no matter how thick your earbuds were, your ears were still ringing from all the abuse they’d had to endure. It felt like you’d been crammed under an old church bell and someone was hitting it on all sides. There was a lightning storm in your head and a heatwave through your whole body. 
Part of you was almost begging to be in the debrief with Price already. 
You flicked your night vision down and scoped the room, tracing through the green fog for any signs of enemies. There was nothing obvious. The pulse of your speeding heart thumped away steadily in your ears while the room remained deathly still. Where the fuck are you?
Something flashed out of the corners of your eyes and before you could even turn to see it, you were being overwhelmingly set upon. You stepped backward and leveraged your weight, getting yourself in a good position to strike your assailant and baulked when he stopped you in your tracks and smashed you against the wall. 
Ouch.
The air shot out of your lungs, your goggles had skewed over your eyes, but after a few seconds of shock you were thankfully able to dodge the figure from hitting you and shoved them off to your side. With tears in your eyes, and knees screaming out, you got yourself up. 
It was fight or die. You picked up your gun, scraping the heavy weapon against the floor, and unloaded it into your attacker, just as he tried to rush you again. 
His body collapsed to the floor in a spray of mist and you watched motionlessly as he fell forward and into a lifeless heap at your feet. The gun was like a lead brick in your arms, but still you held it aloft, waiting for anyone else that might try to get the drop on you.
Why’s it so quiet?
“Sneak, what the fuck was that?” Ghost called out. “And where the fuck did you run off to?”
You could hear him distantly through in the other room, but his voice was also straining loud and clear over the busy comms, you knew your reply would be too. All of you had been running around for a lot longer than you would’ve liked. Then again, it was a blessing that you were still up and kicking if anything. There had been so many surprise attacks launched on you, you were lucky to only sport a few bruises for your troubles. 
“In the room across from you LT. Took down an enemy, heading back to you now.”
You took one last look around the ruins of the office, and once satisfied there were no more hidden assailants, you walked toward the doorway. After plastering yourself to the wall, you took a look up and down the hall, pivoting out a little just to be sure no one was going to take a lucky shot. All clear. Well, one end of the hallway anyway, the other was completely blocked off by a stack of fallen units and desks. 
Probably not a good sign.
Were they directing you?
You crossed the threshold fully and bolted into the next room, locking eyes with Ghost as he perched his foot on a fallen desk chair, it was rattling from his weight. Horangi gave you a nod from Ghost’s side and glanced over to the head of the room, keeping watch over Soap as he set up his charges with no small amount of grumbling. That wasn’t a good sign either. 
Your body was getting tired, your back was aching from all the weight you’d been hauling round. The only thing getting lighter was your ammo. You were praying that you were close to the end, hoping that wherever this supposed room was that Rousseau had locked himself into, it was going to reveal itself soon. You didn’t know how much more you could take.
“Stay on that door Sneak, make sure no one else goes looking for hiding spots” Ghost directed. “What’s taking so long, Soap?” 
You turned and followed Ghost’s order, side eyeing König as he stood over your struggling teammates, dwarfing Gaz and Soap under his watchful stance. He was breathing heavily, you could see the dramatic rise and fall of his hood giving away his fatigue. Other than that though, you were relieved to see that he was still unhurt.
Focus!
You snapped your attention to the hallway again and ignored your boyfriend, pulling your thoughts away from him completely. It had been a long time since you’d been on a mission with König and you were unused to the amount of space he took up. He was clouding your thoughts, sending your brain churning out worry like a spitting volcano as he kept charging through doorways and getting up close and personal with men as if he were indestructible.  
You shook your head and cast your eyes through the shadows, watching out for movement. You couldn’t linger over König any longer. 
Soon you realised that there wasn’t any noise. It wasn’t right. Things never went the way you’d trained for almost one hundred percent of the time, but it was strange that there hadn’t been more men around. You’d encountered most of the men on the way in and now that you were further into the heart of the building they were sprouting up in numbers few and far between. That combined with the fact the building felt strategically blocked off in areas was all just one big red flag, waving and buffeting like a sail in the breeze. 
“LT, there’s explosives already set here,” Soap shouted. “I couldn’t be sure before…but they've hidden them in the door casing. Powerful stuff by the looks of it too. If we try to get through this we could end up blasting ourselves to the moon by the looks of it.”
You whipped your head around and back to the group at the door, watching as they all stepped back. All at once everyone's heads snapped to Ghost and he frowned deeply enough that it could be seen through his eyeblack.
“Price, did you get that?” Ghost asked, speaking clearly for the comms. 
“Copy,” Price said, his voice crackling through all of your headsets. “Can you find an alternative route ahead?”
“Not on this floor,” Ghost responded. “This is the only way up.”
“Fuck!”
You winced at Price’s outburst and bit your lip. Should you speak?
Fuck it.
“There haven’t been a lot of men compared to what we expected either,” you noted. “Anyone else get the feeling we’ve been set up?”
Everyone else seemed to have the same thought, Gaz nodded your way, König looked like he wanted to scratch his way out of the walls and take you with him, Ghost narrowed his eyes. Was he annoyed you’d stated the obvious? You frowned over at him, but he moved shortly after that, sidling up to the window and taking a cautious peak outside. His back visibly stiffened as he caught a glimpse of something. 
“Price, there’s a truck heading out the gates to the south side. Do you see it?”
“We’re tracking it now. Ghost, take both of the teams out of the warehouse, whatever’s going on, I don’t like it. Meet us back at the extraction point, copy?”
“Copy, Captain.”
Ghost motioned his head in the direction of the doorway you were still guarding and while the others filed toward you, you stayed in place. You had to ensure no one would surprise them while they stepped out of the room. Ghost passed you and patted your shoulder, his touch like a lightning shock to your system. 
As much of a professional as he was, you hadn't expected him to be at a point where he was making an effort to praise you. A warmth spread over your chest then. 
Nevertheless, you couldn’t let yourself get too carried away. You put it to the back of your mind and followed up the rear of your group, looking around as you passed through the hallways of fallen men. Bodies littered the floors and by then most of the hallways were dark and devoid of any lighting. The green haze of your night vision goggles continued to wave unsettlingly and the crunch of debris was ever present under your boots. 
“We need to move slowly and quietly,” Ghost directed, heading toward the front of your group. “If the bastards have set up bombs there’s no telling what way they were trying to direct us and what happens if another one of them catches us alive. Any one of them could have a detonator, and we know from previous encounters they’re not shy about martyring themselves for the cause.”
Your heart rate picked up, but still you kept marching ahead. The group moved forward like a little troupe of ants, following your masked leader to what you hoped was safety. Each skittering stray piece of furniture under your feet had you jumping, every breath you took was like a gust of wind. Even with your ears ringing it felt like every bit of muffled noise was coming through like the beginnings of a dance anthem.
Knowing that someone with the power to blow the whole building on you might jump out at any second wasn’t great for your weakening composure. That wouldn’t stop you though. Your group powered on down the halls until you reached the lower stairway, and each of you took every step with care, pointing your weapons in different directions just to be sure that every angle was covered. 
With your gun pointed down, you were able to see that there was activity on the bottom floor, you could see people moving down below. You tapped Soap on the shoulder and pointed them out, allowing him to pass on the message until it carried on through the line and down to Ghost. All of you stopped moving then and watched the little group, stuck in silence while they propped open a piece of wood that had been covering a doorway in the stairs.
Ghost extended his arm and gave you all a series of clear hand signals, watching down the line to make sure you all read him clearly. Stay silent. Stay on me. We’re following them.
There was more pressure than ever to make sure that your steps were soundless. Your heartbeat was in your ears and your body was buzzing with how tightly your muscles were wound. Every step took you closer to the bottom and to the hatch, every successful movement gave you hope that you wouldn’t be found out. 
When your group reached the bottom, you were able to see that the men had replaced the sheet of wood and old construction PVC to try and hide the secret exit. Clearly that hadn’t been meant for your eyes. Perhaps it was lucky that you’d come to the stairway at the right time - it was hard to say, maybe they’d meant for exactly that to happen.
Ghost looked to König and together, without having to communicate, they shifted the board and König took position at the front. As always, he was first to breach.
All of you crept into the blown out entryway and were surprised to find a tunnel at your feet, complete with a very haphazard ladder built down into it. Aside from that, the little room you were in was empty. König replaced the piece of wood over the door once everyone was inside and soon you were surrounded in complete shadow, staring around at the others through the green hues. 
“Price, we’ve found a tunnel under the stairway of the building. What do you want us to do?” Ghost enquired, keeping an eye on the tunnel to make sure no one down below indicated that they’d heard him.
The comms were quiet, nothing but the ghostly whisper of static crumbling away at your ears. All of you eyed each other, stares hard enough to the cut the air between you all. The little room was getting hot with all of your bodies filling it, each breath getting harder to take. 
“Price, come in,” Ghost demanded. “Laswell? Anyone?”
Nothing. 
“Fuckin’ hell,” Soap breathed.
You pursed your lips and kept your stare fixed on Ghost. His eyes were jumping between you all like he was deciding on his lunchtime football team. He took a moment to think, trying to bring clarity into the stuffy room, he was probably waiting for Price to come back in too, but nevertheless the line remained dead.
“Right. Here’s what we’re gonna do. More than likely this entire building is rigged to blow, we need to get out, but more than likely this tunnel is a sign that Rousseau must be here. He would never have left all his men behind, he likes to make a show of being on base and ‘protecting’ and taking control of his men. König, you’re gonna lead Horangi and Gaz through the back entrance at the loading bay and head to the extraction point, find out why command isn’t talking to us. I’m taking Sneak and Soap with me and we’re gonna see what’s down there, see if we can’t dig Rousseau out.”
“What?”
All of you turned your heads as König spoke, the sharpness of his voice coming out muffled through his hood. 
“Did you not hear me right?” Ghost asked.
“I heard you clearly, Lieutenant,” König sneered. “But I don’t agree with that course of action. You can’t just go wandering around tunnels with only two people with you, that’s suicide. Price gave his orders before the line went down, he was very clear, therefore we should all be going to the extraction point.”
“This isn’t the time to disagree with me, König.”
“It is if you’re going to get yourself and two of your subordinates killed,” König said, clearly gritting his teeth. “Not to mention you’re abandoning us with god knows how many men waiting outside to stop us from leaving.”
“Nice of you to care about what happens to us,” Ghost remarked, “Then again there’s probably only one person you’re trying to protect here, isn’t there?”
Your stomach dropped to your feet. It was like a small fire had broken out in the room and now you had the urge to go beating down the secret entrance and throwing caution to the wind. Was this really going to happen?
“What’s that supposed to mean?” König asked.
“You know what it means. Now would you like to press the issue or would you like to get back to your job and do what you’re being paid to do, you fucking goon.”
König seemed to shoot you a sideways glance, you couldn’t really tell with his visor down, but before you could think to warn him otherwise he decided that it was indeed time to press the issue. Every fibre of your being wanted to throttle him then. If your choice was crawling into a death tunnel or ending up in an argument between Ghost and König during an operation, then tunnel of death it is!
“Paid personnel or not, at least I’m trying to get us all out safely,” König retorted. 
“All? Trying to make sure we all get out, or just trying to make sure you’ve got a warm hole to crawl back to at the end of this? Which is it really?”
There was an almost tangible silence in the room. It was as if there was a thick bubble coating you all, preventing a single whisper of noise from escaping. You couldn’t even hear the others breathe, not over König anyway. He was panting like a charging bull, breaking through the bubble, he sounded like he was ready to tear Ghost down into a stump.  
“Ghost, what’re you talking about?” Soap said, not able to contain himself. “We shouldn’t be arguing, we should be moving! Let’s just go.”
“You’re not going down into that tunnel, Sergeant!” König warned, making a move to stop Soap.
“Or what?” Ghost asked, rising to his full height and jumping into König’s path.
König stood silently, he didn’t say anything - but he didn't allow Ghost to intimidate him either. He stood perfectly still, besides straightening his back, and eyed his opponent. The two of them looked like windup toys ready to strike. 
“Nothing to say?” Ghost sneered. “Then move.”
“Lieutenant, be reasonable,” König said. 
“I am being incredibly reasonable, König,” Ghost laughed, a dark chuckle rumbling from his throat. “In fact, judging by the way you’re acting, maybe Sneak can tell you just how reasonable I’m being.”
Everyone’s heads turned to you, navigating the thick silence that followed with ease. Their night vision goggles stared you down as if they were being programmed to move in sync. You swallowed a thick lump in your throat and gripped tightly at your gun, holding onto it like it was the only thing tethering you to reality. What were you supposed to say now?
“What’s going on?” Gaz sighed, clearly at the end of his tether. 
“Tell them what’s going on, Sneak,” Ghost ordered. “Tell them exactly why this little song and dance is happening right now. Go on. Let them know why Captain Rags has his face in a twist over you going down into the tunnel. Let’s get it out there for the world to know.”
Every one of his words hit you like a knife in your gut. There were blades sticking out at all angles and it was taking all your strength just to stay up. So this was it? You were truly going out in a blaze, but it was far from glorious. 
“Sneak?” König said, his voice strained with confusion. 
“König, Ghost found the pictures in your wallet when he knocked your stuff off the rack yesterday,” you said quietly. “He knows we’re together.”
“What the fuck!” Soap whispered.
“Sneak, what do you mean you’re together?” Gaz asked. “You can’t be together, Price will fucking kill you…”
Horangi remained silent. 
“Apparently they’re not ones for following orders,” Ghost sneered. “Otherwise we wouldn’t even be having this discussion would we?”
Ghost looked between you both and you growled out at yourself, sinking into disbelief that all of it was really happening. It felt surreal to be standing around arguing in a building that was full of god knows how many explosives. Why was it that König could never just follow orders? Why couldn’t you? The room was so hot it felt like you were all starting to cook, smelt like it too. 
“König, just do as Ghost says and take the others,” you commanded. “At this rate we’re all going to get blown up and this whole argument won’t even matter.”
“Sneak-”
“No, König! Just go, we can all talk about it later.”
“That’s if you even make it back later!”
“Don’t think like that. Just take Horangi and Gaz back to extraction and find out why Price hasn’t answered us. Otherwise none of us are getting out of here!”
König continued to stare for a second more, but finally he’d seen sense. He shook his head and furiously muttered something to himself in German before he walked back to the exit. He gave you one last look and with that, slid back the wooden panel and walked out with Horangi in tow, missing only Gaz as he left you all. 
With the door open and König gone you felt like you could breathe a little easier again, but as soon as you looked back at the others, the feeling went away. Gaz shook his head at you and walked out, mumbling something that was too low to hear and soon it was only you, Ghost and Soap left. 
“Steamin’ Jesus, Sneak. What the fuck were you thinking? Have you really been lying to us all this time?”
You sighed and looked at Soap, watching the way his mouth downturned in disgust. A horrible nauseous feeling permeated in your stomach and in your throat, but you couldn’t pay too much attention to it. You had to keep your head on more important things. 
“Clearly I wasn’t thinking,” you sighed. “Look, I’ll answer whatever questions you want after we’re out of this, but we need to get moving.”
“Agreed,” Ghost said, already heading for the tunnel. “We’ve had enough distraction already.”
Ghost cut Soap off from interrupting, shooting him a hard look before he took a flashbang from one of his holsters and primed it. He threw it down the tunnel and waited for a reaction. Nothing. After being met with silence, he quickly flew down into the darkness, leaving you and Soap up top. Soap surely burned a hole through his night vision and into you. 
You shivered and followed Ghost, cautiously setting your foot on the ladder, not liking the way it wobbled with Ghost’s weight and yours. There wasn’t much to be done about it though. You had to get down there quickly and make sure he had backup.
You scurried down and stuck one foot behind the other, releasing each of the metal rungs like they were on fire. It didn’t take long until you were at the bottom and eventually Soap followed you both and rather nicely decided against booting you in the head on his way down, dropping to your side instead.
“There’s no one here, but they’ll have heard that, no doubt,” Ghost warned. “Stay close and lets find out what these fuckers are hiding down here.”
You nodded your agreement and followed him down the tunnel, watching the rickety support beams with a cautious eye. König had been right to worry.
What’s he thinking right now? Is he hurt?
Not again, stop thinking about him. Focus! 
The tunnel didn’t seem like it had been in operation for very long. Something that had seen more use would surely have been built better, you reasoned, not looking like it could crumble at any second. As you took a few more twists and turns and continued to follow the path it didn’t seem to get much better. The walls looked hastily dug out and like any little disturbance might bury them. Though as you all turned another corner and followed the winding walkway, you were surprised to find yourself in a rather large cavernous room.
It was built solidly and looked far more like a permanent structure, it was supported by thick metal beams from which overhead lights were suspended and hanging down from long wires. It also contained a plethora of scaffolding like shelves, housing a few abandoned looking wooden crates, some of them looked like they’d been raided, others were dusty and dark with disuse. You flipped your goggles up and watched the two men at your sides repeat the action, finally noticing the true extent of all the grime and blood that had covered them both. 
“What is this place?” Soap wondered out loud. 
“Looks like some kind of storage facility. Well, it was one anyway,” you remarked.
You didn’t miss the way Soap narrowed his eyes at you from the side of his vision. He advanced forward through the looming racks while you stayed behind and watched the other men go. You had to give yourself a second for the bile to stop rising in your stomach. To say that being on an op with two men that had it out for you was making you feel uneasy was an understatement. 
However you didn’t have the luxury of lingering on for very long. Once you noticed Ghost heading to the set of shelves that blocked your view of the head of the room, you started to follow after him, ensuring that he’d have some cover. Part of you felt better being around someone that had had longer to digest the news. 
Once you’d flown past the racks and over to Ghost you began to realise that there was a thrumming noise emanating from the far side of the room. It rumbled and growled and grew harder on your ears the closer you got and as soon as you made your way round the racking you saw the source of it. A big set of metal doors.
Soap joined you from the otherside, clearly finding the rest of the room just as empty as you had. Ghost looked over to Soap then and back at the door, motioning for him to get close. 
“Soap, do you have the borescope?”
“Aye, hold on, I’ll sort it.”
Soap reached into his bag and pulled out the long snake of wire and fetched his drill. From there he made a small opening in the door with quick precision and sent the coiled camera through, taking a look at the monitor as he did so. The monitor quickly flashed on and you and Ghost were able to peer round and see a flurry of men running around a mixture of freight and pickup trucks, loading cargo onto them. There were some that were beginning to drive off, halting just as they made it onto the big ramp then ran up the far side of that room. 
How on earth had they managed to hide that? 
You frowned as you watched on, realising that the last trucks were beginning to get closed up and prepared for driving off, you could hear the echoes of the doors being slammed shut. The men were shouting louder now, driving each other to go, go, go. You watched Ghost out of the corner of your eye, waiting for him to make a decision. All until the final man walked into the centre of the room, he was surrounded by a group of heavily covered up muscle men toting machine guns like they were little more than big boys with pretend sticks in the playground. The man walked in the centre of them with a confident strut - he looked just like he did in the videos.
“Holy fuck, is that Rousseau?” Soap whispered.
Ghost nodded tightly.
“Brothers! We have done well today, the enemy safehouse has been destroyed and the rest of the soldiers will still be trapped in the warehouse trying to route us out. Let us leave and go to our new base, onwards and upwards my friends!”
The enemy safehouse has been destroyed? Price? Laswell? Were they ok?
You widened your eyes, but you didn’t get much time to think about Price and the others. 
Rousseau had sped over to one of the trucks and once inside, had set off a cataclysm. The doors to the ramp opened, bathing the basement in startling sunlight and from there the explosions began, a loud series of bangs that shook the room like a hurricane, each one unsettling the walls and floor as they got closer. It felt like a tiger leaping ever closer, ready to land straight onto your belly and tear you open. 
What the fuck!
“We need to get out of here!”Ghost roared. “Head for the trucks, we can try to get into the one at the back. 
He kicked at the door and luckily it burst open, allowing you all to run forward and into the next room. Because the room was so long, you were still covered by shadow and no one seemed to notice your group’s appearance. No one was shooting at you anyway. 
Your throat burned as you ran, your mind was racing, intent on following Ghost as he stuck to the walls, keeping yourselves hidden in the darkness. He was racing out ahead while you and Soap tied with each other, running neck and neck and panting like hounds as you propelled yourselves ahead of the blasts. The room was really shaking now and while the last truck began to pull away and ascend up the ramp, your eyes teared up. 
No, no, no. Not like this!
You pumped your legs a little bit harder and Soap did the same, managing to sprint ahead like you were all in a murmuration, moving fluidly and in sync with one another. With that effort made, you all managed to jump onto the last truck, detaching from the wall at the last minute before attaching yourselves to the back. You all grabbed onto what holds that you could, affixing yourselves to the bolts that kept the doors closed and held on for dear life, watching on with horror as you saw the warehouse burning up in the distance, leaving it in a trail of smoke. 
It was then you were finally able to hear the crackle of comms and a blended mixture of broken up accented shouts, German, Korean and English. The others were trying to contact you. 
Had they made it out ok? 
“Gaz, is that you?” Ghost shouted out, trying to adjust his headset while he gripped onto the bolt. “We’re on Rousseau, we’re out of the warehouse. Did your team make it out?”
If you weren’t busy being terrified for everyone’s lives  you would have rolled your eyes. 
“LT, is that you?” Gaz called out, his voice finally coming through clearly. “Are you all ok?”
Ghost didn’t get a chance to say anything to that, he was quickly cut off.
“Lieutenant, respond!” König snarled, his voice snapping out like an angry wolf. 
“We made it out,” Ghost confirmed. “Did you hear what I said? Where are you? We’re following Rousseau, we’re on one of his trucks. His men must’ve been instructed to set this up for him upon capture. They must’ve had a plan to move when they knew we were coming.”
“We made it out, we started heading for the extraction point, but we got cut off by Rousseau’s forces in the woods. He must’ve left men behind to try and stop us from getting out, we got em’ though. We still haven’t heard any word from Price. What direction are you heading in? Should we follow?”
“We got word that they destroyed the safe house,” Soap said. “Price and Laswell might not’ve made it.”
You finally turned and looked up, blinking back at the rush of air as you changed direction and looked at Soap. He looked like a terrified cat that had got itself stuck up a tree. Both of his hands must’ve been white knuckling the bolt from under his gloves - he was holding onto the same one as you, standing over you while you crouched low and hooked your feet into the groove of the bevelled doors. The extra grip was helping your shaking body. 
Why couldn't Ghost have just let you and König pair off? You’d have taken jungle warfare over hanging off the back of a speeding truck anyday. It would have avoided the whole stupid argument back at the tunnel too. In that moment, while you held on for dear life, you realised that there was a lot of things that you’d have wished that could’ve been done differently. 
“Don’t follow us,” Ghost said, taking back control of the line, “Try to find out if anyone made it to the extraction. You hear that, König? Make sure that we can make it out of this, don’t do anything stupid!”
“Hard to say what’s stupid when your definition seems so different to mine,” König snarked.
“König, don’t be a smartass! Just try and find Price so we can get Rousseau,” you growled. 
Ghost tilted his head at you, clearly surprised that you’d been the one to tell him off for that. As much as you were relieved to know he was ok, and as much as you’d like to comfort him, you knew the mission was much bigger than yourselves. Getting everyone out safely and trying to successfully capture Rousseau was the most important thing and you could only do that if you were apart.
The line remained quiet for a second.
“Ok, we’re heading to the extraction again now,” Gaz confirmed. “We’ll let you know when we reach point.”
“Copy, Sergeant.”
You looked up at Ghost and then at Soap, watching as both men struggled with staying stuck to the truck. This wasn’t going to work long term, you could feel your own arms wanting to give out, it wouldn’t be long till you’d all come tumbling off and crashing onto the dirt road. You had to figure out a way to get to a more secure location. 
“Ghost, do you think you can hold on to the truck and try to support my weight at the same time?” You asked.
“Why?” he barked.
“If you hold onto me, I can try and climb up the truck and get myself on top,” you explained. 
“And then what about us?” Soap growled. “All very well sorting out a nice place for yourself up there.”
“If I move up there, then you can crouch next to Ghost and open the door on the side we’re standing on,” you said, glaring up at him. “That way we can all hold it so it doesn’t swing out and you two can climb in and shut it.”
This wasn’t the time for accusations. You waited for them both to share their thoughts, and jumped when the truck hit a bump. It almost sent you all flying. Soap yelped and hugged into the bolt tighter and Ghost grunted. You fumbled as your feet were displaced and wobbled, your hands slipping off of the bolt and sending you sprawling backwards. 
Ghost reached out and grabbed you in the nick of time, just when you thought you were about to be grated parmesan on the side of the pebbled road. You huffed out a breath and grabbed a hold of the bar, swallowing down your pulse as it tried to climb out of your throat. 
“Right, get on with it,” Ghost said, “I can only hold you for so long.”
You shook your head and had to remind yourself of the plan. That close call rocked you.
Without any more interruption, you grabbed onto the bolt on Ghost’s side with both hands and swung your legs up, planting them against the wall while Ghost kept his hand flat against your back. As you got higher up, his support dwindled, but from there you were able to reach around the top and kick your legs against the doors. With one last grunt you were able to get yourself fully on top of the truck, but kept yourself belly down on it, ensuring that you wouldn’t be seen. 
“Ok, I’m gonna hold onto the door now. Open it when Soap’s in position.”
The other two fumbled around, getting themselves steady. After a few moments of contoroting themselves around one another they were able to open the door, it was heavy and it took everything in you not to go flying out with it even with Ghost holding it from his position too, but you were able to stop it just enough so that Ghost and Soap could climb in as they both took turns to hold the door alongside you.
Once they’d disappeared inside and snapped the door shut, you realised that there was a small fault in your plan when you were left gripping on for dear life. Not to mention how much colder it was on top with all the wind rushing past your face. Then there was also the bugs…
“Nice work, Sneak,” Ghost congratulated, voice coming in quiet over the line. “I’m gonna get soap to drill a hole in the ceiling. Have you got your knife with you?”
“Yeah, why?” you asked, frowning as you slowly worked out where he was going with this.
“That should give you something decent to hold onto.”
“Are you serious? Can’t you guys cut a hole in the ceiling for me?” you huffed.
“Who do you think I am, Qui-Gon fuckin’ Jinn?” Soap retorted, you could hear the drill going in the background. “Must’ve forgotten my lightsaber at home. Beyond blowing the thing off, how am I gonna cut a hole in the roof, sneak?”
“I’m not asking you to melt the whole roof off soap, you must be able to make a small hole with that drill, just make a few drill holes and weaken the metal!” you growled. 
“Negative. We need you up there, Sergeant,” Ghost interrupted. “We need someone who can see ahead and tell us when the trucks are stopping or if we leave the forest. If they reach base or they leave us with no cover we need to get ready to jump off and hide.”
You sighed and watched as the drill bit poked its way out behind you, grating through the metal with a sound like grinding teeth. You would need to turn and slide forward a few inches to be able to reach it, but it looked like that was your best way to keep on top of the truck.
Without anymore stalling, you flipped around and watched as it disappeared and appeared a couple times more, forming a ragged little line. That would be enough for your knife to eat through.
You shakily reached behind you and to your knife holster, gripping the handle like a vice in your hands, whatever you did you couldn’t let it fly from your hold. With that in mind you quickly extended your arm and stabbed it through the hole, gritting your teeth as your hand slammed into the metal. That was surely going to bruise,
“Could’ve done with some warning, Sneak,” Soap huffed. “You almost took my finger off.”
“Poor baby, maybe you’d like to swap places,” you retorted. “See how you like holding onto the top of a truck with nothing but your hands.”
“Watch it, or I’ll send that knife flyin’ out,” he barked back.
“Shut up, Soap,” Ghost growled. “Keep the line clear. Sneak, let us know what you see, copy?”
“Copy that, Ghost.”
You hardened your gaze onto the horizon, watching as the trees came waving by and flew into your periphery, and adjusted your position. With both hands firmly wrapped around your knife, you were deadset on keeping your fingers wrapped around it with a snake like constriction. In that moment you were picturing it as Rousseau’s neck, already seeing red as you thought about Price and König and all the shit that you’d been through since chasing after the bastard.
You were going to get him. You were going to make him pay. 
If König, Gaz and Horangi didn’t get back to you soon with good news, then you were fully prepared to unleash hell on him. It didn’t matter what Price was going to do when he found out about you and König, it didn’t matter about the rising blood and seething vitriol that would surely come with the revelation. Price was the one that helped shape you into the soldier you were, he was the one that had gotten you back alive from countless missions, he was your reason for marching on in some of your toughest fights. He cared about you and he believed in you - it was why he was so protective in the first place.
If Price was gone then it wouldn’t be long until the killer met the same fate…of course only after suffering for their actions in the meantime. 
Next part here
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zepskies · 11 months ago
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Smoke Eater - Part 18
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Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader 
Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but he’s also known to break a few hearts. He’s starting to crave something he’s never had, though. Something stable. Something real. 
That’s when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.
🔥 Series Masterlist
Word Count: 4,000 Tags/Warnings: Angst, fluff, brief mentions of the events of Part 13, some ADA Sam, Detective John, and a cliffhanger…
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Part 18: “V for Vendetta”
After that first rocky month, Dean started to improve physically, and so did you emotionally, as he tried his best to let you help him when he needed it. 
In turn, you did your best to gauge his moods; when he truly did need help, and when it was best for you to just be his girlfriend, not his caretaker.
January rolled onwards, and the resulting winter cold snap brought a kind of calm before a storm. Nick Savage still hadn’t been found, but that didn’t mean your worries were over.
Dean knew that this would hang over all of your heads until both Nick and his father were caught and exposed.
Today Dean walked with Sam on his day off, doing a few laps around the neighborhood as part of Dean’s rehab. They knew a police car was stationed nearby, watching them for their safety. It was a bit unnerving, but necessary.
They were walking back into the building when Sam stopped to check the mail. The box for their unit was along the wall in the corridor with several other locked boxes. Sam unlocked theirs and pulled out a rolled-up newspaper, some coupons, and a stray folded note addressed to Dean. Sam’s brows furrowed.
“What’s that, a love note?” Dean asked dryly. He took it from Sam and unfolded the scrap of paper.
20579. Your badge will join your dad’s on the wall.
Both the Fire Department headquarters and the 84th Precinct had a wall to commemorate firefighters and officers who had given their lives in the line of duty. Each of their badges had their own display plaque hung on the respective walls.
In short, the note was a threat.
Sam’s worried frown deepened as he watched Dean’s good mood evaporate. He crumpled up the note and pocket it, before he met his younger brother’s eyes.
“Keep this between us,” he warned. As in, don’t tell you.
Sam shook his head. “Dad needs to know, at least. And you two need to be careful.” 
“That goes for you and Eileen too,” Dean replied. He reached for Sam’s shoulder and squeezed. “Don’t matter that you’re an ADA. Azazel goes after cops and their families. He’s gonna be gunning for an opportunity to get to one of us.”
Sam’s lips pressed together, but he acknowledged that with a nod.
They went back upstairs together, where you were dressed casually and gathering up your purse.
“Heading out somewhere?” Dean asked. Sam shot him a glance, which Dean silently answered with a short nod. He looked back at you when you offered him a smile.
“Yep, we need a few things. Milk, eggs, more Twizzlers, apparently,” you quipped, lightly smacking his stomach. Dean quirked a smile.
“Give me a sec. I’ll go with you,” he said.
You made an uncertain sound. “Didn’t you just get back from a walk? You sure you don’t just want to shower up and relax?”
“I’m good,” said Dean. He knew you didn’t like the idea of him overexerting himself, but he didn’t feel comfortable letting you go out alone. He could tell by the look Sam once again threw his way from the kitchen that he didn’t think it was a good idea either.
Dean slid a hand up your arm. “How about this. I’ll stay in the car. I just want some more fresh air.”
You tilted your head at him, but you conceded. He followed you to the door and held it open for you.
“Can I drive?” Dean hedged.
You chuckled. “Don’t push it, Lieutenant.”
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On the way back from the grocery store, you discreetly eyed Dean’s profile. His knee was bouncing as he stared out the window.
Sometimes he checked the rearview mirror of your Camaro. Sometimes he fiddled with the radio or checked his phone.
It was all nervous behavior you took a catalogue of. By the time you pulled back into the parking lot of Dean’s apartment building, he finally seemed to relax a fraction. You parked the car and turned to him. 
“Okay, what’s the matter?” you asked.
Dean gave you a curious look, but there was an unmistakable tension in his demeanor.
“What do you mean?”
You tried your question a different way. “What’s got you all on edge?”
He didn’t seem to want to answer at first.
“Dean,” you prodded. “Does it have something to do with why you insisted on coming with me, even though I can see that you’re tired?”
His face tightened, but he reached over for your hand. Your fingers curled around his. Now you were getting worried.
“We’ve got the police watching us here, but anything could happen out there,” Dean said. “Until this blows over, I don’t think you should go out by yourself.”
Until this blows over. You wanted to ask when that would be, but you knew he wouldn’t be able to give you an answer.
“Zachariah called me this morning,” you admitted. “He’s standing in for Nick as CEO. He said I have a job waiting for me when I get off medical leave next week. Everyone’s been working from home since the fire, but we’d be going to a new building the company owns downtown.”
Dean tightened up, just like you knew he would. His eyes closed as his head tilted back against the headrest. He let out a long breath through his nose. You stayed quiet, both waiting for what he might say and preparing for him to get upset.
He surprised you by calmly looking over at you again.
“It’s not a good idea. If Nick’s still alive, it means his dad probably knows you know who he is,” he said. “And not for nothin’. Even with Nick out of there, that place’s probably been built on blood money.”
Both were fair points.
“I know. I’m going to find something else, as soon as you’re better,” you said. Dean shook his head and held your hand tighter.
“Don’t let me be an excuse,” he said. His gaze was firm and direct meeting yours. “I need you to start taking care of yourself too, all right? Please.” 
Faced with his earnestness, you couldn’t help but soften. After everything he’d done to save you, to protect you, was it fair of you to keep making him worry?
In the past, you’d felt justified. You couldn’t quit. You needed the money. You could handle it, whatever came next. You would deal with it because you had to.
But maybe this time, you didn’t have to. It wasn’t worth all this.
With that resolve, you let out a breath.
“I’m going to call Zachariah,” you said, “and tell him that I’m working from home, or I quit.”
Dean stared back at you with a measure of surprise.
“I’m not going back,” you said, squeezing his hand. “If he has a problem with that, I’ll use whatever I have left in my savings. Hopefully that’ll be enough until I find a new job.”
After a moment, Dean expelled a breath of relief. He beckoned you over, and carefully as you could over the upholstery, you leaned over and caressed his cheek before you went in for a kiss. He welcomed you, with his hands slipping up your sides and around your back, pressing you into him with a heady warmth.
He paused against your lips after a while. His forehead rested against yours.
“You don’t need to drain your savings. I can help you,” Dean started to say, but you pulled back and held your fingers to his lips.
“You’ve helped me enough. You’re already letting me live with you rent free,” you pointed out. “Let me figure out the rest.”
After a moment, Dean wordlessly agreed. He wanted to argue that you wouldn’t have had to move in with him if not for Azazel putting you in his sights, but at the same time, Dean understood that you’d been providing for yourself for a long time. He respected you for it.
So he just guided you back to him for another slow kiss.
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John Winchester owned a condo approximately 20 minutes from his sons’ apartment. It was the home they’d grown up in after the house fire, over thirty years ago.
John had learned a lot since then. In fact, some might say that he’d become a paranoid bastard.
Aside from a professional alarm system, he’d installed hidden cameras inside and out of his home, and at every window. It meant that even when he was asleep, his eyes were never truly closed.
When the intruder took his first steps into John’s bedroom, the man himself was waiting with a gun cocked and loaded. The safety clicking back made a small sound, but in the silence, it might as well have been a gunshot.
The masked man swiftly turned and ducked, throwing a punch. The scuffle that followed was quick and covered by darkness.
The cameras on “Night Mode” picked up every moment.
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And that was how John later showed video evidence of Alastair Rolston breaking into his condo, and subsequently getting his ass handed to him.
Both men had their fair share of bruises, but at the end of the day, Alastair was the one cuffed to a chair in the bowels of the 84th Precinct. He sat beside his court-appointed lawyer.
Meanwhile, Cas watched the scene from behind the one-way glass window of the interrogation room. Rufus Turner, their Lieutenant, was beside him, along with ADA Sam Winchester. He watched the man his father questioned very carefully. 
“Well, I think you know what this means, Mr. Rolston,” John drawled.
Alastair’s stance in the chair was relaxed, almost unfazed. He gave the detective a wry smile.
“What’s that, John?” he asked.
“I’ve got you dead to rights on attempted murder of a cop,” said John. “It ain’t a good look, my friend.”
“Don’t answer that,” said the lawyer. Alastair glanced at the man, unimpressed, to say the least.
“No fucking shit,” he replied.
“I’d say you’ve got two options,” John pressed forward. He leaned on the table between him and Alastair.
“Did Azazel…excuse me, Daniel Savage, put you up to this? You can answer that question, or I could just skip to the part where you sit in a cell for 20 to life.”
Alastair’s face gave away nothing but calculation and amusement. John nodded, with a grim smile.
“I’ll bet you set the fire at Savage & Co. Trying to get Nick to look like a victim in all this—the consequence of doing business with the likes of Azazel,” he said. “Better yet, I think you’re his favorite hitman. Clean, precise, no tracks left behind, no traces of evidence. Perfect kills. I’ll bet you consider yourself a goddamn artist.”
Alastair lifted his gaze, and John saw the familiar depths of a killer.
“I don’t like setting fires,” said Alastair.
John was nonplussed. “I’m sure you don’t.”
The other man rolled his shoulders.
“It’s all very…messy, you see. Unpredictable.” A smile graced his lips. “But I know someone who does.”
“He’ll give you his employer,” the lawyer said. “The person who ordered the hit.”
“Which hit?” John arched a brow. “I can’t be the only special one. What about Paul Richardson, Jerry Stillwell, Amanda Waller?”
The lawyer shared a look with his client. Alastair rolled his eyes and leaned over to whisper in his ear. After a moment, the lawyer nodded and met John’s gaze.
“He’ll tell you what you want to know, but only for a blanket deal of immunity.”
John could’ve guessed. Alastair smiled once more and leaned back in his seat.
The detective held up a finger and exited the interrogation room. He met Sam’s gaze, and the latter already knew what his father was thinking.
"Give me a minute," Sam said. He went into the room and tried to negotiate with Alastair and his lawyer, but the man wouldn't accept a plea of 20 to 25 years, even to serve all the murders they could charge him with concurrently. Nor would he accept 15 to 20, or even Sam's best deal: 10 to 12.
Sam exited the room and hid his discouragement. He met his father's waiting gaze.
“We can’t give him immunity,” Sam said. “He’s likely the one who committed Azazel’s hits. Not just for the past six months, but for God knows how long, and how many bodies.”
“At this point, it’s the only way we’re getting a chance at Daniel Savage,” John said. “Not just finding him, but pinning him as the mastermind behind the whole operation. Drug trafficking, arson, murders…the whole thing, Sam.”
Sam didn’t like it. No one did, for that matter, but even Rufus heaved a sigh.
“You can’t move forward without a trigger finger willing to testify,” he said.
“Yeah, because hitmen make notoriously credible witnesses,” Sam retorted.
“Do think he set the fires as well?” Cas asked John. “He seemed to imply that he committed the murders, but not the arson.”
John hummed in contemplation.
“We’ll find out. But first, I want a confirmed name from the horse’s mouth,” he said, shifting his attention to Sam. “Can you get me that, son?” 
Sam’s lips pursed.
Within an hour, the paperwork was drawn and the plea deal was arranged. Father and son sat side by side on one side of the interrogation room, while Alastair and his lawyer sat on the other. Alastair finished signing the final document as the cuffs on his wrists jangled.
“All right,” said John. “Tell me what I want to know.”
Alastair smiled and spread his hands as wide as he was able.
“I’m an open book, Johnny. Ask away.”
John leaned forward.
“Let’s start with this,” he said. “Who ordered you to kill me?”
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Nick Savage was unearthed from a luxury apartment in the south of France. He was extradited back the United States and hauled into a courtroom in Lawrence, Kansas for arraignment.
Sam Winchester was the prosecutor on the case. As luck would have it, one of his favorite judges was also assigned for this docket.
“What do we have here?” asked Judge Devereaux. He was a portly man, short and graying, with square black glasses that framed his perpetually surly face. The man now adjusted his glasses so he could read the slip of paper the clerk had just handed to him after reading off the docket.
The charges included four counts of murder in the first degree: the murders-for-hire, enacted by Alastair Rolston.
Followed by attempted murder in the first degree, ten counts of murder in the second degree (those who had lost their lives in the most recent building fire), conspiracy to commit murder, arson, and if that weren’t enough, a charge each of attempted sexual assault and sexual harassment.
When the last two charges were read out loud in the courtroom, Nick looked visibly angry.
Sam glanced over at the defendant with thinly veiled satisfaction. Some days, it was difficult for him to come to work.
Today was not that day.
“All right, that is a laundry list of potential misdeeds,” Judge Deveraux remarked. He looked up at Nick Savage. “How does the defendant plead?”
At the prodding of his lawyer, Amelia Richardson, Nick spoke up.
“Not guilty,” he said. Though he rolled his eyes, as if this was a waste of his time.
“What’s the deal here, Mr. Winchester?” Judge Devereaux asked.
“The primary charge is a murder-for-hire, your Honor,” Sam replied. “Mr. Savage hired a hitman to murder at least five people, and succeeded with four. He also masterminded several arsons. This includes a fire at his own company building, which claimed the lives of ten people and injured several others. This is all part of a larger connection to organized crime, which the People intend to prove in our case. Due to the nature of the charges, and the defendant clearly being a flight risk, we seek his remand to custody without bail.”
The judge raised his brows. He turned to the defendant’s lawyer.
“What about it, Miss Richardson?”
Amelia shot Sam a glance, but she replied to the judge.
“What we have here is a conflict of interest, your Honor,” she said. “Detective John Winchester has a vendetta against my client. Therefore, Mr. Winchester should recuse himself. It’s a family affair, Judge, and they have no evidence for any of these charges, except for the testimony of a confessed murderer.”
“It’s called prosecutorial discretion,” Sam cut in. “Our evidence goes beyond Mr. Rolston’s testimony and will more than support our case. I’ve also tried my father’s cases before, your Honor. This defendant is no different.”
The judge peered closer at the docket with incredulous eyes.
“Except for the fact that one of the attempted murders was on your father. John Winchester?” Judge Devereaux actually chuckled. “Oh, Mr. Savage. Many have tried and failed on that regard.”
“Judge,” Amelia tried, but Devereaux waved her off. Sam took in that small victory without giving anything away outwardly. The fact that John was on the docket as a “victim” was easily Sam’s biggest challenge in this arraignment, but he just couldn’t hand this off to another prosecutor.
“And what’re these last charges about?” the judge asked.
“Mr. Savage attempted to sexually assault one of his employees at a company Christmas party in the defendant’s home, your Honor,” Sam replied. His gaze once again cut over to Nick, who glared back at him with a sneer.
“That’s a goddamn lie!” Nick shouted.
Amelia grabbed his arm and tried to shut him up, but Nick jerked out of her grasp.
“Put a gag on your client or I will, Miss Richardson,” Devereaux warned with a deepening frown.
“Hey,” Amelia hissed a whisper, grabbing the sleeve of Nick’s suit jacket this time. “Get it together and shut your mouth. Remember where you are.”
He ignored her to try and speak to the judge himself. 
“That bitch tased me. Did she tell you that?” Nick levied Sam a look, before he turned back to Devereaux. “Yeah, she assaulted me, Judge. So that charge is fucking bogus.”
“I’ve heard quite enough!” Devereaux snapped. He raised his gavel and slammed it down loud enough for Nick to flinch. “The defendant is remanded to custody, without bail.”
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It was more satisfying than John would admit.
While the development wasn’t exactly what he had expected, having Daniel Savage’s son dragged out of his new prison home to sit in another musty holding cell was the highlight of the new year.
This was the poor excuse for a man who’d given him such a headache these past few months. This was the little shit that nearly got his son killed, and who’d been terrorizing you for months, if not years.
But he would be a means to an end.
“I’ll tell ya what, Nick. You don’t look like a man that could organize a handful of murders and arsons, but here we are,” John said.
He scratched the back of his head and sat on the corner of the desk. Sam was seated across from Nick, and Cas was hanging back within the cell, watching the exchange (and watching Nick’s reactions for any tells).
On the other side sat Nick himself, dressed down in his gray prison garb. It was a far cry from the $5,000 suit he wore in the arraignment. Next to him was his lawyer, Amelia Richardson.
“Is there a question in there somewhere?” she asked. She shot Sam a glance.
They had dated in law school for a few months. It had ended abruptly when her husband returned from Afghanistan. It had been a shock to both of them, since the man had been presumed dead.
Clearly, Sam had moved on since then. He was happier with Eileen than he ever was, but he could tell that Amelia had never quite recovered from the “what could’ve been” of their relationship.
Still, Sam had set all that aside the moment he stepped into this room. He watched his father work.
“Why did you set fire to your own building?” John asked.
He’d expected Nick to be more explosive with his denials, but the man was quietly simmering, like he just wanted the questioning to be over. It reminded John of when his sons were teenagers. Maybe he hadn’t been the perfect father, but intuition was telling him something…
“You didn’t do it, did you?” John mused. “At least, not that fire.”
It was interesting, however, that Alastair had pinned the Savage & Co. fire on the son—that Nick had started it himself, along with the other arsons. Alastair had just been the muscle, committing the murders and the brandings on the victims.
John wasn’t so sure he believed that. He leaned in a bit and gave Nick a wry smile.
“Did Daddy do that one for ya?” he asked.
At that, Nick held firm. “My father has nothing to do with this.”
Hmm, a bit of familial loyalty? Maybe trying to prove himself, John detected. How far is he willing to go to protect his dad?
“So you did do it, along with the other arsons,” John said.
“Are you trying to get him to confess without a plea deal?” Amelia snarked.
“I’m trying to figure out how badly this kid wants to stay out of jail for the rest of his life,” John said.
“I’m not a fucking kid,” Nick grumbled.
“If you have something for us on Daniel Savage, then we’re willing to listen,” Sam added. “Do you really want to spend the rest of your life in jail?”
Nick crossed his arms, clearly uncooperative.
Sam narrowed his gaze. “This is your last chance, Nick.”
“You don’t have anything on me except for the word of a murdering felon,” Nick retorted. “I’ll beat this trial in a few months and I’ll be out free…but if you really want to know, I’ll let you in on a little something.”
He leaned in, meeting John’s eyes.
“Dad retaliates,” said Nick. “I think you know that best of all, Detective. This time, I think it’s one son for another. And you’ve got two to pick from.”
“Nick,” Amelia warned, but he ignored her.
He glanced at a carefully stoic Sam before he smirked in John’s face, which had become devoid of all humor and revealed the stoniness underneath.
“If I were a betting guy, I’d put my money on the one that had a fucking building fall on him.”
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After leaving the county jail, John drove Sam and Cas back to his sons’ apartment. They couldn’t treat Nick’s warning as an idle threat.
Sam was the prosecutor on the case. He wasn’t willing to step down, so the best they could do for him was give him a police security detail that would have to be with him at all times. However, all three men agreed that you, Dean, and Eileen needed to be put in protective custody during the trial.
“Damn it, Dean,” Sam muttered. His brother wasn’t answering his cell.
“Try him again,” said John.
“Is Eileen still at work?” Cas asked.
“Yeah, but she’s talking to the principal now about a temporary replacement for her classes,” Sam replied. He was worried about her safety, but he was also worried about you and Dean. Neither of you were answering your cell phones.
He later let John and Cas into his apartment, where all looked normal and clean.
“Dean!” Sam called out. He was just about to search the apartment when the man came out of his room, looking freshly showered.
“Hey, what’s up?” said Dean. “The gang’s all here, huh?”
“I’ve been calling you for an hour. Where’ve you been?” Sam asked in annoyance, though it was edged with a hint of more that tipped off Dean.
He sensed the tension in the room between his brother, his father, and his friend. He frowned.
“I had a doctor’s appointment. Why?”
John explained the latest round of questioning with Nick Savage, and his most recent threat. John asked where you were right now, if not in the apartment. Dean’s expression shifted to one of worry as he went to find his cell phone.
“She had a job interview,” he admitted, scrolling through his phone to find your name. “She couldn’t reschedule it, else she would’ve gone with me.”
He’d been uneasy about you going to the interview by yourself, but you hadn’t wanted him to change his appointment, and you had assured him it was only a few minutes away…
Dean held the phone to his ear and waited what felt like an eternity as it rang.
Pick up. Pick up, damn it.
Finally, the line connected.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted…but you didn’t answer.
“You there?” he asked. There was a pit forming in his stomach when he glanced up at John. His father met his gaze with furrowed brows that betrayed concern.
The line was silent for one more painful moment. Dean opened his mouth to call out to you again, but a smooth voice interrupted.
“Dean, Dean, Dean,” a man replied. “Forgetting something?”
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AN: 🫣 Sorry lol.
But the next chapter will bring the final showdown...
Next Time:
Dean’s heart began to pound. His mouth parted, but for a moment, the words wouldn’t escape.
“Who is this?” he said. His voice was a hint unsteady.
“I think you know, son,” the man replied.
Keep Reading: PART 19
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Dean Winchester Masterlist
Main Masterlist
Series Tag List (Part 1):
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nahoney22 · 6 months ago
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i humbly ask for some wrecker smut with the prompts “Let me distract you” and “Come on, you can be louder. It’s just us.”
congrats on 4500! that’s huge!
Distractions*** 🌊
🫧 Pairings: Wrecker X Female Reader
word count: 2.7k
prompts:
“Let me distract you.”
“Come on, you can be louder. It’s just us.”
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warnings: NSFW, 18+ only. Soft Smut, outdoor sex, p in v sex, cowgirl and missionary positions, creampie, explicit language, dirty talk, pet names, nipple licking/sucking, nudity, size kink, big dick, mutual pining, friends to lovers, first kiss, after care, fluff, little bit of angst to start where reader feels unfulfilled.
When Wrecker finds you in deep thought and with the feelings he has for you, maybe tonight was the perfect time to confess how he feels. Or, to even distract you.
A/N sorry for the wait - hope this is okay @yeehawgeek 💜
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It wasn’t often that you found yourself in deep thought, contemplating life and what had brought you to this precise moment. Yet here you are, lying in the tall grass that bends under your weight, eyes gazing at the stars as a deep sigh parts your lips. The cool night air is crisp against your skin, and the rustling of leaves in the gentle breeze only adds to the serenity.
Nothing seemed wrong, at least not that you were aware of, but you felt unfulfilled. Here you lay on a moon you hadn’t even heard of, accompanied by some of the best people you had ever met. Sure, things were rocky and tedious at the start, but now… life was calm. Settled. Maybe that’s what the issue was.
All the excitement of missions had given you a thrill, a sense of purpose and urgency. But now, with the thrill gone, you found yourself drifting, doing nothing with your time.
“What ya doing all the way out here?” A voice snaps you out of your melancholy thoughts, making you gasp and sit up. You instantly relax when Wrecker strides towards you, stopping at your side, his presence comforting and familiar.
“Just thinking,” you hum, brushing stray strands of grass from your clothes. “Want to join me?”
“Sure!” Wrecker lays down beside you, his large frame settling comfortably a couple of inches away from your shoulder. He tucks his arm under his head as a pillow and looks to the stars with you in a nice silence.
He was one of the best things about your life, in all honesty. There was a spark, an undeniable attraction between you both, yet nothing was ever discussed about it. You both weren’t shy to give each other cuddles here and there, and sometimes the odd celebratory kiss on the cheek that had your mind whirling. But that was it.
You notice that he’s turned his attention away from the stars to look at you, and so you follow his actions and do the same. “Is everything okay?” he asks gently, his voice soft with genuine concern.
“Yeah,” you say quietly, closing your eyes for a moment before continuing, “I’m just thinking.”
He chuckles softly. “You already said that.”
Ah, that you did. “Sorry.”
“No need. But are ya thinking about anything in particular?” His voice is a loud whisper, a sweet attempt to not break the quiet of the night.
You blink and shrug, feeling the weight of your thoughts pressing down on you. “I just feel like I miss things.” You start, turning your attention back to the stars, their distant light somehow comforting. “I miss life where we didn’t know what was going to happen next. Aside from the whole Omega getting captured and stuff, of course.” You say quickly, hoping it didn’t seem weird, but he nods for you to continue.
“I don’t know, Wrecker,” you sigh exasperatedly, tugging the grass out from beside you, the blades slipping easily between your fingers. “I’m just... unfulfilled.”
Wrecker is silent for a moment, his presence warm and reassuring. “It’s okay to feel that way,” he finally says, his voice a soft rumble in the quiet night. “We’ve been through a lot, and things have changed. It’s normal to miss the excitement, even if it was dangerous.”
The other boys often disregarded Wrecker’s intelligence quite a lot of the time but with you, you saw more than what he often portrayed. Just like now. His words were wise and sweet, a comforting balm.
You nod, appreciating his understanding. “I guess I just don’t know what to do with myself now that things are so... stable.”
Wrecker turns onto his side to face you, his eyes gentle and kind, reflecting the starlight. “You’re not alone in this. We all feel it sometimes. But maybe it’s a chance to find new things that make us happy.”
A small smile tugs at your lips. “Like what?”
He grins, his natural smile shining through and lighting up his features. “Like spending more time together, finding our own new adventures! Even if they’re not as crazy as the old ones.”
You chuckle softly, the sound mingling with the night breeze. “Yeah, I suppose you’re right.”
He reaches out, his large hand enveloping yours in a comforting hold, his touch grounding you. “We’ll figure it out.”
Looking into his eyes, you feel a sense of peace settle over you, as well as a soft flutter in your chest. “Thank you, Wrecker. That means a lot.”
As the two of you turn your attention back to the stars, basking in the tranquility of it all, you start to ponder why Wrecker had come all the way out here for you.
“So,” you start, trying to stop yourself from gushing at the thought of him looking for you, “I don’t think you came out here just to listen to me whine about my non-existent problems. Why’d you come?”
He chuckles again, his rough and large hands gliding almost gracefully over the tall grass as he turns his head to you. “I just wanted to make sure you’re alright and…”
You raise a brow. “And?” you ask, noticing the almost nervous look on his handsome face.
“To see if there was anything I could do.”
“Is there anything you could do?” Your voice suddenly grows quieter as you lock eyes, a silent conversation flickering between you.
You watch as his tongue dabs his lips, an innocent gesture that makes the tips of your fingers tingle and your cheeks burn. “Let me distract you,” he finally answers after a brief silence, his tone low and somewhat... seductive.
You inhale a sharp breath. “How would you do that?”
He smiles softly, yet his eyes burn with hunger. A hunger for you. “With a kiss.”
Suddenly, you can feel the warmth of his body so close to yours, the cold night suddenly feeling much warmer. Your mind races as the unspoken attraction between you both was clearly now out in the open.
He watches you for a moment and as you give a subtle nod, slowly, he moves closer. His hand reaches up to gently cradle your face. To others, they may expect his touch to be rough and demanding but you knew Wrecker. You were already familiar with how gentle he was when you both cuddled and tonight was no exception. Gasping under his touch, you almost melt as you can feel his breath, warm, inviting and oddly minty.
Your eyes flutter closed, anticipation building as he places one hand at the side of your head as he leans over you… and then leans in.
His lips are soft, but tentative. You were fairly certain his eyes were closed too as when you gently place the tips of your fingers to his jaw, he gasps quietly as if the touch shocked him. But it was the spark between you both that ignites into something more passionate.
You respond eagerly, your hands moving finding their way to his broad and muscular shoulders, feeling the strength and warmth beneath your fingertips. His body tenses under your touch, a silent indication of his own rising desire. Propping yourself up on your elbows, it is you who imitates a deeper kiss; raw and intense.
Eventually, as you break apart for air, you look into his eyes. Both of you are breathing heavily as he asks, “Was that enough of a distraction?”
It was, absolutely. Yet, being alone with him under the stars made you feel something else other than the clear love you have for him: lust.
With shy eyes, you lick your lower lip and suppress the moan as you still could taste his lips on yours and say, “What if I say no?”
He raises his scarred brow, a nervous smile tugging at his lips. “Was it, uh, not good enough?”
“It was,” you say swiftly before taking a leap of faith as you gently push on his shoulders, allowing him to move back onto his back again. He’s about to ask what you were doing but halts speaking as you swing one leg over the side of him, straddling him comfortably. You see the rise and fall of his chest, his hands helplessly in the air as he doesn’t quite know where to place them, and his mouth agape in awe.
“But what if I said it wasn’t ‘enough’?” you hint, head tilting to the side as you find courage in knowing what to do next, which is to slowly remove your shirt.
He watches you, eyes widening as you pull your shirt off from over your head, exposing yourself to him. It wasn’t surprising that you weren’t wearing a bra, given the late hour, maybe even the early hours of the morning when you should have been sleeping. But he didn’t care. In fact, it took him a good moment or two to remember to breathe. “You… you’re…”
But he can’t think of the words, and instead, grabs at your hips before his lips descend upon yours once again, his tongue lapping at your lower lip as it begs for entrance, which you so happily grant.
You moan into his mouth, his tongue wrapping and fighting with yours as his left hand trails up your body, cupping your breasts and gently gliding his thumb over your stiffening nipples (you’re convinced it wasn’t just the cold air that was making them so hard).
His touch sends shivers down your spine, and you can’t help but arch into his hand, craving more. You break the kiss, panting softly against his lips, and then stand up, your fingers trembling with anticipation as you unbutton your pants. You slide them down slowly, letting them pool at your feet before stepping out of them, standing before him in just your panties.
His eyes roam over your body, darkening with desire. “You’re so beautiful,” he murmurs, looking at you as if you were a deity.
You smile, feeling a rush of heat spread through you at his words. Then, with deliberate slowness, you hook your thumbs into the waistband of your panties and slide them down, exposing yourself completely to him.
His breath hitches, and you can see the raw hunger in his eyes as he palms his cock over his pants eagerly. Kriff, he looked huge. Now that’s not so surprising either.
You lower yourself back down, straddling him once more, feeling the hard length of him pressing against you through his pants. Body tingling, you began to grind your hips slowly, eliciting a deep groan from him.
“Is this what ya want babe?” He asks with a slight husk to his tone, his eyes looking down as your pussy rubs up against him.
“I do,” you whisper, entrancing him, “do you?”
“There’s nothing in this galaxy that would make me say no.” He replies, his hands moving to your hips, guiding your movements.
With careful hands, you began reaching down to unfasten his pants, your fingers brushing against the hard bulge that strains against the fabric that you then politely tug, hoping he gets the hint.
And he does. He lifts his hips to help you, and soon enough you have his pants and underwear pushed down, freeing his thick,hard and big length. Very, big.
Your eyes widen slightly at the sight, but the thrill of anticipation outweighs any hesitation. It was easily possible to wrap maybe two, three hands around his cock and maybe even have room to spare. A part of you thought maybe his large stature and muscles would perhaps be there to compensate him… clearly not.
He takes a hold of his cock, slowly stroking it as he watches you watch him. “Does it make you nervous?”
No. You were excited. Horny. Eager.
Therefore answering his question, you position yourself above him, the tip of his cock brushing against your wet folds, and slowly lower yourself down, taking him inch by inch.
The feeling of him stretching you, filling you completely, makes you moan softly, your hands resting on his chest for support. He grunts, eyes tightly closing as his hands grip your hips as he helps guide you down until you’re fully seated on him.
“Fuck, you feel good,” he groans, his voice strained with pleasure.
You begin to move, slowly at first, lifting yourself up before sinking back down, setting a steady rhythm. There’s a small sting to it but each time you take him deep inside you, the stinging fades and is overridden with a wave of pleasure, and your moans grow more frequent, more desperate.
Wrecker’s hands roam your body, one hand coming up to cup your breast, his thumb teasing your nipple before he leans forward and takes it between his lips, his tongue teasing and poking it while the other rests on your hip. “You can be louder,” he rasps, his voice thick with lust as he sucks on your tits hungrily. “It’s just us.”
His words, his actions spur you on, and you let yourself go, moaning his name, crying out with each thrust you drove down on him. The friction of his cock inside you, the way he stretches you, fills you, drives you wild with need.
“Wrecker, oh, oh fuuuck,” you pant, your movements becoming more frantic as you ride him, the pressure building inside you as your pace changes from up and down to forward and back.
“You feel so good,” he growls as he leans back to allow his hips to buck up to meet yours with a demanding pace, piercing himself deeper into you. “So fuckin’ perfect.”
You lean down, capturing his lips in a searing kiss, your tongues tangling together as you both move in perfect harmony. The sound of your wetness, the slap of skin against skin, fills the night air.
“I’m close,” you whimper against his lips, almost embarrassed that you were so quick to cum but fuck, Wrecker was making your body tremble and making you see stars even with your eyes closed.
“Cum for me, pretty girl.” He urges, his voice a soft command. “I want to feel you cum around me.”
His words push you over the edge, and with a cry, you climax, your walls clenching around him, milking his cock as wave after wave of pleasure crashes over you.
Wrecker’s grip tightens on your hips, and with a deep, guttural groan of his own, he thrusts up into you one last time, his large cock pulsing as he spills himself deep inside you. The feeling of his warmth seed filling you only boosts your own high, prolonging the ecstasy.
As you both come down from the high, you collapse against him, your bodies slick with sweat. He wraps his arms around you, holding you close. “That was… incredible,” you murmur, your voice shaky.
He chuckles softly, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Yeah, it was.”
But, the feeling of the heat of the moment doesn’t end for you. You lean in for another kiss, your lips meeting softly before you pull back just enough to whisper, “I want more.”
“I have to more give,” he pants, eyes blown with a renewed desire. “Anything you want.”
He instructs you to lie back and so you climb off him and lay in the tall grass once again and this time, watch in awe as he stands and strips himself completely bare.The starlight bathes his skin, casting a soft, ethereal glow over his build. You may have looked like a deity to him but he looked like a God to you as the cool air kisses both of your skin.
He crouches down in front of you, his cock glistening with both of your combined juices as he hooks your leg with his thigh and spreads you open. He positions himself again, his tip brushing over your aching clit that makes your whole body twitch before he slots back into you with a hefty moan.
“You’re so big,” you whine in pleasure as the sensation of his cock filling you completely again is almost overwhelming.
“You can take it,” he groans, his hands gripping your hips again. “You’re doing so good.” He praises.
He locks you in, leaning over you as he begins his slow and loving ruts against your pussy.
You’re already tender but it was a feeling that had you craving more. Your legs wrap around his waist, one hand on his shoulder and one on the back of his head as you both succumb to the stars without a care in the galaxy. Maybe this was your fulfillment
All what mattered right now, was you and him.
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More Wrecker Works
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kcthelazyartist · 2 months ago
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Something of note is the ‘MCGUCKET’ code on thisisnotawebsite.com and how the song  further confirms that Fiddleford is the reason for Bill not getting Ford in the end. This could either be just plot related [As Fidds leads to his downfall] but is more likely in a romantic sense as it references the singer not being married due to the other. 
This could be just making fun of Fidds or be from Fidds’ perspective, but as Fidds won in the end and Bill lost Ford this is unlikely. Instead, it's likely Bill showing his frustration at Fidds getting in between him and Ford.
This could also imply two things, Fidds being too wary and perspective got in the way of everything, or Ford had feelings for Fidds instead of Bill.
In regards to Ford changing the story from ‘A Tale of Two Stans’ to ‘The Last Mabelcorn,’ when Ford was pushed through the portal queer people were about 4-6 years away from being legalised and it was very looked down upon. Of course when he first arrives home he is unaware of the current state of queer politics and is going to assume it will be the same as when he left. 
This could be an explanation as to why he changed the position to something less intimate. Alongside the wording used around him saying he’s glad he's friends with F with the ‘…’ before explaining that Fidds would be terrifying as an enemy, as well as Bill constantly mentioning ‘the hillbilly’ and putting him above Ford’s own father, his feelings towards Fiddleford are very suspicious.
Another suspicious thing on his end is that he writes literal pages about gifts he is given by Fiddleford and Bill at one point [The squash, the gloves and snowglobe, the axolotl…]
@hugenthusiast recently made a post discussing the line, ‘Go back to your doting family and a life of fear and compromise,’ and the queer undertones and comphet feel around the phrase. I would like to expand on this idea and how queer the context actually is.
Starting off with the line directly after, “I weep not for our failed partnership, but for the golden opportunity thrown away! To think I considered him a friend! I know my true friend. It is my Muse.’ This line adds more context that makes the line they pointed at that much more queer, Ford telling Fidds to go back to his family then saying he isnt crying over their partnership but something else makes it sound like a breakup. Ford then compares his friendship to Bill’s, whom he has a queer relationship with.
Combining this with the full page rant and how he was willing to tell Fiddleford about his muse even after years of manipulation and it just feels like a breakup. Ford throwing away the ring also adds to this as it mimics people throwing away things related to their ex and another thing that mimics a breakup is Ford calling Fidds names.
Now going back to the line @hugenthusiast points out, whilst fear and compromise in this context is supposed to be about the portal it is a bit of a double-sided phrase as compromise can mean making do with less than ideal circumstances and being married to someone you have no interest in absolutely fits that, and the fear of outing was very real during this period of time.
‘Doting family’ is also interesting as mixed with the second half of that line it seems as though taking away the fear and compromise would alter his relationship with his family, whom later turn their backs on him, showing how rocky their relationship is and his family's bias’ as they don't even try to help him. I feel like this mixed with how he chooses not to go back really says something, ford calls his family doting yet he doesn't return to them?
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waklman · 1 year ago
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In The Stands
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summary: bradley makes sure you know that you're his biggest fangirl.
pairing: bradley bradshaw x female reader.
warnings: no use of y/n. fluff, mentions of sex. bradley is a biter idc!! 18+ blog in general.
olympic swimmer au
take your marks masterlist.
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While you would love to say that you were Bradley’s biggest fan, you were well aware that it was a title you had to earn rather than be automatically granted as his girlfriend. 
Though you had to admit, it was definitely a struggle to stay afloat in the rocky waters comprised of Bradley's fangirls. After all, they were always a bit extreme when it came to exhausting their free time towards deep-diving into your boyfriend’s life. 
The unwavering adoration they had for their favorite swimmer propelled them to know even the most obscure details about him—from which energy drinks he chugged before a medley to which brand of underwear he wore.
Anyone would have fallen to your knees like you did after finding out other girls knew of your boyfriend’s love for Calvin Klein. 
So what better way to take your righteous title as his number one fan from under their noses, than to corner the athlete after practice—demand said athlete to surrender unfounded information about himself—and transcribe every single word that leaves his mouth right into your notes app.
Rest assured, Bradley was more than pleased to have you perched on his muscled thigh while he was drying off on the rest bench. Enough so, that he started to run a line of kisses from your shoulder up to the familiar spot behind your ear as he diligently attends to your flurry of questions. 
“If you could switch bodies with anyone for a day, who would it be? And what would be the first thing you do?” You make sure to specify, thumbs eagerly hovering over your phone’s keyboard. 
“Easy, Seresin. And I’d hop out the nearest window,” he quietly hums, trailing his nose along your shoulder blade before capturing a piece of your flesh between his teeth, out of boredom. 
Too engrossed with the task at hand, his actions all go unnoticed by you. Luckily for Bradley, the rest of his team coming up for air at the starting blocks are also oblivious to it.
“…Seresin,” you absentmindedly mutter to yourself, eyes searching for ‘S’ on your keyboard. Hearing that, Bradley’s mouth latches onto an untouched spot near your pulse.
Instead of acknowledging the intentional nip, you hastily pound the backspace button to correct your misspell of ‘nearest window’ with a huff. 
About twenty minutes into your interrogation, the frustration stitching your brows together gradually lets up with Bradley’s cooperation. And between each question, the swimmer leans back, face glowing with a grin as he surveys the marks scattered across the right side of your neck. 
Readjusting yourself in his lap, you let out a relieved breath. “Okay, last one. What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re bored?” 
Bradley smiles against the curve of your neck, sheepish response weighing down his tongue. “M’ not sure if you wanna know my answer to that sweetheart.”
Stuck in interviewer mode, the insinuation goes flying right over your head and you twist your neck to shoot him an offended look.
“Yes I do! Did you know your fans on twitter have baby pictures of you that I haven’t even seen before?! I’m like, the worst fan ever!” You complain, accidentally veering off on a tangent. 
At the mention of your rank in his fanbase, Bradley sighs, playful expression fading from his face. “Bubbles, is that what this is all about?” 
Instead of answering him, you quietly remain seated on his leg like some empty ventriloquist doll, wooden legs stiffly hung over his knee and hinged mouth clamped shut because that’s exactly what this is all about. 
Taking the nervous dart of your eyes into account, Bradley pries your fingers off your overheated phone, dropping it inside the mesh swim bag by his feet. 
Sometimes, Bradley forgets that you’re unaware of his disinterest for things like that—the special attention from journalists, the throng of girls gathered outside venues to see him, and the endless clamoring for his signature. Because a part of him assumed that you already knew that.
It was in moments where his head broke the surface of the water, that Bradley knew he never needed fulfillment from other people—not when he instinctively searched for your proud face in the stands, rather than checking his own team’s placement on the scoreboard.
Turning you in his lap to face him, Bradley leans in to kiss your nose, making it scrunch under contact. “I don’t know why you think you got competition. I’m pretty sure you’re the only girl I take up to my room after a win,” he lightly teases, poking your shoulder. 
Slowly, a shy smile makes its way to your face. “I’d hope that I’m the only one. If not, we're gonna have some problems,” you playfully warn, kicking his ankle.
“Uh oh. We might have some problems on our hands,” Bradley shrugs, struggling to contain his laugh in his throat. 
“Hey! That’s—that’s not funny,” you break out into a fit of giggles, prompting him to join you with a slap to his bare chest. 
With you bending forward to simmer your laughter, Bradley takes the chance to extend his arm back into his bag, plucking your phone from the mess of swim caps and snacks.
All you do is confusingly look on as he types in your passcode, large thumb swerving to open the camera app.
“What are you—” 
The words instantly die on your tongue when he flips your phone, and you notice the litter of bite marks on your neckline.
“You did not!” You shriek, hand flying to touch your bruised skin in disbelief.
“Oh but I did Bubbles, for my biggest fan,” he settles with a shameless grin, clicking the side of the device to snap a picture.
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note: i will say although i sprinkle random swimming analogies in all the fics for this au i had the most fun doing it here hehe. as always, thank you for reading, and reblog are greatly appreciated!
join the taglist for this series here or follow me on @waklman-library and turn on notifs to be notified when i post!
tags: @Genius2050@eli2447 @katieshook02 @mak-32 @domeafavour505 @s-u-t @averyhotchner @et-homephone @sgt-barnesveins @olymosity @wkndwlff @diorrfairy @cruelmissdior @eternallyvenus @laneylovesglen @queerqueenlynn @taytaylala12 @sushiwriterhere @ravenhood2792 @Natdrunk @theweekndhistorybook @goosterroose @Moon42flight
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fickle-tiction · 1 year ago
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For Old Time’s Sake
“Ladies and Gentleman, I think Batman might be down for the count.” Clark was pretending to hold a microphone up to his mouth and speaking into it like he was an announcer. “Ohhhh! Nope! He’s up! That is going to hurt tomorrow.”
The corner of Bruce’s mouth pulls up into a smile at Clark’s antics as he circles Diana on the sparring mat. He dodges left as she makes a grab for him, grabbing her arm and using her own momentum to flip her over his back.
“And down goes Wonder Woman!”
Bruce drapes his body over Diana’s to try and pin her down, but she quickly reverses their positions and has Bruce in an armbar before he can even blink.
“I thought we said no powers.” Bruce grunts, trying to free his arm to no avail.
“I can’t help that I’m stronger than you.” 
Bruce lets out a growl, but he doesn’t deny it. Instead, he uses every bit of training he can remember and slips out of Diana’s hold. He springs to his feet and is about to execute a flying kick when a voice catches him off guard and has him freezing in his tracks.
“You’re getting slow, old man.”
Bruce whirls around to see his second oldest son standing at the edge of the mat, arms folded across his chest as he watches the match.
“Jason?” Bruce asks before a strong pair of thighs wrap around his neck and slam him down onto the mat. Bruce wheezes as the wind is knocked out of him and doesn’t bother fighting the hold. He merely taps Diana’s thigh twice in quick succession and she releases him.
“Wonder Woman wins again! And the crowd goes wild! Ahhhhhhh!”
“Is everything okay?” Bruce asks, eyes on his son even as he accepts Diana’s hand up.
“Alfred said you were down here training.” That didn’t explain why he was at the house in the first place, but Bruce wasn’t going to push. “I couldn’t pass up the chance to see you get your ass kicked. I had no idea Wonder Woman would be here.” Jason barreled straight past Bruce to get to Diana, a charming smile on his face that Bruce couldn’t remember ever seeing. “It’s so great to meet you. I’m Jason.”
Diana let out a soft gasp of delight as she shook hands with Bruce’s son. “Diana. We have heard so much about you. It is wonderful to finally meet you!”
“Hey Jason, I’m Clark.” Clark also shook hands with Bruce’s son, reveling in this rare glimpse into their friend's personal life.
“I can’t believe you’re friends with Wonder Woman and Superman.” Jason directed at Bruce. “Seriously, why do you guys hang out with him?” This last bit was naturally directed at Clark and Diana.
Clark barked out a surprised laugh. “For his winning personality.” Bruce scowled, and Clark nodded in his direction with a grin. “Obviously.”
Jason snorted and Diana tsk’d, swatting at Clark’s arm even though she was clearly trying not to laugh too.
“Okay.” Bruce said loudly, clapping his hands together to capture everyone’s attention. “The three of you meeting is a terrible idea.” Clark and Diana’s favorite pastime seemed to be teasing Bruce, and them teaming up with Jason was just asking for trouble. It would be best to kick Clark and Diana out and herd Jason upstairs for tea with Alfred. “Break it up. Everyone out.”
Jason gasps, clutching his chest, and Bruce’s attention is once again zeroed in on him. “You’d kick out your own son?” Bruce’s brain temporarily goes offline when Jason says the S word, despite his teasing tone.
“I---” Bruce may be a man of few words, but he is never at a loss for words. Until now. He knows Jason is just teasing him, but things are still so rocky between the two of them and he’s always afraid of overstepping and scaring Jason off.
“Of course not.” Clark says forcefully, clapping a hand on both Bruce and Jason’s shoulders. Clark didn’t know Bruce especially well, but he did know that he wasn’t the best at expressing himself and he clearly didn’t mean he was going to kick Jason out. He probably just wanted some alone time with what was clearly a surprise visit from his son. Bruce kept his personal life close to his chest; Clark and Diana were surprised he even invited them to the cave to spar in the first place. “We were just finishing up here. You two go catch up. We can show ourselves out.”
“And miss me wiping the floor with him?” Jason’s grin is cocky but his posture is stiff, as though he’s afraid Bruce might really kick him out...or that Clark and Diana might leave him alone with Bruce. “That is, if you’re up for it Old Man.”
Bruce resists the urge to call for Alfred to check his blood for traces of toxins; even though this clearly must be some kind of hallucination. Jason is here. In the cave. And he wants to spend time with him. (Sure, by “Spend time with him” he means spar with him and inflict damage on him, but he would take what he could get.) This must be a new strain of Scarecrow’s toxin.
Bruce mentally shakes those thoughts off, knowing he’s being paranoid and that he is in real danger of chasing his son away with his paranoid thought process. “You really think you can take me?” He asks, mimicking Jason’s cocky smirk and throwing in a raised eyebrow.
“I’m not a skinny 15 year old anymore.” Bruce buried down the burning guilt that rose at those words. He knew Jason wasn’t trying to taunt him, and was just making friendly trash talk. Those were his own issues to deal with, and he would bury them until he had time to sort them out. Preferably in 20-30 years when he was a crazy old man wandering around the manor alone and could properly express his emotions. 
“First one to tap out wins?” Bruce suggested.
“You’re on.”
They shake hands in the middle of the mat; Diana and Clark cleared off to the edges at some point in their exchange but Bruce couldn’t spare them more than a passing thought. Someone went “Ding ding ding” and then Jason was lunging at him.
“What the hell have you been eating?” Bruce grunted, rolling out from under Jason’s bulk and pressing a knee into the small of his back to try and keep him down.
Jason’s only response was a snort of laughter. He managed to get his arms under himself and surged up, sending Bruce toppling off his back. Bruce popped up before Jason had a chance to pin him down, and Jason had to throw himself out of the way of the foot that came flying at his stomach.
They danced around each other for the next few minutes, each throwing the occasional punch or kick. Clark kept up a constant stream of narration and Diana alternated who she was rooting for seemingly at random. Bruce couldn’t wipe the smile off of his face as he ducked and weaved.
“What was that move you used to do all the time?” Jason asked, ducking the fist that came flying at his face as soon as he finished speaking.
“Elaborate.” Bruce did a back flip to avoid Jason’s attempt at grabbing him.
“You know the one.” Jason’s tone should have been setting off warning bells, but Bruce was too busy trying to avoid being tackled to the ground by 250 pounds of solid muscle to pick up on it. “What if the mugger has a knife?” He asked in a passable imitation of Bruce’s Batman Growl.
Bruce’s eyes went wide and he just barely managed to dance out of Jason’s reach at the last possible second. “Jason.”
“Batman is bringing out the Dad Voice. Something serious is about to go down people.” 
“You have to be prepared for anything, B.” And then Jason got his arms around him and Bruce’s life flashed before his eyes. 
Okay. Maybe Clark and Diana were onto something when they called Bruce a Drama Queen.
“You’re dead.” Jason growls, jamming his fingers into Bruce’s ribs and wiggling them wildly. Bruce clamps his mouth shut, focusing all of his energy on trying to escape from what is essentially a bear hug from his hulk of a son.
“J-Jay.” He grits out, breathing heavy through his nose when Jason starts pinching around the spot where his abs faded into his sides. His whole body jolting when strong fingers start prodding at taut muscles.
“Come on Big Bird, if you can’t escape this how will you defend against the real thing?” Jason taunted, pinching up and down Bruce’s muscled sides.
“No way.” Clark breathed, the sound completely drowned out by the laugh being ripped out of Bruce’s lungs.
“Sh-hihihihi-it!” The dam breaks when Jason’s fingers find the sweet spot at the bottom of Bruce’s ribs. “Not-not there!” Bruce laughs, trying to curl his body forward. Jason’s arms crisscrossed over his chest don’t let him go anywhere, so Bruce does the next best thing his tickle-rattled brain can think of. He throws all of his considerable weight backwards, knocking Jason off-balance and sending the two of them crashing to the mats.
Bruce wastes no time catching his breath, flipping around and pinning Jason to the mat. “Oh-ho.” Bruce laughs at the alarmed look in Jason’s eyes. “You’re in for it now.”
“Who is this man, and what has he done with Bruce?” Clark whispers to Diana, neither of their eyes leaving the pair struggling on the sparing mat. Bruce looks ten years younger with the blinding smile stretched across his face as he taunts Jason. He let’s one of Jason’s hands go so he can burry his fingers into Jason’s armpit, sending the younger man into a fit of laughter, which is quickly joined by Bruce’s own laughter when Jason latches onto his side and starts squeezing.
“Jay, tag me in.” Clark Kent’s bare feet come into view, and Bruce abruptly stops his attack. He slowly looks up with wide eyes to see Clark’s cocky smirk as he holds out a hand for Jason to slap.
“Since when is this a tag team match?” Bruce knows running won’t do him any good, but he can’t help but glance around for an escape plan. He grabs Jason’s hand that was trying to sneak back to his stomach, pinning it back down to the mat.
“Since Jason was kind enough to show us a new side of you.” Diana purred into his ear and Bruce just barely refrained from jumping out of his skin as she dropped to her knees and wrapped her arms around his middle. 
“This is not how tag team matches work.” Bruce protests as Jason bucks up to remind him that he’s still being pinned down. Bruce looks down at his smirking son, and his mouth quirks up into a lopsided smile against his will. “Is this why you stopped by?” He asked, amusement bleeding into his tone despite the danger he’s in.
“Alfred said you’ve been down lately.” Jason shrugged, not quite meeting Bruce’s eyes. “I told him that’s just your personality,” Clark snorted at that. “but he promised me a batch of cookies if I came. Said he’d throw in some brownies if I could get you to smile.”
“And it appears the apple did not fall far from the tree, Master Bruce.” All 4 heads swiveled to see Alfred watching from the bottom of the staircase, a fond smile on his face. Bruce scowled at his butler, not missing the hastily concealed phone that meant he probably snapped a few pictures before making his presence known. “Master Jason heard you were training and said he’d like to “take a crack at you” for old time’s sake.”
“Wait, you really used to tickle him when you were sparing?” Clark asked, disbelief clear in his voice. He wouldn’t have believed that ten minutes ago, but after seeing how comfortable Bruce was with fingers trying to burrow their way into his muscles a minute ago he was starting to reevaluate the “no touching” signals Bruce threw off.
“He was 15!” Bruce said, as though that made any difference. “I wasn’t going to punch a child!” Did they think he was some kind of monster? Sure, he could pull his punches, but he wasn’t willing to risk slipping and giving his son a black eye. 
Diana snorted. “You really are a big softy.” She cooed, squeezing him around the middle in a precursor for what was to come.
“Can we wreck him now?” Clark asked, bouncing on the balls of his feet.
“Are you asking my permission?” Jason laughed. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m the victim here.” He rotated his pinned down wrists for emphasis.
“You started this.” Bruce protested, narrowing his eyes at the smirking man beneath him.
“You started this 15 years ago. I’m just finally getting around to getting my revenge.”
“I am a grown man.” Bruce protested, as though that would change anything.
“Yes, but you have the emotional intelligence of a child.” Clark laughed again, and Jason looked pleased with himself. 
“I like him.” Diana laughed, breath tickling the shell of Bruce’s ear.
“If I may,” Alfred spoke up again, immune to the death glare Bruce was sending his way. “I seem to recall Master Bruce griping about Master Kent’s habit of squeezing his thighs whenever he gets up from a seat.” Bruce goes entirely still, cursing the warm feeling creeping into his cheeks. “I believe the phrase he used was “It makes me want to crawl out of my skin, Alfred.” “
“I am not going to forget this.” Bruce growls, glaring daggers at his friend-turned-enemy.
“Just as I haven’t forgotten a little boy shrieking in delight as he begged his father to send the tickle monster after him.”
You could cook an egg on Bruce’s face, it was so hot. Jason was cackling beneath him, Clark was clearly trying to hide his laughter behind his hand, and Diana gasped softly into his ear.
“I was four.” Bruce murmured, blush racing down his neck and settling across his chest.
“That is the cutest thing I have ever heard.” Diana’s laugh managed to not sound mocking, but Bruce still bristled at being called cute.
“I was four.” He reiterated, a quick intake of air cutting off any further protests when Diana unceremoniously latched onto his upper ribs and started tickling with abandon.  
Bruce had just enough presence of mind to not go crashing down onto Jason, instead trying to roll sideways as his arms turned to jelly and hoarse laughter was ripped from his throat. Clark wasted no time in joining in, strong fingers latching onto the muscle of Bruce’s thigh and squeezing them at random.
“Fucking he-hehehe-hell!” Bruce gasped, laughter pouring out of him unbidden as he tried to curl into a ball on his side. Diana and Clark were hovering over him, boxing him in so he couldn’t escape, but not cheating and holding him down so he at least had a chance at fighting back. Bruce kicked out at Diana when she slipped a hand under his shirt to tickle at the bare skin of his stomach. His foot connected with something and he had a second of triumph, before he squealed.
“Ooooh I think I’ve found a good spot.” Diana was holding his ankle in a steel grip while she dragged her nails across his bare sole, drawing swirling shapes into the vulnerable skin and driving Bruce wild.
“Dickhead is going to love this.” Jason laughed. Bruce cracked his eyes open, prepared for Jason to join in the fray, but shook his head when he saw his son recording the whole thing on his phone.
“Jason.” Bruce managed to get out, once Diana released his foot and let him regain some of his sanity. “Don’t you da-ha-dare!” He reached for the phone, but Jason just buried his free hand in Bruce’s armpit and sent him collapsing back to the mat with a bark of laughter.
“I think justice has been served.” Diana said, after another minute of tickling around and behind Bruce’s bare knees where his shorts had ridden up. Bruce’s face was flushed a healthy shade of pink, and his chest was heaving as he hugged himself around his stomach and shook with laughter, rolling side to side in an attempt to shake their hands off.
Jason’s phone disappeared from view, and Bruce rolled onto his stomach and pillowed his head in his arms as he caught his breath, trying to tamp down on the residual laughter still running through him. 
“You know,” Bruce looked up at Clark’s teasing tone. “You could have asked us to stop earlier.”
“I did!” Bruce protested, pushing himself into a sitting position to glare at Diana’s tittering laugh.
“You did not.”
“Let’s watch the video playback, shall we?” Jason was gloating, wagging his phone over Bruce’s head. Bruce lunged for it, snatching it away and springing to his feet. “HEY!” Jason yelped, trying to grab it back as Bruce danced out of his reach, using one hand to open up the camera app so he could delete the video
Before he could get to it a facetime call popped up, Dick’s excited face plastered across the screen. “You didn’t.” Bruce groaned, letting Jason snatch the phone back and answer the call. 
“Bruce is ticklish!?” Dick’s voice rang out, skipping right over the greetings to get to the important stuff. 
“Yes!” Jason crowed, spinning so his back was to the 3 heroes and he could get them all in frame. “Old man’s been holding out on us all these years.”
“I can’t believe this!”
“Wait. They never got you back?” Clark asked, sidling up next to Bruce, who was clearly trying to scowl at the phone but he couldn’t wipe the lopsided smile from his face.
“Nope. I kept that secret for almost 20 years.” Bruce said, shaking his head with a self depreciating laugh. 
“You know this changes everything, right?” Diana asks, slipping her arms around Bruce’s waist and resting her chin on his shoulder. 
The muscles in Bruce’s jaw twitches as he clenches his teeth in thought, leaning back against her chest. “Do....do you two want things to change?” He asks, sounding hesitant even to his own ears.
“Only if you do.” Clark says, standing in front of Bruce and blocking them from the view of Jason’s facetime call. Jason seemed to have forgotten about them anyway, caught up in his excited planning with Dick. He almost felt bad for what was to come for Bruce, but he knew he could handle it.
Bruce is quiet for a few seconds, painfully aware that both Clark and Diana could hear his heart hammering away in his chest. He licks his suddenly dry lips as he searches for something in Clark’s gaze. He must find whatever it is he’s looking for, because he nods once. “I...would like that.”
“Wow.” Jason says, appearing at Clark’s elbow. “That almost sounded like a human emotion.”
“Out.” Bruce growls. “Now.”
“Geez.” Jason mutters, hands raised in front of himself in surrender. “Touchy touchy.” He mutters, but scrambles backwards when Clark turns to stare at him.
“Do you really want to stick around and see what’s about to happen?” Clark asked, eyebrow cocked.
Bruce sputters a laugh at Jason’s disgusted expression. He hightails it for the stairs, noticing for the first time that Alfred already took the hint and made himself sparse.
“Now,” Clark turns back to Bruce and Diana, a soft smile playing around his lips. “Where were we?” 
“Right...about...here.” Diana says, dotting a soft line of kisses down the left side of Bruce’s neck. Bruce whimpered, lips squeezed shut as he tried in vein not to move. “You can move, Bruce.” Diana whispered into the skin of his neck. “That’s part of the fun.” 
Bruce gasped, jerking to the side to escape the soft lips dragging over the delicate skin. Clark seized his opportunity to box him in, his lips latching onto the right side of his neck. He slowly made his way up towards Bruce’s ear, while Diana began her slow trek down to his collarbones. Bruce let out a mix between a groan and a whimper, going boneless between them as he felt a new level of pleasure previously unknown to him. He didn’t know if he was going to make it through this night, but what a way to go.
452 notes · View notes
lovebugism · 1 year ago
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❛ i’m telling you all of a sudden, but it isn’t new to me. i love you. ❜ with our boy Steve Harrington please?
i wrote this after watching little women, so this is like that one laurie and amy scene but stranger things coded <3 hope you like it!! (this is 5k words btw and barely proofread 🫣)
The R.V. smells like coopery blood, alternate dimension muck, and nine teenagers who haven’t showered in three days. But despite all that, Steve Harrington is next to you, smiling. 
As if there’s anything worth being happy about now. 
He tells you about a dream with a hopeful gleam in his honey eyes, like he believes it’ll all come true — like death is staring him in the face. “I know it’s silly, but I… I always dreamed I’d have this really, really big family. I’m talking like, uh— a full brood of Harrington’s. I don’t know, five… Maybe six kids?”
“Six?” you repeat with an incredulous laugh. You turn your body in the passenger seat to face him more, shoulder pressing into the worn pleather. You’ve got your brows raised to your hairline in shock at his admission and a beam on your face you don’t realize is there.
“Uh-huh. Six little nuggets. Three girls, three boys,” he says with an assured nod. There’s a distant smile hinting at the edges of his lips, and he looks at you with it for a moment before turning back to the road again. 
“And every summer, I figured all of us Harrington’s, we’d pack into something like this, and… just see the country. You know, the Rockies, the Grand Canyon, maybe Yellowstone. We’d end up in some beachside town in California and spend a week parked in the sand, maybe learn how to surf or something.”
You can picture the dream so effortlessly, almost like it’s one you’ve had yourself. 
In some ways, you did.
Steve Harrington was the kind of boy that filled you with butterflies and childlike daydreams. It was more innocent than lusting, more significant than a teenage crush. There was a time you’d wanted to be with him so badly that you could barely breathe. It kept you up at night, fantasizing about a future with a boy that didn’t want you. It haunted your dreams just as often.
You were, perhaps a bit begrudgingly, a part of that stereotype — a girl who wanted all of the things adults thought girls wanted. You longed for a pretty white dress and a husband that cried when you walked down the aisle. You wanted a small house with a white picket fence, a home that’s always loud with laughing children and barking dogs and loving parents.
It was a future you only wanted with Steve.
But he didn’t love you. Not the way he loved Nancy.
Not the way he still loves Nancy.
It’s not a crime he needs to confess to for you to know he’s guilty of it. You can see it written all over his face, in the way he talks about his future family and flits his gaze from the winding backroad up to the rearview mirror to look at her. He’s picturing her in his head the way you picture him in yours.
Knowing someone else is a part of this dreamt-up family and not you is a bitter pill to swallow.
It has you looking back too, at the gang of ragtag soldiers you’re about to save the world with. You glance over your shoulder at all of them, finding them dozing or outright sleeping in the back of the R.V. 
You don’t blame them. The past few days have been hell.
You’re just glad Max has finally found a moment of peace. The redhead lazes between Lucas and Dustin on the couch in the very back. She rests her head on the former boy’s soldier, but you can’t tell if she’s sleeping or not. Lucas has his eyes closed but a smile on his face as he lays his cheek on the crown of her head.
Dustin, on the other hand, looks dreadfully out of place among the two lovebirds. His head is tilted back and his mouth is wide open. Soft snores spill from his throat.
Erica, Robin, and Nancy all sit at the tiny table beside the tinier kitchen. Their heads are either resting on their folded arms or pressing against the window.
The small cushion adjacent to the couch is taken up wholly by Eddie. 
Your Eddie.
His long legs are spread and his back is slouched against the side of the R.V. He’s taking up every bit of room the thing has to offer, which wasn’t very much to begin with. His pink lips are parted and slightly chapped. He blows soft exhales from them that make his chest rise and fall with even breaths. 
Your hands begin to ache with the want to run them through his wild strands of hair, to ease his head to your chest and let the sound of your heartbeat chase away the nightmares that threaten to plague him.
You want so badly to sleep alongside him, but you know that slumber won’t come as easily to you.
Despite the exhaustion that weighs down your tired bones, whenever you close your eyes, you can only see Chrissy’s mangled body on the ceiling of Eddie’s trailer. The image of broken bones and sucked-out eye sockets is stained on the back of your mind.
It’s something you’ll never forget. Not in a billion, trillion lifetimes.
You’re scared you won’t ever sleep peacefully again.
But you’re glad Eddie’s finally resting. Even if you can’t. 
And maybe that’s what love is.
…Love.
You almost can’t believe you’re calling it that. It’s not like you’ve told him as much or anything. You haven’t been together very long, only a few months, but you’re not sure what else to call this feeling. Is it normal for you to want to fight the most powerful dark wizard known to man with your bare hands as long as it means keeping Eddie safe?
The realization that you’re actually moving on from Steve is perhaps more shocking. You were starting to think you’d be fawning over him for the rest of your life, destined to be alone forever while he got married and had kids. But then Eddie came out of nowhere. He swept you off your feet without even trying.
You’d spent so much of your life in love with Steve that you’d forgotten how it felt to be loved. But Eddie reminded you, most ardently so, and you’ve never been happier.
And Steve can see all that.
He can see how you’ve gone to hell and back — quite literally — to keep Eddie safe. He can see how Eddie still manages to make you laugh so hard your stomach hurts, even though death looms overhead like a big, gray storm cloud. It almost makes him angry. Not at Eddie, exactly. And certainly not at you. He’s more so mad at himself for waiting until you were out of his grip entirely to need you like air.
Steve wasn’t an idiot; he knew how you felt about him. He’s known for years. But Nancy was the only girl in his purview for… an embarrassingly long amount of time. Maybe that’s because she didn’t want a single damn thing to do with him at first, and it wasn’t like Steve to back down from a challenge.
But you? You were easy. You were always going to be there. Your love was the only constant thing in his life.
And then it just… wasn’t.
It was like his center of gravity had suddenly shifted or his feet had been knocked out from under him. The loss of you, of something that was never his to begin with, jarred him like he’d been awake with most vigor. Now, he finds himself living in a nightmare — forced to watch you fall in love with someone else while he ebbs slowly from your mind.
You sit with him now — with Eddie — while he and Dustin fuck around with the shields they’d crafted out of tin garbage can lids. You watch them with a smile on your face even though you’re shaking your head at them and telling them something that Steve can’t hear. 
You’ve got a sword in your hand, and you sharpen its steel with a rock. The too expensive thing had been hanging on the wall at The War Zone, and you told Eddie you just had to have it. 
“I’ll just… take up extra shifts at Wayne’s shop,” you reason with a shrug, gaze never leaving the bladed weapon.
“Do whatever you want,” the brunette boy responded nonchalantly as he dropped four cases of ammunition into the red basket in your hand. He smiled down at you. “That just means I’ll get to see you more.”
It hurts Steve for you to be so far away from him. 
You’re just across the small clearing. All he’d have to do is walk over to you, really, but it’s more than just the distance. No matter how close he gets to you, or how far you get from Eddie, your soul’s always going to be with him. 
Steve will never have you like that, and that’s what hurts the most.
He thinks he’s doing a pretty good job of keeping a stiff upper lip about it. He thinks he’s keeping some deep, dark secret, having no idea that he’s all but spilling his guts to Robin. Honestly, he’s just trying to make conversations while they make homemade bombs out of gasoline and glass bottles, but he’s more than obvious. As per usual.
“How long do you think they’ve got?” Steve asks her out of the blue while he pours the chemicals through the funnel and into the flask Robin holds out for him. He doesn’t wait for an answer. 
“Because I thought they’d be over forever ago, you know? I mean… it’s Eddie. She’s, like, totally out of his league, right? But I’m pretty sure they just had an anniversary or something because I saw him buying flowers at Bradley’s Big Buy the other day…”
Robin opens her mouth to get a word in, but Steve just keeps on going going going.
“Unless you think they were for someone else? But let’s be serious, right? He’s a freak, but he’d never do that to her. I don’t know… Maybe he’s just the sorta guy that gets her flower for no reason, and it hasn’t been as long as it feels.”
“Well, I’m pretty sure they—”
“Let’s face it, if he’s doing that for her, they’re probably gonna make it, right?” the boy laughs bitterly to himself. He stuffs a rag into the neck of the bottle. “God, I’m such an idiot… Maybe if I’d done those things, I’d still—”
“I swear to god, if you say you’d still be with Nancy, I’m gonna punch you in the forehead,” Robin snapped suddenly. She’s got a foreign sternness to her tone and a glacial hardness in her blue eyes. She glares at him with it. “You don’t love Nancy, Steve. And she doesn’t love you. So stop going for the easiest thing when you know it’s not what you want.”
He sighs. He knows she’s right. “I just—”
“I get it. It sucks being lonely. I’m pretty sure I’m destined to spend the rest of my life alone, so join the club,” Robin smiles, a tad bit cynically, at him. “It sucks being in love with someone you can’t have. Trust me, I get it. But you need to move on.”
Steve swallows. He almost winces at the thought of that — of never having you. He shakes his head as though to get rid of the idea entirely. “I can’t… I can’t do that, Rob.”
“Then what are you gonna do, Steve?” she asks him with a mirthless, but not unkind laugh. 
She nods her head over to you. You laugh as Eddie spins you in his arms, both of you marveling at how you’ve just nailed a tree on the far edge of the clearing with the knives you’d thrown at it. Steve can hear the sound of your bubbly laughter from where he sits. Its brightness rivals that of the setting sun. 
“Look at her. She’s happy. Finally. So… Just let her be happy,” Robin advises with a shrug. She sets the glass bottle in the box with the rest of them. “I mean, we’re about to stop a dark wizard from ending the world, you know? Some of us probably won’t make it out—”
“Don’t say that,” Steve scolds.
“Some of us probably won’t make it,” she repeats, firmer this time, like it’s something he really needs to hear. “Something could happen to Eddie. Something could happen to her. Do you really want to be the selfish asshole that ruins what could very well be everyone’s last moments together just because you’ve got a bleeding heart?”
She’s being harsh. He knows it deserves it. Now is virtually the worst time to tell you everything on his mind — just when you’re starting to really settle down with Eddie and about to fight some wizard in an alternate dimension.
Something could happen to her. Those words left Robin’s mouth and stabbed him in the heart like a thousand unforgiving knives. Steve can’t fathom anything ever happening to you. Even with the end of the world, with all of you about to fight a war, it never crossed his mind. He can’t picture his life without you in it.
He can’t lose you without telling you how he feels — that he loves you, that he’s always loved you, and that he’s an oblivious idiot who learned that too late.
He can’t lose you at all.
So, against his better judgment and Robin’s sound advice, Steve abandons his work with her and hikes the relatively short distance over to you.
Eddie hasn’t yet let go of you. He keeps his arms tight around your waist and hugs you from behind, pressing the back of you to his chest while his chin sits along your shoulder. His chocolate eyes are stuck on the bullseye you’d carved into the bark of the tree on the far side of the clearing. The four knives you’d thrown, now stuck at the very center of the target, stare back at him.
“This is probably a bad time to be turned on, huh?” he half-jokes, chin bobbing against your shoulder with every word.
“Eddie!” you scold as you wrench yourself out of his grip.
Dustin’s face screws up from where he lounges on the grass beside the both of you. “Gross…” 
You walk away from the two boys to collect your knives from the poor oak tree. Eddie whistles lowly at you while you go — as though he’s never seen you in a pair of jeans before. You throw your middle finger over your shoulder at him in response.
That’s when Steve catches you, when you’re finally alone, and with a tiny white lie of needing to go back to the R.V. for more gasoline. You offer to walk with him, just like he figured you might, because none of you wants anyone to go off alone. Not with Vecna potentially watching you.
You walk alongside him through the thick wood, dodging low-hanging branches and uplifted roots. Steve notices the distant smile dancing on the corners of your lips — a beautiful stain Eddie’s left there.
“What are you gonna do?” he asks you suddenly. “You know, when this is all over?”
Your brows raise at his question, mouth falling softly agape and eyes widening with a far-off look. You look stumped by the simple inquiry, like it’s something you hadn’t thought of yet — of any of this being over.
“I don’t know…” you murmur. “Go back to work, I guess.”
Steve laughs. “We’re gonna save the world tonight, and you’re gonna be back in the office on Monday?”
“Who knows? Maybe I’ll take a sick day,” you joke, just to hear him laugh again.
He lifts a splintered tree limb to get it out of the way for you, then ushers you to walk ahead of him. You mutter a low and shy “thank you” as you walk beneath it. He lets the branch fall again as he follows behind you.
“What about you, then?” you retort. “What are you gonna do after? Since going back to a nine-to-five is so unreasonable.”
“Actually, I was thinking about writing an opera,” Steve quips with a straight face. “I would be the main character, of course—”
“You’re such an idiot,” you giggle with the shake of your head. The airy, sunshine sound makes him smile down at you. His honey-tined gaze swims with longing. You don’t catch it because you’re not looking back at him.
“What do you want me to do, then?”
You tilt your head to catch his stare. Your eyes sparkle and your brows arch with a look both soft and stern. “Honest answer?”
“Of course.”
“I think you should go work for your dad. Try and… I don’t know… make something for yourself—”
“Alright, that’s not…”
“—Because you can’t work at Family Video forever, Steve!”
“You’re not playing fair,” he concedes quietly, laughing under his breath and shaking his head.
He shouldn’t have expected anything less — you did preface an honest answer, after all. It doesn’t make him feel any less bad about it, though.
You’d supported Steve through a lot of shit. Every mindless fight with his parents, every breakup that had him swearing he would never love again, every aspect of his douchebag phase that almost ruined your friendship. You were always soft with him, but never dishonest.
So when he told you that his dad offered him a well-paying job in Indianapolis, it didn’t surprise him when you told him to take it. Despite all the other shit (his broken relationship with his father and his incessant daydreaming of settling down with Nancy, namely), you knew he wasn’t happy in Hawkins.
“Fuck your dad, Steve. This isn’t about him,” you’d said. “You should take it! Starting building your life in the city! And when you’re finally making more money than your stupid dad, you can rub it in everyone’s stupid faces.”
Steve, of course, ended up turning it down.
The salary was high — too high for a boy just out of high school — but he figured no amount of money was worth a wounded pride. 
Steve was scared that it was all a ploy, another thing his dad could hold over his head, another accomplishment that wasn’t really his. And, truth be told, he was less enthusiastic about leaving Hawkins without you. He isn’t quite sure where he’d be in life without you guiding him through a significant portion of it. It made it nearly impossible to picture a life that didn’t have you at the very center of it.
He happily took to be Robin Buckley’s schmuck at Scoops Ahoy (and then again at Family Video) and Dustin Henderson’s unofficial chauffeur instead. He didn’t mind being a casualty of rattrap small town as long as it meant he didn’t have to stray too far from you.
But here you were now, right next to him in this lonesome forest, and still so far away.
You meet his boyishly forlorn expression with a sincere, tight-lipped smile. “You know that I’m right.”
“Yeah, I do,” he scoffs in response. “That’s the problem.”
“When we kill Vecna and save Hawkins for the… thousandth time… You should take that job. I mean, screw your dad, you deserve a life outside of all this shit—”
“So do you,” he argues.
“I’ll make it without you, Harrington. I’ll try to, anyway,” you quip, turning your gaze up to the family of birds sitting high in an oak tree and wishing you were one of them. You shrug to yourself. “I’ll keep on being a secretary at the car shop… Maybe settle down with Eddie.”
That makes Steve stop dead in his tracks. He laughs bitterly to himself, a quiet and venom-coated scoff. “Right. Because living with his uncle in a one-bedroom trailer is such a dream.”
It makes you stop, too, and turn on your heel to face him. You’re surprised to find him so many paces back. Steve sees a flash of hurt strike like lightning across your features, but he’s too hurt to apologize.
“I get it,” you concede with a small, cynical smile. “You don’t like him. You never have. But… He’s a good guy, Steve. If you just got to know him—”
“It’s not that,” he mumbles, cutting you off before he has to suffer through a list of reasons why Eddie’s so much better than he is. The boy’s gaze falls to the forest floor. He kicks a bunch of green pine needles with the toe of his sneaker rather than meet your prying gaze.
“Then what is it?” you retort. “Because I was just trying to help you. I didn’t say to, like, hurt your feelings or whatever. I just know that you want a life in the city, with a big house and a whole bunch of kids—” A laugh spills from your lips as you remember the dream he was telling you about. “You want that picture-perfect life, right? Now you can have it!”
“You don’t know what I want,” he counters quietly.
“Oh, please. I know you better than you know yourself, Steve Harrington—”
“Break up with him,” he blurts.
Your playful smile fades almost instantly. Your eyes search his face for any hint that he might be joking, but all you find is a deeply heartbroken boy. His bushy brows are scrunched together, his eyes glimmering with unshed tears, a puppy-like hurt painting each of his features.
You match his expression of grief with your own. Your face scrunches with a mixture of confusion and sorrow. “Wh… What?” you manage to stutter after realizing you’d been holding your breath.
“I don’t want you to settle down with Eddie,” Steve confesses. A secret he thought he’d take to his grave before ever telling you.
You’re quiet. For several long moments, you’re eerily silent. Even the forest hangs on bated breath. Birds stop chirping, the wind stops blowing, leaves stop rustling. It’s just you and him and a great big world waiting on the both of you.
A frown pulls down the very corners of your mouth. Your eyes go glassy and wide, like a heartbroken baby, and your head jerks back softly, still defensive and unsure.
“Why?” you force through a tightening throat.
“Why?” Steve repeats, finding it somehow within himself to laugh. He takes several short strides to stand with you again. With him closer now, you can see the sadness in his smile and the flush that blotches his cheeks. “You know why…”
You only shake your head in response. The words are far harder to get out. “No…”
“I just… I know it feels like I’m saying it all of a sudden, but it’s… It’s not new to me, you know?” Steve tries his best to explain to you why he’s choosing now, of all moments, to pour his heart out to you. His eyes are as wide and hopeful as the palms he waves out in front of him. “I don’t wanna go into this without you knowing how I feel about you—” 
“Steve,” you agonize in hopes of ending his rambling. “Don’t.”
“—And I just want you to know, in case something happens, that I love you.”
“No,” you say with the defiant shake of your head, your chin quivering and your gaze ice-cold.
“Yes,” he replies, just as stubborn.
“Steve…” you choke out when the name gets hung in your throat. 
A warm tear falls from your lashes and onto the very apple of your cheek. You wipe it away with the back of your hand and use your free one to bat Steve away when he tries to reach out for you. You stumble back from him, heading back the way you came — back to Eddie.
“Don’t, Steve. Just stop it.”
“Why?” he grieves in the softest voice he can muster, wet and warm with his hurt.
“You’re being mean,” you scold.
“I’m being mean?” he echoes with a sad sort of laugh.
“When it comes to you… I have always been second to Nancy. Always. And I won’t be the person you settle for just because she doesn’t want you, Steve,” you rant, voice fragile like glass or flower petals. 
He wants to tell you that he doesn’t want Nancy — that being with the person he loves won’t be settling — but you continue in your lament, and he misses the chance.
“I can’t… I won’t do it, okay? Not after I’ve spent my entire life loving you,” you confess to him, face scrunched in anger. It’s a subtle sort of rage, pointed both at him and yourself.
He watches, feeling totally helpless, while you wipe bitterly at your damp cheeks. Steve’s seen a lot of assholes make you cry. He never dreamed he’d be one of them. 
Robin was right. He’d ruined everything. It seems to be the only thing he’s good at these days.
“I’m sorry,” he calls to you as you walk away. “I wasn’t… I didn’t say it to make you sad.”
“You shouldn’t have said it at all!” you shout back, angrier than you’ve ever been with him. You take in a stuttering breath and exhale a shakier sigh, trying to calm yourself down again. “I just don’t get why you waited so long…” you agonize, words wet with tears. “Why did you wait until I was happy? Eddie… Eddie’s so nice to me, Steve. And you just… You just throw this shit at me right before we... That’s not fair.”
“I know…” he murmurs. “I know…”
The world starts turning again. 
Birds sing their songs, sounding somehow sadder than before, as though in lament for the brokenhearted boy. The wind begins to whistle as it brushes through the trees. It’s only half successful in breathing air back into your lungs.
A rustling of the brush gains both of your attention’s. It sounds like something is slithering somewhere in the thick laurel — a rabbit, a snake, a dark wizard out to kill a bunch of sad teenagers. 
You and Steve are alone, heartbroken, and clear targets for a monster who feeds on traumatized kids.
Though it’s entirely unlikely that Vecna has crawled out from the depths of the Upside Down and into these woods, you and Steve reach for your respective weapons anyway — him for the axe strapped to his back and you for the knives hanging on your belt. You’re ready to protect each other despite your distant anger.
But instead of some shriveled skin creep, you find freaks of a different kind.
The pale human faces of Dustin and Eddie peek out from the brush with curious smiles. They maneuver through the thicket and try to avoid the thorns. “What’s going on over here, huh?” the oldest boy wonders with his signature sparkling grin.
It’s almost scary how you so easily contort your features full of grief into a sickly sweet, artificial smile. You swipe the back of your hand over your face again to clear the tears clinging to your lashes, though it looks like you’re only wiping away sweat.
“Nothing,” you answer quickly with the innocent shake of your head. “Steve was just being an idiot—”
“Imagine that,” Dustin scoffs.
“—And saying stuff he doesn’t mean.”
“That’s not true,” Steve mutters, then clears his throat when the words come out more choked than expected.
“Just wanted to make sure you weren’t out here making moves on my girl, Harrington,” Eddie lilts with a playful smile. He reaches you and wraps a heavy arm over your shoulder to tuck you into his side. 
His sudden touches stopped surprising you a long time ago. You realized early on in your relationship that he can’t go without touching you for very long.
Eddie squints teasingly at Steve. “Go get your own.”
The boy doesn’t have a comeback at the ready. He isn’t sure of what to say, anyway. Eddie’s jokes aren’t as funny when they aren’t jokesanymore. He was just sort of professing his love to you and getting his heart stomped on in the process. He should probably be used to the feeling by now, but it stings like it’s brand new.
You’re grateful for Eddie’s appearance and the bickering that seems to follow him wherever he goes. It’s easy to get lost in his words, let all the sarcasm run over you, and forget the bullshit that came before it.
“We should head back before the others think we got abducted by Vecna or something,” you urge, desperate to get away from these woods and from this moment.
Dustin listens to you without question because he always listens to you. And Steve listens because he wants an escape just as much as you do. He’d rather go back to Robin and all her “I told you so”’s than keep watching Eddie hold you like he is now.
“What do ya say we skip this joint and have our own fun out here?” the wild-haired boy jokes, already leaning down to press a kiss to your mouth.
“Eddie, don’t—” you huff, but otherwise don’t fight him. It’s only an innocent peck, a loud smack upon your lips, that makes Dustin mutter “gross…” under his breath as he walks away. 
And if he heard it, that means Steve heard it.
You keep your eyes open all the while. You feel a bit numb, actually. A little like you’ve just kissed a ghost. You feel as cold as one, as distant and not all there. Eddie holds your hand the entire walk back to the clearing, but you have a hard time feeling it.
You feel a bit like woods surrounding you. You’re all crowded and heavy with sadness. You can’t tell if your grief is your own or if you’re feeling Steve’s too, because you can’t seem to take your eyes off him.
There’s an entire forest within you, you find, and Steve’s carved his initials into every tree.
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am-i-the-asshole-official · 9 months ago
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WIBTA if I were to report my ex friend's antisemitism to their university?
So I 20nb have been friends with most my current friend group since we were 11. Two years ago I stopped being friends with a guy in my friend group due to toxic behavior on his part (not antisemitic yet, just giving background info) He would constantly say things like "don't make fun of neurodivergent people's special interests and hyperfixations as they can't help it" and then would go and make fun of my special interests (note: said ex friend has ADHD). Over our friendship he had a lot of double standards like that and one day I had enough. The first time I brought it up he dismissed it as someone else in the friend group did the behaviors I'm accusing him of. I kinda dropped it as I didn't want to deal with that level of denial and thought that if I waited a few days he would have had some time to reflect. So I brought it up again and he continued to blame it being one of our other friends doing it and that I was simply "misremembering". I gave specific examples and rough time frames yet he continued to deny it. All I wanted was a simple "I'm sorry and I will work on that" yet he refused to do that. So I ended our friendship.
Since then we have been on rocky terms. We are still in the same friend group since the issue was between me and him, I didn't want to involve my friends and make people pick sides. He was moving away soon at the time of the end of our friendship so it wasn't like I was going to see him when the friend group all hung our together.
Since we are still in the same friend group, he is in the discord server our friend group has which is just like a massive group chat with things categorized into topics.
Recently there is the current conflict going on in Israel and Palenstine. I am Jewish and vented to the vent section of that discord server about how I have seen people I know irl post online antisemitic things. I am very much against Israels actions and made sure to include that in my vent so no one coukd twist my words. I didn't initially say exactly what I was seeing as I was still processing the fact that I was going to have to cut some people off.
He then replied to my vent saying that he has never seen anything antisemitic online and that if he has, he has seen Jewish people saying that it isnt. I replied that his reply to my vent was weird and that i was talking about people saying that all jews should die. I felt hurt as yet again he was being hypocritical towards me as he has said before that you should say that (what he said) when people complain about seeing hateful things towards a group (eg racism, homophobia, etc).
He then responded that I was only calling him antisemitic because he was arab. The thing is, I never called him antisemitic and I myself am also arab. (Yes I know, most people have never met an arab jew but we do exist).
I pointed out that I never called him antisemitic and I am also arab which he seems to have forgotten. I said that his response was still weird considering what he has said in the past about people who say what he said. I then invited him to dm me privately to discuss things further if he wants to as it's not fair to do this in front of all of our friends.
He did not respond and ended up blocking me on discord.
This irked me quite a bit but in the end I decided that him blocking me was for the better if he stands by his original response. I was talking to my partner about it who is not Jewish and he said that my ex friend's response was definitely weird and the fact that he was so quick to defend himself about being called an antisemite without even being called it was indicative that he probably is. I decided to look at my ex friends tumblr to see if there was anything to suggest that and there was. I saw a few posts which he has recently reblogged which used anti Semitic dog whistles like the echo, example: (((insert text you which doesnt say jew but you are implying jewish people are))).
I was quite appalled to see that and am debating if I should send it to his university. The university he attends has spoken out about antisemitism before and has kicked out people in the past for using racist dog whistles due to a potential danger to POC students so it is likely that he would get kicked out for using antisemitic dog whistles.
In my mind, he fucked around and therefore should find out aka face natural consequences for his actions.
WIBTA if I contacted his University about his antisemitism?
What are these acronyms?
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