#it's basically a thesis

[rekishi-aka]

Between a rock and a hard place: Adam had no choice, because Leo didn't leave him any

Probably not exactly a hot take, and actually a copy from my DW post the other day. Also, the original post has pictures, but because tumblr doesn't support any proper HTML, I had to skip the majority of them. Which is annoying me.

I think the whole mess is not Adam's fault alone, I actually think Leo has a significant part in it as well. I can't actually blame him, because he's so obviously in love and thought he was so close to getting what he wanted that he probably steamrolled Adam a bit. But Leo, for all that I get him and love him, is very much not blameless here.

Adam has one major raison d'être: Protect Leo. This is his one "this, you protect" thing ever. That was true in the school yard and this is also now true in adulthood with the whole money disaster. Adam wants to keep Leo out of the business with Boris and the money, because this is the best way to protect Leo. That's not exactly a news, this has been true since "Das fleißige Lieschen".

When Leo says, "I sleep better when I know nothing will happen to you", then Adam could have simply said that the same was true for him. He didn't, because Adam represses with the best of them (as you do).

(Rest under the cut, warning it's long an convoluted)

Anyway, between DfL and HdW, Leo didn't really have opportunity to catch some air. There was always something, first Adam comes back out of the blue with exactly no warning that he's still alive or about to become Leo's new partner (which he must have known), then he learns Adam's father has woken up again and the whole angst spiral starts over again. My guess is also that Adam wasn't exactly a happy guy in those two months between the episodes, because he was keeping secrets and had to deal with the emotional fallout of Roland being awake again.

I'm mostly willing to cut Adam slack about that, because he is protective of Leo and had the misguided notion of wanting to fix it himself, but Leo must have been confused. First Adam comes back and downright smoulders at him…and then he probably ran cold, suddenly. Leo is willing to forgive that for the most part because he has Adam back and looking that gift horse in the mouth will probably end with tears. So he doesn't. He should but he doesn't.

After HdW, however, that secret is very well out of the way and they obviously have some time to get used to each other again. The team gels better - probably because with Adam there, who will always have his back, Leo finally has some time to think about what he wants and how he wants to do it and Pia is willing to give the whole thing a go, so Esther is as well. They're so happy and relaxed at the beginning of HdS, flirting like they're about to go home with each other (they might have, had things not happened), it's a joy to see! It's a very bitter moment of what was and what could have been.

After HdS, Adam has more secrets, but all of Leo's secrets and guilt and tragedy has been aired out and gotten out of the way. Yes, he did put Roland in a coma, but he also did that to protect Adam. Really tragic is, I always thought that they could have just said what happened…but after KdE we also know that no one would have believed them. Leo should probably have paid more attention at uni when that topic was on the table, but he probably never thought that was about him - because that's the kind of guy Leo is.

But Leo has no more secrets. And he doesn't want any more secrets. Since DfL, he's always been in some kind of bind and all of that is just gone. And Leo can finally allow himself to actually love Adam the way he wants to.

And I think Leo just said fuck it and doesn't stop to think what that does to Adam. I don't think there was an actual love confession that used the words "I love you" or a variation thereof, but I that whole "I would go to the end of the world with you" wasn't new to Adam. Leo has said that before, in that way or in similar guise and sure, and he's very clearly loved on Adam. Maybe a bit awkwardly, because I don't think Leo is the super expert in relationships either, but I don't think he's been hiding his feelings anymore. He's way too expressive in KdE, he opens the door for Adam way too often, he wants he wants he wants.

Adam, on the other hand, doesn't do emotions - not in the Robert Karow school of thought though; Adam is very aware that they exist and that he has them but he hates it. At best he's rusty at them, at worst he's scared of feeling more than shallowly - scratching a sexual itch isn't the same as feeling something for anyone - because it makes him vulnerable. I don't believe Adam has any kind of relationship experience despite picking up strays and his experience with being loved by anyone (except Leo) is to be hurt. So he panics. And shuts down.

And Leo, who knows enough about Boris and the money and Roland to draw conclusions but not enough to see the whole picture, thinks if he just shows it enough, if he just keeps going and shows Adam how much he loves him, Adam will see it and accept it. Steter Tropfen höhlt den Stein. But he gets restless the more Adam fudges and lies and won't open his mouth, because Leo thinks if he can just fix this problem, he can fix Adam and then they will be happy. Unfortunately, that's not how life works and the whole things leads to the mess at the hospital. Because Leo goes after him again and again and is being shut down until finally, he leaves.

Adam, who knows everything and also knows that Leo loves him, finally has the opportunity to protect Leo from himself and from Adam's whole mess. Because the cut-off finger's of his attacker scared him shitless. So did the realization that, apparently, he's the heir to a crime family, but the fingers really showed him how this ripples out. He knows he's too deep into this mess, and finally when Leo steps up to him and says, "I would go to the end of the world with you but not this way", he knows the way to make Leo go away for good and protect him is to walk that path alone (single-plank bridge, anyone?). Because better Leo emotionally hurt than Leo dead for his association with Adam. Because Adam is a self-sacrificing idiot, but he also wants to save Leo from his own choices; he inserted himself way too deeply into the shitshow that is Adam's life (the couch crashing, going to see Boris, trying to get it out of Adam, etc). He doesn't want to, it hurts him a lot, but he needs to get Leo off this track. He knows Leo well and he very deliberately pushes him over the edge; he sticks in the knife and twists it, basically.

Look at it (static pics at the DW post):

And with Leo also physically shoving him (big, big no go with Adam, srsly Leo have you learned nothing), he finally has the momentum to shoot back.

He isn't enjoying hurting Leo, but he finally manages, because this is Leo after Adam leaves:

(It's lucky Vladimir is a good actor, they both are, or this could have ended up being ridiculous)

This is Adam's last ditch effort. After he pushes Leo so far away that he can't even be sure they'll even still be able to work together, he makes a last ditch effort to get rid of the money by threatening Manuela with 'finding' it at the Heimatschänke. But that goes sideways and Adam learns too much about a past he never wanted and…well.

And still Leo isn't really done with him, because we have this image from the last scene:

This is not a man who is done with his friend. And well, neither is Adam, really (because all things being equal, he will forgive Leo most things which...is a whole different can of warm I don't want to go into here).

Leo, meanwhile, knew Adam had the money. He also knew it was in the gym bag, because he tries to get into Adam's locked desk for confirmation. If Leo had gotten that then or at any other point, this would have been salvageable. But the confirmation after the fight with Alina was just too much for him to take.

And the thing is, this was more or less inevitable. Both of them assume too much about the other and talk too little about their own shit. carmenta and I discussed back in summer or early fall already that the only way they could make it work was if they learned to talk. However, that was unlikely enough that the only way it might work was if they got together, crashed and burned the relationship, and then there was some sort of tearful kissing in the rain in the middle of the night. (With a boom box preferably, but I'm old fashioned.)

I'm actually more surprised that they managed to do that before they even have a relationship, that has to be some sort of record. But ideally they'll get this out of the way and then can start again. Dramaturgically, this is really well done, I approve even if it hurts me in my feels.

Bottom line: Adam (thought he) had no choice, because Leo didn't leave him any. This doesn't make anyone the villain in this scenario, but it also doesn't mean anyone is blameless here.

Also, they both need a hug.

[meraki-yao]

listening to this RWRB video essay podcast and this:

"And once they dance, this is the happiest that we see Alex in the entire movie. And I would say his smile here is the biggest, broadest smile we see from any character in the whole movie. Because, I would say this is where Alex is getting exactly what he wanted all along, which is for Henry to let him inside."

Me: WATCH ME FUCKING SOB

(^^^the smile in question)

[stickybowl]

Lando: Oh my god. It’s uh… Carlos Sainz. It’s Carlos Sainz.

Crofty: Is it Carlos Sainz? Well it certainly is. […] Do you have to wave at him every time you see him?

Oscar: Yes, they do. They do.

Crofty: Do you feel like the man that split up the best bromance we’ve ever seen in formula one?

Oscar: No ‘cuz there’s someone has been up before me. So, I don’t feel guilty about it.

Crofty: Yeah… but he could’ve come back. He could’ve come back.

[nicollekidman]

Abby have you given a #take on 6x19 Buffy/Spike? my only knowledge of spuffy really is a huge tumblr controversy back in the day about this ep.

this is one of the most controversial episodes of all time and for good reason sdkfjgh in the simplest, least nuanced, most "done with it" terms......i think it is more than likely that particular plot point was contrived out of a place of malice for both spike/james and sarah, but i don't have an issue with it occurring within context, and don't think it's as out of character as people often say it is. i think it goes on too long (should've stopped when she crashes against the tub), is set at a weird point in the episode, is INSANE to combine with the other horrible event in this episode, and is handled badly by every other supporting character, but i'm not upset that it exists.

the steps leading up to this point have been well established, and the breaking point fits into my view of spike as essentially a wholly unique creature, a man constantly grappling with the instincts of a wild animal, who has built his entire moral code and guidelines for acceptable behavior around a woman who has conditioned him to ignore anything she says verbally and to accept her disdain/hatred as continued interest. it was never going to be analogous to real life because that is not the world they're inhabiting, and i think the way HE deals with being shaken out of the moment says more about his character than the attempted incident itself, so i don't love the idea that it's "out of character" even though obviously i get it (with the HEAVY caveat that i personally do not think that spike was aware of what he was doing as such, and that the Realization of reality is what sparks everything else).

i take voracious issue with how xander handles it (it's fuck xander lives 24/7 in this house) and what it continues to say about buffy (and women's) desire/sex, but i think i have made it make sense to me, both as a culmination of buffy's treatment of spike (and herself) in season six, and a necessary motivation for spike leading into season seven. so like. within the text, i have very few issues with it. as something created and deployed by joss whedon? one of the many reasons why he should kill himself.

[gemsalive]

okay i have no idea where on the scale of Hot Take to Restating The Obvious this falls, but i remain entirely convinced that bonnie has never actually hated puns.

of course it’s a fun trait to play up for comedic effect sometimes, but the moment i saw them let out that unguarded little laugh at siffrin’s goof at the third floor door before catching themself and remembering to correct back into The Rage (TM) the possibility that said rage could be genuine pretty much instantly wiped itself from my mind. like ohh okay that is a preteen doing the classic preteen thing of overperforming an opposite reaction to hide how much they truly care, got it 👍

[gaywarcriminals]

The thing about Shen Jiu is that deciding you’re ontologically evil is much easier than putting in the work to improve 

[wisteriagoesvroom]

alter ego

🔵🟠 a maxoscar fic 🍾 in which they spin the bottle (right round, right round) 🖋️ 5.5k words 🔗 read on ao3

preview:

“It’s just a kiss, mate. Not a marriage proposal.” Max deadpans. Oscar is the one who steps closer. “Hm.” “It might be good practice for you.” “Oh, so I give off the impression that I need practice, do I?” Max’s eyebrows shoot up. “You ask many questions.” “I like definitive answers.” “But somehow your statements are always a bit of both. You’re still uncertain.” Oscar crosses his arms in defiance, and mirrors Max, then. They’re so close that their shoes practically touch, so close Oscar can make out the off white of the other man’s shoelaces when he glances down and up again into Max’s curious expression. If Max liked flirtation, then two could play this game. Oscar acts like he isn’t interested in the game, but really, he’s just lacked the opportunity to practise.

(i fought tooth and nail with my brain for this one but y'know, here it is.)

thank you @maaxverstappen and @alphatinies for the readthrough <3

tags for ppl who might be interested - @landoom @nyoomfruits @kingkestrel @calebwidgast @scuderiabs

[moistvonlipwig]

- Clare Harner, "Immortality"

[communistkenobi]

I don’t like when people ask how many books you plan to read/have read this year one because I think that’s a weird relationship to have to books and two because I think even reading a chapter or a portion of something is valuable. this is especially true with non-fiction but even with fiction I think any amount you read, even if you don’t read the entire thing, is not a failure or ‘incomplete’

[iridescentmirrorsgenshin]

the fulfilled motifs in alhaitham and kaveh's relationship are on my brain!!

- most poignantly, the two coming together to unveil the temple of silence in cyno’s story quest, which parallels their thesis on ancient architecture and runes of king deshret’s era, as the two appropriate the other’s respective signature (alhaitham recognises architectural structures whereas kaveh is struck by the beauty of an emblem) - where the two once fell out due to the disharmony of their viewpoints, they have reconciled them within this quest

- there’s the two working together in the house of daena, where they argued in the house of daena upon meeting them in the archon quest, where they were described to have a ‘terrible’ relationship by the npc geoff, which is mirrored in cyno’s story quest by the two actively working together - as well as paralleling the npc archon quest scene the player has to actively seek out in which the two argue once more, whereas in cyno’s story quest, the two willingly exchange information and are supportive in helping the other

- we have the fulfilment of kaveh losing his family and therefore his idea of ‘home’ through him actively referring to the house he and alhaitham share as ‘home’, and that he wants to return to it together with alhaitham, as a set, and by implication a family, in cyno’s story quest

- by extension, kaveh not concealing his living arrangements by openly referring to him and alhaitham’s ‘home’ in front of his friends, which refers back to when kaveh asks the traveller to keep it a secret upon meeting him officially in alhaitham’s story quest

- kaveh buying wine and coffee beans in the tavern, alhaitham and kaveh sharing wine in their house, which is something they are mentioned to do in the bulletin boards of sumeru as well as in alhaitham's story quest, going hand in hand with the two drinking coffee together in the house of daena, with kaveh mentioning he wishes he had made some for them before leaving the house, which refers back to his 2023 birthday letter where he and alhaitham taste tested coffee beans (i am, once again asking, for an alhaitham mention in 2024....),

for future sumeru quests or events i am thinking of the unfulfilled instances or things that can be addressed??

- whether kaveh accepts alhaitham's research into sachin's influence over his father as closure for his involvement in his father disappearing into the desert, as his reaction differs from whether alhaitham tells him vs when the traveller tells him. since cyno's story quest 2 indicates that alhaitham telling him is what happened in canon, this subsequently betters their relationship. the idea of kaveh's cycle of self-detriment due to his past guilt hasn't been addressed since apop and it remains uncertain as to if kaveh has made steps to forgive himself or if he even wants to. this development of kaveh's character is truly interesting and i would love to see it explored at some point, and also in turn what alhaitham's involvement is in this, as in his newly accepted support of kaveh

- kaveh writing to/visiting his mother in fontaine? or at least a mention of kaveh's mother, as his hangout has a heavy focus on faranak's past relationship with kaveh and her hopes for his future, which we see in her advice to him as a struggling artist being that to found reliable companions. if kaveh undergoes a reconciliation arc within himself, as in he aims to forgive himself for his past guilt, then it would make sense for him to have a reconnection with his mother to talk about the past in order to truly look to the future

- kaveh and alhaitham having a role to play in the exploration of the temple of silence in future events - hints of this may be seen in sethos cautioning cyno that he may only invite people he and lord kusanali deem worthy, for cyno to then tell alhaitham and kaveh upon arriving back in sumeru. To this, kaveh expresses an open interest and cyno tells him that he will have an opportunity to investigate in the future. As alhaitham and kaveh have teamed up together in order to investigate into the temple of silence, and are indirectly connected to it through their thesis of king deshret, it seems they will likely be a part of the role the temple of silence will play in the future

(- i thought that an unfulfilled instance could be kaveh referring to alhaitham as his friend in game as this would be a callback to when paimon asked whether he and alhaitham were friends, to which he replied that they ‘used to be’ but weren’t anymore… but in terms of how alhaitham and kaveh's relationship is handled in-game, i think queercoding plays a big part in having labels such as ‘friends’ continue to be evaded (i have spoken about definitive labels being avoided in the writing of haikaveh here), this is backed up by sethos’ voice line as the two are paired together as “alhaitham and kaveh” and are referenced as a set with “those two”, rather than a definitive label such as ‘roommates’ or ‘friends’ being placed on them. Rather, they are conceived to be something outside of this, as sethos conveys their ‘otherness’ with “something about those two hanging out, you just can’t look away”, so i think, imo, it would fall more in line for them to continually not be assigned definitive relationship status, but if the improvement of their relationship is actually mentioned in-game since it was only shown and not told in cyno's story quest 2, it would make sense for them to say something that indicates they overcame misunderstandings or something vague like that. as there's an air of secrecy around alhaitham and kaveh's relationship, the traveller won't ever be privy to the specific details)

[hypnospilot]

So there's this tiktok post from a Christian who is genuinely asking what atheist funerals are like since all the comfort and discussion cannot center on the afterlife. Like, there is no concept of where the person is now, or seeing the person in the future like at theist funerals.

And this response just describes it so perfectly that I am stunned and wondered and compelled to share with everyone I know and everyone I don't.

[loving-jack-kelly]

i'm a jatherine truther in that i don't think they would have a super healthy long term relationship but them falling for each other was real and important and had a lasting impact on both of them both in their relationship with each other and their relationships with themselves and their understanding of life. like. i personally think long-term they'd end up not working out romantically but being best friends because of how I choose to understand them. but jack falling for Katherine and feeling for the first time like he's worth the attention of somebody he would usually see as above him. and Katherine falling for jack and actually living the theoretical ideas she's had about class divides and social structure. it's good for them. Katherine gets a glimpse at the world she's never truly understood before, puts her own privilege in perspective while also having the chance to get them to see it's not truly us vs them when there's also so many layers to being a woman in 1899, especially a woman with career ambitions and a controlling father with the ability to kill her career with a single word. even being an heiress doesn't stop your father from being an asshole who wants to ruin your life because you don't want to play by his rules. and jack gets to see that there is kindness and softness is the world for him, and not just the kindness and softness he has to fight his way to. he gets to experience somebody who knows him and knows his flaws and failures and the way he crumbles under too much pressure from himself and still chooses to love him despite all of that, he gets to have a soft place to land and also a place to learn and grow from somebody who parallels him in a lot of unexpected ways. they but heads and argue and maybe it isn't always smooth sailing and maybe they realize eventually that their love has settled into something other than romantic, but those changes and lessons and life experiences are there forever and changed them and made them better.

[randomnameless]

A Master’s Thesis for a university no less

-----

Yep, I’ve seen that!

at least that people got some dedication, I nearly died when I wrote mine but it wasn’t for shitposting so maybe that made it even more tedious lol

But I’d say, how can you even write a Thesis about something as empty as Fodlan? I think the writer mentionned how Supreme Leader didn’t attack civilians but... while we don’t see her do it, Ashe mentions they’re starving, Baldo’n’Waldi must come from somewhere (the experiments started in Remire, before the War, but obviously to be used for said war in, basically, Supreme Leader’s maternal territories!) and I guess the religious people fleeing the Empire or not bothering to send letters to their friends who don’t hear about them anymore since the war started must have been busy Zumba’ing with Rhea in the 5 stars Enbarr resort.

As someone from SPE (!) mentionned, the Fodlan games take explicit care not to have anyone seriously challenge her beliefs of criticise her, or give spotlight to her main, self-perceived, nemesis who... well, is either fridged, exists off-screen or gives infodumps before dying.

Which makes any discussion about a “Just War” completely moot - Watsonian wise, especially if you take Fodlan as this entity functionning under the Crust System - same, Doylist wise, with any comparisons with real world Conventions (iirc OP mentionned that one of they juries asked if taking a dragon prisoner could be considered a war crime or something like that lol) because, hey, it’s a video game basically centered around a gameplay mechanic of depleting a red unit’s HP bar by hitting them with a weapon.

This is basically a really good shitpost which shows a lot of dedication - and that’s the kind of stuff fandom thrives for (remember zigludo chan sama senpai’s wiki page?) !

but as a serious/discourse/meta piece...

It’s basically the same redshit 10k words, with a bit more formatting and no word limit.

I mean, I used the search engine for “nabatean” and found nothing, and I think you can’t valably discuss Supreme Leader’s motives, ignoring this 

“You are a child of the goddess. You must not be allowed power over the people!“

part of her reasoning to fight against the Church.

Not wanting to give that chamber pot any credit, but if they sprout heinous arguments to support their fave, imo, it’s basically because even the members of that hellpit noticed Supreme Leader’s, uh, fondness for Nabateans as a species, and since she can’t do anything BaD or be wrong, it means the species are BaD.

[cisthoughtcrime]

.

[officialkendallroy]

if i posted something on here in regards towards the research of my master's thesis would you guys help me out pls....... 🫶🏻

[lord-squiggletits]

On the MegOP fandom trend of saying "Optimus should apologize to Megatron"

(Speaking specifically for IDW1, though it applies to a lot of MegOP especially ones that do continuity soup with heavy reference to IDW1)

I was talking to a friend in DMs and they mentioned a common headcanon/fanfic trope that I also concurred with, and both of us said it's something that bothers us: a common take in the MegOP fandom goes basically along the lines of "If Optimus had just apologized to Megatron, the war would've ended" (or other variants including "if he'd tried harder to understand Megatron/work in collaboration with him").

And firstly, this is incorrect for a number of reasons:

There were attempts at peace negotiations during the war, but they fell through. So Optimus WAS trying to work with Megatron to the point of participating in formal diplomatic meetings.

Optimus tried multiple times on page to convince Megatron to just stop fighting and work with him for peace (Autocracy, Chaos Theory) that Megatron rejected. Given that these on-page examples take place at the start of the war and at the end of the war respectively, it makes sense that Optimus asking Megatron for collaboration is something he was trying/willing to do the entire time. So again, Optimus was always willing AND ATTEMPTING to work with Megatron and find a joint solution

Even before the war when Optimus was still Orion, he was very explicitly inspired by Megatron's writing and names Megatron as one of the people who "opened his eyes" to the wrongs of Cybertronian society. So how is it that people claim "the war went on for too long because Optimus never tried to understand Megatron" when OP literally named Megatron as one of his biggest idols, thus implying that OP does understand Megatron's ideals

But the primary purpose of this post wasn't to defend Optimus, actually. Even though I personally think Optimus did plenty (dare I say, everything) to try to end the war, there are some who may still think otherwise, so instead of arguing about whether Optimus did "enough", or who should apologize to whom, or who "deserves the blame" for starting/continuing the war, I'd actually rather talk about this:

No matter who is most "to blame" for the war, it's my firm belief that neither Megatron nor Optimus would even expect/demand the other to apologize to them at all.

On Megatron's side, he would never seek to judge Optimus negatively for the decisions to the point of saying "you wronged me, apologize." Whether it's evil Megatron who doesn't care about atrocities and revels in an opportunity to expose Optimus as a hypocrite, or post-war/Autobot Megatron who knows that his own evil actions are irredeemable, the idea of Megatron judging Optimus and demanding an apology for the war specifically strikes me as out-of-character. Why would Megatron demand or even want an apology from Optimus when Megatron knows fully well that he has his own sins to bear, he prolonged the war for his own selfish/material gain, and that he is responsible for an untold amount of suffering? Demanding an apology would imply that Megatron sees himself as the wronged party and Optimus as the wrongdoer, but by the end of the war, Megatron is too aware of his own part in the war to ever demand such a thing of Optimus. Even if he DID think that Optimus was "equally to blame" for the war (which he doesn't/wouldn't, btw), Megatron's own feelings of guilt would prevent him from trying to seek the petty satisfaction of the moral high ground or making Optimus beg for his forgiveness.

Additionally, Megatron knows Optimus very well as a person: he knows that the position of leadership is full of "loneliness [and] agonizing self-doubt" for Optimus (Chaos Theory) and that "when Optimus hurts others, he hurts himself" (MTMTE). Another reason that Megatron wouldn't demand nor want an apology from Optimus is because Megatron knows Optimus so well that he already knows that being a war leader fills Optimus with immense guilt and suffering. Given that Megatron knows about Optimus' self-doubt and guilt, why would he even need an apology when he already knows how much Optimus regrets the war and desperately wishes/wished for it to end?

Then, as established in the previous paragraphs, Optimus is too full of guilt for his part in the war (both before it started and in being unable to stop it sooner) to demand an apology from Megatron. Again, demanding an apology would put Optimus in an implied position of moral superiority and/or victimhood, but Optimus doesn't see himself as morally superior or as a victim (or rather, he sees himself as being responsible for these bad things happening and internalizes this as a duty to do better/fix wrongdoings). In other words, Megatron and Optimus both share this view of themselves and each other: Their hands are so dirty, and they both feel such guilt over this, and they know each other well enough to know that the other feels this way as well. Because both of them feel blame for the war and are acutely aware of their own flaws/part in suffering, both of them feel far too responsible for the war happening for them to ever blame their archnemesis for "not trying harder" or "being responsible for the war."

Hell, if you even look at the socio-political climate of Cybertron before the war started, neither Megatron nor Optimus were the ones who put this conflict into motion. The corrupt legacy of the Primes, Functionism, class issues-- all of these things existed before Megatron and Optimus did. Even once they started doing things like writing about social issues (M) or fighting against the Senate (OP), both of them were "underlings" in sense that they weren't leaders:

Megatron's writings may have inspired the Decepticon movement, but that movement existed as an independent entity with its own leaders and speakers long before Megatron became the "official" ruler of the Decepticons. He wasn't even the leader of the 'Cons until he took control of the gladiator arena and the nonviolent sections of the Decepticons were (presumably) subsumed into the underground, exploitative battle culture that Megatron created.

Optimus-as-Orion was a police officer to start, but even once he started going against the Senate, he mainly worked in collaboration with others like Senator Shockwave and Zeta (later Zeta Prime), who he either saw as his idols or who were literally superior to him in rank due to government/military structures.

So with this in mind, even from a social level, while Megatron and Optimus may have been "catalysts" of a sort that caused the war to escalate to an outright planetary/galactic level, the scenario is too complex to solely lay the blame for the war at either of their feet. I'm not confident in saying that Megatron/Optimus would explicitly think of this when talking to each other, but what I'm trying to say is that M/OP were just catalysts in a long chain of brewing tension that exploded into a war. Even if one could claim that one of them "started" or "escalated" the war, the social issues that caused the war and the positions of power that allowed them to become leaders in the first place were falling into place before either of them actually BECAME leaders.

In other words, this shared fate of being the final reaction that exploded a societal conflict into outright war... Megatron and Optimus both have that in common. And because of this, I really don't think either of them would even think to ask the other to apologize because they're both in such similar positions, with such similar feelings of guilt and responsibility, that they understand each other's feelings without words. To demand an apology would be akin to taking that shared vulnerability/guilt and stepping on it, attempting to claim that one is right/superior and the other is wrong/inferior, and that the inferior one needs to grovel and take responsibility for the bad things that happened.