#it's almost 3am why am I like this. time to go the fuck to sleep!!!

[six-improbable-things]

I had to open the ship combat rules doc I made for Rook's campaign the other day, and man, that thing was (and still is tbh) my fucking magnum opus. I put so much effort into creating rules for a type of combat that dnd doesn't naturally support, and it was SUCH a fun challenge. I'll admit it's not perfect, but it works for our campaign, and everyone seemed to like it during our one test so far, so that's good enough for me.

I think between the stat blocks, the rules themselves, and the maps of the ships, I spent easily 48 hours total on making this sailing arc happen. (No, I'm not the DM, I just like homebrewing shit, and also happen to be the one who decided to play a pirate and make that involved in the story.)

[hyperexplosion]

.

[mayisgoingnuts]

I saw the requests for fics were open I just need to ask if it's ok to put one in and if it's ok to have an x reader even if platonic bc honestly I'm in a mood lol and I am craving LER ALASTOR idk why and I love your fics and you are a great writer

Author's note: EVERYTHING I NEEDED WAS AN IDEA AND WHEN YOU POSTED THAT ONE PROMPT I WENT

I KNOW WHAT I GOT TO DO NOW.

————————————————————————

"Good night"

Summary: You were struggling to sleep that night, so in defeat, decided to just give up and stay up all night. Sadly for you, Alastor didn't exactly approved your idea.

Warnings: Swearing.

————————————————————————

Bags under your eyes would appear if you didn't go to sleep, and you knew it pretty well. It sucks, really sucks, but laying down on your bed doing nothing and being unable to finally take a good night of sleep sucks the double of those two combined.

As much as the TV wasn't that entertaining, it was enough to keep you awake and slightly less bored.

3AM, still nothing. You took a nap on the couch, but then woke up again. Did you actually took a nap? Or did you brain just turned off? Not sure, not bothered enough to care.

But, suddenly, something else finally got your eyes off of the screen.

"And what are you doing down here so late?"

The sudden voice made you stop on your tracks, jump even, as it came right after hours of silence.

"Jesus fucking Christ Alastor, I almost had a heart attack!" You took a deep breath, calming yourself down. "I'm just watching TV."

Alastor looks to the TV with the corner of his eyes, squeezing them slightly to show his displeasure. "Those things can be quite unhealthy at this time, my dear. Why don't you just turn this off and go to sleep?"

"Because I don't wanna and I can't sleep." You didn't even wanted to sound abrupt, but your filters slowly disappear when you grow more and more tired.

"Now that's just rude." Replied, not offended at all but rather keeping this in his mind for later. "Can't sleep, you say? Well, I have a solution for that." He added with a confident grin.

"...does it include hitting my head onto a wall to knock me out or something?"

Alastor stared at you with a blank face, blinking a few times. "Two solutions."

You rolled your eyes and finally sat, raising an eyebrow. "What solution?"

Alastor lets out a snicker, and with a single snap of his fingers, both of you are back on your room. You fell on your bed a bit too aggressively, but it's not like he cares.

"We only need to get rid of that energy of yours. I'm sure it'll be as easy as pie, you're already almost falling asleep."

"Uh... okay... and what's your plan, exactly?"

Your question made him look at you mischievously, which startled you and already made you let your guard up.

"Alastor-"

But before you could react, something pinched your side right behind you. As you looked, it was one of Alastor's little creatures. Is that a little man? A doll? A little demon? A pet? Whatever this thing is, made you flinch with a single touch.

And just like Alastor could spawn one of those, getting more of them needed the exact same effort.

"What are those??"

"Oh, I never really gave them names, so call them whatever you want. They're also harmless."

Three of them surrounded you, poking your upperbody in different spots while giggling.

"H-Hey! Gehehet off!" They may be weird but also looked weirdly adorable, what made you hesitated on pushing them away. "Thehehey're tick-"

But you stopped yourself right away. It got the other demon's attention, since your fit of giggles was definitely not the cause of the sudden hold up.

"Did you just interrupted yourself?" He asked teasingly, leaning towards you with a more bratty smile.

"Whahahat?! Nohohoho!"

Alastor shrugged, throwing his staff lightly from one hand to another. "If that's the case, I must have misunderstood. After all, there's no reason for you to not say 'tickle'." His head turned back to you, curiously. "Correct?"

As they keep tickling you, you ended up falling on the bed, rolling back and fourth as a poor attempt to escape. "ShuhUHUHUT UP!"

The deer chuckled at your reaction to it. "Oh, I'm not the one who should! Your volume may wake up someone in the hotel."

"Thehehen STOHOP!"

Your words entered his ear and leaved the other, or even worse, didn't even entered in any at the first place, as everything he did was look at his nails.

"I can't, I already promised to help. It is getting you tired after all-"

"FUHUHUHUCK!!"

Your tone suddenly increased in a... huge volume. More than he expected, what startled the guy. Wanting or not, if anyone wakes up he'll end up getting in trouble aswell, so he's thinking twice about his plans.

However, something is off for him. Once you lay down, you didn't got up again nor tried to. It definitely isn't bothering you as much as it looks like, and this fact did not make it worse for himself. More likely to be the opposite, as an encouragement.

The inner conflict was agonizing to keep, and Alastor's eyes show that. With a sigh mixed with a humming, he snaps his fingers, finally sparing you from the shadows.

Your laughter slowly died down, and without realizing, your face shifts to one of disappointment.

"Hah... heh... what..?"

The taller one sits by your side, avoiding visual contact but, for some reason, not the physical one.

Before you could react, Alastor quickly recomposed himself, looking at you with a cheeky grin once again while his own hand touches your stomach.

"It is unfair for me to get punished because of your sensitivity, so I'll try something lighter this time."

The demon's fingers began to scratch, but not hurt, tickling you in a slow yet surprisingly effective way. You grabbed his wrist, but didn't have the courage to take it off as you knew it would come to an end if you did.

Your chuckles, snorts, cackles, any noises you would make, would spread the room as long as he wanted, and the silence would only return once you're finally asleep.

[littleredwing89]

FAMOUS - PART ONE

Bodyguard!Jason Todd x Singer!Reader

Warnings: Language. Mentions of death threats.

A/N: So part one is finally here!!! Woohoo!!! Enjoy all. More to come soon xoxo much love xoxo @offendedfishnoises thanks again for all of your help with this - all the love xoxo

————

DEATH SHALL FIND YOU

————

The Gotham Sirens.

You never imagined that this would happen to you. Not in a million years. The group had taken off almost instantly and you’d become world famous. You stared up at the stage, the neon blue of your band's name glowing. Several technicians ran past you and smiled, altering the mic stands and taping down the wires so no one would fall. You loved the hustle and bustle just before the performance. Even standing on that stage in front of millions of people, nothing made your soul buzz like the beginning set up of a show.

You, Selina, Ivy and Harley had met at Gotham University majoring in Dance and Music. At first it had been nothing more than just a class assignment. Create a song. But Harley uploaded it onto Instagram and it blew up the internet. The next thing you knew, Mr Roman Sionis - headhunter for Dent Sounds Record Label - himself had arranged a meeting with the four of you.

And well, as they say, the rest was history. That was over 3 years ago now. It had been a complete blur. You were still catching up. You were no longer having to scrimp and save for cash. No. Now, now you had everything. Everything you’d ever dreamed of. Everything but your privacy. Especially after the meeting this morning with Roman.

——

“You’re not being serious are you?”.

You looked into the mirror whilst the make up artist finished off your eyelashes. Your manager, Roman, stood behind you with his arms crossed. A stern look stitched onto his face.

“Of course I am”, he huffed and his stare burned into you, “You’ve received another death threat and someone tried to break into your condo last month. You need more security. Something more personal”.

You rolled your eyes and the make up artist scolded you by smacking her brush on your wrist. You grinned cheekily at her before resting back in your chair, putting on your sickliest, sweetest voice, “Romy…”.

Your little nickname for him. It worked every time. He’d never allow anyone else to call him that. Just you.

“No”, he growled, “This is my final decision. You’re getting a personal bodyguard. I don’t want to find you chopped into tiny pieces”.

“How come Ivy doesn’t have to have one? Or Selina...even Harley doesn’t! So why me?”.

You didn’t need a bodyguard. You knew the second you got one, you would be kissing your freedom goodbye. They’d be with you 24/7. Your apartment would be shared. You wouldn’t even be able to sneak off to McDonalds for a McFlurry at 3am without having to confirm it with them. Or even worse, have them go with you.

“They haven’t had any psychotic stalkers”, Roman rested against the wall, sighing deeply, “yet”.

You scowled and refused to meet his eyes in the mirror. This was a complete over reaction.

“Look, I know you’re not happy but this goes way over my head. Mr Dent, the CEO—insisted. And to be honest Y/N, I think it’s a good idea. You girls are only getting more popular and that means more weirdos will crawl out of the woodwork”.

“Romy…”, you tried once more, turning to him and fluttering your dark, thick lashes at him, “Can’t you talk to Mr Dent?”.

He pressed a hand to his forehead, the muscles in his forearms contracting. You noticed the dark shadows under his eyes and silently wondered when he last got a good night's sleep.

“I’m sorry”, he muttered, “But I agree with Harv on this one, I’ve already been in touch with a firm. They’re highly recommended…you’ll meet them tomorrow”.

He turned quickly and strode out of the changing room as his phone rang, ending the conversation abruptly. You could hear his booming voice bouncing down the corridor and you glared at yourself in the mirror.

Fucking perfect.

————

Dumping a wad of paperwork down onto the desk, Jason sighed and took a long sip of his coffee. He knew high profile clientele came with difficulty but the stack of paperwork Sionis had sent him was nothing short of ridiculous. They even wanted to know where he’d bought his new leather jacket from last month.

“Alright?”, Roy sauntered over with his own coffee cup shuffling some of the papers. He was awfully chipper this early in the morning. Jason hummed in response and grabbed a pen from the side beginning to fill in the required forms.

He’d started this business with Roy a few years ago. Dropping out of university was tough but it wasn’t for him. Jason remembered worrying about telling Bruce. What his family would think of him but they showed him nothing but support. Unconditional love. They’d both managed, with countless hours, to build ‘Outlaws Security’, into the most successful security firm in Gotham.

Roy’s eyebrows lifted upon seeing a photo of the new client, “Isn’t that the chick you had on your wall at uni?”.

“What? No!”, Jason bristled and shoved the photo of you back under the documents. He inwardly cursed. Fucking Roy.

“So, you're saying that if I look inside your office locker, I won't find a poster of her?”.

Jason heard the cocky smirk on Roy’s face and groaned in irritation running a hand over the front of his face, “Touch my locker and I’ll break your legs”.

Roy cackled loudly and sat on the edge of Jason’s desk, “Ok so you do still have it. Better not let her find it”.

“You’re a real jackass you know”.

“So I’ve heard...maybe she’ll sign it for you if you ask nicely”, Roy continued to mock Jason, making kissy faces at him.

“Why don’t you shut your mouth before I shut it for you”, Jason scowled and turned his chair around pretending to look for some files in the cabinet behind him. Hoping Roy would get the hint and leave him alone.

“This must be like your dream job come true, pretty boy—better not screw it up”.

Jason sighed deeply and threw his head back in exasperation, “I need a new best friend”.

Roy gasped dramatically and held a hand over his heart, “What?! You love me and you know it!”.

“Whoever told you that was lying”.

————

[murdocksapostasy]

Hello sweetheart, my heart and body aches for a fic with frank and matt. Both want reader. Matt always dissapoits reader (because he cant call back or gets busy at night doing his thing) and frank is the cutie he is and comforts her (like let her forget matt) he hears her little wimpers while patroling. Frank and matt always being cocky at each other bout reader and who shes gonna like more? You know that typical frank matt dynamic I LOVE THAT ❤️

hi hun, matt and frank are an incredible duo i totally agree so here you go!

*3am*

you wake up from a shallow sleep, you feel wind blowing on your skin, “odd” you think. your bedroom window is wide open, you turn over in bed realising you’re alone, for fucks sake matt. again? when are you ever gonna get a good and peaceful nights rest with him, you get up trying to adjust your eyes to the dark looking for your phone. you call and you call, with each voicemail driving you more into worry and anger. eventually matt answers

“i can’t talk right now my love.” before you can get a word in the phone hangs up. you’re sick of this. worried to pieces and so pissed off. this is horrible. you start crying, you can’t help it anymore with how unreliable and dismissive he’s being all the time. it’s not fair. you make another phone call this it’s not to matt, but to frank. he barely gave your phone time to ring before picking up. “hey is everything okay?” he says,

“yeah um. it’s just matt again im worried” frank can tell by the way you’re speaking that you’re tired and anxious it isn’t the first time you’ve called with something like this. “do you want me to get ahold of him?” he asks dreading your answer. “i don’t know frank. it feels useless, he’s gonna do the same thing tomorrow anyway” the hopelessness in your voice is undeniable

“how about i come get you?”

“yeah i’d like that” your answer is almost hesitant. he’s never suggested anything like this before.

“i’ll be there, we can give red a scare when he gets back. see how he likes you not picking up the phone huh?” a slight smile appears on your face. “thanks frank i’ll see you.”

*4 am*

you’re sitting franks apartment on your third drink. kinda slurring your words, you’re laid out on his couch dumping your drunk babble on him “he thinks he’s so mysterious.. i hate it if i’m so important why is it-” “you are important”frank cuts you off. silence lingers in the air for a little, “i should get you to bed maybe, i’ll take the couch don’t worry”

“i don’t know. i don’t wanna worry my matthew”

“worry him then. it’ll be a taste of his own medicine. fucker hasn’t a right to treat you like that anyway” franks words are filled with a bitterness, like seeing you mistreated genuinely *hurts him.*

“but what if he thinks something happened to me frank?”

“nothing has. and nothing will i’ve got you”

[judeloverr]

I really have a thing for domestic fluff can we get one where kylian is having a bad day like maybe he lost a gamw or something and when he sees you he begins to feel better about it and you take care of him

sad - kylian mbappe

summary: basically what the request says, just changed a tad

kylian mbappe x reader

word count : 1.1K

authors note: god damn it’s been a fucking long time but i’m baaackkkk

you watched the tv screen as the camera directly focused on your boyfriend who was walking toward the tunnel to get away from the pitch and the screaming Bayern fans as they celebrated the win against PSG allowing them to be in the next round of the champions league. you sat comfortably on your sofa, wearing one of kylians shirts and a pair of cotton shorts.

you could sense Kylian getting angry due to the constant camera being in front of him while he walked down the corridor, walking through a door into the changing rooms.

you sighed slightly, knowing he was going to beat himself about it and re-watch the match over and over again and pinpoint each moment he could have done better to score a goal. you knew him more than he knew himself, he would be sad for a couple of days, being extra clingy with you, and constantly wanting hugs. you pulled out your phone deciding on whether to text him or not, however, you knew it would make him feel better if he got a message from you.

kyky❤️❤️

i am so proud of you, don’t beat yourself up. ill be in bed when you get back but call if you need anything and there’s food in the fridge if you want. see you later love you lots xxx

you press send and turn off the tv, nothing was happening only the commentators talking about psg performance. after getting everything sorted downstairs, putting his food which he probably won’t eat on the side and you finally made your way up the stairs, the sleep slowly creeping up on you making your body tired while walking up the stairs and your eyes starting to stop slowly. 

3am

you were woken up by the shuffling of the bed, jumping slightly whole body aware, totally forgetting that kylian was coming back. you breathed in deeply and watched him move the duvet over the both of you.

“it's just me” kylian whispered, lying his head on his pillow, you could tell by the frown on his face that he was very disappointed in his team's performance.

“you scared me” you laughed lightly, turning on your side to face kylian, putting your hands under your head to get more comfortable. kylian moved over to you, putting his face into the crook of your neck, knowing he wanted to rest on you, you moved onto your back allowing kylian to rest his head on your chest. his arm going under your shirt to hold your waist, squeezing your hip lightly and exhaling deeply. your nails made their way to his bare back scratching the skin, relaxing him instantly.

“how was the flight?” you could feel kylians fingers moving against your stomach relaxing you, sleep overtaking your body slowly.

“it was fine” you heard kylian take a deep breath, his head digging closer into your chest.

after a couple of seconds of silence, you decide to ask, "kylian you can talk to me you know?"

kylian stayed silent for a second before moving his head from your chest to your pillow making you shift on your side, faces very close your noses were almost touching. kylians eyes are fixed onto yours, and you notice his tired eyes and drained-out face. your hand made its way to his face, palm laying on his cheek and your thumb rubbing under his eye softly, watching him as his eyes slowly shut and open again.

"i know, it's just hard and i feel a lot better now at home with you, you should have seen me earlier, i was alot more emotion" kylian laughs lightly at the last bit, bring a grin onto your face aswell.

"i just-" he stops and opens his eyes to see you directly focused on him. "i just keep replaying the match, why didn't i just run a bit faster to get the ball or why didn't i do a better tackle on him or pass the ball differently, like my brain won't fucking stop and its pissing me off" kylian finishes his rant anger in his voice, he breathes heavily and brings his head closer to yours, noses actually touching now.

"i know baby" kylian smiles lightly at the nickname, you knowing he loves it and always makes him feel better. "i know you feel like that, i can see the gears in your head constantly turning and sometimes i see you replaying the match on your phone thinking i don't see" kylian lightly chuckles, his hand making its way to your waist and his legs moving to get tangled with yours "but remember its not all your fault, your a team and you work together and today just wasn't one of those days, so don't take all the blame because I can tell you its not your fault''

you stay silent, thumb rubbing his cheek again. kylian doesn't say anything but you watch his eyes move to your lips, eyes, and then lips again. you feel his hot breath against your lips, waiting patiently for him to kiss you.

you watch as he leans in, placing his warm lips on top of your cold ones. kylians hand goes to your head, bringing you in closer. his lips move against yours slowly and gently. your breath hitches as he bites your lip and groans leaving his mouth as you scratch the back of his head.

you pull away a smile printed on your face as you watch kylian go back into his oringal postion.

"you know i love you right?" kylian questions.

"i don't know, do you?" you laugh at kylians face, and he squints his eyes at you.

"well i do, i tell you every day that i love you" kylian pulls you closer to him, allowing you to rest your head on his chest, his hand going on your back rubbing up and down gently.

lifting your head to look at your boyfriend, his face trained on yours, not saying anything. you start to wonder if you said anything wrong.

''what?"

''nothing'' kylian unexpectedly rolls over pinning you down on the bed while he hovers over you, a laugh leaves your mouth as the movement wasn't expected from you. ''it's just that i love you so fucking much and you make everything better, and really don't know what i would do without you mon amour''

his little confession made your heart melt, warmness fills your body, and butterflies in your stomach. '' i love you too, so fucking much" you grab his face with your hands and pull him down to you, you don't miss the subtle shift in his hips against yours. you go to his lips but purposely missed them and go to whisper in his ear.

"why don't you show me how much you love me, kyky?"

[catiuskaa]

My Atlantis [don’t go]

inspired by the songs “atlantis” by Seafret and “can I call you tonight?” by Dayglow.

because the combination chan + second chance + angsty prompts AND my recent ability to fall asleep only past 3am triggered something I didn't know I had in me, lol (I swear I am ok LMAOO)

word count: 3.9k

angst, second chance, good ending.

No matter how many times he had asked himself the past month, he never could come up with a reason for it.

“Chan, you ok?” Seungmin inquired, popping his head through the door. The eldest snapped out of his zoned-out state and smiled, starting to tease the younger in a sing-song voice.

“Aw, Seungminnie, you’re so cute!”

Since the comeback, the members had all been busy, and it was known by the other seven that despite the lack of sleep and rest, the many concerts and shows. If there was one of them that would never say anything about how fucked up he felt, it was Chan.

Chan wouldn’t complain about anything. He’d rather stay hidden, quiet, hoping to merge with the furniture in his room so he wouldn’t feel so tired anymore.

It wasn’t new for the others, and Chris always felt a speck of guilt trail up his spine when any of them came by his room, only to find him sunken in his computer, his headphones blasting music so loudly that there was no hope of calling for the Australian unless you poked him —or in Minho’s case, throwing anything remotely close to the target, like his slipper, usually passed the level— Chan would go into off mode.

What they didn’t know, however, is why. Because usually, he was just tired, but nowadays, there is another reason.

He often trailed off conversations, zoning out. He had always been like that, often related to his insomnia.

Only one member knew the existence of the other new reason.

You.

“Hey, I made brownies!” Felix shined, entering his fellow bandmate’s room.

Lix watched Chan munch on his baked goods for what felt like a lifetime.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he said, the corners of his mouth full of crumbs, like his bed.

“I didn’t say anything.”

Chan tsked, smiling weakly. He had fallen for it. “Never fucking mind. Can I get a hug?”

Felix held back his tears, approaching the elder in a tight embrace. Chan’s strong facade crumbled.

“You should go see her, Chan. I don’t care what you have to say about it, but whatever happened is breaking you apart. It’s been so long, anyways.”

Chan laughed, even though he sighed slightly heavier than usual, with a teary grin on his features.

“I still fucked up, mate, whether it’s one week or one year. I fucked up bad.” He stopped and swallowed dry, quickly brushing away the tears that threatened to fall. “I can’t just show up at her place.”

The younger brushed away a stray tear that ran down his cheek. “You either go there or let it eat you from the inside,” Felix spoke carefully. “And I won’t give you the second choice. If you don’t go with her, I’ll make the call. That is your choice.”

Even if he found himself walking to your apartment, unconsciously, he still couldn’t give an answer to the question that kept bugging his mind.

He listened to the sound the birds made despite it being so late. He moved slowly, almost wandering, until the door to your home surprised him. He felt a shiver run up and down his spine. You weren’t exactly on speaking terms.

God, he was so scared. What was he doing?

He cursed under his breath, cussing himself out, his stupidness, his acts. He started crying without realising.

What else, if not him being an idiot, would explain why he had lost you?

“Chris?”

No one except you said his name in a way that felt so different, so special.

“…Is everything ok?”

He turned around to face you. He felt the tears run down his cheeks, ending on his lips, tasting the salty drops.

“Darling…” He mentioned, his tone anxious, his breathing erratic.

He woke up in a cold sweat. Again, the dream kept repeating, with that detail that always hurt him like the first time. He couldn’t approach you, or he’d wake up, yet he still tried, walking towards you just to open his eyes to face his room’s ceiling.

That was why he couldn’t sleep.

He felt like he deserved it, so he didn’t say anything and decided to put up a fake smile, hoping that one day he’d wake up, either having hugged you or not having that same dream again.

He fell again for you, more profound than he thought possible, and he knew it because just the thought of you pulling him into an embrace felt even better than all the kisses you two had shared. And then it hit him, the answer to his question, one he suddenly despised more than anything.

Why did he let you go?

At first, it was an easy answer. He couldn’t save you from himself, from what surrounded him. He could never take back the things he had said that dreadful night a month ago, when he had lied to you just because he was afraid, afraid of love, terrified of the feelings he had developed for you, and so, so scared that you would get hurt because of him. It wasn’t fair for you, even if he meant entirely the opposite and had just realised how deeply he had fallen for you.

Because in a twist of events, his mind, his days, his songs, everything screamed your name, like a chant you wouldn’t- you couldn’t forget.

“I’m so fucking stupid,” he cried, clinging to his pillow.

Changbin stared wide-eyed at Felix, both able to hear what was happening behind the door between them.

“You call her, or do I?” Bin sighed.

Felix’s eyes almost snapped out of place.

“Since when do you-?”

“C’mon, everyone here knows. He’s so fucking obvious, sighing all day long. It’s going to make him age faster.” Changbin somewhat mocked in a solemn tone. “So?” He shook his phone sideways.

“S’fine. I’m on it.”

Changbin then entered the room, startling Chan, who, after seeing the troublesome look in his friend’s eyes, quickly approached him, leaning on the crook of his neck. The rapper patted his back.

“Why does it ache so much?” Chan questioned weakly, feeling stupid. “I know the fucking dream by heart. How often do I have to see it again until it doesn’t hurt?”

“Because you care, Chan. It’ll hurt.”

“For how long?” He sounded in so much pain.

At this, Changbin sighed sadly.

“As long as you love her.”

[☆ ☆ ✧ ☆ ☆]

When Chris went to open the door days later, he expected anyone behind it. Maybe it was Felix with more brownies, perhaps Changbin wanted to force him out of bed to go to the gym, or Jeongin needed his computer password again.

What he didn’t expect, however, was your figure on the other side, looking even prettier than any of the dreams he had about you.

You took a deep breath, but before you could say anything, he slammed the door, closing it. You could hear him leaning on it, sliding to the floor.

“Fuck, angel,” you cursed.

Angel. The nickname felt like a punch in the face, but he couldn’t help but want another one.

Instead of leaving, you leaned on the door, technically back to back if it weren’t for the wooden structure.

“Felix called me,” you started carefully, head directed towards the door. “Wanna talk about why? He didn’t say.”

Chan remained silent, feeling troubled because, on one side, seeing you could be his downfall, still fuck did he want to let go so much.

But he couldn’t. He had said it himself, year after year, hearing it too many times so that he had it tattoed on his mind. Why were you still behind that door?

Your sad laugh broke him into even more pieces.

“I fell in love, Chan,” you started, staring at the ceiling. “I fell in love with a man so selfless who would die for his loved ones, a man so integrally beautiful that he had no reason to hide his scars because even his battles were gorgeous.” You quickly rubbed your eyes, feeling them itchy as you held back tears. “And I didn’t do it knowing that it would be hard. I just...”

The corridor remained silent as much as the door stayed locked, the man behind it feeling like a small child who needed a big hug.

You gasped for air, your chest tightening, for your need to crumble, cry, and fall.

“Even if I didn’t know back then the crazy fans I’d have to face, or any of Dispatch’s cameramen, I…” Your tearful smile fainted a bit, your features as serious as you were about your feelings.

“I promised myself that if I was right, and you loved me as much as I know I love you, I’d fight for you.”

You unknowingly cried with him, knowing that no one, not even him, could save you from falling as intensely as possible and even more.

He had tried to protect you, save you, keeping you at a safe distance because he didn’t want to hurt you, but God, did it hurt being away from you. He was missing you, even when you were right by his side.

“I believe I did my fucking best, angel. I know you have feelings that make you think you’re the one to blame for what happened, and that makes you just want to give up, and I get it, Chan. That’s not your fault. But when I got hurt because of the accident, it wasn’t your fault either,” you sniffed, looking at the bandage that still covered your forearm, the ankle support you were wearing also crossed your mind.

“Why… why don’t you let me love you?”

You waited patiently, turning so silently that you could swear you heard his unsteady breathing.

“…you said it.”

Your heart skipped a beat when you heard his voice toned down as if he was hiding his face in between his legs.

“I said it wasn’t easy, angel, but that doesn’t mean that I am not willing to try. Don’t think for a second that means I’m giving up on you.”

You sighed, looking at the cloudy day through the window before you.

“Even knowing what I know now, I’d do it again, my angel.”

The silence threatened to break your heart, but you chose to keep fighting against it. You weren’t going to give up. Not yet.

You could still fight for him. Yeah. You could.

“I’m going to leave my sweater here.” You mentioned in a low tone of voice, your features showed calm before the storm. “After I leave, I’ll call and ask for it, and you’ll say that you can stop by my place tomorrow.”

He looked behind him as if he could see through the door. A small and sad smile was planted on his features as he couldn’t help but think your ideas were still as cute as he remembered them. You rose from the door with a grunt, your eyes red and teary, glued to the floor.

“You were always worth every fucking ounce of my effort, Chris, don’t you ever forget that.” 

In a sudden motion, you turned to face the door, startling him when you aggressively grabbed the doorknob, making it tremble, even though you never opened it.

“If… if you choose to just keep the sweater and call it a day,” you gasped, tears running down your cheeks silently. “I need you to know that I never believed what you said that night and… that I love you, angel.”

[☆ ☆ ✧ ☆ ☆]

That night. The night.

The night where he had fucked up so badly.

His mind was a fucking mess, thoughts of you reeling in every minute. Your voice through the door, through the phone when you called asking for your oversized sweater —the same one he was wearing at the moment—.

The memory replayed itself, like how those we want to forget but keep haunting you, coming back.

A month ago, he had gotten a call from the hospital and had 100% freaked out. You mentioned you were fine, that it had just been an accident, but the man decided to rush to you regardless.

“Chris?” You noticed him tense up when you saw him enter your hospital room, his expression clouded with worry.

“Darling, what...? W-what happened?” His lips trembled, eyes wandering to the cast on your left leg and the bandage that trailed your right forearm.

“You should’ve seen the others,” you teased but sighed. “I need you to sit and calm down for a second, love,” you started.

The nickname made him hold back shivers because deep down he knew that if you didn’t call him ‘angel’ it was because something was wrong. He sat on the closest chair he could pick, moving it as if it weighed nothing, and turned to face you as fast as he could.

“I was surrounded by some sasaengs and cameramen. I’ve been for the past week. I never mentioned it to you because there’s no damn way you can do anything about it, and I don’t want to get between you and your job. It’s not my world, and besides, I can tolerate pictures or getting recognized, but, this time...” You took his hand into yours, his glare dull and worried, but you weren’t planning to lie to him after this, so you continued. “The cameramen surrounded me, and that attracted a group of girls. One of them threw coffee at me. Others felt brave enough to start screaming at me, explaining why my relationship was fake and that Chan, well, you, didn’t really love me.” You let out a snicker, but the smile didn’t reach your eyes.

Chris’ mind was working at full speed, immediately blaming himself for not knowing, for not noticing, for not doing anything else rather than what the company told him to do when netizens found out about your existence.

Deny, deny and deny. He lied his way through, but as the events were showing, it wasn’t enough. It was never enough.

He wasn’t enough.

You stroked his face lightly, waking him up.

“I’m okay, angel. I just happened to trip and fall in the wrong place and at the wrong time, and they didn’t care too much about me.” You smiled, sparing him the tale about how the girls started hitting you and throwing stuff at you, the cameramen stepping on you, either accidentally or on purpose. Chan’s eyes got teary when your smile didn’t reach your eyes.

You were in pain, in a hospital, just because of him? That felt… wrong. He loved you, so, so much. He needed to protect you, not just ignore the problem until it solved itself, even if he never knew what was happening in the first place. Guilt started spreading inside him, his chest tightening and his breathing speeding up in anxiety.

And that’s when he started thinking about the alleged master key that would end up being his fatal flaw.

That same night the doctors allowed you to go back home and told you to be careful and to take care of yourself. Chan had helped you, letting you use him for extra support on your way up to your apartment.

You melted on the sofa once you arrived, but you felt it in the tension that kept buzzing around you and your restless lover. You hesitated for a moment, but you could notice something was bugging him.

“Chan?”

He stopped in his tracks, but weirdly, he never turned to face you.

“…Is everything ok?”

You saw his posture tensing, turning to something bewilderingly defensive.

“No. Nothing is.” He breathed slowly, his insides trembling, his heart screaming in his head, telling him to stop talking.

You pouted, confused. “What are you-?”

“Can’t you see it?” His tone was aggressive.

Shut up.

“This isn’t going to work.” His posture was uneasy, he still didn’t- couldn’t look at you.

Shut up.

“Whatever we had isn’t worth this shit.”

God, Christopher, shut the fuck up.

Your lips trembled. ‘Whatever we had’? Shit. You felt sore, and you still smelled the coffee that girl had thrown at you. No. It wasn’t possible.

“I don’t believe you.”

Chan’s chest ached.

“Well, this is what’s happening. Believe it or not.” He turned restless again, still not daring to look at you, picking up the few things he had left in your apartment the past months. His hands trembled, his facade struggling to remain believable.

“Chan, wait.”

He quivered.

“Let’s talk about this. What’s wrong?”

“Everything is!”

“There’s no reason for us to end.”

He scoffed, his throat almost hurting.

“You’re clearly blind.”

“Did I do something wrong? We were fine yesterday. We’re ok, we-”

His hand gripped the doorknob as if it was going to wake him up from this nightmare. But this was real life, and he had to do it. For you.

Because that made sense.

What a fucking idiot.

“We’re far from ok.”

“Chan, please-“

“Nothing you can say will make me stay.” He said almost in a whisper, afraid that his voice would crack if he spoke too loudly.

Despite the advice you had received from the doctors, you lightly skipped your way to him, placing a hand on his forearm, your lips close to his ears. His breath hitched, and even if it was because that small contact was breaking him to pieces, you weren’t going to know anytime soon.

He had to leave now. Before the regret turned stronger.

“Chan.” You swallowed hard, your heart shattering to pieces. “If I can’t make you stay… just know I won’t leave. You know where I’ll be.” You stared at your hand as you slowly let go of him. You wanted to hug him, beg him to stay so bad. You wished to wake up from this nightmare soon.

Instead, you did what you thought was right.

“You have the choice, angel. Just… don’t be too late.”

God, he regretted every single part of it.

[☆ ☆ ✧ ☆ ☆]

“Chan, what the fuck.”

Felix felt that sort of anger you could only achieve when being an empath. The ability to feel and comprehend his mate’s feelings allowed him to feel twice the anger when he wouldn’t just choose what was right from what was slightly easier.

“Hey, we said no judgement.” He sniffed, half of his face buried below the neck of your sweater.

It smelled like you.

Felix wanted to hit him. In the face. With a brick. Instead, he contented himself with one of Chris’ pillows.

“You.” hit “are.” hit “so.” hit “stupid!”

“Well, that shit ain’t new.” He mumbled, snatching the pillow away and laying on it.

“You are unbearable.” Lix hissed, much like a kitten would. “Go back to her once and for all, for fuck’s sake. I’m sure she’s been waiting for you all day.”

“I can’t.”

“That’s bullshit.”

“I’m not ready to fight it.”

“I don’t think you have a chance, at this point.”

“It’s whatever, Lix.”

“SHE- Ugh.” The rage the blonde was feeling felt surreal, his hands aggressively pulling his hair. “She came here to give you an ultimatum, Chan! You absolute buffoon, she’ll think you don’t love her!”

“That’s not-!”

“Then why are you not leaving?!”

“Maybe that’s what’s best for her?!”

“Oh, so now it’s about her?!”

“IT’S ALWAYS BEEN!”

“SO LET HER CHOOSE!”

Silence filled up the room.

“Let her choose if she wants you or not.”

“And let her end up injured again?”

Felix took a deep breath, trying to calm down —and failing—.

“We both know that those kinds of accidents are not that likely to happen.”

“But it did-“

“Shut up.” Felix’s stare could kill any living being within a 3-meter radius. “The 3-year dating ban is over. You can talk to the fans and to JYP about this shit.”

“Still-“

“Nuh-uh. You can make it work, this ain’t some Romeo and Juliet impossible love bullshit or whatever the fuck you’re thinking.” Felix got closer to Chan, his stance still confrontational.

“Never, ever use the ‘I’m doing it for her’ excuse again. Life isn’t some fucked up song where you let go people because you love them, Chris.”

Before he stormed out of the elder’s room, he threw clean clothes at him.

“Get your shit together, go get her, and I’ll think about making more brownies for you, you absolute fucking dummy.”

[☆ ☆ ✧ ☆ ☆]

The door in front of him looked exactly the same as how he had left it. The bell sounded the same.

But you, you looked different.

Maybe it was because he felt so touch-starved that you kept glowing around him. You looked ethereal, so much that he was scared to touch you, scared that he’d wake up in his bed again.

“Does this mean you’re keeping it?”

He stared down. He was still wearing your sweater.

You smiled slightly. “It looks better on you anyways.”

He entered your apartment, and you stood behind him.

“Is there anything you’d like to say before?”

He turned around at you, your heart racing.

“Before what?”

“Before I choose to do something else instead of talking things first,” you mentioned, your gaze moving from his eyes and his lips.

He gulped, seeing you getting closer and closer.

“I…”

You took his arms and settled them on your waist, locking yours behind his neck.

“If we’re going to argue, we’re going to do it like this,” you said in a whisper. The light smell of his cologne surrounded you faster than you expected, and you loved it.

His eyes grew big in surprise. Quickly, his hands tightened his grip on your waist, moving them to your face in a sudden action.

“You’re… here.”

The weak tone he used made your insides churn.

“Chan…”

“Mmhm?”

Your hands travelled to his chest, slightly creating distance.

“Please stop before I kiss you,” you whispered. “If I do, I don’t think I could-“

He gave you a small peck, interrupting you. He giggled softly as your expression turned into a surprised one.

He hid his face in the crook of your neck, his breath tickling you.

“You look so pretty right now.”

You gasped, hearing his laugh.

“Don’t change the subject, mister!”

You both stood there, hugging each other, feeling like the nightmare was finally over. But Chan still had something to do.

“You don’t deserve what I put you through.”

Your hands caressed his back.

“That’s the excuse?”

“In my defence…”

“I’m listening.”

Chan dived even deeper in the crook of your neck, feeling content just by being in your arms.

“I forgot the excuse. I’m just sorry. I can’t even say it without feeling like a dick. I know it doesn’t make up for what I said or did. I couldn’t even look at you that day because I just wanted to stay with you, but I felt so bad. I love you so much I can’t stand it. I thought that maybe if I left… maybe I could save you.” His embrace tightened.

God, he missed you so much.

“I wasn't sure how much longer I could have taken this..." he said in a huff.

“I know I couldn’t, and your stupid ass wouldn’t do anything about it.”

He took your face in between his hands, his eyes red.

“I told you there was no reason for us to end, dipshit.” You whispered, laughing as you kept on crying, your hands travelling up to his. “We’ll make it work.”

He stroked your hair with one hand, sighing.

“I’m so happy you’re here.”

You couldn’t help but let out a smile, giving him another peck.

“…of course I’m here, idiot. I never left.”

~Kats, who you’ll most likely never see reading angst bc she’s a weak loser, yet here she is, stopping mid-writing cause she couldn’t see past her tears 🕳️👩‍🦯

ps: i wanted to mention @writer-in-the-dark-prompts bc i used some prompts from them and i think it’s a really cool blog!

[whore4billie]

GO AWAY - M.S

Summary- Y/N and Matt have been fwb for around 3 months now. Except the friends part isnt really there. Its more of just fuck buddies honestly. He was fucking multiple girls and there was no feelings involved with anyone..... but y/n had stupidly caught feelings for Matt. She knows she should hate him she knows she should get rid of him, block him on everything and move away from Boston so he cant find her, but she can't. She keeps going back.

Warning(s)- swearing, breaking down, mentions of sex, nothing else I dont think.

Not proofread as usual LMFAO

its around 10pm and all i could think about is Matt. I cant get him out of my stupid head. This isnt what friends with benefits entails. And i know he doesnt feel the same. Its been about 2 hours since i texted him and he saw it almost an hour ago. I text him again.

to: Matty❤🖕

Busy wit your side hoes? Tell Khloe or Missy or Julia or Tiff or whoever your balls deep inside I said hi dickhead 🙄🖕

From: Matty❤🖕

You need to chill out, you act like we are actually together or something but the main thing is were not together. We never will be. We're friends with benefits were fuck buddies whatever you wanna call it but we. Are. Not. Together. Got it? So why the fuck do you care if i sleep with someone else so much?

Fucking ouch. I felt a sting in my chest there was no need to be so harsh. I hold back my tears as i type my reply.

To: Matty ❤🖕

I dont care but i just dont want your other hoes STDS thank you very much

No Matt im lying I do care because im in love with you. I care about you sleeping with other people because I want you for myself. And it hurts so fucking bad seeing you flirting with other girls and hearing about the other girls youve slept with. But i cant tell you that.

I check to see if he's replied. Read- 2 minutes. Why am i suprised. I need to get him out my life. He's messing with me he knows exactly what hes doing. I go to his contact and press block. Done. So why am i still thinking about him. Maybe if i put music on it'll distract me. I press shuffle on my playlist and go away by Tate Mcrae came on. Oh for fucks sake.

"Everytime you look at me it's never enough for you it cant be fair to me cuz boy you know im so damn in love with you"

The universe is against me.

"Oh I've been stuck seeing your face in everyone shouldn't have played in your game of fun now i dont think im okay you never go away"

"Oh enjoy the show you seem to love when im alone you like to care until you don't now i dont think im okay you never go away"

Really? I cant escape Matt. Everything reminds me of him. Ok maybe I just need sleep.

-Matts pov-

Matts going out tonight with a girl from bumble. He found her on there and shes the only one hes actually liked on there. He texts Y/N

To: y/n

Youre a freak. You act like we are actually together we're just fwb remember. Get that into your thick ass skull im not interested

[Text isnt available to send click here to try again]

To: y/n

You blocked me? The fuck?

She blocked me? The fuck? What the fuck is her issue. Fuck this I'm cancelling that date and im going to Y/ns.

It's about 3am when i get to Y/n's house and I text her to open the door.

[Text isnt available to send click here to try again]

Oh for fuck sake im still blocked. I start knocking on her front door and notice her bedroom window is open. "I know youre home open this damn door" i shout up to her. She's being so childish why is she even mad?

-Y/n's pov-

I wake up to banging at my front door and check the time: 3:26am. Who would be here at 3am for fuck sake. I look out my bedroom window and see Matt banging on my front door. "Matt fuck off its 3am I dont wanna speak to you" i shout from my bedroom window. "Why are you being like this? Open the damn door and talk to me like an adult I didnt do anything wrong here you're getting unnecessarily mad about this" Matt yells back. The nerve of this bitch. "I'm not unnecessarily mad Matt I have every right to be mad. Your fucking with my head and you know damn well what your doing Matthew so don't act like you dont" I shout in a whisper, my voice breaking. "Why because you're stupid ass caught feelings? Why the hell is it my fault you cant keep your emotions in check? Thats not my problem." Matt yells. Well ouch. What the fuck is wrong with him? Who does he think he is? "Matt im not doing this with you" i shut my bedroom window and slide to the ground in sobs. What. the. fuck.

_________________________________________

So this is pt1 lmk what you think gimme brutally honest opinions on this idc if theyre rude be brutaly honest

@recklesssturniolo @caroline12b @chrisfavoritepepsi @mattscokewhore @sturnioloshacker @freshloveforthefit @carolsturns1 @carolinalikesthings @mangoposts @sturniozo @luvmxtt @mattestrella @lacysturniolo

[lawlietkitty]

Kazuichi Soda x reader 🔧

”Nightmares”

The nighttime announcement has already went off hours ago, but I still can't seem to get any sleep.

I glance outside my window, looking at the night sky. The moon is shining bright as always. Staring up at the stars always seems to calm my mind.

My thoughts start to calm down, and I feel as if I'm finally ready to fall asleep. But my piece was suddenly disrupted by someone knocking on my door.

-shit, who could it be? It's like 3 in the morning. Why the hell would someone knock at my door at 3 in the morning?? What if they're here to kill me??! Ok I need to calm down.- I think to myself, taking a deep breath. Why am I so paranoid?

I hear the knocks again, but this time, followed by a familiar voice:

-Y/N? Are you up? Can I pleaseee come in??

Oh. It's just kazuichi. But he sounds kinda worried, almost scared, it seems.

I quickly get up and rush to the door. When I open it, I see the pink haired boy with a rather sleepy face, as if he had just woke up.

-Are you okay? Did something happen, Kaz?

Before even answering my questions, he walks inside my cottage and sits in my bed.

-Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I just had a nightmare that's all.

I-... is he serious? Did he come here in the middle of the night because of some... nightmares??

-Gosh, are you kidding me?? You scared the shit out of me! I thought someone tried to murder you or something!

-WHAT, why would you think that?!

-Well, I never expected you to come here at 3am because of some stupid nightmares! Seriously, Kaz, how old are you?

-HEY, they weren't just some stupid nightmares, ok?? They were... about my dad... - his voice got a lot quieter when saying that last part. Fuck. I shouldn't have said that. Kazuichi has some serious issues regarding his father, but he's never talked about it directly. He always acts as if what his father did to him is something normal, which shows how used he is to being abused. For him to say it in such a sad voice ... it must have been a fucked up nightmare. I feel bad for him.

-Oh, I'm... sorry, I didn't know that's what it was about. Sorry I didn't mean that. - I say, now sitting next to him.

-No, it's ok. I know you were just joking.- he says, looking away, avoiding looking me in the face. It looks like he regrets saying that, or maybe he's just embarrassed.

The atmosphere is starting to get heavy, which is something unusual when I'm around kazuichi.

-Do you wanna talk about it, maybe? I'm not the best at advice but I'm a great listener!- I forced a smile, sitting down next to him.

-No, don't worry. The more I think about it the more it makes me feel worse.

-Are you sure, Kaz?- I rest my hand on his shoulder, and he turned his head to face me.- You know you can always talk to me, right? I understand what you went through.

-I just... want to distract myself right now, if that's ok... But... thank you for being so kind, Y/N. - he gives me a sweet smile, and I can see a slight spark in his eyes. That, right there, is my weakness.

I pull him in for a hug. At first he doesn't react, but he then gives in, hugging me back, wrapping his arms around my body. We stay like that for only a few seconds, but those few seconds felt like they lasted an eternity. I wish they did.

Kazuichi is not only my best friend here, on the island, but he's also the one person I come to when I need anything. If I need help, advice, someone to hangout with, someone to chat with, eat with, laugh with. It's him. I may see him as more than just my best friend, but he doesn't know that, and will most likely never know. What if he thinks it's weird and doesn't want to be my friend anymore? What if he laughs at me and makes fun of me? So many things could go wrong, and trust me, I've thought about every single one of them. I just can't risk losing someone so important to me.

He pulls away from the hug, stares at me for a couple seconds, and then looks at the floor, trying to hide the flustered look on his face.

He's so adorable. His little side smile, his rosed cheeks that match the color of his eyes, the way he plays with his own fingers when he's nervous. I love everything about him.

-Y/N?

He called for me, taking me of my trance.

- Is it ok if I sleep here for the night? I just... really don't want to be alone right now.

-Oh, of course, don't worry about it.

-Really? If you want to, I can actually sleep on the floor, I just don't want to make you uncomfortable.

-Oh, no no! It's ok, don't worry. Here, - I pat one of the pillows - you can stay on this side of the bed.

He takes off his shoes and hat, and starts pulling down the blankets so he can lay next to me.

-Hum... are you gonna sleep with your jumpsuit?

-Huh? Oh, I usually take it off to sleep but, again, I really don't want to make you uncomfortable or something, you know. I don't want you to think I'm some kind of creep.

- But that's gotta be really uncomfortable to sleep in. You can take it off if you want to. It doesn't bother me.

-Huh? Are you sure?? Well, I guess I can keep my shirt on.

He takes off his bright yellow jumpsuit, wearing only a white tank top and black underwear now.

He lays next to me, and we both just stare at the ceiling in silence. But that comfortable kind of silence, you know?

-Hey, Y/N... what would you do if... you really wanted to say something to someone, but if you did, it could either destroy your relationship with them, or something really amazing could happen. But the person is really special to you and you don't wanna risk losing them.

Hm, how interesting. Sounds a lot like one of my problems.

-Ok, just tell me, who's the lucky girl?

-WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

-COME ON, I'm not stupid, you know! Just tell me who it is.

-I'm not telling you, ur gonna laugh at me. - he said making a pouty face, that I find simply adorable.

-im not gonna laugh at you, Kaz!

-Promise?

-Promise.

And with a straight face, he stares at me, deep in my eyes and takes a deep breath. Before I could even gather my thoughts, I feel his lips pressing against mine. My face starts burning up. I instinctively pull away. What was this just now? Did Kazuichi just...

-Oh my god I'm so so sorry! God I'm so fucking stupid. I- I'll just leave. - he said, shaking his hands around, nervously.

But before he got the chance to stand up, I pull him down again and put my arms around him in a hug.

-uh- y/n... what are you doing?

-I'm not letting you leave. You said you wanted to spend the night here so that's what we're doing.

- But- what I just did- you dont...?

-I like you, Kaz. You can kiss me as often as you want, from now on.

His face immediately brightens up, now forming his usual smirk.

-oh? It's that so? So I guess it would be ok if I just did this? - he starts kissing me repeatedly around my face. We both laugh, while still hugging

The silence once again returns, but this time, it's feels comfortable. We both just stay there, in each other's arms, enjoying the silence, eventually falling asleep.

So that was it! :D I hope it wasn't too bad for a first try. Apologies for any English mistakes, I tried my very best ^^ as always I'm open to criticism, so please don't be afraid to give me advice!! Tysmm byee ^_^

[noa-de-cajou]

Day 8 : Sharing / Wearing each other’s clothes / Sleeping in / Temptation / The Drowning

Faloi belongs to @corneille-but-not-the-author (might be a tiny little ooc but I had too much fun with the dialogue)

______

If you asked Faloi Frosilaen, he would say sharing a bed with Ether Nepheli is certainly an experience.

If you asked Ether Nepheli, she would not be this polite and say sharing a bed with that idiot can be a fucking challenge, and not in terms of fucking.

The annoying part came in when they started to sleep together randomly. Ether would fall asleep in his bed while reading and wake up in his arms, Faloi would collapse at 10 and wake up at 3am to her curled up next to him. No other activities involved. They talked, said they shouldn’t make a habit out of it, and proceeded to make a habit out of it. Like they always did.

That soon made some… issues more visible. And Ether and Faloi being Ether and Faloi, they'd talk about it in the most random of moments in the most random of ways.

“Ether, you should sleep in more clothes than just your underwear."

“... Huh?”

They were both sitting in his office, reviewing papers, and he just blurted that out. Ether blinked, then smirked.

“Why? Don’t like the view?”

“You know that's not what I mean.”

“Yeah. The thing is, I have no fucking idea where you're going with this. Care to elaborate?”

“Well, aren’t you cold at night?”

“Not… particularly?”

“Then why do you keep stealing all the covers?”

Silence. Ether blinked again, slowly. She could have argued that this wasn't the time to talk about this. But of course, she didn't.

“... Faloi. Your bed is huge. You’d need truly amazing hogging skills to steal all the covers.”

“You never cease to amaze me, then.”

“I- Why does it matter? You sleep fully clothed most of the time!”

“Just because I'm not cold does not mean I do not get sick.”

“Bullshit. I never saw you get sick, even in the middle of winter. What, are you too old, do your joints get fucked up by the cold?”

That earned her a sideways glance, maybe an irritated twitch of the eyebrow, but Faloi’s face remained almost as calm as usual. He didn’t reply, so Ether kept going.

“That’s very like you, hiring a thief then getting all petty because she’s stealing the sheets.”

“I am not being petty, I am merely stating facts.”

“Yeah, well you should be more worried about the fact that one of your Commissaries is stealing from the treasury. Because that's what we were talking about before you decided to bring up bed matters, remember?”

That was enough to make them both focus on work, until Faloi had to leave for a meeting. It lasted way longer than it should have, and the sky was already dark when he came back to his quarters. Where he was welcomed by Ether, sprawled out on the bed, reading, and wearing…

Faloi squinted.

“Ether? Is that my shirt?”

“Good evening to you too, Faloi. And I don’t know what you're talking about. You have glasses, use them.”

“Judging by your approximative obfuscation and blatant sarcasm, that is most definitely my shirt.”

“Look at you, answering your own question. I’m so proud of you.”

Faloi sighed and took off his coat. Too tired to be annoyed, and very aware that this is what happens when you let someone like Ether into your bedroom.

“Very funny. I don't really mind, either way, but what is this for?”

Ether shrugged, and closed her book with a satisfied thump.

“Well you did say that I should wear more clothes at night. So I picked up the first item I found on the floor.”

Right. They didn't tidy up the room after last night. Again, he should have expected this. 

“Who’s petty now?”

“I’m not petty, I'm just following your advice.”

She smirked at him as she took the pins out of her hair to let it down. Pins she probably stole from his bathroom as well.

“If you don't like it, you’re free to get it off me.”

Turns out he didn’t need to get it off her. At all.

Let's just say the both of them slept well that night… For a few hours, at least.

Around four in the morning, Faloi sat up, and he barely had the time to put his shirt on before a hand grabbed him by the sleeve.

It was usual for him to wake up around four in the morning, get dressed and start working.

It was a bit less common that Ether woke up exactly at the same time. 

He glanced back at her. She looked half-asleep still, but he did notice an unusually fast heart rate. A nightmare, maybe. 

“Faloi, it's way too early,” she mumbled.

“I need to get to work,” was his only reply.

“You got most of it done yesterday, I know it…”

“I still have unfinished business. Go back to sleep.”

“I’ll go back to sleep if you come back to bed.”

“Do you think blackmailing me into sleep will work?”

“Do you think I'm going to let you go to a meeting on two hours of sleep?”

Faloi squinted at Ether.

Ether squinted at Faloi.

Are we arguing? Is this an argument?

“Ether, if you try to get me to stay every day, you’re going to ruin your sleep schedule.”

“I’m sleeping in your bed, it's basically our sleep schedule at this point…”

She was interrupted by her own yawn and Faloi sighed deeply.

“You’re exhausted. You should really go back to sleep.”

“That's rich coming from the President of Exhaustion himself.”

He gave her a stern look.

“You’re not going to let go, are you?”

Ether gave the look right back.

“Well, I can't make you stay. But I think if you really wanted to go work, you’d have left already. I’m not that strong.”

“... Or maybe I just have enough delicacy to talk this out with you instead of pushing you away.”

“Well, if you’d have the delicacy to come back to bed, I’d be delighted,” Ether replied with enough sarcasm to fill a lake. “Weren’t you the one worried about me being cold?”

His exhaustion was plastered all over his face. He wasn’t even fed up with her. He rarely was.

Ether had to repress a small triumphant smile. He was tempted to just give in, she could see it, because he was not good at hiding it.

This isn’t an argument.

This is a game, and I'm winning.

But he wasn’t fully convinced just yet. Always that sense of duty, something she both loved and hated about him because of how often it was driven by guilt instead of actual duty. If she wanted him to actually rest, she might have to ease his worries first.

“Okay, how about this. Two more hours. Two more hours and at six I'll wake up with you to help with your work so you won’t be late on anything. How does that sound?”

Faloi lowered his gaze, something he always did when he was debating with himself. She waited patiently for him to finish, tried to not tighten her grip around his sleeve.

I can't make you stay. I can't make you take care of yourself. I can't make you do anything. But if it's true that I'm one of the few people you listen to, then please stay.

“That… seems like a fair compromise,” Faloi finally sighed. “I have a condition, however.”

Score.

“Do tell?”

He gave her a tired smile. Well, it was more of a little rise in the corner of his lips.

“Leave me some of the covers?”

She blinked, and chuckled with something like relief.

“Sure. I'll do my best.”

He slithered back into the bed, looking a bit hesitant still. Ether smiled silently at him. 

She knew that this was a rare occurence. She just wished she didn’t have to fight for Faloi to realize he couldn't go on like this for long.

Maybe he knew that.

Their hands were not even an inch apart when they fell back asleep.

If you asked Faloi Frosilaen what they were, he wouldn’t be able to answer. Colleagues? Friends? Lovers? None of those words seemed good enough then, they don't seem any better now.

If you asked Ether Nepheli what they were, she’d say she loved him. That she still does. That it was suffocating then. That it still is now. That they were both nothing and everything.

But the fact remains that as he was dying, that when she thought she would die, they thought about each other.

If you asked them both if they regretted it, their answer would be the same.

No. Never.

[a-little-scamp]

update from the doghouse

i can't say that sleeping at work in a new low for me, because it has happened enough that no one is shocked to see me here at 3am. so. not sure what that says about my life, but i can say it says that i'm doing better than i was doing this time last year. so i'm taking the win!

i think she's ignoring me. in my defense, i do not think that the terrorist attack should be my fault. in her defense, she did tell me not to go to the terrorist attack. in my defense, i thought i was going to get stabbed not blown up. so like. its loss loss, okay. none of us are winning, i am sleeping at my job, she is probably also sleeping at her job.

this. is fine. i get why she's mad at me. i do. i just wish she'd text me back. i hate when she avoids me because it just means i dont know what the fuck i did wrong. because if she leaves it to me to figure out what the fuck i did wrong im going to go crazy

like i'll be here all night. i can make list after list of shit i should have done starting with "listen to my girlfriend" and ending with "not getting caught in a terrorist attack you dumb piece of shit." like fcuking hell i know i couldn't have seen this coming, but what if i could have? what it i could have done something different and none of this would have happened?

yeah yeah yeah i can't control the world or the future or jackshit which is becoming glaringly apparent. i just hope we're okay. i know she's probably scared. im scared too.

i... i dont think im as scared as i should be though. like fuck, what does it say about me that i gave myself like five stitches in my work breakroom and i'm just... i'm fine. my co-workers weren't shocked because this wasn't even the first time i've done this shit. like fuck, of course she's scared. i'd be scared of me too.

fuck. no. bad thought. i should go to bed. i know she doesn't think im. i know she's not scared of me. she's scared for me cause i'm a stupid shit who almost dies every other week. but like.

its fine guys, dont worry about it. i'm sure i'll wkae up tomorrow and she'll have called me adn we'll say i love you and it will be okay again

[dailyautophagy]

I have off tomorrowwwwwwwsa

we all do probably but

it doesn’t feel like Saturday to me

I’m a big fan of that lol

I don’t have a ramble in me but imma force one out because

This Tom papa special is pretty good but i don’t wanna give my undivided attention to it

He is making jokes about food influencing your behavior and mood and I know he makes his own bread cause I listen to him on podcasts lol and he is just good at his job and doesn’t preach to people he just does good jokes that might make people think twice before eating a bag of cool ranch Doritos because a while after you want to kill yourself a lil

I think I typed that 5 hours ago and then i came back to this to ramble more and then tumblr did a crash and it didn’t save the rambles after this ramble (sad, because decent lol)

there are four married men at my work that go out of their way to be nice to me and like not other people and just

why

i mean know why (and no I ain’t gonna touch it) but like why do they think that’s okay lol are they just being nice out of pity

I know it is not ideal to be aware of motivation existing for every and all things but like it does and therefore no these people are not just being nice to be nice there is a reason

There’s always a reason for everything even if it’s not a good one or

Like I don’t know the reason we evolved brains that are painfully aware of our imminent death but I know there IS ONE lol

I know a lot of the reasons for things now, health issue things, sadnesses and such

Don’t pretend being depressed is just part of life and it won’t be / I think therefore I am / if you say you can you will & if you say you can’t you’re right /

You get it

I am tired

I want to cum

I need to drink water

We’re all the same really lol

The thing about ants not tryna leave the boundaries when someone draws circles around them and then showing all the BORDERS OF COUNTRIES like I get it lol but we need them at this point because without them the places that suck will trickle into the places that are nice - if we had started with no borders everyone would be the same maybe lol or dead

I know nothing John snow don’t fucking listen to me

You can actually :/ i do know a lot of things and it’s not like hidden secret knowledge it’s just not ever addressed lol because guess what’s easier? Popping pills

I don’t like that about the world

It card to find someone without a prescription lol even I smoke weed ffs that kinda counts plant or not

The only person raw dawging life is ….no one.

Find me someone not drinking caffeine and not prescribed anything. I thought did but he sneaks cans of Coca Cola and has prescriptions now (cause he didn’t take care of his damn body)

AND NOW IT IS 3AM

It’s three am I must be lonelyyyy

No it’s actually 411 according the the fucking alarm clock this asshole downstairs is sleeping through lol it’s set for 405 so even I didn’t hear it for a whole 6 minutes .. but I’m not IN THAT ROOM LIKE HE IS. Idk how people sleep through loud noises like that lol DRUGS?!?

I mean dude makes almost 1000 a week and I take 300 because life is expensive and this isn’t a goddamn homeless shelter but he’s somehow always poor lol which like how - I’m buying the groceries

Which I forgot I said if I had to pay for them I wasn’t going to be also preparing all his meals like you want a slave you gotta stock my shit lol

But last night he was napping (last night aka like 5pm yesterday) so I went in the kitchen WHERE I BELONG to make dinner and put dishes away and I made rice (which just requires patience like you gotta wash the rice and then let it boil - I do a cup of rice almost 2 TBSP of oil and 1/2 tsp salt and 1.75 C water and I hate American measurements lol I think that was one way they tried to fuck up our ability to use food as medicine. Cause back in the Florence nightingale time (and location) they had recipes we prolly never even heard of. Remedies and recipes

I get so mad now when people don’t understand that our own body is responsible for our own healing and you just gotta it the right conditions lol like definitely SET broken bones and definitely antibiotics have saved lives but MOST things most illnesses and even most diseases are within our realm of fixing. You don’t need doctors. We didn’t evolve from cavemen because doctors existed. I’d venture to argue that doctors now do more harm than good. Granted we are not taught the things or given the tools to know how to fix ourselves lol but like the truth is out there man lol

Seriously though I wish I found Barbara O’Neill when I was in school. I graduated highschool in 2008 and dropped out of college after people started dying from pills and getting their drugs laced with fentanyl lol but alas my career didn’t require it.. despite everyone else I work with having a college degree.. So LOL at them.

I’d be in legitimate debt instead of just bad at money

Also I swear to fucking god these assholes are going to make me take my days off around Christmas so I don’t get all the OT again lol

Trust me, your omnipotent creator doesn’t get offended by words, and since I’m not a believer like that I’m not actually using the lords name in vain or whatever the fuck …. Wait yes I am because I am using it in an empty or meaningless way … I always thought it meant thinking like “this is gods fault” and being so disappointed by god you then curse him

I don’t know

Spiritual, yes. Religious, no. Religion is responsible for all the wars. And those imaginary lines we decided were worth killing people over. I mean now it’s too late the lines are necessary because some countries are shit holes and some are not but maybe if we had never segregated ourselves we wouldn’t be so different from eachother but TOO LATE what’s done is done and now I don’t want people imported from other hemispheres and TBH neither do their gut biomes you’re supposed to eat the food indigenous to your area lol that’s why I can fuck with everything apples forever like I wasn’t raised on milk I was raised on apple cider lol AND IVE NEVER BROKEN A BONE I’ve really fucked up my elbows and tailbone but nothing to my knowledge ever broke perhaps teeny tiny fractures and for sure bruises but never casts never snaps 🤞 I hope I hope I hope the universe never makes me / I never do anything to warrant that karma lol my brain is the mob btw if I disrespect the order of the world instant karma and thus far it (my karma) has been eerily accurate

If I’m mean or do a rude thing, something bad happens to me lol usually nothing too serious but low key (so low key I would never actually say this to humans esp my sister) but I think my XL abortion is why I don’t have parents - which I know is like not how cancer works lol I know they grew that shit over so many years and it was a direct result of their lifestyle / dietary choices - but yet I still feel that(low key) if I had had that baby they would not be dead.

And that’s a weird way to feel.

But I don’t think there’s anything after this lol because I think energy gets recycled but not SOULS or whatever makes us have a spark of electricity in every cell. Salt water I guess lol shits crazy

There’s so many layers to health and once you realize the building blocks matter

Like do people not liken it to gas grades and cars

Put premium in your body it is worth it and ultimately over time regular will fuck up the engine

Our body our cells our mf dna is made up of what we eat lol well it’s actually nucleotides but NUTRITION AFFECTS HOW WE MAKE NUCLEOTIDES and therefore our dna BUT we cannot change our chromosomes and we cannot fully detox from an mRNA vaccine lol

I should go back to sleep lol

I want to brag about famous people living near me and being on my ro…can’t even say that lol as I don’t wanna dox myself or career

If you know my job don’t fucking tell people please lol they don’t need to know

Suffice it to say that I only own a home because my parents are dead and not because my career is a real money maker lol but

See can’t even brag about the benefits without basically doxing

Doxing is a such a faggot word lol

And concept tbh like mind your business troll

I hope every human responsible for the squirrel euthanized in NEW YORK okay caps gets mugged Or assaulted Or like some not death but like a physically painful thing happen to them because what the fuck is wrong with you lol you did this because you were “concerned”? Well now it’s dead, are you happy? Nothing to be “concerned” about. Fucking disgusting. And obviously voting for Kamala so like

The type of people who are voting blue blindly are the type of people who can’t mind their own business and need the tv to tell them what to believe

Also imagine setting a ballot box on fire and genuinely believing you’re on the right side of history

You don’t have to like trump personally but you do have to respect the fact that millions of us do and we literally elected him to be a presidential candidate despite the television programming everyone to hate him - we don’t watch news lol maybe someone watch fox but like I do think most of us don’t even have cable anymore like

Now tis 6am and I am still not back asleep lol but it’s not dark anymore so I might have to stay awake

I love my nails and I’m so grateful for the glass files the pretty blonde one told me about (I mean I think I knew they existed but I didn’t use them lol) and my nails like so useful so strong so GOOD FOR PICKING MY FACE which is BAD lol I can’t not pick my face I hate this for me

Like I’m probably better off touching my phone cause then I’m not picking my face lol but being perpetually on tumblr feels like not a good thing but also it is the best way to not spend money lol not shopping online OR FIND US IN THE APP or whatever something about capital letters in advertising always made me feel like a robot was yelling at me

Rumble is the best way to watch Barbara I always just listened on SoundCloud whilst at work but the viewing of her and the white board is a much different experience lol not hugely better but a little better

Seinfeld and laying with bobo

Bison steaks!!! I forgot they are amazing and ground bison burgers are kind of not lol so just be aware

I think they’re less fucked with than cows but it’s possible that’s just wishful thinking

End ramble heavy eye shallow breaths maybe i will see you inn the dream world WHO WHO WHO WHO what are you an owl lol sometimes i want to say things just

To be able to make a joke after

And sometimes

I can’t stop wanting

To fix my teeth they are not okay on the bottom like I’m gorgeous my smile is gorgeous but if I talk you can see the bottom teeth are not good and i want it fixed i want it fixed i bought the things to fix them one time and then i did not do it i just used the ugh no doxing me it was like I didn’t truly feel I paid for the jawns?? I assume that’s why i had the gall to waste almost 2k like that

They are useless at this point like my teeth didn’t just go back to how they were before that would be too convenient they’re a new type of screwy now

Whatever I don’t know why I’d use the same people imma prolly try… not byte lol cause I already did byte

But I don’t want one I gotta go to dentist for ever like if I was willing to sit in those chairs and breath those gross airs every month 🤷‍♀️

Okay lay down sleepy lol

[little-mouse-gardens]

Incorrect quotes with my rottmnt ocs and the turtles

Ocs : sunny, Marcy, Skye and Angie

part 2 electric boogaloo

Donnie : What if the 'g' in 'gif' is silent?

Marcy, sleeping over at the lair for the night and is cuddled up half awake next to him : Donnie, I’m begging you. Please get some sleep

Donnie : What gif I don't want to?

Marcy : Fuck You

Mikey: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers?

Angie : pink mums, why?

Mikey:

Angie : Were you going to get me flowers?

Mikey:

Angie :

Mikey: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

*it’s the Middle of winter and the turtles are in brumation*

Angie, who came over to cheer him up : Mikey, time for breakfast! Want some pancakes?

Mikey clinging onto Angie like a koala : no

Angie : Mikey, it’s time for lunch! I made some Homemade pizza and breadsticks!

Mikey huddled up under electric blankets trying to tug Angie in for cuddles : nooo

Angie : Mikey, it’s ten at night time for bed-

Mikey, wide awake and instantly dragging Angie into the blanket pile for snuggles and a movie marathon : NOOOO-

Meat-sweats after the turtles defeat him once again while Angie and her sisters witness it, looking right at Mikey : may your marinara sauce never cling to your pasta!

Mikey and Angie who both love cooking nearly trying to claw his face off : EXCUSE YOU!?!? COME UP HERE AND SAY THAT TO OUR FACES MOTHERFU-

Mikey : Angie the kitchen is on fire!

Angie who is half asleep, still has her sleep mask on and it’s almost 3am after a cooking show marathon she and him watched : babe, like…how big is the fucking fire?

Mikey : big

Angie, crawling out of bed : alright-

Leonardo : My hands are cold.

Skye : Here, let me hold them.

Leonardo : My lips are cold too.

Skye : *covers Leonardos mouth with her hand*

Raphael , throwing their head into Sunny's lap: Tell me I'm pretty!

Sunny, lovingly petting his head : Prince Charming from shrek could never compare

Raphael , sweating: Sunny, there’s something I need to ask you-

Sunny: Finally! You’re proposing!

Raphael : How’d you know?

Sunny: Raphael , you’ve dropped the ring five times during dinner.

Sunny: I even picked it up once.

Raphael : Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake.

Sunny: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear.

Raphael : ...

Raphael : You mean ring bearER, right?

Sunny: ...

Raphael : Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

Side note - sunny loves this big sweetheart with all her heart. Likes to give raph shell scritches because she knows it helps his anxiety, doesn’t even mind the happy stink he emits.

Marcy: *seductively takes off glasses*

Marcy: Wow...

Donnie : *blushes* Haha... what?

Marcy: You're really fucking blurry.

Marcy: I owe you one.

Donnie : That’s ok. You can just date me and we’ll call it even.

Donnie : Valentine’s day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and pos-

Marcy: I wrote you a poem.

Donnie , already crying: You did?

Donnie : My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized.

Marcy: *accidentally drops her new beta fish and proceeds to drop to their knees and sob while apologizing profusely*

Donnie : That one. I want that one.

Side note - Marcy loves fish, so her accidentally injuring or killing one literally is her worst nightmare, but not to worry! she and Donnie had a arcade date and some comfort snacks to cheer her up (plus he stole a new beta fish for her)

Marcy: Thank you for not saying "I told you so."

Donnie : When you’re as right as I am, you don’t have to say it.

Marcy: Did you have to stab them?

Donnie: You weren’t there. You didn’t hear what they said to me.

Marcy: What did they say?

Donnie: "What are you going to do, stab me?"

Marcy: That’s fair.

Skye : You are an absolute fucking dork.

Leonardo, singing: Yeah, but I'm your dork!

Skye : *smooches him on the forehead* Yeah, you're my dork.

Leonardo: *is throwing stones at Skye’s window*

Skye : You have a phone for a reason, Leonardo!

*THUD*

Skye : DID YOU JUST THROW YOUR PHONE AT MY WINDOW?!

Leonardo: You’re giving me a sticker?

Skye : Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying “me-wow!”

Leonardo: I’m not a preschooler.

Skye : Fine, I’ll take it back-

Leonardo: I earned this, back off!

Skye : My toxic trait is that I truly believe I could win a fight against anybody if I was mad enough. You might have the strength and size, but I have the pure, unfiltered rage.

Leonardo: The universe is cold and unfeeling. The only constant is chaos.

Skye : Was that place out of chocolate-chip pancakes again?

Spoiler alert - she came back with the pancakes an hour later, skateboarded halfway across New York and back to get them for him

Skye : I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.

Leonardo: But, Mi amor, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.

Skye : wait….Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns??

Leonardo: Is it working?

Leonardo: I'm sorry. Please talk to me.

Skye :

Leonardo: Hello? World's most amazing person?? Sweet pea? Mi amor? Precious cinnamon roll that's too good for this world, too pure?

Skye : 'Sorry' doesn't bring back my fucking M&M’s

[mara-brekker]

Ice cream at 3am

Words: 704

Pairing: alex turner x reader, Y/N

a/n: Y/N = Your Name, Y/BF/N= Your best friends name

Requests

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.・。.・゜✭・.・✫

i hate my job I should probably blame my mother for it, since it was her fault that I worked here. I never wanted to work in this bakery, but my mother wanted me to finally go to work even though I had more than enough to do with school. The only good thing about this job was that my best friend works here too. Every time Alexander Turner, a handsome boy from my school and a good friend of my brother's, came to the bakery to get something for his mother, he avoided me. He always ordered from my best friend and never from me. I guess he thinks I don't even notice him. "Alex 1:0 Y/N" laughed my friend when he left.

"Haha" I just answered. "He avoids me. Every time he's with Matt I try to talk to him but he avoids me!” I almost yelled. "He likes you, even a blind man can see that Y/N." She clarified.

-

"You should have seen her smiling at him and he didn't even look at her." Both of my friends laughed.

"Stop it," I said, groaning.

"You guys would be so cute together! I hope I’m invited to your wedding!" screamed one of my friends. I just rolled my eyes.

-

Matt, my brother, invited his friends over to our house today so they could rehearse for their band in our garage. I had only heard a few songs but I thought they were really talented.

“Matt take care of your little sister. Don't torch the house and no house party. You're in charge here while we're gone.” my mother said as she got dressed to go away with my dad. Matt nodded and disappeared into the kitchen.

"Y/N you're secretly in charge. Make sure your brother doesn't fuck anything up.” she whispered to me. After they left, I went to my room to read.

-

"Y/N we ordered pizza!!" I ran down the stairs to the kitchen to get my pizza. As I passed the living room, I saw Matt's friends and said hello to them. Of course, Alexander was also sitting there on the couch.

"I'll take my pizza upstairs, have fun you guys!" I called to Matt.

But when I came back down and threw away my pizza box, they were gone. And my chance to talk to Alexander was gone.

-

I definitely don't have a sleep rhythm anymore. When I looked at my alarm clock by my bed it was 2:38.

"Shit" I just mumbled. I went down to the kitchen to look for something to eat. When I didn't find anything in the fridge I was about to look in the freezer but was interrupted.

"Can't you sleep either?" asked a voice behind me. "Shit Alexander! You scared me.” I looked at him. "What are you still doing here?"

"Matt said your parents aren't there and offered us to sleep here," he replied.

"What are you looking for?" he asked me. "I want ice cream" I said and took out the strawberry ice cream. When I wanted to take a spoon I asked him: "Do you want one too?" He looked at me perplexed and then nodded hastily. I took the ice cream, the spoons and went to our garden to sit on the bench. Although it was night, it was quite warm. "I hate summer nights. It's just so warm," I said to myself. Alexander laughed and sat down next to me. I gave him his spoon and started eating the ice cream.

"Do you actually know how long I've been trying to talk to you alone?" I asked him.

"You wanted to talk to me? Why?"

“You are handsome Alexander. Why wouldn't I want to talk to you?"

"Alex... call me Alex." he said. "I am good looking?"

I think I blushed for the first time in my life. Alex next to me just laughed.

"Would you like to do something with me during the daytime?" he asked me.

"Gladly" I smiled at him. "You have no idea how Y/BF/N will freak out if I tell her about this. She's been planning our wedding since I was 12.” I laughed.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.・。.・゜✭・.・✫

Thanks for reading <3

[certifiedbitch777]

New Year, New Me?

Entry Date: 2/2/2024

I am currently 23 years old. The age I always hear carries the most tribulations for our early 20s, which has pretty much been my pain point as I have no idea what I'm doing in life.

Shocking, I know, right?

Before I got my current corporate job, I had so much passion. I want to try out everything in life. I wanted to be a writer, dancer, singer, actor, psychologist - Shit, I even tried to do IT because why the fuck not? I had so much energy and drive I felt like I could conquer the world. And yet, here I am now, and I have no passion, interest, or drive. I'm literally just floating in life right now, not knowing what the fuck to do next.

I'm in survival mode, to be honest. The only thing that is hardwired into my brain is the goal of getting this shmoney.

Despite all this, I still feel lazy since I have no ambition for anything outside of money. My mind is plagued by what I should and shouldn't do and all I can land on is 'I don't fucking know :|'. 

Regardless of this unclarity and lack of ambition, I only want a clear sense of direction. I want to get going already, but I don't know what steps to take. Again, I understand I'm only 23 years old, but still. I need that clarity to take action on a path I know I will be satisfied with, but once again IDFK.

There's no way around this phase at this point; It's inevitable. The only thing I guess I can implement is going on a deep assessment of my life (once again) and reviewing what is and isn't working for me. I've just been avoiding doing this because it is tiring and tedious.

Fuck, maybe I'm just being lazy.

I mean, tbh, it isn't fun; It just sounds like a load of work.

Damn, I think I'm lazy...

I mean, they say it takes 30 to 60 days to break a habit. I'll start looking into my bad habits and see what I can get out of that. 

Here's a list of my current shitty habits that I'll be challenging:

Sleeping before or at midnight: My sleep schedule is terrible for a variety of reasons, but I want to start sleeping before midnight to practice better sleeping habits. For reference, I typically stay up until 3am despite working in the morning.

Waking up before 8am: Okay, so this is mainly to be able to study for my permit (Yes, I'm 23 and don't know how to drive. Who's gonna check me??) and work out. This will also allow me downtime after work (5pm).

Consistent Oral Hygiene: Okay, before y'all supposedly clean freaks call me gross, I'm not saying I don't brush my teeth. I do, and twice a day at that, along with using my Therabreath mouthwash. I just need to be consistent with flossing, specifically at night. I've been getting better at it, but I want to implement it into my daily routine.

Taking Daily Medications: I suck at consistently taking my mood stabilizers, as it just makes me feel dreary and sleepy throughout the day. Since I stopped taking it consistently, my mood hasn't been the best. Needless to say, I'm not gonna do that anymore.

Working Out: I've been athletic for as long as I can remember. However, in recent years, I've been on and off and want to get back to having a snatched waist with a phat dumpy. I'm already comfortable with my current size, but to be back in shape wouldn't hurt. I think I'll be sharing my journey with pictures every so often so that you guys can have a realistic peek into my journey.

Eating Habits: I need to eat healthier, PERIOD. I don't have the worst eating, but it's terrible for me because I'm very impulsive with food and suffer from an eating disorder. I have toggled between binging and starving myself many times in the past, so I want to try to find that sweet spot where I can eat healthily and not feel deprived to the point where I binge.

Prioritize Health: Both physical and mental. I suck at this and, at times, can let work take a toll on my everything. Last year almost broke me, and I don't want this year to be the same. I need to be happy and healthy. No comprising at all.

So yeah, that's my list. Once again, I'm just going to point out I am a lazy girl and I have terrible habits, however, I do want to make a change because I'm really tired of this loop.

I want to reach all of my financial, personal, and career goals this year so badly. The good thing is I have some steps to outline what I need to change. The challenge is pushing through to get the end result :\

Anyway, I will most likely post my initial progress for my journey for working out and do bi-weekly check-ins to track my progress.

This may sound corny, but New Year, New Me?

[rosmerie-sleeps]

Incorrect Quotes!! (For omega strikers!)

Rune: Zentaro, can you help me? All my clothes keep disappearing for some reason. Zentaro, wearing a hoodie that’s seven times his size: spooky

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Estelle:I’m not being weird. Am I being weird? Luna: yes and that’s coming from me

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Asher: when Ramsus gets Daiquiris he gets into how beautiful he is. Ramsus: hey I dare you guys to dare us to make out Luna: Hey Ramsus, you do know that’s a mirror, right?

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Luna: school sucks Atlas: I know, but you have to do it so you can get a job Luna: what are jobs like? Atlas: they suck

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Estelle: GET BACK HERE YOU DUMB FUCK! Kai: LET ME RUN FROM THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS!!!

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X: can we go to a haunted house? Era: what’s wrong with the one we live in? X: Wh-what? Era: Goodnight, X.

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Juno is hugging Luna Asher: Hey! It's my turn to hug Luna! Asher: grabs Luna Atlas: kicking down the door What do you mean, "yOuR tUrN"? We agreed now is my time slot! Juno: No, It's still my turn! Luna: suffocating Guys, I love you, but just because I'm the smallest doesn't mean you can be hugging me constantly! Asher: But we need the moral support! Juno: And you're small! Which is cute! Atlas: If I don't hug you right now I think the depression will kick in and my body will stop functioning. Luna: close to tears Well- I, I guess.

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Ai.Mi: jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that Zentaro: Oh, you’ve been there? Ai.Mi: Once. In monopoly

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Kai, texting: X, will you please go to sleep? X, texting back: What makes you think you didn’t just wake me up? Kai, yelling: I CAN HEAR YOU CLAPPING TO THE FRIENDS THEME EVERY TWENTY MINUTES SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP! Kai, texting: Just a hunch :) You goin’ to sleep soon? X, texting: I’m trying Kai, yelling again: TRY HARDER I HAVE A 5:45 AM MEETING TOMORROW BITCH Kai, texting: Okay, don’t stay up too late or you’ll be cranky :)

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Atlas: Last night I found out Dubu is a sleep talker. Drek’ar: Oh, really? Atlas: “Dubu!(The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell)." Right. In. My. Ear. At 3am.

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Estelle: I have met a lot of pricks in my time, but you, Kai, are a whole fucking cactus.

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Dubu, to Drek’ar: Dubu?(When was the last time you let someone hug you?) Drek’ar: thinking Drek’ar: 2012. X: 2012…? Drek’ar: Yeah. I almost died and it really freaked Atlas out so I let him hug me.

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Zentaro: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and killed it. Zentaro: And I started thinking. Zentaro: Like, it was just trying to get food. Zentaro: What if I went to the fridge and it just slammed the door shut and snapped my neck? Ai.Mi : Are you ok?

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Kai: I need to dye my hair. Juno: … Kai: Or get another tattoo. Juno: … Kai: Or a new piercing. Juno: Why? Kai: To, you know, appease the mental breakdown gods.