#it'll get worse before it gets better. or something
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"I think they did right after Eggman was beat and he lost his control over the entire world, though I think it was rushed for the most part. I didn't really have time since I was busy blowing up any standing bases, though if I were to guess he might've ran unopposed if no one really heard about it. It would make sense too. I wouldn't be surprised if not many wanted be President with how much work there was to do to get things back in order." The entire planet was a mess from when Eggman has complete control of the world.
"That is a sound theory, and if he has strong ties to G.U.N then I'm sure they wouldn't have had second thoughts about 'convincing' anyone attempted to run against Thawne not to do so." Blaze would turn her focus on the Chaotix. "Perhaps you time might be better looking into this Thawne. I still hold hope that he didn't have any involvement and is intentions are genuine with his concerns."
"Maybe we could simply ask him some questions? I mean, it can't hurt, and he shouldn't have any reason to lie to us. I know this is me being optimistic, though I just hope I'll see the best in people." Belle wasn't really using reasoning rather than feelings with what she just said, though sometimes being kind and direct got answers. Throwing out the idea doesn't hurt anyone either.
"That's... foolish thinking." Kitsunami seemed to want to say something else, though he bite his tongue and softened his words. The fennec actually liked Belle's company so didn't want to be mean to her. "Though it's not like it'll do any harm. The worse that could happen is he deflects or simply refuses to answer. If you want to ask then ask, though I personally think its a waste of time."
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"Sounds like you'll miss me being a pain in your ass, which is just weird. Though I guess no one on this team is normal." Surge wasn't good at this, mainly because she simply expected them to shut her out and leave her to face the music solo style. Now they were saying they'll miss her and how she caused problems? Ugh, why does being a good guy have to be so weird.
"...Just take it easy Lanolin. I know you gotta deal with Tangle being Tangle, though you seriously need to relax more. Plans are fine, though if you wanna deal with Eggman you gotta learn to role with the punches and change on a dime. I know it's sucks to be put in a position like that when you gotta lead, though I think it's important." Why was Surge trying to give advice in a situation like this?
"I could dash you where you want to go before heading to the command center. I know a lot of people get stomach sick, though I've got more control now, weirdly enough." Surge actually had a moment to process just how stable her powers were. Made her wonder how tied her emotions were to her powers. Well, not like she'll have time to explore that.
That village, they condemned her the moment they found out who tinker was. It was also ground Zero for the Zombot virus. Of all the people they were hit the hardest. They of course put that blame on poor Belle. Miles couldn't help but feel like it was a sore spot for her, and hoped deep down that she was right. They'd have to contact him, get papers and confirm it all. But he knew it was just as likely even the mayor would turn on her. He'd be there to help her through it regardless--- chaos he hoped she was right.
Miles flipped through his phone as he looked for information on this president. A Name, a birthdate anything he could use to give him a clue about who he was.
" Here we go, President Thawne... first name Luthian... 28 years old, served in GUN from the time he was 18, fought with GUN in the War-- yea right more like cowered in a hole. Not much else here... just lots of photos of him with Abe. Guess they knew each other... still young for a president... did they even do an election i wonder? "
He flipped through the photos and checked his social media but until he could hack in and check things. He could only tell so much.
" Likes his guns, gives to charities, helps out at the local homeless shelter... guy is squeaky clean... like to clean, this feels--- Staged? no angry posts, no joking posts... nothing from before the war... Dunno if this will help us, and its very sus..."
The chameleon didn't seem phased by her decision, and frankly if she knew someone to counter that ability good. But he guessed they'd get involved before it was over. Plus they knew the lay of the land well enough. No point in arguing right now, they'd have time to discuss it later.
" As you wish princess, we'll be here if you need us. "
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She chuckled at Surge being upset that she wasn't angry, that it might be easier if she was. If anyone was angry it was Sonic, pissed that she wouldn't fight for her freedom. But that wasn't to say Lanolin wasn't feeling emotions. She was, but they were a jumble of sadness and feeling like she failed Surge on some level. She hugged herself and looked down at her feet, just for a moment that stern façade she wore faded away.
" Anger would be easy... i wish i could be angry at you. Yelling would have been so much easier. But i just feel... i'm going to miss you Surge. Even your little outbursts, and raiding the fridge at all hours of the night. Our little arguments about how to handle missions... i'll miss it... "
She said in a softer tone less the commander and more like a friend, even if they had there problems. She saw Surge as more then just a weapon, more then just some soldier.
" But i guess i'm being sappy, and sentimental--- Yes Report to the command center. Get Miles to get your testimony and get it all on tape concerning that day. I have one more stop to make, and then i'll be back at the command center. "
She took a deep breath and let her personal feelings go. She held a hand out to Surge as if to shake her hand.
" It was a pleasure working with you Surge... I hope we one day in the future we can do so again..."
#atangledfate#Rowan the Lemur#dangerous fighting uncle#Blaze the Cat#burning sol guardian#Belle the Tinkerer#gentle puppet tinkerer#Kitsunami the Fennec#nervous shaking water#Surge the Tenrec#speed of lightning brawler#rp#ic#oc#IDW Sonic
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the mortifying ordeal of having to decide if you're unwell enough about a new fandom yet that you should add it to the tagging list/intro post, or if there might still be hope for you.... knowing that the fact you're considering it means it's most likely already too late..... knowing it's so SO far past 'most likely' because there are already three (3) plots pinned in the discord server.............. SIGH
#mona rambles#i do not need this. i do not have the TIME#also i do not want to touch that fandom everything i know about it looks SO exhausting god bless#anyway.#stranger things post will be tagged ST once i. convince myself that it is in fact way too late for me#send condolences. or something#i literally would've been FINE if not for atlanta#which. i knew this before we always make each other worse#but i was a clown. committing hubris. thinking that this time.. this time I'd be FINE#as if the fucking. bbc merlin MESS that my life has become the last 4 years isn't one huge blinking warning sign#i say all this. while having consumed roughly 400k words worth of fic the last three days#as if there is hope. as if i wasn't having a blast#and i haven't even started on the fucked up ship fun yet#we're still in wholesome steddie land; i don't even want to KNOW what harringrove will do to me#ANYWAY#ignore me#block ST if you want to be spared#it'll get worse before it gets better. or something
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Eusine rides on the gentle beat of butterfly wings. He does not foresee the storm.
>>> Next <<< Previous (Destiny Bond; a Pokémon fancomic --- pt.1, pt.2, pt.3, pt.4, pt.5, pt.6, pt.7, pt.8, pt.9, pt.10, pt.11, ???)
#/slaps eusine: “this baby could fit so many family headcanons in him”#I made myself sad while writing this I think that says something /lh /cryingn#happy to announce that it'll get worse before it gets better 👍#I am also aware of how terribly inconsistent my artstyle is throughout these updates im yelling#if I gaslight myself hard enough then I can see it as improvement . skdjfsndfs#I am inconsistent but I am free#gym leader morty#eusine#mystery man eusine#morty/eusine#sacredshipping#pokemon#pokemon hgss#pokémon heartgold/soulsilver#heartgold soulsilver#pokemon gsc#pokemon fanart#pokemon art#pokemon comic#pokemon fancomic#fanart#art#fluff draws !!!#Destiny Bond comic
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i hate the come-down period after doing literally anything fun at all at any point in time. i went to a movie theater on friday and then to a convention on the following weekend, which was incredibly fun! i loved it! but there's always a come-down period, where everything feels awful because i know im going to be stuck in my house again, rotting away like always, unable to do anything outside of these walls for who knows how long. its hard to keep doing things i enjoy if i know that im just going to feel awful afterwards.
#i wanna be able to do things#but my sister is too picky and my mom is too tired and my friend needs to be involved in everything we do so we just. never do anything.#i do so much stuff alone because nobody wants to go or i dont trust anyone to actually follow through#my bike is out of order though and my mom seems to hate the idea of me using the bus system that i literally get to use for free#now. why can't i just do things inside my own home? it doesn't fuckin work out#the only place im really welcome in my own home is my bedroom. the bottom floor is for my friend and the rest of the family.#i dont have space to do much art up here and there isn't enough space for my other hobbies and i can't make too much noise because it'll -#- bother everyone and i cant call friends because everyone will listen in on my conversations and i don't have enough space to bring my -#- laptop and all its additions up to my desk#i have friends but i feel so isolated from them all. i feel like im going to completely fuck things up by trying to talk to any of them.#i always feel better when i can get out and do stuff but im rarely able to get out and do stuff and even then i feel bad once the stuff ends#so im trapped i guess. its a cycle that will never end. ill do something i love to cheer myself up only to feel even worse afterwards than -#- i did before.
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Adam did his best to hold a conversation with Abel, but hearing his voice broke him. He sounded so happy and carefree, having not gone through the trauma of what his Abel went through.
His son could have had the life he deserved, only if he was better for Lucifer. If he was worth it. If he was more like Lilith.
Adam felt his face warm, and his eyes started to water. He couldn't bear to look at Charlie. He could feel her eyes on him. Lucifer was starting at him to, while having to carry the whole conversation with Abel.
He wanted to run so badly that he needed a moment alone. But he couldn't. He was even finding himself wanting to spend time with this Charlie, the daughter he could only fantasize about.
But he couldn't.
As soon as he and Lucifer said their goodbyes, he excused himself.
Wondering the long halls, he felt every one of his shields he meticulously put up start to crack. Each family painting, each photo he walked past, made the dam closer to breaking down.
He came to another staircase when he noticed there was a dark space underneath it, out of view of the rest of the hallway.
He tucked himself away and covered his mouth as he squeezed his eyes shut. Tears flowed down his cheeks. Adam felt like he couldn't breathe. He knew he was nothing to Heaven. He lost everything he cared about the garden, closing himself off to everyone. Even his children.
They deserved better, Heaven deserves better. He knows why Lucifer didn't choose him. Why would he when there was someone better? There was always someone better.
He felt so pathetic. He couldn't even play house, right. He couldn't keep his end of the deal. Now Lucifer would most likely get his Adam back and through him to the wolves.
But Adam deserved it. He deserved everything that had happened to him. He deserved whatever suffering would come for him. But at least whatever this Lucifer had I store for him would be better than the Catacombs.
Adam almost vomited thinking about that place, but he held his mouth shut and tensed his throat up. Refusing to let that happen
Could he handle it? Probably not. He's been planning on turning his axe on himself, but like usual, he's a coward. Too scared of the pain.
He couldn't tell what would be worse; another 10,000 years of being a disappointment, a failure, a mockery of what Heaven envisioned for the first man. Or his angelic axe being buried I his chest.
Adam started to shake, and far-off footsteps echoed through the hallway. He was fucking pathetic.
-
Adam wished to could block out the screaming and begging. He wasn't even sure if the helmet he was wearing was muffling the noise at all.
But it all seemed to be getting louder, like it was invading his mind.
Adam tugged on the chains. There was no way they were budging.
The fuck was this place? And why did Heaven have access to it? Why did it even exist? Was this Hell?
His kingdom wasn't like this. This was a literal Hellscape in all sense of the word, in all sense of the concept.
He jumped, and his head darted around. He swore he saw something moving against the skulls and bones. But this place could be playing tricks on him.
Adam: F-Fuck- what the fuck?
He was stuck here, for who knows how long. Maybe days or months. But then, they were made to live for eons. Maybe they'll never come for him, and if Lucifer manages to bring him home, it'll be the other Adam's problem.
But that thought made him feel horrible. Forcing this worlds Adam, who had done nothing wrong, to suffer here. Thought from the sounds of it, this Adam had been here before.
Adam couldn't help but pray to Lucifer, hoping he'll figure out how to bring him home. The screams were so loud and so familiar, but he couldn't pinpoint them. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to.
Adam: F-Find me, baby. I don't think- I can handle this...
Body Swap AU w/ Queen of Hell Adam getting teleported to the canon timeline (magic mishap) just as Adam is about to meet with Charlie about her hotel 👀
Adam:
Eugh, what happened...?
Lute:
You fell asleep, sir. I assume it was because you ate too many ribs.
Adam:
Lute? (Why was Lilith's top girl by his side? His face felt stuffy and his breathing was a bit heaved... was he wearing a mask of some sort? Something felt off, and he was gonna get to the bottom of it.)
Lute:
Yes, sir?
Adam:
Why are we here again?
Lute:
We're about to meet the Princess of Hell, Charlotte Morningstar, sir. Lucifer couldn't make it, so he had his daughter substitute for him.
(They were gonna meet his daughter? And why couldn't Lucifer come?)
Lute:
... Speaking of the devil's daughter...
Charlie came in, holding her little paper drawings:
Hello, hello! I'm sorry for being a little late!
Charlie...? That was Charlie? No, that can't be, Charlie looked nothing like Adam remembered, she didn't just look like her father, but also like him! and why does she look so much like... her?
Charlie:
Mr. Adam, uh, first man, Adam? Are you okay?
Poor Adam must be so confused 😫
Adam stared at Charlie. Did she just call him by his first name? Why wasn't he in Hell? Why would Lucifer want to meet him? And why is Lucifer making Charlie do the work he doesn't want to do?!
That man's getting an ass kicking when Adam gets home! But, that'll have to wait until he figures out what's happening.
Adam: ...uh- Lute?
Lute: Yes, sir?
Adam: Who am I?
Charlie screwed her nose up. He really was as egotistical as her mother and father said he was.
But really, Adam was genuinely curious.
Lute: Uh... you're the first man, leader of the Exorcistsm army-.
Adam: The what?! Since when?!
Lute: ...Since... like... five thousand years ago.
Adam couldn't believe this shit. The fuck was happening?!
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"it's easier to leave an abusive situation than it is to stop an abuser" :^( but it's not easy :^(
#repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns#im not unsafe btw just. :^) scared :^)#tired.#starting to stop walking on eggshells kind of. in a cowardly way. like responding some of my real thoughts but at 4am#i want to scream. im not like that but i want to yell and tell her to leave me alone forever and i just want to be able to rest !#and to not be afraid. i want to move. i want to drop off the face of the earth. i want to go to bed. i want to stay awake and on guard.#idk. im tired. im so tired and i want it to stop. it's not even a big deal.#the thinly veiled insults bother me more than anything else. insult sandwich on compliment bread.#im so pretty im so stupid im so funny. im smart im too insecure im beautiful. im the most interesting person she knows im evil im talented#it's not even the worst thing it just pisses me off so much. do you think this is helpful to say? do you think this is normal?#do you think you'll get what you want insulting and belittling me as long as you tell me you think im attractive?#it's always how pretty i am. like some superficial bullshit is going to make up for an insult or make the insult disappear#and everyone else gets to leave but if i leave she'll die and it'll be all my fault and this is just like x y or z#and didnt i know she almost experienced trauma as a child but didnt? and how that effects her?#fuck. i hope she sees this tbh. how fucking insulting to see something someone's experienced and say that couldve maybe happened to me#but the person who couldve done it lives in another country and never came here.#what the fuck. what the fuck.#so it didnt happen to you? you cant lay claim to it at all? yet you think you understand me or that even if it did happen it's all the same#im going to lose my mind. im so. fucking. over it. but im a coward and i dont want her to die so ill grin and bear it.#and she'll tear out all my skin and ask if it's a little too much and ill say it's fine and she'll say im so gorgeous but i'm disgusting#but at least im kind. and ill say okay. because if i say anything else it's a threat on her fucking life.#tbh im only posting this now bc i know no one will likely read it. perpetual coward when it comes to this shit#because if i tell someone the full extent they'll ask why i didn't leave sooner. but i did!#i left and i got bombarded and overwhelmed and i was so tired of being scared of running into her everywhere#and i just. eased back in. and said it would be less this time. and it is so much more. it is so much worse.#ive lived in that fear before and i was so tired of it. it was a big reason i moved so far for college. and i cant just run away#so this seemed better. but it's so much worse. id rather hide every day of my life. keep an eye out everywhere and run away.#it wasnt so bad really. it was tedious and nauseating and i only ever explained it to one person. but it wasnt impossible.#this is much closer to impossible. this is soul crushing every day. and the things she does arent even as bad i dont think#it just doesnt stop. at least in high school i eventually got it to stop. i just had to be avoidant. this. wont stop.
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im the weirdest type of sick rn btw
#i have SOMETHING my throat hurts and my lymph nodes are swollen but i feel fine?? guess i'll just be grateful#i think it'll get worse before it gets better tho so maybe i'll be miserable in a few days
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Shower thought:
Corporations and and billionaires in America wouldn't be facing the backlashes from labor right now, if the trump administration had just stopped covid.
Previous presidencies (with the exception of Reagan/AIDS) were able to halt the spread of pandemic level diseases, either behind the scenes, or at least before they blew up the news feeds.
If COVID had been just a blip in the normal american news cycle, life would probably continued to be “business as usual”; people just going to their jobs, raising their kids, living their lives... overwork, cost of living struggles, were just part of the daily background noise of our lives that we accepted.
Lockdown gave the rest of us pause, to think, to recognize harsh truths, to ponder the possibilities;
People who worked at home realized that it was possible to remain productive, as well as have a more balanced, fulfilling life.
Labor that was deemed essential, learned that corporate/management would do the absolute minimum possible, if not less, to ensure the safety of it's workers and customers, all in the name of maximizing profit.
Having gotten a taste of the possibilities, and learning the truth, of minimal effort from management, as well as financial inequality between the capitalists and workers, we collectively realized that we didn't want to go back to “normal”, because normal isn't working anymore.
All it took us to arrive here, was the incompetence of one narcissistic president.
#dont get me started#id rather be here than “normal”#hopefully something good will come of this#but I fear it'll get worse before it gets better#but I sincerely hope that we leave something better for our children
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Shades Of Cool
NEGLECTFUL!PLATONIC!YAN!batfam x GN!reader - part l, part ll
synopsis : growing up with a shit mom and constant step-dads and mom's boyfriends, your view on life has grown pretty bleak. you just want to die, since it doesn't seem to get better than this. things can't get any worse, can they?
so reader is very flawed ppl. i’m trying to make this as gn as possible for pls bear with me. asks and requests r open. reblogs are also much appreciated. now that i’ve gotten my e-begging out of the way, enjoy this pathetic excuse of a story
warnings : child abuse, past sexual abuse, yandere, etc
you want to die.
you always do.
staring at the wanna be thug pointing a gun at you, you sigh and roll your eyes in exasperation. perhaps pissing him off will the best way to get him to curl a finger around the trigger. or judging by his temperament, you won't have to do much.
"you? i should give my money to you?"
"who the fuck do you think you are, bitch?" the thug screams at you angrily. his grip gets tighter and clammier. he's not experienced with this. he's probably ganged up with a bunch of thugs to pull shit like this. it wouldn't take much to disarm him. "give me the fucking money before i blow your head off!"
"to a junkie like you?" you are a junkie, too, so you're not too sure about making fun of him for that. "i don't give money to hobos."
that is wrong, too. but you want to piss him off.
"that's it, you stupid bitch!" the thug's stances becomes defensive. his hateful glare is pointed at you while he musters the courage to actually press the trigger. he doesn't look like he'll do it. you've seen countless like him roaming the streets, holding you at gunpoint. he probably won't do it. then again, this is gotham. you don't expect much. either he'll shoot you dead, forcibly take your stuff, flee the scene out of fear, or be dismantled by one of the city's vigilantes. perhaps he'd shoo—
"stop right there!"
damn it.
you think too soon.
a young robin is quick to have the wanna be thug tied up and beat down. you would've questioned why a kid who seemingly looked twelve can do such a thing, but you've learned to not question most things in your life. you merely sigh in disappoint and pick up your dropped backpack before beginning the journey to hell.
"excuse me? wait! where are you headed?"
gosh, his boy-ish voice grates your nerves. makes you clench your teeth. your gaze narrows, but you know better than to react. reaction gains a reaction—one that will never be in your favor. it'll lead to a fight—one that will never be in your favor. you'll end up broken, bleeding, and bruised. now that isn't something in your favor. now you're thinking of favor too much. forcing a smile, you turn around to face the pre-teen vigilante. "yes?"
"are you alright?" he asks with practiced concern. he doesn't actually care. it's probably just protocol.
"a-okay!" the words are hollow. they lack depth. like you. "thank you for your help. i don't know what would've happened to me if you weren't there."
you do know. you wish you wouldn't.
"you're welcome," robin replies with polished words like he's not exactly convinced. "would you like for me to walk you? the city hasn't been safe for some time now."
"when is it ever safe? but that's okay. i live just around the corner, so i think i'll be fine."
"are you sure—"
"completely."
please. why won't he just leave you alone? there goes your plan spoiled by him again. every time you've been in an attempted robbing, he's been there to destroy your chances of getting shot. of escaping. he always does this. this is a repeated cycle between the two of you. he's a flying bird until you shoot him down. your name clearly wants to escape from his lips, but robin nods his head in understanding.
"this seems to happen to you all the time. my wish is for you to be safe."
"this is gotham." the grip on the straps on your backpack tighten. "everyone's gotta go through this. anyways, i gotta go, you know. thanks for savin' me."
"of course."
you don't spare him a single glance. the sky is wrapped up in black clouds heavy with the burden of rain. icy cold wind sings a melancholy tune through the stiff air. the door to your apartment looks like the gates of hell. it's all futile. no matter how many sighs you sigh, how many wishes you wish, and how many curses you curse, you'll still land up in the same fate. without escape.
that is the summary of your life.
taking a few seconds to prepare yourself for the incoming session, you open the door to be met with radio silence. silence is never good. half the time, it means something is brewing for you, and they're taking their sweet time to scare you into thinking nothing will happen. sometimes. not all the time. the other time, it just means he need to rise from his pile of misery first.
the hand of your mother's boyfriend is instantly wrapped around your neck before you can even register why the hell the apartment looks like a tornado hit it. he squeezes so tightly you feel like blood is gushing out of your ears with how loudly they ring. white spots dot along your blurry sight as you struggle to breathe. you can hear a frantic voice telling him to let you go, but you're pushed up more against the wall. this is the norm. doesn't mean it hurts any less. he'll let you go, give you some time to regain your breath, and then rain down bullets upon you.
that's exactly what happens.
your hand goes straight to your neck as your raspy and shaky coughs wreck your chest. he squeezes hard enough for it to hurt but it not show. and then the kicks and punches come. with how much your chest and ribs are struck, you're a bit surprised at how you haven't broken a bone yet. your potential step-father screams at you, but you can barely hear it over the repetition of words in your head. he grabs your bloody face and shout something incoherent before letting you go to kick you.
leaving you in your own pile of misery.
it's normal. yes, it's completely normal. you're used to this. it'll get better. it always does. but you've got the crushing idea it never will.
gotham heights high school—the school you're forced to attend.
the class division is insane to look at, because it's there even from a short and near prospective. how the richest kids got put in a school with the poorest—you'll never know. the only thing you do know is that every one of these kids are pieces of shit. even the ones that pretend to be nice.
tim drake—or shall you say tim wayne—is no different.
even as he helps up the girl who just got roughly pushed to the floor, causing all her textbooks to scatter, you can only eye him with disdain. if he really cares, then he would've beat the shit out of those athletes. but he doesn't. they're all the same—privileged and all. sympathy shouldn't be given to them. not to drake or the wealthy yet somehow bullied girl.
"but y'know what i heard?" your friend drags your attention back to him. zarian leans against a locker lazily, but excitement practically buzzes off of him. "the bruce wayne is coming to our track meet today!"
your other friend, jaylene, rolls her eyes as she applies her eyeliner using the mirror hanging up on the inside door of her locker. she speaks exactly what you're thinking. "only because his beloved son is gonna be there."
"well, still. think about the connections we can make! all the famous people that'll be there."
"keep dreaming. asshat. i put all my money on the attention being on rich the kid. i don't even know why he joined track. varsity, at that, too. there has to be some sort of bribery going on."
an incoming argument is clearly brewing up, so you take in a deep breath to say something, but a new voice beats you to it.
"excuse me?"
you and your two friends turn to face the guy standing in front of you. charismatic, intelligent, and optimistic—he's an enigma that shines on everyone. tim drake. his black, messy yet somehow in place hair does no justice for his good looks. he's the complete package. rich, good looking, tall, and empathetic. the mere sight of him annoys you.
zarian is the first to speak up. he quirks a brow and offers tim a grin. "what's up, man?"
"you're leaning against my locker." tim rubs the back of his neck. he smiles awkwardly in the presence of the three of you, and it takes your friend a beat to understand what he's saying before moving away.
"oh yeah. my fault," he says as he moved to stand next to you.
the school's very own bruce wayne only shakes his head and tells him it's okay while opening his locker and grabbing a few things. people flock around, waiting for him to be done with whatever the hell he's doing, so they can be back to his side like leeches sucking on blood. he surely can't be this dumb, no? these people don't want to be his friend...
well, it's not as if it's your problem. you wish it is. you and your friends turn to make way to first period, but drake clearly has other plans. he sandwiches himself between you and zarian with a grin of his own plastered on an unblemished face. one carefree of any worry or pain. "so," tim begins. "first track meet of the year, huh? aren't you guys nervous?"
jaylene merely hums in amusement and shrugs. "it gets better. when you've spent four years in track—in front of all those judging people—it wears off. hopefully, you'll get used to it soon."
that is jab, though, rich the kid doesn't seem to catch on. he laughs casually, but even you can sense the anxiety like it was radioactive. ""i hope so. i've sprinted so much i feel like i'll get shin splits again."
you zone out while he has a conversation with your friends. as if drake has ever had experience with track. it took you all of freshman year to just prove that you can actually be a part of the track team, and here tim drake is, parading around about getting on varsity without a single grain of hard work. he's a naturally talented person. good at everything. that's what makes you hate him so much. people like him get everything handed to them just because they're good at it first hand and leave behind people that actually work for it. you want to tell him to buzz off—that he can't talk about how much he's practiced and how nervous he is, but you keep your mouth shut. that is, until he directly addresses you.
tim's eyes narrow at you with comedic suspicion. "you know, you look like someone i know. a lot. the resemblance is crazy."
"eight billion people out there. you never know." your tone is flat, stoic, lacking any bit of emotion.
"gosh, you even sound like him! that's really terrifying."
"well, whoever, it is, i hope i never meet him," you murmur.
your two friends leave for their classes soon, and you and drake find your seats at the back of high school economics. exhaustingly so, you sit together in one of the many desk pairs, and drake uses this opportunity to annoy you any chance he gets. you give off the vibe that you don't want to talk to him. he doesn't get the hint. you don't tell him, though. maybe that's the problems. his shit-eating grin ticks you off when you look in his direction. "what?"
"let's be friends!"
"no."
"what? come on! don't be so cold!" he whines like a petulant child being told no.
"no."
"too bad! you're my friend now."
"tim," you sigh. it's wrong to scream. it's bad to scream. screaming leads to fights. fights lead to you laying in a pool of your own blood. laying in blood leads to missing practice. missing practice leads to less skill. less skill leads to less of a chance of getting the hell out of here. just smile. forgive and forget. know your persona. know who you are. kind. happy. funny. "fine." so you smile with gritted teeth. you smile like you played a cruel joke on him. "we can be friends... i guess."
his face brightens at your fake words like he is just given the the world.
tim drake wiggles his eyebrows playfully and nudges you with his elbow. "you know, i've been trying to get you to say that since school started?"
"really now?"
"really. i'm glad we're going to be friends. oh! should we go out to eat with zarian and jaylene after the meet?"
... there's a chance your mom's boyfriend will get pissed off. he'll probably beat the shit out of you since the track meet would have happened, and you wouldn't need to have an unblemished body for meets. he'd scream, yell, and punch... like his life depended on it... fuck it.
"yeah," you reply shortly after with a firm nod of your head. "we can go to this diner near the theater. i'm sure you'll love the food."
this doesn't mean you hate him any less. he's still rich scum⏤how you're poor scum. he's stuck up, pretentious, and sickeningly sweet. exactly what you hate. you just hope you can have a good time after the track meet. the mischievous glint in his eyes told you otherwise.
"and this is my dad, bruce wayne."
what the hell are you doing?
the sun is setting along the horizon, the air is getting cooler again, and you want to sink into the floor. the plan was to head straight to the diner after this, but rich the kid somehow roped you into meeting his dad?
nausea pools in your stomach from both hunger and the feeling of thousands of eyes staring at you. cameras are flashing at gotham's billionaire as he smiles and firmly shakes your hand. confidence drips off of him disgustingly. his high-tailored suit radiates wealth and money. his stoic demeanor gives off an aura of mystery. you want to lay on a railroad track with an incoming train speeding along the way.
"it's nice to meet you. tim has ranted about his track teammates quite a lot."
there's an eleven year old standing next to him. his eyes are on you like that of an owl's but you neither glance at him or bother to acknowledge him. you just want to eat some food before meeting your doom at that apartment for not placing first like your mom's boyfriend wanted you to. like a goat getting stuffed before slaughter. it always leads down to that. no matter how many times you try to wish it was different. no matter how many times you imagine it to be different. no matter how many times you try to make it different.
"nice to meet you too." you shake his hand as well with a polite smile on your face. polite. calm. gentle. proper. "and yeah, he seems very eager to be on the team."
"of course, of course. well, it is getting late. why don't you come over for dinner some time?"
"maybe tonight?" tim suddenly adds in. at your hesitant expression, he groans in exasperation. "who do you think we are? blood-sucking bats? come on, we can go to the diner some other time!"
you have just met him... you've just accepted being his friend... you aren't the most social person. you've never had much friends, but even you can understand that dinner with the family doesn't happen until the friend and person have come close in a long period of time. jaylene and zarian have other matters to tend to, so it's going to be just you and tim at a diner. not⏤
ding!
your phone's notification's alarm chimes, and when you check who has sent you a message, you feel like getting on the ground to pray to whatever deity for letting you have a moment of peace.
mom: ⏤he's heavily drunk. don't come home.
a part of you is hit with a strong current full of guilt. this is your mother. you're supposed to be there for her through thick and thin. you're supposed to protect her and be her wall of defense against monsters like him. family look out for each other. you have to take care of her... but she doesn't take care of you. this makes you a terrible person. you know that. she'll probably get beaten to an inch of her life and hide her heavy bruises under makeup that was terribly done in a rush. and then, she'll throw whatever object is in sight at you in a fury of anger.
telling you she made too many sacrifices for you. telling you that you're ruined her life. telling you that she should've aborted you like your father had told her to. telling you exactly what you believe yourself. a curse that should've never been born... she'll be beaten within an inch of her life. but you have already lost yours.
after pretending to text her and sliding your phone into the pocket of your sweatpants, you nod with a sigh of joking resignation. "sure. i asked my mom, and she said it's okay."
"wonderful." mr. wayne nods and gestures to the limo you can see in the parking lot. a bit of overkill, perhaps.
honestly, you're still surprised that gotham's billionaire is inviting you to dinner. this man is the topic of magazines, and you're about to take a ride in his limo. how the hell have you ended up in a situation like this? fate is still fucking with you, isn't it?
you find yourself seated next to tim while mr. wayne and his youngest son, damian, sit on the seats to your right. they're talking about something, but once again, you find yourself half listening and zoning out, staring at nothing until mr. wayne's questions pulls you back to reality.
"so how has school been faring for you?" mr. wayne asks in a cool and collected tone.
you laugh lightly and smile as politely as ever. "pretty good. i hope to leave gotham after graduation to study somewhere else."
"who would want to stay in gotham?" tim rolled his eyes, rolling the first place medal between his fingers. "by the way, remember when i said you looked like someone i know? i was talking about my dad?"
your brows rise in both exasperation and annoyance at his claims. now he's just plain, out right trying to make fun of you in front of a billionaire. your shoulders tense, ready to refute his claims, but mr. wayne surprisingly chuckles and rubs his chin while taking a good look at your face. "well, i can see it, but there's eight billion people out there in the world. i'm bound to look like someone. though, i didn't expect for it to be someone as talented as [name] here."
you force a quiet laugh along at the sound of his tone. foreboding. you know tones like this. like he's hiding something that they all know except for you. it means you've made a mistake in even giving in to tim drake's constant begging. why the hell was he so eager to have you become his friend? why is he so eager to maintain a friendship with you? why the hell has mr. wayne invited you to dinner when he's rumored to be mysterious, secretive, and a literal brick wall that nobody can get past?
"you've achieved so much for a child your age." mr. wayne sets his gaze dead on you. "your father must be so proud."
and his eyes glimmer with that same shine you saw in tim's.
ewwww
this was not proofread so forgive me and uh, i will be turning this into a series
um also making a tag list if anyone wants to be a part of it
#platonic yandere#platonic relationships#platonic#yandere#yandere batfam#yandere batman#yandere batboys#female reader#male yandere#gn reader#bruce wayne#batman#damian wayne#yandere damian wayne#dick grayson#yandere dick grayson#tim drake#yandere tim drake#jason todd#yandere jason todd#depresssant
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I desperately just want to sleep
#I have free time during the day and I would have even more if I didn't need to take naps so it's not revenge procrastination#but the problem is I also procrastinate stuff in the day#I'm getting worse ay worse at doing my school work and trying my best to get better at going to bed#but I'm just tired of this#even when I finally do manage to get a therapist who I can see (got tests from one asked for a woman went to a woman found out she#was leaving the practice at the end of the month to do only virtual and she couldn't do virtual with me since I live too far away legally)#it'll take forever to be able to fix that and I can't wait that long#I'm struggling to get myself to catch up on soanish assignments and I feel so ashamed turning things in a week or more late even though I#know it doesn't get counted off for late work#bc in the past if I put one off or genuinely forgot about it it was rare so I could just say I forgot to submit it#but I currently have 6 or 7 I believe assignments open due sometime in the last month that I have not done#it's not all my work#just some of it#I didn't do school last week because of pain stuff and a wrist problem and I started again today trying to catch up but instead of doing#my math and eating a late dinner I read for an hour and a half#nor did I finish my review for the show I watched earlier tonight so I'll have to do it tomorrow before my other show#I had a bagel at 12:20 am because I just needed something to eat#I haven't practiced piano in months except maybe once#I'm a lead in the school play and just trying to do my best#I'm still trying to cope with all the loss I suffered in november and december#and half the time instead of working even though I know I should even though it's killing my anxiety I just. don't. I watch shows#or videos or I re read fanfic (some parts of which I've read more than twice) or I scroll tumblr#and the only tips for adhd symptoms that therapist gave me after the test results came back were on focus and focus isn't the problem#right now it's doing it period and I need to be awake in 4 and a half hours and I'm so so tired of this#and it's like every day my parents bring up my sleeping with me. I know I promise I'm trying but it just makes me angry#or they're annoyed with me for not eating but I just#I'm so tired#vent#vent tw
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heads up: reader not feelin great, physically. doesn't get really specific. food mentions.
"hey." felix crouches down beside the couch. his hands are a little cold against your skin as he cups your cheek, head tilting as he tries to get a better look at your face as you peer up at him. "soup's done."
"'m fine..." you turn your face back into your sleeve, squeezing your eyes shut. "don't need it..."
he lets out a sigh, leaning in to kiss the side of your head. "honey..." his voice is soft, but the word hits you just as hard. you've always been his baby, his babe, or just your name, since there's intimacy in that, too. honey is saved for when he's worried. "it'll make you feel better to eat something. can't take medicine on an empty stomach, right?"
you just let out a whimper of pain. moving feels like too much for right now, but you know it's because you haven't eaten yet today. feeling sick means that everything is a chore. the only reason you even got out of bed was to let felix in since his arms had been full with the groceries he bought, and you practically face-planted onto the couch after you shut the door.
"i'll feed you." he says softly, fingers brushing against the back of your neck. "does that help?"
it does, a little. you turn your face again so that you can see him. he's still wearing an apron, hair pulled back out of his face as he smiles at you. he's your sunshine, even now when he looks a little tired from worrying. you want to be mad at your roommate for calling him, but... minho had good intentions. you know he did. even when you whined at him for calling felix before heading out to work, he didn't bicker with you but told you to call him if you started feeling any worse since felix wouldn't be there until closer to lunchtime (and even then, he ended up making a run to the store after he checked on you, leaving you boyfriend-less for a little longer). you muster up a nod, and felix kisses your cheek this time.
"good. i'll bring it here, okay? all you have to do is sit up." he starts to walk away, missing the way you paw through the air to try and catch him by the hand. "i'm glad minho called," he calls back to you from the kitchen, "i know it's nothing serious, but... i'm just glad he's looking out for you, too."
the blanket falls onto the couch as you slowly push yourself up so that you're sitting again. your head aches, and for a moment you feel something weird with your sinuses, but it's not as bad once you see how happy felix is that you're up again--even if it's only to eat something. you feel loved as he sits down next to you, carefully sitting the tray on the coffee table as he prepares to feed you soup by the spoonful.
and you feel it again hours later when you rouse to the sound of the front door being opened. minho stops to see you, home from work, and quietly thanks felix for caring for you so much. how wonderful, you think to yourself as felix rests his hand on your cheek, it is to live in a world with so much love embracing you every day.
#nonranghaes.thoughts#stray kids x you#stray kids fluff#stray kids x reader#stray kids imagines#stray kids imagine#skz x y/n#skz x you#skz fluff#skz imagine#skz x reader#skz imagines#lee felix x you#lee felix fluff#lee felix x reader#felix x you#felix fluff#felix x reader#nonranghaes.skz#(i mean if u squint u could also say its poly minlix)#(minho was written to originally just be readers roommate who cares a lot abt them)#(but honestly u could read it as 'readers other bf who has to work and cant call in but good news theres another bf to add into this')
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𝑨𝒍𝒍 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒖𝒍𝒕
Pairing: Alexia Putellas x reader
Words: 2700
Warnings: just general sickness
Summary: You force Alexia to get her flu shot. As a result of that, she gets sick, and she blames you. [requested]
You'd been nagging Alexia about the flu shot for days. It was flu season, and with her being a professional footballer—captain of her team, no less—she couldn't afford to get sick. But Alexia was stubborn, insisting she was too busy, that she didn't need it, that she didn't have time. It was every excuse in the book, her stubborn side flaring up in a way that you both found infuriating and adorable.
"I don't need the shot," she had told you one night, leaning back on the couch with an exasperated sigh. Her Spanish accent thickened whenever she was annoyed, and you had to admit, it made it all the harder to stay mad at her. "I am strong. The flu is nothing to me."
"Is that so?" you'd said, raising an eyebrow. "No kisses until you get it, then."
She stared at you, looking horrified. "What? No... cariño, don't joke." But when you'd crossed your arms and raised your eyebrow higher, she'd narrowed her eyes, muttering something colorful in Spanish.
"It's flu season, Alexia," you'd reminded her, with a tone that was half gentle, half scolding. "Just get the shot. It'll take five minutes."
"No kisses?" she asked, her voice small and wounded, and you could practically see her resolve crumbling. With a sigh of defeat, she muttered, "Fine. Fine, I will get the shot."
And so, the next day, she went to get the shot after training. When she came home, she immediately let you know she'd done it, even holding up her arm with a tiny plaster on it as proof, looking both proud and aggrieved. You'd rewarded her with a kiss on the cheek, which had softened her grumbling... for a little while, at least.
But then, a few days later, it all went south.
You woke up to the sound of sneezing—a loud, dramatic sound coming from your left. Turning over, you found Alexia curled up in bed, her face flushed, her eyes watery, and her nose red. She looked at you with a pout that could only mean trouble.
"I am sick," she said, her voice hoarse, thick with her accent and stuffed up nose.
"Oh no," you murmured, brushing a hand over her forehead. "Alexia, you're burning up."
She batted your hand away with a weak swat, looking thoroughly offended. "This is your fault."
"Excuse me?"
"You... you made me get that shot," she said, sniffling as she rubbed her nose. "I was fine. And now I am not fine."
You couldn't help but stifle a smile, despite her glare. "You know the flu shot doesn't actually give you the flu, right? It's supposed to keep you from getting it worse."
"Does not matter. I was fine before," she muttered, rolling over to bury her face in the pillow with a sniffly huff.
"Alright, alright, come on," you said gently, tugging at the blanket. "Let's get you out of bed and freshened up a bit. You'll feel better, I promise."
She just groaned, pulling the blanket tighter around her. "I don't want to feel better. I want to be left here... to die in peace."
You laughed softly, slipping a hand under her blanket to give her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Well, unfortunately, you've got me to help you feel better. So, let's go brush your teeth, hm?"
Her response was an unintelligible groan, and you had to practically drag her out of bed, guiding her to the bathroom as she shuffled along like a reluctant child.
Once you got her to the sink, she planted her feet, crossing her arms in a pout. "I don't want to brush," she mumbled, her voice small and congested.
"Alexia," you sighed, picking up her toothbrush. "Just open up, it'll only take a minute."
But she shook her head stubbornly, eyes narrowing at you in defiance. "No quiero. I don't want."
With a little smirk, you stepped closer, pressing her back against the counter as you gently took her hands, holding them in one of yours to keep her from pushing you away. "Be good for me, hm?"
She squirmed in your grip, cheeks flushing. "You... you're being a bully," she muttered, her eyes widening as she realized she was completely trapped.
"Oh, am I?" you murmured, pressing a quick kiss to her cheek before holding the toothbrush up to her mouth. "Open up, love."
With a long-suffering sigh, she finally parted her lips, letting you brush her teeth, though she continued to glare at you the whole time, like this was the greatest injustice she'd ever suffered. You finished quickly, wiping her mouth gently with a towel before releasing her hands.
"There, that wasn't so bad, was it?" you teased, giving her a soft smile.
She huffed, crossing her arms as she leaned against the counter. "You're lucky you're cute."
You chuckled, attempting to guide her through to the kitchen, buts she stubbornly resisted, insisting she wasn't hungry. "I'm not eating," she grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest like a petulant child. "Not hungry."
"Alexia, you need to eat something before you can take medicine."
"I don't care," she muttered, turning her head away. But her defiance was cut short by a sudden sneeze, and you sighed, pulling a tissue from the bedside table and gently wiping her nose.
"See? You're miserable, and you'll only feel better if you take care of yourself." You smoothed her hair back gently. "Let me make you something light, just a little fruit and yogurt."
She grumbled under her breath, muttering what you were sure were more Spanish curses, but she didn't stop you as you headed to the kitchen yourself, deciding it would be best to just leave her in bed. When you returned with a small bowl of yogurt and fruit, she was curled up under the blanket, looking thoroughly unimpressed.
"Come on, just a few bites," you coaxed, sitting on the edge of the bed and holding out a spoonful.
With a dramatic sigh, she opened her mouth, taking a tiny bite and chewing slowly, her expression making it clear that she was doing this entirely against her will. "Happy now?"
"Very," you replied, feeding her another spoonful.
After she'd eaten enough to satisfy you, it was finally time for the cold medicine. You held up the small bottle, and she looked at it like it was poison.
"No," she said, shaking her head with absolute certainty. "I'm not taking it."
"Alexia," you warned, your tone gentle but firm. "It'll help you feel better."
She crossed her arms over her chest, her eyes narrowing. "I don't need it."
You let out a little sigh, knowing you'd need to take a different approach. With a determined smile, you climbed onto the bed, straddling her lap and pinning her arms to her sides with your legs.
Her eyes widened. "What... what are you doing?" she stammered, clearly caught off guard.
"Ensuring cooperation," you replied, holding up the medicine with a teasing smile. "Now, you can either take it willingly, or I'll have to make you.”
She squirmed beneath you, cheeks flushing as she glared up at you. "You are... you are a tyrant," she muttered, though the hint of a smile tugged at her lips. "I can't believe you."
"Oh, the horror," you teased, holding the spoon close to her lips. "Now, be good and open up."
After a moment of stubborn silence, she finally sighed, parting her lips just enough to let you give her the medicine. She grimaced as she swallowed, looking thoroughly unimpressed.
"Disgusting," she muttered, wrinkling her nose.
You leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. "Good girl. Now, back under the covers with you."
She scoffed, though you could see the hint of a smile in her eyes as she settled back into bed. "I will remember this, you know. One day, I will get my revenge."
You chuckled, tucking the blanket around her. "I look forward to it."
*
You'd barely left Alexia's side since she'd gotten sick. Her eyes were puffy and bloodshot, her nose chapped and red from all the sneezing, and her voice, hoarse and scratchy, sounded pitifully weak. As miserable as she was, she still held a death grip on you, refusing to let you out of bed for more than a minute or two at a time.
"I'm not kidding, Alexia," you murmured, gently rubbing circles on her back with one hand. "I really need to pee.”
She just grumbled, shifting so her face was buried even deeper into the crook of your neck. "No. You can hold it."
You sighed, smiling despite yourself as she tightened her arms around you, determined not to let you go. Her hot breath tickled your neck, raspy and uneven as she tried to keep her congested breathing steady.
"I'll come back, you know," you tried to reason with her, running your fingers along her back. "You'll barely even notice I'm gone."
She lifted her head just enough to give you a pouty look, her eyes narrowed. "You leave... and I'll... I'll be alone. Sick. And alone."
You laughed softly, cupping her cheek. "You're so dramatic when you're unwell, you know that?"
She sniffled, her glare softening only slightly as she leaned back into your embrace. "I am sick because of you, so you should be here."
"Oh, so now you're blaming me again?" you teased, reaching for a tissue as she began sniffling more insistently.
"Yes," she said, sounding a little choked as you brought the tissue up to her nose. "You made me get that stupid shot."
You couldn't help but smile as she blew her nose, letting out a small huff when you dabbed her nostrils gently, trying not to further irritate the already raw skin.
"Okay, you're right. I'm the villain here," you said, pressing a light kiss to her forehead as she snuggled back down. "So I'll be right back to atone for my sins. Just give me one minute, alright?"
She pouted, but after a moment of hesitation, she finally relented, albeit begrudgingly. "One minute," she grumbled, watching you with narrowed eyes as you slid out from beneath her.
You were barely gone for thirty seconds when you heard her weak voice from the other room. "¡Cariño!" she called, her hoarse voice laced with a mixture of impatience and distress.
You hurried back, finding her curled up in bed with a fresh pout. She immediately extended her arms out to you, looking as needy as ever.
"Come here," she muttered, pulling you down as soon as you were within reach. "You're taking too long."
"Alexia, I was gone for less than a minute," you chuckled, allowing her to tug you back under the covers.
"Too long," she insisted, her voice muffled as she snuggled her face into your shoulder. Her nose brushed against your collarbone, making you realize she was probably on the verge of sneezing again.
You sighed, grabbing another tissue just in time to catch her next sneeze. She sniffled, her nose redder than ever as you gently dabbed at it again.
She winced, pushing your hand away with a small groan. "Ow. Stop. You're hurting me."
"I'm sorry, love," you murmured, brushing her hair back from her forehead as she closed her eyes. "I know it's sore. Just a little more, and I'll leave it alone."
She let out a tiny huff, shifting closer as she adjusted her head against your neck. "This is your fault," she muttered, half-asleep. "You know that, right?"
"Yes, yes. Entirely my fault," you agreed, pulling her tighter against you as she sighed in sleepy satisfaction.
For a moment, she was quiet, her breathing shallow and uneven as she drifted off. But it didn't last long. Within a few minutes, she was shifting restlessly, her forehead crinkling as she sneezed again. She groaned, sniffling miserably as she buried her face deeper into your shoulder.
"Ugh," she mumbled, her voice raspy and stuffed. "I hate this."
"I know, baby," you whispered, rubbing soothing circles on her back. "It'll pass soon. Just gotta hang in there."
She shook her head, her brow furrowing. "No, I won't. I'm... I'm dying." She looked up at you with those big, tired eyes, looking completely pitiful.
"Oh, really?" you teased, trying not to laugh at her dramatic declaration. "You're dying?"
"Yes," she insisted, her tone dead serious. "This is the end for me."
You couldn't help but smile as you wiped her nose again, ignoring her glare. "Alright then. Anything you want me to tell your teammates?"
"Tell them..." she paused, her eyes fluttering closed as she leaned heavily against you. "Tell them... I went out a hero. Strong... noble."
"A strong, noble hero taken down by a common cold?" you joked, earning yourself another weak glare.
She let out a tiny huff, her head falling back to rest against your shoulder. "You are mean to me," she muttered. "When I am sick, you should be... you know. Nicer."
"Oh, I'm not being nice right now?" you asked, raising an eyebrow as you resumed rubbing her back.
She sighed, her face softening as she nuzzled closer. "You are... a little. But I need more," she mumbled, her voice fading as she drifted off again.
For the next hour or so, you stayed snuggled up with her, her feverish body practically glued to yours. Her head was tucked beneath your chin, her arms snug around your waist as if she were afraid you'd disappear if she loosened her grip even a little.
Her breathing grew heavier as she fell into a deeper sleep, her face twitching every now and then when a fresh wave of congestion hit. She coughed, letting out a weak whine that made you squeeze her a little tighter.
You must've dozed off at some point because the next thing you knew, she was tugging on your sleeve, her expression both sleepy and grumpy as she looked up at you.
"Thirsty," she mumbled, rubbing her eyes.
"Alright, I'll get you some water," you murmured, starting to sit up. But as soon as you moved, her arms tightened around you, pulling you back down with surprising strength.
"No. Don't move," she muttered, her voice sounding even hoarser than before.
"Alexia, I need to get you the water."
She shook her head, snuggling closer. "No. Just... just stay a little longer."
You couldn't help but laugh softly, pulling her back against you. "If you don't let me go, you'll stay thirsty," you pointed out, trailing your fingers along her back in gentle circles.
She sighed, clearly torn, before finally loosening her grip with a pout. "Fine," she muttered. "But hurry."
You got up quickly, grabbing a glass of water from the kitchen before hurrying back to her side. She accepted the water gratefully, taking small sips as she looked up at you with a suspiciously grateful expression.
"Better?" you asked, brushing a few stray strands of hair from her face.
She nodded, setting the glass aside before pulling you back down with a determined look. "Now stay.”
"Bossy," you teased, letting her wrap herself around you like a clingy octopus.
"I am sick," she muttered, her voice muffled against your shoulder. "I can be bossy."
"Alright, alright, fair enough." You gently traced your hand over her back, feeling her finally relax against you again.
For a few minutes, she was quiet, drifting in and out of sleep. But soon, she was shifting again, looking up at you with a soft, miserable pout.
"My nose hurts," she mumbled, sniffling loudly.
"I know, love," you murmured, kissing her forehead. "But it'll feel better soon, I promise."
She huffed, clearly not convinced, and nuzzled back against your neck, her nose brushing your collarbone as she settled in once more.
After a few more minutes, she started coughing again, her whole body shuddering with the effort. You held her close, rubbing her back in soothing circles until the coughing fit finally subsided.
"This is all your fault," she mumbled once she'd caught her breath, looking up at you with a halfhearted glare.
"Yes, I know," you replied, smiling as you kissed her forehead. "All my fault."
"Good," she muttered, closing her eyes again as she snuggled closer. "At least you know."
You let out a soft laugh, resting your cheek against her hair as she drifted off once more. Even sick and stubborn as ever, she was still your Alexia, your fiercely independent, soft-hearted girl who refused to let you go.
**
Tags:
@girlgenius1111 @codiemarin @ceesimz @marysfics @goldenempyrean @silentwolfsstuff @xxnaiaxx @liloandstitchstan
#groucy alexia putellas#soft alexia putellas#alexia putellas x reader#alexia putellas x you#alexia putellas x y/n#woso community#woso x reader#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso appreciation
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Heres a reminder for you that being dissociated isn't limited to the common misconception where you are frozen in place, incapable of doing anything or even thinking, or experiencing a significant time gap,, those things. (This is a very important post, read till bottom so im happy!)
And while its hard to spot the milder signs when you're dissociating, don't worry i got you covered by bringing awareness, im showing what those signs could look like:
Dazing/blanking out several times
Hands looking weird (depersonalization)
Surroundings also looking weird (derealization)
Feeling detached emotionally, physically, or both
Light-headedness
Less reactive in responding
Forget things more often
Unable to focus or keep concentration straight
And many more..!
When you have multiple of those signs at once, then chances are you are dissociating (extra note that it can also co-occur with derealization/depersonalization). While it can be caused by various factors, i would like to add that it may or may not get worse as time passes and no one wants that thing to snowball until it got too bad (remember, preventing now is better than dealing later) so having a few tips would help:
Grounding (sensory): listening to music, feeling different textures, paying attention to things in your surroundings, trying different fragrant or scents, have some snacks to occupy your senses
Grounding (physically): feel your chest as you breathe, get your body moving to redirect focus, splash some cold water, hold something you can squeeze (such as a stress ball)
Practice being mindful. As it can help you re-anchor back to reality faster, regulate better, building more resilience, increasing awareness of oneself's state
Sometimes we go do our day without giving a thought that were detached from reality, usually by going autopilot and scrolling through social medias without being aware (well, atleast for me) and forget lots of things while being dysregulated at the end. So by being aware of the mild signs and incorporating grounding skills im sure memory gaps and those funny aftermath stuffs won't be a problem anymore, have a good day peeps.
EDIT: I forgot to mention that another sign is your hearing feels muffled, that you can hear sounds feel more distant despite close, i thought it could be grouped with the “less reactive” before.
EDIT 2: It is true that sometimes these techniques will not work,, so it's recommended to create a peaceful environment in hopes of going away sooner when waiting it out. grab some videos to watch, put some of your favorite musics or cuddle your soft pillows (if any, pets) and stay comfy! Do not stress about it because it'll be counterproductive. Full explanation at here.
- j
#did#did community#actually did#did system#dissociative identity disorder#did osdd#plural#system stuff#sysblr#Jeducates
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HI I LOVE ur lads headcanons ‼️ idk if u do angst but im feeling some angsty/hurt/comfort........... can i pls request the lads men's reaction to the reader rejecting their confession bc we think they deserve better...... someone who doesn't have a heart condition (like the mc) or something........
Oh my gosh, thank you so much!! And oh man, I love angst and hurt/comfort, as long as I get to give it a tiny bit of hope/a happy ending! I felt this one though, I've thought about it before with my own MC…….. a few dozen times- Hope you enjoy, and thank you for the request! <3
Love and Deepspace Li’s reactions to you rejecting their confession due to feelings of inadequacy
Rafayel -
Rafayel is… surprised, to say the least.
Not only do you not have any memory of him or the things you did together- the things you did to him- but you also are straight up turning him down when he finally realized that he needs to confess to you all over again.
He's pretty upset.
It'll definitely turn into an argument, and you know he's hurt. Damn, you're hurt too, just having to turn him down. He makes you feel something, like you're special. Like you're everything to him. Like you're not…
Broken.
And it'll come out eventually. Maybe not blatantly so, but in small ways, your feelings of inadequacy will start to leak through the cracks that are forming in your resolve as you try to refuse a man who has already been refused his love by fate and prophecy for far too long.
And somehow, that makes it so much worse. Because he can fight fate, he can go against the currents of time and the ever evolving cruelty of human nature. But he can't do anything about the feelings raging inside your own head.
He's sure going to try though.
Angrily but calmly, he will start firing off things he has done for you, just because he's loved you so much, throughout all of your time together and even before. He doesn't know if it'll make it worse, make you feel like he already does too much for whatever it is you see yourself as, but he's going to do it anyway. And slowly, it'll start forming into the things you two do together- the things you've done for him when he needs you.
And you're going to be there a while, because until you start to realize, until he starts to chip away at that dark feeling in the deepest reaches of your mind and heart, he's not going to let up.
Not now, not ever.
Sylus -
He's a bit taken aback, but he's not particularly surprised. He had seen this coming, mentally prepared himself for it, even. He knew after his treatment of you when the two of you had just met again for the first time, that any sort of official relationship between you two would be tricky to get to. Especially putting an actual label on it.
He'll be a lot more surprised when he reads between the lines at your words, and realizes it's not because you're still scared of him, but because you don't think you're good enough for him.
"You can't be serious, sweetie."
He's not going to force you to accept his confession, but regardless of how timid or aggressive you become, whether you escalate it vocally or try to exit the conversation, he's not arguing with you. He pretty much refuses to, as he instead begins to state snarky facts as he crosses his arms, watching your reactions as he does.
"When you patched my wounds a month ago, was I not deserving of your hands caring for me because they were shaky and belonging to you? How about that girl you muttered about that we saw at the café who was mad at her boyfriend to the point of shouting, when he didn't get her the right cake she wanted? Are you saying you're worse than her? Helping me on jobs simply because you want to exist near me is… not good enough for me?"
"Sylus, that's not what I'm saying-"
"Oh don't worry sweetie. I know exactly what it is you're saying. I just know it's a particularly misinformed, self loathing thought for you to be having. Don't you think it's insulting for you to decide who I give my love to? After every calculated decision you have witnessed me make?"
He'll finally soften, reaching out a hand to gently rest on the side of your neck, his thumb brushing against your cheek in a gentle back and forth.
"You don't need to be concerning yourself with what I deserve in a partner. You should have faith in my opinions, if not for yourself, but for your confidence in me, sweetie. After that, the rest is up to what you truly want in your heart."
Zayne -
His reaction is definitely the most reserved initially, especially until he realizes why exactly you're turning him down.
He definitely has the passing thought that maybe you're just misunderstanding him again, just like back with the snow seals when the two of you were still kids.
When he realizes that's not the case, and instead, it's your own internalized feelings, he's first a bit relieved, and secondly- pretty perturbed.
"It's interesting to know that's your perspective, given how much you enjoy those fictional stories with ironic pairings. I would think that it would be the most romantic thing for a heart patient to be in a relationship with a cardiac surgeon.
His biting but well-meaning quips aside, he's not quite sure how to break it to you that he used to be in a similar boat, and still is to some capacity. Which is partly why he's a bit upset to understand your perspective.
He's genuinely surprised you haven't processed the timeline of the two of you and your lives. Your accident that caused the state of your heart, his leaving to study medicine and become a specialist in cardiology and a renowned cardiac surgeon- are you not able to see that it's not an inadequacy for him, but his own lack of knowledge when you first started having issues made himself feel inadequate? Why he left without a word for years in the first place?
And not just that- it also applies to other fields too. He has no issues helping you where you need him, because he knows the extent of your capabilities, much like he knows his own. And he will spend forever if he needs to, to show you that loving is not about who does more. It's about doing what your partner needs, no matter how much or how little that is, and loving each other through every hard moment.
And you're about to hear every ounce of his convincing, opinions, and own feelings, until you start to see. Until you finally see.
Xavier -
Unless you tell it to him straight, he's not going to know why you rejected him. He'll be hurt, but he'll accept your rejection graciously and politely, before trying to figure out just how to get you to accept it.
There's an increase in claw machine dates, movie night invitations, and how much he helps you with missions or even just around your apartment. Eventually, you process the weird behavior and you're all but forced to confront him on really truly why you rejected him.
It's Xavier, so you try to play it off as a lighthearted situation or a joke, but you can see his expression darkening, and you're not sure if it's because of him being upset at your words, or realizing just how much time he has sunk into you with how... broken of a person you are.
Turns out, it's the former!
It's hard to not realize such, as he's pulling you into the tightest hug he's probably ever grabbed you into.
For a while, it's just you and him standing there, with him squeezing you tightly and you not knowing what to do with your hands or the lump rising in the back of your throat. He doesn't really know what to say, but he does know he needs to say something.
"I'll definitely make you see that you're more than enough for me."
"Xavier- that's not how this work-"
"I know, and I don't care. I- I need you to know that you're everything to me. You're not inadequate, or broken, or anything you've been telling yourself. You're more than enough. You're more than everything to me. And I'm not going anywhere until you finally understand that."
#.writey#love and deepspace#lads#x reader#lds#lnds#love and deepspace sylus#love and deepspace rafayel#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace xavier#rafayel x reader#sylus x reader#zayne x reader#xavier x reader#.req
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Cough Syrup
written for @steddiemicrofic August
prompt: plug || wc: 437 || rating: M || cws: sick fic, reference to child neglect, references to sex
~~~
"Baby," Eddie sighs, "just plug your nose. I promise it'll go down easier." Steve keeps his mouth sealed and shakes his head as he leans further back into the pillows propping him up against the headboard. Eddie’s very carefully holding the spoon in front of Steve’s face, syrupy red liquid on the verge of overflowing onto their comforter.
“You say that every time,” Steve complains. He moves his head to the side as Eddie makes his move and misses. “But it smells, and it’s gross, and it felt thick and disgusting in my mouth yesterday, and I’ll be fine without it.”
Steve watches as another thread of Eddie’s patience unravels. After three days wasting away of fever and bone-wrenching aches, he’s surprised Eddie hasn’t just dropped him off on the hospital curb in a cardboard box, sign affixed to the side reading ‘Oversized baby for adoption. May need extra care. Fully vaccinated’.
“Steven James Harrington.” Full government name– with his correct middle name– means he’s in deep trouble. “You’ve inhaled nasty, probably radioactive, floating Upside-Down ash. You’ve accidentally swallowed demobat blood. You’ve drank shitty beer out of a communal bong, had your tongue down every girl’s throat in Hawkins, and inside my asshole–”
“Oh my god Eds, don’t say it like that.”
“–yet for some reason, you refuse a tiny bit of cough syrup to help you sleep.”
Steve rolls his eyes and sighs. In his attempts at being dramatic, he breaks into another coughing fit that has him reaching for the water glass on the nightstand next to all of his used tissues.
“I’ve been sick before and I’ve never needed drugs.”
“Never needed it,” Eddie leads, grabbing his hand, “or have your parents never offered it before?”
The question hits like a punch to the gut. He’d never thought about it that way. How his parents told him he’d get better soon, that he just needed some soup and crackers. If he focuses on being sick, it’ll just make him worse. How if he ate healthier he wouldn’t get sick in the first place.
“Stevie,” Eddie says gently, running his fingertips across Steve’s sweaty, overheated forehead. The fondness floods over him like a tidal wave, washing away all thoughts of his parents’ lack of love and care, something that's always so obvious from Eddie.
“The medicine will help you sleep. And if you sleep better,” Eddie says, and Steve can already see the trap forming, “then I’ll sleep better.”
Eddie smirks as Steve swallows around the spoon, nose plugged. They know Steve would do anything to help Eddie, even if it means helping himself too.
#steve harrington having absolutely no idea how to take care of himself#eddie guilting steve into doing it by making it seem like it's actually helping someone else#eddie will always take care of his baby#steve harrington's parent are shitty as per the usual#sick fic#steddie microfic#steddie ficlet#steddie#queeniewritesstories#steve harrington#eddie munson
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Klaus Mikaelson x Reader!Soulmate x Elijah Mikaelson PART 10
Word Count- 7.2k
Warnings- Swearing, blood, violence, death, Damon’s ass/Damon BEING an ass, shitty Google translate, spelling mistakes(I'm wayyy too tired to edit this rn)
A/N- some of this is not canon just because I love a character too much and she deserved better in the show.
“Are you just going to keep sulking in here,” I ask from my position in Damon’s doorway.
Damon answers me back with a loud groan mixed with what I believe to be a growl, “Tell me again why you’re here. And why I haven’t killed you yet?”
If I had just met Damon I would be scared of what he just asked me, but after these past weeks of knowing him, I’ve realized most of his threats are half-assed. So I just shrug and walk into his room.
“My mother and brother are away for the week visiting family, leaving me home alone. And, well, I don’t feel like having “he who shall not be named,” come and kill me in my sleep. And you haven’t killed me because you don’t want to. I’ve called you many bad names to your face, and yet I stand here, unharmed."
“Here you stand annoying the hell out of me. Again.”
I roll my eyes and sit on the edge of Damon’s bed. Damon still hasn’t moved from his position under the covers.
“Damon,” I turn over my shoulder to look at him and he lets out yet another groan to acknowledge he’s listening, “I’m going to be honest with you.”
“Nothing new there,” I hear him say under his breath sarcastically.
“You’re kind of embarrassing to watch right now,” I turn to see him fully glaring at me now, “You’re how old? Like five thousand years or something like that? It’s time you grew up.”
“Says the high schooler.”
“Says the man in love with a high schooler,” I bite back which has him shutting up momentarily.
“You don't know anything,” He says as he finally sits up in his bed. His white sheet falling down, revealing his naked chest. I quickly avert my eyes, not because I’m attracted to him but because seeing Damon half-naked would be like seeing my annoying ass distant cousin naked. No, thank you.
“Don’t bullshit me, Demon-spawn,” I point an accusing finger at him resulting in him glaring at me some more.
“I know you have feelings for Elena, everyone and their bloody mothers knows. And as much as I like Stefan, I also don’t think it should be something you need to feel bad for,” I think momentarily and tap my chin in thought, “Well, okay. Maybe a little bad because she’s 17 and you’re like 1,000 and she’s also your little brother’s girlfriend,” I catch Damon’s deadly look and stop rambling, “Moving along…What I’m trying to say is that we can’t control who we catch feelings for. And honestly, Elena’s pretty and nice as hell so I don’t blame you there. But what we can control is how we choose to express those feelings.”
Damon just stares blankly at me and I feel like I’d be better off giving a toddler this speech.
“What you’re doing right now, sulking and getting mad at everyone around you for something that is out of our control isn’t helping anyone. It’s only making things worse. Elena’s my best friend and I know she’s scared out of her mind right now but doesn’t want to say it because it'll cause more stress for the people she loves. What she needs right now is all of us. After tonight is over and Elijah’s elixir brings her back then you can go back to your hissy fits but right now,” I stand up and face him, planting my hands on my hips in a power pose, “You need to get your ass out of bed and get a fucking grip.”
Damon and I hold each other’s glares for a straight minute before he huffs, throws his blanket off of him, and gets out of bed. I have to fight a smirk as I get overly proud of my pep talk.
“I’m really starting to miss when it was just puke coming out of that mouth of yours,” Damon growls as he walks to the bathroom and pulls down his boxers without a second thought. My eyes fly out of my head as I get a full look at Damon’s white ass. I quickly turn around and gag.
“Dude! Seriously, warn a girl!”
---
“I don’t remember you being so…talky,” Damon’s voice yells from over the water of his shower.
I frown as I think about his comment and sit back down on the edge of his bed facing the front door and not the bathroom. Not wanting to get a face full of his behind again, or worse…ugh.
“I…don’t think I’ve ever been talky. There has never been a reason for me to be,” I say back to him not really caring if he hears or not.
A moment later I hear the shower water stop and his footsteps padding around behind me.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean,” Damon says from next to me and I slowly turn hoping he’s at least half decent.
Thankfully, he has covered his behind with jeans and is currently slipping a shirt over his chest.
I think about his question and then shrug my shoulders, “I’ve never really had friends to talk to, and whenever I had tried talking to people they just hadn’t cared. So I never really saw the point in talking.”
Damon stops fixing the buttons on his shirt momentarily to look at me. His eyebrows are drawn together and the look in his eyes isn’t one I think I’ve seen from him before. Something about it almost seems kind of…human. But within another second it’s gone and his lip upturns into a smirk.
“People are a waste of time anyway. The only good thing about them…,” He takes a step closer to me and leans down so he’s in my face, “Is there blood.”
I huff as I stand up and push past him heading towards the door, “And here I thought I could actually have a half-decent conversation with you. My mistake.”
I start walking through the halls toward the living room where Elena, Stefan, and Elijah are. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Damon catch up to me so we’re walking side by side.
“You’re kind of annoying,” He says and I have to fight the urge to not punch him.
“Gee, thanks,” I go to walk faster but he catches up to me again.
“What I mean is…,” He pauses for a moment trying to find his words, “You may be annoying but that doesn’t mean what you have to say is pointless or something that shouldn’t be heard. Screw anyone who tells you otherwise…or just kill them.”
I look at him with a confused look matching the confused feelings I now have, “Thank you? I think.”
“Don’t mention it,” He leans down and glares at me, “Seriously, I will kill you if you tell anyone what I just said.”
I suck on my teeth and then nod my head, “And there’s the Demon we all know and loathe.”
“Right, back at you, Pukey.”
I watch as Damon’s eyebrows furrow as we get closer to the living room and as we enter he speaks up, “Then why are we letting him break the curse?”
I follow Damon into the living room and see Elena and Stefan sitting together on a sofa and Elijah standing before them. Elijah’s eyes lock onto mine and I acknowledge him by sending him a small smile which he just returns with a nod. Okay, Rude.
“We can kill him today. With Bonnie,” Damon says and I realize we’re talking about him. At the mention of him, I begin to clench my fists as a surge of anger rises through me but stop myself since I don’t feel like accidentally cutting myself in a room of vampires. I take my seat on a loveseat next to Elena, who sends me a warm smile before turning towards Damon.
“No. Bonnie can’t use that much power without dying.”
“I’ll write her a great eulogy,” Damon’s words have me turning in my seat and glaring at him. So much for my speech getting to him.
“It’s not an option Damon,” You tell him, Elena.
Stefan sighs, “Alright, how do we break this curse?”
“Well, the ritual itself is relatively straightforward. The ingredients, so to speak you already know,” Elijah answers.
“The moonstone,” Stefan says.
“A witch will channel the power of the full moon to release the spell that’s bound within the stone. After that Klaus, being both a werewolf and a vampire, will sacrifice one of each.”
“And where do I fit into it,” Elena asks him.
“The final part of the ritual. Klaus must drink the blood of the doppelganger…to the point of your death.”
Elijah’s words have both Stefan and I taking deep breaths.
“And that’s where you come in.”
Elijah goes to the shelf behind him and opens a little wooden box, “This is an elixir that I acquired some 500 years ago for Katerina. It possesses the mystical properties of resuscitation.”
“So I’ll be dead..”
“And then you won’t.”
Damon the grouch speaks up, “That’s your plan? A magical witch potion with no expiration date,” He turns to Elena, “You want to come back to life, what…What about John’s ring?”
“Those rings only work on humans. The doppelganger is a supernatural occurrence. Odds are…the ring won’t work.”
“I’ll take those odds over your elixir. What if it doesn’t work Elena?”
“Then I guess I’ll just be dead.”
Damon shoots his brother a look, but knowing Stefan, he’ll go with whatever Elena wants. Even if he doesn’t agree. Damon realizes this too before shooting another glare at the group before leaving the living room back to where we originally came from.
“Do we know if Klaus has everything he needs to do this? Does he have a werewolf?”
“Klaus has been waiting over a thousand years to break this curse. If he doesn’t already have a werewolf my guess is by tonight, he will.”
—
I watch from my position on the couch as Stefan follows his brother outside. That’s going to be a fun conversation.
Elena approaches Elijah, “You’d think he’d understand why I’m willing to do this.”
“Why are you?”
“I’m the key to breaking the curse. Klaus is here because of me. If I don’t stop him, then he’s gonna hurt people. It’s that simple.”
I frown sadly to myself and fight back the watering that has started in my eyes. This isn’t fair. None of this is.
“You know, there’s a possibility this elixir won’t work. I don't want to mislead you.”
“I know the chance I’m taking.”
The tense atmosphere is broken by a door slamming shut and a woman yelling from the foyer.
“Jenna, Jenna!”
“Get out!”
I quickly rise from my seat and go to follow behind Elena to check on Jenna, but a hand grabs my own, pulling me back.
“Wait here,” Elijah’s stern voice says to me as he drops my hand and follows behind Elena. I watch his retreating figure and shake my head. Who tf does this guy think he’s talking to?
I run towards the foyer and freeze when I see Ric standing there. Or Klaus, I guess. My breathing gets faster and I’m debating on whether to swing on him or pass out.
“Jenna, put the cross-bow down, okay? It’s me.”
Stefan joins us and Elijah comes to stand in front of me, not before shooting me a disapproving look.
“What’s going on,” Elena asks the two adults.
“It’s me, Elena, I swear, okay? He let me go. Klaus let me go,” I frown at Ric’s words and look to Elijah to see if he can tell if Ric is telling the truth or not but his face is completely still.
“Prove it,” Damon who has now joined says.
“Okay, uh, the first night you and I spent together Jeremy walked in right when-”
“Ok! It’s him,” Jenna exclaims as she drops her weapon. Ew. Everyone in the room throws glances at each other before turning back towards Ric.
“Why did he let you go,” Stefan asks.
“He wanted me to deliver a message. The sacrifice happens tonight.”
—-
“Katherine was there,” Ric says from his position on the couch. We all moved back into the living room to keep discussing our plans for tonight.
“She’s under compulsion. Damon snuck her vervain but she can't leave until Klaus tells her she can.”
“Where is Damon,” Elena questions, and I get a bit unnerved. Not knowing where Damon is is not an ideal situation.
“I saw him go upstairs,” Jenna says.
Elena stands up and goes towards his room and I go to follow her but Elijah grabs my upper arm, “I need to speak with you,” I begin to argue back as he pulls me into the next room.
“Dude let go of me,” I hiss at him and he drops my arm and stares blankly at me.
“Do not dude me, Elskan,” Elijah says with that stupid monotone voice of his that makes me want to wrap my hands around his throat.
“You don’t get to tell me what to do Elijah,” I whisper yell to him so the others don’t overhear us, “And stop with that stupid nickname.”
Elijah narrows his eyes at me, “You are making it incredibly hard for me to protect you.”
“Oh I’m sorry,” I roll my eyes sarcastically, “I didn’t realize you actually cared, since you’ve been acting like you don't.”
Elijah’s narrowed eyes morph into ones of confusion, “What are you talking about?”
“Seriously! One second you’re making all these promises to protect me and being all nice and stuff and then the next moment you won’t even acknowledge my existence.”
“It would be impossible for me to not acknowledge your existence, Y/n. There is not a single moment where I am not searching for you. This situation,” He gestures between us, “Is not something I take lightly. And keeping you safe is now my most important mission in this life. So I apologize if I have hurt your feelings whilst doing that.”
I’m frozen as I listen to Elijah and he takes a single step towards me. He reaches his hand up and brushes a stray hair behind my ear.
“You have no idea how long I have waited for you,” His words have me frowning in confusion as he brushes his finger across my cheek, “But, I fear that if I let myself get too close then it will only put you in more danger and I would rather dagger myself before ever letting that happen.”
My chest and my brain don't seem to be working properly as I just stare wide-eyed at the man in front of me. I try to think of something, anything really to say but I can’t seem to get my mouth to form a sentence.
A loud bang comes from upstairs and Elijah gives me one more look before exiting. I feel like I’m on autopilot as I walk towards the noise, catching sight of Ric and Jenna running towards it as well. I make my way up to Damon’s room and gasp as I see Stefan with a very big piece of wood through his stomach. Ric tries to grab Damon but the ladder pushes him off him before walking out of the room.
“Okay, Jenna, downstairs in the basement are some blood bags,” Ric tells Jenna who is standing in front of me, “Go get them, now. Go!”
Jenna leaves as Elena rips the wood out of Stefan. I walk over and kneel next to them as Elena holds and tries to comfort her hurt boyfriend.
“I’m so sorry,” Stefan groans out.
I frown, confused, “Why is he sorry? He’s the one who got stabbed?”
I’m ignored for a moment as Elena shushes Stefan until he passes out and with tearful eyes, she looks over to me, “Damon he…he fed me his blood. Y/n, I don’t want to be a vampire”
'My chest practically caves in on itself as I hear my friend's small sobs and shake my head in denial, “No…no. There has to be another way. There has to be Elena,” I stand up and look at her once more, “You’re not going to be a vampire.”
—
I storm through the halls and down the stairs until I see Damon in the living room pouring himself a glass of whatever alcohol he has on hand. That anger from before rises at the idea of what he just did.
“You selfish bastard,” I storm over to him and I see Elijah try to stop me from the corner of my eye, only to receive my hand in his face. And as Damon turns around to look at me he receives my fist in his face.
Damon hisses as my fist flies across his cheekbone and I fight back tears at the pain in my knuckles. I’ve never thrown a punch before but I didn’t realize it would hurt this much. Jesus.
Damon looks back at me as if my punch did nothing to him, which it probably didn’t and I expect him to charge at me, and I’m assuming Elijah does as well because he moves next to me. But all Damon does is stare at me, raise his glass to his lips, downs it, and then exits the living room.
“You’ve never thrown a punch before have you,” Elijah’s voice has me turning my gaze over to him.
I look at him sheepishly, “Is it that obvious?”
Elijah stares at me and from his face I think he's trying to debate whether to be amused by me or scold me, “A bit, but I applaud you for the effort,” Elijah’s eyes dart towards my hurting hand and he picks it up with his own and inspects it.
“You’ll have some bruising but thankfully there appears to be no breakage.”
I let out a pained hiss as one of his fingers brushed against my middle knuckle. He instantly stops and looks at me.
“I can heal you if you’d like,” He asks me and I remember back to when he healed me the first time. It feels like another lifetime ago.
“I’ll be fine,” I dismiss him and he nods but doesn’t drop my hand. He does reach his other hand up and uses his thumb to wipe a stray tear off my cheek.
“I’m sorry about Elena,” I quickly remember why I punched Damon in the first place and go to question about the elixir but he shakes his head as if he already knows what I’m thinking, “It won’t work any longer. Damon made sure of that when he fed her his blood. When Elena dies she’ll wake up as a vampire."
I shake my head in denial and feel the tears reach my eyes again, “No... Elijah. There has to be another way! Please tell me there’s another way.”
Elijah’s features form to one of sorrow as if he can feel the pain I’m in, “I’m sorry, Elskan. I truly am.”
I shake my head and bite down hard on my lip to try to stop my tears. Elijah reaches up his hand though and frees my bottom lip from my teeth with his thumb.
“Come here,” Elijah says as he pulls me into him and wraps his arms around my body. The smell of something masculine, almost smoky, surrounds me as he rests his chin on my head. After everything that has happened, if I were to die like this in his embrace, I don’t think I would regret it.
—
I wipe the remnants of my smeared mascara as I look at myself in my car mirror. After Elijah left the Salvatore’s saying he had some loose ends to clean up before tonight and to not get myself into any more trouble, I went to check on Elena.
She hugged me for about ten minutes straight and I just rubbed her back as she cried into my shoulder. And I may or may not have cried along with her, feeling heartbroken for my friend.
Elena and Stefan then left together to go spend her last day as a human together, which is as bittersweet as it is heartbreaking. And after bidding Jenna and Ric a goodbye I found myself driving to the Mystic Grill. That’s why I am now sitting in it’s parking lot trying to collect myself and trying to keep myself busy for what is to happen tonight.
I open my car door and hold my bruised hand tentatively as I push through the front door to the Grill. I had seen a “Help Wanted,” sign here the other day and if I hopefully survive the night I’ll need a job for the summer. Not being a trust fund baby really sucks ass sometimes.
Matt Donovan sends me a warm smile as I walk past him. I'd never really talked to the guy other than the few times in class where he’d ask to borrow a pencil or if I could help him with some math equation, but he always seemed sweet. Unlike the stupid jock stereotype, I’ve gotten used to seeing in this town. After being told by Elena what happened to his sister and that now he lives by himself as a 17-year-old because his mom’s a deadbeat, I feel bad for the guy.
I let out a low groan as I stop my walk towards the bar which is currently occupied by the demon overlord himself. I debate to myself if I should just turn around, but a hand on my shoulder shocks me.
Ric stands there with his hands raised up in apology, “My bad Y/N. Didn’t mean to scare you. Just wanted to check on you and see how you’re doing.”
I look at Ric and sigh, “I’m just glad you’re you again.”
Ric nods his head in agreement, “Ya, me too. I didn’t hurt you while I was Klaus right?”
I shake my head, “No Ric, and even if you did it wouldn’t have been your fault. You had no control over yourself.”
Ric sends me a warm smile and nods, “I feel kind of violated, to be honest.”
I snort at his joke, “I don’t blame you.”
“I need a drink,” Ric says as he walks with me up towards the bar and my knuckles start to burn as I stare at the hair on the back of Demon’s head.
“I’ll have the same as him,” Ric says to the waiter as he sits on Damon’s right and I sit down on his left. The waiter then looks at me for my drink order, “A Shirley Temple, please. And a job application?”
The waiter, a half-decent-looking man, smirks as he pulls out a pad of papers from behind the bar and hands them to me before going back to making drinks.
“Job searching, Pukey,” Damon asks from beside me and I stare forward not looking at him.
“Ric,” I call to him and he turns to look at me, “If Damon’s here who do you think is guarding the gates of hell?”
Rics snorts out a deep laugh and I can see Damon scowling from beside me. The waiter comes back and gives Ric his bourbon and me my Shirley Temple. I accidentally grab it with my injured hand and try to cover the hiss I let out, with a cough.
“How’s your hand,” Damon asks from next to me. I’m surprised that his voice doesn’t sound completely sarcastic.
I turn and glare at him, “How’s your face?”
Damon sends me a smirk and gestures to his unmarked face, “Perfect.”
I roll my eyes and take a sip of my Shirley Temple ignoring whatever the two men next to me are talking about. That is until a voice that has my heart doing a fucking backflip in my chest calls from behind us.
“Gentlemen? Why so glum,” A deep British voice asks and I could’ve sworn goosebumps went up my arms at the sound. What the fuck?
All three of us turn to match the voice to the face and…Holy shit.
A tall dark-blond man stands about a foot length from me. At this distance, I can see the different shades of blue in his eyes and the small freckles that decorate his perfect nose.
I hear Damon groan from behind me and I’m not sure why as I’m too busy ogling the pretty man before me.
“Klaus, I presume.”
I blink. And then I blink again. And then once more as I’m frozen staring at Klaus. The Shirley Temple in my hands starts to shake as I can’t take my eyes off the man.
“In the flesh. Thanks for the loner, mate,” Klaus smirks at Ric and if I wasn’t in total shock right now I’d defend him. But the man I’ve thought of killing for the past week is standing right in front of me and I was counting how many fucking freckles I could see on his goddamned nose. There’s thirteen.
Shut tf up Y/n?!
Klaus hasn’t looked my way once and although I should be glad about that a part of my lower stomach drops at the fact.
Damon stands from his seat and goes to face the man, “Any reason you stopped by to say hi?”
“I’m told you and your brother fancy my doppelganger. Just thought I’d remind you not to do anything you’ll regret,” Klaus’ warning doesn’t seem to sway Damon as the ladder lets out a laugh.
“Thanks for the advice. I don’t supposed I could talk you into a postponement by any chance, huh?”
Klaus lets out a chuckle and I swear my heart just skipped a beat. What the fuck Y/n?!?!??
“You are kidding,” Klaus asks and then turns to Ric, “He is kidding, right?”
“No, not really.”
“I mean, come on, what’s one month in the whole grand scheme of things,” Damon asks and I realize that he’s doing this because he doesn’t want Elena to die with vampire blood in her system.
“Ya, I mean one month is like,” I pretend to count on my fingers, “Like thirty days. I don’t see why you can’t wait that long. You’ve already waited over a thousand years, what’s thirty days?”
I ask the man and this finally has Klaus acknowledging my presence. But honestly, from the way he’s looking at me, I wish I would’ve kept quiet. His eyebrows are drawn together and his lips curve upwards into what I hope isn’t a snarl. Damon must’ve noticed the look too because he moves in front of me blocking me from Klaus’ vision and him from mine.
“Let me be clear,” I hear Klaus’ deep voice say, “I have my vampire, I have my werewolf. I have everything I need. The ritual will happen tonight. So if you want to live to see tomorrow don’t screw it up.”
I catch sight of Klaus’ back as he strolls away.
“Would I be a bad person to say I kind of hope his werewolf was the Jules’ chick,” I see Ric shoot me an “Are you serious” look and I shrug, “Hey, she was the one who tortured me. I still got the little knife scare on my leg to prove it.”
Damon doesn’t say anything as he sits back down and sighs.
“You’re gonna screw it up, aren’t you?”
“You think if I took his werewolf out of the equation she might…get over the fact that I tried to turn her into a vampire?”
“Nope,” I say popping the p.
“I think it won’t matter, because you’ll be dead.”
“But without the werewolf he can’t preform the ritual tonight which means I would have bought her one month before the next full moon.”
Ric shakes his head, “But you’ll still be dead.”
Damon leans into him, “Are you gonna help me or what?”
Ric looks at him for a moment, “What do you want me to do?”
I slurp up the rest of my drink, throw a five onto the counter, and jump up as the two men next to me watch me wearily.
“Alright gentlemen, dream team time!”
Ric raises an eyebrow while Damon shoots me a look of disgust, “I don’t know what the hell that was, but you’re not coming along.”
I frown as I grab my application and follow behind the two men, “Why the hell not? I want to help.”
Damon whips around to me, “Look kid, not happening. There’s already too much shit going down and I can’t be babysitting you, making sure you don’t get killed on my watch. So go back home and we’ll see you tonight. Capiche?”
Damon turns back around and walks to his car. Ric sends me one last smile and a shrug of his shoulders before following behind. I watch the two men drive off and I sigh as I stand in the middle of the parking lot. Anger and sadness building in me, when I realize just how useless I truly am.
—
I try to give Elijah a smile as he opens the SUV door for me. But with the mood I’m in I think the smile comes out more like a frown than anything else. Elijah must notice this too as he reaches his hand out for me to take. I debate it for a moment, 1. Not being a big fan of PDA, and 2. Stefan and Ric are with us and I don’t want them to be angry with me. But then I remember that my best friend is going to die tonight so a little PDA isn’t that huge in the grand scheme of things.
Elijah seems elated as I place my hand in his and he guides Stefan and I through the woods toward the creepy ass witch house where Bonnie, Jeremy, and Ric are.
“The sacrifice is completed in stages as the full moon sets,” Elijah explains to us. I feel his hand squeeze mine in comfort and I squeeze his back, “First the werewolf is killed, then the vampire’ and finally the doppelganger. Once Elena dies, the curse will be broken. Klaus will become a hybrid.”
Stefan comes to walk next to us. His eyes go down to Elijah and I’s intertwined hands briefly before looking back up to me. When I send him a weary smile, he sends me a small one in return calming down my nerves.
“So when do we attack,” Ric asks from behind us.
“Elena’s death will activate his dormant werewolf side. He’ll be vulnerable during the transformation. That’s when Bonnie comes in.”
“And you’re sure Bonnie will survive this,” Stefan asks and I’m thankful at least one of the Salvatore brothers has a heart.
“If she can deliver him to the brink of death I’ll finish the job myself.”
Stefan and Ric nod.
“Could I talk to Elijah for a moment,” I ask the two men who share a look before nodding and moving towards the house.
Elijah turns towards me, “What is wrong, Elskan?”
“Are you going to be able to do it?”
Elijah frowns and shakes his head, “What do you mean?”
“Elijah you’re going to be killing your brother. I know siblings are a pain in the ass,” I think back to Theo and thank whatever higher being is out there that he left town this week, “but even when you hate them…you still love them. I’m not judging you for what you have to do. I’m just asking, are you ready for what you’re about to do?”
Elijah’s face is solemn as he processes what I asked, “Klaus wasn’t my only sibling,” I frown as he continues, “There once was a time when we were all together. But Klaus ruined that when he dumped their bodies in the middle of the Pacific.”
I let out a strangled gasp at Elijah’s confession. His pain evident on his face.
“Elijah…I didn’t know. Why didn’t you tell me?”
Elijah steps forward and holds the side of my face with his free hand, “You’re so good. So…pure. I didn’t want to strangle out the light you have inside you with my demons.”
“Elijah, you’re not the only one with skeletons in their closet. Trust me. But I want you to be honest with me. I need you to be. If this,” I gesture between us, “whatever this is. Is going to work. I’d never judge you. I know sometimes I can be a lot but that doesn’t mean I don’t anything but happiness for you. I don’t know what this means but you make me feel something I’d never felt with another human being.”
Elijah stares at me and something in his eyes tugs at my chest, “What is that?”
“Safe. You make me feel safe, Elijah. And I know I’m not some supernatural immortal and I can’t throw a punch to save my life. But, I want to make you feel that way too. However, I can.”
I start to get embarrassed as Elijah stares at me silently and I really wish I would’ve just kept my mouth closed.
“ᛁ ᚹᚨᛚᛚ ᛚᛟᚡᛖ ᛇᚢ ᚢᚾᛏᛁᛚ ᚦᛖ ᛋᚢᚾ ᛖᛗᛈᛚᛟᛞᛖᛋ, ᚦᛖ ᛟᚲᛖᚨᚾᛋ ᛞᚱᛁ ᚢᛈ, ᚺᚢᛗᚨᚾ ᛚᛁᚠᛖ ᚺᚨᛋ ᛚᛟᚾᚷ ᛋᛖᚾᚲᛖ ᚷᛟᚾᛖ ᚨᚾᛞ ᛁ ᚨᛗ ᚾᛟᛏᚺᛁᚾᚷ ᛒᚢᛏ ᛗᚣ ᛋᛟᚢᛚ. ᛒᚢᛏ ᛖᚡᛖᚾ ᛏᚺᛖᚾ ᛁ ᚹᛁᛚᛚ ᛋᛏᛁᛚᛚ ᛒᛖᛚᛟᚾᚷ ᛏᛟ ᚢ. ᛖᚡᛖᚱᚢᛏᚦᛁᚾᚷ ᛁ ᚨᛗ ᛁᛊ ᚢ,” Elijah says in some old language I can’t place.
“What exactly did you just say to me,” I ask, expecting the worst.
Elijah smiles and places a kiss on my temple, “I feel safe with you as well, Elskan.”
“I’m going now,” Stefan interrupts us and I move away from Elijah shocked.
The sense of warmth and peace I just had completely washed away as soon as those words left Stefan’s mouth.
“You should get inside Y/N. Bonnie needs you,” Stefan says to me making me frown. But I nod as I walk through the threshold of the house. Elijah follows me as I stand next to Ric. After a moment Bonnie and Damon walk up the basement stairs and out the front door. I frown as Ric and I follow them and Elijah squeezes my hand once more before dropping it as he passes through the threshold. Ric and I are pushed back though.
“What the hell?”
Ric yells from next to me, “Bonnie! What is this?”
Bonnie turns back towards us, “I can’t put anyone else at risk. I’m sorry.”
“You can’t do this! What if he goes after Jenna,” Ric asks angry.
“Jenna safe locked in at the Salvatore’s.”
“Damon?”
Damon sends us a look, “Sorry buddy. She’s right.”
I look to Elijah for help but from the look on his face he doesn’t seem surprised.
“You knew.”
Elijah turns to me one last time, “I meant what I said about protecting you. If I have to kill my brother to do that, I will. I’m sorry, Elskan. I will see you soon.”
I watch silently, as he turns his back on me and disappears into the woods. So much for trust.
—-
I watch as my history teacher paces in front of me. Jeremy’s unconscious body lay on the couch next to me and Elena's estranged bald father who looks like Charlie Brown watches us wearily. If you had told me I’d be in this situation a month ago I would’ve called you crazy and set up an appointment for you with my therapist mother. But here I am. Yippee.
I stand up, and both of the grown men watch me, “Just using the bathroom. Wait…Does this place even have a bathroom,” I ask but groan when I get no answer. I’m about to make my way out of the room when a piercing pain slices through my chest.
It only takes one scream from my lips before Ric is at my side. His mouth is moving but the sheer pain I’m experiencing makes it so I can’t process his words. I watch with teary eyes and sobs coming out of my mouth as Ric lifts his hand from my chest and his eyes widen. The crimson liquid coating his hand is the last thing I see before the world goes black.
—
3rd Person POV-
Bonnie screams out her spell as she crushes Klaus’s body. Fire burns around them as the once powerful Original lay in agonising pain. From the shadows, Elijah stalks towards his younger brother.
Elijah stands above him. A mask of anger covers his face as he leans down to stare at the man he once called a brother and a friend.
“Elijah?”
Klaus stares up at the man he once saw as his protector, and for the first time in centuries, Klaus feels true fear.
“Hello, brother.”
Stefan and Bonnie watch from afar as Elijah plunges his arm into his brother’s chest. Wrapping his hand around his still-beating heart.
“In the name of our family…Niklaus…”
“I didn’t bury them at sea,” Klaus’ desperate voice halts Elijah momentarily before shaking off what he believes to be a trick.
“I know about Y/n,” Those four words have Elijah pausing, “I know what she is to you. And I know she's the same to me.”
The hand that was once clenched around Klaus’ heart slacks as Elijah stares at his brother in horror.
“You’re lying,” Elijah snarls.
Klaus shakes his head, “I wish I was, brother. But I’m not. And if you kill me what do you think will happen to her. Are you really going to take that risk?”
Elijah’s once cool face breaks and turns into one of horror as he looks at his hand that is in his brother’s chest.
Stefan noticing this lapse of judgement speaks up, “Elijah, don’t listen to him.”
“Elijah,” Klaus says, “Think of her.”
“Do it and I’ll take you both out,” The Bennet witch threatens.
Elijah looks up to her, “You’ll die.”
“I don’t care.”
Stefan and Bonnie watch in horror as Elijah speeds himself and his brother out of the flames and into the night, leaving only silence and heartbreak.
—
“Why are we going to this again,” My brother asks from the hallway outside my room as I fix my black dress in my mirror. My hands freeze for a moment as they land on the spot on my chest that was bleeding just the night before.
-Flashback-
I woke with a gasp and before I could get a second to breathe I felt someone grasp my shoulders into a hug.
“You’ve really got to stop freaking me out like this,” A soft voice says into my ear.
I pull back and my eyes widen to see Elena with glossy eyes staring back at me.
I shake my head confused, “What happened? Did the ritual happen? Who died? Are you a…,” I pause before finishing my last question.
Elena sends me a smile and shakes her head, “They found another way.”
I feel a smile break out onto my face and I go to sit up to hug her but a sharp pain in my chest stops me.
“Don’t move ok. Just lay still,” Elena coaxes me back onto the coach I’m lying on.
“What happened?”
-End of Flashback-
In Elena and Ric’s spark notes version of the night, about 20 minutes after Stefan, Bonnie, and, Elijah left for the ritual I fell down to the ground in pain, screaming and yelling, and when Ric went to check on me I had blood spilling from my chest. Right above where my heart is. Ric said there was so much blood he couldn’t find where it was coming from but after holding pressure on it for another ten minutes the bleeding had stopped and when he moved his hands from my chest I had no wounds that showed I had been wounded.
Alaric told me he was surprised that I was still breathing after losing the blood that I did. He also told me that while I was unconscious he found Damon slipping me some of my blood. And if I wasn’t as sore as I was I’d have bitched him out. I’ll just put that on the back burner for now. As well as figuring out what the hell is wrong with me. Bonnie said she couldn’t feel any spells or curses on me so at least that’s a plus. I guess. Also, I haven’t seen Elijah in over a day. Honestly, I don’t know if I could face him right now anyway. I’m pissed that he betrayed us, but there’s a part of me that is happy he didn’t kill his brother. A part I’m not telling the public because right now I’m off to a funeral for Elena’s dad who did die.
Elena told me he had Bonnie do some spell that switched his life for hers. And as much as I disliked the guy, I got to give it to him he showed up in the end. RIP Charlie Brown.
“We’re going because Elena’s my friend and her dad died, Theo. Try to not be an asshole for the afternoon please,” I say as I meet my brother at the front door of our house. My mother and he came back early last night because she had to get home for some work thing. Typical. But that also means I get to be with Theo for the day and after almost dying yesterday, I realized that I wouldn’t have gotten the chance to say goodbye to him, and today could’ve been my funeral he’d be going to. A chill runs down my spine at the thought and I fight back a set of tears.
“Okay, I promise. I’m sorry,” Theo says as he notices a tear fall down my face.
I smile at my little brother and pull him into a hug.
“I knew you missed me,” I can hear the smirk in his voice as I laugh into his suit jacket.
“Ya, whatever loser let’s go.”
—
I watch with tear-filled eyes as Elena places a rose on her biological father’s grave and then walks over to her parent's matching graves and places roses on them. Theo stands next to me with a solemn expression on his face, Jeremy is next to him, Bonnie, Caroline, and Tyler stand behind us, and Jenna is on my left as she holds Ric’s hand. I turn to look over my shoulder and I catch Damon’s eye as he stands against a tree. And for the first time ever I almost swore he smiled at me. Damn, maybe he’s dying too.
—
“I’ll be in the car,” Theo says to me and begins to walk away but not before bringing Jeremy in for a bro hug. I watch as my brother safely gets to the car and then I begin to walk over to Elena but see her already crowded with our friends. My gaze goes towards Damon who stands facing the graveyard and I frown.
“I have a bone to pick with you. You can’t just go and put blood into people’s mouths while they’re-” I say as I approach him.
“I’m happy you’re ok, Y/N.”
Damon’s interruption and the sincerity in his voice make me halt as I approach him.
“Wait…I think I’m hallucinating because I could’ve sworn you just called me by my actual name,” I walk up to him and jokingly smirk, “You dying or something?”
“Tyler Lockwood bit me.”
Oh. Fuck.
Translation-
“I will love you until the sun explodes, the oceans dry up, human life has long since gone and I am nothing but my soul. But even then I will still belong to you. Everything I am is you.”
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