#it’s one thing to post this dumbass shit but to post it IN the tag???
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“A little progress is better than none!!! Vote blue anyways <3!!!!!” I’m going to start beating these people with a baseball bat I swear to god
#the ‘progress’ in question:#abortion bans. anti trans bills all over the place#book bans every fucking day it feels like#that goddamn wall is still being built#and yeah you know the fucking GENOCIDE????#what fucking progress are you TALKING ABOUT???#I don’t want to hear shit about progress when there IS NO PROGRESS#what does that progress even matter to thousands and thousands of people who are dying???#what does it matter to those who are losing their families???#it’s one thing to post this dumbass shit but to post it IN the tag???#it’s so fucking time deaf oh my god#I’m making my own dumbass post because I’m seconds away from losing my mind#on every fucking post I see like this#how stupid can you be#‘well he’s not the other guy’ is not good enough anymore#it never should’ve been good enough#I have a feeling this chuckle fuck in charge is going to finally pull through and make good#on at least one of his promises#in a desperate attempt to win people back over#and it’s going to fucking work because people are too selfish#to care how it’ll effect anyone other than themselves
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𝐈'𝐦 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐤𝐢𝐝 | 𝐈𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢 𝐔𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐡𝐚
It echoed through miles, his screams.
He kept on screaming for God knows how long.
The sky weeped, just like him. Maybe because unlike anyone else, it understood him.
The sky was dark with no stars illuminating the void. Just like his heart.
He finally broke down. But it wouldn't last for long.
He couldn't afford it. He had a duty. He didn't have the luxury to spend time for himself.
But still, one time won't hurt right? He could scream and cry and yell everything that's wrong, everything he wants, everything that hurts him.
No one was here. He couldn't sense anyone around him.
He was a prodigy, used to be an ANBU and now a member of the most dangerous criminal organization.
He trusted his senses.
But, ah, ‘prodigy’. He hated that word with passion.
Had he not been a prodigy and just some average kid everyone would have left him alone, let him be, given up on him, would have no expectations.
That would be so nice. He loved the idea. What a bliss.
He just wanted to spend time under the shade of the big green Hashirama trees that felt like they were giving a hug everytime he used to sit underneath it.
Hug he needed a hug. No, he needed lots of hugs.
He just wanted to pet stray cats and even adopt some… or all of them.
He just wanted to pick fresh, red, juicy tomatoes for his little brother. He just wanted to spend time with him. Laughing, joking, sparring together. With each other. Not against.
He just wanted to eat dango with Shisui. He just wanted to hang out with him. Hear about all the stories he has from different villages and lands, different cultures of every out of village missions he went to. Shisui always brought souvenirs from there.
He just wanted to try making different dishes and cuisines.
He just wanted to paint the beautiful sceneries he witnessed during missions, the vivid and abstract dreams he used to have and
He didn't want to kill his whole clan, traumatize his brother, take his family away, betray him, make him hate his elder brother, become a rogue nin and kill innocent people.
He was just a teenager.
#i have NO idea why i never posted this#my dumbass either forgot#or i was sure no one would be interested in a singular itachi piece#that to a poem#and if i have#well then i don't remember and i can't find it on my blog either#i really have to start tagging things right i can't find shit on here#itachi#itachi uchiha#poem#sasuke uchiha#shisui uchiha#naruto
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all The Crown fans love to do here is complain about The Crown and how inaccurate The Crown is and how disappointing The Crown is. maybe you should stop watching The Crown and just leave it alone. have you considered that it is not required of you to watch The Crown? do you know that you do not have to engage with The Crown?
#perhaps i should just unfollow the tag lmao#i’m just genuinely so exhausted. no fandom has ever been more whiney or irritating#‘oh no the historical drama is inaccurate’ yeah no shit dumbass. they want views ! not accuracy !#literally every post in the tag these days is just spouting off how inaccurate and bad the recent seasons have been and i’m TIRED OF IT#i’m just in general sick of negativity in the tag of the thing one is being negative about#don’t you have anything better to do with your time than shit on things? that’s what the bathroom is for#the crown#lyd says things
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Talkin' about Russia 'cause Nobody Wants To
So...why the railroad?
Forced labor was extremely common in Soviet prisons. Their railroad system at the time of the 80s was one of the most utilized in the world. That Hopper's prison would be working on a railroad is not unrealistic in the slightest. But why is this prison (a secret prison, mind you) working on a railroad? Why is there a railroad located right by a secret prison? A secret prison devoted to secret research related to a secret dimension?
Well.
Where'd all this shit come from? How are they transporting all of the demogorgons here? How did they acquire them to begin with? Where did they acquire them?
And where the fuck is this?
This is from the first scene of season 3, when Alexei and co are trying to open the gate in Russia. We see his superiors go outside and then a shot of the Russian flag, but there's no location cue popping up on screen to let us know where specifically this is in Russia. Alexei tells us later that they moved the operation to Hawkins because the gate had already been opened and the barrier was therefore weaker.
So what happened to the lab in Russia? What else is going on at this huge base? Why is the research in Russia with the demogorgons and the particles now taking place at a secret prison in Kamchatka?
Kamchatka is a peninsula, FYI. Not a town.
So it's completely possible that the wumbo base featured in the season 3 premier is, in fact, also in Kamchatka. Or, if not, is at least reachable by rail.
I feel like it's safe to assume that something is still happening at that base. Because you cannot possibly convince me that they relocated from aforementioned base here:
Not a chance. As a relocation, this makes no sense at all. As a second operation, however, absolutely. We know that one of the reasons the demogorgons are at the prison is to keep them fed and (in Hopper's words) "entertained." We also see them being studied.
That means the location at the prison is convenient to provide fodder/dinner while the scientists study the creatures. But the Russians never got the gate in Hawkins all the way open, so they can't have taken the demogorgons from there. We also don't know how the Russians found out about the UD in the first place, motivating them to seek to open a gate.
This is the machine in Suzie, Do You Copy? It malfunctioned and damaged all the equipment in the room, including itself. The likelihood of the Russians dismantling the machine, transporting the parts to Indiana, and rebuilding the machine with those same damaged parts seems slim. So perhaps while Alexei's team was rebuilding a new machine in Hawkins, another team was repairing this one here. Because we still have a crack in the world.
Not a gate, but a crack is there. Season 3 takes place a year after this. Season 4 takes place eight months after that. After the machine at Starcourt was destroyed, you cannot convince me they gave up. If they had been working on BOTH machines in the year before the "mall fire," and then spent another eight months after that on this one, it is completely possible they managed to open it enough to get a demogorgon or particles through.
Here's a theory I'm just chucking out there. What if the Russian gate doesn't lead to the Upside Down?
What if it leads to Dimension X? Why give them the same color scheme? And show us explicitly that there are demodogs in Dimension X?
Another question: who is them?
It's implied that the answer is the demogorgons. But this is never outright stated. The prison officer dies before he's able to answer the question (typical) and then they look at the cameras and go "oh them of course!" But what if it wasn't the demogorgons? Or what if it was but killing them didn't kill the particles? Could there be Flayed in Russia? Are the particles even from the same place as the demogorgons?
If the demogorgons are from the Russian gate and the particles are from the Hawkins gate, the particles entering the demogorgons would connect them to the UD hive mind where before they would not have been, therefore allowing Murray's flamethrower extravaganza to affect Vecna, the demobats, and the vines in the UD Creel House. Maybe the particles were essential in order to allow this success while still allowing the demogorgons to be from another dimension and therefore a separate hive mind.
And MAYBE I'm full of shit. But I find the coloring of Dimension X and the demotanks extremely suspicious.
#stranger things theory#stranger things Russian storyline which is obviously not a tag because no one gives a shit about the Russian storyline RIP#murray bauman#the upside down#dimension x#my dumbass post
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imsoo normal about guys byw
#sprry this is the start of my downfall im actually going to theow up and vomit and die#fronting daily actually sucks!and i have no restraint on my curiiusity and i have to figure shit out and i literally want to die#cause like i found out shit i didnt want to and its entirely my fault too bro i cant even be upset cause i went looking for it ughhh#i should be allowed to die afterschool so i dont have to feel anything else tbh thatd be a pleasure great thing whwatever#this is genuinelky the repeat of my downfall again literally september all over again and its just march jesus fucking fhrist bro need todi#the nervous system is so dumb what is ooottfvgvsh or whagevr i hate that dumbass acronym i hate healrhcare#serenity save me 🙏 save me serenity 🙏 come home#everyone keeps sayng that but qith donald trump#anyway back to me i need to scream and not just to serenity cause i feel bad🤭 no emojis are tood enougu anymore bro im going to kms#killing myself so fucking hard like a vampire driving a stake through his heart sort of shit ykwim like a siren drowning ro sokething poeti#save me sid 🙏 sid save me actually hed laugh at me for hthis lowkey which is soo deserved cause real bro why am i breaking down at midnight#on a dchool day too bro again and again i dont want to go to mf schooll and be obsessed w k. hes fine but i genuinely cant do my work#lowkey would iet be weird to talk to my ex ab my relationship with him cause like yea i miss him ykwim and i need closure but i got a crush#cause like on one hand its like i was the one who brokenup ykwim like even if the circumstances werewei4d whatever its like why would i hav#the right to even bring it up and i alr crushed on a new guy and like ignoring the uguult i do like him ughh broni want to kms#i love love i just dont love lvoe for myself cause ugh bro i hare one guy idc ab his crushes but he made me hear ab them lke idc idek him#sorry u had a bad experience w bi girls like idk what u want me to say ??? surprise me too ??? tff ugh i hate love girls#i need a gf but the thoigjt of liking a girl genuinely deeply scares me to my core cause i like girls but ppl dont like that i do ykwim#all mu friends are fucking gay bro idek why im so worried ab liking girls like who is there to disappoint but myself and my entire family#noo pressure qt all being oldest and queerest like ok yeah its midnight happy new years. i need this blanket tobsuffocste me#sleep wrappedup alr like a borito burito i dek and its not enoughh i need a soul crushing embrafe to sleep#ok im done i got post vent clarity i need to sleep#post#erics tag#delete later#serenity needs this as a ref in the morning#i beed my mom to cry to but j cant tell her any of this id rather be eaten alive by bugsbro and if i just cry to her without a reason#shell fs go througj my phone and fimd out why anyway so wjats the pointtt my god i tqlk too much and vent too much#gota flair forbthe dramatics ivguess mb
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#lorisys#im not alone in thinking this btw <3 <3 i saw several diagnosed DID systems talk about this one of which identifies also as a tulpamancer.#so miss me with that dumbass gatekeepy shit.#sysmeds will literally take real things that happen to diagnosed systems and say you cant do that.#im sorry but just bc YOU havent split alters on purpose doesnt mean nobody can.#byeee#i removed it the post from the tag but now i literally dont know how to tag it so that ppl who want to avoid discourse can.#idk how to use tumblrs tagging system#its so awful wtf
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losing my mind a little
#sometimes hearing other people's opinions of your fav stuff is wonderful#sometimes you want to bash your head into a wall and cry#i wish i wasn't so easily influenced by other people's opinions y'know?#like my brain just sees it and immediately says whatever i think is wrong#its so fucking annoying#im one of those people that just obsesses over one simple thing#im not a 'learn everything i possibly can about it' person#when im fixated on smth that doesn't mean i want to know everything about it#but i end up feeling like shit because most fandom people i have seen are like that#i just enjoy things that fuel my overactive imagination!#anything that provides daydreams is my favourite!#but i just can't commit to something as much#it's so weird bc irl i feel like im the one who's too much#but in fandom spaces i feel like im not enough#i don't have particularly strong opinions about anything#i feel like im too apathetic for fandoms but too invested for it to be considered a casual interest#where are my people who love writing fics and making aus but don't give a shit about canon accuracy and extended lore??#i think i just need to stop looking at the latest posts in tags#ive been on a mission to filter myself less and yet im always catching myself#double checking what everyone else thinks so i don't say anything different#i hate my dumbass brain lmao#it's like im a fish out of water everywhere#so many people ive heard suck ass at real life#but flourish on the internet#because they're surrounded with others like them#but no matter where i go i still feel wrong?#when i was younger i cared way less about appearing normal#i was fucking weird and proud of it#maybe a little too proud#but idk what the fuck happened
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yami ai [yandere] - Hot Yandere Singles Near You
synopsis: you click on a random pop-up ad and are visited by weird smiling man in suit.
genre: pure crack (like fr), fluff, tbh there's not really a plot
word count: 4.4k
warnings: implied stalking
Isn’t insomnia just the worst? Like, seriously? What’s the point of being a human being with antiquated thoughts and impressive cognitive and motor skills when your brain fights you on the most basic stuff. For example, like sleeping!!
You must’ve refreshed YouTube and Twitter over a thousand times. Over 8 billion people in the world and there’s no new content anywhere? You groaned and jumped back over onto Twitter, silently praying and pleading for something new to show up on your feed. Maybe a wacky billionaire got eaten by a mob of homeless people or maybe a news article about a Floridian doing something gross and outrageous and virtually impossible.
But nope. Nothing.
Not a single thing piqued your interest. You groaned again and looked at the time on your dimly lit phone. It was past 2 a.m. and you were bored out of your mind. You then lazily clicked on Google and sighed.
‘Maybe someone posted a new fanfic over something…’ you hoped. And even if there wasn’t a new fic uploaded you’ll just read the old ones you favorited. Perhaps reading something might put you to sleep.
As you were scrolling through your favorite ship tags, you were startled by a pop up ad covering up 90% of the screen and flashing emojis.
“Ugh… seriously?” you groaned. “They should make ad-blockers on phones for this shit.” You squinted at the bright lettering emanating from your phone even though it was at the lowest brightness setting.
⚠️(99+) Hot Yandere Singles NEAR YOU⚠️
Yandere’s…? Singles? Near me?
The pop-up ad had flashing peach, cherry, and eggplant emojis with a water splash emoji at the end to signify… well, you’re not sure what it was trying to signify. On the sides of the ad, it showed pictures of very gorgeous men and women, all striking suggestive poses. Underneath the title was a small summary that read. ‘These lonely desperate yanderes wanna meet you! They’ll most likely find you anyway, but wouldn’t you rather be the honey to a bee instead of a fly? Try it NOW for FREE!! No hookups! No catfishes! No sign ups!’ Then below that were a few empty boxes to fill out requiring your personal information.
"..."
Was this a porn ad?!
No way at 2:45 in the freaking morning did you just get a porn pop-up ad while googling mafia au fanfiction. This has to be some kind of joke. Maybe it was prank and someone was just fucking with you. And how and why would there be 99+ yanderes in your area?! You couldn’t be surrounded by that many psychos. Could you? Whatever the case may be, it was now past 2 a.m. and as the rule of life states ‘Nothing good happens after 2 a.m.’. You don’t know if it was the lack of sleep or just reckless curiosity, but you gave your shoulders a shrug and mumbled a ‘fuck it’ as you put in your information. Your name, number, gender, age, preferred sex, email, and mailing address. As you clicked submit and continued scrolling, you gave very little thought about how this would go down.
On one hand, the ad turns out to be real and you get a partner out of this. Or
You get quartered, stalked, doxxed, and murdered like the dumbass you are for putting your personal info into a sketchy porno-like pop-up on Google.
Or, it turns out to be a prank and some asshole sitting in a basement has a good laugh at you.
Meh. You’ll deal with it in the morning.
*****
You were jolted awake with the sound of rapid knocking coming from your front door. You groaned into your pillow as you tried to ignore the person desperately wanting your attention from outside your apartment. You finally got some sleep only for it to get interrupted. Only minutes and minutes of continued knocking without any signs of letting up, you decide to get up and shoo away whoever it was. You wearily grabbed your phone to check the time.
8:02 a.m.
You huffed as you stormed towards the front door.
“If this a fucking Jehova’s Witness, I swear to god…” you grumbled. You swung open the door and threw the person a harsh glare, only to be met with popping sounds as confetti flew in your face.
“Good morning, my dear darling~!! Are you ready to begin on the road to happiness and love?” the stranger shouted a far too happy tone for 8 in the morning.
You took a step back in shock, fully awake as you waved and dusted the confetti from your face and hair. You looked the strange man up and down. He was smiling ear to ear and wore an expensive looking suit to warm for the summer weather. A briefcase stood right beside him along with dozens of other party poppers and a white plastic bag filled with brown bottles with oddly enough no labels on them. You looked at the man’s face. He was surprisingly attractive and without a single flaw anywhere. His hair was jet black and shined a very prominent gloss. You were honestly kind of embarrassed to be seen by him when you looked like such a mess. The man let out a chuckle.
“Oh my.” he said, gently putting his hand over his mouth with vague concern. “I hope I didn’t startle you too much. I probably should’ve sent you an email notifying you of the time I was coming. I’m sorry that must’ve been a troubling awakening.”
You quirked your eyebrow and took another step back, grabbing onto the doorknob so that you could slam it right in his face if things got too weird.
“And… you are?”
“Oh my, oh my. Where are my manners? How careless of me to assume.” The man bowed with a curtsy. “I am the ‘Matchmaker’. My job is to pair two people with their fated soulmate and give each of my clients their happily ever after. It’s very nice to meet you, (Y/N) (L/N).”
You felt a chill crawl down your spine. How’d this weirdo know your name?! You tried to close the door as fast as you could, but the ‘Matchmaker’ was even faster. He clicked his tongue at you, his smile unchanging, but his eyes seemed to harden his gentle tone.
“My, how rude. Is that any way to treat a guest?” He let out another chuckle. “You’ll never find love that way.”
“H-How did you know my name?” you stuttered.
Again, another chuckle. What was so funny? “My dear~. You gave it to me.”
What the hell was he talking about? How could you have given this creep your name? Was he a stalker? A junkie? Noticing the confusion on your face, the man spoke up again.
“Oh my dear. Do you really not remember?” he asked, tilting his head in feign innocence. “You filled out an ad to meet singles in your area. And here I am, coming to fulfill that ad.”
You eased up on the tension you had on the door and tilted your head in surprised confusion. “That was a real ad?”
The man stood up tall and smiled earnestly again. “Of course. However, you are the first person to actually fill out that ad. Really, this is more of a celebration to both of us.”
Huh, so the pop-up ad was real.
Not a prank.
And now there’s a psycho standing at your front door promising you a partner from an actual yandere.
“I honestly thought it was a prank. I mean… yanderes? Isn’t that just an anime thing?”
“Oh, I assure you my darling.” he said with a snide smirk. “Yanderes are real. And when they heard about signing up, it was like tossing chicken in a sea of alligators. All clamoring to be the first person to take a bite.”
Okay, gross but kind of sweet.
“May I come in?”
“Huh?”
“Well, my dear. It would be easier to come in and talk through the process of how this goes instead of standing here.”
“Oh, um… Suuuree-”
“Great! My my darling~. What a lovely home. Very well decorated.” The man quickly strided into your house and made himself comfortable in your living room, looking as if he was analyzing every detail about your house.
Richard Chase would’ve loved your dumbass.
You shut the door and followed him into your own apartment and offered him a seat on your couch. Might as well, right? You’ve gone this far and you're still alive.
“Umm…” you hesitantly shifted from one foot to another. “Do you… um… want some coffee maybe? Or tea? Maybe a glass of water? If you haven;t eaten breakfast yet, I whip you up something.”
Yeah, sure. Feed the man with only a title for a name and waltzed right into your house after showing up after you put in your personal information into a random pop-up ad at 3 a.m. promising you a happy life with hot single yanderes in your area. You are the pinnacle of human genius. The apex of natural selection. The creme de la creme of common sense. Charles Darwin would be so impressed.
“How thoughtful. Just coffee would be fine. Thank you.”
After brewing a quick pot, you sat across from the man facing him heads on and gently slid him his steaming cup. After a while of taking little sips in weird silence, he spoke up again.
“Before we continue, I’d just like to say: Thank you so much for applying for this wonderful opportunity!! Not many people would click on an ad requiring doxxing information to meet their soulmates! Again, congrats on being our number one willing client!”
“Willing client?” you asked.
“Well, of course! For some reason, humans seem to really love the idea of a yandere until there’s one standing on their front porch!” he laughed.
“Humans? I’m sorry. Are you not human, Mr…?”
“Ah ah! No need for formalities! Just ‘The Matchmaker’ or simply ‘Matchmaker’.
“Oh, so… you don’t have a true name? Or is that just a title?”
“Oh darling~.” he sang sweetly. “That’s none of anyone’s fucking business, is it?”
Your eyes widened and let out a nervous chuckle. “Okay, got it! Just Matchmaker. Lovely name. Adore it. In fact, I love when strange mysterious men only give a title for a name.” What the hell does that even mean? You had no idea what you were saying anymore.
“Heh, smart cookie.” He winked. “Shall we begin?”
“Um, yeah, so… how does this work exactly?” you finally asked.
“Simple, my dear darling. Think of this as an ordinary matchmaking appointment. I have a stack of potential soulmates all ready to meet you. I have the same information about them that I also have of you. Each potential soulmate also has a picture so if you don’t really feel up to meeting face-to-face just yet you can look over the picture and see who captures your heart.”
“Face-to-face? So these guys have my picture too?” “Of course! And might I say, those pictures don’t do you justice. In all my years in this business, I’ve never seen such an obsession and overload of potential soulmates for just one person.”
You lightly blushed. “I-I don’t know about that… I barely got any sleep last night so I probably look like a zombie right now…”
“Au contraire, Darling. You look absolutely stunning. If I weren’t such a professional I would burn all these forms and claim you as my one and only~.”
You felt your entire face flush red as the Matchmaker pierced your soul with his longing gaze. It felt like he was staring into your very essence – like he could read you like a book. You nervously cleared your throat and shifted your eyes away, hoping to bring down your blush.
“S-So! Um… should we get started?” you stuttered, internally kicking yourself for being so easily flustered by a couple of smooth words. Ted Bundy would’ve had a field day with your dumbass.
“Ready whenever you are, my dear.” The Matchmaker set his briefcase on your coffee table and pulled out a single form and slid it over towards you. “Let’s start off with an easy one.”
You looked at the form along with the picture of a very attractive man paperclipped to the paper. According to the form, his name is Hamazawa Akita. He was in his early 20’s, had a varying array of hobbies from hiking to scuba diving, and was very much in love with you.
“Well, what do you think?”
“Hm, well, he’s very cute. And very active.”
“Would you like to meet him?”
“Um, sure… is there a number I could call or…?”
“No need! We can bring him in right now.” The Matchmaker snapped his fingers and you whipped your head towards the front door where Akita strolled in, all smiles. You looked back over the Matchmaker. “Did I not lock my door? Wait. More importantly, how’d he get here?!”
The Matchmaker smiled. “My dear, when you’re in this business you pick up a few tricks.” He then turned his attention towards Akita who now stood in the middle of the living room. “No. 1 would you like to introduce yourself?”
Akita stood tall and his eyes seemed to beam directly at you. “My name is Hamazawa Akita. Ever since I saw your picture I’ve dreamed about sweeping you off your feet and claiming you all to myself!”
“So, like 8 hours ago?”
“Yes!! But those hours feel like years when being away from you.”
“Hmm.”
“So, what do you think? Are you feeling the butterflies?”
You looked up Akita up and down and your face twisted as if you’re deciding on whether or not to buy a car or a piece of clothing.
“Um, to be honest my guy. I’m not feeling it.”
“Huh?”
“Excuse me, my darling?”
“Weeeelllll…. I mean, don’t get me wrong! You’re very attractive and your words are sweet, but I don’t think I believe any of it. Like, you just admitted to wanting me all to yourself only 8 hours ago, but I don’t really feel anything. Not even a shiver.”
The Matchmaker and Akita both looked at each other like they weren’t really expecting that. With a quick wave of his hand, Akita slumped his shoulders and headed towards your front door. You shouted out an apology as the dejected suitor walked out.
“Well, I didn’t expect that. I don’t normally get such competent clients. At least those that get past kicking and screaming.” The Matchmaker grinned. You shrugged.
“I guess I just know what I like. All the anime I’ve watched kind of gives you that high standard of what makes a yandere a real yandere, y’know?”
He nodded. “I cannot agree more. Well, we have plenty more where that came from. Shall we continue?”
*****
Papers were strewn across your coffee table in an unorganized fashion as both you and your estranged guest were tired beyond belief. You had no idea how many hours had passed nor how many guests were in and out of your apartment. You’re honestly surprised none of your neighbors complained or called the police. Your apartment would’ve looked like a clown car if anyone had been watching from the outside. You honestly lost count after No. 256. You let out another yawn and laid on your side trying your best to keep your eyes open. Maybe 2 hours of sleep wasn’t enough for the multiple interviews you had to conduct today. Maybe your 9th grade biology teacher was right. Maybe you are going to die alone. A weary sigh brought you from your thoughts.
“My, my. You are definitely the most high standard client I’ve ever had. I didn’t think we’d get to the triple digits in just one day.”
You also sighed and sat up in your seat. “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just… All these guys are cute and all, but they’re all lacking something. They’re either too forceful or not forceful enough. Too wimpy or too strong. Or too obsessed or just incredibly so lovesick that I feel like they’d fall in love with just about anyone who’d be willing. Ugh, why can’t this be simpler like adopting an animal?” You groaned. You also hadn’t thought this would take this long. You didn’t really think of yourself as having high standards until today. Until today, you’d be happy with anyone close to you in age and with a heartbeat. Who knew picking out a yandere soulmate would be so challenging. And who knew that there’d be so many willing participants! The Matchmaker reached into his briefcase and pulled another stack of forms and slid them over to you. There must be at least over a hundred papers in front of you. How did he have so many?!
“How about we switch things up, hm? You’ll look over the papers and when you see someone that catches your eye, I’ll bring him in.” He made it sound like you were adopting a dog or a cat. But if this made it go any faster, you were willing to try.
After about 3 more stacks of papers, you were starting to lose hope and patience. When you got to the last few papers, you stopped dead in your tracks. Woah baby!
“Woah baby!” you exclaimed.
“Did you find someone you like?” The Matchmaker asked hopefully.
“Oh yeah. This guy.” You showed him the paper. He furrowed his brows a little.
“Are you sure? I don’t think I remember this man. His name and face don’t seem familiar.”
“Really? Maybe he’s a late entry or something?”
Matchmaker stroked his chin in thought. “I’ll go check it out. Be right back, dear. I’m very sorry for this inconvenience.”
You waved off his apology with a smile and he left your apartment. You then leaned back with a groan. You just wanted to find your ‘soulmate’ or whatever and move on with this day. You closed your eyes for a second and waited patiently for Matchmaker to come back.
Tap tap tap
Just like deja vu, you were awoken by rapid knocking. Except this time it wasn’t coming from your front door.
Tap tap tap tap
It sounds like it’s coming from… your window?
Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap
You quickly got up and walked towards your window and opened it.
“Woah!” You jumped back a little as you were met face to face with the man that you had picked out and that the Matchmaker went to go find.
‘Wow… he’s even cuter in person!!’
He let out a delicious chuckle and gave you a charming smile.
“I didn’t mean to scare you, darling~. Hehe, though I think that fear in your eyes was worth it. So adorable~.” For the second time today, a complete weirdo stranger has made you blush. Wait…
“Wait! I don’t have a balcony and I’m on the third floor. How’d you-?” You peeked over the window to see if he was pulling a Criss Angel.
“I have incredible grip strength~.” he winked.
“Oooh I’m sure~.” you swooned. For a weirdo, he was a smooth talking weirdo.
“Oh, I got these for you, sweetheart~.” He pulled himself up and sat on your windowsill and pulled out a bouquet of roughly cut flowers from behind him. You gasped and grabbed them, giving them a smell.
“These are my favorite!! How did you know? I don’t think that was one of the pieces of info required for the Matchmaker.” you asked.
The stranger chuckled. “Easy. I never filled out that stupid application.”
You looked up from your flowers and titled your head like a confused puppy.
“I already know everything about you. I don’t need a stupid piece of paper to tell me what I already know about you. Like, how I know that you have secret sweets hidden all throughout your room. Or that whenever you have a good day you love to sing Stray Kids.”
He inched closer to you as you backed up further into the room.
“You won’t eat frozen pizza, but every so often you eat a lobster roll from a food truck from Gary on Main St.. You have life destroying evidence of your boss that you’re planning on using on your last day. You’ve seen the Barbie movie 5 times. And…”
You felt your legs hit the couch and tried to keep yourself from falling onto your back like a defenseless turtle.
“Your favorite anime is… Dar-” You quickly covered the stranger’s mouth with a furious blush.
“I only watch it ironically!! I don’t love it! It’s not my favorite!” you quickly clarified. The gravity of the situation was made perfectly clear after that. This man really knew all about you. Honestly, you’re so loud that you’re pretty sure that people on the ground outside could hear you singing. And you don’t really pay attention to your surroundings so it's easy for someone to know that you eat from a food truck every other week at specific times. But, knowing your favorite secretly watched anime?
“W-Who… are you?” you stuttered. You’re pretty sure you already knew the answer.
He laughed and you felt his lips brush against your fingers. You blushed and tried to pull back, only to be stopped by his hands.
“Sweetie~. You already know who I am.” He grabbed the paper from the stack and put it next to his face. “See? I’m Yami Ai. Your soulmate.”
Before you could even process what was happening, you were gently pushed onto the couch with Yami hovering over you holding your hands beside your head. You couldn’t stop the blush erupting from your neck to your face. Your heart was beating way too fast and your stomach felt jumpy and queasy. Butterflies.
You cleared your throat. “Um… so, if you didn’t fill out a form then how come The Matchmaker had your profile and picture? And why didn’t you use the front door?”
Yami smirked and leaned in closer. “It’s pretty simple to pull off when your apartment does security checks on new guests entering the building.”
“But, my apartment doesn’t–” you stopped. “Ooooh… So you impersonated a security guard, slipped your profile and info into his briefcase, and were planning on showing up as one of the potential singles? That’s… convoluted. But, smart.” You shrugged. “And since you obviously knew which floor I was on and which window was mine, I assume you’ve been watching me for a while and were watching me last night when I couldn’t sleep?”
Yami laughed again. “You are so smart~. You really catch on quickly, don’t you?”
You shrugged again with a nervous smile. “W-Well, obviously not smart enough to not put in my personal info and have strange men come in and out of my apartment.”
Yami was quick to turn his gentle smile into a hard, harsh frown. His grip on your wrists grew tighter and you winced under the force he placed in you.
“You know, my darling. It’s partially my fault. If I hadn’t backed out and taken you that night, you’d never be in this situation. With those men eyeing you up and down like you were theirs. Having that smiling freak calling you ‘dear’ and ‘darling’ when only I can call you that. I was planning on getting rid of the competition, but you did that for me.”
Yami loosened his grip and lifted you up, staring into your eyes. You blushed again.
“Rejection after rejection. Some guys didn’t even get 2 words out before you turned away. Of course my darling would only want the most perfect man. Isn’t that right, darling~?”
“Hehehe~” you leaned in with a giggle. “You’re so sweet~.”
You are such a baby for flattery.
*****
“My dear darling, I’m so very sorry for the inconvenience. I didn’t mean to be gone for so long, but I could not find this person you–” Matchmaker explained, rushing in and stopping dead in his tracks when he saw both you and Yami, the man who left 30 minutes ago to go find, eating breakfast in the living room.
Sitting in his lap.
And feeding each other.
“Oh! Matchmaker!” you exclaimed, quickly swallowing your food. You didn’t notice Yami tightening his grip on your waist nor did you notice the cold glare and tense atmosphere enveloping the room. “Look who I found~.”
“I see…” he said hesitantly.
“He climbed up the building and came in through the window.”
“My~. How romantic~.” he sang. “So, I take it that you are satisfied with your soulmate? Or… do you wish to continue searching?” he asked teasingly. Before Yami could say anything, you quickly spoke again.
“Yep! I’m sure.” You ruffled Yami’s hair and nuzzled up against him. “I wouldn’t trade him for anyone else.” Yami hugged you closer to his chest as you giggled. “Plus, he makes the most amazing breakfast in the world, so extra points!” you cheered. You reached out towards the Matchmaker’s briefcase.
“Here you go! I put all the papers back in for you.”
Matchmaker quickly walked over and grabbed his briefcase along with your hand. “Well, my dear. It’s been an honor. You are truly the most remarkable and memorable client I have ever had.” he said with a bow and made his way towards the door. However, before leaving he chuckled and looked back at the both of you. “Although, it’s a shame,” he sighed. “Maybe if I had stayed, I would’ve snatched you up myself.”
And with a final loud laugh, The Matchmaker disappeared, but not before Yami stood up to lounge and attack the fleeting man like a guard dog. You snorted and caressed his face to calm him down. “Relax, Yami. He’s just joking.”
“Well, I hated his joke. Fuckin’ freak…” he grumbled. “And it’s Ai. You’re mine now. You should get used to calling each other by our first names.”
You smiled and leaned against him. “Okay, Ai. Whatever you say.”
“And if a man comes to the door, never EVER answer it, got it!”
“Mhm.”
“I’m serious, darling. I’ll gouge their eyes out right in front of you.”
“Yes sir.”
The rest of your life was going to be very interesting. Suck it, Ms. Braxton. I guess you’re the one dying alone. Because you have a yandere boyfriend! And she has gonorrhea. Bitch.
---
a/n: this is so shit. i'm so sorry that i've been MIA for a while. work has been pretty crazy and i haven't really felt much motivated to write. however, i'm trying to get back into it now. with this goofy shit. kind of a joke piece, but i needed to write something silly and not serious at all to relax. (also i've been writing since 4 a.m., so...) anyways, i'm going to try and update regulary or at least post something.
Here's my YouTube. I make anime playlists.
#male yandere#yandere male#yandere oc#yandere boy#yandere boyfriend#yandere x reader#yandere x darling#yandere x y/n#yandere x willing reader#x reader#yandere scenarios#yandere boyfriend scenario#yandere kinnie#my writing#long break#goofy ahh#anime playlist#youtube channel#youtuber#creative writing#crack post#fluff scenario#fluff fanfic#requests are open#requests open#oneshot#yandere anime boyfriend#yandere manga boy#please request
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Nightshift pt.3
Having them as roommates was a problem
Tags: smut, mdni, ageless and blank blogs will be blocked, explicit language, f!reader, college au, Gojo and Geto as housemates , jealousy (again), filming, fingering, oral (f and m giving and receiving), public s[e]x (in the car) , panty stealing, crying, hand job, double penetration, squirting, threesome, hair pulling, edging, overall just me going feral again,
Author's note: I'll be honest with everybody in here, I'm embarrassed by what I'm writing. My creativity surprises me sometimes.
Author's note(again, sorry): I wanted to post it sooner but I'm busy with school and shit. My classes are in the morning and I'm this close on dropping everything for some sleep 🤏 (I wrote this a few months ago and all I can say is that life is so much better after dropping out.)
Pt1 Pt2 masterlist roommatesmasterlist
Life is strange. It's amusing the way it works. Fascinating, you could even say. Goofy, perhaps. But a thing was clearly, as long as you're housemates with Gojo and Geto you'll never live a peaceful day ever again.
Truly strange.
And you can't even figure it out when it all started, because now it's just normal. Your worries flew out the window a long time ago. Did you think that your relationship was weird? Yes. But it's not that unusual if you don't think about it.
You were anxious because they were anxious. Their weird energy got to you, that's why you ran away. Or maybe your thoughts got to them and now it was this game where everyone goes back and forth for nothing. Fighting over things that aren't even that deep to begin with. Conversation will always be the key. And if you know how to use it, then you'd have access to so many doors in life.
That's some philosophical talk, and we don't do stuff like that in this house. It was an idiot trying to show how dumb the other is, even if they share the same brain cells. Everyone were dumbasses in here. No one knew how to communicate or use the so called keys. Everyone were on their own trying to do what they know the best.
It's complicated. What is right and what is wrong? What made you so irresistible that made those hungry wolves to want to eat you alive? What made you so gorgeous that they couldn't take their eyes away? What made them want to compete with each other when they used to share women like air, changing the person next to them like socks. Here's a lady, and now another.
No one wanted to share anymore. All they wanted to do was to prove that one can have you more than the other. A competition with no start and finish line until you decide to make it stop. Which one you liked more? Which one made you stay up at night or make your pussy wet by just thinking of him?
Which one did popped up in your head first? Did you touched yourself think of someone? The thoughts could go on and on. It was truly amusing the way they didn't try to talk to you. Only make fantasies in their heads while observing you. So small, so cute. So ready to take that cock right now.
One had to do the first move on proving something that it doesn't need to be proved. Someone will cry, someone will laugh. One will end up victorious while the other will be sad. It can be both of them who's crying. It can be a whole another mf that gets you in the end.
Someone need to do something. Quick. Fast. Just hurry up.
And the one who did the first move was Gojo. Just the way he asked you to move in with him, he was also the one that made the decision on what's going to happen next.
It was simple. It wasn't even a move to get you. It was more to piss Geto off. It was to annoy his friend with the fact that he fucks you when he's out. It was to show him that you're having so much fun when he's not home. It was an audio of your sweet moans opened at the wrong time.
Geto didn't had the time to check his phone when he was out. Now that he got home, he walked in the kitchen, ready to eat something with you and his other housemate. He sat down on his chair, took a few bites and then press play on what his friend sent him. Moans. Everyone stopped and turned their heads on the dark haired man.
"Suguru, you dirty bastard." Satoru laughed. You looked in shook. You didn't even recognize the voice of who ever was that on his phone.
"Satoru, why would you send that?"
"Satoru???" you looked at the white haired man and all he did was to laugh.
It was just the start. Next time Geto received a video.
It started with Gojo placing his phone on the kitchen counter, facing you who was washing the dishes. He left his phone there and walked behind you, kissing you softly as his hands went down on you. You only sighed. You stopped whatever you were doing for him. His hands already in your pants, fingers rubbing your clit slowly. Your soft sounds, the way you let him do what he wanted to do. Suguru's eyes were fixed on the screen. He wanted to turn up the volume so bad, to hear you. He wanted to listen to your voice. And then the video stopped with Satoru fucking you with his fingers, his eyes moving on the camera, smirking.
Fucking hell.
How unfortunate for him to be away from home. Why does he have to be out here instead of being in that damn house.
So he waited. He waited until he got home. He waited a few days for his dear friend to go away, to just be out this house so he could get his hands on you.
Ohoho. And when he did.. He placed his phone on the couch, to face your lower half, getting in the picture your thighs and him who was in between your legs, eating you out.
He was doing it with so much passion only to make you loud. To make you clearly shake for the camera to capture it. To make your hands go in his hair so hesitantly, not knowing if you should pull at it or not, if you could even touch him. His arms were flexed, looking so big compared to your body. He was doing it intentionally, he even did a few pushed ups before he even pressed the record button.
He didn't wait for the sun to shine at the right angle for nothing. Everything was calculated, from the way the camera captures your body, to the best place in the house.
And it sure did backfired at Gojo, who was staring impatiently at the clock. When can he go home? When can he see you himself? That fucker. He thinks he can play his game? The game Satoru started? To think that he's the one jealous now.
And here was the plan for the other video the white haired man did. Or this is how it went.
Skin against skin. Usually he would have been scared of crushing you with his weight, but today? His body on top of yours, chest against chest. Your bare skin touching him with nothing in the way, your legs wrapped around his waist. Whenever you or him tried to get a little away, someone dragged the other back. Your nails into his back, holding into him like your life depended on it. Everything felt so intimate. The way you looked at him. Those big eyes that Geto calls ugly. That dumb little smile. You looked in love. In love? No. It can't be. Can you even love to begin with?
Is this what made you happy? Playing this gentleman of a man? Someone who will hold you tight in moments like this? I mean, who doesn't. But did you really liked it that much?So much that you'd look at that guy he calls his friend like you've been in love with him all your life? You're not even doing anything, just kissing, you're bodies being pressed against each other.
He had to try it himself.
Just like before. He waited for the right moment, then acted his plan up. Because if he'll get interrupted or wake up with an unwanted guest he'll go nuts.
He wasn't horny. He wasn't even in the mood to do something today, all he wanted to see was if you were like in that stupid video.
He sat at the edge in your bed, watching you getting your clothes off, never taking his eyes of you, always making you stay in front of him where he can see you better. His hands carefully placed on you, slowly dragging you into his arms.
He kissed your jaw, your neck, his hands all over your body. Just wanting to feel your skin, the warmth you gave him. How you looked so different compared to him. You were glowing, you were like a flower carefully placed in a field full of sunlight. And he was the moon who wanted to take all that happiness. The way you smiled under that damn sun, he wanted to take that away.
"Suguru.." you said his name so lovely. He was really going to bite you.
"Kiss me." he ordered. He wanted you to do a wrong move so he could punish you for looking so warmly. You let him in your arms so easily. It made him mad.
You cupped his face in your hands and kissed him. It was so quick that he bearly even noticed.
"You call that a kiss?" he wrapped his arms around you and let himself fall down in bed, dragging you along with him. You yelped. You closed your eyes by how suddenly that was.
Skin against skin, huh? To hold you so close that you basically become a part of him.
He just got an idea.
He wrapped his hands around you while you were on top of him, trying your best to not fall into him. All he did was to tease you. His mouth on your chest, kissing and biting your nipples. One of his hands on your ass while the other was rubbing your back. Making you move your hips without even think on him. What he needed was you all needy for him.
And when he finally got you all desperate, he opened his camera, acting all nonchalant. Acting like he does this on a daily basis, like he have you all over him like this.
"You want me that bad?" he was a good actor, or at least that's what he thought.
"Stop playing with me. I need it right now." his heart skipped a beat, and so did Satoru's when he saw the video. The way you looked down at Suguru. The way you moved his pants to let his cock free, almost jumping on it instantly. It was his laughter that made you stop for a moment. You were frustrated, and you made sure to let him know about your feeling by looking angrily at him. He played with you for so long, you can't even count the minutes he played with your pussy. Fingering you so good and then stopped right when you were so close. He did this so many times that you don't trust a single word he says anymore. "You think it's funny?" you finally got his dick inside you. And oh, you're not going to stop until you get to actually cum this time.
"If you wanted me that much you should have said it earlier." he moved his hips forward, to help you. And to help himself.
"Dickhead." you slapped his chest softly. You couldn't listen to his words even if you wanted to. All you did was to move your hips, you needed any kind of friction. Anything that would calm the aching between your legs. Anything that would finally make you cum.
Your hand went between your legs, rubbing your clit, and biting your lip, refusing to let any sounds out that might feed his ego.
"Y/N." he looked in your eyes. He moved your hand away and he started to rub your clit. All you did was to gasp. "Focus. Move your hips like you mean it." this fucker. All he got from you were some little curses you let under your breath and you moving your hips better.
That video ended with you almost cumming. So close that it got Gojo gasping when he saw how fast the video ended. He didn't got to see you cum? The disrespect. The audacity. The idea he just got.
For the first time since you live there, Gojo call you in his room and placed you on his bed. Until now it was your room or any other place around the house. Anywhere but his own bed.
You never thought you'll get to sit in his bed like this. To get to do the forbidden tango in his room.
He got in bed next to you, placing you on his lap nice and cozy, your back pressed against his chest. "Hold this for me, ok?" he handed you his phone.
"What do you want me to do with it?" you asked unsure. You knew he was filming your little escapades for quite some time now, but to hand you the camera himself?
"Film it. Do whatever you want with it. Show me what you want me to see." you got a little unsure there.
"Alright.." you noticed that it was already recording before you thought of something. The camera was facing your face, capturing Gojo behind you. You moved it lower, now facing your chest, not even sure what he wanted to see.
His hands on your hips, slowly getting his dick inside your pussy. That warm thight pussy he loved so much. "Am I doing good?" his hand moved overs yours, moving the camera lower to film how it looked with his cock inside you.
"Make sure to capture everything." Suguru looked at his phone without any words. It didn't matter what Gojo might think of doing next, Geto haves to be the one with the better idea.
And another video was made.
Geto offered to buy the groceries. It was supposed to be Gojo's time this week, and how could he refuse someone else doing his chores for him? And so, Suguru dragged you with him.
The surprise look on Satoru's face to receive an video when you just left half an hour ago. You on top of Suguru in his car, because the dark haired man took Gojo's car for this quick trip. His excuse was that he mistook the keys with his.
He would had expected that video any time, but not today. Not like this. Not when he was took of guard. He couldn't help but look at the screen and turn the volume up.
You're half muffled moans and Geto praising the shit out of you. "Good girl, just like that." and you couldn't help but bounce on him faster. "Keep it slow now, we wouldn't want someone to notice us." oh, but he was actually dying inside for someone to see you two. Both of your roommates hoped for you to get caught.
"Suguru.." you moaned that name so sweetly. Honestly, Satoru was so jealous right now. If he knew sooner, he wouldn't had let someone else do his chores for him. He could have been in that car and fuck you.
He waited for you to come home. He sat right in front of the entrance, waiting for that fucker to appear. He needed to think of something even better. How about fucking you in Suguru's bed? Or making you wear his clothes to make his friend jealous? Even fuck you in them just to prove a point. Bath you in his perfume so you would smell like him. There was so many options.
And he got an even better idea.
He let you rest for that day. No, he let you rest for the rest of that week. Waiting for the perfect day, the perfect moment.
"It's my turn to do the laundry." Geto sighed. "You got anything else left in your rooms? Give it now." Gojo smiled and shook his head.
"I have nothing in my room." you said.
"Me neither."
"Alright then." he waited for Geto to get started with his work, then he dragged you in his room. He was so impatient that he didn't know what to do faster. He was taking your clothes off, his clothes, kissing you, rubbing that pretty pussy so you would get wet faster. He was so impatient that he didn't even prepared you first, the moment you layed on his bed he got in between your legs, forcing his cock inside your pussy. It hurts a little, but it also hurts his pride not being able to outdo his friend.
He's number one. He's the biggest person here.
He got his phone out as soon as he could move better, pressing the record button as fast as he could.
He was thrusting into you, not even once letting you breathe in peace. "You're pussy feels so good." that's all he could say. "Sucking me in like this." what he got in return was a photo of your underwear. A photo where Geto was holding some pairs of panties that he could recognize them in a instant, they were yours.
"I don't think Y/N would mind if I take some of these." Gojo stared at his phone screen. Tsk. He wasn't satisfied with the reaction he got.
"I'll keep the pair that I just took off her." Geto looked displeased at his phone screen. Would his friend be happy if he just barge in there and auto invite himself in? He didn't do that in the end, he already had other things to do. And if he just go there, Gojo would be the winner because that means he gave in.
"Alright, I don't what's going on between you two but I want you to stop." you went the next day in the kitchen, ready to put an end to this endless fighting of theirs. "I know you've been filming and sending the videos to one another, and I want this to end because this is going nowhere." you sighed. "If you want photos that much you should have asked me instead of fighting."
"You'll send me pictures of you if we stop fighting?" Gojo asked like he didn't heard what you just said. He ignored everything until you said that last sentence.
"That's not what I said."
"You said that you would." Geto totally listened to you, but again, he only understands what he wants.
"Did you even listen to me?"
"So, if we get along again and we stop filming you'll do it?" you could only sigh. These guys were so delusional that you couldn't even talk to them like normal people.
"Alright." you didn't even tried anymore, giving up was the best option.
"Is that an yes?"
"Yes."
"Well, that's good because we weren't fighting to begin with." Geto's words left you in disbelief. Huh?
"Ye, we just like to show what we're doing. Nothing much." Gojo said nonchalantly.
"Why didn't you said that earlier?"
"I was waiting for you to finish talking."
"Alright, so. For starter I want to get photos of your boobies. Some videos of you touching yourself here and there to make my day going when I'm tired. I want that pussy fully on display." Gojo already started a list.
"You could send me a picture right now." Geto's words didn't helped the situation.
"Show me what nudes you have in your phone." Satoru got next to you, trying to see your phone and what's in there.
It was your fault for thinking they're normal, because they're not, not at all.
Fortunately for you, your days became more peaceful. You kept your words to send them some pics now and then, and they stopped competing with each other. Oh, and don't think that you could send them the same picture, because they would get mad.
You hated there, but you gotta learn how to live with it, because you were also receiving stuff from them. A dick pic whenever they missed you, even some videos of them touching themselves moaning your name. It was just crazy. It never fails to make your jaw drop.
But your days came back to normal, no? Whatever normal even means anyway.
You woke up on another peaceful morning, because it was quiet and no one disturbed your sleep. You got up from your bed and went in the kitchen. Just wanting to feel their company there, maybe exchange some small talk and then fall asleep since you feel rather tired and lonely. Instead, you saw your house mates with another guy. A tall blonde guy who looked older than both of them.
You didn't know what to say, you just stood there trying to think of your next move. Go back to your room, it was none of your business, you shall not get involved.
"Oh? I didn't know you're up." the white haired man said before you could go back to bed.
"Good morning." Suguru greeted you, a cup of coffee in his hand.
"Good morning." you quietly said.
"Don't go just now. Come here." can you get a break? You did as he said, you went and sat down at the table at your usual spot. "Y/N, this is Nanami." Gojo said.
"Nice to meet you." you didn't know what to do.
"Nanami, this is our sweet Y/N." Satoru said it with this weird smile on his face. You had no idea what was going on in his head. Can he not embarrass you for once? You and Nanami sighed at the same time.
"I'm sorry for him. He usually behaves like this so I have no excuse." you said in Gojo's behalf.
"I don't expect much from him anyway." you studied the blonde a little. The expensive watch that was on his wrist, and the nice fancy shirt he had on. He had big shoulders, his muscles could be seen even through his clothes. His posture was flawless, everything about his screamed perfection. You didn't mean to stare, but he was definitely eye catching.
Your housemates were watching you. Who's fault was it for getting Kento here? They should have thought of how you'll react first.
They're jealous again.
They just managed to calm themselves and now it's starting again. This again, this again and again. Can they ever take a break?
Was this what you wanted? A guy like him? What's so perfect about Nanami, huh? Was it how he present himself? He looks tired, like he haven't slept in who knows how long. And yet, that didn't stopped him from dressing like usually or doing what he's supposed to do.
He looks like he was working a 9 to 5, and would treat you right. He looks like he would buy you flowers on a daily basis. He looks like he would remember all those small dates where it supposed to be an anniversary or someone's birthday. He looked like he was there to stay and put a ring on your finger. Was this what you wanted? A husband who would help you raise the kids properly?
Both Gojo and Geto gasped at the same time, they did a big mistake.
"Y/N, no." Satoru finally said something when he came back to reality. He haves to do something now so you won't end up married. Especially to Nanami, he looked like he would be perfect, that's what scares him the most.
"Y/N, go to sleep. It's too early for you." you looked confused at both of them. They told you stay there in the first place.
"Huh?" you looked at them in disbelief.
"Just go."
"Alright..?" you got up from your seat and went back to your room. What a bunch of weirdos.
That day, they promised to become just like the enemy, so that way you won't be impressed by some random fucker out there.
Their plan would fail so miserable, like always, but you can't do shit about it. It's not like you can figure their next move to stop them.
You walked out your room to get something to drink, only to be welcomed by them dressed like they were going to a job interview.
You looked at them, blinked a few times then looked behind you. No cameras or anything, or at least you can't see it. Was this some kind of prank? Was it some kind of special day today?
"You're speechless by how handsome I look, huh?" you blinked a few times. "No need to be shy, admire me as much as you need." Gojo striked a few poses.
"What's the occasion?" you asked getting closer to them.
"I always dress like this." the way Suguru lied with a straight face.
"You do? This is the first time I see you like this." you fixed Gojo's tie. "Do I need to wear a dress or something?"
You got dragged in your room and placed on the bed while they were looking in your closet. They put their hands on everything they saw, bras, panties and anything they could find. It didn't matter. If they see it, they'll get their hands on it.
"So what are we doing?" you asked.
"Playing dress up, isn't it obvious?" Gojo got something in his hands and got closer to your bed. "Hands up." he took your shirt off.
"I don't really see anything for you to try." Geto was still looking through your clothes.
"Let me get those down for you." Satoru took your pants off. His hands traveling back to your panties, wanting to take those off too.
"These stays on."
"Nuh uhh." he tried dragging your panties down, only for you to try to pull them up.
"Let me do it." you tried to protest.
"No." he slapped your hand. "We're playing dress up. Get those off and let me choose another pair for you." you gasped at his actions. Did he really just slapped your hand away?
"Satoru." Geto said something, making you to breathe reassured. "Move away. I'll do it." these fuckers. What could you expect.
"Alright, alright! I'll take them off myself." their eyes on you, you got their full attention. You raised your hips and with a simple move you took your panties off. Your actions will always work like magic on them. The way they're so captivated by such a simple movement.
"Put them back on." Satoru said, his eyes still on your skin. The scene from earlier replaying in his mind over and over again.
"You told me to take them off. Why would I have to put them back on?" you could only complain because of how childish this situation was.
Geto got on his knees in front of you, picking the small material that you just took off. "Get up." he commanded.
Can they stop playing with you for at least a moment? You did as he said tho, you got up and you couldn't do much since your way was blocked by the dark haired man. A kiss placed on your lower stomach before he put your underwear back on you. Your hands were on his shoulders, trying to hold yourself from falling.
"Not fair." Satoru dragged you back on your bed. Your back pressed against the blanket and Gojo in between your legs. He got your panties in between his teeth, slowly dragging them down and tossing it somewhere around the room.
"What got into you two again?" it was something sinister about how they look at you. Their eyes dark and filled with some kind of lust you didn't saw it before. It was normal for you to be horny, it was normal for them too, but now it was different. You had no idea if your insides would be rearranged or you'll have the sweetest time of your life. It scared you.
Gojo was breathing against your pussy, hot breath touching your skin over and over. It made you squirm a little. While Geto's hand went through your hair, moving it from your face. He sat down next to your head, his thumb slowly getting in your mouth, giving you something to occupy yourself with.
"Guys?" their silence was scaring you. All you hoped was that you could still walk tomorrow.
Satoru finally got his face in your pussy, he was practically making out with it. Never giving you a break from the start.
"Eyes up on me." Geto kept reminding you. You couldn't even close your eyes, because if you blinked too fast or too long, he also didn't like that.
You could feel Gojo's long fingers getting inside you. Moving them in and out of you for a moment, making you more wet than you already were. Then he started to curl them, instantly making your body shake.
One side was satisfied with your reactions, the other one not so much.
"Focusm" Suguru wanted you to only look at him. His hand now in your hair, keeping you in place so couldn't take your eyes off him.
"Y/N, look at me." Satoru said your name, placing a kiss on your clit before he started devouring it. Your back arches. Suguru gulped at your fucked up expression. It was cute, no, it was in so many ways that he can't describe it. You were breath taking, now and at any other time of the day, every position and anything you might do from any angle. He wanted to fuck you and see more. He was so close on pushing Gojo away and fuck you the way you deserve it.
Gojo didn't looked happy at the way his friend kept your attention all to himself. "Say my name." it was a beg, it was a request. It sounded like anything but demanding. He sounded needy. He needed to hear you praise him, tell him how good he makes you feel and move your hand in his hair.
"Look at me." Suguru kept demanding the same thing over and over again. It didn't matter who's name you said as long as you're only focused on him, right? That means he won.
However, you realized they're doing it again. That useless fighting. You don't want only one of them, you wanted both. A little bit of what they have to offer you. Whatever they wanted to show you, you'll accept it.
They acted like this ever since Nanami was there. They started acting like this out of jealousy.
You wanted to punish them somehow. It was for the useless things they're thinking about.
You opened your mouth, you wanted to say something, yet no word got out your mouth. What if you said another person name. Someone who's not in the room at the moment. Someone who's not usually here at all. Your eyes were sparkling thinking of ways of torturing them, Geto could see that. Those eyes that looked so lovingly now full of fireworks and that dumb smile you had on your face.
Think of him, look at him. Only see him. Say how much you wanted him. Him and him only. What made you full of life if it wasn't him?
You had to do it. You had to punish them for being selfish again. Yet you couldn't. No matter how much you would love to see their reactions, you knew you were digging your own grave. It's you in the end who will suffer for anything they might deserve.
What if you don't say anything at all? What if you keep your voice to yourself and not let them hear you at all. That's what the silent treatment is after all, no? And so you did, you bite your lower lip and put a hand over your mouth.
Geto could only laugh, thinking that you're afraid someone might hear you. No one besides them would hear a thing, he could reassure that. He moved your hand gently, hopping you'll understand him without a word needed. Yet you still refused to let out any kind of noise. "No one will hear you. So don't worry."
"I know." that's the only words you said. You knew and yet you still do it?
"Maybe it's because of you. Look the other way." Gojo said, his hands around your thighs dragging you closer to him.
"It's actually because of you." Geto said, getting more close to you. You didn't said anything. And this only gave them the wrong idea.
They were trying to imitate the enemy, so, maybe it was their clothes? Or maybe the blonde was still in your head and you were trying to think of him? It infuriats them. They only wants your attention, the way you looked at Nanami so curious, so full of questions. You don't look like that at them.
Gojo got up from between your legs and Geto dragged you up in his lap.
"Why you're being a bad girl? Hm?" Suguru's low voice purred into your ear, so close, it gave you chills.
"Are we not enough? What do you want more." you were sandwiched between them, your back pressed on Geto's chest while Gojo was in front of you, getting his body closer to you with each second passes. Your legs were wrapped around Satoru, mostly because he placed them like this, to make sure to have access to you as much as he could. While Suguru's arms were also wrapped around you, keeping you firmly against him, not letting you move an inch.
You still refused to say a thing even if you had no idea what they're talking about. You just got tired of their games, those stupid thoughts of theirs that made your head spin. You couldn't figure out what was going on with them, why were they like this. What made them like this.
"Say something." Satoru's voice had so many emotions in it. Rage, disappointment. Sadness? It was complicated, yet it made your pussy drip.
"Y/N, do you want to see me mad?" Suguru got one of your hands to his mouth, kissing the back of your hand. You were like a doll in their hands. Standing there without doing much. It was supposed to be your punishment for them, for fucking with your life like this when they could talk everything out. But now you want to back down. Mostly because you were feeling scared. Their eyes were scary, the roughness in their hands scared you. How they're squeezing places around your body so hard that it might leave a bruise, and how quiet they became.
Should you apologize? You had no idea. Was it too late to say something?
You opened your mouth, eyes on you for your next move. Yet you still didn't say a thing. You close your mouth and looked away. If they're getting on your nerves you'll definitely say someone else's name to piss them off.
Are you not allowed to get mad? Do you have no right to do so? They did it with their own hands. You can put them in place however you want, whenever you wanted. No, in fact, you'll give them some time to think about this, about how they act in general. Sure, you have no problem with them being themselves, you love it. But it was until some certain point where you would tolerate their behavior.
You put your palms on the bed trying to get up somehow. That action itself made them go feral in the worst way possible. Why are you doing this to them? Their hearts almost stopped working.
"Don't do this, come on." no matter how mad you might be, their pleas sounded like a sweet melody. It was the way they're melting in your arms. Satoru's voice sounded broken when he spoke. You're not even doing much, yet it affects them so much. Both of them were weak for you, you got them on their knees trying to get your attention. Of course they would get mad if another is trying to get in.
You didn't said anything, only looking at them, those big eyes again, it was like the first time you interacted with them. So curious about your surroundings. You looked up at Suguru, and then looked at Satoru, who were looking at you trying to figure out what in the world is going on in your head.
"Say something." Geto's voice was so soft, even if he was angry at you. His hand went lower on your body, caressing your soft skin, somehow hoping that you'll warm up. Maybe you wanted more of their attention? "It's your fault." Suguru looked at Gojo.
"Me? You were the one who was like, look at me. Maybe she got enough of your ass." Satoru tried to imitate Geto's voice.
"Me? It's you. You started this." you tried to not laugh. You can't give up yet, all you wanted was to hear them say that they're sorry, or anything that shows that they realized their mistake, nothing more. But they're refusing to believe it's their fault.
"Alright, stop." you sighed softly. "Think about what you both did." they're still thinking about how you might be seeing another, forgetting about them. Moving out of this place and leaving them to be as miserable as they used to be, all sad and not even happy to be back home, spend all their time outside just to forget about their loneliness.
How dare you play with their feelings? For once in their lifetime they're serious about something and you're just toying with them? Gojo got his hands on your hips, dragging your ass on him, positioning himself after he undid his belt. With a simple movement, his cock was out his pants. Now he was getting in front of your entrance, ready to get inside. Why did you looked surprise, huh. "Why don't you think about what you did?" he's trying to imitate your words, like you're the bad guy.
You gasped when he pushed himself inside you all the way in with a single move, if he could at least give you an warning. Geto got your face in his hand, making you look up at him. "Inside voice. Don't let a single word out." this was ridiculous. What were they even thinking?
You frown, you didn't know what to say or do. You had them in your palm, right? Why were they like this then? This wasn't your plan. All you wanted was for them to think about their actions.
You wanted both of them, you gave your time to both of them. It wasn't only one who received your attention, it was both. You didn't let a single one feel left out, and they still dare to think that you're selfish.
"Bad boys." you said out of breath, trying to degrade them somehow.
"Oh yeah?" Satoru could only laugh. "I can show you how bad I really am."
"Sweetie, you have no idea what you're talking about." Geto felt amused by your words. They were so considered of you until now, or they tried. Sure, it might have not work all the time since they forget halfway through that's not only about them. But they tried, no? It was improvement in a way or another.
Gojo's hands were gripping your hips, moving in and out. The friction was overwhelming. You wanted to change the position, it was uncomfortable. You don't know where to even look when they were squeezing you between them.
Your hands were shaking, you didn't know where to put them since both of them annoyed you. You wanted to keep them to yourself, yet you were dying to do something.
You closed your eyes, grabbing your own thighs and leaving red marks on them from your nails, being around them was so stressful.
You bite your lower lip, trying your best to stay put it place. A few tears went down your face, the way Gojo was fucking into you was just.. Just. You can't even say words. "Cry for me. Let me hear that voice." Satoru's face went to your shoulder, trying to rest against it.
"Keep that voice inside." Geto was trying to push Gojo away. Wanting to tournament you for a little longer.
"Don't listen to him." the white haired man was out of breath, voice so low that it gave you chills. "Open your eyes, look at me."
Suguru's hand went under your chin, raising it to make you look at him. "Look at me." his voice sounded so soft compared to his thoughts and actions. You kept your eyes closed, wanting only to focus on their voices, on how they breathe.
"Fuck." Gojo said out of breath. He bite into your shoulder, making you groan for a moment.
Then a sudden thought went through Geto's head. He could do something so funny right now, something that could help you feel better, or not. It all depends on your performance. So, his hand traveled to your pussy, rubbing your clit in small circles and making your walls squeeze Satoru's dick. Couldn't they just act like this and stop being fuckers?
Without even thinking, one of your hands went of Gojo's shoulder while the other grabbed Geto's arm. You were shaking, you were biting your lip and you were so close. Satoru could feel that, and Suguru realized what was going on by your actions, you look desperate only when your about to cum.
Now, this is where was the funny part, at least for Geto. He dragged his hand back, leaving you with less friction than before. But that only caught Gojo's attention who understood what was going on without a single word needed. So, now you were left all alone without any kind of pleasure or friction, since even the white haired guy got out of you, leaving you there panting heavily and trying to understand what was going on. This left a bad feeling in your stomach, it left you all confused and trying to regain your conscious, your brain couldn't work properly.
"Why do you look so disappointed?" they were mocking you, you could feel it by the tone of their voices.
"Were you close?" so painfully close. That would have been a good orgasm if they didn't stopped.
Suddenly, you woke up being turned around, ass in the air and face pressed against your blanket. "Up." Satoru moved in front of you, making you rest your body weight on your arms.
"Be a good girl and you might cum this time." Suguru was behind you, placing a slap on your ass before he pushed his cock inside you.
You could feel a hand behind your neck, dragging your face up to look at the white haired man. He leaned down, placing a kiss on your lips for a moment before he too pushed his dick inside your mouth. They loved stuffing you good, didn't they? The way you struggle to take them, and yet doing so good.
Maybe it was your fault too, for ending up like this. You knew you shouldn't have fucked around with them, but you always go back, asking for more and letting them do whatever they wanted with you. Plus, you feel so good, like, so so good. It was impossible to hold back around you.
That's why they keep pushing more of them inside of you, trying to make you take more. Because you, yourself are greedy for more. You always end up begging for more, so how could they not give you more?
"Relax." Suguru said as he kept feeling you clenching around him, making him groan as one of his hands was traveling around your body.
But how could you relax? You were so close, and knowing them, they might deny you again. You wanted to cum, you needed this orgasm and if they're edging you again you swear you will leave through that door and find somebody who will give you what you want. They seemed to enjoy this, so why couldn't you do as well?
Your hand went to the one behind you, dragging him closer and making sure he stays there. Just a little more, it was so close. You might as well start crying because of how it was feeling.
A thing that they loved more than edging you over your limits was seeing you cum. It was something about the way you look when you're all fucked up. So it wasn't surprising when they dropped everything they were doing and focused on you, because they too know this would be a big one.
You woke up with your face against the bed sheets, hands all over you once again and all kind of words being whispered in your ear, about how good you're doing. How you'll get a lot more after this, how they'll make you cum again and again, for as long as you want. Well, you both know that some of those were lies, because it was more about until when they want this to continue.
Your cries were satisfying, and they aren't even afraid to admit that. How you grip the sheets underneath you, or how you moved your hand on Satoru, holding into him as you came, leaving a big mess on the bed as your body juices came out.
They both looked at you, not believing what they just saw. "Did you just squirted?" the white haired man said, whistling at the view you're giving him.
"I'm sure she can do it again, can't she?" that was more than enough to know that it would be a long day. You doub you'll be able to get out of bed any time soon, and who knows, maybe it won't be as bad as you think.
#gojo satoru#gojo satoru smut#gojo smut#gojo x reader#jjk smut#jjk x reader#gojou satoru x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#suguru geto#suguru geto smut#geto x reader#geto suguru x reader#geto smut#jjk fanfic#jujutsu kaisen x reader
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charles leclerc | cl16 fic recs
———————————— 🏎️🏎️ ————————————
one shots
home is wherever you are - @katsu28
“secretly falling in love with your best friend is tough. secretly falling in love with your best friend who also happens to be your roommate is even less than ideal. the solution? move out!”
the honorary wag - @harrysfolklore
“yn has always been known as 'the honorary wag', since she's kika's best friend and adored by all the other wags, but what happens when the girls want her to become an official wag? a bet to get her and charles together before kika and pierre's wedding sounds like a plan”
feels like sabotage - @5sospenguinqueen
“the grid have decided that this is the season to see who can injure yn the most. (not intentionally, they all feel terrible about it). fed up of seeing his girlfriend injured, charles decides to enact revenge”
after all - @scuderiahoney
“charles is a lot of things. he’s determined, hardworking, a bit of a self sacrificing dumbass. he’s kind, talented, humble, confident, soft. he’s your best friend, your closest confidant, the person you would trust with your life. and, according to everyone who’s ever seen the two of you together, he’s madly in love with you”
sign here… wait, what?! - @neferaskingdom
“two strangers hit the courthouse for a ticket and a typo fix—next thing you know, they’re accidentally married. chaos, a clerk who couldn’t care less, and a fiancée on the verge of a meltdown, convinced it’s all some evil plot. spoiler: it’s not”
it’s not you, it’s your pants - @neferaskingdom
“girl roasts charles leclerc’s tragic pants online, then accidentally crashes into him in monaco. cue spilled coffee, fashion rants, and an existential crisis about how her life turned into a wattpad fanfic in under five minutes”
accidental interactions- @inevesgf
“in which you and charles can’t stop running into each other after one minor incident”
series
a house, a home series - @vetteltea
“a loveless marriage usually comes after years, not before. you've always loved him, his best friend has always loved you”
deal series - @golden-cherry
“your whole life has gone to shit. your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it's his apartment”
the winner takes all series - @silverstonesainz
“one win, one loss. how does it all unfold, and how will it all come together?”
the smallest man who ever lived series - @monzabee
“the one where you’re thrown into a conundrum when you learn the news of your husband, charles’, infidelity”
smau
the chapter of charles - @l4nd0n0rr1s - smau
“in which charles leclerc falls in love with y/n the booktuber”
ferrari at heart - @fastandcarlos - smau
“as your interest in f1 grows, so does your interest in a certain ferrari driver”
wrong number - @ham1lton - smau
“nothing. maybe just ignore my awful photoshop skills. also is this based on a real interaction of mine? yes. this is just a crackfic, don’t take it seriously at all please”
notes - @hugleclerc - smau
"lando's sister starts posting notes she gets from a secret boy"
the king of monza can do what he wants - @astonmartinii - smau
"the king of monza can win the race, have his relationship exposed and challenge his soon-to-be father-in-law to a duel, he can do what he wants"
she devil - @norris55s - smau
“the one where y/n is charles' ice cold teammate, and she melts”
*these are part of my fic rec masterlist, please note none of these are written by me and the author of each story had been tagged! check out my f1 fic rec masterlist for other drivers!*
#charles leclerc fic rec#charles leclerc x y/n#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc fic#charles leclerc smau#cl16 x reader#cl16 x y/n#cl16 fic#cl16 fic rec#formula 1 fic rec#f1 fic rec
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Holiday w/ Friends pt. 2
Random posts on the TL of the lads girlies and their holiday trip ft. comments from the LIs, Jenna and Nero
liiisa_
♥️ liked by misshuntermc, simonesays, imjenna and 78k others
liiisa_: this bitch really crashed this hoe
tagged: misshuntermc
comments
misshuntermc: I would've made it if I didn’t get stuck on that snowdrift
↳ simonesays: you mean the tree? 🤨
imjenna: what is she pointing at?
↳ liiisa_: A TREE ↳ talkthat_tara: “can you shovel some of this snow?” BITCH THATS A TREE
misshuntermc: why are you bringing up old shit?
↳ liiisa_: this was 30 minutes ago ↳ misshuntermc: exactly
talkthat_tara: she almost ran the instructor over we should've known she’d crash 🙄
↳ misshuntermc: are y’all jumping me right now? ↳ simonesays: babes please stay a passenger princess 🙏🏼 ↳ liiisa_: PLEASE 🙏🏼
_thedrzayne: mistakes happen 🤷🏻♂️
lumiere.who: that tree shouldn't have been there
seagod_raf_: that tree is a hater 😤
skye.109: Do I need to buy the resort?
↳ seagod_raf_: Relax my guy you're not the only one with money ↳ skye.109: Huh? oh I thought somebody with the lowest bounty said something ↳ seagod_raf_: Alright now I gotta assassinate you ↳ _thedrzayne: Since when is having a bounty on your head a good thing?
talkthat_tara: well damn…. ^^
talkthat_tara
♥️ liked by misshuntermc, simonesays, liiisa_ and 82.3k others
talkthat_tara: Healing my inner child every time we’re together 🥰
tagged: misshuntermc, simonesays, liiisa_
comments
misshuntermc: Stop I will cry right now 🥺
liiisa_: “you know what yea life is good” - Me every time we hangout 🥹
simonesays: Now what if I cry like a baby?? what then??? HUH!? ☹️
nene.nero: MC is tagged but I don’t see her
↳ misshuntermc: simone knocked me to the floor ↳ simonesays: I made sure you were okay before I laughed ↳ misshuntermc: bitch 😑
imjenna: no invite?
↳ liiisa_: you woulda came? 😧 ↳ talkthat_tara: stop I will come pick you up right now ↳ imjenna: I'll pack my bag ↳ simonesays: AHHHHHH JENNA 🤭
nene.nero: no invite?
↳ simonesays: ….. so anyway im going to the store y’all want anything? ↳ liiisa_: sun chips and gushers please ↳ talkthat_tara: Cheez its ↳ misshuntermc: nerd clusters and wine ↳ nene.nero: 😐
misshuntermc [Private story]
↺ viewed by skye.109, seagod_raf_, thedrzayne and 7 others
misshuntermc: Seconds before disaster
mentioned: liiisa_
talkthat_tara replied to private story: IS THIS HOW YOU GUYS FELL INTO THE MIRROR??
_thedrzayne replied to private story: Please don’t tell me you hurt yourself 😒
seagod_raf_ replied to private story: lol dumbass ☠️
simonesays replied to private story: it sounded like a boulder fell into the house wtf 🥴
liiisa_ replied to private story: bitch im still laughing 🤣🤣
simonesays
♥️ liked by misshuntermc, imjenna, liiisa_ and 78.1k others
simonesays: My dumbass loves 😚
tagged: misshuntermc, talkthat_tara
comments
liiisa_: I wish you would’ve got the noodle smacking MC in the cheek
↳ misshuntermc: why are you praying on my downfall? 🧐
talkthat_tara: That pasta was hot as hell why did I let her talk me into a “noodle race”
↳ misshuntermc: because you love me 🥰 ↳ simonesays: because you two bet money
imjenna: You four are my top hunters what happens when you leave work?
↳ simonesays: we all start running off one braincell 🤷🏻♀️ ↳ liiisa_: I simply turn my brain off ↳ talkthat_tara: brain off just vibin’ 🙂↕️ ↳ misshuntermc: idk man I just work here
pt. 1
#love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#sylus#lnds sylus#love and deepspace sylus#lads#lads rafayel#lads xavier#lads smau#sylus lads#lads zayne#lnds xavier#lnds rafayel#lnds zayne#love and deepspace zayne#love and deepspace xavier#love and deepspace rafayel#lnds mc#lads mc#nikaaaaimagine
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“even i’m not into that shit”
❤︎ synopsis — the sleep token members being fucking morons and fucking around
pairing: sleep token members x gn!reader (can be platonic or romantic)
theme: crack ✦
a/n: I’M BACK !!!! hopefully i don’t disappear for like a good fifty years after this. this is my third set of stupid ass headcanons. i pulled my shitty humor out of my ass for this one, enjoy !!! (the original ask got swallowed by my dumbass because i accidentally posted the unfinished fic 💀 this is dedicated to my bestie @dead-end-fanfiction)
cw: i think the title speaks for itself
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➵ vessel
i just know this man is the most unhygienic motherfucker to ever exist
more specifically with his teeth. he cannot brush his teeth to save his life
like ??? this all powerful, dark deity, has the most stinky ass breath that if anyone dares to even breath it in, they’d disintegrate on the spot
like what the fuck vessel, you’re better than this
i love vessel but he just does weird shit sometimes
he sleeps butt ass naked
and one time you accidentally walked in on him while he was literally stripping to get ready for bed
he stood there like an npc while you were freaking out
“…. what’s wrong—“ “what’s wrong is that YOU’RE BUTT ASS NAKED IN FRONT OF ME—“
vessel is easily fascinated by human things. i mean - he was once human, so he likes to keep in touch every now and then.
however, out of all of the human things he had to have an obsession with.
… it was rubber ducks
this isn’t even explainable— how do you explain this all-powerful sleep entity to be obsessed with rubber ducks
he literally has a whole room dedicated to his collection of anything rubber duck related. give him a gift that has something to do with ducks and he’s making out with you on the spot
that’s not a joke, he did that with you before
➵ ii
this motherfucker is on his last limb and he’s being held together by paper clips
ii’s not even the leader but he cannot catch a break to save his life
he’s the only one that knows how to cook
one time he left ivy and the vesselettes in the kitchen by themselves. came back to house fires and high pitched screaming that definitely was not from the ladies
ii makes bomb ass banana cream pie though
ik for a fact this man does NOT keep his room clean
you once walked into his room to ask him a favor and there were like - a million drumsticks everywhere on the floor while he sat in the center of it
how does one possess that many drumsticks???
“dude what the f— clean your room!” “it gives me inner peace, y/n. go away.”
ii’s scared of the jollibee mascot
he once went out with his buddies to get some of that fast food. that giant red and yellow fuckass bee then came out of nowhere and spooked the shit out of ii
he then socked the guy in the face so hard the dude wearing the costume had a bloody nose
ii quickly fled the scene to not get arrested
after that he’s had a fear of fast food mascots in general, it’s kinda funny.
don’t bring ii near the jack in the box mascot though, he’s got some trauma from what he’s seen on twitter
➵ iii
zesty ahh mf
plays his bass like he’s fingering someone’s asshole like 🤨 whatcha doin’ iii ??
the type of man to set like fifty million alarms but never wakes up to any of them
however he wakes up everyone else in the process
it gets annoying hearing the “by the seaside” ringtone every morning at 6am. so one day you came into his room and poured ice cold water on him to wake him up
iii didn’t wake up from that btw, you thought it was dead
“…. bro wtf wake up—“
thankfully he wasn’t
biggest kpop stan
he’s a boy group stan and his favorite group is ateez
constantly blasting guerilla too
also i feel like iii owns a tumblr blog too
he’d be out here posting some shih like “pov you’re locked in a room w him for twenty four hours and you have to tickle his balls wyd” 💀
he probably posts also moodboards or some shi and tags them like an actual tumblr blogger
#it took my ahh fifty hours to make this plz repost it
stalks his fans on twitter
gets scared by said fans on twitter
“wdym they wanna get me pregnant”
breaks his bass every four hours during practice and vessel chews his ahh out every time
but it’s funny because you’re always there to help him
➵ ivy
he likes to act like he’s tough shit but ivy is a huge nerd
literally the definition of “magical in bed” except the magic is him explaining the gaming system of magic the gathering
hot asf but has no bitches frfr
also the definition of loser trapped in a hottie’s body
i’d like to believe that ivy has a crunchy ipad kid cough
and i mean CRUNCHY. bro will start choking on his saliva and start coughing like a dying seal
it’s quite hilarious, but also concerning at the same time
the first time you heard him cough like that, you were like 😟
“AEUGH- HEUGH— BEUHSHAK-“ “ivy—“
that pretty sums up the entire interaction
this bitch looks like he ate glue as a kid
more specifically glitter glue. the pink kind.
idk that sounds like ivy
he gets literal death coffee in the morning too btw
no ice. no sugar. straight shots of espresso.
eight shots, btw.
the coffee looks blacker than the black hole.
iii tried some of his coffee one time and spat it all in your face. ivy watched with his hell coffee in hand as you beat the shit out of iii
yeah, safe to say ivy was banned from having that kind of coffee for a while
so yeah. that pretty much sums up the kind of person ivy is
#sleep token fanfic#sleep token iv#iii sleep token#sleep token vessel#sleep token x reader#sleep token fanfiction#iii x reader#ii x reader#iv x reader#vessel x reader#crack headcanons#funny headcanon
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I have the forcefem meme blog blocked but someone I follow put a post of her's on my dash and she's just straight up saying "this isn't a kink blog, the way I do forcefem isn't kinky" and I swear my brain stopped working entirely for a second. I don't think there's anything wrong with kinks changing with a subculture or community or becoming memes but like. Come on. Forcefem is a kink, that's what it is. I try not to get too worked up about this blog because it's not good for me and my judgement does get clouded by the dysphoria it triggers but like, it really does genuinely worry me the way the meme-ification of forcefem has completely divorced the kink element from what is still very fucking clearly a kink. This whole "I'm not doing it in a kink way" is not a get out of kink free card, and it's a piss poor excuse for going around and flooding this website with kink stuff that now essentially cannot be avoided in trans spaces. No other kink that has like, a potentially sfw angle has a community that acts like this about it, people who do like bootblacking performances where no explicitly sexual acts take place still make it clear this is a kink thing so people can avoid it if they want, and there are huge arguments in furry communities over if you can even do "sfw" vore because vore is a kink even when no traditional sex acts are being depicted. Every other kink community gets that even when no one is fucking, a kink is still a kink and should be treated as such for the safety of everyone, why should THIS be the exception??
Ugh anyway sorry didn't want this to turn into a rant, I really don't think there's anything wrong with doing a fun sfw kind of forcefem with people who consent but like, as a kinky person who cares a lot about kink and BDSM history and communities the blatant refusal to consider forcefem a kink AT ALL is concerning. You cannot un-kink-ify it, this is a kink goddamn it and when you stop treating it as such you open up a LOT of unsafe grey areas on top of making it borderline impossible for people who are squicked out by it to avoid it because no one is going to tag for something they think is a harmless, gender-affirming, tgirl approved meme.
Idk tho maybe I'm letting my own dysphoria get in the way, feel free to check me if that's the case I will take the L with grace, but I just feel like this "It's not a kink when I do it" thing is...in poor taste, at the very least. I don't think it's intentionally malicious either I just don't like it when we stop recognizing that a kink is a kink.
I advocate tirelessly for being able to live BDSM relationships in public to the extent that "normal" relationships are allowed, but what I do not do is say I should get to snap a collar around a random girl's neck and drag her off because it's just a lifestyle. Like fuck off with "it's not a kink," IT IS, and it is NON-CON.
My biggest fan can't shut up about me supposedly calling trans women groomers because I think it's bad for trans men to say they want to cure trans women's "comphet," but you know what's also sexually coercive? Shoving your non-con fetish at people, many of whom are going to have reasons to be outright triggered by it, and then call it fine because it's so totally non-sexual.
SATIRE BEGIN
Well, okay, fine, start making indiscriminate forcemasc jokes at women. It's not a kink! There's nothing wrong with being a trans man! How could they possibly complain?
SATIRE END
That's a rhetorical question too, the answer is that they'd be massive hypocrites about it and say some dumbass shit like "transmascs just invented forcemasc to gentrify our fet I MEAN NOT A FETISH" or "trans men shouldn't care about being forcefemmed because there's nothing wrong with it but being a man is Bad."
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feather , part 34
“ where i’m at ”
series m. list previous chapter next chapter
( socialmedia!au )
hockeynewschannel
liked by yourusername and 123,659 others
newschannel1 rookie nhl player, luke hughes of the new jersey devils, and longtime suspected girlfriend are seen out at the beach spending time together!
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username21 no fucking way they got news channels covering this
username78 LMFAOOO
username45 how the hell do you even????
username90 there’s no way they could tell it was them from the BACK
→ username79 prob just couldn’t snap a pic from the front without getting caught
username46 i genuinely think they could give less shits if they’re seen out together
username84 ppl are forgetting they were friends before they started dating 😭
yourusername oh my god i’m famous 😱
→ username42 LMFAOAOAOAO
→ username71 stirring up the drama i see
→ username99 you’re trolling so hard aren’t you
bardown
liked by yourusername, lhughes_06, and 194,901 others
bardown luke hughes or a dupe?
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username1 BARDOWN??? this has got to be jesse there’s no one else who would cover this
username82 even bardown’s roped into the dryshughes rabbit hole 😭
username72 waiting for the next pod to come out and it’s just then talking about the dryshughes lore for an hour straight
liked by bardown
→ bardown soon!
username24 LMFAO IS THAT THE DRUNK LEAKED PHOTO
username36 i’m sorry they did luke so dirty
→ username34 on par with all the other news reports about him 😔😔
username47 THAT’S MY WIFE she’s so hot
username88 but they’re not even canadian 😭
→ username14 they used to live in toronto idk
username8 next quiz idea: state every event to happen in the dryshughes timeline
liked by bardown
username23 next thing i know i’m prob getting a notif from tsn about this shit
tsn_official
liked by yourusername, lhughes_06, and 200,007 others
tsn_official just spotted luke hughes and his girlfriend getting lovey on the ferris wheel
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username23 i just manifested this wtf
username41 GOOD FUCKING BYE
username60 they can’t even say mother’s name i see how it is 🙄🙄
username79 wtf!
username15 since when did tsn and bardown cover romantic relationships in the nhl 😭
→ username2 since dryshughes.
username58 they can’t catch a break holy
username97 let’s just leave them alone 💀💀
username42 they didn’t even wait for the actual hard launch to happen 😭😭
username76 THEY’RE CUTE TOGETHER WHO IS SHE
lhughes_06 damn i thought we were being lowkey about it
→ yourusername ‼️‼️
→ username84 i’m so confused what’s going on
yourusername
liked by lhughes_06, _quinnhughes, njdevils, and 320,155 others
yourusername we had it coming boys…
look at this fucking dumbass (i love him) he looks so stupid (he’s so cute) and he’s so cheesy (he legitimately makes me swoon) AND IF ANY OF YOU TRY AND SHIT ON OUR RELATIONSHIP i’ll thank you! (I WILL BEAT YOU UP)
thank you for coming to my ted talk
tagged: lhughes_06
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lhughes_06 i hate you more (i love you so much) and you’re my least favorite drysdale (you’ll always be my girl)
→ yourusername this is so gross you made me cry fuck you
→ lhughes_06 i think you forgot to add the parentheses
_quinnhughes only took you a decade!
→ yourusername HEY DON’T CALL US OUT
→ lhughes_06 fr that’s so uncoolio
markestapa OH MY GOD I CALLED IT
→ yourusername called what 🤨
→ markestapa mackie’s dumb ass said luke was gonna hard launch first
→ mackie.samo THEY PRACTICALLY POSTED AT THE SAME TIME
→ markestapa BUT SHE POSTED FIRST
→ mackie.samo BY LIKE 10 FUCKING SECONDS
→ markestapa give me my damn money 🙄
maddysamo does this mean samo time gets cut down even more
→ yourusername unfortunately yes…
→ msamoskevich okay then keep breaking my heart 😔
→ mackie.samo stfu samo time is NOT getting cut down
→ lhughes_06 yes tf it will mackie.samo
→ maddysamo YOU ALREADY SPEND ENOUGH TIME WITH HER AS IT IS
njdevils favorite couple by far!
→ lhughes_06 YEAHHH LETS GO
→ yourusername 🤭
colecaufield you chose the worst possible photos of him
→ yourusername i deadass didn’t have any good pics of him
→ colecaufield go on pinterest???
→ yourusername and search up pics of my own boyfriend?? hell no
_alexturcotte ayeeee there we gooo
→ yourusername you were our #1 supporter from the start 🙈
→ trevorzegras THAT IS A FUCKING LIE AND YOU KNOW IT.
adamfantilli oh look he gave you flowers
→ yourusername he gave me flowers 🥰💐
dylanduke25 mini golf
→ yourusername i destroyed him
→ lhughes_06 you didn’t but i love you so i’ll let it slide yourusername
→ dylanduke25 the balls r really small right
→ yourusername yeah…….
→ dylanduke25 maybe that’s why you were so good at it yk, since you got a lot of experience from lukey boy
→ lhughes_06 DUDE STOP
rutgermcgroarty why was bro recording the helicopter
→ lhughes_06 because i wanted to 😔
→ rutgermcgroarty ur such a weirdo
comments on this post have been limited
lhughes_06
liked by yourusername, trevorzegras, edwards.73, and 345,174 others
lhughes_06 just wanted to say i was fucking struggling to keep us a secret and i love you more than the entire universe
tagged: yourusername
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yourusername WHY’D YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE THE WORST PHOTOS OF MEEE
→ lhughes_06 shush you look beautiful
edwards.73 you were not keeping it a secret bro 💀💀
→ lhughes_06 BECAUSE I WAS STRUGGLING
→ edwards.73 yeah we could tell… 😬
mackie.samo that first pic is photo evidence of you selling on chel
→ lhughes_06 IT WAS LITERALLY YOUR FAULT
→ _quinnhughes i was a witness i can attest to your shit playing
→ lhughes_06 😐
luca.fantilli you let her paint ur nails.
→ lhughes_06 IT’S CLEAR
→ luca.fantilli u were shitting on me for wanting to paint stars on my nails
→ lhughes_06 IT WOULD LOOK BAD ON YOU
→ lhughes_06 AND MINES JUST A TOP COAT
→ luca.fantilli SHUT UP HYPOCRITE
jamie.drysdale yeah yeah you look cute but you better not hurt her or else i will hunt you down and i am a hell of a lot closer to you than i was when i was still with the ducks
→ lhughes_05 yes sir 🫡
→ yourusername the paragraph. the fucking paragraph.
→ jamie.drysdale I’M JUST DEFENDING YOUR HONOR
trevorzegras LETS FUCKING GO???
trevorzegras ROOTING FOR YOU SINCE THE START
→ lhughes_05 we thank you for your service
→ yourusername sure you were z
→ _alexturcotte it was obviously me 🙄
jackhughes i bought you all of those films and they were expensive as hell
→ lhughes_06 so was my tooth when you knocked it out of my mouth when I WAS SIX
→ jackhughes IT WAS GONNA COME OUT ANYWAYS
→ _quinnhughes it was not about to come out 💀
→ yourusername you’re rich stop whining about instax films
njdevils that’s our boy!
liked by lhughes_06
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njdevils
liked by lhughes_06, yourusername, dylanduke25, and 356,924 others
njdevils we support you! (as long as she’s cheering us on when we play the flyers 🤫)
tagged: lhughes_06, yourusername
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philadelphiaflyers gritty will not be happy to learn that his favorite player’s sister will be cheering for the other team
liked by njdevils
lhughes_06 ❤️
→ yourusername dry ass comment
username3 SCREAMINGGGG
jamie.drysdale hm.
→ lhughes_06 don’t be salty man
→ yourusername frfrrr
username87 MY BABIES
username41 IT FINALLY FUCKING HAPPENEDDDDD
username56 AHHHH
username68 LOOK AT THEM THEY’RE SO CUTE
username25 FUCK YEAH
username76 HARD LAUNCH OF THE CENTURY
yourusername i’ll make a deal 🫣
→ njdevils let’s hear it
→ yourusername whoever’s playing at home is who i’ll cheer for
→ lhughes_06 no
→ jamie.drysdale no
→ njdevils no
→ philadelphiaflyers no
username44 YESSSS
next chapter notes ) HARD LAUNCH OF THE CENTURY?? YES OR YES????? and also i’m so pumped from the stars’ 9-2 thursday win and we finally got our hard launchhhhh
tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot @absolutelyhugh3s @jackquinnswife @freds-slut @love4ldr @blueeyedbesson @43hughes @v1olentdelights @dancerbailey3 @random-human02 @ho3forfakeguys@loveforaugust@cstads-blog@h0e4fictionalme-n
#luke hughes fanfic#luke hughes fic#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes x y/n#luke hughes#jack hughes#quinn hughes#alex turcotte#trevor zegras#cole caufield#jamie drysdale#rutger mcgroarty#adam fantilli#luca fantilli#mark estapa#dylan duke#mackie samoskevich#ethan edwards
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Tommy is a dumbass, but Buck loves him anyways.
Just because it seems warranted on tonight of all nights, I'm sharing a bit of my current WIP. This was all written before tonight's episode, so it doesn't match up with canon.
Subject to change before it gets posted to AO3 because I'm trying this crazy thing where I actually write the whole fic before I start posting chapters.
-------------
Tommy threw the strap of his duffle bag over his shoulder and wearily trudged up the front steps of his house, ready to sleep and wallow for the next two days until it was time to go back on shift.
He went to unlock his front door and paused as the handle turned easily in his hand. He wasn’t the type to forget to lock up and it didn’t look like the door had been forced. He cautiously pushed the door open and eased into the house. He set down his bag carefully and grabbed the baseball bat he kept propped next to the door. (Look, his neighborhood was safe enough, but this was LA and weird shit happened all the time.)
Gripping the baseball bat tightly, Tommy made his way down the front hallway, ear cocked for the noise of intruders. As he approached the living room, the sounds of a baseball game on the tv got louder.
“Goddamit, he was safe,” a familiar voice shouted, and Tommy eased up his grip on the bat. He set it down as he walked into his living room and spotted Eddie stretched out on his couch, a bottle of his beer in hand as he watched the Rangers losing to the Cubs.
“Diaz,” he said, “What the fuck are you doing in my house?”
“Kinard,” Eddie snarked back in return. “Just stopping by to see if you were going senile in your old age. See, my best friend, Buck, you remember him? Came to my house with a hilarious story about you trying to dump him. Given the fact I had to drag you past that jewelry store when you started staring at engagement rings in the window the last time we went out to catch a movie, I find it a little hard to believe.” Eddie took long drink of his beer as he cocked an eyebrow at Tommy.
Tommy huffed and stalked out of the room to go to the kitchen. If he’s going to do this, he’s at least going to have a beer. He yanked open the door of his fridge with a little too much force, knocking a few magnets loose and sending a handful of pictures to drift to the floor. He grabs a beer and sets in on the counter before bending down to pick up the photos.
Evan and him in a beach selfie, a shot of Tommy and Evan on either side of Christopher from the first time Tommy tagged along to the zoo, a photo of the 118 in their Halloween Fest finery and a shot of Tommy swinging Jee around in Bobby and Athena’s backyard. He stacks them neatly and places them next to his beer on the counter.
He wants to put them back up, where they belong. But they don’t really belong there now that he told Evan goodbye. He picks up the stack again and opens the junk drawer. He closes the drawer again and then sets the pile face down to be dealt with later. He grabs his beer and heads back to his living room and his ex-boyfriend’s best friend.
Eddie is still shouting at the tv when he returns. He waits until Tommy sits down next to him to pout, “Where’s my beer?”
“You invited yourself, you can get your own damn beer,” Tommy growls. He makes a point of relaxing back into the couch and keeps his eyes trained on the tv. “How’d you get in anyways?” Tommy would have remembered giving Eddie a key.
“Switched keys with Buck.”
Tommy turns to look at Eddie, confused. “Then how did Evan drive home?”
“Man, other then the key for your house and one for Maddie’s place, 99% of our keys are the same. I have the spare for the Jeep and he has the spare for the truck in case one of us gets locked out.”
Tommy shakes his head at this new revelation. “Anyone ever tell you how weirdly codependent you two are?”
“We are not codependent, we are practical and efficient,” Eddie said in an affronted tone.“Besides, where’s your spare key for the truck?” he asked, his smirk communicating that he already knew the answer.
“With Evan,” Tommy confirmed. “Which means you currently have it. You should give me those keys before you leave.”
“Nope. You’re going to have to talk to Buck if you want your keys back,” Eddie said.
“We could trade, Buck’s house key for mine?” Tommy tried.
“No deal. If Buck doesn’t want you to have a key, he’ll ask for it back. Besides, half of LA has keys to Buck’s place at this point.”
“What?” Tommy said, surprise in his voice.
“Well, dude gets hurt so often and usually doesn’t have a partner to help out so everybody pitches in. Off the top of my head there’s me, Maddie, Bobby, Hen, Chim, Albert, Ravi, May, Chris of course, Carla, and there’s a spare at the firehouse on the master key ring. Oh, and the neighbors across the hall have a key.”
“Why would the neighbors need a key?”
“Buck locked himself out one time taking out the trash on the super’s night off so he asked Rose and Ethel to keep a key just in case. Worked out, because they don’t mind watering his plants when he’s in the hospital for more then a few days.”
“Rose and Ethel? Does he live across the hall from septuagenarians?”
Eddie huffed, “Worse, trust fund babies. But they’re harmless. I’m surprised you haven’t met them yet.”
“Wait, does one of them have a septum piercing and the other one has pink hair?”
“Ironically, Rose is the one with the piercing. Anyways, stop trying to distract me and answer the damn question. What the hell, Kinard?” Eddie speared him with a piercing stare.
“I could kick you out,” Tommy said under his breath, although apparently not quiet enough.
“You could try,” Eddie scoffed.
Tommy side-eyed Eddie. He knew he could take the slighter man, but he also knew he didn’t want to. He wasn’t quite ready to give up on the friendships he’d made or rekindled through his connection to Evan. Sure, Eddie was acting in his role as Evan’s best friend right now, but they had their own relationship.
“Why are you here?” Tommy asked, frustration evident. He hadn’t expected that Eddie would want anything to do with him after he had broken up with Evan and he’d tried to make his peace with that.
“My friend is being a dumbass, where else would I be? Seriously, man, what’s going on?” Eddie asked, and Tommy wants to talk about it, but he can’t trust it will stay between them.
That was always the problem with his friendship with Eddie, it included Evan. He got that they were a package deal, and when he and Evan were good that wasn’t a problem. But now, he couldn’t just unload on Eddie and not expect it to get back to Evan.
“I’m not talking to you about this. I get that you want to help, but this is between me and Evan.” He tried to resist asking, but the curiosity won out. “What did he tell you?”
“Just that you blindsided him and started talking about taking some time apart, that he needed to get out there and explore his “sexuality” and how you didn’t want to hold him back. At least, that’s what I could make out before he doom spiraled and started dissecting the past month to figure out what he had done wrong.” Eddie narrowed his eyes at him. “You know he was expecting you to ask him to move in at that dinner, right?”
And Tommy can see how Evan might have come to that conclusion when he’d asked him over. They’d been together 8 months and Evan spent more nights at Tommy’s then at his own loft. Evan bought groceries and brought them to his house so he could try out new recipes and he’d started hinting about how the backyard was big enough for a dog and Tommy had realized that half the laundry he’d folded last week had belonged to Evan.
And he could see it, his future with Evan. A shared home, a supportive group of family and friends, hosting Thanksgiving because Evan really wants to deep fry a turkey and no one will let him try it at their homes. Marriage and kids and pets and joy. An end to the search, an end to being alone, the beginning of the rest of his life.
And he panicked. Because 8 months ago Evan thought he was straight, he’d never kissed a man other then Tommy and one day he was going to wake up and realize that he settled for the first guy to make a move on him. And then he’d resent Tommy and it would be the beginning of the end.
So instead of asking Evan to move in, he’d sent him away. At least, he’d tried to.
He’d stumbled through a standard break up speech, the kind of thing he’d heard dozens of times during his life. It’s not you, it’s me. This is moving too fast. I think we should take some time apart, explore our options.
And Evan had frowned at him, his brow furrowed as if Tommy was speaking a foreign language. He’d stuttered out a “Wh-what the fuck are you talking about?”midway through Tommy’s speech and then as Tommy kept trying to make him understand he’d started laughing. He’d actually patted the back of Tommy’s hand and said simply “No.”
It had stopped Tommy in his tracks. “No? You can’t refuse a breakup, Evan,” Tommy had said.
“Sure I can. I’m going to go and let you have your ‘time apart’ but this is not finished between us, Kinard.” And then he’d left and apparently headed straight for Eddie.
“Earth to Kinard,” Eddie snarked at him. “You want to spill what’s going through that fat head of yours? Because I, for one, can’t believe you are fumbling this. And I thought Buck was the idiot in your relationship.”
Tommy felt a growl in his chest at the insult to Evan, no matter how lovingly offered. Evan was not an idiot, he was brilliant. He was smart and funny and warm and so open and he was going to destroy him when he left. So Tommy left first.
“Eddie, I mean this with love, but leave it the fuck alone. You can stay if you want, catch the rest of the game but I am not talking about this with you.”
Eddie shrugged, “All right, bro. Just be prepared for your man to go full Buck on you.” He chuckled as he toasted Tommy with the dregs of his beer. He got up to grab another from the kitchen.
“I don’t know what that means,” Tommy yelled after him. “What does that even mean?” he muttered under his breath.
#bucktommy#tevan#evan buck buckely#eddie diaz#tommy kinard#911 on abc#wip#Tommy Kinard has relationship trauma
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HEYO Y'ALL!!!! I got bored and decided my last intro post was WAY too unorganised (even by my standards frfr 😔😔🙏) so i made a new one!!! hopefully this ones a bit better or else ima light somebody on fire 🥰🥰
anyways dms n asks r ALWAYS open and if ur new to my person/being/blog/existancewhatevs and wanna get to know me or smth then FEEL FREE TO SLIDE IN GIRLYPOPS!!! I'M ALWAYS BORED SOO 😭😭🙏 (might take like, a billion years to reply tho mbmb >:3)
and thus again, without any further ado, MY INTRO POST 😍
🎶 try to strike a chord but it's probably A MINOR 🎶 -> ✨️im under 18✨️ idm nsfw convos tho bcuz theyre funny :D
sooo tbh you can call me whatever you want? like ppl call me different things (eg senka calls me kam, bea calls me keke/kekere bcuz shes 🎶a meanie, a big meanie🎶 my irl bestie westie pookie poo calls me jeena CUZ HES A LIL BITCH) but MHM!!! CALL ME WHATEVER U WANNA <33 (as long as it dont feel masc bcuz my dumbass got issues w feeling masc for some RANDOM STUPID REASON 💀) (like im literally a cis girl why do i got problems w this....... but YAAAA 😭) (she/her btw!!! if that wasnt obvious!! ^^)
✨️i am cringe but i am free✨️
I SOMETIMES USE GENDERED TERMS LIKE GIRLY/BRO/DUDE/ETC BUT I DON'T MEAN IT GENDERED SO IF YOU FEEL IFFY THEN DONT HESITATE TO HMU N TELL ME TO FIX UP MY SHIT
btw im a tad bit of train wreck but if u enjoy the chaos then we'll get along js fine i think pooks 😋😋
anyways it came to my shitty little attention span one day when i was just being a silly lil girly that some of yall think im white when i say im british....... CHAT NOOO IM BORN N RAISED IN THIS TEA RIDDEN COUNTRY BUT ETHNICITY WISE IM BANGLADESHI!??!?! YALL IM LITERALLY A BROWNIE OMFDS 🤧
also a lot of this blog is a bunch of reblogs of shit im interested in BUT I DO HAVE OG STUFFFFFF, THEY'RE JUST IN THEIR OWN TAGS U GET ME??? anyways some of the tags!!!
karmaajr rambles -> for everything i post besides answers to asks :3
karmaajr answers ig :D -> answers to asks ^^
important thing for me to tag bcuz yes -> random thing i really wanna save (also im bad at tagging so sometimes thing has an "s" or tag has an "s" lmfao, ITS A RLLY USELESS TAG TO TRY SCROLL THRU ICL.... RLLY DRY AS WELL)
karmas mum mentions :3 -> i like to think this one explains itself yall 😘
daddy's unhinged -> anything about my sweet ol' pops (who totes cares abt me yall) 🥰
my sister and I -> anything my sister is involved in that i actually remember to tag LMFAO
NOT MY ASS MENTIONING PANIK -> me wanting to save things that r to do w my gf 🫶
BTW HIS @ IS @panikbutt0n AND SHE'S MY MAPLE SYRUP CHUGGING 4LIFER AND LITERALLY THE BEST THING SINCE RIPPED BREAD AND I LOVE HER SO SO SO MUCH SO ACC HIT HER UP PLZ 🙏🙏🙏🙏
btw yall, ur homegirl aint no gatekeeper so the group matching pfp thingy is from @tuturthecarvroom 's blog (n they very skibidi sbg art btw so i do reccomend frfr) and mY HEADER IS OFF GOOGLE SEARCH 😍😍
ALSO I AM CURRENTLY MATCHING WITH THE SILLIEST GROUP EVER FRFR, GONNA TRY @ THEM ALL BUT IT'S HARDDD (my memory is the shittiest thing since That One Time my friend shit his trousers on call w me 💪💪💪)
@lee1504 -> BRAINROTTED KING 🙏🙏
@d011zk1ll -> both kind af and somewhat unhinged??? like both "do a good deed to make somebody else's life easier ☺️" AND "im gonna eat a bicycle :p"
@sketchingwithlyn -> JUST THE CHILLEST GUY EVERRRR!!!!
@rot-decay-erosion -> gramps 🧓🏻 (also known as the desendant of our king garfield 😙✨️)
@afrogwhocantdraw -> RESIDENT BENLOR POOKIE
@low-senka -> the brokest senior citezen youve ever met 💔💔💔💔 (yall need to donate to my guy 🥺🥺🥺)
(also the thing below had me stuck looking at it for literally AGES so hehehehehhehehe GET TRAPPED IDIOT!!!!!! >:3!!!!!)
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(dots r fun)
anyways i have no clue what else to write!!! which is weird bcuz im a yapper frfr :D
ANYWAYS LOVE Y'ALL ✨️✨️✨️
WAIT
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THEY 👥 DONT🙅🏼♀️ LOVE 😘 YOU 🫵🏼 LIKE I 👀 LOVE 🥰 YOU 🫵🏼🫵🏼🫵🏼
#karmaajr rambles#important thing for me to tag bcuz yes#karmaajr answers ig :D#karmas mum mentions :3#my sister and i#daddy's unhinged#NOT MY ASS MENTIONING PANIK#anyways please tell me i did good on this yall 🙏🙏🙏🙏#yall i did good right-#PLSSS#CHAT 🙏🙏
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