#it’s not even just that job asked questions but that Crowley is amazed that he was ‘able to’ like they’re just astonished job could

[lesbianballofgender]

During the time of Job when Crowley is ✨Bildad The Shuhite✨ they watch Job talk to God and say ‘But just to be able to ask the question’ which, looking back, is such a huge thing for him to say considering that asking questions is implied to be THE REASON they had their fall…

Brb gonna go cry for him

[calcifiedunderland]

Shrimply Yours~

In which you invoke your shrimp privileges to cheer Floyd up.

Floyd x GN Reader! Enjoy, shrimpies!!~

—————

“Y’know Floyd, I’d say you’re the shrimp, not me.”

Maybe you really did have a death-by-squeezing wish. Or maybe your plot-armor protection had finally worn off. The eel in question lifted his head slowly at your words and side-eyed you, his golden eye glinting ominously in the Mostro Lounge kitchen’s light.

You’d been washing the dishes after asking Azul for a job in exchange for a little extra madol on the side. For the most part, your day had been as peaceful as it could’ve (the life of a magicless prefect was always maniacal), until you heard arguing from outside the kitchen. You all but jumped when Floyd slammed the door open and wordlessly stalked to the stove, and you spotted Azul walking off shaking his head to himself. Floyd shoved pan on the heat and began frying something, completely ignoring your presence. Was it even possible to fry chicken so aggressively?

In any case, Floyd seemed a little more volatile than usual at the moment, even considering it was him. The other students who’d been in the kitchen with you before had scuttled out before Floyd could snap at them too. But in any case, you knew that Floyd’s mood flipped faster than Crowley leaving all his work to you. So, you thought you’d try to lighten the mood.

At your words, Floyd slowly brought his head up from his deep-frying, golden-and-olive colored eyes zeroing in on you, baring his sharp, shiny teeth at you in a scowl. And in that split second, you suddenly remembered that Floyd was, in fact, a mer-eel. Moray, specifically. A predator. A predator that probably ate shrimpies like you. Who was now looking at you predatorily.

“What did ya just say, shrimpy?” His pupils were practically pin-pricks, and for a moment you swore you could hear the Jaws theme song in your head. You could remember, time and time again, your friends and upperclassmen telling you not to engage Floyd when he was in one of his moods. Even up until now, you’d never been on the awful end of his anger, especially alone. But you weren’t called beast-tamer for nothing, damn it, and maybe that title could extend to taming angry Floyd’s too. An angry Floyd that was still your friend.

“I said, you’re the shrimp, not me.” You maintained eye-contact with him, almost challenging him, ‘come at me, bro.’ You tried to keep a straight face, although you were deflating rapidly by the second because by Sevens this was so stupid but-

“Because you’re shrimply amazing.”

One second passed. Two. Three.

Then Floyd broke into a wide, sharp-toothed grin. He surged towards you, completely forgetting the frying food. “D’awww, SHRIMPY!!!”

He swooped behind you, wrapping his arms around you and picking you up. Your legs flailed around and now your arms were locked in as Floyd spun around the kitchen haphazardly with you in his arms. “Shrimpy knows just how to cheer me up! I knew this is why I kept you around!” He laughed cheerily, bobbing you up and down.

“FLOYD!” You cried, “PUT ME DOWN-“ the kitchen swirled crazily around you, as Floyd babbled some song or other cheerfully. Thankfully he’d stopped spinning, but began shaking you side to side while humming, “Shrimpy’s so brave n’ nice, all the other guppies left when they saw me but only Shrimpy stayed!”

He started pouting, and squished his cheek into yours. “Azul was bein’ mean to me, making me work now. Just ‘cause I roughed up a few customers doesn’t mean it was my fault! They shoulda been nice to me~”

Even though you were basically suspended in the air by him, you smiled at Floyd’s words. “Glad I could help Floyd, that was so mean of Azul,” you consoled him, hoping he’d put you down. He bent over until your feet were safely on the sweet, sweet ground, but didn’t let you go from his arms. The two of you swayed together, basking in each other’s company in the subpar lighting of the kitchen, until you frowned.

“…Hey, is something burning?”

“Ah shit, I burned the chicken.”

———

[inuiiwonderland]

Twisted captivity

Chapter 5

Twst third years x fem reader

Words: 850

A/n: I am SO not back on my grind….very sorry for a LATE and SHORT chapter😖😖

-

Curse Crowley and curse your parents for encouraging you to get this job.

You were up ALL night reading and going through the stacks of papers Crowley so graciously gave you the other day.

Only getting a good 2 hours worth of sleep before hearing your alarm going off.

Damn you crowley

You forcefully slammed open the heavy doors of the Octavinelle enclosure. Bucket of fish in your right hand while your left held your bag that had all your books, journals and your own food.

Your jaw drops at the sight of octavinelle. The whole area had a beautiful blue glow as waterfalls and caves came into view.

“How the hell is he able to afford all of this??” You say to no one in particular. You continue to look around in awe as you put down the bucket and your bag. Unaware of the mismatched eyes watching you, you quickly grab your journal and pen.

“I say Crowley did an amazing job designing this whole thing…or maybe crewel!” You continue to mumble to yourself. The sudden sound of water Splashing and the feeling of cold water hitting your back brought you back as you gasp and quickly turn around.

“What the-“ Your eyes go wide as you see the one responsible for throwing water at you. He cackles as he points at you. You frown as you watch the mer- or eel?? Continue to laugh at you.

“Not very funny” The eel stops and tilts his head before opening his mouth.

“Funny. Very”

Ah so he knows how to speak

“You must beeee” You try to remember the name of the eel in front of you. After all, you were up all night studying everyone's files.

“Floyd!” The eel smiles in delight. Showing off rows of razor sharp teeth as he nods.

“Ah and if I remember correctly, you have a twin?” He smiles even wider at the mention of his twin brother.

“Jade!”

“Right” before you can ask any more questions, he quickly dives back underwater.

“Wait! I still have one more question…” You sulk at the amount of times you've been ignored by the mers in this facility.

And father said this was supposed to be a fun job

Another splash of water caught your attention. You look up to see Floyd but this time he wasn’t alone.

“Jade!” He points. The other eel that looks almost identical to his brother eyed you in curiosity. He then smiles as he waves. You awkwardly wave back as Floyd just looks excited.

“Anyways…I brought food!” And just like that, almost all of the mers that were hiding came up at the mention of food. You gasp as everyone comes out of their hiding spots.

“Sevens you guys must be hungry” you mumble out as you grab the bucket and start feeding them.

After you made sure everyone had their fair share of food, you look down at the bucket to see you still had some extra.

“Hey floyd” he perks up at the mention of his name. He turns to you and tilts his head. Curious.

“Is there anyone else who needs to be fed? I still have some extra” He thinks for a moment before quickly diving back down. Seconds later he comes back up with someone squirming against his hold.

“Azul! He’s hungry!” The octo mer that was just struggling moments ago stops before his whole face turns blue.

He must feel embarrassed

“There’s no need to be embarrassed. If I’m being honest I’m hungry too but I have a few more hours until my lunch break” You say with a sigh. He slowly turns to look at you as you hand him his food. He looks at your hands and then you before quickly grabbing it and swimming back down.

“Is he a shy one?” You ask.

“Very” You giggle before looking at the watch on your wrist.

“Well it was nice meeting you guys. But unfortunately it’s time for me to go” As you stand up, you feel a webbed hand clasp on your wrist. You turn to see that it was Floyd. He wore a frown as he tried to pull you back down.

“Uhh can you let me go? Please?” The eel mer just stared at you and you tried to pull his hand away but it was no use. He was strong.

“Floyd” He quickly lets go when he hears jades voice. The two seem to talk in their language before Floyd rolls his eyes and dives back down underwater. Jade gives you an apologetic smile before doing the same.

You stood there for a good minute before remembering an important piece of information that you read in Floyd’s file.

Name: Floyd leech

Eel mer

Background Information - Him and Jade have been separated from their parents since they were young. Floyd gets very attached to female keepers as he sometimes views them as his mother.

Poor boy

You let out a heavy sigh as you gather your things.

Next stop, Pomefiore

-

Taglist!!! -

@ruisann

@roseapov

@0ffth3rec0rd

@anunholyabomination

@owodi

@mochi-lover26

@coffee-or-hot-cocoa

@Floevi

@thatpersonuouknow

@h0rr0r-10ver-69

[curiouspupsicle]

Good Omens Fan Fiction Friday (1/31/25) - Resistance!!

Being a well informed American living under an administration determined to dismantle our democracy (already stressed) and cause as much damage as possible has even my comfort moments turning to resistance. After all, evil people have always existed. And good people have always resisted. So is there anything my Good Omens fixation has to say about resistance? Given Terry Pratchett's moral universe, we could argue that all of Good Omens is steeped in resistance. But I'm going to limit myself to a few specific favorite fics that highlight different forms of resistance.

Let's start with the series that got me thinking in this direction: Demon and Angel Professors (G) by Ghostinthehouse (@ineffableghost). This is 200 ficlets, each exactly 666 words, hanging on a silly premise. Everyone loves literature Professor Fell who goes on regular tangents about his sweet husband Anthony. Everyone fears grumpy botany Professor Crowley who treats his students like he treats his plants. And anytime Crowley goes near Fell, the first-year students go into protective mode. Because surely Crowley must be up to no good and a potential harm to dear Prof Fell and his precious Anthony. But beyond that bit of fun repeated every year with a new group of incoming students are amazing stories of resistance against those who would cause mental harm or physical violence to disabled people, folks with a variety of gender identities and presentations, queer individuals, people dealing with trauma--basically anyone who might be vulnerable in a thoughtless and even wicked society.

Sometimes resistance is persuading someone to do better. Other times it's offering a hint that makes someone think. It may involve a hands-on approach to someone who only knows violence. Or it may be getting someone to a safe place as quickly as possible.

I read it over a weekend. But I think there's a better approach to reading this long series--bookmark it in your phone when you are doing a hurry-up-and-wait activity (jury duty, medical treatments, picking up kids at school, etc.). The short length of each fic makes it easy to pick up and put down. The variety of "ducklings" tales (what the ineffable pair call the students they help) will keep you interested. And the sense of joy and hope will make it a good way to spend time on a challenging day. Resistance fics aren't all human AUs. Check out The Last Angel (E) by @bellisima-writes. For millennia, Crowley has been Hell's Grand Inquisitor. He never served on earth. After Hell won their war against Heaven, they finally track down the last remaining Angel, Aziraphale. Crowley's given the job of torturing him for information. I don't want to give too much away. But Crowley's form of resistance involves being true to himself no matter what Hell demands. And Aziraphale has a more direct form of resistance planned. It's an exciting read as well as thought-provoking.

@snae-b writes the kind of fics you don't want to start reading before bed--at least not if you plan on getting up early the next day. Echo (E) is no exception. Each day, barista Aziraphale wakes up and goes into work. He serves a chauffeur, Crowley, who seems strangely familiar. Asking questions like "what makes one human" and "how do you fight against an evil activity that no one knows about," Echo is also just a plain old compelling story. And a resistance tale that, despite its futuristic setting, would not feel out of place beside a tale of the French underground resisting Nazis.

Mutual Aid (T) by malicegeres predates the Good Omens tv show. So presumably that makes it part of the Book!Omens universe. In it, radical bookseller Ezra Fell ends up hiding anarchist Crowley from the police after he's injured by skinheads. As the title indicates, they find a common cause and start working together. Loved the depiction of Adam as a leader. And the fic includes a listing of leftist political resources at the end.

Many consider The False and the Fair (E) by @princip1914 to be one of the best human AUs in the Good Omens universe. I certainly do. Aziraphale Wright's family runs a coal mine. Anthony Crowley, his former best friend, is the son of a mine worker. I don't want to spoil the story if you haven't read it. But what appears to be a story of regrets and making amends has a strong thread of accountability that results in wrongs being made right after a powerful act of resistance (with some help from the press). If you haven't read it, check it out. And if you have, read it again--with an eye towards resistance.

Finally, I'll end with a WIP, Good Works (E) by @majnoonathelibrarian. Set in 1987, Aziraphale is an assistant parliamentary secretary in the Thatcher government who finds something strange in the documents he's handling. Crowley is a mysterious "fixer" for a consulting firm who finds himself drawn into queer activism. Both of them have to navigate their day jobs along with increasing activism in a couple of different streams. The characterization is fascinating and the writer strings out the mysteries through the tale. This WIP is regularly updated and nearly complete. Remember, the fan fic community is a COMMUNITY. So don't forget to encourage writers of works underway by leaving kudos and comments. Writers are a gift to fans and we need to show them our appreciation. Finally, I'll give my pitch as someone who has been around much longer than most of you reading this. The yucky things happening in the world can be overwhelming. But it's a backlash. Because we've already made so much progress (both The False and the Fair and Good Works are good reminders of just how deadly the 1980s were for queer people). So resist. By making art and telling stories. By protesting. By contacting the people in power making decisions you disagree with. By caring for the vulnerable. By speaking out at local political meetings. By amplifying the voices of marginalized people. By using any of your unearned benefits to advocate for others. And by just existing as the beautiful and unique individual you are.

[vidavalor]

Why do you think Crowley didn't just get another apartment?

Hi! Thanks for the ask. I have French buttercream chocolate cake tonight. I know, right? It's amazing. *cuts you a slice*

To answer your question, I think we have to look at the whole thing with where Crowley parks The Bentley and when (in both seasons) and, also, the scenes that emphasize Crowley and Aziraphale avoiding being seen together anywhere in the mornings and what all this has to do with what he says is his living situation in S2.

Meta on Crowley "living in his car" in S2 under the cut.

For Crowley and Aziraphale, what has always been what *absolutely cannot happen* is Heaven/Hell figuring out that Crowley will stay in the bookshop until very, very late into the evening, as that is the one thing they'd have trouble justifying. If Crowley parked The Bentley in front of the bookshop in the afternoon/evening and it was still there at 7am the next morning, it would send a message to anyone watching that their relationship isn't just intelligence business, it's not just friendship...and it's not even really just sex. If Heaven/Hell saw The Bentley outside the bookshop all night often enough, they would assume that Crowley and Aziraphale are in a romantic relationship and this is the one thing that Crowley and Aziraphale do not want them to figure out. They can hatch a wild plan if they get caught to justify any of the rest of it and maybe get away with it but there's no way out if they get caught out being in love when they're supposed to be sworn enemies... so, if they want to spend time alone together in the privacy of the bookshop, how do they work around the problem of potentially being noticed? The show actually showed us subtly in S1 before a little more overtly in S2.

When Crowley is going to come over for awhile-- and especially when it's going to mean that he's there into the evening-- he doesn't park The Bentley in front of the bookshop. He parks it in the vicinity but not too close-- around where it was when Aziraphale called him in 2.01. Two or so minutes' drive out, on a side street. (A two minute drive is a 15 or so minute walk so not that far but a bit away.) If he's coming to the shop alone, he'll probably use the side entrance to the bookshop but if he's been out with Aziraphale-- like he was in their 'fuck everything, the world is ending' lunch at The Ritz in 2008-- they'll walk back to the bookshop. If anyone notices Crowley entering it, it'll be during the day, right? While not ideal, it's innocuous enough. Aziraphale's bookshop is theoretically a business and is also an angelic embassy and Aziraphale could say that he's trying to turn Crowley to the light and make him into an informant if they were caught. Conversely, it couldn't hurt Crowley-- whose job, like Aziraphale's, is to spy on his counterpart-- to seem like he's gaming the corruptible angel and getting intel to further the demonic goals of Hell so he could say he's luring the angel to trusting him. Being in the bookshop during the day, during what are (for normal businesses lol) business hours, when the business is also an embassy, is one thing. It's the evening that's the problem for them. At that time of day, the bookshop is nothing but Aziraphale's residence and Crowley's presence during those hours becomes much riskier. So, how to get around that?

Here's them walking back to the bookshop from wherever Crowley's parked The Bentley on a side street after lunch in 2008/Eleven Years Ago in S1:

During lunch in 2008, they already planned for Crowley to come back to the bookshop with Aziraphale and since there's no plan for him to leave in any hurry, Crowley is already not parked in front of the bookshop so no one can recognize his car there late at night. This is practiced between them; they've been doing it for awhile by this point. They still are in S2, when we have several scenes of Crowley in The Bentley parked on a side street near the bookshop.

Since Crowley can't be seen then leaving the bookshop once the sun is up or it'd defeat the purpose of the car not being parked in front of it, whenever he comes over, he leaves the bookshop through the side door at some ungodly pre-dawn hour, walks to his car a few streets over (apparating into it would be suspicious to anyone who might have found it so he usually walks, looking like he was just out late causing demonic trouble), and then, in the past, would drive back to his apartment in Mayfair. That way, when the sun came up, anyone who might be watching his place would see The Bentley parked in front of it. Didn't see Crowley leave the bookshop from the afternoon? You must have missed him in a crowd on the sidewalk somewhere because there's his gorgeous, old, very recognizable car, parked in front of his place in Mayfair, gleaming in that early morning sun.

No one was ever the wiser to the fact that on some of these nights, Crowley was not home in his apartment or out raising hell all night but was actually in the bookshop nearly until dawn.

Is it kind of miserable for Crowley to have to leave every time in the middle of the night and for him and Aziraphale to never really know what it's like to wake up together? To never get to have breakfast and mornings together? Of course. But it keeps them safe so they deal with it. As a result, though, they have a thing about mornings.

In 1.01, when Crowley calls Aziraphale in the middle of the night and they both have separately learned of Armageddon, he tells Aziraphale that they "need to talk" and then they both, without further discussion, are at their bench in St. James' Park the next day. During their talk, they decide to go to lunch and go directly there, which means that they met up sometime around 11am-12pm. So even Crowley calling in the middle of the night and setting up the meeting in the park with their code phrase means that the time of the meeting is always predetermined to be at least 11am, no matter what they need to discuss. Even after learning of Armageddon beginning, they waited until almost lunch the next day to meet up and talk about it because they never want to be seen in public together in the earlier mornings. They're afraid of someone seeing them going for a walk or getting a coffee together before midday and thinking they spent the previous night together. Crowley is always gone from the bookshop before the sun starts to come up and they never meet before 11am in an effort to keep anyone from figuring out that they are often in the bookshop-- and Aziraphale's bed-- together through the early morning hours.

Which tends to make this, their first time getting breakfast even if Crowley knew it wasn't really that because Aziraphale's "problem voice" was on, even more hilarious...

Crowley's like I left you blissed out and half-asleep in your bed *four hours ago*, angel... how on Earth is there a 'naked man friend' in your bookshop right now? He knows that Shax told him there's something going on and that Aziraphale called with a problem but this is the only time of day they usually spend apart and they always do so if Aziraphale is going to cheat on him-- which he's not lol-- this is when he would and based on the fact that Aziraphale panics at Crowley thinking there's another guy in the bookshop and based on Crowley's wtf? face at hearing there is, these two aren't sleeping with anyone else anymore and have a monogamous thing, even if they probably sort of forgot to have a discussion about it. Crowley can tell from Aziraphale's reaction that there's some misunderstanding here and then just gets bemused about it but also about ready to kill whatever guy, naked or not, is causing Aziraphale problems, only to find out that it's, well, the guy who tried to kill them.

In 2.01, when Gabriel makes his rather noticeable arrival on Aziraphale's doorstep, it is the mid-part of the morning-- probably somewhere around 9am as Maggie was just getting ready to open her store for the day, Nina was still busy but her more immediate pre-work coffee rush seemed to be winding down, and Aziraphale was having his breakfast tea on yet another day that his shop was not opening lol. The most major character to miss Gabriel's arrival is, of course, Crowley. Crowley's meeting with Shax is just before/happening in tandem with Aziraphale at Maggie's shop and then Gabriel's arrival and actually opens the storyline in the present in S2. The point is that Crowley misses Gabriel's arrival because he is not in the bookshop in the early mornings, which is then something that is heavily emphasized through Crowley and Aziraphale's first scene of the season via Nina to not just be about this particular early morning but all mornings.

When Aziraphale calls Crowley and has him meet him in Give Me Coffee, Nina has never met Crowley before. Give Me Coffee is fifteen steps across the street from the bookshop and sells coffee, tea and baked goods and Nina doesn't know Crowley. Nina has been there running it since post-S1. She knows Aziraphale though and, until the morning of 2.01, she thought the old bookseller a confirmed bachelor. In the span of 20 minutes, he gets a naked man possible deliveroo strippergram on his doorstep in front of the whole neighborhood and then then this other hot-- and surprisingly clothed-- Ginger Goth guy shows up to meet him for coffee. Nina's best guess for why the bookseller and his Crowley have never come across the street to her shop before and seem like they've literally never gotten breakfast together while they also "go way back" and have chemistry and affection for one another for days is that they're having an affair. Nina correctly guesses that their relationship is a secret and applies the most logical presumption that a human without knowledge of Heaven/Hell could-- that it's infidelity, not that they could be murdered if they were found out-- because these two live in London Soho in the year 2023 but are still afraid of being found out.

So, all of this shows how there's no Crowley in the bookshop in the morning. Neither of them have ever slipped across the street to bring back coffee and croissants for two at 7am or gone over to Nina's together. Aziraphale has been to Give Me Coffee alone before. Crowley and The Bentley are always nowhere to be found near the bookshop at this hour, which is how Crowley missed Gabriel's arrival.

So what does this all have to do with why Crowley doesn't just get a new apartment ahead of S2?

When Hell showed up in the form of Shax to reclaim the place in Mayfair in which Crowley was living, it really left Crowley with two choices. He wasn't about to tell Aziraphale because Aziraphale would feel like he had to ask him to move in with him for real and it was too dangerous. They can't have that so why bring it up and hurt them more? The two choices Crowley felt he had were to either get a new apartment or to just keep on as he's been living because the truth is... he hadn't been home to Mayfair that much lately anyway.

Before, Crowley and Aziraphale would try to go some amount of time between seeing each other but after S1, maybe with some exceptions around the Covid lockdowns but definitely not since they were lifted, they just stopped bothering that much. They were already together on borrowed time with no idea how much time they had until Armageddon: Round Two would start and they just wanted to be together so they kept up their whole routine of Crowley out before dawn and no mornings but Crowley had been more or less living in the bookshop for awhile ahead of S2.

As Aziraphale says here:

Meaning: they live together. Crowley's there all the time. Aziraphale does not mind. It's been months of Crowley in the bookshop every night. Aziraphale loves it. He hates him having to leave in the middle of the night as he always does but they've settled into a little domestic thing the best they can with the situation they have. The line is also laden with innuendo, suggesting they're not always just up talking and listening to old records until 4am but are regularly, ya know, setting off some alarm bells in Heaven together. (Couple Aziraphale's innuendo in the "plenty of use" scene with why Crowley says Muriel needs to leave the bookshop when he says he wants to take Aziraphale to breakfast at The Ritz. "We need a little 'us time'" meant all amnesiac angels and assorted representatives of Heaven and Hell need to get the Someplace out of this bookshop right now so I can finally watch that angel eat some pancakes and then take him to bed in our bed without worrying about someone needing a hot chocolate in the middle of the night.)

Their level of domesticity is actually shown to be pretty cute with this bit:

This is the most living together thing ever because it's saying that Crowley is just frequently in the bookshop while Aziraphale is out now. He's not even just there to see him but he spends time there alone while Aziraphale goes to the bank for change for the four books he sells a month and to his appointment with his barber and all his other little errands. You know Crowley likes waiting inside because he likes having a little time alone in a place where he's safe and won't be disturbed but also really the whole little domestic bliss of Aziraphale coming back and being all "Crowley? There you are" and showing him what he got at the shops and such. It's the most normal married thing imaginable and feels like they really live together and Crowley loves every minute of it.

So Hell taking his place in Mayfair back leaves Crowley with two options because it's still too risky for him and Aziraphale to just full on live together entirely: he can get a new apartment or he can basically just keep living with Aziraphale for most of the day and then spend the mornings in The Bentley/out.

If he gets a new apartment, he'd have to actually go there sometimes. He'd have to be seen moving his stuff into it and he'd have to get a new bed and he'd have to spend nights there sometimes to prove he's living there. It couldn't be suspiciously close to Aziraphale's place, so now he's got to drive more in the early morning hours. He's been spending so much time with Aziraphale, the thought of sleeping alone and spending the evenings alone again, even for a few nights now and then, is depressing. It was miserable before and now he can't to back to it again and he doesn't think Aziraphale would want to, either. He also doesn't exactly know how to tell him he'd have to be away some nights again without hurting him. They've both been alone more often than not for most of their existences and Crowley can't do it anymore. There's also, though, that getting another apartment also doesn't do much to help keep Heaven & Hell from thinking he and Aziraphale are involved... but pretending he's living in his car just might.

The only being of Heaven or Hell still talking to either him or Aziraphale is Shax and Crowley has to keep meeting up with her to get information on what's going on there and try to get a sense of how much time he and Aziraphale might have before Round Two. If he tells Shax that he's living in his car, then it makes him look less close to Aziraphale. Everyone knows Aziraphale has a private residence upstairs in the bookshop and that, if he and Crowley were really close, he'd have offered for Crowley to stay with him if he lost his apartment... so what if Crowley can make Heaven & Hell think they aren't that close, they just teamed up to stop Armageddon? He's even homeless now and the angel won't give him a place to stay. He tells Shax to tell Hell's Finance Office to send his bills to his car and Shax actually bought it and said she tried. Shax has been reporting back to Hell that Crowley is living in his car, which is what Crowley wanted her to think was the case.

Let Hell think they've won over him and taken his place and left him living in his car on a side street, let Shax keep meeting him in the early morning hours in his car on that side street... so that none of them figure out that he's actually living in the bookshop with Aziraphale.

In the meantime, no new apartment means no more nights away from Aziraphale. No commute back to it after picking up The Bentley on the side street means more time he can be with Aziraphale before he has to slip away in the early morning. He can just keep going from the bookshop to his car a few streets away each morning like he has been and that's the funniest part of it to him. Hell thinks they left him homeless and abandoned him and, really, they just made it easier for him to hide from them the fact that he's living with the angel he loves. All he has to do is bullshit them and he's good at that.

Crowley talking about living in his car is basically this in attitude, on steroids:

His pre-S2 conversations with Shax were like... Fuck, Shax, the crick in my neck from *sleeping in my car*... if Hell's Finance Office wants to find me, they can send the bills *to my car*... Bastard angel owns half of Soho, probably why I can't find a place... tell Lord Beezlebub if they're looking for me, they can go fuck themselves but if they absolutely have to contact me, they can find me *in my car*...

...and three hours or so earlier from every one of those conversations, Crowley was actually curled up in bed with Aziraphale in the bookshop.

[mscherub]

The Extrovert and the Introvert(Kalim Al-Asim x Reader)

Gender neutral reader, referred to as Y/N or Prefect!

Warnings!:

Symptoms of panic attack(ex.: labored breathing, nausea)

Little bit of negative self talk

THE GLUTTON GRIM IS >:( (love him still, he baby)

Possible spelling mistakes, I didn’t proof read it when I transferred it 💀

Word count:

Approximately 2.8k

Kalim was the polar opposite from you it seemed, he was outgoing, friendly with everyone, and loved parties, a convivial type of person, but you liked him for that, finding it fascinating how he just got along with anyone and everyone, watching from the sidelines.

The moments you and him hung out alone were never boring, and he brought a boost of confidence to your being when talking to new people. But you only ever felt like that when around him.

Ironic, the introvert and the extrovert. But, it worked out. Kalim considered you a close friend, and you considered him that as well, but it ran deeper than that, didn’t it?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

You never were a big party goer at all, not here, and not back in your world. You preferred to stay at home and just watch shows while snacking and playing games on whatever device you deemed fit. Sometimes you missed those quiet moments, especially in certain times like these…

The music booms loud on the stereos, people dancing away to the beat of the music, even a conga line formed of random students paraded the middle of the dance floor. Jamil is stressed out himself as he stocks up the snack tables with newly made food items, running back and forth between the kitchen, and all while keeping an eye on Kalim(poor Jamil). Kalim invited you to everyone of his parties, but you elegantly declined by saying you had to study, or that you had some job to do that Crowley gave you. But, Ace being the stupid guy he is, asked at lunch if you were going to the party. In all truth, you honestly didn’t really want to come, but when Grim heard the word “food” fall from Ace’s mouth, he was all in, and gave you the cute puppy dog eyes(kitty cat eyes?) until you reluctantly said yes to attending.

“Oh! Prefect, I think you’ll like this! It’s a specialty of the Scalding Sands! It’s amazing, try!” He beams happily as he hands you another plate with food.

Luckily Grim munches up most things on your plate, you weren’t really hungry, in fact, you were already starting to get overstimulated from the loud drums of whatever song was playing.

A headache starts to form quickly as people shout. Kalim smiles wide at you before he goes off to interact with the next group of people.

What times was it now? How long have you been here? Only 15 minutes…time couldn’t go by any slower, could it?

“Grim? You done? I think we should head out, we probably have something to study for—“

“Henchhuman, look at all the food! Can’t just leave it!”he interrupts you.

“Grim—“

“Eat now, talk later!” He hums as he stuffs his cheeks full of what seemed to be baklava and various other items.

Your head pounded even more now, and you found it a bit harder to breathe, and also a nauseating feeling starting to build up. Grim will be fine, you just need to get some fresh air and then maybe things will get better.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Navigating through the crowd is difficult, people bump into you from your left and to your right, always knocking you into someone else, causing you to have to apologize time and time again. Your breathing begins to get a bit more labored and your vision a little blurry.

You don’t realize as you walk that you’ve somehow ended up in the middle of the room, people glancing at you with questioning looks. You swallow thickly and you feel your breathing begin to quicken even more.

You shouldn’t have come. You shouldn’t have come, look at them all staring at you, you need to get out—

A hand touches your shoulder gently, causing you to jump.

You turn your head…It’s Kalim.

“Prefect? You seem a little out of it, here, follow me, I know a quieter spot.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Kalim acts like an airhead most times, and truthfully, he is, but he wasn’t that stupid. He can tell when something seems wrong with the people he cares about, I mean he literally has over 30 younger siblings, him being the oldest of the bunch, so he has some experience in telling whether someone is doing fine or not. Of course he does lack most basic social cues, but he tries his best to understand.

He quietly leads you out to the hallways of Scarabia, the cold, night desert air blowing gently, shocking you back into reality. He keeps a hand on your shoulder as he leads you further and further away, the obnoxious belabor of the music fading into just a faint murmur.

“Prefect, are you ok? Do you need anything? I can go get it for you.” He says, his eyes unusually shaped with worry.

You clear your dry throat as you finally begin to calm down. How embarrassing, completely and utterly embarrassing. Having a panic attack at a party—

“Prefect? You with me still?” Kalim shakes your shoulder gently. You look into his eyes and take a breath in.

“I’m, ok. I guess.” You murmur out. Kalim sighs and he smiles again.

“Good! Hey, I’ll be back, I’ll go get you a water.” He hums as he quickly leaves.

You sigh and you rub your temples, leaning against the wall. Tears prick the corner of your eyes but you quickly wipe them away with your sleeves. Phew, finally away from the party.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Kalim comes back a few minutes later, holding a water bottle and…another plate of food.

“I didn’t know what you wanted.” He sighs as he looks at the stuff. He sits down on the ground, waiting for you to do the same, which you do. You look at him.

“Water, here.” He pushes a water bottle into your hands.

“Oh, do I need to open it for you? I usually have Jamil open mine—“

Was he serious?

“I got it, thank you, though.” You murmur out as you crack the bottle open and sip on it.

“What happened? Ah, I mean, if you wanna tell me.” He stammers. He looks concerned. You look into his eyes again and quickly shift your gaze over to look at a potted plant in a corner that is seemingly more interesting at the moment.

“I guess…I just had a panic attack? I’m not a huge fan of uh…parties.” You whisper out.

You look back over at him nervously, I mean, you just told the guy who loved parties you basically hated going to the plethora of ones he hosted and that you avoided them by fabricating up assignments, but he didn’t seem sad, or disappointed at all.

Kalims eyes softened and he scoots closer to you, hugging you.

“Sorry, prefect. I didn’t know that. How stupid of me! I don’t like seeing you sad, actually I love seeing you smile so, don’t feel bad! I don’t want any of my friends to be sad…especially not you.” He mumbles, the last part of his sentence more so of a whisper to himself. He pulls away and smiles again.

“Maybe I’ll host just a tiny party later on? Would that work?” He beams.

I don’t know if he understood the part of “you not being a huge fan of parties,” but a less crowded one you could probably deal with…I suppose there was really no way of changing his nature.

“Yea, that sounds good.” You sigh as you fidget with the water bottle in your hands. Kalim bounces slightly and smiles wider.

“Awesome! Hey, while Grim binges out, would you maybe wanna go for a carpet ride?” He whispers with a smirk on his face.

“Maybe it’ll help to clear your head a bit more!”

Your eyes go a little wider and you look at him. One stressful situation and now he’s trying to put you into another one? This guy…

“Do you trust me?” He murmurs as he takes one of your hands in his.

Do you trust him? Of course you do. He gives you a pout, his pleading sparkling eyes swaying you instantly.

“I…sure. Yes, I trust you, Kalim.” You stammer out. You take a breath and watch as he jumps up, pulling you up next. He grips your hand in his and drags you to the treasury where the carpet usually was, all while humming a tune happily

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Kalim gets on the carpet and holds out his hand to you. You take it and he helps hoist you up.

“All good?” He asks as he looks at you expectantly. You nod and you scoot more towards the middle of the carpet. Kalim sits up front closer to the edge, smiling wide.

He looks back at you, watching you as you hold onto whatever your hands can grip for dear life. “You can trust carpet. He’s good at this.” He giggles. And then—

You squeeze your eyes shut as the carpet descends into the starlit sky, going higher and higher, the wind picking up and ruffling your clothes and hair. “I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die,” is all you can think at the moment, and even opening your eyes just a sliver was a scary thought. But, you’re pulled from your thoughts quickly as you feel a pair of arms wrap around you, and you instinctively wrap your arms back around him.

“Don’t you dare close your eyes. Look! It’s pretty, believe me, perfect.” He laughs. You crack one eye open, then the other, and now? You can’t even blink.

The stars twinkle brightly, practically smiling down upon you two as the carpet glides seamlessly through the air. The moon’s celestial light gracing and bathing each of your features with a silvery glow. You slowly relax and loosen your grip from around him.

The desert below looks so small now compared to the large, jet black sky that sparkled.

“Woah…” is all you can manage to choke out.

“I know, right? Glad you trusted me, Y/N…” he smiles softly

“It’s like…a, a whole new world.” You whisper.

All of it was an ethereal sight, and, who knew how bucolic the sky could be up so close? You’d never take this for granted, that was for sure.

You turn your head back and smile widely at Kalim, the weight of what happened being lifted off your shoulders. His smile widens as well and he bounces up and down again.

“There! You smiled again! Good, good! Welcome back, prefect!” He exclaims, gesticulating just how happy he was with big gestures of his arms, which in turn, caused the carpet to move a bit, sending you to hold onto him again.

He laughs heartily and looks you in the eyes, his smile fading into a softer one.

“I’m sorry about earlier again. I know Grim dragged you there but, I never really thought you didn’t want to be there, I was just happy you were. Just me being stupid as usual, right?” He sighs, shaking his head.

“It’s not your fault. It’s mine, really, for not doing well in those settings—“

“Hey, don’t say that. It’s not your fault. It’s far from yours!” He scolds, though his voice lacks any bite to it.

“It’s just who you are. I’ll try and be better, I promise, be more considerate. I have been getting better! Jamil thinks so, but, it’s hard to tell with him.” He purses his lips, looking over at the moon.

“I’m like you, too, opposite, though. I’m nervous when I’m alone, instead.” He chuckles solemnly. He looks back at you.

“Ahhh…there I go again.” He grumbles. “Anyways, we should go back before Grim worries where you are.” He hums.

You don’t think Grim is the most bothered by any of this, I mean, the guy has got a whole table full of food, he’s definitely content. Tough, Jamil probably is the more worried considering how long Kalim has been out of his sight. Gotta feel bad for the guy.

Kalim shifts away from you and takes hold of the tassels on the carpet. He looks back at you again.

“Hold on!” He guffaws. You take that as a sign to scramble behind and wrap your arms around him.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The descent down was…scary…but you both were alive. Kalim walks happily with a pep in his step as you both make your way back to where the party was being held. You pause just outside the large double doors as Kalim goes to open them. He flashes you a small smile and heads in, leaving you alone.

A few minutes later an exasperated Jamil exists through the door, holding grim by the scruff.

“Take him and leave.” He sighs as he pushes Grim into your arms.

“And, if you leave somewhere with Kalim, for the love of the seven, please tell me first.” He huffs, face palming.

“Have a goodnight. Be safe.”He murmurs before going back to hold down the fort.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

As soon As you got back to Ramshackle, Grim was out like a light from having eaten too much. He curled up on the edge of the bed as usual, leaving you to get ready for bed yourself, silently slipping into your sleepwear.

You get into bed, the sweet lull of peaceful dreams pulling you to sleep.

Tap. Tap. Knock.

You flutter your eyes open and look over at your window anxiously, but it’s the furthest thing from anything scary. It’s Kalim. You get out of bed and flip up the locks on your window.

“What are you doing here?” You whisper. Kalim was seated on his carpet just outside your window.

“I wanted to check on you again. You’re better now, right?” He whispers back.

How sickeningly sweet of him.

“I’m doing better. Thank you. The carpet ride really helped to…calm me down.” Your eyes meet his. He places his hands on the windowsill and moves in closer.

“Good. Honestly, I don’t know why I came. I couldn’t go to sleep without knowing you were going to be ok just one last time. Weird isn’t it?” He sighs.

“Also, Jamil got mad at me.” He frowns. “If you got some backlash from him I’m sorry. Not intended!” He pouts. You chuckle and shake your head.

How cute.

“Jamil just told me to warn him next time. And, thanks for worrying about me…still. It’s sweet of you, but I’m ok now.” You smile. Your hand gently sitting atop his as an extra added bonus of reassurance. “You sure you came here just to check on me, though? You could have just messaged me, y’know?” You giggled.

He looks at you surprised for a moment but then chuckles, his cheeks dusted with a faint hint of pink as he glances away.

“Slipped my mind. You know me.” He chortles. He shakes his head and looks back at you.

“I’m glad you’re, ah, ok.” He sighs. “I guess goodnight then?” He purses his lips. “Goodnight, Kalim. And, no crowded parties for me.” You chuckle.

Kalim chuckles along with you and nods. There’s a comfortable silence between you two as you just gaze at each other.

Who knows what takes over, but you lean in and kiss his cheek gently. AHHHHH, OK, MAYBE YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE DONE THAT!! ABORT, ABORT!

You pull away, your cheeks redder than a tomato at this point.

“I- that…why did I do that? Kalim, I’m sorry that was—“ you stammer but then stop as you look back at Kalim who is as red as you. You feel the guilt start to build up.

“Now I know why.” He murmurs out, his eyes wide. You look at him confused, guilty, embarrassed, all of the above, expecting him to push you away but—

“It makes sense why my heart speeds up when around you now. I thought it was just because I finally found a good friend but…it runs deeper than that.” He whispers. His eyes soften as he looks at you.

“Look at me being stupid again! I would have planned a much nicer venue, or maybe have something cute prepared at least or just something to confess…” he pouts. He moves his hands and holds onto yours.

“I like you, perfect.” He states, proudly, too.

You’re baffled. Robbed of words. Lost. Was this happening? Hello, pinch me, if this is some sick messed up dream this is super unfair!

He squeezes your hands gently again, looking down at them intertwined, running his thumb over your knuckles. You clear your throat and hold his hands back.

“I like you, too.” You murmur out. Kalim looks back into your eyes and sighs. He giggles happily and moves your hand to his heart which is beating oh so rapidly.

“I like you. A lot. Too much. Ahhhhh, I’m happy.” He says all giddy. He laughs breathily and moves to hug you tight, burying his face in your neck.

“So…this means?” You murmur out as you hug him back. He simply nods. (Give him a few moments, it’s a lot to process.)

He pulled away, his eyes glossy. Was he seriously crying?

“I have to tell Jamil, this’ll be—“

“Ah…maybe not yet, Kalim.”

Idek what I was on when I wrote this…enjoy anyways, LOL. Anyhow…how many references did I make to Aladdin in this? Just a small trivia question if you feel like answering :D

Also we’re getting hit with a snowstorm so I have more time to write!!!

Master list

Please don’t steal or copy any of my work! You may, however, reblog if you’d want to!

Pictures belong to Disney Twisted Wonderland but are edited by me :)

[the-ineffable-dance]

A Companion to Owls is my favorite of the minisodes. Possibly my favorite story in the whole show. But more than it being just good fun and visually amazing, (plus, it gives us Bildad the Shuhite, I mean, come on..)

Job's story, really, is the beginning of "our side."

Before the Job story, Aziraphale and Crowley of course know each other, but I think it's still been a bit of feeling each other out. No one has really put themselves out where they could get into trouble. There's the chat on the walls of Eden, and then again at the Flood. In both of those, Crowley does a little pushing of Aziraphale's boundaries, but Aziraphale, regardless of his internal struggle, outwardly toes the party line... Heaven's plans, no matter how they might look, are in fact ineffable.

In Job, we see for the first time that they are beginning to really see each other. Aziraphale knows that Crowley doesn't want to kill off Job's goats or his children.

Though, of course, he's got to be a little smug about it.

And even when Crowley puts that to the test when he's setting the house on fire, Aziraphale remains confident in Crowley's innate goodness. And is again proven right when Crowley miracles them all into the cellar.

Crowley, for his part, knows that Aziraphale is starting to question the ineffable plan. God and Satan making bets, letting Job be tormented by demons, killing children... he sees the questions that Aziraphale is starting to have, and eases the path for him by being receptive to those questions.

Here we also have the start of Aziraphale's hedonism and love of human things. He's not quite ready to take the step of drinking alcohol, but he does accept Crowley's temptation to eating... and realizes that he's starving. It's his first bite in his entire existence, and he eats an entire ox! It's a small step from there to other things that we see him loving in the present... wine, music, books, clothes (I'm looking at you, 1793), all the things the other angels look down on him for, and Crowley probably introduced him to.

In 1941, they have the exchange, "You told me to trust you." "And you did." But I think that we have that here, too... for the very first time. When Sitis and Job are told that their children are dead, Aziraphale and Crowley put on quite the show with their cobbler/midwife and angel straight man performance. It's actually quite impressive... every time one of them leans on the other to keep up the charade, the other obliges...

It's important to remember just how dangerous this dance is for both of them. First of all, Crowley could not be in a worse place. Not only is there a host of angels here, Gabriel the Supreme Archangel is in the lead. To find a demon here, interfering in the ineffable plan, would certainly end in a smiting. His cleverness and the trust of Aziraphale are the only things that keep him one step ahead.

Secondly, Aziraphale himself is in great danger. Not only has he been collaborating with a demon, tempted into eating, and so on, but he is lying to Gabriel's face. We've seen him lie before. Most memorably to God when she asked where his sword went. But those were little white lies, with few ramifications. "These are his new children" is a direct contradiction to what the Plan is. He is for the first time, turning from the Heavenly Plan, and instead throwing in his lot with Crowley.

Which brings me to my final point...

Aziraphale is terrified of falling. But he was willing to do it to save the children. And that is something that means a lot to Crowley. When he realizes that Aziraphale thinks he's already fallen, he does tease him a little bit, but more importantly, he is soft and kind, talking him through this huge change in worldview.

The most touching moment is when Crowley admits that this path he is walking and Aziraphale now finds himself on is lonely. Crowley has been feeling it since the Garden... but now, it will be less lonely. Aziraphale doesn't have to face it alone, because Crowley will be there, too. Now, they have "us."

[ineffable-baker-street]

i have several things to say about the whole body swap situation:

1. crowley's icecream of choice is vanilla with a flake in it, and that might be my favourite thing ever, because it's such a stereotypical aziraphale thing to like

2. i really enjoyed watching it the second time, and watching how michael and david changed their mannerisms ever so slightly, so much so that it was hardly even noticeable the first time watching, and when I did notice the first time I immediately dismissed the thought

3. i love how when gabriel says "shut your stupid mouth and die already," we see just a flash of crowley's anger that someone would speak to aziraphale like that, but he quickly gets it under control. that was pure rage though, and very well done by michael

4. the flames shooting out of "aziraphale's" mouth. just very fun, and i like that crowley was very slightly more relaxed about how he portrayed aziraphale

5. david's performance of aziraphale being crowley is spot on. the subtleties are PERFECT and he did such an amazing job of it

6. the way they're sitting on the bench afterwards. such a good small detail, and extremely noticeable as soon as the change happens, but you don't even really register it at first

7. just the script in general. they gave "crowley" all the questions aziraphale would normally ask, again only a tiny bit noticeable, and most people would've dismissed it immediately in the first watch

anyway, overall, probably my favourite part of the show, because it's so ingenious

[aceofwhump]

(Go2 spoilers)

THE LAST EPISODE? opinions about the episode?

SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!!! Mildly incoherent keyboard smashing below

OH MY GOD!!!

I AM HEARTBROKEN!!! I was crying during the entire end scene!!!! Legitimately sobbing sitting on the edge of my, mouth hanging open in shock!

But it's like a good heartbroken? Okay so first of all I fucking love angst. I think that's pretty obvious here lol. So watching all the angst between the two of them in last few minutes was a delicious kind of heartbreaking! And I fully plan on making gifs especially of Aziraphale's angsty face. Cause god its beautiful.

And David Tennant and Michael Sheen are just so so amazing at their jobs and their acting during that scene was PHENOMENAL. They had me on the edge of my seat, crying like a heartbroken teenager. It takes a lot to get me to react like that to a show especially lately but David and Michael destroyed me.

And I personally think this is AMAZING writing/plotting. Of course this will on depend on Amazon giving us season 3 so everyone better watch the crap out of this season okay! Because season 2 focused a lot on Crowley and his realizations of feelings so I'm expecting season 3 will see Aziraphale let go of this picture of Heaven = Good and Hell = Bad thing and realize he loves Crowley and wants to be with him forever and the teo of them will talk and apologize and work things out and end up in the cottage in South Downs. That's the ending I'm sure we'll get. But we need to get there and there was bound to be angst on the way. This kind of angst feels so in character to me and feels right. Not all things are happy all the time and sometimes angst is good for plot development. This is GOOD ANGST! This will further the plot, create a viable route for character development that will inevitably give us our happy ending!

I know a lot of people are upset by it in like an angry why kind of way but I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT A LOT!

And a few random thoughts:

I never pictured Crowley being the first to make a move and I was so proud of him for putting himself out there and asking Aziraphale to stay with him and they can just be an us and then going further and showing his feelings by kissing him! It was beautiful and deep and scary and wonderful and I DIED! And his face and body language after Aziraphale did the thing was SO HEARTBREAKING! DAVID AND MICHAEL ARE SO GOOD AT THEIR JOBS!

And Aziraphale! Oh my god this angel is killing me! All he wants is to be with Crowley! He didn't give a shit about the Metatrons offer until he said Aziraphale could make Crowley an angel again and they could be together. Look at his smile in that scene! That made him so happy! He could be with Crowley and they could go home and be good angels again! In his head thats the perfect ending! They would be home together, doing good work and Crowley could make things again and ask his questions without fear of retaliation. Aziraphale remembers how happy Crowley was at the beginning, making his stars and galaxies, and believes Crowley wants that again. He also always believed in Crowley's goodness AND Aziraphale is still stuck in the belief of Heaven and angels being inherently good and the good guys while Hell and Demons are inherently evil and the bad guys. So he still believes that they should both be up in Heaven.

But Crowley knows the truth! Crowley sees that both sides are toxic and that for the two of them to be happy they need to be just the two of them like they have been these past few years. And they were happy! So he tries to get that through Aziraphale but Aziraphale isn't ready to hear that.

THEN THE KISS HAPPENS AND AZIRAPHALE ISN'T READY FOR IT AND HE ENDS UP BREAKING CROWLEYS HEART EVEN THOUGH AZIRAPHALE DOES LOVE HIM AND YOU CAN SEE HIS HEARTBROKEN CONFUSED AND IN LOVE FACE AFTER CROWLEY LEAVES AND AZIRAPHALE TOUCHES HIS OWN LIPS!!!

I AM FUCKING DYING NONNY!!! I'M DYING!!! IM LOSOMG MY MIND AND I KNOW THERE ARE OTHERS THINGS I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT. IT I CANNOT THINK STRAIGHT!!!

[sighed-the-snake]

I'm working on my fic and had fun writing this bit. It's just the shape of the scene and needs filling out, but here, have a ficlet.

“I got to help childhood sweethearts get married,” said Aziraphale tenderly. She watched the newlyweds dance with soft eyes. “I’m in my last hours of this assignment. After tonight, they’ll be married beyond contestation, and I’ll be on my way.”

Crowley turned to a young man approaching her with a hopeful smile and snapped, “No.”

The man frowned, offended, and turned away.

“Played the role of divine matchmaker, did you?” asked the demon with casual interest, as though nothing had happened. Aziraphale smiled privately but did not comment.

“Not quite. My job was to play interference so no one could stop the wedding. The lady was the more vulnerable of the two, so I’ve mostly been staying close to her.”

“Exactly how did you play interference, angel? Did you lock someone in a linen closet?”

“In fact, I did,” confided Aziraphale proudly.

They exchanged delighted smiles.

“Tell me everything,” hissed Crowley.

“Later,” said the angel. “I’m still working. Everything should go smoothly from here, but you never know when someone might try to be clever. Like poisoning the couple’s wine so they’re too sick to consummate their marriage, for example.”

“They didn’t.”

“They did. Everything is fine now, but I wish I knew who it was.”

“Mm.” Crowley’s eyes scanned the crowd, and using her lips, she pointed to a young woman. “I’d place my bets on that one. She’s broadcasting resentment and envy so loudly it’s leaving a funny taste in my mouth.”

Aziraphale blinked, glanced at the demon’s red mouth, then quickly glanced away again. “Ah. That sounds unpleasant.”

“It’s like licking a wet rat.”

“How do—? No, wait, I don’t want to know.”

Crowley grinned and rested her eyes upon the crowd once more. “At what part of the evening does your assignment end? Are you going to lurk behind a curtain while they—”

“Hah,” interrupted Aziraphale wildly. “You know, I don’t think it’s appropriate to discuss the details of official business with a demon. You’re here to cause trouble, aren’t you? If you ask any more questions, I’m quite afraid I’ll have to end this conversation.”

Crowley stared in amazement. “You are!” She pressed a hand to her chest. “I never would have pegged you as one for voyeurism, angel.”

“I – no – it’s – oh, do shut up,” said Aziraphale, embarrassed. “I just have to make sure all the boxes are checked off on their human cultural practices so the marriage can’t be contested, and I have one final blessing to do. That’s all it is, checking off a box, and then I can leave.”

“If he’s a good husband he’ll check her box off first.”

“Crowley!” said Aziraphale, aghast.

The demon chuckled wickedly and sipped her wine. Crowley did not look at Aziraphale as the angel went through the struggle of controlling her breath and smoothing the redness from her cheeks. They watched the wedding party as the people danced, strolled, sipped, and practiced their social games.

[prosperousduckscommuteviawaffle]

Crowley being so amazed Job gets to ask god questions hurts. Not just because he was cast out for asking questions but the implication here that Crowley never even asked those questions directly to god.

Metatron was probably his suggestion box.

Metatron was probably integral to Crowley’s fall.

Metatron who made a point of addressing Crowley as demon and asking if he knew who they were.

And then proceeded to take away what he loves most.

[theravenmuse]

S1E1 meta post 2 - the second half of the opening scene

Aziraphale is the reason for (at least some of) Crowley’s pesky questions

Crowley is gushing about his nebula, explaining what it does and how amazing it will be. Creating stars. (Just like he does.) 

Possibly mirroring the drunk scene from S1E1, Crowley explains, with elaborate arm movements: “Boom! Stars everywhere!”

Aziraphale starts to look uncomfortable here and breaks the news that it’s all going to end in 6000 years and Crowley isn’t going to get the millions it needs to do its work. Here, Crowley’s joy, which has been so vibrant, falls to not only disappointment, but also to confusion and doubt. “But that’s nothing!” he says. The pain in his voice is heartbreaking. “Oooh. What's the point in creating an infinite universe with trillions of star systems if you’re only gonna let it run for a few thousand years? The engine won’t have properly warmed up by then.”

Aziraphale, relieved to have an answer but also, I think, doubting that it’s the right one, explains about Earth and the people and how all of creation is for them. Crowley remains unconvinced. “But that’s idiocy! It’s the universe, it’s not just some fancy wallpaper! Millions of galaxies, trillions of stars, oodles of… everything! It’s not just put here to twinkle!”

Crowley also makes another very good point that I think could use a meta post of its own, but that’s for later after quite a bit of theorizing. “Most of it won’t even be visible from Earth. Why don’t you put Earth in the middle of the universe so the view’s better?” For this post, I’ll just say that he’s absolutely right, and I suspect that the reason for that is because it isn’t actually all meant to end in 6000 years and it isn’t just for the people of Earth.

Now Aziraphale is getting truly uncomfortable. “It’s not our job to advise The Almighty on the details of creation.” He means it as a gentle dissuasion. Crowley is not dissuaded. He fires back with, “Well then whose job is it? I mean, someone has to say, “Look boss, this is a really, really terrible idea.””

Now Aziraphale is getting even more upset. He calls Crowley’s suggestion inappropriate. Crowley is still not dissuaded and suggests further that The Almighty should consider a suggestion box. Aziraphale is very, very upset. His upset, I think, is not actually that Crowley would suggest these things, but that he (Aziraphale) cannot logically find fault with them, putting himself at odds with what he’s been told is right and his own rationalizations. In his very, very upset voice, Aziraphale continues: “I don’t believe The Almighty has actually created a suggestion box. And furthermore, I don’t think it’s our place to start suggesting that there should be a suggestion box.”

Here, Crowley takes it the whole mile. “Well, y’know, if I was the one running it all, I’d like it if someone asked questions,” he says. He says a few other things, but I don’t think Aziraphale is listening past this. He’s even looking over both shoulders as if to check that nobody else is around to hear this. In a desperate bid to hold on to his sanity, Aziraphale points out the nebula again. He doesn’t actually care about the nebula. Well, he does, but not in this moment. Luckily, it works. Crowley goes back to smiling, though it isn’t the broad, unrestrained joyful smile from before and doesn’t ask anymore of those difficult questions.

Still shaken, but on somewhat firmer ground now that Crowley’s onslaught of suggestions has stopped, Aziraphale adds: “Um, but look, word to the wise, I’d hate to see you getting into any trouble.” Crowley tells Aziraphale not to worry. “How much trouble can I get into just for asking a few questions?” Oh poor innocent angel.

Then there’s the meteor shower. Crowley covers Aziraphale with his wing, mirroring the scene in Eden from season 1. Note that Crowley is still on the left throughout this scene despite the fact that he’s not a demon yet.

[nimbusalba]

Hiya! For the Good Omens Ask Game - questions 2, 10, 15 and 22!

Hiya! How are you, honey? I’m so glad you asked! Sit down and take a cold drink, iced tea? Juice? Smoothie? Let’s answer those questions, shall we?

2. What was it that drew you to Good Omens, and what was it that sucked you into the fandom?

What drew me to the book about 20 years ago was that it was written by Terry Pratchett. I didn't know Neil Gaiman yet. I loved the book and that drew me to the show. Last year I remembered they had made the series. I watched the first season and loved it even more than the book, because, come on, that series is a work of art. The story is amazing but what Michael Sheen and David Tennant have done with Aziraphale and Crowley is just beyond words. I learned there was a second season. And that sealed my future. Somewhere between s2e2 and s2e3 I was so hooked I couldn't stop watching. But I think what sucked me into the fandom’s downwards spiral and the never ending brainrot was the final fifteen. That scene changed my brain chemistry for good and after that moment I haven't been able to think of anything other than these two idiots and the good omens universe.

10. What traits do you share with Crowley?

Just like Crowley I’m a nervous wreck trying to hide it from the rest of the world, so anxiety is one of our shared traits. Also curiosity, critical thinking, dislike of hierarchy and questioning orders and authority. You’ll be happy to know I don’t kill kids either, so that’s another trait Crowley and I share. I also love Aziraphale, but I reeeeally love them both, so idk if it counts as a shared trait. Unfortunately I’m not an optimist deep down.

15. If you could be besties with anyone from the Good Omens universe, who would it be?

That’s a difficult one. I’d give an arm to be besties with Aziraphale or Crowley, just like anyone would do. Aziraphale is so tender and caring and, deep down, such a bitchy bastard. On the other hand, Crowley is a captivating demon and if I were besties with him I’d probably get to meet Hozier, which would also be amazing.

But other than the ineffables, I’d love to be besties with Tracy, as I find she is a fascinating, strong woman and she seems to be so fun. I'm sure there wouldn't be any dull moments with her.

22. Bildad The Shuhite: hot or not?

Short answer: hot! I find Crowley/Crawley hot as hell in any circumstance whatsoever.

Long answer: Well, it depends on the POV. In the scenes at Job's house (at the patio, the cellar), which I take as Aziraphale's POV, Bildad is hot, hot, hot! With that long, curly hair he's really Bildaddy, you know what I mean.

In the rest of the scenes (which I take as Crowley's POV) with the shorter, frizzy hair he's hot but in a funny way.

[theonevoice]

Rumination n. 2 - About Fallen Angel

One aspect of Good Omens that I don’t see as much praised as the amazing writing of Neil Gaiman and the unbelievable performances of Michael Sheen and David Tennant, but I find crucial to the gut-wrenching beauty of this second season in particular, is the wonderful soundtrack by David Arnold.

The music of this show is just brilliant, to a point where it feels almost arrogant for me to point it out, like it would sound weird if someone came out of the blue saying “You know, that Beethoven guy is actually rather nice”. So I will just pick one single track that, to me, summarizes how much the soundtrack helps carry the weight of the story, packing layers over layers on each scene and adding to the writing and the acting an extra expressive space that can be filled with even more facets of the main themes.

I’m thinking in particular of the scene at the end of ep. 2, with the pivotal dialogue that, for the first time, really cement the alliance between Crowley and Aziraphale as two individuals who are not entirely conforming to the expectations of their respective sides. By the time this dialogue rolls in, something massive has just happened: each of them has been caught red-handed by the other, doing and feeling things that negate their respective “company policies”. Crowley has been found out not wanting to destroy Job’s goats, let alone kill his children, and Aziraphale has been found out unable to endorse the dire implications of the Bet. Lucky them, this all happened between the two of them, nobody else is involved or informed, and this reciprocity allows them to pause for a moment and start reflecting on their situation. We know, of course, that this moment was waiting to happen since the conversation on the wall of Eden, when Aziraphale is visibly touched by the slightest sliver of doubt (his expression tells us that what Crowley is saying about God putting the Tree in such a prominent spot, as if to induce temptation on purpose, does make a point, despite him not wanting to speculate, possibly because he remembers all too well how dangerous it is to ask questions in Heaven), and since their meeting before the flood, when Crowley realizes that he doesn’t like the perspective of having innocent people killed, which is not a strictly demon-like thing to feel (and he knows it because his comment about the indiscriminate extermination of everyone via the flood is “this is more the kind of thing that you would expect my lot to do”, which, transitive property applied, means that he is upset about at least some of the things that Hell throws at the earth). But the Job encounter is the first time that all of this has actually been said (more or less) out loud by both of them.

So what about the music?

The track playing with the final dialogue is titled Fallen Angel, and I find that there is something heartbreaking in it. Yes, of course, it is a quote from Aziraphale’s line, when he desperately refers to himself as “a fallen angel”, but “fallen angel” is also what Crowley is, despite what he himself would like to think.

We talk a lot about how much Aziraphale is the one in constant denial – denial of Heaven’s dark sides, denial of his own sometimes shaky moral stance (let’s not forget that, between the Arthurian period and the meeting at the Globe, he has agreed to go around tempting people on behalf of Crowley, which means quite literally doing Hell’s work), most of all denial of his own feelings – and this is certainly true. But I feel that we should also recognize how much Crowley is in denial in his own way, specifically denial of the traces that his original angelic nature has left behind. Or rather, of those parts of angelic nature that he held on to even after being cast to Hell. Now, as much as I love the interpretation of their last exchange in ep. 6 as Aziraphale offering to “change Heaven for him” rather than asking him to change for Heaven, I still think that Aziraphale has been forcing on Crowley a distorted still-an-angel portrait because in doing so he is blocking out at least some of his internal struggle (and this “weakness”, in my opinion, makes his character even more vivid and lifelike). But I also think that Crowley’s angry reactions to having his chosen identity denied by the only person in the universe that is dear to him are tinted by the trauma of the Fall.

And the music in that scene, I believe, is telling us just that. Of all the tracks in season 2, I find Fallen Angel to be the most melancholy one together with The End?, and possibly even sadder: because The End? starts playing when both us viewers and the protagonists are in a literal, I would say almost medical state of shock, unable to master the emotional resources needed to process what just happened. Fallen Angel on the contrary is a desperately calm moment of reflection on what their situation in the universe is, on how their respective cages are hurting them, and how painfully hard it is to summon the courage to escape them, to even think of escaping them. It seems to me that even the set choice confirms this mood: after an entire episode spent almost exclusively in closed, sometimes claustrophobic spaces, they are finally “outside”, on the top of a cliff (like when they briefly met at the beginning of the episode, but now the dry canyon is a beautiful gulf), watching a calm blue sea under a calm blue sky: everything is wide open, vast, unobstructed, with no living thing around as if they are alone in the universe, their thoughts and fears can flow freely and unrestricted. And in this moment of honesty, when they for the first time open up to each other, we have Fallen Angel, which is not just sad, is also nostalgic. But how and why can it be nostalgic? If the title only refers to Aziraphale, nostalgia makes no sense, because his feelings in those moments are feelings of desperation and angst. But if the title refers to both of them, then it does make sense, because nostalgia is the pain of something that has been lost, and while Aziraphale has not lost anything yet, sitting next to him there is someone who has lost something that cannot entirely be forgotten. Surely, one could say that by now Aziraphale has lost his original “innocence”, but I would argue that, on the wall of Eden, having just given away the flaming sword, he was already letting that sliver of doubt creep in, and he was definitely not comfortable with discussing the flood. Furthermore, telling his first lie counts as a loss (of innocence and peace of mind) no more than it counts as a gain (of awareness, freedom, and self-actualization). On the other side, Crowley was denied the chance to work his situation out in such a safe space. He just lost his original status over asking questions.

If Aziraphale is in denial of the traits of his personality that make him not entirely angelic, Crowley is equally – if not more – in denial of the traits of his personality that still link him to an ideal of good that is, or at least should be angelical. And it is a quite visible denial. He is annoyed by the smallest allusion to his good qualities, but as soon as he lets his guard down he goes back to remembering that he “didn’t mean to fall”, just “hung around the wrong people”, that he “didn’t really fall”, just “sauntered vaguely downwards”. That’s why Fallen Angel can be nostalgic. It’s not just about Aziraphale contemplating for a moment that he could be (or deserve to become) a fallen angel, but it’s also about the actual fallen angel sitting next to him, who, as much as he wants to paint himself as tranquil and satisfied with his situation, is still aching from the absolute pain and terror that he felt when he was cast out of Heaven. He used to be, after all, the angel that we see before the Beginning: he was so sure that just asking questions could not get him into trouble, he had no intention of rebelling or leaving. This – obviously – does not mean that Crowley is still an angel or wants by any means to go back to being an angel: he could never go back to that, exactly because he has experienced too much grief to be ever able to fit in the narrow mould of an angel again, to be able to just bask in the joyous light of God’s will in the unshaken certainty that it is entirely Good and Just and Forgiving. He has first-hand experienced that it can be cruel and unjust and unforgiving. He has forged and conquered an identity of his own, but it is an identity born out of the pain of not having a place to belong. He had to carve out a new path for himself, he didn’t mean to, he barely realized that it was about to fall (“didn’t have anything on the rest of the afternoon… next thing I was doing a million light year freestyle dive into a pull of boiling sulfur”).

So let’s look at what is happening from Crowley’s point of view. There you have an angel that has just violated the Heavenly code of conduct, and he is so pure of heart that he is just going to turn himself in to a blind and vindictive authority. If he let him go ahead, there is a chance that this could give him a fellow “demon who goes along with Hell as far as he can”, but at what cost? If Aziraphale’s conflict is a conflict between living by his own independent judgment (which includes choosing Crowley over obedience to Heaven) and staying true to the side “of good, of truth, of light”, Crowley’s conflict is a conflict between the need to escape solitude by pulling Aziraphale to his side and saving Aziraphale from the trauma that the Fall gave him and that being fallen still gives him.

A couple of millennia later he will joke about how being damned “is not so bad when you get used to it”, but Fallen Angel playing under this dialogue in ep. 2 tells us that he would never put Aziraphale through what being damned really means. He is a demon who is actually saving an angel from the risk of becoming a demon himself, because he knows how deeply and irreparably that can wound your soul, to the point that you would rather lie than admit it. “I’m a demon, I lied”: I know what it means to be in this place, don’t drag yourself here, it’s a realm of exile and loneliness, let’s agree that an angel can still be an angel even if he steps out of line from time to time, let’s create a margin of maneuver that did not exist when all this happened to me. Now it’s too late for me, but not for you.

So, to wrap up, thank you David Arnold for your invaluable work.

[narrynukezankielover]

Finally finished season 2 (I was putting it off because I really didn’t want to cry since I knew what happened). I LOVED l the season. It’s so romantic with all the touches and looks. It’s amazing. I tried to get my thoughts together so I’m sorry if it’s hard to understand.

Ep 4 is my favourite. It’s what I call the trust ep. It’s easy to trust one another when you both have powers but to literally put your life into another persons hand when neither of you have powers and the person shooting the gun has never shot a gun before takes a LOT of trust and considering it happens on the same day that Aziraphale realizes he loves Crowley I’d say it takes a lot of trust and love. I think the amount of love and trust between them is going to come back big in season 3 (plus Crowley said the miracle that him and Aziraphale did on Gabriel worked a bit too well yet it was just a small miracle. I think they will realize how powerful they are together and that is what will stop the big war. I think they are so powerful because of that love, trust and maybe demon power with angel power.

As for ep 6 it made me think more than any other ep. It also left me with some questions. The Metratron (I don’t know how to spell it) said “one prince falling makes a good news story” so is Crowley the only higher up angel that’s ever went to hell? What happened in the first world war that made Aziraphale use his halo? When Crowley met Furfur and the angel in the wheelchair (I can’t spell her name so I’m not going to try) he said he didn’t know who they were. Whether he’s lying or not it doesn’t make sense that he didn’t pretend to not know the Metratron when he asked him if he knew who he was and when he talked about the last time he seen him Aziraphale knew who he was right away. We also know that they do wipe angels memories if they are being punished. I wonder if when Crowley went to ask god his questions Aziraphale went with him to try and convince him not to ask the questions but he didn’t get to ask her the questions he met the Metratron instead (Crowley did seem a bit jealous that Job got to ask god questions. Plus the Metratron did say something to Aziraphale about Crowley always asking questions) then he was the one that sent Crowley to hell and tried to wipe his memories but maybe Aziraphale stopped it before he lost all his memories because he didn’t want Crowley to forget him. It would explain why he remembers some people but not all people. Maybe I’m over thinking that part.

The last 15 minutes made me bawl even though I knew what was comeing and I’ve seen parts of it online I still bawled. You can tell after the kiss Aziraphale was struggling with his decision (I’m also thinking that kiss was a protection). He wanted to stay with Crowley but he also wants to go to heaven to change things the way him and Crowley think heaven should be ran. Even outside before he gets in the elevator he’s still trying to decide and by the looks of it he was going to go with Crowley until the Metratron said something about the second comeing. All of a sudden Aziraphale knew if he went with Crowley now the universe was screwed. He knew he had to stop all of that from happening. Crowley usually protects him now he had to protect Crowley. When he’s in the elevator you can see him comeing up with a plan. I don’t like some of the hate Aziraphale gets for his decision to go to heaven but if you think about it he has to go to save everything and everyone including Crowley.

[phantasmicfish]

Okay so I want to get all my good omens s2 thoughts out there in one big swoop and try to sound coherent… and ofc I’ll later post exclusively what I loved because there is A Lot to love about this show!

I largely loved the first four episodes. I thought they were amazing, there was fantastic chemistry and humor between Aziraphale and Crowley. The back in time sequences were brilliant and slightly darker than they were in season 1! I felt they portrayed Heaven in a more critical light than we’ve seen before… ex: Heaven condoning the murder of children, messing Job’s life over a silly bet, kicking Crowley out for asking several questions.

I think the back in time sequences really showed Aziraphale’s struggle with his desire to follow Heaven/God because they're the Good Guys verses what Heaven/God is actually telling him to do being straight up bonkers. We see the first time he lies to other angels to save Job’s children, but this deed ends up in direct violation of God’s orders, so there’s this internal moral conflict here…

It was amazing to see angels and demons try to understand humanity and fail, versus Aziraphale and Crowley who are well-versed in humanity and their traditions and have the upper hand in this regard.

I love love LOVE Jim. I mean, Gabriel. I mean, James! The dynamic between him, Crowley, and Aziraphale was amazing! You have this horrible, completely awful boss who’s narcissistic and self-centered and completely detached from any form of human emotion… and you wipe his slate clean and stick him with two characters who think he’s a mega level asshole and watch their interactions unfold. I think Aziraphale promising to protect Gabriel and then upholding that promise despite Gabriel being a douche is so sweet, so in character… and Crowley going along with it even though he hates Gabriel with all his heart. And the way Crowley struggles to reconcile and accept this version of Gabriel with the one he’s seen in the past was very interesting to watch. Gabriel learning the alphabet, dusting the bookshop because he wants to be helpful, Gabriel jumping out the window because Crowley tells him this is how he can help Aziraphale really sold it for me— now, without his memory, Gabriel is kind and nice and just wholesomely curious. I think I would have liked to see more Gabriel-as-Jim scenes before he got his memory back, which brings me to what I don’t like about the show, namely, the last episode.

(HRHSHSHSBSZHSH)

So, the ultimate episode has the big resolution— it’s revealed Gabriel decided against a second Armageddon after his blossoming romance with Beelzebub, then he gets his memory back and the two of them go off together to live a life of romance and love and all that on Proxima Centauri, presumably.

And.

Just.

It’s too neat. It’s too tidy. Crowley and Aziraphale had all of creation to alleviate their prejudices and fall in love *cough they just don’t know it yet cough*. It’s not believable to me that Gabriel and Beelzebub would fall in love in such a short period of time based on such minimal interactions, I feel like love (a very human thing) is something pre-Jim Gabriel would look down on altogether. I wish we had more of Jim. I would, frankly, be fine without seeing the return of Gabriel altogether… or at least some scenes that show Gabriel as being grateful to Aziraphale and Crowley for hiding him out and risking destruction just for him…

I don’t know. I think that end was wrapped up too neatly and too tightly. I’d be happy if Gabriel never got his memory back this season, and we see the continuation of Jim in season 3. Why build a character up only to have him disappear just when we start to like him?

I didn’t care for Nina and Maggie. I thought they were superfluous in every sense of the word. I feel like their characters had a lot of potential in the beginning and then the plot just sort of ended up… not doing anything with their characters? Nina is in a maybe emotionally toxic relationship with Lindsay, but then that ends and we don’t even get to meet Lindsay. Maggie’s character has no development except for her love of Nina and her owning a record shop. And the two of them giving advice to Crowley at the end to just talk to Aziraphale just didn’t do it for me.

I was crushed when Aziraphale was asked to rejoin heaven and did so immediately and with open arms— it’s like that scene at the bandstand all over again, when Aziraphale said, there is no our side. He still believes in and wants to follow Heaven, whereas Crowley made his peace with being on his own side (not Heaven or Hell’s) many years ago.

So, essentially: I loved the show, but I’m not satisfied with the conclusion to Gabriel’s story or Maggie/Nina’s involvement, which sorta soured it for me. I do love the show! Especially every back in time featurette with Crowley and Aziraphale, any and all Crowley and Aziraphale interactions in the present today together and with Gabriel, the major ship vibes this season was pumping out! It was funny and lovely and aside from the imo lackluster Gabriel resolution, all around great!