#it’s disturbing and really annoying
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My life rn can be described perfectly by the phrase “I bit off more than I can chew”.
#except I keep taking more bites bc that’s just the stubborn person I am#well actually no#some say stubborn I say determined☺️#random post#late night post#everyone talking about the winter arc shit but my winter arc is trying to get 8 hours of sleep at least twice a week#my friends ask me how I function with so little sleep and I literally don’t know what to say bc I run on pure anxiety#like it actually keeps me going#natural pre-installed caffeine#in my body#also if you promote the winter arc thing but it’s just ed glamorization you immediately deserve to be absolutely attacked by the people who-#come across it#bc let’s not#they know what they’re doing#especially when they say: this will be you if you don’t start now#and then what they mean to start with is eating frozen grapes only or is just so obviously the glamorization of ed#idk why I had to mention that#as someone who has recently started eating breakfast after being terrified of the thought of going to school without an empty stomach#and I congratulate myself for this#it’s disturbing and really annoying#mention of ed#tw mention of ed#that’s not even what the post was about😭#bit off more than I can chew#whoever came up with that phrase needs to stand up bc they devoured
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i saw your caretaking triangle post and now i'm having Thoughts about mind and whole regressing together but mind still looking after whole
Dude I was just thinking that... or well. similar. I think Mind bullies Whole a lot when he's regressed [biting / wrestling / generally. being a bit of a nuisance] but also is super possessive / protective.
#Clichéd. depraved. disturbing. and contrived; THIS POST IS OOC TO ME.#I think he's like this with soul too. like.. regressed or not regressed. but when soul's caretaking him its more possesive#not protective. gets really annoyed if soul is giving heart more [read: any] attention instead of mind HAHA#cccc#cj#chonny jash#chonnys charming chaos compendium#cj mind#cccc mind#cj whole#cccc whole#cj soul#cccc soul#jbird's art#jbird's asks#anon
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Zero Day (2002)
#movies film cinema#zero day#ben coccio#I actually talked to the director on Facebook super nice guy and he told#me a lot about the filmmaking process and even helped me with tips on directing non-actors and new actors#I remember him telling me to always be supportive and tell your new actors they're doing a good job even if they aren't in the first take#cause you can instill confidence and still reshape and change their choices and mistakes later#Sometimes I'd message him for advice when I was running into problems on some of my early projects#he told me once ''did ya choose to collaborate with this actor cause you were lonely or you guys had passion and chemistry''#“collaborating is like a relationship” and he was so right#there's nothing worse than working with people you disdain cause there's no communication and no trust.#he told me how he wrote the first couple of drafts of Place Beyond the Pines but his take on the 3rd act wasn't clicking for the director#so he took the script and went and had another writer rewrite the 3rd act but he liked the process cause he learned a lot and still got pai#but I'd still like to see Ben Coccio's take on Place Beyond The Pines he says the 1st and 2nd act are mostly unchanged#Ryan Gosling's scenes are still mostly the same he said but he couldn't tell me too much cause of the NDA he signed#The bloopers of Zero Day are hilarious his tip he gave me about being supportive#“This is actually great but can we-” and Cal interrupts him “He says that no matter what if you're doing good or bad!” and everyone lols#I hope I can make it and ask him to collab with me on a script#He's such a nice dude compared to the harrowing film he made.#I wish there was BTS but he had only one tape to film on and this was made when digital camcorders were infants#I think he had only one 2 hour tape that's how low budget#The bloopers is just Cal or Andre secretly filming and Ben getting annoyed “Is it recording?” and Cal going “Nah..."#Cal is such a funny guy IRL I wanna see him act more cause he's so good. He was so great at playing a sadistic psychopath in this.#the final shooting is so harrowing and disturbing#I told Ben he srsly gut punched me/disturbed me and this is what made him really open up.
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Stop flirting....
#btw i have zero context for *when* that pic is from in the press con#but this is the only time they talk to/about each other in the transcript#so it is my headcanon that they are the same moment 🤭🤭#but god yet another exchange i would kill someone to get the video of#it just comes off in the transcript as so old married couple bickering??????#'oh *now* youre paying attention. was the light bothering you? was it really that bad for you'#'yes it was in fact disturbing me >:('#'youre being such a baby 🙄 the light in here is just as bright“#'alright sure mr. privileged man whos in the best car. of course you wouldn't understnd my struggles 😒'#'well maybe you shoul've just backed off and let me drive 🥺 i was already beating you whats the point'#'ummm actually no you werent'#mark: i am going to shoot myself#but its sooooooo funny seb being like aww dw 🥺🥺 i was trying to build a gap 🥺🥺 to shield your sensitive eyes 🥺#CAN WE PLEASE TALK THOUGH ABOUT SEB PATTING HIS CAP !!!!!!! SOOOOOO CUTE#no matter the actual context of the pic hes still 100% being an annoying brat to nando. I just know it#race weekend over. back to the content people TRULY care about: vettonso.(😭)#f1#formula 1#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#vettonso#2013 italian gp
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Internet mutual thrice removed: did you hear about the newest person with bizarre/disgusting/repulsive beliefs & behaviors that we just found in a weird corner of the internet and are dragging around publically where no one has heard of them and no one wants to see that shit? You have to have an opinion on this btw.
People in real life: did you hear it's going to be in the 50s next week?
#seal.txt#im a little annoyed every time some disturbed micro celebrity becomes a topic of conversation. sorry#i just feel like its kind of a waste of time#it also is annoying because on one hand people i respect and care about feel like they need to comment on it#but on the other you have people who have heard some bizarre third hand version of the story and fixated on the weirdest irrelevant detail#its a constant war of seeing awful people online every few months and everyone on my dash is like:#'holy cow i cant believe everyone ever has always been so obsessed with [person i have literally never heard of in my life]'#and the person in question like. kicks puppies and attacks children/elders in the streets#but somehow the issue always turns into some stupid unrelated bs when it hits the tumblr battlefields#anyway. thats all I have to say on the matter.#nuance is important and sometimes the nuance is that i think this happening every few months isnt really helping anyone#we should all block constantly also. i think lots of people on the internet are scumbags.#and i think their scumbag-ness should be the first issue brought up when their behavior is the topic of conversation.#it shouldn't be like 'this person ships voltron. oh and also they think all kittens should be placed in cannons so i guess I'll mention it'
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people shitting all over a movie bc it doesn't live up to the "scariest movie you'll ever see" hype is SOOOO stupid. like hello ever horror movie EVER uses that line as part of their marketing. you absolutely cannot put THAT much stake into that. be so serious.
#you can say you dont like a movie but do fucking not jump straight to the overhyped bullshit#come the fuck on#also there are different kinds of scary movies#like theres your classic jumpscare kind of scary and then theres your deeply unsettling kind of scary#and i think a LOOOOOT of people assume 'scariest movie of all time' means the jumpscare kind#when in fact that disturbing under your skin kind of creepy can be scarier!! (and is in fact the specific type of scary meant in this case!)#n e ways.#sorry im just really annoyed at just how many people ive seen taking biiig steamy dumps all over A Recent Movie for this exact reason#bc its bullshit#just bc something wasnt what you expected it to be doesnt mean it was overhyped#just bc it didnt scare you in the way you thought it was supposed to does not mean it is overhyped!#mack rambles
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reminds me of the insufferable hosts of that podcast who said 'torture should NEVER be shown onscreen' well have they considered sometimes something really awful needs to be depicted in order for a plotline to work. go read tgcf!!!
#also sometimes it's fun to see. I enjoyed the wen chao torture scenes. I mean they were horrifying but they were imaginative and exciting#it doesn't mean torture is being romanticized or downplayed#the horror is the POINT. not all torture scenes are in the same cultural and social contexts#and they were f#reveiwing a fantasy book they should KNOW that#frok the same minds that gave us 'the number one way to dehumanize women is to put them on a pedestal' bitch. did you forget racism exists#annoying as fuck liberals I hated them sooo much#there are some things I think shouldn't be shown or should be shown REALLY CAREFULLY#but I do not agree w complete censorship of something like torture#sometimes being disturbed and upset is the point...#cor.txt
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#the secret to making friends is to let yourself annoy them#this is a joke but im also being completely serious#all my life I've been too apprehensive to make the first move because im always afraid of being bothersome#but looking back at the friendships through the past 4years at uni... im so lucky that a lot of people didn't worry about bothering me#and decided to come up and initiate conversation anyway#and also. whenever anyone has 'bothered me' by asking about me or wanting to know more... I have only felt loved and special...#so i guess what im trying to say is that#cringe culture is dead and theres nothing cool about prioritizing how you appear over the potential of a real bond#and I was born to be persistent and curious#so yeah. now that my graduate program will start in a couple months and there are opportunities to get acquainted with my classmates#I reach out to people with no attempt to hide my enthusiasm in getting to know them.#I double/triple text a lot and annoy them (affectionate) like i do my bffs and its incredible how 9/10 reciprocate that energy so quick#and despite the cultural differences and minor mistranslations/miscommunications we still manage to find common interests to discuss about#and it's like '!!!!!!! we're besties now'#yeah sure sometimes people might get a bit uncomfy and by the second message if i feel like I'm disturbing them I back off#but i won't know that until i reach out in the first place. so all in all this has worked really well for me and i love itttt#megumi in the tags
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Actually concerning lately how many hostile comments I have seen about queer women in kpop circles on here and twitter that are kind of framed through the guise of statements you can't really argue with like 'idols are real people' and 'idols deserve privacy' but with a tone that just shows how much people hate queer women more than they care about idols being real people and their privacy. Like I will see people say things about female idols like 'Women attractor!!' And then when a queer woman actually says something about being attracted to them they'll log on like woah now idols are real people you shouldn't sexualize what if she sees that and gets uncomfortable by the possibility of a woman being attracted to her :( Or female idols will be on stage kissing each other on the mouth and if a queer woman says anything along the lines of how they're just like us people will be like woah now!! Don't speculate :( Idols are real people too :( And with the Karina dating rumor especially I don't even know anything about Karina but my Twitter feed this morning was full of recommended tweets with concerning amounts of likes (one had upwards of 100k) that were basically phrased like 'You disgusting women likers are delusional for thinking she ever would have dated you!! What predatory freaks some people like men and are just straight and you freaks are going to have to accept that'
#and some tweet too that i don't even know what sparked was someone tweeting that yunjin was straight and to get over it#and there were hundreds of replies like yeah most girls like dick get over it lesbo freaks#like i don't see how i haven't seen more people disturbed by the phrasing of these posts#i even saw girls like it's okay to joke about female idols being women attractors etc but at the end of the day it's a joke and all idols...#...are straight and queer women that identify with them or even are attracted to them are freaks#when i see so many posts every day i want to vomit of guy idols doing really routine shit like eating dinner or watching tv#with girls going on and on about how boyfriend coded that is that they're eating dinner#that's not annoying or delusional (and the amount they use delusional is concerning too i am just using it here to quote how they talk)#but you want to put your fist through a wall every time a woman says something like that about another woman#that says more about you hating queer women than it does caring about idols' privacy actually when it's only ever women talking about...#...women idols that i see people mad at and ~ uncomfortable~ with#and i just keep seeing it more and more lately. what makes me the maddest too is that people will post about liking women like it's a...#...safe space to do so but when it really comes down to it it's posts that are all i thought we were all joking about liking women#i saw so many girls that were livid saying some girls are straight that it was bonkers#it must be so hard to be someone logging on the internet every day going what about people that do conform :( what about us normal people :(
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Jean Valjean had only two thoughts: to hide his name and sanctify his life & escape from men and return to God
but he would sacrifice the first for the second, his safety for his virtue
he could not fire Javert because he would sacrifice his virtue if he fired Javert in that moment. Because Javert was actually right (despite being completely fooled at that time), and Javert was dangerous, and Valjean could make him go, but he couldn't because it wouldn't be right.
and that's literally it imho. Valjean as Madeleine acts with and around Javert (or anyone, really, Javert isn't special, Madeleine doesn't treat him any different than others) in a way that doesn't sacrifice his virtue. He will sacrifice his safety (i.e. Fauchelevent) but not his virtue
You can also see it in this imho:
“Javert, you are a man of honor, and I esteem you. You exaggerate your fault. Moreover, this is [another] offence which concerns me. Javert, you deserve promotion instead of degradation. I wish you to retain your post.” [Hapgood, but I added "another" since it's missing]
He can't punish Javert for being right. He alludes back to Fantine spitting on him. "Madeleine", not anyone or anything else, was wronged and he chose not to punish in both cases.
He might not like Javert; Javert has been troubling him, following him, he's been a danger to him (for almost 5 years), but he wouldn't sacrifice his virtue for Javert, and firing Javert would do that imho (and at that time, it would "soil Madeleine")
Javert, you deserve promotion instead of degradation. = is such a good irony, but it probably went over Javert's head completely. But moreover, that line literally makes no sense in context unless you consider "you are actually right" (and you don't know it; ironic, isn't it?)
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That's why I like Javert's line from LM 2000 (which might just be taken from somewhere from the book anyway) that goes: [Valjean] goes against order, against law, and against his own interests.
#leni reads les miserables#idk if this makes sense but i wanted to write it down#after reading valjean's struggling my opinion about jean = champ chapter didn't actually change#i think it was pretty clear that he was disturbed at the beginning and then he calmed down and became 'madeleine'#before reading this chapter i've seen 'javert has been annoying me' floating around and i really don't like the choice of 'annoy'#it has connotations that aren't supposed to be there imho#since the verb used in french is 'troubler'#but what do i know as esl#but none of the three translations in my native language translated it with anything resembling my understanding of 'annoy'#and wilbour doesn't either#javert#jean valjean
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Have you ever played/watched a playthrough of the game 12 Minutes? I think you'd like one of the reveals in it.
I did watch a full playthrough a while back. Unfortunately for this recommendation, I thought it was <3 stupid <3 No offense to anyone who likes it, I just thought the design of the loop in the first place was a bit clunky, the characters were sort of eh, and then the reveals themselves were, as I remember and as they played out on whatever stream I was watching, just kind of bad? A poorly put together story surrounded by poorly put together gameplay, but. like. willem dafoe was there ����
#truly no greater evidence of the fact that you can’t just put sudden incest in your game for your shocking twist and expect me to find it at#all interesting or thought-provoking or even like. god. i don’t know what emotion they wanted the reveal to prompt honestly.#certainly didn’t do anything for me or for whoever i saw streaming it.#like they were just fucking frustrated at how obtuse the game had gotten at that point. which generally in point and clicks is sort of#expected except that the nature of the time loop being so set in stone meant that the feeling of making no progress was made even more#irritating than it would usually be in such a game. anyway my point is they were fucking annoyed and the reveal just made them go :/ uhm.#okay? like not even really disgust or horror or anything at that point just like. yeah alright i guess this is new information i’m being#given. idk what to do with it though.#like i think the ‘incest all along’ sort of twist needs to really hook you with the characters first so that you’re invested in the#relationship before the curtain is pulled back. and invested in a way that depending on the story either makes you sort of have an internal#struggle with your own instinctive disgust against your investment because part of you wants these characters you like to be happy together#anyway while another part of you knows that there’s something disturbing happening here. or like the entire thing should have been written#in such a way that already had you on edge and this final puzzle piece confirms why and you sit back and soak in the horror.#i *think* 12 minutes wanted to be the second one? i saw ‘think’ because it failed at being either and in the end the twist went over like#a lead balloon. just sort of shit. like im the incest guy and even i thought it was shit. anyway.#ask#tw incest
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ok be real with me is it weird to write my downstairs neighbor a note about her sexcapades?
#I’m all for it!! i am!!#i just she’d be more..mindful?#i wish i was laying when i say our walls and floors are paper thin#it’s one of the reasons I’m heavily considering moving because i have to walk on eggshells as to not disturb her#she has the upper hand because no one is directly below her#so she can be as loud as she wants in terms of walking#all I’m asking for is a heads up#but i realize that that’s not her problem really? and she doesn’t owe me anything#idk her bedroom is where mine is so i hear everything and it’s annoying#the other solution is that i start being loud as fuck 🤷🏼♂️#and we’ll see who says what first lol
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I was finally able to see The Green Mile. My verdict?
#the green mile#frank darabont#tom hanks#michael clarke duncan#doug hutchison#sam rockwell#barry pepper#I was this 😭 for a significant portion of it#the worst part is that my mom walked into the room as ceratin horrifying scene was taking place#she was so upset she thought I was letting it play along 'cause I was desensitized over disturbing content#she actually thought I was rather enjoying it since I ellicited no reaction whatsoever#which offended me#but the truth of the matter is I was so shocked and horrified at the sequence that I simply couldn't keep my eyes off of the screen#and I wanted to sob my eyes off but my mom's constant nagging blocked the tears from flowing since I was so annoyed#I even apologized not once but twice for her having to witness such a calamity#i really did that#😒#film#cinema#streaming
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i like making aus
#deltarune#my art#ralsei#noelle deltarune#susie deltarune#deltarune au#this is supposed 2 be a deltaswap thing. lolz#susie swaps w kris noelle swaps w ralsei ralsei swaps w susie and i have to figure out the rest#you play (not really because at the moment i dont plan on making a fangame) as the soul#the red soul. uuuummmm something goes wrong during gaster's survey and you end up in this wacky world!!!!#susie senses a disturbance in the force or whatever so you don't actually possess her#she lets you make important decisions and do things in battle but shes a strong indipendent waman#then she gives you her old toy (cat thing in the border) to use as a vessel#it turns grey because its possessed#and noelle gives you a shirt#the gang knows that the soul exists and talks to you yippee#susie keeps the soul as a pet and is the leader of the party#more annoying things about this au coming later 🤓#im calling it triscript because its a cool name#triscript
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Here goes my "a week without mental breakdowns" streak.
Aka the week in which my sister was on vacation. Now just the thoguht of her being back brought me to the Edge of one.
👏👏👏
(Don't get me wrong tho, I love my sis and she doesn't do the stuff on purpose but STILL)
#tw mental health#tw breakdown#i mean i too dos stuff that triggers her#but that's stuff I can't really change#but when i ask her for ONE (1) tiny thing she CAN change#nope doesn't happen#and when she tells me to stop something I go extra miles to avoid her hearing me do it#but now i am tempted to just simnply not do that anymore until she's learned to close that frigging door corretly#now that also her boyfriend will come who closes the door (jsut hers the one i HATE being closed without pressing the handle down) the same#means twice as much noises#AND she will unpack her suitcase#and bc her bf is here she'll close her roomdoor for that#aka i can look forward to her opening and closing the time again and again and again and over and over and over again and again#I know I could ask her to PLS close it normaly#but last time i did...#she only told me what stuff I do that annoys her#I Changed mine#she didn't#so yeah#don't want another lecture of her telling me that the thigns I love to do (aka writing) disturb her#(my mom^s keyboard is exaclty the same. it sounds the same. but that is okay for her)#she has a problem with me chewing. BUT can lean agianst her boyfriend while he chews#and sorry that boy chews Way louder than I do#sometimes i feel like her misphonia s selective#mehh
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i hate the fact that this game is making me appreciate dmmd out of any other BL. then again i haven't played any particularly good ones but at least there were like 3/5 non-creepy routes in dmmd yk?
#togainu no chi was. disturbing#i loved the old guy until he said the protag reminded him of his son?? and then proceeded to have sex with him???#and don't even get me started on that goth twink#not the blonde one i think he was fine#hashihime of the old book town was soooo annoying. the two lis i liked ended up being major creeps#and in a secret route the protag ended up fucking with his adopted son???????#idk if dream daddy counts as BL since it's western but i liked that one. it's cute. and it has hot old men#but i really wish there were more BLs with dark stories and non-creepy LIs
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