#it’s cooking with flo bitches

[strawberryloveyyy]

Florence Pugh is the love of my life. Period. Someone please catch my breath, I’m too busy not breathing.

[littlexscarletxwitch]

I love her so much

[mattslolita]

bitch from da souf - c. sturniolo

black!fem reader x chris, backshots, oral ( fem receving )

do not interact if you're a minor!

"i throw that ass back to see if he gon catch it."

"hello everyone, today we're filming-"

"it's the deaf, mute, and blind baking challenge, period!" y/n grins at the camera, causing nick to glare at her playfully and slap her arm, "nick, what the fuck?"

"that was supposed to be my line," nick said, a fake annoyed tone, causing y/n to roll her eyes playfully.

"anyway!" matt begins, already sensing an oncoming play fight between the two best friends, "we need to decide who's what."

"i call deaf!" y/n grinned, holding her hand up as she looked at the three triplets, "i have the best music taste, let's not even lie."

"facts," nick agrees, pointing at y/n, "let's be mute together."

"you both just want an excuse to listen to music and not do shit," matt muses as he crosses his arms, causing y/n to nudge him playfully.

"you just mad cause you not gon be my deaf twin," y/n shrugs comically, causing matt and chris to roll their eyes.

"i guess i'll be mute then," chris says, and y/n snorts, causing him to glare at her, "what was that about?"

y/n just shrugged, a small smirk on her lips as she helped set up the ingredients. "it's just about time yo ass is finally gon be shut up."

matt's eyes go wide and nick holds back a laugh, whilst chris pokes his tongue inside his cheek and shakes his head at y/n, going to stand next to her as he bends down in her ear. "i can think of a million ways to shut you up, ma."

y/n cheeks heat up, giving chris's shoulder a smack as she gestures to the camera that was currently recording them — he just smirks and goes to get a blindfold while nick hands y/n a set of headphones.

y/n and nick grin at each other as the both of them have their headphones on, chris giving them a look as he's helping tie the blindfold around matt's eyes.

"OKAY, LET'S START!" y/n shouts, clapping her hands together, as she moves to lean on the counter next to chris, "yo matt, open this shit up!"

"oh my gosh, it's our song!" nick says to y/n excitedly, causing the girl's eyes to widen as she grins widely.

"oh bitch, period!" y/n says, beginning to dance as in the party by flo milli is playing in her ears, "yeah bitch i got yo man, since you bad hoe, come catch him if you can!"

matt taps on y/n shoulders as the girl begins dancing. "Y/N, HELP ME WITH THIS!"

y/n turns to matt with a grin, still dancing as she's trying to read his lips. "NO MATT, WE NOT COOKING FISH!"

chris shakes his head as he watches the girl, ultimately deciding to go and help matt once he sees matt throw his hands up in frustration.

"DICKS UP WHEN I STEP IN THE PARTY, YO MAIN DUDE WANNA FEEL ON MY BODY!" y/n and nick sing, dancing with each other, "AND IF I TAKE HIM BITCH, I WON'T SAY I'M SORRY!"

"i do what i want, don't report to nobody!" y/n sings, dancing next to chris, shooting the boy a grin as he's trying to help matt with the batter.

"nick, preheat the fucking oven!" matt yells at the oldest triplet, causing him to look at y/n in confusion as he's still singing.

y/n goes and playfully pushes chris to side, beginning to help matt with the batter. "MATT, I'M GONNA HELP YOU WITH THIS BATTER!"

"i've been telling you to do that for five fucking minutes!" matt yells back to her, and oblivious to his obvious annoyed tone, y/n just smiles at him and gives him a thumbs up.

y/n's eyes go wide as she points at nick again, a big grin taking over her face. "THIS IS MY SHIT, STOP PLAYING!"

"PERIOD!" nick yells, pointing back at y/n, as she starts dancing rather provacatively.

"i throw dat ass back to see if he gon catch it, ain't athletic but it's tennis for the necklace," y/n raps, swaying her hips back and forth.

chris suddenly stops what he's doing as he watches y/n glide her hips back and forth in the open space near the oven and sink, nick hyping her up as she does so — he's also ignored matt's pleas to help as all he can focus on is the way her ass moves up and down as she's dancing.

"ay where that cash at, i stack it like tetris!" she continues rapping, now seemingly in her own world as she continues dancing, "real gutter bitch, real plugs and connections."

chris still had his eyes on her, watching the way nick and her giggled as she continued dancing — she accidentally bumped into matt, causing the boy to groan and shake his head.

"SORRY, MATT!" y/n giggles, hugging the middle triplet then ruffling his hair, and he pushes her off of him causing her to roll her eyes.

"FIRST I MAKE HIM EAT IT TILL HE LOCK JAW," y/n continues rapping, throwing her hands up as she round the kitchen counter, "GIVE IT TO HIM GOOD, KNOCK A NIGGA SOCKS OFF!"

"i run it up, they busy runnin they mouth!" nick raps with y/n, hyping her up, as she goes back to where is, beginning to throw it back again.

"I'M A REAL ASS, RICH ASS, BITCH FROM THA SOUTH!" y/n raps, as she swaying whilst chris was next to her, the boy having had his breath caught in his throat.

chris was well aware that y/n and him were only best friends, but it was hard to look at her like that when since they had first met he'd get so sexually frustrated around her. of course, chris never knew that y/n had always found him attractive too, and would have to refrain from being around him sometimes due to this fact.

like right now, chris had the strong urge to just bend y/n over the kitchen table and fuck her from behind, making her scream his name — he shook his head to try and rid himself of these thoughts, going back to focusing trying to clean up the mess they made.

chris watched as y/n was still bopping her head to the song as she grabbed the tray away from matt, walking over to the oven — he watched the brownskin girl as she set the tray atop, then she bent over to open the oven.

he didn't even realize what he was doing until he reached y/n, gently taking her hips and pulling her ass to him in the hit it from behind motion.

"what the fuck- CHRIS!" y/n says, her eyes wide as she turns to look at him, shock evident on her face.

"couldn't help myself ma, with that ass shaking so pretty in front of me," chris whispers in her ear, pulling his bandana down slightly so she could hear him.

he gives her a wink and slips it back on, nick having watched the two with raised eyebrows. "great, now i have to edit that cause the fans will go crazy."

y/n felt her cheeks get hot at the action chris did, and the fact that he just walked away from her like he didn't just do that — the worst part was that she liked it, she wished he would've done more than that.

"FUCK!" nick yells, causing matt to throw his hands up in irritation, "WE FORGOT TO BUY FUCKING OVEN MITTS!"

"are you kidding me?" matt says angrily, taking his blindfold from off his eyes, looking at his brothers and best friend in shock, "who was in charge of that?"

the three brothers all turned towards y/n, who had finally looked up from where she had put the batch in, giving them confused expressions. "WHAT?"

"you forgot the buy the oven mitts!" matt says, throwing his hands up at her.

"shit, you said what, matt?" y/n asks with a sweet smile, taking the headphones off.

"you- just nevermind," matt sighs, running his hand along his face, motioning to nick, "nick, let's go and buy it real quick."

"fine, whatever," nick says with an eyeroll, taking the headphones off and pausing the music, "please don't do anything stupid while we're gone!"

"the fuck would we do?" y/n asks with a confused expression, and matt shoots her a look of amusement.

soon matt and nick are headed out the door, and y/n lets out a sigh — when she turns around, chris is standing right behind her, his usual smirk on his face as he looks down at the girl with hungry eyes. y/n's breath hitches in her throat at the way he's looking at her, causing her to back into the kitchen table.

"i was serious about what i said earlier, you know," chris says in a low rasp, putting both hands on the counter behind y/n, trapping her in between, "about knowing ways to shut you up."

"then why you ain't did it yet?" y/n challenges, feeling the pool already forming in between legs, as she almost lost balance.

"as much as i want to ma, i wanna have a taste of you instead," chris growls, his large hands going to grab the shorter girl and hoisting her onto the counter.

she immediately pulls him in by the neck and attaches her lips to his hungrily, both of them battling for dominance — chris pulls away slightly, his lips already red and swollen as he eyes the girl greedily, then he reattaches his lips to her neck, leaving sloppy kisses all over it.

he reaches down towards the waistband of her shorts, tugging at it as it snapped, causing a low gasp to escape her lips as she squeezes her brown thighs together. "fuck, i need you so bad."

"lean back mama, i'm gonna make you feel so good," chris whispers in her ear, pressing her stomach back.

y/n leans back and scoots back on the counter, giving him enough access to practically rip her shorts down from under her — he was immediately met with y/n's already glistening pussy, causing his cock to stiffen at the sight.

"look at you, not wearing any fuckin panties," he chuckles lowly, spreading her legs apart whilst keeping eye contact with her, "such a pretty pussy, ma."

"p-please, chris," y/n whimpers, "i need-"

without warning, chris dives in between y/n's legs, not wasting time in licking a stripe up her sensitive bundle of nerves, emitting a moan from the girl. he greedily latches his hands onto het thighs, pulling her closer to him as if she'll somehow slip from his grasp.

"fuck chris, that feels so good," y/n moans out, throwing her head back as her hands find themselves tangled into his brown locks.

he continues pleasuring her with his tongue, burying his face deep inside her pussy as he flicks his tongue on it every which way — y/n lets out moans, filling up the empty space of the kitchen.

"oh fuck, you taste so good," chris says breathlessly, pulling away, his face glistening in her juices.

he dives back in, reveling in the sweet taste of her, knowing that nobody could ever make her feel as good as he is in this moment.

"chris, i-i'm close," y/n moans out, her head still thrown back.

this causes him to finally take his face out of her pussy, a smirk on his face as he does so, which causes her to look at him in confusion. "w-why would you stop?"

"cause you're gonna cum on this cock, ma," chris said, "now bend that ass over."

y/n obliges, getting up from the counter and going to turn around — chris quickly pulls his pants down, his cock springing free and slapping against his stomach as it leaks with pre-cum.

he lines himself up with y/n, using her juices as lube as he strokes it once, causing a groan to escape his lips and a moan to slip out her mouth.

"just put in already!" y/n begs.

chris grins as he slowly pushes inside of her, a moan falling from both of their lips. "fuck, you're so tight."

chris begins to move in and out of her at a slow pace at first, the soft slapping of skin can be heard — y/n moans at the feeling of her best friend going in and out of her, having been waiting for this moment for forever.

chris quickly picks up his pace, now slamming into her from behind — y/n grips the kitchen counter in front of her, her breasts bouncing as he fucks into her.

"oh my gosh, fuck chris!" y/n whines out, as he goes to attach his lips to her neck, one of his hands going to cup her breast as the other stays on her waist.

"fuck ma, you feel so fucking good around my cock like this," chris pants out, squeezing her nipple in between his index and thumb fingers.

"i-i'm so close, baby," y/n moans out, throwing her head back, "i'm gonna cum..."

"cum on my cock ma, give it to me," chris rasps, still pounding into her from behind.

y/n releases her juices onto chris's cock, moaning his name as she does so — that's enough for chris too, as he shoots his loud out inside of her, moaning her name as he does.

he helps the both of them ride out their highs, then chris pulls out of y/n, both catching their breaths as the reality of what happened sets in.

"fuck, i've wanted to do that for so long," chris breathes out, helping y/n put her shorts back on.

"you ain't know how long i wanted you to," y/n giggles, looking up at chris, "is this gonna change shit between us?"

"nah," chris says, smiling down at the girl, pulling his pants up, "but let's just keep this between us, alright?"

"you right, matt gon throw a hissy fit if he ever found out," y/n laughed, grabbing some paper towels to clean up the space they occupied.

chris sent a smack to y/n's ass, causing her to gasp and turn to him with a playful glare. "didn't you touch my ass enough?"

"who says i ever got enough of it?" chris grins at her, licking his lips as he walks over to her and squeezes her ass.

"yeah, you definitely an ass dude."

@luverboychris , @mrssturnioloo , @mattsturniolosleftnut 💕 gfs ily

omgggg look who finally wrote some more smut !!😩😩😩 i got hella requests too, so im excited for y'all to read that too ! im so sorry not uploading any, i've lost a little motivation for it, but im tryna bounce back.💌

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Black Widow

Pairing: Florence Pugh × Fem!Reader

Summary: Cooking With Flo is back and you make an accidental cameo that get the entire world to know about your relationship with Florence

Disclaimer: English is not my first language

MASTERLIST

Florence took a step away from her phone to make sure it was recording the way it should, her eyes studying the screen as a smile slowly formed on her lips. It took just a second for the comments to start showing up on the screen fast enough that she barely had time to read one before it disappeared to show other ones. She stayed quiet for a few more seconds to allow more people to start watching the live on her Instagram before she actually started talking.

“Sup, bitches? Here we are with another Cooking With Flo,” she said the famous words she always used to start her lives. She opened her arms as if to show the kitchen behind her and let out her raspy laugh. “Did you guys miss me? It's been a while, I know, but I'm back and this time we're making lasagna.”

For the last five months, she had done none of the livestreams cooking in her kitchen mostly because the space was a mess. The room was being renewed and, on top of that, she barely had time to do anything other than work and make sure people were painting the walls with the right color. But now she finally had time again, so that’s how she ended up standing in the middle of her kitchen on a random Saturday night.

“It's very simple, but it was a requested dish for tonight, so that’s what we're doing,” Florence kept talking, leaning back against the counter with her elbows to read some of the comments the fans were making. She saw a few questions, dozens of hearts, and some country flags, but her eyes quickly picked someone asking if there would be any guests tonight. “No, it’s only me cooking tonight, but I'm not alone.” Florence looked around and easily spotted her dog lying down a few feet from where she was standing. She leaned down to snap her fingers at him, which made him get up and walk towards her while wiggling his tail. Chuckling, Florence picked him up with some effort because he certainly wasn’t a small dog. “Billy's here! Come on, Billy, tell people hi.” The only reaction the dog gave was a low bark before he tried to lick her face. Florence moved away the best she could laughing at the same time. “Oh, God, you're getting too heavy for me to lift you, boy,” she complained and then put the dog back on the floor, where he wasted no time walking away to lie down one more time. Florence put her hands on her waist and smiled widely. “Jeez, guys. Well, let me wash my hands and we can get started.”

Florence had just turned around to go to the sink behind her when she heard a scream piercing through the house.

"AAAAAAAAH!"

The chain reaction was instant. Forgetting about anything else, Florence turned on her feet while yelling back: “Holy fuck! Babe?!”

The live kept going on her phone but the people watching could just glance at her wide eyes and surprised expression before she ran from the frame, the phone completely forgotten. They couldn’t see her anymore, but she didn’t wander far away. Just as she was about to get out of the kitchen and run to where she heard the scream coming from, someone came running from the hallway and almost bumped into her, making her stop.

“Florence!” You screamed again, although this time you were already pressed against her.

Florence instantly put her arms around you while her eyes tried to find the reason why you were yelling. She was trying to find a bruise, a cut, or blood of any type, but there was nothing on you that caught her eyes besides the sheer panic clear in your face. “What is it?!” She asked, though she was having a hard time even keeping standing since you were pushing against her as if you were running away from something. “Babe?!”

You managed to slip past her and go further into the kitchen all while using your hands to keep grabbing Florence’s shoulders as if she was the only thing keeping you safe. “Oh, my God! There's a monster inside the bathroom!”

Upon hearing that, Florence couldn’t help but blink in surprise, tilting her head to the side and trying to understand what you meant by that. “A what?”

It was her sudden change in humor that made you look at Florence with even more urgency. She was too calm, she clearly didn’t understand how grave that was. “It almost killed me!”

Your tone had the opposite effect, though. Florence kept looking at you for a few more seconds before her signature breathless smile cut the silence that had formed between you two. Her shoulders dropped, as did her hands to your waist, and she let her head hang for a moment to bask in the relief she felt for realizing there was no imminent danger as she initially thought there was. If it was anything as bad as you were making it sound, you certainly wouldn’t be acting that dramatically.

Finally, she shook her head and looked up at you again with a smile. “I'm pretty sure there's not a monster inside our bathroom. Haven't you watched Scooby Doo?” Florence joked.

It made you whine, however, because you couldn’t believe she couldn’t see the danger you were in. “Florence,” you complained.

Florence must have noticed you were getting mad for her lack of concern because she just chuckled again and approached you to kiss your cheek. “Okay, babe, I'm going to take a look,” she conceded.

Now more relaxed and with a pout, you nodded and let go of Florence’s shoulders so she could walk away from you. “Take care!” You yelled to her retreating form.

Florence kept walking until she reached the bathroom in the hallway. The door was open and the light was still on, but she poked her head inside first. She saw nothing out of the ordinary, so she decided to ask you again, keeping her voice loud and clear for you to hear her from the kitchen. "Again, I don’t think-” Florence interrupted herself out of a sudden when her eyes finally spotted the thing that had disturbed you. “Oh,” she breathed out.

Inside the kitchen, you were biting on the pad of your thumb as you waited for her. “Do you see it? It's right there by the sink!”

Florence smiled to herself while she saw the little spider weaving her web down peacefully as if there was nothing wrong in the world. “Yeah, I see it,” she replied with amusement clear in her voice.

“Take care!” You exclaimed again, but that was what finally caught the attention of the other occupant of the house. Billy, now alert because of the commotion, got up with his ears pointing up and started to go after his owner to see what was going on, but you quickly leaned down to scoop him from the floor. “Oh, my God, Billy, don't go there!”

“Can you bring me a bowl?” Florence asked.

“What for?” You frowned and moved the big dog a bit when your arms started to get tired. Maybe you should start going to the gym, after all.

Florence’s reply came quickly. “So I can take this little guy outside.”

You gasped in shock. “You wanna touch it?!”

The other woman laughed again. “No, that's what the bowl is for!” You rolled your eyes fondly at her teasing. “Come on, babe.”

You bit your bottom lip and looked around. There were several bowls around the counters that she had put there to put the ingredients while she cooked, but there was no way you would go back to that bathroom again when the life-threatening monster was still there. “I can't get any closer than this.”

“That's okay, I will go get it,” Florence soothed your nerves and, a second later, you heard her coming back to the kitchen.

You couldn’t keep Billy on your lap for longer so you put him down gently, only to have him running to meet Florence, who was just entering the room again. Florence was smiling, although she wasn’t making fun of you - at least yet - and she walked towards you to peck your cheek. It seemed like it was just a gesture to try to hide her smile, but you weren’t going to complain about it.

She had just turned to grab one of the bowls when her eyes caught her cell phone on top of the counter and she immediately stopped in her tracks as her heart dropped to the floor. “Oh.”

You jumped away from the counter like it was catching fire. “What?! There's another one here?!”

Florence’s gaze moved to you for a brief moment though she couldn’t stop looking at the millions of comments and emojis appearing on her screen for too long. “Uh, no.”

You followed her eyes and it was your turn to feel the dread inside. In your panicked state, you forgot Florence was doing a live. You hadn’t just interrupted it, you had walked on it. Literally. You could see yourself standing in the middle of the recording, Florence just a few steps to the side looking like a deer caught in headlights as her eyes kept moving from her phone to you.

People didn’t even know you existed and there you were now. People didn’t know Florence Pugh had a girlfriend. People didn’t know she was only making lasagna tonight because you told her that’s what you were craving.

“Shit,” you mumbled. “Oh, shit. I forgot you were going live.” You took a step back and put your hands on your face to hide the deep blush that took over your cheeks. “Oh, no.”

Noticing you were a step away from going on a full-on panic attack, Florence approached you and gently pulled you closer to her body. She tilted her head to the side to give you the perfect spot to hide your face in the crook of her neck and you took full advantage of that. There was no point in trying to hide now that the cat was out of the bag. People had seen you already, they certainly heard Florence calling you “babe” and saw her kissing your cheek.

You silently reached the same decision in the few seconds you stayed in each other’s embrace. When Florence pulled away, she held your face between her hands and offered you a smile that put you at ease instantly. “Hey, it’s okay. Don’t worry, okay?” She winked at you. “I will be right back, let me just take out the monster for you.”

Florence kissed your forehead before grabbing a bowl and walking back to the bathroom. You thought about stepping away from the camera, maybe going back to hide in your shared room as you usually did when Florence was making content when you were around, but you barely had the time to think about where to go before your girlfriend was back in the kitchen.

“I'm back, folks.” she declared to her phone while walking to put the bowl inside the sink since she couldn’t use it anymore. After that, Florence turned back to face the camera and leaned against the counter with both hands, smiling. “It wasn’t a monster, it was just a little spider,” Florence told to the people watching the live.

Standing beside her, all you could do was mumble: “It was a monster.”

Your reaction dragged another laugh from Florence - the laugh that you loved so much, deep and husky, and that made her nose scrunch in that adorable way that always made you want to kiss her. “Thank God you're dating Black Widow herself, huh?” She nudged you with her shoulder, clearly teasing you.

Affected by her smile and her expressive eyes, you easily forgot there were literally millions of people watching you two at that moment. “I don't think that would be a reason to brag considering you would kill me in the end,” you replied, amused. “Besides, I'm not dating Scarlett.”

Her gasp was so loud that even Billy barked from where he was sitting staring up at you two. “Hey, I just saved you from a terrible monster!” Florence complained, although it was obvious she wasn’t serious. “Show me some love.”

You rolled your eyes again, but the smile on your face couldn’t be ignored. “You're right.” You nodded and leaned over to kiss the tip of her nose. “Thank you, my darling savior.”

Her nose scrunched again and a low chuckle left her lips before she pulled away with a more somber expression. She looked at you as if she was trying to hold a silent conversation and, gladly, you understood what she was asking without saying a word. You only nodded and braced yourself for what was about to come.

Florence returned her attention to her phone and her smile became a more practical one. “Well, I think you guys are a little confused. That's not how I planned for you guys to find out, but that's okay. We're just going to recalculate,” she chuckled politely. “In case you hadn’t realized it since this shenanigans started, this is my girlfriend.” Florence placed her arm around your waist, pulling you closer and smiling contently with her eyes glued on you. It seemed like you couldn’t look away from each other for a while, but she eventually returned her attention to the several comments popping on her screen. “Yes, I kept it a secret until now. And yes, I was intending to keep it under the rug for a while longer, but mostly because I did not want you scaring her away,” she joked since you both knew the reason why your relationship was a secret was because you were both trying to protect your privacy and your love from prying eyes. “She was the one that said she was feeling like eating lasagna tonight, actually,” Florence added.

You nodded, feeling more relaxed to be standing there now. “She got her grandma's recipe, I couldn't resist.”

“Since the cat is out of the bag…” She read a few comments, deciding to answer them as she went. “We've been dating for a while, yes. This is our kitchen, actually.” Florence pointed to something behind her. “Well, it’s still coming together. We still want to make some changes,” she relented since you both know none of you were satisfied with the place the fridge was placed. “Uh, she’s not an actress, if that’s what you want to know, another reason why we didn't say anything about us.” Florence kept from telling her fans what you actually do with your life, trying to maintain any sense of privacy still. “Yes, she knows my family. Guys, I will answer two more questions before we move on. Now that I saved her life and our bathroom, I believe Y/N wanted to take a shower before dinner,” she joked.

You laughed and agreed with several nods, also licking your lips to add to the dramatization. Your attention ended up going to one of the comments that showed up and you decided to answer it. “Billy ran to me at the dog park, that’s how we met,” you explained shyly.

Florence seemed happy that you spoke up, though, and she proved that by leaning closer to kiss your cheek for the third time. She then moved on to pick the last comment she was going to reply to. “No, she’s not going to feature in the next Cooking With Flo unless she wants to. Or unless there’s another teeny tiny spider forcing her to run to me.” She poked your side at the exact spot that she knew would get you squirming away and that’s what happened, of course.

“It wasn’t small,” you argued as your body moved away from her. “I'll go so you can keep filming.” You turned around to leave, but changed your mind last minute, choosing to say: “I'm sorry to crash in.”

“Don't need to apologize, babe,” Florence assured you firmly and, before you knew what was going on, she pulled you in for a quick kiss. “I love you, okay?” She whispered against your lips, making sure no one else could hear it.

“I love you more,” you replied gladly in the same tone before walking away. “See you once you get my food ready!”

Florence laughed while she watched you disappear from her sight and then looked back at her phone to clap her hands once and say: “Well, so let's get started!”

[obessedwithfictionalmen]

Co-Stars pt.15

Callum Turner X Actress! Reader

Summary: Y/n is invited of cooking with Flo and gets a little drunk.

Warning: Kinda cringe (I'm sorry)/ alcohol/ Swearing/ use of Y/n/

Word count: 790 words

Florence Pugh invited her on her cooking show. She was excited to go with her, she loved to cook, and she was friends with Flo. She brought Callum with her, and Callum brought Austin. When she arrived, she hugged Florence and took the apron that she gave her. It was a white one with pomegranate all over it. ‘’I’m so excited!’’ she squeals. Y/n chuckles and kiss Callum before Florence goes live.

‘’It’s cooking with Flo, bitches!’’ she puts the knife in the cutting board. ‘’And Y/n is here!’’ Flo exclaims, hugging her again. ‘’Hey everyone! How’s everyone doing?’’ they look in the chat for the answers and then, they look at each other before laughing for no reason. ‘’Guys, today we’re going to do chicken Cajun alfredo, or whatever the order is. But for the drink, I made Y/n’s favorite, a rum n’ coke!’’ she gives her the glass and they tap their glass together before starting to pace around the kitchen to get the ingredients. ‘’By the way, if you hear people talking behind, it’s my husband and my husband’s husband’’ Y/n laughs. Austin, Callum and Florence burst out laughing, Y/n is proud of her joke, as she joins the group laughing.

‘’So now the chicken is seasoned – ‘’ Y/n impulsive thought took control as she slapped the chicken, like she would slap someone’s ass. ‘’- Mate, what the fuck’’ Florence’s smoker laugh took over her laugh, which made Y/n laugh even more. ‘’How many drinks did they have?’’ Austin asked, chuckling. ‘’I don’t know’’ Callum laughed. Y/n was out of breath from laughing so much. ‘’Okay, where were we?’’ she laughed again. Florence took a sip of her drink before looking at her friend. ‘’We have to cook the chicken’’ she explained. ‘’Oh, we should put music!’’ Y/n suggested. Florence nodded before she hit shuffle on her playlist, the first song that came to their ear was Vente Pa’ Ca by Ricky Martin ft Maluma. ‘’I love that song!’’ Y/n exclaimed as she took Florence hands to dance. ‘’The chicken is going to burn, love’’ Callum warned. As Y/n lip synced, Florence quickly took care of the piece of meat.

The pasta was almost done, so was the chicken, Florence and Y/n had about 3 drinks, Austin and Callum’s cheeks were hurting from laughing so much; Y/n was unhinged. Every thought that went through her head, she shared it. ‘’I think I would’ve been burned alive if I lived in Salem when the trial happened, because I have great tits and an opinion.’’ She said, touching the side of her tits, laughing. ‘’I’m hot, they want to make me hotter’’ she giggled. Florence face palmed as she stirred the pastas. ‘’I think you had enough to drink’’ Callum laughed. Y/n nods in agreeing with him. ‘’We’re going to take a little bit of pasta water before dumping it. That’s the secret, pasta water!’’ Y/n exclaims as she takes a scoop of the pasta water. ‘’Someone in the chat said that Callum and Austin are the parents and we’re the children’’ Florence laughs.

‘’Ok! It’s done! Look at how pretty it is!’’ Y/n says as she shows the plate to the camera. ‘’Austin, Callum, come and taste!’’ Florence says. The boys come behind the girls, Callum puts his hands on Y/n’s waist, making her giggle. ‘’That smells amazing!’’ Austin comments. ‘’Yeah, it does!’’ Callum adds. As they take a bite of the food, Y/n and Florence looks at each other. ‘’It’s so fucking good!’’ Y/n exclaims. Florence nods and chuckles. ‘’Babe, you need to come on the show more often’’ Florence says. ‘’I’ll gladly come back’’ Y/n smiles. Austin and Callum take a bite at the food and smile. ‘’That is Gordon Ramsey level’’ Austin exclaims. ‘’It’s really good, oh my! I love it’’ he smiles.

‘’Okay guys, so that was cooking with Flo and Y/n, bitches! See you next time!’’ Florence says as she stops her live. ‘’That was really fun! Thank you so much for the invite’’ Y/n hugs Flo. ‘’You’re welcome here any time. Maybe with less drinks’’ She laughs. Callum agrees as he puts his arm around Y/n’s waist. ‘’Ouh! Next time we can cook shrimp tacos!’’ Y/n proposed. Florence nods as she says goodbye to Austin.

The aftermath of the video on the internet is good. People are saying that Drunk Y/n is unhinged, the fact that Y/n called Austin her husband’s husband is funny, Florence needs to invite Y/n again, Callum’s love contact is physical touch and many more stuff. Y/n was a little bit embarrassed about things she said, but overall she had a really great time, and she wanted to do it again…

[wandafiction]

Cooking With Flo

Warning: None, just pure fluff.

“Hey bitches it’s cooking with Flo. Today we are doing it Live so send your questions and I will see how many we can answer.” 

You watch with a smile as Florence puts the tip of the knife into the wooden chopping board smiling into her phone. You are standing behind the phone, off camera leaning against the kitchen island simply watching your wife as she flutters around the kitchen getting everything she needs ready. You had always loved watching Flo in the kitchen. She always seemed so happy and free, which made you happy and the smile on your face shows it. Your smile grows when Flo looks up from her task sending you a small wink then looking down to her phone chuckling to herself.

“Yes, the other Mrs Pugh is here with us today. Baby say hello to everyone.” 

“Hello internet.” You simply speak hoping the phone picks it up, as you want to finish your coffee before making your way onto camera, which you usually do as the food is in the oven to answer any fan questions. 

“Baby I meant come around and say…You know what doesn’t matter everyone is saying hi back.” She rolls her eyes with a giggle as she grabs an onion and puts it on the chopping board. “Okay so today we are going to be cooking something real simple. Chilli con Carne. Why you may ask? Well it is Y/n’s favourite and I thought I would treat my favourite girl.”

You smile, blowing her a kiss which she pretends to catch and put in her apron pocket. Taking another sip of your coffee you simply watch as Florence answers a few comments about upcoming projects, how she is and saying thank you every time someone compliments her. 

“So with the onion you just gotta take her bottom off, then take her top off.” You hold in a laugh placing your hand over your mouth as Florence seems to realise what she has said. She points the knife to the camera with a fake look of seriousness. “Cheeky, don't think like that.”

You shake your head taking another sip of coffee before it comes back out of your nose as the laugh you were holding in finally makes an appearance. As you choke Florence breaks out into a fit of laughter, doubling over as her arm wraps under her ribs, the other placing the knife back down on the side. You fan your face, the coffee leaves a painful sting in your nose, your eyes watering as Florence slowly crouches down till she is sat on the floor in tears of laughter.

“Oh-my-god…I…Can’t be-lieve you did that.” She says between her loud laughs as you continue to cough trying to clear your throat and nose of coffee.

You make your way around the island to where the tap is, quickly running the cold water and putting most of your face under it as you try to wash away the spat up coffee, completely forgetting that Florence is Live on instagram. You remove your face from the water, cupping your hands underneath and splashing the water over your face a few times before harshly rubbing your hands against it. You turn the tap off, shaking your head and hands to try and dry them a little before turning around to see Flo still on the floor in a ball of laughter. 

You lift the bottom of your shirt up to wipe your face dry, then pull it off chucking it on the floor deciding to deal with it later. The moment your shirt hits the floor Flo is quick to stand and jump in your arms causing you to stumble back a little as you catch her. You let out a small laugh as she mumbles against the skin of your neck, not hearing a single thing she said.

“Baby, I didn't catch what you said.” 

“I said you are on camera and no one is allowed to see what's under your shirt but me.” She whines softly, making you laugh more.

“Cuddle bug, they already know what it looks like ever since that video of you stalking me in the gym got out.” Florence's face flushes a bright red at the memory of the day she was posting on her instagram story and instead of putting the video of you working out on her private story it went onto her public one. By the time she realised it was too late and most of her fanbase had already seen you in shorts and a sports bra.

“Doesn’t mean I have to share you with them now though. And that was an accident.” You carefully place Flo back on the ground with a small chuckle as she pouts so you are quick to lean down and peck her lips a few times until she smiles. You make your way to her phone looking at the comments that are flooding in.

“See, the people want me to help you cook in just my sweatpants and bra. And if the people want it then there is nothing I can do.” You laugh loudly when Flo’s hand comes into contact with your shoulder bouncing on your toes to get away from her as she goes for another hit.

“Get back here Mrs Pugh!” She quickly chases after you as you run around the island, once stopping back in front of the phone as she stops behind it eyeing you up like her prey. 

“Hey! We are not children. We are respectable adults who just…well just…just chase each other sometimes.” You answer the comments that are calling the two of you children as the comment section fills with laughing face emojis. 

“I am going to get you.” You smirk at Flo’s empty threat grabbing her phone so you can put music on knowing the one thing that will get her to not completely beat you up in front of thousands of fans. 

“Sure you will, darling. Because you, Miss Florence Pugh, are the best runner in the Pugh household.” You squeal as Flo darts around the island just as you put her phone back down and the room fills with sudden music. 

After a few minutes of trying to chase you around Flo gives up and goes back to her cooking show, apologising to her fans for the unfortunate mishap of a childish wife. Flo looks up to you with a soft smile back on her face as she starts to prepare the meal once more. You smile wide as you see Florence swaying her hips side to side in time to the music singing every few lyrics, still a bit camera shy when it comes to her voice. 

You decide to take the risk of reappearing on camera in just your sports bra and sweatpants as you move to stand behind Florence, wrapping your arms around her waist as you place your chin on her shoulder; having to bend down a little to match her height. She continues to sway a little in your arms as you watch the comments roll in, smiling softly when you hear her voice become more confident as she chops a red pepper. 

You smile wide when Dancing Queen starts playing and you peel yourself off of Flo and start dancing to the beginning of the song, swaying your hips, as you move to wash your hands knowing Flo will need a hand in a minute to get everything mixed together. You start singing as you dry off your hands causing Florence to turn around and look at you with a wide smile, she had always loved your voice and loved when you felt confident enough to sing in front of her; and at this point her fans. 

You hold your hand out for her to take, which she easily does and you quickly pull her into you. You sing to her as you spin her under your arm, her smile and laugh causing you to smile widely and spin her around again. You pull her back into you, keeping her hand in yours, your other one landing on her waist as you sway the both of you side to side playfully and definitely not in time with the music. Your goofiness pays off as Flo pushes away from you before spinning back towards you, your arm ending up wrapped around her as you continue to sway.Her back is to her phone as you shout the lyrics to one another and start jumping around the kitchen in time with the music.

“You are the dancing queen. Young and sweet. Only Seventeen.” You pick up a wooden spoon holding it up to your mouth pretending it's a mic as Flo heads back over to her phone looking through the comments that are flooding in, they must be good because the smile on her face only gets bigger.

You sway your body dancing from one foot to the other as you continue to sing, pointing at Florence as you do so. “Dancing Queen. Feel the beat from the tambourine, oh yeah! You can dance, you can jive!”

“Go Mrs Pugh.” You dance over to Flo as she cheers you on, reading some of her comments. “That's right, my wife can sing, dance and jive. She's the whole package!”

You grab onto her waist with your free hand spinning her to look at you, holding the mic between you both as you sing the last few lyrics to each other. “Having the time of your life. Ooh, see that girl. Watch that scene. Digging the dancing queen. Digging the dancing queen.”

You both laugh with wide smiles as you wrap your arms around her waist pulling her back against your front as you walk the both of you back to her phone. Her hands land on the table as you both look at the comments that are flowing in, most of them hyping the both of you up, some just many random letters.

“What does that mean baby?” Florence points to one of the many keyboard smashes and it makes you giggle.

“That my love is a gay keyboard smash. It’s a good thing, don't you worry.” 

“Hmm, is that like the whole gay panic thing?” You chuckle with a nod.

“Yeah most of your fans are gay my love. They are very jealous of me but also proud that I managed to get to you before some man did.” You see Florence roll her eyes on the livestream, squeezing her hips in response. 

“Well I’m happy I found you when I did Mrs pugh.” She tilts her head to kiss the underside of her jaw and you see a bunch of awws race up the side of her screen.

“I love you Mrs pugh.” You look down at her as you say it, making a toothy smile appear, her nose scrunching as you bring your lips down to hers in a small kiss, this time remembering you are live streaming. 

“I love you too Mrs Pugh.” She returns easily once she pulls her lips away from yours.

“Yes we love you all too.” You say to the phone as you see a bunch of pouting emojis, which have been deemed the Florence Pugh pout, asking if you love them to.

“Yes we most definitely love all of you guys.” You squeeze her hips again making her look back up to you.

“I am going to get a shirt on, and even though I love you very much I love food just that bit more and my stomach is crying out for it.” You say it with a smile so she knows that you are only partially serious because you do not want to be sleeping on the couch.

“Okay. go get yourself sorted baby, I will call you if I need help.” She quickly pecks your lips as you remove your arms from her waist.

“Goodbye internet.” You stroll out of the kitchen, smiling when you hear Flo start her show again before she calls your name and you look around to see why.

“The internet says bye Mrs Pugh.” You chuckle at her goofy smile as she holds the camera in one hand so she can get you in the frame as her face peaks up from the bottom of the camera.

“I love you.” You shake your head blowing Florence a kiss and sending the camera a small wave, laughing when you hear Florence shout back to you.

“I looooove you too, baby!”

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

[saoirse-ronan]

"Hey! This is Cooking with Flo, bitches!"

[beetlecakes]

I’m unfortunately going through a Pixar cars hyperfixation at 19

So here’s some lightning McQueen headcanons bc i am mentally ill💅🌈✨

Bleach blond hair with dark brown roots

Grew up in a trailer park

I feel like lightning McQueen crocs would still exist and he’d always be seen wearing them after races

Constantly on Twitter

Like he’d get into an accident on the track and post sm like “I lived bitches” with a picture of him in the hospital bed giving a thumbs up

Would probably post on tiktok like grwm videos but the voice over would him being sassy the whole time

Would hide an injury not bc he’s embarrassed but bc he would literally forget to bring it up (me frfr)

Can’t swim

Skater

Will make fun of Doc for being old but will 100% love all of his music

Like he steals all of his CD’s and tapes

Loves taylor swift but won’t admit it

Cries when listening to mirrorball

Can’t cook

Takes lessons from Flo but much rather have someone cook for him

Horrible driver off the track

Always hits a curb

Gets speeding tickets constantly

Has made Doc a Father’s Day card before

[argumentativeaxolotl]

MORE CARS HUMANIZED HEADCANNONS⁉️⁉️ REAL⁉️⁉️⁉️ NOT CLICKBAIT⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️

Lightning McQueen:

- my man cannot cook for the life of him. Dawg was let in the kitchen once(one time) and somehow managed to burn the water. He can only make(and is only allowed to make) cereal

- he 110% had an emo phase in highschool/middle school and it was as every bit of painful-“it’s-not-a-phase-mom���-cringe you could think of 💀💀💀

- he really really really fucking likes Cheesecake Factory for some reason. Specifically their bread(it’s bussin) and the club sandwhiches(probably reminds him of Flo)

- he is a food black-hole. Like as soon as that shit is in front of him that shit is gone. And he can and will eat up to like three times his body weight 😭

- he got a shitty tattoo of his lucky sticker when he was first starting out as a racer and would not let anybody fix it up since it meant a lot to him and still does. He eventually offered for Ramone to fix it up, showing how much he trusts the man.

- he’s actually a very very good reader and loved books until Harv(bitch) knocked the habit out of him

Chick Hicks:

- he also cannot cook for shit, but he can make a few more things than Lightning and what he CAN cook actually tastes really fucking good. Like he makes basic ass things but he gives them ✨pizzazz✨ and that shit tastes better.

- he fucking hates traveling and often wishes that his racing job didn’t have him moving all over the country during the season. He’d much rather prefer to stay at home in California.

- he gets very twitchy and nervous whenever he’s traveling and constantly double-triple-and even quadruple checks everything he has to make sure he doesn’t forget something important. He just gets super nerved up and pissier than usual.

- he’s got a phenomenal sense of hearing. Like it’s very weirdly good. Like he’ll hear a fly buzzing around in a loud-ass room. His hearing is so fucking good, it’s considered nearly super-human.

- he puts rocks in snowballs.

- he legit starts fucking tweaking whenever anybody mentions the Camel Incident.

- he adores animals. Like he’s a huge animal lover and he gets it from his mother. His favorite places to visit as a child were any aquarium or zoo, only second to a race track.

Strip Weathers:

- he has a very very long criminal record from his reckless teen years.

- he probably would’ve been a horse girl.

- he knows what My Little Pony is.

- my man watches a lot of adult swim TV shows and he particularly likes the older Simpsons stuff and South Park.

- he had a twin brother. They’re fraternal twins and said brother is Cal’s dad.

- he has so many fucking random skills that nobody would necessarily need, but could… come in handy…?(some of them). He just has a list of weird fucking shit he can do well. He can play the harp, piano, and banjo. He can throw metal sticks and axes with weirdly good aim. He can also sing with his mouth closed, spin a pen extremely well with a variety of tricks, whistle with his fingers, moonwalk very very well, and speak fluent mandarin.

- when he was younger he studied all of the speed laws in his state- and neighboring states- so he could use loopholes to get out of speeding tickets.

- he’s the mom of every friend group he’s in. He’s prepared for everything.

[noturlondonboy]

No More Excuses//Katelena

Masterlist

Pairing: Kate Bishop x Yelena Belova

Summary: Kate Bishop enjoys a relaxed and well deserved Christmas with the Barton family and stays with them into the new year. But once she returns home to New York, she finds that someone had been waiting for her to get back from her holiday vacation. A certain Black Widow assassin.

——

Yelena Belova spends Christmas Day cold, miserable, and alone. The loss of Natasha sits heavy on her chest, and now that she has nowhere to elsewhere channel her anger and grief, Yelena has no choice but to rot in it. Or perhaps she can make an effort to befriend the newest Hawkeye.

Warnings: mental illness, medication, depression, anxiety, talk of character death, fight scenes, blood, gore, weapons, injuries, the Red Room, nightmares, angst, alcohol, harassment, intoxication, drugs, talk about/implied adult content, death, PTSD, trauma, assault, talk of overdose, talk of suicide, talk of self harm, talk of sexual assault, men being horrible, stupid lesbian pinning.

Status: ongoing

Intruder- But Wait, She’s Hot!

Déjà Vu is a Funny Thing, Funny Thing

Common Interest Between an Assassin and a Dog

The Angel of Death Made Me Bacon

Prison Sentence for Two (2)

What are You Running From?

Vodka Will Fix Us

Ice Skates Never Broke Any Hearts

When it Rears it’s Ugly Head

Knock-Knock, Boo! It’s Your Trauma

So Let’s Just Talk

Haunted and Preyed Upon

What Would She Think?

Homocide. Homosexual?

There is Room for Two Puppers in This Town

School Can Wait, Katniss Needs Cuddles

Abdominal Muscles = Kate’s Roman Empire

Leave it to Nintendo…

We Have Animals to Cross, Kate Bishop

Welcome to Cooking With Flo, Bitches!

But He’s Just Some Scrawny Irish Dude

All’s Well That Sleds Well

All Surprises are Unexpected

The Arrow Doesn’t Fly Far From the Tree

Steak Out

Bodies are Made to Bleed

Bandaids Don’t Fix Bullet Holes

Lavender Haze is a Privilege I’ve Lost

Dread- to Fear Greatly; Be in Extreme Apprehension Of

Ideals of Shame

When We Finally Blur the Lines

Honeymoon Phase

Hawkeye Adventures Montage

Tselovat’

Bare Your Teeth as You Bleed

Breaking Point

Contessa Valentina Allegra de Fontaine

[togrowoldinv]

Cooking with Vogue

Florence Pugh x Reader

You’re there as Florence does her Vogue cooking video and photo shoot

Note: I’m just obsessed with this new video and photo shoot. Enjoy!

Florence Pugh Masterlist, Main Masterlist

“Alright Florence, let’s roll the cameras!” the director says excitedly.

You watch as Flo does her introduction. It’s your favorite thing to see her so happy and giggling as she does a variation of her famous Cooking with Flo starting line.

“Do you want to hand her the ingredients?” a woman asks you.

“Oh yes please, darling!” Florence answers for you. You agree with a smile.

As you hand her each ingredient from off the screen it takes everything in her not to turn and smile at you. She adorably puts the ingredients together and takes a break as the bread cooks in the oven. You stand next to her shoulder to shoulder.

“So, what did you think of the shoot earlier?” Flo asks you.

“The fish was a choice,” you say with a laugh.

“I knew you would comment on that!” she says through giggles. “I thought it was weird too, but the photographer was eating it up.”

You wrap an arm around her shoulders, and she leans her head onto your shoulder.

“But the gold dress in the kitchen? I know that one is going to need to be framed.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yep. It should be framed and put on the refrigerator,” you say.

Florence chuckles once again and you love the sound. “I’ll frame it for you, sweetheart.”

Her bread is ready, and you leave her with a quick kiss to her lips.

You have to hold back laughs as she remembers her cilantro, knowing you’ll tease her later so you can see that pout and kiss it away.

“And now I’ll be dancing to stock music!” Florence says with the cute excitement she always has.

 They cut the cameras, but Florence keeps dancing.

“Come join me, my darling!” she calls for you. You grin as she dances with you and spins you around in her arms, holding your waist from behind.

“I love you and I’m so proud of you, Flossie,” you tell her, your head leaning back into her shoulder.

“I love you too, baby,” she says. She kisses your cheek. “Oh, were you videoing?”

“Yep, and it’s super adorable!” the director shows you and Florence the video of you two dancing together.

“I can’t wait to post this when the video comes out!” Florence cheers, her hand locked securely in yours.

You’re so proud of your girl and her two Vogue covers. You can’t wait to see where she goes from here.

Tag List: @gracebutnotgraceful @i-wished-for-you-too @be-missed @mythosphere-x @likefirenrain @hehehehannahthings @laaurrel @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @flosbelova @ggrangerdanger @mrswidowjohansson @alotofpockets @maia-lightwoood @xxromanoffxx @whitemanshoe19 @peanutbutterprincess @picnicmic @wandaslittlewhore @marie45019 @kacka84 @sammi1642 @hb8301 @the-night-owl-blr @avatarsnips @romanoffswoman @natashasilverfox @red1culous @rach2602 @lovelyy-moonlight @idkjustliving2 @youralphawolf72 @btay3115 @belovaskitkat @itbeila @shin-conan-kun @notbornbutforged @makegoodchoices @theprinceofmarvel @blue-serendipityy @bookfrog242 @wizardofstories @karsonromanoff @natismywife @dumb-fawkin-bitch @wandamaximoff-simp

[yelenasdiary]

Hey

How about a moodboard for cooking with Flo?

Taglist: @red1culous | @bentleywolf29 | @jeyramarie | @lissaaaa145 | @high--power | @parkerdaramitzzzz | @mmmmokdok | @wackymcstupid | @kiwiana145  | @sophie-xox | @observeowl | @nattyolw | @ripofflizzie | @get-the-fuck-outta-here | @goofy-goonie | @makegoodchoices | @apollo2907 | @marvelfan98 | @wandaroman0ff | @dumb-fawkin-bitch | @lovelyy-moonlight | @santana1437 | @sophie-xox | @fluffyblanketgecko | @inluvwithfictionalwomen | @jaymieflorissssssss | @tita001 | @youralphawolf72 | @crescent-witch | @randomnessbecausewhynot | @natashamaximoff69 | @a-dorkier-book-keeper | @hehehehannahthings | @blue-serendipityy | @secrettoallofyou | @romantic-slaps-on-the-asss | @marvel-fan-2021 | @mmmmokdok | @riveramorylunar | @ripofflizzie | @toldthatdevil | @itsmv3 | @katiemay-025 | @livresjaunes | @maria-403 | @boredandneedfanfics | @wandamaximoffspuppup | @xox-little-troublemaker-xox | @shibugs | @livresjaunes | 

[littlexscarletxwitch]

Seeing her cooking just makes me so happy 💗

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

Do you perhaps have any headcanons about New Mexico? I don’t see that much about him and he’s my home state so I’m desperate for any content lol (also sorry if it’s late for you cause it’s currently late for me but I don’t have a sleep schedule so-) but if you don’t, anything about Loui or Cal would be also be cool :]

Sorry m8 I don’t really have anything for New Mexico :( I do have some stuff for Cali and Loui tho :D

California:

He either was or is an e-boy. He has the f*ckin’ e-boy haircut too. :3

He’s a nerd and he loves books. Bro probably has an entire stash of books under his bed.

Cali pretends to hate Florida and Loui (mostly Flo though), but if anything bad happened to them he would never forgive himself.

This man can’t cook for sh*t. He’s okay at those microwaveable ramen bowls, but otherwise, he can’t cook and should not be allowed within 15ft of the kitchen’s entrance.

He has an orange tabby named Cassy and she is a dumb spoiled little bitch. She’s cute tho <3

LOUIIIII-[gets gunned down by marine corps] Louisiana:

Literally everybody loves Loui and tries to protect him, and what makes it funnier and cuter is that he’s completely unaware of the fact that he has an entire Loui Protection Squad™️.

Clumsy silly lil guy that always has bandages on his knees, face, and/or arms.

Florida makes it a point to tell Loui if he’s going somewhere cuz he knows that if he doesn’t tell him, he’ll panic. But nobody’s gonna know that Loui is panicking unless they look and see how shaky and fidgety he’s being. And if they bring it up, Loui will 100% deny the fact that he’s panicking. Even with tears in his eyes.

Loui doesn’t ever wish to hurt anyone, but at the same time if you hurt his loved ones, he will murder you and laugh like a psycho as he does it.

^Executing someone that hurts his loved ones? Yes. 100%. Getting revenge on the people that hurt hi- NOPE. He will NOT.

He’s gets anxious really easily, but mainly if there’s loud noise. So sometimes during meetings, if he’s not joining Florida in terrorizing Gov, he’s trying not to have an anxiety attack. I hc that Texas sits next to Loui (I think this is actually canon-), and Georgia sits across, so often they’ll be the ones trying to calm him down (Georgia holding his hands under the table and Texas hugging him a bit with his hand on Loui’s knee 😭).

[anthony-lockwoods-italian-rapier]

George Cubbins/Karim headcanons?

there’s not much i can say about this man becuase he is already perfect.,.but i will try

-i do think he is legally blind without glasses like that bitch can’t see anything

-he gives demiboy vibes, and pan/bi <33 love him fr fr

-i think he has all his friends’ egg orders down pat. lockwood likes his on toast, intact, but so that if you poke it with a fork it’s a little runny, lucy likes hers fried but a Little bit soft, holly eats hard-boiled ofc, flo drinks those awful raw egg shakes for 💪protein💪 and she probably gets lockwood in on it too. kipps just eats dry fucking toast.

-lockwood was a malnourished british boy raised on entirely greige food and george really said hell nah we giving you the real persian shit, high-fived his mom, and went to work

-lucy also comes in knowing only bIscUiTs n gRaVy and george is determined to condition her like pavlov.

-i think he smells like cardamom. he just does ok

-autism

-special interest in the problem!! lucy and george have to remind him to eat. they even tried to cook for him once and almost started a fire.

-once when he was sick they actually did cook for him and were absolutely WARLIKE about getting it right (george couldn’t sleep bc they were yelling at each other about tablespoons) but they got it no fire or anything and brought some food up to him and he started crying

-i think he wears cool little bracelets

-i saw a post once that because he was raised in a #engineer family, he knows absolutely egregious amounts of engineering and just assumes this is normal. “what do you mean you don’t know all the hazen-williams constants, everybody knows the hazen-williams constants.”

-i’m so bad at headcanons whakdkdnsjd

-this boy cares so much it hurts. have you ever seen him talk about the Problem or his friends or his family?? he cares so deeply about so many things and HE JS THE BEST OF US FR FR

-he loves his found family hope this helps <3

[hell0kittyland]

Anti vent???

Warning long as fuck:

So y’all, today I stood infront of a mirror and actually inspected my body and did a proper body check. And you know what I never realised how much body dysmorphia has ruined my life😭 because I don’t even look THAT bad. Granted the weightloss is a must and I need a flat stomach but as for the stretch marks and uneven skintone, it’s really not that fucking bad. Cause in my head I was so out of it I was at peace with dying alone and never getting a boyfriend or having a first kiss, and I’m FUCKING 20? I turned 20 this years June.. and I’m like the amount of guys I’ve rejected is crazy all because I’m so insecure with my body it’s insane, like I’m going to have a mental meltdown if a man sees me unclothed because my brain will genuinely push itself to suicide or something insane because I’ll demean myself ext and it’s just sad. But I looked in the mirror today with no makeup ext it was the morning and I was just wearing my bra and panties and I inspected myself and my tits are actually pretty there not saggy not perky, sit nice and are a nice shape and amount. I’m very tall at 5”9 so I have a model look especially with my cheekbones on my face so I’m genuinely a pretty girl however I never care enough because I’m so obsessed with the mentality of “maybe in the next life” or “maybe if I reincarnate into a normal girl I won’t have to deal with this shit” which why do I have to wait till I FUCKING DIE to be happy, wear the clothes I want and have a relationship. Now bitch I’m not trying to sound conceited yeah I’m a little crazy and I’m diagnosed autism + adhd goes crazy and yeah I have BPD tendencies (not diagnosed) in close relationships where I self destruct because of self hate and abandonment issues that I ruin everything. Yeah I’m socially fucking extremely awkward and I’m corny as hell but you know what, I sat there and I was fuck, if I was a male, I would date me. Oh 100% like I WOULD unironically date me. And realising this had me abit shocked. You know I sat there and spread my legs and inspected my kitty and I was like hmmm it’s not bad tmi but you know I actually had a pretty conventionally tight cough cough. So I checked my ass and my thighs and yeah my legs are weirdly disproportionately skinny compared to my top half but my ass wasn’t that bad either. But I was like … the fucking stretch marks got me, I’m not talking 1 or 2 or a few. I’m talking them bitches EVERYWHERE like In places you wouldn’t even expect.

And I sat there like okay I’m really not that bad I just need to work on myself abit, fix my life, get a proper job and make enough money cause I’m broke ass bitch currently with no life so once I’m economically up I can get treatment for the stretchmarks and save up. Move out of home stuff like this AND THEN I can try dating which is a huge thing since I was actually so convinced I would die alone, but now I’m like wtf I’m kinda not ugly. Like mentally I was hell bent that I was a science experiment, if y’all saw what I looked like ext you would think… bitch you look fine. Which it’s those things where you see yourself in a completely different way than others and it’s like a mental disease. Consuming too much media since I was child fucked up the way I saw bodies and shit, but like I was on the app flo and reading womens stories about there relationship wnd insecurities I realised how NORMAL my issues where… like all this time my autistic ass brain made it seem like I’m a monster with a lisp and a fucked up body and woahhh nobody will ever love me but then I read stuff about women where I’m like… hold on this is kinda… normal?

Fucking ED and my messed up culture and family have Ruined my body image forever, diet culture in my home is so normal my mom has a undiagnosed ED it’s so obvious, my sister does fucking everybody fasts like it’s normal and there’s all types of Ana related shit at home 😭 I asked my mom but me a 1 cal oil spray to cook so it doesn’t stick to the skillet since olive oil is fucking ridiculously high in cals

And she bought me not ONE but TWO. Obviously she told me to stop and cried when I did a 30 day water fast and said I looked like those starved kids in poorer countries 😭 cause of my cheeks hollowed out but in general dieting is encouraged and rewarded in my extremely dysfunctional home.

Anyways TLDR: learned I’m not a complete ugly pig monster oink oink 🐷 today and I’m not even that bad, just some adjustments and improvements so uh don’t worry I’m still stuck with my fucking life sucking ED but I don’t really give a fuck and I’m kinda content with life today hehe