#it’s been a very hard two weeks
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i’m gonna miss her so so much <3 light of my life
#my baby#today is our last day together <33#but i’ll forever b her mama#it’s been a very hard two weeks#and i’ve never known a heart could feel so heavy#sorry for being sad on main but i needed to make a lil post ;(#it’s easier doing this then telling people individually about it when they ask how she’s doin 🥺#i’m sorry i haven’t been responding/active much i have just been overwhelmed !#sending love <3#ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭ zelda ༶ ⋆
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ALASTOR & LUCIFER | ᴘᴀʀᴀʟʟᴇʟꜱ + ꜱɪᴍɪʟᴀʀɪᴛɪᴇꜱ
#hazbin hotel#lucifer morningstar#hazbin lucifer#alastor#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel edit#hazbin edit#my gifs#character highlight#requested#parallels#anon it has been two literal weeks since you sent that one in i am SORRY!!#i didn't expect to get more than like 3 in my inbox and I also got so goddamn busy irl ksjdhfklsjdfh#but also ngl either i've been working very hard on my fic too ahahahaha
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Day 14
#daily castiel#August 11th#TWO WEEKS YEAHHH#castiel#spn#castiel fanart#supernatural#supernatural fanart#castiel supernatural#Right now most of these are just little doodle cases (cas plural ?) and honestly that’s all I signed up for lmao. It’s been very fun so far#Also I feel I want to mention how fricking hard drawing cas is for me for some reason#The other day I did a study of misha’s face and oh boy.
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Hatchetfield @femslashfortnight Day 2: Retro
#would you look at that- it’s another hfff drawing#incredible#some Hollowebby for the soul#I just really think they’re neat yknow#This isn't one of my favorite drawings but hey thats alright#that's cool#they can't all be bangers but for what it's worth it isn't horrible#anyways yeah#now i'm going to go work on Art Fight stuff#very exciting#I don't know how much I'm going to be able to do for it but I guess we'll find out#so much drawing this summer#it's crazy i've been out of school for two weeks and i've drawn like 10 things already#these hands cant stop wont stop#Anyways I love the idea of them skating#I'm a roller blader myself but the skates are cute#did some fun textures and reflections in this one too#I love roller blading tho#wish I could do it more often#fun fact: despite it's portrayal in minecraft- obsidian ranks at a 5-6 on the mohs hardness scale- being the same hardness as opal or glass#idk that's what i came up with for todays fact- i feel like most people know that one but idk#hatchetfield femslash fortnight#hollowebby#miss holloway#webby#hatchetfield#nightmare time#starkid#team starkid#kim whalen
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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Rules: list five of your favorite movies and have people vote on which one matches your vibe the best!
Tagged by @biathediamond :)
If anyone wants to steal this poll game, feel free to do so!! Reblog with your poll or make a new post—and if the latter, please tag me so I can see & vote :D
ALSO if you would like to then please tell me what you voted for in a reply/reblog!! I am extremely curious!
#my post#my polls#tag game#it was SUCH a hard choice between Bolt or Interstellar#Interstellar is arguably the Better movie and it’s beautiful and haunting and has nearly reduced me to tears and it’s real and it’s human#and it’s just. incredible#very very good movie I like it very much#BUT Bolt is way more nostalgic and I also went through a phase where I’d watch it every week/every few weeks#for like. two years#both are amazing movies and both are some of my favorites#but c’mon man#I had to go with Bolt#gosh I wanna watch it again it’s been far too long#KRIFF I forgot to add an option for me to push :( misery and despair and wailing
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#finishing up my last two weeks of this notice period before i can finally start my new job with a BANG#aka one of the directors throwing as much last minute work at me as she can before I go 😂🙈#we did the workshop yesterday! i did 95% of the work for it so getting to talk to 50 charities about how to showcase their impact was great#but the fact my role in everything is being downplayed because im leaving is less than great#and just yeah ahahaha this is why I'm leaving!#going to miss my team but it's honestly a little hard to focus on under the barrage of last minute things omg#but nearly done!!!!#i will return from the war friends#i have been playing the new dragon age and i am very fond of lucanis#AND ANTOINE AND EVKA#(the true otp omg)#tbd
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[ID: a scribbly four panel digital comic of characters from the owl house. The first panel shows Camilla, Luz, and Raine. Camilla stands holding her bat, looking at Raine as they speak to her. Luz watches in the background. The second panel shows Raine posing in front of Eda, Lilith, Darius, Alador, Steve and Hooty. In the first panel Raine says "miss Noceda, I speak for all of us when I say-" and finishes their dialogue in the next panel with "we're proud to welcome to the polycule!".
The third panel is a reaction shot of all the adults reacting to what Raine just said, and the fourth shows Raine blushing and waving their hands, saying "I MEANT REBELLION-", while Camilla blushes and Luz looks dismayed. End ID]
Silly comic idea I had to get out. Sorry for the potential quality, I'd already gotten too far into drawing when I realized the canvas might be a teeny bit too small
#the owl house#toh#raine whispers#camilla noceda#they're the two prominent characters here and everyone else is just a bg scribble so i won't tag everyone else hdbdjfj#anyway would you believe this has been floating in my brain for. months now?? literally since ttt aired and camilla joined the kids#i decided to not do anything for the apocalypse designs of the hagsquad other than ''cool capes'' bc it's just gonna get debunked in-#-a couple or so weeks when promotion for the ep starts so yknow#anyway. camilla is very flattered but she's still not over manny so while it's not a hard no to the witch polycule#it's not a yes#not pictured is the absolute typo in the groupchat moment that happens after this w/ the hagsquad#darius is GETTING THEIR ASS. YOU SAID THAT!! TO HER FACE!!!#eda wants to join in on the bullying but she's too worried abt making a good impression in front of camilla to joke abt it lmao
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kunikida: i don’t know how you deal with that
dazai: what?? atsushi and akutagawa’s sexual tension? we have bigger things to worry about
kunikida: they’re destroying a building right now
dazai: ….the other things are still more important…..probably….
#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#bsd incorrect quotes#bsd shin soukoku#akuatsu#bsd dazai#bsd kunikida#bsd atsushi#bsd akutagawa#i like thinking about kunikida trying very hard to stay away from the whole atsushi akutagawa situation lol#like no thank you that is all dazai#absolutely NOT kunikida’s problem#he says while ignoring the sounds of explosions in the distance#they have been On My Mind lately#because i have committed to the idea of catching back up with both the manga AND the anime in the next week or two#im sick of having to keep all the tags blocked#i miss them
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wait they nerfed knifegate???
#i was in the middle of doing the echo grind for that#i mean thank god because it made me hate what is otherwise a very cool ambition#they all have grinds but echo grinds always feel the worst#and that one was like how would you like to not play the game at all for months#the only other thing in ambitions that has been anywhere near as frustrating#is all the card draws you need for hearts desire#yeah yeah it's a card game i get it#but when that translates to waiting to draw a card for two weeks#and it's hard to do other stuff while you wait without ducking in and out of storylets constantly#it's just like.... why#dreamgate was kind of the ultimate culmination of that#light fingers and bag a legend did not ever make me want to put down the game and say nah#the writing for all of them is so good it's just some of the mechanics are aaaahhhhhh#fallen london#flmp#mp#i have enough echoes already with the nerf this feels weird
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For years I had been seeing my therapist three times a week. But towards the end of this summer she told me that she was going to cut her therapist working days down to two days a week, so we wouldn't be able to do that anymore. But we agreed on one normal length session and one 90 minute session to compensate. And there are pros and cons to that. On the one hand, it can be nice to have an extra day free with no appointments, and having a longer session one of the days gives us space to really delve into things. On the other hand, our total time is less. And, most importantly, it gives us a lot less flexibility if she has to cancel or reschedule on one of the days, which she has to do fairly frequently. On top of being a therapist she is a full time professor, the mom of an elementary schooler, and has aging parents that she's caring for. She's extremely busy and her life is very hectic and full of moving pieces, and she semi frequently has to move things around or cancel. Which was more okay when we were meeting three times a week, because then many weeks we would only meet twice but that was still twice. But with now meeting twice a week whenever something comes up or she gets sick or we have to cancel for whatever reason there's a much bigger impact. I can make two sessions a week work, as long as I genuinely have those two sessions. But on one a week I start to really struggle, especially if it happens multiple weeks in a row. And lately there has been a lot of cancellations and reschedulings and it's just really stressful and has been wearing on me and it sucks.
#text post#my post#yes i know i'm incredibly privileged to even have a therapist let alone see one multiple times a week#so it's a little absurd to complain about twice a week therapy#but the fact remains that having to significantly decrease our time over the past two months has been very hard on me#and it's never her fault she just has a super complicated life#but it can be really difficult esp when the changes are last minute
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this is one of my favorite theses in the inkworld each way it plays out is so!!
elinor's dad valued his books over her and her sisters to the point she internalizes it and becomes the same kind of hermit he was, before and after the folcharts come back into her life. basta was groomed into believing he was inherently unlovable except by capricorn so he'd do anything to keep that small remaining amount of love. brianna realizes if dustfinger wasn't dead then he had to have abandoned her, so the next person to give her their full attention? she'll throw away every other relationship she has for them, the same way she was thrown away. the verbal abuse violante endured as a kid (and currently, because 19 is still a kid) influenced the kind of mother she is and she doesn't even realize until it's almost too late that she's done to jacopo what the adder did to her! and I've already talked about the physical abuse from farid's birth family influencing how he forms severely anxious relationships.
and none of these are just character padding! all of these characters influence the plot so heavily by becoming traumatized and by working through it and I don't have any idea how she pulled it off
#okay maybe elinor didnt very much#im trying to be nice to her bc i dont like her at all lmao#this is not written half as well as i want it to be but ive been dwelling on it for two weeks and i cant think of how else to say it so#meggie's like the only significant kid who does not ever once think shes worthless#mo raised a mean child but he did not raise one with low self esteem lol good for her#i tried really hard not to lean into the daddy issues thing but terrible fathers is such a good theme#inkheart#says kenna#hey uhhhh how is it 2am#was gonna point out how lol jehan also doesnt have this prob but i remembered it's lowkey on my tcor wishlist for him#which#i should post my wishlist probably do yall have any interest in seeing that#i have Theories
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what do you mean if i wanna write on a fandom-specific blog that i have to try and be part of that specific rpc. what do you mean i can’t just exist in my personal void and people won’t just occasionally manifest. what do you mean i have to convince people all over again to give my oc’s a chance while also trying to get a feel for my canon portrayals. what do you mean—
#WHAT DO YOU MEANNNNN#honestly the idea of it all sounds so stressful and it’s a sore spot i won’t lie 😭#i hate trying to enter and branch out in fandoms bc it’s often just!! hard!! harder than it needs to be!!#not even with this blog have i tried very hard to enter new fandoms bc it kills my spirits tbh#i’ve just let people find me for the most part and indulged in fandoms with my mutuals who write in them#that’s been most comfortable for me#but if i go through with this m.ha blog i gotta be brave and i’m just :((( somebody better hold my hand :(((#asdfg anyway forgive my lack of writing! it’s been a tiring last two days but i’ll try to crank stuff out later this week 💜#get ready to ramble | ooc
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S1 Pulp Musicals Gang my beloved
#minus Chester because drawing his hat was genuinely aggravating and I wanted to choose peace#I love these little goobers#y’know what else I love?#pulp musicals#belive it or not#god it’s so good#I will never stop talking about how incredible pulp musicals is#just fyi#so fucking pumped for pulp 4#god it’s going to be so good#These were so much fun#might do some more later#thought i'd just get these done and posted tho bc i'm been working HARD on curtwen week stuff yall#so far ive got two done#only 6 to go#thank god finals are over bc im gonna be on that GRIND#i'm really excited for em so far tho#I genuinely really like the first two that are done so far#ngl i kinda ate#but yeah it's all very exciting#alr time for our fun fact#fun fact: the hashtag symbol is actually called an octothorpe#no longer saying im going to leave it in the tags- it's in the octothorpes now people /j#rose stratford#samuel stratford#sir john herschel#john herschel#benjamin park#margaret cavendish#the great moon hoax
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If anyone remembers all the dental work I needed done uhhhhhhh three years ago and never went back and ran away forever…I’m finally going back to a dentist on Thursday to restart the process and face my deep and utter abiding terror. And I also scheduled my COVID and flu vaccines for a couple hours later. And my psych appointment to restart meds.
I figured get it all done in one day, have my miserable immune reaction on Friday that I seem to always get with Moderna COVID shots, and then flee directly into the weekend and never be a person again except when I’m on and off crying. It’s going to be so kind to future me to get these things done and I can do it no matter how much I feel like I am constantly about to Actually Physically Die.
#you can see why I’m restarting meds#my brain is constantly convincing me that my teeth are about to actually finish rotting out of my mouth and I probably have an abscess#already that is going to give me a jaw or heart infection#which is VERY unlikely#and that my dog is deeply sick and I should rehome her and give her to someone who’ll take proper care of her and isn’t me#yadda yadda#it’s been fucking miserable#the only good part is 1) I’m going to get the worst part over with (starting the process) and#2) even if I completely flee and refuse to go back I’ll have one dental cleaning at least helping with plaque buildup and stuff#this is so fucking EMBARRASSING it’s all so EMBARASSING#it shouldn’t be this hard for me and I know it’s irrational#I’m just so scared because it’s so triggering for me for NO REASON and#I KNOW that this time when we get to the multiple fillings and at least one root canal and also my impacted wisdom teeth that it’ll be#different and I won’t go un-numb or if I do again they’ll have better checks in place for when I panic lie to their faces#but it doesn’t help#and I’m so sure they’re gonna tell me I need three or more root canals because I’ve waited way way too long#and I STILL can’t consistently keep up with brushing and flossing#which is the most embarassing and shameful thing in the world and I KNOW#but I’m scared shitless of all of it and it’s all a sensory nightmare!!!!!!!!!!!!#anyway I’m not going to be okay later this week and I’m not particularly okay now#so if I’m not around online much#that’s why#but I’m happy news Aoife and I are having some lovely walks this week and she’s very cute and snuggly and we played tug a lot of times yest#*yesterday and she also stayed sniffing a bush while a bike went past two feet away#instead of getting startled and needing to hop or bark at it and then calm down#I’m so proud of her#and I wouldn’t be able to do this at all without my very kind partner who spearheaded scheduling the dentist (and researching places)#after my jaw pain nervous breakdown last week#health#personal
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Ulrike's Big Night, Part I
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Transcript under the cut.
Helena: “Enough stalling, Faust! At this rate, it’ll be over before we reach the front door.”
Ulrike: “Patience, Zhao. One should never enter the hornet’s nest stone-cold sober.”
Helena: “You make it sound like torture. I thought art was, like, your reason for existing.”
Ulrike: *sighs* “It’s the art itself that matters to me, not the bullshit surrounding it. Sadly, participation is required if you ever want your real art to be seen.”
Helena: “Well, if you’re intent on getting through this thing stoned, I can’t in good conscience let you do it alone. Now, hand that over.”
Ulrike: “Let’s just get this over with.”
Helena: “You won’t even give me a hint?”
Ulrike: “Nope. But they wanted postmodern and I think I outpostmoderned everyone here by a mile.”
#ts4#sims 4#ts4 story#sims 4 story#sims 4 edit#simblr#story: hzid#very happy with how this one came together!#i was originally planning for the entire night to be one post#but it would've been so indulgently lengthy lol#so part two is tomorrow!#then i have two smaller posts tying it all up but i might save them for next week to give you time to digest first#also sorry the text is kind of hard to read#i can never seem to get it exactly right!#helena zhao#ulrike faust
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